What's up, y'all. Welcome back to the Black Girl Experience. I'm your
host, Jasmine Dan. Yell. It's been a minute. It's been a
little minute. I don't know what a minute is. It hasn't been a
week or so, I don't know it's been it's been a it's been a
little minute, you know. And I feel like I say this every time
I come on here, like I always feel some type of way because I
still be wanting to record five days a week, even though I feel like
I don't be having shit to say five days a week. I just feel
like there's a distance between us. I feel like there's a distance between me
and the pod, and I hate that. I hate that for myself,
but also again on the flip side, I just feel like I'm in a
different space now, and I think that I need to learn to accept that.
And as I always say, like, I feel like I need to
go live some life and then come back to y'all and drop some gems.
And and that's the thing. Niggas be wanting to rush the fucking process.
I'd be wanting, and that's why I'd be flying through shitting yoga. That's
why I'd be flying through like slow down, cute the posts, letting niggas
do it, stop being so fast. Stop you know what I'm saying,
Stop letting your anxiety, your anxiety run your life, like slow the fuck
down, being the moment living and now go live your life and then come
back Jasmine, It's okay. But no, I've been taking a lot of
time to just self reflect and really pay attention to what's going on in my
life, to really tune into my intuition and what I'm feeling. My fucking
dreams. My dreams be so fucking crazy when I tell you, and I've
accepted that I'm that girl. I mean, yeah, I'm that girl,
but no, I've accepted that I'm that girl, like I'm that girl that
has dreams, and like my dreams are very powerful. They are becoming more
like just vivid and just very very much in tune with, you know,
with what's going on, and like the messages that I'm starting to receive,
like today, actually a girl on my like Instagram timeline, somebody that I
have a lot of mutual friends with, like she I would saying, like
she's an associate of mine, Like we're not friends, but you know,
a lot of the same mutual friends, and shit, she ain't been on
social media in a minute. I don't really know what she has going on
in her personal life, but she has not been on social media. And
recently one of her family members passed away. And last night I had a
dream that she was on Instagram posting saying like I'm gonna go to all the
places that my loved one, you know, frequented or frequented in the city
or whatever, like just places that he went to, like, Oh,
I'm gonna go there, you know, I guess for whatever reason, to
feel closer to him, to whatever. And on one of the posts,
she said that, oh, I found out that he goes to this one
place all the time, and he goes there to connect breath with movement,
which is yoga. And so I DM her to that out. And like
I said, she ain't been on Instagram, so I don't even know if
she's gonna read it or not. But I told her that I had that
dream, and I told her like the fact that number one, that we
don't even talk like that, and the fact that she ain't even been on
Instagram, but the fact that I had that dream and that it said that
she was going to go to a place that you know, her little one
that passed away, he went there because he would connect with breath and movement.
I'm like, that's yoga. So I just want to extend the invitation
to you to come to one of my classes one day, if you up
for it or whatever, you know, and just in my condolences. And
that was just really weird again because I have not talked to her and she
hasn't been posting, so I don't know. But for whatever reason, that
dream was put on my heart, and so you know, I reached out
to her, and whatever happens from that happens. I'm trying to think I
don't have some other dreams. I don't have some other dreams, but they
all be on point, and like, my dreams be real and my dreams
be true and if and that's another thing. I told one of my home
girls this the other day too. I'm like, if your ancestors put it
in a dream, nigga, you better move on it. You better listen
to it, you better move on and you better recognize, like, oh,
this shit is real. So if you having dreams or if something comes
to you in a dream, you better listen to it because that's the answer.
So, yeah, I've just been in my little self reflection bag.
I've been in my teaching bag. I've been in my you know, staying
focused bag and my focus on my goals and just all of that. But
I could be more focused, I could go even more harder. I can
improve, you know what I'm saying, And I really need to get I
need to get on my own ass. I need to put the fire up
under my own fucking ass because it's just like I'm not even at my highest
potential, you know what I'm saying. I feel like I'm barely tapping the
surface with it. It's like, oh, I know what I want.
I feel like I'm dancing with my highest potential, you know what, I'm
not even not even I feel like I'm like tippy toeing with it, like
sticking my toe in on a dance floor and then jumping back off like I'm
you know what I'm saying, Like I'm not really going for a throttle a
thousand percent with this ship. But at least I'm aware of that. And
that's one thing that I always talk about is just self awareness and the fact
that man, if you can acknowledge some shit about yourself and be aware and
be like, Okay, you know what I'm saying that that's the first part.
But I definitely just feel like I'm on a great path. I feel
like I'm always moving forward. I feel like I'm putting one foot in front
of another in front of another each day, and even if they're baby steps,
at some point them baby steps is gonna equal out to what I want
the outcome to be, you know what I'm saying. And speaking of outcomes,
another thing that I am practicing is the art of detachment to the outcome.
You know what I'm saying, not so much focusing on the outcome,
but more so on the process of things and just evaluating everything in the middle.
You know what I'm saying, before I even get to the outcome and
after I start whatever it is that I'm doing. I feel like in this
day and age, I feel like we're all just obsessed with instant gratification.
