Hey, it's Tuesday, July the fifth, twenty sixteen. You're listening to
the Giant bomb cast. Our nation is now two hundred and forty years old.
Yeah, happy birthday. Yay America America. Yeah, to celebrate.
Drew and Jason have gotten the hell out of here. That's right, they've
escaped. I don't know where they went. We don't. We don't know
where they go. Drew's probably outside of America, America, drews. Drew's
on a secret op. Yeah, Jason sticks around. Jason's in Florida,
which I'm not sure if that qualifies. Part of it is either part of
America, like not part of America or the most America. I know it's
not the most. No, no, no, I mean, what are
your criteria? Boy, that's a question. Tell me what defines Americanness to
you. I'm gonna regrets Florida, that's all right, Will Smith? What's
America? I was in Jersey over over the weekend. I thought Jersey was
pretty America. Okay, all right, that makes sense, honest genuine people,
which everyone always shits on Jersey all the time. I've sent thirty years
hearing that. Like the wrestling bad guys saying, oh, if this was,
if America was, but this is where he'd stick to Anima or whatever.
H No, I feel like, wow, that's wow, that's where
you. They said that about every stop on the tour though. That's not
just Columbus, Ohio. It was also the Nima place. No, you
just people shoot on Jersey all the time. It was great a thing.
It's it's the classic. Okay, I heard there's bad parts. I heard
Camden is bad, but where it's been Vinny's in Newark, Vinney seems a
like here, right, I mean I don't know anything. Yeah, yeah,
it reminded me weirdly of Kansas. It was like quaint, suburban,
just nice people saying hi to each other on the streets. Can't pump your
own gas? Really that was weird. Yeah, you cannot pump gas in
Jersey. Yeah, I like that. We didn't actually do that, but
but I heard that, like it's a weird law. Yep. I don't
understand that at all. I don't. I don't either. Somebody yelled at
me for pumping my gas in Oregan one time, Like a guy came running
out of the gas station as if his pants were on fire. Yeah,
I tried pumping gas in Jersey, and yes, the guy was not thrilled
about it. That might be a nice law, though, because my sister
and I'm sure other people have done this, just broke their car by filling
it with diesel fuel. Wow it doesn't fit though, doesn't And no it
doesn't. They purposely make the hole so you can't put diesel fuel in there.
So I think she just squirted the diesel fuel into the hole and ruined
A big part of Love finds a Way. Yeah, yeah, oh yeah,
New Jersey could help that, all right, Will Smith? Yes,
sir, as a man who once saved America many times from an invading minute.
Welcome to Earth. Yes, how was your fourth child? I grilled
meat over fire. Okay, that's something that you should do. I had
some safe, insane fireworks, so check when when the people that drive to
Rena. I don't even know where you go to get illegal fireworks in twenty
sixteen in California, reallyan Francisco, really just go like you just is there
some store that you go in the Chinatown. There's a store that's a truck.
It's like a food truck, but for fireworks. Really, and they've
been operating it for decades. Like, yeah, you can get that stuff
here. I mean yeah, okay, you can get anything here. It's
a big city. Okay, what what is what is the state of fireworks
legality in California? Like, can you county the county stuff a real city
by city? Yeah, yeah, merin county it is all illegal. They
will still have like city run fireworks shows and stuff, but the county it's
a dry county. Uh. In Sonoma County where I'm at, you can
buy fireworks, but they're the shitty California fireworks, which is what I'm It's
it's you know, ground flowers and fountains of fire. Nothing that fire fires
into the sky, nothing that lows up, no black powder. Yeah,
except for in the snappers. So you're throwing it at each other there.
Yeah, that's a good time. Pacific where I live, home of the
world's greatest taco bell. I was just there a week or two ago.
Interesting, it was great. It's it's a nice taco bell. Yeah.
They basically it's it's like Baghdad in nineteen ninety one. Remember when you saw
those videos on CNN. I'm all the lights going up. Yeah, it's
basically like that it's got heavy an hour before it gets dark until two o'clock
in the morning. One o'clock in the morning. Did the statue get pulled
down at any point, then, okay, that's the next year. It
was like I had Gary brought his daughter over and we kept them up three
or four hours after bedtime, and at one point they were both chasing each
other around the backyard screaming, I love fireworks, I love fireworks. I
love fireworks more fireworks. So that was my night. People down on the
beach with that stuff, like you guys are pretty close to the water.
The people mostly just go out in the street because the role in Pacifica is
if the cop doesn't see you light the fuse, then they can't ticket you.
So they have all these signs that say thousand dollars fine for legal fireworks,
but nobody ever gets fine because you know, one guy stands at the
end of the street and says cop and then they stop lighting fuses and and
you know, sit there with their fake say anyway, I've never felt more
inadequate as a father when there's when there's fireworks that are going up in the
sky and like filling half the sky. Yeah, it's sparkles that make more
sparkles, that make more sparkles, and we have like a couple of sparklers
in our hands. Like, look, these are really cool kids, Like
daddy, that firework better than yours. You got a storm slow. Yeah.
Someone blew their leg off in Central Park this weekend trying to make their
own fireworks, like jumped off a rock and blew up this thing. Like
he lit this thing and tried to like jump off a rock and blew his
own leg off. You see. You see a lot of thumbs every year.
But man, leg leg iso, that's you have to that's some serious
ordinance of that. Yeah, what are you doing? That's balls? He
sent for park is surrounded by a lot of places filled out the woods really
yeah yeah, yeah, well you know it's fourth of July. You just
gotta do what you gotta do. Now. I had a friend who liked
to make his own fireworks, which is a fun way to say, make
pipe bombs. Wow, And those were always cool, I don't know,
like super fucked up, but you know, he dropped in the sewer and
hope for the best. We would just do the thing where we would buy
like two hundred dollars worth of fireworks, put it in a cardboard box,
just drive out to some farm. I mean, wasn't harden cans. It
is just going ten minutes in any direction. And then we'd doused it in
like lighter fluid or gasoline, and then we would all farm Roman candles at
it. No, no, just the box of fireworks. Yeah yeah.
And then so it would be like, you know, one, hundreds and
hundreds of bottle rocks and Roman candles playing in every different direction. And then
we would get really far away and shoot Roman candles at the box, and
once one of the little things hit it, it would look like a mushroom
cloud, like twenty feet tall. Yeah, it's amazingly bad idea. Oh
yeah. And then once it dives down a little bit, y'all dare each
other to go jump over it. That's always fun. You're perfect. Yeah,
this is how the door Win Awards got started. The Door Win Awards.
Oh right, right, yeah, yeah, yeah. Now. My
dad used to be big on getting the fireworks you're not supposed to get in
California, and we would launch them off. So I at an early age
I got way into them. And then at some point I think he realized
that he was going to burn down the neighborhood if if this like kept escalating,
and he kind of backed off of it, and I was like,
no, fuck that we got no what do we know? What when are
we gonna get the good fireworks brought block Pride? Yeah exactly. And yeah,
So we ended up moving to a court, which was nice because we
lived pretty close to the police station before, which maybe in retrospect between you
know, like we were landing things on people's roofs and ship and it's like,
yeah, a couple times he'd be like, we need go inside now.
I'm like, all right, run inside for like ten minutes to come
back out. All right, Okay, let's go in the front room in
the street or in the back street. Yeah, okay, yeah, and
yeah, I don't know. The last year we did anything crazy in the
street, it was take one of the fountains that they sell for real and
just pack it full of actual gunpowder, and that just I feel like I've
told the story before, but it just led to like a twenty foot flame
in the middle of the street for about ten seconds, and it sounded like
a jetts like a jet that sounds all right, and it was awesome.
It was like he we ran a separate fuse from like it tied it to
the real fuse and ran it around to the bottom of the thing where we
had packed all this stuff in and it was great. It was it was
it lit up. It was like daytime out there for that those twenty seconds.
So I was like, oh, this is great. I'd get a
tan and then it was just fucking, utter, abject darkness and we went
inside and that was it for us with fireworks, because at that point there
was, you know, there was nothing else to be done. And I
was old enough to go out and get into my own own trouble at that
point, so I did. H Yeah. So I didn't know this,
but out here, like where Brad and I grew up, they have muzzle
loading like black powder hunting season, right, So there's a period of time
everywhere eyear where you go out and you literally you go to hunt deer with
guns. You pour black powder into the back and put the shot or whatever
and jam a stick down there, and like you can just go to the
gun shop and buy a black powder or whenever you want it. So we
used to you, is it to like blow up stumps, you'd go drill
a hole and then you know, put the put the black power in the
fuse and put some like epoxy or something in there to hold alder. You
need the pressure to make it blow up. Yeah, and light the fuse
and then run like hell and hope that the wood trappinell didn't kill anybody.
And so a few years ago, for something we were doing on tested,
we needed black powder. So I just went to the gun shop down around
the corner from my house, as one does, and walked in. And
you know it's the normal. You've been to a gun shop before, Yes,
I have seen, right, there's a certain there's a certain a certain
look. Yeah, for the and like I do not fit lumber stickers,
but not on cars, but in the windows type of place. And GTA,
is that what gun traps look like? Are those accurate? It's not
two? I mean that is camo? Yeah, okay you could yeah,
sure. Have you ever been in a kmart that's not a kmart anymore?
Like gout shut down, but the shelves are still in there. Yes,
it usually looks like that, but with guns on the wall instead of nothing.
Okay? Yeah, And and there's guys in there. There's a lot
of people wearing camo, and then there's also some guy that's wearing tack clothes,
but it's the top usually. Yeah, it's just like this man is
dressed in all black, but it's clearly not a police officer. Yeah.
So I walked in with my stupid internet T shirt and pair of like skinny
jeans, and the guy's buying the counter immediately made me as like, you
know, not the short place sized you up. And I walked back to
the counter and I was like, hey, can we help you with something.
I was like, yeah, I just need to get some some black
powder, and just the silence the whole place. The ship stopped in the
whole gun store and everybody kind of turns around and looks and they're like,
we don't sell black powder here, son, And I said, well really.
They're like no, it's so you can't just buy black powder in California.
It's you gotta go blah blah blah, you have permits and all that.
And I was like, oh shit, I just you know, and
I told I like went through the whole thing. I was like, I'm
from Tennessee. He's just go with the gun store get at Walmart whatever,
and and well we got some pamphlets if you want to help us here in
California, calling the special number on the other line, like the yeah,
this guy's about to go crazy and blow up as school or whatever. So
I went. I ended up having to go to the special place and getting
the black powder there. Nevada. No, that's in Burlin game. Okay,
all right, yeah, okay, yeah, so yeah, you can't
get black powder here. Really it's hard. Ye who knew? Who would
you just like provide id and all that sort of stuff. Yeah, a
letter and like go talk to the ship. It ended up being such a
pain in the ass that I just we just didn't do it. Yeah.
Yeah. Do you think anyone around here attached fireworks or Roman candles or anything
to drones and flew them up in the air and like steered him around and
shot him. I've seen the Roman candle on a drone before, So that's
a real dumb idea. That's not all right. Fire fire and lithium ion
batteries is not a go. It depends how much you care about the drone
or raining down toxic smoke and ship that burns when it comes gets water this
doesn't this also doesn't sound bad enough. Yeah, no, I feel like
maybe this was the first year, maybe last year, but this was I
feel like I saw a whole lot of people shooting fireworks with drones, like
using like flying drones around fireworks shows, Like maybe just the proliferation of these
things shooting them. I've never quite understood the people that are taking video of
an entire fireworks show, Like when, at what point in your life are
you actually gonna watch that? Again, it's technic like a picture or two
of the fireworks exploding, but like the entire duration of it as a video.
Yeah, same people like a concerts, like you know you're in the
first row filming Bruce Springsteen or something like why are just watch the show that
you paid one hundred dollars to see? Kind of a secret old man,
aren't you? Well, I mean I think there's a point here, right,
Yeah, yeah, that's a picture or two to commemorate the thing,
but like if you've got your phone in front of the entire and also I
am a secret old man, yeah yeah, but yeah, when are you
gonna watch that? It's gonna be there will be a professionally shot footage if
you want to watch a fireworks show, maybe even that fireworks show, there's
probably a better way to watch it. Yeah, like people are wrestling events,
like, okay, there are pro level cameras filming this exact thing from
great angles. If you ever want to watch it again, don't film from
your stupid seats in section one seed. If people weren't doing that, then
that time that Titus O'Neil grab Vince McMahon would have been lost to time.
No, that was on the actual prodcast, but they could they faded if
you want to watch if there's like a larger, better shot of live on
the network was ok yeah, yeah there was, there was that, but
also but I feel like there was also cell phone camera of that too.
While we're being grabby old man. I was flipping channels last night and ended
up on a fourth of July concert and the girl on stage was getting everybody
in the audience to show their support by turning on the flash lights on their
iPhone and holding them. Yeah that's why. Yeah, that's that's bummed out.
For years, it's been yeah, turn on your phone screen or the
light on it was it was specifically it was the lights this time, and
the screen. Did that at the skinnered concert, you'd probably get your asskicks
lights. I was not. I was just looking at this. I was
like, nobody in that audience has a lighter on them. This is if
if it's an outdoor skinnered concert, then I bet you get a mix.
But an indoor they're gonna be like, no one's gonna plut aucking lighter and
light. It degenerates. Okay, maybe somebody see I've walked through this.
Yeah, yeah, did you get up to anything on the fourth? No?
Nothing, Now it just wasn't I don't know's it's if I'm not gonna
like go actually destroy things, I might as well not go at all.
Like the safe and sane fireworks that's for when you have kids. It's sad,
you know. So at some points are sad. Yeah, no,
they're just three, they're boring. Yeah, all rights, cool, there's
no there's no danger, there's no fun totally. Yeah. And I'm even
where I'm like, I'm not really into the danger that much. So,
And you know, I think most of my hoodlum friends have gotten to a
point where they're in a similar situation where they're just like, yeah, you
know, yeah, I could go break all these laws and get all these
fireworks and do all this stuff. But at some point enough people around me
are doing it that if I want to look up at the sky and see
it, I can. It's not you know, I don't know any outside
stuff this weekend, get up to anything. Yeah, yeah, I went
around. I went on a hike, did some stuff, went around.
It's Marine County business. Uh, hung out, generally kept it quiet.
Okay, any inside a business. I don't talk about that on this podcast.
Okay, all right, it's highly personal. That's fair, really fucked
up. Even ask I beat that game, Brad, Yeah, me too.
You played it? I played beat it this morning. Oh wow,
oh man, you're fresh. Yeah. We probably shouldn't say anything about Vague.
I thought I thought it was gonna be out on Steam today, but
I guess it's Thursday, what I thought it. Yeah, So, so
anybody waiting on PC still hasn't had a chance to play it yet, So
I guess we still need to be vague. But how are you feeling about
it? I the thing that they do with the way they teach you to
play the game is amazing. So they teach you like they present you with
this puzzle, You solve the puzzle, and then they go to the next
puzzle and you have to kind of break down, like the thing that you
tried that you did to solve the last puzzle doesn't work on this one.
But it's like one access off. You have to look at the whole state
of the room that you're in, everything that's accessible to you, and you're
like, oh, why is this why why is there a ramp over here?
Oh? Right, okay, so you use you have to use this
ramp. And they do a really good job of kind of teaching you experientially
without ever really showing you how to play. That's that's a good point because
they were there were like three or four major puzzles in that game where I
got to it and looked at like, you know, you you assess the
situation and you're like, Okay, what are the like the points of interaction
here that I can fiddle with? And there kind of aren't any, and
I'm like, well, what the hell do you want me to do?
And then you realize that the solutions are like often very minimal. Well they're
much more minimalist than it's it's not a lot of like different duhikis that you
got to pull around and stuff. It's like there are some elements of the
Witness that do that sort of thing as well as it's kind of showing you
stuff. Is it? Is it like that or so the Witness actually shows
you though, So the Witness has those teaching puzzles on the sequence, right,
and this does it, This does it. This is kind of the
inverse of that, right, So this it just puts you in a situation,
lets you figure out how to get out of it, and that teaches
you got to play it. But whereas the Witness ran each one of those
things into the ground as it went further and further on, right, this
one you really only do each one. Like It's an incredible amount of work
to do to build this game the way they did, I think, because
each each like encounter is its own kind of one off thing. Yeah,
they're they're super elegant and well designed. But what I mean is like there
are a lot of these puzzles where it's not like, oh, I need
to pull this box or throw a lever or something. It's like I can
subtly kind of manipulate the physics of the game to make something happen in a
way that I didn't think I could. Yeah, I felt like overall though,
it was easier than Limbo, Like I didn't think I think I could.
I could see that. Yeah, I didn't get really stuck at any
point. I don't remember Limbo having these like total mind bidding, Like the
Witness had puzzles that I would stare out for like thirty minutes. Sure,
what the hell do I do here? Sure, but I think the Limbo
Limbo had a little harder one than Inside did. Yeah I would, I
don't. I don't feel like you ever got stuck for more than like three
to five minutes and you just kind of look at something long enough and you're
like, oh, okay, yeah they're still super clever puzzles. Yeah,
a lot. Very this has more. This is less about trial air,
and there was very much like you get stabbed out of nowhere, whole bunch
of just gotchas in that game. Yeah, that ended up pushing me away
from me. So I'm glad. I'm glad to hear this. This moving
away, This is this is a lot more thoughtful. For sure. I'm
gonna I'm I'm gonna give that a look when it hits p Yeah, I
want to see that PIEC version two that. Yeah, but that's gonna look
really nice on a big monitor. I had played about half of it when
we did the last mombcast, and that was for a while. I was
kind of like, this just feels like a kind of prettier Limbo, and
then near the end it's just like, Okay, this is this is better
like this. You had some moments that that surprised me in a way that
Limbo never did. How long has it been since you finished it? Will?
I literally like how many hours? We talk like three hours ago to
come here? Huh? So I finished it maybe nine o'clock yeah, and
nine forty maybe okay, yeah, and it's eleven thir two hours ago exactly
probably. Yeah. I mean everybody talks about the last x number of minutes
of that game. It has like a Half Life two turn. Yeah.
Yeah, but I think even before that, there's no no, no,
no, maybe I'm maybe I'm not go oh no, I'm still like the
super gravity gun. What. I don't know. Half Life two didn't really
do it for me, not neither to have like one. But but you're
right, I was thinking I have Live one. Yeah, there's no zen.
I am super curious to hear what you think of. Yeah, the
way this game plays out, even even before go ahead, I want to
see it. Oh yeah, yeah, even even before that crazy stuff late
late in the game. Like I think there's a good slow build of just
weird things happening inexplicably even before that stuff. So there's real tension like it,
Like there's bits, there's bits early on. I think you guys talked
about it last week but I can't remember, but like it does have that
thing that Limbo had where the protagonist gets killed and really gruesome horrible ways that
are kind of affecting when it happens over and over again. It's it's really
there's some explicit stuff in in the deaf animation, but the dogs and stuff
like that. Yeah, and then there's there's that water monster thing. Yes
that is just a absolute fucker. Yeah, I think one of the more
violent ones that like that pulse, Yes, yeah, I think I think
getting to that area and again algies for anybody goes and played this game yet,
but getting to that area was the moment that that game really took off
for me, where I was just like the scale and the like just the
spectacle of what was happening in that environment. There's a part where you get
to where there's like there's some unseen machinery like pulsing or thumping. Should shouldn't
okay anymore? Fine? Fine, it's just yeah, it's not like a
spoiler. It's like you have to see it to really get the effects.
Just like the the number of different ways that they added detail to this machinery
operating that make it like affect everything around you is just like seconds and none
cool, and more so than with Limbo. There were times that I just
wanted to to like see how the deaths happened, Like you just want to
try, try and fail, just to see what, Like is this door
did they build an animation for this door coming that? Oh? Yeah?
Is that snappy about getting you back in? Yeah, it's it's like three
to five seconds after you're dead, you'll and you always respond in the exact
same room that you were in. Cool. Yeah, there's there were only
like two places where the checkpoints were kind of jankie, and they had to
be because of the way the puzzles were back. Okay, yeah, so
makes sense. Yeah, but it's it feels really really deliberate and the really
awesome like it's it's much more so than Limbo. I think I haven't played
Limbo since a game like you can. You're gonna absolutely see how it took
him that long to make. There's a four hour game. It's a lot
of game. Yeah, all right, next week we'll actually talk about it
for real once everybody else has played it. Yeah, uh damn yeah.
Do you play anything else while you were on? So my girlfriend's brothers have
a lot of Jaguar and three D O and like, they have a lot
of old, weird games, and it's kind of rare for me to see
an old game that I had never even heard of or played. And that's
pretty much all I played this weekend. So I played Ultra Vortex yep.
I played some Fight for Life, though I played Escape from Monster manor Killing
Time and Unreal Tournament for Dreamcast. All right, yeah, but I had
never even heard like they had all these old Mortal Kombat knockoff from like ninety
four. We've played some Way of the Warrior and stuff like that, which
i'd heard it. I know that one. But Killing Time not Killing Time.
I Fight for Life text. So I'm trying to Ultravortex was that was
more explicitly Mortal Kombat like, and it was Fight for Life polygonal like More
Fight. I think I think Fight for Life was straight up like taking on
Virtual Fighter at the time. Okay, yes, I remember being invited to
an event to go see Fight for Life, uh, and not going,
oh yeah, yeah, it's it's real bad. Ultra Vortex is too Ultra
Vortex at the time, Like there were people on that game that I think
that Ryan McDonald knew a guy who was working on it or something, or
I forget what it was, but I remember hearing a lot about that game
when it has been in development, is being like, oh no, it's
gonna be it's gonna be super Legit isn't all of a sudden like did that
game use actors, Like were they going that hard on the more Got that
angle? Yeah, yeah, but it's all digitized stuff. And I think
even like the fatality animation is the same, just kind of like woozy standing
there waiting for an input thing. Wow, it's a yeah. I've not
played that game in a very long time, but it's I remember it being
pretty rotten. Remember both those games being pretty rotten. The characters like Screen
and Ultra Vortex is pretty cool though. It's a big demon looking back and
forth and it's handro and the players going their hands like cold knacks like Golden
Yeah yeah, kind of like that. Yeah uh and played some Alien versus
Predator. I'd never played that. Always heard about it. Jars, Yeah
that that. Yeah, that game is like always held up as like the
Jaguar game, and I've never been a fan, doesn't at an age that
well, like during the it's kind of weird and you know, it's I
just thought then. I think that was another one of those cases where if
you were playing shooters on a PC and came to that game, you were
like, Okay, I guess it's like there are things about it that are
like more complicated than a lot of other shooters and that's neat. But man,
yeah, I just thought that game, Golden I was good if you
played PC shooters, Like yeah, I mean it wasn't It wasn't quite good,
but it was like the web stuffing they did with the weapons and the
fact that you could catch it, and it was it was different. They
were they were building their own thing. It was they were taking advantage of
the controller in a way that you know, Tarrock didn't. Yeah, and
that was that was neat. But but at the same time, yeah,
I don't know, like just the speed of it and all that, I
still wanted you play real shooters on a PC. Were any of those Alien
Versus Predator games ever good? People really like like the ones of the game
years later the Yeah, it wasn't lift Tech, but I didn't Monolithic one.
