Hey, hey, I'm back with something for you to think about dating in
today's society or dating in today's world. We all know that things are not
as they seen. That didn't just start. Things are not as they seen.
Has always been a thing because people present to you one way when they're
actually another. So dating today it's different then back years ago, it's different.
It is so different. People are different because now any and everything goes.
Everything that's good they make it bad. Everything bad, they make it
good. So people are doing any and everything. You honestly don't know what
you're gonna get. You just don't know because people are so fake and full
of contense. You really don't know what you're gonna get. You have individuals
look one way when they are another, So you have to be careful.
You have to be able to ask tough questions, some questions that some people
won't like you asking. You gotta ask tough questions if you want to get
the truth. You have to ask the tough questions because nowadays, like I
said, it is not what it seems. People are not who they pretend
to be. So you don't ask questions, you find yourself in situations that
you really didn't have to be in had you ask questions or looked into things.
I hate to say it, but you just can't take people word for
things because they lie. They will lie boldly, right in your face,
looking so serious, but lying the whole time. So you have to be
able to communicate. You have to be able to ask questions, and you
must be able to google. Go. Yeah, I mean seriously, seriously,
you have to because things that you need to know, a lot of
times they're gonna keep from you. They're gonna sugarcoat it, or they're not
gonna tell you at all. Soul, Hey, you have to You have
to ask questions, and you have to be able to do a little footwork
on your own, little research. And I know that may sound tacky to
some people. Oh well if it does, but I'm telling you the truth.
I'm telling you the truth. I know people who are with individuals,
have they google, they would have found out they've been to prison and all
kinds of stuff, but no, they just loved that person so much.
Then you come to find out they've been to prison on hard drugs, but
they just refused to want to accept the truth, so they try to avoid
it. You can do whatever you want, But the truth is still the
truth. You can't change what once was or what has happened. You can't.
And then you know nowadays on the internet, once it's on there,
it's on there for anyone to go look at anyone. A lot of people
are out there wanting to be in relationships. But I will tell you as
I always tell you, start a relationship off by getting to know yourself.
That's the first relationship outside of God. That's the first relationships you should be
in with yourself, getting to know you, loving you. If people would
do that, If people will make the first relationship a relationship with self,
I guarantee you many lives will be different. Many lives will be different because
a lot of people get into relationships carrying their baggage. That's one thing.
You carry that baggage into your relationship. We can have it projecting your pain.
So that's no good for a relationship, is no good for the individual.
Then you have people who get into relationships but they don't love self.
If you can't love yourself, how do you think you're gonna be able to
love someone else when you having dealt with your own issues. When you don't
love yourself, you are so in that mental state where you open yourself up
to all types of shenanigans from other people. You open yourself up to things
that you will normally do. You wouldn't normally be involved with people, you
will normally hang out with all types of stuff. You open yourself up to
these things because you have these unresolved in you, and it gives you that
mindset that's not conducive to healthy living. Because so many people are blind by
their feelings, their wants, their desires, their emotions. They're blind to
reality. So they see everything that they want, but they don't see the
truth. They don't see the red flowers, they don't see the signs,
or they may see them, but they ignore them because of what they want.
So dating in today's world, you must be careful. You must be
careful because I'm telling you people look one way, but they are another.
They are another. They know it and they're hoping you don't find out.
Because a lot of people they're just not honest. They won't tell you the
truth. You have some that that is you know they're gay, they're bisexual,
which is still gay. Um, they're heterosexual, but they're cheaters.
You just have to be inquisitive. You have to ask questions. You have
to get to know that individual before you go falling in love on what you
think is love. You need to get to know that person first, get
to know who you're dealing with. But as I said, a lot of
people don't do that because they don't even know self. And that sounds kinds
of outlandish, but that is the case. Most times. People don't know
self, but they spend time and energy trying to get to know they're significant
others when they can't even figure out self. And all it does is lead
people into bad situations with individuals that they shouldn't be with. There are a
lot of miserable people in this world. Unfortunate, but it's true, a
lot of miserable people who don't care nothing about anyone else nothing. They care
nothing about anyone else. They think that other people are supposed to just take
what they dish out. They're not courteous, they don't care about no one
but self, and all it does is causes problem for people that's around them.
