We sure don't. Hey look it, Hey, look he's it. Hey
look it. Hey good for me? Good enough for me. Eh.
There's just something good about soy sauce and rice, so fucking good, but
like you're so good eating like a cartoon. I was trying to be subtle,
but I couldn't help it. That was being subtle as wild. Welcome,
Welcome to start Tank podcast. Everybody. Uh, today we're going to
be talking about all of the crazy things that happened in the news, of
which there's nothing. So we're gonna go into questions and of course tomorrow Biden's
gonna die or something like some crazy fucking thing is gonna happen that we're gonna
miss, of course, because this just happens always. Or what if Biden
wakes up to my al Right, guys, how would you feel if one
day Biden we woke up and Biden gives like an emergency press conference and he's
twenty six. I was thinking the literal same thing that if he shed his
skin to younger Biden. I was thinking the same thing, rips himself apart,
and he's handsome. He's like, oh, thank god, you guys.
Thoughts you guys are stupid. You actually thought it was old and decrepit.
He had a while. You're stupid for not knowing that at any moment,
I could have ripped my shell apart and become young. You didn't know
that, So you want dumb. I just want real reptilians. Man.
I remember me and my friend we went to the scenario of because we saw
Obama. I think it was I don't think it was an inauguration. I
think it was just him being like, yeah, I did it or something.
I don't fucking know. There's a bunch of people there. Oprah was
there crying in the front, and we were saying, like, once he
gives a speech, imagine if he just took off his mask, and it
was just, you know, one of those reptilian things that have like a
long snall, like a crocodile, and just jumps in the crowd and starts
eating fucking Oprah, Like that's the first thing he does. He just starts
eating her. And they were like, he would go for Oprah first.
He would, he would like, if you were the most nourishment beast,
if you were a hungry beast, you would go for Oprah first. I
think old. I just feel like she has the most, you know,
she has all that money she's got, like she probably has a lot of
you know, like there's something about it, like eating a powerful person will
just make you power up. Yeah, it's like how it's like how money.
It's like how Magic Johnson's money staved off his aids. Right, it's
the same thing, except Oprah's money seasons for old me. Wow, she's
seventy, She's exactly seventy. She's up there. Man. I really remember
watching the episode of Oper with my grandma once she turned fifty. Yeah,
twenty years ago episode. I remember watching that too with my with my grandmother.
It's weird. Yeah, I remember watching Yeah, me too. Everybody
watched that. I don't want to be left out. The world stopped.
So Kingston show showed the show the audience, your Cloudlifter. Show the audience,
your Cloudlifter, show the show, show show them what you got.
Oh yeah, so we got We got kingson the Cloudlifter. His audio has
been a little bit soft in comparison to Hours, and we're gonna this is
our way to fix that. Unfortunately, he bought it and he assumed that
it came with an extra XLR cable, which is what you need for these
things, which is a reasonable assumption. It's a reasonable assumption. I made
the same exact. I think the only reason I didn't find myself in a
problem is because I think I had an extra I had an extra what is
it cable from those old mics I used to use the A K A K
A K A C A K G C fourteen's what the fuck are they called?
I guess, I don't know whatever, some other mic the mics I
used to use in my videos, and uh so I was fine, But
yeah, those it's really frustrating how often now you will buy things and they
won't come with the things that they need to function. I don't know when
this started, but it's happened, but it's extra unavoidable now I've noticed because
that happened. You were talking about the iPhone doesn't cut? What do you
mean the start, it was definitely one of the it really maybe it was
like, there's no, there's no way iPhone, it doesn't come with it
doesn't come with the with the adapter. They took out the adapter. They
they'll give you a wire even why right now the brick anymore? Yeah,
and so now and it's actually even and it's more inconvenient because not everybody,
not every outlet and every plug in it has USBC. USBC is you know,
fairly a modern thing. And so if you go to a hotel and
you just want to jack into like say that you know, the strip,
it usually sometimes will have a USB like USBA, but it won't have it
doesn't have USBC, and it's really fucking annoying. They won't give you the
adapter. Do you have to pay? However much more, you know those
outlets that have like the USB instead of just like that's really new to me.
I saw that recently and I was like, those mother these fucking idiots
thought they really thought we were done. They thought we were done. They
thought it was oh it's USB, and hey, it's been USB for so
long, why would it change, let's put it in the outlets. And
then here comes USBC, just kidding, just joking, this is it now?
Yeah you wait a fuck dumbo stumbo, bitch, fucking stupid. I
will I wish I still had my computer that had FireWire in it, dude,
because that was supposed to be the future. That was like all right
before there was a yeah, because there was just US regular USB one right,
that was the first one at USBA, or just USB yeah one point
oh right, that that was it. It was just the USBA one point
oh. And and then FireWire came out, which was like, oh shit
is so fast. This this is the this is the future. And then
like I think it was like a month later, like all right, here's
the USB two point oh. It is better. You're like, oh all
right, then, dude, FireWire. There was anything better than USB.
I feel like USB was so good already. It was fire It was just
like just above it, just a little bit above it. It was a
little bit faster. Frank, data, is USB too much better than USB
three? USB one? I mean, I think the USB one of three
is a major difference. Like say, I didn't well because probably because we,
you know, when you started using things incrementally, just like say,
we didn't really notice all of the leaps and bounds of like the consoles and
ship when things were kind of getting better and better, like we noticed DMI.
I noticed, HMI. That shit blew my mind. That's one thing.
I have terrible eyes. And even I was like, something's different here,
something I didn't really notice because I got a new TV. Look.
He plugged in Halo and I was like, bro, why does Halo look
so good? And I was like freaking out a little. The thing about
the thing about the HDMI is like I didn't notice it because the three sixty,
when the three sixty launched, that was like the start of HD right,
it was the start of HD generations and that was before HDMI. So
what they had was they had the like sick composite cables or whatever. It
was like it was like the yellow red white, but then there was like
blue and green I think, and then like orange, yeah, blue green,
like another and something like that. But there was like a lot and
it looked high death like it looked exactly like what you would know what HGM.
I just did that put in one cable and I was like, oh
cool, So like that wasn't it wasn't like a CMI wasn't like a revolution
to me. But FireEye was crazy, and I know I noticed it specifically
because I had a I had a I had those you know those Lacey hard
drives where like with the with the orange rubber around it, there is like
a silver box with like orange rubber around it, Like they had it a
lot in high school, Like not high school colleges would need. I have
one somewhere here, but they used FireWire, and I was like, I
don't know. They're called Lacey's. Well, let me let me I have
it, let me grab it real quick. They're they're fucking I think I
skipped that. I don't think I ever got one of these. I just
looked it up right now. I've never seen the Lacy brand. I mean,
I guess it's a it's entire brand, but like I'm seeing like the
rubber, the orange and ship around it. I don't know where. This
looks like some yep, like it has like a fucking protection on it,
like if you're gonna drop it from like a two story building, Like what
the fuck is that? Did you look at? Did you look it up?
Yeah? I'm seeing it right now, and it just it looks like
it's padded in a way that makes no sense to me, Like what's gonna
happen to it? Is it? It just looks like it's all right,
you might be running with this and one I don't know it just yeah,
I don't know, I don't I don't really know. It's strange like but
they were required. They were like required, they were they were a required
purchase for our film classes because they were just like, Yeah, these are
the hard drives you're gonna use. You're gonna transfer data with this, You're
gonna move shit from place to place with this. These are important, go
buy these. And everybody had them, so they would get mixed up all
the time because they all looked the fucking same. But you had them in
work and then you get back not yours. Yeah, like awesome, this
has fucking this has a lot of porn on it. We all had I'm
gonna keep it on copying onto my computer obviously, but like we all had.
We all had to. We all had to do it. Like it's
kind of like how this is. It's so funny actually, because this is
what I noticed this once MacBooks started becoming the default laptop, where like everybody
had a MacBook. But because everybody had a MacBook and every MacBook looked the
same, no one, you couldn't really tell your shit apart. So like
a lot of people's a lot of people just had stickers and ship on their
MacBooks just to tell them apart. I did, you know, and I
did the same thing with the fucking hard driver. It's like I just I
put blue tape all over it. Just I was like, mine's the blue
one so I could tell it and you put a penny on it. Then
he put a penny on it, and he was like, dude, I
put my dick on everybody. I'm about to go on every day too.
And it's a bunch of series of like how do you why did we all
choose the same failed stage. The thing that pissed me off about it though,
is that, like I remember, it had a FireWire cable and no,
you know, anything else, and I was just like why the And
I couldn't find a like you couldn't go to best Buy and find a FireWire
cable. They just didn't sell them, and like like Amazon, you'd have
to get them, and it was just like super that was back when like
shipping was so fucking you'd have to pay like fifty dollars for a diship.
It's like, I'm not doing this. What the fuck is this? It's
just so stupid. What is FireWire? This firewar cable on my fucking PC?
Either? What is this? What is this technology? So it was
just I don't know, man, Firewars pissed me off, as I do
know that it's good, but like it made me so mad that I had
to use it. Yeah, I remember going to college right paying for tuition
and then still having to pay for books. That's crazy, that that was,
that's real. Yeah, I saw all that fucking money for tuition and
then you still have to pay for the books. Yeah, it's all about
so fucking you as much as humanly possible, and that's all every I feel
like that's all everything is, even like you made a comment Chris about everybody
was switching to MacBooks, and I always felt like that was one of the
biggest social conspiracies of convincing people that MAX were somehow better or necessary for anything,
where you're just paying infinite, like so much more money. And I
had every program that they had except for its just not in that version.
I didn't understand. But like, I'm paying significantly less for my PC,
I didn't. I everyone that tried to convince me, especially like oh,
if you're an artist, you gotta get this, and I'm like, I
don't why, and nobody had a legitimate reason. I didn't understand why.
I just feel like it was a great marketing, and I think at a
certain point Apple was doing that too with their phones. But now I do
actually feel distinct different to where I just I had the Galaxy twenty three for
like a second, like three days, and their operating system was so annoying
to me that like it actually shocked me that. I was like, I
can't believe the fuck it. You still have to call to like check your
voice messages. I didn't even know. I thought that would have been solved
forever ago. Like you know, an iPhone, you just go to the
tab and then your shit's there, and then it even transcribes it and everything.
You can just look at it real quick. Then I was like,
oh, I have to check my voice messages and like you gotta call you
have this? I was like, what fucking year is this? I have
a Galaxy twenty three right now. It just like that was the only thing.
But they're differences that I'm like, Okay, I will gladly pay extra
for this iPhone because it is just a better product in my opinion, Like
it is just yeah, it's in my in my experience. In my experience,
PCs are better than our PCs are better than Mac desktops. MacBooks are
better than most laptops that I've used, and iPhones are better than most smartphones
that I've used. That's that, that is true. But like on a
PC, what what what about a MacBook? You things better than like a
I don't know, like just like any PC, like any I think they
have I think they have better I mean it's very specific, but I think
I think they have better track pads. I think they just have a better
there's like more responsiveness to it. I think things run a little bit smoother,
like programs tend to run a little bit smoother on it. I don't
know, Like I cause I have a really expensive, like a really good
like gaming laptop, like a like a proper it's like a razor blade or
whatever. It's what what they were called fifteen. It's got like a stupid
like it runs Destiny perfectly fine, which is which is Destiny is a really
weirdly demanding game, especially for a laptop laptop. Yeah, and it runs
it privately fine. So it's like this is this is sick. This is
cool, but it feels like when if you're not doing gaming stuff on it,
it just feels fucking clunky, like writing on it, feels fucking weird.
Like the track pad is like really like not where it needs to be,
Like the clicking feels fucking weird, like just the I don't know,
there's something about it that feels like distinctly worse than even like my twenty eighteen
MacBook that is currently dying, whose speakers are like the speakers on the speakers
on that MacBook. It's getting to the point where, like the bass is
any bass frequency on my laptop right now, on my MacBook sounds like like
a game Boy Like it sounds like a game Boy speaker where it's like,
you know how the Pokemon, you know the Pokemon when when the Pokemon used
to show up on Game Boy Color, And he's like, like they make
those fucking disgusting, fucking noises. That's what like every blow frequency sounds like.
So I can't. I can't. I have to. If I'm watching
it anything on it, I have to. I have to wear headphones.
If I'm listening to music on it, I have to wear headphones. I
don't even do any I don't even do that on my laptop anymore. I
just like I stick I stick to just everything else. But I don't say
speakers on on just notebooks in general. I feel like that's probably one of
the biggest things that just annoyed the fuck out of me, that they're never
They've never been good enough for anyone that I've ever bought, doesn't matter how
how much money or anything I've I'll try to be like at a hole.
I'm like, I'm at a hotel with Jojo however many years ago, and
I like, oh, yeah, let's just watch a movie on my laptop
and it just like you can't you. It's like, yeah, it's fucking
crazy, And I'm like, how how is how how is it? How
are my piny ass speakers? How are the drivers so much better on my
iPhone than my fucking save hundred dollars fucking notebook? Like what the fuck?
Try watching? She started watching a movie on my on my MacBook with the
fucking that the bass freu. It's a it's a great It's funny because like
I've I first noticed it because I was like, you know what this is,
this is look whatever, we'll be transparent here. I was like I
first noticed it and I was like, you know what, I'm gonna I'm
gonna watch it. I'm gonna watch it. I'm gonna watch some porn it,
you know what I mean? And I brought it up and then I
it was so distracting the sound that I was like, I'm not I don't
even want to do this anymore, Like I like, I like, I
gave up, Like I stopped and I just went about my day because it
was it was that disruptive. I really think MacBooks. I think when mac
Books succeeded is they have it has good software for like mixing and editing video
on it already. That is Yeah, I think it really does as an
advantage. But is that like is it? Is it? Sorry? Is
it truly like yeah, garage band is the thing? Yeah? But is
it it should be? I don't know if it's still like how everything is
now? But like, is everything still like because I remember there used to
be a lot more. I used to correct me if I'm wrong. I
used to I thought back in the day with windows like Outlook and all that
stuff was free? Am I wrong in that? And like, say you
you were able to use like, uh, what is the what is the
sorting one? Uh? Damn, I forgot what everything's called. Uh,
I don't know. I don't know when you're trying to keep like tabs and
stuff. You know, the thing you used to like make like graphs and
ship and oh my god, what is it called excel Jesus Christ. Yeah,
it's been a minute. Yeah, all the Microsoft Office. I thought
I thought I had access to that stuff back in the day. But I
have to pay for it and some like three sixty deals or some ship it's
called or something to just have the software period. That's what I wondering.
What about how is it for Apple? Like, can you if you were
to buy a MacBook, do you have access to just Photoshop and Adobe Illustration
Illustrator whatever, because those no, because those are Adobe, so like that
they Adobe has their own partner, Okay, like I think they they might
have partnered a long time. I have that. I have the Adobe Sweet
as well. Yeah. Adobe, Adobe does Photoshop and illustrator and all that
stuff. What you get with garage band, I think is like I think
you get oh my god, it's nope, notepad. You get garage band.
I know it's there. You don't have to pay for garage. I
think there may be like a pro version of garage banth that you could pay
for something, but like, you don't, it doesn't it'd be you'd be
fucking stupid like that. Why would you, yeah, just pay for just
pay for a better fucking but like that's that's the thing. It's like,
what I have noticed is that Photoshop outside of a desktop PC where you can
really where you can really soup the thing up, right, Because Photoshop and
and uh Premiere on my souped up PC run great, although they still are
a little bit fucking wonky in comparison to on my MacBook, which is half
as powerful that you know, there's something something about it. The better I
don't know. Yeah, yeah, I don't know. It's yeah, yeah,
exactly. Yeah, that's what I think, you know what having what
do? Well? No, I was gonna say, I bet it's because
you can't customize Max in the same way. You know, there's only it's
it's kind of like a console versus a PC, where it's like, okay,
a games coming up for PS five, Okay, it's gonna run great,
Like a PS five exclusive is gonna run great because they only have to
worry about PS five, you know what I mean, versus like a game
that comes to everything. It's like, oh, well, this is gonna
be a little bit wonky because we have to configure for millions of PC configurations,
and then you know, this other console and then this other skew of
this other console. It's like, yeah, there's that's probably it. But
I don't know that makes sense or does No, that totally makes sense.
