1 00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:35,479 Welcome to the Great Detectives of Old Time Radio from Boise Idahol. This is 2 00:00:35,520 --> 00:00:39,520 your host, Adam Graham. If you have a comment, email it to 3 00:00:39,600 --> 00:00:46,159 me Box thirteen at Great Detectives dot net. Follow us on Twitter at Radio 4 00:00:46,240 --> 00:00:52,200 Detectives, and check us out on Instagram, Instagram dot com, slash Great 5 00:00:52,240 --> 00:00:56,200 Detectives. Remember to be sure that you never miss an episode, You can 6 00:00:56,240 --> 00:01:02,960 subscribe to our podcast using your favorite podcast software including Stitcher, Overcast, Spotify, 7 00:01:03,200 --> 00:01:07,120 or the Amazon Music abbitt, Amazon dot com, slash ot Art Attractives. 8 00:01:07,359 --> 00:01:12,519 Well, today is our three thousand, nine hundred and fiftieth episode special. 9 00:01:12,719 --> 00:01:19,280 Yes, we're only fifty episodes away from four thousand, and we're going 10 00:01:19,359 --> 00:01:26,000 to celebrate with another Sam Spade a comedy episode, and this one comes from 11 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:30,519 the Burns and Allen program, which starred George Burns and his wife Gracie Allen. 12 00:01:30,799 --> 00:01:36,599 The original air date is February tenth, nineteen forty nine, and the 13 00:01:36,640 --> 00:01:42,120 title is Racy Sends Sam Spade to Jail Another cup of Maxwell House coffee. 14 00:01:42,159 --> 00:01:46,879 GigE, play me a cup, Grace youmail Max for House is always good 15 00:01:46,920 --> 00:01:53,159 to go live. That drop's good too. Yes, it's Maxwellhouse Coffee Times 16 00:01:53,239 --> 00:02:08,280 Darling George Burns with our special guest Howard Duff, who was the famous detective 17 00:02:08,360 --> 00:02:13,400 Sam Spade. Yours truly told me read Joseph Kerns, Elek Snowden, Harry 18 00:02:13,479 --> 00:02:16,840 Luban, the Maxwell House Orchestra, and Bill Goodwin. For America's Thursday night 19 00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:22,599 comedy enjoyment, It's George and Gracie. And for America's every day coffee drinking 20 00:02:22,680 --> 00:02:37,680 enjoyment in Maxwell House, always good to the last drop. Many people say 21 00:02:37,759 --> 00:02:42,120 that Gracie is responsible for George being where he is today, and that's certainly 22 00:02:42,159 --> 00:02:46,520 true. Gracie is also responsible for Sam Spade being where he is today. 23 00:02:46,159 --> 00:02:51,439 You see George and Sam Spade are both in jail. How did it happen? 24 00:02:51,639 --> 00:02:53,960 Well, let's listen as George as being questioned by a police lieutenant. 25 00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:59,240 All right, let's start at the top. Name, George Burns. Occupation. 26 00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:02,479 I'm married to Gracie Ellen. No, no, no, no. 27 00:03:02,520 --> 00:03:06,800 What do you do? What keeps you busy? I'm married to Gracie Ellen. 28 00:03:07,759 --> 00:03:10,120 Let me put it this way. What's your source of income? I'm 29 00:03:10,159 --> 00:03:16,039 married to Gracie Allen. All right, skipper, what's your age roximidly forty 30 00:03:16,080 --> 00:03:20,879 two. I'll come. You look older. I'm married to Gracie Allen. 31 00:03:23,400 --> 00:03:27,199 What's your address? When he's sixty North Camden. All right, Burns, 32 00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:30,599 And I suppose you tell me why you're in this jam. I'm married to 33 00:03:30,639 --> 00:03:35,000 Gracie Allen. You're in a rut a Spade, I'll come. You're in 34 00:03:35,039 --> 00:03:38,120 this jam. He's married to Gracie Allen. You know, Burns, you 35 00:03:38,159 --> 00:03:42,240 on this fake character accused of murder. I suppose you tell me the whole 36 00:03:42,240 --> 00:03:45,719 story, right from the start. Oh kay, Lieutenant. It all started 37 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:49,159 last Sunday night. I was sitting home listening to the radio with my wife. 38 00:03:49,840 --> 00:03:53,479 I'm married to Allen. That part, I know. Take it from 39 00:03:53,520 --> 00:03:57,039 there. Well, Gracie and I were listening to the Adventures of Sam Spade, 40 00:03:57,520 --> 00:04:00,879 the program we're just finished. All right, let's take a little ride 41 00:04:00,919 --> 00:04:05,439 down to headquarters, Nita. But I wouldn't murder mister Benson. I've been 42 00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:09,639 his butler for twenty years. Don't play innocent. I know you pulled this 43 00:04:09,759 --> 00:04:12,199 caper, and I've got enough evidence to put you right in the hot seat. 44 00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:15,240 But mister Speed, I didn't do it. To say that. Milakee 45 00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:17,800 for the warden. You were clever Jenkins, but not clever enough. I 46 00:04:17,879 --> 00:04:29,079 think I'll call this the careless butlert Caper. Why did you turn off the 47 00:04:29,160 --> 00:04:34,079 radio version? Dan said that the wrong man tonight. I'm positive the Jenkins 48 00:04:34,199 --> 00:04:42,839 butler wasn't guilty. An innocent man is going to get the hot plate hot 49 00:04:42,879 --> 00:04:46,040 seat, and don't worry, he'll only get it on the radio. Who 50 00:04:46,079 --> 00:04:50,560 cares where they put it when he sits down little burn Or. I got 51 00:04:50,560 --> 00:04:54,399 to talk to Dan state right away, Hony. Sam Spade is not a 52 00:04:54,399 --> 00:04:58,360 real detective, and I'll say he isn't any man who'd make an innocent butler 53 00:04:58,439 --> 00:05:02,079 sit on the hot plate. Say you'll get a hot seat, Sure will 54 00:05:02,120 --> 00:05:06,600 after he sits in a hot flighter. Look, here's what I mean. 55 00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:11,879 On his program, Sam Spade is a private detective, but in real life 56 00:05:11,879 --> 00:05:15,439 he's just an ordinary guy, just like on your program you're a knit wi 57 00:05:15,720 --> 00:05:26,839 But in real life that won't work anyway, Gracie, what you just trade 58 00:05:26,959 --> 00:05:30,759 was only your radio program. I know that the real crime happened last week. 59 00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:33,879 Every Sunday night Sam Stade broadcasts is the most thrilling case of the week. 60 00:05:33,959 --> 00:05:38,480 You still don't understand Sam Spade is just a character. I'll say he's 61 00:05:38,519 --> 00:05:42,279 a character. I'm making that poor innocent butlet sit in a hot place, 62 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:46,160 hot seat, Let me try to explain this once more. Sam Spade isn't 63 00:05:46,160 --> 00:05:49,920 even the fellow's real name. He's the brainchild of Dashel Hammet. Oh, 64 00:05:49,959 --> 00:05:55,279 oh you mean his real name is Sam Hemmet. No, his real name 65 00:05:55,360 --> 00:05:59,879 is Howard Duff. Then why is it? Why is his father's name Dashel? 66 00:06:01,199 --> 00:06:05,279 Look, Sam Spade doesn't have any actual father or mother. He came 67 00:06:05,319 --> 00:06:19,319 from DASHL Hammets typewriter. You so innocent, you know, I'll s you 68 00:06:19,399 --> 00:06:26,000 believe that old story about coming from undercbbage leads through what's the us? Okay, 69 00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:29,439 Sam Spade is a lauding detective and he's sending an innocent butler to the 70 00:06:29,480 --> 00:06:44,399 hot light. Good night, good night, Oh tennant. I didn't think 71 00:06:44,439 --> 00:06:46,480 anymore about it. I was tired. It was past my bedtime. What 72 00:06:46,639 --> 00:06:51,800 time was? It was after nine? So I went to bed, thinking 73 00:06:51,839 --> 00:06:56,079 Gracie would follow me. Instead, she followed Sam Spade. Oh what do 74 00:06:56,079 --> 00:07:00,279 you mean? Let me tell you about that part of Okay Spade? Well, 75 00:07:00,319 --> 00:07:03,120 I'd finished my regular Sunday night shot at the Broadcasting Studio, after which 76 00:07:03,120 --> 00:07:05,839 the actors lingered on for a little bull session. You know who stepped on 77 00:07:05,839 --> 00:07:09,240 whose lines? I want a bigger pot next week, and so forth. 78 00:07:09,279 --> 00:07:13,519 So it's about ten when I step out under the California night air, which 79 00:07:13,560 --> 00:07:17,360 is also about ten, but there's no snow, so I decided to walk 80 00:07:17,399 --> 00:07:21,240 home. I haven't taken two steps when this little lady grabs me by the 81 00:07:21,279 --> 00:07:26,279 sleeve and says, are you Sam Stade? Well, if I had known 82 00:07:26,360 --> 00:07:29,319 then what I know now, I would have thrown myself under the wheels of 83 00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:33,439 a passing sunset bus. But I'm a ham and I figured she's maybe a 84 00:07:33,439 --> 00:07:38,839 fan, so I answer in my best pathot in the playhouse boys, Yes, 85 00:07:38,920 --> 00:07:42,800 I'm Sam Stade. The butler didn't do it. Huh, you've got 86 00:07:42,800 --> 00:07:46,920 the wrong man. The butler didn't joke at Kipper Jerk that kipper jan Cat 87 00:07:46,959 --> 00:07:57,040 Papper. You mean that you've getting an innocent man to jail. No I 88 00:07:57,160 --> 00:08:00,199 did, Yes you did, lady. I think you're a little mixed up 89 00:08:00,240 --> 00:08:03,560 about me and just an actor. On CBS, that's what everybody said. 90 00:08:05,360 --> 00:08:09,800 Look a little lady, I'm tired. It's been a tough day. I'll 91 00:08:09,839 --> 00:08:13,959 see you on h just spend it at dance sake. I heard you arrests 92 00:08:13,079 --> 00:08:16,839 Butler. You've got to let him go free. You wouldn't give me a 93 00:08:16,920 --> 00:08:20,879 reb would you anything to free that Butler? Which we do you want? 94 00:08:22,720 --> 00:08:26,120 I'll tell you what. Why don't you write me a letter? But a 95 00:08:26,199 --> 00:08:28,839 dull prience? Don't use anything sharp. I'll do better than that. I'll 96 00:08:28,839 --> 00:08:31,799 come to your office. Where is it? I haven't gotten an office, 97 00:08:33,639 --> 00:08:37,200 plain cage? Huh? All right, I'll come to your house. Where's 98 00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:39,240 back? Three? Two? One? I don't know. I'm not talking. 