I feel like, I feel like there have been eight different games that
just have the title Alien Versus Predator, right, And I can't straight Yes,
those games were super well liked when they were on PC h but I
think it was the same deal where I just came down like I if maybe
if you really like Aliens and or Predators, you're willing to kind of overlook
some stuff. But I just I don't know. The one everybody seems to
remember is it came out around like two thousand nish two thousand something like that,
the Sega made one and like oh nine somewhere around there that was not
good and wasn't good played. Yeah that was yeah, Yeah, that was
a different kind of a different thing when they were kind of three different games
like the one I think I played the Lift Tech one, which was three.
It was three because it was a marine side there was a you could
beat the alien and like climb on the wall. Also, okay, yeah,
it's a lot of like opening a door as a marine and there's an
alien. I'm gonna walk straight backwards and shoot my shotgun for a while,
and then to walk forward I have to take damage because it left a pool
of acid on the ground. So if you killed in a doorway and then
to strap ie, you can either hold in se and move left or right,
or the dumb like number pad on the bottom. Yeah, what would
you think of that control? It was. I never actually held one,
you know, I never had a Jaguar, and it always looked like this
big, heavy, expensive piece of machinery and then you hold it and it
feels so light and cheap. But yeah, her brother was telling me about
like the inserts or whatever the cards you would put over. It was like
it was like the in television invision, right, like game specific stuff and
man which you needed because otherwise it's just this number pad and you're like,
I hit four to straight left, like yeah, mini map on, I
had hit eight or whatever. Yeah, I always thought that on an emulator.
Oh right, those games, the ones that took advantage of the pad.
Anyway, they have the CD. The CD, Yeah, it has
a CD on like take a c looks like it did it look like a
toilet bowl was attached to the top of the I don't think so. I
think all of our stuff was on carts. They all looked like Sonic and
Knuckles carts. Okay, yeah, yeah, uh yeah. The CD system,
like the the latch would get loose. So I know multiple people that
had just like butter knives permanently jammed into their CDs to keep it latched shut.
I'm amazed. You knew multiple people that have a Jaguar CD. Yeah.
Period. I ran in past circles, you know. I knew one
guy that had like all the weird consoles like the Neo Geo and the Yeah,
like, I don't own a Jaguar CD. But I also had no
idea about it. Was it the three do that had one controller port and
you hung it out? Yeah, so dumb fucking idea. And we did
that. We played a return Fire, which was this Yeah, like it
was actually pretty fun. It's a great game. And uh, I guess
if you plug in headphones to the headphone jack. As you're listening, like
we're playing against each other and I'm ahead, I'll be hearing like victorious,
like Flight of Valkyriest music, and you'll be hearing like Doom and Gloom music
or whatever. That's that's cool. I didn't realize they were that they did
that. That's that's neat. Yeah, that games actually pretty fun. Yeah,
return Fire is awesome. That's that's such a fucking fatst. What is
it? You can It's basically imagine like a Command of conqueror type view,
like you know, top down, you've got a base, but you're not
like it's not an RTS by any means you can play. I mean you're
not building anything. Yeah, you've got Each team has a flag basically,
and you can be a jeep, which the jeep is the only vehicle that
can transport the flag. The helicopter is the fastest one that can like fly
over water and like kind of scout out and find out where the other guy's
flag is. The tank is what you want to use once you know where
it is, and you just blow up all the defenses around it. And
then there's like this weird APC thing that I never really used. Yeah,
but yeah, yeah, So basically it's finding the other person's flag, getting
there, just throwing the defenses, driving the jeep there, and just hauling
ass back to your It's the split screen where their creeps. No, there
are the defenses around the base towers need to kind of handle. But but
yeah, yes, okay, in a manner of speaking, some of the
maps would have a jungle, a pudge maybe the APC. Maybe the APC
is pudge. I don't know. The only thing APC does this black hole.
I don't know. Okay, Uh, return Fire is a hell of
a game. It's really cool. I heard there's a PlayStation version too.
Is it pretty much? I think so? It might have more maps,
I forget. It seems like one of those things that could have used the
link cable, like one of the few PS one games that yeah, or
like Clan of Conquer used that it was the Metal might have Doom, yeah
do it? Yeah, wipe Out XEL obviously. Yeah. Yeah, it
was just really cool to get this like huge assortment of games I had never
heard of or played before, since I never had those systems. Yeah,
I had all the like the big systems that Anys and the Superintendent and all
that stuff, but never these like weird expensive side ones and yeah, it's
the whole wall of this stuff. Yeah, that stuff's nonsense. It's a
lot of these games are forgotten for a reason. That's that stuff was hard
to find when you were a kid, Like I don't remember what the Jaguar
cost when it came out, but the three D two fifty I remember it
was not that much. It was not it was not three D expose because
the first three DIO, the first the Panasonic, I forget what the model
number was, but the first version was seven hundred dollars. Yeah, and
that was in early nineties money, right, Like it was hard to find
somebody that had a three do I like that one. The Neo Geo were
basically and the CDI also was was similarly pricey, though the CDI was barely
a games machine. I remember in the old like game in magazines you would
see the like the cost to import or just buy these games from whatever companies
there were, and like the Supernintendo games like it would be the standard fifty
sixty, SBM would be eighty maybe, and then Neo Geo games, individual
games would be like six hundred dollars. Yeah. I was constantly thinking like,
is this some weird thing where they're not putting the end symbol or is
this some weird currency, Like there's no way a six hundred dollars for this
copy of Samurai Showdown. Yeah, they weren't. They weren't six They were
more games a ton of money. Yeah, you console you would get,
Yeah, you would get a console and the Neo Geo Gold, which was
like the console controller and Magician Lord, I want to say that was like
a six hundred or seven hundred. Yeah, it's just the games. The
ROMs were so big. They're pretty arcade perfect. It was literally, I
mean you can you can install a custom bious into a Neo Geo now that
will let you flip between home and console because they're all on the same and
it's just a mechanical adapter. Or cartridges. The cartridges are different the cards
because they don't want they didn't want operators buying the keep three hundred dollars cartridges
for their arcades. They wanted them buying the eight hundred dollars or a thousand
dollars cartridges for MVSS. Yeah, but that was that was mainly manufacturing cost.
Like, that's the same principle that made Chrono Trigger eighty dollars when it
came out, Like Fantasy Start four was one hundred dollars. There's a lot
of ram or a lot of ROMs on that thing, and it costs money.
Yeah, well, what what did it console? Like the nests?
I think I bought my nest for like eighty bucks and then this nest I
got as a gift. So was it like one hundred two? I want
to say this nest was two hundred when it came out. Sounds right.
I think any like the with the with Mario duck Hunt was one hundred,
right, I would say maybe that was more than that. Maybe it was
when I like the original launch a neys like rob the Robot, like Deluxe
Kit Robot Gun. No, no, no, this is prepad Okay,
it's like at launch it was it was like Gyromite and duck Hunt and I
think Mario Brothers on separate cartridges. Uh, and then this big ass box
that had the robot and the light gun in there. I want to say
that might have been like two fift That plausible, but I don't remember.
I can look it up. But then yeah, I think I want to
say Scess with Mario World was two was one nine nine, and the Genesis
was I remember paying two hundred bucks for a Genesis, but I don't think
it came with a game Altered Beast. I'm pretty sure I bought this was
one of the second bought fresh I got it late. Yeah, okay,
so I would want in like ninety three. Probably the ninety four years was
Sonic. The one I bought was was Sonic mine I bought. I went
to Tower Records and bought mine, and I bought Madden and NHL because the
kid who had NHL and Madden on our floor because I was a freshman in
college. The kid who had on our floor funked out over the holiday.
Somebody had to come in, so somebody had to step up, because you
know, I had to do what was necessary. I think I got some
toys rust deal where it also came with pat Riley basketball. What a deal?
Yeah? Wow? That perfect game? Who made that? Pat Riley?
That's probably Sega. That's probably Sega's basketball game, because you know they
did Tommy le sort. I was gonna say they were going after coaches for
their stuff. Pat Riley was at the Lakers still, right, Yes,
so that would a been yeah wow, yes, yes that that game was
super real basketball in Japan and then they put it out as pat Riley Basketball
here. Yeah that game. Man, it was not a not a great
game. But I love Tommy sort of Baseball's game and h L ninety four
though, that's a whole reason at Genesis Yep, yeah, like that was
an amazing game. That was that crazy moment of like the Master System was
like this also ran next to the NES like nobody cared, but then all
of a sudden, the Genesis just like took off like a rocket. I
remembers games. I remember buying a Master System and this was like after a
year or two of the NES and like getting that thing and being really bummed
out, like feeling like I had made a huge mistake. Yeah, there
wasn't a lot of sting that after you had a Nintendo. Yeah, okay,
that would do it, and like there were games on it I liked,
but at some point it was just like, man, like the games
aren't coming out fast enough. Some of these games that I've got that I
picked up just suck. I feel like we were buying Master System Games at
Costco. I don't know. I thought I bought Nest games at Hills Hills
and Kmart and it was always it was always based on cover art. It
was total crapshoot every time. Yeah, yeah, I was renting a lot
back then because there was a good local place that was renting games. I
did too. I looked at the Master System Games at Roses. You guys
have a rose yet lun chairs at it Roses one time. It sounds about
right, Yeah, you couldn't do that with Master System games though, because
the box art was just it was just this white box with this grid on
it. No, it looked cool. No, I was like, cool
box design. I love the box design. But if you're if you're like
trying to shop for games, it's fucking terrible because it just says the wrestling
and then you're pro wrestling. You pick it up and it's like, here's
a dude. I don't know. I don't think it was any better than
looking at that picture of Mega Man on the cover of Mega Man for the
next that was at least more evocat oh man, this is gonna be awesome.
It looks like a pit and no, no, maybe the mass games
were like more realistic than yeah or something. But pro Wrestling was a great
Master System. Master System had two carts, two different kinds of carts.
Cards. Yeah, it had carts and then had cards, and so those
were I think that's just the legacy of like what that system was in Japan
and the way they kind of upgraded it over time, from like the SG
one thousand or whatever up to the Mark three. And yes, they wanted
to have like cheaper games to be available on these cards, and yeah,
the Master System just had both, but it was I don't know. The
card games came in thinner cases. It's like Transbot came in this like really
thin case. I thought that was really cool, so you could tell yeah,
okay, yeah, but the games were the same. I mean,
you know, it didn't seem like like a capacity different. It probably was,
but it's just like it didn't it didn't read as like this huge capacity.
Did Ice Climber need as much space as the legend Zelda? Probably not?
Probably not, yeah, probably not. Both consoles are fun, I
like, yeah, she could dig some more of those up. You're not
gonna run out and buy a Jaguar anytime soon, though. No, no,
but it was still super fun. Whenever I go back there, I'm
sure we'll play some more of those. It's good stuff. Yeah. I
I could bring in my Jaguar if you want to conroduce my UPF to play
some garbage. And I don't think I actually own Ultravarte uh but Vortex or
vortechte. I think it's Ultra Vortex. It might be uh god, I
actually do have a look, wait, you do have a Jaguar, crazy,
just not a CD. I didn't. I don't have a CD.
He's not a crazy person. I ended up. I ended up with Joe
Fielders Jaguar. So I was vying Joe Fielders really war with CD at one
point and then ended up not getting it. And it was this whole Did
it have a CD? Maybe? I don't know if I still have it
or not, but I don't remember there being a CD. He he he
literally drove up to the curb outside of my apartment and just like shoved a
brown cardboard box out the window and drove off like he did not want that
thing. And it's Vortech Ultra Vorte. Yeah, he was moving. Yeah.
So yeah, while we're on the topic of old shitty mortal kind of
bat Clones. What do you know about Tattoo Assassins. It's a terrible game.
It never officially came out. It was right, it was test market.
Yeah, yeah, they put it out on tests. It was it
wasn't quite finished, but it was. It's it is in a very playable
state in mame okay. That and it was the story and like stuff was
come like it was coming with one of the guys that worked on Back to
the Future, the movie Data East, right, yeah, yeah, okay,
And there's a whole so there's a whole lower behind that where Data East
was primarily a pinball company and they wanted to get into video games, and
so like there's some ties to some guy who had like story credit on Back
to the Future. Did data Did data used to get bought by Tato or
something like that or the other way around? Data East stuff ended up being
weird. They ended up getting bought by a company called g Mode, which
did mobile stuff in Japan. Okay, And so I don't know where the
IP rights this is. So Data East made wind jammers. So at some
point I spent some time trying to track down the IP legacy of Yeah,
of course they made bad dudes. Yes, they made the RoboCop arcade games.
Yes, that's a good game. Burger Time is a data East two
points. Well right, one of the fatalities and Tattoo Assassins is you just
dropped the Burger Time burgers on top of someone in the points come out with
that's pretty good. Yeah, yeah, that's not Actually that's good. It's
a good weird throwback. Yeah, No, that game sucks. Is then
you want to hear the story about that game? Is that Tattoo Asassins is
a shitty games. Thousands of fatalities, like YouTube like just you know,
Tatto Assassins fatalities. They're fucking weird and it advertises like literally thousands of fatalities.
Well, there's there's also Bloodstorm which came out. That came out and
that Johnny Cage and the ad right right, and that game also had a
ton of finishing moves and that was the one that would like you know,
they basically were baiting game magazines to cover their game every month by putting shout
outs to game magazines in their finishers and shit, uh and like we're gonna
give you the exclusive ones. It makes your magazine name show up and like
its fucking terrible. It was people like that, like just that took the
exact wrong lessons from Mortal Conference. Yeah, then there was then there was
time Killers where you didn't even have to wait for the end of the rounds
to things like that. There's that that's a cool idea and time Killers.
But man, that game is shit. It's bad. So whatever, we
have not applied the science to it. Maybe I was I was maybe being
the greatest fighting game of all times. I was just about I was about
to ask, so did Tattoo Assassins ever make it to any kind of market
whatsoever? It was ineligible for rankings. I might consider it eligible for rankings.
It is right, it is now widely available, should you want to
play it and are willing to kind of look the other way on some intellectual
property laws, I guess, But that's that's the way it is. Uh,
you should do a very special episode around Mortal Kombat clones. That's when
once we get into that, it's going to be a very round actual dark
time, like a bunch of really terrible games. Uh, some of them
coming from Midway themselves, like Makes the Dark Age and and bio freaks,
a lot of stuff that was what was the acronym for bio freaks? What
is that sand for fucking really awful? I don't know. I don't know.
I don't even know I spell freaks Apparently. I just imagine. I
imagine that those Mortal Kombat clones happen because the like, I picture an old
white guy in a suit who's the executive for the game, and he's like,
look, kids love people. It's it's like the guy in Wayne's World,
right, okay, owner in Wayne's World. He's sitting there, he's
like, look, the kids love to rip people's heads off what they want,
and here you go, here we go, biological flying, robotic,
enhanced armored killing synthoids. Wow, yeah, that's synthoid. Jeff. It's
uh, it's like it's like it's the fake Uh, it's the fake politicians
that Cobra made to infiltrate the levels of government. Yeah, and and and
uh ship ship wreck, yeah, shipwreck. All the people fucking melt and
if everybody fucking freaks out, well they made a video game about it.
A good episode of Unlicensed, but you know, it's a pretty good episode
of anything might be the best episode of eighties cartoon and really Haunted two part
It's yeah, that's three. Is that one worse than when they go to
the parallel dimension where everything is slightly off. That one's so good too.
It's so creepy spiders they ended up and like some of the g I Joes,
this was how they wrote some people off the show. Was they went
to an alternate dimension and then like Zap and Rock and Roll stayed behind in
the alternate dimension to help the good Baroness fight Cobra. It was it was
basically it was basically the Star Trek, like the Evil Universe. It was
just like everything was slightly different in some way. But they were like,
well, we want to put more of Bazuka and Footloose and the toys were
trying to sell this year onto the show. We need to get Clutch and
all these other fuckers out of here. I mean, you know, there's
a long history of that kind of Shenanigan. Yeah, you know, including
like Orson wells oh yeah, I'm an in although those movies that example,
it's just like like half of your favorite characters die in the first ten minutes
of kids movie. You already owned Jazz we don't need to put him in
anything else, But what if we turned him into something else? I was
holding Jazz just oh yeah, yesterday, we have abot of jazz. Jazz
shitty. Oh, Jazz was one of my first one. Jazz and Blue
Streaks were some of my first transformers. He's a car, you know,
really a robot. Never I never had Jazz, But wasn't he super weird
to transform? Like? I thought? Yeah? Arms didn't work? Right?
Yeah, the ones, the ones where their arms had to like cross
over in front of each that's always the never work. That's where they went.
And Megatron's barrel always would fly and he sucked. No, I don't
know my favorite transfer. My favorite transformers are the ones where the doors become
wings and yeah, both As and Blue Streak do that okay, where it's
like the hot cakes thing turns into a terodactyle. I do have one of
those somewhere. They're the only ones I ever had. But I had all
of those. Okay, it sounds about right. Yeah, that's not hard
for me to please. All right, Jeff, have you been playing much
like live? Really really talk about video games? Let's talk about the video
Okay, you mentioned you asked me something about quick Live last week, and
I was like, I wonder what that's about. Turns out you were playing.
I bought a new mouse and keyboard, and then I was like,
I need to fucking break that they need to fucking put in, so I
need to play some real ass video games, and so I downloaded quick Live,
which they've changed. It's not a subscription service anymore. They're just straight
up selling it from the web browsers. No Steam, it's in Steam.
It has achievements. I think you can't. Actually, I think it just
goes to the Steam page on when you go to their website. Do you
know how much? Is it just straight off the store? So it's been
on sale for five but I think the sales over now. So have they
eliminated the like premium tier, the paper tier, run your own servers and
stuff out of it. So I saw some people posting relatively recently complaining about
it not being free because the player count was not super high, and I
wonder wonder if that just made a change of like, well, now it's
not free, I'm not going to go buy Quake Live, which, you
know whatever, it's ten dollars. Seems like a reasonable price for the most
eminently replayable game perhaps ever Quake three DM. Yeah, although I mean Jeff
played it more recently than I have. But they have made some kind of
weird changes too. Yeah, they've added weapons to it. It's got a
chain gun, it's got the heavy machine gun, which is all due I
think, but you know, yeah, I think so they've added some stuff
like that. There are over one hundred maps in that thing as part of
the base, and a lot of them you just don't recognize, and even
some of the ones you do, they have modified to put like quick Live
banners around, so you're playing longest yard and the rail platform all the way
out there in the end now has a big quick Live logo back there branding
on yeah, which is ever it's who cares, But it's so it's slowly
they're totally sullying Quake Cannon. At least it's not like fucking you know,
a billboard for actual in game advertises. You know, they're broadcasting they can
put an axe body spray ad right, but they did. They did esports
the funk out of that thing. They put like timers on the item responds
and stuff like that. They did. Yeah, and and then they made
the announcers. They welcomed a quick live whenever you connect to a server,
which I think is kind of lame, but uh yeah no, that's that's
it's still basically Quake three and that's still good. Yeah. So so I've
been I've been fucking with that a little bit lately. So did you find
players? I mean wasn't? Yeah, they're related. There are Like when
I look for servers that are under one hundred ping, I only find a
few that have players on them. So there's one that doesn't have many players
on it. Uh, that is fine and good and all that, but
then there's one that is just always fucking over full for a lot of these
map sizes, so it's just like telefrags and fucking nonsense. Which that's fun
too. Yeah, that's how it was when we played Quick one a couple
of weeks ago and upf right like twice as many players as these maps can
support, NonStop chaos. Yeah, and you know, it's I don't know
the maps, so like it's weird having playing this game that is supposed to
be all nostalgia or for me, is all nostalgia, and then like not
recognizing any of the maps because they've added so many to this thing over the
years. But then someone just did a call vote and switched the longest yard.
I'm like, okay, all right, that's like, okay, let's
do this. You feel like you're home again. Yeah, there's there's like
a weird fish out of water feeling. Yeah to playing new maps in those
games, I find myself though, And I guess I've felt this way about
this game about Quake three at the time. Is I played enough UT to
want a weapon priority switching system instead of like either you have to switch manually
or it'll auto switch to whatever weapon you pick up next. You use ESDF
for your movement keys, and then Q W, E, A, and
Z are hot keys for railgun, rock launch a green launch machine. I
just made Q the rock Shauncher and it's been fine. It's all you really
Q and E one launch shotgun right good? Yeah? Yeah? And the
rail gun maybe yeh, Like Q, Q and E are rocket and rail
yeah, rail rail and lightning gun. And I think it added like whatever
F is to switch back to the previous weapons, so if I pick up
something I don't like it, I can quickly switch back. Can we talk
about the railgun. Yeah, do you think, like looking back now,
but we know there nobody puts railguns in modern games, right yeah, if
they're modern games aren't meant to be like like modern games are more lag tolerant,
so a railgun is a lot harder to do it. But it was
his scan still, wasn't it. I mean, you know, like sniper
rifles in the closest thing to that, probably it's kind of a hit scan
potential one he killed sort of thing. Well, but then think about the
railguns gives that trail to point back to you ever just missed you if they
don't kill you. Did you ever edit your fig file to change the color
of your trail? Of course, Yeah, you don't have to edit your
They just just dragged you thing built it in. Yeah, I think that
was even maybe your race Quake three at some point it wasn't a confict file
thing anymore. But that but the railgun is why I bounced off a Quake
three after a while, Like where has quick one stayed forever? Because it's
just basically about shooting rockets? Really Yeah? Yeah, no, I could
see that, Like especially you just especially those wide open maps, you just
find yourself blowing up and you don't know why. It becomes less about tactics
and more about how fast you can you put the thing. And then there's
such a high skill ceiling on that though. If you got really good at
it, oh that's the problem literally dominant. Yeah, so get better.
But you and I have a railgun. We look, we're old men now,
we're never gonna be good enough to do I hit four rail shots in
a row last night. That's pretty good. So I mean that you could
still do I take it. You can, you can still do it.
