WEBVTT

1
00:00:00.640 --> 00:00:08.320
Hello, and welcome back to John. Hello John, Hello, Hello bye

2
00:00:08.359 --> 00:00:29.879
for three Hi, and welcome back
to on the Latch. You're here with

3
00:00:29.960 --> 00:00:34.880
me at guy pusy. It's me
again, Nika riem and it's me JP

4
00:00:35.039 --> 00:00:38.159
Longlands. Say that again, John, you're so quiet. It's me JP

5
00:00:38.320 --> 00:00:41.759
long Lands say it with some gusto. Come on, No, guys,

6
00:00:41.759 --> 00:00:45.960
it's been a long day. What
day? It's Sunday? Exactly fine?

7
00:00:46.039 --> 00:00:49.439
What have you been doing? Absolutely
nothing? To be honest, So it's

8
00:00:49.439 --> 00:00:51.759
been a long day, be natally
doing absolutely no. I'm hungover, I

9
00:00:51.759 --> 00:00:55.840
as per usual. I had a
big boozy day yesterday. How has everyone's

10
00:00:55.920 --> 00:01:02.719
week's been. Well, I've been
sick of work. Hay fever literally attacked

11
00:01:02.799 --> 00:01:04.840
me like a bitch. Then you
get to go off work for haveviver.

12
00:01:04.920 --> 00:01:08.719
That's pretty great. Oh no,
it wasn't just one just sneezing about.

13
00:01:08.799 --> 00:01:12.079
Plus then I got a fever,
and then I got a cough and I'm

14
00:01:12.120 --> 00:01:17.599
currently still dealing with the cough.
So apologies if I just start coughing very

15
00:01:17.680 --> 00:01:21.000
randomly during this episode, But im
you better, like if you want a

16
00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:25.239
doctor's note, you could be like
you could be like, listen to my

17
00:01:25.319 --> 00:01:32.519
podcast and you'll see I don't fire
me. I'm really sick. What else?

18
00:01:32.640 --> 00:01:34.079
I actually haven't seen you in a
while. We're Oh, you missed

19
00:01:34.120 --> 00:01:40.719
me, haven't you. I didn't
say that. I said I haven't seen

20
00:01:40.760 --> 00:01:44.280
you in a while. But how
was life being? Generally that guy speak

21
00:01:44.319 --> 00:01:46.400
for him. Yeah, no,
I do miss you. You're a good

22
00:01:46.400 --> 00:01:51.120
boy. No, thank you,
everything's been okay. I went to this

23
00:01:51.159 --> 00:01:57.280
really great event on Friday called astro
Matrix. Was astro Mix. That's a

24
00:01:57.280 --> 00:02:00.079
really bad program if I don't know
the name, but sounds great, always

25
00:02:00.120 --> 00:02:05.920
fantastic. What was it? So
it was just a get together based on

26
00:02:06.079 --> 00:02:12.400
astrology and star signs. So that
was about maybe fifty sixty of us in

27
00:02:12.400 --> 00:02:17.360
the room. Um split together in
like our elemental star signed so as I'm

28
00:02:17.400 --> 00:02:20.599
a Libra, I'm an air sign. I thought you were a Libra.

29
00:02:23.479 --> 00:02:28.080
I have no idea. He mentioned
he was a Libra earlier, so we

30
00:02:28.199 --> 00:02:31.680
will split into our elements. So
I was at the air signs. If

31
00:02:31.719 --> 00:02:35.439
you're vig or, you're with the
Earth signs, et cetera, et cetera.

32
00:02:35.879 --> 00:02:38.680
And then we just played games.
We had a debate, We had

33
00:02:38.719 --> 00:02:42.840
some drinks. Got to me,
some really really really really really great people.

34
00:02:43.639 --> 00:02:47.000
And yeah, that's I managed to
get energy for that to go to

35
00:02:47.080 --> 00:02:53.560
on Friday. Not to go to
work though, but yeah, if you're

36
00:02:53.560 --> 00:02:55.439
going to run this episode to your
employer, I'm not doing that. Stop

37
00:02:55.479 --> 00:03:01.000
it like a minute ago. If
you are Raheems and player, don't fire

38
00:03:01.080 --> 00:03:06.879
him. I'm cute. But yeah, I've had I've had a really,

39
00:03:06.919 --> 00:03:08.560
really really a good weekend. And
before I came here, I watched Devils

40
00:03:08.560 --> 00:03:12.599
Were product fully for the first time, because every time I watched it before,

41
00:03:12.960 --> 00:03:15.759
I end up falling a sloop.
Oh, it is a classic.

42
00:03:16.199 --> 00:03:23.000
It is a classic. Are you
like Big inter astrology? Yeah? Random

43
00:03:23.039 --> 00:03:28.599
fact? What it's cancer season right, Yes, these emotional people up down

44
00:03:28.639 --> 00:03:30.719
the place. Yeah, everyone's going
to fall that little bit more emotional about

45
00:03:30.759 --> 00:03:36.639
everything. Big Maid. We should
should be Season four should be like,

46
00:03:37.520 --> 00:03:40.479
oh, we could get twelve different
people with twelve different star signs here,

47
00:03:40.680 --> 00:03:45.120
all eligible men, and we can
see which ones we want to sleep with

48
00:03:45.479 --> 00:03:47.159
and see if they're match it on
the chart. Yeah, on a chart.

49
00:03:49.800 --> 00:03:51.879
That would be great. God,
that's such a good idea. Season

50
00:03:51.960 --> 00:03:55.240
four we won't do that because I
haven't got time to match find people.

51
00:03:55.560 --> 00:04:00.879
But I'm an Aquarius. That is
interesting to anyone's your week being what are

52
00:04:00.919 --> 00:04:03.400
you? Before we move on,
I'm Satia, of course you are.

53
00:04:08.439 --> 00:04:12.599
Yeah, I'm proper Satarius, big
sattarius energy. My week has been fine,

54
00:04:13.000 --> 00:04:16.879
like not as wild as last week
in terms of like family drums listened

55
00:04:16.879 --> 00:04:19.600
to last week's episode one, Oh, I must listen to last week's said,

56
00:04:20.120 --> 00:04:26.199
um, I've set a date to
meet my long lost cousin for dinner.

57
00:04:26.480 --> 00:04:30.079
This is fascinating, so I set
a date to meet him. Don't

58
00:04:30.120 --> 00:04:36.399
know this has become dilemma of episode
one where you accidentally fun. I have

59
00:04:36.439 --> 00:04:42.360
a dilemma. My my, my
best pal message me when it was all

60
00:04:42.560 --> 00:04:44.759
like starting to kick off, and
he was like I think you should just

61
00:04:44.800 --> 00:04:47.120
fuck him and like a pillow talk
be like, oh, by the way,

62
00:04:48.000 --> 00:04:53.680
we need NaN's ashes. I was
like, no, you're actually vile

63
00:04:54.040 --> 00:04:59.000
anyway, you should do that.
Beyond that, Jesus Christ, I had

64
00:05:00.480 --> 00:05:03.000
Beyond that. I had a pretty
like rough back end of the week,

65
00:05:03.199 --> 00:05:08.839
like I was homophobically abused at work
for the second time in quite quick succession.

66
00:05:09.079 --> 00:05:15.160
Yes you were so that was a
bit shit, And then yeah he

67
00:05:15.319 --> 00:05:17.040
was a proper asser. Do you
want to talk about it more, Well,

68
00:05:17.240 --> 00:05:20.000
well, well, there's only so
much you can say about a man

69
00:05:20.120 --> 00:05:23.959
yelling, go suck a bunch of
dicks in your face? In't there?

70
00:05:23.959 --> 00:05:26.199
And I was like, mate,
trust me, I would rather doing that.

71
00:05:26.519 --> 00:05:30.680
Yeah, here talking to you.
And then yeah, I think we've

72
00:05:30.720 --> 00:05:32.079
brought it to the police that we've
got a crime for Dunbar. I've got

73
00:05:32.079 --> 00:05:34.160
a picture of his face, and
I'm just like, should I tweet it

74
00:05:34.199 --> 00:05:38.720
and try to ruin his life or
not? That's the thing these days.

75
00:05:38.720 --> 00:05:41.800
Do you tweet a picture then you
eventually go to their workplace and you just

76
00:05:41.839 --> 00:05:45.800
shut down his life temporarily. I
definitely see the appeal of that, but

77
00:05:45.920 --> 00:05:48.879
I'm also glad that you went the
sort of legal route, yeah, because

78
00:05:48.920 --> 00:05:51.279
I think it is the safest bet
I think. You know, But now

79
00:05:51.319 --> 00:05:54.279
he's walked away down the street.
They're never going to find him. You

80
00:05:54.319 --> 00:05:56.959
know. There's loads of fucking boarding
white men in the city. Who are

81
00:05:57.079 --> 00:06:00.759
you know what? I hate it. I hate arrogance of not all men,

82
00:06:00.959 --> 00:06:04.000
the arrogance of most men. He'll
come in for a point next week,

83
00:06:04.040 --> 00:06:06.160
Oh absolutely, you know what I
mean, Like, he doesn't think

84
00:06:06.199 --> 00:06:10.839
he's done shit. We wouldn't remember
to be honest, and that's it,

85
00:06:10.839 --> 00:06:14.879
Like people don't stupid stuff drunk.
But you know, yeah, most of

86
00:06:14.959 --> 00:06:16.439
it's like you know, like,
oh, like spilling him, spilling your

87
00:06:16.519 --> 00:06:20.439
KFC. Yeah, well no,
I know exactly exactly. Not being homophobic

88
00:06:20.480 --> 00:06:25.439
to people. True, true,
I guess I kind of see it.

89
00:06:25.439 --> 00:06:27.560
It shouldn't be, but it's kind
of part and parts of my job,

90
00:06:27.560 --> 00:06:30.079
I guess to deal with drunken idiots, Like that's what I get paid to

91
00:06:30.120 --> 00:06:34.040
do. It's part and parcel of
your job to deal with drunken idiots.

92
00:06:34.079 --> 00:06:38.959
People get drunk, people say things, but like, it's not part and

93
00:06:39.040 --> 00:06:43.120
parcelswho I do know that it's not
like I agree, I see, but

94
00:06:43.160 --> 00:06:45.920
it's healthy to kind of see it
like that because otherwise how would you go

95
00:06:46.120 --> 00:06:48.800
towards that? Exactly? I've been
that like appartually qute weekend. It's been

96
00:06:48.839 --> 00:06:54.120
quite boozy. But hanging out with
date boy and stuff and date boy is

97
00:06:54.160 --> 00:06:58.199
that what we call him? That's
so when is date boy becoming boyfriend?

98
00:06:58.959 --> 00:07:05.920
TBC? TBC? He does sound
nice though, he's lovely. How are

99
00:07:05.920 --> 00:07:11.600
you guy? I'm fine. I've
had a very busy week. I wasn't

100
00:07:11.639 --> 00:07:14.639
here last weekend. I apologize.
I'm sure you all got over it.

101
00:07:14.959 --> 00:07:16.399
I did read No, I did
read out your message to listeners on the

102
00:07:16.399 --> 00:07:19.040
podcast. You didn't I did.
What was my message? I can't remember.

103
00:07:19.920 --> 00:07:23.639
Let them know that I'm going off
being flown out to a five for

104
00:07:23.839 --> 00:07:27.720
hotel. I didn't mean to.
I didn't actually mean you to read it

105
00:07:27.720 --> 00:07:31.000
out. People know where you are, guys. I was in a Barcelona

106
00:07:31.279 --> 00:07:35.879
I went. I went to the
motorbike Grand Prix. How very mass.

107
00:07:36.199 --> 00:07:41.000
It was so mashed. It was
really fun. It was really last minute.

108
00:07:41.439 --> 00:07:45.959
So you love the killers came from. I wore all the merch like

109
00:07:46.000 --> 00:07:48.240
super Mario Brothers or something. It's
like read a red baseball care bread polo

110
00:07:48.319 --> 00:07:51.879
shirt. Mario Brothers is a straight
thing. John, No, no,

111
00:07:51.720 --> 00:07:58.199
no, I just you just I
don't remember them wearing merch war red.

112
00:08:00.160 --> 00:08:03.800
I had a lot of fun,
got laid. That was fun. Um.