99 00:08:39,279 --> 00:08:50,399 I want to get some sleep to night along? Where are you following 100 00:08:50,399 --> 00:08:56,080 me? What do you want? Got a cigarette? Sure? Yeah? 101 00:08:56,279 --> 00:09:01,720 Got a match? Sure, light it for you? Okay, I don't 102 00:09:01,720 --> 00:09:05,559 smoke. Then why did you ask me for a cigarette? Oh? I 103 00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:09,600 thought i'd better have it in cake? Somebody asked me for one? I 104 00:09:09,759 --> 00:09:15,600 see would you as a cigarette? No? Thanks? Well? Good now? 105 00:09:16,159 --> 00:09:28,600 Good night? Okay, okay, Now what's the times? Yeah it's 106 00:09:28,639 --> 00:09:33,279 exactly ten ten? Thanks? Thanks? I met it's ten minutes after ten. 107 00:09:33,559 --> 00:09:37,320 You're wrong my watch, that's goodteen after ten. You've got to watch? 108 00:09:37,919 --> 00:09:43,559 Then? Why did you ask me the time one cigarette? No? 109 00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:52,960 Oh, good now, good night. Look, ladies stop following me. 110 00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:58,360 Oh it's you again. Yeah, fancy meeting me here? Can I give 111 00:09:58,399 --> 00:10:03,240 you the slipt three? I couldn't extuck the thing I talk. I'm a 112 00:10:03,279 --> 00:10:07,679 strange man. All right? What do you want this time? Got a 113 00:10:07,759 --> 00:10:13,399 roadmap? A roadmap? Are you lost? May I make a suggestion? 114 00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:30,159 Get lost? Well? Now, good night. Well, I've had enough 115 00:10:30,159 --> 00:10:31,320 of this little lady. You've seen the end of me. Yeah, it's 116 00:10:31,440 --> 00:10:39,799 you block. That's time I lose you. Hey, taxi, taxi, 117 00:10:41,159 --> 00:10:52,399 Let's get out of here, Cabby, but fast. It's my house, 118 00:10:52,480 --> 00:10:56,840 Cabby flop. It was real driving, buddy, keep the change? Can 119 00:10:56,879 --> 00:11:09,679 I? Oh no? Oh no? How did you get here in the 120 00:11:09,679 --> 00:11:15,600 back of that tad? Who are you anyway? Oh no, I'm too 121 00:11:15,639 --> 00:11:18,360 smart to tell you who I am? If I did you complain to my 122 00:11:18,399 --> 00:11:24,320 husband George Byrne? Oh so you're Gracie Allen? How did you find out? 123 00:11:24,799 --> 00:11:28,159 You forget? I'm a detective. And now I know what the National 124 00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:31,759 Safety Council means when they say don't be a Gracie. Oh never mind, 125 00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:35,399 Dad, are you going to let the butler go Look, Gracie, there's 126 00:11:35,399 --> 00:11:37,480 really no butler in present, and I'm not really sam Space. Oh now, 127 00:11:37,519 --> 00:11:45,120 don't give me that story about your mother being a typewriter. You're not 128 00:11:45,240 --> 00:11:48,720 talking to a child. I'm older than our Look, okay, Gracie, 129 00:11:48,720 --> 00:11:50,240 I see there's no use are you with a smart girl like you. I'll 130 00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:54,159 see that the butler gets out. I'll get on the best mouthpiece of time. 131 00:11:54,320 --> 00:11:58,960 Get him out first, six and teeth later. Okay, Okay, 132 00:11:58,120 --> 00:12:09,879 good night, Well lieutenant, I thought that that would be the end of 133 00:12:09,919 --> 00:12:13,559 the episode, but it was. Brother. You haven't heard anything yet. 134 00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:16,519 The next time, Wait a minute, mister Burns. Before I listen anymore 135 00:12:16,559 --> 00:12:20,320 of this story, I'll have to send out for some aspiring. Yeah, 136 00:12:20,799 --> 00:12:24,279 have some of mine? Hey, how come you walk around with your pockets 137 00:12:24,320 --> 00:13:07,600 full of aspiring? I'm married to Gracie Allen. Yes, it strike up 138 00:13:07,600 --> 00:13:09,639 the band. The glorious music of George Gershwin. You know, you just 139 00:13:09,679 --> 00:13:13,799 can't mistake those melodies, those typical harmony of the wonderful Gershwin rhythms. And 140 00:13:13,919 --> 00:13:18,360 it's all these things, all the separate musical elements skillfully combined that make the 141 00:13:18,440 --> 00:13:22,200 music of George Gershwin so immortal. Listen a moment to one of his most 142 00:13:22,240 --> 00:13:26,440 famous compositions. It was heard for the first time just twenty five years ago 143 00:13:26,519 --> 00:13:31,039 tonight. Let's see if you can recognize it when we play just the mellow 144 00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:43,679 harmonade. With that, we'll blend this counter melody for richness, and now 145 00:13:43,720 --> 00:13:50,320 to add that vigorous Gershwin rhythm. Finally will wound out this great score as 146 00:13:50,360 --> 00:14:03,000 Gershwin intended you to hear and enjoy it by adding his full bodied melodade. 