I'm gonna quit my job. I'm gonna go ahead and play. I have
the Tiger on loop for our fighteen hours straight. Yep. Just get into
that quick live. Something something about snapping off and hitting rail shots like guys
bouncing off the jumpads and just tagging them out of the air before you even
know what you did. Oh that's the other couple of changes they made a
quick live is numbers fly off of guys when you do damage, so you
see the numbers. Yeah, so when you hit that rail shot and then
eighty pops off, you actually feel pretty good. New Doom multiplayer that as
well. Uh, and there's also a separate. You know, it has
the hit noise. There's a deeper clunk noise when you like make direct contact
with a rocket. That actually feels pretty good because you're like you're used to
the damage noise when you hear it go punk, Yeah, you're like,
yeah, fuck that guy, that's pretty good. That sounds okay. Yeah,
I guess Quake Deathmatch actually was all about doing the math right on,
like how much armor do they have and right have they gotten the mega health
and have they been controlling those items? And how many rockets is it going
to take to kill this person? Yeah, but you don't know, so
you know, it doesn't display their health. It just that's the damage,
you know, right, Yes, Yeah, but I was never I was
never really into the like some people were just like Rocket Arena was like the
beginning and end of Quake for them, and I just never got into it.
Rocket arena was the was a big deal for me. I feel like
in Quake two, yeah, that's I think that's where it's. That's what
they ended the arenas, right, and it already too. Yeah, they
added all the multi arena stuff so you could just play more frequently and not
have to watch as much so well. But the watching is where I learned
how to play definite. Like like when you'd get on a server with seven
people, which was totally worked on dial up yep, in that because yeah,
that's I lived in dial up country. You'd stand on the on the
transparent ceiling, look down through the arena and watch how people were leading and
like how they're using cover rather mix up their movements. And that's literally how
I like got competent at first person shooters. I just didn't want to do
that in an arena. I still like running the map in Quake is part
of why I like it so much, you know, oh yeah, using
using you know, entry ways and barricades to your advantage and you know that
kind of thing. When and now when I play in a one on one
setup, I'm fucking awful, really the worst. Uh yeah. I am
picking up kills from people who are shooting at other people a lot, now,
you know, yeah, yeah yeah, and I'm doing okay. I'm
not winning matches by any means. Uh but yeah, Like I used to
be pretty good at Rocket Arena. I used to that those skills are gone.
Well, like one on one, I like I remember playing DM six
on Quake one a lot as a one on one map and just getting so
used to because because the other thing you forgot about Quake is there's no hit
indicator. There's no thing that tells you which direction the hit came from.
Right right, Yeah, So you just all of a sudden you're you're dying
and you have to start spinning when you see the guy, and so you
end up using audio cues a lot more like I remember, switching from speakers
to headphones was a big, big change for me on Quake. Not that
never any good. You just but you can hear the rocket come, yeah,
you hear what? You you get that left right? Split? You
turn this way instead of that. You can't see what I'm gonna turn left
instead of right. Yeah. Yeah, it's a good game. It's a
good ass games, good ass game. I hope Quake Champions is good.
Yeah, Champions. The new Quaked. They announced the new Quake and right,
you're what you're somewhat out of games. They announced the new Quake any
three, but it's like single player only, it's multiplayer only. It's PC
only, but it is not making it Quake live. It is they're ever
seen it. The more the more I think about it, the more I
think it's probably Quake Live too, or is it like Unreal Championship the Quake
version also okay, so okay maybe, but also it's it sounds like it'll
be more like character based, ability based, like there will be some of
that. Yeah, and like they showed that they only showed a CG trailer
so far, but like one of the characters had a little quick blink teleport
kind of thing like a tracer in this game. Saber Interactive. Who is
Saber Interactive? They worked on the Halo anniversary campaigns, They did Time did
that Time Shift game a few years ago, did not especially like, uh
so, yeah, that's a little weird. But also it sounds like that
there is some maybe some lineage or there are people there that were at least
around back in the Texas Shooter days. That's what I have heard that would
that would care very much about making a great Quake. So we'll see.
Look, the stuff that's come out of enfranchises that they've handed off to other
studios right lately been awesome. A Quake four campaign look well, in the
Quake four campaign, if if they marketed that really poorly, Yeah, they
had they've done a better job with that. It would have been received much
better. Yeah, but also that was yes, you know, that was
just over ten years ago under Activision. Like it's a very different world for
ID properties these days. Yeah. I mean Activision well known for well kind
of fucking things up left and right. So but I mean they are two
for two so far since the befessayout of bringing back old properties and doing a
damn good job of it. Yeah, so they didn't just say go make
Rage two, which is great. If they did not do that, I
don't think good game in Rage. There's a good game in Rage somewhere,
but it was not in Rage. Parts parts of Rage were really good and
it looked fucking amazing. Yeah, that's the time, will Smith gradu Maker,
what have you been up to? Well, you know, talking,
I do a lot of talking these days. I went I went to the
doctor and had my vocal cords camerad what because I've been losing my voice a
lot late, So I went to the special doctor and the camera. I've
been thinking about this issue. It's it's scary, right, It's like if
I lose the ability to speak for a few days, that has a pretty
significant impact in my professional life. Sure, so I got appointment. It
took a long time. I went in and they they talk to me for
a little bit about how I used my voice, and I've never sounded crazier
in my life because they're like, what do you do for a living?
I was like, well, I just I talk a lot. But they
had this camera on a pole that was about a foot long, and it
has a strobe on the end, and they tell you just you lean forward
in the chair and push your chin out and stick your tongue out, and
then they rest the probe on your tongue and he kind of holds it just
a little bit off so he doesn't make you gag. And they keep shoving
it further and further back, and you can see a monitor in front of
you until like some guy ger esque business opens up and you're you've got like
vocal cords moving, and then they have you sing and talk and make sounds.
It was really cool. Yeah, I wish I had video. I
wouldn't want to see it. That would that would be the part that would
make it hard for me to do. I would videos. I watched it
afterwards, like, oh God, that shouldn't be that far down there.
You have to watch it live so that you can see that you're not doing
something that abstocks the camera. So there's no choice. Okay, you have
to know that your tongue isn't like moving away, that's it's the way their
way past your tongue. Like like he get first, they give you a
little tour of like what's the business that happens? Like they're like here,
this is this is the thing that closes over your windpipe when you swallow food.
This is where the food goes, is where the air goes. This
is where the air comes in from your It was really cool, is there?
Do they have any way to suppress the gag reflects or do they just
have to be very careful. You have to not move And he hovers above
and they tell you kind of if you feel like you're gonna gag to warn
please please don't just vomit all over how many people they make throw up?
And he's like, I haven't made anybody throw up. I'm a professional.
He seemed a little bit offended that I suggested that, So what was the
upshot of the whole thing? I have prognosis. I have to go to
physical therapy muscles around my vocal cord. They're very tense, Yeah, because
I use my muscles to counteract some bad habits I'm developed. Because I didn't
go to broadcaster school and learn how to enunciate properly. I'm finding on the
end of a long recording day that sometimes by the end my voice will have
gotten gravelly. Yeah, and that used to not happen. That's the thing
that told me I needed to go to the doctor. What about at the
end of something like E three, where you're doing four hour shows every night,
is that that will be okay? Because that was that's only four hours,
you know, Like if we're going through a full day here, an
extra life marathon, yeah, or even just a normal day of recording here,
that'll end up. Or just walk around here talking to people or on
a podcast day and then we would go record something. And yeah, we
were. We were recording the ads after the show a little bit recently,
and then I realized we can't keep doing that anymore because I sound worse after
the show than I do before. Huh. Well, So He's like one
of the things that they said is if you find yourself clearing your throat more
than is normal, Like that's the thing that resets the muscles for me,
and that's why I do that. But it feels like you have something like
just kind of back in the back of your throat. Degradation of vocal cords
over and over your lifespan is kind of scary. Well, we could give
it happen, like the stuff that we thought what you should should be doing.
Yeah, right, like like doing long asso gasts all the time and
doing these sitting down from I'm just gonna do what Axle did joke get what
was? Just drink whiskey? That's the thing I was. I was actually
I was reading about that stuff recently, Like the lifestyle has an effect on
this, Yeah for sure, you know, like professional singers got to take
care of that stuff. Drinking a lot is real bad for your voice.
No spoken, no drinking, no yelling, no screaming. Yeah. So
I played some video games. Yeah, yeah, I finally played an uncharted
game, so I have over the ears, bought all of the uncharted games,
and then played about forty five minutes and bounced off as soon as it
got to be a shooting part. No kidding, because like those the bits,
like there was a bit and Uncharted two specifically where you get to like
the first kind of open arena. It's and I'm in the forest ruined someplace.
Yeah, there's like big brut blocks, a lot of stuff to hide
behind, and the guys shooting. Yeah, I can't remember how that game
starts. Well, so two starts with you're hanging off the train. But
from there, but then it real quickly goes the train is an it's a
flash forward forward and then the first big open thing is where you get the
grenades and the jungle and all that. Yeah, okay, yeah it was.
I want to say I might be wrong, but because I didn't really
spend that much time figuring out how it works, because it pissed me off.
But the shooting was bad, and I would you're not, yes,
that is valid opinion. I would say it's adequate at best. It's definitely
not. There are better third person shooters. Yeah, And like it seemed
like they were just monster closets that kept spawning bad guys infinitely unless you unless
you pushed forward, So I was cheating. Like you would call a duty
or something where you kind of shoot people and then you clear the room,
then you move to the next spot and I was just like, this is
fucking going on forever. It's like an hour maybe. So I bounced off
of all of the uncharted game. Is the long story short, I bought
I bought four because I talked to boys, I think, and he was
like, this one, this shit tries. This was pretty good. I
was like, you have a bias here, man, But I was bored.
So I bought it and it's a it's a really neat game, and
I turned on. The big change for me is I looked in the options,
I turned on the lock on. Yeah. I feel like everybody I
know who has had the best time with Unchartered four has gone that into like
the assist features, like Vinny Vinnie played it on, like the lock on
at some point is it takes a lot of the game out of the game.
Yeah, So I turned it on. At first, I was like,
oh, let's check this out, and it just felt like it was
too much. So I felt bad for my I felt bad. Well,
so you're saying I'm playing the game wrong. No, I think that that's
a valid way to play. I just I don't know. I liked I
like the way Vinnie described it as like it lets you play the way Nathan
Drake should be able to do things, which is like he's a bad flying
through the air, like hanging on a grappling hook and like popping off headshots
as you go. You know, like, of course he can do that
well. And I left it off until I got to the part where the
shooting was frustrating me, right, So I left it off for probably two
thirds of the game. I think he was in Africa by the time I
turned it on, and then I was. Then it made me like that
was the push I needed to want to finish the game, because otherwise I
was just going to keep doing the same shit over over again, getting frustrated.
And you were right to do that. The last I think Dan said
the same thing, like the last major firefight in that game in particular,
is a real fucking grind. Ye. Yeah, that's a that's that's a
a triumph of art. Man. Those games are unbelievable. Is like,
Yeah, it's a mind blowing How good getting that game looks? Yeah?
I like, and I lived like so the first the first Audie Dog game
I guess I played in modern times was the last of us. And I
played this a lot like last of us, like I steal through a lot
of stuff and kind of stuck around people, And it's more of a viable
option than for than I think it's ever been in that series. I think
it's the first time that it has been a fully viable option. You can
play for my most entire combat, you can play through the most of that
game that way. Yeah, it's I So. Yeah, I was skeptical
that I was going to be excited about it, and was pretty stoked at
it in the end. And then yeah, I think that a bunch of
Overwatch. We went down, We went and watch I did Duke. Oh
yeah that started since last week. Yeah, I was just gonna stay real
quick. We went down to the Stutra of Baths yesterday. Yeah, there's
I had never walked around there for whatever reason, I've lived here for thirteen
years and I've never gone down there. But there's some real uncharted shit around
there. Oh it's significantly Like it's crazy. Like my girlfriend was looking around,
going like that looks like a handhold and a jumping puzzle, little sequence
straight up, Like there are parts where it's like, oh, you could
climb up that little rock face. And then there there's those old like rebar
looking stuff sticking out of the cliff that you could like hand hold your way
around. Like it's nuts. There's there are people I've seen people climb that
maybe not the stuff on the cliff cliff side, but like they're definitely I've
definitely seen people down there before. But it seems like it's a scary place
to be. Yeah, anyway, I'm sorry. Overwatch competitive, Yeah,
it's a little broken. It seems like, I what part do you think
it is broken? I found it. It's definitely tougher. It's a tougher
breed of player for sure. So I've gotten through, I've done most of
the I think I finished this my like competitive ranking matches. Yeah, I
haven't had a lot of time to play Overwatch this week. It's it's like
I like that idea, like the idea of a StarCraft style ladder in a
competitive shooter. That's like Overwatch is really really exciting to me. But the
things that people seem to be bitching about the amount you go up versus amount
you go down. And I think it's specifically the leaving penalty is like the
rage quitting penalty is broke is not it doesn't work right well, it's right,
too much, too little, like it's it's terrible, and if you're
just playing quick play, well, it happens if you do quick playing quick
I've done it a couple of times because I have a kid. I think
Bianca had to leave early in one match whatever for some reason, like we've
never rage quit and she didn't earn she earned like twenty percent XP or something
for the next like ten matches or it was something really bad for one VeryE
one time and it wasn't even like she played half to match and then quit,
like it seemed really, I mean, that would be a lot more
damaging if you got anything useful out of XP, you know, like it's
it's just like I know, I know it's I know it's a bummer.
But at least they're not like holding weapon unlocks back or something like. Yeah,
so it seems it seems like well the rage quit thing, it seems
like and I apologize because I'm probably gonna get this wrong, but but you
when you quit, if you quit, if somebody quits within the first like
two minutes, then the entire match just starts over right, which is which
is weird. Yeah, but I mean, but I get why with with
a new player they matched somebody else in I think they match somebody else in,
or you may they may dump everybody else out to match making and do
it all over again. There was There was actually a really good post on
either the Blizzard forms I think it was linked from the Overwatch subreddit that explained
how like their goals with matchmaking. That was super interesting and like how they
do groups with groups and stuff like that. But so okay, So if
you if you, if you punch out early, then it starts the whole
round over or maybe the match. It was unclear whether it's per round or
per match. But then if somebody quits that's not you, then that affects
how much XP you gain on that, everybody else gains on that if they
win, and how much rank you go up, which is which seems really
fucked right. It seems like it's weird to penalize people who don't rage quit
for people who quit, and it seems like they're like the negative feedback loop
that prevents people from quitting isn't quite right at least right now, Like they're
not giving you a good reason to not quit and just stick out and take
the loss yeah, because because like you're gonna lose a lot of rank,
but you're also going to lose a lot of rank you lose and then you're
you punish everybody else when you rage quit, So it's it seems shitty.
Also, is there any way that you could organize it, like a team
could organize it to get somebody on the other team to sabotage, because we
kind of thought that's what was happening when Bianca plays either Mercy or Farah,
usually Mercy, because like if someone else was playing as Mercy, should switched
the Farah back and forth or whatever. And there was somebody on our team
that every time she would switch, the other person would switch to what she
was, and like when this other person was Mercy, they weren't healing anyone.
When they were Farah, they weren't attacking anyone. Like it was just
like very purposeful and antagonizing. And I didn't know someone just being a dick,
or if there's some way that somebody get like a mold onto our team
or whatever, it could be somebody that knows you too. Didn't recognize the
name, right, Yeah, no, no, I mean no, like
not a friend says Okay, who knows. Like part of the problem I
think in this first week was that the competitive matchmaking was such that you weren't
getting like you didn't have the good matchmaking because they didn't know where people stood.
Maybe I don't know. I had so far on my competitive matchmaking games
it was one blowout every single time, either for or against me. And
part of it was that, like teams were communicating. So it's like like
that that's a game that if you have two people that are shooting at one
person, the team that has two people shooting at one person is always gonna
work. Oh right, Yeah, And so like when people are going out
in ones and twos versus people going on in a group of five or six,
the group of five or six wins every time. Yeah, it sucks
too, because if you're trying to take competitive seriously, you want to get
everyone on voice chat. And like normally with every multiplayer game, I turn
off everyone except for if I'm playing in a party with someone with the headsets
and just talk amongst them. But then he turned on voice chat for the
whole team and competitive, and that opens it up to like, oh right,
this is what multiplayer games are like. When I can hear everyone sounds
like you're ready for Doda. Nope, I haven't had a whole lot of
bad like I've muted. It's a couple of people probably, but I haven't
had a lot of like people using pejoratives about my skill or parentage. Maybe
I just stuck because yeah, do they do they split people up into like
leagues with names on them like they do in StarCraft and stuff like that.
Do they have the kind of equivalent of like bronze and silver. I don't
think so yet, but it feels like that option is there, Like it
feels it feels like a real hybrid between like a like a fighting game ladder
and like a StarCraft kind of thing. They I don't think they're breaking out
teams though, So I don't think there's like a team league, like you
have a StarCraft and then at one mom like you don't have a separate three
still ranking for your set team. Okay, Like I was a little I
kind of wish that they had that where you had like where you had a
ladder where like you get your six people together and and generated does a whole
separate set of placements. They would eventually grow into that and maybe this is
just yea, they're out right now? Yeah? Can you do they expose
any of your skill stuff at all? Do you see a number? You
get a rank, and that rank goes up and down based on how you
perform one hundred? Right? I think so. But they're but they're not
hashing a like, oh you're you're whatever. Get an MMR and okay,
yeah it's MMR indoda. I think my understanding though, is that there is
an MMR that's back there. I'm sure they're obviously there has to been invisible,
and I just didn't know if they were actually exposing that to people,
because that becomes a whole new point of contention once you give that information to
the player base, you know, where people like immediately become super elitist about
what people's MR is and make a bunch of assumptions about that. It's it's
just a recipe for more toxicity in a lot of cases that. I mean,
that could be why people are so pissed off too, because like like
with the amount you drop first of the amount you gain, Like if you're
playing people with a lower much lower hittan MR than you and you lose to
them, you're gonna get them right, a much bigger hit than yeah.
So like, I don't know, it feels like they didn't test this stuff
during the beta that I was aware of. So it seems like maybe this
is the first wave of them figuring out how it's going to work, and
the second season will get better. Like I want to know if they're going
to fix the first season while they're going, or they are already talking in
terms of seasons. I mean, I guess that they do that with three
month season. Okay, and you earn like a different current, like this
competitive points thing whatever, and it costs three hundred purple coins or whatever to
get a gold version of your weapon, and each purple coin is one competitive
win, so you have if you want to get gold weapons, you're going
to be playing a shitload. Wow. Yeah that's cool. And yeah,
and then I'll drag you know, ideally that I'll drag all the people that
care about competitive Overwatch into that ship and make the you know, quick play,
the quick play a little bit more fun. I guess hopefully it doesn't
a little lower stakes probably, yeah, or just lower stakes. Yeah,
I guess that's fucking trial to me. To me, that is fun.
Yeah, I don't know. I mean, are you still playing Overwatch here
and there? But I mean no, Like I haven't played it in like
a week or two or something at this point, but I'm it's still installed,
so theoretically I might return to the option, is there? Yeah,
I thought it was interesting. I guess they talked about making different balance changes,
specifically to the console versions of the game to deal with like the different
turning radius involved and stuff. It was specifically they were going to do something
to the nuds to tour Burnes Turret on the Xbox Ory on the console versions
of the game because of the way that it locks on very quickly and that
sort of stuff. Maybe have like an animation like turning slower or something.
I think it was more that I think they were that seems like the same
thing to do. I think they were doing the opposite of whatever that was.
Like, like the solution didn't sound great either when I read it,
but I take more I don't remember it. I mean I have to imagine
stuff like Soldiers have any six is much more useful, Like his ault is
much better on console than it is on PC. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
problem it's really good too, Like he's my main guy that that alt
is great. Yeah, yeah, I don't know. I've primarily been playing
on PC, but but I did get to like level ten or eleven on
console, and that's the that's the version of the game seems a okay.
So yeah, I don't know alts olts. What's talking about alts? It's
great. Now they're gonna take the olts away from you. Overwatch is gonna
steal all your dodal lingo away from you. God damn it end like the
more people who understand, the less cool it is. Yeah, I want,
I want. I want the next map to be the Jungler m double
Wayammy. There. It's a good game. I agree game. I'll always
have an aggressive try line. I don't know what is that on that's that's
that's from battle Borne. It's when you run the popular mobile. It's when
you run three heroes in the off lane try to shut down there. Ah,
they're they're one. I like the mushroom guy. If you know whoever
feels yeah, I know who's knives. Whoever's playing position one. You want
to make sure they don't get as a little farm as possible. You're you're
a position one. Brad, stop moving on. Let's move on. We're
gonna make a little change this week. Whoa because I got like thirty five
cents said you wanted some change in Minesota. There's not a lot of going
on in the world video game news this week. There's some little bit of
some stuff and not really class Roy. I'll update, keep going, keep
going, keep going, don't don't even keep going to keep talking about something
else. Do you have an installed? Yeah? Do you really know I'm
playing constantly? Yeah, keep keep going, just keep wait. I thought
you quit. I never said that. Oh that man, you said that
when I said I'm throwing this away. I've never Yeah, You're totally shitty.
You totally postured like you were done, like you were audio clips.
Sometimes. I never said I quit. I said I went to quit.
Okay close. I was under the impression. We held the microphone up to
her face and the words I quit were heard once. Once you realize that
the match of the only match make you against people who spend more money than
you, it's really hard to fucking play that game. Yeah, I'm looking
forward to quitting. Whatever. Whatever day it was that, I tweeted a
screenshot of the delete dialogue being up for that app was the last day I
played that game. I actually deleted it and haven't touched it since. And
I'm better off this bump across the law. So so will you be?
I know, I get Tap Tap TI Oh fuck uh Tap my Catamari came
out. Yeah, I'm meant to play that before this I could talk about
it. I have totally forgot. I've played a significant amount of Tap My
Catamari. Okay, well, before we move into not news, tell me
about that. So it's you tapped to roll the ball to roll Katamari,
and it rolls up stuff, and you buy access to your cousins, and
that's your offline earning you buy except for the cousins, and that may they
make the ball roll when you're not there, all right, uh, and
it only ends like two music tracks or a few music tracks. It's kind
of you know. But also your your sound is off on your phone most
of the time, and so a lot of the Katamari charm I think is
wrapped up in the the audio. Best experience with the headings, Yeah,
well, get me to play idole games the headphones on. Another thing coming.
I'm not sure that there's a prestige mechanic. Yet I've played through the
first seventy five levels or so for seventy five waves. I guess it's technically
the second level, but it seems okay but not great. It doesn't seem
like it has a ton of depth to it. It's no tap Tycoon,
all right, I guess that is what I'm saying. Should I go get
that? Is that what you're saying? Is it better than Doomsday Clicker?