We're obsessed with numbers, we're obsessed with money, We're obsessed with you know,
the outcome of things and likes. That's not where the lessons are,
that's not where the growth is. I mean, eventually that's where the growth
is. But it's really about the process, is what you're doing in the
moment and everything that you're putting into it, and that's what you gotta fo
It's really about the impact, you know what I'm saying. And that's why
it's so important to have a purpose and to be doing shit for a reason
and to just be intentional with everything that you're doing, because Nigga, if
you ain't doing it for a reason, who the fuck cares about the numbers?
Who cares about the likes? Who cares? You know what I'm saying,
All that shit is fake. It's a fucking algorithm on the internet.
Like, and that's not what I'm here for. And it's like, Jasinye,
you just gotta keep applying pressure and keep putting in the work every day
period because what you want and what you see for yourself is going to come
to fruition, you know what I'm saying. And I just look at all
of the small steps that I've taken this far, I've looked at the goals
that I have accomplished thus far, and you know what I'm saying again,
looking at Black Girl experience, that ship was a fucking a seed in my
mind back when I was like, Oh, I'm gonna have a podcast and
i'm gonna call it Wine Down Wednesdays, and I'm gonna just be drinking wine
and talking shit. And then, you know, and I kept saying I
kept saying it. I kept saying that I'm gonna have a podcast. I'm
gonna have a podcast. And then eventually it just kept you know, you
know what I'm saying, It just kept altering, the name getting altered,
the content whatever. And then eventually it came to like, oh, I'm
talking about sex and relationships from our personal experiences, and I wanted to call
it real and ratchet, but I was like, m I feel like it
ain't no longevity and that, you know what I'm saying, Like, I
want something classic, I want something timeless. I want something you know,
unique but also true to me. And I'm like, fuck it, I'm
talking about sex and relationships from my personal experiences, nigga black girl experience.
And then the rest is fucking history, you know what I'm saying. I
think about back to when I wrote down not even fucking six. It's April
today, it's April first, It's April fools Day, shout out to the
fucking fools that lost me, but no, not shout out se y'all niggas,
y'all nas No, but no, it ain't even I mean, technically
this month makes it six months that I started doing yoga, but it ain't
even been six months to the day yet. So when I look back at
what I wrote down in a notebook, when I was like, okay,
I talked to my cousin's mom and I'm like, I gotta figure out what
I want to do with my life as far as a career, as far
as a job, and I'm like, she told me to write down all
of the things that I was interested in doing, you know that it might
not just be about to check but something that I really want to do.
And she was like, you know, fuck all these other jobs. It's
too late in the game to still be accepting job offers and doing shit that
you don't want to do, especially when you're not even making the type of
money that you want to make or deserve to make, or that's gonna help
you pay your bills and all of that shit. And one of the things
that I wrote down on that list was yoga. And I had done yoga
maybe a handful of times, you know what I'm saying, But I hadn't
at that point. I had never went to a real yoga studio like I
had just went to some little classes that niggas was throwing, you know what
I'm saying, and did that and even and at that time when I was
doing it, then I didn't even really like yoga like that. And it
was probably because I wasn't in the best shape pre yoga, you know what
I'm saying. It wasn't really comfortable for me. And that's another thing that's
probably why niggas don't want to do yoga, because but you gotta start somewhere.
And another thing that I don't understand though, when I encourage or suggest
for niggas to come to yoga, they'd be giving me the craziest excuses.
And it'd be niggas too. It'd be the niggas that be talking about they're
gonna come to support or that they want to come. These are the same
niggas that be on Instagram every day. In the fucking gym, I'm talking
about bench pressing that steel that iron nigga. Okay, niggas, I'm three
seventy four. I'm four hundred five, like, bitch, you can't do
yoga? What the so we're only holding up our own body way to hear
that's all we're doing. We're just doing a little updog down dog. Were
just hauling a little tree poles. We just can't you stand on one leg,
you know what I'm saying. But again, self acceptance for where you
are in the present moment, so you know. But niggas be acting like
they about to get killed in a drive by shooting if they come to yoga,
and I just don't get it. And again, another thing that I
have to learn to accept and really cope with is that. And I don't
know why this is so hard, because I have a podcast that the niggas
that fuck with me, or the people that you would think that I would
hope will listen to it or want to support the podcast, are not the
niggas that fucking listen to it. I do have my few close immediate friends
that listen, and y'all know, Tammy go crazy for me. Shout out
to my friends, Tammy. Tammy gonna listen to the episode. She gonna
have a notebook and a pen out. She's gonna write down all of her
thoughts on the episode, anything that sparked or caught her attention, anything that
she want to respond to. This was good, I agree with this whatever,
blah blah blah, or having something to add to it. And she
come back and literally tell me everything and tell me how how the message impacted