No. I was just saying, like, I know, the the the
only advantage I remember having like Max or something like that was if you were
it was like sharing files of projects. So whether if it was in like
some type of iMovie thing or whatever the fuck you were using, what what
is the major thing that they were using. I can't even remember final cut,
final cut, and then and then and then I think like using pro
tools, people just share files that way, So you wanted to have a
Mac for that instead of like you know, to me, the squirt around
that you just share the actual tediously share like the stems of like a music
project, versus just dropping the file, which is so convenient. So that's
the one thing that the major advantage Google Drive has made it a lot simpler,
and things like that like Dropbox I remember back in the day, but
dude, I will say, air drop is fucking amazing, Like a drop
is so convenice. It's the only thing that I wish. It's the only
thing from the Apple ecosystem that I wish I could put on my PC,
like truly, Like it's so no convenient, it's insane, but uh,
like them, you can transfer instantaneously. Fucking is mind boggle it. It
really doesn't make sense. It's it's borderline magic. Like it doesn't it doesn't
make it feel like it does feel like magic. Everything feels like magic Apple
right now, So let me let me let me a moment. Wild video
tience is like video technology in general, Like that I was watching something randomly
say no dog. It was talking about the guy that made it so we
could like properly send videos and picture someone another. And I'm like, that's
magic. That is mad that this man figured out magic. And you can
tell me, you can explained this stuff to me completely perfectly, but it's
still at the end of the day, feels like magic. It's like when
you when people were talking about, oh, why we're switching to different frequencies,
like say when we're doing digital versus like analog when it came to TV
and stuff in the channels, and like since you can't see anything, since
you can't see the waves, it just feels like fucking magic. That's the
problem. We can't see the ship happening, like if you can see it,
If you can see it, you feel more comfortable, like imagine,
you know, it's just weird where it's like, how is this ship transferring?
I can't fucking see anything sense. The fact that I get press buttons
on my phone and then look at someone's face that's in fucking Japan and talk
to them is wild. I don't care anybody women in real time. See
some women's feet and you know she's just pouring like fucking sour cream on I'm
crazy dude, pouring her toes. And I'm just trying. I'm trying.
I'm trying lately to be very cognizant and very aware of how amazing technology is
around me and like actually not be jaded about it because I was, I
don't know. Something hit me the other day where I was just like watching
YouTube video on my phone. I was like, it's crazy that I can
do this because I remember being bad. I remember being baffled when like portable
DVD players came out and it's like, well, you can watch a DVD
wherever you want. And I remember just like feeling like whoa, And now
it's also trivial. I'm touching in fake buttons on a screen and it's working,
and it's like I should really try to just appreciate like where we are
instead of just being like this fucking rectangle that ruins lives. I fucking hate
this thing, but uh, let's move let's there, it's a light week.
Let's move on to some questions from our from our audience. Right,
I've got I gotta say I've never felt that about technology right before. Oh,
I'll tell you this is exactly I just want to say. Right when
I felt this, I felt this when dual monitors became like easily accessible,
when it's like that was just the common thing, and then putting eight screens
of porn at the same time because you would just window four and four and
that ship was like this is fucking insane, Like it was like it was
it was that the first thing was that the first thing you did. It
was it was it was the first thing I did. But it was the
first thing I thought where I'm like, I can't wait to try this when
I saw because I saw my friend do something. It was he this dude
was an amateur because it was my rich friend Muhammad and he I might have
talked about this before, but he had three monitors and only one of them
was dedicated to porn. I was like, this is crazy. This motherfucker
had like ship up and then playing a game and then porn. I was
like, dude, that's crazy. But then I'm like, this guy's fun.
What a fucking idiot like this? He could be putting windows all over
and then simultaneously running it. Now you know, hopefully it can run it.
Your your internet and your your process is good enough to fucking handle all
that porn at once because you can easily. But I'm not really that much
in the porn like I used to be back in the day, right,
But that was a moment for me. This was probably like two thousand and
eight or something where I was like, this is this is the future.
The future is here, and just hearing like a bunch of chicks moaning at
once. It's it's it's a cacop. It's just just writhing like orgy of
sound, and it's just like this is not even arousing at this point.
This is like this sounds. I want to get it. I want to
danger goon cave. I want to make a Google came Loki, like when
I move, when we literally get our house finally, like there's gonna be
one room that's gonna be like dug into the ground, beeper and off to
the side, So it's gonna be literally like it's gonna be my house,
and then under the dirt to the left it's gonna be another room. That's
my goodcase. It's gonna be like Joe's Joe's eight monitors all over the place
and it's all just porn. They're gonna be porn and somebody like like dropping
marbles down the step like there's a bunch of NOI it's all at once.
Yeah, can you imagine? Guys? I want to ask you a genuine
question. Do you think we're ever going to get to a point where people
watch porn where the top of the video is porn and the bottom is people
playing like subway surfers. Yes, you say, you say, get to
the point. I guarantee you it is already happening. Because I can't believe
that people. I just feel like people can't. When I started, I
started hearing people say, oh I can't watch There's some people saying they can't
even watch videos in normal speed anymore, Like there's tension spansh just completely.
I've heard that too. So like even when it comes to porn, they
might be like, fuck, this is not progressing enough. I'm gonna watch
subway surfers or people doing those sand sculptures or whatever while fucking like the dude's
waiting to get it hard or so whatever what ever. You know, they
they'll do something. I feel like, porn is porn, so your brain's
newity, so you really go to it, you know, I mean you
think I would. I would like to believe that, but I have definitely
skipped a long porn because it's taken too long to get to the point.
Yeah, God forranstantaneous buffering, because yeah that because now you can remember.
Wait, guys, guys, let's se let's see how old you guys are.
Do you remember not being able to watch Porner because they didn't have a
flash player, and you're like, god, damn, I can't watch.
I was sorry you have to have a flash player, and you're different.
Joba script man, that's fucking that's some that's the classic stuff right there.
Man's like, Man, my fucking iPod doesn't have a flash player. God
damn it. You can throw your eye stupid times. I was going through
my bookmarks because I have bookmarks, Like, over the course of my entire
life, I have bookmarks so much, so much porn. It's ridiculous.
It's like it's probably not so much. It's probably like like I probably have
like eighty bookmarks, which is a lot, to be fair, but like
I would go through, right, and I would, and I remember,
just like I have too many of these bookmarks. I should go through and
like delete because like, surely some of these videos are not here anymore.
Let me at least clear these up. And it was like a good like
seventy percent of them, we're gone, And I was like that's crazy.
But then I could still see, like what the what the bookmarks were like
called, so I would like, I wonder if any of these videos are
still up because I'm curious. It's like I wonder, like what the fuck?
Because I could see the first porn video that I bookmarked, and I
was like, what the fuck? What? What? What was this?
And so I Google starched and I found it and it is like one forty
p It is like nuts, like you can barely tell, you barely tell
that it's even porn in the first place. And I'm like, you know,
I watched this and I was driven crazy by it. I was like,
I was like, I couldn't control myself out of this video so much
that I bookmarked it for future reference, and like, I can't even see
what's going on here. I can't. I'm not even one hundred percent sure
it's a woman in it because it's so blur. I only I only have
to go by like sound and where I assume a dick, like the colors
of a dick would be if color properly. I was like, god,
damn, this is like do you have a do you remember a go to
video like that you have? Do you remember like what I know, you
just mentioned that one? They were coming back to me. No, it
was just the first one that I that I realized there's brad break brodiums.
I didn't catch it at first. No, do you I have I have
one that I don't know if I mentioned this before. I almost feel like
I did. But uh, there was a time where I was like I
was fascinated by chicks to squirting. I just thought it was like, like,
what what is this? And uh so I did mention it. Yeah,
it was like and she was with this chick name and I didn't like
because she had short hair. She had like almost a buzz cut and a
gap tooth gapping her two front teeth. Named a bella donna or something.
I know. How do you wait? Wait? What was it was?
It was? It was? It was out, it was outside bro oh,
because they have three scenes. They have three scenes. There's a there's
a couch one with them, there's a couch there's a bad one with them,
there's one with We're so old that we all how many people listening right
now? I was like, I know that one too. I don't think
any I think I think too many of them are kids. We gotta move.
We don't have that many. Second you said this second week he said,
man, this second he said short teeth or short short teeth, short
hair gap shoot. I was like, Yo, no way, I'm watching
that video too many times. It's crazy and probably well over a decade.
I need to go look it up. Dude, I got it's been a
very long time. Held up. We gotta I want to start watching porn
for the for the etiquette of it again. Correct, I want to get
to that point again where I like, I watched porn for simply like hmmm,
I want to I want to watch worn back down rabbit hole. I
want to watch porn like I would watch like a family movie. You know,
no, not like a family but like a movie that I remember,
like nostalgia, you know what I mean, Like, let's watch some nostalgic
porn, just like have it on in the living room. It's like,
hey, you remember this. It's like, oh yeah, I remember the
scene. Oh wow, what a performance? Like like ause, if it's
like this, if I watch, if I watch half the porn I watched
when I was younger in my house, Lily's like, what are you doing
watching this? Like really mundane hugging it was horror when I was going when
I was going through my bookmarks, a lot of it was like remarkably mundane.
Like and I don't I don't consider myself like I don't consider the stuff
I watch I watch in my adult life particularly crazy. But like I especially
like the stuff that used to work. I'm just like, this is just
it's just people. There's existence I definitely went too far. I definitely went
too far for a bit, and I had to I had to ring it.
But I had to like rehealth the eyes of my brain towards pornography because
I saw a girl put a dildo up her ass that you could see in
her stomach once and I was like, this is see I saw, I've
seen that. That that disturbed me. It was like, this is disturbing.
I can't watch this stuff anymore. I gotta like get a healthy mindset.
Every time guys call to action, Call to action, what's up?
I've called action? Uh? I need help finding a video that I made.
I made I made. I made this as a joke. I sent
it to the band too. Uh. There's a death metal band or Death
Corpse specifically called the Partisan Turbine. The song is called Inertia. Now.
I only bring that up because I made a squirt compilation and I sent it
to them on my Space and they were like the haha, this rules like
they they spotted. They loved it. I made it to that song basically
it. I don't think that video exists anymore because I it was on MySpace
and I uploaded it on god knows what fucking side. I uploaded it on
uh so if sadly, baby, some people are better at searching. Man,
if anyone could find that shit, I would It would blow my fucking
mind because it was probably like two thousand and seven or eight or something when
I made this, because that was my That was more of a when I
rediscovered because as a kid, like younger, I was like, squirting's pretty
cool. And then I like read this when Internet got better around that time,
I rediscovered it, and I was just like, this is crazy.
I read Rainy Vagina. It's wild. Yeah, I discovered I couldn't care
less about anymore. Though it's kind of I feel a little sad. I
literally don't care anymore. You got to it. I comp completely lost the
passion for it happens in real life. You're like, oh, oh,
this is cool as I thought it was when it happens, when it happens
in your life, it's just it's like it's like now it's like a project,
and now it's like I feel like when you know the fucking uh balloons
blowing up, you know, like it's it's cool, but it's not a
dude, let's listen. It goes anywhere else alright, almost made a message.
We gotta move on, we gotta move on. Let's question, let's
getta you really, let's move on. This next episode is called Cytherea,
it's that's it, all right, she's on Twitter somewhere. Let me go
give her a shout out. You know it's actually you know, it's actually
crazy. I remember I put a cytheria video in a in a YouTube video
of mine and I can't exactly why, but it was like I wanted to
get it flagged or something like. I don't I don't remember what the fucking
why did I do that? Another I think because it was like because I
think I had it in the background while I was ranting. I was like,
you hear that, that's the sound of like this happened. I think
I was trying to make the case that like something was amazing to the point
where like here this this is you as a result of this, and I
had it on screen, but it was like blurry. It was like her
getting railed by a funck machine. It was like and the video got the
video got flagged, even though I blurred the ship out of it, which
I thought was kind of lame. But whatever, Uh, let's move on,
Let's get the fuck out of here. Let's got the degenerate lands.
Jesus Christ. Yeah right, we'll send her heart on Instagram. She's on
there. YouTube's algorithm created a children's mix for me, and the first song
was you Got a Dick and Me rode in It says, hey, y'all,
not a question, but a story. In the two Mad episode,
Chris mentioned that his lost remote and Derek brought up his glasses, which you
guys haven't found for some bizarre reason or another. The same thing happened to
me while I was building my brother's PC. I needed to remove and replace
the motherboard's lithium battery to manually reset it, and in doing so, the
part that holds the battery didn't lock properly and flung the battery past my face
and towards the wall. But it didn't even make any noise. It wasn't
anywhere, It wasn't anywhere in the nearly empty dining room, and I still
haven't found it. I had to use a spare battery out of frustration that
would It's something's going on. I think something caught and disappeared. It was
like it is strange these are strange things that occur. I don't, but
I'm convinced they happen like that. You could not convince me that it's simply
somewhere here like it's gone, it's in a different plane. I fully believe
it. I fully believe it. Have you guys watched a Halloween Town two?
Yeah, where it goes into the fucking the guy's house where everything gets
lost? That so stupid? That is that? What that is? Because
I want an explanation. There's a monster or like some character in Halloween Town
two whose house is the house that everything like if you drop something in I
think it's specifically like if you lose something in the couch, right, it
ends up there. If you if you put something down and you try to
pick it up and it's gone, it's in that place. That's that doesn't
even make sense as a sentence. What are you talking about? You try
to put it, you put something down, right, like you like you
put something aside, and if you immediately like, oh I needed that,
and you go looking for it again, it'll be there. I'm pretty sure.
In the movie though, like the conceit was that like if you lose
something in the couch it goes, but I don't know whatever the whole point
is, like it's it's where all the lost items go. And I'm sure,
like I'm sure there's something like that where there's like there's just a hole
in space somewhere where like everything goes. I wonder if it happens to fucking
people, Like I wonder if I was looking at like how many children are
there? Right? Like exactly, like imagine imagine Kingston. You go to
my apartment, right and I'm like, all right, I'm gonna go use
the bathroom. And then I go to the bathroom and then I don't come
out, and then you go in there and I'm gone. The windows like
not open or anything. There's no like signs of there's nowhere I could have
gone, Like how would how would you feel about that? Like what what
is your reaction to that? Would you just like leave? Would you just
leaves? Like what the where's Chris? And then like he goes like a
little bit a few days in here from Chris, a podcast comes up.
We call and get him, like I will go to We'll do the next
day. It gets to a week. No, Chris, you would wait
a week before you notice that it's a week. It's a week before.
Like we're like, all right, Chris, this has been gone for a
while. I won't know where you went. We call your phone. What
I wonder what what's making the funny? I wonder what you're going through right
now? Like you're list in a place where there like side out where like
you know, after she falls down to like the lower level, there's about
the ship and just like where am I at? I don't like that explanation
though, that it's a long time. That's a long time. No,
it's not you do you should call it if I go into the bathroom and
then I'm not there, Yeah, no, that should be immediate. That
should be like within the day. You're like, especially because you're gonna be
implicated like yeah, you should exactly. So you kind of have to do
it for a walk, dude. No, man, So you saw him
in the bathroom and he and I think you have autonomy. You can do
things on your own. My poly all right, So next time you fall
asleep and don't wake up, I'll just be like no, wait, oh
wait, yeah away from oh wait, there's blood pouring out of your mouth.
It's like he must have had an allergic reaction. I'm sure he's fine.
I've had allergic reaction a little bit. Give it some time, don't
rush to the point, dude, ship forgive me for one to save you.
Unlike Lily, who would not repress. It's been like three hours,
he's still bleeding a lot. So can you can, king say? Can
you pull up the iPad that you were you were pulling up before? Yeah?