Yeah? I have. I forgot that Doomsday Clicker existed until yesterday when I
was reorganizing some apps on my phone when like, oh right, uh,
tap Tycoon's pretty good. Okay, it's from the makers of tap Titans.
I'll go check that out. And it has so adye has a clan element
to it where you can form up in groups of twenty five. Okay,
I appreciate earning potential, yes, ok yeah, investment groups. They're oh
wow, all right, that's pretty good. That does sound good. It's
a hellish nightmare, all right, since tap Tycoon or the tap Tycoon,
Okay, I think it's worth that is my current. That's my pick to
click. Okay, Hellish nightmare. It's like a real yeah, well,
hells Nightmare. You should all install it. Since we're halfway through the Giant
Bombcass Mobile minute here, I've got one on you. Oh really, yeah,
we'll hang on before that, I want to hear Jeff spend the other
thirty seconds talking about Pokemon. Go oh right, yeah, you got into
the Beata four last week. I was supposed to get in it. Yeah,
you were invited first and I said can I get in that? And
then you inquired about it. Then somehow you didn't get it. You got
it. I don't know that it worked, but anyway, it's ended up
being the nittic nant antic makers of what Ingress? Right? Yeah, and
so it's a location based game. They've they've said as much like Ingress is.
And yeah, so I played it. Not I didn't not play a
ton of it, but there was one weekend where I spent like a day
or two checking it pretty frequently, and I specifically went on a walk to
go catch some Pokemon. I don't think it's very good. I don't think
it's a very good location based game, and I think it's like a pretty
poor representation of like the things you want out of Pokemon. Also, is
it is it just Ingress? With Pokemon or is there mine to it?
You pick a team, there's blue, yellow, and red, and so
gyms will will get taken over by uh specific colors. So in my neck
of the woods up in Petluma, everyone had picked red. I picked red
as well, and so I was able to fortify a gym by leaving like
a pidgy or something there to you know, do Pokemon shit and markets territory.
Yeah, basically the build you kind of so, but you walk around
uh this, you walk around the real world. You go on a walk,
You're phone buzzes to say, hey, there's a Pokemon nearby. You
load up the app, tap the button or tap the Pokemon, and then
it is just a catching sequence. Like you have poke balls in your inventory,
you fling them out there with your thumb. It's an ar situation.
You have to aim it like a compass so you can fucking miss. So
it's it's a AR. So you were at that point the camera is on
and you were looking around your environment to find the Pokemon and then flinging a
ball. There's a timing element to it where a kind of circle turns from
green to yellow, which I can't see with my color blind eyes at all,
and then you fling that out there to catch them. You can miss,
you can get bonus XP for curving the shot at it and it's weird,
and then you catch it. It's stats are reduced to like a simple
number from from what they are, and in kind of traditional Pokemon games,
they have like Stone, they have the Earthen's the elemental affinity didn't seem like
it was a big deal because the only time you were actually engaged in an
actual fight against other Pokemon were if you went to a gym. And so
I assume if you're visiting a gym, that is and in the gyms in
the our landmarks in the environment. So in my case, it was like
the local park was a gym. Uh, this shitty Mexican restaurant with a
bar attached is somehow a gym in this game. I don't I don't know.
Yeah, I don't know how Niantic picks what is what in that game.
But I assume if you load it up Ingress, because Ingress has towers
the same way this does, I assume they're the exact same landmarks. But
but I don't know, and they're based on actual like businesses and places of
interest and not just like hey, this is in the middle of the exactly.
Yes, yeah, they're using kind of Google. You know, this
is a company that's spun out from Google, so they had access to all
of Google's satellite and map data and all this other stuff. So they were
very much kind of leveraging that well ingrets exist existed, so they could map
like pass in parks, places that street us they were getting. They were
just getting straight up walking data out of it. Yeah, that's like they
would put a they would put a node at a statue in the middle of
a park, and then they'd see how people got to that node. That's
that's that's how they get mapped. Yeah, that's a pretty benign type of
data to collect. But I still feel like that still feels like slightly in
city hearing that everything somewhere in the fine print. Man, Yeah, future
sucks. They like they didn't make a secret of it at all. Yeah,
yeah, I know, I know, I can't. Can't you just
do something for fun? Though? What's what's is Nintendo trying to make street
maps for like this isn't even this is just Niantic making it Nintendo. So
it's the Pokemon company Nintendo, and so that's a little different. Uh,
and so I think this is just them continuing down that path even further.
But at that point, at this point, they're also probably just trying to
make money, okay, And I mean it makes sense. The game makes
theoretical, yes, Like I love the idea, like I love the idea
of ingress as well. It's just that too many people had played it by
the time it came out on iOS, so all my area was already so
fortified that I would have had to go make friends with people if I wanted
to actually do anything. And that well, how often is this thing buzzing
in your pocket? Like on a typical you know, like one or two
every block or yeah, it's it's pretty frequent. But I imagine if you
if you've got a bunch of them, eventually it might say, all right,
we're not going to give you anymore because at some point you're getting too
many Pokemon you might unbalance. Or if you if you could set some interval
where it's like, hey, only alert me a maximum once per x hours,
you know, so you just ignore it sometimes. How's the how's the
aar stuff? Like is it neat to see the Pokemon scampering around the environment
is it's not. It doesn't always look like it's standing on something. It's
just like you rotate around until you see it standing on air and you're like,
okay, well, like they're not They're not able to like take a
depth map and have it run behind stuff or anything cool. It has not
been great. And so with the fights are like you when you go to
a gym, you can fight, even if it's the gym is controlled by
your color. You can go like fight your Pokemon and train your Pokemon against
the Pokemon that are holding down that gym for your team. And it's weird.
It's this thing of like you, it's real time ish you tap to
attack and swipe a dodge, so it becomes you watching the enemy Pokemon animation
and trying to swipe out of the way of its attack and then tapping to
attack, which when you think about what Pokemon is, it's very much more
of a rock paper scissors and the elemental stuff plus the combined you know,
like you have multiple attacks all the other stuff. It's not a timing based
thing. Yeah, and so it just didn't it felt inauthentic to the Pokemon
brand. I guess I would say they took It's like they took it's like
the Mortal Kombic clips. They took the wrong part of the Pokemon. Yes,
definitely. Uh, they did not. They did not capture the feel
of real Pokemon at all in this thing. It just it just feels like
a game that they slapped together and they just happened to have the Pokemon license.
So it's poke balls and coughings and pigies and you know, there was
that moment where you were standing in the office last week and you're about to
leave and then you're like, wait a minute, there's coughing around here somewhere.
Yeah, it'll just like it was coughing within one hundred meters, and
I was like, fuck, fuck, but it won't tell you which hundred
meters you need to walk in straight up. There's no hot and cold type
stuff at all. That stuff's weird. I think it's I think that mostly
just means hey, if you walk for a while, oh we'll tell you.
Yeah. But I'm not really sure not that, so, I don't
know. The interactions felt really flimsy. Uh. It's attachment to the orse
material also just feels really thrown together. So I don't know, like I'm
not some Pokemon purist. I think the head of a Nyanta got out there
and it stay like, hey, our goal is not to catch them all,
like like every other Pokemon game that's ever existed. Uh, you know,
probably in the wake of some of the criticism out of this this beta
getting out to some of the media, but it just seems like a bad
product and or you know what, it feels like a really good first beta
of a product. But they're launching it this month and it's gonna be free
or is it? It'll have to be Yeah, were there any any indications
of how they're going to monetize this? So you will need uh, you
need put some There are two types of currency you need to level up your
Pokemon, and it's like juice it licks or I Pokemon eat, and then
also candy that is specific to that Pokemon. So you'll need like Pitchy candy,
you'll need squirrel candy, and like what the fuck is that? And
that's just I'm not gonna launch becase I think it won't work right now.
But yeah, so you can go to poke A stops, which are lesser
landmarks in the environment, and those are a little more randomly placed, so
if you're within range of one of those, you can spin it to get
like a few poke balls and other itemosphere your inventory. I suspect that that
will be where they kind of build the shop around, is like, hey,
you can buy gold, and then you can use that to buy a
bunch of poke balls or a bunch of better poke balls, or these these
elixirs or whatever you need to level up your guys. That's probably where they'll
make their money, or they'll try to. But you don't ever fight other
people in the environment, Like if you're walking around and you see somebody with
it. If you're red and you see somebody who's yellow, then you don't
have like a trainer battle. I don't think that's the case, but I
guess I don't know because I didn't encounter any other human players. So conceptually
that stuff sounds pretty cool. Yeah, I was exciting. I love the
idea. I mean, like, if if you think about the like and
it was the thing I loved about Ingress, you know, just conceptually was
like that idea of like, hey, we're these warring factions and as we
walk around the world, shit's gonna happen, Like, that's really cool.
I carry that chain around my yea belt and I went for a walk.
That's nice. Yeah, but the stuff like a like trying to actually go
for a walk with someone and then going like, hang on a second,
I need to stop again, like every you know, every half block to
fuck around with my phone is dumb. But then also I just feel like
it doesn't capture any of the feel of Pokemon along the way, Like it
just it just feels really off, like in a way that like it just
feels like the game made by some other team that doesn't really understand why Pokemon
is great. I want to walk into a room and it'd be like the
trainer battle and then you see Brad's picture come up and like I have to
fight fight by Squirtle again. This thing that though, and I think Ingress
ran into some of this in a different way. If you saw Brad's picture
come up and you had a trainer battle, someone would eventually walk over and
smack the phone out of Brad's hand and win. Yeah, yeah, this
is actually happened. So no, the thing that happened with Ingress. Ingress
doesn't expose players that way either. But apparently some people with Ingress were like
building fences and fucking setting booby traps to stop people from getting close to some
Yeah, to stop people from getting close enough to some of these locations to
take them back. If that's amazing or terrifying or both both both. Yeah,
yeah, wow, people took that game really seriously home. Yeah.
Uh so that stuff's scary, Yeah, sure enough. And so Nintendo had
no involvement in this whatsoever, right, doesn't far as you know, it's
just company Nintendo owns some portion of Yeah. But uh but yeah, those
this has nothing to do with Nintendo's a big No, this is not part
of their big push. This is a different thing or the two they're working
on, animal crossing and fire fire fire arm right. Their shareholder call said
that they would have five mobile apps, uh, including Metamo in twenty sixteen.
I have fis fiscal probably, I think it's probably fiscal and that ends
in March. Yeah, okay, you I should tender for my expectations after
me Tomo, But I'm just dying to see what they do with animal crossing,
like a first step from that, you know. Yeah, yeah,
like if you want to do an avatar based game, you got to build
the avatar thing. That's just true. And then you know, and I
have no illusion that this animal Crossing thing is going to be a full animal
crossing you know, it's not going to be a three S game, but
well yeah, I mean that would be the ideal scenario. But even if
it's like some decent subset of that, how cool is that to have that
in your pocket at all times, just at the ready, you know?
And you know, I think as we look at you know, the future
of Nintendo's games on you know, on the NX and stuff like that,
if you start to look at those as potentially tying into these mobile games,
then you start to get like, okay, well now you can have your
phone be the equivalent of a Pokemon Mini or a VMU or something like that.
You know, if they if they go that far and actually time together,
I think there's some cool stuff they could do with with the next full
animal Crossing game on NX. Yeah, if they tie it into this mobile
thing, well, and you look at all the cool stuff they've done over
the years with like the three DS. Is when a three D S meets
another three DS, interesting things happen. Nobody fucking carries their three ds except
for kids, and I think even them, But everybody has their phone with
them all the time, so like you can do the same stuff. Yeah,
but then doesn't everyone have to leave their Bluetooth on and train their battery
the bluetooth elly stuff. It's it's like it's low enough that it's fine.
Would it have to be Bluetooth? You can do it with the location data
too and get the server, but the stuff will probably an actual better you.
Look, you're you can go to Google and see a path of everywhere
you've been in the last like six years since you've got a phone and put
the Google app on. It cool unless you turn it off, unless I
think I might well not Google Maps. But but my my arrow is not
on. My arrow is on your look, the arrow is always on.
There must be a coughing nearby. But yeah, right, yeah, all
right, real quick? Will what's your train? Do you guys? Play?
Tracky train? Racky train? Is it? Is it in the vein
of crossy road? And the road is it like smashy road? Is it
like flail Rider? I haven't played? Wasn't there? Also? What was
the other one you mentioned? That's the one I've been trying to think of
tracky train. You drive a little car that makes train tracks, and you
have to make the train tracks, go buy passengers and pick up coins,
okay, and you can cross the tracks sometimes but not always, and you
pick up passengers and occasionally you'll get to a train station and picking up passengers
and going through the train station slows down the train. That's always on your
ass. Okay. So it's Gary turned me on? Gary what it turned
me on to this? And it is it's the first of the crossy road
alkes that I've actually liked. I actually smashy Road. I think it's pretty
good. It's like it's GTA. It's GTA. You are it is you
are getting away from the cops. There are stars, they are eventually helicopters
and bigger trucks okay, but you just have to get away for as long
as you can, and you occasionally pick up dollar bills along the way,
just like that, but with trains and passengers. Yeah, okay, Yeah,
I'm gonna have to go back and relisten to the segment. Smashy Road
A vital legend. Tracky Train Trenched Trent Trent Trench trenchy trench, trenchy trench,
steppy pants, eppy pants, steppy hands. All right, okay,
this is all right. Clail Rider flail Rider. Flail Rider is like Smashy
Road, except you are a car towing a flail and you have to do
donuts to make the flails. Building. That sounds That sounds good and it's
kind of cool. I feel like, yeah, I feel like we're at
this inflection point where someone has to come up with a good term for games
that stole cross the roads shit, yeah, yeah, like yeah, okay,
done road alis just call it a mobi. Emobis an emotional mobile.
Everything is moving though, and nothing is. What's the what's the GTA one?
That is smashy rush, smashy road. Okay, all right, I'm
selling all. I feel everybody, get your down. I would normally feel
bad about this, but I assume that everybody's doing this right now at homes.
I'm not. I gotta just run the show. Hurry up and down.
Kamari too, and let's go. Okay, I'm gonna like Katamari.
If I don't care about tap games, No, I love No because it's
not even the best tap game and it captures very little of the Katamari stuff.
So I just ate it right now. Uh yeah, probably it's it's
it's it isn't Okay, I I game, but it is no tap tycoon.
Okay, all right, as I said, very slowly, we can
news. Uh, counterstrike go is rotten with gambling, another shady business.
That situation seems to be developing on a daily basis. Yeah, and there's
a BioShock. Yeah, there's another new new layer to the skins. Yeah.
I'm hitting them skins, Yes, every day. We will keep our
eye on that and see if you guys should make heads to do find out
what what how to how to get into that. Yeah, we're launching our
own skin gambling site and its giant bomb dot com slash Skins with z and
when we get that thing launched, don't go there now. Nothing's there right
now but two broke girls. Yeah pants, we have two broke girls torrents
for pay. That's also nice. Uh. So we got a couple other
things lined up here in lieu of the news segment, Jeff, you sent
over the results of the three Critics Awards. Yeah, yeah, those those
we would quickly run down that list. We're part of the judging panel for
that. So we sent around some notices and said like, hey, I
need to fill out these nominations. Did was this game good? With this
again? Good? Based on some of the people who saw him, and
I pull that out and set it in and now we picked some winners,
and then every other publication that was involved also picked winners, and then they
put them together for the actual winners. Uh some of which I agree with
this which I don't guess how it is every year. Uh. Well,
with that said, let's go through the list. So what people think Right
from the top, Best of Show was Zelda. Yeah, which probably could
have seen coming a mile away. Seems safe. Yeah, this is a
weird split. I might not have I did, in fact, I did.
We give that number one Horizon. We give it Horizon. That's that
was your ballot or are you're talking about the that our list that we did
on this show based on our list, our very bonding list that came out
of the shot typically our vote for best of Show. Also, Horizon did
win Best Original Game, which seems like a weird split. Well, best
Original Game means it's not yeah, it's new I p which is Horizon.
Horizon is the Rilla games of the worldwide, Dinosaurs, future robots, robot
animals. It looks really cool. Zelda took Best Console Game, Sieves six
took Best PC Game. I guess they're probably not a lot of games in
that category, right, Well, how everything is technically coming to PC?
I think the or I assume that the guidelines for voting on this stuff involved,
like it was the game shown on a PC, which in some cases
a lot of console games get shown, like we played Tech and seven on
a piece, even even games that will never actually come out on a PC
or sometimes shown on a PC. Right, So that that's always a little
Yeah. I feel like a lot of these world categories are very strange because
they're they're rooted in genres that like, with every game being cross genre these
days, it's always really weird to nail these things down, like what's a
role playing game? Or so what's an action adventure? Like that's a that
can be a blurry line for sure, that new Zelda role playing game because
there's inventory and like, yeah, I mean I would I would call it
an action adventure game. Yeah, that stuff is more like a survival game
than an RPG. From what I saw okay, taking a level up in
a Zelda adventure, can they tell you? Okay, but the weapons have
stats? Yeah? Assigning points though, is the is the is the gap
skill points? Okay? Yeah? Sure, Yeah, that's a that's a
very That's probably not the only dividing line, but yes, that is.
That is probably a firm one. They're not quite there, but they're getting
there. Best VR game was Batman Arkham. VR could not which stream more
could not until I heard you, like describe the full thing based on you
talking to them, I didn't realize it was a game. It seemed very
much tech DEMOSK. Yeah, well, you know a lot of E three
demos are that way right right, throw on plates at Alfred or something like
that. I didn't see. I only saw the Detective Vision stuff. I
didn't see Nightwing and all that stuff. Yea, yeah, but it is.
It is a product that they were making them we'll sell, so I
guess it does count. Yeah as a game, there were, but there
were a lot of come out as a product that the thing was not that
impressive. In fact, seemed kind of like old. Even walking around that
PlayStation VR event, that seems like they're way more fully formed R experiences there
than than the Batman stuff. Agreed, but not solely our awards. Yes,
Best Hardware PlayStation VR, will any thoughts on that headset as a valued
partner. I'm very excited. Oh I see uh to see that PlayStation VR
picked up some awards show, all right. I think it's great that they
have. I think it's really great that they have a low cost headset coming.
I'm I was kind of worried about the games that they showed, just
in terms of making people sick and the fact that they're going to have this
mass audience and if the games that are coming out that people are like existing
franchises that break a lot of the rules of VR and are going to make
people motion sick right out of the gate like that. That is like,
I'm much more excited about Super Hypercube and what's the thing where you hit the
soccer balls in headaster, Yeah, I always get that in head Like I'm
much more excited about those kinds of games that are made for VR things.
Super Hypercube is so good. It's really good fun, it's awesome, it's
super fun to play. It uses the kind of the unique aspects of VR
in creative ways because it makes you you lean around to see stuff, and
and just the look of it, like the style is perfect hole in the
wall, it's awesome. Yeah, it's a really coold So yeah, I
would have rather seen more stuff like that than than like Metal, than like
Final Fantasy. And yeah, I think that's the stuff. Like I get
why a developer of a big game like Batman, like Final Fantasy, like
why they might not want to commit resources to develop a full game. Absolutely,
but these like Bolton experiences, like especially in Final Fantasi's case, just
seem like a huge step backwards to make or make it something you can get
up and walk around the room and explore it, like like, look,
I can tell you people are really excited about exploring environments from video games firsthand.
Something they are it's fun, they're excited about it. It's good.
You don't have to make a weird game that's going to make people barf.
You can just put them in a cool environment from your game. And that's
what the day sex thing is like with the they're putting that out, I
think I want to say it's free. It's part of their like a benchmark
tool for DA SX, which seems like a weird thing to put out for
that game. They did it last time too, though. Okay, all
right, well so there's a there's a VR component to that where you can
just walk around three or four of the environments for the game. Like that's
that's enough for me. That sounds cool just because those those environments are going
to be very nicely produced being part of a big Triple A game like that,
you know, I mean, yeah, yeah, when you put somebody
in an environment that that twenty people worked on for a month, yeah,
then you're going to look at it and be like, this is fucking awesome
total like the Firewatch stuff that you guys did, like like largely for that
reason. It was just like, oh, fire Watch itself does not have
VR in it, but this is a chance to explore that. I felt
relatively underwhelmed by the day sex thing, I'll say, just because you use
it, there was there was nothing to interact with. That's the Yeah,
yeah, I get interactive. I guess that only stays interesting. Yeah.
So it's just like you're looking at it on like, yep, that looks
like these textures, but in my face, if it could be a three
sixty video and you wouldn't have any appreciable difference, and there's no reason that
is not. Okay, yeah, I guess the Firewatch stuff you guys did.
It was a large part of the appeal was being able to pick up
the objects and like look at the back of them and see things that you
could never see playing the real game, like the day sex thing. I
want to load up that one of those computer interfaces and use their fucked up
future like computer interface, right, just see how that stuff like, let
me noodle around with that in VR? Do the do the prosthetic arms stuff
the JEFT did and realized that VR. Yeah, those arms are neat,
aren't they? Yeah? Yeah, there was a moment there where I was
like, what if I got off? No, yes, there's a Johns
Hopkins is a team that has direct neural interfaces that they inject. They put
like things into people's brains. Do it and but but but the brain reacts
to them as if it's a far invader. So so like they have neural
control over a really high fidelity robot arm. Yeah, but only for like
three months and then they yeah yeah yeah, so like the plaque grows on
the electrodes and then they're no good anymore, and you want to do more,
but it stays in their heads, you don't like I think they pull
it out or something. No, yeah, I don't know how that works.
I didn't ask about that. Is there is there not any like immunosuppressive
type stuff you can do. That's like they're doing the research to find out
how they can make that last longer and if like they need some sort of
brain teflon or something. And and but like the dudes who do it are
are the people who go in and try those studies are heroes because they're doing
it. Yeah, and they're not going to ever be able to do it
again, or at least that's that's what they assume going in and they do
it for three months, they regain the use of a hand, and then
then it goes away. Super sad. Sorry, three months better than no
months, I guess. Well. Yeah, and there's helping people to come
after them, right, Yeah, for sure, theoretically at least. Uh
let's see best action game Battlefield one. A lot of games in that category.
Uh yeah, like you said, best action adventure games ALDA. Yeah
it's an action adventure, ye, say the E three critics. Yeah,
and then you end up yeah, stuff like where's Dax fall. Well,
Dax has a skill tree and Discs has that sort of stuff, so I
think that would go RPG also be a shooter, right, But then but
then best RPG went to Final Fantasy fifteen, which, of course that's kind
of an action game too, but yeah, that's maybe the least RPG that
a Final Fantasy game has been in years, though it would still be an
RPG. And like I said, genres are super muddy. Like I saw
some people like looking at the nominees list and getting all up in arms about
like why some games were in one genre or another, And I think the
answer is the genres are updated. Maybe maybe these awards and no awards should
have genre awards anymore, because it's just crazy exactly why we stopped doing like
like so it's been this way for like five years or just like genre awards
or nuts. Yeah. Uh, Injustice two was the best fighting game.