113
00:08:03.959 --> 00:08:07.240
I mean, I've never I've never
got lady abroad before. Isn't that

114
00:08:07.279 --> 00:08:11.120
insane? Yeah? Honestly, yeah, I'm a thirty one year old man

115
00:08:11.199 --> 00:08:15.240
who had never ever had sex outside
of his country. Was it different?

116
00:08:16.079 --> 00:08:18.399
Of course, it wasn't different.
It was exactly the same. But I

117
00:08:18.439 --> 00:08:22.800
had a view of the kind of
a cathedral from the room off from the

118
00:08:22.800 --> 00:08:26.920
street, from the window, from
the window of a five star hotel I

119
00:08:26.959 --> 00:08:30.160
was staying. But how did you
meet him? I'm not going to go

120
00:08:30.160 --> 00:08:35.879
into too much detail. Oh oh
it makes a change. But also any

121
00:08:35.919 --> 00:08:37.919
poor you have a glass of wine? Yeah, I mean I would love

122
00:08:37.919 --> 00:08:41.200
another glass of wine. I've only
had one today. What was really interesting

123
00:08:41.759 --> 00:08:46.639
is that I met another fan.
I met this lovely guy who might even

124
00:08:46.679 --> 00:08:50.919
be listening, who who was a
fellow journalist was also flown there for the

125
00:08:50.039 --> 00:08:52.159
thing, and he was like are
you guy? And I was like yeah,

126
00:08:52.159 --> 00:08:56.240
and he was like from on the
latch and I was like yes,

127
00:08:56.919 --> 00:09:03.759
celebrity stairs. And also Josh Willisy, who was sadly not here today.

128
00:09:03.399 --> 00:09:07.720
Um was on a flight to la
If people were business class, in business

129
00:09:07.759 --> 00:09:13.279
class, don't drop that. He's
tryna, he's tryna be me. I've

130
00:09:13.320 --> 00:09:16.679
never found business class actually, um, but yeah, he was in firing

131
00:09:16.679 --> 00:09:22.720
a business class and the lovely steward
in a high Virgin steward who listened to

132
00:09:22.799 --> 00:09:26.399
us. Yeah, hello steward Fromvirgin
Atlantic who listens to us. I won't

133
00:09:26.480 --> 00:09:28.440
name you, just in case,
but I tell you on Instagram, now

134
00:09:28.440 --> 00:09:33.600
do you? I don't know his
name, and he recognized him drawing him

135
00:09:33.600 --> 00:09:37.320
with glass of champagne, and Josh
must have been like, hey to please,

136
00:09:37.440 --> 00:09:41.600
and he must have been like you
for black gay Frasier. Yes that's

137
00:09:41.679 --> 00:09:46.480
me. Yeah, it's him and
Ben and I, who again is not

138
00:09:46.559 --> 00:09:50.799
here at not again Ben, Um, you're just like listing people like they're

139
00:09:50.840 --> 00:09:54.960
total strangers. People are aware they're
not here. Yeah, but you know

140
00:09:56.759 --> 00:09:58.799
David's not here either. David's not
here either, but I haven't had any

141
00:10:00.039 --> 00:10:03.919
action with him. But Ben and
I were very kindly invited to the Pride

142
00:10:03.080 --> 00:10:07.399
Pride London Garla dinner this week Delivery
who hosted us, thank you very much,

143
00:10:07.799 --> 00:10:11.240
and we had a lovely, lovely
time. But we were really really

144
00:10:11.240 --> 00:10:15.600
pleasantly surprised by how many people just
knew who we were from a podcast Ben

145
00:10:15.639 --> 00:10:22.639
from BBC Hill Ben and his lovely
boyfriend Tom lovely lovely, lovely people and

146
00:10:22.679 --> 00:10:24.200
anyway, just people were just like, oh wait you got in Ben from

147
00:10:24.279 --> 00:10:28.759
It was so nice. And also
someone else was like, the thing's okay

148
00:10:28.759 --> 00:10:33.000
with you and Ben and I was
like, yes, everything is. It's

149
00:10:33.039 --> 00:10:37.159
really really weird. The first thing
was when this guy from Mike Hoopler Hello,

150
00:10:37.879 --> 00:10:41.399
m was like is that thing all
right? And I was like what

151
00:10:41.759 --> 00:10:48.480
and he was like, retention invested
in this? Apparently there's tension not sexual.

152
00:10:48.960 --> 00:10:50.919
Actually, forget that. People listen
to what I know. I forget

153
00:10:50.919 --> 00:10:54.399
that too when I say certain things. That's why I caught myself earlier.

154
00:10:56.320 --> 00:10:58.799
Um, but yeah, I just
wanted to I wanted to mention that just

155
00:10:58.840 --> 00:11:03.600
because I think it's really lovely that
people recognize us and know who we are

156
00:11:03.639 --> 00:11:07.559
and maybe don't enjoy it. It's
an oral, it's anor deal, but

157
00:11:07.600 --> 00:11:11.360
they're loving it. So what we're
going to do this week is talk about

158
00:11:11.559 --> 00:11:16.159
relationship deal breakers, and we're going
to sort of set up scenarios and I'm

159
00:11:16.159 --> 00:11:20.919
going to give them, give these, give them to you. I'm going

160
00:11:20.960 --> 00:11:22.519
to give it to here. Oh
yes please. What I want you to

161
00:11:22.519 --> 00:11:30.840
do is imagine that all of these
scenarios follow you dating someone for let's say

162
00:11:31.320 --> 00:11:35.559
three dates. Three dates. Okay, so imagine you have been dating someone

163
00:11:35.559 --> 00:11:41.639
for three dates, you like them, Yeah, you've slept together let's say

164
00:11:41.679 --> 00:11:45.440
once three times? Well yeah for
me, for me it will be like

165
00:11:45.480 --> 00:11:52.320
eight. But let's say at the
very least three dates one fuck okay,

166
00:11:52.600 --> 00:11:58.440
and you are meeting date four and
they come in and they say x okay,

167
00:11:58.559 --> 00:12:01.080
and that it's the kind of basis
of the things. So I want

168
00:12:01.159 --> 00:12:03.799
people to I want you all to
give me your answers, and I want

169
00:12:03.799 --> 00:12:09.279
people at home to think about what
they would do too. So do we

170
00:12:09.279 --> 00:12:13.080
should give him a name? Date
boy? No, not date boy,

171
00:12:13.600 --> 00:12:22.519
that's too close to the bone.
Yeah, okay, Jordan, Yeah,

172
00:12:22.679 --> 00:12:26.559
bathing in the river Jordan. So
Jordan comes in to Date four, which

173
00:12:26.720 --> 00:12:31.159
is just a drink in a pub, and he sits down and he says

174
00:12:33.200 --> 00:12:39.279
that he has an only fans account
or what would you say? Can I

175
00:12:39.360 --> 00:12:43.559
have free access? Do you know
what? That also went across my mind.

176
00:12:45.639 --> 00:12:50.399
But also, you know what,
I think that I'm kind of desensitized

177
00:12:50.440 --> 00:12:56.799
to only fans and kind of freak
Twitter that's gone about. And I love

178
00:12:56.840 --> 00:13:01.440
freak Twitter. It's a very interesting
sectional Twitter, believe me. Yeah.

179
00:13:01.120 --> 00:13:07.240
But I think if someone came up
to me and they'd actually someone in my

180
00:13:07.279 --> 00:13:15.320
Instagram's um came to me and just
said, um, just this really random

181
00:13:15.320 --> 00:13:18.120
conversation. Okay, Hi, who
are you? Blah blah, blah,

182
00:13:18.159 --> 00:13:22.039
and then he said, oh,
I thought you would have recognized me.

183
00:13:22.080 --> 00:13:24.600
And I said, know why?
He said, oh, because I've been

184
00:13:24.600 --> 00:13:31.200
in a porn film I just completed. I was just, oh, okay,

185
00:13:31.000 --> 00:13:35.679
I'm great that you're sexually freezing.
Oh a lot of people have judgment

186
00:13:35.679 --> 00:13:39.440
and I said, well, we
all watched porn. Yeah, so I'm

187
00:13:39.440 --> 00:13:43.320
sure people have actually got their load
off because of youth. It's not really

188
00:13:43.320 --> 00:13:46.399
a big deal. So I think
someone told me they haven't only fans account

189
00:13:46.879 --> 00:13:52.600
I'd probably ask them, are we're
eventually going to make films together? And

190
00:13:52.759 --> 00:14:00.360
do I get a cut? Because
because if we're going to continue, you're

191
00:14:00.360 --> 00:14:01.519
going to say that I haven't only
fans. I want you to be a

192
00:14:01.559 --> 00:14:05.720
part of it. If it starts
to get serious, this is this,

193
00:14:05.919 --> 00:14:09.279
Yeah, your only fans will coome
our fans. So if we're going to

194
00:14:09.399 --> 00:14:15.279
make films, salent entrepreneur, I
want to cut. If you did that,

195
00:14:15.360 --> 00:14:16.320
and if they said yes, I
would like to be part of that

196
00:14:16.320 --> 00:14:20.840
eventually, would you do it?
Like would you would you have your face

197
00:14:20.879 --> 00:14:28.600
out? If he if he has
his face out? Oh, that's s

198
00:14:28.720 --> 00:14:31.879
a very good question. That's a
ski mask or something I was or like

199
00:14:31.879 --> 00:14:39.919
one of those Mexican wrestler outfits.
Yeah, like that's what I would do

200
00:14:39.960 --> 00:14:41.440
if you ever watch, if you
ever watching only fans, and as a

201
00:14:41.440 --> 00:14:46.720
man in a Mexican probably it's probably
me. Do you know? Being anonymous

202
00:14:46.919 --> 00:14:50.399
is hot, so I'd probably weren't. What about you, John, I

203
00:14:50.440 --> 00:14:56.399
don't think I would care. Um, I would love to have only fans

204
00:14:56.600 --> 00:15:00.440
myself. If I thought just one
person would pay for my news. I'm

205
00:15:00.440 --> 00:15:01.440
sure someone would pay for your news. If you want to pay for my

206
00:15:01.519 --> 00:15:07.360
news. Your mother sounds very supportive. I'm sure there's a no. I

207
00:15:07.399 --> 00:15:11.039
don't. I don't. I definitely
wouldn't give a shit if they'd know only

208
00:15:11.120 --> 00:15:13.039
fans. Um, as long as
they had some fans on it, right,

209
00:15:13.159 --> 00:15:20.519
Yeah, yeah, there's nothing worse
than a tragic or like that's good,

210
00:15:20.600 --> 00:15:22.759
that's fine. Yeah, I would
my I would maybe if they were

211
00:15:22.799 --> 00:15:26.039
like, oh yeah, and I
invite like guess people all the time.

212
00:15:26.120 --> 00:15:28.120
I think this is because this is
my segue. Yeah, I would be

213
00:15:28.159 --> 00:15:33.080
fine with the only fans, Absolutely
fine. I would want a free subscription.

214
00:15:33.159 --> 00:15:37.879
I think it's a really valid and
really very smart way to make money.

215
00:15:39.200 --> 00:15:41.440
Like you're you're doing it anyway,
You've just been slinging my nose around

216
00:15:41.480 --> 00:15:46.679
for free for years. I think
I see complete value and complete validity in

217
00:15:46.879 --> 00:15:50.120
only fans accounts, and I'm like, do it. But my only question

218
00:15:50.200 --> 00:15:54.799
would be like, do you what
you're There are different kinds of only fans

219
00:15:54.000 --> 00:15:56.519
are you? Are you? Are
you just by yourself? Or are you

220
00:15:56.720 --> 00:16:00.559
regularly inviting other people to make shows
for you? If we get together,

221
00:16:00.720 --> 00:16:03.600
then that part that will be my
thing. I'd be like ghost, like,

222
00:16:03.639 --> 00:16:07.000
you can go solo. But I'd
be like, if I mean long

223
00:16:07.080 --> 00:16:08.759
term, if we're going to be
in a relationship together, I mean,

224
00:16:08.840 --> 00:16:12.039
you know some people have. I'm
just not much of an open relationship person.

225
00:16:12.159 --> 00:16:17.320
No mean either, And so I
would be like the conversation would differ

226
00:16:17.639 --> 00:16:21.360
the moment they were like, oh
yeah, and tomorrow I'm having two guys

227
00:16:21.360 --> 00:16:25.120
over and I going to dpe me
law, I'd be like, there's terms

228
00:16:25.159 --> 00:16:29.519
and conditions. Yeahs, terms and
conditions apply. Yeah, that's interesting.