her, what she took from it, all of that. You know what
I'm saying, Panda always listening in the car like, oh my god,
friend, da da da, You know what I'm saying. So like I
have my close and my immediate friends that listen to it. But other than
that, when I first dropped this shit, I'm like, Dan, niggas
ain't really support ain't support me. Not the people that you would think,
you know what I'm saying, Your everyday niggas yo in the circle niggas whatever,
those are not the people that support you. But here I am A
million plays later, eight hundred something episodes later, probably I don't know what
my rating is on the podcast at but I believe it's like a four point
nine stars. Like all of the people that listening to and support this are
people that I barely fucking even know, and be like I've been tuned in
since day one. I've been listening for a year. I've been listening for
two years, and the same thing goes for yoga. I cannot be surprised
when number one niggas don't even care about health and willness. That's number one
niggas don't even care about their health or their fucking willingness. Why the fuck
are we gonna come to a yoga class, bitch. We're trying to spend
this this money at the club. We're trying to buy a bottle, We're
about to buy some weed. We're about to go on a trip to fucking
Vegas in Miami. We're gonna go ball out on the ground. We're not
fucking coming to yoga with you. You know what I'm saying. But you
gotta understand that nigga's priorities be in another place and you can't even you can't
take that shit to the heart. Nigga, who is for us? Who
is for and so? UM today was definitely just like UM. Today was
a learning curve. Today was definitely it gave me a different perspective because I
was able to really um, I was really just able to evaluate being in
a different environment and a different teaching environment. This was my first time teaching
that Apes Clubhouse, which I fucking love. I told y'all, that's the
mind, Body Spirit gym that I went to. And the guy that owns
the gym he usually held his own like I guess, like boot camp classes,
workout classes, all of that. Ship is a very nice gym,
and so, you know, it was it was different. I'm not gonna
lie. It was different to be in a different space and be teaching,
Like you know what I'm saying, because I'm so used to being at the
Trap. So it's like just little things getting used to the music, the
speakers, um, and just you know, walking around and just being comfortable
in the space. It's you know what I'm saying, It's different than being
at home. So it was a little bit of an adjustment with that.
Two people showed up, two people bought tickets, two people support it,
and they were my very good friends, my very good yoga friends. So
shout out to Science, said Ashley for coming through for me today. It
was so funny because they're yogis, you know what I'm saying. These motherfuckers
do yoga every day. So that was also a different experience because I felt
like they was flying through it and it was really like I really didn't even
have to cue the moves because they already you know what the fuck to do.
So I felt like we was kind of running through it. But we
still finished on time and at a good time today. But you know what
I'm saying, When I'm usually teaching my classes on Monday, Wednesday, Friday,
the people are much slower, and you know what I'm saying, it's
just whatever. But I was in there with Master Yogi today, so it
was just a different vibe and I'm like, dang, I need some other
people to come out. But it was still just a very good experience and
again like just me learning to detach from the outcome, because two things with
this whole situation is that y'all know, originally I was supposed to have my
thirty third birthday party at the Trap, which was supposed to be a glow
on the Dark yoga party had to cancel at because of the snowstorm. I
was really upset about that. I was upset before I even had to cancel
it because I'm like, oh my god, are people are gonna buy tickets?
You know what? I'm saying, niggas. And that's the thing.
I feel like people are just really wishy washy. Also, you don't know
what people's personal situations is when they getting paid, when they could buy a
ticket, you know what I'm saying. It I just feel like I'd be
so on my head about stuff that I shouldn't even be worried about, always
be worried about how something gonna turn out, what the outcome is gonna be,
when you need to be focused on putting in the work and just you
know what I'm saying, and enjoying the fucking journey and what happens happens,
and you take whatever you take from it in the end. So that happened,
and then I'm like, fucking let me run it back, you know
what I'm saying. Running out the space here, I'm like, I'm gonna
throw a class. And again, another thing that's really irritating is like the
whole ticket thing and putting shit on event, right, I would rather not
have to do all of that, But you know, I'm I'm gonna tweak
a couple of things and figure out how I want to do things going forward.
But just overall, I just was able to evaluate my whole process and
again just being in a different environment and you know, allowing myself the grace
to grow, you know what I'm saying, just as a teacher and just
being in this new element of even you know, of a new career field
and being a teacher, Like it's so much to learn. Yeah, I
am the teacher, but they at the end of the day, I'm still
a motherfucking student. Period. It's just been so fucking much. M It
was so funny too, because somebody said to me, they was like,
um, so another thing is that, um, I'm teaching that Cody on
Tuesdays. We have a like a believe it's like a six week contract to
do that with the trap and so we're actually at a few different high schools.