You pull that up? So like there's a I thought it was his,
uh, and it has a drawing of Disneyland on it, which I
was about to I was about to go off on him for it was like,
Bro, you can't have an iPad with a drawing of Disneyland and and
then claim to not be a Disney adult. It's insane. But apparently it's
Lily's. And apparently Lily drew that, which is uh, which is crazy
because I did. I didn't know Lily could draw. I think I only
saw there was one instance. I think I saw her where she was drawing
a fresh cup of piss and I said what is that? And she said
nothing and quickly shut it out of shame? Is that, honey? No,
I could back you up on that. I could back you up on
that because I literally was going to say the exact same thing. I think
that's pretty funny how both of us have only seen her draw piss. Yeah,
it's weird. It's not really helping her case. The idea of her
like being so in love with he draws. It is crazy. Like she
takes time on her day to really sketch, and she's like, I can't
do this, man, everyone's gonna make fun of me. She can't.
She's like, I'm really trying hard to capture the glisten, but it doesn't
come through well in pastels. It's honey, it's not honey. Oh man,
she uh uh piss Queen Merch coming soon. Stay tuned, guys,
Merch for Lily, and we're gonna have her draw. We're gonna make her
draw, but then like we're gonna like add her face and the we're gonna
not have like leave the face blank, you know, so and then and
at the last second we'll have somebody else draw the face. And then then
literally so much if she was the number one selling Snark Tank merch, like
by I will have like the best like all the other ideas that we have,
like they'll sell like three two, you know, six, and then
the piss is thousands thousands of shirt fucking soul. These people in different countries
sending us pictures of them wearing a past drinking shirt. I remember I heard
of this podcast, but this fucking this shirt is fucking sick in a dope
ass shirt. I might check out this nart tank. I don't know what
else? What do they do? Hello? This girl drinking pea on It's
real fucking funny, I would say. I would say, outside looking in,
if I saw somebody wearing a shirt of some girl drinking piss, it
would really intrigue me, Like, what the fuck is that possibly loo?
Can that possibly be? It's such a piece of shit. Oh, it's
a podcast, you're like, what, wait, what is a podcast?
Yeah? You know, just talk about bro stuff like man sphere. You
know, finances, fucking uh finances. Have a finance episode. You have
a finance episode where we get people stock advice, even though we don't know
what the fuck we're talking about. I think it'd be really guys, invest
in invest in fucking I don't know, coin is back put my life savings
and doge you guys think right now? I think best Buy is on the
up and up. Yeah. Uh, I put my life savings into doge
coin. What's he's so crazy? Fuck? What up? Hey? Uh?
The cream Man? Okay, so uh the cream and your sister spy
rode in, He says, hot, Hey, bitches, I have a
baseball bat signed by the entire twenty eleven Colorado Rockies team and haven't sold it
because I think it'd be funny to assault an intruder with it. You guys
got anything like that? I like that question? Like that? I like
like, you guys got anything like that? You guys just a real question.
I can't. I can't imagine anything that I would have that would even
be remotely like that. Like, I don't have anything that I don't have,
like a piece of paraphernalia signed by like a figure that I that I
revered, that I would that I would use as a weapon, Like I
don't. I don't have that. It's a little too niche, a little
too niche. Specific I do have, Yeah, I do have a basketball
signed by like like a very famous player, like not here, but like
in my house in New York because like my mom knew knew him or something,
and like it was like a gift, and I was like, I
don't. I was like, thanks, but I really I don't know who
you are, and I don't care either. I didn't say that was a
mixture. What was it? Do you do you remember the team? At
least I don't. I really don't even remember the team. I could.
I probably text my mom and ask her, but like, I don't know.
It's somebody who, like I see in the news somewhat not not in
the news, but like I've I've seen his name like brought up like independently.
So it's like I know he's I know he's like a like a prominent
player, but like I couldn't begin to give a ship. It's like the
real cool, real cool of you to throw that ball in that hole.
It's really epics. It's really I'm really I'm really shaking at my knees at
the at the thought of this happening about letters from a guy named a doll,
I don't know. That would be so fucking crazy if it is directly
to me. See at that point, I'd be like, all right,
well, this is my second this is Hitler's like years before I was born,
years was like I gotta write this guy a letter. He's gonna need
this later, Like Grandma's like, hey, this is really strange. I
got this letter like twenty five years before you were born. But I think
it's something you can finally take it now. And I'm like, it's from
Hitler. He knows a lot about me. He's talking about dig you about
Hitler writing a letter to me in the past. For me now, dear
dear Kingston, don't drink the piss. Don't marry but don't do it.
Don't marry a piss drinking, fucking Mexican. Don't do that. Also,
don't Also, don't spend your money. Don't spend your money on digimond cards.
They lose value. DIGI mind, Hitler. I do what I want.
I do what I want. Hitler found and you lost. Hitler.
Can't keep me away from digitimon cards. Fuck you, Hitler. Yeah,
so stupid Hitler. All right, I have a jersey of a piece of
jersey of a of a of a dead guy. That's pretty cool. Oh
wait, I should specify. Yeah, so yeah, so he's he's murdered.
Steve McNair got shot by some chick and killed, and I have a
piece of his jersey it's pretty cool, so I'll use that. I thought
about. It's in a nice little paper to me. Yeah, I was
actually thinking about bashing somebody over the head with it. So I guess that's
the closest thing that I can relate to that other guy with that. Uh.
I Every once in while I stand over Jojo at night, was just
sleeping around four am, and I like, just yeah, I just think
about it and then I put it back. Yeah, it's like I can't
think of anything. It's like I love the idea. It's like I have
just some some object of strange historical consequence that it's like morbid, like the
idea of like having Hitler's mustache like his like Hitler's upper lip I have,
Like I have Hitler's upper lip in a in a zip lock bag, or
like I have Stephen Hawkings's gnarled finger and it's all like old and weird.
I want his jaw display. Yeah, I like it. I like the
lower Yeah, yeah, I like that. I like that Stephen Hawkings jaws
kind of like italicized. Like I like it. It's like palicized. That
is an interesting way to put it. His head is his head is in
italics. Like it's it's all slanted and sucking. So that is like a
crazy way to put it. But hey, that's so disrespectful. You are
so wow disrespectful. Is that incorrect to bring me vagina? Please? It
don't help the universe if I do not get to see now the universe is
in danger. A black hole, bring me a black hole. Bring bring
me on my micro processor. Squirt on my micro processor. Please, it
won't be very hard. Breathing is in fact attached for me theory, all
right, right now, the universe depends on it. But it's really funny
though. Cytherea found her on Instagram. Uh not sorry, sorry, I
found her on Twitter. She's she seems to be doing well, seems to
be doing very well for herself. Good for good for her, you know
her? Uh yeah, yeah, so everybody. Probably the reason. She's
probably the reason the sea levels a rising. But aside from that, like,
God, bless God, bless Hyberia that I've watched that one, bring
me The amount of water I've watched one of that woman is outrageous. God,
I don't know if you guys ever played you guys ever play? Do
you guys ever play? Anni Musha Warlords I played. I played Annie Musha.
I don't know about Warlords specifically. Well, it's just it's just the
original one. It's just called it's called Okay, yeah, then I did
play it. There's a part where you get you're you're with your partner and
you get trapped in a room and it's filling up with water. You need
to solve the puzzle before you drown. And I just feel like if you
literally got locked on a phone boo with her, it would be the exact
simulation of that scene, because like, I just don't understand how much liquid
could come out of one person with that. It doesn't make any sense.
And for visually, I think I'll put that scene up on screen so people
can understand what I'm saying. Great game, by the way, man,
great fucking game. I wish they would remake Didoul remake him and everybody's doing
fucking Japan feudal Japan. Shit. Now I'm gonna go yell at capcom is
because think about any other time in gaming history where you can point to like,
oh so so it was like Ghost second rouh, some ship that came
out last year, some ship that just is coming out this year. So
second came out. Secro came out in twenty eighteen. Dude, it's been
six years, right, but that came out. That's been a it's a
bit ago. It's a good bit that past five years I think is I
considered a bit like also wrong by the way. Also you're wrong, by
the way, Kingston. What Girstement came out in like twenty twenty? I
said, seka oh sequiro se and either way, eighteen it's something, but
it's two years apart. That's two years apart. Even twenty nineteen was twenty
nineteen, nineteen yea nineteen, and then the next year Goes came out Middle
I can't even remember the name of the games because I haven't played them yet,
but one came out last year, there's one coming out this year.
I think there's two coming out this year. I think State of Plate on
PlayStation. Yeah, like there's so it's just and then fucking I mentioned Assassin's
Creed is finally going to do one after being you know, hipsters about it.
So it feels like they're capitalizing off this ship and I'm like, great,
this game is going to be so underwhelming ewhelming imagine it would have been
if it would have came out around the time of the Eteo series, if
they would have just released one, it would have been goaded, which is
what everybody's wanting. Yeah, when you say when you say, when you
say Desmond, you ruin this is so funny you say that word, that
name, and then it it ruins the immersion of me even remembering how fondly
I like those games, and then I forget about those stupid parts of the
game that I hated doing. I hated the actual real world plot, and
then yeah, the other parts are just like memory ciphing, I guess and
searching for ship and why even going in the back, And then it's so
stupid that I wish they would just cut it out forever. Like of course
they've gone less and less with it, but still even when they still do
it the last game, the Viking one, I still get thrown out of
it, like like, imagine you're you're in fucking virtual reality, right,
and then someone just whips the ship off your face. That's what it feels
like. It feels like because the games are pretty fun to me, and
then I gotta do some stupid thing or some regular person. Now I'm like
excuse me, excuse me. You can come on, guys, you guys
gotta let go and you have brutal and having fun and then being turned into
a white man after it. You know, I will trans enjoying your brutally
transformed into I will say, I will say. For four Assassin's Creed,
I don't know. I don't like Desmond. He sucks his story. But
Desmond killed himself. But he didn't like himself. But I do love I
do. I don't know, man, there is something about those early Assassin's
Creedy games where I do. I do like the premise that it is happening,
that everything that is happening is happening as a result of this like technology
that's like going through like memory. Like I think that's dope. I think
it's probably that's probably the main reason. I think that's probably the main reason
that game stuck out, because I don't think that game would have stuck out
if it was just like, oh, look, you're in fucking Jerusalem and
it's like okay, no, you're you're right. Actually, I don't even
mind the first game and how they did it. It was so interesting and
the concept of kind of lert starting to figure out some weird ship. And
after a while it just started getting a little like not a little by three,
it was just stupid. By three, it was just fucking just bid.
Two is stupid too, Like no two, guy. But the thing
about two is like two was all so so fucking good that it's like I'm
like, sorry, is fucking so good. It's like it's it's actually like
it's upsetting. It's almost too good for the franchise that it is. It's
like it almost doesn't Assassin's created as a franchise, doesn't deserves as a character,
like sincerely like that, Like I don't know, man, you guys
like I think is cool, but I don't think he's like awesome, you
are shot. He's a part of that game. That game is so stupid.
I don't so dumb. I don't have franchise. I don't. I
don't have and I also don't I don't even really hate it. I'm just
like, what the fuck is happening? Like you're playing this game, You're
this really cool dude that's like friends with Da Vinci. For some reason,
it's like it's it's fun. Are you saying, oh my god, like
and have this problem you cannot be like, oh, I don't like this
is too because it's a really dumb moment. It's really dumb moments where like
every America's granddad was friends with a Lincoln. It's like that's so stupid,
like that the character where it's like I have a core can see character,
but I have a lightsaber, I can fly, I have optic beams,
I can't. I can use the Force. I'm a Zeno morph too,
Like it's okay, how do you feel about how do you feel about Miles
browse again? How do you feel about Miles mouse again? I think Miles's
powers makes sense because of which already immediately invalidated. But for you, but
for no, no, Chris Christian argument is dumb because you are. But
let me finish, all right. It's because it just feels like they're like,
oh and he and this is happening because this is cool, and it
would be happening because fun. It's I don't understand why you hate fun like
this. I like et CEO. I really really like et CEO. I
just think that that game world is so beyond stupid. It's like, let's
tell historical story. I don't know how I can think that I don't know.
I don't know, but I don't know. I don't. I fail
to understand how you can how you can feel that way about Assassin's Creed,
but then like gloss over every single stupid fucking thing in every comic book ever,
Like I just don't. I don't understand Chris, Chris, Chris.
The thing is, I don't I doing something stupid comics. I very much
so admit that stupid. It is stupid. Why he can already can control
electricity? Why is that stupid? Why is this character that the whole time
he's been able to shoot electricity and electrical people? How is that stupid?
And he's been able to do it the whole Turning it into a sword is
stupid? Dude? How is that so stupid? How is it so stupid?
Someone can create electricity and wanted out of his body, He can make
it burst out of his body, right, I feel like, look,
look right, right? Like if someone, if someone can literally shoot out
their bodies, right them being able to generate it in the shape of something,
though I think it's unnecessary. Why the fuck does he need to I
don't think he needs the sword? Point? But no, no, no
no, no, no, no, no no no. What you're saying
is the stup that he can do it. I'm saying the fact that he's
capable of doing it is fine. I think that he does do it is
a little bit much like he doesn't Spider Man doesn't need other powers. That's
why I stand. But I'm like the fact that he can do that that
kind of makes sense with his powers. That's not something completely different. It's
not like Miles Morales all of a sudden can turn his hips into pistols.
That'll be like insane. It's like, where the fuck did that come from?
He's never able to do something. You know he could? Why if
he can? If he can make an energy sword, he can also make
energy pistols too, you know what I mean? Could like if he could
do I agree, I agree, And that's what he could probably do,
because he already can shoot energy out of his hands, right, I think
that's unnecessary, But that's stupid the character. He already has his whole powersity,
that's right, it is, and I feel and look, I just
want to extrapolate it to Green Lantern. How anyone really you know, it's
all about their imagination. But I think it's so fucking stupid. I will,
I will, I think it's wild. I'll go in with that.
I would stupid the time if I had, like, if I had some
sort of power like that, it would just be the straightest linear lines just
piercing you. You would die so quick and completely. They also don't kill
people. But yeah, I understand, like, well, okay, like
so okay, I'm a yellow lantern. Shut the fuck up, you know
what I mean? Like this, if I was Miles, If Miles pick
up a sword and electrify it because he's sending other currents down it, I
think that'd be cooler. That'd be a cooler moment. Like he's fighting with
blade, Blade gets his sword knocked out of his hand. That makes would
be cooler for me. That would be cooler right right, Because somebody wrote
that because of the idea that Smiles can electrify things, would be cooler than
him being able to create a whole lighting for himself. I think that's kind
of silly. Yeah, but you know clearly as better than say silly,
silly, but use the word use the words makes use the word. Use
the word. It's not silly, what is it? I don't think it's
stupid because it would be stupid could not have that power before, Like if
he shot Superman's eye beams out of nowhere. I'm like, what the fuck
is this, Miles, that's never been able to do But why wouldn't he
Why wouldn't he be able to do that? Why? Why not if he
can create electricity because he's he can just manifest the electricity word. But King
said, if he can manifests electricity, why not, why wouldn't he be
able to like shoot fucking electricity out of his eyes and like a beam?
Like, why wouldn't he be able to do that? The thing is that
I understand. That's that's why I'm getting the point where I'm differing at I
think you're not unerstanding where I'm different. The fact that he's doing those things
in the first place is unnecessary to me, But I wouldn't stupid. It's
not unnecessary that they're they're already been. There's a notion for that already,
you know, there's a notion for what idea because he's already has those kinds
of powers. What kinds of power is like if he he already has electric
powers, he likes never not had those powers. He has the power to
He has the power to conduct electricity from his hands and shoot it generally in
an area, because electricity is unruly and very difficult to control. That is
very different than manifesting a hard light sword in a consistent He has telekinesis basically
at that point, because he's basically creating a force field. He's creating a
force with his mind around. You cannot that's that, no, Chris,
You're so no. That's like making that It's not. It's literally almost making
electricity come out of his hands. That's it. Oh my god. It's
like it's like saying, because I can spit, I can make a spit
sword out of my like that. It doesn't it, that doesn't compute.
That argument was so mother fucking stupid. I almost fell asleep because the sort
the sword is stupid. That's why you cannot just because you can spit,
Kingston, we can create electricity now. We can create electricity now. We
can create electricity now, and we still can't make fucking swords out of them.
We can't make fucking swords out of it. We can't do that.
