WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.680 --> 00:00:07.519 This is the two seventeen Recovery Podcast with Corey Winfield. I think that's pretty 2 00:00:07.519 --> 00:00:11.000 fair for a guy once a quarter, four times a year, Trimanton Nails. 3 00:00:11.279 --> 00:00:12.800 If it needs to be done, it needs to be done it. 4 00:00:12.839 --> 00:00:15.839 I'll think you that you can go buy the calendar year. You probably wish 5 00:00:15.880 --> 00:00:19.519 I would, because I probably maybe really do it like twice a year and 6 00:00:19.879 --> 00:00:24.920 cold Marnie Winfield the people that really are drawn to twelve step program. One 7 00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:30.039 piece of those twelve step groups is because it's people from all different varieties in 8 00:00:30.160 --> 00:00:37.039 lengths of time of sobriety. It is the twenty sixth of August twenty twenty 9 00:00:37.039 --> 00:00:40.200 three. My name's Cory Winfield, my name's Marnie Winfield, and this is 10 00:00:40.240 --> 00:00:48.960 the two seventeen Recovery podcast, coming live recorded from the Mansion Studio. That's 11 00:00:49.039 --> 00:00:52.119 what you're calling it, Yeah, I think, or as we could call 12 00:00:52.159 --> 00:00:58.439 it the East Solide or the Home Studio or the Original probably just Home Studio 13 00:00:59.119 --> 00:01:03.000 from the Home Studio, the Original studio, or maybe I just don't even 14 00:01:03.039 --> 00:01:06.079 mention it, and I only mentioned it when I'm at the North Studio. 15 00:01:06.280 --> 00:01:08.120 Maybe we keep them think, keep them wondering. Maybe we get a South 16 00:01:08.159 --> 00:01:15.560 studio too. Maybe we have a north northeast Southwest studio. Never know, 17 00:01:17.920 --> 00:01:22.239 dreams come true. Speaking of dreams coming true, Yeah, we moved into 18 00:01:22.280 --> 00:01:27.280 a new home that we bought or something. Yeah, we had some people, 19 00:01:27.400 --> 00:01:30.280 like a bank or something like give us some money or something, and 20 00:01:30.359 --> 00:01:36.200 we like give that money somebody else. It was really weird. It's adulting. 21 00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:41.040 No, it's called being sober. Yeah, and that's what happens, 22 00:01:41.079 --> 00:01:45.359 man. And whether you listen to this podcast and you're recovery yourself, or 23 00:01:45.400 --> 00:01:49.959 you listening because you've got family or friends or something you're trying to get some 24 00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:52.799 advice, I mean, maybe you'll you'll catch something from us. I mean 25 00:01:53.640 --> 00:01:56.599 kind of what we talk about is our lives and recovery and things that we 26 00:01:56.680 --> 00:01:59.680 go through day to day. But this is just kind of a testament to 27 00:01:59.760 --> 00:02:01.920 it, you know, like the stuff that we've been doing, the goals 28 00:02:01.959 --> 00:02:05.840 that we've both had, and this was a goal that you had, a 29 00:02:05.879 --> 00:02:10.599 big goal that you had and here we are. You got some in the 30 00:02:10.599 --> 00:02:14.680 mail today that made your smile and I also proud of you you opened it. 31 00:02:15.080 --> 00:02:23.800 Yeah, yeah, I got my a congratulations note from MCBAB which is 32 00:02:23.840 --> 00:02:30.520 a Board of Professional Licensing Credentialing rather, so I'm a certified you know, 33 00:02:30.759 --> 00:02:36.479 drug and alcoholic counselor. Now, yeah, it's a pretty big deal. 34 00:02:36.599 --> 00:02:40.560 It's a big deal. Yeah, so I'm very excited. And it really 35 00:02:42.039 --> 00:02:45.639 was like I don't know, I mean, I knew I had passed the 36 00:02:45.639 --> 00:02:49.159 test. That was a big thing for me, Like, oh my gosh, 37 00:02:49.280 --> 00:02:54.240 talk about anxiety. But just to have that, like, you know, 38 00:02:54.520 --> 00:03:00.080 a letter of congratulations was pretty amazing. Who signed it, all of 39 00:03:00.159 --> 00:03:06.199 the all of the board of mcbab damn. So they were like thinking about 40 00:03:06.280 --> 00:03:10.759 you morning when Phil and they wrote sign their name. Yeah, it's pretty 41 00:03:10.759 --> 00:03:14.840 cool. It's pretty cool. So kind of a big deal. Now, 42 00:03:15.919 --> 00:03:21.000 yeah, a bunch of letters as from my name. Nice. So what 43 00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:23.560 does that mean? What do you mean? What is it like? The 44 00:03:23.599 --> 00:03:31.479 certification so basically, uh, well, the capacity that I'm working because they 45 00:03:31.560 --> 00:03:36.960 kind of everything kind of like it was like a perfect storm of accomplishments that 46 00:03:36.960 --> 00:03:39.319 happened in my life all at once. I have no idea why the time 47 00:03:39.439 --> 00:03:46.080 they work their two separate things. But graduating from you know, my my 48 00:03:46.120 --> 00:03:50.560 master's program, I am now a limited license master social worker, so I 49 00:03:50.599 --> 00:04:00.360 can work in the capacity of clinical therapist for any anywhere in Michigan where it's 50 00:04:00.360 --> 00:04:05.560 a private practice or an agency or whatever. It doesn't have to be substance 51 00:04:05.680 --> 00:04:15.000 used disorder either. That's just my niche obviously. But the McBath piece is 52 00:04:15.080 --> 00:04:18.240 a development program that I've been on for many, many years, you know, 53 00:04:18.279 --> 00:04:21.800 since I started with you know, the program that I am not or 54 00:04:21.839 --> 00:04:29.439 the agency that I'm with now. And basically it's you log in a bunch 55 00:04:29.480 --> 00:04:34.759 of supervision hours and a bunch of credits that you need to have, you 56 00:04:34.800 --> 00:04:39.839 know, in terms of going to workshops and and things like that, and 57 00:04:39.879 --> 00:04:46.319 then you take this big test and after that you know you're a Certified Alcohol 58 00:04:46.319 --> 00:04:51.480 and Drug counselor so CDC, which means you can do that without a limited 59 00:04:51.519 --> 00:04:56.240 license master social worker. Now I just happen to have both, so you 60 00:04:56.240 --> 00:05:00.279 get paid double. No, that is absolutely not true. Damn it would 61 00:05:00.319 --> 00:05:05.199 be nice, though. We shouldn't make that a law. Yeah, if 62 00:05:05.240 --> 00:05:09.680 you have both, you get paid double. I'm also a certified peer recovery 63 00:05:09.720 --> 00:05:14.000 coach, so get paid triple. I got lots of lots of credentials. 64 00:05:14.480 --> 00:05:23.199 Hell yeah, I'm sure certified in the assist suicide prevention stuff. I am, 65 00:05:23.279 --> 00:05:27.560 and I'm also got my just got my CPR certification as well. The 66 00:05:27.759 --> 00:05:31.680 zip block bags on bitch, but those things you cannot close. I can't. 67 00:05:32.000 --> 00:05:35.560 I can't. I lack in some departments still in this in this universe, 68 00:05:35.600 --> 00:05:39.519 it's kryptonite. Man, everybody's got it. I don't think I think 69 00:05:39.600 --> 00:05:43.920 that probably went over a bunch of fuel's heads just now. Probably she can't 70 00:05:43.920 --> 00:05:47.519 close the black you have this issue with. It's not so much zip well, 71 00:05:47.639 --> 00:05:53.439 it is supply bags and doors, automatic doors, exit venture doesn't matter 72 00:05:53.439 --> 00:05:56.600 if there's a sign, I swear I turned and you know how like this 73 00:05:56.639 --> 00:05:59.399 is so stereotypical and people used to say this all the time, like I 74 00:05:59.439 --> 00:06:03.879 had a blonde moment, which completely old school. Nobody says that anymore. 75 00:06:04.399 --> 00:06:09.519 But it's like that same thing, like really like how to how am I 76 00:06:09.600 --> 00:06:14.079 not? I can read? But I always try to go out to exit, 77 00:06:14.560 --> 00:06:19.560 especially at the Sutton's Bay Hansens all the time, and Tom's and grocery 78 00:06:19.560 --> 00:06:25.079 store doors are not good to me but very confusing. Yeah, and then 79 00:06:25.120 --> 00:06:30.639 like the stupid like you know, curl Cereal that has the you know, 80 00:06:30.319 --> 00:06:39.319 resealable bags. Those are bs because they're difficult and keep things fresh if you 81 00:06:39.480 --> 00:06:46.279 operate them correctly. And even the little chocolate almond coconut things that you get 82 00:06:46.319 --> 00:06:48.879 from Cosco, I don't know. I don't know what's wrong, Like these 83 00:06:48.920 --> 00:06:54.639 taste better if you don't zip them up. And even I really do make 84 00:06:54.680 --> 00:06:57.000 an effort, I really do, and at first I'm like, maybe I'm 85 00:06:57.000 --> 00:07:00.879 just impatient, Like maybe I just I'm like, effort. Whatever. It's 86 00:07:00.920 --> 00:07:06.639 good enough going to school, being awesome, passing exams, doing tests, 87 00:07:08.040 --> 00:07:12.519 Oh, can't, can't clese them zip black nail it, but kryptonite. 