WEBVTT

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This episode is brought to you by
Maxistentialism, a monthly zine about philosophy,

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design, humor, and social insects. Available for three dollars a month.

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You can subscribe at maxistentialism dot com. That's m A x I S T

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E N T I A l I
s M dot com. Now that is

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a cult I can get behind.
Ladies and gentlemen, hats and tickets.

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Welcome to these opening ceremonies of the
twenty fifteen Miss Scrypt. Oh that's right,

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majesty, splendor, noxious breath,
inappropriate antlers. These are all the

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hallmarks of a true Miscrypted champion,
but only one will go home with the

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coveted golden Goatman. And now your
hosts for this elegant evening of cryptid exhibition.

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I'm Dave Stecco and I'm the other
one, David Flora Dope. Just

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the other one will do. Sorry, Welcome to the first night of many.

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By many, I mean three.
That's right, as at the end

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of this broadcast, you'll have completed
the first trimester in bringing a beautiful,

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bouncing, fresh new Miscrypted into the
world. That's right. There'll be no

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turning back after that point. Yeah, tonight, we have three glorious entries,

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all delicate flowers from a shady pond
in a secret mountain, by a

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dark and shadowy tree, peed in
high an enchanted sorcer. It's that time

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of year, it is. It's
down down to business tax yep. We've

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got nine wonderful cryptids for you to
to ogle yep, and three of them

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will move on to duke it out
amongst each other. That's right. Each

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each week we will we will introduce
you to three eligible bachelorettes and you can

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only ask one apt to the big
dance, and then next week there'll be

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another three you can only ask one
of them to the begans. Then listen,

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you're gonna end up asking three girls
to the dance and it's not going

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to turn out well for you.
Yeah, and then they're all gonna fight

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over you. Oh it's great,
And then we will crown through your votes,

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Miss Cryptid fifteen, that's right.
Twenty thirteen The Golden Goatman went to

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the bat squat Switch fourteen Little Goatman
went to a little little go get her

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by the name of Jeff the Talking
Mongoose. That's right. I ever heard

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of him, I think you have
he signed some pretty lucrative advertising deal.

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Yeah, so I feel like I
feel like they're like Franklin Mints. Not

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all of them go up in value. I mean, no one hates the

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bat Squatch, but I feel like
Jeff's carving out a tiny media empire.

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It's it's like NBA draft ease man. Yeah, you just never know.

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Sometimes you go first and you don't
actually have a career. Bat Squatch.

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The Greg Odin of Oh Sports reference
well, well, well, hubba hubba,

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that's right, And you can pull
out references of your own for each

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of these. Yeah, amazing creatures. Do whatever it takes to have them

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make sense to you. Flora,
who is our mystery dates to nat Well

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tonight you are going to have the
pleasure of hearing all about the Zimiuz what,

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the catablopus and the Jackalope. Yes, America And at the end of

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the episode here go on to the
website Loli photos dot org. You'll find

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a nice little space there to cast
your vote for one of these three.

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And by casting your vote, you
have the option of being entered into the

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twenty fifteen Miscrypted prize pack. You're
casting your vote for free toys, free

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toys, candy, candy junks,
all kinds of stuff. Just ask Emerson

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when from twenty thirteen, Stephen from
twenty fourteen. But just no, before

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you ask Stephen that the shirts for
real shirts for real. Each week you

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can cast one vote and that vote
will put another entry into the drawing mix,

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so you can have a total of
four entrees. We are going to

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have three cryptids a week. You
pick your favorite, and then at the

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end of at the end of these
three weeks, you're gonna have three fine

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cryptids. Then you choose one more
time for who gets the golden goatman right,

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who signs the lucrative ad deals,
Who gets remembered while the rest get

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completely forgotten so quickly. So that's
how it works. Yep, we're gonna

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start tonight with this mew mew.
Gotta hear this? Burned it? Oh

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No, that doesn't work at all. Is Mure ready for this? Yeah?

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No, don't uh. This mu
is a creature of Romanian folklore,

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said to have humanoid legs and arms, but the body and head of a

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reptile or a snake comma or maybe
a dragon d dragon person, dragon baby,

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dragon baby looking baby going to get
you you're going to get you fortunate.

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No, dragon baby going to engage. Its abilities are the following.

