Hope this email finds you well. Overworked and Underplayed is a not safe for
work Dungeons and Dragons actual play podcast about a group of young professionals from the
real world who find themselves transported to a strangely familiar place full of fantasy and
magic. See attached for episode descriptions and content warnings. Thanks for listening.
All right, guys, we need to brainstorm ideas for the last episode.
So who remembers what happened? Oh? Wait, what? Sorry? I
zoned out? That's fine. Do you remember what we like did last episode?
So we can do this recap or whatever? Oh jokes? Yeah,
all right, So what kind of jets do you have? No, guys,
I gotta use my detail power here. We gotta know. No,
I know, I did like you know, it's kind of funny you didn't
long joves? No, I want to swallows and the cherry pyeah and then
his aunt. Are you guy serious right now? Or are you trying to
be funny? Greetings listeners, This is Overworked and Underplayed a D and D
podcast for young professionals. Buy young professionals. I am your DM or District
manager Alex Capps and today's ice breaker. What is something from your character's bucket
list that they have not accomplished yet. Oh you said bucket list? What
up? That's your boy? Marcel Hardy planying Richard Cox, the human consultant
turned halfling bard who holy believes it's better to be lucky than good, but
it's best to be both. Let's see. Okay, bucket list, probably
skydiving? What what did you What did you think? What did you think?
Us said, Well, just to leave that to the imagination. Hello,
my name is Anelin Hardy, and I play Taylor Jacobs, a centaur
barbarian with a heart of gold, and on Taylor's bucket list one day she
wants to be CEO of Coca Cola. Wow, okay yeah in the Sights
High Yeah, Hi everyone, I'm Katie and I played Crystal the dra Druid
with her very own MLM, Crystal Clarity, And the thing on her bucket
list that she has yet to accomplish is to actually take down another MLM and
take all of their consultants. That's ultimate, Like Murge would be the ultimate
recruiting tactic, is like just swoop in and take the entire down line of
the whole company. Get one one and then zoom. You know, Hey,
I'm Marjorie. I play Amy and Amanda, a basic, b rough
and tumble human fighter with the freshly minted dentistry degree. She would love to
meet Dwayne the Rock Johnson one day. Okay, yeah, and he's like
a wrestler, you know, It's just it's he's like an idol to her.
Oh yeah, Hi, I'm Tyler, played Bill's Buckets. Dared him
is to create an internet meme when that goes viral. I assume yeah,
or just anyone, just anyone No no, no, no, like a
Amy Amy, none of himself. It's got to be someone else. Yet
nobody wants to be scumbag Steve all right for Karen, Hey, listeners,
This show is made possible by the support of our awesome patrons. In addition
to a thank you for their support, our patrons get an ad free listening
experience and access to exclusive bonus content. In the weeks between episodes, our
patrons are getting an extra show where we recap episodes and talk about some of
our favorite moments. For more details about what you can get by supporting us
on Patreon, check us out at patreon dot com. Slash own up pod.
All right, so when we last left off, you guys were the
butt of a lot of dick jokes and uh and you got some new uh,
you got some new help in your fight against the Church of Clarity watching
fall out, fight against communism more so fight for capitalism, I guess.
But you guys, we're gonna pick up you get with you guys after you've
returned to the ricks and you have begun your training montage or or wrapping up
your training montage, and so uh all right, well okay, well that's
that's about all we uh, that's about all we get that we can help
you with. You guys look stronger already. Thanks for working me out so
good. Ray, But I feel really confident now, like like extra dextrous,
you know, like I could almost have another attack in a in a
combat situation. So I mean, thanks a lot, man. I give
him a high five. Well I've got I've got to admit, uh,
when you asked me to help walk you out a little bit, Uh,
this wasn't exactly what I hadn't mind, but uh, I also had a
great time. And you know, do you maybe want to go have a
drink or to celebrate or or go, uh go have dinner sometime maybe sometime.
We have a lot of stuff to do though, so oh yeah,
I understand you're very, very busy. Is this where we all describe our
treating. Yes. Richard comes up. He's like, come on, Rick,
we just talked about this. You got to go in with confidence,
like we've worked on this. You guys helped us train. I helped you
get more confident. And so Richard gives him a Bardic inspiration to try again.
Well, thanks, thanks, Rick, but I don't know what happens
because every time I get close to him, my hands just get all sweaty,
and I start thinking of of like sports or something like. It's really
weird. I don't know how to process it all, but I'll give it
a try. Richard gives one of the ricks of Bartic inspiration. So he
is going to come back to Amy and and he is going to try to
make a persuasion check. Oh that's cocked, ye okay, yeah yeah,
so okay, so oh god, what would the opposition to that be?