88 00:07:13.639 --> 00:07:16.240 I don't know, but you know what, I'll take it because everybody's got 89 00:07:16.319 --> 00:07:21.959 their things and whatever, and you love me anyways, absolutely, Like that's 90 00:07:23.160 --> 00:07:27.199 many people are now listening. I'm fully my wife at that fall man. 91 00:07:29.399 --> 00:07:30.839 Oh no, I'm sure I have many others, but that's the one. 92 00:07:30.879 --> 00:07:35.399 It's just it's it's comical because I can't I don't know. I don't know 93 00:07:35.839 --> 00:07:41.079 what it is. I think you get it from your father. Maybe yeah, 94 00:07:41.199 --> 00:07:46.959 that's probably it, or maybe your mom maybe not sure, but no, 95 00:07:46.199 --> 00:07:50.000 congratulations though I didn't mean to throw the zip black back. You think, 96 00:07:50.120 --> 00:07:56.879 but it's just it's just cute and you're just such an awesome person. 97 00:07:56.920 --> 00:08:00.240 And the things that you have been doing in your life since you've been over 98 00:08:00.360 --> 00:08:03.399 and even before you know when you're on your path. And that's something that 99 00:08:03.439 --> 00:08:07.199 I think we should probably talk about more. Is that time where we are 100 00:08:07.319 --> 00:08:11.360 trying to put it together. It's just not connecting, you know, we're 101 00:08:11.360 --> 00:08:15.079 still trying to do it our way, still trying to keep it in the 102 00:08:15.120 --> 00:08:16.240 back of our mind. Well, I can drink one day, I can 103 00:08:16.319 --> 00:08:22.279 use drugs again one day, but we have that clean time where we will 104 00:08:22.279 --> 00:08:26.600 start working towards something usually and things will start going okay, but they never 105 00:08:28.000 --> 00:08:33.919 quite click because we never can close the door on our using days, you 106 00:08:33.919 --> 00:08:41.399 know. But but you can still progress in those times. And I remember 107 00:08:41.480 --> 00:08:46.480 it would be so frustrating for me because they would say, well, your 108 00:08:46.480 --> 00:08:48.440 brain's not totally healed, you know for two years until it you know, 109 00:08:48.519 --> 00:08:52.120 you stopped drinking for two years. And I'd be like, well, look, 110 00:08:52.120 --> 00:08:54.039 I had three months in there. I had a couple of weeks in 111 00:08:54.080 --> 00:08:56.279 there that I had another month, and I had a couple more weeks, 112 00:08:56.320 --> 00:09:01.360 and you know that time should account for something. It's not like like, 113 00:09:01.519 --> 00:09:05.519 okay, when I was on zoloft. They're Nobody told me at first, 114 00:09:05.559 --> 00:09:07.320 like, hey, it takes four weeks for that stuff to kick in. 115 00:09:07.960 --> 00:09:11.919 And second, if you drink again, it takes it back to zero. 116 00:09:13.600 --> 00:09:16.399 You know, it starts to clock over, like it's going to take another 117 00:09:16.399 --> 00:09:18.279 four weeks for it to kick in. No one told me that either. 118 00:09:18.799 --> 00:09:22.799 So I'm sitting there thinking this this pilled a new work. Well, no, 119 00:09:24.159 --> 00:09:28.960 it wasn't because I kept drinking right, you know, and it was 120 00:09:28.039 --> 00:09:31.759 very frustrating. So it's not like that, you know, I would my 121 00:09:31.759 --> 00:09:35.720 brain is not just gonna automatically go oh, let's go back to twoy fifteen 122 00:09:35.799 --> 00:09:41.360 corey brain. No, because I've had some healing in there, and it 123 00:09:41.399 --> 00:09:43.279 would always frustrate me when I would bring that up and people would just kind 124 00:09:43.279 --> 00:09:46.360 of shrug their shoulders or you know, kind of poopoo it, you know, 125 00:09:46.399 --> 00:09:48.639 and I'd be like, no, man, like my brain is healing, 126 00:09:50.879 --> 00:09:56.039 but I don't know. That's not good. I'm proud of you and 127 00:09:56.759 --> 00:10:01.519 if you inspired me and you are an inspiration and for the whole generation of 128 00:10:01.519 --> 00:10:07.799 women, you get what I'm saying. Yeah, just to comment real quick 129 00:10:07.840 --> 00:10:13.039 on that, because you really spelled it. Out almost exactly how what happened 130 00:10:13.080 --> 00:10:20.720 with me when I got sober in two thousand and seven, and it was 131 00:10:20.720 --> 00:10:24.200 through the court system, like I was on probation, and you know, 132 00:10:24.679 --> 00:10:28.759 and I'm not saying that that that there was a lot of growth there. 133 00:10:28.879 --> 00:10:31.080 There was a lot of learning. There was a lot of growth. There 134 00:10:31.120 --> 00:10:37.279 was a lot of soul searching and recognition of like things I was doing wrong 135 00:10:37.320 --> 00:10:41.120 and what I needed to do right. But this just goes to the whole. 136 00:10:41.600 --> 00:10:43.960 It's a freaking disease and it's cunning, baffling, powerful, and you 137 00:10:43.960 --> 00:10:50.840 know, And it was during that time that I actually started my master's program. 138 00:10:50.879 --> 00:10:56.720 So I started grad school back in two thousand and seven, and I 139 00:10:56.759 --> 00:11:03.120 took classes for over a year and and I was doing an excellent I was 140 00:11:03.159 --> 00:11:09.240 doing awesome addum. And when I relapsed, and I've shared this before on 141 00:11:09.279 --> 00:11:13.039 the podcast, is that I was like, I will not I'm not going 142 00:11:13.120 --> 00:11:18.240 to fail class, Like I'm in a place right now that is not good 143 00:11:18.279 --> 00:11:22.639 and not healthy, and I'm not gonna be able to fake this, Like 144 00:11:22.759 --> 00:11:26.200 I'm not going to just keep rolling with this like everything's okay, because it's 145 00:11:26.200 --> 00:11:31.840 not. And so then in the back of my head's like I'll just get 146 00:11:31.879 --> 00:11:37.120 back to it when I you know, get my shit together. And how 147 00:11:37.159 --> 00:11:39.600 long did it take me? And I just said two thousand and sevens when 148 00:11:39.639 --> 00:11:46.440 I started it, so as a minute as a minute. Do I feel 149 00:11:46.440 --> 00:11:50.440 like it's that it was less earned? Absolutely not. In fact, I 150 00:11:50.480 --> 00:11:54.600 actually had to do more work in order to actually get my degree in terms 151 00:11:54.600 --> 00:12:00.360 of retaking some of the credits that I had already taken. But it worth 152 00:12:00.399 --> 00:12:03.159 it. Absolutely. I'd like to think that I inspired you to go back 153 00:12:03.200 --> 00:12:09.200 to school. You did because you saw that BS crap I was taken and 154 00:12:09.200 --> 00:12:11.000 you're like, you know what, idiot, if you can do it and 155 00:12:11.039 --> 00:12:13.480 I can do it? No, that was that was that. That was 156 00:12:13.519 --> 00:12:18.279 that thing even in my even doesn't matter if I was sober or if I 157 00:12:18.320 --> 00:12:22.279 was sober or not, it was always something that weighed on me. That 158 00:12:22.440 --> 00:12:26.559 was like in like my gut, like in the back of my head, 159 00:12:26.120 --> 00:12:31.679 just sitting there like why, Like, I know, you didn't waste that 160 00:12:31.759 --> 00:12:37.200 time, like you you chose to pursue that for a reason, and you're 161 00:12:37.240 --> 00:12:39.639 good enough and you can do it. Why can't you just do it? 162 00:12:39.840 --> 00:12:43.480 Like you know, even when I was when I was drinking. I was 163 00:12:43.519 --> 00:12:46.600 like, I know I can do this, I just am not in the 164 00:12:46.639 --> 00:12:50.320 spot right now or I can. I'll just wait till I am and waiting, 165 00:12:50.440 --> 00:12:54.519 waiting, waiting. Then got sober for a little bit, but not 166 00:12:54.600 --> 00:12:58.919 long enough to actually get back to school reapply, you know. So it 167 00:12:58.039 --> 00:13:05.159 was it's been a journey. It's been a journey. So yeah, and 168 00:13:05.200 --> 00:13:09.200 then a lot of people aren't afraid too, because you had student loans out 169 00:13:09.200 --> 00:13:13.080 there and you couldn't afford to just hey, here, I'm going to start 170 00:13:13.080 --> 00:13:18.440 paying for classes and COVID was going on. Still, Oh my gosh, 171 00:13:18.480 --> 00:13:20.360 there was a ton of l leg work that had to be done because when 172 00:13:20.360 --> 00:13:24.320 you're in default, which I had been, because I didn't pay attention to 173 00:13:24.399 --> 00:13:31.320 anything any responsibilities financial or otherwise in terms of you know that piece. So 174 00:13:31.360 --> 00:13:35.559 when it came around to reapplying for student loans, they're like, nope, 175 00:13:35.600 --> 00:13:37.759 you've been in default. This is what you need to do to get out 176 00:13:37.799 --> 00:13:41.919 of default. And that was the whole thing, you know, And so 177 00:13:41.840 --> 00:13:48.480 even just getting back into school