The Night Shift is a real play D and D video and podcast series for
mature audiences. Content warnings can be found in the episode descriptions Last Home on
the Night Shift. Hey, Pen, I'm gonna come with us to Cornelian
Islands. Go get some revenge on the dickhead boss of yours. Yes,
okay, dude, I can't scream together gold My souls already sold. Swim
you trapped to your spell. I wish you well, never creats your own
your streets. You do better to retreat if you want it done right,
don't huh a night shift? You guys rapped on the deck tentacles sort of
uh towering over the shift. I mean, this thing appears to be very
are you very large? Um? One tentacle already wrapped around the stern the
back of the ship and pulling downward. So as you're standing there, the
deck starts to tilt. Everybody make an athletics or acrobatics check to start were
heat up? Boys? Is that your days? Where's that? Oh shit?
I just lost it? Oh yeah, athletics or acrobatics. Lets either
one? Just tell me which I can figure out. Not twenty baby,
All right, let's start with Attilius. Then actually, let's go to Attilius
last in case somebody else has a has a fungled thing. Let me start
thirteen thirteen. Which one is you roll? Uh acrobatics, all right,
so thirteen the stern pulled down into the water, and think what you can
see is like, it's not like the back of it's in the water yet
or anything, but you can see directly down and see where the water meets
the ship, which is not usually a good thing. Right, Um,
you try to steady yourself instead you end up kind of on your when you're
on your butt, on your on your hamstring, if you will, um
sliding down the ship. Fourteen fourteen athletics. Let's say, let's say Tom,
given his very and I'm yes, very strong out of this point,
given his proclivities he uh he he loves acrobatics, loves doing flips and and
wants to pull off a flip and forgets for a moment that he has been
doing opium for four dation. Yeah, so what you attempt to do is
when the ship gets unleveled, you attempt to jump to a flip and land
with your feet on the mast. Okay, hell yeah, oh yeah,
And What happens instead is you you pull off I would call it eighty percent
of that. Your heels hit the mast, slip and your back. It's
that poll and then you start rolling down the deck. Let's uh roll one
day foreign damage. Boom, alright, here we go. I went for
it. Two two damage, two damage. I mean land on the mast.
It's a round object. It's tough. You had you had gastics competition,
you would have had a high ceiling on that score. Yeah. Uh,
I rolled a twelve for athletics. Twelve for athletics. So I think
for your part, you know you're not going to acrobatic your way out of
this one. You're not trying to keep your balance. You immediately start looking
for something to ground one too. You grab a rope and it just isn't
connected in anything, So you just start sliding down the deck while holding one
of this rope. You're gonnat tempt to sort of hold yourself in place,
and instead it's just as far as you can tell, I'm not connected.
So you're just going down the deck. Attilius, on the other hand,
with a natural twenty attilius up, I'm not I don't want to say it.
I don't. Yeah, I don't want to say you can do anything
here, but what do you want? Tell about what you want to do,
and we'll figure out what's fair. I can attack right now, like
I can just I can do whatever, or is just as like I'm setting
myself up and putting myself in a position to attack. Yeah, let me
give you some options. So I don't I think you could attack attack Let's
say, probably not in a direct way, like I'm not sure you could
pull a weapon, make your way all the way to crack and attack it.
Um, but you could use like you could direct a crate to fall
into its mouth or something like that. Um. You could also help a
friend with that twenty and kind of keep them from sliding. Or you could
like very firmly secure yourself so that you don't have to make checks in the
future. So like the example there, you could grab a rope tied around
your waist, secure it on the other end, and then you're not gonna
have to make this sort of check in the future. Is there a crow's
nest? Yeah, definitely, definitely there is. So I can't wait to
see where this goes. So I I spring forward to the side of the
ship that has the tentacle wrapped on is being pulled down, and I noticed
there's a crow's nest, so I kind of leap forward onto the mast of
the crow's crow's nest is on and sprint upward, do like a spider man
barrel flip into the crow's nest and position myself ready for battle. Love that.
Um. Let's say it's a crow's nest. So they usually have like
a harness or something up there, because you don't want somebody to fall from
a crow's nest. Um. And it's the most delicate position on the ship,
so you're able to kind of put that thing on super quickly. Yes,
and so now you're an only in the highest point and and have a
good vantage point. You're also firmly secure in this crow's nest. Yeah yeah,
yeah yeah. The only thing to keep in mind is like you're getting
slung left or right or back to for pretty hard um, which will unstable
you a little bit. Okay, let's all roll initiative. Ye, cracking
is a twenty four pangs flare, I tellias, are you using the snail
flail? What does that do again? So the snail flail which you just
got um is a melee weapon, which wouldn't be much use from where you're
at obviously, um, but it makes you go last in initiative order.
But you get a plus two to any attack, which means, uh,
when you roll a die twenty two hit you get plus two to that,
and when you roll a damage you get a plus two to that. No,
but it's because it's a melee weapon, uh, so I wrote,
So it probably not would be though, so so I rode uh twelve,
well fourteen in minus two so twelve, Yeah, what's everybody else at?
Six? Twenty modified twenty natural? Oh here we go, um all right,
sorry, yeah, twenty natural for uh for Timbo, Timbo's initiative six
for Castrol, modified twelve for me, modified twelve for Attilius the Haunted,
modified twenty, and I'm modified twenty uh for tom Bombo. All right,
So Castals was a six untiliss was a twelve. Gather two were on twenties.