Technology, power, story power. I think it's the way it was done
was not well done exactly, but it's like, I just don't understand why,
let's wrap it up, let's wrap it up. It doesn't make sense
to me that you would be like, oh fucking yeah makes Yeah, it's
totally fine, and that Jesus Christ, me and Derek literally came to an
agreement like, oh, that's unnecessary. If you don't don't think, you
don't think, if you don't think it's stupid. Yeah, if you don't
think it's stupidssary, if you don't think it's stupid necessary thing, you're wrong.
And and I'm just like they could have done much better because he can
make it, he can make a he can make an electric mech. Then
at that point, yeah, he can do an why not conjur anything?
Yeah? Literally literally conjured they escorting if you wanted, you can do what
literally literally So to me, I look at that electricity, but here's here's
where the disconnect is. Here's where the disconnect is though, right, okay,
so like that's stupid, but like you're okay with it, And it's
like, okay, fine, this is an absurd thing for Spider Man to
be able to do, but like, okay, you're fine with it,
it's on, It's it's unnecess Sarah, you say, but it doesn't bother
you. But then you're like, oh, this game, in this historical
game in in fucking Italy, It's like, yeah, why not have DaVinci
in there? It's fun, it's cool. That's stupid. What the stupid?
Because of all times, his most cool ancestor existed at the exact same
time the most famous Italian being ever existed. Hold on, so you would
prefer like not historical fiction, but like say, just what what what do
you want? Do you want Da Vinci to just be boring and have nothing,
like literally you have no convention like Mario, your cousin, not to
be not he wants to benually not to be in the game at all because
he thinks it's dumb. He's in there. Yeah, it's his best friends.
Da Vinci. Think about the design. I'm an assassin. Life is
crazy. Let me go play basketball, nigga da point. I think it's
silly, but it's the point of like video. It's like this is fun,
right, and and the I I think it's actually really it's like because
like, oh, how are we going to get like what how can we
get all these gadgets into the hands of Etio, Like, how we do
that? Well, da Vinci has all these fucking designs. Wouldn't it be
cool if he was like an inventor that and he was like the reason that
he got it's fun. It's it's not like it's not Game of throw it's
like kind of Jackie Chan Adventures. But like it's it's fun, you know,
it's it's it's silly fun. Yeah, it's all silly, like just
like the Sword the Conjured and the Sword silly. But I say, I
think that is stupid. And you know what I will say about three two
where it reaches that point of stupidity when you're doing the tank mission, when
you're doing the da Vinci's tank mission, that is just stupid, is yeah,
because da Vinci was like the first one to build a tank. But
interesting enough, he actually in his design he builds it kind of wrong because
he was a pacifist. But like in this you actually have the tank and
you're rolling around and you're shooting fucking like guards or whatever, and like you
get like a special achievement if you beat them all without taking a hit or
something. But like it's so fucking stupid. It's so like, let me
see if I can pull up ro fast. Oh yeah, it's just silly
as night ship where you're like creeping around with your fucking creeping around. This
is important. This isn't. This isn't. This is brotherhood. Apparently I
think okay switched up. Okay, so that's what. Yeah, but yeah,
I don't know, dude. You have to understand, like Assessin's creed
is like it's like he meets his cousin Mario and he goes, it's a
me, Mario, it's a Mario, which they're just having. It's a
me. He says, it's me. It's me. That's what I remember
that point for God says that happened. That's what I said. It's stupid
when I played the game again stream with me. Huh, I don't know.
He doesn't say it's me Mario. He says it's a me, And
I'm like, that's so, no, he says, does he say?
He says it's to me Kingston's He says, it's a me, Mario.
He says that don't look it up right now, you can find it me.
No, that's once again incorrect, But we'll move we'll move on.
What were even what were you even talking about? We're talking about assaulting somebody
like a bat and then we got here? Is that? What happened?
Was that the first question? Do we not move on? I don't remember?
I literally remember if we don't remember we moved on or that? Uh,
how did we get? Why do why do I remember? Why do
I remember? Mario and looking like super Mario? A little bit stupid?
My brain? I was just thinking of the seed, and for some reason
I remember, keep the sword? You could keep the sword? You look
familiar to me. Yeah, I'm you're fucking uncle idiot. It's me Mario,
and it's like it's me I. I almost turned off the game when
I played it again on Steam because I forgot about that seed. Like I
love this ship man, it is it is so shocky and just so it
is having so much fun with itself. And that's what I that's what I
think I miss, really is that, like, like I don't think and
it's honestly, honestly, sincerely, it's what's it's what's really getting me about
Hell Divers right now. Hell Divers has so much fun with itself that like
you can't help but like smile with it. Like during the loading screens,
you know how there's like tips at the bottom it says tips. Did you
know that tips appear during the loading screens? And it's just like stuff like
I'm just like this is I love I love this. When games were yeah
fun, right, I think that was the difference between them. Why,
like say Assassin's Creed three, for a lot of reasons, it was a
miss First of all, you didn't have Benjamin Franklin as your homie making you
ship, which was just a huge missed opportunity. It was also he could
have made you. Yeah, you could have done a bunch of stuff.
You could have found all the dead bodies in his basement or something allegedly,
you could have rolled the elephant that he had. He could have had a
conversation. He had a conversation with him where he said, like, you're
you're quite, You're quite not white. Showed you all his black all his
black half black children. Yea, look at these these are my lesser kind.
I hate these. Here's my lesser kid. These guys are there.
You know whatever, do whatever you wanted them. That's that game was way
too serious from what I remember when I played it, it was like way
too. It was like the Vibe four was kind of a return to just
being silly and wacky as fuck. Edward Kenway was a silly bitch and then
shooting people. I will say, Okay, I don't know how you feel
about this, guys. You know when you ever hear people say sometime a
game is too easy, but a lot of times when they do that,
they take the short cuts. And what I mean by that is you don't
have to take them. An example, in that game, when you got
the long pistol, it was just assassinate. It was too easy to assassinate
your targets with the long pistol. It had a lot whate range. So
you're supposed to do and this is always my funny thing the cut scenes.
You're essentially supposed to stab them right, assassinate them, and then it does
the cut scene of you like you're right in front of them. Then you're
doing the farewell kind of a thing. They give their little soliloque or whatever
the fuck, but I'm fucking like thirty feet away from them. They just
shoot them in the head and then all of a sudden, it just transports
me to them, like as if I actually killed them. So I'm taking
the short cut and just shooting them in the face. And people said it's
too easy. I'm like, you don't have to do that. You could
do the actual stealthy sneaking around the people, maybe not even cut off the
bells and stuff and alert the guards and make it more challenging. You can
do things. But I do think things should be classified as easy, just
because you can exploit the shortcuts. You know what I'm saying, Like,
should that classified is easy? You don't have to exploit the shortcuts? Like,
how do you feel about it? Yeah, it's kind of like Eleaning
because people were saying that about elden Ring. It's like elean Ring is easy.
It's like you could make you could make a build that makes eldan Ring
very easy. That's true, right, But I don't think but that's you
doing that, Like, yeah, I don't know, Like I think that's
tricky. I don't know how I feel about that actually, whether or not
that makes it easy, because I think it does, oh sensibly, But
at the same time that's it's I'm in between about that because I don't know,
Because yeah, I don't know, because like you don't have to do
aren't Most games aren't difficult. I think that's the thing. Most games are
really not difficult, and that's a huge problem compared to how back early early
nineties video games they're all hardest shit, Like to beat Mega Man two.
You'd have to give up a part of yourself to beat that game, you
know, being that game easily. But that was partly because of like the
design philosophy from arcades trying to get your quarters, you know what I mean,
Like that, like games were made impossibly hard so that you, yeah,
that's that follow a video game designed up until like probably like early PS
one, where people were like, oh, we don't need to do this,
really, we could just have we could just have fun games that are
good like Spiro's not hard. I think. I think. I think if
it's a built in mechanic that is part of the game and it's so easy
to exploit, then I would consider a game easy at that moment. Like
if it's like, if there's a cheat that you can easily manipulate, that's
one thing. But if it's a built in mechanic that is it's like,
this is what you're supposed to do and it works really easily and it's very
lower risk to do, then that game is easy. Then that's what I
just wonder if I guess the gate maybe would be okay. It's because I
imagine these things are put in for people who struggle so they can't exploit those.
But I feel like the people that are really good, I'm like,
you just don't have to do it. I feel like we'll just like go
in and to be fair, to be fair. Actually, and when we're
talk about Stas, because somebody would probab bring this up, Assassin's Created in
general, I always complain that they only had a because it's like they they
don't have a difficulty setting, and generally those games are too easy. They
they are just they're just too easy on average. As the games got to
like I think was it twenty seventeen when Origins and Beyond, I think they
did have difficulty settings, But before that all of the other ones there was
just one mode, and generally it was way too easy, like you kind
of just countered everybody and then if someone was shooting at you kind of just
ran in circles. Really, their AI wasn't that good. You kind of
just like you know, they would they would be like I'm gonna try to
shoot you and you just kind of just run and then they would miss and
then then kill them. So that part wasn't The stealth wasn't too because you
really didn't have to do stealth either. That was kind of the problem unless
if you're discovered and then you failed the mission. All the stealth was actually
a lot of times I would just run past people, you know, they're
all chasing you, and then you just go run up to your target and
then the sequence is over. Yeah, I do have to say I have
to do a shout out shout out to because they did. They put out
a VR game recently, Assassin's Creed, and I actually did check it out
because I was kid because that because to me, I was like, oh,
Assassin's Creed VR. Yeah, so that's that's that's like the whole like
hit to be able to do this and like the hidden Blade comes out and
like, yeah, no, that's that that tracks is something that I would
like to do and it's pretty good. Like it's kind of dope because you
actually do have to like stealth. You actually have to like sneak because fighting
is hard because it's VR and you actually have to do it. Yeah,
so like so like it behooves you to So it's I would recommend people check
that out if you have like a quest or something like. Genuinely, it's
pretty good. It starts a little bit slow because you have to like talk
to like your family and ship. Like it's got a lot of it's got
a lot of this weird like Triple you know, like in a Triple A
game, like you have these like smaller moments where you're kind of like walking
and you're having a conversation with another character. You do that, but but
there's like VR. It's in VR, so it feels extra weird because because
you just wanna you just want to fight. But the combat and the stealth
and like doing doing the hidden blade like by flicking your wrists is fucking dope.
It's a really good feeling. So those which it's called Assassin's Creed Nexus.
I'm not paying attention to the story at all, by the way,
Like I don't know what the story is. I think it's et CEO.
I think it's supposed to be it CEO, but like fucking I don't really
give a shit. But so many times, yeah, he's the best character
to sell the game. He is just I really never really did. I
really did love Seo, like like sin cl I was like, this is
the best thing that's come out of that franchise. But it's the only thing
that they even tried to like because when you think about it, I'm thinking
about any of the other games. All they have. They had all Tai
Year in the first one, then they had a thousand c O s and
then that's it. I think that I don't think they returned to anybody.
The Black guy from a Black Flag I forgot his name. He's the only
other one that that's half these and like his name A forget his name starts
with an A whatever it is. I remember he got he had his liberation,
he had his Liberation arc. That was fun. That was when you
get the fucking the Blunderbus. That ship is so cool. Dude, he
just liked this. He just fucking letshit people. I like that. I
love. I love French people. They're French people. They're actually you know,
I don't love it. I might jump into that today. I have
my have my VR and I just never use it. I really should just
use it because I do have stuff on there that like, I don't I
don't get that. I don't. I don't know. I always forget that
I have it. But that's a good that's a solid game for VR.
There's some games that just makes sense for VR, and Assassin's Create is kind
of one of them. I think, Oh, it's an all new story.
Interesting. Yeah, I have not paid attention to this story. I
just like being in VR and like Assassin that shit's fucking dope. Like just
I don't understand what VR developers don't understand about the fact that simply being in
the world is immersion enough. Like simply being in VR just honestly just let
me loose in like an open environment with like different assassination targets. I don't
need a store. I don't need a reason to do any of this shit.
I'm doing this because it's fun. I don't need like, yoh,
you killed my dog and now you gotta go kill this person killed my dog
and now you gotta go kill And it's like, I don't need I don't
need motivation, dude, I'm having a blast fucking just moving. Like the
same thing with a Spider Man game. I I do not you give me
a Spider man VR game. That's just an open map with like different sections
where villains are running loose. I'll make my own story. I don't need
I don't need you to write something for me. I'm in the I'm in
VR. Get out of my way, Get out of my way, get
way. That's how I feel. So it says in the game that you
actually so it uh you so? But that makes sense. When I was
looking at the screenshots, because one of them, I was like, I
don't understand the settings. They all look different. So you're you're three different
p You'll be et Ceo, You'll be Connor, which was the boring native
guy, and then a Cassandra from an Odyssey, which she's a she's mommy,
she's mommy. We like Cassandra, he only plays the other guy was
like, I get out of here. Then we you know, we modeled
her, have her. You know she's yead it, so it was only
her period. You mute out that would be That's a lot of work,
dude, it's a lot of work. Cod game out. You take out
every male character. There's a single male character, but your character. I
saw this mod. I saw this mod for a tomb Raider. The tomb
Raider collection where because in the in the beginning of the tm Rader collection has
like it's in the beginning of one of those one of those splash breens,
you know what I mean, like the ones that you skip through where it
says like aspire and fucking I don't know whatever studios and like this engine.
There's a screen at the beginning that says, like some some things in this
collection. It's it's like that Warner Brothers warning that they post before old racist
cartoons, you know, where it's like, yeah, these depictions here,
the depictions here were from another time or whatever. There's a mod that removed
that just skip it like it's the thing, the same thing with the pronouns.
It's so the same thing. Remember that, Yeah, and that and
that one game, uh Starfield they mounded out there like I don't want that
in And then I'm like, do you're doing extra work for fucking nothing,
dude. I think it's hilarious idea of modding out fucking modding out A sex
of the game is crazy that there's only female followers. Gail's a guy,
Will's a Gale's a girl, Will's a girl. Historians a girl Halson's a
girl, freaking makes it the girl I killed. The brief time that I
voice actors and everything you go hard. The brief time that I put into
three, I killed every male companion that I had. I killed them.
That's having a way harder time though, that's fine. I killed was way
harder I killed. I have no intention. Here's the thing, I have
no intention of finishing it or even really continuing to play it. I just
wanted to kill all the guys and the useful character. It's crazy. I
hate him of the game, I would say, other than Shadowhart, who
was obviously the most useful character in the game by one hundred is the cleric
Gail is so helpful at the end of the game because of Man. But
yeah, I don't like I don't like personality at all. I feel you
as soon as he needed as soon as he needed, like like when he
needed ship from you, like be his whole arc. I already knew was
like oh, and my second play through, I was like, oh,
I know you're dying so fast, like I knew, Like on my next
play through, I was like, you're the fact that I have to do
this for you to be around. I know I don't have to, but
I was just like I felt obligated my first play through and I'm like,
oh, you're so dead. I'm gonna know. You don't have to if
you if you rush fast, you don't have to do to give him anything,
right, I don't even know what happened to you. Well, I
haven't tried so every other So my my second playthrough, I know, so
my second play through, actually I just left him in the thing. And
then when I went in and terrorized the uh the the tee Flings. They
no, I didn't terrorize the tee Flings. I terrorize the the oh my
god, the druids. Then they started attacking the tee Flings and then I
guess Gail was there, and he's a died like that. If you don't
here's a weird thing, you know, if you don't liberate him from the
portal thing, from the thing he's stuck in, he'll show up in that
camp Soul shadow Heart, and then if you do any calamity in there,
they'll all just be dead like they just they worked. They're just on the
floor dead. And I I it worked. I think I resurrected. Oh.