took a lot of work. But oh man, 178 00:13:48.000 --> 00:13:58.440 yeah, so I am done with my collegiate responsibilities and I'm grateful and 179 00:13:58.559 --> 00:14:05.600 I am elated and I'm excited to put it all to use. A good 180 00:14:05.679 --> 00:14:09.159 job. Thanks, And I wanted to make an announcement as well. I 181 00:14:09.200 --> 00:14:18.840 am done with my collegiate career. It's because I failed so many glasses and 182 00:14:18.960 --> 00:14:22.279 you can't do that so many times. Yeah, so I'm done too. 183 00:14:22.399 --> 00:14:26.639 I just wanted to throw out there. But here's the thing, honey, 184 00:14:26.879 --> 00:14:31.600 and everyone who's listening, everybody has different skill sets, and just because in 185 00:14:31.679 --> 00:14:39.600 agreed does not make anybody smarter than another person. People are knowledgeable and skilled 186 00:14:39.720 --> 00:14:45.679 at things like I look at people like, I don't know. Let me 187 00:14:45.679 --> 00:14:52.000 think it's like a welder, right, or I'm sorry texting people. No, 188 00:14:54.320 --> 00:14:58.120 So like think of like a welder, right, somebody like that's a 189 00:14:58.200 --> 00:15:03.120 skill. That's something I have not a clue how to do that. Wouldn't 190 00:15:03.159 --> 00:15:05.279 know the first thing about it. Definitely wouldn't know how to do it well. 191 00:15:07.279 --> 00:15:09.000 And there's a lot of the pieces that go into and a lot of 192 00:15:09.080 --> 00:15:13.679 learning that needs to happen to have that to be good at it, you 193 00:15:13.759 --> 00:15:18.000 know, and so and what you do, I could never do that, 194 00:15:18.840 --> 00:15:22.639 and you learned all that not through you. Well, I don't know what 195 00:15:22.720 --> 00:15:26.840 you're going to call it the School of Winfield. What do you what do 196 00:15:26.879 --> 00:15:33.679 you call that learning core program? But I should learn how to take student 197 00:15:33.720 --> 00:15:37.720 loan money and I can scam people, and not saying college is a scam 198 00:15:37.720 --> 00:15:41.120 because you do learn stuff there. But like you just said, welding, 199 00:15:41.440 --> 00:15:46.159 you know, someone who can get an apprenticeship and become a welder, you 200 00:15:46.200 --> 00:15:48.159 know, like, yeah, there's some schooling they want you to do, 201 00:15:48.200 --> 00:15:50.360 and that goes along with it, but most of it you're learning on the 202 00:15:50.440 --> 00:15:56.840 job because you're doing it. And therapy might be a little tough one to 203 00:15:56.960 --> 00:16:00.679 learn on the on the fly. On the job it comes in, you're 204 00:16:00.679 --> 00:16:03.080 like effort. Next thing, you know, something bad happens, You're like, 205 00:16:03.120 --> 00:16:04.639 well, let me write that one down to tell him not to do 206 00:16:04.759 --> 00:16:10.840 that again, you know a b. Yeah, So there's a lot of 207 00:16:10.840 --> 00:16:14.240 cool things you can learn, you know, at college, but I think 208 00:16:14.279 --> 00:16:17.600 for the most part, you know a lot of stuff you could learn on 209 00:16:17.639 --> 00:16:22.360 the job and you know, actually doing it and practicing it. And and 210 00:16:22.919 --> 00:16:26.360 I think the part because I thought I was going to be a drug counselor 211 00:16:26.399 --> 00:16:29.080 and I was going to go back to school for that, because I thought 212 00:16:29.080 --> 00:16:30.559 you had to go to school for it. And like you said, you 213 00:16:30.600 --> 00:16:34.240 know you got your c ADC and that's what it's called, right, and 214 00:16:34.519 --> 00:16:37.799 you don't have to go to school for that. You just have to work 215 00:16:37.799 --> 00:16:42.000 at an agency that that what that offers? How how can someone get to 216 00:16:42.039 --> 00:16:47.919 see a DC? How can we offer that to our employees? That piece 217 00:16:48.759 --> 00:16:52.159 in terms of in terms of two seventeen offering it, I I can't speak 218 00:16:52.200 --> 00:16:57.639 to that piece. I had to because you have to be under the supervision 219 00:16:57.679 --> 00:17:03.399 of a MSW within the agency, and you have to have X amount of 220 00:17:03.480 --> 00:17:10.000 supervised hours while you're actually providing services. And then you're also responsible for a 221 00:17:10.079 --> 00:17:18.920 ton of credits that you need to get through like continuing education credits, which 222 00:17:18.480 --> 00:17:22.799 you can do that you can pay for those. Anybody who's anybody can go 223 00:17:22.839 --> 00:17:25.839 to those. But whether you but you have to be in a development program 224 00:17:25.880 --> 00:17:29.279 which needs to be set up by the agency. You know, you can 225 00:17:29.319 --> 00:17:32.839 look into it. I mean I'm not saying no, I don't. I 226 00:17:32.839 --> 00:17:37.119 don't know the answer to that. Tell me I can't do it that way, 227 00:17:37.119 --> 00:17:40.200 I'll do it. No, But that's seriously, that's something I want 228 00:17:40.200 --> 00:17:42.839 to look into, you know, because the guy know, the guys that 229 00:17:42.880 --> 00:17:47.599 work for two seventeen recovery. I want to give them something to work for, 230 00:17:48.039 --> 00:17:49.599 you know, And that's something I told them when they started. It's 231 00:17:49.640 --> 00:17:52.759 like, look now, I want you guys to achieve things. I want 232 00:17:52.799 --> 00:17:56.920 you guys to reach your goals. And you know, the stuff they're doing 233 00:17:56.920 --> 00:18:00.680 it I think is huge. And I think what we're doing as an agency, 234 00:18:00.039 --> 00:18:06.039 as an organization, as a nonprofit is it's pretty important for people right 235 00:18:06.039 --> 00:18:11.039 now. Once we have cars that drive themselves, it's a whole different story. 236 00:18:11.559 --> 00:18:15.039 I say we're about well to have them now. I guess in bigger 237 00:18:15.079 --> 00:18:19.240 cities that will take people like ubers, you just jump in and there's somebody 238 00:18:19.319 --> 00:18:22.000 driving. I don't know if I would take one of those, I'd be 239 00:18:22.039 --> 00:18:26.799 weird at out. But if it means no drunk drivings and stuff, I 240 00:18:26.839 --> 00:18:33.079 mean we're heading that way. I like driving, so it's gonna be it's 241 00:18:33.079 --> 00:18:37.880 gonna be weird to just get in a car and be like, all right, 242 00:18:37.240 --> 00:18:42.160 take me to LA right. I wonder how long that would take. 243 00:18:42.680 --> 00:18:47.960 But the whole piece of why our transportation is so different, why our service 244 00:18:48.039 --> 00:18:52.519 is so different, is because it's recovery coaching. Would we could just do 245 00:18:52.559 --> 00:18:57.279 that from home, zoom in. Hey buddy, how are you feeling today? 246 00:18:57.000 --> 00:19:03.359 But not in our not our lifetimes? Will that happen? I don't 247 00:19:03.400 --> 00:19:14.319 know. I mean maybe, but we're not that old, are we. 248 00:19:15.519 --> 00:19:18.720 I'm just saying I don't know. Yeah, just give me pulsive yeah, 249 00:19:18.599 --> 00:19:26.400 because back in nineteen eighty we were just little kids. You're ten. I 250 00:19:26.519 --> 00:19:30.519 was twelve nineteen eighty I was born. Oh okay, that's right, I 251 00:19:30.559 --> 00:19:41.559 was two. Math it's my kryptonite. No, okay, so let's go 252 00:19:41.599 --> 00:19:44.920 eighty nine, ninety, let's go ninety. Okay, I was twelve, 253 00:19:45.240 --> 00:19:48.880 you were ten. And if I would have said, hey, travel back 254 00:19:48.880 --> 00:19:51.839 in time and go, hey here you're going. Is this gonna be your 255 00:19:51.839 --> 00:19:55.720 phone? I'm on my phone? Oh we're talking about like, oh yeah, 256 00:19:55.759 --> 00:19:57.960 it's computer too, like a computer, right? I mean I play 257 00:19:59.039 --> 00:20:03.279 pong on there, right, play family feud? No, you're right, 258 00:20:03.519 --> 00:20:07.599 I mean, how do like what the hell really? Or? Right? 259 00:20:07.920 --> 00:20:11.920 So the technology that we have today, even in cars, I don't know, 260 00:20:12.480 --> 00:20:18.680 and they already have it that it's happening now. How affordable will be 261 00:20:18.960 --> 00:20:22.000 I don't know, because would you need to own a car if you didn't 262 00:20:22.000 --> 00:20:27.640 even get to drive it? Like I don't even know. Man, you 263 00:20:27.720 --> 00:20:33.359 rent it, you just pay for your ride to work every day. I 264 00:20:33.400 --> 00:20:34.960 don't because if you think about it, if you buy a car, that's 265 00:20:36.000 --> 00:20:38.640 forty thousand dollars, right, So I'm the kind of medium and I guess 266 00:20:38.640 --> 00:20:42.559 you'd say, I'd want to say high end, but I don't know, 267 00:20:44.319 --> 00:20:48.279 just throwing numbers out there. And you had that car form I don't know, 268 00:20:48.599 --> 00:20:52.039 five years, how much would you pay, Like if you had to 269 00:20:52.079 --> 00:20:53.960 go to work today, like like every day, how much would you pay 270 00:20:55.000 --> 00:21:00.039 to actually have that car? Am I making any sense whatsoever? Am I 271 00:21:00.119 --> 00:21:04.799 just time traveling in my own brain to the future. I don't know, 272 00:21:07.880 --> 00:21:11.000 but it would but everything would be uber like like it's not your vehicle, 273 00:21:11.519 --> 00:21:15.279 you're picked up by another see. That would just be inconvenient, I think. 