Intimidation? Sure, if that's what you want to try to intimidate him out
of a date. Uh so, so he rolled, So go ahead and
roll for intimidation, and since because of the of y'all's quote unquote relationship,
I'm gonna give you advantage. Okay, all right, I got an eighteen,
dang it, I got a sixteen. So so he walks up and
you see it, and you're just already like getting getting defensive or not defensive,
but you're already getting ready to like You're like okay. He goes,
yeah, has eBoy ever told you your shade of color in your eyes just
glimmers in the moonlight. So Amyen is making the same face that Marjorie is
making. She's like, huh. He really takes it, takes her off
guard, like, I guess, no, thank you. He said,
I found this amazing place over by the Riverland District around like like ten pm.
The reflection off the water would just look stunning on you. Are you
feeling okay? I am a bit lightheaded? Okay, ri Rick, Rick,
this is perfect. Like you've you've done, You've done exactly what you
need to do. You came in with confidence, and then I think that's
a good first step and we'll keep moving forward. Richard knows that you don't
like him, but like he's trying to boost this guy's self esteem. So
he's like slowly getting him used to like, you know, talking to other
people, not just you, but you know, people in general. That's
why Richard had some confidence. And we're going to direct that confidence somewhere else.
I like it. You you can, you can mull it over.
You don't have to give me an answer. Wrought now, Okay, okay,
yeah, let me do that because I'm still like, you know,
mopping the sweat from my brow. So give me, give me a couple
of minutes. A couple of minutes. Amian doesn't think about it too too
long, does she. She doesn't make it not to take away from this
poignant moment. But how do the rest of you feel? Oh? Yeah,
Bentley feels great? It was really great how you taught me how to
you know, you said, oh, you know how you attacked twice?
What if you did a third time? You know that was your great I
never thought of that before. And then when you were like, wow,
you know how you like prey to cast your spells? What if you like
prayed extra hard and casting stronger spells? Nice level? I never would have
thought of that. You know, I do what I can, but hey,
hey, you remember what I said, no need to take this offline.
Overworked and under played will circle back after these messages. You know,
we don't really have that much in the way spell books her, but there's
that library with the Atheneum that might be able to help you with some of
the stuff you're looking for. Oh yeah, I'll be sure to hit that
up, Richard. Do you want to go with me to check that out
here in a bit? Yeah, I think I have a short list of
things I kind of want to focus in on short and Richard just frowns.
I'm sorry, buddy, I'm sorry. So Taylor is feeling super quick,
like she was working on sprints, so her speed has increased, and she
also feels like she can hit another time in battle. She also has extra
attack endurance. Yeah for her, like montage or whatever. It's like the
sun beating down and like beads of sweat and she's like drenched, and then
she takes off her blazer and like rings out. Oh god, it's like
magically dry. What is that thing made out of pure rayon polyes? S?
Yeah exactly. Oh yeah, she's feeling good though, awesome. Oh
yeah, you know, we do what we can. What about your friend
here. How are you feeling, Crystal? I mean, I don't really
not much different, honestly, I just one more, one more spell Slatta
seems like everybody else got much cooler. Unless I'm wrong, I'm extra attack
and level two spells is pretty big for paladins. Crystal, you seem more
magical. Huh, Crystal, you seem more magical or something. Yeah,
h So thanks for not a lot. It's been great, well, Crystal,
Next time I ask Great to work you out, he's he's putting me
through the hoops. I do feel healthier. I feel like maybe if someone
I reckon, if if Amen's okay with that, I could I could probably
help you a bit. Thanks, but I don't want to hear it.
You got two level three spell slots. That's huge, and all of y'all's
proficiency bonus just went to plus three instead of plus two. That's right.
That's a big deal. Did you not get any like wild shape benefits or
anything, considering she never wild shapes, probably not so so, so just
to be clear, she actually got a wild shape improvement at level four.
Uh. This could be the training that she needed to utilize that, which
is uh that you can use swimming speed, wild shapes now like crocodiles and
stuff. That's right. Yeah, well it's a lot like Crystal to just
not be it's just not quite enough. It's not good enough for her.
Yeah, yep, I get to do more more spells. Everyone else seems
to more. So I'm just I'm just picturing, like like everyone else is
doing all this hard work, and Crystal's found like a lounger and she's just
reading a book. She's getting more relaxed. That's what she needs. Just
all right, guys, Well, I'm glad we were able to help.
