About tapes. Oh, hello, Tricia, how are you hello? Tony
from Hack the movies? Super famous? How are you? Yes, super
famous Tricia's Italy. I'm doing pretty well. I just got back from the
woods. You did. What were you doing in the woods looking for porn?
Oh? Of course, like normal. Yeah, that's you know.
When I was a teenager, that's where you could get porn if it was
just in the woods, just in the woods like videos, VHS, tapes,
no magazines. I don't know why, but this apparently was like a
thing for many years, like decades. People would purchase a magazine and then
for whatever reason, it would end up in the woods, and teens like
me would find these magazines treehouses and stuff like you would climb up the treehouse.
I didn't have a treehouse anyway, some experience. I'm just saying,
you know, I haven't been able to find any since I was like eleven,
So it's been a rough. It's been a rough. Had twenty years
there your adulthood. Yeah, I don't know how else to find port,
so I'm not gonna buy it. So I continue to look in the woods,
and I will not find I am not able to find anybody did find
this camera? You did? Yeah? Is there porn on there? You
know? I don't know. But what is on here is uh a video
of our friends Riley and Mint Salad. No way, how are you doing?
I don't know. I found their camera in the woods. I hope
they're Okay, let's watch a clip. Now, that's interesting. I'm telling
you. It's just a few minutes away. I mean, I'm serious.
We've been out here for forty five minutes and you clearly don't know where we're
going. Yes, we did. I'm pretending to viewing the directions I printed
off a BA quest. Yeah, just give me the map. Do you
have the map? I don't have it anymore. What do you mean you
don't have the map? There wasn't enough space in the backpack. You're the
stupid camera, but you don't have the map. Gabe's holding the camera.
Well they're off to a bad star. Doesn't look great. No, no,
but we'll check back on this video later. Speaking of being in the
woods, Yeah, with cameras. The Blair Witch Project, great movie.
Yeah, you really wanted to do this one. Yeah. I was obsessed
with this movie. And then yeah, I think I was obsessed with the
marketing of this movie. Yeah, this is I'm sure other movies did at
first, but like my recollection, this is the first like big like viral
marketing push. I can remember like this was huge. It was it was
like everyone, well adults probably were like, how this is bullshit, but
people like us, we thought it was real. How old we were like
ten years old and nine or ten, so I thought it was real exactly.
My older cousin thought it was real or was lying to me, the
same one that helped me get that Leonardo Dicapro poster. Oh god, I
don't like her. Check the check the Titanic episode for that whole story.
Uh yeah. So the year came out, it was like huge. Yeah,
they were plugging it all the time. The trailer was awesome. I
remember watching like MTV because they always have the music videos and stuff, and
then they have the trailer come on and I would be like, oh my
god, there's a witch in the woods. That would be freaking me and
my cousin were watching it, and then it was like Blair witch dot com
or like we got to go to that website they did like a fake documentary
that came out at the time to even further the whole thing that it was
real, is that the one the documentary about like this, Yes, the
whole town. Yes, it was like the Curse of the Blair Witch or
something like that. Yeah, so there there was a lot of hype.
That's why everyone thought it was real too. And then it's like the actors
like no one, like everyone thought that it was real footage they died because
you never heard about the actors or the directors or anything. You just heard
about this trailer. Yeah, it was like in nineteen ninety four they went
in the woods. They were never saying and you having your notes here that
you have that you wrote yourself that they used are real names. To even
further it, and apparently the mom got like sympathy. Yeah, Like Heather
Donahue, the main actress, like her mom was really upset about this whole
thing because she would receive letters and phone calls from family members too and friends
like oh my god, where's Heather? Is she okay? Like anyway,
so it came out in nineteen ninety nine. All the trailers said that they
were missing in nineteen ninety four, right, So I mean like if you're
a family member, it's like, oh, Wow, I haven't checked in
on my my niece Heather five years. She died in nineteen ninety four.
Mom's like, no, no, you just saw it Christmas. Also,
what a weird way to announce your daughter's death. This Hollywood movie coming exactly
like I'm just gonna make some money. But it wasn't a Hollywood movie.
Uh, this was made and we have different numbers here, and I will
explain those numbers. What do you think this movie was made for? I
like the one second like Gilly Sue got in the mic stand anyway, keep
going, Yeah, I heard that the movie was Actually the budget was sixty
thousand, yes, for the actual movie, but when you factor in marketing
once it became this like a list thing, it bumped up to between two
hundred and five hundred thousand, which that happens a lot like Paranormal Activity was
made for less. I think seventeen thousand maybe way, but the marketing once
it got picked up by a major studio marketing, the budget balloon. But
since the movie was so cheap, they could afford it. And yeah,
this movie made a shit. You know, it's a ton of money.
Like, well, I think I have it at the whole skip ahead.
I think Andy eight million, oh yeah mind yeaheah, two hundred and forty
eight million dollars. That was probably the most the biggest independent film or like
budget to profit, like the most successful film at that point for that I
think it was Ninja, Turtles, No, No, Titanic of Giant World
Are you living? And it's like I got a giant budget? Just kidding.
I just wanted to mention Titanic, Like, I know, Halloween was
on that list at one point because it was made for three hundred thousand I
think, but yeah, made millions of millions of dollars. This one,
Like what really scared me and my cousin is that she lived in Blair Shore,
Maryland. Oh jez. And even though the town is not called Blair
in it, it used to be called Blair But I was like, because
the movie takes place in Maryland and it does. Yeah, And I was
like, oh shit, is this about? And if you think I didn't
make a Blair Shore project video, you got another thing going? Yeah,
can you please post that I can't find it? Oh god, I would
have to like search hard for it. You have to find it. Also,
I wouldn't want to know. You have to. No, I don't
want to post that video on YouTube. No. My my cousin actually she
lived in New Hampshire for a while when we were kids, and she lived
in an old schoolhouse they remade into a house and I swear that place was
haunted. But that's another shah. Okay, we have a clip. We
have a clip on the clip channel called Everyonoman's Seen a Ghost. Go check
out that clip. Anyway, keep going. So anyway, this house is
in the middle of the woods and my cousin was celebrating her first Holy Communion.
So we went up there for the weekend and we were playing in the
middle of the woods and I scared the shit out because I had just seen
the Blair Witch and I was scared because I thought it was real. So
I was talking about everything that happens, and we were like, we have
to come out at night and look for the Blair Witch. And my cousin
literally shit herself like she and to this day she will not forgive me for
scaring her so bad like she was. She was like, I can't even
like look in my backyard anymore because of the Blair Witch. So yeah,
but if you thought it was real. Wouldn't you be like, we don't
live anywhere near that town. What would the Blair Witch be doing here?
No, because I thought it was every woods in the in the world,
Like, you go out in the woods, you're gonna die from that.
We like the Jersey Devil's gonna get you. And I'm like, I don't
live in Jersey. Don't give a ship. I guess I was kind of
don't go in the river the lock of Sponsor, like for real, though,
any kind of monster, it could be very similar. It could be
a different witch exactly which I've met. Witches. Yeah, I mean they're
not really scary. Most they seem like women have gone through bad breakups.
But anyway, Yeah, this was directed by Eduardo Sanchez and Daniel Myrick and
they mostly do indie stuff and TV shows now, so they've gone on to
have a career. I looked up the actors. I think Josh still acts
in a lot of stuff. I think the mic God by the way,
I met these actors, you've met them at monster Mania and I asked them
if they wanted to do a video, and I forget which one. They
were like no, like just flat out no, and I'm like, all
right, like I don't really care about Yeah, so they're still doing stuff
and Heather downy, what does she do with these things? I don't really
know. She grows or something. Yeah, so I was looking up the
actors yesterday. I sent you the pictures. She wrote a book in twenty
twelve about how she's growing heat and the cover is her just naked surrounded by
marijuana and it's like My Life After the Player, which project like, wow,
it really went down a weird beats bo. But it makes sense though,
because in the movie she's like a total yeah, which I don't agree
with. You don't agree with that. No, I was like, that's
that's bad, bad, totally bad role model. I think I have that
in my notes. Anyway, this is a family show. Yeah, oh
my god, sorry guys. Yeah, I know I did a whole I
know I did a whole thing about porn in the woods, but I was
looking for porn to get it out of the woods so kids can't. I
wasn't doing any saving the day. What a hero. People called me out
recently. Yeah, I was posted about some video game I was playing,
and they were like, Tony, don't you say video games are for kids,
and I'm like, well, yeah, I'm playing the game to make
sure it's safe for kids, because normally I wouldn't play a you deserve an
award or something I will do. Thank you. You've got to be more
episodes. Every other girl in the shows mean to me. I'm the nicest.
See I tell it how it is. We recently had a Kira back
on the show. Yeah, and someone in the comments is like, can
you have her back on? It's great to have a girl that doesn't roll
her eyes after everything, Tony, She's wonderful. So yeah, let's get
into this movie, this wonderful movie that we thought was real, this documentary.
The production company is Hackson Films. Get it no, okay? So
Hackson is a very old, silent, black and white film about witchcraft and
devils. It's public domain. You can look it up. I think it
might even have got a Blu ray release. It's cool. It's goat.
It's cool to like a movie to put on the background because there's all weird
devil stuff and like real early special effects of witches flying around the city.
Huh, like legit like from nineteen ten or something. That's interesting. I
got that out yeah, so I thought that, like, all right,
I get what you're doing there. So I thought you were like hinting to
like hack the movies hacks, and I don't know what I was thinking,
Oh wow, you're I was like really deep into it. I don't know.
Now that would have been funnier if I made it. Yeah, well
you beat me again anyway. So the friends are getting together. One has
a video camera, the other one has a film camera. Film the film
cameras and black and lighte video cameras and color and it looks like shit,
let me see here. It's Heather and Josh right, and they're very excited.
And this reminded me of myself and cop. This is a movie I've
grown to appreciate. I'll talk about my initial reaction at the end. But
yeah, I did a documentary about my friend running across Pennsylvania, and like
ours kind of opened, like our documentary opens with us all like getting ready
for Like the documentaries, this rang pretty true to me. Yeah, so
they're going to pick up Mike. Yes, who's a sound guy who I
guess they put like a thing in the paper to pick up a sound guy.
Oh is that what they did? Okay, so they didn't actually know
Mike before that, no, because they said like, oh, it's nice
to meet you. What. Yeah, so he's just yeah yeah, because
you see he's got like the sound recorder and the microphones. Yeah. So
they're picking up Mike and uh they go to Burkettsville, Yes, which used
to be called Blair. They changed the name. I wonder why. It's
like Friday thirteenth, part five really when they were like, man, no
one wants to come to Crystal Lake, probably because Jason kills every oh no,
part six, part six, and they were like, you know what,
let's call it Forest Green. Oh, it's so much nicer. And
then at some point they changed it back to Crystal Lake because they were like,
yeah, fuck it for Crystal Lake. Everyone knows who he's coming back
anyway, he never dies, so yeah, they changed it to Burkettsville.
Uh. And Heather does her best like TV presenter, much like a small
quiet town anywhere no more than twenty families laid there here over two hundred years
ago. She is good, you know what, there's like an amazing actress
or not actress, like real person, just the way that she presents herself
on cameras I liked it. I liked I've seen I remember college people doing
videos like that. Right. It's important to note that the film camera is
rented. That's like, that's like a plot rented. But her talking about
the history of the town reminds me I got that alien autopsy tape there factor
fiction. Uh, And Jonathan Frakes is in there, and he does kind
of like the same inner, same intro. It's like, hell, could
you believe is a true? Right? Like boiler alien autopsy? Uh?
Fiction, It's the figkest thing you'll like anything real. I don't know,
nothing is real. Yeah. So they're going around town and asking townspeople about
the Blair Witch, and we get we get multiple stories. Some of them
reference a lady and then the other one references a guy who he came into
town one day and he's like, I'm finished, and they go to his
house and they found out he murdered children, but he made one face the
corner so he could kill the other one, right, and he didn't want
their eyes on him. It was like a bunch of different stories going on
here. But then there's also a mockumentary that I saw on YouTube that's called
the Birkettsville Seven so, which talks about how in like seventeen eighty five,
all of these weird things started happening, and then every year for forty every
forty to fifty years, something weird starts happening in the town again, like
yeah, exactly right. And then apparently, like in the nineteen forties,
according to this mockumentary, this guy named Rustin Parr killed the seven children in
Birkettsville, and then he said that an old lady told him to do it,
like she was in his house. Oh okay, which is kind of
I guess where that whole legend of the Blair Witch comes from. Gotcha.
There's like a weird witch that's going into people's heads and telling them to kill
children. Yeah. I like the mom with the baby, she's trying to
tell the story, and like the baby clearly like doesn't realize it's like a
movie, and she's like, sob yeah, tell a scary story anyway,
Like your kid doesn't want you to tell this story. Shut the fuck up.
Oh god, my goddaughter. Years ago, I had to feel I
had to make a fake pizza commercial for this movie. It was like a
commercial. I was supposed to play in the background Tony making pizza. That's
so cliche. It's actually my dad. It was actually my dad and my
dad and they were the twin brothers from the Mummy Cop series. It was
like a little joint shared universe. And my god daughter played young Lisa Cannoli
in it because the movie took place in like the nineties, which was the
bad guy a Mummy Cop. Please Watchummy. That's great. But all she
had to do was smile and say this pizza is the best, and she
just showed up crying. Oh no. We still make fun of her to
this day about it because like she she eventually worked up, like she's crying
and she spoils and goes, this pizza is the best. My god,
wonderful I have somewhere. So yeah, I know what it's like to work
with a kid who's just not getting it. I'm gonna give them treats or
something like some here. You can have some pizza, dog, some cookies.
You'll be fine. I don't know how to act with kids. Sometimes
I see kids, I'm just like what do I do? Like I'm petting
their head, like is that what you do? Good girl? And I
don't know what I supposed to do here. Like kids really love me,
but I'm like bad with kids. Yeah, I feel like I met my
cousin's kid for the first time the other day. Yeah, and like it
was in my way. She was in my way. It was in my
way. Yeah, okay, I don't want to do them. So I'm
like all my way to the bathroom. She's like in my way, and
I'm like, excuse me. And then she like went like this for me
to pick her up. And I was like, that's the opposite of excuse
me. You're supposed to move. Then I just went She didn't understand.
She's like, what happened? Just watching you walk by? Like what?
Oh? God? And speaking of kids, shout out to our good friend
Anthony. He occasionally watched the show Hi Anthony, and it's Daughterableill go in
the room. She's like, that's Tony, that's your friend. And she
walks in the room. Now she's gonna be real free down, just talk
to me. Anyway. They eventually meet a lady named Mary who apparently met
the Blair Witch. And I love this story. She's like, yeah,
she opened up her dress and she was hairy and and she was clearly feminine,
and she did this and this and this, and then afterwards they're like,
that woman's a liar. She said she was a ballerina. She said
she was a science like a million different things. She was like, she
was nuts. She's definitely on something. She was smoking that weed that uh.
But I think she does give them some information that comes up later,
right, But she does she talk about the rocks or something. Oh yeah,
the formations of the what was it, I don't know. Yeah.
Oh so yeah, they're they're excited about their first day of filming and they're
drinking, and of course they're having a good time. Terrible. It was
the nineties. It's normal. In the nineties, it was like still edgy.
Now it's like it's like, yeah, cool, dude, cool,
great cool. So the next day they talked to some fishermen who just want
to be left alone. Really. Yeah, they're not having it. They're
like, yeah, it's the Blair Witch. Yeah, it's something about her.
I guess some lady got lost. The story is weird. It's like,
yeah, lady got lost in the woods and then she showed up and
said she saw a woman, And I'm like that that story sucking, Like,
why are you even talking right now? But he went into the woods
and he just saw a you know woman, He probably saw the dancing devil
from the from the Return of the Excesses. Can you imagine you put her
dead? And I can't cut to that clip because that movie was so go
back and watch our Return of the Exorsies slash the Other Exorcist three, where
like we could barely show clips for the movie because there was so much.
Dude, that's before we decided, you know what those types of movies are
Patriot anyway, And another fisherman said he saw something in the water, something
weird in the water. Maybe it was a flying fish or something. Yeah,
and uh, I think I wrote here and you already told your story,
but yes, I uh, this is definitely giving me flashbacks of just
sticking around in the woods. What she used to do in the woods.
I was a boy scout, you were, Yeah, what I didn't know
that. I didn't want anyone to know in grade school because it was embarrassing.
Now that I'm older, I'm like, why is that so embarrassing?
Everyone else was doing crazy ship? But yeah, I was a boy scout
for like years. It wasn't a very good one. I didn't get a
lot of badges. We would go on trips and it's like people are in
that we go on trips and they'd be like, all right, make sure
to get all your merit badges, and we're like, we're gonna like stuff
on fire and throw rocks exactly, chop down like trees and shit, we're
cool. Porn. You find porn in the woods, you can find it.
It's not in the woods anymore. What's going on? Maybe I did
my job so well finding all you would deserve all of the merit badgers just
for that. But now I'm out of business as the woods deep corner.
So now I gotta buy porn and throw it in the woods and then collect
it again. I'm like the firefighter who creates fires. I need to ensure
my job. Jesus. They find coffin rock and a long time ago they
found a bunch of men mutilated and tied together at this rock in like a
weird formation, and then they went back into town to get more people to
retrieve them. But then all the men were going on disappeared. I'm not
really sure what the witch was doing there. I don't know, so,
like I don't know, there's a lot of different things going on here.
I wonder if it really is a witch, if it's like supernatural, or
if it's like people in the town that are just really fucking bored in Maryland.
Let me tell you something about that. People in Maryland. Let me
tell you something I know from experience. They're either getting crabs not okay,
oh, crabs, Okay, you know from experience, No, no,
Jesus do no actual crustaceans. They're they're crabbing to sell crabs. They're not
getting well the crab might lead into my other thing. So they're getting crabs
because everyone eats crabs of Maryland. Spent a lot of time in Maryland,
like partly grew up there. Uh, they're bored and they have no internet.
I'm not counting DC. If we're counting DC, it's like they're ruining
the world. And then the last one is, uh, I was doing
a lot of heroin. But that's just my experience in Maryland. If your
experience of Maryland is different than mine, let me know us know what's going
on in Maryland. They still not have internet. My grandmother, like you
see all these these they mostly came from my grandfather because they just couldn't get
reception and they're like literal neck of the woods. Oh no, now they
can. Now Wi Fi has gotten good enough that I can actually like watch
something on Netflix there. But up until like four years ago, like you
could probably get cable or satellite, but like internet was a fucking nightmare there.
Like for years, going on the Internet there was awful, which is
why he would buy so many Oh gosh, that sounds like Italy up until
a few years ago really behind. Honestly, I remember like in two thousand
and I don't know what is it, like twelve or something like, we
still had to go to like internet cafes and stuff. That's like big in
Europe, right, yeah, the internet cafe. But now, I mean
it's normal before, like even you know, at some point you should I'm
going in a couple of weeks. You should come? Are you coming back?
I don't know? You you know, I am. It's always a
crapshoot. It's like, yeah, chrisn we had all these things planned.
You're like, I'm living in Italy. Now it's like, oh cool,
I'm going to Argentina. I'm just one of these random places. I got
to go to Argentina. Why your family there? A lot of Italian people
go there of Italian heritage. Yeah, they migrated after a certain world event.
Well yeah, and a lot of them have my last name, so
I'm a little Yeah. Argentina, like Pelusa is a real big name down
there. It means floppy hat. That's it. Probably some dialect. No,
there's literally a character called El Capitan Peluso who wears a floppy hat.
That's like, it's a big when I've mentioned this before. When Facebook like
first blew up, my entire family were getting like frame request from people from
Argentina because they thought we were related. Maybe you are again. After World
War two, a lot of people need it the flee and according to my
dad, according to my dad, the Peluso family was not on the winning
side of that war. Were done here anyway? Oh god, So yeah,
they're in the woods. Yeah, they far in a tent would get
more character development. They brought one tent for three of them. And well
she makes a joke like, oh, I've never They're like, oh,
it's really tight in here, and she's like, well, I've never spent
it with two men like I've never spent the night in a tent with two
men before, a little thirsty. She was a little thirsty. Well,
apparently Josh is her ex lover. That's like the whole backstory, which like
they don't really get into their like extended deleted scenes. Oh okay, I
did not watch the deleted scenes. Yeah, I saw a few of them,
and that was like in the beginning, they kind of mentioned that I
ordered the VHS tape which says it has extended scenes, but it did not
come in on time, which is why there's no tape on set. I
would love to watch, you know, my big four k TV. I
only watch VHS rips on it exactly. Mike has the most depressing, uh
hair I've ever seen. It's just hair, It's like blotchy and show what
was that? I don't know. I don't know why they have to show
that. But then he like makes it come in and he's like, oh,
well you should see my ass, Like, no, I don't want
to see your ass. I don't know what's going on here. I definitely
don't want to know what's going on down there. I don't know if they
sponsored this particular episode, but Manscape Dot com makes sense. See it's all
connected. Even if they didn't sponsor this episode, check them out. Yeah,
he could have used it. It didn't exist back then, which is
why he looks so harmful. Exactly. This part is the scariest part of
the movie, I guess. So they're like lost in the woods. Yeah,
they're like, we don't know where we are, we don't know where
we are. And Heather, the woman, she says, I know where
we are, and then they believe her, and I went home. Oh
Jesus, It's like, oh my god, Like I was like, oh,
those poor assholes, they're so lost. Oh my god, you don't
believe Heather. Heather. Women are not the ones that lie. It is
definitely men. No. Women are bad at directions and they don't like to
admit with the wrong right exactly. I literally I had a girlfriend honestly flip
out of me because she gave me wrong directions. Yeah, she's like,
I said, I said go left. I'm like, I'm like, you
should understand what she was trying to say. That was the thing. So
she's like, all right, you go up here and you like make a
right and then I left. I'm like, I did that there's nothing here,
and she's like, I said, make a right and then I left.
I'm like yeah, and then she dawn on her She got left and
right confused. Well, that's your fault for being not understanding and making fun
of her dyslexia the fun. But yeah, the whole day she was mad
at me. You should see the way you're driving, you know, like
you would tell from left and right which way was the right way to go?
Am I wrong? Yeah? Yeah? Literally, she was like when
we would drive, she would give directions and she would literally be like just
pointing because she didn't know left or right. But you don't have the same
problem. You under like it was such a problem that she couldn't even vocalize
it. She just gave up. At one point with my boyfriend's like driving
and I'm like looking at the GPS, I just like tap on the window,
which I swear to God. The other day he got mad at me,
He's like, why the fuck are you talking on them? Like,
just tell me right. I'm like, I can't think of the word.
But then i get like Italian and English mixed up too, So I'm just
like this ross, I know, you know, I worked shot this joke
earlier and people thought it was offensive, and then he just proved her that
was the scariest part of the movie, Like, yeah, you can show
me. See. I can't relate to being hunted by a witch. I
can relate to being given wrong directions by someone who says they're not like why
it's scary for you? Oh my god, oh god. Another actually got
like the trains mixed up and we ended up going to like the wrong part
of film. Oh no, yeah, that's not cool, though, I'm
just like, I done. That's your fault because why didn't you double check?
I didn't know where we were going. She had the thing that I
don't know. It was to look for a house that I ended up not
moving in obvious. So they find a pile of rocks laid out like a
burial ground. They say it's like a burial ground, but I don't know
if it is. Yeah, who knows? They know? I think they're
just guessing. Yeah, they're just thinking, like, we see all these
rocks laid out, what else could it be? What else could it be?
Yeah, that's right, we see here. One of the guys knocks
over a rock. She puts it back, but she knocks over a rock,
and then they hear noises in the woods and they're too scared to investigate.
Why would you knock over a rock if you think it's on a burial
ground? Did he do it on purpose or to like accidentally? Because they
like, why wouldn't you be more careful? Yeah, speaking of being careful,
we should uh check in on Oh yeah, let's see. Yeah,
I wonder what they're updated to see if they were careful to our cameraman instead.
And I can't find Riley. I'm just I just wanted to review some
movies. I'm very sorry, and I lost the map and I shouldn't have
lost the map. No, this is afraid I'm gonna die m and I
won't be able to review some movies. Well, it looks like things are
getting worse anyway. Speaking of getting worse, it's about to get worse for
our characters in this movie. Uh they get lost again. Yeah, and
Mike is starting to lose it, and Heather will not show them the mas.
She's like, no, it's fine. Yeah. Well, she also
like she has a compass and everything too, so she's thinking she's on the
right track. I'm sure she's very independent strong indent woman. She is not
a strong she's not a strong defend woman. Well, Mike is an asshole,
Mike. Yeah, Mike snaps a little early. Yeah, and I
understand. How long are they in the woods there, like a day?