274 00:21:15.319 --> 00:21:18.480 So, I mean when we're in Seattle. I don't know. It 275 00:21:18.559 --> 00:21:23.240 seems to me like there's something about something about ownership and respond like your own 276 00:21:25.519 --> 00:21:33.240 personal I don't know. It just takes it takes away the of like I 277 00:21:33.240 --> 00:21:37.839 don't want to say, power of having like your own choices. But it 278 00:21:37.880 --> 00:21:44.119 is like I'm gonna go then go, not like I'm gonna call for you 279 00:21:44.160 --> 00:21:45.640 know, like if you get in a fight and you're like, I'm out 280 00:21:45.640 --> 00:21:51.200 of here, and then you're like, call my car. Yeah. And 281 00:21:51.559 --> 00:21:55.720 if everybody had the right to their own car, like not the right, 282 00:21:55.799 --> 00:22:03.759 but whatever's gonna happen in this world. If someone was like, Okay, 283 00:22:03.799 --> 00:22:06.680 well I'm gonna get me one of them new cars that can drive themselves, 284 00:22:07.440 --> 00:22:12.480 but they're still gonna like tweak it and modify it where it goes ten miles 285 00:22:12.480 --> 00:22:15.359 an hour faster when I was supposed to. I mean, there's always gonna 286 00:22:15.400 --> 00:22:19.119 be that if people own their own. But if there was just cars where 287 00:22:19.240 --> 00:22:22.519 like say say Trevor's City was like, hey, you need to go anywhere, 288 00:22:22.640 --> 00:22:26.200 you just die this number and a car will be there within five minutes 289 00:22:26.240 --> 00:22:30.319 and pick you up. Don't have to pay anything for it, just taxes. 290 00:22:33.720 --> 00:22:38.599 I don't know. Wouldn't that be better now that you know many cars 291 00:22:38.640 --> 00:22:41.640 that would be flying around here? How many little kids would be like, 292 00:22:41.720 --> 00:22:48.720 hey, I need some gum? And then you'd have to people going, 293 00:22:48.079 --> 00:22:51.640 oh, big brothers watching me. They know when I go over to Darryl's 294 00:22:51.640 --> 00:22:57.799 house, I'm scoring a bag. You know, I'm walking. I don't 295 00:22:57.799 --> 00:23:02.000 know, I'm gonna ride my bus cool? Like you know, people would 296 00:23:02.599 --> 00:23:06.920 people would rebel because they would they would get your credit card, they would 297 00:23:06.960 --> 00:23:08.440 know you, they would know where you're going, they would know everything about 298 00:23:08.480 --> 00:23:12.880 you. Yeah, and there's a lot of people that go hail to the 299 00:23:12.960 --> 00:23:19.920 no's Nope. Like I said, it takes the personal piece out of it, 300 00:23:21.519 --> 00:23:25.799 like your ownership of where you're going, when you're going, who knows 301 00:23:25.839 --> 00:23:30.720 you're going when you're coming back? All that? Yeah, who would I 302 00:23:30.759 --> 00:23:33.400 be flipping off? Now? Who would I be? Given the corey too? 303 00:23:37.240 --> 00:23:42.200 Ah, it's this I don't know. We've been stressed out pretty hardcore 304 00:23:42.319 --> 00:23:47.759 the last like month or two or three. Yeah, And that's so true. 305 00:23:48.119 --> 00:23:52.000 No matter how stressed I get, it's still not worth it to drink. 306 00:23:53.960 --> 00:23:59.319 And we had a moment today where we went to a shop and they 307 00:23:59.359 --> 00:24:02.119 had it wasn't like a weed chop or anything, but we just went to 308 00:24:02.200 --> 00:24:07.039 a place and they had CBD stuff there and it was like CBD sleep pills 309 00:24:07.119 --> 00:24:11.839 And how do you know that? I have hard time sleeping sometimes and I 310 00:24:11.880 --> 00:24:15.920 have no idea why if my brain is just going, going going. Sometimes 311 00:24:15.920 --> 00:24:21.240 the pain I'll have back pain and that'll keep me up and I just it's 312 00:24:21.359 --> 00:24:25.319 one thing or another. So you saw this, They're like huh. And 313 00:24:25.359 --> 00:24:30.920 then the lady brought up gummies THHC gummies and I'm like yeah. She's like, 314 00:24:30.960 --> 00:24:33.039 no, I just eat half a one, and then she's like, 315 00:24:33.079 --> 00:24:34.440 sometimes eat one. I'm like, yeah, but don't you get like a 316 00:24:34.440 --> 00:24:37.640 little buzzed off that. Don't you get a little high. She's like, 317 00:24:37.640 --> 00:24:38.440 if I eat half a one, no, but if I eat a whole 318 00:24:38.440 --> 00:24:41.240 one, yeah, and then it just knocks me right out. I fall 319 00:24:41.279 --> 00:24:44.240 asleep. And I was like, yeah, Sam in recovery. And then 320 00:24:44.279 --> 00:24:45.920 she's like, oh no, no, no, then you don't want to 321 00:24:45.960 --> 00:24:48.240 do that. And I was like no. And some people that are in 322 00:24:48.279 --> 00:24:52.039 recovery do they still smoke weed and they're like, I'm in recovery chief and 323 00:24:52.079 --> 00:24:56.200 down They're like because that wasn't my drug of choice. But for me, 324 00:24:56.480 --> 00:25:00.599 I have tried smoking weed as a replacement and it led me right back to 325 00:25:00.640 --> 00:25:03.880 alcohol. So I told the lady that it's it's not worth it. And 326 00:25:04.000 --> 00:25:06.960 I was like, if I eat one of those gummies and it makes me 327 00:25:07.079 --> 00:25:11.519 high and right, then I'm not thinking clear right. And people can say 328 00:25:11.559 --> 00:25:14.680 whatever they want about weed. Oh yeah, but it's just it's from the 329 00:25:14.720 --> 00:25:17.920 earth where no, no, when when you were smoking weed, when you're 330 00:25:17.920 --> 00:25:22.519 eating gummies, you are not in the right frame of mind. It's facts. 331 00:25:23.000 --> 00:25:30.759 And if that even one percent chance led me back to alcohol, it's 332 00:25:30.799 --> 00:25:33.279 just not worth it, right, So no, thanks, I'll pass on 333 00:25:33.359 --> 00:25:36.839 that, you know. So I kind of told her, but it was 334 00:25:36.920 --> 00:25:41.839 just it's just one of those things that you know, And I told her, 335 00:25:41.400 --> 00:25:45.039 you know, if I ate a gummy and then you know, I'm 336 00:25:45.079 --> 00:25:48.319 sitting around the house and you take it off to work and I'm like, 337 00:25:48.480 --> 00:25:52.359 hmmm, I could probably do a pint right now. No, no, 338 00:25:52.799 --> 00:25:56.960 you know, and then I go do that and the whole thing is done, 339 00:25:56.960 --> 00:26:00.599 you know, everything I've worked hard for the last five years, you 340 00:26:00.640 --> 00:26:03.079 know, and it would just be over and to me that it's just not 341 00:26:03.119 --> 00:26:07.480 worth it to get a little buzz, you know, even off of weed 342 00:26:07.200 --> 00:26:10.240 if it yeah, it's just it's just not worth it, you know. 343 00:26:10.279 --> 00:26:14.400 But some people they just they can do that, I guess. And I'm 344 00:26:14.400 --> 00:26:17.880 not trying to be in recovery for everybody else. I'm just trying to be 345 00:26:17.960 --> 00:26:21.839 in recovery for myself so that I can be here for you and you know, 346 00:26:22.000 --> 00:26:25.640 our future and the things that we still have planned and the huge goals 347 00:26:25.640 --> 00:26:30.359 that we still have, huge personal goals. And I just want to say 348 00:26:30.400 --> 00:26:37.960 something real quick though, because our new studio is set up way different. 