And uh, you know this is uh I gotta admit this is not where
I saw this, uh this whole uh uh thing between us and you guys
going. But you know, you guys are pretty cool. Like I'm glad
we met you guys at that bar. We didn't kill y'all. We're glad
you didn't kill us too. I mean it was really close, like head
like a pistol pointed at like one of your uh uh like lower areas.
Wait, you're going to shoot up. I wasn't going to shoot y'all.
Was just drugged Richard in our lower areas well under the table, like you
don't do it above the table, Like who does that? Like that's then
the enemy knows what you're doing. Like, come on now, feel was
a little underhanded. And also some of us would like to have children when
we're older, so maybe keep those guns to yourself. What healing spells are
for for children? You don't know if you know much about the birthing process,
but there's a lot of healing that needs to be done. Healing spells
are like Wu tang, it's for the kids. All right, Well,
if there's anything else we can help you, guys working in the future,
just feel free to stop ear and like yes, oh yeah, maybe when
we hit level six, maybe nice to do this again. What's a level?
Yes? Is woo tang? The type of drink? No, it's
type of music was okay drink right labor? Yeah, man, that that
is a missed opportunity if I've ever seen one. Right, Uh, it's
like a spiked spiked tang just makes it go wounds, Wu tang. That
could be a mixed drink. Talk about a throwback to Amy Enn's obsession with
with wrestling. All right, so what are you guys up to next?
So let's just say, Bentley and Richard are on their way back from the
Athenium. You know, we kind of did our spell thing or whatever actually
there, so the DM has an opportunity to show us actually give us good
ship. All right, So, so I know Bentley and Richard talked about
going to the Atheneum. Almost about the time you guys are getting through,
there is a knock at the door. Beautiful you goblin Graham. Is this
at the Rick's house? Yes? I think, why would it be for
me? I mean, thanks thanks Bentley? Hello, Hello, HELLI you're
so short. He's not that short. Hello. I have a message here
for one miss Crystal. Two point hystals for you, Crystal. I see
you sitting there. Will you come to this up? Ok? So,
sir follow me and I lead him to Crystal. Uh yes, Uh,
mister Captain Montiac is looking for you. He says. The is uh of
utmost importance that he is running low on supplies, and uh, here is
a list of items he needs to complete the orders that you gave him.
And he hands you a list and it looks like it's about like a thousand
potions worth of ingredients. Is that on top of the amount of potions that
they just made yes on top yes on top of those. But as you're
looking over the ingredients, some of them don't look familiar to you. These
are my this isn't my work, but these aren't I didn't make these.
Hey, look, I'm just a messenger. Okay. I probably need to
talk to him about false advertising. I mean, we can stretch it sometimes,
but like this might be a little bit much. Sounds like you should
set up a meeting. Yeah, I think so. I think you need
to figure out why he's selling things I've never even given him before, which,
you know what, good for him. That's a lot of hustle.
So he's willing to be created and make sure up on the fly. What.
I can't fault him for that. So I guess he's a boss babe
through and through. Yeah, better respect the hustle, I guess. You
see, as the messenger is kind of like standing there, kind of whistling,
like looking both ways with like a hand sticking out, Oh here you
go. But and I give him a silver piece hate you see, he
bites it and he says pleasure during business and he just scurries away. Look
at me. I'm not breaking the local economy. But just giving. I
get I get the feeling that probably it was more than he was expecting.
I mean, oh, well, how much were you going to give him?
Crystal? Oh, I shouldn't have to tip? On top of that,
What did you say that I was gonna say, like, Crystal,
type should be like you guys should unionize so we don't have to tip.
So I'm not gonna tip you so you feel more obligated to what's going on.
She's like, why should she have to tip? Because the system is
wrong and people should be able to like they decided to be in that work
environment when they could possibly be working for themselves anyway, all right, Silver
Crystal wasn't very much, you know, that's yeah, if if I'm not
antal ject, you know, that's a reasonable amount to tip a messenger if
it's like a really good message. So you know it sounds like business is
booming. Why did you laugh like that? Well, because you're an alchemist.
Like alchemist, stuff blows up, right, isn't that? Oh uh?
You know, I don't know, it's never been flammability tested. If
you test that, you can't know what She's like. Half the ship she
thought was going to go one way, and this world has gone the opposite.
It's just like maybe at this point maybe all right, So right now
Bentley and Richard are looking at going to the atheneum? What are the rest
of you doing? Can I work on a secret handshake with Taylor? Sure?
Taylor? Can I work on a secret handshake with you? Yes?