Two days, and he's got like another job to go to. The guy
has to return the camera or else. They get like fine, it's a
whole thing. Yeah, that was probably in my college. They had to
increase the fines for cameras really and start punishing people because the rich students would
just check out the cameras and just never return them because they could have for
to pay the fives. So they're like all right, yeah, they're like
all right, we need to like if you do it, you're not allowed
to run again. There was like a whole thing they had to do.
Let me see here, Yeah, he kicks the map. The map is
gone. No no, no, that sound at this part. Yeah it
is no, no, no, no, we're not at that part.
Where are we? We we are now they are back in the tent at
night and they're hearing more noises. Jesus Christ, what the fuck is that?
Fuck? Oh god, I just skipped that whole thing. Yes,
yeah, and it's funny. They're like scared of the noises in the woods,
but like, well it could be deer. Yeah, well that's what
they say, And I'm just like, yeah, because like I live in
a wooded area now, and my grandparents lived in literally the woods. There's
always something happening. Yeah, So like the sound that they're that's scaring them
falling, Yeah, the sound that scared them, Like it literally just sounds
like branches falling. Yeah. And again where my family lived, it could
have just been so just firing guns into the air for fun, Maryland.
So yeah, like this is the one part and I think as a kid,
this is the part that's supposed to start to really scare you. And
as a kid, I'm just like I hear that all the time, right,
yeahs like normal yeah yeah. So but I think if you put yourself
into that situation too, like you're in the middle of the woods at night
and you're hearing all of these different noises, your imagination starts to go on,
oh no, that happened. As boy Scott, I would get scared
hef hear someone walking or something like. There was definitely noises in the woods
that scared me. It's just the noises they were hearing just sound common to
me. So dude, when I moved to where like my parents were like,
I never heard a fox before. Oh my god, there's so weird.
I couldn't. I couldn't appreciate that what does the fox say song?
Because you've never heard of fox? I thought I thought a woman was being
murdered. It's horrible. I like, go out. I'm like, what
the fuck. And then finally a friend like, oh, those are what
foxes make. I'm like, that's what this fucking sound. That's why they
made a whole song about it. Yeah, but the song is never what
they say. No, it's not. I literally it was like two thousand
and eight. I'm sitting in bed, I was home alone, and I
just hear I'm like, what is going on? Can you imagine being in
the middle of the woods and hearing a fucking fox, like, oh my
god, I would Apparently rabbits make really loud sounds when they're being like attack.
They apparently that's like the only time they ever make sounds. Let me
see here. Uh yeah. It turns out the next day rocks were being
piled around their camp. Yeah, freak me the fuck out that would be
kind of scared if they weren't there the day before, and then they wear
that be kind of scared exactly. So all this sounds makes sense. Yes,
yes, now the map is gone. We don't reveal what happened to
the map that comes up in a second, but yeah, they there star
to lose it. Josh was like the calm one until now, right,
and she does this whole thing where she's like, it's impossible to get lost
in America. Yeah, like do you know how many people go missing in
the woods every year? Yeah, like it is very You can get lost
in the fucking woods right here down the street, like yeah, or you
can get like injured and stuff exactly, something us that it's that famous asshole.
It's a lot of famous householes. They made a movie about him,
Into the Wild movie. Oh I don't know. Yeah, he's the guy
who went to live in the woods like off the grid, right, and
then he like forget what happened, and you didn't know how to prepare meat
the right way, So I just fucking died even I was in a bus
that was left there, and then no one could get him because at that
time of the year, it like floods and it's been up. I think
they eventually moved the bus because people were going out there to live like him,
and the park rangers were like, oh my god, stop it.
Right well, at this point, it's like Darwinism, right, like if
you want to like go and live in the fucking woods, just fucking do
it. Like yeah, no, no, where's where's there? Like I
guess somewhere else in the because like right now, like if we go to
any park, you walk in one direction, you're gonna find a way out.
But yeah, I wonder what part of the country like where the forest
is like huge. Yeah, I feel like now it'll be hard to get
lost in the woods, like cell phones and I don't know. Yeah,
I mean, like you said, unless you run out of food and you
can't walk anymore, people don't know that you're gone in the woods, right
Yeah, which is what happens. I'm gonna go live in the woods.
You look like you're ready for that. That's been like my thing lately,
like whenever I get like frustrated about something, I'm just like every other every
day, I'm like, fuck it, it's gonna go live. So you
should dedicate your life to you think she's seen anyone. We're both single,
me and the blair Witch. Do you know what the blair Witch looks like?
No, apparently she's hairy to that lady. Well, I can tell
you what she looks like. So McFarland Toys, the guys who made spawn,
they did what do you call it? They did the movie Maniac series
in the nineties at my place, you ever, I mean, I'm sorry,
not at my place, the corner of the store. That's definitely over
there and not a separate set in my basement. I have those like horror
movie figures. Those are called the Movie Maniac series. And McFarland toys they
were told to make a blair Witch toy. Problem. They don't know what
it looks like, so they made two of them. That's that's one of
them. It's a tree man with horns. That's horrible and like a big
he's got like a sigh and a bundle. Oh he's got the bundle of
sticks that comes up late. Let me say there was another one. I
think, okay, yeah, And then they have a more more feminine looking
one and it's it's a zombie and she has like the flate of boobs.
I hate it. That's horrible. Why are you got to ruin the whole
like imagination, Tony, because now you're showing it to me, I don't
want to see that. Now you have to imagine that that's what it looks
like exactly before it was like just like a spirit like I don't even know
what would say. Could you imagine being passed with that? It's the terror
of being in the woods alone. I can't imagine being like, hey,
toy maker, sculptor, you need to make two Blair witches, Like,
oh, two characters, Okay, can you give me pictures of what they
look like in the movie? And it's like, oh, your imagination,
okay, okay? Uh, the best McFarland Actually no, I'll tell that
story for Darkness Falls. Actually, oh, Darkness Falls. I love that
movie. There's a McFarland toy story with that, no way, Yeah,
Johannah really wants to do that one. We should probably do that together.
Speaking of toys, side Tangent there, Uh, Jurassic Park. You know
Newman from Seinfeld's in it really yeah? In the Jassic Park he's the fat
guy. Oh yeah, yeah, wait, I have a visual representation here.
He is right there. So in the nineties, the toy company that
had to make him, I forget if we mentioned it in the Drastic Park
review. They like they were like, make a toy off this character,
but the role had him been cast yet. So when you get the Dennis
Negerie toy from drast Park, it's like this muscular guy and this like combat
suit who's ready to capture dinosaurs. The movie comes out, it's like,
what the fuck anything, Like you're sitting on his couch al too long.
And that was toy talk. Yeah. For more toy talk, go to
peg Warmers podcast. Johannah was on peg Warmers recently. She brought in her
porks. Yeah, I feel like I know what that is, stupid fucking
birds from that dumb Star Wars movie, the New Star Wars movies. She
oh, right there, Oh yeah, I don't know. She's obsessed with
them. Really, they're cute, that's nice. And Tricia's last episode.
Everyone's Tricia's last episode Save me God right in the comments how much you guys
want me here? Yeah, So they assume that people will look for them,
but they seem kind of insufferable, so I don't think they would.
Yeah. No, exactly what people in four like if they told people they're
so you have to be gone for forty eight hours to make a missing person
thing and then they would have to like call the police it. Yeah,
I still think it's like we got other things. I feel like back in
the nineties, people were kind of more about their own business, Like they
didn't have social media and everything like that, so they weren't keeping like tabs
on everyone, or they'd wait longer, like, oh, they must have
like got they happened, or maybe they're like getting brunch or something on their
way. They went into the bill Woods to look for a demon monster.
They got brunch. Uh, I think they got a jacked brunch. Don't
don't google check. I don't want to. Everyone else should. I don't
think you can handle it. Everyone else should google check. I can handle
a lot. I'm going to go google this afterwards. Going on here,
So Mike is losing his mind, Yes, and he admits to throwing the
map. Yes, anything's it's hilarious. Fucking kicked the map. It was
bullshit. Anyway, We're lost because they are a lot. They keep like
just going in circles and circles, and I guess the Blair witch is doing
it, or they're just or Heather's just not's mixing up her lips of right,
you know why, It's because the guys are making her go crazy.
That's why she can't get her head right, because he's fucking asking. Yeah,
that's your theory. Apparently it's tied to a deleted scene. Tell me
about that. Yeah, there's a deleted scene about you know how Heather and
Josh are like ex lovers. Yeah, and so the theory is that Josh
and Mike are actually in this together and they want to bring Heather into the
woods to make her go crazy and then kill her. That's the theory.
That's it's a fan theory. Is interesting. That's like the killer's scream.
But like this is like that's kind of going way out of your way.
Like it's like like Mike and Josh are like acting out this whole thing to
like freak Heather the fuck out, but then in the end something actually does
happen. Heather seems like an idiot. I'm pretty sure he just leave her
her own devices. Heather's really smart and I love her and Heather Donaghue.
If you are watching this review, I just want to say that you are
amazing and you are a strong independent woman like I mentioned before, and do
not listen to Tony because he is not correct. Also, Heather, if
you got any of that uh week and if anyone would like to send sup
to our po box, here's the address. I haven't gone to the po
box recently. Oh you should do that, depending on like what week it
is. There's either nothing there or it's overflowing. They still they know who
I am. I've gotten to that point right from the movie. Yeah,
they're like hack the movies. Yeah, we got a whole box. That's
awesome. It's good to be famous. It's very very famous, very famous.
You should start a PO box Foratricia's Italy. You know what I should?
What weird stuff would you get? Oh? God, a lot of
feet stuff. I feel like I don't know, I get a lot of
weird requests. Do you want to put that out there? Guys, if
you ask for a feed picks, they're not getting memories. No, you're
you're not going to get them. No, what's the price. It's the
price. We'll talk about it later. Randon was on this Someone offered fifty
dollars worth of bitcoin to see deep cleve it not even topless, and she
turned it down. I'm like why, I don't know. She sends the
bitches. My dms are open. I'll do this shit like I need more
bitcoin? You assholes. Exactly wonderful. All you bruns get all the SIPs.
I get nothing. I get nothing. Don't you get a lot of
don't? Yes you do. I know I've seen your inbox. No.
I get yelled at by people for not liking the new ghosts. Everyone else
is getting offered bitcoin for cleavage picks. Think you assle anyway? Uh so,
yeah, you think they're gonna try and kill them killer? Well,
I don't know. It's just a fan theory that's not personally well. There
is a deleted scene where you said, Josh like tore up the map or
crumble Yes, okay, yes, exactly so Josh, Yeah, I skip
that. But Josh actually crumbles up the map. He admits to crumbling it
up and then giving it to Mike, and then Mike kicks it. That
is a deleted scenes. Josh, yes, so it makes Mike look like
an asshole. Yes. And then here we get the most iconic image,
well, second most iconic image. The blair Witch sticks, the blair Witch
logo, the logo yeah you gotta put a logo in? Oh god,
Honestly, like that scene gives me chills because if I think about being in
the woods and seeing that, I'm sorry, say that again? Is it
our friends Riley and Minsalad. I don't know. I don't know. I'll
check in a second, But anyway, what were you saying? If I
see the blair Witch logo, Like, I'm just walking around the woods in
the middle of nowhere, I don't know where the fuck I am, and
I see this logo hanging there, like, what would you do? Well?
If I lived in a universe where The blair Witch is a movie like
this universe, I'd be like, some assholes sold the blair Witch. I
guess. I guess that makes sense. If The blair Witch was not a
movie, right and I went in there, I'd be like, what's that?
Like some cold or something like some satanic ritual. It's just creepy enough
without going over It's not like I mean, text chainsaws creepy in a different
way, but it's not like there's like bones, no nice and stuff like,
it's just it's just sticks. So you're like, which is crazy,
how scary it is? It's just a bundle of sticks. That's a lot
of word. I wish there was a word that was shorter to describe that.
But yeah, just a bunch of bundle of sticks in the woods,
tied up and uh yeah, I guess I would be creeped out if I
was in like a real secluded part and I saw that there's nothing around.
Go on the other way, right, because who the hell in the right
mind is going to be out in the middle of the woods besides you?
Well, yeah I probably would. I got yelled at by a park range
or I got yelled at by a park What were you doing? You didn't
find enough porn to clean up the park? Well, me and my friends
were hanging out in the woods, not looking for porn. Well that was
the thing. You never go into the woods looking for porn. You just
find it. Oh, maybe that's my issue. I'm looking for I just
have to go for a nice stroll. I have been going on Instagram live
just me in the wood. Really, I haven't seen that you were.
You were in the chat the other day. Oh I was for like two
seconds and then I exited out because I was so confused. I was also
at work. I think it was really cold and I need to move more.
So I'm like, I'm gonna go to the park, but I didn't
want to give up. So I'm like, if I'm live streaming like an
asshole, True, it gives you the motivation, Yeah, it does.
It gets your mind off the cold. And then as soon as you're done
live stream and you're like, fuck, it's cold, what's wrong with me?
I'm going back to my car. So, yeah, this is the
scene that really started the scam. Yeah, and part of it was used
for the trailer. But yeah, so they're in the woods, they're in
the tent, of course they're they've been in the woods the whole time.
Uh. And they hear like kids kids, which to me is super fucking
creepy. Yeah. If you hear little kids just laughing in the middle of
the night, really anywhere you are, I don't know. To me,
kids laughs, it's just creepy. Yeah. No, I don't like it.
Don't like a little little kid laugh And there's like a baby laughing And
they're like, what the little kids in the middle of the woods. No,
no, thank you, What would you do? What would you do
in that situation. No, I know, I don't even know. I
would probably have a panic attack. I would probably ask either for some good
stuff, because there's no fucking way I'm going to sleep, like well,
I mean here, like I'm not scared of kids, no, no,
no, but like in the middle of the woods at night, in the
middle of nowhere, I guess that is a weird place for No, thank
you. You're not finding that born in the middle of the woods in the
night, so you shouldn't be out there. Oh god, yeah, you're
right, these kids are evil. No thank you. That is terrified to
think though, just like oh no, no, no, no, no
no. And then like to think, like there's nowhere to go, and
you're in the middle of the woods. It's really dark out, you're fucking
lost. Yeah, it's fucking creepy. Uh but yeah I didn't when I
was a kid, because at this point, like it's a calming complaint,
nothing's happening. But at this point, like they haven't been physically touched by
anything, and like the tent just like collapses in on them. Oh god,
they just start running, yeah, and then uh, where the fuck
are you running? Yeah? Anywhere? Oh my god, that sounds like
another thing because I have asthma. So this this movie freaks me out because
I'm like, if I have to run and it's cold and it's dark and
I'm lost, I'm going to die and you don't have your inhaler right.
Oh my god, it's my worst fear. I have to carry that wherever
I go. Have you seen the new screen? No, I guess I'm
not going to I was going to strike home for you. Yeah, the
main main character has asthma. It's like a plot point. That's my worst
fear. Oh god, yeah, I guess that would suck. Yeah,
that woods suck. That would sucked. You can't live in the woods with
asthma. No, the bear comes, we'll be able to run away from
No, exactly, I would die. I would literally die. Yeah.
But I like when she just turns back and goes, what what is that?
It's like because you're waiting for the camera to In a modern movie,
the camera would turn around. Yeah, but I'm like, guess what is
it? Is it? Well? Because yeah, because and that's what's so
great about this movie is because they camera like she's not really focusing on the
camera. She's like focusing on her own experience and what's going on, So
she's not thinking like, oh, I have to turn this around and capture
whatever the fuck it is, Like she's just thinking about her Yeah, that's
the thing like more modern found footage movies, like they're going to be like,
oh what is that? Like Cloverfield, he's constantly giving the shot of
like the monster, You're gonna be way too scared to eat, Like why
are you even still feel like? You got the footage of the monster?
Get the fuck out of the cityhole, what are you doing? Yeah,
for sure U. Cloverfield was another one that did the whole found footage but
with the viral marketing. Yeah, yeah, I got sick when I watched
Cloverfield. Did you get sick watching this? No? That's interesting. I
don't know why. Yeah, because this is even like even shake it it
is other other uh found footage movies that get you sick, because that's like
a common complaint about a lot of these movies. They make people sick.
I just remember Cloverfield just feeling really Yeah, I it's weird. I have
like the worst motion sickness and mo, please don't do it for me.
I can watch a found footage, shaky cam movie and be fine, that's
everything. I feel like a lot of people wrongly go back and ship on
this, but it's like, well, I think you're more mad about all
the imitations that came afterward. It's like, oh God, there's some pretty
terrible found footage movies. The Devil Inside that one sucked. The Pyramids sucks.
They're all awful. Most of the paranormal activities after three suck. Did
you know there was a new one out? No? When did that come
out? Like a few months ago. It was on Paramount Plus that app
exclusive to that. I still didn't see the three D one. No,
neither did I. Yeah, we might have to do. We just did
a worst of for Texas Chainsaw. We should do a worst of for that
series because I don't know the first Yeah, the first three. I was
a little let down by two. But the first three were really really good.
I liked them, and then yea, yeah, four sucks. I
think I have four here. Of course sucked. No, I just remember
the first one, and that was that was kind of like the same thing
where you think it's like real footage and yeah, it's like filming the cameras
in the house. At that point we caught on. Well yeah, we
caught on, but still it was like this could actually happen in really that
took from this. I mean that one was a little bit more effects heavy,
but he did the whole like just don't show your monster. Don't show
Apparently the three D one they show the monster. I don't like that,
seeh I like the stuff where you don't really know, you have to use
your imagination. That's sounds so scary about it. Yeah, I mean,
and I understand if a worse filmmaker tries to do that, it's even cringier.
But what are you gonna do? Oh God, there's a there's there's
a found footage movie about astronauts on the moon What Why Hollow eight? Yeah,
it's about the astronauts to go to the moon and there's something killing them.
It turns out that the rocks on the moon are actually spiders. That's
the movie. I don't remember it being very good. The next day their
camp is wrecked. Yes, it's completely trash, and they mentioned there's like
blue slime on things. Yeah, the blue doesn't really come up on camera.
Yeah, yeah, but what the fuck is the slime? Though?
Ecto Plaza. Oh, it's like green Slime from Ghostla. I don't know.
No, actually, yeah, that makes sense. That makes sense to
you. Okay, And here we go, speaking of other movies that rip
this off. Here we get the whole turn that damn thing off cliche,
Yeah, which I think already existed. I think there's a scene like that
in Oh, Cannibal Holocaust is there? Have you not seen that Italian work
of cinema Holocaust? You've never even heard of it? No, that was
like the found footage movie. It's it's got like actual animal killings and stuff.
Yeah, it's Italian thing. Yeah, they don't care. How are
we gonna do this scene where the guy shoots the pig in the head and
the Italian's like, oh, you get a pig and you shoot it in
the head. They're like, oh Jesus what he says? That's what like
the issa, Hey do you have the uh you have the the the turtle
prop when they cut the turtle's head off and eat it. And guy's like,
oh, what a prop. They're the turtle. There's the Turtlena.
Is that is that what it's really called? I don't even know. Yes,
Cannibal Holocaust was one of like the first, Like it's like from the
seventies. I think the first like Big Now it's about like a crew that
goes missing in the woods, and then like like the whole movie is not
found footage, but they collect the missing filmmakers footage, and turns out the
filmmakers were assholes and treating the natives like shit. It's a fake a documentary
and the natives had a little too much of their bullshit. But yeah,
all these movies, they always have a scene where like even the writer can't
justify why someone's filming, so they put in a line where it's like,
turn the damn thing off. Yeah, they're getting really fucking pissed with her
there. Yeah, care about this. We're gonna die. But honestly,
if you're gonna die, why not document it? I see you have a
note here correcting me. What happened? I say. They sing my favorite
song, the national anthem, America the Beautiful. They sing both, they
sing America the Beautiful, and then the camera cuts and they're singing the national
I don't remember that part your gay song. That is what you don't have
all the words of the national anthem memorized. I just don't remember them singing
it because they're like, God, I don't even know the words, because
they're mocking her for saying, you can't get lost in America, right,
exactly, spend too much time in Europe. All right, I did.
Yeah, yeah, I know you don't have the red, white and blue
running through your veins. You need to watch some whole Coguan matches. Oh
no, you need to watch the whole Cogan match I WrestleMania four or five,
whatever one was in Trump Plaza, and then that'll knock the America back
into Okay, mcaulay Culkin's in the crowd for one of those matches. Oh
okay, I'll definitely watch it. The camera just cuts to young mccullay culkin,
like, I know, I'm still so mad at you never met me.
Let me meet him. If if you're wondering why I wore this ridiculous
pin of Tricia's face, it was because she wasn't allowed to. He did
not like me. You were act like it was like a hangout. I'm
like, this is like a working Was that hangout you were like at someone's
house? It was a work drinking of beer smoking some weed. We did.
We did know we did? I mean maybe I don't know. I
didn't. We did go out to a bar in Phoenixville, I see.
And I don't know if I told this one. Uh, there was this
girl just plastered and she recognized McCulla goll and she's like trying to talk to
him, but she could barely stand and she's like thinking of things to say,
but she's too drunk. And her like brother's there like propping her up,
and he's like, all right, we gotta go, we gotta go,
and she's like IP and like we're all just that one. We're like,
this girl's really try and I feel like the brothers like I gotta take
her home. Like I feel bad for that girl, because the next day,
your brother's gonna be like you met mcaulay. Coul's gonna be like,
noki did it? I hope someone's freaking videotape that. Did you ever see
that picture of Tom Hanks with the guy who's passed out? No, Tom
is at a bar and this guy was passed out drunk, so his friends
took a picture of Tom has The next day they said the pictures like I
met Tom. No, fucking way. So anyway, damn alcohol. Oh
yeah, So Heather and Josh are really going at it, like yelling at
each each other. And you think this place in the hole that theyre ex
lover. Oh maybe yeah, if they're like that comfortable with each other.
Uh, they's just really good friends. Yeah, that could be too.
Probably. The next day Josh is missing. He's not there. She screams,
Josh fucking wow, which is good trying to find him and you're in
the middle of nowhere, you will scream. Mike is doing a horrible child
at audio by the way, because they're constantly using the audio from the camera
Mike. It's like Mike, literally Mike, Mike. He doesn't he doesn't
give a fuck at this point, Yeah, they uh, they're trying to
keep it together at night. Yeah, but then they hear him screaming.
Now this is creepy. Yes, so hearing Josh screaming, which fun fact,
by the way, they actually recorded Josh, like the directors of the
actual film recorded him screaming, and then they actually played it at night,
oh for the actors to hear. So actually a lot of these scenes that
we see were completely set up, like the actors didn't even know what was
happening. Yeah, I heard about like the directors will like leave him like
like notes and stuff and like the film cans or whatever to be like,
hey, in the scene, you do this right? Like they give them
like a little like things like what they should do in this scene or how
to act. But at the same time, like some of this stuff,
like the the what's it called the logo the Blair was logo, Like they
just like put that there, and like the actors weren't expecting that, so
they like wake up and they're just like why are they what? They were
truly scared? Good job over their names. Good job, Eduardo Sanchez and
Daniel Myrick. You did a good job. Good job. One of them
filmed something for VHS, that anthology series. Do you ever see VHS?
No? Both you and Crystal? How hell have you not seen VHS?
I don't know. That's an anthology series, but it's all found footage and
it's pretty crazy. You're pretty interesting. Where can I find that? Uh?
Some of them are on Amazon. Actually the newest one is on shutter
Okay, and I gave you my shutter. Yeah, you got to send
me that again. God damn you anyway, there's four of them. The
last one was kind Not all of the little anthology bits are good in each
one, but occasionally there's like a really good one that stands out well.
When they wake up right in the morning, yes, afterwards, Heather goes
out and finds a bundle of a bundle of sticks. That's a mouthful,
if only there was a shorter word. Yeah, she finds a bundle of
sticks. I don't know it. It just surrounded in like, uh,
Josh's shirt, Yeah, pieces of his shirt, his shirt, and then
she like picks it up and then she like throws it because she gets scared,
which is actually a real reaction. She had no idea, like the
actual actress had no idea what was in there. And then when she opened
it up, the directors were like, you have to go back and you
have to open it and show what's in there because this is part of the
movie. So she was genuinely scared. She opens it up and it's an
actual tooth with blood and jos a tongue in there. It looks like that,
right, Yeah, But then I went back and I researched it,
and the director actually says that it was a tooth that was donated from his
dentist, a real human tooth they used. Yeah, and the camera quality
is so poor you could have just put a pebble in there and put a
blended in Yeah. I saw the hair in the blood. It really did
look like a tongue. Yeah, that's what I thought it was. Yeah,
and that was that was like okay. As a kid, I'm like,
all right, I remember I saw this on video like after the theater
and stuff like, I didn't see it in the theaters, so I was
like, I waited a while to see this. And at this point,
I'm like, oh shit, stops getting real and I've seen that McFarlane toy.