Second seven sounded really good though, Tech and seven. Yeah, the Injustice
demo was good. I am excited about that game. It ran a litle
framing and stuff like that. I mean, obviously they'll iron that stuff out,
Whereas like I had a fantastic time playing Tech and seven. Injustice too,
You're like, you know this game will get there, and I'm sure
that you know, when they spent all the time with it, it'll be
great. Whereas Tech and seven I feel like was already great. Let's see.
Fort Horizon was the best racing game, easily the most talked about racing
games. And I remember it's kind of a thing category yeah one, uh
what else? There's no need for speed? This year's kind of a lot
of the big heavy hitter. It's not not represented. Yeah, oh Grant
for his sport. And obviously that was like not not emphasized, not like
you're right Sony's booth, that game was not on prominent display. Uh sep
sixth best strategy game. Sure, Skylanders Imaginators was the best family game.
Yeah. Uh Steep was the best sports game. No, you know,
uh, what are the more original sports? Yeah it's Steep. It's a
you be Soft likes game parachuting and wing suoting and skiing. It's like,
yeah, it's like you be soft. What looks like youb soft open world
design, but with snowboarding and skiing and towers mountain sports. I don't think
so but it is open world, or they kind of portrayed it that way.
You can kind of drop yourself the different peaks and stuff like that.
It Man, I I like snowboarding games and games like that. I love
SSX and I like the cool boarders back in the day. This did not
do it for me. Didn't like the snowboarding, just didn't feel great.
No, and a lot of the stuff, like you know, there's four
different things. There's the wing suiting, the snowboarding, you know, blah
blah bla. Like the wing suitting. It felt like a side activity and
just cause not like a quarter of a game, it's just flying through rings.
It really really didn't do it for me. And that's out I think
this year, is it? Yeah, well yeah, we'll see. Uh.
Titan Fall two took the Best Online. Yeah that's a weird category name.
It's online, the best online, the best games that you best games,
this best game that was shown in a multiplayer capacity that has online support,
which is again like every multiplayer game released. Yeah. But uh,
but you know, they did not show the Call of Duty multiplayer here,
for example, so obviously, so that that's that's where that that split starts
to come into play, whereas titan Fall two was ly shown in a multiplayer
setting, as was Battlefields. Weird the titan Fall two would win this category
when Battlefield won Best Action Game, and all the show to Battlefield was multiplayer.
You know, Uhwards, this is this is how all the wards end
up one way or the other. You know, you could try to apply
a bunch of logic to them, but at the end of the day,
it is humans voting on a thing. Yeah, there Destiny. Destiny was
not shown capacity I did. I did a short interview for that new expansion
in which they revealed absolutely nothing that was not already known. So titan Ball
two was super fun. I had a great fucking time with that game.
That's that is? That is maybe? Yeah, depending on what day you
ask me, I might tell you that was my game of show. Uh.
But Horizon is also up there. Zelda's up there October October okay,
Uh. Televid game, Yeah, at least what I saw of it,
And then Best Indie Game went to Inside, which I don't remember seeing anywhere
at the show other than the press conference. Yeah it was was huh.
I wonder if it was. Maybe they must have cut it off early because
I can't imagine they would have just had the whole game out there. Just
feels weird discussing that as like best of the three step when it came out
of a weekly. Yeah that was it was. Yeah, it was technically
shown at E three. That's a weird announcement. But it's also also out
right like I had already played the cold chunk of it before we went to
the show. Uh. Lastly, special commendation for graphics nonplayable went to God
of War. Yeah. Yeah, that's a yeah damn good looking game.
Yeah sure, I didn't know they did any awards for playable games. Yeah,
there's three categories, so there are categories that everyone kind of submits for,
but if there aren't enough nominees, they end up getting dropped. So
there was one for like sound that wow that you know sound, you giving
out a sound award. It allowed a loud show for crazy. Uh,
it is hard. I didn't realize you're just kind of opt out of categories
as a judge. Yeah, it's well, it ends up, you know,
because like if you're the judge that doesn't and it's why we do it.
As a publication. I think more and more of the outlets are doing
it that way for this stuff now just because the or so many games at
the show, like one person cannot see them all, ye, Whereas it
used to be more about like the person is the judge, Like that's that's
never really been how we've done this stuff. So yeah, like sound is
like you end up a situation where it's like, okay, like if you're
the individual and you're like, I'm not a sports guy, so obviously I
would leave the sports field blank because I don't have three games to nominate in
that category. Like I could, I could write in stuff, but you
know, that's the thing where having more people on staff and having more chances
to see stuff than more of those categories get filled in. That makes sense.
And it's also I bet why a game like Steep wins that category because
the makeup of the judges does not necessarily include a lot of people who like
care about traditional sports games indeed more accessible wins or just you know, not
my injustice over techn or not or not Bee. I can see that.
Not this year's Madden, you know, like that's not going to do much
for most of the people, right probably and work in the games press,
and every year they would show off all the ya's traditional sports lineup to judges.
They did not do that this year, but they would show it off
to everybody and you'd sit through the presentation and go like, oh, right,
this, I am absorbing everything you're saying. And it's animation stuff you're
working on. Sounds very interesting, but you are still making a soccer game,
right, and there's only that's only going to go so far with me
as an individual, So that the sweat rendering fan fucking task, that's great.
No, I don't know. It's always it's always like you can turn
around the ball in a much tighter arc, right, every year they get
a little tighter on on that turn. Sweat is very last generation though.
Sorry, yeah, god, I've been twenty three last generation and you didn't
go at all the last couple of years. I went last year, and
they before we just for we would go in for a VR stuff, just
for like a fly in in the morning and then stay through the night and
leave the next day. Even even test towards the end of tested for you,
you guys were going for like a day, right, I mean,
like I remember on the new console year, I came for four days or
something the year that you guys were at the porn set. Yes, right,
and then every other year we would come in like fly, take the
six o'clock flight, be at the show when the floor open, go do
VR stuff all day, and then have like the morning of the next day
just in case we didn't get all of the stuff and then we need to
get done. Come and we would usually leave the next morning. That's so
crazy to think of the three being like a day day and a half.
Let mean we spent type days. Yeah, okays out, I take you
three overseas any day. That's fair man, dark times. Nothing being in
Vegas for eight days is never It's not right. I went to Vegas for
eight days on vacation and it was the worst decisions ever made. I've got
I've got a pretty hard seventy two hour rules. I would say, I
would just say forty eight many three days. Although times where I just never
want to go to Vegas. Now, yeah, well I go. I
go to I go and eat because there's good restaurants there. Like, there's
amazing world class restaurants there now, and I'll go for like three dinners and
then leave. There's a ton of good like not deleterious stuff to do in
Vegas. But the problem is the potential for bad decisions that surrounds you well,
and the fact that you have to walk through the asthma of bad decisions.
Yes, that's what I mean. Like you will and inevitably you will
do bad things for the pressing that you need to leave. Yeah. I
just don't like gambling that much. Yeah, I like the circus circus.
It's so fucking weird the worst. It's really bad. They were like a
bunch of murders there years ago, or not a bunch, but there were.
There were a couple. Uh yeah, it was just like in the
hey day of organized crime or no, I mean yes, the nineties.
Yeah, so yeah, I don't know, it's it's a dark, dark
place. Uh all right, I'm gonna give you guys like ten minutes or
less if you don't need to talk about PCs and whatever. Okay, Jeff
wants to build new PC, right, Yeah, there are new video cards
out. You still have that thing we built for you attested years ago.
Yes, I the yes, I the PC that we built, and yes,
upgrading video cards so it's up to a nine eighty now. I have
probably put some RAM in an SSD in it. I got thirty two gigs
a RAM and that thing it's got ans D. Okay, Uh, there's
something about me and RAM. I just if the slots are there, I
want to fill the slots. Did you just did you just know what I'm
saying. Carve half of that out and make a RAM disc out of it.
At a certain points, it's not worth that unless you're doing something real.
If you need a scratch disc for premiere or something, then it's maybe
worth it. But most people, so I do. I do audio stuff,
uh, and so I end up loading enough plugins in some projects that
the RAM starts to make sense. You can, like if you're using isotope
heavy or even like audition or logic or something like that. Logic some MEC
only, but you can use enough RAM with the audio. Yeah, I'm
loading enough stuff that is it does fat loops. Yeah, it ends up
being more than sixteen and something. Yeah, okay, fair enough. So
what so you want to you build the gaming PC? It's time and and
yeah. So I've got this machine. It's it's served me well and it's
still is fine for the vast majority of games. But with uh, you
know, the encroachment of VR with kind of of me running or a monitor
that's higher than ten eighty and just kind of looking at where games are going.
It seems like also also ripping my DVD collection to having a take too
long. You know, they're like a lot of different factors here, gaming
and non gaming that make me think it's probably time. Okay, So you
want to do DVD ripping, you want to do video games VR and some
audio stuff. Yeah, okay, and you're gonna use your audio interface from
your old machine, I assume, Yeah, yeah, that's that Stuff's all
just use the primarily at the point, it's not that the big cold do
so on the DVD Blu Ray ripping front, more cores is better than faster
cores. Yeah, so I have a hexachor and I can rip a Blu
Ray in like an hour and a half two hours. DVDs take like eight
minutes. Now, it's crazy fast. I would probably be willing to sacrifice
some of that if it meant for better gaming stuff. So I was still
thinking quad core, but I don't know. So you can get a cheap
hexacore like the like the three hundred to five hundred dollars hexacor if you're looking
at that five hundred dollar price point, you won't lose too much gaming performance
because most of the games don't hit CPUs all the way. Are those are
those even consumer facing products or is that enterprise level? But there? So
the thing you want to avoid is the zons. So the zons are those
cores fucked really slow for like data center use. You don't want that,
you want like the mid range, and I didn't, I didn't come prepared.
Yeah, but there's a there's a five hundred dollars hexacore that the only
problem with that is they need to buy a next ninety nine board instead of
the cheaper boards. So you're buying quad But the good news is you get
quad channel memories, so you get a lot more memory bandwidth. So like
there's a trade off. The motherboard's going to be fifty or one hundred bucks
more expensive, probably your CPU will be a little bit more expensive. But
you're, like I said, your Blu ray ripping time is is way way
low. Sure, it's a totally valid choice to say I don't give a
fuck about that, and I'm gonna I think I think I might go that
route because there's a finite number of discs I need to rip, so at
some point, I'm I'm about halfway through this project, so like, at
some point that will be done. I need to give you my my descripting
image, right, Yeah, so you look like box or something, And
dude, I have a folder that I put ripped mkvs for make MKV into
and then like two hours later a completely ripped iTunes size movie comes out nice
without having to do anything, and then that just goes into PLEX and I
have my own, my own Netflix. Yeah. So that's the other thing.
Is I this existing PC that I have, I'm probably just going to
keep up and running as a PLEX server. I've got like two I've got
three two gig drives in it or sorry to terabyte drives in it, and
an ssd uh. I might just get a four terabyte to throw in there
as well, But but generally it's okay on size, especially once I get
everything off of it onto this other game. I need a cheap video card,
right because you don't want to run a night like you don't want to
run a big gaming video card. So I have a nine eighty right now,
so I think I might just move that out of this machine into the
new one and not just go buy a ten eighty right now and just kind
of wait for wait for that ten eight to feel old enough to where,
you know, I get a ten to get a ten eighty at that point
or if they yeah, well they'll do a clock bump, uh process shrink
probably at one point, like a year or eighteen months from now. Yeah,
and you're nine eighties. Fine, yes, you're not going to suffer
even with your greater than AP resolution monitor right until like the third wave of
VR stuff starts coming out. Yeah, okay, so mid range quad core,
whatever amount of memory you need, get an motherboard that is reviewed.
Well, I've just been going to PC part Picker and Prime, like I've
picked like the processor that's seemed like an I seven sixty seven hundred K seemed
like the way to go. That seems right. I mean, that's the
best quad core you can get. Skylake. Yeah, that's Skylake. That's
what that's what you want, and that's the overclockable one. You don't even
have to get the K if you don't want it. Yeah, you can
save a fifty ye hundred bucks by not getting the K version, because like
you're not going to overclock realistically. Well, so I ended up putting this
cooler man, I know I'm not this cooler Master. There was a that
wasn't the h one hundred eye is pre built water cooled things, the courser
because they're quiet. Yeah, so I'm quiet is nice? Like you you
recommended that fractal design define our five cases are great use forested builds. Yeah,
that's that's an awesome case. It's super quiet like so, so having,
especially in an environment where I may be recording audio, having a quieter
PC is really nice. I will I will say. I So I've got
a sixty seven hundred K and I've got what is the cool Master? Do
you think that everybody gets its two twelve two twelve I've got one of those,
and that thing runs so cool already that I can't tell that PC is
on when it's idle. It's it's like I don't think the fan even runs.
It throttles itself significantly, and even at even at high load, like
I could barely tell that things on. So one of the things that I've
noticed lately with Windows ten and VR stuff is that I think Steam VR is
the one that does it. It cranks you from the balanced profile to the
high performance Valery was doing that? Is that? And is that what's doing?
Valkyrie did that, and then the problem they had early on is it
didn't switch you back when you stopped playing the game everything, which so like
I ended up ref form adding because everything was fucking pegged at one hundred percent
even when I wasn't doing the R stuff. I was like, well,
my shit is fucked. What's going on? Yeah, and I was had
some sort of virus. Yeah, yeah, I was, Well I thought
that I just you know, because I have this, I have a processor
that triggers the dumb oculus like your PC does not meet these requirements. So
I was like, well, shit, I guess it really doesn't because even
doesn't run for shit. And then after the format it has happened that I
formatted right around the time that they apparently fixed their shit, and oh wait,
Eve actually runs fucking perfect. Well it's not a problem. But the
funny thing is like that actually makes a difference now because when it's in maybe
balance is okay, but but quiet is not. When I'm running in quiet,
I don't peg seventy frames sixty frames a second, and Overwatch like I
have the little this stuff corner. I was just feels fucking framing when something's
really bad with my computer. And then I switched it back to the balanced
or high performance profile, and all of a sudden everything was good. So
even if you have a CPU controlled fan, yeah, and you switch back
and forth between balance and high, even with the water cooler, it's going
to crank the fan up on that, which is like, I have that
water cooler. It's annoy it does that, but but I don't know that
it's avoidable, and I don't I don't I have If anybody knows how to
fix it, I would love to know, like posting comments or Twitter or
something, because because it's it's making me a little crazy. I just switch
manually all the time. Okay, what else you got? What kind of
SSD you going for? This is? I put a one tearabyte SSD on
there. The five twelve is not big enough for all of the audio stuff
I end up installing. Uh And so as a result, I've offloaded most
of my games to not an SSD, which seems to be defeating the purpose
of having an SSD. But it's just been how it's how it's going.
How much sure of those, now is it? Like, so there's an
eight forty, same thing, eight forty that is four hundred bucks. I
think it's one of the Satas six g ones. So it uses a satur
interface what you probably want for your c drive since you're gonna buy everything else
nice. Yeah, is an mvmme drive Okay, that basically is the low
level interface between the motherboard and the CPU and the hard drive. And he
uses PCI Express lanes instead of like an intermediary part of all. So the
bottleneck is less about the interface between the drive and the computer and the speed
of the flash memory on. So this doesn't even like this doesn't even go
into a drive bay at this point. This like plugs into a slot or
get ones that plug into a slot there, Like I have one of those
in my computer home. It's a fucking nightmare, really, just I built.
When I built that machine, it was still a super raw, brand
new spec even even back in January when I've built mine, it seemed like
there were some weird compatibility issues between certain boards and certain drives there. So
there's there's two ways you can plug those in. There's you can get an
M two like one of those most most high end motherboards have an M two
slot. Now that will be either SATAH six G whatever that speck is,
or MVMI. And I think some of them even switched back and forth.
I don't know how. I like, I'm I'm out of this world right
now. There's also a thing called SATA. There's another spec that's like a
wide SATA cable does the same thing. Yeah, just just don't don't go
buy a Sata six G drive now if you're doing this from scratch, right,
because like you, you don't you want the bottleneck to be the memory
on the drive, not the mix up. So Intel makes one, it's
the Intel one's expensive, Samsung's I think the eight fifty series is MVMME.
So you want to get that unless it's like if it's a shipload cheap,
or go for the cheap one, right right. If it's if it's like
fifty bucks more, one hundred bucks more, maybe go for the NBA Okay,
all right, good to know. And then and then that also lets
you do all day the fancy bias. So you but so you don't see
you know, you don't see the text screens. You just it goes straight
to like a mouse and keyboard face and all that stuff, And that all
means it will boot a lot faster into Windows because it doesn't have to load
all the legacy bio stuff. If you have the nvame thing, that's neat
Okay, And then I threw a Western Digital black four terabyte in there as
a secondary drive, and I would probably add those to taste over time as
the prices go down. One four terabytes probably enough for now, considering I
would be leaving this existing machine up as a plexbox. I don't need to
then copy over all my music and movies and all the other ship. I'll
just leave that on that machine and access it remotely. When you look at
drives, one of the things that I like to do is look at wire
Cutter and back blaze. They both they do fail rates, and they vary
wildly, even inside like Western Digitals four terabytes, right, the OEM lens
will have a really high fail rate and the consumer ones will have a lower
vice versus. So look at specific mode convers the Okay motherboard. You know,
I just at this point, I just picked one that was compatible and
was well reviewed on PC part picker. So it's this gigabyte GA was this
Z one seventy X. Is it the XPSL I buy any chance, because
that's what I have. The LGA eleven fifty one. That's the socket.
The socket sized Gaming seven is what it says. So that's I think that's
a higher end one than mine. Mine was like one fifteen. One's two
hundred. Okay, that's that's like three models above what I have. And
that's one of those things where I don't actually know how much mother board I
need, to be honest, that's probably way too much. Probably don't The
one. The one that I've got has got like USB three point one ports
and a top and a Type C port on it, like it's it's already
got a bunch of io ship. Yeah, I probably want to check the
ports because I'm definitely gonna need I mean, ideally it would have like at
least four USB three ports on it. Four USB three. Also also you
can get like it has headers for like four more USB three and you can
get like ten dollars headers because at this point I'll be, you know,
like I've got an Oculus hooked up to this thing now. H So,
once Touch comes out, I will need three USB three's just for that stuff.
Yeah. Yeah, even a even a cheaper or cheaper board will totally
cover you there. Well, So the place that things get weird is when
they don't have enough USB three root hubs. So like my old X ninety
nine board has two USB three controllers. One's like a as Rock or some
third party brand, one's the Intel one. The Intel one doesn't have enough
root hubs to have Logitech webcam for streaming the Vibe camera and then the two
Oculus cameras plugged in all at the same time without running out of bandwidth.
So like, like, I don't know that anybody realistically he's going to keep
a Vibe and a rift plugged in all the time. Yeah. No,
My room is not even enough for a Vibe, So there you go.
So I wasn't thinking about like what if I got a smaller case, but
I'm because I was thinking if I do end up with a Vibe, I've
got a room picked out, but it is at the other end of the
house. So it becomes like, okay, I might have to move this
PC around so with the handle, Yeah, I know, but I just
I don't think I need a handle. I'm not looking to build a GameCube's
allow these things. Yeah, I don't want a looud case. This thing's
quiet and realistically, I'm not going to move it that often. That one
kind of has handles on the end. It has like Mackie doesn't. Yeah,
it's it's easy to handle, like I, you know, I would
take it outside to blow up the dust out of the case and stuff.
It's it's fine moving that thing around. Ram I ended up sixty four gigs
g skill riped Jaws. Is that on the list for that motherboard? It
is? Yeah, And that's a d D four twenty eight hundred, which
seemed like those numbers seemed high for twenty It will go higher. I've seen
suggestions that with this the latest round of Skylakes, the memory band with actually
matters more than it used to do. Anything about that will yeah, I
don't know. I seemed like some conflicting benchmarks out there saying I have the
bandwidth on the memory you buy actually makes a difference in frame rates now,
But I can't imagine that that is really the case unless you're doing crazy stuff,
right, Yeah, I'm not necessarily gonna do that much crazy stuff,
but somewhat crazy stuff. Yeah, I don't know, Like I think I
think that is. I think that is the brand of ram I have right
now. Uh look, get the cheapest stuff that's on the list. That's
going to be the the clock speed pre CPU. Yeah, that's the that
should be the goal there, unless you're if you're gonna overclock there, all
bets are off right. I've made a place in my life where I value
stability and reliability much much more than a two percent or ten percent faster performance.
Yeah. Like, I had my stuff overclocked a little bit for a
while, and so I guess like I you know, I didn't realize that,
but my existing processor will overclock itself automatically as needed. Said, Yeah,
is that different? Okay, So so the way the way the old
process, like you're Sandy Bridge, I think the twenty K. Yeah,
so it would crank up. If you're using only one core, it'll turn
off the other cores are cranking way down and crank the other one episode.
It basically reallocates the thermal capability of okay CPU. Yeah, okay, so
that'll get it over what it's like base like. Yeah, but it's still
within spec. Intel expects it to do that. Okay, So all right,
and going stock cooler will work and all that. Yeah, okay,
letters and number. Yeah you sign at last, see that you have?
Now are you looking forward to when your PC is too old? I know
I have a nine eighty. That's what I know about my piece. It's
pretty good. I have several USB ports. Okay that you were blacklock blue
two black on top and then some other ones in the back. Okay,
blue ones are the good ones. Yeah, I heard that, So I
put all the more important things in the blue one. My three point one
poor is red. Oh wow, yeah, it gives you extra power.
Yeah, it's cool. It's yellow. So the only other thing is when
you do Windows you're going to buy a disc copy of Windows ume or USB
thumb driver or something with it on it. I mean yeah, at this
point, I guess I would have to unless if I can get all this
done by the end of July, I could probably drum up a Window seven
key somewhere in my collection of the upgrade route. So when you the only
trick is when you install the Okay, so if you do the Windows seven
upgrade, you have to install it, then upgrade to Windows ten, then
wipe it, then get a version of the Windows ten installer. That's for
the that's not the bios legacy version, and that's for the new stuff,
right, or that you do the fast boot because otherwise it'll always fire the
bios and the This is something I only have like, like, well,
you've done this build right lately, right, Yeah, if you your bios
and your OS talk to each other in the it's not called the bios anymore.
