If we had had a second child. We only have one Landry, we'd
had a second one, and I gave you naming rights for it being a
boy or a girl, What names would you choose? Okay? So you're
telling me that if I suggest a name, you would agree no matter what
it is. Well, is all hypothetical, friend. We ain't having another
baby. We've had all of our parts fixed. They are retired. They're
not having another baby. So yes, I freely give you control over naming
our non existent baby. If it was a boy, there's one name that
would I'm going with it was a boy or a girl. Okay, so
I would go with If a boy, it would be Magnus. Magnus mclerey.
You haven't that kid is going to the World's Strongest Man competition. If
we had a Magnus mcklerey, he's in there. He's throwing those kegs up
in the air, bending the bar over his head, throwing the telephone pole,
flipping the pole. Oh yeah, he'd be in the Highland Games in
Scotland. Look those suckers up. I think I think our daughter might be
the first woman to ever compete in that Magnus. Then I would go with
Padrag, which I like a whole lot of very Irish name, Padrig mclerey.
I like that a lot. And then the last one is this one
would be for a boy or a girl, Mickey Mickey mclerey. So I
think I'm gonna go with Mickey for both boy and girl. Micky Mackley,
Mickey macray. That kid's playing center field for the New York Yankees. And
no, couldn't no doubt, all right. So earlier we were talking,
we were kind of wondering what's going to rise up and kill us, first
animals or computers, because there's been a rash of animal attacks, including a
monkey in Oklahoma that killed or didn't kill, it injured a woman. I
almost ripped her ear off. Before that was a was a zebra that nearly
mauled the guy's arm off. And while we were doing that, I asked
Trisha if she had ever heard this song that my dad used to sing,
and she had never heard of it. It was, Hey, there,
daddy, do you see there's a horse and striped pajamas. No, that's
not what it is at all. That's a animal people call a zebra.
So she had never heard that before. And I have asked a bunch of
I've done it like two or three times with other people. They had never
heard it either. Well, since I mentioned that, our listeners have informed
me about the song, they know what it is and they all remember it
from Captain Kangaroo No Way with the Fuzz when she was little. Apparently that
song is a core memory for your dad somehow, I remember. I feel
like we were on the tail end of Captain Kangaroo when we were kids.
Well, I was older than you, so I was in his prime,
right, I'm older. Is she the one you went to one of his
show recordings? No, mister Rogers. Oh you're so lucky you went to
I know. I saw mister Rogers in person at the University of Arizona and
Tucson had his sweater, trichet came out and he did his whole thing,
and he put on his shoes. Yeah, and it was I think mister
Rogers could make all children be quiet? Right? Was it silent in there
the whole time? And everybody instantly was a good little boy or girl?
Yeah they were because that was mister Rogers, who's the man. My whole
thing was, why are you teaching kids be tattletales, right right? Why
right? You don't want to teach your kid to be tattler. So I
have a bunch of my girls are teachers. So I sent out a text
in our group text and I said, ladies who are teachers, We did
a story about a second grade teacher who put out tattle forms for her kids
to tattle on their classmates. Why would she do that? Why promote tattling?
I said, for her own amusement. One kid was mad because the
other kids scented markers were too smelly. So my friend Wird, who is
a current elementary school teacher, she wrote back, probably to get them to
write it. She said, I know some teachers think it cuts down on
tattling. Surely those teachers they know they know something we don't as to why
this is happening. That makes sense. We should put a tattle tub in
our house for one week and we tell and we read the tattles on the
show. But everybody, we know what everybody's handwriting is. Maybe you have
to type it and print it. Yeah, you got to type it and
print it out and put it in the tattle tub and then we'll we'll share
them with everybody. Oh, Landry'll be all over this. It'll be like
her second job. She'll punch in and she won't stop writing. And I
won't tell her anything for a week. What do you mean you won't tell
her anything? Oh, you won't share anything? Yeah, because you know
you have those conversations with hers, like, hey, don't tell your mother
that, okay? Oh yeah, she just that's why she tells me.
I'm sure that I tell her. Yeah, plant, I know when they're
plants to. By the way, Oh, you think you know everything?
You like a book? Right, we're going to use the throw up ball
for our tattle tub. But that's perfect. Get another use for that bull,
Josha. I'm gonna share with you. Well one of the many benefits
of you being married to me. Great ah, thank goodness, thanks Sandy.
Well, it's something that used to be taboo that has now been normalized,
and this sucks for the new generation of young people. This sucks.
It used to be taboo, which is what made it fun to do.
