WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.160 --> 00:00:05.599 Successful individuals use coaching and mentorship to help them unlock their potential. Not all 2 00:00:05.599 --> 00:00:09.560 coaches are created equal, and that's why we work with the top five percent 3 00:00:09.599 --> 00:00:13.000 of coaches at IDEMICS. Welcome to Coaches you Need, brought to you by 4 00:00:13.039 --> 00:00:20.879 IDEMS. Welcome to the first episode of Coaching Shorts by IDMX Radio. This 5 00:00:20.960 --> 00:00:28.120 brief podcast is designed to demystified coaching and help you understand what coaching is and 6 00:00:28.239 --> 00:00:32.600 how it can help you. I'm your host, Jamie, and today I'm 7 00:00:32.640 --> 00:00:39.079 here with Coach Christie. Coach Christie has been coaching since twenty eighteen. She 8 00:00:39.240 --> 00:00:46.240 has a very deep background in management, consulting and human resources and her clients 9 00:00:46.399 --> 00:00:53.079 are driven, high performers that want to make a difference. So welcome Coach 10 00:00:53.159 --> 00:00:58.520 Christie. Thank you Greens today, thank you glad to be here. And 11 00:00:58.600 --> 00:01:07.280 today we are going to take a broad look at what is coaching to help 12 00:01:07.799 --> 00:01:11.640 understand from a very macro level what it is and what it isn't and what 13 00:01:11.719 --> 00:01:18.840 are the misconceptions about coaching. So, without further ado, the first question 14 00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:25.400 is Coach Christie, can you tell us what is coaching? So when people 15 00:01:25.480 --> 00:01:30.400 come to me for coaching, they generally want to make a big change in 16 00:01:30.439 --> 00:01:34.599 their lives. They're burned out, they're doing so much for their people, 17 00:01:36.400 --> 00:01:41.439 and sometimes they're eager to start coaching and not eager to start coaching. But 18 00:01:41.560 --> 00:01:45.400 what coaching is. It's never me telling you, oh, well, you 19 00:01:45.439 --> 00:01:49.480 know why you're burned out. You're working sixteen hour days. That's why you're 20 00:01:49.480 --> 00:01:53.280 burned out. It's never my job to tell you what is going on with 21 00:01:53.319 --> 00:01:59.359 you. It's for me to ask questions for you to figure out what's going 22 00:01:59.400 --> 00:02:02.799 on with you, and you then come up the client thing comes up with 23 00:02:02.879 --> 00:02:10.000 the best solutions for you. So maybe you are working sixteen hour days and 24 00:02:10.599 --> 00:02:15.680 your first step is, you know what, I just need a ten minute 25 00:02:15.680 --> 00:02:20.080 break in the middle of the day. That's what you can do. And 26 00:02:20.120 --> 00:02:22.439 then when you get your ten minute break in the middle of the day, 27 00:02:22.479 --> 00:02:24.919 when we talk next time, it's you know what, I'm working sixteen hour 28 00:02:25.039 --> 00:02:30.400 days. That is not working. So then we work on how we work 29 00:02:30.120 --> 00:02:36.159 what you do to figure out the sixteen hour day things. So it's always 30 00:02:37.080 --> 00:02:40.240 figuring out what you need to do, and then the client taking the action, 31 00:02:40.719 --> 00:02:46.439 not a coach telling you what to do. Thank you. So it 32 00:02:46.520 --> 00:02:55.039 sounds like it's as a coach you work to help drive self awareness in people's 33 00:02:55.120 --> 00:03:02.240 lives, help them drill down on what is working and what isn't working, 34 00:03:02.840 --> 00:03:09.080 and reflect on that. So it is it accurate to say that when you 35 00:03:09.319 --> 00:03:14.199 are signing up for a coaching session and you're engaging and coaching, that it 36 00:03:14.280 --> 00:03:22.319 really is going to be a moment to help you self reflect on what's working 37 00:03:22.360 --> 00:03:27.240 and not for sure. And that was said way more succinctly than I did 38 00:03:27.319 --> 00:03:36.319 so great job doing me, Yes, exactly, And it's never really about 39 00:03:36.560 --> 00:03:43.439 me telling you what that is too. A lot of when I talk about 40 00:03:43.439 --> 00:03:47.439 coaching too, the things that I focus on are the tactical things, like 41 00:03:47.479 --> 00:03:51.199 an example that we were saying, maybe I need a fifteen minute break, 42 00:03:51.800 --> 00:03:55.479 but we often have to work on that mindset too, Why do I deserve 43 00:03:55.800 --> 00:04:00.560 a ten or fifteen minute break in the middle of the day. So it's 44 00:04:00.560 --> 00:04:03.680 it's the mindset that always goes along with the tactical things that you need to 45 00:04:03.680 --> 00:04:08.520 do, because if you do one without the other, it's not sustainable. 