Unfortunately, nobody has ever showed up at Cody, Like, nobody has
come all these weeks. Nobody has come, right, but they've been coming
to some of the other ones. And then we just we just got a
whole slew another schools that we're about to be at in the upcoming weeks in
April. But um, yeah, nobody has came at Cody and so um,
except for one day when I didn't come when they told us not to
come because the power was out, but they were somebody it was people up
their weight, and I'm like, how and y'all said the power was out,
but whatever, So it hasn't been nobody there. And I was talking
to somebody about, like, you know, just being nervous about all putting
on the whole goal on the dark yoga thing or whatever at the clubhouse,
and they was like, well, if you said it ain't nobody came to
Cody in six weeks, why do you care if nobody show up? And
I'm like, shit, I don't know, But actually I do know because
I had to invest money into this. You know what I'm saying. It's
different, Like I get paid regardless of somebody show up at the school or
not. But to have to actually invest your money and you know what I'm
saying, to just do all this extra shit. It's different when niggas don't
show up. But luckily two people came. If to me, it's like
two people are twenty people, nigga, the gratitude is always there. And
again, this is the fucking beginning. I can't expect for my shit to
just be banging with six hundred people. You know what I'm saying the same
Like with the podcast, it wouldn't I wouldn't I didn't get a million plays
over night, nigga that I've been doing this podcast for five fucking years,
so nigga greatness takes time. So yeah, just that aspect of it.
But I'm very happy with how it did turn out. And again I'm running
into the I'm running it back again next Saturday, so April eighth, at
three pm at Apes Clubhouse. If you're in the Detroit or Metro Detroit area,
come through the classes twenty dollars, but if you bring a friend,
y'all can come for thirty. I don't think I'm gonna do the event right,
so you could DM me or contact me if you want to come.
I'm probably just gonna go by, probably just gonna go with like Apple,
pay Vimo and zill so that and then also don't forget that I'm at the
Trap Monday, Wednesday Friday at nine forty five in the morning, and then
tomorrow Sunday, April second, I'll be doing a yend class at nine am
at the Trap. So if you're listening to this now, you're like,
dang, I want to come in the morning, slide through. Okay,
Um, what else? What else? What else is new? Man?
Oh my god, it's been so much halfter that. Bro, It's been
so fucking but bro, it's been so much happening. So um, I'm
not even gonna lie a bit. And fell in love overnight. I am
not going to lie. And it's not like I fell in love last night,
but it was overnight. I ain't gonna lie. And um again,
I'm just in this space in my life where I'm just I'm just embracing the
real. I'm embracing the real. I'm embracing how I feel and I'm literally
living in the moment. And I'm not gonna lie. I fell in love
overnight. I'm not gonna lie to you. I'm not gonna lie to you.
So you know, I don't know if it's the last episode or the
one before this. And I was just talking. I did talk about and
I did acknowledge that, you know, I may have a slight control problem,
I may be kind of cling you, blah blah blah, just all
of that, so that that that is a thing. But um, you
know, I didn't go really too deep into it. And I'm still not
gonna go too deep into it, but I guess I will give y'all niggas
a little heads up. So um, oh my god, I can't even
believe I'm about to share this. I just feel so. But I don't
know. Me telling them or sharing my story might give other niggas hope or
you know what I'm saying, It might encourage somebody to step out of their
comfort zone or out of their box and encourage somebody to just live their fucking
life because you never know what's on the other side of fear, you know
what I'm saying. And again, everybody's journey is different. So I don't
even give a fucking niggas judge me because when I pop out talking like damn,
you really isn't love, we could see it on your face like it's
that it's that real. So, like I said, I ain't gonna get
too deep, but I'll share a little bit with y'all that, Um,
I found this person. I found this person, and um, we don't
live in the same state. Just me trying to pick and choose what I
want to say. I found this person. We don't live in the same
state. One of the reasons why I truly believe that this person is my
person is just because of all the synchronicities and all of like all of the
things that came up when we not even like met, but you know what
I'm saying, when we connected, just all of this stuff came up.
And y'all know I'm a super spiritual person. Y'all know I'm super big on
my angel numbers. I'm super big on the meaning of shit and all of
that. So there were so many instancing instances with like angel numbers with us.
So like the two two two, that's like our number. And so
mind you, the first class that I taught, my first Juggle class,
I taught it on two two two, right, And so when I talked
my class that day, I had a whole spiel in my class about why
that day was symbolic or why it was significant for me. And it was
because a year ago, on that day, I had moved back to Detroit
from California. You know all of that bullshit. But it was on two
two two. So then a year later, I'm teaching my first Yogo class.
I'm like two too two. So me and him was talking one day
and he was like, I don't know what day this was, but we
was talking and he was like, oh, that's so crazy. He was
like, I just was reading up on a number two to two last night
and I'm like, that's weird, and he was like, yeah, it's
it's on about like twin flame and blah blah blah. So immediately I'm like,
oh, I'm straight on the twin flame shit. Because if you go
back, I want to say, maybe two years ago, I think it
was I had a whole experience where I felt like, oh, I felt
like this person was my twin flame. It was a very pushing pool too.
Most was type situation. Things went really fast whatever, and I was
like, uh, whatever, you know, it just wasn't a good thing.
It started off good and I thought it was you know what I'm saying,
but whatever. So I'm like, I'm straight on the twin flame ship
whatever blocks ain't blah. So I don't know, two two two just kept
coming up and then like I always see it on the clock. I'm always
either waking up in the middle of night at two twenty two or I'm always
catching it on the cloud. I'm catching every Angel number every time, and
not even purposely. I promise I always just look and see whatever. So
he was saying, like, you know, I keep catching two two two
on the clock two and blah, blah, blah whatever. I'm like,
okay, whatever. Cool. So then just all of these other coincidences,
or just all of these other synchronicities, the fact that we got the same
initials, I'm like, that's weird as fuck, you know what I'm saying.