349 00:26:41.759 --> 00:26:44.480 I'm still looking at my computer screen on my left. I have the board 350 00:26:44.480 --> 00:26:48.759 in front of me, and I can actually see the fireplace now. The 351 00:26:48.799 --> 00:26:53.400 fireplace is in front of me in the corner. And you were kind of 352 00:26:53.440 --> 00:26:57.559 where the fireplace was before and I could kind of see you and I could 353 00:26:57.640 --> 00:27:03.640 see you, but now you're directly across from me about would you say, 354 00:27:03.720 --> 00:27:08.119 seven feet away, so it feels like you're so far away. And then 355 00:27:08.160 --> 00:27:11.839 once we have better lighting in here, then I'll be able to see your 356 00:27:11.920 --> 00:27:15.599 face. You'll be can you see my face? Yeah? Okay, yeah, 357 00:27:15.640 --> 00:27:19.319 because I have the computer screen like blaring at me here, but like 358 00:27:19.359 --> 00:27:22.799 you're like dark, and then we're gonna have like the TV over there too, 359 00:27:22.839 --> 00:27:29.480 and it'll be pretty cool down here. Yeah, And the cats aren't 360 00:27:29.480 --> 00:27:34.240 scratching at the door because there it's not in the area. I think it's 361 00:27:34.319 --> 00:27:40.359 pretty cool. Like it's funny because when we looked at this place, which 362 00:27:41.079 --> 00:27:47.000 just everybody knows that well, everybody knows that the housing crisis is crazy everywhere, 363 00:27:47.160 --> 00:27:48.839 right, And then you get in a place like where we live in 364 00:27:48.920 --> 00:27:53.200 Traverse City, which is like a tourist town, so people have their vacation 365 00:27:53.279 --> 00:27:59.279 homes here, which ups the demand house demand for housing, et cetera, 366 00:27:59.359 --> 00:28:02.200 et cetera. So when we were looking at this place that was in our 367 00:28:02.240 --> 00:28:07.359 price range, you know, with a loan obviously, and you have to 368 00:28:07.400 --> 00:28:10.640 really think outside the box, like, you know, there's things that we 369 00:28:10.680 --> 00:28:14.200 want, there's things that we knew we didn't want, there's things that would 370 00:28:14.200 --> 00:28:18.559 be ideal, and so on and so forth. And so your studio was 371 00:28:18.599 --> 00:28:22.279 a big thing because that's a big part of you, and so we knew 372 00:28:22.279 --> 00:28:26.720 we needed a space for that, and so every place we looked at it 373 00:28:26.799 --> 00:28:32.400 was like, is there another room for the studio? We need a room 374 00:28:32.480 --> 00:28:36.599 for the studio. But then it got down to it and we found this 375 00:28:36.640 --> 00:28:41.960 place and it was like, not exactly a room, but there's a space 376 00:28:41.039 --> 00:28:48.359 for it. So and it's it's pretty amazing. And I figured my next 377 00:28:48.440 --> 00:28:52.400 purchase that I want maybe for Christmas, I'm gonna get one of those fitbit 378 00:28:52.640 --> 00:28:59.039 watches so I can figure out how many stairs, how many steps I take 379 00:28:59.079 --> 00:29:03.880 in a day when I'm just at home because I literally immigranted removing, so 380 00:29:03.960 --> 00:29:07.319 there's a lot of like, you know, putting away and like put me 381 00:29:07.400 --> 00:29:12.519 in. You know, you forget your cell phone when you're when you're down, 382 00:29:12.640 --> 00:29:19.839 when you've been known in the finished basement, you're gonna be going six 383 00:29:19.880 --> 00:29:27.119 flights three flights of stairs. Yeah, I've been winded. I get upstairs 384 00:29:27.200 --> 00:29:29.920 and I'm like, can I come right back and get back? I'm like 385 00:29:30.960 --> 00:29:34.319 like this is good for me. And then get in there in the bedroom, 386 00:29:34.359 --> 00:29:38.599 I'm like, oh, where's my phone? Yeah, I didn't leave 387 00:29:38.599 --> 00:29:47.000 it downstairs. There's a downstairs downstairs. It's not that bad. I don't 388 00:29:47.000 --> 00:29:52.799 even need that phone right now. Yeah, it's bad though, but it's 389 00:29:52.839 --> 00:29:55.759 not that bad. But yeah, and when you forget your phone, it's 390 00:29:55.799 --> 00:29:56.960 not just like, oh did I leave it in the other room. It's 391 00:29:57.000 --> 00:30:00.799 like that I leave it out on the other floor. It it's like Seattle 392 00:30:00.839 --> 00:30:03.920 all over again. Oh my god. See you were practicing, That's what 393 00:30:03.960 --> 00:30:07.599 it was. It was. It was your training, jezus. It was 394 00:30:07.599 --> 00:30:11.880 your training for moving into your new home. If you Seattle, No, 395 00:30:12.039 --> 00:30:15.720 Seattle was all right, Saddle was pretty cool. It was. It was 396 00:30:15.759 --> 00:30:22.680 a good experience. Was that, Oh, that's cool. I don't know 397 00:30:22.680 --> 00:30:27.599 if you heard that that air purified are air purifier? I was like, 398 00:30:27.640 --> 00:30:33.519 what the hell like looking around like spaceships are coming, cants are coming down 399 00:30:33.519 --> 00:30:37.960 now, like what you guys, Okay, don't here. Yeah, that's 400 00:30:37.960 --> 00:30:41.000 crazy. Okay, so we'll have to move that. That's cool, but 401 00:30:41.160 --> 00:30:45.079 those are little things that we're going to figure out. And then I wasn't 402 00:30:45.079 --> 00:30:47.559 sure if I was going to bring the soundproofing stuff, but I can hear 403 00:30:47.559 --> 00:30:48.960 a kind of like a little echo kind of a bit, so I think 404 00:30:48.960 --> 00:30:52.640 we do need to keep some stuff from bouncing around off the walls. But 405 00:30:53.799 --> 00:30:57.359 it'll be fun to decorate this. And it was kind of sad because today 406 00:30:57.359 --> 00:31:02.119 we went to the old place and we were cleaning it out and I was 407 00:31:02.160 --> 00:31:06.880 walking back and I was taking all the the soundproofing off the wall and the 408 00:31:06.920 --> 00:31:11.759 old studio, and I just remember how geeked I was to even have a 409 00:31:11.880 --> 00:31:18.200 studio and how awesome that was, because it's not that we don't care about 410 00:31:18.200 --> 00:31:19.559 the podcast. We still do. It's it's a big part of what we 411 00:31:19.680 --> 00:31:26.440 do. But it was just such a come up for me to go from 412 00:31:26.480 --> 00:31:32.119 these little bitty little microphones to like you allowing me to have one of the 413 00:31:32.160 --> 00:31:37.400 bedrooms as an office and you know, a studio, and it was just 414 00:31:38.440 --> 00:31:42.960 it was crazy to see how far we have come and we're just scratching the 415 00:31:44.000 --> 00:31:47.799 surface. It feels like, you know. And if you'd ask me, 416 00:31:47.839 --> 00:31:48.759 then I'd be like, yeah, we're doing good, you know, we 417 00:31:48.799 --> 00:31:52.720 are, And he asked me in a year, you know, and I 418 00:31:52.720 --> 00:31:56.319 hopefully we'll say, oh yeah, yeah. I remember we were so excited 419 00:31:56.400 --> 00:32:00.480 moving and now we have an airplane that we probably from and if car that 420 00:32:00.519 --> 00:32:06.279 just drives us around. But I was walking down the hall too, and 421 00:32:06.319 --> 00:32:08.039 I remember like in the bathroom. I don't know why, but it just 422 00:32:09.480 --> 00:32:15.559 I remember our wedding day. And I did a podcast on our wedding day, 423 00:32:15.640 --> 00:32:19.400 which would have been the twelfth of December twenty twenty. And go back 424 00:32:19.400 --> 00:32:22.480 and listen to it if you want. It's on the app or on the 425 00:32:22.480 --> 00:32:28.400 website to seventeen Recovery dot com, whatever it's easier for you. But I 426 00:32:28.480 --> 00:32:30.960 remember like doing that podcast, and I remember like getting ready and taking a 427 00:32:31.000 --> 00:32:37.000 shower and and just like look in the mirror and then it's like starts snowing, 428 00:32:37.200 --> 00:32:39.519 and it was just beautiful, and you know, like those memories of 429 00:32:39.559 --> 00:32:43.599 that place, like is it the best place in the world. No, 430 00:32:43.759 --> 00:32:45.240 it's not the worst either, you know, but just the memories that we 431 00:32:45.400 --> 00:32:50.359 made there, and you know, the good times, the bad times, 432 00:32:50.440 --> 00:32:55.359 the very traumatic times. You know. I remember the time when you had 433 00:32:55.400 --> 00:33:00.759 your back problem. I was at COVID and were mad that I didn't carry 434 00:33:00.799 --> 00:33:05.640 you out, like I don't know, but but you were in so much 435 00:33:05.680 --> 00:33:07.920 pain, you know, Like I remember those times. And then you know, 436 00:33:07.000 --> 00:33:10.279 like there's other times too that I'm not going to mention, but it 437 00:33:10.440 --> 00:33:14.880 was just like I remember all those times. And then last Christmas, we 438 00:33:14.920 --> 00:33:20.920 were just cuddled up on the big chair there and watching that Ryan Reynolds Christmas 439 00:33:21.359 --> 00:33:25.480 sing Along musical, you know, which wasn't that bad, but the musicals 440 00:33:25.480 --> 00:33:29.039 really aren't my thing. But you wanted to watch it, and I watched 441 00:33:29.079 --> 00:33:30.599 it with you, and it was it was fun and it was like it 442 00:33:30.720 --> 00:33:34.640 was memories, you know, And those are the memories that we can make 443 00:33:34.720 --> 00:33:38.599 when we're sober. Yeah, those are things that we remember, you know. 444 00:33:38.440 --> 00:33:43.759 And I have tons and tons more memories from from that place. Remember, 445 00:33:43.839 --> 00:33:45.680 we moved in and it was just like, wow, this place is 446 00:33:45.720 --> 00:33:49.079 really how excited we were and how lucky we were to even get that place 447 00:33:49.720 --> 00:33:53.440 because again COVID was going on, and how our friends helped us move in 448 00:33:53.440 --> 00:33:58.440 there, and of course we paid them, but still they did help us, 449 00:33:58.519 --> 00:34:00.200 and you know, the fun we had to do that even, you 450 00:34:00.200 --> 00:34:05.839 know, it's like I remember all of that and that's the beauty of life 451 00:34:06.279 --> 00:34:12.880 in recovery. Oh my gosh, it's it's incredible looking back, and it 452 00:34:12.920 --> 00:34:20.960 is filled with gratitude for sure, and it's one of those things where it 453 00:34:21.039 --> 00:34:23.559 was just baby steps in life, right, I mean we knew moving in 454 00:34:23.639 --> 00:34:27.519 there, like, oh my gosh, you're right, we were totally excited. 