I was able to resurrect shadow Heart, but I wasn't able to resurrect
Gale for whatever reason. Yeah, so anyway, but I'm not I didn't
mean to get into it, but it's I. I every time kill them,
the men don't let them. I just learned how you get what's her
name mythsra. I've just learned how to get her, how you can be
not, you know, not a piece of shit and get her. I
just learned. I just learned that. I didn't know. I never thought
about that. I got her luckily because of the fact that I was just
doing that at the time, because the first time I killed her, I
had to kill her. I didn't have a choice, right I just the
second time, I didn't do that and not on your team. And she's
actually she's I like her. But what pissed me off, though, is
why I didn't think that would work is because I tried to do that with
with with uh Will with his dad. I tried to so so I I
did a whole I was trying to like speed run essentially, long story short,
I was like, if I can actually take out him, who's that
piece of shit's name that's controlling Will's dad? What's his name. Oh the
he's one of the three Gortes. Thank you. So I was like,
I'm gonna try this. I know it's gonna be hard. I'm gonna just
rush and try to beat him with with nothing, deactivated everything. And then
it turns out it's too hard. So then I cheated because I just want
to see how it would work. It was too hard. It's just too
hard to do. You have to be like too goaded and uh so I
just knocked dude out still died, and I was just like, ah so
I didn't even think about you can do that with the other way. But
anyway, great game, man, I on the real hard mode is insane
like that. I won't even try. They have legendary actions, so they
have actions where the enemy can move at the end of your turn and do
sh it sometimes that it is so stupid and that's so game. Oh you
think that, Okay, Well, when it gets too hard, this fun
gets stuck sucked out of it for me. Oh no, man, I
know what. You know. It's a great game when you keep even though
you have a backlog. I keep, like my mind keeps drifting. And
they just had patch six drop and I was like, fuck, fuck anyway,
Boner's gap yet. Come on, get on it, guys, yout
on it. It's it's fun. It's fun, guys. And then if
you don't like it, it's fun, you know that's not fine. It's
it's almost I think it's it's too good of a game not to like for
me. Man, it's not bad at all. I don't. I don't.
I wouldn't say I dislike it, but it's it's definitely not my kind
of game in a lot of ways, or at least not yet. I
think it's I feel like it's like a Witcher three type thing where it's like
I'll probably get back to it in like a couple of years when I'm like
feeling it a little bit more, because like that happened. Like dude,
I played The Witch of Three like five times, and like the first four
times I was like, this is not clicking for me at all, and
I don't know what it is. I got pretty far in, but then
like Sacred, I had to do other stuff, Like I put like thirty
hours in, so like I'm about halfway. Yeah, it's halfway. I
never finished it because it's like but I used to, like I would put
like five hours in. I would put five hours in and I was like,
I don't I'm not feeling this at all. Like there's something about the
way that like Geryld moved around, like if I felt like he was he
had butter on his feet or something. It was like strange, like it
always it always bothered me. But then they added that modern control thing.
They added like some like a modern control toggle that helped a little bit.
And just for some reason, like four years later, I played it again
for like the fifth time, and it was just like, oh, okay,
it's clicking now. I don't know why it took this long, but
it just does sometimes. And I had, uh, there's Elvis I think
actually was talking to me about not to me, but like he was talking
on Twitter about what is it? Uh death stranding, like how you like
he went back to it and he was just like, oh, I really
like this, and I don't think he liked it before. That happens with
games sometimes, and I'm open to that happening with Paul this Gay three.
I'm just like I got away for a year where there's a lesser things happening.
There's like too much happening this year. I thought this year was gonna
be like kind of a drought. But there's like a lot happening, like
Fantasy right around the corner, Giant Giant games, but yeah, big games
nonetheless, if you know, if you know what I mean, Like,
oh, the the major ones were all expecting kind of already blew their load
last year, but then there's all these other fucking companies, dude, random
surprises, like the fucking random surprise like the battle Battlefront coming back, like
the two Battlefronts. I'm I'm I'm just curious about that. And then the
it got it got. I wish it wasn't. I don't know, it
wouldn't have mattered anyway, but like I just which because it got leaked about
elden Ring, right, it got leaked. Oh yeah, it'll it'll be
out, It'll be out in June. I was like, fuck, it
just makes me feel overwhelmed because literally, fucking uh, Dragon's Dog with two
is about to come out. Tech and A just came out. Fucking everybody's
enjoying Hell Divers and you get the fucking Star Wars and you're here, and
I was like, bro, stop get like I'm trying to beat this fomo
feeling and it's just getting worse. It's rough, it's getting way. It's
yeah, it's really fucking rough. Like there's just too there's too much.
Which is good. I mean, like you know, we're getting a lot
of good ship, but like fuck, like even even right now, Final
Final Fantasy Rebirth is coming out, I kind of got this feeling. It's
like, you know what, I'll I should finish Final Fantasy seven. I
heard it. It's amazing. I heard my friends playing it. Young right,
huh who you know young yet? Right? You know him definitely?
Right? Yeah, if I know him, you definitely know him. I
spoke to him about it. He was like, yoh, it's amazing,
and I was like, I'm a static. Now I've more with him before,
Yeah I haven't. I haven't talked him in a hot minute, but
yeah, like that's yeah, he's in it. But when became friends to
him? Not through YouTube? Isn't it hilarious how we met him not through
YouTube? That is weird? That we met him through Joe, That is
that is strange. That is like a weird like oh we like I'm yeah,
that's that was strange. I wouldn't say I'm friends with him though,
Like we only had we only had like a handful of conversations. I like
him, he's good, but like you know what I mean, I think
people get people get too flippant with like the word friend online and I don't
like that if I was, like, I know, I'm not very close
to him. I do know him right right, yeah, but a lot
of people that I know him. And it happens a lot when when in
the in the context of like we will bring people up on the podcast and
and like it'll be like, how could you have you talked about your friend
like that? And it's just because like we either had like a video together
at some point or like we we tweeted back and forth online many many years
ago, and it's like, these are not Internet people's idea of friendship is
very weird. It's it's very weird. Yes, yes, it's it's very
weird. It's very very, very very strange, almost like a cult like
type of embrace in a way that you you you met and now it's almost
like your brothers like hello, brother, Hello, it's this is your brother.
Now this new person is not your brother like kind of a thing.
It's like hold on a seconds, yeah, and it's like we're cool with
each other. Yeah, this this isn't war, you know, like we're
not blood brother, We're not like bonded through like the trials of war.
Like it's not, We're just we just were on the same platform and that
we've overlapped on some occasions. Like it's not I think it's it's very strange,
like and I've seen people kind of get I've actually gotten messages we're not
many like this happened like maybe twice in my life, but like you know,
enough times to notice where like human like hey, I saw you said
that we were friends or whatever. It's like, what's that about. It's
just like I like you dude, Like I don't I remember being so taken
it back by that because I would never I would if somebody said, if
somebody that I liked that I was on good terms with, told me that
like we weren't friends, I wouldn't be like I wouldn't take that as like
we're enemies or like they disliked me. It's just like there's a these are
classifications. These are classfic and they mean something like a friend of mine is
somebody who is my friend, is somebody that I would like talk to about
like serious shit, or we hang out a lot, or we even even
or even if we just like work together to the point where like, yeah,
we just hang out and we talk and we like a lot of the
same stuff. That's that's one thing. But like somebody that I just kind
of know, that's an acquaintance. There's a word for that. Just because
it's kind of a long word compared to friend doesn't mean it's not like a
useful term. Like I have many many acquaintances on YouTube. I have very
few friends on YouTube. Yeah, I think I think saying in my language,
I just say I'm cool with like, oh, I'm cool with this
person, and that that classifies it as that. And if I hear somebody
say like I'm not friends with somebody, a lot of times it's coupled with
context too. So it's so if somebody because you could say like, I'm
not friends with that person, and then if you hear the the stink the
intonation exactly, or you might just be like, I'm not friends with them,
but we're cool, you know, because then there's that little extra just
kind of a clarification, and uh, if you've ever said that, Chris
I'm sure it was coupled with something and but that it didn't get relayed that
way. It's it's very rarely with it with a sense of like stink on
it. It's very rare. It's just like, oh, yeah, we're
cool, we're not we're not friends or anything. You know. That's usually
how I'll talk about it. Yeah, we're not friends. We're not friends.
What do you mean? You know? It's just like we've hung out,
we had a beer one time. You only really look God, I
you know you, dude. I have this conversations with all the respect,
like, dude, I like you. I like you right, Like I
got no problems with you, but you you only ever invite me to anything
or reach out to me, like when we happen to be in the same
place. Like if we happen to be at like a party and I run
into you, then I'll be like hey, then you'll be like, hey,
come to this thing next week. But you'll never like text me that,
you know what I mean. It's just like, so we're not we're
not We're cool, like we like, we like each other, that's fine,
but we're not friends. Okay, because a friend of mine would be
like hey, I Hey, they'll text me, like even Jack Jack's films.
I would consider like at that at that line where it's like you are
you're kind of a friend of mine because he'll text me every now and again,
who like, bring bring up something. It's like cool, Like I
like the yeah, we are friends. Granted there's a tear system to that.
I wouldn't call him to like vent or anything. But I don't know.
I think people I think people need to just kind of I don't know,
cool cool anyone never you only that is the biggest. That is the
biggest. Anyone you are. You're the the amount of times, the amount
of times that it's like, oh, I got a fucking everybody in the
world is will gonna be in my house? And like I'm like, you're
so it sounds so tedious, but you're like why do you Why does it
keep happening? I love having people over Christmas here we were talking about talking
about it. Lily can't stand how much happen over way too much for you.
The thing for you is the thing for you, I think is that
the the your current dwelling does not accommodate how often you want to have people
over it's very small. It's too small for the amount of people that you
have over there at any given moment. It's kind of nuts. And I
always wonder why so many people though, because I understood when we were younger,
like let's go flock to this one person's house, like let's just do
this all the time. But at a certain point, I feel like you
get a little bit older and you're like, I really like my setup.
Maybe you know, you have some people come over this time, but then
like all right, maybe we'll go. It's kind of like there's a little
bit of a a division, like we we can kind of there isn't just
the one spot anymore. And and and I kind of want likes it you
got because I feel like it would be like he said, literally, it's
got to be taxing on this people. You can't just keep the thing the
thing that happens. I've always lived one. I hate this, but being
fucking pottery and Caribbean, I was never out people over in my house ever.
It was always like no for me, instantly, like a no,
no, okay, come over right. And I was always at my friend's
houses all the time. That was outdue like if I wasn't out playing basketball
or sleeping in my house. Literally, I was like at one of my
friend's houses. And then what happened was when we moved over to California,
we met Joe. Joe was our friends that were always over at that was
the person had like the center of the universe house we always yeah. And
then what happened is after that we moved to California, and then what happened
is consistently we've had the largest house out of all of our friends. Mm.
So people always come over to where we were all the time. We
had the largest apartment where we were just rooming with the most people, like
we needed the most better department. Yeah. And then what happened is I
moved in with my other group of friends with Ben and Me and everybody,
and they have the by far the largest place ever, so that I was
supposed to get devit. Everybody over to after that and then again mine they
said, oh, if everybody over come up to my mouse. Now now
my house is like way more quaint and calm. We've been in my house,
Derek, we talk about you've been a mouse, but it's one more
quaint and smaller, like I could have like maybe two three people over would
be three four, But there have been times I've had like eight people over
it and Lily's like it's too small for that. Yeah, it's just like
stop stop it please. Everybody. Everybody has a seat, everybody's having fun.
See people sitting on their people sitting in a bathroom, look at it.
Everybody's fine. It's weird. I have the space and the seating,
and I like, I have the space to do it, but I just
never I don't know, I always forget to do things with my space.
Really, like I don't. I don't know if you get I do I
do because I'm like, I don't know. You could offer, but subconsciously
I could. Yeah, what you're like, I'm good. I do like
the idea. I do. I do like the idea that at any point
when I'm out, when I'm out, I could retreat, you know what
I mean? But like if I'm here, it's like I can't. I
can't retreat. I don't know. I'm also just tired. I'm so tired
lately. I think I think I'm just I'm old, all right, I'm
I'm I'm thirty, but inside I'm like fifty six. So like, I
don't know. Man, it gets to it's like eleven pm, and I'm
like, I'm ready to ready to hit the hay. So I feel you?
Who knows I feel you. Let's move, let's get let's get two
more questions and before we get the fuck out of here, a lot of
people over. I hate going to people's houses now though, which is really
crazy. Why you have people over? Is that why? Yeah? You
don't like just fucking I'd rather than a people my mouth so I don't have
to leave afterwards. That's fucking like. Man, I gotta get back home
and ship man whatever. I guess I'll see later. Oh my god,
my mouse, Like, everybody go home now, already, get out,
start shooting about the house violently, fucking I guess that makes because I don't.
I don't really like go anywhere either. Yeah, hello fat, Oh
wait, call me a goony, Call me a gooney the way I chunk
with my sloth nice man, Hello fat, Bob Marley hot invisible and visible
Stevie wonder question in a biopic in a in a biopick movie about the snark
Tank, who would be the main character, secondary character and the antagonist?
Who the fuck would be the antagonist of the snark Tank podcast. I can't
even imagine, right, No, but your part of it. Yeah,
wouldn't we have like an adversary? We have we drawn any I R from
anyone. I don't think so I did. I did get into I just
forget. I just remember this. I did get into a little bit.
I cut into a little bit of a I wasn't even the guy it was.
I made a fat joke about that that heel versus babyface guy that freaked
out about the pronouns. Yeah, yeah, because he he he he uh
he's fat. Yeah. Recently, well apparently it's not anymore. I guess.
I don't know, but like he he recently was crying about rainbow flags
at grocery store and he just he tweeted them. For fo's sake, I'm
just trying to get food. And then people were like, then just get
food, right, And then so I just took a screenshot and I was
like, as if that stopped you from getting food, you know, I
showed a picture of him. I don't fucking like, I don't follow that
guy so clear. I don't know if he's been working on himself, but
apparently he lost a lot of weight because I'm assuming because he got humiliated and
everybody made fun of him. There's like woa jacks of them now and stuff,
so we probably was like, oh, show them and he started like
throwing up and shit became balimic. So you know, I guess he lost
a lot of weight. Good for him, But I gotta say I have
to say the look it's a good like for real, like you can eat
whatever you want and then throw it up and then like not gaining weight.
It's pretty I mean, low key kind of cheat, kind of sick,
kind of epic, kind of fucking dope, kind of sick ass, kind
of sick, fucking dope. Just called me wild, that's crazy. I'm
not crazy, believe me. I'm just saying it's like a it's a it's
a it's a it's clever. It's a clever trick. I would say,
uh in moderation, you know, it's a you know, it's a t
money. Why spend money on Ozempic when you can just throw up? Who
the fuck is Ozempic? He's one of the Greek gods, one of the
Greek gods. He's not you know, he's not even Yeah, oh so
I drew the ire of his fans, and I guess the quartering ran defense.
It is funny because I didn't hear from the guy himself because he probably
didn't give a ship. I don't know, you know, he's probably not.
It didn't bother him the way that it bothered so many other people.
It was crazy. And then even the quartering got involved, and so I
kind of want to like have some I want to have a war with them.
As far as in this this movie goes like something something with like the
I don't know what it's a it's a civil war thing. I don't know
how this happens, but it gets. It's one of those scenarios. And
the baby faced guy in the cornering there. It's the premises they're they're trying
to they found. They found they have a serum that turns them all into
how they you know, how they all look they have like beards and glasses
and ship and they looks you know, they found a serum that it turns
you into those people like they all like, hey, we want everybody to
hate rainbows and pronouns. And then you look surly and ship and we're like,
no, that's dumb. That's we're just doing our podcast and like,
all right, well we're coming for you. We're coming for you, guys.
We're good. And then they're trying to they get Sweeny first, and
then he becomes like our biggest adversary where he's white, yeah, and has
a huge surly beard and he just woached on the up about the l g
B t Q community. Yeah, he turns into uh, he turns into
fucking quintin Reviews. Yeah, it would be for some reason. We're kind
of ignorant to it as well. Though. We're like, we're like,
are you okay, Kingston, but like you clearly you look like Clinton quintin
Reviews. But like we're we're like not sure. We're like something, something's
different. I gotta make a I gotta make a ten hour video about Carly.
I gotta do it. I gotta do it. I can't, I
can't. I can't stop me. I can't stop. You're gonna have to
kill me if you don't kill me. If you don't kill me, there
will be another ten hour video of Mike Carly. You gotta if you don't
kill me, kill me. If you don't kill me, out kill me.