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It can fly, Oh, it
can breathe fire, it can shape shift,

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It has supernatural strength, and it
has martial skills. It's a fighter.

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It sounds like this guy's got all
of the cards. Like, I

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mean, there's scept looks card dragons
are pretty awesome. Ladies hate him,

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but like, if you can fight
and shape shift and fly and fly and

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breathe fire, why we want you
win op. Yeah, but we'll see

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how you how you can defeat it
if at all later. It can't loves

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beautiful young girls. Yeah, emphasis
on the young. So there's a psychological

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price to all that prowess, and
it tries to kidnap them in order to

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marry them. Yeah, it's like
a serial monogamist, forced monogamy. Sometimes

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it'll shape shift into a flame,
which slithers into a girl's room. Then

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it turns into a man and seduces
her. What hey, baby, I

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don't feel like a flame is a
very inconspicuous way to gain entry. It's

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like, oh, I can assume
the form of a lunatic burglary. It's

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a nice icebreaker. Though, Oh
my god, I'm just kidding. How

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are you doing? It's a flame
because it breaks ice? Sure, yeah,

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okay, you've got your boots.
Why do you want to I gotta

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be honest, that was a total
accident. I didn't realize your foot was

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right there, and I thought I
was just gonna go dude, and you

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you you I impact at the wrong
time. I was not supposed to kick

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you in the ship with a boot, Dave. Dave is doing nothing but

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like hurting me. I think that's
how you're you're getting out your aggression lately.

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Yeah, it's like either something's getting
thrown in the nuts or you're kicking

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me with a boot, but not
in the nuts yet. Well, for

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you've thrown your fair share of things
at my balls too. It's just that

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in retaliation, and to be fair, you are far outweighing. Yeah,

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well I'm a little more accurate,
it would seem, which is an irony

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given the fact that you're the one
who always kicks my ass at knife throwing

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at the Renfair every year, but
not acts throwing. We'll just imagine a

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pair of balls hanging on the wood
there. I will game changer. God,

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let's talk about this guy some more. This the word comes from the

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masculine forms of the Slavic word for
snake, which I think I read is

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usually zmya or is my yah,
which which is a feminine form. And

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man, there's there's a lot of
a lot of different forms of this word.

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And I think there's a lot of
confusion on where it comes from as

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well, because a lot of people
says mew comes from the word for for

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dragon, but that's actually the in
Romanian is balar, yeah, which you

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see that that comes up like the
blar as another related entity. Yeah,

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and and I and I think I
saw the Slavic roots for it just more

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more akin to snake than than than
it is dragon. Yeah, usually a

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manifestation of greed and selfishness and folk
tales. Yeah, he's he's like a

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folk tale boogeyman. He's he's the
the the antithesis to to prince charming,

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right or or as he's known in
Romanian fat through most, which which translates

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uh actually to he's like their prince's
like handsome you. That's his name,

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fat frumosum. And that is how
you defeat one of these things, get

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yourself a fat frumos. Get a
fat frumos, Get fat frumos all over

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the place. Just cover yourself and
frumos. You have to be brave and

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selfless, like a prince Charming and
its abilities while you know, pretty mighty

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can be overcome by martial skill and
daring. So Bruce Lee could have taken

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him. Yeah, yeah, I'd
say so, nice Chuck Norris, Duh,

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these things sound very gin like.
I don't see I don't see it

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that way. I see it as
like maybe not the looks reptilian soldier class,

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I can see that, But to
me, just the way it it

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can shape shift, it's like,
you know, it's got the best of

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everything pretty much. It flies and
has strength, it can fight once once

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girls loves the young lady. Everything
to me is capital why like guys,

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I'm I'm I'm talking about girls who
are might not even be in high school.

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Everything, uh, everything to me. But the dragon look of it

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smells like gin. That's to me, and that's uh, that's gonna do

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it for our first crypto of twenty
fifteen s that's new with me. Oh

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my gosh, you just taken a
matched book to all these things. Well,

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we don't have puns at the end
of these I have to burn them

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now, don't we know? Are
you sure? Yeah? How sure?