46 00:04:08.639 --> 00:04:14.680 You just won't work amazing. So it's driving the self awareness, the reflection 47 00:04:15.439 --> 00:04:21.800 and then to help hopefully clients then pivot how they frame what they're doing. 48 00:04:23.560 --> 00:04:26.480 Good one. Yes, again much more succinctly than I said it, but 49 00:04:26.639 --> 00:04:31.439 yes, that's it right. You know, coaching has I feel and since 50 00:04:31.839 --> 00:04:38.680 you know the past twenty years is really exploded and sometimes there's not a lot 51 00:04:38.720 --> 00:04:43.319 of clarity on what coaching is and isn't. So can you speak to some 52 00:04:43.360 --> 00:04:48.120 of the common misconceptions about coaching and what it is and what it isn't? 53 00:04:48.959 --> 00:04:55.160 Sure. One of the examples that I just hit on was the differences between 54 00:04:56.000 --> 00:05:00.560 coaching and consulting. So I can always tell when I left app send to 55 00:05:00.720 --> 00:05:03.959 consulting mode, which I do on occasion because I'm like, because I know, 56 00:05:04.480 --> 00:05:08.720 well, I think that I know, I know what their problem is. 57 00:05:08.720 --> 00:05:12.160 So if they will with the example before I'm working sixteen hour days, 58 00:05:12.639 --> 00:05:17.800 how could you maybe work fourteen hour days? If I start telling them or 59 00:05:17.800 --> 00:05:23.480 even suggesting what somebody might do, they didn't come up with that on their 60 00:05:23.480 --> 00:05:26.839 own. That's me telling them. That's me being a consultant in thinking that 61 00:05:26.920 --> 00:05:30.480 I know best. One of the things that I typically tell people when I 62 00:05:30.519 --> 00:05:33.920 talk to them first, it's like, I don't know you best, I 63 00:05:33.959 --> 00:05:36.680 don't know your company best, I don't know your roles best, I don't 64 00:05:36.720 --> 00:05:41.360 know your family dynamics. Therefore you're the ones that have to come up with 65 00:05:41.560 --> 00:05:46.480 the solution that's best for you, not me. So I always get a 66 00:05:46.560 --> 00:05:50.399 nice little nudge if I'm trying to consult, because it's never what the person 67 00:05:50.480 --> 00:05:56.560 designs and they don't want to do it. So, yeah, that's very 68 00:05:56.600 --> 00:06:00.639 that's quite interesting. So as a coach, then you're not telling people what 69 00:06:00.680 --> 00:06:04.439 to do. You're just helping them figure out what are the best solutions for 70 00:06:04.560 --> 00:06:12.720 them based on their situation and who they are. Coach is not there to 71 00:06:12.759 --> 00:06:19.879 tell you to do something particular correct exactly again, very succinctly, Yes, 72 00:06:20.040 --> 00:06:25.920 take to take a certain action basically, which is maybe in a way how 73 00:06:25.920 --> 00:06:30.279 it differs from sports coaching, right because your sports coaches, right, which 74 00:06:30.319 --> 00:06:33.040 we're all familiar with, many people grew up, you know, taking doing 75 00:06:33.120 --> 00:06:36.519 sports where the coach tells you, you know, if you want to get 76 00:06:36.560 --> 00:06:41.680 better, this is what you need to do every day. But coaching for 77 00:06:41.800 --> 00:06:47.879 adults or for young professionals look looks different in that regard because it's really about 78 00:06:47.920 --> 00:06:53.639 helping people understand for them, what's the best solution to get them where they 79 00:06:53.680 --> 00:06:58.680 want to go correct, and it's it's a little bit more