229
00:16:29.559 --> 00:16:32.720
So we actually all agree. Yeah, I'm boring. I know this episode

230
00:16:32.720 --> 00:16:36.159
of the time. Did you remember
we got in season one or two that

231
00:16:36.200 --> 00:16:40.480
we always agree? Yeah. People
messaged in they were like, oh so

232
00:16:41.399 --> 00:16:45.000
boring. Fight seven man just getting
together and now they're bringing yeah, exactly,

233
00:16:45.000 --> 00:16:48.360
and now they're like, what's the
beef of you and Bend trying to

234
00:16:48.399 --> 00:16:52.799
start up? So bored of us
agreeing with one another? Okay? Man?

235
00:16:52.840 --> 00:16:57.440
And so if if we've all sort
of have you ever subscribed to anybody's

236
00:16:57.480 --> 00:17:02.360
only fan? No, I'm I'm
inji as fuck. They're all there.

237
00:17:02.360 --> 00:17:07.240
If you just you can google the
money. No no, no, no,

238
00:17:07.240 --> 00:17:08.759
no no, no, I'm joking. I'm but I was. I

239
00:17:08.839 --> 00:17:11.519
was at this bar on Friday,
which is this piano bar. But I

240
00:17:11.599 --> 00:17:15.400
go toe to sing sometimes, which
is really fun. I really like it.

241
00:17:15.960 --> 00:17:18.839
Um, sorry, what so there's
a guy's coming up on an album

242
00:17:18.880 --> 00:17:22.119
soon? No no, but like
it's it's like a paraoke bar. Okay,

243
00:17:22.160 --> 00:17:25.839
but it's a man on a piano
and west End musical songs and you

244
00:17:25.880 --> 00:17:27.920
pick a song and you go up
with a microphone. Sounds amazing. Yeah,

245
00:17:27.920 --> 00:17:30.599
it's a ness a squeat every other
Friday. It's really really fun.

246
00:17:30.759 --> 00:17:34.160
What would you sing from West End
show? Yeah? Oh my god,

247
00:17:34.200 --> 00:17:37.759
havn't seen waitress? I would I
sank she used to be mine? On

248
00:17:37.799 --> 00:17:40.200
Friday? Do you yeah? Fuck? Oh? Okay, that would be

249
00:17:40.279 --> 00:17:42.359
I would butcher it it went really
well, did you Yeah? Oh my

250
00:17:42.400 --> 00:17:47.319
god. So anyway, do go
everyone, It's really fun. It's cold

251
00:17:47.319 --> 00:17:48.960
show off bar. We should go, should go because actually the next one

252
00:17:49.039 --> 00:17:52.839
it's on a Sunday evening. It's
changed for one week only wee could go

253
00:17:52.880 --> 00:17:57.279
after recording wonderful whins that let's make
two weeks today. Anyway, yeah,

254
00:17:57.640 --> 00:18:00.720
sorry everyone about any way, there
was this one guy sitting a couple of

255
00:18:00.720 --> 00:18:04.440
tables away from me, and I
was probably the only man in the room

256
00:18:04.480 --> 00:18:07.839
who had who knew that I'd seen
him in Pawn Okay, okay, and

257
00:18:08.039 --> 00:18:14.799
I just wanted to just like go
tell him in some way like not in

258
00:18:14.799 --> 00:18:15.920
a sort of like not in a
sort of like. I didn't want to

259
00:18:15.920 --> 00:18:21.039
try and pull him just because I've
seen you in Pawn and therefore you I've

260
00:18:21.039 --> 00:18:22.880
seen your dick already, so you
may as well show me now, but

261
00:18:22.960 --> 00:18:27.400
like you kind of want to be
like, I support your choices. You

262
00:18:27.480 --> 00:18:33.720
have a beautiful ass um Also,
it would be weird because I don't know

263
00:18:33.759 --> 00:18:36.200
his real name. I assumed he
had stage names. I almost wanted to

264
00:18:36.240 --> 00:18:38.079
be like, are you called X? And you'd be like no, but

265
00:18:38.119 --> 00:18:42.960
I know what you're getting it.
But anyway, so we've if we if

266
00:18:42.960 --> 00:18:45.680
the kind of deal breaker for you
is not having the only fans, but

267
00:18:45.839 --> 00:18:51.000
having people that they have on your
only fans, is being a sex worker

268
00:18:51.079 --> 00:18:56.440
deal breaker for you an ongoing sex
worker, Yeah, I think so.

269
00:18:56.680 --> 00:19:00.079
Just be too jealous. I think
that's the thing for me too. I

270
00:19:00.119 --> 00:19:03.279
would be jealous that it's a perfect
like, oh yeah, I think we

271
00:19:03.359 --> 00:19:07.559
are in agreement that sex workers usually
date each other, even people in the

272
00:19:07.599 --> 00:19:11.759
porn industry usually date. A lot
of porn workers definitely date each other.

273
00:19:11.839 --> 00:19:15.720
They understand that. I remember I
was watching this porn documentary months ago.

274
00:19:15.200 --> 00:19:21.960
Was it just porn? I was
watching a porn documentary, a documentary the

275
00:19:21.960 --> 00:19:29.000
whole day um, and the woman
was just like, yeah, I usually

276
00:19:29.079 --> 00:19:32.480
date guys for like two and three
months, and then when it starts to

277
00:19:32.519 --> 00:19:34.920
get serious, or when I actually
tell them my profession. In the beginning,

278
00:19:34.960 --> 00:19:37.039
they say they're fine with it.
But as we get seriously, they

279
00:19:37.039 --> 00:19:38.599
say no, I want you to
stop porn, and they're just like,

280
00:19:38.640 --> 00:19:41.839
well, I enjoy what I do. And it lost for another maybe a

281
00:19:41.960 --> 00:19:45.519
month or so when they breakup,
right, Yeah, I think that's yea.

282
00:19:45.599 --> 00:19:48.480
I think i'd be too jealous.
Yeah, I would be too jealous.

283
00:19:49.559 --> 00:19:52.519
But yeah, I wouldn't even say
I'm a jealous person, but I

284
00:19:52.519 --> 00:19:55.359
would. I would be. I
would be uncomfortable in at the moment,

285
00:19:55.519 --> 00:20:00.799
just like I'm you're making these films
and I'm watching someone else enjoy you too

286
00:20:00.799 --> 00:20:03.519
often, and then I'm going to
enjoy you later on. It just doesn't

287
00:20:03.599 --> 00:20:07.920
feel like where's the intimacy in it, Like, yeah, you're doing that

288
00:20:07.000 --> 00:20:11.000
for work now, So I yeah, I couldn't. I couldn't do that.

289
00:20:11.200 --> 00:20:14.759
I couldn't. I think I could
get over that aspect of it,

290
00:20:15.039 --> 00:20:19.880
and I could even get over the
practicality of it because obviously, like it's

291
00:20:19.920 --> 00:20:27.960
not normal working hours, sex work. So yeah, I'm I didn't know

292
00:20:27.960 --> 00:20:33.599
what I expected you to say,
just like, you know, there are

293
00:20:33.680 --> 00:20:37.160
going to be like evening, there's
going to be working in the evening,

294
00:20:37.240 --> 00:20:38.599
et cetera. And I'd be like, do you want to grab McDonald's and

295
00:20:38.640 --> 00:20:41.640
like watch Netflix? And it's like
I'd like to have my evenings with my

296
00:20:41.680 --> 00:20:45.960
partner, but I'm sure they film
porn during the day. Yeah, But

297
00:20:45.000 --> 00:20:48.119
like I don't now I'm now I'm
going Now I'm referring back to the sex

298
00:20:48.200 --> 00:20:52.440
work where they are meeting a client
on a Friday evening, and I'd be

299
00:20:52.440 --> 00:20:53.400
like, I want to watch TV, and they'd be like, I have

300
00:20:53.440 --> 00:20:56.839
to go make money, and I'd
be like, I want to watch TV.

301
00:20:56.880 --> 00:21:00.319
E U. So yeah, So
again we're agreeing too much. I

302
00:21:00.319 --> 00:21:03.079
don't like this. We all agree
it to legitimate practice, but we'd all

303
00:21:03.079 --> 00:21:07.799
be too jealous. Yes, yes, okay, fine, let's try and

304
00:21:07.839 --> 00:21:12.359
find something that we disagree on.
Okay, So person what's his name?

305
00:21:12.400 --> 00:21:18.680
George Jordan comes in. You've had
sex with him once, well eight times

306
00:21:18.920 --> 00:21:22.720
whatever, always at your house.
You say maybe we should go back to

307
00:21:22.759 --> 00:21:25.160
yours this evening, and he says, sure, no problem, I'll just

308
00:21:25.200 --> 00:21:29.799
text my parents to make sure that
that's fine. And he lives with his

309
00:21:29.839 --> 00:21:33.480
parents. I got that. Yeah, you just you were looking at me

310
00:21:33.559 --> 00:21:37.559
like you were like, I could
you could you enter a long term relationship

311
00:21:37.599 --> 00:21:41.319
with someone who lived with his parents? Well, eventually, the idea is

312
00:21:41.319 --> 00:21:48.400
that you would live out in theory. In theory, but I don't think

313
00:21:48.400 --> 00:21:52.759
it would bother I don't think it'll
wove me either. Really, it would

314
00:21:52.799 --> 00:21:56.799
really bother me. It's like,
well, I think that it would bother

315
00:21:56.839 --> 00:22:00.279
me for two reasons. The first
reason, it's just purely practice called a

316
00:22:00.359 --> 00:22:03.839
little bit awkward. You go over, you meet them over breakfast, They're

317
00:22:03.880 --> 00:22:06.160
like, oh, how nice to
meet you. That's uncomfortable, but I

318
00:22:06.160 --> 00:22:10.319
can get over that. My question
would be, you know, I'm I'm

319
00:22:10.440 --> 00:22:15.759
I'm thirty one. So people that
I'm dating are like generally twenty seven plus.

320
00:22:17.160 --> 00:22:19.079
Yeah, and so I think that
would be for me. It would

321
00:22:19.079 --> 00:22:22.240
be like, why is it twenty
seven plus year old man living with his

322
00:22:22.319 --> 00:22:25.960
parents? Yeah? Okay, but
that's a that's an entirely different Like if

323
00:22:25.960 --> 00:22:27.880
there was some like freak reason that
they were living with their parents. You

324
00:22:27.920 --> 00:22:32.079
said they've never moved out. Yeah, you don't know somebody else's circumstances.

325
00:22:32.079 --> 00:22:33.519
It could be a perfectly digit reason. Yeah, of course I would,

326
00:22:34.000 --> 00:22:37.319
And I would ask I wouldn't I
didn't. You just said you were just

327
00:22:37.359 --> 00:22:40.400
gonna I wouldn't. I know of
But I did not. I did not.

328
00:22:40.640 --> 00:22:42.240
I didn't mean I would just like
flounce out and be like bye,

329
00:22:42.759 --> 00:22:45.640
like obviously if I would be like, oh out of interest what and they

330
00:22:45.640 --> 00:22:48.400
were like, oh, well,
you know, I fell on hard times

331
00:22:48.440 --> 00:22:51.440
and at that all good. But
like if it was one of his situations

332
00:22:51.440 --> 00:22:53.480
where like, why would I move
out? Like I get free laundry and

333
00:22:53.519 --> 00:22:56.880
I get free fo Yeah, I'd
be like, well, that's not going

334
00:22:56.960 --> 00:22:59.960
to happen, is it. No? But think of like the extra money

335
00:23:00.000 --> 00:23:03.400
they'd have to go and do fun
stuff or to buy a house or to

336
00:23:03.400 --> 00:23:04.680
buy a I mean, if they're
my age now, having lived with their

337
00:23:04.720 --> 00:23:10.960
parents ever since graduation, that's like
they might just about having like thirteen years

338
00:23:11.200 --> 00:23:12.960
of not paying rent. Yeah,
don't tell me you ain't got a mortgage,

339
00:23:14.000 --> 00:23:18.400
don't see. Also think like their
parents might make you like dinner.