I can't wait till the Witch shows. She doesn't tell Mike no,
she washes her hanch like that's nothing, nothing, fine, that's fine.
Well, she's probably so shocked she doesn't want this to be reality. Yeah,
we finally get the most iconic scene, number one, he with the
camera on her. I'm so sorry. I'm so scared. That really like
tugs at your heart. This scene yeah megas not, megas not. I
mean, it's disgusting, it's real, Like she is an amazing actress,
like to have the courage to actually go on camera and just not all over
and to admit to being wrong. I was like, that's great acting.
I cannot deal. Any chance you get Tony, any chance you guys tell
I've been through a breakup. Tony is very single. You should hit him
up. Although she wasn't too bad, but it's reminding me of previous breakups
and all those old resentments are coming back. Anyway, Oh yeah, yeah,
yeah, but no, my Tinder profile still that about me on my
tender profile is not working about please tell the audience here about me? So
I thought, I just cut to the chase with my Tinder profile. So
it's a picture of me, and the about me literally just says I could
be more or less like your dad, depending on It's fucking horrible, Like
why would anyone in their right mind actually message you with that though, Like
unless they have like really good, really good sense of humor. There's this
guy's fucking great look. I gotta weed through them, like, yeah,
I need something. If you're matching on me with that profile, I'm like,
all right, I'm not had eliminated a No, that makes sense.
Just cut to the chase. I was, I was pretty fucking proud of
that. Two people actually message you like, hey, that's really funny.
I only matched one person, but they haven't messaged me back. I literally
said, I'm like they said I wouldn't match anyone with this, Thanks for
proving them wrong. I haven't heard that. Oh yeah, so the I'm
so scared this was parodied so many times. Oh fuck, uh scary movie?
Did it? Yeah? Uh? We mentioned in a previous episode,
did you ever see the Scooby Doo Project? No, I heard of that.
You can find it on YouTube. Yeah? Is it on YouTube?
Yeah? Which are called Cartoon Network. They did like a marathon and they
would play commercials that you would like. Each part of the commercial was a
different segment, and it was like the two D animation but in actual woods
and it was just the Scooby Doo characters doing the Blair Witch Project. And
I think at what point they do the like, I'm like so totally scared,
totally scared. Man, Maybe this time we shouldn't have middled. I
think I even did that in my stupid fucking movie I made when I was
ten. I don't know. That was the scene they showed in all the
trailers that was like the big scene they showed in the trailers along with the
what is that? Right, and like, you know, you see the
trailer and you're like, I bet you it's a zombie lady with the flate
of moves. According to that toy, that's what it is. So Josh
calls out to them again and his voice leads them to a house. And
when I was a kid, I was like, wait a minute, a
house. There's got to be someone living there. No, no, no,
not that. If you see a house, there should be a path
that leads to a main road. How do you get to that house?
Right? Yeah? And I'm always like, why are they going? They
need resources and supplies and whatever to live off of. Yeah, yeah,
I mean, no one's living in that house, but but there should be
a road nearby, some way to get to civilization if that house exists,
and you thought that, yeah, I mean if yes, there's the boy
scout in me now, I mean, if there was a Blair witch,
I guess they can change the woods and manipulate it and they would just be
in a loop, Which is like another theory that's kind of going on the
fact that they didn't need their first thoughts should be like, oh, wow,
Josh probably being murdered. Let's see if there's a way to get back
to town, because I'm not going in that fucking house. And actually,
this house reminds me of when I broke in, well, not broke into
Penhurst Penhurst Asylum before it was a tourist location. How did you do that?
Is that? Wait? That place is still there? Did they tear
it down? They tore it down, right, they tore parts of it.
No, now it's like a Halloween attraction. Yeah, but we went
when it was not in two thousand and eight, me and Anthony and a
bunch of our friends, ted and whatnot. We went in there. We
didn't break in. The door was already broken off the hinges. We were
definitely a trespass thing, but we didn't break an enter. And yeah,
I figured I might have told the story before we were upstairs and I saw
that there was someone else? Did you see a ghost? I didn't see
a ghost. I saw that there was someone else in there with a flashlight,
and I My version of the story is I heroically told everyone about it
and we all ran away. So what did you saw someone? Yeah?
Anthony's version of the story is I ran away without telling anyone, and then
they noticed. I like my version better. Uh yeah, I think it
was just I think it was just some asshole kids like us, But we
were real scared. Were they like making any noise or was it just no
Literally we had the flashlight. I looked and I got hit in the face
of the light, and I thought maybe we were like reflected off a mirror.
But then I saw that it was someone coming out of a room.
So we we got the fuck out of there. And then there was another
guy outside, but that might have just been like security or something. Oh
my god, Well we drove the fuck out. It was like the best.
Did everyone saw the person? I mean, we didn't see what they
looked. We just knew that the figure. But yeah, now you go
to Penhurst like I went with Mike Mattay and Aaron Plays a few years ago,
and my braveness came back when I was in Penhurst because remember my version
of the story, I'm very great, Yes, of course, And when
we were there, someone touched my leg and that scared me. So to
make sure they're wearing any more scary things, I just ran as fast as
I came to the end of the Haunted House. He was so courageous.
I was, and I was, and you know, when I came out,
I'm like, hey, I made sure there was nothing. I would
have came back if I thought it was scary, exactly. I definitely didn't
run away. No, of course, not very brave. God, I'd
love to go to a haunted attraction. When I went with Mint and Riley
this this October, penny Wise, the clown kept following us. No,
but he waited in line with us, and then he was in the haunted
House with us. But to the point, like we kept getting scared and
then penny Wise would show up and I was like, oh my god,
it's just penny Wise because we were so used to him. I don't know
why the actor just kept following him. Oh God. So yeah, they
go into the house because they're idiots. Yeah, there's there's no way,
Like I understand why they would because they want to find Josh and make sure
that he's okay. But like he's screaming, so he's probably dead, about
to die. Tricy the full disclosure. If I'm in the woods, I
mean, if we're wandering in the woods, that something's gone wrong already.
But if you ended up in a house and I hear you screaming in the
middle of the night, You're gone. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, thought,
thoughts and prayers a deal. Because I was too late to save you.
I gotta save other people. Yeah that makes sense. Yeah, I
get that. Yep, so courageous. There's no way, no way anyone
would go into that house. Remind me to never go into the woods with
Tony unless you had like a fucking assault rifle. I'm not going into that
house, that's true. I'm gonna be like, go on, fucking uh
to talk about scream again. The character Sydney, she's just after five movies.
She's done with bullshit like this is see where she's going through the house
with a killer and before she opens any door, she just shoots through the
door just to be silly, because it's like she's like, now I'm not
fucking around her. Bang, Okay, he's not here, bang not here.
That's what I would be if I had gonna be like, I'd be
like, are you in there? Oh? God, at least she would
save me there you go. Yeah, I might end up shooting you,
but whatever. So Yeah, Mike goes into the basement and his camera falls
m hm. It's like, uh, oh, now what that's not good?
Uh? And the whole time Heather's just screaming and screaming, and she
decides to go into the basement. Why, like, out of all the
places in the house to go, you go in the motherfucking basement. There's
no exit. Yeah, it's dark, it's scary, it's musty, it's
probably moldy. I'm sorry, nah, not going in, not going in.
But she does go in and she sees him. She sees Mike in
the corner. Yeah, he's just standing there. And then someone knocks her
out in the camera. It just out the end. So who found the
footage? Huh? Did they get attacked by a witch in there? Or
did the witch? Like did the witch see the film camera and be like
property of I'm like, oh ship, they're gonna get fined now now picturing
I'm picturing the toy witch. They're like the tree demon being like returning this.
I don't want them to get fined, but they're dead. I just
would like to return this. I'm an evil demon witch killer, but I'm
not a thief. Here you go exactly right, like I'll kill everyone but
I'm never stealing anything. Oh Jesus, Well, people aren't gonna want to
go into the woods and film stuff if they realize they're they're not gonna be
able to return their cameras. And yeah, that's the whole thing. It's
gotta keep it's gotta keep people wanting to come back, and people will rent
less cameras to students if they're getting killed in the woods and losing those camera
and yeah, that's the whole thing. Got to fix that. So this
ending, what was your initial reaction when you were a kid. When I
was a kid, it was just like what what what happened? I don't
know, like I feel I was just really scared in general, and I
didn't really think deep into it, like oh, who got the footage or
anything like that. So that's like a really good question because you're thinking,
if they're really in the middle of the woods, who the fuck is gonna
go out there and just find this random house. I mean, eventually people
have to search for them. True, And I guess if I have the
park Ranger, I'm like, well, they probably ended up in that murder
house. Let's get over there. I remember being nine ten whenever it came
out on video and going what the what? Right? They were just like
what happened? Like thisby sucked? I was like not happy as a kid.
Well, yeah, you're Tony, You're very skeptical anyway. But like
I'm also watching like horror movies like demons are all popping out and stuff,
and I'm like the whole movie, I'm like, they hype me up for
that. Yeah, what the fuck was that? I can see that,
But at the same time, like they just left it very open ended.
I then watch it again in high school. Yeah, video production teacher showed
it to us for some reason, and then upon rewatch and I'm like,
oh, you know what, I'm less, I'm definitely more cynical, but
uh, you know, my refined my film palette and I'm like, you
know what, I kind of like this war. And then I watched it
again in college. I'm like, you know what, when I started doing
my own documentary stuff is when I really really started to appreciate this, and
I'm like, this one's pretty great. That is, Yeah, it didn't
need a sequel, didn't need two sequels. It did not at all.
Well, you know, the directors actually have like four different alternative endings because
are those available? I never watched them. I'm pretty sure they're available.
I haven't seen them, but I know that they have four different ones because,
like the producers were like, this movie ends in such a way that
everyone's just gonna be like, what the fuck, Like you made me sit
here and watch this and we don't even know what the fuck happens. So
they made four different alternate ending like kind of I forget. I think one
of them is like Josh comes back or I don't know if that's true,
but like, all different things happen, and then they just went with this
one in the end, the original ending, They're like, why do we
have to explain it? You know, just leave it open for interpretation.
It's the opposite of para normal activity. Did you ever see the original ending
on that? I think there's two endings. I don't know. I don't
well, the one original ending is she like kills the boyfriend, right,
okay, and then the cops come and the demon leaves her and she's confused
and then they shoot her. Right. I think there was another ending,
but I from what I remember, apparently Spielberg watched the movie and suggested it
that she have like a scary face. Because Spielberg is full of bad ideas
these days. So that's why that movie. It's like, all right,
you have to give them something, so they're like, here's a scary demon
face at the end. I don't like that part paranal activity. I'm like,
yeah, it's the very end, so who cares? Oh the other
one and she kills herself. Oh, she walks in and s lets her
throat. I think, yes, I don't remember, but I like that
this did the opposite. It's like, well, let's just leave, yeah
exactly. I understand, like I was annoyed back then. I think me
being annoyed was more of a result of the hype around the movie, sure,
and not the movie itself. Well you never see like who the actual
Blair Witch is, which I think is why a lot of people were pissed
off about it. I think it's because the movie had such a big promotional
push and spral marketing, like you were expecting something big and then it's like
scary bundleistics. But yes, I'm here to return the camera. So she
does. In the end of the movie, ending is going to she gets
on a broom like flying montheotypical. Yeah, so I yeah, I I
appreciate it way more now, Yeah, for sure. No, I mean
I think it's a great film. Like looking back, I think what makes
it a great horror movie is that you don't see what's going on. Yeah,
Like you don't see what the actual thing that you're afraid of, and
it kind of makes us think about what scares us and how we would feel
in that situation. And I think that the acting was tremendous honestly for like
such amateur they like freaking out right, yeah, like I know some guys
who would do that exactly. Now, have you seen the last broadcast?
No? You know what, I don't remember if I saw it or not.
Well, we need to watch it. We should because I love that
filmed locally all right, So the last broadcast came out before this, yes,
ninety eight, right, yes, And I think that movie was like
famous for actually being like like broadcasted into a cinema like digitally. I was
like the first one that did that. I think, I forget what it's
about the Jersey Devil. The Jersey Devil, right, well, it's like
the same thing, but they're looking for the Jersey Devil. Yes, and
they apparently tried to sue the blair Witch people and then stopped. Oh well,
actually I heard that the blair Witch was done filming in ninety seven and
it took them two years. Is that what happened? Okay, yeah,
that happened sometimes. Like we mentioned in our Dread three D review, everyone
says that movie's a ripoff of the Raid, and first off, cops caught
in a building with bad guys. That's just die hard if we're gonna be
real technical. But Dread was actually filmed first, but since it had so
much visual effects in three D, it came out afterwards. But everyone's like,
there's a ripoff, Like, no, it actually was first exactly.
Yeah, so maybe that's why they backed off. But so a few years
back, so no, I haven't in a hotel room party in LA with
no No. A lot of things happened that night. One of the guys
at that already was real weirdo ended up running for congress anyway. Oh yeah,
so we were there and uh, this guy like big exec dude.
He brought his friend who claimed to have been one of the producers or directors
of the last broadcast. Interesting he claimed, Yeah, I don't know,
but uh yeah, we were talking about it, and he was still bitter
about it. Really, he was still bitter about like the whole Blair Witch
copy. Yes, yes, yeah, Like we were talking about him,
like, man, you're not like over it, like it a while.
I was like twenty five years ago. It was a while ago, Like
I know it sucks, but like, come on man, and oh,
I guess like no one's heard of the last broadcast least I have. The
only time people hear about the last broadcast is when you're talking about the right
we should watch the last broadcast? That a Patreon bonus. Yeah. Yeah,
So I don't know if I'm gonna throw some alleged leaves here. I
alleged we met someone who alleged to have been the filmmaker behind the last broadcast,
and they were very very bitter about it still or that was a crazy
person who was lying to me. I don't know, there was ay,
I mean, if they're that bitter, I feel like it's there was a
lot going on that night. Welcome, I've not seen the last broadcast.
We like this movie. Let's let's finally check in. Yeah, let's see
what they're done. Let's see what happened? Are good friends? Riley Tony
just sort of God, this was the address for the Screenway offices. Where
could they be? I don't understand where where are they Riley Tony? Oh
god, I think I see something in there. Oh God, it's not
them. Oh no, fu Well, that ending was kind of a letdown.
Whatever, Trisha, where can we find you? Well, you can
find in the woods, not in the woods, not going to live in
the woods like you. I am on all social media at Trisha's Italy YouTube
well, trying to do my YouTube thing, but you know it's a little
hard. Yeah, I was gonna say your last video was like ten months
ago that I kind of do that guys and try it. But I have
a website trishas Italy dot com and Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, so you
guys can follow me for Italian lessons and daily Italian culture videos. And you
should go back and watch Cannibal Holocaust. I don't think I want to do
that. Yeah, you should read about it, though maybe no, because
the director like, oh research it. The director like had to be brought
in and improved. The actors weren't dead because because people thought it was real
Oh Jesus, it's like, oh, they're not dead. It's a movie.
Oh god, oh God, let me find the actors. Oh god,
they're alive. They're alive, I swear. And you can find me
in your local state parks looking for porn. Collecting porn so that no one
watches it. Yes, I collected. I catalog it. I put it
in a folder. Again. My last copy that I found was in two
thousand and two. It's been a rough couple decades for porn woods collected.
You need a new career, Tony, And hey, if you're a creepy
pervert, come on, let's continue the legacy. Throw your porn as long
as it's legal porn out there? Who makes me do this? Also,
you can find me on Patreon, patreon dot com, slash hack the Movies.
We have some fun stuff on there. Recently, me and you did
a Ghostbusters twenty sixteen commentary track. No wonderful film, definitely don't recommend.
What was scarier the play which fucking Ghostbuster made Tricia didn't get to be in
Well, you were, but you didn't get to be on the panel for
the all female Ghostbusters episode because you're like, I'm leaving the country. I
was supposed to go to Italy. Yeah, so to make off for it,
we put her on the commentary track and we watched it early one morning.
Yeah, and it was very miserable. I had coffee. I needed
to put some coffee to get through it. So check us out. There
a lot of stuff on Patreon, download the podcast feed. One day.
I'll do voicemails again. They're piling up. Oh yeah, I keep forgetting.
We have a lot of Doctor Harleyquinn voicema. I love doctor Harley Quinn.
I just want to say hi to him. He's a really good friend.
There you go, there's your Twitter for the week. It's gonna be
blown up. Yeah. I will continue voicemails hopefully this next month coming up.
I'm going to get back into it. It's just I had to stop
and then everything's been so last minute. But I think I'm back on track.
I think it's twenty twenty two. We got a new year, yes,
and uh yeah, so let us know. Do you like the blair
Witch. Should we do blair Witch too? Oh? Yeah? Should we
do blair Witch twenty six Oh? But I will read twenty sixteen. What
I will recommend and I streamed it a long time time ago, the Blair
Witch game that came out. I really want to play this ship. Did
you play it? Yeah, I just said I streamed it. Oh yeah,
obviously, you just said that if you would like to play it,
we could play it. I'm really hungry. I haven't eating today, so
my brain's not working. Yes, the game, I don't know. I
don't remember it having too much to do with the movie and there are like
stick demons it yeah. Yeah, Well I was watching an interview with the
director of The Blair Butch, and he said that the video game is very
similar to the movie, whereas like when you see the stick figures of the
blair Witch, that means that you're gonna die, like there's no way out.
I don't know, as we said, he's lying, but it is
a very good game. You have a dog, Yeah, you and your
dog lost in the woods being hunted by Oh I thought you might I have
a dog, Like, yeah, I have a dog, Tony game.
You have a dog. You have a cute dog that's going around with you
and I think you're looking for like your brother or why do I have a
dog in the middle of the woods. The poor dog's gonna die. I
think at one point you do find it then, but yeah, it's like
the you gotta like actually, there's like the whole thing that you have to
be nice to the dog and pat him occasionally so he's on your side.
Uh No, it's a fun game. You ever played like Outlast or Layers
of Fear, It's similar to those games. But yeah, I actually kind
of want to play it again. Can we do like a VR version?
I don't have a VR. I don't think it was a VR game.
I should be. I didn't make the goddamn game. I'm sorry, but
yes, maybe I'll fire up Twitch again. It's been a long time since
I did Twitch. But we are premiering during the daytime now, nice,
so I have Monday and Thursday nights again. Thank god. There you go.
Thank god. I can play video games unless unless unless at this recording,
we've only done one daytime premiere, unless they're doing very bad, in
which case, oh god, damn it, I don't have Mondays. We'll
find out, all right, goodbye everyone, tapes. Hi everyone, Tony
from Hack the Movies here, and welcome to talking about tapes here on the
Hack of the Movies channel. Hello Joe from movie Dumpster. Hello Tony from
Hack the Movies. Hello Trishia from Tricia's Italy. Oh, I see you
finally wore your leather suit that you were supposed to wear in the Matrix episode.
I am, and I'm really happy that you gave it back to me
after the Dune Okay, god, you guys, all right, it was
on loan. It's clearly different. You have a silver zipper. Yours doesn't
come with booties, like the little boots that are attached them off. The
collar's different. Yeah, so me and Joe dress up like cool guys for
the Dune episode and that every simple person's like, oh, it's Tony wearing
Tricia's cat suit. It's like, which, by the way, that only
tells me that that had him and Eva did really well, because that's the
it's literally the only time you wore it. Well, No, she wore
it in the Matrix episode. She appeared five cents. Yeah that's right.
But yeah, people remember, and they were like, oh, Tony's wearing
it, but just Tony, like, you're also wearing the suit. But
they're like, now, only Tony's wearing the leather suit. I don't exist.
Yeah, it's only a total Tony is the man here. But then
I'm just like and then I go on Instagram someone says it. I'm like,
hey, Tricia squashed this rumor. And then you're like, oh,
yeah, that's totally my chasm. Well, anyway, I assume you're dressed
all dark and gloomy because you're really related to the character of Kim in today's
film. Yes, Book Book of Shadows, blair Witch two, not the
blair Witch Project too, that's your first mistake already. What that means?
Yeah, oh yeah, let's build up to that. So this movie has
a lot of problems. Uh, I did not see this one. I
didn't see this till like years later. Oh really. I remember seeing the
trailer for it and I'm like, what, this doesn't look like what I
thought a blair Witch sequel would look like. And this is when I was
younger and wasn't ready to take risks, and I'm like, why aren't they
just in the woods with cameras again, that's what I want. So I
didn't see it. I saw it years later. I'm like, Wow,
this movie's really bad. Bad doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of the
shit. Yes, this movie is Yes, when did you see this?
I saw it when it came out, and I've already reviewed this movie,
by the way, Oh you have. I just can't seem to outrun the
devil. And here we are again. I learned some things about this movie.
When did you see this? Because you're you're like the resident blair Witch
fan, I know, and I saw it as soon as it came out,
and I remember really liking it when it first came out of well because
we were kids and it was like old the new horror movie. That's sound
everybody's talking about MTV. Yeah, there it is, like it was fucked
up for like an eleven year old. However it was, Yeah, it
was pretty much I can see that. So there were problems right away.
So the original filmmaker's Artisan Entertainment, how are they doing these days? They
were like, hey, Hacks and films, blair Witch did good, Let's
do another one. And apparently the filmmakers were like, now we're not ready
yet. Let's like wait a little bit, sure, and then Artisan was
like goodbye, and they just did the sequel without them, all right off
to a bad start. This is the last writing credit of the late Dick
baby who wrote House on Haunted Hill the year before this, Oh really,
which is one of the missing episodes of Talking about tapes, but you can
find it on Odyssey. That's one of the ones that YouTube glitched out.
Yeah yeah, but I did like House on Hont Hill. I do like
the House on So is it Dick Beebe's fault? Is that why he's never
worked again because of the last movie that wrote? Well, uh, well,
he died eight years later, so I'm wondering if just things were going
on in his life died eight years later. We have to go to the
tape because video never lies. I'm going to make sure what happened next.
I was like, wow, this is the last Oh yeah, this is
his last writing credit. I'm like, what else do you do? It's
like, died in two thousand and eight. I'm like, oh, I
guess I didn't look too far into it. But I'm like, oh,
I got oh, hold on one second, one second, sorry, sorry,
sorry, Tony. We're literally in the Hello is that Dick Beebe?
Hello? Are you? I'm doing good? I'm actually reviewing Book of Shadows
Blair Witch two. Have you seen it? Do you have any opinions on
book? Of Shadows blair Witch two. Why Wow, you really quiet.
It's almost as if you're a computer and you don't know how to reply to
the question. Have you seen Book of Shadows blair Witch? Too? So
I bought a place recently, but when I was looking for places, much
like so, I thought that was a real person and then you just screwed
up your rental. No, no, no, So there's two things that
happen when you look for an apartment and when you're looking for a job.
Eventually your number will get on something and you'll just get spam calls all day
alone. And I've been getting spam calls all week long. Oh yeah,
So we'll talk about that another day anyway. So Dick BB's dead. This
is directed by Joe Berlinger. He had a lot of experience doing documentary stuff,
which is shocking that this is not a found footage movie when you think
about that. This is his only like traditional kind of film up until a
few years ago. He directed the Ted Bundy film with Zach Effron, which
also sucked fun at me like that, like, I know what you're talking
about. I was pointing at him because I think you mentioned it in a
recent episode it's not good. It's not good. No, because it look
I get it, like there he's it's a satire sort of, But I
don't I think people Ted Bunny is such a prolific, uh serial killer that
I think painting him in that light and then exposing them to people that who
don't know who he is or aren't familiar with the story to a movie like
that is a bad idea. They like glorify it. He's uh. Ted
Bundy has been talked about it. It's like being handsome and stuff, but
like, you don't cast not. My friend Dick made fun of it on
his podcast recently. He's like he had a fucking uti brawl. Shit,
it's just like you look better than what you would expect a serial killer to
look. He wasn't a handsome question mark anyway. But no, they glamorize
it because don't you want to fuck Ted Bundy? No? Because you you
no, No, that's the thing. White women definitely, do you know
how many obsessed? It's an issue? Why are you all so obsessed with
true crime and glamor? Do you mean you all? It's not all women.
There's also nothing wrong with all white women. All white women are really
into true crime. There's nothing wrong with Jessica. If you're editing this,
how many true crime podcasts do you leave a note white? We love true
crime, and they love the glamorization of like real murders for some reason,
not glamorization of real Well, I guess maybe some of them. Maybe some
of them do not you. I'm saying not making blanket statements, but like,
it's interesting to read about serial killers and and their and their stories.