And now it's normal. Oh yep, Office Houchin is now is now acceptable.
It's gen Z and the millennials. It's totally okay with them. There's
it's fine. It's not like the good old days when you had a little,
you know, side piece at work, you know that little Yeah,
I'm not saying cheating on a spouse or something like that. We're gonna talking
about. Oh, it's just an office. That's something you had to keep
quiet. Yeah, I didn't want everyone knowing. You had to sneak around
a little bit. You had to, you know, leave for lunch.
I'll leave ten minutes early than you leave, and then will rendezvous. It's
your place, right, Yeah, exactly, man, Sandy, I was
real good at office hoochin back in the day. I loved it. I
remember a boss of mine, his name is Lan Basin, great guy,
great guy, and this I was single and everything. And I walked out
of me and I was walking down the hall. He came up, put
his hand on my shoulder and started walking with me. And he's a kind
of young guy too, and he goes, I just want you to know,
it's probably not a good idea to be messing around with two girls in
the office. In the same office. Yeah, in the same office.
I was double office hoochin. By the way, nobody has put more time,
effort and spend more money on making sure period of her day is a
good is a good part of her dad? Right? Then talk about my
bed and stuff. Yes, yes, that's exactly what I'm talking about.
Your covers and your egg crates, and your pillow toppers and your starts.
To get a good mattress, then you got to have a good pillow topper.
Then you have to have soft sheets. You have to have the exact
right pillows, which that's hard to get that combination right. It took a
while for me to get that. How to get a special pillow to achieve
that. Then you got to have a blanket, not too heavy, not
too light, because then you had a weighted blanket, so that's what's on
your bed. Then you have to have the proper fan, the one that
blows hard enough and makes the right amount of noise. It's a whole I
should write a book on it, Sandy, I think that I could help
a lot of people. A chink in the armor. We may have found
another one for Tricia, something that softens her cold, dark black heart.
Now forever we've knowed about little children and trash men, and when two different
types of animals become friends, like a duck and a bear, which until
you. I didn't know there were videos of that, but apparently the Dodo
has plenty of them. Correct. Oh yeah, the chicken and the elephant.
Uh uh, I can't. I don't know why. Well, we
may have found another one. I think pea paw grandpas have always kind of
been in there, right, Oh, pea paws with Johnty hats. They
get me too. But NA like this one. Not like this one,
Sandy. This one caught me off guard. It is about a little boy.
He's nine. He lives in South Dakota. He was the star of
his baseball game. He got two home runs and a grand slam. He
rushes home and this is the audio of him telling his grandpa about it.
You know, I got t long runs and then my grand slam. I
signed the ball for you, and it says, Papa, I love you.
You sought me every sing a belface. Oh, I just can't.
Grandpa immediately starts crying, and then the little boy is crying and they hug
each other. Oh, his grandpa taught him everything about baseball. I can't.
It makes me cry every single time. Trisha. Let's go back in
time to a safer America, back when kids used to run the streets and
would stay outside all day long until the street lights came on, and that
meant it was time to go home. But you always ignored it. And
the ice cream truck used to cruise through the neighborhood. God, I love
the ice cream truck. I can't remember the last time I saw an ice
cream truck go through a neighborhood. I don't think they do anymore. I
think they've gotten such a bad rap being bad people driving the inside that you
know, like like they're going to kidnap your kid. Why do they know
that? I mean, I think that people are just, you know,
don't go up to an ice cream truck. I don't know, you know
whatever, I don't know. You just don't don't see him anymore. But
they used to roll through my neighborhood all the time. And in just a
minute, we're gonna tell you what the top ten favorite ice cream truck orders
are. But I have to tell you a funny story about the ice cream
truck in my neighborhood. So h it would come through, and somehow I
became friends with the guy that drove it, and I used to rise,
I used to ride around. I got in the van and used to ride
around with him. Yeah, and he'd sell the ice cream. I did
it for about three or four days, and then finally he told me I
couldn't come back anymore. It was, you know, it was not safe,
or it was weird, or people had bad ideas or whatever. But
I remember riding around to that ice cream truck and taking orders and help them
out. Man, they'd lose your mind when that ice cream music came on.
You heard me. Didn't matter what you were doing. Oh, just
like children had special hearing. You could hear it blocks and blocks and blocks
away. You knew that it was coming, and you'd run. I'd run
home, try to get some money, right well, getting trying to get
money out of my dad was like getting blood out of a rock. But
he'd cough up a dollar or thirty five cents. You'd go trucking back as
fast as you can, and I promise you, I swear the ice cream
truck man would see you in his rear view mirror and he'd speed up.