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Real? Sure? House put a
number on it. Number. What how

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about we take a little trip from
Romania south down to Africa. I'd love

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to go to Africa, but only
if we can go to Ethiopia. Oh

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we are civilization. Yeah, let's
go to Let's go to Ethiopia, but

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not the Ethiopia you know, no
ancient Ethiopia. And let's talk about the

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catabolopus. Yeah, it sounds like
a platypus, it's not. It's the

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catabolopus. As a reason why they
still don't have steak dinners in Ethiopia to

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this day. This is an Ethiopian
creature of legend, first described by Plenty

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of the Elder, who we've heard
of before in the first century CE Man.

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We can't get away from this guy, I know, he's like the

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new Carl Young is variously described as
a beast with the body of a buffalo

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and the head of a bore.
Its back was scaly, serving as armor,

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and its head was so large it
always drooped down, which was really

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good news for everybody, because,
much like the assalisk, making eye contact

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with it would turn you to stone, yep, or kill you outright.

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Yeah, well, I guess turning
to stone will probably kill you, but

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you know what I mean. There's
also accounts that it's breath could kill you

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as well. And uh, you
know, do you know who else describe

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this thing? How some some some
jack weed know it all named Leonardo da

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Vinci, who right? Can you
believe it? Yeah? This is a

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This is a pretty popular little little
thing, getting less popular by the year,

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I'd say, but yeah. The
name is Greek for downward looking.

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So writing in naturalists Historia plenty described
at catablopas vusly Dave Stecco is Deckard Kane

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as Pliny the Elder. In Washton, Ethiopia, there is a spring,

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the Nigress, which most people have
supposed to be the source of the Nile.

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In its neighborhood, there is an
animal called the cadopla pass in other

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respects, of moderate size and inactive, with the rest of its limbs only

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with a very heavy head, which
it carries with some difficulty. It is

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always hanging down to the ground.
Otherwise it's deadly to the human race,

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as all who see its eyes expire
immediately and dr Blow was the fourth of

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00:14:45.799 --> 00:14:52.679
the prime Wait, no greatness,
it poof thank you decon. Yeah.

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Now, one thing to remember,
And I think we may have mentioned this

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in the Fountain of Youth episode.
Maybe back then Ethiopia to the Greek world,

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00:15:07.240 --> 00:15:09.200
to the to the people who were
who were writing the books at the

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time. And yeah, Ethiopia stretched
all the way across Africa, from the

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east south of Egypt, all the
way to the road to the west up

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near Morocco and south of that.
So when when it says Ethiopia in most

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accounts, or in at least Plenty's
account, it's what he means is sub

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Saharan Africa. Yeah. So in
the second century see Claudius Alienis gave a

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bit more detail to the creature in
his work called on the Nature of Animals,

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saying the following, bolivia, is
it apparent of a great number,

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enough great variety of a wild animals? And the moreover, it seems that

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the same accountry produces the animal called
the decatables. In appearance, he's about

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the size of a bull, but
it has a more grim expression, for

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his eyebrows are high and shaggy,
and the eyes beneath are not large like

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those of Oxen, but the narrower
and the blood shot. And they do

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not look straight ahead, but down
to the ground, and that is why

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it is called down looking. And
the main that begins on the crown of

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his head and resembles a horse hair
fallows over his forehead, covering his face,

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which makes it more terrifying when one
meets it. And it feeds upon

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a poisonous roots. When it glares
like a bull, it immediately shudders and

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raises its mane. And when this
has a reason erect and the lips about

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his mouth are bared, it meets
from his throat a pungent and the foul

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smelling breath, so that the whole
air overhead is infected, and in the

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animals that approach and in heel are
grievously affected, losing their voice and are

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seized with fatal convulsions. Disabeast is
the conscious of its power, and other

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animals know it too. I flee
from it as far away as they can,

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as as you mentioned before, Leonardo
of the da Vinci's mentioned it in

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a notebook, saying it is not
a very large animal, is sluggy in

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all its part, and it is
so large, he carries it with great

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difficulty, in such wise that it
is always droops towards the ground. Otherwise

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it would be a great pestre man. For anyone on whom it fixes its

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eyes dies immediately. I said this, Leonardo da Vinci. Nobody else,

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00:17:48.799 --> 00:17:56.920
and certainly not Pliny the elder me
l da Vinci put this into a code.