340
00:23:18.400 --> 00:23:21.240
I think in the free food you
could have want I'm here for there with

341
00:23:21.279 --> 00:23:25.000
his mother. Oh, mums love
me. Mums love me, but like

342
00:23:25.079 --> 00:23:26.839
don't not like I mean, I
don't remember mums. I don't. I've

343
00:23:26.839 --> 00:23:30.119
never met the mum of someone I
was sleeping with that that she knew of,

344
00:23:33.160 --> 00:23:36.640
No, generally, And I don't
think I've ever met a boyfriend's parents,

345
00:23:36.839 --> 00:23:41.920
if you no, I've only ever
had two boyfriends really and they were

346
00:23:41.039 --> 00:23:48.880
orphans. No. Um, I
only fuck orphans to save drama. No

347
00:23:48.039 --> 00:23:52.200
um No, but no, I
just always they always break up with me

348
00:23:52.240 --> 00:23:56.519
just before I'm just before I meet
the parents. What do you think that

349
00:23:56.559 --> 00:23:59.079
a good length of time to meet
the parents if he's not three days in

350
00:23:59.279 --> 00:24:02.680
to me, it's like a six
month thing to me. To me,

351
00:24:02.759 --> 00:24:06.559
you should definitely he should definitely have
told you he loves you before you meet

352
00:24:06.599 --> 00:24:10.960
the parents. Yeah, no,
i'd agree with that. I don't know

353
00:24:11.000 --> 00:24:15.720
why simply just when you're ready,
because it could be ready a year.

354
00:24:15.839 --> 00:24:21.160
But I agree with, oh yeah, it's obviously wait longer if you need

355
00:24:21.160 --> 00:24:26.119
to make sure he wants to he
said that he loves you. Yeah,

356
00:24:26.160 --> 00:24:30.000
I just I just definitely wouldn't want
to meet the parents and then be like

357
00:24:30.559 --> 00:24:33.160
and then get dumbed a week later
and you're like, oh yeah, maybe

358
00:24:33.160 --> 00:24:34.480
that is the weird thing about living
someone up with their parents as you do.

359
00:24:34.599 --> 00:24:37.440
You kind of thrust into a situation
fairly early on the ordinarily you'd be

360
00:24:37.400 --> 00:24:40.720
able to avoid. But I don't
think he's a deal breaker for me.

361
00:24:41.079 --> 00:24:45.720
I mean, it's obviously not ideal. Okay, I don't think it's a

362
00:24:45.720 --> 00:24:48.960
deal breaker. I think it is
for me. Okay, you're wrong,

363
00:24:48.039 --> 00:24:55.880
but fine, it's not. It's
not. Um, So I still live,

364
00:24:55.960 --> 00:24:57.279
I still live at home, and
I'm saving a lot for a deposit

365
00:24:59.000 --> 00:25:00.519
and you'll get one baby, and
I will get one. My credit is

366
00:25:00.559 --> 00:25:04.079
fantastic, but I have a I
have good credit, but no money.

367
00:25:06.599 --> 00:25:10.799
Actually I just goes a financial details. Yeah, well credit and my my

368
00:25:10.839 --> 00:25:18.079
shore and my pin number is and
my only fans is you've been threatening?

369
00:25:18.200 --> 00:25:22.480
Only threatening? Isn't the probably the
right to threatening? I would love long,

370
00:25:22.599 --> 00:25:25.839
yeah, to go back to only
fans. I would love to have

371
00:25:25.880 --> 00:25:32.240
an only fans because I really like
sex. Yeah, I really enjoy sex,

372
00:25:32.400 --> 00:25:38.480
and I have the most beautiful my
my asshole is the Mona Lisa asshole.

373
00:25:40.039 --> 00:25:42.920
No, it's I mean I haven't
seen my my asshole, but um

374
00:25:44.640 --> 00:25:48.000
no, but I I mean I
do like I mean, if anyone tells

375
00:25:48.039 --> 00:25:52.680
me I'm pretty in real life,
I practically ejaculate. Anyway, if I've

376
00:25:52.680 --> 00:25:55.200
got people who are paying me to
watch it, like, I'd be like,

377
00:25:55.400 --> 00:26:00.599
he's gonna just from my god,
like the the go of that.

378
00:26:00.759 --> 00:26:03.880
It would be if anybody wants to
throw on the latch a free subscription of

379
00:26:03.880 --> 00:26:06.200
it, because if you have us
a subscribe to only fans, I haven't,

380
00:26:06.240 --> 00:26:07.160
I am a way to sting.
Well, okay, so if anybody

381
00:26:08.000 --> 00:26:11.920
has one, my thing not.
He doesn't have any he subscribes. He's

382
00:26:11.960 --> 00:26:17.480
definitely told I won't. He's definitely
subscribed to at least one is he he'll

383
00:26:17.480 --> 00:26:21.880
hate you for thrind out there.
I think that's why I won't name because

384
00:26:21.960 --> 00:26:26.359
yeah, I mean he's he's a
can't so it's fine. No, I

385
00:26:26.400 --> 00:26:30.759
won't name the person he follows because
well, yeah, I don't do that,

386
00:26:30.000 --> 00:26:33.359
but he's a fit. I checked
him out. Okay, but if

387
00:26:33.359 --> 00:26:36.759
anyone us like a free on the
latch subscription to your only fans, you

388
00:26:36.759 --> 00:26:38.839
can kind of get some ideas for
guys only fans that might don't be great

389
00:26:38.880 --> 00:26:42.160
only fans Like I remember I saw
this guy on twhere he had not only

390
00:26:42.200 --> 00:26:45.480
fans and I was hovering to say, am I going to pay the five

391
00:26:45.680 --> 00:26:49.839
ninety nine to subscribe to him?
And I said no? And then a

392
00:26:49.880 --> 00:26:53.079
week later I saw his nudes that
were on his only fans. Yeah,

393
00:26:53.200 --> 00:26:57.440
so eventually were they're worth a five
nine in your opinion? No, I'm

394
00:26:57.480 --> 00:27:07.000
like Greenpeace subscription. They were fantastic. OX fan doesn't need me. They

395
00:27:07.039 --> 00:27:10.519
were definitely fantastic. But now that
I've seen them, like, I feel

396
00:27:10.559 --> 00:27:17.400
like I would subscribe to only fans
look through everything within an hour download I

397
00:27:17.440 --> 00:27:19.480
needed to download, or screen shot
I need to screen Then you get no

398
00:27:19.599 --> 00:27:23.200
new ship. Then I'm fine with
Yeah for ten pounds a month, I

399
00:27:23.240 --> 00:27:27.680
want like like four posted. Yeah, I mean you want at least one

400
00:27:27.680 --> 00:27:33.240
a week? No, yah,
fifty a week for a nude Well,

401
00:27:33.960 --> 00:27:37.000
no, I would want a video
a week, right? A bit of

402
00:27:37.000 --> 00:27:41.839
what though, like how far?
Like having a wank? Like being DP?

403
00:27:41.200 --> 00:27:45.599
Like what what is value for money
in your opinion? A little bit

404
00:27:45.640 --> 00:27:48.640
of everything? A little bit of
everything. A really good come shot would

405
00:27:48.680 --> 00:27:52.880
be nice. Okay? Um?
Anyway, on the last business advice,

406
00:27:52.920 --> 00:27:59.119
you're only fan, but no,
it's consultation fee. Also, I wouldn't

407
00:27:59.119 --> 00:28:02.839
want like I would paying only fans
for like an a non person. I'd

408
00:28:02.880 --> 00:28:03.799
want to see their face, et
cetera. Yeah, yeah, yes,

409
00:28:03.839 --> 00:28:11.359
definitely, I'd be like I want
everyth being schema take schemer. Let me

410
00:28:11.480 --> 00:28:15.799
know if if I if I do
it, I'm not I'm not going to

411
00:28:15.880 --> 00:28:22.119
do it, like I really would
be tempted. I really like people saying

412
00:28:22.160 --> 00:28:25.079
nice things about me, so that
would be really nice way for that,

413
00:28:25.119 --> 00:28:33.400
and you make money too. Yeah
anyway, Jordan Jordan for the fourth date

414
00:28:33.559 --> 00:28:37.839
says that he Jordan's older than you
for this one scenario. Okay, okay,

415
00:28:38.119 --> 00:28:41.599
not really. He has a few
older friends. Yeah you don't like

416
00:28:41.640 --> 00:28:45.039
older deer, No, no,
I do. So I haven't made it

417
00:28:45.079 --> 00:28:48.440
to fourth term. Yeah yeah,
yeah you did. You didn't, yeah,

418
00:28:48.480 --> 00:28:52.599
you you just you just fucked once
and then and go. Um,

419
00:28:52.680 --> 00:28:56.279
Jordan has you over to a friend's
dinner. They're all older. And this

420
00:28:56.400 --> 00:29:00.680
is a scenario that happened in a
Netflix series called Tale from the City,

421
00:29:00.720 --> 00:29:03.279
which is so good and you should
all watch it. Everyone listening at home.

422
00:29:03.319 --> 00:29:07.799
It's really moving. It's about the
LGBTQ community in San Francisco. It's

423
00:29:07.839 --> 00:29:11.880
on Netflix. It's at Yesterday.
It's really good. You cry, you

424
00:29:11.960 --> 00:29:14.720
laugh, it's great. It's not
perfect. Or is it a movie,

425
00:29:14.880 --> 00:29:18.359
it's it's a mini series. It's
actually it's um. It was on in

426
00:29:18.480 --> 00:29:22.640
the nighties and early noughties and I
went back. It's got Laura Linney in

427
00:29:22.680 --> 00:29:27.559
it, Ellen Page, olympiad Carcass, that hot guy from from Looking,

428
00:29:29.119 --> 00:29:32.000
the one who I think ran like
the sort of like he was it's American

429
00:29:32.079 --> 00:29:33.880
and he was like, I'm going
to open like a Perry Perie chicken sharp,

430
00:29:33.920 --> 00:29:37.039
and everyone's like it's so cool,
and all the bricks are like,

431
00:29:37.119 --> 00:29:41.920
that's a Nando's bitch. But anyway, so he writes you over and then

432
00:29:41.000 --> 00:29:47.039
some of the older friends in passing
in conversation use a word that you don't

433
00:29:47.039 --> 00:29:51.200
agree with. In in Tales from
the City, one of the older guys,

434
00:29:51.200 --> 00:29:55.640
older gays, says tranny and the
younger gay has a huge issue with

435
00:29:55.680 --> 00:29:59.759
that. What would would that be
a deal breaker our older friend? How

436
00:29:59.759 --> 00:30:03.119
does Jordan react? The young guy? No? How so I'm at this

437
00:30:03.200 --> 00:30:08.920
day with Jordan, George Jordan.
We'll say what he does in the Netflix

438
00:30:08.960 --> 00:30:14.759
series, which is just sort of
like clearly on his part does not like

439
00:30:14.880 --> 00:30:18.240
the use of that world. But
it's too embarrassed to stand up for you

440
00:30:18.480 --> 00:30:21.480
when you sit when you call it
out, okay, tell, he tells

441
00:30:21.519 --> 00:30:25.599
you to calm down and talk about
it at home. There's there's an issue

442
00:30:25.640 --> 00:30:29.519
because I understand in the public place, I'm not going to make this huge

443
00:30:29.599 --> 00:30:32.720
scene, but I'm going to call
it out as I see it in a

444
00:30:32.880 --> 00:30:37.000
respectful way. Like you know,
that word is geographry. We don't use

445
00:30:37.000 --> 00:30:41.200
that word amore. We've evolved from
using such phrases yeah, and that's the

446
00:30:41.240 --> 00:30:44.960
respect of the community. As a
part of the word was trany, wasn't

447
00:30:45.000 --> 00:30:47.279
it. Yeah, So as a
part of the LGBT, I am sorry,

448
00:30:47.279 --> 00:30:48.480
by the way to have said that
world by the way, everyone,

449
00:30:48.519 --> 00:30:53.559
but for the purpose of the conversation, it is important. So we've all

450
00:30:53.839 --> 00:30:59.759
moved on from saying such words because
it is hurtful. So we're all trying

451
00:30:59.759 --> 00:31:02.880
to be a lot more loving,
a lot more understanding within our own community.

452
00:31:02.920 --> 00:31:07.079
So as you you may be an
older gentleman within the community, and

453
00:31:07.240 --> 00:31:11.119
I can say you're from a different
era, and this is why I'm actually

454
00:31:11.119 --> 00:31:15.759
speaking to you now about because we've
moved on. But I would not like

455
00:31:15.880 --> 00:31:21.160
you to use that phrase period,
not around me. Just adapt your vocabulary.