Oh man, God damn. Anyway, is that true? Is that
is that? No? Go go go? What is what it's true?
Is what true? What are you asking? Does I don't Does he actually
have a ridiculously long I Carly video? Is that he has multiple? He
has a video, he has he has several, So okay, so he
is one called Uh so there are there are various Nickelodeon shows, right,
uhs No, I'm talking about like the teen show, like we know about
I Carle, but there's like Salmon Kat and like Victorious and these and yeah,
I Carly these things. So he has videos. It's like, okay,
the collapse of salmon Cat nine hours thirty minutes, nine hours, Okay,
so that's the longest one, to be fair, Samon. Wait okay,
wait, I'm sorry because I'm looking at what you're looking at now.
Yeah, in what god, it's lunacy, bro. How the decay and
the collapse. What's the fucking difference in the premise, Well, one is
when it falls down. Decay when they disappear. Yeah. Yeah, So
here's the thing. The collapse of s and Cap nine hours thirty minutes.
The decay of salmon Cat six hours thirty minutes. Uh the failure of Victorious
five hours and thirty minutes. Uh, I binged, I carly good name
for video, by the way, four hours and forty five minutes. Uh,
the scandal of Salmon Cat five hours. So yeah, I mean this
guy, the failure, how does do bro? The failure of Victorious five
and a half hours, the end of Victorious. You have to understand the
thing. The thing you have to understand about these videos is that I'm pretty
sure these videos are longer than the runtime of the entire series. I don't
like, I don't, I do're not They're not right. I'm convinced they
are. But God, because an episode is twenty minutes, an episode is
twenty twenty two minutes max. So that's like what you figure you might say,
you say what you're assuming there's only about twenty episodes. There definitely is
more than twenty episodes, are there? Well, I don't know. I've
never seen these shows. I've watched over twenty episodes of Victorious. Was this
forty eight minute videos about McDonald's what a what a fucking this? What is
this guy just he's just throwing sh it up now, like he just doesn't
do any fucking work. Only forty Derek, do you remember when I don't
know if we should talk about this on the show. Do you remember were
you there when we shared the Airbnb? Yes, just leave it, We'll
leave it. What a fucking that guy? He just disappeared to that thing.
Strange that guy, dude. I just want to say this, This
pissure is off so much. And I've said this publicly before. I think
I made a video called uh Quentin reviews as a tool like a Twitter trash
because it was him he started it. He was starting He like went out
and started saying some dumb shit, unprompted from years ago. It was like
some it was around that vidcom thing, and he prompted to started talking shit.
Nobody was saying anything. There was nothing trending online. He was just
like, I'm just gonna come out and fucking virtue signal. And then so
people started flaming him and then started talking about how fucking weird he was at
the vidcom. But we all went to somewhere I don't remember where. It
might have been a bar, I don't fucking know, but we were all
trying to get ubers back to the same fucking place. And it was hard
because there's so many people trying to get back. He snagged one did not
invite anybody in the fucking car, not one person. A fucking piece of
shit, asshole. I was trying to be all going back to the same
fucking airbnb. Yeah, Quentin reviews. I don't know. Maybe maybe he's
just very social, but like there there is he's fucking like he he talks.
I've heard him talk about like yeah, it's weird, like people like
people always end up not liking me. I don't know what. I don't
know why. And it's like maybe just reflect on how you act around people
and how maybe you're a bit inconsiderate. How about that be a little bit
like I don't know, like he's just yeah, I don't know whatever.
It's not, it's not that important. He's it's just old. This is
old ship. But it it does, it does stick out to me,
like to the point where it's like, yeah, I mean, dude,
if if everybody around you just unanimously doesn't like you and you're aware of that,
just maybe I don't know, man, Like, I don't know how
that doesn't raise some flags for you. You know, it's strange, but
let's move on to h Let's get onto the fucking credits. Get the fuck
out of here. Let's get on at here. Thank you everybody. People
don't like nobody. I don't get everybody hates you. I don't get they
don't like me. They're all stupid for not liking me. I'm really likable.
I'm a good dude. If they don't like their dumb they're stupid.
If they don't like me, it's their I don't know. I don't think
I could respect that of view. Yeah, yeah, it would be better.
It would be a lot better. I like people. People don't like
me. I don't care. But there's instead it's like, people don't like
me, but I don't really get why, and I think kind of it's
everybody else's fault. People get so mad that I ship in their toilet and
don't flush. It's like, bro, that's your toilet. People. If
if you don't like me, if people don't like me, here's here's the
thing. If if if anybody comes out and they're like, if anybody comes
out and they're like, I don't like Chris, I understand I don't because
look, man, I'm here, I'm here, I'm around I'm around me
twenty four heaven, I'm not. I'm not thrilled either, so like,
yeah, totally like whatever, that's fine. Uh but like I've never had
I've never had that, uh that per that experience in real life online.
I'm sure there's no shortage. Yeah, I've had that. I've ever had
somebody. What happened? One girl that hated me, Kayla Rivera? I
remember this bitch she before on the store one hated me? She fucking hated
me. I don't know what did you do? Literally nothing? That doesn't
sound right. Our friend groups were tangentially near each sounds like, sounds like
a quitting situation. I'm I have my shortcomings, but this is back when
I was like trying to be nicer to people because I was at high school.
She was obviously a girl that was dibbing some looking looking, so I
was at least not rude to her. I was like, maybe I could
pipe that one day, so I'm actually like, you know, sow some
seeds of like kind of half nights this sure, you know. And she
just hated me. She hated me so much, and my girlfriend was friends
with her, and I was like, why does she hate me? Too
much, and she was like, honestly, I really don't know. You're
like not a really hate able dude. I just she hated me. He
never found out. Well, that was very rude because of her hating me.
I was super rude to her one day. So do you think it's
possible? And this is just all I'm doing, just spitballing right. A
lot of times when people don't they they A lot of times when people you
don't know a reason. A lot of times there are, of course is
a reason, but it could just be you're completely self aware. Could it
be maybe she actually wanted to smash but you were with Lily or something.
It was way before Lily. This is like I was way before Lily young.
It was like young, Oh, I was in like tenth and eleventh
grade. She just hated me. But then I was like really rude to
her that she had a reason to hate me. After that moment, because
I was like super rude, I was like, what did I do?
But before I said, she should give me a stank face, like I'd
be talking, like everybody'd be talking. Then I would talk and she'd give
me a fucking thank faced you ask her, and I'm like, why,
I don't How can you never ask? Right now? I hope, I
hope you have nothing but bad times. I hope your nightmares are ceaseless,
and I hope you're waking days are full of agony. Fuck you, Kayla,
stupid bitch. God damn, I don't know, man, no reason
to hate me, Bro, I was you never asked? You fucked up
to her? Dude? I would ask where she at? Where she at?
Go ask her? I'm you know what, bitch, I'm gonna go
on Facebook, bitch, don't that's the first thing you say after all these
years. Yo, it's been like, Bro, it's been I graduated high
school twelve years, it's been like thirteen years out of nowhere. The fuck
you don't even Yeah, just just say what the fuck is your problem?
That's that's it. Don't put anything else. She's gonna like, what what
did I do to you? I was thinking that too. I was thinking
that too. He was actively meaning to me. I was like, out,
you know, I just remember my homie had a similar problem, but
he actually attacked the guy. So I was pissed off because I missed it.
We're we're walking down the hall in high school and he was like,
I'm gonna go I'm gonna go fucking attack this guy. Somebody egged him on
to do it, and I was like, okay, whatever, and I
turned the corner to go to my class, and literally after I turned the
corner, he ran at the guy and assaulted because apparently he just said there
was this guy fire, there was this guy that was just always mad dog
in him. They never spoke, and he was like, I don't know,
this guy just has a problem with me, and and so he attacked
him. He just attacked him, and I was like, I'm so mad
that I missed that, but I could have just waited like five seconds,
and then he fucking went wolverine mode. It's pretty cool. He really funny.
She's a single mom now, it's hilarious. God God for God provides
bro. The Lord provides bro. The Lord provides bro. The Lord provides
She's still stuck in the hometown. She's a single mob bro. Lord provides
man. The Lord provides bro. That's all I got. This guy swears
he's a good person, this gentleman. Right. Look, look, look,
look I'm not a good Look. I'm a human like everybody else,
and I have my moments with spitflomn right, but the Lord provides. Bro,
that's all I gotta say. Ask if you shall receive this high schooler
was me to you and you're like, good, you're a single mom.
Good. I hope the dad's bad. To hope he's not even that around.
I hope he's gone. I hope he can't show back. Oh my
god, please do the countdown. Curse this girl anymore? Fuck that bitch,
three two one. If you're listening to this podcast and you're friends with
what is Kayla Rivera, send her this clip. Oh my god, I'm
I the I'm sad it ended, but I'm glad it happened. Motherfucker's after
I put them in. It's all right, it's okay. Don't worry about
it. If you get canceled as result of this, by the way,
if she has anything on you from when you were an asshole and then like,
I mean, you know, we got no choice. I was,
I was so yeah, but it's your word again? What is it a
woman's word? No? Wait, guy, don't don't so because I I'm
a it's a woman and I'm black. No matter what I lose, she
can say anything she can say anything. Is she black? Kingston did some
crazy ship to her? Is she he raped? He raped the whole building
full of people, and that's it. I'm gone. The coms will come
in here and take me away. And I'm like, y'all believe that,
y'all a whole building does that does something That horror will go so far that
it becomes impressive, like like she is black, Like she is black?
You were able to rape an entire building of people. You're like, god,
damn, that's crazy. How did he do that? So crazy?
It is that that really does Like you're at the You're at You're at the
prosecution taking notes because you're like, yo, we have to invest in technology
to preventing the drains. He crawled. He crawled through people's fucking faucets.
He's fucking up their pipes, bro crawling through a dish. He's the most
prolific. He's the most prolific serial rapist of our time. It's like,
what, what why? What? He has? He has no bones.
He just slides through like a fucking octopus through a quarter size hole. It
just ends up in your fucking and then because he has no bones, he's
like not very rigid. So he's like he's like he's like a series of
wet towels, and it kind of just sounds like it's literally just an octopus,
man. It's just it's just an octopus. Man. He just and
he just raped the entire building. And the judges like, you know what,
I will reduce your sentence if you tell me how the funk you were
able to do, And he's like, I'll get off scott free. Well
do he's just doing the wave. He's doing the wave back and forth.
Well, Doc, it's because I got no bones. I hope you got
time. He sits down and the detail explains, I does it his whole
lot, His whole body is like his entire body is like Stephen hawkings jaw
where it's like we're it's kind of like it's a little off and a little
italicized, a little bit slanted, you know, inconsistent. All right,
what the fuck? We can't we can't keep it? All right? We
started this already, and we were we got one name, Dave, David
Radden, Mick Jackal Gay, Norman Osborne be like I'm something of a sodomist
myself, Sween using using, using Swen's curtains to wipe the sun come off
him? How do you make the names longer? It won't let me jack
the world's fastest majory. It's fastest, not fast, you clown gay z
be like baby, why don't you just fuck me in the asshole. I'm
losing my mind with this hassle storm my castle. Uh. Mario comes on
Goomba's with his new friend Fappy Chris Reagan more like Chris gay ray gay.
We are almost come gay butt sex gay gay peepee stupid big meat, he
stinks. Andy the man whose handies are str and Dandy call me a gooney
the way I chunk with my sloth. I am the ascaper and I ride
and I ride, I ride through my boy's backside. I catch the loads
coming out of this guy. Heath Smoker selling The Lifelong Family Dog for four
hundred and fifty keys on TF two. Thank you for listening to the com
tank gay cast Cringe Gay con Dog two keys. Digimond took Sweeney's leveto homeless
transfem who was in a who has a town insider lick tre Pussy and iambic
Pantameter. Uh, Derek, you've shattered my shakashi. We smoke a hussin
bolt dick. Joe Biden's inner thoughts are dial up sounds. I like that.
Yeah, probably fucking carry on with the Britton slander. Shit sucks here,
mister pants uh swen. I would greatly enjoy it if I heard you
got tag team by Lilli and Derek's wife with with twelve inch strap ons.
Baller of the First Sin that was added. There was something new added to
that. I think Baller of the First Sin Spumbafutter's umbrella, pineapple, trampoline,
harmonica, tornado, bubblegum, lighthouse, radiator, windmill, crowbar,
pajamas, zipline, jolly old dipshit. I am not straight. I have
relationships with men and sex with women. I've got news for you. Pro
Pane is a hell of a drug. Nice, I'll tell you what tofer.
Laser, pistol, cipher grab gay Peter Parker be like, I'm gonna
put some dick in your mouth. Two mad six under, why do you
film me up? Filming me up? But whole? Come gabe me just
to dig me down, dick me down, jerk me off until you burst
in my balls hell divers to be like service that capacity. Please try again
later. No need for the fire truck, sir. No, no need
for the fire truck, sir. I'll ship on it. Uhs a fire
out. It's a real wild enough that buildings the idea enough out that you
would have enough ship to to to smother a fire's wild. Yeah, he's
like he's took ship all over the building. He stops the build for burning
down. People don't want to go back in their apartments and get everything.
Everything's covered and ship. I'd rather just let it burn. There's at least
fire insurance. Now my house is just ship covered. It'd actually be I
think I would be. I think I would be really upset. It's got
a worse actually, pictures like your fucking dead parents, your luggage, all
your fucking memorabilia. Worry dad's ashes, don't worry, I'll fix it.
Turns around. No, No, it is the loudest, fucking the loudest,
most egregious. It's a it's almost like it's snowing ship like there's particle
you know when you open a fire hydrant. It's like that. Just it's
it's lay completely uncontrolled, ship lacing it. And that is a big fire.
This is a big the fire is out of control too. Oh,
ship so hard, it's snowed ship some kids outside, some kids, that's
he's like that. I'd be so what would they do that? The color
because he thinks it's snow. They're dumb, They're dumb. Brown snow.
This snow is dark skinned. It looks white. It looks white because it's
it's nighttime and there's fire. So it's just like it's the light reflecting off
of the brown snow that makes it look like it could potentially be just like
it's just like the red light bouncing off of the snow. It's like maybe
it's red snow. And you that's fee straight up, that is feces.
That is fecal. Man that some four years some five year old kid,
that's feces. Sir, would have to kill the guy that did that,
no thinking it was snow. I'd have to kill that person. Oh you
gotta die. If I saw the guy shipting on the fire, well see
here's the problem. I wouldn't tackle him because he turned around. He'll blast
with that hurt, you'll hurt. Put it on the fire. He would
definitely kill you, for sure. It's really like a fire. You gotta
throw a rock at him really hard to get him to stop. You gotta
you gotta somehow distract it. We gotta like one of the anime moments where
you, like, you run past me, throw a rock and the rock
bounces and this is it gets near him, he just attention. You can
knock him out, hopefully, But what if he while he's unconscious, What
if he if he goes what if he's holding back because he's conscious and when
he's unconscious, it's full. The entire sounds. It sounds like it sounds
like Niagara Falls and a bubbling cauldron like at the same time. Just like,
keep the names please. I'm in the I'm in the justness of Jisery.
I'm giving this man top. He's got a penis like an hour glass.
It's thicking, kind of long. I mean, could better. I
think for the rest of it, and I think the rest of it.
He's got a penis like an hour like an hour glass. That is fucking
crazy. But I think I'm stuck on that. Here's the thing. But
here's the thing about this, It's just I'm in the justness of Jisery is
so next level good that like, I forgive the rest of it for being
kind of like bland, you know what I mean, it's like you can
you take I think this should be one of them that we write. I
think it's just too good. That's too good of a first line to not
use would kind of hard. The I mean, it's hard to say.
It's just the courus is just still it's not it's not an. I don't
think either of our ranges we can get. We can get a female.