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00:17:56.920 --> 00:18:03.119
Find it later. Gustave Flaubert in
eighteen seventy four wrote that it was

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00:18:03.319 --> 00:18:08.559
like a black bluff blow with the
head of a hog hanging clothes from the

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00:18:08.680 --> 00:18:15.319
ground, joined to its body by
a thin neck, long and loose oven.

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00:18:15.559 --> 00:18:21.039
Indeed, intestine it who flat on
the ground, and its legs are

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00:18:21.279 --> 00:18:29.000
smothered under the huge mane of stiff
bristels that hide its faith. Gustave Flauber,

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00:18:29.920 --> 00:18:37.000
the floberriest, well, the beast
that's different. Hello, I just

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00:18:37.079 --> 00:18:41.039
want to do that for funties.
Hell if anything, my old friend go

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00:18:41.240 --> 00:18:48.799
staff Flauber. Fancy who here and
the think we bumped into each other here

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00:18:49.319 --> 00:18:53.000
the balcony of the opera, in
the middle of the second deck. No

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00:18:53.200 --> 00:19:02.279
let him, y'all golf t hells. I beg damn money for these tech

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00:19:02.359 --> 00:19:11.039
It's I'm not gonna go stop.
How you been, So let's go over

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00:19:11.119 --> 00:19:18.240
its abilities again. It's got a
death gaze yep, and or poisonous poisonous

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breath. Poisonous breath. Poisonous breath
not really an ability, but it is

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slow apparently, yeah, sluggish,
got that droopy head because it I think

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this is like lethal e or kind
of is now make a contact with me.

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It's general, I thought, I
think to be an exaggeration of just

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a will to beast. Sure,
because you know it was pretty exotic back

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then for them, and willed the
beasts do have that kind of droopy e

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or ish look to them. I
really, I would love I would love

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it if like there was just one
will to beast walking around a camp and

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the native guy are like watch this, Oh no, oh, don't look

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at it. You know that happens. So there's not an exact remedy for

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it, not not a certain way
to defeat it. But dude, you

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fight a catabolophus the exact same way
you fight a prostitute or a stripper.

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No eye contact. Oh, stay
away from the neck. But there's still

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a lot oh see, I think
that you go for the neck if if

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it doesn't have the noxious breath because
it's so slow. Wait, I'm sorry,

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what are we talking about now?
We're talking about the neck is long

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and the head's so big. It
can't move it that fast. So if

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it hasn't belched out, it's it's
that's true. But murder murder breath.

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You really double or nothing on the
breath though. I mean, you're either

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going to finish it. It's gonna
finish you if you If it has shot

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its breath, if it has burped
out death breath, then I would say

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stand back and like plug it,
plug it in the chest or belly.

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Wo just throw rocks at it and
see if it breathed on them. Oh,

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I'd solve that because you can't hit
it in the back. Keep blin

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skills. I don't know. Antagonistic, who's our third level. That's that's

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the catabolopis for you. And then
we're gonna take a jankie little Indiana Jones

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jet all the way across the Atlantic. Two little place called the United States

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u S a front range continental divide, middle of the country. Coolest place

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in the world. Whoo Woo woo, Jackalope, mother Liquor, The jackalope

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and handled species of rabbit said to
occur in the American West. As the

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name suggests, it is a cross
between a jack rabbit and an antelope,

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or a now extinct pigmy deer and
a species of killer rabbit. That's right

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now. One interesting thing that they
point out is that the if it is

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a mix between the jack rabbit and
the antelope, thus the jackalope. Interesting

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that the jack rabbit is not a
rabbit, and the hum Weirdly enough,

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the antelope from which these antlers are
thought to derive is not a true antelope.

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How's that for a fun diption fact? Yeah, so the that's rabbit

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part is a hair. Yeah,
it further proves that this is a real

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unique creature, and the antelope part
is a species of deer. Right yep.

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So. Other names for it include
anti labbit, stag bunny, and

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horny bunny, horny money, horner
bunner, lonny bunny, I got hornybutters.

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I still clear, horny bunny,
you're going out down the trail,

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you better be careful. Damn hornybuters
gonna get you. Scorpions and horner bunnies

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two things you gotta worry about.
They're rumored to be extinct or extremely rare.