The media that promotes all these killers can affect people, which is the theme
of this film. You should start hashtagging this like hashtag true crime. You'll
get a ton of You'll get a ton of subscribers. Shout out to my
friend Carl. He does a true crime podcast called The creep Off. See
it's a guy. Yeah, this is like they kind of made this podcast
because they hate a true crime podcast and it's they try to make comedy out
of some of the worst stories I've ever heard. Definitely listened to The creep
Off anyway. The film is about how media can influence people, is it.
Well, that's what it was supposed to be about, and then the
studio was like, we're gonna chop it up and add a bunch of bullshit.
Hey, we're gonna put some he just needs more gore in here.
Just tell you what Berlin to go in your backyard film. Some bullshit will
stick it in the movie. Five weeks before it gets released, what do
you say? Yes, that is literally what happened. And then they titled
it Book of Shadows. Did you guys see a book in this movie?
Only the one that dude's writing about shared hallucinations? Were their shadows in it?
I don't think so. Maybe the shadows are the hallucinations. That makes
sense. We know we're coming to see see You really have to have an
artistic thought process going in this film to really appreciate the deep things that are
going on here. Yes, there are some subliminal things that are cool in
this, but then there's also random images that are part of a game called
the Secret of s Server Reverse. Let's we forget Shadow of the blair Witch
to the mockumentary that accompanied that. Before that, I think, get a
second mockumentary, Yeah, because I think isn't Shadow of the blair Witch connected
to this? Well, there's Curse of the Blairwitch for the first movie.
Yeah, Shadow of the blair Witch is this one? Oh okay, it's
for this one. So there's a game that you can play with this movie,
this tape. At the end, it gives you all the rules and
you have to reverse the tape much like the characters do in the movie,
and you find all the clues and it gives you a message. And I
was like, Trisha, this is gonna be awesome. We should play this
tape. And then I found out that this big movie YouTuber, Cecil Trachenberg
from Good Bad Flicks, he already did a video on it and he played
the game and it got a lot of views, and I was like,
well, shit, Like, well that would have been really fun to do.
However, shout out to Cecil. He actually helped me with this movie.
He I watched his video, he d I mean, he's a big
blair Witch fan like you. Sixteen one, we still haven't seen the twenty
sixth. Oh my god, why do you guys keep you sleeping on that
one? Check it out because it looked really bad. Anyway, it looked
really bad. I don't know what this would right away either. Joe Like,
anyway, he really helped me out with this his video. It shed
new light on it. So I went into this movie with like a with
an open with a different mindset, and it colored my viewing on the second
or second or third watch through. But yes, before we get into the
movie, for sure, it was your birthday last month. Oh god,
and you weren't here. Yeah, you weren't here. However, I'm seeing
something with my mind's eye. Oh no, I am I think it's in
this box. I think there's something in this box for you, Tricia.
It's your birthday gift. Really, yes, I'm seeing it with my mind's
eye to pull it out. Oh god, no, pull it out.
My mind's eyes sees it's the Todd McFarlane blair Witch action figure. Oh wow,
it is the sickhead variant. Fun fact, the one on the cover
there, the the feminine variant is very expensive. And Tricia, you're a
good friend. You're not a three hundred dollars good friend I count, Nor
are you a four hundred dollars toy? Signed by Heather Donna Hugh fred I'm
sorry, I think I am. Well, I'm it. Look, I
was looking for a place. So yes, that is your birthday gift.
You finally have the blair Witch. You I've always wanted it. So now
when you watch The Blair Witch Project, you can sit this next to the
TV and you know that this is out there exactly well that I don't know
how. It's too big, quick fireling your sh it's too big. Is
that the Witch from this movie? Yeah? Wait? Oh no, no,
yeah, it's promoting both films on VHS or DVD. It's just so
funny. They hype up this one and then they mass produce this one that
makes no sense, nothing, and they mass produced both. He always did
variants of stuff. Well, you can't find the other one because that's the
one people wanted, I think more the Tree Witch. Anyway, let's get
in. You're welcome. I'm a great friend. I'm not a four hundred
dollars signed by Heather donad Hugh and the other So this movie and this threw
a lot of people off. This is what they call a meta sequel.
This is where it's like the previous movies are movies in that universe. An
example would be a Nightmare and Wes Craven's New Nightmare, What's it? A
modern say ample would be Human Centipede two. It's about a guy except obsessed
with the first movie. So it's one of those hell Raiser hell World,
which I watched recently with Henry Cavill's Superman. Yeah, in one of his
early movies he gets killed by Pennant. So yeah, I don't think anyone
expected that to be the case. And that was the cause. How did
you feel that? They're like, hey, that first movie didn't happen.
I think that I don't know. How did you feel, Joe, You're
wrong because it did happen in this movie. No, no, no,
So in this universe, everything from the documentary, the Curse of the blair
Witch, everything Rust in part, all the backstory happened. Just the movie
was fake, right, yes, but everything else happened. So and like
you have a movie, yeah, in the wake or the fallout of the
actual Blue Witch project. Yes, based on nothing fictional things, but still
adopting blair Witch lore. Yes, and working into this movie like it was
a real thing. Yes, Yes, they were real excited about their lore.
It's stupid, dude, So apparently this did happen with Burketsville, Maryland.
Super fans just flock the town. Yes, if we do blair Witch
three, can we go to Burketsville Maryland. I think we should. We
should go to Berks interviews with the Lady that sold rocks. So I do.
I do kind of like the opening with like they're showing like all the
actual footage Roger Evert and stuff is in there best part of the movie because
you're like, Okay, we're gonna just do the the found footage thing again
exactly but a little bit different. Yeah, and you're right, I do
love the old age, like, yeah, we sold rocks, and I
just say that they're from the Blair Witch and people were making stick Man by
the way, they're a hidden stick men all throughout this film. Yeah,
subliminal stick men. And again I would i'd point them all out, but
Cecil already in his video eight years and by the way, it wasn't even
like just like oh eight years ago, Like oh so this has been covered
for a while. Cool anyway out there. I really I really like good
Bad flicks. They're they're a good friend. Uh channel, yes, let
me see here. Oh, speaking of good bad Flix, you have a
note here, well, yeah, from the Good Bad Flix review. I
just I really like his reference to Italian playwright and author Luisgive. Of course,
we always have to mention the Italians. Yes, we have two Italians
and a Sicilian here. Oh wait, wait what she's already defended me.
She gets mad with Sicilians. Pretend not Italians, pretend that are Italian.
So if you are Sicilian, you are Italian. I just want to clear
they're jealous of you? Are they jealous of Malta. It's like, oh
damn it, Malta got out of Italy. It's another country. Yeah,
but it was part of it is very proud to be part of Italy.
Okay, okay not according to the comment section of TikTok anyway, we're on
hacking movies when we're here, we're family, right, guys. Yes,
so six characters in search of an Author. Yes, there's the six Characters
in Search of an Author, which is the name of the Luigi book.
So each character actually represents a part of society and so as Good Bad Flicks
goes into it. When you guys check out his video, you can see
the different roles that yeah, they represent, like how different people reacted to
that first film, or its just like urban legends and stuff in general.
We find out Jeff was in the hospital when the first player, which came
out, but he saw it. Eventually he's capitalized really into it. And
then we get flashbacks of him in the hospital and this apparently was all added
by the studios because they wanted to make him look like he was like a
crazy killer dude. And it's the worst hospital set. Horrible. It looks
like a set from like nineteen sixty five. I'm saying, like the nurses
are like nineteen fifties dressed. Yeah, the doctor smoking in his face,
I expect to see like Renfield down down the way right, like shocking him
with stuff, shoving tubes into his nose and stuffed a moatmeal or chicken broth
or whatever that is. Yeah, and like the it never looks real.
No, no, it never like the padded room. I'm like, that's
the best paddit room you could do. Like, but we also never come
back to this. Really it's there to like flesh out the character questions or
was it in the movie. It was added five weeks before the movie.
No, sure, Yeah, but like apparently there was a whole thing where,
uh, the reason he's in the hospital is because he like stole a
baby and they took it out into the woods or something like that. That's
not in the movie. That got cut out. Yeah, or it wasn't
shot or something. That's the other thing. There is no alternate cut of
this, right, well, is there a fan edit? Yes, and
no, I'll get into Okay, okay, sorry, I didn't mean to
jump the gun on that. That's okay, that's ay. There's no official
and there's probably a reason why. Yeah. Yeah, So this was supposed
to start with Frank Sinatra music, which yeah, that crazy, which which
would have like been like, oh, that's funny, a really happy song
to set up the thing. But since the you know, the writer did
so good on House and on Hill, they're like, now, throw Marilyn
Manson in there. The artisan was like, MTV baby, get Marilyn Manson
in there. We're gonna get Rob Zombie in there, and those were very
smart decisions. How's artisan doing today? Yeah, so we also get random
images of people getting murdered, also filmed way later, all the images of
like that the murders. The studio was like, now we need some murder
in there, just random flash throw it in there. This film was a
lot more glorier than Yeah. Yeah, the original didn't really imagine imagine,
like not having to show something and be scary exactly, you know what I
mean? Can you, Joe, give me an example of a movie that
didn't show anything and was scary. No, not show anything, but not
not directly, Like I don't like the Blair Witch functioned the first film.
There was no crazy specialism. There was project Oh yeah, that's that is
a good example. That is a good example of that. Are you patronizing
me? No? No, no, no, I'm joking, Like it's
like, no, it's funny. It's like, why did they add all
this? This is a sable to a movie that didn't do that. It
was very popular and then Gangbusters and was made for nothing and like why wouldn't
too many noises the whole the whole Dune episode. It was like, I
swear it's not gas. The idea of artists and being like, let's make
this a movie movie and not a shot on video found footage movie is just
fucking insane to me, Like it's bizarre paranormal. How many paranormal activities just
were like, Okay, we're gonna do found footage for like fire normal activity.
Learn the lesson from this to not do that exactly. Yeah, So
uh, this the framing device is all fucked up, like jeff is being
questioned by the cops Jeffrey, yeah, leg But by the way, I
love the sheriff when he's yelling into the woods like threat no, god damn
Blair Witch and I'm like and I'm watching, I'm like, yes there is.
Tricia has an action figure of it, right, variation thereof yeah.
So yeah, well he's questioning Jeff there with all this. Yeah, it's
like there's blood in your van. And then this wasn't they moved all this
around the interrogation. It should not have been or there was a better way
to do it, and they did not do it well. Confusing so you
see like a Quentin Tarantino movie. You ever see Memento, Let's like do
that. Oh my god. No. The late nineties early two thousands were
like everyone trying to do like uh, and that's fine. You don't have
to play a movie. Yeah, you could have a non linear movie.
But there were filmmakers that tried to do it and we're not doing although this
isn't the filmmaker's fault. No, this is an after this is an afterthought.
Uh. Yes, So you've been in pain in the ass in this
town since you were tan that accent. So yeah, he is running a
tour. Uh. And it has a couple, Steve and Tristan and they
are writing a book. Tristan believes in the legend, Steve is a skeptic.
And then they have the girl from Erica from the Texas Chainsaw remake,
Who's the Wicked? Why? Look? I get it. Like you mentioned
before, how good pad flicks went into like each one as the stereotopic character
of society. It just does not work the way that they wanted to work.
I already made the joke in the previous Blair Witch episode. I'm like
met a couple witches. They're mostly girls who went through breakups. Did I
mention the moon cult in that one? No? I don't think. So
I knew a couple of girls who like, after a while got like real
into this group of women who like are really into dancing and praising the moon.
That's okay. And then they both conveniently both of them have been through
bad breakups and then after they got boyfriends. I never saw a post about
the moon again. Now they're living deliciously Tony. Yeah, so Kim the
goth girl who you yeah, you texted me when I was watching this before
I saw when I was before I saw Good Bad Flex and I was just
like, this is a shit film. I told you I was watching it,
and You're like, I like that one. I like the goth Girl.
No, that's really the only thing I could remember about this movie.
I don't know why. It's the best takeaway from this film. Sure,
Kim director as the goth girl. Yeah, so she is hanging out on
Eileen Treacles great who was in the Curse of the blair Witch. She was
one that was killed by the blair Witch round yes, yes, uh.
And then before one shot, her name turns into the word further And that's
part of the game that's at the end, which we would have played,
but then someone beat us. Keep in mind, how how how late does
the VHS come out after the movie's already in the theaters a while. I'm
sure this stuff was not in the theater. I'm sure they added this to
the VHS release to make you want to buy the movie. Yeah, probably
the game at the box office, but a game. Actually the box office
did it really? I think it did fine. But it's one of those
things where like the the reaction was bad. They're like, oh, we're
not going to get lucky with another one. I don't see how anyone would
not want to go see the blair Witch after seeing the first one. So
I'm sure it did well. But yeah, I did well, But it's
one of those like you know people shipped on like the End Night movie Last
Airbender. Oh yeah, because the reason that ship on it is because Jackson
Rathbone's body double was really bad. Had they cast me, who got paid
for one day to try on outfits to be his body double, I'm pretty
sure the movie would have been more well received. Yeah, but that movie
actually made a ton of money. But the reception was so bad that the
studio was smart and they were like, we're not gonna get lucky the second
time. No more sequels comeby. This is this is a sixth sense.
No huh, this is right on the tails of six sense, like hum
all that stuff in shit. But yeah, no, Like this is an
example where like the movie did well, but they they were smart realizing a
third one would not do well. They were dumb from the beginning of this
production. Well obviously, so don't call them smart ever again, Well they
were they were they were trying to put a band aid on the shores.
Some people fuck up and then they just keep going. They were smart that
they quit after they fucked up the first time. You yeah, do you
have a note about the Oh no, I just thought that the goth girl
Kim was Heather from the first film, just dressed up like a goth chick.
She thought it was Heather. So Heather just came back. I don't
know. She was like not like her, like in the act like from
the actual movie, but like the actress. Oh no, this is totally
for some reason, they have like the same voice, and I don't know,
they look nothing alike. They also thought it would be fun to use
the same names of all the actors again, which they did in the first
one, but the last names are changed. They weren't allowed to use the
last names. But those are nobody people. That's why it worked. These
are like actors in Hollywood. Yeah you know. So, yeah, they're
on the the Blair witch Hunt tour. Uh, And they're gonna go to
Rustin Parr's house and film it the house that is demolished, which apparently happened
in real life because so many people kept going there. They destroyed it,
and they're like, someone's gonna get hurt. Let's pull that fucking house down.
Yeah. Uh. Kim is a psychic question mark. She uses her
mind's eye. She just tells people things. Yeah. She's like, oh,
you're pregnant. Yeah, yeah, you're pregnant. You don't want to
keep it right? Your husband wants it? Yeah? Abortion. She's like,
Hi, I just met you. My name is What the fuck?
If somebody came up to me and said that to me, I would like
get him into chokeold me, like who are you? What are you doing?
How do you know all this stuff? I mean, if someone came
up to me and told me I was pregnant, I'd be like, hold
on, wait, hold on, not pregnant. But just like anything the
movie Junior, was it liked? I mean, it's possible. So yeah,
they get to Rust and Parr's house and there's a magic tree. There
any comments on the magic tree the significant I didn't watch the documentary. Was
there a magic tree in the documentary? Like Granny Willow from Pocahontas it's talking
to him and shit, like tree Beard or the Great Day two Tree documentary
film Pokemon. I think there is in the video game, the New video
game. By the way, there were like three early two thousands PC games
for blair Witch. I kind of want to hunt those. But yeah,
the new one, which I am going to get in VR, I think
there is a part with like a real really weird scary tree, so maybe
he had something to do with something. But yeah, the guy's like,
where the fuck did this tree come from? But again, we're we're in
the universe where the blair Witch does not exist. Yes, right, no,
no, no, the legend exists. The movie was just fake.
It's like if we made a movie about the Jersey Devil. It's like,
obviously our movie is fake, but there was this pre existing legend. That's
the universe we're in, right, But but the legend of the Jersey Devil
is a real legend. This is a made up legend. Well in this
movie, it's a real legion. I think it's dumb. Joe I didn't
make the movie. I tell you, I'm mad about it. Blame the
writer. I mean, he's dead, you're gonna have a hard time reaching
him. But you know, just he was going out like this baby,
let's just text Heather Donahue. Yeah, be careful what you say about Heather.
Goddamn, I'm trying not to. I was going to and I'm not
going there. We're not gonna cut it out. I had to edit the
last Blair Witch movie the day of because I made an obvious joke. But
YouTube system is broken, and they technically thought I broke their terms of service
because I told Heather Dotty you to mail us some stuff that she is involved
in. But it was carely a joke and YouTube was like, you can't
do that. I'm like, shit, you can't solicit that. Heather,
You're like shit. Then she really owes you, now, Heather Donna,
you you can make up to it by just sending nice stuff to our mailbox.
That's exactly, yes, nice nice stuff. Uh yeah, then we
get more images of murders. Get used to those. Whenever the movie thinks
like, oh the audience might get bored, throw some murder in there.
Those poor foreigners write out who they are? So wicked girl, Yeah,
trying to communicate with the witch. May I may I have permission to take
this? Leave? Thank you to take the leap. Thank you. That's
nice. I think it's very sweet. How she is with nature. How
did she die in texta Shane, So I want to I want to go
back and just watch that. I want to put that scene in this movie.
She tried to run away, and I think leather Face like just totally
like a chainsaws are on the ground. I want to say, got a
fleather Face just showed up all the wicked stuff though, isn't even like actual
wicked stuff. Yeah, it's like, oh, yeah, wick is you
know about the earth or whatever? Okay, by the way, at one
point it's sorry you again, typical white woman. She's just like, we're
already an oppressed minority witches and the movie made things worse for us. It's
like, oh my god, shut up. Was that a thing when Blair
Witch came out? Was there the backlash from the wicked community? Just see
it would be like, oh, this movie's gonna make my life really hard.
I won't be able to practice anywhere. It's like, yeah, you're
very oppressed witches. There's a lot of stereotypes around though, and I do
feel bad for Erica so well. I hate witches. As I mentioned in
the Midsummer Review there, they were bad. They were a problem because they
kept taking everyone's brooms and flying away, and then people couldn't clean and then
the rats came and that's how I got the black pig. They're like,
oh, how am I going to clean up all this trash that witch flew
away on my broom with their flying monkeys. If they're not like making deals
with the devil and doing black magic, I don't want to fucking know about
it, Like it doesn't matter. Also, now this might shock you guys,
but I have I have it on good authority. Witches aren't real anyway,
you don't say yes, I mean, we'll see what our two point
five percent female demographic has to say, which is onn't just female? Yeah,
you also have warlocks? Yeah, what do you think about warlocks?
What do you think about the movie Warlock? Oh, Julian sand signed me
up for that. What do you think about the movie Warlock? Too?
If anyone MCD or a warlock or whatever, please leave a comment and wrong
prove him wrong for once. That always pissed me off. In Harry Potter,
they're like wizards and witches and it's like, hey, no, it's
warlocks. Well, wizard is like the light side of the warlock thing.
So like if they like it's weird with the witches because it's just white witch
or a dark witch. I guess I've seen Wizard of Oz No, no,
I'm say the bubble. Yes, so wizard and warlock, they're two
different things. When practice is good magic, when practice is bad magic.
I did like that Thevicho. Oh yeah, well that was like classic folklore.
That's a great flick. I did go back and watch Hackson again the
movie I talked about the Black and White one movie, which so where are
we at here? So yeah, everyone has oh wicked Girl implies that Heather
should have owned those two guys in the tent sex magic. Now we're fucking
doing some Alistair Crowley. Shit, what are we talking about? I told
you there was like a love triangle. I told you, yeah, it
was when those cameras went off. Who knows what happened when those went off?
Something went in. So everyone has a unique take on the witch,
and it leads to some conversations and arguments, and again, this is kind
of interesting. You could see how this could have been interested. I wish
it was a handheld camera, like walking through the woods talking about this kind
of thing. I agree, yeah, like the documentary guy do it?
Why would they, but yeah, well he wanted to make a real film,
Tony. They run into a rival tour, the Blair witch Tour.
He's the Blair witch Hunt. They're the Blair witch walking. So ridiculous in
my opinion, because it's like, okay, you have people from Germany,
from China, they're just coming to this small town in freaking Maryland. Yeah
that people travel to see stupid ship. It was just it was cringing when
people come up here to run up the fucking steps of the art museum and
then we're going like it happens. It's cringey because it's like racist is hell
these racist stereotypes. Oh my god, Okay, should there should be an
Italian guy there flipping a pizza like the Witch. I love the videos did
recently, like no one knows what this is. They're like, stop doing
this to your grandmother. Anyway. I do like that they tricked them,
but they're doing like they're so obviously lying. They're like, yeah, we
were scared because we saw something at Coffin Rock, and they're like, yes,
Coffin Rock, there are many scary things going on there. I know.
The way he was acting was so obvious and then they're just like,
we gotta go to Coffin Rock, Yeah, because we want to camp out
at rust and Pard's house. You get out of here, yeah, like
we'll switch. And if you missed the first episode, how dare you?
Uh? And if you never saw the first movie? I don't know why
you're watching this, but thanks for being here, like sharing, subscribe?
Uh. Coffin Rock is where they found the what was the eight dead bodies
strung together, but then they went missing when the cops came back, so
that's where they send them. There's also stuff of like this the Silver War
uh era people like getting arranged in a panel grind. Yeah that was the
Coffin Rock. Yeah, and the and the and the heads of the children
that rest in park killed okay, yes, yes, And then everyone parties
hard. Hold on, Yeah, they're already smoking like three fucking dubes and
they're already like three quarters of the way down a bottle of jack Dancer before
they run in these people. And aren't they like screaming at them in this
party don't get out of here getting we'd we're the blair Winch hunt. I
do that all the time. I go to the woods. I drink I
have a couple of shots and then I just immediately start yelling at people,
this is a fifteen year old woods party. They are way they are way
too old to be having this kind of party in the woods. We just
asked our friend's older brother to get us booze, and we got some weed
from some shady dude in a seven to eleven parking line. We're going out
through the woods to do these drugs. I hate it. And then they're
going to find porn because yes, you know, they're going to clean it
up. That's all right that I have how that I have a man on
the show Woods porn. You're familiar with it? Yes, thank you.
I went into a deep dive of it on our Critics two episodes. Yes.
Yeah, by the way, it's so funny, like she was like
oblivious to this. I loved how many comments we got from people being like,
oh, yeah, I found porn in the actual Yes, I don't
know how women don't fight the porn, and that you're in the same woods
as us. They're not walking through it though, like you guys are sticking
to the trail. If there's a party, they'll be that'school we gave you
in a second, but us hobbit people we're fighting the we're looking at the
porn. I just that was the happiest moment. I like just seeing so
many men being like yeah, Tony, I remember five, and then like
how I think, because that's how much it affects you as a kid,
like specific memories of what kind they found. They're like, oh, yeah,
I found a Hustler magazine. It was this cover. That's crazy.
It had to gotten there by like again, stealing it from your dad or
your friend's all the older brother or something like bring it out there and just
leaving it there because couldn't take it home with you. Yeah, look at
the point in the woods and leave it here for somebody else to find.
Yeah, you go to the party, You're like, here's my part.
I hated woods parties. I hated woods party. It's like drinking in the
woods. I just didn't like it. I love it. Yeah, I
think I've been to one, and I was like, well, because we
lived in like northeast Philly, so we had like the woods, but it
was still around, you know. When I moved to Bucks County for high
school, Like a woods party out here probably would have been cool. Woods
party in the city because you could still hear the city, like it was
a higher chance that a cop would walk through and look for you. But
I'm sure on Facebook there's a picture of someone that took a picture of me
peeing in the woods during a party because I was so bored and they thought
it'd be funny. Just didn't like woods. I liked hanging out in the
woods. I just didn't like specific where underage let's go drink in the woods
parties. I've just never gotten into them. I was a fan, and
uh, these but these guys are all way too old for this. They're
like thirty somethings. Yeah, and we're like smoking dubes, we're drinking booze,
we're taking mushrooms. Apparently. Also, the one's pregnant and one's pregnant
is pregnant. She hasn't made up her mind yet, and she's getting hammy,
and she's making up her mind right now. Let's just slug in that,
Jack Daniels. But speaking of her, she has a dream where she's
drowning her baby like the Blair Witch did, and in the water you see
stickman figure. Uh, and then she wakes up and she's like huh,
that was weird. And then all of their stuff is destroyed, the book
that they were working on shredding, the camera equipment destroyed. It's raining from
the sky. There's pieces of paper raining. Yes, Erica is the only
one who's like fully dressed, so she's suspicious. And then kim her mind's
eye. She sees the tip every time she said mine's eye wanted to punch
the tep. You know where they are, Tony, They're exactly where they
found the tapes from the original Blair Witch which wasn't real. Which wasn't real.