456
00:31:21.200 --> 00:31:25.119
This is what's actually happening now,
because you will say that again and

457
00:31:25.200 --> 00:31:29.920
someone might not respond to you the
way I'm responsing to you. So if

458
00:31:30.200 --> 00:31:33.759
Jordan didn't defend me in that,
because if he's if he also has a

459
00:31:33.759 --> 00:31:37.279
problem with this as not kind of
chiding to say, yeah, I've heard

460
00:31:37.319 --> 00:31:41.119
you say it a few times and
kind of following what I'm doing to help

461
00:31:41.200 --> 00:31:45.039
the point become a lot stronger,
then I'll turn around and just say do

462
00:31:45.079 --> 00:31:48.400
you have no backbone? Yeah,
there's an issue with that. You don't

463
00:31:48.400 --> 00:31:53.359
agree. This is your friend,
that's true. You should have told him

464
00:31:53.440 --> 00:31:56.759
a while ago. I've just met
him and I've said it really politely that

465
00:31:56.799 --> 00:32:00.039
you shouldn't be using this word and
you're not defending me this. So what

466
00:32:00.119 --> 00:32:04.400
do you believe in a zense?
Because you're telling me you believe in it,

467
00:32:04.599 --> 00:32:07.200
but your actions don't show not enough
to say anything about it, right,

468
00:32:07.240 --> 00:32:10.160
So you don't take this seriously?
John, I find this question really

469
00:32:10.160 --> 00:32:15.440
interesting. Thank you. It's not
your question is that you've ripped it off

470
00:32:15.440 --> 00:32:21.440
from Netflix. Yeah, but still
it works work in watch ten hours of

471
00:32:21.480 --> 00:32:29.720
Talented because I've got a job.
I think I only came out two weeks

472
00:32:29.720 --> 00:32:36.920
ago. I think it's really important
to calmly educate people, and you're very

473
00:32:37.000 --> 00:32:44.799
rarely going to change somebody's mind or
change your opinion having screaming match or you

474
00:32:44.839 --> 00:32:49.680
know, gobbing off has to be
done in a calm and respectful and constructive

475
00:32:49.680 --> 00:32:52.440
way, and there has got a
bit There has got to be a bit

476
00:32:52.440 --> 00:32:54.920
of back and forth in that.
However, the reason I find it interesting

477
00:32:55.119 --> 00:33:00.759
is because one of my friends and
we were talking about so fair just now

478
00:33:00.960 --> 00:33:07.440
is quite like he likes to pay
Devil's advocate in like in every situation,

479
00:33:07.920 --> 00:33:15.519
which I find terribly like, yeah, problematic, and to play there's advocate,

480
00:33:15.559 --> 00:33:19.359
he has to kind of delve into
things that I am like, oh,

481
00:33:19.359 --> 00:33:24.839
why are you like even like humoring
this opinion that, yeah, you

482
00:33:24.880 --> 00:33:30.240
allegedly don't have um. And I've
known him for eleven years, so I

483
00:33:30.759 --> 00:33:35.599
know he's not a bad person.
But when he meets new people, they

484
00:33:35.599 --> 00:33:39.640
don't know that. And because he's
so comfortable in debating me, you know,

485
00:33:39.759 --> 00:33:44.400
like he he always calls me like
a lefty, looney, etcetera,

486
00:33:44.440 --> 00:33:47.440
etcetera, because which is fine,
That's absolutely fine. But like I said,

487
00:33:47.440 --> 00:33:51.680
I know he's not an awful person, and I'm kind of happy to

488
00:33:51.759 --> 00:33:54.160
debate him back and forth like he's
mom Vocus of Rexit's party's grown up in

489
00:33:54.200 --> 00:34:01.400
like proper like Tory area and those
and he lives till it lives to lives

490
00:34:01.400 --> 00:34:05.640
with his mum, so he's kind
of had it. Has these opinions through

491
00:34:05.839 --> 00:34:07.760
him all the time, and I
don't why. I don't think he agrees

492
00:34:07.800 --> 00:34:10.199
with them, right. He will
then come to me and be like,

493
00:34:10.239 --> 00:34:14.000
well, this is what. So
he's not telling me his opinion, has

494
00:34:14.000 --> 00:34:16.079
telling me like his family's opinion,
and it kind of turns into this,

495
00:34:17.079 --> 00:34:21.000
you know, me calling his mum
essentially a tour He come like, there's

496
00:34:21.039 --> 00:34:22.320
kind of how it kapes into that, and then he's like, yeah,

497
00:34:22.360 --> 00:34:25.000
but so he Philesia has to defend
his mum. And that's where we get

498
00:34:25.000 --> 00:34:30.320
into arouse because you know, very
close, very close to the bone,

499
00:34:30.320 --> 00:34:34.199
because you're like, where are you
calling my mother a racist? And you're

500
00:34:34.239 --> 00:34:36.840
like, yeah, yeah, I
really am, yeah, absolutely, you

501
00:34:36.880 --> 00:34:38.400
know, and then he will pay
Dere's aftergott on that part. So like

502
00:34:39.400 --> 00:34:46.320
for me, if Jordan Will had
held that opinion of or thought use of

503
00:34:46.320 --> 00:34:49.960
that word was acceptable, yeah,
that is a deal breaker. Yes,

504
00:34:50.039 --> 00:34:54.360
some people, some people feel like
some people just coast through life and not

505
00:34:55.000 --> 00:35:00.440
and not be a bad person,
but not be like a warrior, not

506
00:35:00.559 --> 00:35:02.000
be a warrior place. Yeah,
not be a warrior for social change.

507
00:35:02.000 --> 00:35:07.199
There have no rights and wrongs.
They won't stepping beside the barrier and they

508
00:35:07.239 --> 00:35:09.880
and they would avoid confrontation. Doesn't
make you a bad person, right,

509
00:35:12.400 --> 00:35:16.440
But for me in that situation,
I'll be like, don't use that word

510
00:35:16.679 --> 00:35:21.000
of course. Yeah, I don't
know if answer your question or not.

511
00:35:21.159 --> 00:35:24.360
No, no, you did.
I think I think there's a certain It's

512
00:35:24.440 --> 00:35:29.400
really interesting, sort of like Jordan's
sitting there not saying anything. I love

513
00:35:29.480 --> 00:35:35.119
Jordan, what a good name.
Jordan's sitting there not saying anything because he's

514
00:35:35.119 --> 00:35:37.440
embarrassed, And Jordan sitting there not
saying anything because he agrees. It is

515
00:35:37.480 --> 00:35:40.079
a different thing, too, very
different. One is cowardly, yes,

516
00:35:40.599 --> 00:35:45.599
but the other is bad, bad, bad. Yeah. Okay, well

517
00:35:45.599 --> 00:35:47.199
on that note, because you brought
it up, and it makes sense to

518
00:35:47.199 --> 00:35:51.440
segue into this one. Okay,
Jordan comes and meets you date four in

519
00:35:51.480 --> 00:35:54.000
a pub. You haven't had that
bad scenario happened? Good? Going back

520
00:35:54.400 --> 00:35:59.480
again, and it's just the European
elections have just been and he's like,

521
00:35:59.559 --> 00:36:01.880
oh, worry, I'm slightly late. I've just been at the vote polling

522
00:36:01.920 --> 00:36:06.119
booth, voting for the European elections. And you say, yeah, we

523
00:36:06.199 --> 00:36:10.559
stand a diplomatic queen. We love
someone who votes. Um, I mean

524
00:36:10.599 --> 00:36:15.239
I wouldn't date someone who didn't vote. Anyway. That's moving on, good

525
00:36:15.280 --> 00:36:17.320
guys. Let's say he sits down
and say and you're like, oh,

526
00:36:17.480 --> 00:36:20.400
don't, don't worry, but you
don't have to tell me if you don't

527
00:36:20.400 --> 00:36:22.559
want to butt out of interest.
Who did you vote for? And he

528
00:36:22.599 --> 00:36:25.840
says the Brexit Party. I'm off, I'm off, I'm done. I'll

529
00:36:25.840 --> 00:36:30.440
see you later. I'm out the
door for him. Oh, it's interesting

530
00:36:30.440 --> 00:36:35.400
you're pausing because I want to say
no, but I'm tired of us agreeing.

531
00:36:37.480 --> 00:36:39.440
I would say, I would say
I'm going to be fair. I

532
00:36:39.480 --> 00:36:47.719
would gone Tory. Oh I'm gone
too, but I would I would see,

533
00:36:47.960 --> 00:36:51.719
I would have more conversation. Let
me let me see what your mind

534
00:36:51.719 --> 00:36:54.440
actually is and how you actually because
you might vote a Tory, but you

535
00:36:54.480 --> 00:36:58.840
could be like center right. Yeah, it's interesting. There are there are

536
00:36:58.840 --> 00:37:00.719
people who vote Tory because does it
makes sense in their area, because their

537
00:37:00.800 --> 00:37:05.400
Tory MPU does the actual guild good
work, blah blah, but they're still

538
00:37:05.480 --> 00:37:12.559
voting in the kind of problematic awful. Yeah. It all depends on the

539
00:37:12.599 --> 00:37:15.039
conversation you have. So with with
Brexit by there's no conversation need to have,

540
00:37:15.239 --> 00:37:20.119
right, But with Tory, let's
have a conversation. Interesting, Let's

541
00:37:20.199 --> 00:37:23.119
let's let's go to date four and
date five. Because your political belief is,

542
00:37:23.119 --> 00:37:25.639
are you want to ask, but
to who you are, because I

543
00:37:25.679 --> 00:37:29.159
wouldn't want to date someone that's exactly
the same as me. I will,

544
00:37:29.239 --> 00:37:31.360
I will. I would want to
have that kind of fiery passion to be

545
00:37:31.360 --> 00:37:35.159
able to understand from different point of
views. Yeah, that way you're able

546
00:37:35.159 --> 00:37:37.320
to get a wider view of life. I don't know, I think,

547
00:37:37.360 --> 00:37:44.679
but I would stay. I think
how you've I disagree into a lot that

548
00:37:44.719 --> 00:37:47.440
I think how you vote as how
you vote says a lot about who you

549
00:37:47.480 --> 00:37:52.719
are fundamentally as a person, and
that's definitely changed. I've got older.

550
00:37:52.920 --> 00:37:55.400
Like when I was twenty two,
twenty three, I probably wouldn't have given

551
00:37:55.440 --> 00:37:59.599
a ship. It wouldn't be right
be a question that even into my mind,

552
00:38:00.199 --> 00:38:04.719
Whereas now I don't know. Like
we're so much more engaged in politics.

553
00:38:04.800 --> 00:38:06.480
Yeah, and I think because we
have to be, we have to

554
00:38:06.480 --> 00:38:08.920
be. I think the generation,
the generation behind us probably be much more

555
00:38:08.960 --> 00:38:13.199
involved in politics, much more aware
of politics than than we are than we

556
00:38:13.199 --> 00:38:16.639
were at their range I was.
But yeah, I would like Brexit party.

557
00:38:16.639 --> 00:38:23.440
I'm gone Tories, I'm gone so
Apose you give is a separate party,

558
00:38:23.480 --> 00:38:28.440
but you give breakit basically the same. So would you do so lib

559
00:38:28.480 --> 00:38:31.639
dems, I could. I can
understand anywhere else. I can understand lib

560
00:38:31.639 --> 00:38:37.039
dems. I can understand labor,
and I can understand greens. Because I

561
00:38:37.559 --> 00:38:39.679
got a text message from this guy
that I used to fuck a little bit.

562
00:38:40.039 --> 00:38:44.400
We'd get together every non like we
met a good ten years ago.

563
00:38:44.760 --> 00:38:46.559
No, how old am I you're
thirty one? Oh my god, nine

564
00:38:46.639 --> 00:38:52.119
years ago. Nine years ago he
was living in an open's day house.

565
00:38:53.840 --> 00:38:59.400
It's like doing the Da Vinci Code
where that monk beats himself before bed every

566
00:38:59.480 --> 00:39:05.480
night because he so devout, we
devout Catholic sect. So he was living

567
00:39:05.519 --> 00:39:08.320
in an opus day house in Hampstead. Oh you think he might have mentioned

568
00:39:08.360 --> 00:39:14.639
this briefly interesting anyway, and he
would like flee every now and again,

569
00:39:14.800 --> 00:39:19.480
find someone online and come over to
being made love to by a man.