147 00:14:03,840 --> 00:14:07,559 Yes, the famous Rhapsody in Blue even more popular today than when it was 148 00:14:07,600 --> 00:14:11,559 first played twenty five years ago tonight. Like all great composers, George Gershwin 149 00:14:11,679 --> 00:14:16,320 knew well that great music requires not one, but many fine musical parts, 150 00:14:16,399 --> 00:14:22,480 all skillfully blended into one harmonious score. And friends, it takes the same 151 00:14:22,559 --> 00:14:28,159 skill in blending to bring you great coffee, famous Maxwell House coffee. It's 152 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:33,200 flavor rich, satisfying, good to the last drop flavor that's made Maxwell House 153 00:14:33,519 --> 00:14:37,279 America's favorite brand of coffee. And to create the sufferb flavor, our Maxwell 154 00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:43,279 House experts combine not one but many choice coffees from the Fertile Highlands of Latin 155 00:14:43,279 --> 00:14:52,559 America. First they select premium grades of Manazal's coffees. For melanis to these 156 00:14:52,559 --> 00:15:00,480 coffees, fine metalinds are added for richness, but famous Maxwell House play must 157 00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:03,240 be more than melo and rich, so other choice coffees are added for bigger 158 00:15:07,360 --> 00:15:18,320 and then book among us coffees contribute their fine, full body. This perfectly 159 00:15:18,360 --> 00:15:22,399 balanced Maxwell House blend is then radiant roasted to flavor perfection and brought to you 160 00:15:22,639 --> 00:15:28,480 vacuum packed and roaster price. And because you folks on the West Coast really 161 00:15:28,519 --> 00:15:31,440 know and enjoy coffee and it's best, Maxwell House is blended and roasted for 162 00:15:31,519 --> 00:15:37,080 you right here on the West Coast. Satisfy your critical tape, So tomorrow 163 00:15:37,120 --> 00:15:41,799 discover all the extra flavor that's yours in every couple of America's favorite brand of 164 00:15:41,799 --> 00:16:03,639 coffee, Famous Maxwell House, always good to the last drop. And now 165 00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:07,919 back to the city jail where George and Sam Spade are trying to explain how 166 00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:11,639 Gracie put them there. Let's see if I've got this straight so far, 167 00:16:11,759 --> 00:16:15,840 Burns, your wife listened to Sam spade program for he was really sending an 168 00:16:15,879 --> 00:16:18,720 innocent butler to the chair and started hounding him. That's right, Lieutenant, 169 00:16:18,960 --> 00:16:22,120 What did you think, Spade? I didn't know what the fake lieutenant. 170 00:16:22,120 --> 00:16:26,159 The surveys tell me I have ten million odd listeners, but I didn't think 171 00:16:26,159 --> 00:16:30,679 any of them with that odd ill anyway to get rid of her? You 172 00:16:30,759 --> 00:16:33,960 told her that you'd free the butler. Yeah, but that didn't satisfied Gracey's 173 00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:36,879 She didn't wanted to see the guy. That's when Spade came to me from 174 00:16:36,919 --> 00:16:38,799 Hope. He asked me to make Gracie leave him alone. How would you 175 00:16:38,840 --> 00:16:42,759 say? I told him to ask me something easy, like getting Westbrook Pegler 176 00:16:42,840 --> 00:16:52,360 to dance with Eleanor Roosevelt. Mister Burns, why have you put up with 177 00:16:52,399 --> 00:16:56,799 a wife like that? I'm too old to go back to Gus Edwards. 178 00:16:59,399 --> 00:17:03,000 Besides which, I happened to love her. Well, so what did you 179 00:17:03,039 --> 00:17:04,599 two decide to do? Well, there was only one thing we could do. 180 00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:07,319 That was they got the actor who played the butler on my program I 181 00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:11,279 Love Gracie Sam, which we did. Yeah, and that's when we really 182 00:17:11,279 --> 00:17:15,240 got into trouble. I guess what happened. Okay, Spade was giving the 183 00:17:15,279 --> 00:17:19,799 guy is finally remember Claudia Jenkins, the butler and I have set you free. 184 00:17:21,039 --> 00:17:23,799 Don't worry. I'll have Missus Burns crying like a baby in radio. 185 00:17:23,880 --> 00:17:30,119 They don't call me the mail mar Perkins for nothing. I'll come on. 186 00:17:30,240 --> 00:17:33,440 Gracey's in the next room. Honey, here's Sam Spade. Yes, the 187 00:17:33,599 --> 00:17:37,400 spies and I have freed the butler. Here he is. How do you 188 00:17:37,440 --> 00:17:41,039 do madam? It is the butler. I recognize that voice. Oh, 189 00:17:41,079 --> 00:17:45,599 I'm so happy for you, Jenkins. What would you do now that you're 190 00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:48,119 free? I shall return to the home of my youth. Ready, your 191 00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:53,400 youth? I had reference to my birthplace, madam, dear old England, 192 00:17:53,720 --> 00:17:57,319 I shall go back there to regain my hill. Really, yes, America 193 00:17:57,440 --> 00:18:00,680 is nice, but I'll take liver. You don't have to go to England 194 00:18:00,720 --> 00:18:07,000 for Liverpools. They made right here, I asked. That's Carter's little Liverpools. 