It wasn't real, Thank you, thank you. It wasn't really a
witch a switch. Oh god, Yeahica, they're my tapes. I need
to litter my betamax. There my take wait delivers that line is so funny,
so Trishasmus. Oh no, I'm sorry, Tristan sorry wait wait wait
wait. They think that those fourign people came back and trash there. Oh
yeah, after a crazy night of partying and getting totally shit hammered. They
think those poor people came back and hit got hammered in black Down. It
must have been those other people who broke everything my cameras and ripped my book
into tiny little pieces. Look, I found blacked out a couple of times,
and I've woken up to the results, and I never blamed anyone else.
I was like, yeah, I probably did this little shadeless all that
anxiety. I never woke up and went, yeah the blur witch that damn
Blair. Maybe that last time, right, maybe, well that one time
it was, but all the other times it was probably me. But yeah,
so Christen, I'm sorry tr at that time she has a miscarriage,
because that's what we needed in this movie. Apparently the studio was Again,
the studio wanted blood and gore, but they were against like the bloody crotch.
You can't have blood come out of a vagina. That's unacceptable, and
I strongly agree with and I've I voted for certain legislation on that. In
the constant. I just I don't know why I do this review. I'm
so mad. So anyway, so instead of so this is horrifying, and
then all right, so they cut back to like the interrogation. So I'm
thinking the interrogation is happening this day, sure, but that's not the case.
This interrogation is for later because it's cut like shit because it's cut like
shit. Yes, because it was not supposed to be in the seat.
So instead of grieving or getting help or just processing what happened, they take
Tristan in a Jeff's place, the Scary Factory, to look at the tapes
and find out what happened. Why would you go back to his dirt bag's
house. Your girlfre in or your wife or whatever just had a miscarriage.
You just went to the doc. You are going We are going home.
That's it. The excursion is over. And Jeff bought a scary factor.
How do you feel about his factory? It's a freaking disgusting bachelor's pad.
He got it from John Kramer. He bought it for a dollar. Jesus,
they're still freaking chicken and the I love his security system, but get
like dogs. Barking on a speaker like that scares people. And there's only
one bridge to get into the building. Apparently that he can't afford to fix.
He can't afford to fix. Oh, but here's where he makes it.
I like, this is where he makes his stick men and merchandise to
sell on the bay full time job? Is that what he does? Yes?
Again that is literally what he does. How did you ford al this
video equipment? No? From the he makes a lot of money doing this
Blair witch shit? How many people? How how much is he charging for
a stick figure on eBay or dirt from Birkettsville. Yeah, people will buy
stupid ship people. I'm not arguing that, but the idea of selling enough
money to buy this entire like I don't even know what uh c I a
television, Well, he's monitors and shit around. If there's something stupid,
people will spend money on it. I don't know if you know the show,
but there was once of the show and they got like five or six
women to sign a copy of Ghostbusters twenty sixteen and it sold for over three
hundred dollars. I think we were out to dinner and I almost fell out
of my fucking chair when you told me that. I was like, oh
boy, that was gold. By the way, that guy's a super fan.
He loves that he got that tape the DVD. That's the most money
that's ever spent been spent on that film. I feel like you think so
maybe other than the money me spent to make the movie, that is the
most fun exactly I got banned from a subreddit for that. They the subreddit
that hates me. They got cod figures. They got so bad because a
fan bought the tape or because of your they were making fun of it.
And then I posted a link saying like, come on, guys, pay
me, and then they said it was self promotion. So they finally banned
me after years. But they were so they like they were fully expected knowing
to buy it and then it's sold, and they were like, anyway,
I love it. You can go say awful shit about people, but don't.
Don't you dare tell him about anything that you're working on. So I
couldn't believe this. So the first time I watched this, I missed this
line. I'm assuming it's been like a few days. Did you have to
play the game to get this? Okay, I assumed it had been a
few days or a week, but no, Steve goes last night we were
camping. I'm like, wait, she had the miscarriage this morning? Yeah,
oh, apparently she has hypothermia and she's cured everything. I had a
miscarriage and the doctors were like, that's messed up. Anyway, You're free
to go. And she's not like I need to go to the hotel.
I need to like call my mom and cry saying this. He's like,
no time for that, honey. We got to go look at the scaring
tapes. Yes, nasty factory again, you killed my baby. Let's go
to this third bags and watched these tapes in the middle like the same day.
We're not friends. Nobody's friends in this movie. These are strangers.
Here's what happens. Here's what happens. And I'm Jeff. I'm like,
hey, man, I gotta if you find something on the tape, let
me know. I gotta take care of this. I'm not like being like,
oh yeah, honey, get the fuck out paying for an overnight's stay.
We gotta go watch the scary tapes. I could not believe that.
So the first thing they find out is the magic Tree is missing from the
tapes, and they see a flash of dead bodies at coffin Rock. Oh,
who could that be? I don't know. I guess we'll find out.
And yeah, they're just they're this whole part of the movie. I
feel like this is something that I would like in any other movie. All
the weird visuals and s trippy dream stuff, it just doesn't have any place
here. Like, Yeah, as the rest of this movie goes on,
it's just a bunch of things happen that don't have a means. And that's
the thing. I think it's meant to be, like, Oh, it's
all psychological, but doesn't feel that way. Oh yeah, how do you
feel about the Little Ghost Girl going backwards? Like you brought it back with
you? I don't remember that was that at it. I feel like that's
something that might have been added. Again, these are all connections that you
should have watched that other documentary and watch the fucking tape and played it backwards
and did and did the game to understand any of the stuff that's going on.
Yeah. Uh, Steve cries in the future when he's been interrogated.
It was an accident, Christ because we're about to watch a scene of him
trying to hook up with Erica. She's like seducing him and then she like
slices his stomach open, disgusted. But then they step out of it and
they're staring at each other and just like, do we just have a weird
dream? What's going on there? We're having shared hallucinations, Tony, Yeah,
there's that book, that hallucination that ties into like the twist at the
end because he's fucking crazy, which again, well like when they find out
like what happened when they were black ties into that, and again this would
all be interesting, but the movie is just so choppy and the acting sucks,
Like I'm sorry. The actor is not the best. None of they're
bad actors. I've seen a few of them and other things, but they're
not. Jeff just looks too late nineties. No, I can't do it.
I don't know. I really like him though, but yeah, girl,
So they find a naked girl on the tape and it's Erica. Oh
can you zoom into her face? Of course I can. I can digitally
scan it and hot up the resolution and like that's not how that works.
No, you can't do that with magnetic Chase and I loved Uh. Yeah,
so you could do that with film. Yeah, that's the thing.
People don't realize that because they watch CSI and they think it's real. No,
you can't enhance like digital, like digital caps off at some point.
Yeah, like there's no enhancing film. You can up scale well from from
a master. So on actual film, you can scan it and like blow
it because it's light on celluloid and stuff. But like, like there are
certain movies like what is It? My friends talked about it, like Tron
Legacy. I think that movie's always going to be locked to ten eighty because
that's the highest resolution they filmed it in. Yeah, a lot of movies
digitally are filmed in like like eight K and stuff, so eventually they can
be upscaled, but they're going to hit a point Yep, you can upscale
them anymore. Don't need to, you don't need to. No, but
this is like a thing movies kept doing this or like enhance enhance, Like
that's not not how it works. It's like blocky and then it's it's just
like it's clearly a zoomed in shots. Took another shot. That good.
If you could play the Futurama episode where they make fun of that, where
they're like blow it up, enhance, They're like, no, that doesn't
Actually there's a bunch of big cells. They're like, no, that's just
what it looks like. We don't really death. Why is it still blurry?
That's all the resolution we have big doesn't make it clear. And I'll
be damned if Jeff has a technology to do it in his in his dirty
He's like, I'll do it in five seconds, and I'm like, but
yeah, no, fuck you. So the naked girl on the tape was
Erica. I thought this was weird, Like, so the actress is naked
on the tape and then every other time she's naked the rest of the movie,
she's got her hair covering her. And I'm like, was that too
much boobs? You can't have too much nudgy in this, ye, mar
the kids studio thing or the actress is like, I'll do it on shitty
be chess quality, but not with the real cat. Well you can't make
out that. You can hardly see them nipples. But yeah, people are
starting to lose their cool. Uh they are. They all start getting runs
on them. And Erica has the thorn rune from Halloween six, the Curse
of Michael Eyres. That's that's me having a strike. Yeah, so she's
in the cold of Thorn. I guess this takes place in that. Now.
This is take place in the ashvill cut of Halloween six. This is
the producer's cut of Halloween six. This is also the original uh intro scene
to Halloween five in the same universe. So Kim is like, fuck this,
I'm gonna go to the store. And I didn't know this until I
saw Cecils video. But the repair man is rustin Park and I'm like ghost
of rust and Park. Yeah, and he's does a fucking refrigerator. Yeah,
and he does the whole like I'm finished after life. Yeah, he
does the I'm finished and it's the same actor from the documentary. He gets
he never gets up, he just disappears. But I like his tools are
laid out like a stick man. I didn't notice that. I like little
ship like that, like creepy little stuff like in Antter movie. Yes,
but yeah, if I didn't, if you didn't remind me about that documentary,
if I didn't watch these video I've been like, the fun was that?
Who cares? That's my point. You need to watch fucking five other
things to figure out what's going on in this So Kim, people in that
freaking town are so rude. Yeah, the dudes are being assholes to Kim.
She's mean to the girl at the front desk, hits her with her
shopping Yeah, what are filling the shopping cart with? Because I didn't get
that was that like yogurt. I don't know what the hell was in the
shopping car. It was the Book of Shadows. Apparently we don't lack your
cand around here. Get out of here, you, I do like you've
got person. So Kim argues with the girl filing her nails and something.
No, no, she just she just fights with her. She just argues,
that's right. Yeah, sorry. I do like when she walks out,
like the guarding tools are just covered in blood. That's kind of cool.
That's like a cool visual. She gets attacked by those asshole dudes,
and then she almost runs over the kids that rust In par killed. They
just show up for like a split second and cause an accident. Again,
more lore that you need to get from the documentary or else. You don't
know what the hell's going on. It's like, where are these kids?
Yeah? Everything, Now you're a blair witch nerd. Sure, but don't
act like you're not a nerd. You got the fuck it's a I don't
feel so horrible anymore. She's got a stick band tattoo on her back.
I figure one, so blair witch nerd. Okay. Jeff turns around and
he's a guy in an electric chair was he? What was that about?
Was that rustin par Like, who did he turn into? There? Unless
they electrocuted rust and for his murder. Yeah, but when Russell Park killed
those kids, there was no electric chair. Oh yeah, I guess that
makes it. Who is the electric chair guy Shocker from West Graven Shocker?
It was Brian James from the Horror Show travel into TV. So he traveled
into the movie for a second, I'll be back. So yeah, he
turns into a guy electric chair that he's like coffee coffee. He's so weird.
I hate caffee because she's like his servant. Go get me coffee.
Now, well, he's a cult leader. That's what he brought all these
people to his house because he's brainwashing them coffee. There's some green tea.
It didn't work. It didn't work, thank you. So the next day
the van is totaled, like like a dinosaur crushed the van. I think,
like the way the van is totaled for being parked. I'm like,
all right, a fucking t rex just wandering in and stopped on it.
That's the only thing that makes sense. A t rex was also a witch.
It had a little hat and a room, just put it. I'll
just put a pin in that because I wanted to come back to that later.
Okay. Uh, they're like our van who's totaled? And then they
all have runes carved into them. But in the future when they're being interrogated,
the runes are gone. Kim's like, what the hell is going on?
They also find out that Erica is missing and she lied about her parents
because they call her parents and the like, we don't have a kid,
and they're like, I know you don't have a son named Jerry. They're
like, we know you disowned her for being a witch, Like, no,
we literally never had a kid. But do you think that was part
of the hallucinations? Who's to say? Who were they all on LSD like
from the beginning and they were just taken. Dab suggests that they're all suffering
from group hsterias. Yes, there's a French word for it, and I
always forget it. I forgot the name and I didn't. I try not
to remember any French word because I don't care. Maybe there's an Italian word
for it. The words Italian and Sicilian words matter. What's the I don't
know, right, did I get that right, okay, so yeah,
I love the sheriff calls. He's like, put on that god dandy fight
dar tut. It's like, I don't think the sheriff knew what people Maryland
sound like. He's the worst too, because like he's the big cartoon character
of this so any semblance of seriousness, as soon as he walks in,
he's a god what. I love it. I love that they turned the
TV on and the sheriff's just behind the reporter being like, what the fuck
did you do? And at no point this is the reporter go like,
pauls, I think we have new information, Sheriff, do you want to
say that louder goddamn would so. Yeah. Apparently they found the other tourists
all murdered and shrung up at Coffin Rock. Yeah. But I love when
they turn on the TV though. It's like, as soon as they turn
it's like breaking Tony was in the shape of a piano. Grialies were laid
out in the shape of a ground. Yeah. He didn't tell them at
channel. There's only one channel turned on the TV, and it's just like
it's like cartoon network and they're like, oh yeah, I love I love
Flintstone Sheriff like, no, Channel four, you fucking more, we found
your body. Sh So they're all suspicious of each other, and Jeff really
thinks that Erica is the witch because he saw a video of Herbie. I'm
like, oh, Persephone, I bo that's not even a thing that's relative
to like Persephone's I forget where she lays in mythology, but like in terms
of wick and stuff, it has nothing to do with a witch hurting anybody
or like killing anyone. Yeah, it's stupid. He's bringing he's like bringing
out the stereotypes. He's like, Okay, well you're into this wicked ke
hitting the microphone. Johannah, curse that. Johannah, curse that microphone.
She hits it all the time. Lloyd Coffin came in, he hit it.
Everyone just hits that when I'm there, but when I'm here for some
reason anyway. Yeah, it's just the stereotypes. Yeah, so they're all
suspicious and it's the thing they're doing. Yeah, the thing. Why I
love the thing. We should watch the thing. We should Why do we
watch that other? The thing? I don't know what you're talking about,
and that was really bad. Why are we doing it this late in this
in the movie though, who who had done it? Yeah, this should
have been done a little bit earlier. We were all blacked down somebody by
the way. If they had cut out the flashing to murder and the interrogation
stuff and put the interrogation were supposed to be, this would have come earlier.
Ye would have been more entertaining. Well, sure, but they didn't
do that. Again, not the director's fault, studio, which one of
you killed these seven people? Of you? Sorry, which one do you
killed the seven people? Like? Well, if I had to guess,
I think multiple people killed the seven people, it was definitely that woman that
was dancing naked, because she's a witch. Yeah, but none of these
people look like they're John fucking Wick. I don't think they're all gonna be
taking them out at once. They get the stuff to cut them up,
ninja. So so naked Erica tricks Steven into walking on the bridge and it
collapses, tricks him. Yeah, she's like, come on to the bridge
or whatever, uh or whatever. He almost dies. I like that.
Trystan comes out and she's like huh all right, He's like what the fuck?
Oh, let me see here, Tristan thinks she's having dreams that belonged
to the Blair Witch, and she's like, I like this. She's like
blah blah blah blah blah, and then she runs around the bed blah blah
blah blah. And then she runs around the bed and apparently the the shelves
in the background they make like a pentagram, I think, and then they
change at some point. Does she have psychometry? How does she? When?
Do you like? That's the only reason she's there is to do this
whole stupid thing where she's like, I'm in touch with the blair Witch because
I had that dream that my baby died just like the blair Witch did.
Would she drown that kid? Yep? Yeah, that's why I didn't go
home because I need to be here. Yeah. Crazy one gotten the girl
who had hypothermia in a miscarriage yesterday to come here. Maybe she should still
be in the hospital. Yeah, it's almost like she has like, uh,
she's sick or something, yeah, or can't think straight. It's almost
as if you shouldn't have taken her to the Scary Fact three to look at
Fairy Tate. She might be on meds. We don't know here, just
have some more acids. We slepched some mushrooms into your fucking stew or whatever.
And then it turns out that Jeff has files on all the people there,
or they found files in Jeff's thing. Yeah, He's like, those
aren't mine. He's there. Yeah, it's like, how did he get
files? Jac said the same thing about the bodies under his house, those
aren't mine. Like, I actually getting back to my friends who drew the
creep up. I was listening to their Creepiest Pennsylvanian episode and Legit, one
of the guys that Buffalo Bill was based off, he like murdered a bunch
of girls and they found the body parts, and apparently his defense was,
oh, they were there when I moved in, lasted jeffyer Man. I
don't know how they got there. Why do these girls chain up in your
basement? Why do you have body parts of your freeze? Like, oh,
they were just there. Those files of those people were just in Jeff's
thing that he bought for a dollar, his warehouse. They were just there.
Wait, wait, but those files are because they're in the police station,
the interrogation thing. They're like, what is all this? So that's
the thing where it's like, okay, so was jeff the the the the
the sort of mastermind behind this is he's the Is he the bad guy that
recruited all these people and like called them up or like made them come out.
Do you know what orchestrated this whole thing? It's unclear. It's unclear.
Mind blowing. Yeah, no, the sheriff says. The sheriff says
he's outside, and he screamed, open neck, done door. Jeffrey,
is this after still a live We got to put him in something. He
would be great though, Just say the same character. Right if we go
to Birkettsville, I'm dressing up like the sheriff. Oh my god, yes,
let's make this happen for an excuse to get a cowboy. I'm gonna
address up like the sheriff. I'm gonna dress up like him, like the
sheriff, and you could be the I'll be the witch man. Yeah,
I'll be the witch. We've got to mention it. I don't know if
we did mention it. So the scene in the first player witch this is
like a thing that I read when Heather goes, what the fuck is that
they apparently had a guy covered in like white gauze and like the effect would
have like glown, there would have been a figure, and then they just
didn't film it. While they were running. Oh, they were like,
fuck it, I think it's I think it's better like that. Yeah.
Absolutely, Sometimes it's better when you don't see that you don't see it.
You do see it in that twenty sixteen one spoilers who wouldn't want to see
this, We're gonna watch the twenty six Well, the twenty sixteen one.
Fucking I never tried to look for it. And then a thumbnail came up
and it's for a clip from the movie, and they're like, you see
the witch scene? Then it's in the thumbnail. I'm like, oh,
yeah, but it's not. It's like, could you not put it in
the thumb It's not as egregious as you think it is. It's like,
you see it a couple times, but it's very very, very very quick.
By the way, at the time of this recording, I have not
seen the new Batman movie either. In the comments section of an unrelated video,
I was like reading the comments and then someone's I'm like, what is
this guy saying about Batman? And I think it's the entire plot to the
new Batman movie. And I read it all and I went, huh.
I'm like, I guess I'll find out if that's real. Why would you
read it though I didn't realize what it was yourself? I don't want to.
And I was just like, I think I did like a more vious
trailer reaction, and they were like, here's something about Batman and then I
read it and I'm like, oh, oh, that's the I'm like,
I think that's the plot with the twist to the new movie. I didn't
read the comments on that one, and again that would get some people mad.
But you son of a bitch, kudos you got me anywhey, guys,
I'm not like I got three Batman movies. I really liked. Everything
else is optional. I'm like it, I don't know. It's not going
to be as good as Dark Knight Rises. We all know this. All
I want to know is is and by the time this comes out, we
have already reviewed it. I just want to know, is Catwoman Falconi's daughter
like she is in some of the comics, because I want Catwoman to be
canon Italian. Huh, Catwoman's Italian? And some of the comics, you
find out that she's Falcone's daughter. Falcony was a Batman Begins, and then
in Hathaway was Catwoman. I thought they were connected, and then they never
do. Okay, it's because there is like a really good comic where it's
called Catwoman. When in Rome and she goes to Roma, she goes to
Roma with the Riddler because she saved for a fucking getaway. Yes, when
you read Batman's Dark Victory, she disappears for a bit, and this book
is what she's doing there. They want they want to see. The whole
thing is she is like his secret daughter and she could technically have all of
his fortune, but she can't prove it. That's the whole thing. But
anyway, what I've never read that it's specific to year one long Halloween and
Dark Victory. It's in that thing. Oh okay, But anyway, that
was the only spoiler I wanted and that wasn't spoiled. So we'll find out
if Catwoman's Italian. Anne Hathaway should have been Italian. You love an I'm
going to murder you look like an Italian Catwoman right now. Actually, a
Catwoman is like my spirit animal. Oh so specifically the Michelle Fivor and Halle
Berry one because they were literally spirit as. Anyway, anyway, back to
Blair Witch. Sorry got derailed with Batman. There, It's okay, it
happened. It was. It was part of a larger stopping asshole in the
comments. Don't secretly put in the plot synopsis for people are going to stop
being assholes. But please stop spoiling movies to spoil the bad ones. I
mean we're spoiling this one. Yes, the sheriff is out there and he's
like, get the fuck out here. No one turns. He stopped there.
There's actual dogs now. But then they find Erica just dead in a
closet and they all blame Steve because he was the last one who saw her.
Steve, you murdered her and propped up and she's standing perfectly sill despite
the fact that she's dead. I guess Ricka Mortis works really well well.
I got the impression that she was like under a spell or something. No,
she did definitely not light as a feather, but definitely stiff as a
board. Sorry, I knew I could get something in there. You go
the Craft? Yes? Will that be the next all female Hacked the Movies
episode the Craft. That's actually that would be a good one. I'd be
in for that. I mean to watch it, wait to just invite yourself
to thee That's what it sounded. That's what it sounded like. And I
was like, no, that's not what I meant. I watch it.
How Darren Man invade the all female Hacked the Movies episodes? I mean,
me and your brother did it for ghosts. But they're gonna skeet Olerich me
man. So Tristan tells them that they need to play things backwards, and
then she speaks backwards. So then they're like, all right, our tapes,
we're gonna play it backwards, like eight yes, So they play it
backwards and the tape plate. Now if it's if they're like, all if
this is all in their head, how does that physically affect the tape?
Like is the witch real? Anyway? So the tape takes and they find
out that they were all drunk, horny assholes. They had a fucking rager,
fucked each other. Yeah, Kim's like making out with what's her face?
Erica? Erica is like naked on top of a tombstone, dancing badly
dancing badly. Yeah, skull on her cross like that's the that's literally the
dance. And then in the tape they show that Tristan is like basically the
witch, like everyone's bowing to her, she's giving people weapons, like she's
the one in charge of it, I guess, but yeah, they they
basically turn on her. They're like, you're the witch and she's like,
no, I'm not. But then she starts acting like a witch, like
you all fucking suck. I hate all of you. I'm gonna hang myself.
Bet you won't push me off, Like like what the fuck? I
wanted to hang myself by the time we got to this part, because it's
it's just like, okay, that's a cool concept. Yeah, fine,
you got so fucking blasted that you thought this woman was like your queen or
savior or witch or whatever, your cult leader. And then you and then
you, I mean, can we talk about it a little bit? Yeah
yeah, and then you like, course these people to go kill these people,
yes, and film it. Yes? Right. I forgot where I
was going with that. Oh oh, because it would have been better in
a different movie, because by the time we get to it, we're like,
okay, so there is no witch stuff. It's just these it's just
everybody's stone. But like fucking seem fucking knocks her off the balcony and just
hangs her. Had enough of that, see ye. So yeah, they
all get arrested, and the cops put all the tapes together. Uh,
And I love how Steve's like, it'll show you on the tape what happened.
But apparently the tape that they were watching when they were all his hysteric
wasn't real. So the cops like, put the tape at It's just them
being assholes. So apparently Kim murdered the girl in the store. She stabbed
her with a nail file. That's why when she finds it later bloody,
she's like, what's that all about? Uh? They all murdered the tourists.
They all took turns murdering them. I think the Chinese guy gets like
an axe to the face or something, and you stabbed and then uh,
Jeff murdered Erica, and he made sure to be naked oring this. They
were doing a ritual Tony. It's wicking, I guess so. But when
he's propping her in the closet, is that part of the ritual trying to
hide the body, but you can't hide the stink. Uh. Yeah,
and Tristan was innocent in all of it. When they played the tape,
just like stop it. What are you doing? God fucking witch. That
last one is like harrowing, which was leave me alone and like you're the
wiaby what's Uh? None of them can believe it's happening. And then the
movie just ends off. Get out of the actually go back because I was
a wait, that didn't just end like that, Like what does that mean?
It just ends? Now imagine being in the theater watching this and then
you can't rewind. You're just like, uh so not a very good movie.
I mean, Trishia loves it. It's not a very good movie is
a very strong word. So apparently apparently there was an ama with the director.
Uh. And he did say that he did construct like a director's cut.
There is him or someone fan they constructed a director's cut, okay,
but like it's not like an official one because it was made from pre existing
footage and so it's just a recut film of this film. There is what
I yeather he did reach out to the studio to like do like an official
one, and they were like nah, but that's probably because they were worried
more about the reboot and they just didn't want to dwell on the second movie.