But Timbos isn't natural, but I means Timbo goes first because Timbo had
a natural twenty fast acting the crack fast acting the crack. God, what
a reference Madden commercial tough acting to Yeah, yeah, all right Uh,
but he rolled high timbo. Yeah, you're back sliding down this deck holding
onto a rope. What do you want to do? So I'm on my
back sliding, Let's say you're sliding. There's whether you're on your back or
your stomach or whatever else, but you're holding onto a rope. So well,
I'll go on my back if I'm not, if I'm not on my
feet. Uh. But I'm signing towards the tentacle though, right, Yeah,
so I think of it is like the whole back of the ship is
tilting and there's a tentacle pulling that down that I'm signing towards. Correct.
Yeah, so I just want to keep sliding. I want to go yeah
all right, yeah, I want I want to keep Uh. I want
to build momentum up sliding towards it and uh and impale it with a sword.
But while sliding, I want to I want to rip my shirt open
and reveal my crocodile tis necklace and enter a rage. Mighty oh fighting on
the ship. I'm gonna go to a c rage and sorry, yeah,
and I died, take out, take out, missedweaver and uh, and
I just want to impale uh the tentacle At any point, do you like
trying to write yourself and jump or you just sliding down till you get to
the tentacle and slashing? Um, how fast am I sliding? I mean?
Is it a pretty brisk slide? Uh? Yeah, I mean I
probably hard to hard for ust vocalized, but yeah, yeah, let's say
it's like it feels a little out of control, okay, then pretty quick.
Yeah yeah, so i'd I would want to try to stabilize myself,
get my feet planted on something, and and then like use that to kind
of springboard into the tentacle. Okay, all right, let's uh, I
don't think we're even gonna do a check on that. You've already done a
check in and got a natural twenty, So in my opinion, you just
do that. At some point You just kind of like hit a secure crate
or something and that lets you like catch your feet and then you run and
jump to stab. So roll to hit the role is a nineteen plus six
on the mister Weaver is a twenty five idle hit no barbarian um. Okay,
so that's uh, that was the two handed sword attack there as well,
So that'll be a D ten plus five eight and I'm raging. So
it's actually plus seven, So fifteen fifteen damage, fifteen points of damage and
that's slashing. That is slashing damage. Yes, sounds good. Let's go,
dude, let's go. All right, So you hacking slash at this
tentacle. I think you cut? How are you standing? Are you standing
on the that was kind of plunging into the tentacle? Yeah, so I
think he's He's like, yeah, kind of up to the hilt on that
tentacle and standing on it. That would stop my momentum, would be like
stopping on the tentacle as I'm like, I used the word undulating before,
but that's what's happening. It's undulating beneath him. You're cracking it. Suckers,
uh crack, you have suckers as far as I'm aware. Let's say,
yes, this one does. Did you scut oil? It's a great
question and one that you might find out in this final m definite possibility.
Who's next natural joining or no cracking? Well? Yeah, I was modifizing
you right, Okay, So what's gonna happen is one of these tentacles is
gonna rise up in the air, and I think probably Timbo has the best
view of this. Um, A tentacle, one that has not already wrapped
its way around the ship, appears out of the water and just climbs and
climbs and climbs into the air and then falls across the boat. Heavy.
Um, what's gonna happen is I think really the two of you, Kestrel
and Tom Bombo are the ones that are kind of beneath it. Um.
Oh, it hits hard all right, um. And I think as you
look around, you can see there's like maybe eight or nine visible tentacles right
now, most of which are just kind of in the air or slicing through
the water. One around the boat, one that just fell on top of
the boat, got up walk is this thing's head all right under the ship?
So uh, half lanes have the lucky traits. And so I think
that like, I'm just the perfect size to hide within a sucker as it
comes down, so it makes like a little air bubble over me and I
don't get hurt at all. Let's think about it. Think about it.
Oh shocks, Um, both of them hit Crocky, I mean fourteen points
of damage to the both of you. Ouch. Oh, Tom, that
takes you down. I'm done because I take the two pounds of damage for
tripping and my heroin out of state. Oh my god, I'm just sucking
falling. Wow, lifeless bodies all over the boat. Oh no, okay,
Um, Tom, I think you just get pinned under this thing as
it falls, So you're not falling anymore. Um, you're just stuck underneath
this. I'm stuck on one of the stuckers. Sure, why not,
I'm sucking a sucker? Sure all right, Um and Castrol you're not.
But it wayal Asia is the way to think of it. It hits your
heart. Yeah, damn. Who is next? Is that? Me?
Would have been Tom? Tom? Tom? Make it that' save that said
twelve. Let's go all right, all right, something good happening. Um,
we're gonna stick Lucious right here in the order. And oh my god,
he's playing Lucius on the top deck has arranged a bunch of the pirates
who have crossbows and they all let loose into the um the tentacle that is
just landed in the middle of the boat. Um, we're gonna say he's
trying to save one of his best customers. We're gonna say ten percent of
the bolt's miss, which means of them hit. Um, none of them
hit either of you, which even better. Um. And I think this
this tentacle sort of like shrinks back a little bit, stops trying to sink
the boat and shrinks back. So tom, uh, I think you're back
to sliding down the deck at this point, Umi unconscious at this time unconscious?
Yeah? Okay, is there a damage number that those bolts? Uh
deal? All right? Yeah, great question. Yeah, let's do let's
do forty points of damage? Nice? What's pin doing? Must be a
lot of them? Oh pins in the bottom deck. He's sick. And
Bill, Hey, what a racket? Yeah, Bills, Well where's bill?
Fills with? Fills with second Carapan? I don't think you got one
bell up here? Yeah, there's no nest. No, there's no neck
to throw at. What are we gonna do here? He's gonna throw the
knife once? Yeah? Yeah, he took his only weapon they could even
help. All right, I tell you us, what are we doing?
Where is the second tentacle? Like? Is it behind me? Up in
the crow's nest? Like? Is it? Yeah? I would say it
kind of fell down kind of right behind that crow's nest and mask. Okay,
now it's sort of sliding off the boat sort of withdrawing, okay,
with a bunch of bolts in it. All right, I want to turn
my attention to the to the tentacle that's trying to pull the ship down.