He did not you have weird use on ice cream truck men. Would you
like to know what some of the most popular ice cream truck recorders are?
Yes, please. Oh, you've got to tell the great trick that parents
can pull on their kids. Hang on back, Okay, yes, hold
on, hey, let me do it. Let me do the post populars
and then you do that. Ok. The chocolate drumstick is number ten.
The Oreo ice cream sandwich is number nine. The Neapolitan ice cream sandwich.
That's fancy ice cream sandwich right there. That's number eight. Now I don't
My ice cream truck that I used to ride around on did not have a
soft serve machine inside of it, but apparently some do, and it's number
seven. The Cookies and Cream ice cream bar is six. The Klondike bar.
What I wouldn't do for a Klondike bar. Five? The twist soft
serve. Then get pretty classic here, the vanilla ice cream sandwich. Yeah,
the drumstick number two, and the number one is the crunch ice cream
bar. I think that's a new invention since our childhood because it was Bombop
City when I was growing up. I mean it was bomb Pops. Crunch
Bar was around, but fudge bomb pops. Are you talking about the banana
chocolate layered bomb Pop? Are you talking about the red, white and blue
bomb Pop or both? Either one. Well, I mean the bomb pop
is a category. Yeah, tell everyone the great trick parents can pull on
their kids. Yeah, this, for some reason, to me, has
got to be the most clever parent trick I've ever heard. Parents are known
to fip to their kids when they're littles a little bit to get out of
certain things. And the best one I ever heard was that when the ice
cream truck comes by and the music is playing, that means they're out of
ice cream? Was like, whoever came up with that? Brilliant? Brilliant?
All right, well we're gonna talk about it. I got to admit
it's a little bit weird. But our thirteen year old daughter is in the
baby business. It's so weird. I don't know what it is with our
kid, but she got on some random, weird things that she picks up
and like that, what was that head that she had? Oh, a
mannequin head that she named Deborrah that I banned for the house, and she
snuck it in one time and I told her the next time I see this
in the house, it's going in the trash can. It was weird,
just a mannequin head, And I was like, you're the weird kid at
school with the mannequin head, aren't you? Yep, yep, this a
weird kid. I had to tell her not to and I yeah, I
told her. I said, you remember how your mom and I told told
you one time that our biggest job is to protect you. I'm gonna do
you a favor and protect you. Don't go anywhere with Debra anymoread Yeah,
don't walk around with Debra anymore. It's weird. You're the weird kid with
mannequin head and the FBI over here checking you out before we know it,
right, So, yeah, they're going to say it started when she was
young, she carried manichan of heads around at school. Yeah, she's got
all the signs of a serial killer. Now. The other day she comes
running into my room. Look what I got, Look what I got.
She's got a ziplock full of teeny teeny tiny little plastic babies making plastic babies,
plastic babies. Here's what we ordered them on Amazon, sixty pieces.
They're king Cake babies, like you know the King Cakes in New Orleans.
You can put the baby in there with the strings. Many babies for showers,
baby showers, Tiny plastic babies, to put in ice cubes. I
don't know anything about that party decorations. She has decided that she's going to
make money. Let me back up. She had some and she took them
to school and kids were asking her if they could have one left and right.
So she saw a need. And now she's charging fifty cents per baby.
She ordered fifty. She was telling me twenty five cents a bit.
Yeah, we figured out that she wouldn't make enough money. I'm helping her
on it. I'm her business manager. It's like, baby, you're gonna
have to charge fifty cents if you want to make a profit. She went
to school the other day and within forty five minutes of school starting, she
texted me she'd already made like two bucks. Really, she's sled those babies
out of her backpack. It's so weird. She needs a few baby brokers,
like some other kids out there pushing the babies they get, they charge
I don't know, seventy five cents, they keep a quarter, they give
landry fifty. Yeah, and they're in business, you know what I mean.
Here's what I told her too, I go, do not give the
baby. Don't give them the babies upfront them say I'll bring you fifty cents
tomorrow. Uh uh, you're not doing that because then you're in the collection
business. That's right, and that's a whole different group of kids. You
got to get involved in that part of the business. I know a little
bit about that. Yeah, you're gonna have to talk about that. I
told her, is like money up front, then they get the baby.
You can reserve a baby for them, but you're not going to give them
the baby and have them pay you the next day. We're not doing that.
No, have a great day everyone, and we'll be back tomorrow. Goodbye.