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Yeah, only the only the most
careful eight year olds can track them,

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and occasional sightings still occur, with
jackalopes being brownish in color, weighing

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between three and five pounds, and
running at speeds of up to what ninety

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miles per hours? Right, they
do not mess around little little horned lightnings.

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Now here's a here's a fun fact
about the jackal take on. It

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actually might be a misdiagnosis of an
actual disease afflicted rabbit or jack rabbit.

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There is a really sad disease called
the called the shop Papaloma virus. Yeah,

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and this bad boy will infect rabbits
and actually cause horn like protrusions on

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its mouth, face, and neck
and head. It looks like it grew

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horns. Yeah, it looks like
handlers. Yeah, and it's it's really

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00:23:55.400 --> 00:23:57.400
sad when you see it too.
It's very sad. And in some cases

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it's fatal to the rabbits because or
that the hairs, I guess it keeps

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00:24:02.920 --> 00:24:06.759
them from eating or hunting, or
they'll get in the way. If it

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grows near the mouth, it could
keep them from eating. It can keep

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them from breathing. I don't know
why I said hunting. It's not like

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they're out there like cornering the rabbits. Um. So those are not true

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jackal opes. The real jackal opes. They got real antlers and real problems.

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They can apparently mimic human sounds.
And we'll use this to avoid capture.

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Y'all should leave now, now,
now, y'all should leave. Well,

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I guess there ain't no horny bunnies
around here. It's just some dude

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telling us to leave. All right, thank you, neighbor. Now,

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00:24:47.519 --> 00:24:49.680
yeah, all right, we're going. We're going, right, we're going.

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Ride meow nice um commonly seen in
Wyoming, Colorado, New Nwick,

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Nebraska, and New Mexico, Nebraska. There have also been reports of them

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in Germany, where they're called volpordinga. Yeah, the vulper tanger. Except

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where there they've got they've been upgraded
with flight abilities and murder fangs. Yeah

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they got wings. Oh, wow, they've got they're a little bit wilder

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there. They've got the head of
a rabbit, body of a squirrel um,

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wings of a duck sometimes sometimes they
duck's bill um sometimes murder fangs.

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Wow, Yeah, they really get
wild. In Germany and in Sweden they're

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called Svoder, Svodder or Skvader.
Nice, I don't I don't know how.

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00:25:42.759 --> 00:25:47.079
You guys will have to to let
me know. Yeah, closing the

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00:25:47.160 --> 00:25:51.079
category on Darth Vader puns right now, damn it. Yeah, it's too

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00:25:51.119 --> 00:25:52.440
easy. We don't play tea ball
here. You're right, yes, we

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00:25:52.559 --> 00:25:56.319
do every week. I was just
trying to get a guy on base,

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00:25:56.400 --> 00:26:00.119
dude, trying to move the runner
up myself. If forced to fight,

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they will attack viciously with their horns
and their teeth, their murder teeth.

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I found this little fun fact.
Apparently they only mate during intense lightning strikes.

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Nice. Well, that's you know, boogy boogie wigie one point twenty

285
00:26:17.440 --> 00:26:22.079
one jigawatts. Now here's the thing. They're generally thought to be a hoax.

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00:26:22.720 --> 00:26:33.000
What perpetrated by one Douglas Herrick of
early twentieth century Douglas Wyoming sermon darglasses.

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00:26:33.160 --> 00:26:37.480
The greatest trick they jack al Thope
ever pulled was convincing humanity. He

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00:26:37.599 --> 00:26:45.759
didn't exist, And what he did
was he combined a hair with deer antlers,

289
00:26:45.880 --> 00:26:52.640
using his taxidermy skills to amuse his
family and then This silly trophy was

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00:26:52.799 --> 00:26:56.359
such a hit. People saw it, they liked it that other people started

291
00:26:56.400 --> 00:27:02.119
doing it, and then they started
selling as tourists souvenir. So that's generally

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00:27:02.200 --> 00:27:07.559
held to be the what a jackalope
actually is. But you know, like

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00:27:07.720 --> 00:27:11.079
you said, if some of these
catch this virus, they're very may well

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00:27:11.160 --> 00:27:17.119
be rabbits with horns. Yea out
there could serve, as you know,