I want to I want to leap off of the crow's nest, take off
the horness a leap off the crow's nest, down onto the tentacle, bounce
off backflip in the air, and release eldritch blast one more time. You
think is going to carry Okay, let me make sure make sure our expectations
match. Here. What you're doing is jumping off of the crow's newt like
it's called thirty feet here. Yeah, coming down like Batman on this thing.
Harness down, boy, it's gonna be great or dragon board warlock off
the crows helping this scenario. I mean not to like fly fly, but
not like slow them down like like Batman. Yeah maybe yeah, kind of
like the wings on the Spider Man like it was kind of like a slider
kind of thing. I'll allow it down. Um, and then you want
to land on the tentacle like because its child's trampling. Yes, yes,
and then Eldritch blasted yes that last point. Just so I'm clear, it's
just for style points. You're not trying to accomplish anything with the back flip.
No, no style points. Maybe wants to really impress all those guys
that cross get it. I tell you is feeling great, he's feeling he's
been meditating. Maybe maybe i'snu some opium and for the battle has on opium
bens for four days. But also maybe we don't know. Okay, let's
start with an acrobatics check. Okay, and I'll tell you well, this
one needs to be on point. Yeah, big money, big money,
noamis seventeen well minus two fifteen minus two see my battle real last microback.
I like to went balls to the wall in this check. Hey man,
go bigger, go home. Yeah, well you might have to go begger,
go to the hospital. Yeah, um um, okay, So with
a fifteen given given the difficulty of this particular maneuver um, you dive off
swan, dive your wings slowly, a little bit, you land, and
you like bind down to do uh to accomplish a backlip, and when you
spring back up, the slipperiness of this tentacle, just your feet just scoop
out from under your and you just land on your back and the tentacle sort
of move at the last minute, just kind of threw your game off.
So you find yourself kind of grabbing on to the top of it, hanging
on. So now you would like the Elder's blast, you can just do
that a little further away, thank you? All right, Okay, roll
up attack there. Yeah I didn't. Yeah, what was it? Six?
What's plus plus five? Him? Just an eleven? You miss?
So I think just the way the tentacles moving you you sort of pointed to
your left further down the tentacle, and then it moves the last minute and
you fire it off in me here. Yeah, I had good intentions.
People. Oh it's a great dam if if if um if he like whole
if he puts the vampire dagger in my hand and swings my limp hand had
the monster do I get those health point back. Maybe he's just like,
we get it. Bernie's are talking out. He's just like this like a
little yeah, we get it. Bernie should try it. Yeah, I
don't know, idea figure it out when I get there. I guess it
Wasn't I like that You're asking me as if this is something I've already contemplated,
Like I have no idea. Man, maybe we'll figure that out when
we get there. Geez, holy hell um okay, kestrel Okay, So
explain to me what the tentacles look like again? Now? Um? So
the one that's like currently slithering off of you is riddled with crossbow bolts and
it's sort of large, uh, kind of dark reddish, think like an
octopus tentacle at the little suction cups all over it and you're kind of popping
off of the wood. Um as far as like they're um, as far
as their width, think like six feet wide? Yeah? Um? Position
meaning what exactly? So like how many tentacles are around the ship or like
flailing around the ship? Um, you guys can see eight or nine?
Okay? Are any of them closed together? Sense where this is going?
Let's say, yeah, yeah, truls, okay, sure, how many?
I want to find out where this is going? So? Yeah,
I feel like she bits me on the She's like, yeah, environment,
Um, let's say there's there's two different sets where you can find a pair
that's very close together. Okay, Um, So I run up to the
set that's closest to me, and um, I elongate my immovable rod and
I slam it on top of the pair to lock them in place so they're
not flailing anywhere. The first time we've used the immovable rod to be immovable.
Gramastics move us. The elongate used. The elongate thing is my favorite
thing? Who literally down? Do you like that? Um? And now
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love you welcome the Airn House Cookball turn them on up. Next we have
the night Shift perennial losers. You know, their legs have gotten stronger,
their hearts have grown three times the size, and they appear to be okay.
Well, let's take a little break, ladies and gentlemen, and we'll
be back in five. Yeahs, feel a little stronger since the last time
we leveled up, even though it's been a little while. Wow. Wow,
hey Bill, great job out there, man, you really uh well,
I know you didn't get on base today, but your effort was astounding.
Great job, Bill. People keep telling me that I was I was,
I was never gonna get to third base, and I um, I
didn't. How can you miss that ball? I can't it right to you?
I mean, right, gee, I might as well use you as
the ball next. To be fair, I'm about the size of the ball
and you kicked it. Next time you climb up on atilius? Is that
legal? We look in the room. Just pour me a drink, okay,
whatever, Well, I'm so angry right now, my good friends over
at rallycap the liberty of brewing us a beer named after something that will never
truly understand, and that is Victory Formation. And there's some assessment to be
some sort of runic symbols of some sort from these cans. Well, yes,
uh, the good news is a hazy i PA eight percent alcohol by
a volume. Victory Formation is very tasty, even though we'll never really understand
what it's like. Hey, it's on the fifteen to zero. Okay,
y'all, it's free. They still have a chance. It is for sure.
It's a perfect sports brew. Yes, yeah, quenches the first I
reckon when I crank out my dingers I can just trot around the base path
and watch it with the dingers. This is the family sport. We don't
want to fucking love American football. I get it. I can read the
room just football man. Fuck yeah, this is actually great. Something happened.
It's all bumpa over there. Yeah, delicious beer. Pelican Craft Brands
distributes this throughout the Greater Louisiana area. Always a fan of bringing delicious craft
beer to the people. To take notes of citrus. It's quite delicious.