Whatever Kayle was for the hook, I have never seen her once even like
any of that gay ship like it's people be hit like the like. But
I don't know. She might do it. She might do that have to
pay It doesn't find that we have to pay her. No, absolutely not
never. Uh come comes Superpowers being confidently wrong. But I like men and
drag. I don't know, of course what I want. Dont comes an
ivy sweety superpowers being comminently wrong. Back to the tank, Come the Caucasian
container of the crackerbill for gays. Donald Trump burping on Dom's clip. Sorry,
Uh, that wasn't mean Yeah, I'm perfect. Sorry, I don't
have gas. There's no sorry sir. Uh clamping clamping open. Sorry,
you dirty Mexican clamping open your eyelids to come on their eyelids. In Gump's
voice, my wien has gone all big. Jenny, do you know anything
about that? Jen? A, I got a pain as like an hour
glass, Jenna, Jedne have you heard of psytheria? Jenna? Can you
do that too, Jenny? I want to lap it up with not a
drop missed. Can't even take put it on. I wonder he put it
on this. Oh my god, imagine, guys, guys. Imagine you're
out in one day, right with you, guys. Friends, You're like,
we're gonna go. We're gonna go to a diner. Gets un real
quick. Your friend takes out this bottle, gives it a few yanks over
his fries or his fucking or salad or whatever you like. What's that?
Oh? Yeah, there's some squirt that carry with me. I usually put
on a rod eat before. It's just it's just the idea that he says,
just a bottle of it that he says. It's Oh, it's just
squirt, the squirt I got. Bro, you ever got to like TG
or anything like that. Puts it on your burger and then it's it's already
on there. You ever been to any of those Mexican restaurants, like you
know, like where they it's your birthday or whatever. They get like the
tequila and they put like a shot in your mouth and they have a whistle
and they like fucking like shake your head around. You ever done anything like
that before? Yeah? Like that, Like, but squirt, she pip,
get on my pippa possum can't smell And Chris is kind of right.
That was so disorienting. Man, fast car, But gay, you got
a fat cock. I got a plan to bust in a queer. I've
been working on the at the Penis store. Managed to spray a little bit,
uh store. Penis Store set down average clip energy frozen, throwing frozen
turkeys off the interstate to create half live zombies just the hard r Star coffee.
Hey kids, it's okay to ship whip acorns at cops. Comed to
death by early twenty ten's Jennifer Love Hewitt. She was another person that I
remember that Jennifer I don't really know. I don't know any of her songs.
I remember it was build incorrectly where they thought Jennifer he would sang one
of the tracks from Sailor Moon. Uh it wasn't her, a song called
My Only Love, but it was. If you were to download it,
it would say Jennifer Love Hewitt and I'm like, it's not her is an
actress. I thought she was. She's she's an actor, but she has
some songs not they're not They're not. She ain't popping on Spotify, I'll
tell you that. But like you know, she probably have a couple hundred
thousand monthly listeners she had. I like that, yeah, I mean like
they weren't like massive, but I liked the I remember when I was a
kid, like because she had a one of she had a see through top
on something and some award thing, and I was like, oh, Jennifer,
I like her now because she's from well, didn't she want used to
fuck Michael Douglass or am I thinking of somebody else? No, that's Captain
Jada Jones, wasn't she. I think she might have been in one of
them. She was in one of them, I think, yeah, or
something. I don't remember. I just remember if maybe if you put in
like, uh, see through top, that you'll you'll find the picture that
I remember her. That's forever brain burned in my brain where I'm like,
hey, uh see through top titties. It's pretty cool, man, I
likepp up nice, nice, nice, very cool n nice. Oh yeah,
all right, she looks very Oh yeah, dam, I don't do
that. It made me want to play the game. I stopped paying my
rent so I could be a real fan. Transferm gramblin exposing people would like
usin Thomason ninety million rogins of ionizing radiation. You she's not Vinpann and Jel
like, dam, I want your I want your loving each? What is
this? I want your loving each? Oh, I want your loving even
though we're both men. So please put your hand down my pants? Bad
romance? Nice? Oh, I want your loving even though we're both men.
I see It's okay. It's a weird point. It's a weird part
of the song to choose. But oh that horse no no no, no,
no, no no no, So please put your hand, please put
your hand down my pants? Really like man whoa mo yeah a fucking fat
whoa fat Craiger Canadian Richard Fist and the spare testicle Where to come from?
It's your boy, Shawny de Benegery's monkey. I live in Philly, and
everything you guys said it's true. Also, I just saw horse running down
on ninety five by itself. I just I can't. I really, I
really have a hard time conceptualizing horses as wild animals because they're so associated with
just like tools. To me, like a horse, like a horse standing
by itself is a fucking asinine image, like I cannot like that is like
no, I understand that. No, I understand that that's I understand that
that's literally true. It just doesn't register. That doesn't seem like I don't.
There's something spiritually about that that feels wrong, because there's so I didn't.
Yeah, yeah, it would be like seeing a free range washing machine.
Like I don't. Okay, yeah, see I don't. I don't
purely see them as inanimate tools, I mean, which is domestication in a
way that I probably didn't see them as wild until I played Red Dead Redemption,
and then I was thinking like, oh, yeah, of course there's
be a bunch of wild horses. They all fucked a bunch and then they
were just running all over the place for a while, like the Spanish brought
them over here. They fucked each other and then they fucking went everywhere.
That brought the Spanish. Yes, horses aren't American animals. They're not.
They're not native to America. I thought, I know there's because I know
in like in New England as wild horses. Yeah, they I thought.
I've always thought, because you know your kid cowboys and Indians, you just
assumed Native Americans are here, horses were here. But no, no,
they actually they brought them to the Mexico. It's like there's something that it's
like seeing a bull or something where it's like I can't conceptualize a bull outside
of a setting that's surround. Yes, yes, they're still around. They're
still around. They're not. Are they very endangered? They're very endangered.
But yes, buffalo are still around? Are they buffalo? Yeah? Are
buffalo around? That's an amazing question. Today bison living. It sounds stupid
as hell, Yeah, but today live Yeah? Uh well yeah, is
that erchange? Because I know because I've had bison meet several times. I
just it was like the same. Bison is a bisexual buffalo. According to
according to Google, the f out of here, Get the fun out of
here. I'm not junking that's what it says. That's what it says.
The bison have. The bison have ear rings. Yeah, the bison had
the bison the bison have their nails painted. And that's how you know the
Uh, Yeah, I don't know. I actually don't know. It's just
says bison living. I googled our buffalo around and it's it's just the the
The Google response was today bison live in all fifty states. So I assume,
like I don't buffalo still around up Currently there are approximately twenty twenty thousand,
five hundred planes bison in conservation herds and an additional four hundred and twenty
thousand in commercial herds. Well, bison are longer no longer threatened with extinction.
Oh okay, the species uh faces other challenges. But so are they?
Buffalo? Are are bison? Buffalo? We'll see a buffalo bil There's
a very different when you look at them. They look very different in a
way, like say, look at the bison and the same thing. I'm
sure, well probably in the state I mean relative, But if you just
look at how they look, a buffalo versus the bison look very different.
Oh so here, so apparently buffalo buffalo are native or indigenous to South Asia
and Africa, so they're not like bison are found in North America and parts
of Europe. But it's it's they're more they're native and in those plays.
So you're probably more likely to find wild buffalo and bison there than you are
here, because I feel like here is more like I don't know, farms
or something or conservation stuff. I don't know, Yeah, I don't know.
All I know is that I see bison meat every once in a while
this grocery store, and I grab it. Bison bergers del are similar to
the idea from like Wolves of Coyotes, probably, but that makes sense.
I can see that. I have to read into it because I just feel
like stupid, Like I just I mean, they're all they're all dogs whatever,
everything with four legs, everything's a dog. Everything's dog. Cats aren't
dogs. Cats, cats are dogs, Cows are dogs, horses are dogs.
They're all fucking dogs. You you say that, and I actually I
put anything that looks adorable. I put puppy on the end of it.
So if I see a horse a horsey puppy. If someone came to me
and they said, look at the Horsey. I would kill that person.
I would kill that Horsey that had the fucking was it Army's that had the
Horsey sauce or something? Yeah? Yeah, that is such a fucking disgusting
I hate it. I hated so much. You know, I wasn't I
wasn't sure if it was I E or E Y. And that's how I
found out, because like, I saw somebody post a meme about it's also
post the meme about you know that ragged bone guy that I'm only human or
whatever. They posted a thing it was it was it was a vosh meme
thing or whatever, like oh when you accidentally have whatever, and it was
his face over you know that the guy. And then I was like,
I wanted to put I'm only Horsey after all. I wanted to type that
in, but I was like, wait, Horsey. And then so the
auto completion was Horsey sauce. And it pissed me off, it really did.
But I was like, Okay, that's how you smell Horsey for sure,
and just it just made me think about it more, like would you
ever eat anything called Horsey, anything like Horsey sauce? It's disgusting? Hey,
babe, could you grab me some Horsey sauce from the store, like,
honey, Honey, I know, I know you're your way home.
I know what you might have passed you. Please grab me some Horsey sauce
before you get this. I'm real hungry for Horsey. I'm real hungry for
Horsey right now, like I could use some Horsey. It's some Horsey.
Please. No, that's finish. I want to do something other than talk
about Horsey sauce. That's good. A right, all right, Chief chief
Voice. You're listening to ninety eight point three Smooth FM, the classiest station
in DC. Next up. Next up is Ship in the Woods by mackel
Moore. Uh three ex no way inventing a new sect of Islam where you
get seventy two boys after blowing up the bathroom, slurp and stroke and smoking
joking Emoticon's going like this, Drip and mas Lord of Homeless Trip Joe PESHI
killing Batman by putting his balls in advice. Obi, won't you blow me?
Uh uh? Norwegian Gabe dev No loving relationship, loving relationship, big
fucking deals, big deal I got in my pocket? Do you think we
care that you're in a love like? Do you really think, like,
like, who, like, keep that ship to yourself, bro, Like
I will care as long as he keeps paying us money. I don't care,
man. Whatever, YouTube's algorithm created a YouTube is agly that created the
children's mix for the first and the first for me. In the first song
was you got a dicking me satorio gojo Nah, I'd win, Chris is
old l. I don't know what that means. I don't know. I
don't know what I mean this is. And then they're referencing the fact that
we're talking aboutaisin last time. You are telling me that it's not popular.
I never said that. I never said it wasn't popular. I said it's
not it's not it's not the most popular anime. And I never said it
wasn't popular. I said it's not the most popular anime. It's one of
the most definitely, okay, but it's not the most That was the entire
crux of the argument. I wasn't saying that it wasn't popular, certainly that
it's one of the most popular. Now, okay, So that's what this
communication on the play. Yeah, yeah, because it's like I'm sure it's
popular, like among anime people, like I know, like Jalen talks about
it like I get it, but like I haven't like come across it in
the same way that I would. Like, there's no there's no painting of
I don't know fucking jiu jitsu tizing characters outside of a taco stand in Mexico,
you know what I mean. Like, it's just like it's there's there.
There might be. Hispanics love animated bro, It's crazy. I don't
know why they do. They love it. If you tell if some guy
is like Dennis not thus and it's gonna kill you, like would Goku like
that? And he'll be like so stupid? Uh? It does do jiu
jitsu. Guys don't have anything to do with actual jiu jitsu, like the
fighting style. Yes, no, I will never watch it. I will
never watch one second of it. Now, I feel like I feel like
I never I never thought you would. You know, It's like I never
I would. I showed you. I showed you guys a clip of it.
When we're at last time, I'm glad I don't remember it. I'm
very happy I don't remember at all. Good show. I'm not it's called
jiu jitsu. It'd be like watching like a box suit boxing bakugan and there's
no boxing in it. Like I'm not watching that ship are you talking about?
That's how I felt about Rocky. It was like, there's not a
single rock in that movie, and I was furious expected whole Rocky in that
movie. There's no I'm gonna watch. I'm gonna watch all of the movies
and I'm gonna find the scene where there's a rock in the wrong. Doesn't
he go rock skipping in the movie. Maybe he skips rocks and pretre he
does that. I've never seen a rock that might be Mandela there. You
know, I've definitely seen I've definitely seen the first rock. I know that.
I don't know if I've seen the rest of them. I don't know
if I've seen the rest of them because I remember the part where was like
where he he basically like, I mean, he's kind of he gives off
very rape energy with with Adrian at certain parts of that movie, and I'm
like, I don't it won't leave her alone. I don't know if because
he's saying like she's kind of retarded, like Paulie is being like she's kind
of she's kind of like, you know, a little slow and he's one
of but she kind of sounds it. Somebody, get get this off my
screen. This such a I just I'm gonna raise your kids. I'm gonna
raise your kids to bully you. Yeah, this is gay, bro,
that's insane. I can actually raise I mean, I mean, statistically,
I can. I know about you. Yeah, kids is gonna abandon this
kid's day one, I promise, I'm so sure of it. He's gonna
be like, this is getting in the way my Didjimon so hard. I
can't even I can't play my dicha mind without changing a diaper. I'm sick
of this. That's I'm not that's crazy. You think that's crazy. You
think you have a choice, You think it's not gonna just happen. At
some point, it's gonna happen in Lily. Lily is gonna Lily is gonna,
let you know, five months in she's gonna be like, by the
way tomorrow, tomorrow, And it's not bees, it's a sawn, it's
not the bottle of bees. These times, I'm actually I'm patching. I'm
actually weirdly good with with kids up to a point, like there's a point
where I'm kind of once they're like eleven, It's like, I don't know,
I like elbowing them in the face. It's pretty cool. Children adore
me, and I hate it. I know whatever, pedophile hate it?
I hate It'd you go there? Why did you go there? You weirdo?
You're fucking creep. This guy is talking about how much the children love
him, and he he loves them. He's salivating and going on. In
fact, said I hate kids. He said, you said you love kids.
You said, you said you have kids so much that you have a
hard drive dedicated to them. Right, that's what you said, he said,
Like, I love kids so much, I have a hard drive full
of that. This freaking pedophile kids love. Look, I just think it's
weird. I just think it's weird. Like whenever I go to your house,
it's so sex. I think it's weird that whenever I go to your
house and I open the door, I come in and you're running into your
room with a hard drive labeled kids. I think it's weird. I think
it's weird, Like I don't I don't know what it's the Mac Miller mixtape.
Bro, what are you talking about? Like just just like he's got
kids on his computer. It's like and it's just it's just a Macmiller mixtape.
Oh man, holy fun. You said you said hard drive, So
I'm sorry. I pictured him like with a Western digital like a Seagate hard
drive and it says kids on it. He's running into his room with it.
It's like, dude, what were you doing with that? What are
you doing with before? Like I feel like that has to happen, like
like somebody look at this fucking idiot talking two miles away from the microphone,
just like it has to be. There has to be things like that happening,
where like someone calls the cops or like like something's going on that's not
it sounds really terrible, but they get there and everybody, everybody just like
this is a good laugh. I saw I saw a post on Twitter.
I saw a post on Twitter that said showed somebody was like I called the
police or I called the fire department because I saw a fire burning in an
apartment and it was just a really big TV with a Yule log on it.
That's that's that's when you know you're too fucking nosy man. Let's me
know you're too fucking nosy. You're like, oh, it's yeah, you
think you're the only if there's a fire going on? Do you think you're
the only one who noticed? And like I have to call the Like I
like I'm saying, it's just like at that point, you know, some
people let me let me. I tried one time to do the the freeway
of Favor freeway was kind of smoking, like a patch. It looks like
somebody threw something on it. I'm like, Jesus Christ, I'm gonna turned
into a big fire called the fire department. Like, yeah, we've gotten
several notifications, like you know, appreciate it though, And it's normally oh
yeah yeah, no ship, no ship, Derek, no ship. I
Am not the only person in the world that passes by this place. Can
I say something before you move on to the credits. I don't normally crank
it to images, but this Jennifer Love Hewitt Share top thing is doing something.
It's not bad. It's not it's not a bad image at all.
It's anyway image especially it's not amazing, but there's something about it. It's
like it feels welcoming, is what it is. It's like I feel safe
a safe an image in so long, bro, it really has been.
It feels primitive. It it feels like start trying to It's feel like trying
to cook your meat with a fucking twig and a rock lighter, Like what
I doing it and shipped. Let's just finish it, dude. I don't
know where we even where were at even? You know, honestly, guys,
I lost my place and I lost my place, So I think I
think it's best. I think it's best if we just start again, if
we start from the top. Uh, just read every name in one word.