295
00:27:17.359 --> 00:27:19.559
part of the old legend. Now, I don't know how vicious they are

296
00:27:19.640 --> 00:27:23.400
towards humans or anything, and how
fast they are, but well they're they're

297
00:27:23.480 --> 00:27:30.400
having sex and lightning storm so pretty
fast. Their abilities obviously horns, teeth

298
00:27:30.000 --> 00:27:33.000
and speed to defeat them, what
do you think? What would you do,

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00:27:33.119 --> 00:27:37.799
Dave? What would you do to
one of these things, to a

300
00:27:37.880 --> 00:27:40.519
jackalope? To a jack lope?
Too? Do we have to defeat them?

301
00:27:40.880 --> 00:27:44.920
Well, I'm just trying to give
an antidote to the problem. Is

302
00:27:44.960 --> 00:27:48.400
it a problem if we have to
kill everything flora? If they're gonna try

303
00:27:48.440 --> 00:27:52.839
and kill you, you schmuck,
what are you going to do to defend

304
00:27:52.920 --> 00:27:56.400
yourself? It's a killer bunny.
Hell. In Germany they fly at your

305
00:27:56.440 --> 00:27:59.920
face. Yeah, but in Germany
they got murder things in the US.

306
00:28:00.039 --> 00:28:03.920
They don't know they do they do? Yeah, that's what I read all

307
00:28:04.039 --> 00:28:07.079
right, that they had. They
were like, they're like the Monty python.

308
00:28:07.279 --> 00:28:11.400
I damn it, I was going
to clean the Holy Anger Gain of

309
00:28:11.440 --> 00:28:15.440
Antioch. So I guess that's out. That's out. How do I How

310
00:28:15.480 --> 00:28:19.599
do I defend? Uh? Will
I'll throw a metal egg at its balls.

311
00:28:21.160 --> 00:28:23.039
I'm good at that. I well, that's what I'll go with.

312
00:28:23.319 --> 00:28:26.279
I don't have any way of stopping. I mean, I grew up in

313
00:28:26.319 --> 00:28:30.400
Colorado. You'd think I would have
some sort of mechanism for for jackalope defense,

314
00:28:30.440 --> 00:28:36.240
but I don't. I think you
pour some tar out, oh slow

315
00:28:36.319 --> 00:28:38.119
them down. You didn't get them
stuck in there and shoot those glue traps,

316
00:28:38.359 --> 00:28:41.880
Yeah, something like that. Maybe
I don't know. Yeah, you

317
00:28:41.960 --> 00:28:48.279
know, that's that's all theoretical.
They not. All these creatures have antidotes,

318
00:28:48.839 --> 00:28:52.880
you guys. The jackalope has no
weakness the jack lope antidote, Nope,

319
00:28:53.279 --> 00:28:59.960
but that'll do it on the jacalais. So those are those are your

320
00:29:00.200 --> 00:29:04.119
three elegant ladies this evening. Take
your time, think it over, maybe

321
00:29:04.240 --> 00:29:07.480
go back to the beginning and listen
to our blathering horse shall over again.

322
00:29:07.480 --> 00:29:11.960
That's right. Once again. You've
got zmu, catabolopus and jackalope. Yeah,

323
00:29:12.039 --> 00:29:17.119
but before you have those, you
gotta deal with me R. J.

324
00:29:17.400 --> 00:29:23.240
Punnington, the third not of the
west Chesterfield Punnington. Indeed, because

325
00:29:23.279 --> 00:29:27.240
if it was the new Brunswick Punnington's
yeah, I would have bought you a

326
00:29:27.519 --> 00:29:33.839
Scotch puns Flora. You go.
Well, obviously, when you're dealing with

327
00:29:34.680 --> 00:29:41.400
a large contingent of wild rabbits with
antlers why or wild hairs, I guess

328
00:29:41.799 --> 00:29:47.119
they are going to eventually become a
community within themselves. Right, They're gonna

329
00:29:47.160 --> 00:29:52.000
have laws, they're gonna have some
kind of hierarchy, and they're gonna have

330
00:29:52.079 --> 00:29:57.599
religion, and so they have to
elect a jacopope. Nice. You know,

331
00:29:57.720 --> 00:30:03.839
I've heard hell that in some of
the tropical jungles of South America there's