Various stute over there. Only she worked on her kickball skills like she's been
working on her beers. Tom's fault. He missed the ball, messed the
ball. I think you know how the game works. Why would you be
kicking into me anyway? Alright, get your asses back on the field.
Let's minish. Okay, Let's let's make a roll slight of hand at advantage.
I'm not sure exactly what this should require, Okay, but let's go
slide of hand at advantage all right, M twelve and fourteen, uh and
plus slight of hand sage sixteen and fourteen sixteen sixteen. Okay, So you
guys watch as um it sort of looks like Cashtroll has Walter damn mind because
she gets up, sprints sort of sideways on this ship while like leaning heavily
one way so she can keep her feet, and dives off of the boat.
As she dives, she sort of puts this this immovable rode out in
front of her and it starts to lengthen, and then she lands between two
of these tentacles that are kind of curling, and you see her like pull
down and as it sort of pulls into the flesh, she hits the button.
It locks, and now those tentacles are just kind of stuck where they're
at, So it's so it's kind of hanging there two tentacles, which is
something. Well, so where where am i exactly off the side of the
boat? Okay, good, hanging from a road. So as my bonus
action, I want to jump into the water. Didn't expect that? Yeah,
okay, easy enough. Just let go of the rock. Yeah yeah,
done, you're swimming. Boy, this feels I feel like I'm missing
something, But go ahead. Some fan art of Chestral and the two Tentacles
stop. Yes, all right? Listener fan art time? Oh god,
don't we do need to start getting our listeners? To create some fan art
for us. I mean, if anybody out there's any night shift Rule thirty
four, then we don't actually exist yet. That's how that's how you get
that. That's how you get approved into real Internet existence. All right,
maybe that's ticular talk spectacular, but whatever or I might Where is uh Tom
Bombo sliding down the deck of the ship so everyone else was in a controlled
slid sort of on their back. Yeah, he's just head kind of banging
like, but he would be towards right. That's because I'm I'm on the
lower tentacle, so he's coming towards me, yes, at a rapid pace,
at a rapid clip. Yeah, like on this turn, can I
get where I? Could I get where I need to be to like catch
them? Yeah, let's say, sir, all right, so I,
uh, I sheathed my sword, I positioned myself based on where where he's
coming down the plinko board of the death of the ship. Uh, and
uh already myself to catch him. Create here a mask there it gets caught
in a rope here, but my my intense is to is to catch him
and then with him safely in my arms. Well, we'll determine that but
go ahead, Well, I need to know if I have my arms where
I do the next I do you want to say? At this exact moment,
Pen opens the door and looks her down the deck of the ship and
sees you bouncing, And that is the first time that Pen understands what Piniestries
is going to do. They're gonna make something called a pinball machine, all
right, or inspiration dice. We'll talk about it's worthless. We'll talk about
the legalities of like patents and everything later, because you know, I obviously
played a huge role in the creation of this. So we'll get there when
we get there. Alright, Um, athletics check is what you're going for,
like diving and catching something. That's yeah, that's good because I'm raging
and I get an advantage on well, that's on strength checks. So athletics
is a little bit. Athletics is a strength based check. So you're good,
okay, So that even if it does get an advantage on yeah,
I think it's supposed to apply to like saving throws, but in this case,
I think it makes a ton of sense. I could be wrong.
There could be any skill check. You gain advantage on strength checks and saving
throw. All right, dude, cheap up. I was give it to
them either way. Pal aggressive right there with that move, all right,
so twenty two twenty two do it? Yeah, I think you, um,
you sort of run along this this tentacle leap, and I think it's
one of those things where you sort of grab him from from off the deck
and roll and sort of tuck him, tuck his head under your arm or
something to protect him. Um you land. I think right by the railing
you can kind of grab onto the railing on the side of the ship with
uh, with Tom secure under one arm. Yeah, well, I don't
want to be under an arm. I wanted him to be like cradling.
I've got so unconscious. You don't get a vote. I'm now sitting on
the deck of the ship there like and I've got him. I've got him
like like a like like in a baby born here and my heads against his
chest to reach into my pocket and I pull out this is a real romance
story. I pull out a jar of total jelly. I've had it the
whole time. Wow, right here on one turtle jelly jar. I've never
crossed the it out because I never used it. I kept the secret kept
it safe, and so with about ninety eight percent of it, I pour
it down his throat so he consumes it like he's supposed to take my finger.
I take my finger. I wiped that right under his nose, just
like just right under, almost spent water all over the sixpen. You you
saved me. I caught your mate. I want to give him a little
kiss in the cheeks. We got. We gotta take out this cracking.
O. Thank you so much. I'm ready to go. Yeah, you
gought your crack. Now, let's defeat the cracking. I'm how much I'll
take it back from points? All right, there you go process. He's
got five hit points. Wow, he's feeling it. He's on a turtle
jelly high. Yeah. Oh yeah, we're back. Dude, Damn,
I can't believe it's been holding that me, this secret. Keep it for
the exact right, all right, crackings turn um, let's see. I
think what we'll do is uh it uh. One of these tentacles swiped sort
of horizontally along that top deck, and it wraps up like four of the
pirates cent and then hurls them sixty feet into the water, just grabs them
in like a big sweeping motion and then flings them to the direct wow.
Um, and then it is going to uh. You see its head come
out of the water for the first time, and it's I would say closest
to Tom and timdo the stern of the ship. Um behind that tentacle,
probably another thirty feet. It's horned head sort of rises out of the ocean.