570
00:39:21.440 --> 00:39:24.159
So anyway, so he used to
come over, and then that kind of

571
00:39:24.320 --> 00:39:28.559
that aspect of our friendship sort of
stopped, and we just would grab a

572
00:39:28.599 --> 00:39:31.960
drink every six months and every now
and again. You know, things happen.

573
00:39:32.480 --> 00:39:37.000
Anyway, It's been a while since
I've seen him at all. And

574
00:39:37.039 --> 00:39:40.159
then look, two weeks ago he
messaged me to say we should grab a

575
00:39:40.239 --> 00:39:44.440
drink before I move away. And
I was like, oh, where are

576
00:39:44.480 --> 00:39:45.880
you going? We should grab a
drink before you go away, and he's

577
00:39:45.880 --> 00:39:50.719
like, I'm moving to Brussels.
I got elected and I was like,

578
00:39:51.719 --> 00:39:53.920
I didn't know you were running for
anything, like elected for whom? And

579
00:39:53.920 --> 00:40:01.599
he was like the Brexit Party and
I just replied saying I was like,

580
00:40:01.639 --> 00:40:07.239
but I was just like, good
luck. That's a note of a drink,

581
00:40:07.480 --> 00:40:09.000
and I, you know, I
hope you have a nice life.

582
00:40:09.159 --> 00:40:14.360
It was just like men almost was
like blocking the number until I got the

583
00:40:14.440 --> 00:40:17.840
message, just saying no, no, I was joking and I was,

584
00:40:17.880 --> 00:40:21.920
and he was like he was he
could not believe that you believed him,

585
00:40:21.960 --> 00:40:23.840
but no, but we couldn't believe
I believed him. But actually he is

586
00:40:23.840 --> 00:40:28.639
a I mean, the fact I
did believe him is kind of maybe actually

587
00:40:28.639 --> 00:40:31.480
a friendship should end anyway. He's
never been brex He's always been like a

588
00:40:31.599 --> 00:40:35.840
major Tory, and I can kind
of get over that that's your type them

589
00:40:35.840 --> 00:40:38.719
in it. No, No it's
not, it's not my type. My

590
00:40:38.719 --> 00:40:43.920
type problem is that my type is
like having nice sheets and having nice and

591
00:40:44.079 --> 00:40:47.519
having nice kitchens, and sometimes that
is Tory. Yeah, because you know

592
00:40:47.679 --> 00:40:51.480
they've they voted for the rich,
not for the poor. Yeah, so

593
00:40:51.480 --> 00:40:54.440
obviously they're richer because they voted a
policy that like enables them to save money.

594
00:40:54.800 --> 00:41:00.360
Anyway, so it's difficult. But
anyway, he couldn't believe, first

595
00:41:00.360 --> 00:41:01.800
of all that I believed it,
But that's a moot point because I did

596
00:41:01.880 --> 00:41:05.880
believe it. And the second one, but he couldn't believe. That was

597
00:41:05.920 --> 00:41:07.920
like a deal breaker, like I
wouldn't want to see him again, Like

598
00:41:07.960 --> 00:41:12.519
I was ready getting ready to block
his block his number. Yeah, and

599
00:41:12.599 --> 00:41:15.719
I actually can't believe. I mean, I suppose maybe you have to lack

600
00:41:15.800 --> 00:41:17.920
that self awareness if you are voting
for that kind of party, you have

601
00:41:19.000 --> 00:41:21.360
to be like, what do you
mean, I'm still one of you?

602
00:41:21.719 --> 00:41:25.039
Yeah, maybe maybe you wouldn't be
able to vote for these people. Yeah,

603
00:41:25.320 --> 00:41:30.559
I guess if you've got any Tory
friends, I do have one or

604
00:41:30.559 --> 00:41:36.599
two, but we've meant most most
of I mean I went to Oxford,

605
00:41:36.599 --> 00:41:43.000
I have I know Tories, most
of our most of actually all of the

606
00:41:43.199 --> 00:41:46.840
Tories in my inner circle are no
longer Tories. Okay, so they've brexit

607
00:41:46.920 --> 00:41:52.320
pie Yeah yeah, no, no
Brexit no, like you know, over

608
00:41:52.480 --> 00:41:55.840
like over the years they've won by
one either gone Labor or lib Dem or

609
00:41:57.079 --> 00:42:04.039
Green or whatever, um out of
circle. I definitely know Tories people who

610
00:42:04.119 --> 00:42:07.639
still vote for the Tories and we
will just have the occasional blazing row and

611
00:42:07.639 --> 00:42:10.840
then leave at that. One of
my friends is very liberal, very funny,

612
00:42:10.960 --> 00:42:15.719
like she's so kind of like cool, like she's my coolest friend.

613
00:42:15.760 --> 00:42:19.440
But like a couple of elections ago
was like, I'm thinking about voting for

614
00:42:19.480 --> 00:42:22.320
UKIP and I was like, I
was like, what we have this blazing

615
00:42:22.400 --> 00:42:28.239
row aside this pupin sohaside the coach
and horses. It's awful, but wow,

616
00:42:28.320 --> 00:42:30.239
yeah, I mean I was ready
to go. I was just ready

617
00:42:30.280 --> 00:42:32.719
to be like that's it. Yeah, but where is the line. Evidently

618
00:42:32.760 --> 00:42:38.199
my line is lower than yours to
being friends the Tories. So I've got

619
00:42:38.239 --> 00:42:43.000
like probably one Tory friend. I
just wouldn't you just wouldn't sum no,

620
00:42:43.239 --> 00:42:49.559
fully wouldn't fuck him. And I
feel like political affiliation comes up fairly early.

621
00:42:50.039 --> 00:42:52.599
I don't think i'd get to date
four without finding out, and it

622
00:42:52.639 --> 00:42:54.039
wouldn't be like who did you vote
for me? I mean, I don't

623
00:42:54.079 --> 00:42:59.000
think it does come up real early
for me. It's just implied with people

624
00:43:00.079 --> 00:43:01.719
maybe doing people. If you met
me at the bar, do you think

625
00:43:01.719 --> 00:43:04.880
I was? Yeah? I fully
would. Really, yeah, I'm still

626
00:43:04.920 --> 00:43:07.559
not convinced you're not. That's really
upsetting to me, is it? Yeah?

627
00:43:07.679 --> 00:43:10.480
Is it because I drink champagne I
got to clarages? Yeah, yes,

628
00:43:12.840 --> 00:43:16.239
that's not fair. But I also
think because we live in such like

629
00:43:16.320 --> 00:43:20.719
not a Tory because I drink champagne
and got a clariges, because we live

630
00:43:20.760 --> 00:43:25.360
in such like a politically charged environment, you are like politics is more like

631
00:43:25.400 --> 00:43:30.639
to come up in general. Yeah, we had the lecture once every five

632
00:43:30.719 --> 00:43:32.840
years, and nobody really paid attention
because it was boring to them. Whereas

633
00:43:32.840 --> 00:43:36.800
now it's exciting and gripping, and
nobody knows what's happening from day to day,

634
00:43:36.800 --> 00:43:38.880
and the top news story is constantly
something to do with politics. Like

635
00:43:39.159 --> 00:43:43.920
politics is going to come up in
a conversation much earlier on than it would

636
00:43:43.920 --> 00:43:46.519
in the fucking Blair days, for
example. That's true, that's true.

637
00:43:46.880 --> 00:43:52.239
Anyway, what's an extra Tory camp. I'm just I'm really, I'm I'm

638
00:43:52.239 --> 00:43:59.159
really anyway, I changed my entire
personality. I'll just have to start.

639
00:44:00.119 --> 00:44:02.239
Is the few they want I'm just
given and vote Tory. Then fuck you.

640
00:44:02.320 --> 00:44:07.360
I liked I like Champagne too much. Okay, this this is a

641
00:44:07.719 --> 00:44:10.159
This is a dale breaker. It
comes from Sex in the City and episode

642
00:44:10.159 --> 00:44:15.960
of Sex in the City. Okay, yeah, a man so Jordan,

643
00:44:16.559 --> 00:44:22.239
likes you to swallow. Okay,
but his come tastes rotten. Okay,

644
00:44:22.440 --> 00:44:24.159
okay. First of all, First
that happens in Sex and City. Kim

645
00:44:24.199 --> 00:44:29.199
control sex is dick. She wants
to swallow, and she says it's the

646
00:44:29.239 --> 00:44:32.760
funkiest tasting spunk she's ever stop it
no make me, and it makes carry

647
00:44:32.760 --> 00:44:37.320
Bradshaw cancel the rice pudding order of
dessert at the rest rice pudding. Oh

648
00:44:37.360 --> 00:44:40.239
yeah, I hate rice pudding too, so la it tastes like rotten rice

649
00:44:40.280 --> 00:44:45.880
pudding. I will tell you that
everything else is like boom. I will

650
00:44:45.920 --> 00:44:49.239
tell you. I will spit it
out. He wants you to swallow it.

651
00:44:49.360 --> 00:44:51.079
No, no, no, no, no no, no, it's

652
00:44:51.119 --> 00:44:52.719
not happening. It's not happening.
It's written on my face that I don't

653
00:44:52.760 --> 00:45:00.280
like it. My gag reflex will
for once react and I will just I

654
00:45:00.280 --> 00:45:04.920
will just say after if you're offended, that I've not swallowed you then I'm

655
00:45:04.960 --> 00:45:10.119
offended by your overall diet, like
you're eating too much shit. Go have

656
00:45:10.519 --> 00:45:15.920
go on a fruit binge for like
a week at least, and then maybe

657
00:45:15.000 --> 00:45:20.119
next time you can be swallowed.
But for now, it's no, okay,

658
00:45:20.480 --> 00:45:22.360
Wow, I like that you taste
that battery, I said. I

659
00:45:22.400 --> 00:45:28.719
know people many people have said like, yeah, I've swallowed, but it

660
00:45:28.800 --> 00:45:30.960
taste a Nasces said, so you
have no self respects because why are you

661
00:45:30.960 --> 00:45:37.559
swallowing something that generally lasty? Why
would you do that? I mean,

662
00:45:37.639 --> 00:45:42.199
I can tell you the last time
I was swallowed. It's very rare that

663
00:45:42.239 --> 00:45:45.320
someone comes to my mouth. I've
got to be honest. So I mean

664
00:45:45.800 --> 00:45:49.320
probably even the fact that needs to
go near my face is a dealbreaker for

665
00:45:49.400 --> 00:45:58.400
me. And then like dawn,
my fucking throat. Um. So I'm

666
00:45:58.400 --> 00:46:00.679
going to call it a deal breaker. It's so interesting. No, I'm

667
00:46:00.719 --> 00:46:06.159
not saying it's not a deal breaker
from me because like, but I it's

668
00:46:06.199 --> 00:46:12.079
a deal breaker from me because I
love to swallow too. That's why that's

669
00:46:12.119 --> 00:46:13.760
why the dick needs to do,
you know what I mean? Like,

670
00:46:13.800 --> 00:46:16.760
so, yeah, I think I
would be like, let's let's work on

671
00:46:16.760 --> 00:46:20.280
the diet plan. Yeah, let's
get your planet of strawberries. No,

672
00:46:20.320 --> 00:46:22.360
I'm allergic to pineapple. No pineapple
like atty much as if facts how I

673
00:46:22.360 --> 00:46:28.559
died very young brand, it would
be very very brand. Okay, so

674
00:46:28.559 --> 00:46:31.239
it's interesting. So yeah, funky
spunk is too much for John. Yeah,

675
00:46:31.239 --> 00:46:36.760
I mean yeah, it's funky more
than once on. So you need

676
00:46:36.800 --> 00:46:39.639
to fix this or we're not going
any further because or it's just not going

677
00:46:39.639 --> 00:46:43.239
to my mom. Yeah, Like
if it's just because he had asparagus and

678
00:46:43.320 --> 00:46:47.199
coca and like, what are those
um sugar paths for breakfast? Are they

679
00:46:47.280 --> 00:46:52.280
particularly bad for Well, they do
make your your instinct I imagine we would

680
00:46:52.280 --> 00:46:55.159
probably have a similar effect on the
other things. Does asparagus effect come as

681
00:46:55.159 --> 00:46:58.320
well as you're in I don't know. Definitely, I don't know. I

682
00:46:58.360 --> 00:47:02.960
don't know. I'm not if it's
like a biologist culinary asked what effects spoke

683
00:47:04.400 --> 00:47:07.119
Yeah, oh yeah, I want
to know. I'm really curious. And

684
00:47:07.239 --> 00:47:09.880
also, just like at us generally, when you're listening to this episode in

685
00:47:09.960 --> 00:47:14.119
terms of like what is a deal
breaker for you? We are at on

686
00:47:14.199 --> 00:47:17.199
the Latch on Twitter, We're at
on the Latch podcast on Instagram, And

687
00:47:17.360 --> 00:47:21.679
if you just want to talk about
that in Gmail. We'll we'll chat what

688
00:47:21.719 --> 00:47:27.320
does your come taste like? That's
a joke, obviously, I already I

689
00:47:27.360 --> 00:47:31.920
already, I already know on Latch
podcast at gmail dot com. Um.