So it's a shame I would like to see because look, yeah,
I don't think it's a very good movie, but I think it's made worse
by the way it's edited in all the stupid shit that they had. Definitely
have the potential to make it. There's something there. I still don't think
it's gonna be great, but there is a better movie in there, and
I feel bad. I said the same thing about Dune, where it's like,
wow, you know, David Lynchy really tried to make a good movie
and they chopped it all up, and then people have this perception it's like
a movie shit. It's like, well, we didn't see the right version.
No, right, I mean I would even go to the extent of
saying even the text chance on Next Generation, like there are crucial bits and
the way that the movie's arranged is why it makes it not a pleasurable watching
viewing experience. And this probably it'll make it more coherent. I don't know
if it'll make it a better movie, but it'll make it more coherent,
but I think being a little bit more coherent, just seeing it linearly would
make more sense because the interrogation throws me so up because I thought the interrogation
was happening after the miscarriage, but then it wasn't, and I was confused.
I'm like, wait, when does this? It was just all over
the place. And I think that if they added in like the actual like
like, what's it called the footage? Yeah, the found footage stuff.
Yeah, I think that would make the film a lot better. They should
have done that a little bit, but if they wanted, they could still
be a regular movie. But if they cut to like the first person stuff
a little bit more, it might have been a little bit easier to take
in. It would have been more chaotic if they did it with just the
found footage, I think that would have been a better movie, like straight
up, even if you wanted to do the same story, you know what
I mean, and then later somebody cobbling it together because I think the movie
opens with like, this is a reenactment of events that, yeah, that's
the thing. I forgot to mention that. So, so we're watching a
dramatization of something that happened in this universe where the blair Witch is real,
but not the first player. It's so many fucking metal layers my brain.
I will give them credit for trying to do something different, like no one
would have expected this is how they would have done the sea. Sure,
meta movie, Like I said, meta movies existed before, but no one
expected that, nor did anybody really want it. But I'm like, all
right, at least they at least they went in with I mean, they
went in with bad intentions. They should have just waited until the original filmmakers
came up with an idea. Sure, but at least they didn't go in
with like, all right, more people are going to be in the woods
with cameras, Like that's the lazy way to do that. No, but
not even the lazy way, that's the smart way to do it. That's
I let's make the money way to do it. And that's why that blew
my mind when they were like, let's not do that again, which in
Hollywood they would have immediately done it again. Yes in my mind, no,
yes, And well wait, I want to go back to the van,
said oh yeah, what did you have to say about the van?
Because the van well, yeah, the big yeah, the big Oh,
that's right, it is intact. But I was going to say, the
big reveal is that it was these people that did all this stuff. So
whether it was a hallucination or not, these are all things that they did
with their own hands, whether that's the ripping up of the papers or the
dismembering of these people and demolishing of the van. But I guess I'm wrong
if the van comes back, Yeah, the van is intactica. It's not
crushed by a t rex. But there's also no dogs and no tree and
all that bullshit. Yeah, yeah, the tree is like the weird thing
to me. I don't know, but yeah. My one note here is
what the fuck is the Book of Shadow? That's why was that at it?
What the fuck is the Book of boa Fed? I don't know.
It's right, there's no book show. That episode did not do very well.
However, it did not very well, did very well. Book of
Shadows did not do very well. But the clips we put up on TikTok
did very fair. I'm gunning for you. I'm getting a lot of TikTok
plays recently. Yeah, I'm gonna be talking about Italian so MoMA me pasta
bella. So, yes, the tape ends with the game. I got
the rules for the game here. He don't watch this movie. H Within
this film are mysterious and haunting images not easily seen by the naked eye.
To reveal the secret of s or ever, must one watch the special feature
at the end of the film for detailed instructions. Two, when the special
feature ends while your VCR is still playing, hit the rewind button and watch
as clues are revealed. Three go back to the movie and find the hidden
images if you dare. I don't asterix not rate it. And yes it's
not rated. The special feature, yeah, the special features so and if
you want to see what that game is, just watch good Batflix. He
did it. Yeah, really took the wind out of my sales there.
And I love Cecil Cecil, I love you really he makes good videos.
He works very hard on those videos. Tony, he does. He's awesome.
It's awesome, and he apparently really likes us. Well good, that's
nice. And then the last thing on this tape that plays is a commercial
for the made for TV Dune by Artisan Entertainment. And it finally came in
Joe I finally got the made for TV worm energy we did. I mean,
this is this is an intense Oh it's missing the god damn booklet.
Is that where they have Oh no, you told me in the vhsd's that
they had the original movie. No, no, no, I know we
got disc one and this two, this three, I guess only three disc
and oh no, your boy Carlos and I think we say the episode's not
out at the time of this recording. It's out now at the time you're
watching it. But I picked this as the best Dune because the emperor of
the known universe was an Italian man. Anyway, they're all facts. Oh
by the way, just psro we're here. Can we do a Jella movie?
We did an opera on Patreon. You're not doing that? Weis do
like maybe what can we do? We could do like Bird with the Crystal
plumage or the fifth Chord is a good one. Deep Deep Bread would be
Amazingspiria. You don't like Suspirio. I do like Suspiria. I really like
the remakes. I still haven't seen that it's a good remake. I mean,
mcken it's your show. You do whatever the hell you want anyway.
That is it from us, Thank you for watching. Do you like the
blair Witch Project? You like a book of Shadows? Blair Witch two?
What do you think of this one? The only acceptable answer hang that up
in your part. The only acceptable answer for two is no. Yeah.
I do wish at some point they do a proper director's cut. It would
be nice to see this reconstructive properly, just to see what it would see
if it is better. Yeah, definitely watch to twenty sixteen. Both here.
Well, you're literally the only person who hype that up. It's good.
I'm not hyping it up. I'm just saying it's good. You're like,
it's the best movie ever. It should have got the oscar. This
fun, We've come, this fun. It's It's a great sequel. If
you're going to do a sequel to the original, it's a good sequel.
Yeah. Check out the game. I've been replaying the game, not the
VR version, but I will be buying after I move. We will have
a VR night. Yeah, so check out that game. Let us know
about the original games. I want to see if I can like hunt those
down anywhere, if they even fucking play. Were they on a website.
Did they have a website we can play it? Or there was like a
like a game on their website, but they made like three PC games built
around the player, which they're probably awful. They probably don't play right,
but it'd be fun to see. And uh, yeah, that is it
from us. Make sure to like, share, and subscribe. Download this
on your podcast app of choice. Follow Trisha on TikTok at Italy and Instagram
as well. And if you want to hear other people talk about this,
including Joe again, follow movie Dumpster. If you just can't get enough Blair
Witch two Book of Shadows, head over to movie Dumpster podcast dot com and
subscribe Movie Dumpster. They're doing video now and I'm there. Yeah, we're
on us. Text chainsaw for one. You sure were, Yes, Maybe
you can talk about Giallo on there. Maybe they'll show you good Italian movie.
Oh I would love to because you're like, I want to do Italian
horror films Tony, I'm like, yeah, cruel Jaws, let's go do
some Faulty. I can't believe you haven't done Faulty yet. Man, I
can believe it. He did Zombie right. Yeah, yeah, I'm not
gonna do zombie. No you should. You know how many times I got
sent the I stabbing gift. I'm not gonna do zombie all right? That
is it from us. If you happen to be in the woods, let
us know what porn you fine. Goodbye. Hi everyone, Tony from Hack
the Movies here and it's time to finally talk about the twenty sixteen blair Witch
movie and figure out if it's a d since sequel on today's episode. Hello,
Cecil from Good Bad Flicks. How are you hello, Tony from Heck
the Movies. I'm will that's good. Get a little closer to that Mike.
Well that Mike, a little closer. There you go. You think
I know how to do this? Just needs better equipment. Yes, I'm
excited, big fan of your channel. I'm glad to have you here.
Thank you. I'm glad we lived around each other. I'm like, oh
shit, are you realizing? Yeah? I would have had you on a
million years ago. I was like, you didn't like me? No,
No, you actually helped out a lot with the blair Witch two review that
we did. Your video helped you gave us a lot of good background information
we were going to play thees Er ever game. And then I saw that
you did it in your video and I was like, well, beat me
to the punch? Did it already? I beat you to the punch?
Like six years six? And then I was like, well, I mean
how many views that I got again? And I looked at him like,
ah, yeah, I'm not even gonna attep but yeah, so you guys
are probably wondering, Tony, don't you usually do these reviews with Trisha the
biggest Blair Witch fan in the world. You know, she's got that stick
man tattoo on her back and everything. She's real into it. She's real
into it. Unfortunately, Tricia was in Italy recently. She went to the
woods of Italy, probably in the Dolomite Mountains or something, and she was
looking for the famous Italian witch lapafauna. See h she went she went missing.
That's actually where I'm going after this. Yes, Frank going to find
her in the woods in the hills of Italy. Yeah. So I had
brother Frank, come on, he's gonna go looking for her. But we
realized that is the plot of today's movie. So I was like, hey,
Frank, before you go looking for your missing sister in the woods,
let's talk about this movie about looking for people's missing sisters in the woods,
because just in case, I had to watch the film, Just in case
you don't a lot from this film. Her adventure brought up any clues or
anything that a commute that I can use to go find her. I also
found a videotape that's from the future, I think, to help me figure
out. It might also be my best friend. I'm not sure we're gonna
get to the bottom of this. We'll figure that out. But yes,
the twenty six team blair Witch. I did not see this when it came
out. You just saw this recently, right. I think I saw when
it first came out. It's just to you know. I put it on
last week and I was like, I think I saw this. I don't
know, but yes, you saw this, right. I saw this in
the theater and I was very excited going in and I was very upset coming
out. Yeah, so a little backstory on this. This is directed by
Adam Winguard. He apparently maybe you know more about this. He apparently crossed
paths with the original Blairwitch guys while promoting VHS two or did they shoot something
for VHS two they I believe that one of them or both did something for
VHS two, but okay, I'm not entirely positive. So at some point
they at some point they crossed pass and those guys have been trying to reboot
Blairwitch for a while. At that point, I think they were talking as
far back as twenty eleven doing the sequel. There they developed this in secret,
did you know, Like like I actually accidentally found out about it.
Okay, the Blairwitch two video that I did caught the tension of a producer
who worked with the Blairwitch guys, and so what he did was he was
trying to like get interest in the series again, and so he took Blairwitch
two because he had seen the director's cut and was like, you know what,
this is a much better movie. Took a Delion's Gate because originally Artisan
owned the blair Witch but they sold a de lions Gate. So he was
like, let me present this to the new owners and see if they're interested
in releasing this on Blu Ray or something. And he took it to them,
had a big meeting, and I was talking to him about it,
and essentially what ended up happening was they turned it down because they were already
working on the Blairwich reboot in secret, and they thought that bringing up Book
of Shadows again would kind of like confused people, which it's I don't think
that, but they wanted to. Basically, they were doing the whole late
sequel thing. Well here's blair Witch one, blair Witch two never happened,
and now blair can't do because Blairwich two is in its own universe, so
it actually makes sense you can do that. Yeah, this is following the
trend of other secret follow ups like ten Cloverfield Lane, which was not a
Cloverfield movie. They made it in posts much like Cloverfield Paradox. One of
those movies is better than the Owner. Yeah, they enjoyed them. Yeah,
I think ten Cloverfield was really good. Cloverfield's really good. Cloverfield Paradix
Paradox. I know why they did the Super Bowl publicity stunt because that movie
was not very good. Apparently the Nazi zombie movie Overlord. I think that
was going to be like a Cloverfield movie. And then when the Cloverfield Paradox
got like ship like reviews, they're like, they're cut out the Cloverfield stuff.
It made sense because Overlord was awesome, like by itself. Yeah I
heard it was I didn't see it was awesome. It's like Wolf and Stein.
Okay, yeah, so I it was called like the Woods. They
were promoting us under the Woods, and I think one of the early posters
there was like a hidden stickman, like you had to draw and be like,
oh, the Stickman's there. I turned this on the other day.
I have seen some of these actors and other things, like the one main
girl is in Alien Covenant. She was in that awful like shower scene that
seems way too shlocky to be in an alien movie. And she was also
in that movie The Endless, which was pretty good. Oh, The Endless
was awesome. Yeah, The Endless was awesome. But I didn't recognize anyone
else except for Valerie Curry from The Tick. She's the she's one of the
Stoner the Stoner cup Oh she's okay, Yeah, she's a dottie in the
Tick. And famously, I will not watch The Boys until they bring back
the Tick. I'm so mad they canceled the Tick and then green light The
Boys. I want if she's also going to be in the Boys now anyway,
So that was me the other day. I'm like, I don't know
who any of these people are, which is probably good. I mean it
makes for the better experience. Yeah, yeah, documentary documentary wise. Yeah,
but I remember this came out and not a lot of people talked about
I think the game got more attention, which was coming out around the same
time, which I have played and was really good. I want to replay
it again because I know there's multiple endings. But yeah, I guess let's
just get into this movie and we'll figure out did this succeed as a decent
sequel or not. I have a lot to say here. Okay, get
only meat. So the movie takes place in twenty fourteen, and they say
they found DV tapes in twenty fourteen. I was just like, and this
is before the movie called it out, But as a watching in real time,
I'm like, Okay, people were still using DV, but DV was
getting pretty phased out by that point, like memory cards were taking over at
that point. So I'm like, Okay, to be fair, I used
to work at a pretty big university in Philadelphia. We up until I got
summarily laid off from there. Ok they were still using DV. Okay,
they weren't using like they were just die hard about it. For whatever reason.
I get the benefits of it. I understand, like there are some
benefits, like there's more like a memory car could be accidentally a race or
whatnot. There's more security there. But I was just like just already just
had him like from the years, and yeah, I guess add an older
camera. But I was like okay. But at that point I didn't realize.
I was like, okay, cause the documentary was assembled from DV tape.
They justified the DV tape later. Let me see here. Uh yeah,
So it starts off with a young guy watching a spooky video on YouTube
and he thinks he sees his sister, Heather Donaghue, who I've learned has
changed her name to ray Hants in real life. I know she's uh she
grows her own week. Oh. Famously we mentioned in the first go back
and watch the first blair Witch episode we did. We famously mentioned that,
and then I made a very obvious joke about how she should send us some
stuff, and YouTube was like, no, I don't like well, so
I had to cut it out of the episode. Last myth like something you
should tell us, you know, before we get into things like this.
Yeah, yeah, so don't send us anything. I don't want anything.
And what stuff I was referring to, I don't know it could be anything,
right, tried a lovely letter. Yeah, some stick figures. Literally,
I had to re edit the episode like an hour before premiere. Oh
YouTube. But yeah, she's now Ray Hanson. She's not in this movie.
I don't know who that one from the fame from the first one.
I guess from from like from being in the first one. And then yeah,
she's like regretted using her real name. Yeah, she like I don't
know, I mean she she kind of tried, like out of everybody,
she was probably the most successful as far as becoming an actress. I know
Josh uh is working as like a cameraman, I believe, and but she,
you know, she did that. She did a couple of like uh
the like tea movies and stuff after that, but never really like took off.
Yeah yeah, I never really super took off. But now she's got
her own thing going. Good for her than good for her. They're gonna
do a documentary on this guy James, who is Heather's brother, and he
was four when she went missing. Poor, that's an important detail for something
I'm going to complain about later. Yep. And he's like, that might
be my missing sister. We gotta go and check it out. Twenty years
later. Twenty years later, looks it looks exactly like muddy picture in the
thing. Yeah, He's like, I didn't see her first. Then I
freeze framed it. It's just some lady. And I'm like, I guess
that's your sister that's covering up, you know, the aging on it.
Yes, and his not girlfriend. But kind of it's kind of like the
first movie. We were like, it's implied she dated the one guy.
Yeah, uh, don't do voiceover with a shotgun, Mike, don't do
that. Take one, two, three, don't do that. She's holding
a big ass shaka mike and doing voiceover. I'm like, what are you
doing? I mean, I did it in college, but even then it
was like a last minute resort, like you want a mic like this,
that's meant for this. I think that was like a scene that they added
in once they were done, just to like add a little bit voiceover.
I literally came out of nowhere that shot. Yeah. I was like maybe
that was like a pickup afterwards. Yeah, she's sitting there on the bed
trying to use her sexy voice. Yeah, so this bothered me. The
ear cameras, which I think are a cop out thing because Adam wing Guard
did VHS, but VHS was never Some segments were more faithful to the whole
camera thing, and some were, like it was the rules of it being
found. Footage were kind of loose in the VHS movies, and I think
he wanted more camera angles and options and didn't want to have like someone like
this the whole time, so he came up with the ear camera thing.
My problem is I was doing a lot of hitting camera stuff around that time.
I worked for a big prank guy on YouTube and his prank friends,
and I had to use like classes cameras, and even the HD ones that
were coming out at the time did not look anywhere near this fucking good.
These look so good. I'm like, no, no fucking way. Maybe
so, and like with a lens that big, like fuck you, there's
maybe so mad they're shooting like thirty thousand red footage, you know. Yeah,
the footage is like so crystal clear. And by the way, she's
planning on doing a documentary, and she decides, you know what, we
should all be recording in this loud ass club with no microphones. Somehow we're
being picked up perfect great yeah for a club, great light. And I'm
sitting there, I'm like, woman, you're gonna have to like license the
music that's playing in the background. You're gonna have to You didn't get releases
for anyone on that dance floor. You didn't tell the club you were filming
there, Like, this is a fucking nightmare. Maybe she hired a bunch
of extras. So so right away, I'm already angry because the first movie
is such a good like it feels like a documentary, it feels real,
and this one, I'm just out of it at this point. It's already
lost me. I don't know if that you the same. It's kind of
a I mean I got more of you know, kind of a mix from
the first two, if you you know, just to see the way the
second one was shot without the found footage, Yeah, look to where it's
clean, but you know you still got the camera cuts and you know,
camera moving all over the place to where most people that are watching this film
are and looking at it like, oh, those ear cameras would never you
know, show something like that. I guess people just want to go in
for the scare. But while back, I shot a review with the movie
dumpster guys for Halloween Resurrection and say what you will about that movie, but
they're like little head cameras do seem pretty accurate because any shit quality. I'm
like, good job, Buster rhymes, Yeah, Buster rhymes. He was
the hero of that franchise. Look, I mean we're filming this before Halloween
Ends comes out. I assume they're bringing him back as a different character finally,
and Michael Meyer. I think that's the obvious way to go. He
lived, right, Yeah, he did live in that movie. He'll come
back as Michael Myers. Yeah, Halloween Resurrection was saved because, like I
think he originally died and they were like, no, we're reshooting the ending.
He is gonna kick Michael Myers on electrocute as ballsack. I'm like,
that's that is one of the best change endings in the world. Say Happy
Halloween with a father. I was at the TV one, Yeah, the
TV one. I was Happy Halloween, mister Falcon. Yes, So everyone's
having fun. They're drinking and they're testing out their gear. This this part
was relatable because I actually shot a I never released them, but I shot
a documentary in college and my friend trying to run across Pennsylvania, and there
were a couple of nights where we were in hotel rooms getting drunk and just
filming bullshit. So like, Okay, you lost me in the club scene,
but you kind of won me back a little bit. Well, what
what bothered me was that this was a thing where they took this footage.
Somebody had found the footage and reconstructed it. Why would that person put in
all of this nonsense? Like why would they edit in all you know,
the club and it's completely unnecessary except for plot and for this is you know,
the only reason is because movie. I mean you can say that about
the original and like why do they feel the need to and flu the guy
showing off his disturbing chest hair. I want to see a movie and maybe
this is already exist. I want to see a movie of the guy who
gets the found footage and has to edit it together, like like the hours
and hours that yeah, that's the best that they had. The police are
like why are you including this? And they're like, oh yeah, it
really serves the narrative. We're like, motherfucker, we're doing the investigation,
like the crime. I don't care about the food they had that morning.
It's just to show how dumb these kids are. They were not drinking the
night before before they went into these you know, haunted woods. But they
then none of them have any wood skills whatsoever. Yeah, you know,
dude can't even build a tent. He's a paramedic. The one guy's a
paramedic. Paramedic wraps up, wraps up the girl's foot and then it's like,
all right, you're good, Oh yeah, thing, yeah, walk
on it so itself. So they go to the people who uploaded the DV
footage to Birkettsville locals or outside of Birkettsville, and it's Valerie, Curious Talia
and her friend Lane or boyfriend Lane. Uh. They have a Confederate flag
hanging out in their house. I've spent some time in Maryland. Those do
exist. You'll find them there, but they don't like I think they put
this in there to get the one character to hate them, right, yeah,
but for the rest of the movie, and I have it later.
I now it's like they're not really doing anything directly to be mean to him,
and he is on the defense, and he to the point where like
he's become the asshole. And it's like, all right, dude, Like
if they were saying like snide things to him or throwing little jabs and if
I can understand him, for the first ten minute, they're literally laughing in
his face. Yeah, the first ten minutes. But then they see that
because he saw the flags, like these are my enemies and I have to
kill them, all right, buddy, Well let's look just wait for them
to do a little bit more. Let's put it's put out there so that
the second that you look at Lane, even Talia, but not so much.
I mean, you you want to hate this guy, and you know,
with with Peter's reaction to him, and then he wants to come into
the woods with him, and you know, right off the bat, it's
like, well, you're you're you shouldn't like his character. Lane. Maybe
they're just really big historians. You don't know. I got a beef with
Lane, man it Yeah Lane, Lane does turn into an asshole, but
he's not really one yet. But yeah, so they decide they need to
join with them. They're like, we got a film too. I got
my old DV camera. We're gonna go out there and record as they get
to the woods. They mentioned the Rusting par stuff, which, of course,
if you remember rust and Parr, the it was actually we mentioned the
first video. I think like the behind the scenes thing they put on Sci
Fi Channel was kind of more interesting than the actual movie it was. It
was good lord, supplementary supplemental material. But I remember watching that being like
that is like really cool because it felt like a real dog of Linz that
they went just for the first Blair witch was absolutely I didn't know all that.
Yeah, I mean a ton into it. Yeah. And of course
according to the player which two, that is a real thing that happened,
and Rusting Parr is in Blair for him to show up in this song are
finished now. It was waiting for him to show up in this They also
messaging Coffin Rock. I don't think they never go to Coffin Rock. Do
They don't go to Coffin Rock, But they mentioned you know, Ellie Headward.
They do all like the they throw in all the buzzwords for yeah,
for like the hardcore fans and everyone out there. Right. Also when they're
walking down that pith, just to begin with, right, do you see
the back of Lane And you could see on his backpack right away that he's
got I don't know if it's snake eyes or tiger eyes, but on the
top he's got snake eyes and then at the bottom he's got like a devil
horn or like a Baffo met character. So, including with the flag in
the beginning, there's just subtle signs through this film. They just point towards
you know how much you should just dislike. Also, when they are first
pulling up in the trucks right and they go to park, the music that
Lane's listening to, they're just a woh, just reminds me of what the
Witch not to jump ahead, but reminds me of you know, the sounds
that the Witch makes later on in the film, or right from the first
one to where maybe you know this guy isn't all together on where his brain's
at. Yeah, yeah, he's he's a character for sure. Oh I
said, beef with him, but yeah, and then this is when Peter
is being like real obnoxious towards him. It's like to wait for him to
be an asshole first please. I was like, dude, just just chill.
Peter is unbearable, Like he is insufferable in this movie. I'm just
like, dude, you gotta like fucking relax, Like why are you even
here? I did way back in twenty sixteen, I did a review for
this and I was talking about that. I was like, he is just
insufferable. Yeah, And I had people in the comments are like, didn't
you see there was a Confederate flag? And I'm like, well, okay,
but does that give him open license to just be a complete asshole?
Yeah, you gotta wait till, like, I mean, sure he could
be suspicious not have to like him, and like the level of how much
of an asshole he's being, Like that needs to be a reaction to something
that they did. They haven't done anything yet, right. It also shows
that he has no patience, like everything from the from the tent to the
I mean, the flag is you know, it's understandable, but everything else,
you know, he's got no patience, very short with everything. So
those two don't really seem like they're employeed. So that that could just be
like a parent if there's flag that's hanging out there, that was just like
the most employable couples about the house, like that Valerie Curry opens up that
door, she seems like high out of her mind. Or the dry walls
all rotted, so that was just they threw it out there to cover up
the God there's a hole in the wall. What do we got? And
we got the Confederate flag. Okay, that's not ideal, we'll put it
up there. We'll change it later, and then they never changed it.
Later they mentioned that there are underground tunnels that connect parts of the woods.
Uh, that is set up for later for an actual good scene. It
kind of reminded me. We talked about it and some other video I did.