Hin, show me how it's done? Okay, Okay, So we spend
some time just kind of like, you know, doing some little hand flaps
type of things, and I feel like we get to a good you know,
how do I describe? So here's what's going to happen. Whenever you
guys want to do want to do your secret handshake, it is going to
be a skill check and the DC is going to be set by how many
how long has it been since the last time you did it, to see
if you're how to do it? So, okay, okay, elaborate.
Yeah, I feel like so maybe like a fist bump, like a top
of the fist, the bottom of the fist, finger wiggle and then pull
each other in for a little pug and then do another fist bump or something
like that. Yeah, and then Taylor, Taylor, she teaches Amy and
how to drop it a lot. You have so much flexibility in your lower
spote or in work. I mean, did you try to do it in
horse form just to see what happens? I really don't want to think about
that. I'm just imagining now like a horse working out in the field.
All right, So are we going to see Montiaca as well today or do
you want to talk more about like I suppose that's a good point. So
maybe maybe while Richard and Bentley are off going to the library hand in hand,
we can talk about like the real the real work that needs to be
done here, ladies, we're the ones that are really in charge, in
charge because she's got her own little everybody, I'm playing both sides no matter
who, Okay, America. So yeah, I don't know we should we
try new recount kills or should we wait till we till they get back?
Like what do we what do we need to do? Because I know we
have some allies in prison. I know we're we got to find a thing.
We got to find another thing for Crystal her phone. And I don't
know what the next step is for that, Like is do we need to
be somewhere at a certain time or something for her next lawyer thing. Well,
if you remember, the Lord Protector of Lavern said he was going to
try to pull some strings about the soul. Oh okay, okay, oh
yeah, and we have to kill her, Yes, that's important. Can
I have to kill her? I don't remember to saying like that was a
requirement. That's just what we were leaning towards. He just wants her to
no longer be his problem. I see, I see. Okay, now,
no, killing her would satisfy that condition. But it just doesn't require
killing her. Okay, it doesn't as far as this group is concerned.
Yeah, and it requires that. It's good. I'm happy. It's such
a burden, I know. But now I want to figure out how long
it's going to take me to fill this order. And like, I have
a bunch of potions from the last one, and I need to start figuring
out who's going to start being fetching. I can't just keep making. So
so he you notice skipping around like time, skipping while and make Yeah,
so you notice that the order is not asking you to make anything. It
is asking you for the raw ingredients to be delivered to the crow's nest.
That's interesting. Do you think he started his own shop over there. I
think making stuff in house. I don't know. Or maybe he wants me
to make them like greatly ingredients and then show him how to make them mess
Oh but maybe hey, you know, there's those goblins in the back of
his house, but like the that place. Yeah, then I bet you've
got some. I think we could put those folks to work doing this instead
of doing their day job. It's probably less stinky. Maybe they would they
like it stinky. I don't want to pretend like I know what their lives
are like when I don't. People come to work for me because they want
to improve their lives. I don't want to make someone's life actually worse,
says the owner of the mL. So, yeah, I guess we can't.
I can't collect them. I think I shouldn't be too hard, because
what do you think out of Like on the side, Alex, do you
think it'd be hard to get the ingredients in the list? I don't think
it would be too difficult, but the whole thing would come off as weird
to you. The particular requests. Okay, it does well, yeah it
does seem. Yes, Sending a goblin with the list of supplies for things.
I didn't even am I having to do this guy's grocery shopping. I
know. I was like, does he think you're a task rabbit? I
don't know. We'll meet with him and then get the ingredients, I think.
Okay, see it all right, So you guys are headed to the
Crow's Nest, and then Richard and Bentley are heading to the Atheneum, right
in the initial order for it. Okay, when then I meet at the
hotel. Yeah, we'll assume you picked that up on the way. Yeah,
okay, So Bentley, you and Richard make it back over to the
Athenium. Uh, you find it just as beautiful as the last time you
left. As you're walking through the quad, you see there's even like a
squirrel building like rebuilding his house in the in the tree the h and you
find, uh, you find a building labeled Oh, I had a name
for it, but it's basically the library. I don't want to try and
track down that word duck libra the librarium. Yeah, it seems accurate,
and uh, cam is really cool. We've totally been here before and have
this name right, yes. Uh. And as you step inside, you
see this massive, massive, Florida ceiling bookshelves with ladders, like rolling ladders
that are probably five stories tall. Like this place is is almost more ornamental
than unit than useful, if it makes sense, like it's it's almost like
it was specifically built to look pretty and then maybe function as a library.