It's got horns on top, horns sort of facing the bottom of its
cheeks. UM. Very hard looking creature like armored face rises out of the
water. And then the clouds above you start to darken and turn gray and
then black, and then lightning starts raining from the sky. What what are
we supposed to run? Everyone makes dexterity saving throws. I've envisioning that cracking
from clash at the site. It's the good one, nothing like the original
claimation one mm hm the Harry housing. What are we rolling for? What
is this for dexterity saving? I mean, of course turtle jelly dub that's
the twenty three. It's a modified seven feet yeah, modified seven for me,
modified seven same oh wow, fourteen um all right for my modified seven
pezzs lenges in the water. I don't know if that changes in the Yeah,
so so mm hmm, what can still get struck by electricity? That's
what I'm trying to think, electricity. But is the ocean has a work
in the ocean, Like, what's the distance on how far water electricity gets?
I'm not sure. Um let's say that you're exempted nothing strikes the water
near you, because I just don't feel like dealing with that, um attilius.
The bad news of the bad news bad news. Okay, you get
hit by lightning, like a direct strike, and now you can enter the
speed force. Yes, yes, Now you're like the flash in the sense
that one time the flash died and you were now dead. Yeah, you're
gonna take eleven points of damage. All right, Yeah, you're all right.
You're looking roth, but you're a right. Yeah you guys, hear
Lucius behind your goal. Oh it's a baby, it's a baby. Crack
in. We take it, guys, baby, Yeah, that's what's small.
We could take this one. Come on, I don't understand shoot its
face or its arms. Yeah, you know, it's face or it's arms.
Just so it's sort of like anything else. You're just killing all of
this. My first you know rodeo for cracking or whatever. What if I
called rodeos or I might let's do this tom Bombo. So I'm still in
until you or I'm still in um, still in my arms filling Timbo's arms
and so like I said, I am going to give him a little smooch
in the cheeks. Thank you brother, go fuck that cracking. The cansto
is really two cast um heroism, so on a bravery um the plus four
hp thing, ye, you might be something else about it too, and
then um with a bonus action, I am going to give him a little
bardic inspiration as well. Yeah there are right there, and uh then I
am going to hop down out of his arms. And the boats still like
vertical us right or I wouldn't call it a vertical, but like ca and
where the front of the back is in the wall, you're at the very
back at the back of the very back. Okay, So then there's probably
like you know, like a deck, little stairs, middle part then deck.
Right, So like if it were like this trying to crest like those
stairs. You know what I'm saying, I'm trying to explain it. Um
some trying to do and we'll figure it out. I'm just trying to get
you a little bit of high ground, uh like, because the middle of
the ship sits lower than the than the back, right. Yeah. Yeah,
So if it's like this, it's been tilted like this trying to climb
up here. You know what I'm saying. Oh, I think the audio
listener is gonna be very confused. Stairs that are now angled at a flat
plane basically because the boat's been Yeah, so let's say probably the main way
roll perception real quick. We'll take your action. I'm gonna like grab rope
and cut one counterweight. Zoomer, you're gonna roll perception real quick. That
is a too many drugs. That's a eighty all right, So no counterweight.
But you do see a series of ropes that appear to be anchored to
the other side of the ship somewhere that you could use to kind of stable
yourself or like almost like an opposite of repel. Yeah yeah, okay,
So I guess we'll just start to climb up there. Okay, I think
that's gonna take all your movement. Yeah, anything else you want to do?
No, My bonus action was the bartic inspiration Lucious and the pirates.
Um, I think lucious and the pirates rearm their crossbows and fire for the
face of this little little little baby crack cracking. Uh huh, little baby
cracking the bolts. Miss. Okay, but even if it's technically like grappled
with the tentacles, yeah, because they're shooting for its face. All right,
But I but I appreciate you making the argument tentacles. If they were
shooting for the tentacle, I'd totally give it to you. They shoot,
they're shooting for the face. Um so eight damage, mm hmm, not
a ton no, but you see a couple of bolts sticking in its face
and it kind of snarls and chicks its head. Tillia, let's go haunted
one. He's less haunted now, thank you. How far how far away
is the is the face of the cracking from the boat? About thirty feet?
I'm going to eldritch blast this bitch in the face. Okay, where
are you at You're at the back of the boat still. Yeah, you
know, he jumped down. He jumped down. He's like right by,
he's kind of right by. Yeah, you're like right by them. Yeah,
because you landed on your you're like on the up hold on to it,
so actually you could probably be a little closer to its face like as
that, because you're on that tentnacle. You're probably twenty twenty five feet away.
Okay, um, okay, roll to hit going with the paint m
hm nice I think, uh fuck that would be a three three plus five
is eight? Yep math um, yeah, once again the ship on fire,
ready, ready, steady, and then the technical moves and you fire
off into the air and all you hear is Luci's go. That guy can't
even at all fair enough Jesus getting roasted? Yeah, um, all right,
gas Roll, what the hell are you doing? Wait? Is spell
attack bonus? Spellcast modifier? Uh? It different? Yeah it is?
Well, I'm I'm wondered. So heroisms Actually he gets HP plus my spell
cat like whatever my spellcast modifier is? Yes? Well, so like your
modifier is four? Your spell attack six? Okay, okay, it is
four? Okay, all right, gas Roll? What are we What are
we doing here? Because I've been curious for a whole turn now okay,
um, well I'm I'm swimming below the ship mhm um, and can you
tell me what I see below? The ship because I'm assuming is it like
a giant octopus where all of its tentacles are kind of wrapped around the ship
and failing or make a perception checks won't be your action. Okay, Remember
I had dark vision and the sea is dark. If you ever tell me
that again on my throat more than she dark vision? Alright, alright,
some strong ass dark vision, strong ass dark vision right there? All right,
Yeah, I think you can determine a few things. One, there
are ten tentacles on this thing him. Okay. Um, the body,
if you will, of this creature is sort of underneath the ship, not
really like pressed up against it. There there's a little bit space betwe the
bottom bottom of the ship in it, but that's kind of how it's aligned.