195 00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:12,599 I take the Liverpool is the name of a city. Yes, Now, 196 00:18:12,799 --> 00:18:18,319 thank Missus Burns for getting out of jail and unscrew disappear. Madam, 197 00:18:18,559 --> 00:18:23,720 Your beneficent intervention has terminated the most injurious and humiliating incarceration. You'll never know 198 00:18:23,839 --> 00:18:29,559 what that means. Why don't unless you stop in the word goodbye? Jenkins 199 00:18:29,759 --> 00:18:32,960 Phill. Well, all I go to a new and better life. Oh 200 00:18:33,039 --> 00:18:37,440 goodbye, re write me from Kidney Creek, Liverpool. Well, I was 201 00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:45,519 in the right neighborhood. Goodbye. Well takes care of that. Ah, 202 00:18:45,559 --> 00:18:48,279 George here said it. I'll be running along too, goodbye, Grace. 203 00:18:48,680 --> 00:18:52,319 Just a minute now. Look, if the bupper didn't murder mister Benson, 204 00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:56,799 who did. You proved that his wife and daughter didn't do it, and 205 00:18:56,880 --> 00:19:00,960 there was only one other person in the scene, so he must be the 206 00:19:00,039 --> 00:19:08,039 murderer. You confess they you united, mister Benson, But I have no 207 00:19:08,279 --> 00:19:14,880 motive and you did it with something else. Look, Gracie, you mind 208 00:19:14,920 --> 00:19:18,079 a stick, judge. I'm gonna give him the third degree lipstick, but 209 00:19:18,279 --> 00:19:21,799 I want to look nice when he shines that bright light in my face. 210 00:19:22,599 --> 00:19:26,480 You're supposed to shine it in his face. Oh oh well, and give 211 00:19:26,559 --> 00:19:40,279 him the lipstick I've kept out of this madhouse. Goodbye Well. Lieutenant Strade 212 00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:45,559 ran out of that house like like like he was seeing a ghost, which 213 00:19:45,680 --> 00:19:48,000 was true because from then on Gracie started on harnting him, trying to make 214 00:19:48,079 --> 00:19:52,839 him confess. Yeah, she found out that my radio sponsor was Wildlood. 215 00:19:52,880 --> 00:19:55,880 Creamer. Also, she disguised herself with a big hat in the veil and 216 00:19:55,960 --> 00:20:02,240 knocked at my door. Damn Faith, Yes, how do you do. 217 00:20:02,559 --> 00:20:10,039 My name is wild Rude. Perhaps you know my husband Willie Premoil. My 218 00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:14,279 full name is Missus Wildrood cream Oil. I'm the wife of your sponsor. 219 00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:18,519 Now look, I understand you murdered the mister Benson. Now that's strictly forbidden 220 00:20:18,519 --> 00:20:23,079 in your contract. Missus cream Oil, you look like Gracie Allen to me. 221 00:20:23,720 --> 00:20:30,200 Flattery will get you no players. If you like to confess, perhaps 222 00:20:30,240 --> 00:20:33,880 we can get you off with life imprisonment. When you come out, you 223 00:20:33,920 --> 00:20:37,480 can take over your program again. Gracie, I did not murder mister Benson. 224 00:20:37,720 --> 00:20:42,920 Go away. But the next day she was back, this time of 225 00:20:44,039 --> 00:20:51,160 another disguise. Damn Faith. Yes, I'm from Western Union. I have 226 00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:55,160 a telegram here from President Truman. Why I'll read it to you, dear 227 00:20:55,279 --> 00:21:03,519 dam confess signed Harry any answer, scram beat it, go away. That's 228 00:21:03,559 --> 00:21:10,200 no way to talk to the president. But the third day topped everything. 229 00:21:10,240 --> 00:21:17,759 She posed as a private detective fan Faith. Yes, I'm fairly shoveled, 230 00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:22,480 Sam. We're in the same racket. Pale and I want to help your 231 00:21:22,480 --> 00:21:26,680 body, So why don't you confess? Now you're a private eye? Also, 232 00:21:26,039 --> 00:21:36,359 no throat. I put everything into my work. Now confess job. 233 00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:38,880 So your murdered dancer to what I've been mixed up with? A few? 234 00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:42,119 Keeper? Or is the keeper in you're a case? It's keepers? Now 235 00:21:42,200 --> 00:21:49,759 go away? Well, lieutenant, that's when Spade came to see me again, 236 00:21:51,319 --> 00:21:53,400 looking much older. Yeah, we hit on a brilliant scheme. When 237 00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:56,599 you decided that I should confess the murder, then George would pretend to take 238 00:21:56,599 --> 00:22:00,519 me to the city Hall of surrender and Gracie would forget the whole thing. 