I told him about when I was turning at thirty three on three three
and oh, and then he had told me he was like, yeah,
my life changed when I thirty three, and he said he always knew that
it was gonna change. When he was like, for whatever reason, he
always knew that when he turned thirty three that his life was gonna change.
He was like, I didn't know what was gonna happen, but I knew
it was gonna change for the better. And he talked about, you know,
how he found YO good and all this other stuff and how I really
changed his life and blah. I's like blah, and you know, so
we had just were just kicking it and stuff, and so as time went
on, it's just like, you know, you can't deny an undeniable connection.
You just can't you know what I'm saying, Like, I can't make
this shit up. It'd be one thing if niggas was out here forcing it,
and like, you know what I'm saying, and I'm not gonna lie.
I've done that in the past. I've done that many times in my
life. I've forced things. I've stayed the situations longer than I should.
I've continued to pursue people or continue to you know, give people. All
are just being situations and spaces where I know, like, this is really
not it, you know what I'm saying. So again, you cannot deny
an undeniable situation period. So yeah, we've just been kicking it and I'm
not gonna lie. It's just a little. It's been a little. It's
been a couple of curveballs in the game with us, but we still here.
We're still here. And another thing is just the foundation and the friendship.
I think that there's a very a very passionate, a very fiery like
connection between us. I think that we have a lot of chemistry, we
have a lot of a lot of sexual chemistry, we have a lot of
just like a very strong attraction to each other. However, we've never had
sex, we've never even seen each other in a person yet that's the thing.
That energy is there. But aside from that, the foundation in the
friendship is there. Like today, he asked me a question and he was
like, well, you can tell me. You'll answer when you call me
when we you know, when we talk again later. And I was just
thinking about what I wanted to respond, what I wanted my answer to be
to the question, and one of the parts of my answer was just that
I really feel like he's my friend first, you know what I'm saying,
Like again, like we've never even bending each other's presence, you know what
I'm saying physically, But I could just feel the vibes because again, this
is a person that I talked to every fucking day and you know, for
hours on the end. But I think, you know, with reason within
reason, because we don't live in the same place and niggas still get the
shit done. It's not like, oh, were just on the phone just
not doing shit like nigga's and shit done. But we talk to each other
all the time, and I just feel like I feel a connection. But
I definitely feel like it's a friendship, like just like, you know what
I'm saying, And I think that's the best in relationships when it's like,
dang, that's my dog, Like, that's my best friend. That's my
homie, like aside from any sexual feelings or attractions or anything like that,
because again that shit is there. But besides that, like if we was
in the same place, like if we did live in the same place or
whatever, it's like, that would really be my best friend. That's my
dog, Like we're gonna do with everything together type shit. Like, and
we also have a relationship to where like we're very open with each other,
We're very honest with each other, We're able to be vulnerable with each other,
We're able to share whatever, and we're just on the same page.
Oh and another thing, we're both fucking pisces. Both of our birthdays in
March. Our birthdays are seven days apart, so it's like and another thing
that I always say was like, dang, I never knew that I needed
another me, you know what I'm saying, Because I feel like I feel
like he's a reflection to me. I feel like I don't feel like we
are the same person, but we do have a lot of similarities and I
think I've said this on here many times before. Like you know, they
say that opposite is attract and you know, cool, whatever works for other
people, it's cool. But I don't think that I could be with an
opposite person. And I damn sure wouldn't want to, you know, I
wouldn't purposely want to be with an opposite I want to be with somebody that's
very similar to me, because people that are opposite it's just like it ain't
no, it's too much of a it's too much of a pool. It's
too much of a like, m this ain't gonna really work, you know
what I'm saying. I just think of people that get on my nerves or
like I don't want you know what I'm saying, No, we gotta have
some commonalities. We gotta have the same lights, we gotta have similarities some
again, yeah, we're both pisces um and so yeah, I was saying,
like I never knew that I needed another me, Like I feel like
I might have joked in the past, and you know, one thing that
I hear people say, it's like you you could never date the same sign
like that shit just don't work out. And then I've just thought about what
I've said about male pisces in the past, Like Floyd Mayweather's pisces, I
would never date him. First of all, I know I ain't date no
braggadosh's arrogant ass, just over the top ass niggas. That's a no,
off the top. But I'm like Floyd Mayweather's a pisces. Bowalls of pisces.
No, that's a definite no. What are the niggas of pisces?
I don't know. And then I just think about the male pisces that I
know, and it's just always been like a nough for me, like I
don't know, I don't know, and like he's the first person that I've
ever met that it's like, damn, I like you and your pisces.