690
00:47:32.159 --> 00:47:37.559
I think that's going to wrap up
the deal breaker segment of the episode because

691
00:47:37.719 --> 00:47:44.159
I've learned too much about myself and
other people. So we will be back

692
00:47:44.199 --> 00:47:52.639
after this short break. Thank you. Okay, welcome back to On the

693
00:47:52.719 --> 00:47:57.639
Latch. You're here with guy John
and raheem best three three. I say

694
00:47:57.679 --> 00:48:05.199
that every time which ever three year, whatsoever? Truly we are theon's like

695
00:48:05.159 --> 00:48:09.400
who's your favorite? And I'm like, whichever one is next to me that

696
00:48:09.559 --> 00:48:13.440
party this week? When exactly ever
party this week? Someone was like,

697
00:48:13.840 --> 00:48:15.880
oh, so, what's going on
like between you and Ben? I'm like,

698
00:48:15.880 --> 00:48:22.440
no, Ben's my favorite. Um, so be back with us,

699
00:48:22.440 --> 00:48:24.840
obviously, and we're going to have
one dilemma this week, which is going

700
00:48:24.880 --> 00:48:28.840
to be right up by John because
he's already seen it and we haven't.

701
00:48:28.840 --> 00:48:32.320
So'll be a nice element of surprise
unless made is I'm getting a stry because

702
00:48:32.320 --> 00:48:37.760
we've already covered it. Right,
let's jump into it. Hey, guys,

703
00:48:37.760 --> 00:48:40.199
I love listening to on the latch
brought to you by Delivery and enjoy

704
00:48:40.320 --> 00:48:44.400
hearing all your anecdotes and heart folk
stories to come up every week. I'm

705
00:48:44.440 --> 00:48:46.280
currently working on a small island in
the middle of the Atlantic with overy little

706
00:48:46.320 --> 00:48:52.280
internet. So your podcast has been
keeping me saying nice, isn't it Imagine

707
00:48:52.360 --> 00:48:59.039
that we're somebody's sanity. Luck to
you. Fucking hell, I'll get the

708
00:48:59.119 --> 00:49:04.639
fucking padded cell ready. So where
in the world a small island limit of

709
00:49:04.679 --> 00:49:08.039
the Atlantic? Which one is the
Atlanta? Okay, we'll stay that you're

710
00:49:08.079 --> 00:49:10.039
feel listening Forrofit, Yeah, I'll
do that later. I have a little

711
00:49:10.079 --> 00:49:14.639
dilemma which I hope you can help
with. I don't have my boyfriend for

712
00:49:14.639 --> 00:49:17.000
almost two years, and we have
an acute flat together with other toast breakfast

713
00:49:17.000 --> 00:49:21.880
and minimal arguments about cleaning. I'm
a diplomat and I'll shortly be posted to

714
00:49:21.960 --> 00:49:25.320
a country in Africa which criminalizes homosexuality. Oh God. Despite the challenges,

715
00:49:25.320 --> 00:49:28.760
I think it's important for gay people
in a position of the privilege to work

716
00:49:28.800 --> 00:49:31.000
in difficult places and who knows,
potentially changed some minds along the way,

717
00:49:31.679 --> 00:49:37.079
Unlike a heterosexual couple. The country
I'm going to won't recognize my relationship,

718
00:49:37.119 --> 00:49:39.880
which means I can't bring on my
boyfriend to be my diplomat's wife. Were

719
00:49:40.440 --> 00:49:45.039
to go a long distance and thinking
about how to best make it work.

720
00:49:45.119 --> 00:49:47.159
We're both pretty open minded and accept
things. We need to be more flexible

721
00:49:47.239 --> 00:49:51.320
going forward. Were plans to each
other in person every couple of months than

722
00:49:51.360 --> 00:49:53.719
talk regularly. I was wondering if
you had any advice about how to make

723
00:49:53.760 --> 00:49:59.519
this work a mantu transition living together
from living together so close to you to

724
00:49:59.559 --> 00:50:02.280
living up so far apart. My
posting in Africa is likely the last two

725
00:50:02.360 --> 00:50:07.119
years wow, and I won't know
where I'm going next until about halfway in.

726
00:50:07.719 --> 00:50:10.840
Then certainty makes things difficult as I
can't give him any sense of security

727
00:50:10.920 --> 00:50:15.119
or reassurance. You can't say you'll
be welcome at the next one. Yeah,

728
00:50:15.480 --> 00:50:19.000
that will be back together in the
near future. I do love him,

729
00:50:19.000 --> 00:50:22.079
but this job is my dream and
comes with his own lifestyle and challenges.

730
00:50:22.480 --> 00:50:24.280
He's a few years older, perhaps
isn't as nervous as I am.

731
00:50:24.719 --> 00:50:29.159
He's so kind of supportive, but
I don't really want to take advantage of

732
00:50:29.239 --> 00:50:34.400
him and leave him hanging. That's
interesting isn't it. There's another bit.

733
00:50:34.440 --> 00:50:37.559
We'll got one too that afterwards,
sir. Yeah, anyway, I love

734
00:50:37.559 --> 00:50:39.679
to you will want thank you for
making me smiling regular basis, Well,

735
00:50:39.760 --> 00:50:45.000
thank you, I thank you.
I think lovely in the beginning, don't

736
00:50:45.039 --> 00:50:50.760
feel guilty about your career aspirations.
It's like, if you're like, that

737
00:50:51.000 --> 00:50:54.360
sounds like a huge deal. Yeah, like I'm saying no because of this

738
00:50:54.559 --> 00:50:58.159
man who you love, and I
will you know. I love love,

739
00:50:58.280 --> 00:51:00.199
and I love the idea of sacrificing
thing for love, and that's lovely.

740
00:51:00.800 --> 00:51:05.199
But at the same time, this
sounds like a big deal for someone like

741
00:51:06.320 --> 00:51:09.639
what you know someone, but you
sound like like for someone in diplomacy,

742
00:51:10.320 --> 00:51:14.599
like this sounds like a huge deal, And I think that's really exciting and

743
00:51:14.840 --> 00:51:22.239
interesting and you shouldn't feel guilty or
worry about leaving him behind. I think

744
00:51:22.320 --> 00:51:25.039
just if you're going to see each
other every couple of months, the answer

745
00:51:25.199 --> 00:51:31.119
is skype, lots of skype,
lots of regular contact, but mainly sitting

746
00:51:31.239 --> 00:51:37.400
down beforehand together and just being like
what, like what's the plan? Yeah?

747
00:51:37.679 --> 00:51:42.159
Yeah, like are we do you? I don't want to be open?

748
00:51:42.239 --> 00:51:43.840
Do you want to be open?
If you want to be open?

749
00:51:43.920 --> 00:51:45.960
How open do you want to be? Because if you want to be a

750
00:51:45.039 --> 00:51:47.320
tiny bit open, I can deal
with the tiny bit open, but like

751
00:51:47.880 --> 00:51:52.199
like, you have to kind of
I think, work out where your race

752
00:51:52.280 --> 00:51:55.599
shears are, what you're both comfortable
with. It sounds like he's kind of

753
00:51:55.679 --> 00:52:00.199
fine with it. Yeah, yeah, he does exactly. And I think

754
00:52:00.239 --> 00:52:02.199
if he's fine with it, go
for it. Yeah. Yeah, I

755
00:52:02.719 --> 00:52:06.639
have. One of my friends is
in a long distance relationship. He lives

756
00:52:06.679 --> 00:52:12.239
here and his partner lives in New
York, and I've said to him many

757
00:52:12.280 --> 00:52:17.480
times, how do you make this
work? And it was literally a communication.

758
00:52:17.639 --> 00:52:23.880
Communication yea communication. They see each
other every time I speak to him,

759
00:52:23.880 --> 00:52:28.320
and he's going on holiday, he's
going to see him, or they're

760
00:52:28.360 --> 00:52:32.199
going on holiday together to another destination, meeting in the middle somewhere. So

761
00:52:32.599 --> 00:52:37.840
it's all about how far you both
are willing to invest in keeping this relationship

762
00:52:37.880 --> 00:52:42.159
alive because it's not going to be
easy because there's going to be those days

763
00:52:42.239 --> 00:52:45.000
where you wake up, we just
had a really bad day, So you

764
00:52:45.079 --> 00:52:46.960
know what, I really just missed
my partner. He was just here and

765
00:52:47.159 --> 00:52:51.639
you have to deal with that reality
that they aren't there. So you're going

766
00:52:51.679 --> 00:52:54.519
to have to be a lot more
self assuring in this long distance relationship.

767
00:52:55.159 --> 00:53:00.400
And as Guy said, our conversation
needs to be hired about how or devination

768
00:53:00.519 --> 00:53:04.599
is going to work. Are you
going to be open with it because we

769
00:53:04.679 --> 00:53:07.400
all have we all have sexual needs
and it's not fair to lie about them.

770
00:53:07.559 --> 00:53:16.480
So would it be you see each
other let's say every every three months,

771
00:53:16.519 --> 00:53:20.639
he's each other four times a year. Let's say physically in that time,

772
00:53:21.800 --> 00:53:25.599
are you allowed to sleep with one
person to person? Are you going

773
00:53:25.679 --> 00:53:30.199
to open it out every so often
for the first year? Are you're going

774
00:53:30.280 --> 00:53:34.239
to keep it closed? Yeah?
Yeah, year, that's true. Are

775
00:53:34.280 --> 00:53:37.639
you going to open it up because
our physical needs do eventually start to take

776
00:53:37.719 --> 00:53:40.360
over? You're just like, I
can't. You're not sure if you're going

777
00:53:40.400 --> 00:53:44.519
to be able to do this for
the full two years. And even said

778
00:53:44.559 --> 00:53:47.039
half he's not going to know when
he's coming back away he's going next until

779
00:53:47.199 --> 00:53:50.960
a year in so that's going to
be a long time of uncertainty. Yeah,

780
00:53:51.639 --> 00:53:55.039
you both read. My advice is
just really really sit down and have

781
00:53:55.159 --> 00:54:00.280
a really open and frank conversation about
if this is going to work, because

782
00:54:00.320 --> 00:54:05.119
it may not work and it may
have It may be that choice where you

783
00:54:05.239 --> 00:54:10.320
have to let each other go for
the time being and wishful thinking in two

784
00:54:10.400 --> 00:54:15.079
years later you could actually pick up
where you left off. Because I met

785
00:54:15.119 --> 00:54:17.679
a. Oh if I would kill
me, I wouldn't like that. I'd

786
00:54:17.679 --> 00:54:22.559
be like, nope, nope,
I met a. If we're down,

787
00:54:22.639 --> 00:54:23.800
we're down for me. If you
break up with me, break up me,

788
00:54:23.880 --> 00:54:27.280
don't be like, maybe we can
revisit it in two years. I'd

789
00:54:27.280 --> 00:54:30.119
be like, fuck that. Oh
God, guy, where where it's romance?

790
00:54:30.360 --> 00:54:35.960
I'm very romantic. I met this. I met this couple who broke

791
00:54:36.079 --> 00:54:40.760
up fully for a year, did
not communicate. It was kind of a

792
00:54:40.920 --> 00:54:45.440
semi bad break up, okay,
and they went off to go do their

793
00:54:45.559 --> 00:54:47.880
thing, you know, they fucked
around. One of them had another relationship,

794
00:54:49.440 --> 00:54:52.960
and then within that space, within
that that year and a bit apart,

795
00:54:52.239 --> 00:54:55.079
they came back and they said,
no, it's you. I want

796
00:54:55.119 --> 00:55:00.440
to be with it. I mean. And they've been married ever since.