239 00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:03,839 But Gracie did something we didn't count on was that while I was going to 240 00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:07,519 pick up Spade, she called the police. Oh, yes, that's why 241 00:22:07,599 --> 00:22:10,480 I come into the picture. She called me, I suppose you tell us 242 00:22:10,519 --> 00:22:12,079 what happened? Then? Well, when I got to the house, she 243 00:22:12,160 --> 00:22:17,960 said, there's a desperate criminal on his way here to confess a murder. 244 00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:19,559 As soon as he confesses, you can grab it. Don't worry, lady, 245 00:22:19,599 --> 00:22:25,480 I'll are you waiting the next room? Maybe armed? Oh he is 246 00:22:25,519 --> 00:22:34,400 the one hanging from each shoulder you call it? Oh, where is everybody? 247 00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:37,559 Over my mind. What's your name, Bill Goodwin? What did you 248 00:22:37,559 --> 00:22:44,799 do with the body? I took her home? Why did you do that? 249 00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:48,200 I dumped her out? She was dead? Huh, I was sure, 250 00:22:48,240 --> 00:22:52,880 that's why I took her home. You've done a pretty terrible thing, 251 00:22:52,960 --> 00:23:00,279 young man. Tomorrow off senders some flowers. You're a real killer. What's 252 00:23:00,319 --> 00:23:10,119 your everything? You're good tonight? I will not for are you her father? 253 00:23:11,599 --> 00:23:14,440 Well, in that case, I'll tell you that. Another fellow and 254 00:23:14,519 --> 00:23:15,680 I double dated. We met the girls, and the far of us went 255 00:23:15,680 --> 00:23:19,680 into a restaurant for dinner. I ordered four cups to Maxwell House coffee, 256 00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:22,480 and what well, I told the way to bring the other people some too. 257 00:23:23,119 --> 00:23:26,519 I wanted them to taste the rich, mellow goodness of Maxwell House. 258 00:23:26,759 --> 00:23:30,759 It's America's favorite coffee. You know, yes, I know what happened then, 259 00:23:30,039 --> 00:23:33,000 Well, that's when the girl and I got into a fight. Ah 260 00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:38,359 what about she cut me drinking her Maxwell House coffee. But you've had four 261 00:23:38,400 --> 00:23:41,799 cups. Well, when you taste that good to the last drop flavor, 262 00:23:41,839 --> 00:23:44,599 you just don't know when to stop. You know. Maxwell House is a 263 00:23:44,599 --> 00:23:48,240 blend of the finest Latin American coffees. Radiant roasted to the peak of flavor 264 00:23:48,319 --> 00:23:52,920 perfection. The n office in to be confessed that good. He confessed everything. 265 00:23:52,920 --> 00:23:56,279 Missus burns. He got mixed up with the girl, and now he's 266 00:23:56,319 --> 00:23:59,119 headed for the chair. You're nuts when I get mixed up with a girl 267 00:23:59,119 --> 00:24:06,440 I had for the divan. I'm in the electric chair. You killed the 268 00:24:06,519 --> 00:24:11,119 girl? Are you kidding? All I killed was five cups of Maxwell House 269 00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:14,960 coffee? Yes, officer, this is the wrong man. Sam Spade is 270 00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:18,880 the one you want to a ribber. Sam Spade is in trouble. Oh 271 00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:22,960 gee, I was gonna hire him to find someone for me. Girl about 272 00:24:22,039 --> 00:24:26,799 five feet two, red hair, green eyes, terrific figure, drives a 273 00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:30,519 Cadillac convertible. Oh when did you last fear? Who's seen her? I 274 00:24:30,559 --> 00:24:42,960 want Stade to find anyone like that. Well, there won't be any mistake 275 00:24:44,039 --> 00:24:47,200 this time, Officer. He comes My husband up the walk with a real 276 00:24:47,279 --> 00:24:49,880 murderer. Yeah, anyone can tell that guy's a criminal. We're gonna low 277 00:24:51,000 --> 00:24:56,440 forehead. That's my husband that this time. I want to hear the confession 278 00:24:56,440 --> 00:25:00,119 before I make the pinch. I'll just suck into this closet. Oh, 279 00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:03,319 mister Spade, I hate to think of him sitting in the electric chair with 280 00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:08,039 those long legs. To'd be so uncomfortable. Well, here he is, 281 00:25:08,039 --> 00:25:11,359 grace ready to confess. Yes, I can hide the truth no longer. 