And it causes problem for those individuals because everyone is not taking your crap.
Some people go along for whatever reason, but everyone is not gonna go
along with it. So it's important to get to know who you're with.
A lot of people didn't find out they were with monsters until it was too
late. Abusers, pedophiles, cheaters, liars, things, all types of
things that people would have known had they asked questions, had they gotten to
know who they were with. And these days and times, oh my goodness,
get to know who you're with, because, like I said, a
lot of people look one way, but they are another. You think you
got this person, you think it's a male, and then come to find
out they were born female, and vice versa. It's a lot of that
going on, you know. And it's okay with some people, and that's
fine if that's what you've liked, but it's not fair to someone who is
really sincere about being in a relationship with who they're with. It's not fair
that the other individual is lying and they're keeping very important information. That's not
fair. That's not how you start a relationship. It's totally unfair. It's
not right. It's wrong to lie to people when you know you're lying.
So I would tell anyone get to know who you're wearing by all means necessary.
Get to know them. So many people just want to feel. They
just want to feel. They want affection, they want attention, they want
all of these things, and when they get a little bit of it,
lose their minds, They lose focus, They lose their minds because, oh,
he or she they're giving me the attention that I've been yearning for it.
They're showing me attention, they're giving me time. People lose their minds,
you lose it, you lose focus. Then you find yourself caught up
with people that you shouldn't have ever been with. You find yourself caught up
in situations you never should have been in. People do this to themselves all
of the time, because you know the old saying, the cart before the
horse. It should be the horse and the cart, but a lot of
people is the cart before the horse. So people fall head over heels and
what they think, quote unquote think it's love. They fall head over heels
only to find themselves and sometimes dangerous situations, definitely unhealthy situations, toxic all
because they couldnt see past their feelings. There wants, they're desires. When
you when you feel that the person you're with, you absolutely gotta have him
or her, You love him or her, Do you really you have to
look at it, do you really or is it just your emotions and your
feelings speaking your lust of the flesh, Because I'm telling you people do it
all of the time. They cannot seep as what they want. Everything else
is out of the window. What they want, what they desire, how
they feel. All of that trump's reality. It trumps the truth until people's
eyes begin to open and they realize they are in terrible situations with terrible people.
So it is something dating In today's world, you have people meeting online,
being lied to, meeting online, being used, taking for granted.
But people can't do that to you unless you willfully open yourself up to it.
People can't do you any kind of way unless you open yourself up to
it. You have people being catfished every single day, giving out hundreds and
thousands, in some even millions of dollars, and they've never seen that person,
never seen that person one time, but they're caught up emotionally emotional feelings.
People can be justice over the top, not ever meeting anyone in the
physical, only emotionally, then meeting someone in the physical, because it all
boils down to emotions and feelings and things of that nature. That's the catalyst
that drives why people want to be with each other. But still people go
about it the wrong way. So you get caught up emotionally and you lose
your mind. You don't think about anything else, just being with that person.
But you're totally disregard the important things. Stuff that's right in your face
you ignore because you're caught up emotionally. This is what happens in a lot
of abusive relationship. Most of them people are in them. They got into
them the wrong way, ignoring the signs of the red flags. Get emotionally
involved because of those nuggets and niblets that I've talked about on my episodes.
Those nuggets and niblets are little things that people do for you. Your significant
other does little things, They do, little things they say to keep you
where you are, to keep you with them. So they give you just
enough here and there to make you feel good. But it's all about self
gratification for them. But people miss all of this because of their own desires
and their own emotions and feelings and things of that nature. If you are
dating in today's world and you're not asking questions, you're not having a tough
conversation you're not able to, you know, ask what you feel is necessary.