And you see a a rather old looking elf sitting behind the front desk,
and he looks up from his book that he's levitating in front of him,
and he says, hello, May I help you? Yes, I was
wondering if there was a section for paladin spells paladins. Yes, if you
look, there's a towards the back, there is a section labeled religious studies
that may be to your liking. All right, cool, thanks, I'm
just gonna ignore the fact that the dude said like a douchebag about asking for
her location somewhere. What about you, my little friend? And then that's
true, Thank you, Bentley, And thank you also for giving me a
piggyback right here. So I got a little bit stronger to the feeling.
The feeling you get is he saw you like piggyback riding on him, and
then as he gets closer, he goes, oh, oh, you're a
No, I thought you were a small child. I am my apologies.
Just to be clear, we are friendly to all kinds here, big and
small. Well, I would one would, sure hope. So in such
a place of knowledge easy except for goblins. They they chew on the books
and that is not allowed. I can imagine that that would be That would
make your job very difficult. Yeah, so my friend here is looking for
Paladin things. I'm actually looking for some stuff for bards. Bards bards what
yes, But what kind of bard are you? I don't know. I
have this weird like creation like I just want to, you know, create
things, but I have no medium to do so with. Interesting Perhaps something
in the do with Yourself section. Okay, that sounds like pretty good.
I think I can find something from there. So uh yeah, you're you.
You go searching and you find uh, you find all kinds of books
on various different Bardic bardic feats of creativity perfect, and then Bentley, you
find the religious section and you notice it. It's like it's kind of dark
back there, and it's very dusty, looks like it probably hasn't been hasn't
been utilized in a while. As you're searching through you see a book,
it feels like it almost glimmers, like in a video game when something's important.
Yep, this is calling my name. Take the book and I open
it up immediately. So the book is called The Tale of the Seeker.
Ooh, and as you flip through it, you see a lot of words
in it you recognize that reference things from the real world. And hidden within
its pages you find a bell titled find Vehicle. Nice. Okay, I
immediately like take over of the spell and like feel I feel like calling him,
like, I bet I could do this as you as you read,
you realize what it can do. So Richard is a quick question, are
we like level five now? Like do I have my yes? Yes,
okay, you're absolutely level five now, okay, perfect. So Richard is
going to find Bentley in the library. He's like, oh, hey,
buddy, did you find anything cool? Yeah, let's go outside. That's
something cool to tray, all right. And and so when Bentley kind of
like looks up to see Richard, Richard is now tall again, he like
looks like he used to look what the No need to take this offline overworked
and underplayed. We'll circle back after these messages, all right, and that's
a good time to cut away to the other group. So you guys managed
to make it back to the hotel, pick up the potions you made,
and then you are entering the Seafarers district. As you enter, it feels
weird. There's not nearly as much activity going on at the docks as you're
used to, and you see a lot of just empty crates stacked up on
the docks themselves. As you get closer and closer to the Crow's Nest,
it begins getting louder and louder, And when you finally do get to the
Crow's Nest, the exterior is mostly recognizable, but the massive stacks of crates
and other shipping materials are not, and you can tell through the like just
as you're walking up there is a flurry of activity going on inside the building.
Wow, open here, How long were we gone? Geez? Is
this all from mine down? Is this? My dunlight? Are we what's
happening? What is Are there any folks around, like vague rins or anybody
around we could ask what's going on? So you do a quick scan and
you see a couple of fishermen kind of sitting on a bench passing a nondescript
brown bottle back and forth. Okay, hey you hey, why the de's
someone around here? It's usually super busy. Well, some person came through
here and they ruined everything. He says, we had, so it was
it was like nothing to find people to work your ship, to go do
some fishing and various other seafaring activities. But now we can hardly find anybody
who wants to work anymore. Hey, guys, I think there is the
minimum wage. Ah, I'm they took her jerbsmssion based because this ship like
this can happen, uh he says. Uh, he says, yeah,
some un over here started selling some discount potions. Next thing, you know,
everybody and their brother has bought into this whole scheme. Uh oh wow,
Well, dang it, that kind of sucks. Sorry, that's going
to suck for everybody else when there's no fish to eat. Crystal, I
think that maybe Captain Montyac has been incredibly successful. I think so too,
maybe too maybe too successful, because isn't this initial problem that the Lord Protector
wants us to fix? I mean, what is it? You know,
like this is this is just a transitional phase, right, So is it.