797
00:55:00.719 --> 00:55:06.400
They think they've been together for maybe
a decade. Well in total, including

798
00:55:06.440 --> 00:55:08.960
like the year break, they were
together for about a decade, and they

799
00:55:09.039 --> 00:55:16.239
have They've adopted kids, they live, they live the dream essentially so have

800
00:55:16.400 --> 00:55:22.039
the conversation. Yeah, yeah,
I think that's for me. I would

801
00:55:22.079 --> 00:55:25.320
say, like where you set the
initial GOO goal post is where they have

802
00:55:25.400 --> 00:55:30.239
to stay, so like you can
reassess, you can reevaluate, and like

803
00:55:30.400 --> 00:55:34.559
Forheim had said, like communication is
so important in this situation. You said

804
00:55:34.599 --> 00:55:37.880
you love each other, so you
know, don't show that away, like

805
00:55:37.960 --> 00:55:43.079
try and make it work. About
My instinct would be to not to not

806
00:55:43.280 --> 00:55:45.679
just be like, right, I'm
moving away, so this has to stop,

807
00:55:45.800 --> 00:55:47.280
like you just have to because that
hurts. Yeah exactly, you know,

808
00:55:47.360 --> 00:55:50.599
you have to get the communication open. And if you said, like

809
00:55:51.039 --> 00:55:54.280
not that he's not fast, but
like he is able to deal with it,

810
00:55:55.039 --> 00:55:58.559
isn't making a big deal out of
it, then great, And you

811
00:55:58.639 --> 00:56:00.360
know it sounds that you're doing an
incredible thing and you can go and try

812
00:56:00.400 --> 00:56:05.519
and change the world and that's amazing. He sounds very secure in himself because

813
00:56:05.559 --> 00:56:09.079
that's what you would department exactly.
Yeah exactly, yeah exactly, you know,

814
00:56:09.159 --> 00:56:12.719
and that must you know, that
must take a massive weight off for

815
00:56:13.079 --> 00:56:15.239
him to be there and be like
totally, this isn't a big deal,

816
00:56:15.400 --> 00:56:17.000
Like we can make this work.
It's just how you make it work,

817
00:56:17.039 --> 00:56:22.079
and that's going to come through like
open, honest, frank discussions and like

818
00:56:22.280 --> 00:56:23.559
you know, be prepared to meet
the goalpost. It's different points, like

819
00:56:23.639 --> 00:56:25.559
it hasn't got like I say,
it hasn't got to be where you set

820
00:56:25.599 --> 00:56:29.480
them in the first place is where
not they're gonna They're not going to stay

821
00:56:29.519 --> 00:56:32.159
there over you know, of the
course of two years, Yeah, long

822
00:56:32.239 --> 00:56:37.159
time. If it's of any just
if it's of any help, just man

823
00:56:37.280 --> 00:56:43.519
who was sent to Lemma, I
want to said Jordan, Jordan, if

824
00:56:43.559 --> 00:56:47.280
it like it's slightly different because my
friend is straight, but like his father

825
00:56:47.719 --> 00:56:52.440
was an ambassador to an African country
which I won't name because it's you know,

826
00:56:52.599 --> 00:56:55.679
it would identify him tweet easily.
But you know, he had a

827
00:56:55.760 --> 00:57:00.880
long term girlfriend and he was after
university, went to live in Ethiopia for

828
00:57:00.159 --> 00:57:05.960
probably about two years actually, and
probably saw each other a cup once every

829
00:57:06.000 --> 00:57:09.360
couple of months. Yeah, and
now we've been together for years and they

830
00:57:09.519 --> 00:57:14.320
love each other and they're happy,
and they've never been anything but happy.

831
00:57:14.480 --> 00:57:16.800
Obviously there's a frustration, of course, you miss people. You know,

832
00:57:16.920 --> 00:57:21.360
there was you know, they didn't
open up their relationship or anything like that.

833
00:57:21.679 --> 00:57:24.559
They just accepted it for a certain
amount of time. This is not

834
00:57:24.679 --> 00:57:28.559
forever, This is not forever,
but for a certain amount of time,

835
00:57:28.599 --> 00:57:30.199
it's going to be calls, it's
going to be skypes, it's going to

836
00:57:30.280 --> 00:57:35.679
be yeah, and then we're looking
forward to the three to four month meetups.

837
00:57:35.960 --> 00:57:38.920
Yeah, you know. Yeah,
it's completely achievable and completely doable if

838
00:57:38.960 --> 00:57:42.920
you both love each other and if
you both trust each other, Yeah,

839
00:57:43.960 --> 00:57:47.480
there is go ahead, and don't
for trust really does have to be there

840
00:57:47.480 --> 00:57:52.679
in this particular case, more so
than some instances, because it's going to

841
00:57:52.719 --> 00:57:55.159
be a lot easier for him to
fuck other people than it is for you.

842
00:57:55.480 --> 00:58:00.159
Yeah. Really, in terms of
location, yeah, there is not.

843
00:58:00.199 --> 00:58:01.519
But I should have mentioned that,
right and just to put that little

844
00:58:01.559 --> 00:58:05.760
seed of doubt in your brain.
But it'll be fine. It's all good.

845
00:58:06.679 --> 00:58:10.840
And there is another little part to
this message. We've seen this which

846
00:58:12.039 --> 00:58:14.639
I really love and this is shame
that Josh isn't here, but we will

847
00:58:14.639 --> 00:58:16.639
have to bring it back up with
him. Oh my god, So Josh

848
00:58:17.000 --> 00:58:21.000
on the light like, hey,
the black baby Fraser, Josh was my

849
00:58:21.159 --> 00:58:25.280
high school rival and all things drama
but truth time true, I'm so shocked.

850
00:58:25.320 --> 00:58:30.000
But with the arrival in drama.
I mean, were you upset when

851
00:58:30.000 --> 00:58:31.480
I got cast a Seymour in the
Little Shop of Horrors? Over you?

852
00:58:32.639 --> 00:58:36.679
You did seem a little bit bitter
at the time when you started the Little

853
00:58:36.719 --> 00:58:42.360
Shop of Shit. In this system
the director gave you allowed you to choreograph

854
00:58:42.400 --> 00:58:46.440
your own dance rout team to improve
the quality of the show. Love you,

855
00:58:46.599 --> 00:58:54.639
Josh, That is so funny,
So Josh. Josh did actually try

856
00:58:54.639 --> 00:58:59.440
to send us a voice note the
other day what he did explain in the

857
00:58:59.519 --> 00:59:01.159
voice note, but they deleted it
because he was so shit facing. It

858
00:59:02.719 --> 00:59:07.679
was hospital the teach why I never
did I could definitely see Josh not getting

859
00:59:07.679 --> 00:59:14.400
the lead and just take there for
sabotaging a pile of shit. You can't

860
00:59:14.440 --> 00:59:17.519
want to be Seymour. I'm going
to chereograph my own dance routine. Honestly.

861
00:59:17.639 --> 00:59:22.760
That is so jo. I wonder
what role they gave him. You

862
00:59:22.840 --> 00:59:27.039
know, we have to ask maybe
maybe the big plant that eats people to

863
00:59:27.239 --> 00:59:30.000
bring it back up at a later
date. I like the sound of this

864
00:59:30.119 --> 00:59:34.000
person too. Maybe I prefer him
over Josh. You want to come join

865
00:59:34.039 --> 00:59:37.639
the show after time? Yeah?
Where also like Gosh, you you like

866
00:59:37.800 --> 00:59:45.000
if you're on that sort of Atlantic
island right now. M Like, you're

867
00:59:45.079 --> 00:59:49.239
busy, You're mean, when do
you when do you last see your boyfriend?

868
00:59:50.159 --> 00:59:53.800
You must already being supportive? Yeah, where's the Atlantic? Because I'm

869
00:59:53.800 --> 00:59:58.400
just because I'm just thinking, like
you're not already there, aren't you?

870
00:59:58.519 --> 01:00:04.519
Because the only the only islands off
the coast of Africa, I mean Atlantic,

871
01:00:04.599 --> 01:00:07.280
quick coast are No, I don't
think. I think he's a different

872
01:00:07.320 --> 01:00:10.880
arts Okay, it's different posting.
Yeah. So therefore, like he's already

873
01:00:10.920 --> 01:00:16.280
getting practice in, Like it's good, you're already practicing the separation. God,

874
01:00:16.360 --> 01:00:21.920
you stund successful. If it doesn't
work out with nice, trustworthy man,

875
01:00:22.320 --> 01:00:28.480
it got me up. Anybody got
anything else? I mean, I

876
01:00:28.599 --> 01:00:32.079
think the thing about I just want
to mention just with with with long distant

877
01:00:32.079 --> 01:00:36.880
relationships, it's just like except that, yes, sometimes it won't work out.

878
01:00:37.000 --> 01:00:40.039
That's a shame and that's a reality. That's cool. It's sad things

879
01:00:40.159 --> 01:00:44.000
end. That's not that's not nice. But it must be awful though to

880
01:00:44.079 --> 01:00:47.320
go from like a non non long
fucking hell's hard to say no no

881
01:00:47.880 --> 01:00:52.000
long distance relationship to a long distant
relationship. That's a difficult leap to make

882
01:00:52.119 --> 01:00:54.639
what isn't really what you signed up
for. Yeah, it is hard,

883
01:00:55.119 --> 01:00:58.840
but if you, if you,
if you just kind of call it quits

884
01:00:58.920 --> 01:01:02.519
now because it'll probably be hard,
isn't that worse exactly? Fully, at

885
01:01:02.559 --> 01:01:05.880
least if it ends in a year? Because he you know, fuck,

886
01:01:06.239 --> 01:01:09.000
that was another people when didn't tell
you it's all that you miss each other,

887
01:01:09.239 --> 01:01:14.880
but you message it terribly and it
worked out forever or whatever. Yeah,

888
01:01:15.000 --> 01:01:16.719
sorry, I was getting too mean
about it, but like, wouldn't

889
01:01:16.719 --> 01:01:20.760
you rather know that? I would
rather know you'd rather give it a go

890
01:01:20.800 --> 01:01:22.880
one hundred percent. I would always
rather know. Yeah, I don't live

891
01:01:22.880 --> 01:01:28.719
to get your decisions. I'm good
luck, good luck, don't don't fuck

892
01:01:28.800 --> 01:01:30.840
it up. Let us know how
it goes. Oh yeah, yeah weakly

893
01:01:30.960 --> 01:01:35.880
updates? Well, I mean glad
we'll be keeping you saying in Africa as

894
01:01:35.920 --> 01:01:39.119
well as the middle of the Atlantic
Ocean. That's nice. I mean,

895
01:01:39.199 --> 01:01:43.039
it's yeah, it's it's a reason
to come back for season four eventually,

896
01:01:43.119 --> 01:01:46.679
isn't it. I haven't finished season
three yet? No, I anyway should

897
01:01:46.719 --> 01:01:51.000
call this a day. Let's call
this a day. I'm hungry, so

898
01:01:51.360 --> 01:01:53.920
I would like another glass of wine
at home not here. Don't worry,

899
01:01:54.119 --> 01:01:58.199
I'll leave John. John's face drops
every time I write, because I'm always

900
01:01:58.199 --> 01:02:00.639
just like, get me the wine, ge me the pino gugio. Um,

901
01:02:02.559 --> 01:02:06.599
who's gonna wrap it up? I'm
gonna wrap it Okay. So you

902
01:02:06.719 --> 01:02:12.559
have been here with me at Guy
Peuzy. I'm doing this one week okay.

903
01:02:12.679 --> 01:02:15.480
No, no, it's we're gonna
we're gonna cut that and I'm gonna

904
01:02:15.519 --> 01:02:20.679
start again. Um, you've been
here on the Latch. Thank you very

905
01:02:20.800 --> 01:02:23.760
much for listening. Follow us on
Twitter at on the Latch, on Instagram

906
01:02:23.840 --> 01:02:28.400
at on the Latch Podcast, and
you can contact us by a v Curious

907
01:02:28.480 --> 01:02:31.880
Cat or by a Gmail with on
the Latch Podcast at gmail dot com.

908
01:02:32.400 --> 01:02:35.960
We will see you next time.
Bye,