455 00:34:27.559 --> 00:34:30.440 We were like ecstatic that we got we actually have a roof over our 456 00:34:30.480 --> 00:34:35.719 heads and it's our own place, Like that's huge. Did we know that 457 00:34:35.719 --> 00:34:37.920 that was going to be here? Did we knew that was not going to 458 00:34:37.000 --> 00:34:40.519 be here forever home? I mean we hoped so, but at that point 459 00:34:40.599 --> 00:34:45.440 where like this works for us until something else makes sense, And we didn't 460 00:34:45.440 --> 00:34:49.480 even know at that point, Like I had no intentions on I mean I 461 00:34:49.679 --> 00:34:52.239 not no intentions, but I didn't know when I was going to go back 462 00:34:52.280 --> 00:34:57.360 to school or we didn't know, you know, two seventeen was gonna make 463 00:34:57.400 --> 00:35:01.199 it. And you know, so there's there was all these things that we 464 00:35:01.280 --> 00:35:07.639 just never gave up on, and the apartment was, you know, our 465 00:35:07.679 --> 00:35:14.639 sanctuary to be able to have all those things come true. You know. 466 00:35:15.880 --> 00:35:21.719 We got a little kiddie cats that you know are amazing, are little fur 467 00:35:21.840 --> 00:35:24.480 babies. Oh, we have to tell the story though, which which one. 468 00:35:24.920 --> 00:35:34.239 So we moved in on a Wednesday, and I don't know it was 469 00:35:34.280 --> 00:35:38.960 the Thursday Wednesday, Yes, Wednesday, and we had great movers two minute 470 00:35:39.000 --> 00:35:43.119 the truck here in Traverse City. Is your plug for them? Yeah? 471 00:35:43.159 --> 00:35:45.199 No, they did a great job. They did an amazing job, guys, 472 00:35:45.239 --> 00:35:49.719 And yeah they were they were great. Without them, it would have 473 00:35:49.760 --> 00:35:55.199 been impossible. But we got them here, and we came over early in 474 00:35:55.199 --> 00:35:59.199 the morning because we were supposed to they were supposed to be at their apartment 475 00:35:59.199 --> 00:36:01.239 at eleven thirty, okay, to take all of our stuff and to start 476 00:36:01.320 --> 00:36:07.159 moving it. And we decided we would bring the kiddy cats over here first. 477 00:36:07.400 --> 00:36:12.840 So we grabbed the cats and we'd come on over and they're just kind 478 00:36:12.840 --> 00:36:15.239 of like, whoa, what's going on? Freak out mode A little bit, 479 00:36:15.480 --> 00:36:17.320 No, a lot of it. It was a lot of it. 480 00:36:17.880 --> 00:36:21.960 And I was trying to get the internet to work because you still had work 481 00:36:22.000 --> 00:36:24.400 stuff to do, and I couldn't get it going. Apparently Jesus didn't want 482 00:36:24.480 --> 00:36:28.719 to work because seriously, all I'd have to do is plug it in and 483 00:36:28.800 --> 00:36:32.960 it works. Which it worked again like five minutes after you needed to work. 484 00:36:35.199 --> 00:36:37.039 But by that time it was like five minutes. It was fun a 485 00:36:37.079 --> 00:36:40.280 long time after he was getting supposed to get to work, No, because 486 00:36:40.320 --> 00:36:45.599 I was already gone, or we left and it was working. But anyway, 487 00:36:46.000 --> 00:36:47.559 it was. It all worked out. I was supposed to because you 488 00:36:47.559 --> 00:36:52.079 got to, you know, take the day off anyway. But anyway, 489 00:36:52.119 --> 00:36:53.960 so the cats, we leave them here, you know, we think, 490 00:36:54.000 --> 00:36:58.280 hey, it's an empty home, and I mean there's a few boxes here. 491 00:36:58.320 --> 00:37:00.599 But we figured out how much trouble well could they really get into and 492 00:37:00.679 --> 00:37:06.000 we had a new couch sitting there ready for them to scratch up all the 493 00:37:06.039 --> 00:37:10.119 hell. And so we come back three hours later with the movers and all 494 00:37:10.159 --> 00:37:16.920 of our stuff. We come in and Nico is behind the couch on the 495 00:37:16.920 --> 00:37:25.480 main floor and Luna, who is how is she almost one and a half 496 00:37:25.880 --> 00:37:32.079 two almost two years old Christmas, I think January, Yeah, nowhere to 497 00:37:32.119 --> 00:37:38.679 be found. And then the little man Hudson who is eight months almost nine 498 00:37:38.679 --> 00:37:47.079 months old, now nowhere to be found. And you started looking for him. 499 00:37:47.199 --> 00:37:51.440 This is in the movers weren't here yet. Yeah, there was like 500 00:37:51.559 --> 00:37:54.800 fifteen minutes where I'm like, it's just him and I, Corey and I 501 00:37:54.920 --> 00:38:00.599 home. I'm calling them, calling all their names. Just nowhere. And 502 00:38:00.719 --> 00:38:07.360 meanwhile, nothing in the house like so no no like boxes to hide in 503 00:38:07.519 --> 00:38:13.679 or behind or furniture to get in between. There's nothing here and I cannot, 504 00:38:13.719 --> 00:38:16.960 for the life of me find these two animals, full grown cats. 505 00:38:17.679 --> 00:38:22.119 So imagine coming downstairs or coming in the main area, you know, in 506 00:38:22.159 --> 00:38:24.360 your house, You're like, okay, where where's the cat? You see 507 00:38:24.400 --> 00:38:30.400 Niko, Nico's probably twice Niko's like those two put together. Ye, so 508 00:38:30.800 --> 00:38:34.440 limited options for her. So she just says, Hey, here's the couch. 509 00:38:34.480 --> 00:38:37.480 I'm gonna go behind it. This is where you can go to hide. 510 00:38:37.400 --> 00:38:39.400 Yeah, And the couch doesn't even like against the wall, it's probably 511 00:38:39.519 --> 00:38:42.840 like two feet away from the wall, you know. And she's like, 512 00:38:42.920 --> 00:38:46.239 no, this is it. This is where I'm going and so imagine that, 513 00:38:46.320 --> 00:38:50.079 you know, okay, your big cat there, and then you go 514 00:38:50.119 --> 00:38:58.039 downstairs. There's nothing and there's nothing, no sign of cats anywhere. Then 515 00:38:58.079 --> 00:39:01.880 you go upstairs you're like, okay, checking the closet and which there's nothing. 516 00:39:02.280 --> 00:39:06.320 Well there's a washer dryer. Yeah, oh that's where they're at. 517 00:39:06.400 --> 00:39:08.920 The behind the sure that's where they're at. Go go check their honey. 518 00:39:08.960 --> 00:39:13.360 So then you go up there and you you said you check behind the house. 519 00:39:14.000 --> 00:39:16.159 I got a top of the washer and dryer. I got my I 520 00:39:16.320 --> 00:39:22.320 was like wedge back underneath with my cell phone, flash a light. I'm 521 00:39:22.360 --> 00:39:29.880 like battnet like the dryer ducked thing hose to like make sure, like I 522 00:39:29.880 --> 00:39:32.480 don't know. At this point, I was a mess. It was like 523 00:39:32.599 --> 00:39:37.679 really disturbing. No. I think Brad, I think that's his name. 524 00:39:38.039 --> 00:39:42.920 He was like the head mover in charge, and he's like, oh, 525 00:39:43.039 --> 00:39:45.599 cats they can get into little places and you'd be surprised. And then like 526 00:39:46.559 --> 00:39:54.360 under our sink, like in the kitchen there's cabinets bolt where that cabinet butts 527 00:39:54.400 --> 00:39:59.480 up against the other cabinet's like at a ninety degree angle. But on the 528 00:39:59.559 --> 00:40:07.800 floor there's like a I'd say four inches wide, buys for five inches high, 529 00:40:07.880 --> 00:40:12.159 maybe not even that high. And he's like, oh, I bet 530 00:40:12.159 --> 00:40:15.519 they're down in there. And so you looked in there and you're like putting 531 00:40:15.519 --> 00:40:22.280 your arm in there. I just don't know. I'm like, man, 532 00:40:22.320 --> 00:40:24.360 I don't know how they'd get in there. Where would they go? And 533 00:40:24.400 --> 00:40:29.880 then I thought for some reason, they got up in the duck worker on 534 00:40:29.920 --> 00:40:30.599 top of the duck to work, but you were like, no, no, 535 00:40:30.679 --> 00:40:32.440 those doors were closed, and I was like, where are they? 536 00:40:34.920 --> 00:40:37.360 I'm like, what about the couches. I'm thinking, like they ripped a 537 00:40:37.360 --> 00:40:40.039 hole in the bottom of the couch and like just one up in there and 538 00:40:40.159 --> 00:40:45.039 laid which they didn't. So I like looked at the couches up later and 539 00:40:45.039 --> 00:40:47.239 I'm like, man, like this doesn't make any sense, and I'm trying 540 00:40:47.280 --> 00:40:50.199 to put it