holistic too. 80 00:06:58.879 --> 00:07:00.680 You know the sports coach, which is if you want to make sure that 81 00:07:00.680 --> 00:07:05.800 you're running a marathon or you're doing a specific sport, they're very They might 82 00:07:05.879 --> 00:07:10.639 tell you what to eat, what not to eat, when to wake up, 83 00:07:10.759 --> 00:07:15.800 but it's always for that ultimate goal. Usually coaching is more holistic if 84 00:07:15.839 --> 00:07:23.120 we know we get your home life in a better, more balanced way that 85 00:07:23.199 --> 00:07:26.199 aligns with who you are, that's going to help you with work. So 86 00:07:26.240 --> 00:07:30.720 it's a little bit more holistic instead of just focused on this one area. 87 00:07:30.519 --> 00:07:36.439 Amazing, amazing. I'm as follow up. You know one question that an 88 00:07:36.480 --> 00:07:41.480 idea mix that we get quite often, and I'm sure you as a coach 89 00:07:41.560 --> 00:07:46.600 get quite often, is what is the difference between coaching and therapy? Sure, 90 00:07:47.279 --> 00:07:53.800 so Alex blame it. Let me give an example and then I'll explain 91 00:07:53.839 --> 00:07:58.879 it too. So let's say I'm in a session with somebody and we'll take 92 00:07:58.920 --> 00:08:03.959 the person that's working six hours sixteen hour days and they're exhausted, and I 93 00:08:05.079 --> 00:08:11.680 might ask them the question why do you think you're working sixteen hour days? 94 00:08:13.519 --> 00:08:20.040 And they really stop and they think they're like, oh my goodness. I've 95 00:08:20.079 --> 00:08:28.759 worked since I was twelve. I was always taught that I need to work. 96 00:08:28.480 --> 00:08:33.200 That even if I'm sitting down at the house and my parents come home, 97 00:08:33.440 --> 00:08:37.360 I need to get up and I need to hustle because I can't rest 98 00:08:37.559 --> 00:08:43.240 until I've already worked. And when somebody has that revelation, they're going through 99 00:08:43.279 --> 00:08:48.919 a lot of past memories. As a therapist. Your therapist is going to 100 00:08:48.039 --> 00:08:52.360 say, let's talk about that. How did that make you feel when you 101 00:08:52.440 --> 00:09:01.720 were younger, How has that influenced who you've become as a coach. I'm 102 00:09:01.759 --> 00:09:07.080 going to say, that's tremendous insight. That's great that you've come to that 103 00:09:07.200 --> 00:09:13.679 realization. That's amazing work knowing that this is based on how you were raised 104 00:09:16.080 --> 00:09:18.200 and may or may not be serving you now. How do you want to 105 00:09:18.240 --> 00:09:24.000 go forward with that knowledge? And they can say I'm going to keep on 106 00:09:24.080 --> 00:09:28.519 doing this because it's my goal to retire by the time i'm fifty. Great, 107 00:09:28.919 --> 00:09:33.919 or that doesn't serve me anymore. I want to do something else. 108 00:09:33.519 --> 00:09:39.639 But that's what we do. We don't get into what happened with your parents, 109 00:09:39.799 --> 00:09:43.159 what happened when you were growing up. We say, great information. 110 00:09:43.200 --> 00:09:48.600 Now we forward the action, So again, you know, it's a really 111 00:09:50.679 --> 00:09:54.919 I think what I'm hearing is you may recognize that there is something that you 112 00:09:56.039 --> 00:10:01.120 do because of how what you were told old in your past, But really 113 00:10:01.279 --> 00:10:07.000 coaching is is that recognition, that gaining that self awareness about what that is, 114 00:10:07.320 --> 00:10:13.519 but then having a forward looking approach to you know, how okay, 115 00:10:13.799 --> 00:10:18.159 you know? Is that still serving you for where you want to go? 116 00:10:18.720 --> 00:10:22.399 And if not, then how can we change? How can you change that? 117 00:10:24.399 --> 00:10:28.519 Correct? Again, much more sucinctly, Yes, that's it amazing, 118 00:10:28.639 --> 00:10:31.399 amazing, but I mean it's really I think one of the key differences is 119 00:10:31.759 --> 00:10:35.879 even if you may look back at the past, that one of the sort 120 00:10:35.879 --> 