What we got to read the name guys, guys for coming? Yeah,
all right, driven age, Lord of homes. We read these read
these Norwegian game dev Oh yeah, yeah, I'm gonna steal your bones.
They were made in a factory, a bomb factory. I've come so hard.
It's shot so far, but the but in the end, and that's
it. You didn't finish. Come on like that. I like that he's
relying on us to finish it. And I actually think, um, so
hard, it shot so far, shot so far. That's good. It
is good. But I don't know what I don't know. It's it's like
the Sopranos find episode and then it just wants dead. He's gone, hey,
I'm Tony, I'm dead and that, and then the show is that
what happening? For no reason? It didn't It got shot so far in
the end, it didn't even splatter I had. I don't even oh,
that's what it went down his throat, like straight up just didn't even killed
himself with his own nut brow. What's happening? One gay? I don't
know why. I don't know one gay gay. I don't know why it
doesn't. It doesn't even matter how hard it's. It's the same thing the
rest of that. It's like, I'm gay. I don't know why.
It doesn't even matter how hard to try. Keep that and I am gay.
Time is a valuable watched by by Pendulum swings. Let's count down at
the end of the day of the clock tip slaph away, I am the
watch better look at the window fell apart, be my me on time I
tried. So it's the regular song. Now it's a regular I like,
I give it. Interrupt There's something that I like that I did that interrupts
Like I am gay. Time is a valuable thing. Watch it by and
if every time it's I am gay. If I can find the a cappellas
of like both of their vocal I'll chop out the beginning of his parts and
put I am gay and leave everything else the rest. I would absolutely do
that project. That's the thing that's changed. People are like, that's becoming
your gay covers. You just insert I'm gay into it. Then you start
getting lazy as covers that I like it. I like it a lot.
Hell yeah, so watch him. I don't explain to a guy. I
don't explain to a guy. I was in the sauna and he was asking
me about my tattoos if I knew anybody, and then we got into a
conversation I did. I really didn't want to tell him. I really don't
want to, Like yeah, so like what do you do? And I'm
like, you know, whatever, this podcast, whatever, what do you
guys talking about. I was like, you know, and then like it's
like I was like, fuck, I don't I don't want to. I
don't know how this guy feels about this stuff. And then we got onto
the things about my He saw my Instagram could week change Instagram? He's like,
oh damn you I have so many views and I'm like, and he's
like, what do you He didn't see, he didn't hear anything, and
I was like a quick disclaimer. I was like, it's yeah, yeah,
it's the songs. I just do parodies of them, you know,
like just in thirteen year old you know. I was just trying to soften
the blow. And I'd be like, he looked at this guy garbage and
let think about penises, dude, and people think it's funny. They think
it's big funny, big p b big funny. And I'm just like,
how do I how do I ease this guy into this without him thinking I'm
a maniac. I constantly, I constantly get punsituations with Lilly's family like Kikesley,
what do you do? Wait? Getahandois and I'm like, uh,
uh s podcast uh counts, receivable accounts payable see uh dundas dundas podcast?
Uh s I YouTube uh Joe Rogan Experience someone a lot of the podcasts,
and it's worse because it's in Spanish. So I have to like, all
right, I gotta speak Spanish. I gotta remember what words I have to
say correctly, and I gotta I gotta lie them away from the podcast.
I don't want to. I'm not fluent. I hate when my family finds
me online and luckily they find dude, I am embarrassing. That ship is
because you remember what that guy said one of our one of our listeners said
something like, I try to show my girlfriend our stuff and what did he
whatever? It was something, yeah, some bullshit whatever we were talking about.
She thought it was fucking awful. And that's every episode is is we've
built, We've built, We've built, We've built a show for such a
specific type of person, and it's like, because this is Look, there's
a lot of podcasts that run like a very there's a lot of podcasts that
run a very tight ship, but they're very scheduled, or you have like
something that's like you know, Joe Rogan where he's just got like these high
profile guests or something. And we have guessed sometimes but largely what this is.
This is a bunch of fucking retards shooting the ship. And the whole
point is that you feel the whole point is like the podcast that I I
gravitated towards most growing up, which is not very many, but like the
few that caught my attention were the ones that felt like you were just kind
of listening in on like friends having an authentic fuck around conversation. And that's
what I want the show to be, you know what I mean. I
don't want it to be anything else. I don't want to like It's it's
kind of why the guest episodes are a little bit like they're very different,
like generally like or not. Like some of them are, some of them
aren't. But like, it's just it's difficult to have a guest in that
environment unless they're like very in you know, they're very up for it.
Jack was so up for it, and we've had some other guests who are
up for it too. Jake was great in person as well, Zach early
on, John. Yeah, we've had some people, but like it's just
like, yeah, it's just such a strange. I'm glad people like it,
and I'm glad the patron like continues to grow. It's it's kind of
wild that it does. I'm kind of shocked. I think it will only
be honest, I am, yeah, it will only improve once we get
once we get in person, once we're in person, it's gonna be like
a whole I'm so fun I'm really so excited about about that, Like I
can't even express like how pumped I am to have that. I have a
lot of anxiety, anticipation. Huh, excuse me and Rubin, I wasn't
sure if you said we should we should have Dave. We can make fun
of it, we can make fun of them A lot for having me on.
Guys of your gass husband, I'm super puys your husband, your gay
husband, your wife. I heard you stole two babies. I heard you
stole some babies. You fucking you, sick, fucking bastard. You stole
babies because you couldn't make it. You couldn't make any with your jail.
No I want to no no, no, no, no no no no
no I want I don't want to do that. I want to. I
don't want to do that. I want to grift with him. You want
to? I want to. I want to be like Dave. I want
to be Dave. What do you think big Gay is up to? What
do you think Big Day is trying to do well? Big Gay is being
gay, trying to make all young gay. Dude, You're dude, You're
onto something though, because it was like when when Tim Poole. When I
tried to, I was like, oh, he released that stupid song.
I'll write a song in three days and it'll be better. Uh. And
then he got it got relayed. He didn't realize that I was trying to,
you know, disrespect him. He didn't realize that. So what I
realized all those people over in that spear probably have no idea that, like,
we think they're fucking retarded and we can like reach out to them.
Hey man, it's been a long time and heard from me like six fucking
years. Come on the podcast. We'll discuss wo mobs and ship. Honestly,
that's kind of that would be fucking that would be We really have to
we really hold on. We really have to dedicate ourselves to that character.
Though, is the thing, like we really have to, like we can't
we can't let it slip. We can't let it slip. We have to
like play the part because they think about think about all the cliffs that would
be be taking from it. Oh man, every time it happens, every
time someone needs a moment, you gotta put your hand. We got one
second and you walk out the room real quick and you laugh. You gotta
ten seconds you have ten seconds to expel all of it in one big bird
big and then you walk back in, you sit down. Sorry, I
think I think it could be so good. Watson is aware? Is aware
here? Yeah? I think so. I think is Sargon is, But
I don't know if anybody else is. Really I think I think we like
I think we could we could get the quartering on. I think me and
a quarter have a wild argument about comic what we know what would hold on
because we could talk about like not even just a quartering, but like just
in general. I feel like we could be like, yeah, I'm sick
of these like woke. He's like the way they're force fitting all this ship
and it's like now we got black characters and movies and it's like do we
really need more black people? Like do we really need it? And then
we'll just like go to them into these totally. I think that would be
already like they already had this the idea of fucking with grifters is played,
just stroking them, just stroking their ego, making great points and ship and
then like they we only get like maybe two before they wanted to want to
fuck with us anymore. Yeah, it would be like a situation. It
would be a very Arragonda situation where like we could only really do it a
couple of times before before it got out. But I think it'd be worth
special guest, RFK Jr. And thanks for having me so man to sound
like that. How much your throw like the r junior? Please give me
the approxim amount of cock you swallowed the gear thing like that? Well,
it was approximately about two thousand pagenises before it broke me. So when JF
case had exploded, where were you exactly? I was pulling the trig A.
We get a confession out of Robert. We get an impossible confession on
our podcast. Podcasts will become legend and become American history. At that moment,
we interview the person that killed JFK by mistake one day, like there's
some simple chance it was what if you what if you found out that Robert
what if we found out that Robert Kennedy junior? What have we foun out
that Rober Kennedy junior? We found out that he's only thirty two, Like
he's thirty two oldest, Like he's old that's as old as he is,
Matt, Robert, I would junior. Why are you like that? That
would be what happened? What they do to you? Are you like solid
sneake? Oh wait wait, I forgot that we were recording the question or
not the question. We're finish, all right, Abby, mine mine,
mine, peen, peanuts, mine peanuts, horts painted black too? And
I say, a man, bud and I want to painted what wage?
Slay five eighty three A sad guy from Michigan? Can I get a dick
pic with your grace weatpants on and one without them? Can I also get
three picks of your dick in any position? Also the BPENI brothers inmporium a
black a son? Won't you come and thrust away? The straight donk Donkerson
installing a faulty neural link in Chris's head that plays thunder on repeat. You
gotta pay the troll sol to get in the boys whole gaate six shaggy voice
like zee ink Scoobe. Those were unarmed civilians. Row raggy oh, raggy
re he he re he he raggy re hee he re he raggy Oh oh,
I got it, I got it? Don't got them good? Are
getting cramp for a second from kicked it out though it's crazy move. I
moved my leg backwards and then something went pop and I was like, oh,
and I kicked my leg for it's crazy. I've never had a I've
never had a cramp in my life. Taken the back. So you know
what I've been doing. I've been doing. I've been doing kettlebell letters just
to try to get my lungs in my like my my like my lower back
stronger is doing like kettlebell stuff. And dude, that ship fucks you up
so bad, but you feel so good after a little while, better than
you know, what's better than that, what works better than that getting fucked
in the ass. It's true. Yeah, it's a good workout. I
hear, keep it, keep it. I think I think cramps are I
think cramps aren't real, and I think it's a big I think cramps aren't
real, and I think it's a setup by Big Cramp to convince everybody it's
actually not Big Cramp. It's big Water. They want to drink more water
than water. I'm big water. You don't need to drink water. Guy,
big water. I'm big water. He shows up and starts causing problem.
I've convinced you to pay for something that falls for free from the sky.
How do you like that from? It's true, he's stark. You
can't collect brainwater in some states. It's true. God damn big water,
big water, illegal action. So we could, guys, I have to
piss. Just call Lily in there, Jamie, Is that true? Yeah?
Whatever, Jamie, Jamie, Jamie, pull up that photo of that?
Jamie, pull up that photo that that that? Jamie? Can you
pull up a photo of delicious piss? Jammy? So many pictures, joke,
diligiously, jo No, not that one, not that one. Do
the one. It should be like third image should be the third image down
on the second page. Yeah, there we go. That's it, the
frosty one. There's a picture of some there's a picture of piss on the
sidewalk and him and Jami. Your salam you know, isn't break polaroid of
piss going crazy. Their mouths are watering, they're not blinking. Donating children
to underprivileged human traffickers. Mission failed. We'll get him next time. Could
you please? Could you guys make gorilla noises for me? I need them
from my D and D campaign. Ah help fuck and evil lesbian Home Alone
six Enter the Homo Verse. Chris is a secret piss drinker. A ship's
so nice, I had it twice. John Strickland Uncle Ben's Converted Rice Marks
eighteen eighty nine. Can't stop, Won't stop, jelk until my helmet pops.
The first starch of Key David presents pist drinkers versus the Yahoo you Who's
or the y who yaho's. The musical second shots of Key David featuring being
better than the first arch of Keith David pre Roz Blake eight nine six Logan
Paul has the ww has logan. Paul has been the w W Champion for
over niney days and it has defended it fucking once. Everybody gay, fuck
your buddy gay, Everybody fuck your buddy's ass. Fucking mandonit getting shot in
the face for mispronouncing that one African country Little Dishrag lost my job at Coles
because they caught me playing with the Manquins boobs. I last, you know
what I feel. Trash Texas Stato Salad one one seven three four six seven
three uh two one four six, Charlie three two seven eight nine seven seven
six Cox ramming everyone cops. Yeah, it's like someone's social security number,
Cox, Cox ramming everything around me. Cream in that bussy, come in
your face, all right, Sue Hulk, tak on my ass. Here
as Nicky Ziggy, the cream in your sister's pie. Wicked and I know
nine Jackson DuPont badly brave hugger, Derek duck Count the vegan necromancer, I
got consent, Etherian Prgerian hunter, Brogerian punter. I mean Melphus won the
angriest crowd, enjoying the view from the daily Plause on the sixth floor.
And rounding out our list is the notorious King of pap Hazard. Is this
the longest tangent? This? Is this the longest credits that we've had.
Probably we saw the credits at an hour something. I think, no way,
this one we got out of hand. This one really got out of
think I'll clock it, but this is definitely it's so long that I I
felt like it was never gonna end. Actually, yeah, I really I
don't think. I think. I think this is well, this purgatory.
Either do better or keep doing this, And that's what I think. Some
episodes, some episodes are gonna go along. Some episodes are gonna go short.
It'll be like a treat. It will be like a little bit like
sometimes. Look man, it'll be like a good little surprise for people.
It's like people love it. People. I do notice that people love it
when they're like, you know it's going to be a banger episode when the
credits start and there's an hour left. People love that ship. So,
so what I want to I want to make this one particular absurd. There's
so many as stuff that I don't even know. I was like, what
could I possibly name this episode? Like, there's so much ship happened that
I could That's right, Yeah, we'll just name it ud be it's legs
open, but someone's pool of water coming off. The name it. Name
it square scorting there, I mean that is actually clean. It doesn't actually
it doesn't have to be dirty. Naming it squore compilation. It'll be like
put the picture of the little turtle from Finding Nemo. Yes you're the name
squirt or something. That's his name is, oh gotchat turtle from Yeah,
the thumbnail the thumbnail could be the turtle that that baby turtle. Uh,
and then but it's like a million of him. It's like like a bunch
of him because it's a it's a squirt compilation. I don't know whatever,
we'll figure out squirrel with the cool shades. You remember that, I remember
from the Indigo League. Yeah, the squirrel squad. That's it. Damn
I forgot they have a squirting squad. I like that. That's pretty good.
The squirting squad, you goddamn, Oh my god. And Hathaway dead
and Hathway dead. It twelve, the she's twelve the age that died.
Yeah, would that be a butt situation? Like like Benjamin Button dead it
too? He lived a long life. One second before we go? Is
Benjamin Button the stupidest fucking concept for a movie of all time? Like when
you think about it, like, what do you actually think about it?
Is that not this? Like it sounds like something that was thought of on
this and you would immediately just be like, shut the fuck up. A
baby What if a baby was bored old and then it got as it got
older, it gets younger, and then it goes to a baby and dies,
Like what if that's how it works? Wouldn't that be crazy? You
literally would like there would be a pause of like, that's the stupidest thing
ever heard of and you would move on. But does did his get stronger
as he got older or did they get weaker as he got older? There's
a middle he was getting younger as he's getting older, So like, what
do you even mean by that question? You know what I mean? Like,
which what older are we talking about? As you grow older, touch
there and put your bone to get stronger. Right, that's not true.
My bones have been points they get stronger, calling man straight. But then
as you get but he's already so is he bored old frail bones or like,
so he's all fucked up? Or is it malleable kid bones that can
go into strong bone? Like at what point is he his most powerful at
twenty five or the middle seventy six? You know, look, here's yeah
forty eight, forty eight, forty eight, forty eight strong at shit strong?
Fuck you for Benjamin. Benjamin Button is like a movie that came out
too late, because I feel like it's like one of those movies like it's
an absurd premise, but I think it would have fit in the era of
like Edwards Scissorhands, you know what I mean, where it's like, yeah,
what if there was a guy with scissors for hands, and it's just
like, that's fucking stupid. Sure, let's do it him burn handling.
Benjamin Button would have been goaded. That would on the ceiling. It's like
that, I'm a baby, but I'm old. That's that's all movie.
It's just wacky. It's just like it'll be it'll be fun. Everyone's like
and it's it's Johnny Depp and Michael Keaton so together. And that's that's the
that's that's I'm leaving now. You got to continue this episode. I'm out
of here. This has been as here. We'll see you guys next time.
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