together. And I thought this would be a fun game to 541 00:40:50.239 --> 00:40:52.320 play, which turned out not to be a very fun game to play. 542 00:40:53.079 --> 00:40:58.400 Cats they won, Yeah, they won that game. Yeah, And then 543 00:40:58.599 --> 00:41:05.199 you just like are just emotional, Oh my gosh. I'm I'm like they 544 00:41:05.320 --> 00:41:10.679 vanished, and I'm thinking all the bad things in the world. I'm like, 545 00:41:10.679 --> 00:41:15.599 like, who would somebody come here and let them out. And I 546 00:41:15.639 --> 00:41:19.679 had sent some nasty emails to this contractor, well, I sent one to 547 00:41:19.719 --> 00:41:27.800 him, and then the lady who this what do you call realtor realtor that 548 00:41:27.920 --> 00:41:30.360 was selling the house, like she was supposed to hire this guy and they're 549 00:41:30.360 --> 00:41:35.039 supposed to fix much stuff and it was crap and so like I had sent 550 00:41:35.119 --> 00:41:37.599 some emails that I wasn't very happy, and I'm like, did they come 551 00:41:37.599 --> 00:41:39.960 over and just have a key and just let our cats out? You know, 552 00:41:40.840 --> 00:41:44.360 like I don't know, like because it just didn't make sense. They 553 00:41:44.400 --> 00:41:49.199 were nowhere to be found. Yeah, And we had four movers that all 554 00:41:49.239 --> 00:41:52.360 knew that we were looking for these cats who were everywhere in every room, 555 00:41:52.400 --> 00:41:58.599 in every area, making noise, you know. So you're thinking, like 556 00:41:58.719 --> 00:42:01.000 they would disturb you know, we're where they were at, they would like 557 00:42:01.119 --> 00:42:05.800 rustle up where they were at, so they would come out from wherever that 558 00:42:05.960 --> 00:42:10.239 is. Nope. Four hours later from after the moving there, we still 559 00:42:10.320 --> 00:42:15.039 have your phone, your cat's yet Nope. And then after they left, 560 00:42:15.119 --> 00:42:21.719 I'm thinking they'll come out once all the unfamiliar voices are gone. I'm calling 561 00:42:21.760 --> 00:42:24.559 their name. You left to go do spectrum stuff, I'm looking everywhere again, 562 00:42:27.079 --> 00:42:32.199 and I looked for probably an hour and a half and now I'm looking 563 00:42:32.280 --> 00:42:37.400 amongst other things that had been brought into the home. Anyway, long story 564 00:42:37.480 --> 00:42:43.559 short, they finally we found them. They were because I was like, 565 00:42:44.639 --> 00:42:50.239 the only cause in our downstairs bathroom, underneath the sink, there's like, 566 00:42:50.280 --> 00:42:52.159 well, there's a scene, there's like a counter in there, but underneath 567 00:42:52.159 --> 00:43:00.519 it there's probably a three three four inch if three inch maybe maybe it's it's 568 00:43:00.519 --> 00:43:02.960 not very very hYP there's a little gap in the very bottom. And I 569 00:43:04.000 --> 00:43:07.679 remember seeing that earlier in the day, thinking there's no way they got underneath 570 00:43:07.760 --> 00:43:12.480 there and open up the cupboards and stuff and it's like no. But I 571 00:43:12.519 --> 00:43:19.360 remember thinking like there's no way, and I was like, come on, 572 00:43:19.440 --> 00:43:21.880 let's go find our kiddies. I was like, I think they're under there. 573 00:43:21.880 --> 00:43:23.840 And you're like, no, there's no space underneath there because there really 574 00:43:23.840 --> 00:43:27.079 it doesn't even look like it. And I was like, yeah, there 575 00:43:27.159 --> 00:43:29.039 is. I'm like, come on, let's let's go get our kiddies, 576 00:43:29.119 --> 00:43:31.119 you know, and you're like what And because for the life of me, 577 00:43:31.199 --> 00:43:36.480 that could that was the only place that they could have been that did we 578 00:43:36.519 --> 00:43:39.000 really look under their search and I was like no, And so you get 579 00:43:39.000 --> 00:43:43.760 down there and your hands and knees and you're looking and you got the flashlight 580 00:43:43.800 --> 00:43:45.639 going with the phone and you're like, no, there's not And I'm just 581 00:43:45.719 --> 00:43:49.719 like, man like to me, like that would have been the spot, 582 00:43:49.840 --> 00:43:52.159 Like where the f else would they be? As I'm thinking that, and 583 00:43:52.199 --> 00:43:55.079 you're like about to cry again, I look up, I'm like, well, 584 00:43:55.159 --> 00:44:00.519 there he is right there, little little man Hudson comes out from around 585 00:44:00.519 --> 00:44:04.800 the backside of the toilet. And then you're like what where, I'm like 586 00:44:04.920 --> 00:44:07.239 right there and you look up and you're like, oh, my babies. 587 00:44:07.280 --> 00:44:09.320 And it was just such a relief moment. And then Luna came out to 588 00:44:09.440 --> 00:44:13.719 it was like, oh hey, and I think that they finally I think 589 00:44:13.719 --> 00:44:17.280 that's that's where they were hiding, because you said you checked behind the toilet 590 00:44:15.480 --> 00:44:21.719 and yeah, I looked in the cabinet and everything. I didn't know there 591 00:44:21.760 --> 00:44:23.920 was a space underneath there. Yeah, but I think they got underneath there. 592 00:44:25.039 --> 00:44:28.920 And then we're just kind of chilling and then finally came out of there, 593 00:44:29.239 --> 00:44:32.360 but then went behind the toilet. Yeah. Yeah, it was it 594 00:44:32.480 --> 00:44:38.679 was quite the the the traumatic experience and thinking that you lost your cats and 595 00:44:38.719 --> 00:44:45.639 you were just like, oh it was. It really affected me because it 596 00:44:45.719 --> 00:44:52.719 was I'm like trying to be excited about this new experience, a new place, 597 00:44:52.840 --> 00:44:57.159 and I'm putting someway and I'm like a this place, a this kitchen, 598 00:44:58.159 --> 00:45:02.719 this every I'm just like can't really embrace anything because I'm just like this 599 00:45:02.880 --> 00:45:06.360 nothing feels right. I think I even told you that, I'm like, 600 00:45:06.400 --> 00:45:09.280 nothing feels right, Like this just feels like not good. Yeah, and 601 00:45:09.320 --> 00:45:13.000 you thought we were gonna just start smelling him one day he thought they have 602 00:45:13.039 --> 00:45:20.440 gotten the wall. Yeah, all kinds of cold case stuff going on. 603 00:45:20.639 --> 00:45:24.119 I was like, yeah, they're in the wall somewhere. I don't know 604 00:45:24.159 --> 00:45:28.440 how. I don't know what. It was the weirdest thing, like, 605 00:45:29.760 --> 00:45:32.840 yeah, it was weird. And I'm like trying to get like heat reading 606 00:45:34.119 --> 00:45:38.280 temperature like whatever apps, trying to get like the wea their heat signature. 607 00:45:38.480 --> 00:45:43.079 No, there's not one of those. There's something you can buy for your 608 00:45:43.119 --> 00:45:47.079 phone to put on there or something whatever. No, it didn't work. 609 00:45:47.519 --> 00:45:51.719 Yeah, maybe I probably could have done something with my cameras, but I 610 00:45:51.719 --> 00:45:57.800 don't know what time was it that we found them. I don't remember I 611 00:45:57.840 --> 00:46:00.800 think it was like nine o'clock at night. It was, it was late, 612 00:46:00.840 --> 00:46:04.880 it was dark, I mean it was nine ten at night. Yeah, 613 00:46:05.559 --> 00:46:07.679 so it was it was interesting. So don't ever think, hey, 614 00:46:07.960 --> 00:46:12.320 this will be fun. Let's play hide and seek with our cats. No, 615 00:46:13.239 --> 00:46:16.519 they will win every time, and it's not fun and it's very very 616 00:46:16.639 --> 00:46:22.880 traumatic for people. Yeah, we did find him and every everything turned out 617 00:46:23.400 --> 00:46:28.960 great, and like even the little things like the contractor half ass and his 618 00:46:29.119 --> 00:46:32.239 job and I don't know, like all that stuff is just so little and 619 00:46:32.320 --> 00:46:37.320 minute, and it did get me worked up in that day. I think 620 00:46:37.320 --> 00:46:40.400 that I still haven't read her email the realtor, because I shot her one, 621 00:46:40.719 --> 00:46:45.840 you know, I haven't even read it. Her little follow up of 622 00:46:46.280 --> 00:46:50.000 oh he stands by his work, I'm like, oh, if he doesn't 623 00:46:50.000 --> 00:46:52.719 come on over, that's just what you kind of told me. The gist 624 00:46:52.760 --> 00:46:55.639 of her email was. But like those little things, you can let those 625 00:46:55.639 --> 00:47:04.519 things eat you up and you can let them drive you. But why Yeah, 626 00:47:04.559 --> 00:47:07.199 Why, I got a beautiful wife, I got cats that are alive, 627 00:47:07.960 --> 00:47:14.000 I have a fantasy football draft coming up, you know, I got 628 00:47:14.000 --> 00:47:20.559 a workplace that's fun that I think we're doing really really good things, and 629 00:47:20.800 --> 00:47:22.800 we're just