And it even like he is super emotional asking you know what I'm saying,
but again, very in tune with his emotions and definitely expresses how he feels
and all of that. But when you think of pisces, like when first
of all, when I think of pices, I think of myself and I
know how I am. But you know, I can't say that it's the
same for a man. But in my mind, what I think of a
pisces. That's not what I think of him as far as like emotions,
Like, I definitely feel like he's still a very grounded person. But I
think that's because he's a man. I think that men are just naturally more
grounded than women. Like niggas don't really be out. Niggas can't really be
in the clouds. Nigga's head can't really be in the clouds. Niggas got
to be grounded and understand, you know. But again, niggas are more
logical and more on paper by the book. If it don't make money,
it don't make sense. He a nigga at the end of the day,
so way more grounded than me. But he is a fucking pisces, and
he speaks. He speaks to the pisces in me. He speaks to the
fishing me, you know what I'm saying, and he just I just feel
like we connect on all levels. So that is that. With that,
I'm trying to think, is there anything else that I could share? So,
Yeah, when I was talking about a couple of weeks ago that I
had went to Atlanta, but that wasn't really where I was supposed to go.
It wasn't really where I wanted to be, That's what that was.
But you know, we're gonna run it back. We're gonna run it back
and get it right. And you know, just the conversations that we've been
having about us in the foundation of us and all of that, and you
know, still taking things slow, but um, you know, just allowing
myself to live my fucking life and again to find somebody that I don't want
to say on the other side of the world because he ain't on the other
side of the world, but he don't live here, you know what I'm
saying. So again, that's what makes it even more real to me,
the fact that we have all of these similarities and all of these synchronicities that
came up between us and like the things that connect us to each other.
Like how could this not be my person? You know what I'm saying.
How could this not be set up by the universe? How could this not
be divine? How could this not be aligned? So like, I don't
know niggas that's not spiritual or not in tune with their life and their selves
and what they got going on, that's you know, that's on you.
But I really believe that everything happens for a reason, and I feel like,
you know, I feel like all of this shit, all of this
shit is destant. All of this shit is fake. All of this ship
was playing, all of this ship was written in stone before any of this
happened, you know what I'm saying. So I'm gonna just you know,
keep walking on my journey period. I currently have my planner open right now.
It's also my brother's birthday today, my twin brothers, Darylnda Lando,
So happy birthday to them. The niggas is all this health thirty nine okay,
almost forty. Um, But right now I'm just looking at my planner
and every day and here I'll just write down like the days that I work,
the class that I you know, the class that I teach, the
time, keep up with my pay that way as well. Um and UM,
I write my little goals for the month down on the side. And
I got some goals on here, and I got and I got two of
them checked off. You know what I'm saying. I got travel, traveling,
yogi, traveling, bi weekly teaching at apes checked off. Um,
basically to turn my yoga money into like basically converting the money that I make
from yoga into like what would be equivalent to like a forty hour a week
check Um, new opportunities checked off. Um, new teacher gives, I
guess I could check that off as well. Um, A bunch of little
yoga goals. You know, new month, new money, new man,
and I guess I could check that off. I mean it ain't you know
what I'm saying, eggs, ain't whatever, but basically check it off.
New energy, new crib, new car, meditating daily practicing, daily,
creating, you know, some flows for classes and shit like that. Um,
but this is what I kind of do to keep myself in line.
And like I said, I want to just get on my own ass as
far as like it's just really the fitness in the eating for me, That's
what it is for me. Like I have goals for myself and I'm just
not accomplishing those and it's like you need to do better and stop giving in
to temptation. UM, I do need to finish. Look, I'm behind
all my affirmations for two days, so I need to do that. And
UM, I don't know, but I definitely feel like I I've always felt
like I'm a super intentional person, especially with like my ray ships and stuff
like that. Well, I can't say that one spent a lot of times
that I'd be I'd be on some bullshit. But one thing that I will
say is that it's so funny that the toxicity has spent the block and I'm
not really understanding. I mean, I am understanding. I feel like I
feel like it might be a slight test from the universe to see if I'm
really serious about my goals and the plans that I have for myself. Because
I'm not gonna lie. There are two niggas in my life, but like,
not in my life right now, but there were two niggas in my
life that I had a ball with. Like I don't want to say a
lot on niggas, but like, there are two niggas in my life that
I had an absolute ball with that I know or that I knew were not
for me, you know what I'm saying. Like, ultimately, when I
said it down with myself and have a real nigga moment with myself, I
know that those niggas bring no value to me. They bring no value to
me, no benefit to me. Don't uplift me in any type of way.
They're just a fun time. And so I finally was able to get
to a point in my life where like I had cut them off, you
know what I'm saying, And not that I mean they were, they were
two different times, whatever, you know. I have finally got to a
place where I had cut them off. And it was hard. It was
very hard, because who doesn't like a good time? Who don't like a
good time? Who don't you fucking lie to me? Don't you sit there
right now, don't you sit there right now listening to this and tell me
that you don't like to have a good time. Don't tell me you don't
like the toxicity. Don't don't tell me you don't like to have fun.
Don't tell me you don't like to feel good, because we all do.