And I can't for it's right, Yeah, the EFI, the U
e FI stuff talks to the Windows in a way now that is in track.
I have no fucking clue how that works. It's some dark wizardry.
It took three tries installing Windows ten on this machine for it to get to
for because of the n V and ME stuff and because of the U e
Fi stuffing, because I was a dumbass and wanted to do the UFI boot
and not the BIOS boot. Yes, so I went through that process when
I was formatting this PC, where I thought I could just do a like
when I went through the like install Windows ten fresh, because I was coming
off of the fast ring built the Windows ten which is a bad place to
be yeah, and I was like fuck this, man, I can't do
this anymore, Like I just I need to know that this is the Windows
that everyone else is running. It's just irresponsible. So I went through that
process and it was like, oh no, man, you can't. Like
I'd installed at USB and I went through try try to install it, and
it was like, you can't install this partition yeah, like okay, well,
I guess I need to repartition the drive yet then and formatted C yeah,
and then was like, oh, I guess I'm dragging out one of
my old PCs now and downloading fucking Windows ten and burning it to a disc
because that's how I have to install it. Because it will not install off
USB. You can make a Uefi USB key, but the process to do
that was fairly significant. Charge yeah. Yeah. So this just this was
the shortest solution I could come up with, was find this PC that was
still running Windows ten going up on my network when it was seven. Rather
Yes, it had a burner in it, and I'd have discs everywhere because
everyone bought discs when they were cheap and then realized they never needed to burn
discs anymore. And so I was able to get it done, but it
was just it added like nine hours to this process, and I was like,
oh, this went from very easy to now like I'm sitting in here
all day just kind of pouting, went fuck man, fuck bloss a whole
fucking day. So when I when I installed in this new machine, I
used the Microsoft's just got a like make a dootable USB Windows ten Installer utility.
That's what I did. Use that. Yeah, so you're your older
machine. Probably I assume introduced some weird compatibility stuff there, but they didn't,
so they didn't say anything to me about like, oh you need the
Uefi version of this they were talking about. But so my machine, now
the guy like machine, from hitting power to being at the Windows desktop is
like maybe fifteen seconds. It's oh yeah, completely nuts. But also like
I get the gigabyte like your's. You're on a gigabyte motherboard splash screen looking
thing with the text or just a picture. No, no it's not.
It's not the old school post with like the eighty eighty columns looking text.
It's like a nice graphical gigabyte logo and everything. And then the Windows ten
like animation, booting animation blends with that. Yeah, like they are the
same screen like the motherboard like post like the nice looking motherboard logo and the
Windows ten boot animation all the same thing. Sad disabled this logo because I
want to see some gritty ass graph so I can't get that anymore. That's
what like, Like turning that logo off does not give me the old looking
PC screen gone. Yeah it's not. There's nothing there except for like a
text prompt that says like hit the leat for setup. And but yeah,
like seeing those two things together is like the OS and the motherboard were the
same thing. At a certain point, it was a weird thing. My
motherboard lets you replace the motherboard logo with whatever you want. Cool, that's
awesome. Like its pornography, okay, all right, so hard core pornography.
Yeah, I was picking locks man. Yeah, and then you see
the little dots, the spinning dots, and then Knit's in Windows. It's
really good. Yeah, so you're like you're on the right track. This
is good stuff. Just the motherboard is the only place you can really go
wrong. Don't buy a cheap, off brand motherboard if you're planning to use
this machine for a long time. Yeah, that's that. My plan is
to do this once and then not have to like like I did get you
got five years out exactly, Yeah, with you know, relatively minor upgrades,
like I had some RAM go bad and put a video cards. Yeah,
a couple of video cards. Don't cheap out on power supply. Yeah,
so I ended up picking it's a brand. I mean, it's an
e v GA, which is a brand name, I guess. But I
picked a seven hundred and fifty What which is for this power profile? For
what I've built here is like four hundred and thirty watts, So I fear
a seven fifty would cover it. Yeah, that's probably is fine for one
video going forward. Probably. Yeah, I'm not gonna I'm probably never going
to be an SLI guy. It's like SLI. There's a really limited set
of circumstances where SLI makes sense. If you have a really if you have
an older video card, you can get a second card for almost nothing,
right, kind of that's a good idea. You should never unless you're driving
like three monitors that are four K or something idiotic. You don't need SLI.
Don't buy SLI from the get go. Yeah, I've got two monitors.
It's fun. Yeah, yeah, you well, I don't want to
get too deep into the stuff. You might want to look at thee soonic
power supplies. There by far the stable power supplies on the market as far
as I know, they're not that quiet always. I've got one at home.
It's it's okay, it's been totally. Like I said, I can't
tell that machine is on. So the thing people ever look at power supplies
is that steady voltage is just as important as like total Weiland efficiency is important.
It's important thing too. So you can look at that power rating,
the gold, silver, platinum thing, and I like, I don't think
it's worth spending money on platinum for normal people at home. The gold and
silver you'll want because it basically it's a measure of how much of the energy
goes in comes as AC comes out as DC on the other side. And
and you want to be like eighty or higher, okay, because and that
is that what the rating is, So like it would gold eight or high
silver gold is ninety or something. I don't remember the exact math, but
okay, but that's the jist. You good, no, okay, real
fast, because I'm sure a lot of people's eyes of glaze over at this
point. How do you feel about the current state of GPUs. We get
We've gotten a lot of people writing in since the since the tenadies came out,
and the radio on four eighty is happening at a pretty low price,
and so like people keep asking like, hey, why don't you guys talk
about GBUS and I don't know that we are. The answer is, like
a podcast, I'll buy a ten eighty when they're available and when it makes
sense to you. But if you have any thoughts on that that you want
to, so the four eighty seems to be the go to, Like it
seems to like the cheap option now, right, especially if you want to
like a VR MEN'SPEC capable machine. I talked about this on another podcast a
couple of weeks ago, but like, the the interesting thing right now is
that that Oculus and Vibe shared MEN'SPEC for for minimum VR hardware the nine seventy
and whatever CP you and all that has made a really interesting spot. So
now there's a target for like minimum viable that's actually a pretty good computer on
the PC side, and it means that there's gonna be a min like that's
gonna be the floor for your awesome looking PC game experience for the for going
forward. So I think as long as you get something that's better than a
nine seventy, and like I wouldn't buy a nine seventy to day, That
four eighties seems like a good card, but I haven't tested it or used
it at all. Then the ten sixty specs got out there, Yeah,
yeah, I don't know about that one. Yeah, it sounds like it's
about on the level of the ft eighty and they're both they're both roughly in
the nine eighty ballpark or two hundred two hundred. Yeah, yeah, it
sounds like the ten sixties is gonna get down there. That seems like a
really good place to be if you want to have a machine that you can
that that gives you a lot of options in the future. And the big
question always is, you know, when you're specking out a machine, you're
picking out a video card, do you buy the expensive ass video card and
plan to keep it for longer, or do you buy the half price video
card and just upgraded every other year or every eighteen Right, I think I
would rather like spend it all up front and then not worry about it.
That's kind of how I've always been with this stuff, Like if you if
you look at it as a five or six year upgrade cycle for the CPU
and motherboard, maybe you add RAM, you upgrade storage as you need it,
and then maybe like three or four years in you get a video card
or you know that you're then going to carry on to your next yeah build
or something. Then that's then that's an okay place to be and that's a
good strategy. The other the other strategies equally valid, right, Like getting
into video card every other every other year that costs half the price of that
big one. You end up spending the same amount of money. It's it's
it's how It's really about what kind of monitor you have and how how easy
is it for you to spend five hundred dollars versus two hundred dollars. Yeah,
like if you're running a ten eighty monitor and I think most people are
still running into an a video card you have? Yeah, at this point,
like whatever do you think that we'll get to a point where we start
to name them inspecs again, let's get back to MPC. This is this
an Windows experience? Yeah, where's my Window Experience number here? It's like
thirty five now probably right? Awesome, yeah, that seems high. No,
there there is some kind of VR is that doesn't the vibe have like
you're an eleven or something like that. I don't know. I think there's
I think they have a VR spec number somewhere. I mean that bull.
The thing that matters is you have I mean, look, my computer is
virtual number is bigger than your computers. Yeah, yeah, that shit's dumb,
all right, computers. Hey, did you guys talked about to talk
about the Xbox Preview the experience we had a little bit. I saw a
demo of it. I haven't used it, I haven't installed. Even using
it, it's there are still things about that OS that just are too clunky,
like pushing to the left and hoping that the log in thing is supposed
to pop out, and then it just takes too long. There are too
many things about that OS just in general, like even on the non Preview,
the just aren't snappy. It acts, It acts like it doesn't keep
parts of itself in memory. It acts like a computer. Yeah, it
feels like it has It feels like it has to thrash the hard drive to
load parts of the interface in from time to time, and that's not fun.
Especially if you have a lot of games, because I know we really
all have a ton of backwards compatible Yeah, but I think my list is
like if I have nothing installed, I think the ready installed to install list
is like two hundred and six. Yeah, the games and app stuff takes
four ever populated. Mine's only like fifty because I'm not, you know,
in the same I'm a normal person. I buy my games like it still
takes fucking forever. It took three hours to download Inside on Friday night.
Because of that, Wow, Like, I thought there was something wrong with
the console. So I went and opened the door in the little case that
it's in and like did the long press reset to clear this system cash and
all that stuff. It's still really really slow, so it could have been
preview. I don't know. I'm download speeds on both consoles, Like like
PSN is markedly worse than Xbox most of the time. PSN is like embarrassingly
slow for me most of the time. But I haven't experienced slow downloads with
they have just been Friday night. You know. What I did experience though
with this preview though, is that it was actually just not downloading well,
where everything was in Q and nothing was actually moving, so I had to
reset and and that's all fine. That was a specific They fix that one.
Yeah, I'm I'm talking. As soon as I can get out of
the preview thing on the Xbox, I'm out. I would just want an
Xbox. It works. I dished monthy times a year that I use it.
It's not worth the extra instability, like you said, it's I mean,
but the thing is is is having multiple Xbox ones in the house,
like one that is not in a preview program, that one is still not
great. And when it comes to like just snappiness, just feel of the
interface and stuff like, I feel like that. It's why I didn't like
build an XBMC box or like a Cody Box whatever and on an Uya or
something, you know, because it's like I can't fucking handle slow interface.
It's why it's part of why I unsubscribe from Direct TV because those boxes just
weren't fucking snappy. Well, this is why, this is why I have
a giant ass free en Ass box instead of a shitty Nass box in my
garage. Right, I have an old Hexacore PC running free Nass because I'm
an idiot. Yeah, it's probably costing thirty dollars a month in electricity,
but it's fastest, fast as shit. Yeah, perfect, yea, yeah,
yeah, the speediness of an interface. I think that like the and
that Xbox one interface is is bad for that stuff. That's you know,
like the PS four just feels like its stores more of its interface just right
there. Random that's not trying to do as much and a lot of interface
is not a bad. Interface is not a bad thing. Yeah, when
it comes to just like I need to launch a fucking game, just list
the goddamn game. Yeah yeah, but when I list my library on a
PS four, that still takes forever and sucks. But it's also bad,
still bad as bad though it's pretty bad. You can see even the library
on the PS four is terrible. Games quicker than not online. I don't
know what's going on. You scroll down and then wait for its populate because
you have to scroll it down and go like this is probably where s is,
and then let off. You can you can scroll twice as fast as
that thing can populate games on that list, and then you just like I
feel like it still it doesn't show number of letters are where you are,
no indication and stuff's terrible. It's really bad. I did stream all of
inside to my Windows ten PC, so I played that on the PC,
streamed across the network wired and it was like that worked really well. So
that's cool. My Pcmxbox one are practically touching, so I don't actually need
to do that. TiVo is still connected to my Xbox one because wow,
you know i'd have to rent cables to fix that. Sure. Yeah,
all right, that was way longer than ten minutes. This concludes this week's
tech talk. Sorry, no, it's fine. I love that stuff.
Next week it's the audience Android and we're gonna get into it. Okay.
I have pulled roughly double the number of emails that I usually get, two
times the email. We'll see. We'll see how many did we get through
here. BombCast at giant bomb dot com is the email address. First email
comes in from Zach from Louisville, Kentucky. You look stern down there wouldn't
be there next week. Yeah, we kept next next week. What are
you doing there? I can't talk about it. Eating something, maybe eating
something, eat drinking? Eating? Okay, that's cool, enjoy uh I
Bomb Squad. When I was growing up in the eighties, my friends and
I referred to finishing a game as flipping it, as in I flipped Ninja
Guide in this weekend. Also, if it was the eighties, I'm surely
calling it ninja gaiden. Today. When I tell people we said this,
they look at me like, I Am crazy? Was this an actual term?
Or did my friends and I just pull this term out of our ass?
That one said that's an actual term? What really have you heard that?
Flipping arcades because you're you're beating boards, you're rolling it over when you
when you would beat all of the Donkey Kong stages and get it back to
the start, would be a rollover. Ok okay, so you would flip
it? Uh? So that that is definitely. There are trophies that are
that mentioned. Flipping was like did the nuclear Throne trophies do it? There's
something that came out recently. There was some roguelike that was like flip the
game as like a term for beating it and restarting and continuing. But yes,
no, that is, Yes, that is a term. But also
you're crazy. There's there's a new idea, there's a new arcade a documentary
coming out, isn't there did I see this? I saw Billy Mitchell on
a YouTube video last Weekly and in Walter from Walter Walter Day talking about rolling
over Jungler oh Man, all right, a billion points, getting getting into
the deep gritty forty five hours Jesus, Yeah it was animated. Yeah,
that's ridiculous. Sorry. Also, Zach Zack asked what we called finishing a
game? Beat a game as kids. Yeah, I've been beating in a
game. It's usually what we said, go with the Occasionally, occasionally you
would hear somebody say they have solved a game. That sounds yes, kids
were bad people. I can't. I can't get on. If it's Raiders
of the Lost Ark for the twenty six hundred, you could say you solved
it. Wow, that's it. Yeah. Rain from Reading in the UK
right soon and says Dan touched on this in the most recent Rhythm Heaven Quick
Look. He stated he was unable to complete a review of a Rhythm game
due to not being able to get past an early stage. I've been wondering
about this for a while. What do you do when you're reviewing game that
you cannot complete for whatever reason, especially if it's pre release and there are
no facts available. That's the only time it's happened to me, and I
just I just went to my boss at the time and I said, I,
this game is not for me. I don't have any rhythm. I
can't beat this many game with these monkeys on a clock and monkeys on the
clock. Many game was fucking tough. By the way, It's good to
know that I'm not that terrible. Was it a Rhythm Heaven game or a
different it was? It was the wee Rhythm Heaven, which actually I have
been playing the new one on free ds and I'm better at that for sure.
But yeah, I just had to go to and be like, hey,
I can't honestly review this game because I'm not This is not for me.
I'm not gonnable to meet it. I can't. I can't think of
a situation where I'd ever ran up against something I just could not get past.
But I have. I can't remember the game specifically, but I do
remember on behalf of other reviewers, I had contacted a publisher and said like,
hey, our reviewer is stuck here and and you know, kind of
keeping some separation, not having the reviewer talked directly to the company just kind
of middle manning that conversation and being like, Okay, this is the situation
they're having. Do you have anything about this? Because you get to a
point with something depending on the game, depending on the game, where you
start to wonder like is this me or is the game broken in totally?
That is really hard. It's a really hard game. Like you you just
don't know it's very much. Am I missing something here? Or have I
encountered a bug? Or is the game fucking up here? And there's no
way to check because there's no information right online about yeah game at all.
So that stuff's hard. I It's happened to me twice I played. I
found a bug in Hexan two, I guess the one in like ninety nine
that basically it broke the save right and I had to go back and restart
the game. But that was a conversation that was like you sent a note
to Activision and hey, what's like, what's do you guys know about this?
And they actually hadn't. They didn't know about that, they didn't have
the bug listed. So then they fixed it in the first patch and I
had to restart my my game from the beginning. Uh yeah, I found
bugs in Canan Lynch two, which was a weird one bugs, but that
is reviewing that I I apparently ended up playing more of that game than the
people who tested it or something, because it was like it got to a
point where on the three sixty, if you got a lot of shotgun kills,
like it was. It was it was testing to see if you would
have got enough shotgun kills for an achievement or something, was what I think
I was eventually told. And it would that would build up to a point
where if you got a shotgun kill, the game would halt for about two
seconds and then resume. And it was just fucking crazy, and like the
game's not out and I'm sitting here on this thing, I'm like, fuck
shit, like I'd recorded footage of it because I'm like, this is a
really boo not again, yeah kind of, it's a real this is a
real weird problem with this game. Like well, and I ended up going
back to the guy who was doing PR four at the time saying like,
hey, so I've got video of this. Uh, this is happening to
me. What the fuck? And they're like, yes, we very much
want to see that video. And then and then they still yeah exactly.
Then they started working. They ended up fixing that bug, I guess,
and a pretty early patch. I reviewed an Earth Defense Force game for OXM
once. Those are easy. You just put it in for five minutes ago,
Man, this sucks and give it like the lowest score you can.
Like. I like those games. They dumb and they're fun, but they
get really hard. Yeah they do, and some of them do. Yeah.
Like I got to the end of it, I was like, I
can't. I just can't get past this boss, and so I hinted one
of the other people at the magazine and they plowed through that part and then
I finished the game. Wow. Yeah, there are plenty of times there
would be a game like like The Witness is a good example. I didn't
review it, but I could totally see that being one of the games that
if I was reviewing, like, well, yeah, you could do the
seven hundred puzzles or whatever, or you could do four hundred and fifty and
beat it the standard way. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, I mentioned that
in the review for Completion is whatever. Trying to remember I think I had
finished eight of the areas and then beat the game before to the review.
But yeah, I mean talking about it before that last area of that game
on the deadline was not Oh yeah, that not an ideal experience. How
how did you handle like Splunky and Rogue Legacy and stuff like that. I
don't think we reviewed any of them, you know, I think Patrick reviewed.
Yeah, but I mean in cases like that, I mean, you
know, yeah, I mean a certainly point, it's meant to be petable
and stuff like that, So finishing the game is probably not actually that key
to it. It's just understanding how the mechanics work and is it fair and
is it fun? At some point it's like a fighting game almost like it's
meant to be like repetitive. It's meant to be something that you kind of
grind against for for a good long time. So it's sort of a different
situation than like a story driven game. That makes sense. Yeah, So
I think that there are there are definitely cases like that where you like,
you probably don't need to finish Splunky to review to tell someone why Spilunky is
so cool. Yeah, I think it varies from the game to game.
I will say I am glad that I never had a review to the Necord
answer, have you finished that game? No, no, I didn't.
I still I keep going back to it for like fifteen twenty minutes at a
time, a couple of times a week. I don't know that I will
ever finish that game if you did, if you got in his own four,
I think I got to the end of three. Okay, Zone four
I think is way too hard for its own game. I've gotten to the
last boss once out of like maybe a hundred runs. It is really hard,
but like that's my that's my Splunky ratio. Probably yeah, but yeah,
you know, we're in a different situation than than we have been in
years past. I mean, you know, like we're not really trying to
be this like day one review like workshop, right, so you know,
it affords us the ability to pass on some reviews or run a review way
late yea, which endst to a lot of weird introspection about like, well
we're like the selection process for what we review suddenly becomes like this weird thing.
Definitely, Well, maybe our scores are skewing higher than they used too
because we're only reviewing stuff we're really interested in, or but that then ends
up going the other way of like I was really interested in a game and
then it ended up being really disappointing. Like you know, I approached like
something like Quantum Break. I can't, I can't like I am yeah,
I am very interested in this game, and I hope it turns out.
Then you're like, oh man, I am super disappointed. That's the thing
that people don't seem to undertand when they're riding and go, why would you
review this game? You obviously hate it. It's like, why I review
this game because I like saw it beforehand, it said this looks awesome.
I wanted to play it, right. Uh So sometimes I pay putting me
in the ballpark of someone who might actually buy that game, right, which
is kind of the ideal situation, I guess. But it's more interesting when
their noteworthy, Like when it's a thing that you're it's a noteworthy title.
Yeah, Like, I'm much more interested to read a review when you give
a shit about the game going in, right, if it's just like,
here's a here this fell on my fucking desk today exactly. Yeah. Like,
and I've and we've both done. I have written hundreds of reviews that
are just like, this review needs to get done, and I'm going to
be the one to do it because I'm here and I'm qualified to do it,
and that's it's nice to not be tied to that anymore. That's a
weird that doesn't exist anymore, doesn't need to Jim from Atlanta or recent demo
Derby reminded me that Sony has had some cool slogans over the years. You
are not and then a red eh and living your world playing hours are some
of my favorites. But do you guys have any gaming slogans that you still
think are pretty cool or remarkably awful? Get in the game. I always
thought the Sony this his living stuff was really really dumb. Make madop believe,
make believe. Although that was a bigger Sony thing, wasn't. I
don't think that was just PlayStation. I think it was around just it was
like a yeah, it was just a Sony overall. Yeah. It was
the Bloggable, Yeah, the blogg Ex. That was flip Cam it was
it was. It was a flip competitor, I believe. I mean do
things like like print ad things like the Digatana thing. Count h. Yeah,
he's asking more for kind of like companies like Challenge everything, don't.
Yeah, like that type well that's more of it. That wasn't that was
more of an ad thing. Yeah, that was not really repeated slogan like
challenge everything is a great like literally and well I guess makedop Believe was not
in the games, so maybe like you are not ready though, and like
Ninten don't you're right and you're right because well they used I mean really it's
repetition more than anything. A slogan is like you were not ready was on
everything? Like what it like McDonald McDonald's has had slogans throughout the year.
I'm loving it. Yeah, I'm loving it. Is is the classic example,
right, yeah, right, I think you just see that. Oh
my heart. Mhm, it's one of their more recent ones. Didn't stick
with that one very Oh I idn't even heard that. Yeah, Taco Bells
had some good ones. Oh yeah, Live Moss Think outside then what was
the Border one? Run for the Border, Run for the Border. Yeah,
Live Moss is good. Uh, it's it's perfectly terrible. Yeah,
yeah, they're great. I feel like this like the Saturn Sega Saturn era
is where that stuff really got the peak terrible. Who was the ad with
ice cube with the Saturn rings around his head. Yep, yeah, it
was ice Cube with Saturn ice Cube did Saturday head. Yeah, it was
pre like kids movie ice Cube too, right, yeah, it was angry
ice Cube. Given the screw that was. That was not far panther dragoon,
motherfucker far removed not he was more panzer driven saga. Fair enough.