And then its head is um, thirty feet behind it, so think
of it almost like um, it's like spooning the ship from beneath, but
backwards, like head facing the back of the ship, not the front of
the ship. Um. Yeah, what else did you want to know?
Um? What else are you trying to figure out? Red? Well,
can I use animal handling to somehow figure out a week point? Huh?
That's a good question. Let's see how that role goes roll animal handles sixteen
sixteen nice sixteen, it's pretty good. Um. Let's say a male or
a female cracking boy. If you've rolled a seventeen out of given it to
wow, she's all that breaks back in the day. And now the question
about cracking we wanted to Okay, So I think what I'll give you is
given the way this creature has oriented itself. It was perfectly fine sticking its
tentacles out of the water and wrapping them on top of the ship where they'd
be shot, perfectly fine sticking its head out of the water and looking at
what it's doing. However, it's sort of belly is underneath the ship and
the hardest to reach spot. So I think from that you can more or
less surmise that is its weakest point. Okay, okay, um, I
would just swim as close as I can to the belly. H how you
can get all the way there and stab it with the dagger of yak Oh
wowow right in the kiss ye roll all right? Um, I think dagger
of yak is plus two hit maybe? Uh is it on your sheet?
It was on my old sheet, I believe, Oh yeah. And then
we had it not on your sheet for a little while. Um, and
I'm assuming it's a piercing things and that's a dagger. You have a plus
four. Yeah, your your daggers two four four. So it's crazy,
is it's ac is almost that Yeah, but it ended twenty one. Bit
it ended twenty one, so it hits and you're gonna do two die four
plus four damage. M hm, okay, two die four mm plus four
yeah, four six ten, ten points of damage. Um, we're gonna
double that because it's the soft underbelly and you can really like feel it,
like when you were on the tentacle, it felt armored. When you land
on this thing. It's like a way I hate these this word. It's
like soft and fish. Yeah, Like it's like soft and flush. You
stab and then like just because of the way you're sort of floating in the
water and the way it's moving, it almost like drags a full foot very
easily. Um, that's right, So we're gonna double that damage. It
is now considered poisoned and it will make a check based on that. Um.
When you pull the knife out this like, especially underwater, you can
tell viscous black uh chor just starts pouring out of its wound. And as
you're watching it underneath its skin, underneath it's like flesh, that same black
material kind of starts creeping outward from the wound. Uh, I wouldn't haale
it by. Yeah, like that probably wouldn't be good for you. But
what if you did. I thought you was gonna say this. I thought
you're gonna say And as the wound opens, little baby crack and start coming
out of an alien nightmare. Yeah, okay, um that was castral tembo
turn. It was a good turn. Mmmmmmmmm yes, indeed, mite.
I would like a crack, the cracking, yes, uh, reckon.
The best thing to do is, uh, just attack, do some damage.
I can't there's no way for me to really reach the head it's coming
out of the water. But like, there's not a bridge to it,
right, one will there's one way. You're holding a teleporting sword, correct,
Yeah, but yeah, no, there's not like a bridge to it.
You couldn't jump to it. If you jumped, you'd have to swim.
Yeah, you're covered in a heavy sword from when I made really good
purchase on slashing with a tentacle with my sword earlier. Did it did it
feel like I could actually cut through a tentacle like all the way through?
Is that the goal? Um? Like I thought, with a tentacle that
is just sitting there wrapped around the boat or I mean maybe not just sitting
there, but like, yeah, that is with some effort and a good
role, I think you could get enough through it to accomplish the goal essentially.
Um, you already did kind of land in one spot and turn it
a little bit, so I would say you're probably already one third of the
way through that particular tentacle in that particular spot. Yep. So that's what
I want to do. I want to go back to that spot. I
had kind of turned my attention away from there to catch Tom Bombo. But
I want to go back to that spot that I had worked on before and
uh and just go at it with a double handed attack with Missdweaver in that
same spot with the intent to really like take out that tentacle. Let's roll
an athletics at advantage. And I think you have some benefits from what heroism
man from rage? Uh, certainly from rage. Yeah, well so I'm
already I would already be rolling an athletics check at advantage because I'm raging,
So does that mean I get advantage just heroism? Give him any plus to
strength checks or anything like that. Okay, uh so that would be a
fifteen nine plus six. Yeah, all right, roll to hit and I'll
let you know how this goes. And I'm yeah, just run one there,
seventeen plus six on the misdeavers, so twenty three. Good lord.
All right, So here's the way we're gonna do this. I think you
sort of wait until this like the boat is sort of rocking, especially the
back of it, and you sort of wait until it's coming up, and
you just take a step in the leap feels like the easiest way to close
the distance. And when you land, you land in the wound like feet
first, you're like up to your ribs in tentacle, and then just push
down with the sword and start wiggling it. Yeah, within ten seconds,
you're through ninety percent of this thing, and it's losing its mod like it
starts letting go of those suction cups and pulling back. Pretty quickly, you're
up in the air maybe fifteen feet with the rest of the tentacle kind of
hanging by some fleshy strings. Is the way I would think of it.
So from from your attilius and Tom from y'all's perspective, because Keshral's underwater.
Kind of what you see is at some point you look over and Tom is
like standing on top of a tentacle pillar. Sorry, yeah, it's standing
on top of like a tentacle pillar with a sword in his hand. Maddened
rage, righteous square calavari, tonight damage Hail Satan, seventeen nice for damage
ten plus seven good night, all right, seventeen that's fucking yea. Yeah,
very am proposed for chopping off a tentacle all right, yeah, I
mean that that was a max damage roll. It is the Kraken's turn.