So I have finally gotten to a place where I cut them off, and
it was very fucking hard. It was very hard. It was very hard.
It was very hard. It was like, I don't know, it
was very hard though. It was very hard. And it's so crazy because
it's like, why would it be so hard to cut off somebody when you
know that they're not good for you? You know what I'm saying like ultimately
like, oh, what's fun we together or whenever we're doing what we're doing,
that's fun. But afterwards it's like do I really feel good? You
know what I'm saying when I think about like the fact that I still feel
empty. I don't feel like you gave me anything. Again, you didn't
bring no value to my life. So it's like in those moments, and
then just dealing with all the bullshit that comes with you know what I'm saying,
with dealing with toxic people and sitting there really outweighing the pros and the
cons isn't really worth it? And again, to be a person like me,
to really be spiritually in tune, to be working towards your goals and
your aspirations, to have plans for your life, to be very intentional with
your life and what you're doing, and to have unintentional ass niggas around you,
to be having unintentional interactions around you. That type of stuff taints a
life of intention. Dealing with unintentional people will tain't an intentional life. So
I finally cut them off, and then here they come spinning a block number
one when I damn near got a whole husband. That's number one, and
then number two, just at the space that I've been in, like really
flourishing, really seeing things looking up for myself, like career wise, money
wise, all of that, you know what I'm saying. And again,
that's something that you have to pay attention to. That's something that you have
to take note of. When you eliminate certain people out of your life,
when you eliminate the toxicity out of your life, you start to see a
change in the in the energy. You start to see a shift in the
energy, You start to see a shift in your life. Okay, I'm
doing better, I'm doing good. Go back and funk with some unintentional ask
niggas, go fuck with you know, niggas, that's not bringing you value.
And then see what that due to your life on the daily. So
again, niggas spent the block, and it's like, h why are you
spending the block. You're not spending the block because you really care about me
and because you miss me and because you've changed, or because you want things
to change between us, or you want stuff to be better. You know
what I'm saying. You're spending the block because you want access to me.
You're spending the block because you want to see if I'm gonna respond. You're
spending the block because it's convenient for you. You're spending the block to see.
Damn, do you still live here, You're still in the same crib,
You're still on this street. That's why you're spending the block. So
for me, again, number one, I'm damn near married even though I'm
not. But that's number one to me. To be in a situation where
I feel like I'm seeing, I'm her, I'm appreciated, I'm value you.
I feel like this person has given me all of the things that I
need and that I want. You know what I'm saying, I'm feeling fulfilled
with this person, Like the energy is good, the vibes are good,
whatever. That's number one. And again, not having a big or or
plead or like you know what I'm saying, or put a leash around a
nigga neck and try to make a nigga do with you you know what I'm
saying, Or want the nigga to be somebody that he's not, or want
the nigga to to give you things or do things that they're not even capable
of giving or doing. For you, you know what I'm saying. So
to be in a situation where where you're getting everything that you need, that's
that's number one for me. But again number two, why are you spending
the block because nothing has changed, Your conversation hasn't changed, you know what
I'm saying. Throw a little love bomb in there to get back on you
know what I'm saying, to give me back on your on your team or
whatever. Like I'm not dumb, I'm not dumb. I don't know if
niggas think that I'm dumb, but I think niggas think that I'm dumb,
which is cool because I guess that's kind of how you got to play it.
You can't let it. You can't let your right hand know what the
left hand is. You know what I'm saying. You can't. You really
can't let niggas get a good read on you. But I know, I
know. So that's happening. And again, aside from my situation that I
have going on again, just really focusing on the fact that Jasmine you are.
You've come so far, you know, in such little time, and
especially again it's April first today, and like I said, I started doing
yoall I want to say I started doing yoga, maybe like October thirteen,
twenty twenty two. I don't know if that's the day, but that's around
the time. I started doing yoga in October. So April is just now
six months. You gotta think. I started doing yoga in October. I
started my yoga teacher training in November. I graduated in January. I started
teaching my first class in February, and it still has not even been six
months that I've been practicing. So that's a hell of an accomplishment to me,
and I'm very proud of myself and again accomplishing that much in such little
time. And then just even in the time from the time where I cut
niggas off, What have you accomplished in this time? What have you learned?