I don't know. Everyone all on board, it's fine. Is that
a joke? Because we're in the docks on board? I know, I
never know with you know, a bentleyon Richard, I never know what's a
joke and what's not. So well, you don't have to worry about that
with us, I mean, we really know what's going on. I agree,
So I guess we'll walk on into the Christmas let's see. Okay,
So, as you guys open the door, I need you all to make
a constitution saving throw. I got a fifteen, I got a ten,
twenty four. Okay, so the fifteen and the twenty four rock solid.
As you guys open the door, just a cloud of fumes bursts out from
the difference in temperature and everything from inside versus outside and crystal You are temporarily
like blinded and coughing as the the noxious fumes hit you. The other the
other two of you see a flurry of activity inside as all manner of Goblin,
gnome and humans are working away at what appeared to be almost comically fantasized
versions of like beakers and flasks and what have you. As they are mixing
different substances and you see one very flustered Captain Montiac at the back of the
room, yelling back and forth, directing the chaos. Oh my god,
my eyes are watering. Whenn't the hat Crystal? Are you okay? No,
I cannot see on my hand, And well there's Montiac. Talk to
him as you guys enter. Captain Montiac looks up and he goes, oh,
thank heavens you have arrived, and he comes running over. He goes,
Crystal, I need you, I need some insight quickly. Have you
have you been able to gather the ingredients? You told me that if I
needed anything, to reach out to you and you would get it for me.
Oh so, I didn't recognize some of the things that you put on
the list. And I have all of these orders that I fulfilled for you
the other day, and I wanted to bring them by to anyway. So
can you walk me through what's going on? What is happened? But you
brought these the other day? He says, yes, you came here,
you brought me the orders, and then you gave me these new ingredients for
something. This one is kind of a weird one. It's called Let's get
jazzed. Oh my gosh, when did this happen? When did this happen?
I know you can't see anything, Crystal, this happened like three days
ago. Where were we three days ago? Not here, that's for sure.
Were we in Cork? Was? Where was I using our lucy goosey
form of of time? Uh? That would have been during your deposition?
Oh my gosh, there was an impostor corporate sabotage? What are you talking
about? No, she was here. I saw her with my own two
eyes, telling you, But did I have the same color hairs? Was
I have the same height? And yes, I know what colors are?
You were nice to? Nice to you? Uh? Actually more so than
usual. But I've just been at your first clue was that? Crystal?
I don't know you're nice to who? Do you? I have saved your
rear end so many times that you're not nice. You're not usually nice to
him though you didn't know his name when they questioned about I think these fumes
are maybe like making us all a little uh woozy or something. Can we
talk outside? Oh? Oh here here, use this one. This one
is a calming effect. And he pulls out another another vial. No,
I think what we're trying to tell you is that there was an impostor,
and that's not These are not Crystal's recipes, So we need to resolve this
post taste. What did you call it? What did what did you call
this potion? Let's get jazzed? So Crystal wants to take her little like
because she feels like she's been sabotaged and because she's worried that what's going to
happen is or her new downline is going to be given contaminated products. She
takes her little detect poison fingernail polished fingers and she's gonna dip them in the
potion. Okay, so uh so the let's get jazzed. It doesn't really
detect this poison. Okay. So it's not like she's so it's not like
the ingredient list contains anything. Even if you look over the list, you
don't see anything that is inherently toxic if ingested properly. Okay, that's a
big relief, Like she just doesn't want people getting like, yeah, it's
a nightmare, Like what she's going through right now is nightmare enough. What
she doesn't want is like homicide on her hands. So wait, you're saying
there was some sort of imposta. How could that be possible? She looked
just like you, she spoke just like you. Kind of this is a
little kinder than usual. But I don't understand. Okay, neither do I
quite frankly, I do not understand. How how Why are there two of
me in two different forms? Why are we you sure it wasn't you?
Okay, yes, I mean to grab the shoulders of Montiac and shake him.
You're being had outside. I am not hysterical, but I have been
awake for three days straight now, and and if we don't fell disorder,
there's going to be a riot in the city that we've already taken payment.
Do you not have the gold I gave you? No shit? So we
know that this person already has she shifting abilities because she looks like what Crystal
used to look like, so it makes sense that she would also be able
to impersonate current Crystal state. And now she knows what I look like mm
hmm, and what you sound like. And now she has a lot of
gold running around with she already had. Why why does she need pine like?