282 00:25:11,599 --> 00:25:15,000 I killed Benson. Why did you do it, mister Sade. That man 283 00:25:15,119 --> 00:25:18,920 murdered my mother, ruined my father, tortured my sister, and robbed my 284 00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:23,799 brother. Oh then there was nothing personal. No, I just didn't like 285 00:25:23,920 --> 00:25:29,279 him. How did it happen? Benson was standing in a bar see. 286 00:25:29,480 --> 00:25:32,160 I walked up to him. Let him have two slugs, and he fell 287 00:25:32,160 --> 00:25:36,599 to the floor, couldn't hold his leg a huh. Let him have two 288 00:25:36,640 --> 00:25:40,079 slugs from a crystol. Now keep quiet and let the man confess. Yes, 289 00:25:40,400 --> 00:25:42,400 I'll never get my chancey. I shot him down in cold blood, 290 00:25:42,400 --> 00:25:45,799 and as he lay on the floor, I pulled the trigger again and again 291 00:25:45,920 --> 00:25:48,839 and again. When the gun was empty, I stood over his body and 292 00:25:48,960 --> 00:25:52,400 laughed like a theme that I am. I should have been locked up for 293 00:25:52,480 --> 00:25:57,599 twenty years, thirty years, I'll like that, forty. Who are you? 294 00:25:57,759 --> 00:26:00,799 I'm rigging from homicide. I called him over to hear your confession. 295 00:26:00,960 --> 00:26:03,240 Okay, come on, Spade, officer, wait a minute, let me 296 00:26:03,279 --> 00:26:07,079 explain. Mister Spayden, I cooked this whole thing up together. Oh, 297 00:26:07,119 --> 00:26:11,240 an accomplice. I'll take you a long time. Wait a minute. I've 298 00:26:11,279 --> 00:26:15,039 never done anything wrong in my life, of course not. I need my 299 00:26:15,119 --> 00:26:18,279 husbands, the man who married me. All right, So I did one 300 00:26:18,319 --> 00:26:30,000 thing wrong. Come on you too, well, lieutenant. That's the whole 301 00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:33,160 story. My apologies, pology. You're both free to go. Thanks. 302 00:26:33,559 --> 00:26:36,960 Come on, Sam, let's get out of here. You said it. 303 00:26:37,079 --> 00:26:40,079 Oh, by the way, mister Burne, your wife's waiting outside, Gracie. 304 00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:45,680 So long, George, I'm standing in jail, so long. Oh, 305 00:26:45,759 --> 00:26:48,279 hello Darling, Hello Gracie. Let's go home. Oh I can't, 306 00:26:48,279 --> 00:26:52,960 sweetheart, I've got something important to do. Hey, you've got that big 307 00:26:52,000 --> 00:26:55,559 hat and a veil on again. Where are you gonna? Well? While 308 00:26:55,599 --> 00:26:57,880 you were in jail, I heard Eli Queen on the radio and he arrested 309 00:26:57,920 --> 00:27:18,920 the wrong name. Oh you're up, star, Join us again next Thursday 310 00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:21,519 one. We'll all be back. George Burns, Gracie, Allen, Bill 311 00:27:21,559 --> 00:27:23,160 good One, Harry Luban and the Maxwell House Orchestra, and yours truly, 312 00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:27,240 Toby Read And now here are our stars, oh, Gracie. Next week 313 00:27:27,279 --> 00:27:32,960 we're gonna have two guests, does mister and missus James Mason, James Nathan 314 00:27:33,519 --> 00:27:37,240 An wonderful English actors are so mean to ruck with women. That's the man. 315 00:27:38,079 --> 00:27:42,279 See he not hit me? Oh but would you hear he wouldn't? 316 00:27:42,359 --> 00:27:47,319 Damn you should You'd show him if he hit me, you'd hit missus. 317 00:27:47,400 --> 00:28:04,160 Night, ladies and gentlemen, let's all remember to help the National Safety Council 318 00:28:04,240 --> 00:28:10,319 in their campaign to cut down the terrible toll of home accidents. Be safe, 319 00:28:11,039 --> 00:28:18,200 be careful, don't be a gracie good easy way. Do you like 320 00:28:18,400 --> 00:28:26,359 good things the easy way, then get instant Maxwell House coffeesh so good, 321 00:28:26,599 --> 00:28:30,279 true coffee, flavor and pregnance because instant Maxwell House is not a so called 322 00:28:30,319 --> 00:28:37,599 coffee product. It's all pure Maxwell House coffee in instant form, so easy. 323 00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:41,839 Instant Maxwell House means great coffee instantly in your cuff, no fuss, 324 00:28:41,960 --> 00:28:45,960 no muss, no bother Today. Try instant Maxwell House instantly good to the 325 00:28:47,160 --> 00:29:03,720 last drop. Howard Duffel. Soon, Missaying, I'll start off the Universal 326 00:29:03,759 --> 00:29:07,759 International Picture Red Canyon until next Thursday, when our guests will be mister and 327 00:29:07,839 --> 00:29:11,960 missus James Mason. Good night and good Luck from the makers of Maxwell House, 328 00:29:12,319 --> 00:29:18,599 America's Favorite Branda Coming Always Good to the Last Drop, and George Burns 329 00:29:18,599 --> 00:29:40,000 and Gracie Allen. Joe's written by Paul Henning and Keith Pollard. Welcome back. 330 00:29:40,119 --> 00:29:44,880 Well a hilarious episode. There were some great bits in it. I 331 00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:52,200 thought it was hilarious. And she asked Sam Spade for the cigarette and the 332 00:29:52,359 --> 00:29:56,319 matches and then said she didn't smoke. I mean