But when I went to Penhurst Asylum, now now it's an attraction,
but I actually broke in there years ago. But yeah, we found out
they did have like underground tunnels. So the patients would it like break out
when they're being transferred, run into the woods. They all have a series
of tunnels. That's the kind of time I was expecting. Is that like
from American Arts story when they put the tunnels in because it wasn't a lot
of that season. The second Size story based off the asylum around Philadelphia.
Is that so good? I've never ever, I never watched it what I
liked. So the first the first few seasons are fantastic. Now one and
two and three I absolutely love. And then after that it's just I know,
they're all self contained. But eventually they started linking them I think,
yeah, which I don't think they should have because by the time that they
started doing it, it felt like it was too late. And then all
the characters they all played like different characters, and then they're seeing each other,
and then it was just I'll check it out. I watch a little
bit of The Roanoke one. I actually they have like that on testimonials from
a documentary. Yeah, there's found footage stuff like that. I know.
Another good film is found footage as well. That's coming out soon. They're
probably already out. Oh yeah, I wonder who it stars. Stay tuned.
Uh. So they walk through the water to get to another place.
That reminds me of when I was still in Cinemascar. We went to the
Blue Hole in the Pine barrens. It's like the Legend of the Blue Hole.
It's like it's just like this like hole, this like pool of water
in this area and it's supposed to be haunted and whatnot. So I went
there and I went into the Blue Hole and it's just a fucking hole in
the woods. It's really not a breadth. Why I am here like it?
Like people were like, oh, it's dangerous. I'm like, yeah,
there's a ton of twigs and sticks down. I see someone getting caught
and drowning. But like, all you had to do is just not go
in the water. I mean I did because I'm an asshole, but like
it's not as dang, like, just just don't go in the hole and
you're fine. But we had to cross a river to get to the hole.
So by the time we got the hole, we were already drenched,
and like fucking river water was awful. As n't bring their water shoes out
when they're crossing lakes, and why would they bring those? Be prepared?
They are not prepared. Well, that's that kind of harkens back to what
we were saying earlier, is it's like none of them have any right being
there. Yeah, they're not prepared and they're not smart. I brought I
bought like rubber water boots when I went to the Blue Hole, because I
predicted that that was gonna happen. But yeah, what's her face? Stabs
her foot here right, mm hmm, Yeah, she cuts her foot.
Okay. I thought she was gonna say like something because she screams and you're
thinking, like, uh, the hand grabbed her or something. No,
she cut her foot and they're and a twig grows out of it. Is
that what it is? Okay? Well I was right after somebody says that
that a woman pulled the girl under and then she stabs her foot, not
even running through her head. You're right, right, yeah something by the
way throughout the film, I maybe I'll have to rewatch it again. Maybe
I was tired, but like I feel like every time her foot they want
to show her foot's hurt. The folliardist just went not breaking the cellar.
It's like she's like, ah, but the sound effic is it was so
bad it got louder and louder. I don't know who the fully artist was,
but it's like, yeah, so he's sound like a bone break and
he's like, all right, I'm going to karate chop off this broust of
wood. It's like, whoa fucking boat? Sounded like a wood melon split,
something like well, apparently every time he wanted Adam win Guard, every
time he wanted a big reaction for a jump scare, he had an air
raid siren, so they would be acting and he would so I only imagine,
Yeah, by the way, what are your opinions on Adam wing Guard.
He's hit or miss. For me, I adored Your Next. I
thought the guest was equally awesome, so I was really excited. I liked
his segments in VHS, and then when it was announced that he was doing
Blair Witch, I was like, because at first I'm like, oh,
they're gonna do another one. I'm like, oh, you know what,
It's in really good hands. And then it came out and we're talking about
it. But then and then he did death note, and I'm like,
what what happened? Like you got? Did he did it? Like do
two really good ones and kind of blew it and then everything else is not
as good. I like some of his segments in VHS. Not the biggest
fan of Your Next. I'll talk about that in another episode, but I
did enjoy the guest a death note. Okay, I don't watch a lot
of anime because cartoons are for children, but I have watched Death Note.
Johannah showed it to me years ago, and I remember watching the anime and
being like, Wow, this would be work better as a live action movie.
And then Japan did a live action movie and it worked a lot better
because it was done in two hours and not fifteen sixteen hours like the anime
is. So I was like, Okay, I mean he's got a good
basis. I'll check out the Netflix Death Note and I went, what the
fuck is this is so terrible? But then he did Godzilla versus Kong and
I thought he did a great job on the right. I forget it,
So I'm internoused with him. I really there are some directors that I want
to like, but it's like like I've I've since like started liking James Wand
but I did not like James Wan's horror movies early on. Really. Yeah.
Liked Dead Silence st oh god, I hate Dead Silence really so much.
I didn't like Insidious about Death Sentence that I didn't see I want to
check out is like action movie terrific? Yeah it is. It is the
unofficial death Wish. Yeah, I was winning, he was winning me over.
I liked Aquaman. James Wand did Aquaman, and then he was like,
oh, I'm producing Mortal Kombat. I was like, that's gonna be
great. And then I went James Wand You're back on my shit list.
I didn't completely hate the new Mortal Kombat. I mean, it's it's our
it's our most watched video on the channel twenty one makes no sense. I
love that what was his name, Cole was the new hero they invented for
some reason, and his defense his like secret whatever is plot armor? Yeah,
it's literally literal plot arm. Go back and watch the Mortal Coma Makes
No Sense episode. We point out that like the metal armor is just rubber
at the points you could see a buckling. Didn't see the scenes in a
modern movie. That seems impossible. But anyway, I do enjoy the fight
scenes. That's awesome. Back to Blair Witch, Yes, back to this
movie so much better. But Adam Winguard, I think that uh, he
as far as he's concerned as a director, I think, uh he's a
really good director if he's doing his own original material. And I think if
he's going to be doing found footage, his found footage stuff works better in
small chunks. Yeah, but doing the Blair Witch. I think he I
don't know whether. I don't know if this is one of those movies where
years later we're going to find out that there was some studio meddling or whatnot,
because I know he said he shot for like a week and then couldn't
use any of the footage. It just didn't work now, and so they
really started like like working overtime to get more stuff and to get you know.
So I think it was a case of where they were kind of writing
it as they were filming. So I think that this is one where the
story may come out later. Well, I know, even like god Zilver's
Gone, he shot way more than they ended up using, so we cut
allowed out. That's why I like Lance Reddick is like fourth or fifth build
in the credits. He's only got one scene memove because they cut out his
entire shit. I know you said it's a different studio that picked it up
with lines gates to this one. But the second one had a lot of
meddaling. Oh, I'll talk about that. I think he talks about in
his video. I talked about it in the last apps. So there was
a lot of interference with that one. Yeah, Joe Berlinger Man. They
just they hosed him so bad. Yeah, crazy, Yeah, I mean
it was. That's why it was nineteen years before he did another like narrative
film. He just went back to doing like documentaries and stuff. Yeah.
So I haven't heresy exactly. It's like I have it here in my notes.
God, Peter is Peean Peter. I have it here in my jes
You can leave that. Usually. I asked her to cut out the flubs,
and she leaves them in. Anyway, you can leave that one in.
That's on me. Peter is a whiney cry baby and he leaves right
as they're testing the drone, and I assumed something was going to happen to
him also, and then nothing happens. Like I went camping a lot of
times, all right, when I was younger, used to just hang out
in the woods when we had campfires, right, and you used to go
look for you know, for kindling and wood, like around the fire.
I'm not walking a mile into the world. Ye. They're always like it
looks like twenty to third, Like I can see like people at the fire,
while they're always like, well, I gotta get firewood. And it's
like literally everything you're surrounded, you're sitting next to it right now. I
mean, I can I can imagine that. Maybe you know, they're at
a campsite, so people they have cleaned up the wood around there, but
they're also saying that people don't even go in those woods. Yeah, and
so they're shooting. They're like, they're pretty barren. With all the lightning
bolts that hit all these trees, there should be a lot. There was
a lightning bolt with the tree, which is pretty clever set up for later,
but yeah, that seemed like, seems like it's setting up something,
and it just I thought like the drone was gonna catch footage or like while
they're testing the drone, Peter see something, and then it just it just
cuts them hanging out. I'm like, oh, oh okay, all right,
Camp five stories again, Yeah, yeah and again. Stuff like this
would work in the original Blair Witch, which feels more organic and down to
earth, but this movie feels at this point, it feels overly produced.
So when you just have something random like that, it just doesn't work for
me. I don't know, Maybe that's just me. They're having too much
fun eating hot dogs. That's a note I made, so when when you
first come into that fire, who's the first one you see? And how
do you see them? You first see Lane, remember, tell me you
first see Lane, and it's through the fire with flames coming up on his
face and he's viciously eating that though hot dogs right in front of him.
Yes, And then when we zoom sorry, and then when we zoom around,
then you see the rest of the people around the fire, but not
through the fire. So again I got beef with Lane. Yeah, you're
because how he was filmed from the beginning, these subtle, you know,
imageries that you know are laid out for him through the film. So Lane's
VHS DV footage looks about us. Crystal Clear is all their four Kane footage?
Who would have thought? Who would have would have thought there would be
no difference in quality. Yeah, between different film stocks. It's like,
oh, yeah, they just hit the button on. I keep hitting the
dude everyone. Actually, I think that might be the first time you hit
a lot of people hit the mica. Johannah is the queen of hitting the
mic on the show What Coffin Hit the Mic? Lloyd, You're good,
You're good. Okay, I'm bringing him back he's hitting the mic all the
time. So the Talia character, she gives them the backstory of the witch,
which is, what's her name? It's Ellie Edward, Ellie Edward,
that's right. Who's who we see here? Is that her? Frank?
Where did this? Where? Where did you get this wonderful McFarland toy?
It looks like the one I got your sister for her birthday? So that
is I actually went to my sister's apartment. I borrowed it just for this.
I'm surprised she was willing to part with it. Well, it was
right before she went to Italy, Okay, right before she got lost in
the woods, and I was like, hey, let me hold on to
this. I think it's also because I took it from her apartment that the
blair Witch went back. That was probably might you doomed her? I know?
But yeah, I imagine like when you go in her place, it's
like above her fireplace and it's like this beautiful man like she got like a
shrine to the blair Witch right in front of the picture above the fireplace of
you and your cat, beautiful me, and she has a picture of me
with my cat. You don't know that I do you know that? I
know I haven't been there. Oh that's funny. So your sister has a
picture of me and my cat yes, the Blair witch to Yes. Wow,
why help you find her and let her know I appreciate her interior decorating.
Uh this part, I was like what what? Because they were talking
about how like, yeah, people get lost in the woods all the time.
It's like, well, you guys didn't. And then Peter's like,
yeah, we were in the woods years ago. We were part of the
search party and we didn't get lost. It's like, wait, you guys
said you were four years old. What are you doing at the search party.
I've been to these woods before when I was a kid with about one
hundred other people. You're part of those search teams? What the f was?
I went? What? Unless they were searching for years? Well there
was, there was time travel. They're not aware of time travel yet.
Maybe maybe they were, but they don't know the timeline again Dan Barry,
Oh yeah, that was so stupid. I was like, wait, hey,
hey, screenwriter, Simon, what is it Simon who wrote Simon Barrett?
Go back a couple of pages. You said they were four years old?
Fix that. But yeah, they debate why the witch is it more
active? And they never come up with a satisfying answer as far as I'm
concerned. But what do they say. Well, the one thing I don't
know if they explain this now or if they explain it later, but they're
talking about what they did with the witch. They hung her from the rack.
No, yeah, stretched out her limbs and this is a beef.
I'm gonna get to it now before because I don't want to forget it.
But one of my major gripes was at the end of the film when the
characters are walking around the house and there's this monster and it's got long legs
and long arms, and so you're like, oh, there's the Witch.
Oh they showed the witch. And then the director comes out and it's like,
no, that wasn't the witch. That was one of the victims.
It's like, but then, why did you have this segment where you set
up I didn't even realize that that was Like is that Heather, Well,
that's did he find his sister witch has been doing that? Which has been
but well, I mean, the thing is it It would have made sense
if they didn't set it up where like if they did something where you know,
and she's it's rumored that she does that to her victims or something,
instead of saying that it was you know, because then it's like, why
did you set that up? I didn't even together. They have the long
arms and stuff that, Yeah, there, there she is. That's the
witch. Also, everyone was kind of making fun of it. Lane when
he was talking about it kind of sounded like he was like supporting the witch
and saying how horrible these things were that actually happened to her because he's got
the Witch's back. And then later that night they're firing off guns and there's
wolves that are howling. For some reason, was having fun again. Yeah,
Lene is missing Tally and James go to look for him, and they
find him via jump scare. Too many jump scares in this and I'm not
a fan of the loud sound jump scares. So Lisa coming into the tent,
so he looks at it, Lisa's head it's still zipped, and then
within two seconds on zips and then runs in front of the camera real quick.
Yeah quick. Look. I get jump scares work sometimes I'm fine with
it, but when a movie has like an abundance of cheap jump scares.
I start to I start to check out. I left two points. The
jump scares just one after the other after the other. But it made me
think of that episode of The Simpsons where Homer comes in. He's like,
hey, like, Moses, do you want to Jason Hockey Bess when part
things sidcho Bob's he comes They so yeah, but it was like that,
it was that obnoxious. It was just like it was like it's all quiet,
Oh my god, yeah, they're calling for Lane, and then he
just jumps out of the one. He's like a right here, you know,
like nobody would do that. And at one point they actually like they
What I laughed was they called it out because one of them comes out and
he's like and she's like stop doing that. And I'm like, oh,
there there was the audience right there and saying stop doing that. Stop would
stop doing that. But then I really like how the way that the the
actor who plays Lane kind of plays it because then once he's found uh,
he's you know, acting as if you know, he was just out there
searching for the sounds. Really, in my head, he was out there
searching for sticks to do. What comes next? Yeah, And then as
soon as who is a James turns around and says, you know, go
back to the campfire, and then Lane just shuts everything down. He goes,
yep, you're right, go right back to the camp Like just how
like a liar would play it as well. The second that it's like,
you know, told you're told to do something, Yep, I'm gonna go
do that. Yep, get out of your way. So I kind of
like the way that that acting wise, how that scene was kind of played
out. So yeah, the next day, you're right, they wake up
with their stick men everywhere and they're like, we got to get out of
here. Someone's fucking with us. Someone's fucking with us, and they want
to bail. Then they call out the DV camera complaint. They're like a
lot of people shoot on those anymore. I'm like, all right, movie,
I got me. But I like that she's pieces together, like you
guys shot that the footage that you found which was also DV tape, And
then you're right, Ashley cannot stop hurting her foot she's walking and Captain Crunch.
Yeah, but yeah, they find out that they set up the stick
men. They get they yell at them and they get blamed for all this
up. But they're like they're like, okay, maybe we made the stick
Man, but how did we get you guys to sleep until one pm?
And they're like you drugged us, Like so like they're faking things, but
it's to scare them to stay away from the witch, but they want to
find the witch. I was a little confused on their show the Outside World
that like, you know, hey, this is occurring, even though like
they should know that if you spend the night there, you're never gonna make
it out anyway, So what's the point, you know what I mean?
I don't know. It's just yeah, that's the only kind of weird party.
Yeah, they're their motivations were all over there. And then Peter threatens
that he's gonna beat the ship out of Liketh no patience, no peener,
and James is sad. You see Peter's peener and this is us that's true.
James is himself peeing. You know that's what you do. Because whoever
cut this together was like, well I need this. The asshole cutting this
together. You see, like the cops are watching this, like you don't
need to see this. James is sad that he got conned, as he
would be because he thought he was going to find his sister from twenty years
that he hasn't seen since he was four. Okay, buddy. Also they've
they've started to go in circles, like that movie, like Blair Witch Projects,
after they found the Stickman in the Woods. After like the Project,
this movie could be just a monster movie on its own. I think it
would have done better. They do like an extreme close up of Ashley's foot
and a thing pokes out of it. Okay, okay. We never see
them back up their footage or replay their footage on a laptop of like how
long do these batteries last? I don't see a generator to charge any of
this shit, but like I saw something weird, and no point do they
go, well, let's play it back, right, Like give me the
st card, I'll pop it and we'll play it back. They'd have to
film them filming them watching yea, these batteries that last forever? Well they
did. I will give a little bit of credit where they said, uh,
I forget the exact wording, but it was like, yeah, you
got to make sure you've got a lot of batteries. So at one point.
They they did call it out at least, but still it's like how
many you know, yeah, how many? Where is your charging station?
Where is that? It's like, come on, because they never went back
to the car to like do you charge it or anything? Yeah, especially
if Lane was in the woods for five days at that one point. Jumping
ahead again, Yeah, just all like all dirtied up and time travel.
They send a drone up into the air and something slaps it out of the
air, and I really think we should have got a shot at the witch
on a broom, just like slapping it get out of here there. Yeah,
but then we close into the end of the air and it just starts
to go the other way. But then Peter's run around with POV and the
walkie talkie, and this reminded me of the New video game. Oh yeah,
this actually felt a lot like the New video game, which is actually
really good. I heard it's great. It's really good. I never played
the VR version, but the PC version was a lot of fun. Did
you ever play the Old Dust Trilogy? I want to get it. I
want to get the Dosh trilogy and play it. That looks fun. It's
pretty cool. Yeah, So yeah, the This reminds me of the Blair
Witch game, which again I think is being made around the same time,
and that like the poster for the game looks just like the one for this
movie, right, So yeah, that that whole scene is really cool.
And then the Witch traps a tree on him. It's like a fucking tree
just comes down and crush the rops it, which really got powerful since the
first Yeah, really got back. And she's also up in the ante She's
like, I'm gonna I'm gonna start a little earlier the yeah, first one,
she just made him get lost. Yeah, along just kind of you
know, uh so, yeah, I have it here. The jump scares
are getting old and Lisa calls it out. Lisa calls it out, She's
like, stop it with that. Uh so, yeah, Lane and Talia
show up. But I like this where they're like we've been walking for five
days and they're like it's only been like six hours or something. They're like,
we can't get out of the wood. I think it's one of the
scariest parts of the film. Yeah, that's to me, like to the
way that they're you know, they hear something and then you see those two
like show up just the way that they really portrayed like how scared they were
the fact of like I do, like it's been five days. I do
like when supernatural stuff fucks with time, Like I love the original Grudge movie
when like the detective sees his daughter in the future and she sees him in
the past, and like that scene was always really cool to me. So
stuff like this is kind of where the supernatural elements can manipulate like pockets of
time. It's really cool. I think it was. I think it was
a cool idea, but it just in a series that didn't need it.
Yeah, if this was the first Blair Witch Project or something, and and
they were introducing time travel, okay, fine, But with this it just
felt really bizarre because why would you introduce that as if a way to try
to explain what happened in the first one where they discover that there's time you
know, it's like, well, how did they do it? Well,
it was because they were lost in time and I don't know, it's like
it just again it it did feel creepy. It felt like one of the
more genuine scenes in the film. But at the same time, it was
necessary so much because you know, like you said, you don't see something
like that coming because those weren't the rules of the first one to where it's
like that, you know, creeped me out when that happened, creepy stuff
because they kept going in circle. So it's like, is the Witch like
manipulating like the her powers? How much can you want to get further through
this film? The crazy ship that happens, It's like, what is she
an alien? At one point, I want to talk about the worst jump
scare in the movie. Lane runs back into the woods. Talia is staying
behind and they're slowly zooming up on her, and I'm like, she's gonna
she's gonna scream, she's gonna scream, she's gonna scream, she's gonna scream,
she's gonna and then she screams. That wasn't even it's like annoying.
Now it's not scary, and you've previously called out how annoying it is,
so you shouldn't have done this cheap jump scare. Like it's like, okay,
I think it was. I think it was just to have her scream
so that you don't fall for what's coming next, because they do that scream
and then you're like, all right, that's her scream. Like now they're
gonna just get together trying and figure this out. And then it's the next
thing that happens. Well, well, first they go to sleep and then
they wake up and there's a million stick men. Giant stickmen, giant stickmen.
They were like huge. The witch is putting in over time with she's
really like building these things. Oh you wait, that's why they had to
slip so long, because she's making all these witches. She's like, shu,
it's almost it's almost keep sleeping building these more witchmen. She brought in
Sasquatch to help. Yeah, Sasquatch showed up, helps out. He walked
into the wrong woods. All right, here we go. The big monster
from the ritual showed up, collected a bunch of stuff with them. So
so Ashley wakes up and Talis freaking out and Ashley is just like you did
this, You're an asshole. And Ashley he's like out of it. I
guess our foot still hurts too, but I love Tali's like this one has
my hair in it and she's like, up, that breaks it. I
was not ready for this. She so it's like a voodoo down now,
So Ashley breaks the stick of the of Talia Valerie Curry and her body just
snaps back in head and she's bent in half and I'm like, oh my
god, I like screamed, oh fucking my part and she bends backwards.
And that's funny because that that wonderful Halloween parody that we did. In the
behind the scenes blog I posted, I showed all the shots of Michael falling
out the window at the end of the dummy we had, and there were
several takes where he kept folding in half. I'm like, we gotta do
it again. He can't fold it half. But when somebody saw Valley curly
folded half, and that's like, all right, that's really funny. Like
I wonder how many times they had to throw her yeah, and she's like
still alive and like twitching. I was like, oh god, oh my
chiropractor, that's so horrible, and they left it. Yeah, so I
do it. I kind of like that the witch is just snatching the tents
out of the air and dropping it on that just messing with them really bad.
Every time I see that. They also did that in one of the
new Like what was it not scary? Movies. But one of like the
parent activities, wasn't it like the funny paranormal activity or something go into the
woods and they made fun of that moment. I just with like a tent
being pulled up into the air like that. It's just that was I think
out of anything that was over the top. That was too much for me.
That too much. So what comes out of Ashley's leg? I said
it was an eel. I don't know what it was, no, I
it to me, it looked like like like a twig or or like like
part of a vine or something. Okay, that's moving and that's and it
makes a sound. Well, I mean it had like you know, she
had like puss and goop coming out of her let. I don't, you
know, I don't. I don't think it was a lie, but I
mean it would make sense that it was alive, but it was. I
don't know. The woods are alive because of the Witch. And I will
say I do really like the walkie talkies audio like that reminds me of stuff
that probably would happened in the first movie, just like the real creepy audio
interference. I like that shit with Peter coming through saying help me. Yeah,
like that stuff is cool. You don't need the eel coming out of
your foot or the or the weird stuff like that. Like what it was,
I guess like an infection of worm that you know, was like I
don't know, I don't know, it's gross. It was just don't Well.
There was two things. First was that apparently the original, the way
that the film was written, was much gorrier, and so they had to
cut back. They said they cut back almost all of it. So that
was probably one of the girl getting cut in hand or crunching in half and
a thing coming out of her leg was probably some of the gore that got
left in. But they said they took all that out because it didn't feel
appropriate for a blair Witch film. But they still did a lot of stuff
that wasn't in blair Witch. Yeah. But the thing why the first one
is so classic and why this one isn't is because the first one was very
much leave it up to the audience. It was very like there there was
no soundtrack, There was no gram crackers being broke every time somebody start a
little bit little, but I mean not to this degree. Was this feels
Overpurdue, This feels very Hollywood manufactured and whatnot. And we know Adam Wainguard
can do some VHS stuff like found footag stuff, so that's why it's even
more disappointing. It just was it was really just and it was it was
so it was just forced and there they had too much nonsense. They just
didn't need to be there. I really didn't need the legs scene to begin
with it, especially especially if you're going to have this character do what they
do next, which is climb into a tree to grab the drone. Do
you think that drone was really there? You think the blair Witch was just
having to imagine it. I think the drones really there. Blair Witch is
like, what is this technology? Let's put this right here into this tree
because stumb Girl's gonna want to go. Her phone is still charged and the
drone is still chargedn't didn't lose any battery at all. I love how they
were having multiple camera angles. She's climbing up, yeah, because she makes
sure that the camera is still going and yeah, cls like she can't walk
ten feet into woods, but she could straight into a tree. I was
like, because once she started the fall, I was like, all right,
that's ten feet. That's ten feet that How did she go? I
like, I'm just calling it the witch, which just slaps her. It's
not even scary, it was comics like, and then gets dragged away,
sheets dragged away. So the witch just jumped out of the tree lanes next
to her real quick and then pulls her way. I was like, damn
girl killing I was so stupid. Uh. They find the house just like
the first movie, which they mentioned in this one that the house. They
never found the house initially, Yeah, because that was my thing with the
first movie. I was like, if I'm in the woods that I see
a house. I said it in that one. I'm like, there's probably
a trail that leads to a road, and that's where I'm going. I
don't care how loud you guys are screaming in that house. I'm like,
nope, I'll go get help. I'll be back later. No way.