Okay, what we're gonna do is Crystal is going to spend some time
going through these recipes of these orders, and she's going to perfect them,
make them better, and like figure it out all out. And then she's
gonna go get ingredients and she's gonna fill these orders because these are her downline
and she doesn't want her brand being tarnished. And then she's going to address
whatever the fuck is going on with this stupid shape shifter, crystal impersonator,
identity, theft her person rebrand the names. So I'm gonna say it's easy
enough for you to like make some improvements on it, because you look at
the when you look at the recipes, you're like, what kind of amateur
hour stuff is this? But so that's gonna be easy enough. After a
little while, Captain Montiac goes and he takes a nap, and he comes
back in like forty five minutes, and he's like, oh, that feels
so much better. He says, I had a thought, if there is
truly some sort of impostor going on, it could be any of us.
Right, So how do I know you're not impostas and you're not trying to
trick me? I slap them across the face. You're a hyptacle for five
minutes. How do we know that you're not also an impostor? Right now?
How do I know I'm not an impostor? You need? You wouldn't
probably know, you would know if you're an impostor? Right What if?
What if all of this isn't even real? Okay, Crystal? What is
in these oils? You see? Is he? He just wonders. How
he goes, I'm I'm going to go sleep for a little longer, and
he takes a bottle of whiskey off of the bar and heads back to bed.
That's perfect, And Crystal is going to sort all this out. She
is going to rename all of the ones to other names so that they're not
whatever, like, yeah, they're not directly Church of Clarity related, okay,
because it's just going to give her freaking more ammunition for this stupid trial
when she like, if we're passing on like, he's not affiliated with the
church, and so it's going to give her more trouble in the long run.
If she's actively selling products at the Church of Clarity with names that the
Church of Clarity uses, it's gonna make her look extra guilty. So we
still haven't You still haven't made any money either from this enterprise. I think
a little bit when we first came back and realized that money was kidding successful.
Look, look, you took a pre well I guess an asterisk,
pre industrial society and gave them ibuprofen. I'm just saying, like, do
you know what that would do to people? Yeah, you went back to
the to the like eighteen twenties and you gave people like a bottle of IBus
profen. Yeah. Crazy, but with all of these other ones. So
now she's got her list and she's how long I mean, like, I
don't know how long it's gonna take her, but she's pretty proficient, so
it shouldn't take her a lot. Yeah, I'm gonna say, you're you're
able to sort this whole thing out in an afternoon. Like I feel like
as she's done, she's also like you can feel the air quality going way,
way, way better. Yeah, she goes and cracks a window,
Like, guys, just one window and this whole thing would be so much.
And as you do that, and like the cloud starts to clear out
of the room. You see there's like two or three gnomes that are just
passed out on a table. I mean the whole point of this was to
make them more productive of their jobs. And now like freaking fake crystal is
just like killing the productivity branding. Like instead of people working longer and staying
where they're supposed to, they're trying to improve their lives. How dare they?
All? Right? So it's about that time I believe Bentley and Richard
would be showing back up and Bentley, when you arrive back outside of the
crow's nest, what what should what? What does the rest of the party
hear or see? First? Yeah, they hear the sound of a very
loud engine for the first time in a while as a large Toyota Tacoma and
Spiritual farm shows up. It's gotten as you look. It's jacked up a
bit. It's got a brushguard on the front. It's got like a dragon's
head on the hood, breathing fire that somehow looks like it's brighter than the
rest of the paint job. That's like brass dragon scales on the back.
It's got like a pop up camper on the back. Because we show up
in a fine vehicle, as I ritual cast it, I'm like, this
is fucking awesome. Let's go. Richard and Richard's I can don't forget to
tell them that I have permanent shotgun. Yeah, yeah, yeah, just
for you, buddy. Does it have a Bentley? Does it have a
LaBamba horn or anything? No? No, no, no does it?
He hanks the horn and just says, hello it t Yeah, it's the
the it crowd. Guy. I love it. I love it. Wow
ride Yeah, I have no idea where this book came from, but it's
amazing and it lasts for ten hours, so we could technically sleep in these
things. So let's got a camper on the back like all of us.
Sure, I don't actually know. I think it's bigger on the inside.
Yeah. So so, just because I'm a firm believer in the rule of
cool, when I think it's like really cool, I'm going to say that
the the because it's a magical truck and a magical camper, that the camper
shell, when deployed, is going to function like a Liamid's tiny hut.
And I'm gonna say it, you get like a celestial vibe because it's like
it's a religion. It's a Paladine spell. So it's tied to the brash
dragon. So total whose name totally. Is it ripped from Skyrim? Does
that? Does that mean that like it always looks like it's had a fresh
paint job and it's got like a shine to it, Yes, all right,
not a fresh paint job, fresh clean, Yeah, Unorly the spell
specifically says non military, Otherwise it would totally have a repeating crossbow on top
of it would have been a technical Well that's something we have a way of
traveling though. Yeah, without a horse carriage. Oh, Tylor, it's
probably nice to not have to do all the lake Have you lived anymore?