00:10:43.080 of differentiators between coaching and therapy is therapy really unpacks the past, whereas with 121 00:10:43.200 --> 00:10:48.279 coaching, you are moving forward. So it's really a forward looking approach and 122 00:10:48.360 --> 00:10:52.039 focus on sort of where where do you want to go? Rather than how 123 00:10:52.039 --> 00:10:56.399 did you know? How did you get here? Correct? And it's non 124 00:10:56.480 --> 00:11:01.960 uncommon. I have I Pad and have clients right now that are working with 125 00:11:03.039 --> 00:11:07.159 therapists and they're working with coaches, and even though they might bring us the 126 00:11:07.240 --> 00:11:13.000 same issue, they know that it's going to be handled differently because it's resolving 127 00:11:13.039 --> 00:11:16.960 any trauma in order to help you make that forward progress. And it's not 128 00:11:18.000 --> 00:11:20.519 in common for those to go hand in hand because we do not get into 129 00:11:20.559 --> 00:11:24.679 each other's lens. They're different work. So do you ever have moments then 130 00:11:24.960 --> 00:11:31.799 where you're working with a client and you have to say that is something that 131 00:11:31.840 --> 00:11:39.600 you should unpack with your therapist. I do, and sometimes I say this 132 00:11:39.720 --> 00:11:46.000 is a therapy question. You need to you probably need to figure this out 133 00:11:46.759 --> 00:11:50.879 because I think it is influencing what you're doing. Now, let's talk about 134 00:11:50.879 --> 00:11:54.840 what we want to go forward because it's a version of that. Yes, 135 00:11:54.240 --> 00:12:01.799 yeah, amazing, amazing, Thank you. One final question to wrap up 136 00:12:01.799 --> 00:12:07.039 our coach shorts a day. You know, I think I find the idea 137 00:12:07.080 --> 00:12:13.360 mixed coaches are some amazing people who are very forward looking and are thinking about 138 00:12:15.039 --> 00:12:20.759 I think are much much more reflective than I would say I am specifically, 139 00:12:22.399 --> 00:12:28.879 And so you know, I'm always curious who the coaches find inspiration and how, 140 00:12:30.000 --> 00:12:33.240 you know, who do they learn from in order to continue evolving their 141 00:12:33.320 --> 00:12:43.919 coaching practices and help them advance as well. One of my biggest influencers is 142 00:12:43.960 --> 00:12:48.399 Brene Brown, and anyone that's talked to me for more than five minutes, 143 00:12:48.399 --> 00:12:52.759 we'll probably know that. Um. What I really like. The example that 144 00:12:52.759 --> 00:12:56.960 I was using about the work in working sixteen hour days is one of her 145 00:12:58.039 --> 00:13:05.159 mantras in the Gifts of Imperfection, and in part it is I'm letting go 146 00:13:05.519 --> 00:13:09.720 of productivity as self worth. I have it in a bulletin board so that 147 00:13:09.759 --> 00:13:16.200 I can see it often because she's pared down so much of the hustle culture 148 00:13:16.840 --> 00:13:20.039 into really those beliefs that we need to have so that we're not doing that. 149 00:13:20.639 --> 00:13:26.480 So she twists and turns that about sixteen different ways in her books, 150 00:13:26.840 --> 00:13:31.879 how she's brought it to leaders, and how she unpacks that in her podcast 151 00:13:31.919 --> 00:13:35.799 as well. So I'm always thinking about things differently and getting it supposed to 152 00:13:35.799 --> 00:13:41.679 different authors when I hear her talk. So that's amazing. Thank you so 153 00:13:41.759 --> 00:13:48.200 much coach Christie for being here today. We appreciate value your insights, and 154 00:13:48.559 --> 00:13:52.799 thank you for being our first guest as well on today's coaching short I'm so 155 00:13:52.879 --> 00:13:58.399 excited. I appreciate it, Jamie. Thank you so much. Thanks for 156 00:13:58.440 --> 00:14:01.879 listening. Please subscribe h wherever you listen and leave us a review. Find 157 00:14:01.919 --> 00:14:07.840 your ideal coach at www dot vidmx dot com. Special thanks to our producer 158 00:14:07.919 --> 00:14:11.240 Martin Luski and singer songwriter Doug Allen.