I mean, if I'm in the house covered in a blanket, if I
am in the house, I expect you guys to go after me because you're
so brave and strong, but vice versa, I'm not gonna help you anyway.
I had guns, grenades, anything like that. Yes, Anti Blair
Witch missiles. But the house is next to the tree that was struck by
lightning, which means they were there before, which is pretty cool. Kind
of crazy, Yes, I kind of like that. It kind of comes
in and out of time. Yeah, in and out of time, because
that's where they found the camera as well, right, so then yeah,
yeah, so that's yeah, it's crazy. Yeah. Wait where does the
witch leave all the footage under a rock? Well, under the lightning tree?
Right? Is that where it was in this one? Yeah, it
was under the lightning tree. Yeah. First well, the first one,
it was found like under like like there was a wall of stone or whatever,
like like an old dilapidated thing. No, not coffin rock, but
it was like, well I always assumed in the first one that they just
founded in the house. No, they found it like outside because it had
like it was like weathered and whatnot. And the Witch knows what cameras are.
She's aware of how they work, and she knows you might have edited
some of the footage, so she knows to leave it in certain places that
people will find it. Right. She's up to date on the latest technology,
she's online. What's these things of their ears? Oh? Those are
the new ear camera models are hot, and that'll get some one on.
She checked the She's She's like, you know, those assholes in the nineties,
they had these outdated cameras. They they didn't know how to shoot shit.
They didn't get one shot of me in that goddamn video. She's got
the little guys. I'm making sure I got the next people I killed.
They're gonna have ten thousand cameras, so you see me every five seconds.
She's got a long limbed lady, just modeling. She's like, all right,
work acrel. Yeah. So they find the house and James goes in.
He's like, I have to find my sister Heather. I'm like,
dude, she's probably not there anymore. It's been twenty years, Like she's
not there anymore. Yeah, yeah, No, except she is there,
I guess because it cuts to like who I believe is Heather, But it
looks like a bad lady. The forms, I mean, you had like
what four or five different like shaped like women, and people see the Heather
is Peter in the corner like rust and Parr made the well was it?
But I mean, was it him or was it somebody else in the creature.
You don't know if it's I think it was Peter. You think it
was in the corner. For like a second, I think that was it.
I mean that was but yeah, and then just you know, used
her time thing and then splashed him out real quick and by the wait think
we she the witch? By the way, I love all this stuff in
the house stuff from VHS, Like I don't think. I don't think Adam
Wingard directed the the VHS segment where they go into the haunted house and all
the crazy stuff's happening. But this reminds me of that. That's why I
like he's going into it. Like the house seems bigger than it is.
It's definitely bigger, goes up like five floors, Oh keeps on going,
which adds to the you know this and like the lightning flashes, we see
a sister. There's a lot of creepy stuff in this. If it was
a monster film on its own, then I think that it would have been
a lot better of a film. But the connected with the Blair Witch and
then add all these extra terrestrial things that you can do is kind of well.
Lisa's outside and she looks into the woods and we see a spaceman,
which i which you thought was the witch. We'd be calling it a twiggy
guy. But it looks like a spaceman. Yeah, I mean that's just
like is that an hill. That's not the same thing as the long limb.
No, not the the long limb was inside the house, none of
there. He's outside the house. First, she's outside and she looks in
the woods and the light catches him and he's like, ah, you like
hide behind a tree, and yeah, I watch. But I'm like,
if you're gonna put a monster in it, make it look like a tree
demon like this or like the video game has these really cool tweaky tree demon
things if you're gonna go in that direction. But this just looks like a
spaceman. It looks like an alien. Like all right, that's not as
cool, guys. I mean we see, like, you know, a
whole bunch of different Like it's to where Witch one was the Witch, Like
to my in my mind, the witch would be what they say, you
know, because if you see it, you die. So I guess we
never actually see the Witch. But I mean technically they all die at some
point, but like in my mind when James hits that one bedroom and then
there's a flash of a woman actually standing there staring at him. I think
that was Heaven. I got like a just she's got like a whole like
old like eighteen hundred's dress on like it. Really I thought that could be
the Witch. In my mind, that was like Heather and just her clothes
have like deteriorate and come back because she's just been there for years, in
there for you know what twenty years? Yeah. Yeah, So Lisa goes
in the house and she goes right into the bay and I go, don't
go in the basement. That's what happened in the first movie, would you
do? So they have seen the footage from the Blair Witch Project, right,
I am assuming that they've all seen the Blair Witch Project. Yeah,
so don't go in the basement. Yeah, because they've been talking about it
all. Well, this happens, this happens. Well, you know,
no, don't go in the basement. Yeah. But yeah, they find
Lane. He saw it's this DV camera and this is when it clicked to
me. I'm like, there's there's time loop Shenanigan. And he said he's
been there for years the way, Yeah, he looks at her and he's
like, oh my god, you look the exact same. And he looks
like he's been in there for twenty years. And what's he screaming? Like
he the Witch wants people to remember her or something like he's like working for
the Witch. Now, I think you have to do What's well, I
think it was. I think he was just kind of giving a little bit
of warning. Okay, you know, oh well, you know, the
Witch needs people to remember. And I'm like, oh, kind of like
Freddy Krueger. So this is where my beef comes from. Relate is the
whole the whole movie. It's you know, it's it's it's drizzled in to
show that Lane from the second that he was in the woods the first time
and found the footage the Blair Witch put it like a rust and Parr put
it in his head that you know, he needs to go out attract these
people and say, you know, hey, she needs more you know,
children or people to kill. So that he's just out there doing her bidding
and her dirty work to get her to get all these people to come into
the woods. And Lane, once he's in there, he realizes like,
okay, I mean it also comes with when he pulls up in the truck
and here's the and the music that he's listening to. It sounds like the
Witches grown. Yeah, so like she's in his head the whole time,
whether she definitely, whether hearing that or not. And then time stuff.
She probably left the DV tape for him, right, yeah, because there
was the yeah, the footage that, which I think is a causality loop.
But anyway, that's a time travel issue. Screw lane, That's what
I'm saying. So it turns out that the basement has another basement with a
creepy series of tunnels. Yes, and this is like the stuff in the
house is cool, but this is the most tense part of the movie.
And I would have liked more scenes like this instead of like jump scares and
shit like, because this is intense, really good. And then wandering through
the woods just yelling at each other. Yea very claustrophobic. Yeah, I'm
not super claustrophobe, but even I was like, and I was reading they
said they got the scene from Aliens when Bishop was going through the tunnel,
right, which isn't even like a horror scene, but like the concept of
that and wearily. They measured out the actress and they made the tunnel like
just like just like maybe an inch wider. Oh, so they could really
get her in there and make it look like she was crammed in there.
And they said when she was stuck, they had a guy behind her holding
under her legs and like, so she couldn't so she would try to pull
forward because she wasn't really stuck, you know, like that's all right,
that's clever family. I like that she's throwing the camera in front of her
every single time it faces the bags so good it landed just perfectly. Watched
it in like Pitch Black with my headphones on from my xbox and was watchings
so claustrophobic. I was like, oh my god. But yeah, Leen
attacks Lisa after she gets out of it, and she stabs him right killing
him, screagling oopsie doopsy, Okay, and then I have here a twiggy
alien guy. Is stupid because then the alien thing comes in the house.
He's like blah. If she can, like you know, put houses places
or things places, you would think she'd make the hallways bigger for the link.
Yeah, right, come on, which would be nice to your overly
tall, twiggy alien friends. Well, she's spent time adding an extra basement,
and so I think it's implied that they're going through the tunnel chasing her,
and I'm like, fuck you, they're not fitting in that tunnel.
These things kind of remind me of about Grave Encounters, which is a good
found footage horror movie. That one is a lot of Funcounter. There's a
plot of it. Good You ever watched some stupid hunter shows? Yes,
so it starts off it's a ghost hunter show, but it's showing how those
ghost hunting shows are bullshit and they're all fake. But then the twist is
that the place they're filming in actually is haunted. It's really really good.
I never saw the second one. Worth it. No, I haven't seen
the seconde a lot of movies. I heard the second one was actually pretty
good, not as good as the first, but I heard it was decent.
The second one might be like a meta thing, where like the first
one's a movie. I forget. I have to I have to look into
it. Grave Encounter is pretty good, but they have like creepy alien looking
dudes, and that one goes full on, like the hand the hands were
awesome, which they got from a viral video, and I wonder if they
were like involved, if they were the same people who did it. There's
that viral ghost video where it looks like hands are coming out of the wall
and then lights go out and then there's just a person made of arms.
It's really creepy. Check it out anyway. Uh, The point is the
tweaky alien guy in this is not as effective as Eddy of that because he
really comes around the corner going. So I'm like, why did they?
And I I know I knew this thing existed because if it's like a blair
Witch into YouTube, inevitably you get this video. It's like blair Witsch monster.
This was on the thumb. Now, I'm like, all right,
So I was a little I was a little prepared. I didn't see an
emotion yet. This is the first time I saw an emotion. I was
like, oh my god, I fucking got just an old witch, just
making like an old an old woman. Yeah, you know, just describe
her in the first one and then say she was like real hatless, she
had like hair and yeah, hairy and like you know, kind of like
that. I think kind of like that, maybe not quite as gaunt with
the teeth and all that, but to a certain degree that I mean,
that's like kind of our you know, McFarlane artistic license. But that's closer
than what we got here. But again, like I said, the director
swears up and down that that wasn't the witch, that was one of the
victims. Yes, because they say, well, well before that, so
I know, I keep calling them aliens and people think aliens are in this
because there is a shot where there's like lights outside of the house and it
sounds there's weird sounds like an engine. So it's like, is that a
spaceship? I get how you could interpret it that way. I understand how
people could interpret it that, but I don't think that's the case. Or
maybe it is, I don't know. I mean what else. I just
thought that was like crazy to mension lights like the witch. We know the
witches warping reality, so she could be doing something Somewhere's about the come up,
so she made it dark again. Yeah, yeah, maybe she's doing
like a spell or something. I don't know. He had some extra footage
from VHS two Alien Awesome. That was pretty awesome. That was really good.
That was one of my favorite. I felt bare for the dog at
the end. I mean, it's why the trees are cut down too,
because you know, she needs a spot for her ship. If the drune
would have gotten up higher, we would have seen crop circles. Yeah.
So yeah, he tells her like they mentioned like, oh you look at
the witch, you die. So I don't remember that being the thing in
the first one, but go for it. He's like, stand in the
corner, look at her, like that's was it explain why they stood in
the corner in the first one though, Yes, yeah, he rust in
part the kids in the corner and look away as he as he killed them
one at a time. Yeah, he got the little kids to stand in
the corner, right and and yeah, so that was that whole thing.
It had nothing. It had everything to do with rust and Parker, nothing
to do with the witch. I mean she was probably manipulating him into doing
that. But now the rule is like, just don't look at her,
don't look at her, stand in the corner. And then and then James,
you don't hear anything. And James is like, Heather, it's scary.
I'm gonna look around. It's like you fuck it, You're just you
just said it. I mean sure, the witches in her brains, in
his brain, it like so much through Like once he gets into the house,
like he's gone all together, so like he doesn't know what's left or
right. I mean, the guy even from the beginning of the film,
twenty years ago his sister went missing and he wants to go find her in
the woods. Yeah, it was annoying me that he kept telling Lisa to
close her eyes, and she was constantly like huh huh. He's like,
close your eyes, don't look. She's like, don't look at what?
But oh my god? And then see I'm looking out for myself. Will
be like, Lisa, the only way to fight the Witch's like just no,
I'm just like I'm trying to say myself, like Lisa, the only
way to stop her just look right in her face. Go go, Lisa,
go do it. Do it. I'm diving out the window, Maggie,
break through those that would see I have it here. I love that
the spaceman is camera shy because like he's back and the camera points on me.
He's like, sad, No, come on, it's from the light,
right, Like that's why that's why she makes me dark. That's why
she makes it dark through the whole thing. I think there's a thing in
the video game, but don't you use your flashlight? Yeah? Yeah,
because when I'm a demonic tree d man, I know flashlights light too.
And Lord of the Rings. Now, now didn't they not hate son in
the in the beginning? So so Lisa just saw James fall for this trap.
She just saw him fall for this who you talking to? And five
seconds later James was like, I'm sorry, Lisa. She's like James,
Lisa, I'm so suck. I love this part though, like just like
just from the from an actor's standpoint, the way the actress really plays this.
The breathing that she does sounds like her throat, like she is so
horrified that it sounds like her like throat is like vibrating and breathing. I
thought that that was fantastic. Yeah, it's the part is a little stupid,
but just the way that you know she had to act through this,
probably with ten other guys in the room stairs and prepared her for that,
you know, terrifying shower scene and Alien Covenant, right, it's the fact
that it's directed by Ridley Scott that makes it even worse. It's like,
no, you don't put schlocky shower scenes, like what the fuck is quin
Tarantino would have been feet see? Oh yeah, yeah, nothing much.
There was a lot of foot in this. I'm sure Quinn Tarantina was like,
Adam, you made the best. I've made it a little bit more
feet. You need more zooms on the feet, Adam, do you have
any alternate angles on the feet? I got one with this branch coming out
of it. Oh it's you never reguards like, yeah, you know.
Tarantino offered to edit that scene. I set them on the footage. I
never got anything. When they take their shoes off to walk through the water,
you think that they can just lose their shoes all together? They their
foot for the next home. Oh yeah, they were close up so them
taking the yeah, and the girl that just got a pedicure. Tarantino's like,
I love it. I love it. Not to get off the subject,
there's there's a movie called The Kiss. It's actually a pretty cool,
like old school horror film. Yeah, I swear like that's got to be
on Tarantino's list. There was so much feet in that movie. Well,
he's never working with me. You think he liked a quiet place one?
And two? Oh god, yeah, so many shots of people, so
many shots of feet. I never saw two. It is too good.
I haven't seen too. I didn't like one. What's the what's the better
twiggy alien? The one in this or the ones in a quiet place?
Well, the ones in the quiet place, I mean you got a better
look at them, Yeah, because I mean that was kind of the the
big payoff at the end. They're basically the monsters in this mixed with the
DEMI gorgan a little bit, a little bit. Yeah, Yeah, I
need to see too, because I like quiet Place one. But I was
just like, there's no way these three took over the world, Like,
does too elaborate on that? Like two? Yeah, I saw too.
Do they explain how these things took over? Because I'm like, they took
over like really fast, Like the military could take these things. I know
they're armored, but there are weapons that could take these fuckers Outzka is like,
yeah, it's just a high caliber like machine like you tank. Is
just the fact that they took over the world, Like the are there other
monsters? I'm not aware? But I didn't see too, so I don't
know. I was gonna confuse with the stop don't repeat whenever with tom Cruise,
Edge of Tomorrow Tomorrow. They always have to hit that house at the
end, and then like they can't go further than that house than helicopter.
And then for some reason, it's like in the woods and then it's Emily
Blunt. So yeah, wait a minute, which one is it's speaking of
time loops. We did find out at the end of this movie, when
she's running around the house, she catches how they are gone here in the
mirror and it's like, oh, it's the beginning of the movie. Got
it? Thanks? How So the the Witch had to get every single ear
cam, makes sure every single Mini SD card was fine. How I was
a media room. She had to get this watch. All the door that
was locked, James, the only door gone, don't go in. Jessica
has the red light on it. Jessica loves doing it. Jessica, please
photoshop this. Blair Witch at a computer just editing and we're all like monitor
and like energy drinks around there a pist Can I want the headset on the
alien It should be the Alien Witch, the Alien Witch from the movie.
Like, I don't know a few TVs are just shots of everyone's feet,
like all the monitors. Jessica loves when I assign her these photoshop that.
She's like, it's my favorite part of the job toting. She's like,
my Google search results aren't creepy or anything. Anyway, that was blair Witch
twenty sixteen, not the blair Witch Project twenty sixteen, or blair Witch three
or blair Witch, not the blair Witch, the wood blair Witch. It'll
be funny if at the end they found a Book of Shadows, They're like,
oh, it was here the whole time. It wasn't in the movie
called Book of Shadows, but it was here. Well, that was another
thing where the they had asked for Joe Burling here. They're like, where
was the Book of Shadows? And they're like, but there was a producer
came up with that, Like when I call it blair Witch two. So
it was blair Witch Book of Shadows. There's no Book of Shadows, but
there's don't find a better name that doesn't have the word book in it.
Then they were doing like a project, like a document Documents of Shadow.
Anyway, Yes, I will say when I was skimming through looking for pictures
of the twiggy alien guy. I came across something where apparently the missing map
from the first movie is in the house. They like show it like crumbled
up and whatnot. I don't know how true that is on the bed huh
to have the shot you see on the bed when there was stuff on the
bed. There's some someone did like a circle thing of things you missed,
and apparently the map is in there. I wonder if there's any more Easter
eggs in there. I I did a video on on one end two,
and I get a lot of people asking me to do three. And I'm
like, I don't like three. Well you're doing it here, I'm doing
it here. He talk you into it. You'll talk about like, you
know, I talk about good. I don't talk about bad. Well you
got good bad. I know I talk about while I do talk about the
I talk about the good in the bad. Okay, So maybe I don't
know. Doing this though, it did make me want to do a video
on it, because I think that there's a lot of really creative stuff in
there. Like one thing that I found out was that whenever they're turning on
or turning off the camera, like when there's that digital noise, there's a
frame from the original Blair Witch project in there that means, whoever found this
footage and is editing it is purposely putting that bit yes, or did the
Witch make copies of their film and video prints and then project it yes?
Like I really, I really would like to talk to the director a writer
and be like, okay, look what what Yeah, I won't even say,
just because there probably was interference and whatnot, but yeah, it just
always is overall. It has its moments. The tunnel seems good. Valerie
Curry getting bent in half is hilarious and awesome unexpected. I like some of
the stuff in the house at the end, the time loop, crazy visuals
at the end. Yeah, but the rest of the movie is kind of
lame. There's a lot of filler. It's a lot of filler. I
feel like it's overly produced. As I said, it doesn't feel organic like
the other one. It's not even like even though this one got butchered,
it's not even like an interesting high concept like this one. It's just like
we're doing blair Witch again. Cool, I will say, play the game
instead. The game has a really cool story where the Skuy looking for like
his brother. I think in the Woods you get a fun with the dog.
Yeah, you got like a fun dog. There's cool tree demons in
that they go to, like the Big Tree at one point. There's a
lot of cool stuff in that game. And you kind of like forgive the
more over the top stuff in a video game than you do this movie.
But yeah, check that out. Let us know. Do you think I
don't think this works as a good follow up sequel? No? Well it
really. It kind of ruined them because they were all in on revamping the
franchise. This was going to be a new trilogy. This was going to
launch the Blair Witch TV series. A Lion Skate had big plans for this.
It made money, but probably not enough to justify a bunch of anthology,
Like that's the only thing I can think of, like a bunch of
but I mean, how long can you hey, hey, dumb kids go
in the woods, get lost and die, Like how long is that gonna
be? Maybe that's why they added so many like other paranormal and alien kind
of aspects to it, to like play on each thing and each story and
you know, stuff like that have more than just it's a witch in the
woods, and yeah, if they did time travel, they would have more
stuff to go with. I don't know, I mean, yeah, I
don't know. Like the like I said, the producer that went there and
talked to Lion Skates, they didn't really give him. They just basically said
no because there was already something in the mix. And then, like I
say, they should do to be all this other stuff. They could.
So the same company owns all three now they could definitely do like a three
pack Blu ray set and put the director's cut on there. It will sell
pretty well. Yeah. The only thing that I would see would would prevent
them from from doing it the director's cut of the original instead of having disposable
teams in the beginning, it has witchcraft from Frank Sinatria. So they may
not want to pay the licensing fee. That's that's fine with that, But
as long as they edit to the way it was meant to be at right,
it exists like it exists. I have it. Yes, that cut
does exist. Does I've never sent it to anyone. You've never said it,
but somehow I got it from other people, and I have been doing
a lot of bonus videos on the Schowel recently have TV cuts and workprint cuts
of movies. I probably should like Alien three, like Alien three, I
found the work for in a cut of Alien. I've now reviewed Alien three
four times theatrical assembly on Patreon. I have the unproduced William Gibson screenplay I
did with Alien Theory, and I've gone back and I watched the workprint cut.
So there's so much Alien three. Oh god, oh heavens, the
Witch did that? Speaking of I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
You died in the beginning of my Alien three video. I'm sorry, but
you got better. That's fine. I didn't die at the beginning of the
new one, that's right, that's right. Oh wait, the new the
Alien three video of the first one that was a dream I forgot so yes.
Anyway, Frank, are there any other found footage movies that might be
out around the time that this airs that you could recommend? So depending on
when this drops. There is a quote out there on this new found footage
film that says that it is just as good as the first Blair Witch project.
Oh my god, I did which Internet Sourcer magazine did quote it that
way, but it is quoted for the film. Yes, the film is
called Human Abaci two Feast in the Forest ooh, and it is a found
footage film. It was shot in New Jersey up in the Pine Bearing Woods,
that's where the blue Hole was. And it is a it's actually a
movie about a family, a family of cannibals that are living in their own
house in the woods right off the lake and they are just picking people off
one by one searching for these other cannibals that they know are in there.
And they may or may not have a giant feast at the end of it.
That's quote. Now, who are some of the actors I might recognize
in this film project? The director is Mario Ciretto and the lead of it
is Frank Volpi. Oh my god, that's you. That is me?
Yeah, yes, oh man. This movie sounds really good. I wonder
if it was in any festivals and won any awards recently. Is it is
doing very well for itself depending on when this does come out, But it
was just recently in the New Jersey Horror Film Fest and Convention in September and
it won Best Feature Film for the Heart for the Horror Festival, So it
was it was pretty great, and I know Cecils excited. He loves Human
Abaci one. It's his favorite movie. I've seen it as a playlist of
just multiple breakdowns of Human Abauchi one. He I kept it a secret.
He's like, oh my god, Frank's going to be here. I am
so excited for Human abacci too. Say hey, I was very excited to
meet him. He said. Blair Witch let me blair Witch twenty sixteen let
me down so much, and Human Bacci two is the only thing that can
redeem it. That's what he said. They say, it's like, it's
sorry, I didn't want a fanboy on. They say it's like a testa
chainsaw massacre mixed with some found footage blair witchness in the woods. That sounds
like a great idea. Yeah yeah, the first one I think he's on
trauma at Truman now and the second one, you know, I'm not sure
exactly where it'll be out, but you know, whenever this drops, go
fine. Keeps her well updated. Thank you. So where can we find
you? You can find me on the YouTube channel Good Bad Flicks, Yes,
and also on Twitch, Twitter, Facebook, Patreon. Just look up
Good Bad Flick and you'll find me in fact f L I c K S
no fun fact. Yes, I've been watching a lot of your videos.
Yes, and I'm just like you, Well, Cecil's videos are good.
Why don't they ever show up in my feed? For some reason? I'm
not subscribed, but don't worry. I definitely was at some point. Yeah,
so I wonder what the hell happened because I'm like, no, that's
weird. I'm like, why doesn't he show up? So I just want
to show right now, right now, right now, we're all watching.
Yes, I am now subscribed, and you should all subscribe, and you
know what, you know what, you should all hit that little bell.
Hit I hit the bell, And yes, cecil channel is great. Like
I said, you really helped me out with blair Witch too. My blair
Witch two review would have just been another, oh well, this is stupid,
but you actually like gave me like the backstory and stuff, so I
actually have more to talk about there. So that was a lot of fun.
Yeah, check out Cecil's channel. Check all of that out, and
uh yeah, I gotta get going. I gotta I gotta catch a flight
over to Italy and go find my sister in those woods out there. You
better do that and avoid lup of Funa the Christmas Witch. Who that was
the witch in Italy? I looks up Italy witches. What what witch?
Oh? There's no witch. Now I don't know, is there? I
don't know. You're gonna find outot it was an alien. Now you don't
love the phone, It's going to be an alien. Don't worry. I'm
gonna bring my Italian horn and get rid of all the malochias out there.
Jesus, Okay, that is it. Likes Sharon, Subscribe, Join our
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us know what you think of the Blair Witch twenty sixteen reboot Goodbye Whoop.
You're playing like Felicia versus Bishamon And if b Shamon ends with a certain movie,
you just cut Felicia in half? Did you make sure to see Orchids
song? Here's thirty more chances? As she spins around. So you've got
the back girl's shirt on and you're wearing a Robin t shirt. Back Girl
and Robin to your Batman and Turtles is like Star Wars in the like Star
Wars is the seventies thing that ran into the eighties Turtles started in the eighties
but really grew in the nineties. Remember to like, comment, and subscribe.
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