It has to roll to see if it can save from being poisoned. No
dice, nice um, So it remains poisoned, taking six more points of
damage. So is it throwing up It's great point because yeah, it does
not have any sort of like immunity of that. So yeah, as you
guys, it's less probably less you Kestral, So let's let's give it two
or three points of advantage. Are two or three points of perspective, So
Kestral, from where you're standing, you watch this black or just like,
Um, so you're sort of like floating right above its stomach, and you
watch this black acor just suddenly sort of rifle up its neck. Okay,
Um, you you're staying, uh, Timbo, you're standing on top of
this like tentacle pillar sort of still stats stared still in the tentacle, kind
of riding it a little bit, um, and it suddenly sort of stops
and and like stops, uh trying to fling you off, I guess.
And you look over at its head and it's just like it looks like it's
at out to lose its lunch. You know. It's just the neck is
like pivoting forward. Um. And then Tom and Attilius. From y'all's perspective,
what you see is, having just looked at Tom, you can see
that Tom's Timbo. You can see it. Timbo's now looking over towards its
face, so naturally follow his eyeline, and this thing just just throws up
a massive amount of black poisonous toxin into the water. Um. All of
these tentacles start falling into the water. The one that's crossed the boat starts,
you know, finishes sliding back into the water. And you can see
this thing duck its head back on Casha from your vantage point, it like
starts to turn and you can see like it's back legs, tentacles start swimming,
and it's it's clearly trying to like get away. It's running. Hey,
Lucious, looks more like a baby yack in to me. I think
we can throw that out of uh initial order unless someone wants to do something.
Uh well, I just like take a bow while on top of the
pillar that I'm on, and then uh and then just kind of casually like
step off and back on onto the onto the star, onto the stern of
the boat, as like as the as the boat is lifting back up because
it's getting off of the Yeah. And then I'm just like and then I
say, all right, Lucious, I'll take that bag. Now. He's
like, you didn't want to like check on your friend or anything. She
went the water. She's fine, I'm getting fine. All right, Uh
well, you know we did most of it for you. Is, but
I suppose i'll grab the bag for you. Oh did you yeah, I
don't even know what down there swam. I suppose did you go for a
dip? You know that that happened. That was all me. No,
no, no, no, that was it was. It was sick of
getting shot, is what it was. Would you like? Does sir?
He looks at it and it's dripping black, and he's like, oh yeah,
maybe you did some of it. Then maybe it was team effort.
It was probably a joint effort. If I had to guess, you will
get that back for you guys. You guys did great. You lost a
lot of them, though you did not do that great. I was go
of it right. Did you get something something because you could not hit the
broad side of the bond. I don't know how you've been meditating on these
last four days at sea, but he's just been feeling more peaceful. I
didn't want to do no damage. Apparently opium is not good for dragging me.
Every time he turns round of the other pirates, he's like, what
do you want? Like, applause, get back to fucking work. Then
he goes and grabs your bag, brings it back to you. Heck yeah,
should we check on Pin and Bill see if okay you made your right
down there? And pen is just hurling, I mean his whole he's he's
dry heaving at this point, he's already thrown everything up, and Bill is
attentive. He's got like a rag on his head, and Pen could not
be less interested in being attended to by Bill Penn. Are you okay?
All part of the plan? Oh well, thankfully Bill was here to take
care of you. I kind of save the day. In case you guys
didn't notice. Yes, you're welcome. Pin was informing me that that we
actually helped a great deal. I'm a little unsure of how without as flashy,
but we get the job done, so you know you're welcome. Guys.
I have a four one k Pindustries now I've been employed. I don't
get anything else. Match there's no match no four one k which I'm not
sure exactly what that give me the money? I put it into the four
oh one okay, all right, great, it's just happy to have me
to be here. We should probably kicks everybody out so she can change out
of close. Um, I got fine wrong up top decks. I'm feeling
good. I want to on the top deck. You did a hell of
a job. Thanks for shaving me man, I no problem, but uh
that was the last of the turtle jelly. I know I know, but
I think I learned to value the lesson today. I should probably probably should
just relax. One. I'm a little bit just on some of the drugs
I think. I think, well, I'm gonna I'm gonna try not to
do once we get put back on the plan. I mean we should maybe
yeah, okay, maybe a little bit of opium tonight this last night.
If we just defeated the crack and tonight, but that trade we should celebrate
with it. Yeah, just a little bit, all right, cool,
all right, that sounds good. But after that rum kestrel you did well?
You did really well. Also, oh you look great, just changed.
Thank you? If you do opium again, yes, I'm going to
break your loot all right. Uh, rum on your findest the barrel of
rum, please? Yes, wos like good news and sort of bad news.
Uh, the best crater rum is the only crater rum. So that's
fine news. Did you drag it? Ever? Everyone comes back with a
barrel that's like this big, like it's like a foot tall. That is
that's fine? Yeah, everybody, do you have anything else to drink?
Here? I sort of specialize in opium is sort of my idea alcohol opium
for you after tonight. Understand, just one more bump, I got it,
get out alright, alright, but leave the rum m. I do.
I appreciate all the work you did. You know, you saved the
ship and all that and uh and you know, kestro Lin, I know
you. You actually probably did a bunch of stuff under the You probably weren't
just taking a dip. I just want to do you know right that wrong
and Commendia on your impressive swimming abilities or whatever. So put out whatever you
talk that. She kicks him really hard, hurd dude, And I think
I'm guys, I think I'm going through a bit of withdrawal. No way,
I feel that's actually the turtle jelly mixing that together with the opium was
coming down from the turtle jelly. We just have a great night just drinking
and partying together. Yeah, absolutely, that is exactly what happens. You
have a great night, just the rest of the rum uh at think of
the night. Cash probably can't help herself. She asked, what it's rum
gone? You know? But other than that, uh passes about incident.