What have you seen change in your life since you cut niggas off and
was able to get focused on yourself and getting your bag, because when you
was working with the toxicity, it wasn't going well. I mean, it
was straight, but there were just things that I noticed about my life and
what was happening around me and just in my everyday routines when I was fuck
with niggas that I knew that I shouldn't be fucking with you, know what
I'm saying, The drama they bring, the inconsistency, the you know,
like, why am I even doing this? I'm acting like I don't value
myself. I'm acting like I don't love myself by fucking with you, you
know what I'm saying. And again, you're just here for the benefit,
You here to see whatever the fuck you can get from me until I cut
off the access, until I'm like, you know what, No, I
want better for myself and you're not even offering nothing. You're not even offering
nothing. If you step to a guy, that you got to come with
a offering my guy. So there's that. And then yeah, so I
just been doing a lot of self reflection lately, just a lot of reflection
and again just trying to focus on the journey. You know, like so
many times we're caught up on the outcome, We caught up on the where,
the why, the how, the who, And it's like, bro,
you got to figure that shit out as it comes. You just gotta
walk your path the period, you know what I'm saying. We always want
a whole fucking manual ridden out Like first of all. There is no manual
to life. There is no there's no manual to life, there's no manual
to parenthood. You just gotta do this shit and however the fuck it turns
out, it's hot, it turns out so again, detaching yourself from the
outcome and really just being in the moment, being in the present and living
and learning is all that you can do. Period. A ill is not
really an ill. It's really a lesson learned at the end of the day,
and there's so many lessons to be learned. And another thing is that
I really realized it's like and it's so weird because I've been here so many
times myself in a situation where I feel like people, you know what I'm
saying. I feel like a lot of times we want more for people than
they want for themselves. Or you want somebody to learn a lesson, or
you want to try to show somebody something so bad and they're not able to
see it because they are not there yet. You know what I'm saying.
You gotta let people, You gotta you gotta let people live their own lives
and come into their own lessons and learn stuff at their own time. You
gotta let niggas come into an enlightenment on their own. You gotta let niggas
learn about the people in their life whatever. You got to. Let people
learn that shit on their own. You cannot force it. You cannot make
somebody see something that they are unable to see, you know what I'm saying,
Because at the end of the day, the universe is gonna let it
play out how it's supposed to. And another thing is a lot of times
people are dealing with karmic energy or with karmic debt within themselves, and that's
another thing. That's another thing, okay, And I'm gonna try to stop
doing that. I'm gonna trying to stop jumping from one thing to the next.
So one thing is people are going to be dealing with karmic energy and
karmic debt on their own. And you cannot insert yourself into somebody else's situation
and try to play god or play the universe or get people to see certain
things. They are dealing with their own karmic energy and debt, and you
have to let that play out. You can't be trying to you know what
I'm saying. You can't be in that bitch what's the little not the culture
guy, it's the little shit whatever. When niggas got the string in the
doll. You can't control shit for niggas. You gotta let shit happen for
them as well as people can't do that for you. Either. Another thing
is as a woman or just as a person period. But as a woman,
you definitely do not want to be with a man that has a dark
cloud over his life, a dark cloud of bad arma or bad energy over
his life. Because if you decide to be with a man like that,
you're gonna get all of that bad energy. You're gonna get all of that
bad arma, period, you know what I'm saying. So be aware of
the people that you decide to, you know, walk hand in hand within
life, be with whatever, and be conscious of the energy, be aware
of the energy, because I don't want a dark cloud over my life.
You know what I'm saying. I'm going in a very good direction. And
again that's the thing. So when when when when these toxic niggas is spinning
the block? Yeah you're an amazing time, but you come with a lot
of dark energy, You come with a you come with a dark cloud,
you come with rain, You come with shit that you know. I'm not
trying to walk in the rain every day. I'm trying to be sunshine ninety
degrees in this bitch. You know what I'm saying. Like, And you're
you're coming with a lot of you. I'm in with a lot of um.
You're coming with a lot of extras. You're coming with the rain,
sleet and snow. You're coming with a lot of precipitation. I'm here for
the sun in the shade, okay, because I'm the sun on me and
I know niggas is throwing shade and that's why I got my glasses on.
You feel me. But that's what I'm here for. So that I think
that's pretty much. That's all that I have to share right now. I
can't really think of anything else. So yeah, again, if y'all want
to come fuck with your girl on the yoga tip Monday, Wednesday Friday at
the Trap ninety five in the morning, I'll be there tomorrow at nine am
for a year, and then catch me again next Saturday at Apes Clubhouse at
three pm. Bring a friend, tell a friend all of that, and
tell a friend and tell a friend about the podcast. Okay, period and
also to all the fake pages, give a fucking life, get no for
real, y'all. Nigga, y'all niggas is mad weird. Bro y'all niggas
is mad weird. And I just you got a lot of time. You're
investing a lot of time to create a fake page, to go out your
way to message me, to comment, to follow me, to change your
profile picture every day, to unfollow me, to lurt to what like,
y'all niggas are weird? Just come from your regular page. You know what
I'm saying. My shit is always open. I ain't gonna never have my
ship private. Um, what you're looking for, we got what you're looking
for? What you're looking for, we got what your period? What are
you looking for? I don't know that shit is weird, but um yeah.
And also, you know, just peace to the miserable holes. You
know, I would hate to be y'all praying for y'all, hoping for the
best for y'all. I would hate to be a miserable ass bitch like that's
just such a sad life to live. But you know, I hope you
heal. I hope you heal, a baby girl. But yes, that's
all that I pretty much have for y'all. So I hope y'all enjoyed this
episode. I hope that y'all took something from this. Make sure that you
follow me on all platforms that healing my homies, black girl experience on TikTok.
Come see your girl at the Trap or wherever. Come get that yoga
session in all that good ship. That is all that I have for y'all.
I'm out.