It's my understanding. He's getting a star on the Walk of Fame, is
he? Yeah? Right in that check huh as Yeah, exactly, as
is Dwayne the Rock Johnson. Of course, anyone deserved one, he does.
Question quick question from Jeff your dogs. Why no rumble mouses? I
had a rumble mouse once Logic Tech three series mouse with the with the haptic
feedback in like two thousand, mid two thousands probably, I don't know,
is before the I remember with dual shocks. Well before was the dual Shock
three. Yeah, but remember they motion owned the haptic pat oh right right,
yes, and there was there's no dual That's why it was just the
six axis six They didn't want to pay the license, ye, and then
they sucked it up and pay the license. Yeah, which was the right
choice. But they Logitech license that same company to build up a haptic mouse
and it was fucking awesome. So when you moved your mouse over, I
feel like I used one of the problems blue. Yeah, but like it's
some trade show. Probably put my hands on one. That's weird. No
one will ever buy one of these, but that's me. God, it's
so good. So you would move, you would mouse over like window edges,
and it would just bumped my car. Does that? It's yeah,
yeah, because you have stick in my car that is that like has that
same kind of haptick like guide you to the buttons sort of thing. Yeah,
and it's it feels good, so you could do it. You can
do it with the phones. Now theoretically you can do it with the trackpad
on like a Mac. They nobody's built the software yet. But it's like,
I super super liked having because you could go with much higher precision because
you could feel when you were on the spot. You didn't just have to
look at it right. Nobody ever used it in games. It was like
it was one of those things that like there were two games that came out
and it was always like you click the mouse and shook around like a machine
gun, and you're like, no, one wouldn't ever want to use it
for this, Let's gonna make your game worse. That was the The Microsoft
Joystick had that same kind of like sidewinder, yeah, where it had all
the feedback ship just shake around, feel like all the different settings. It
was really fun in the demo, but then in games it was terrible.
And the demo it was like it's a rocket launcher and you and you would
feel the joystick jerk back and then forward, and you're like, yeah,
like I'm shooting a rocket. That's badass, But fuck actually doing that in
a game, especially a competitive one where you're trying to be accurate all this
other stuff, like at some point that stuff, just the experience gets in
the way of your precision. So I have to say I've looked in the
post VR world. I looked at those speakers that you screw into your chair.
The butt kicker, Yeah, because there's a there's a certain appeal,
uh like to be sitting in your chair and all of a sudden you feel
the rumble of the engines of your spaceship or whatever D box for the home.
I yeah, I sat in some so like pree three, went to
some events and played some games and sat in some dumb and looking fucking gaming
chairs, but they were kind of fucking comfortable on the floor in front of
the TV. No no, no, there's like like they did not have
speakers in them, but they did have like these big, gawky, like
just awful lumbar pillows in them, but they were kind of comfortable. Like
so this is already. I just went out and bought like a Razor mouse
and keyboard because of this specific like thing of like trying of of going to
downs and having that ship set up going like you know what, this mouse
actually feels pretty good, and this keyboard actually this mechanical I need to all
right, the clicky keyboards are great. I have one of those Logic tech
ones. It was way too expensive. I bought it and it's terrific.
And the lights change color when I mean games. And I bought it's a
death add or a death Widow chroma. Yeah whatever the fuck Razor keyboard?
Uh, and that has the ten key on it. The other one the
death adder, I think, doesn't I forget? Uh? And it's at
other than the part where when I type now it's all super loud. Uh.
It's the downside. It's a pretty good gaming keyboard. And the mouse
is actually pretty good too. Like I clown on Razor for like the way
that they market their products and a lot of their dumb fucking laptops and all
the other ship. But death, that's a nice mouse. It's a decent
amount. I have a Momba. It's a it's a it's a good ass.
It's wireless, it can be. I'm wired. Yeah. They do
a tournament edition of the Mamba that is just wired, okay, and it's
it's a it's a pretty good fucking mouse. You want to treat yourself,
get some little fancy go out there and grab an aluminum mouse pad. That's
what I have. Yeah, it's fucking awesome. That's what I use for
because I do it on my couch when I'm playing over one and it's aluminum,
so it doesn't bend or anything. It's just this tiny, thin little
thing because before I had to put my big gass Zelda book in my like
steel series like foam mouse pad on it. This razor thin little aluminum thing.
It's perfect. I love it. It's like twelve bucks or something.
It's so smooth. Yeah, and it's like a piece of glass that you're
gliding your mouse and when you get hand crud on there, Yeah, just
put in the dishwasher. Okay, it's awesomely no, I'm yeah, hand
crud's an issue. It's definitely an issue. Everybody hasn't say say no to
hand crud. Please, Uh, let's see. Manny from Cheltenham in England
wrote down and asking if Dan could elaborate a little on why he didn't like
Steep. I guess you kind of did that already and just yeah, it
just didn't It didn't feel good. It didn't feel fun like there's It felt
like Grabby many games, like I told you, and I don't know.
I SSX a lot because it just kind of felt bombastic and over the top
and you're landing like fireworks are going off, and it controlled really well.
It wasn't just spectacle. I thought the tricks worked really well. Steep just
it seemed like a game for people that are like way into actual skiing and
like watch a bunch of GoPro footage of people on YouTube skiing. It felt
like Skate rather than Tony Hawk. That's why I didn't like Skate, but
I love Tony Hawk. Tony Hawk was big and loud, and spectacle and
not realistic in any way. And I don't give a shit about skateboarding,
so that's why I didn't like skate But I like Tony Hawk in the same
way that I like SSX, but Steep seemed lame. M all right,
Well, a lot of people like skates so yeah, yeah, I know
I'm in the minority. Yeah, let's see, You're not the only person
I heard saying that Steep didn't wow them for a variety of reasons. So
I don't know. I heard one guy. I will say that Demo did
not grab me at all, and yeah, I but I also would not
be into a snowboarding game unless it was AMP three two Dark Summit too AMP
three two. Okay, Yeah, let's see. Don from California. I
was digging through the Steam sale decided I was going to grab super Hot,
but when I went to the store page, super Hot's recent reviews are quote
mix. It turns out that since the super Hot creators announced super Hot VR,
people went back and rereviewed the game in order to make the reviews look
worse because they weren't happy with a VR exclusive. How do you feel about
people using the review system this way? A dev of a game announces a
new game, time to go lower the review score of their previous game.
Okay, they announced the Kickstarter for super Hot after they showed it at the
Oculus booth at e three year GDC or something. Last you're talking about for
VR, No for the initial one, and they didn't tell people. The
implication was that that that was going to be the VR version of the game,
and the reasons for them releasing a separate VR version are good and fair
and right, but I like they message. They messed that up. You're
saying people thought they were going to get a VR game. The kickstarter who
bought back the kickstarter thought that they were getting the VR game. I thought
I backed the kickstarter, and I thought I was going to get a preview
build of the VR game that I could load up on my DK two as
soon as the kickstarter cleared, Okay, which I did not get. Okay,
I didn't realize they had ever said anything about it. I don't know
if they did, but it like, look, I'm a relatively informed consumer.
If I made the mistake, then like maybe their messaging wasn't awesome.
Sure, yeah, it's I. I didn't catch on to any of that
stuff. I just you know, we played that Web demo and thought it
looked cool awesome, so it never really seemed like it never really seemed like
a VR game, and the mechanics of that core super Hot game, I
think I actually would be really weird and bad in VR. So the idea
that they're building a separate thing that would give them the ability to maybe revisit
some of those concepts and make them fit better for VR. I feel like
I did a demo at a PAX or something of the just announced super Hot,
but I feel like before that, like a year past again. Yeah,
so the first time we saw a super Hot was that I think it
was at an Oculus booth, and I think it was it was either a
g DC or eighty three last year. Okay, because remember like the first
time I played Lucky, So it was one of those things where you go
into the booth, It's like here's this, here's this, here's this.
I'm like Lucky's Tale Eve Valkrie and I could have sworn I played super Hot,
and I mean it was it was very much one of those really levels
from like the Web demo e right, but it could have been just a
demo and you it was when you moved your head side decide that moved time
as well. Yeah yeah, so you but you could you could pull back
and watch the bullet go by vitational movement did nothing, so okay. But
yeah, Like, look, going back and fucking with people Steam reviews takes
money out of their pockets. So if ultimately, if you like them making
games, if you like the people that are making those games, and you
fucked their reviews up, you're going to cause them real problems. I think
that. But at the same time, I think you have to look at
user reviews as not a reliable source in aggregate or it's the best way to
go, well, accept it. Funnels like user reviews are one of the
things that determine your placement on Steam that much money makes so like it is
taking there is that direct link it is. It is really fucked up.
And the way they've redesigned reviews on Steam, like on the surface, you
look at it and go, oh, that makes sense because they adopted that
more of that Apple Store mentality of here are recent reviews of the current build,
and here are the overall all reviews and giving the different you know,
negative positive, like that makes sense. At the same time, you still
don't really know they've added Actually they've added some stuff where it says you user
got this product for free, which is a nice one they tell you,
and somebody is a confirmed buyer, which is also good like Amazon style stuff,
and tells you how many hours they put in, which is interesting and
you would think would combat that stuff. But at the same time, this
will sound super shitty coming from someone who's reviewed games for twenty years, because
I probably have some kind of vested interest in that status quo. But at
some point, the people out there, they know no code, they have
no reason to not go back and do this, They have no reason to
to kind of not funk around with that sort of stuff. I mean,
it's it's it's it's used as a form of protest in too many different contexts.
Yeah, ever, really that's useful that that's annoying because I think that
user ratings and reviews can be super valuable, but it's too volatile and too
many people use it to, you know, get across different messages that were
not that the systems were not built to support it. Frequently does it has
nothing to do with reflecting the quality of the product or the thing being reviewed,
right, And if people use the system like this, then it means
that just Valve and other companies that have storefronts like this will devalue the user
reviews, which is probably not good for anyone in a world where there are
like fifty releases on Steam every day, right, yeah, yeah, And
you know that's why you get into the ones that are like, well,
well you know this review has been voted as useful and that sort of stuff
like that can help combat that sort of stuff, but it just means you
can never trust this aggregate number. And I know, like Metacritic runs into
this all the time where you get just like tons of users going in and
voting everything a one for whatever fucking dumb reason because they're board U. It's
that same thing of like you can't look at those numbers. Like if you
can dig into the reviews and take all that feedback with a grain of salt,
you can learn things from the text, but you do have to do
some digging. It's not as simple as like mostly positive, I guess I'll
buy that, Like, you can't. You can't operate that way, just
you you'll get burned to time and time again. Uh, Josh wrote in
I said this on this week's BombCast. You kicked off by talking about pickup
trucks. As someone who lives in Kansas City. Yes, all right,
Drew has a pickup truck, right, that's right. As someone who lives
in Kansas City, the Missouri side, not the dirty Johnason County, Kansas
side County, I can say I heard it was the animo capital of the
armpit of the world. That's what said when he came to town. Yeah,
it makes sense. Who would have thought. Dino Bravo told me it
was the worst place on the planet got shut up for selling Canadian cigarettes.
Well, shit happens. Man. As someone who lives in Kansas City,
I could say that the number of people who own larger than needed trucks simply
for their looks or the effect of look, how big my truck is far
outweighs the people who own trucks for practical use or work vehicles. Also,
the Ford versus Chevy versus GM war is much worse than any kind of Sony
versus Microsoft console war could ever dream to be. I know no fewer than
six people who have either Ford or Chevy tattoos on their bodies and see several
more on a fairly frequent basis, just chiming in from the Midwest, and
they put a sticker in the window of your pickup truck. That's Calvin pissing
on a PlayStation logo. There you go. That's not even the worst weird
war in Kansas. In Missouri, I don't give a shit about college sports,
Blue and St. Lou That's what I do now. They just want
you to go when there was when the Royals play the fucking or Cardinals.
Yeah that I seventy war or whatever. So the Ku versus Missoo thing is
insane and I don't give a shit about sports at all, but it goes
beyond just this friendly sports thing. Like I had this friend Libby, who
is so obsessed with KU sports, Like I would ask for things like,
Okay, if somebody said we'll give you a million dollars if you put a
Miszoo Tigers a poster on your wall for a year, would you do it?
Like fucking no, no way, it was like a one a million
dollars, Yes, you would just take no. One completely serious, and
I believe she was serious. When we were getting on a plane from Vegas,
to Kansas City and she had a Ku shirt on, and the flight
attendant said, I'm like, oh, go Miszoo. You know it's like
a little like jab like rival sports team. Right, We're sitting on a
plane, an airplane very much post nine to eleven, that's probably like two
thousand and seven, and she's loudly saying she's so mad that there's a Miszoo
fan on the flight. She's like, fuck this, I hope this plane
goes down. I would help take this plane down if I could. I
would die so that person can die. Like I like, as we're taxing,
she's like, I want this plane to go down. I want everyone
on this plane to die. And this is a pretty sane girl. No,
actually no, this is not rare. This is not rare around there.
There are whole stores that everything they sell is muck fazoo and all this
stuff. Like if it's fucking insane, like I've seen people like, Okay,
when Miszoo was in town, people would be walking down mass Street like
families with Miszoo shirt. Can we just say, can I just like fucking
stop for a second say the word Missoo is maybe the dumbest fucking thing I've
ever heard, well Greg Miller that he went to Missoo. All right,
well whatever, but is it in Missouri? Is it short from Missouri?
Yeah? Well Missoo called the college that's in Columbia, the University of Missouri.
Okay, and so, like, if you're walking down Mass Street in
Missoo clothes, like I've seen people Miszoo bad, they sell Miszoo baz.
Can we start? That would be pretty good. You'll just approach a family
like, fuck you, get the funk out of my steake, Get the
fuck out of here. What the fuck do you think you're doing, Like
causing trouble just for supporting a team, actually wanting to fight people, wanting
planes to go down. It's it's fucking insane. There's some of that that
happens as a Northern California southern California thing. It's not the same. It's
yeah, it's not the same because it's not. Yeah, it's not necessarily
based on college sports, which is college sports seems like the most drunkenness and
violent of them. Yeah. Whatever. There there was like the Dodgers,
like the Giants, Dodgers stuff. There was that guy that got really fucked
up in la. I was very uncool. Uh but so like I went
to University of Tennessee and you know, we have rivalries there and and like,
I've been to stadiums where people through bodily fluids on you when you were
walking through the tunnels and it's just shitty. It's not it's not like urine.
But okay, like it's not. It's not ok either way. Yeah,
hey, is that the slogan? It's not okay sterile? Like yeah,
i'd prefer but you could drink it. But yeah, like it's not,
it's not, that's not. That's fucked up. I mean you hear
in friendly sports rivalry stuff, and I used to do my shit. This
will surprise no one that I hated college sports. So back in the day,
like I would change my Facebook profile picture if Miszoo was in town playing
Ku or the Tigers or whoever our fucking rival was. I would knew just
enough to know what teams people and Lawrence hated, So I would change my
fucking Facebook profile picture to the Miszoo Tigers and be like, hey go Miszoo.
And I did that until enough people were actually threatening to kick my ascid
bars, like really being like like my friends of mine being I'm not fucking
kidding. If you don't take that down right now, I'm gonna beat the
shit out you, like it is a super I mean, like you would
hear, like Justin Calvert told me for years, and like Danny would probably
say the same thing about like certain football matchups in England, they would effectively
route traffic for the different fans for the fans of the two teams through completely
different routes, so they just never even came to contact with each other because
otherwise it was just a recipe for like a brawl. Soccer violence makes sense
though, hooligans plus boots, sports and rivalry. Yeah, no, all
that shit just is the dumbest. Yes. I just remember every time k
you would lose, there would be guys. There's one big game, I
forgot what it was. Guys were throwing trash cans through a dorm windows.
Every girl on the floor was crying, and when Roy Williams said he was
leaving KU, just everyone was just destroy like just everyone's sobbing and screaming.
Guys are punching things and it's insane. Look, it's it's like college kids
protesting political shit. It always happens around exam time, right like people,
I'm kidding, but people you're in you're in college. Yeah, no,
I'm every time for your newsletter, every sachem, trails, man, it's
all connected, Tianeman Square, Arab Spring. Yeah. Man. People would
turn on the red lights in here. You can see what we've written on
the balls for real and tie all these things together. Secret stuff. Brad's
just given up miss the best news of the week pretty much the left for
dead mud. That's just Jaden Smith's tweets. Chicago tag got real weird fucking
a that stuff. That stuff is very good. You're right. That turned
into a very depressing conversation, all right. Email from Andy. I used
to work for a developer that won a game Spot award sometime in the early
two thousands. The award is a cutout of a tiny Greg to Savin giving
a thumbs up. It used to face my desk and make me laugh every
day. Where any of you around when this incredible award was conceived? Why
and how did it end up a goofy Cassavan cut out. We thought it
would be fucking hilarious. There's one of me and there's one of the Greg
you're right, those things are uh yeah, no, we I forget whose
idea we had to We had to come up with new awards, like Game
Center had bowling pins, and I always thought those were neat, but I
think those were for Game of the Year awards. Those weren't. This was
editor's choice. So anything that got a nine or above was one of these
kind of need to be able to make a lot of these. Couldn't it
couldn't be too They made a lot of them, yeah, I know.
And then Greg left and then I was gone. Not long after, they
were still proudly displayed at a lot of game studios. When I was up
at Bungee for Destiny stuff, there's a Greg in there. I think I'm
in the two K lobby, at least I was last time I was there
one Nevada. Yeah, like these are the loose site blocks that you see
in the last cases. Totally. Yeah, And we just didn't And it's
us holding out a game box so that you know, whoever in marketing sent
these things out would then go get a cut out of the game box,
put it in there with the cut out of us or whatever, and send
it off and they would get a little plaque at the bottom of it that
the name of the game, and I just thought, like, you know,
I forget how I talked Greg into this, or maybe marketing took it
over at some point, but I feel like I was probably involved in the
conception of that dumb fucking idea. Yeah, I don't know. I just
it was one of those things where just like, you know, the personalities
of the site should matter at some point, right, like, let's let's
focus on that a little bit. But yes, then they made them of
Greg and he went to EA, and then I was obviously on my way
less than a year after he left. So give you with cargo shorts,
yeah, wearing a black T shirt. I still have that exact T shirt.
The T shirt was just a black shirt, and they had a sticker
that had the Editor's Choice logo on it that they stucked. My shirts photos
nice, all hundred percent reel, Yeah, exactly, all all terrific.
And then they made our they photo shopped our hands bigger because they wanted it
to, you know, look like it's wolding this game box out there,
It's fucking coming at you. It's scary. Shit. I still have one
of those. I have one of each of them. I have a Greg
and me and then what box art did you put on them? A roommate
of mine, Uh, put printed out a pornography video and put it and
just taped it to the front of it, a funny pornography video. Uh,
they're all funny. Okay, it's not like a sign. No,
this was pre the parody boom. So all right, so now you know,
I guess, I don't know. That's that was my favorite dumb statue
for a long time. Like when you see those, you're like, man,
some somem think I asked the wrong person how we should do these statues.
They asked me a lot of wrong questions. For a good period of
time there, the marketing came to me a fair amount, and there was
a while there that I was like, man, it's really fun to come
up with awful ideas. Maybe I should consider a career in marketing. And
I guess a lot of people for a living. And then I was like,
no, no, that's that's all right. Let's do a few more
of these emails. Mikey from West Australia wrote in and said, what the
hell is a comforter? Is it a duno without a sheet around it.
Do you know the d O O n A. A comforter is like a
duvet with that that doesn't need a duvet cover. So you watch the whole
thing comforter, goddamn blanket. You don't wash comforters if you've made mistakes.
Yeah, that's true because because they're so thick that they're hard to try lumps
stuffing. Use a top sheet. Yeah, to use a top sheet and
to get a get a duvet that has a cover on it. Then you
just watched the cover. What's the duvet again? It's just get's like a
comforter, but you put it in a little got a big down thing.
I'm gonna go and tell you the duvet with no top sheet, that's some
life changing shit. We had. We we had canvas, I don't know.
We had an add on still entitled. They sent me some sheets,
fancy sheets, fucking good stuff. We are we are not a no top
sheet household. Yeah, now after a lot of years of me not being
that way, are you in? I'm in? Yeah? Also not tucked
in at all? You know it's just loose. Yeah, yeah, you
don't want to would be able to stick your leg out or something. I
used to live a very tight in bed lifestyle of tucked in as possible,
like short sheeting my own bed. You want to feel that comfort. Sometimes
if the sheets are so tight that your feet can't stick straight up without your
toes like pressed down, that's fucked pressive sleep. Nobody wants that, like
a cryo chamber. I used to think I wanted that, but then I
evolved. I like the queen size bed with the king size duvet because then
you get like you no matter how who steals the covers, there's still plenty
of covers, and if you want to, you can totally kcoon up so
you can like lay with the on either side, so you so you like
it's cold. That makes sense. Yeah, As as I said before we
started recording, we are California King households, so we don't have no choices
for bigger duvets. But that sounds great. California King is about the same
size, right, but it's like longer but nothin wid Yeah, which by
a little bit, which means that there are some nights where I wake up
with my feet hanging off the bottom of that thing. See if I if
I had a California King in my bedroom. It would touch two walls and
not the corner. M hm right, yeah. Uh. James, also
from Australia, Brisbane in particular, says when music VR, are you off
the grid or on the grid? In the grid? You are that?
You are there? Yeah? Yeah, you're Jack, You're Jack, You're
punched deck man, you've burning grid there? Yeah, you're in the computer.
Yeah, cyberspace. It's maybe you've heard of it, most native interface
between your brain and the computer, and we all use it to play varying
degrees of pong rip off. Pretty good. There's one that is just literally
a ping pong table that I want to try. I've not tried it yet,
but yeah, it's okay, all right, Henry and Minneapolis, this
is a pretty good one. The moment you mentioned Pizza Expo, my ears
perked up. When I was a kid, my dad was a salesman at
a trade show design firm, and one of his big clients was the Wisconsin
Milk Marketing Board, which every year had a booth at the Pizza Expo in
Las Vegas. One year from my birthday, he decided to bring me along
with him and or where I got to experience the joy and miracle that is
the Pizza Expo. The year that I went there, there were literally cement
trucks filled with pizza sauce and dump trucks filled with cheese. What people were
making insane pizzas that would be impossible to make its stores. Just to show
off their product. The booth we were there to set up had made a
pizza that was constructed completely of cheese crust made from baked crunchy cheese, cheesey
Alfredo sauce, et cetera, et cetera. If you ever get the opportunity,
I highly recommend stopping to experience the heaven on Earth that is the International
Pizza Expositions. Like my dream, it sounds incredible, it sounds I think
it's in March. Yeah, we do something like that. Gotta find an
end I had. Look, all you have to do is call and tell
them you're gonna send video cameras and they'll let you Hello, We're from CB.