I get three sheets to the wind. You need to die? Do you
have an inspiration die? No? Three sheets to the wind is a good
fucking nautical drum term. Yeah, all right, um, And then the
next morning, with probably a headache and some light sensitivity, you wake up.
Last night's celebration was maybe a little bit too much. How much more
time do we have at sea? Captain Lucius sits up from a hammock in
the room. Hey, you slept in here last night. Yeah, you
said it was cool, but he did not say it wasn't cool, So
I just stayed it in the US. The swimming one she kicked meidating,
Yeah, she is very tall. Uh, and and and the hair with
the colorization, and you know, and the looks and the you know,
just the whole package. You have a crush a crush on anything that moves.
Let's be clear anything everybody in the room watching. Okay, this isn't
like anyway. Here's the deal where we should see land, you know,
in the next hour. So so your time, he has pretty much done,
which is good because I think I think Tom's probably lived a whole lifetime
in the last four days. I'm gonna have to have twenty you to go
remove the swimming lady from my room because I'm scared to do it. Frankly.
Um, yeah, and I'll start preparing you for for land. I
guess, uh, we're gonna land in the COO. Do you know anything
about the Coalian Aisles. You guys been here before, You're gonna need to
tell the first time, Okay, Coali and Aisles. But I do have
this coin, and I show them the coin that I have from the fights.
It. Yeah, that's real. It's it's old though, it's outdated.
They don't use this no more. Okay, yeah, hands it back
to me. He's like, that's not you know, they'll take it or
whatever. But it's like, that's that's old. That's probably fifty years old.
Man. Um Coalian Aisles. It's like just currency. It doesn't mean
anything else. Uh, not to meet from Lady Donalds. Yeah, Lady
Taro's had an owner and it has scratched into yeah yeah yeah, um Coali
and Aisles. It's like it's like a hundred islands out here all right.
Lots of lots of tiny ones, you know, a couple, a couple
of large ones, but there's lots of lots of super wealthy people who have
their own island with their own big fucking house on which I love because we
can go and rate it on our boat and then uh sell opium in the
city. So this is like paradise as far as I'm concerned. Um,
you said you was looking for somebody. Yeah, we are. I mean
we're kind of looking for well d his name's on the coin. Okay,
Yeah, so uh is he like super rich or something? Yeah, super
evil. Probably got a probably got a house somewhere in one of these islands,
no doubt. If you find the house, who probably find the guy.
You know. It's just I'm just I'm not an investigat all, as
they say, But that's what I was that phrase. Thank you. I
know I you told me about fourteen times last night? Friend? Uh Bill
was there where Where's Phil did not drink or do drugs all night? Fed
water, but he enjoyed it, and he was there for the investigators.
It's a list of um or any role of pe where where where? You
know what? We have the receipt. Uh, we have the receipt for
where shipped? Yes, the one I found? Yeah, give it a
give it, let me take give Losers takes a look at it. Oh
my god, this is uh, well I think I did this. I'm
being honest with you. What Yeah, no, I did this. This
is my receipt, Like, it's not my hand I got chicken scratch handwriting,
you know, so it's not mine. It's my first mate. But
um, yeah, no, we did this for sure. Yeah, he's
kind of an asshole, right, I don't. I don't think I met
him. I don't think I met him. Um, which, where did
you? Did you just unloaded off your ship or did you bring your men
bring it somewhere? No, we would have brought up to the island for
sure. Yeah, I know where. It's kind of where. Let me
talk to the first mate. I'll come back and we'll see. Maybe we
could just go right there. Yeah, yes, makes sense, He goes,
I'm assuming you guys kind of gather your things. Yes, Um,
don't forget that bag. Yeah, I got I got the bag. I
got all my stuff in the bag. Bill sort of mops up all the
all the throw up that's in the room. Somehow he got a mop.
No one knows how. Um, and Lucius comes back and put the mop
in my bag. Yeah, all right, I know where we're going.
Uh, and we just want to go right there? Is that the plan
just roll up is this a private island or all the private islands actually,
m hmmm, the land of one hundred isles. If they had like a
tourism thing, that would be it for sure. So where do you if
if I didn't not to own an island, I was just coming just stay.
Where would I go? There's a main the Kleian Maine is the main
island, um, and it's got docks that are publicly available. Somebody does
still own it, but you know, you can just pay a fee and
land there. Or we could go directly to somebody's island. Most of the
islands have deep water ports and stuff, so we can pull right up to
them. Should we go strange to Davics or into town first? I kind
of feel like Straights of Davics if we have a lead on that. That's
fair. I could really use a coffee. Oh we all fully healed now
after a night? Yeah we all slept right, I mean you slept,
but after drinking a bunch of rum and doing some opium, so you're full
rested. Um, let's just say everybody else you slept late in the morning,
all right? We gotta eleven am. Just ask because I was like
almost dead. Yeah, fair enough, fair enough, all right, straight
to his place, it did. So he runs up the stairs and in
very short order, as you guys can, kind of come up to the
deck with all of your equipment in tow. Um. When you get up
there, there's this big green island with palm trees all over it, sprawled
out in front of you. It's large, but um like, you can
see the edges of the island on either side, so you have a pretty
good sense of like how how big it is or how small it is.
Rather in the middle is this fairly large estate, very unlike the purple man's.
It's not ostentatious, it's not gaudy. It's more like a fortress three
story tall, kind of kind of a solidified tower. And on its lawn
stands a man about six feet tall and a purple cloak waving. At next
time on night shift, palm trees sway and a strong breeze, a saltyc
air, sobering you almost as much as the site of a body jumping dark
Wizard of Unfold Power