scratching the surface, you know, to to life. Yeah, 630 00:47:22.840 --> 00:47:29.519 employees that are invested and you know, balls, but I like them all. 631 00:47:30.079 --> 00:47:32.280 Yeah, you know, we all have our strengths and our weaknesses, 632 00:47:32.320 --> 00:47:37.920 and you know, like Adams blogs are freaking awesome and they probably can all 633 00:47:37.960 --> 00:47:43.760 close the black bags. Yeah, I think they can. So they got 634 00:47:43.800 --> 00:47:46.639 that going for him. Justin's really taken the role of like trying to be 635 00:47:46.679 --> 00:47:52.960 the transportation director. And you know, Mitch, she's like, I don't 636 00:47:52.000 --> 00:47:58.000 want to say a hostess. He's a great presence that's constant in terms of 637 00:47:58.039 --> 00:48:04.039 being there and being able to field and direct and yeah, we would be 638 00:48:04.119 --> 00:48:07.039 lost without him. Yeah. And Germany's come a long way and he's fun. 639 00:48:07.559 --> 00:48:09.920 Yeah, you know, and he wants to learn, he wants to 640 00:48:09.960 --> 00:48:14.920 do things. Yeah. So it's just, you know, I have all 641 00:48:14.920 --> 00:48:17.559 these great things going on, and you know, my family. I wish 642 00:48:17.599 --> 00:48:22.559 I could spend more time with them. I found the list of things that 643 00:48:22.599 --> 00:48:25.000 I wrote down that I wanted to do, and I can't remember if that 644 00:48:25.039 --> 00:48:29.119 was the real list, if that was a list I made up after I 645 00:48:29.159 --> 00:48:32.519 couldn't find the real list. I'm talking about the goals that I had when 646 00:48:32.519 --> 00:48:36.280 I was in treatment of like, I'm gonna write five things down that I 647 00:48:36.320 --> 00:48:37.360 want to accomplish, and then how I'm going to get there, because I 648 00:48:37.400 --> 00:48:39.519 don't know if I wrote down how I was going to get there, I 649 00:48:39.519 --> 00:48:43.800 don't remember. But anyway, I found that list on there was spend more 650 00:48:43.800 --> 00:48:50.079 time with family. With your family, so that counts, but you know 651 00:48:50.119 --> 00:48:52.159 my other family, like my dad's three hours away, my mom's three hours 652 00:48:52.199 --> 00:48:58.320 away. But since then, you've reconnected with your dad. Yeah, so 653 00:48:58.519 --> 00:49:02.159 like that's huge. I don't talk to him as much, you know, 654 00:49:04.760 --> 00:49:07.760 same thing with you know, mom and them. I don't, you know, 655 00:49:07.880 --> 00:49:13.000 talk to them all that much. My sister's been avoiding me for certain 656 00:49:13.000 --> 00:49:17.039 reasons, but you know, I've texted her. I've been texting her today. 657 00:49:17.920 --> 00:49:22.360 She's in our fantasy football league for the family that we're doing that. 658 00:49:22.480 --> 00:49:25.159 You know. The little my little nephew, he's not so little anymore. 659 00:49:25.159 --> 00:49:31.519 He's like eleven, I think, or twelve returning one of those. He 660 00:49:31.559 --> 00:49:35.000 wants to do fantasy football, and he wanted to last year because he saw 661 00:49:35.119 --> 00:49:37.920 like all of us talking about it when we were at Christmas. He's like, 662 00:49:37.960 --> 00:49:39.440 wait, I want to do fantasy football. So I tell him, 663 00:49:39.440 --> 00:49:42.039 I was like, all right, next year, buddy, else I'll start 664 00:49:42.039 --> 00:49:45.440 our league and you'll be in it. So yeah, we're doing that, 665 00:49:45.519 --> 00:49:49.239 you know. So that'll the fantasy football And that's what I love about it. 666 00:49:49.239 --> 00:49:54.000 It really brings people together. Like even Adam who works for US now 667 00:49:54.039 --> 00:49:59.199 and he's been the league ever since we started the Sober League, you know, 668 00:49:59.239 --> 00:50:01.199 back in twenty nine team, he hasn't always been sober, but it 669 00:50:01.239 --> 00:50:04.719 gives me a chance to hit them up, you know, to go, 670 00:50:04.800 --> 00:50:06.719 hey, what's going on, man, how you doing? You know, 671 00:50:06.800 --> 00:50:08.920 and it really kind of connects you. And like one of the guys, 672 00:50:09.039 --> 00:50:10.800 it's not going to be in the league this year, I think, because 673 00:50:10.800 --> 00:50:16.519 he's having a real tough time with a sobriety and it just kind of sucks 674 00:50:16.559 --> 00:50:20.840 because he was always a fun person in the league that I would, you 675 00:50:20.840 --> 00:50:23.400 know, trash talk to a lot and it was just fun. And I'm 676 00:50:23.400 --> 00:50:27.599 gonna miss that and I think he'll miss that too. But I remember being 677 00:50:27.639 --> 00:50:31.119 in those shoes that he's in right now, where you know, he just 678 00:50:31.159 --> 00:50:37.360 can't pull it together and he probably thinks he doesn't deserve anything fun. I 679 00:50:37.400 --> 00:50:40.440 wouldn't listen to the ticket in the morning, Like after a relapse, I 680 00:50:40.480 --> 00:50:44.480 wouldn't do anything that I wanted to do, anything that brought me joy. 681 00:50:44.559 --> 00:50:49.760 I would not do it because I feel like I didn't deserve it. So 682 00:50:49.800 --> 00:50:52.159 I get where he's at. But it's just gonna suck, you know, 683 00:50:52.239 --> 00:50:54.840 with him not in it this year. But you know, hopefully he can 684 00:50:55.760 --> 00:51:00.960 get things right with his life and you know, you know, it's how 685 00:51:00.000 --> 00:51:04.280 to get a hold of me if you need something. But yeah, he 686 00:51:04.400 --> 00:51:07.239 was invited to the league. He just yeah, I couldn't do it, 687 00:51:07.280 --> 00:51:14.639 but yeah, so I have great things to look forward to. So it's 688 00:51:14.719 --> 00:51:17.199 hard, though, because getting mad and getting frustrated is so easy, and 689 00:51:17.239 --> 00:51:22.320 sometimes you think it's fun and you just want to just raw. But you 690 00:51:22.360 --> 00:51:24.239 saw me the other day and I was like, no, I'm not reading 691 00:51:24.239 --> 00:51:28.239 that email because it's not in the mood. I'm not going to do it. 692 00:51:28.679 --> 00:51:31.159 Yeah, and it's not because I didn't want to write something nasty back 693 00:51:31.199 --> 00:51:37.199 to her, because I did. But le sort accomplished, and where's my 694 00:51:37.280 --> 00:51:39.960 mental at, you know, like I just moved, we just thought we 695 00:51:40.079 --> 00:51:45.679 lost our cats, and yeah, yeah, so think about that kind of 696 00:51:45.719 --> 00:51:47.400 stuff and you don't even have to be in a recovery. You can just 697 00:51:47.440 --> 00:51:52.320 be whatever. You know. That's just a good way to look at life 698 00:51:52.320 --> 00:51:54.840 sometimes. Is it worth it? And how riled up do you want to 699 00:51:54.840 --> 00:51:59.519 get yourself? You know, let it go a few days and address it 700 00:51:59.519 --> 00:52:04.960 then if you really need to. But letting things go, I guess that 701 00:52:04.960 --> 00:52:08.400 would be the point of that. Yeah, I think I've done rambling now. 702 00:52:10.280 --> 00:52:14.719 It's been a long day. It's been a long, long couple days. 703 00:52:14.880 --> 00:52:17.559 So yeah, this is why I gotta do a podcast more often, 704 00:52:17.639 --> 00:52:21.039 so I don't ramble as much. There you go. I feel like I 705 00:52:21.119 --> 00:52:22.519 got so much to get in and I haven't heard my voice in so long. 706 00:52:22.559 --> 00:52:29.000 I have to just keep talking now. But thanks for listening. And 707 00:52:29.400 --> 00:52:31.280 yeah, if you want to go back and listen to some of the podcasts 708 00:52:31.320 --> 00:52:35.880 from back in the day, I'm sure they would be interesting for some people, 709 00:52:36.760 --> 00:52:39.239 you know, because it's like a not a soap opera, but it's 710 00:52:39.239 --> 00:52:43.000 like a journal. It's like a diary of us in our lives and the 711 00:52:43.000 --> 00:52:49.360 things we've been going through and you know, from back to school to you 712 00:52:49.400 --> 00:52:52.239 know, you being pregnant the first time and also even getting together and moving 713 00:52:52.280 --> 00:52:55.880 in and you know to listen to all that, and I bet that would 714 00:52:55.920 --> 00:53:01.199 be interesting. Yeah, get the app, it's in the app store. 715 00:53:01.280 --> 00:53:07.159 Two seventeen Recovery. Thank you searched two seventeen recovery podcasts, but there's links 716 00:53:07.199 --> 00:53:12.199 to at two seventeen recovery dot com. Yep, yeah, I seem the 717 00:53:12.280 --> 00:53:14.920 cat get the stuff. He s all right, I have a cat to 718 00:53:15.000 --> 00:53:17.559 yell at A right good evening? All right, thanks everybody having good night. 719 00:53:17.840 --> 00:53:22.679 Thanks for listening to the two seventeen Recovery podcast. We hope you come 720 00:53:22.719 --> 00:53:24.280 back for our next episode.