332
00:30:03.880 --> 00:30:11.519
a creature with just outrageous speed and
the fangs of a jaguar and also deer

333
00:30:11.599 --> 00:30:18.160
antlers and the body and legs of
a giant tarantula. It's a jackal Nope,

334
00:30:18.839 --> 00:30:22.839
nope, nope, nope, nope, No, all right, I've

335
00:30:25.200 --> 00:30:30.960
I've got a great book for you. You might have even read it if

336
00:30:32.440 --> 00:30:37.960
if you like early twentieth century novels, if you like early twentieth century British

337
00:30:37.000 --> 00:30:44.759
literature. It's a novel about a
young woman in the repressed culture of Edwardian

338
00:30:44.839 --> 00:30:52.759
era England who is constantly worried about
getting taken away and married to a horrible

339
00:30:52.799 --> 00:30:59.240
beast what it's called a room with
his mew nice. I like that?

340
00:31:00.319 --> 00:31:08.200
Do you know uh that in um, ancient Ethiopia, Um, they're stretched

341
00:31:08.200 --> 00:31:12.039
across the entire contents, right.
Not only was their constant warfare, there

342
00:31:12.160 --> 00:31:19.960
was enormous castles with walls and UH
siege weapons, and the only way uh

343
00:31:21.119 --> 00:31:27.279
and sometimes to to finally break the
siege was to hurl mythical creatures with with

344
00:31:27.559 --> 00:31:33.680
poisonous breath and and death eyes over
the wall. Even for that, you'd

345
00:31:33.720 --> 00:31:45.519
need a very specialized UH siege engine
called a Katabla pult. Oh. That

346
00:31:45.640 --> 00:31:48.759
one, That one's at least I'm
gonna call that one at least a triple

347
00:31:51.000 --> 00:31:52.759
And if and if anybody bobbles the
ball, you got a home run with

348
00:31:52.799 --> 00:31:59.720
that who in field, Homer,
There you go. Dam's puns and dams.

349
00:32:00.000 --> 00:32:10.279
Week ones of the twenty fifteen Missus
scripted contest. Yep uh go vote

350
00:32:10.599 --> 00:32:16.119
yep vote enjoy uh write us an
email, Like us on Facebook, Twitter,

351
00:32:16.240 --> 00:32:22.599
US, glitter Us, fritter us. We're gonna get fried and oil.

352
00:32:22.599 --> 00:32:25.680
But most importantly, thank you for
listening. You are magnificent. Yeah,

353
00:32:25.720 --> 00:32:31.200
I hope you're hope you're having fun
so far with miscripted and brown looking

354
00:32:31.319 --> 00:32:37.799
forward to the next couple. Alright, have fun, you trolla lolls.

355
00:32:39.240 --> 00:32:57.200
I've been David Flora. I'm Dave
Stecko. I'm Dave Stecco. On time,

356
00:32:57.400 --> 00:33:02.319
David Floor, I go. Everything
good. David Stucco is your Adobe?

357
00:33:04.000 --> 00:33:07.039
Now? Come on, Flora,
No you coo bord. I'm David

358
00:33:07.319 --> 00:33:10.759
Flora. Come on, Flora.
We're trying to we're trying to have fun.

359
00:33:10.839 --> 00:33:17.240
You have fun, You have fun. Dave Stacco. I'm David Flora.

360
00:33:19.119 --> 00:33:25.119
I'm I'm tired of it into my
balls and I'm tired of it.

361
00:33:27.119 --> 00:33:36.200
You damn David Stacco. No,
go find things that macOS. Go all

362
00:33:36.279 --> 00:33:42.839
right, let's do this for you. I'm Dave Stacco. Even Flora,

363
00:33:43.359 --> 00:33:50.319
I can't stop totching my nipples.
Flora, please, but can be just

364
00:33:50.519 --> 00:34:06.279
for one No nipples? All right? Realist time I'm yeah, that was

365
00:34:06.279 --> 00:34:15.440
a good one. I'm Dave Stecco, David Flora. Where did my pants

366
00:34:15.599 --> 00:34:23.159
go? Help me find them?
But I don't I don't know, I

367
00:34:23.239 --> 00:34:30.239
don't know exactly exactly. You all
right,