that it was just a 333 00:29:56,480 --> 00:30:03,160 great bit. Perfect timing and Racie Allen in top form. There are so 334 00:30:03,319 --> 00:30:07,480 many great comic performers in old time radio, but I don't think any can 335 00:30:07,559 --> 00:30:12,920 make me laugh as much as Gracie Allen. She just had such superb timing 336 00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:18,960 delivery. It's just something else to hear her work. And the riding was 337 00:30:18,079 --> 00:30:25,680 good. I love Sam Spade Slash Howard dust line. That survey said that 338 00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:30,599 he had ten million odd listeners, but he didn't think any work white this 339 00:30:30,799 --> 00:30:36,039 odd and the writer, Paul Henning went on to a very successful career in 340 00:30:36,200 --> 00:30:41,480 television, most notably as the creator and main rider for the Beverly Hillbillies. 341 00:30:41,920 --> 00:30:48,440 Of course, you also got a few of the running gags and tropes of 342 00:30:48,599 --> 00:30:53,839 the programs such as George being a bit of a week lean who depended on 343 00:30:55,079 --> 00:30:59,480 Gracie for his livelihood, and Bill Goodwin being a bit of a wolf. 344 00:31:00,039 --> 00:31:04,960 Of course there I don't think there was a better pitchman in old time radio 345 00:31:06,240 --> 00:31:14,720 than Bill Goodwin for being able to work his pitches into the plot of effectively 346 00:31:14,839 --> 00:31:18,319 a sitcom. It's a bit different with a variety program where they take a 347 00:31:18,519 --> 00:31:23,519 break and you know, you just kind of get a commercial to be its 348 00:31:23,599 --> 00:31:29,599 own thing, but being able to deliver it as worked into the plot. 349 00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:34,079 And he did this not only for Maxwellhouse Coffee, but he did it for 350 00:31:34,240 --> 00:31:40,640 Swan Soap for many years, and Larry do it for a carnation evaporated milk. 351 00:31:40,880 --> 00:31:44,759 And he'd go back to Bob Hope and would do it on the Bob 352 00:31:44,839 --> 00:31:48,599 Hope Show for Jello, an incredibly talented guy. Now, one reference that 353 00:31:49,279 --> 00:31:56,519 went over my head was when George said that Sam Spage had asked him to 354 00:31:56,599 --> 00:32:02,119 do something easy like getting Eleanor Roosevelt and Westbrook Pegler to dance, And of 355 00:32:02,240 --> 00:32:09,200 course the listener in the twenty first century asked who was Westbrook Pegler. Westbrook 356 00:32:09,400 --> 00:32:16,440 Pegler was a Pulitzer prize winning columnist and a critic of the New Deal. 357 00:32:16,799 --> 00:32:22,839 His criticism was at such a level that FDR asked the FBI to investigate, 358 00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:30,160 and they found no evidence of sedition. But apparently his feud with Eleanor Roosevelt 359 00:32:30,400 --> 00:32:37,400 had not really cooled even four years after she'd left the White House following the 360 00:32:37,480 --> 00:32:40,759 death of her husband. Well that's what that joke was about. Well, 361 00:32:40,839 --> 00:32:45,000 now it's time to thank our Patreon supporter of the day. Thank you to 362 00:32:45,279 --> 00:32:52,200 Bruce, Patreon supporter since April of twenty nineteen, currently supported the program at 363 00:32:52,279 --> 00:32:57,079 the rookie level of two dollars or more per month. Thanks so much for 364 00:32:57,160 --> 00:33:00,960 your support, Bruce. And that will do it for today. We'll be 365 00:33:00,119 --> 00:33:07,759 back next Sunday to begin our series of Encore performances, and this Tuesday, 366 00:33:07,880 --> 00:33:13,680 be sure and listen to Doctor Tam Detective. But join us back here tomorrow 367 00:33:13,759 --> 00:33:17,839 for the Adventures of Sam Spade where what exactly is my assignment? Mister Brighton? 368 00:33:19,039 --> 00:33:22,359 I want you to be present at this miserable party tonight and pretend to 369 00:33:22,440 --> 00:33:24,519 have a good time. Why didn't you hire an actor? This is a 370 00:33:24,720 --> 00:33:30,319 new kind of masquerade ball even I have a unique problem here a Halloween party 371 00:33:30,400 --> 00:33:34,759 combined with a party announcing the engagement of a socially prominent young woman. Well, 372 00:33:34,880 --> 00:33:37,119 naturally the press will be on hand they always are that my parties. 373 00:33:37,559 --> 00:33:40,960 But I doubt if any of the invited gifts will show up. That's where 374 00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:45,200 you come in. You're one of the uninvited. I hope you'll be with 375 00:33:45,319 --> 00:33:47,920 us then. In the meantime, do you send your comments to Box thirteen 376 00:33:49,480 --> 00:33:52,839 at Great Detectives dot net, Follow us on Twitter at Radio Detectives, and 377 00:33:53,200 --> 00:33:59,519 check us out on Instagram, Instagram, dot com, slash Great Detectives from 378 00:34:00,039 --> 00:34:04,200 wecy idahole. This is your host, Adam Graham signing off.