Tailor now understands how people feel when Ai replaces their jobs, speaking of they
took her jobs. Oh my god, I'm sure you can fit in here.
Maybe not in horse warm with our new Toyota Tacoma. Would it have
taken us less than ten minutes to get here from the library? Oh yeah,
because it's a two minute right Oh wait? Actually actually yeah? And
also you'd have to go pretty slow, considering all the roads are made for
horse carts. Frustrating that. That's what I'm hearing is it goes faster offer
possibly country miles, that's why, and has nice wheels. I started to
put spikes on the wheels, but that seemed a little excessive. So it's
a It's about that time. As you guys are quote unquote admiring Bentley's new
ride, you see as Captain montiac, who looks very refreshed now after having
another three hours of sleep, steps outside and he says, I had another
thought, this doppel ganger of yours, Crystal, I think I know someone
who might be able to help you. There is a witch. There's a
witch on the outside of the outskirts of the city, Lilith. She is
a bit of a fortune teller. She might be able to give you some
kind of insight into what exactly is going on. You know, like I
just am like pretty, I'm pretty. I've seen one horror movie in my
life, and that seems pretty dangerous going to the edge of the woods meeting.
Yeah, so Captain Montiau says this to you. Then he turns and
he goes, good, heavens, what does that? Oh? Oh,
are we seeing it for the first time too, or I'm talking about Bentley's
truck. He's like, what does that? It's a cool travel vehicle.
You wouldn't be very interested. He goes up, he goes, what manner
of beast? Is this the technological kind? I must learn more of this
technology? You are fascinating people. Wait, so what's this about a doppelganger?
Richard says, So apparently there's a third meet or the fake Crystal is
pretending to be me. Now, maybe we could switch places and I can
get my name back. You're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna freaky Friday
here. But yeah, I know she she came here and she took my
freaking down line. Again. I don't understand how that's possible, how she
can fuck me up? He twice, But here we are. She apparently
looks just like me now. But apparently it happened during our depositions, so
there's no way that it could have been me and this poor guy here monioc,
he's just like that is what said? She left in Mahyadra. Yeah,
so terrible. It didn't even work. Yes, he said, I'm
out like nine thousand gold right now waiting on product. Oh so much money.
That's serious? Yeah? Is that we maybe we could turn that in
our favor. How So, first Richard is like, well, one,
check out this new thing that I learned, and like, does some magic
stuff. He like looks he moves his monocle around and he's like all press
is good press and crystal. He like focuses in on her sun classes And
then so she now looks like her old self. She looks like the human
not the drow whoa, she's like what she like lifts up for sunglasses to
see. Does anything happen? Not? It is still you are You are
still blinded, like the sun is is is still painful to you look at
her to see she can't even see. So, yeah, so this only
lasts for about ten minutes, and I got to really make sure I'm thinking
about it the whole time. It doesn't it's not permanent or anything like that.
But maybe if we can get you in the right place, looking like
the right person, then we can, you know, do something with that.
And if if they've taken all of the potions and he's out of money,
maybe we can refocus who they're mad at. Maybe because you know,
you going yeah, but like weren't you like, wasn't this like club clarity
because you had to be away from the church, Maybe we can like twist
it away. So there's like all the people that are angry that they're not
going to get their supply because you know, we're not going to be able
to fill this order. Like well, Surprise Club Clarity was actually an offshoot
of the church. They were trying to expand into the ducular thing. I
like it, let's do that. And now there's an angry mob going after
her and we don't have to do as much and in the confusion we get
the phone exactly. Yeah. Wow, you just made an entire opportunity person.
Wow, look at you. You are the brains of the operation there
is I just had to spend some time in the library. I guess a
gratitude today keeps the haters away. And that's why we want to thank you
for listening to Overworked and Underplayed. You just heard Alex Capps as our DM
Anelin, Hardy is Taylor Jacobs, Katie is Crystal two point zero, Marjorie
is Amy Ann, Marcel, Hardy is Richard Cox, and Tyler is Bentley.
Episodes are edited by Marcel and circle back episodes are edited by Katie.
We hope you enjoyed it and we'll circle back in two weeks on July eleventh
for the next episode. You can help us to get the word out by
rating, reviewing, and subscribing wherever you listen to podcast. You can also
follow us on social at own up pod that's o w n U p p
o D, subreddit, R slash own up. This is magical technology.
It's definitely a four wheel drive yourself