Yeah. Yeah, that's how that phone starts. Yeah exactly. I
wasn't. I wasn't all that intrigued until the novelty pizza stuff came into the
picture and then I'm like, oh, go see some experimental pizza development,
having gone to several coffee trade shows where the people who are the best in
the world that make the thing that they do will be there showing off for
their peers and competitors. Like, you want to go to a pizza trade
show, fucky three, Just cancel that show and do full total wall to
wall coverage. Let's cover it exactly like we cover E three. Let's do
four hours of Yeah, all right, yeah you can get you get the
Papa John to come by. No. Right before I went and did the
Mario and Sonic quick look at John Bobby East. I went to go get
some pizza and I thought I was just gonna get a moderate quick lunch.
And I was like, okay, I'll take a slice this, and you
know, a nice size slice. And then as sides, they had this
big bowl of like garlic knots things, and I'm like, oh, I'll
take one of those. And then they advertise cal zones. And I never
had a cal zone before. Yeah, It's like, oh, I'll take
a cal zone too. Not knowing a cal it was like a pizza in
half. And also they give you five of these garlic knots, so I
had like eight pounds of pizza for like three dollars or something. Great.
That sounds great. It was, It was pretty great. Cal Zones are
real good. Yeah they are. They're awesome. It's like a pizza folded
in a half. It's really good. It's a lot. It's like a
zone. But like if a person made it instead of a robot. What's
a zone. It's pizza huts cal zoni ish like, do have products.
It's a trademarked calzon. If you have, definitely you are you will be
in some kind of zone. By the time you're done with a pizza.
I'm zoned out, all right. Sounds are pretty good. I like pizza
hut, Yes, I like. I like a pizza hut, deep dish,
supreme, thank you. There's no there's no pizza hut in my town
anymore. So many people. That's where they that's where they built. That's
where they built the little Caesars. That's a that's a ship. Trade heads
great. Given him five bucks and walking out with a pizza immediately has a
certain appeal. Yeah, sometimes you just need an emergency pizza. Yeahpa Murphy's
around here. Yeah, I'm not a taken, big guy. I'm not
even there's too much work involved. Yea, if I'm gonna pays time,
takes a long time to preheat, and fuck that. Man, If I'm
getting a pizza, I don't. I'm not. If I wanted to make
food, I would make food. Yeah, I wouldn't be entertaining the idea
of ordering a pizza to begin with. Did you just say it's three dollars?
They're really chea, they're taking bikes. You're not good. Look what
you They're fine? But like Papa Murfy exists so that your wife calls you
on the way home from work, You'll you'll find out about this soon and
she's like, hey, can you stop at Papa Murphy's and get some slop
for the kids, and I'll turn on the ovens. It's ready when you
get here, and you hit the door and you put that thing in because
it's gonna explode if you leave it uncooked for too long. That's so like
thirty minutes you have to wait or and a ready dude, Like even a
frozen pizza takes like minutes. It's not frozen, it's fresh, That's what
I'm saying. Like a fresh pizza is gonna take less than next minutes,
eight minutes. Maybe you're and you got this nothing, they're not frozen.
I guess, yeah, I don't know. You should we ever decide I
had to have kids, I don't know that slop would be. You don't
know, I don't know. Eventually, okay, it's only a matter of
telling me that I'll eventually break it down and then we'll just all be eating
garbage again. Road Yeah, yeah, okay, yeah, I guarantee he
stops and get some bucket of fried chicken every once in a while now.
And it's not recreational fried chicken. It's survival fried chicken. Yeah. No,
I don't I don't know. It's it's good. Having kids is great.
I encourage everyone to do that. Let's get on that right now,
I really mean it. All right, let's get out of here. Then,
Uh, let's do a couple of emails first before we go. Christian
writes in with an email entitled God of War scientology. The angry Yeah,
the angry red and white smudge that is Crados has slaughtered many a deity.
But what would a god of war games set in a modern religion be?
Like? I would love to see Lord Zenu get his head ripped off Ron
l Ron. Hubbard on a boat is like the second to last boss,
and then Zeno and a volcano. Yeah, you're throwing in this just blood
born, you're throwing or Dante's Inferno. Don't have nothing modern about that.
I think the space should be intentionally left blank, you know. I think
it's thrown Hubbard into the volcano on the front of Dianetics, right, Tom,
cruise Hubbard and you fucking pilot the boat and then there's a whole like
youccumulated you have to take. Yeah, yeah, right, this is just
going through killing all the old gods. It's just a Battlefield Earth game,
right, okay, right, take for Whittaker. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The character's name is tarl. I recommend watching that movie. Have you
seen it? Like, I've not seen it. It is Wow, I
have not seen it. It's amazing. I've not seen it in it's in
its entirety. You've seen that scene that's just Travolta speaking gibberish for like twelve
minutes back and forth. Yeah, that's all that's you got the whole thing,
Okay, it's just more of that. I just bought Batman and Robin
on Blu Ray, and I'm really excited about watching stuff terrible. I've not
seen that and good fifteen years or so. I'm pretty sure it's going to
seem even stupid. Or is that the one with the nipples? Oh?
Yeah, yeah, that movie's real bad and the bad American Express Card or
whatever. Even Clooney doesn't like that movie. Yeah, the ice skate Brother.
Will you help me? Yeah? Will Smith, the shoemaker. Did
you do your civic duty as a Will Smith and go see the New Independence
Day? I have not seen he the only one that thought that's the man
we need. He apparently turned it down. Well he was it conflicted with
suicide squad? Oh is the official word? Okay? Jaden Smith makes a
cameo. Really what Independence Day? Independence? Yeah? Oh wow? Perfect?
Ye. That tells you everything you need to know about whether you should
go see it. You need to go see it because I imagine with a
Twitter handle like at Will Smith, you probably know everything there is to know
about it. I'm gonna go ahead and tell you I have gotten so little
Twitter business about this movie. I like a mute filter. Wow. Well,
like like just to be clear when they were shooting men in black three
in New York and he had that three story trailer. I heard about that
ship every fucking day for a year. Yeah, nothing radio silence on Independence
Day. Wow. Well, I mean he's not in it, so maybe
maybe that maybe that's the only thing I get. Yeah, I'm sure you've
discussed this at some point, but at any point has has his people tried
to contact you for that handle. So my friend Gary wrote a movie for
Will Smith a few years ago. Oh right, and I was at Comic
Con for work when they were doing the after Earth panel. So I met
his Overbrook partners, his brother in law who's who's the producer on the film.
And when I introduced myself, he started laughing so hard that he literally
fell on the ground the first time. That's literally on the ground of the
Omni Hotel in San Diego. As we're getting ready to walk over to the
convention center to do this panel. There is a man who shakes my hand.
I introduced myself as Will Smith. There's a brief explanatory period, and
then he is laughing so uncontrollably that he's rolling around on the Oh that's great
because he was probably already where the Twitter account and that somebody else had it
he maybe was aware of the Twitter account, like Gary introduced me as my
friend Will Smith, yeah, or my other my friend other Will Smith or
something, and and he was just uncontrollably. Yeah, we never got to
negotiations about the value of the Twitter account, and no one's asked you for
that account. I'm at this point, I'm pretty you know what you're asking
price b I'm not gonna put that information on the kidding. Yeah, does
he does? He still not have one. He does not have a Twitter
account. They're they finally cut down on the w one LLL's and all the
people that use the ambiguity of the letter L and the Yeah, so that's
that's all solved. But now there's just the parody accounts that are ship bags.
I mean, he would be at Big Willie Style, that's anyway.
Yeah, or the freshest Yeah, the freshest bridge. I don't know.
He was out there talking a whole bunch of shit about Wild wild West recently.
Really finally yeah, no, he enough time has passed. Yeah,
he very much came out and said like, yeah, that's the thing I
did because I wanted to be the biggest movie star in the world. I
thought, because I thought it was a good movie. Yeah. He like
he had a thing a couple of weeks ago where he was like, look,
I don't I don't want to. I just want to make movies that
are good, not proud of. Yeah, yeah that seems sensible. Yeah.
It was actually like a I was gonna say, is this in the
wake of like post Suicide Squad, I'm only gonna make good movies or is
he actually trying to say that Suicide Squad is this is in the that movie
looks so interesting. Maybe people seem bullish on maybe thing. Look, if
there's gonna be a DC movie this year, that's not dogs, Okay that
one? Yeah? That out? Yes? Is that out this year?
It's this Yeah, soon, it's like July. Okay, it's this month.
Then all right, we're almost there. It's a good thing. We
talked briefly about Transformers earlier. Now we're primed for a female from Taylor Good.
Scrapper is the leader of the Constructor cons but when they combined into Devastator,
he's the right leg at Jeff help. Yeah, And that was before
they really figured out what they wanted to do with their their combiners. Before
the gestalts really were codified. Yeah, the leader always goes to cons was
like one of the first. It was the first, and it was like
it was a six piece. Yeah, it didn't follow the five character format.
Yeah, the five character format helped them determine a leader very easily because
the fucking Torso was the bigger robot than the rest of them. Whoever was
the torso in the head was the leader of the who was it in?
The predicons don't just deeper knowledge than Yeah, I don't know that. I
can't remember the name of any of them. I always had one of each
of those sets. It was just the saddest way that we kind of fit
them together in a weird way. Fucking ridiculous predic king, I don't.
I don't know predic predic king the lion, either the tiger or the puma
because they were all like cats or something. Yeah, I can't I can't
even remember. It was orange. There was one that was made out of
like kind of emergency vehicles like protect the bots. That was an autobot,
right y, Yeah, yeah, I believe it's all I got. There's
the aerial botskay, Yeah, I think uh. The Dinobots was a missed
opportunity. Well that was pre well with the constructions. You know, they
would often fight with Omega Supreme, which was just a single thing. No,
metro Plex was the City a Mex spreame was the tank that turned into
the dude with the tank tracks on his BA. Yeah, like wings,
and then there was then there was Fortress Maximus, which was actually like two
foot tall. That was like posts, I was crazy. Post Metroplex,
they're like fuck it. Metroplex was the one that showed up in the end
of that last not the cartoon Transformers game, but the last Cybertron game.
Right, Yeah, maybe because that was pretty good. Yeah, I have
tripped to con the big the big Decepticon dinosaur and yeah, big robot Tyrannosaurus.
Yeah, that's pretty good. I remember that thing. That's pretty good.
It had battery power so it would walk. Wow, really did it
actually do it? Or did it just kind of eat shit all the time.
I just kind of go. I mean, if you were on a
flat surface, it was a okay, okay. Anything other than that could
carpet, Yeah, carpet, okay, it would be generally okay on carpet,
pretty good. Ipile carpet might trip it up. But I had the
big metal airframe. What was it what was his name, the white jet
oh sky Fire or fire one or the other. Yeah, yeah, he's
Yeah, that thing was cool, but that thing wasn't originally Yeah, I
was going to transfer. That thing was like lifted from the Yeah, it
felt like it one of the macross for robots because a lot of the original
transformers were not part of a cohesive line in Japan. Really, it was
all like, uh shit, I can't even remember the name of it now.
But so it's like Vultron where the cartoons like Vultron, where they just
took footage from a bunch of other cartoons, And I think I think jet
Fire was kind of the one exception of like something that came from something else.
Eventually it all kind of codified that thing. That thing had a really
aerodynamic look of like anime robots, not the angles of most transformers. So
like that thing ended up not showing up in a lot of other stuff because
of a licensing stuff. I think. Wow, I think. And then
gobots where all types of fucking crazy gobots. Man, Yeah, what was
like what was its optimist Prime's original name as a convoy, right, he
was an eighteen wheeler. Yeah, I have dark Convoy, which I bought
when we were I didn't even know existed, and then we were over there
for TGS or something. It was just like fucking black truck with a fucking
anchor. I'm like, that's fucking gray black convoy. I eagerly await your
mixtape. Two more emails and we will actually get out of here. This
one comes in from Riley. On the E three Live Show, Jeff talked
about how he walked around while brushing his teeth and how falling forward with a
toothbrush in his mouth was a real concern of his I have a relevant story.
My wife's uncle went into his bathroom after his daughter had finished showering.
I guess she had left a puddle of water on the floor because when he
stepped in, he slipped forward and fell I first onto a wooden plunger handle.
He walked back into the lettering room, where his wife was sitting,
hand covering his damaged eye socket. They rushed to the nearest hospital, but
there was nothing the doctors could do. His eyeball was squashed. He now
has a glass eye. Fuck. Why would you tell us this story?
This is horrible. I don't write the emails. Give him mort paint or
something that's gonna hurt so bad, probably wouldn't hurt that much after it's actually
popped. The weirdest thing is that the end of the email says, I
have a bunch more eye stories from various members. If you want some more,
I look, I'm not here every week, but I think it would
be a great idea if you guys have a regular body horror, send in
your eyeball questions and not send any Send him to at Will Smith on Twitter.
It's easy to filter that. It's no problem spell all the words to
get around as filters. Fuck are you verified? Fuck no? Right,
then you don't have the quality filter, so you'll see everything you send him.
Why am I not verified? Dude? Can I get a job here
for like a week so you guys on a check market? I could not.
I could not believe a couple of months ago when the rest of us
finally got verified, that they fucking lock up filtering options behind the verified on
Twitter. Dude. It's insane as a service, a service where the primary
complaint is like, you can't block a bunch of the bullshit on the service,
and they and they lock that functionality and the verific like behind a bunch
of business ship was verified for a while, and the ship like the filtering
options make Twitter really really good, right, let you get rid of the
snaggs and all the problems that you have with Twitter and more to the point,
they make it feel like they are literally ushering you into like an exclusive
club. When you like the first time you launch the apps kind of stuff
you get you get this big splash screen where it's like your Twitter experience is
about to get a lot better, and it's like, fucking where has this
been for the last six years? Yeah. It will occasionally like I will
now miss stuff like depending on the app I use, because some apps don't
like honor the like quality filter thing. I think it's is just the mobile
app and maybe the website. Ye, like a lot of the other external
clients and stuff. You'll see a lot of stuff. So occasional I'll look
at that and go like, oh man, that's actually something I would have
liked to have seen. It's fucked up. Can you turn that stuff off?
Yeah? This is you can, but it's it's all or nothing,
okay, you know, so you can see it all or you can see
there's not like a slider. You can say I want to see on my
phone when I'm frequently like looking at it, when I'm not at work and
not interested in hearing about work, it makes sense to have that thing turned
on. Got it all? Right? Final email? Sure? From a
meal? So would you rather would you rather be able to teleport or shape
shift? Wait? Can you shape shift and and look like other people shape
shifting? Like look like John Drake? Embarrassing ships could shape shift? Yeah,
you don't even have to look like person? Yeah, oh okay,
it's like you could be a tiger. Are the rules like two one thousand
things where it has to be like you know, I read the entirety of
the email. Okay, I mean if it's just anything, then obviously I
think Harry Potter rules apply. Right. You could be a cat. You
could be a door knob. Oh, but it only lasts for like a
few minutes, and Harry Potter, that's that's no good, no, no.
If you have to worry about time or shape shifting, there's oh,
I guess you're right. And there's the drink stuff. Yeah, I was
thinking about the poly juice potion. Yeah, I would probably go teleport.
Why yeah, because it's a long drive home every night, and sometimes I
want to go to other countries. What if you want to go to another
country? You could shape shift into a thing? Could I shape shift into
a fucking fast moving jet? That would work for am? I stuck on
the door? It is t two rules, no complex machinery or anything with
Can a ship into like a basketball and then have someone like ship it to
China like express? You know, the best shipping would be really boring.
Fucking that's still a lot of time that sweat their basketball. It's not bothering.
You don't have a brain. You would still have a brain, because
how would I shape shift out that I would fucking basketball? That'd be terrible,
like a background process though you can come out of sleep mod when everyone
no, no, I would probably. I think teleport would be far more
useful. Could rob banks? Yeah, things that like, But you could
shape shift into the boss of the bank. You still have to get you
still have to get the money out of there. You still if you're the
boss of the bank, you can walk around with big dollar sign bags and
no one's gonna ask you questions. MP has so many more like prank uses.
You could do so much shit with shape shifting. Most of mine would
be John Drake, but it would be great for a lot of purposes.
You're just you're telling me that you want to be John Drake, which I
think, oh I would a I agree, Yeah, but also that's really
haunting. Or let's say like there's some celebrity or something that's supposed to be
on the Tonight Show or something, shape shift into him, get there before
the real celebrity and go on, just do some super weird thing, like
some old Crispin Glover deal, and they'd be all over the news. Okay,
if you were going to be a shape shifter, the actual right thing
to do would be to start your own TMZ competitor and then take a bunch
of fucking candid photos stuff of all of these people and get all these hot
exclusives of you know, like, hey, here's some details, and I'm
totally this guy that's really dark. That's that's like Biptanon using the time machine
to do gambling stuff. I'm Paul Giamatti here to tell you I love Heroin.
And then like Paul Giamatti admits to Heroin dead no thinking, Paul prevenza.
Uh and you know, just you kind of get those or yes,
or you shape shift into people that are de ceased and then cause hijenks.
Wow. That's before he passed away. He recorded this message for us.
It's tupac vote Trump. Weird. Weird. I hear might bequeath all of
my living possessions to Dan Record of San Francisco, California. Yeah, yeah,
thanks. I told you to teleport, man, I mean, yeah,
that'd be sweet. Yeah. Why wouldn't you want to teleport? Like,
look, there's three stairs to get up into the restaurant. Look,
I don't have to climb up that shot. I'm just gonna teleport right to
the top of those stairs. You get out of shape, real, QUI
though, you just look Look, I guess if you can teleport. Yeah,
if you can teleport, why do you need to be in shape?
Could do whatever you want. And it's a good point. Yeah. And
I wouldn't teleport everywhere. I would teleport long distances or convene. Well,
no, that's not true. Once you once you could do it, you'd
be like, well, I have to go to the bathroom blank, and
then I'm here, I am in the bathroom if you could teleport, would
they have to draft new rules for like every majors, Like, as soon
as one person on the planet can teleport, does the NFL and the NBA
and I have to like make new rules. You gotta keep that sht on
the day I don't tell no. Yeah, if you, if you,
if you like teleport, as soon as there's a closed room murder mystery,
then who's knocking on your door? The five oh? I would love to
actually like instead of teleport, like the ability to move at flash like speeds
that are indistinguishable from teleporting, you know, so that you actually had to
cover that ground yourself a little bit. That would be helpful because then you
would be moving so fast that you could rob a bank without being seen.
I don't know, if I see the count you still cameras would be pretty
good. You can still trip right to not just be a blur if I
mean, if you trip, you get your up in faster than you Well,
let's toss this in there. What about the freeze time ability? That's
great grand robbing banks? Yeah, no, the's not on the table.
Awful things you could do if you could stop time in terms of just implanting
memories and people's brains. I would wait till there's a big important business meeting
at Sony, and then I would go take John Drake's finger and put it
in his nose and unfreeze time. Okay, just do that over and over
again. Stop stop there, like undress him and put him in the middle
of the conference or something. You guys want to be John, Then get
John Drake naked, all right, go on, switch Drake in boys' clothes.
That would be funny. That would be funny. Yeah, yeah,
here you go here you like, suspend, suspend the can of paint upside
down over his head and then unfree time. Like come on, man o,
man, I think creatively. If you have teleport, you could be
it's like ultimate weapon too, because you're just like I'm going to teleport my
hand into your chest and then your chest would explode but kill people. But
if you but I will say, it's almost could you telefrag people? That
actually? Okay? All right, yeah, yeah, askay, you're fine,
all right, it's the telefraggy that has the problem. Not right,
that's a good point. I'm in. I'm double in on teleport because I
could get home fast. That'd be great. Yeah, just move closer.
Do you think you have to do the little jumps you have to do?
Like jump it's SCEs really fucking expensive, man, Yes, you can't rob
enough banks to before it. I think I think shape shifting is so good
that you have to say that you would be able to teleport anywhere in the
world instantly. Yeah, what about to balance it out? Yeah, otherwise
it would be a no brainer. What if do you but can you tell,
like, can you tell that the landing zone is going to be clear?
Could you accidentally telefrag? People say you can it's safely teleport anywhere in
the cold instantly, because I wouldn't want to have innocent by Sanders killed.
Just people who deserve him, right, bad people. There's somebody who's lived
across the countr from their family for well over a decade. I would easily
go with teleport switched to shape shifter. You don't have to tell your family
that you can telephone. I don't know. Oh man, all right,
hey, why why don't you come home work? Well, it's really it's
like six hours of the airplane. It's really expensive here, asshole, what's
wrong with you? Like, I'm busy It's just like I have to eat
a lot of a lot of It takes a lot of I do a lot
of food afterwards, burns a lot of calories. Hummus is all that makes
it work. I'm like, hummus, all right, I'd be a fucking
horrible, fucking like price to pay. Like you can teleport anywhere, but
it's fueled by hummus. Must the best man we're talking about. I like
hummus just makes me real gass good. Thanks, super super useful informations.
No anyway, all right, that's it. I can't do any more emails
after that. BombCast and giant bomb dot com. Thanks for being here,
Will Smith, thank you for having me. This was fun. Yeah,
that's life these days. You should check out the Food Show if you have
a VR headset. We updated a couple of weeks ago, and the Jankie
arm animation is significantly better now, so we use I don't know why you
would actually want to fix any of that machine. I mean I do know
why, but we trained algorithms to learn how human bodies actually move, and
now we can strain based on that, and they look pretty good. I
really enjoyed the charm of the look insane body movements in that thing. If
you take the headset off, you still melt into the floor. Okay,
all right, so we got that. As long as that's in, there's
still lots of room for jank in there. Great, Like when we do
in the future, we were going to do things that will break it in
new exciting ways. So yeah, there's always the chance that's going to fly
off the rails next one. Great, great, but more stuff coming in
the not too two distant future. Yeah, cool, cool, as far
as this place goes. Jason's out all week, right, yep, but
Drew's back tomorrow. We'll be back tomorrow so we can at least try to
cobble some form of production stuff together. What are you guys doing? Those
guys are gone, Just kind of sit around and we'll answer emails all day
day. It's podcast for me, but for it's back tomorrow, so okay,
let's never let this happen again. All right. I learned how to
use most of the gear, but not that's true. Moved, that's true,
Jeff. Jeff did handled a good bit of that last year during the
production apocalypse or whatever. Yea, all right, thanks for being here.
I thank you as we said, Uh, We're gonna get the heck out
of here. We'll be back next week with a regularly scheduled edition of the Giant Bodcast