That's a problem and you will undoubtedly suffer the consequences if you do not
do your part. And getting to know who you're with, who you're getting
with, it's important. It's important, and I know I harbored on that
part a lot because sometimes it's the biggest factor because people get so caught up
in their emotions and things they miss everything. But I do want to say
that to getting to know your significant other or however you characterize him or her,
getting to know them is of utmost importance. It really is. And
it's not because of thinking that people are liars, they're manipulative, their deceit
could and all of that, because everyone is not that way. But it
does not matter. And people have told me so many times old I really
fell in love because they were so nice, But then they realized that nice
wasn't enough. So you have to get to know beyond the niceness, beyond
whatever they do for you. You got to get to know them as a
person, as an individual, because everything else it won't matter them being nice,
them buying you gives them doing this and doing that none of us gonna
matter. If they're not treating you right, you're not gonna care about any
of that. You're not, So it's important to get to know who you're
will are they who they pretend to be, because most people certainly are not.
Only those who have dealt with their own inner issues and love themselves are
able to present who they really are. People don't even understand it. I've
heard people say, there's no way you know a person could be this way.
There's no way a person could be that way because they can't be.
They don't think anyone else can be. But if you love yourself, you
want to be the best you that you can be, a lot of people
won't understand you. But that's okay. They don't have to as long as
you know when you love yourself, you're not giving no one or nothing power
over you. But when you're dealing with individuals who have a like mindset,
then a lot of times they are individuals who have their own unresolved issues that
causes them to be controlling, very dominant, obsessive, possessive, abusive,
all of those things can't do anything. Codependent or too independent beyond believer.
Because some people are. You never know who you're gonna be with as a
person unless you get to know them. Now. People will shuck and job
you, they will fake and pretend, but they will always reveal who they
really are at some point or another, always, without fail always, But
you must do your part in getting to know them, seeing past your feelings,
your wants, your desire, your heart, seeing past all of that
to who they really are, being able to see the signs in the red
flags because they are always there. I know that I can talk about this
all day and all night. People still gonna do what they want to do,
and you have that right. You have the right. But when you
find yourself in the situation, you'll remember think on it by charity. You
will remember it. Because we all are responsible and accountable for what we open
ourselves up too. We're all responsible and accountable for what we allow in our
lives, all of us individually. I've told you many times you you teach
any person in your life, it does not matter who it is. You
teach him or her exactly how they can treat you, even when you do
nothing. You teaching them how they can treat you. Because nothing says a
lot doing nothing saying nothing A lot of times says a lot. And I
promise you, I promise you, if you let them get away, you
will see exactly what I mean, because they're coming back with some more crap.
If you let them get away the first time, they are coming back
with some more crap. Believe that, so be vigilant, be willing to
ask the hard questions. If you see that you're not able to communicate with
who you're with, you with the wrong person. See beyond your wants,
your desires, you're feelings, your heart. See beyond all of that,
because when it's all said and done, nothing is going to keep you together
other than being in love with one another. People can stay together for many
reasons. They can have many reasons, many excuses, and people do.
But a lot of people people realize they're unhappy, they're not happy together,
they don't even like each other. They're living separate lives. Because people would
rather stay in a relationship miserable than be alone. I think it's the saddest
thing, but it's the truth. That's why a lot of people don't want
to start over. They don't want to have to deal with the dating game.
They don't want to start over. It's up to you what you do.
As always, I just was thinking about it and then thought I would
put it out there. Listen, I want you to really think about it.
If you're dating, think about what you're doing. See past your flesh,
see past your heart. Because of your heart and mind are not positive
and on the same accord in sync, it's gonna lead you astrangth. You're
gonna find yourself in bad situations, oftentimes with bad people. So I want
you to really focus on what I've said, Let it get inside and marinate
a little. While it's your life. You do what you want to do.
I'm just giving you the information because we are living in some wicked times
with some wicked people, and dating is tough because so many people. There
are a million different names for relationships now, so many things going on.
People like this type of person, they want you, the person over there.
Oh, it's just a mess going on, you hear me. So
it's so very super important that you get to know who you're dealing with while
trying to date. In today's world. You gotta keep your eyes open for
real, for real. And that's all I'm gonna say. Leaving it right
there. Thank you so much for listening. Much love to you. You
and you please share this episode and it's always I end every episode the same,
and I hope you do it by on it.