WEBVTT

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Good morning that replex. Welcome into
fun and and other stuff. We've got

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a fun one for you today.
Here on the Downbeat, we have big

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breaking news throughout the show. The
Academy Awards nominees coming down. I'll love

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JJ at nine o'clock breaking that down
for us eight thirty ding This Morning News

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at eight to brand new Downbeat segment, Neighborhood Watch can try to bring these

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neighborhoods together first before we can change
the world. You ought the next door

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app, don't you? Yeah,
just about boots on the ground report or

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reports from the messy arians last night
or yesterday to sports some news. Many

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laughs, Oh my god, the
amount of laughs? How many laughs?

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So many? In fact, a
million starting now, a million and six.

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Let's just hit the million first and
then we'll worry about sprinkling in the

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sixth, you know what. Let's
focus on six and then we'll sweat the

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million. Yeah, there's one,
he's got one in there. How many

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more does he have? List?
I'm leading one zero zero. Oh no,

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your phone case is gonna have to
be a foot No, no,

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we're not laughing about that one.
A terrible way. Imagine imagine if someone

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was just listening in like every word
you said, they I don't know,

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like a knob. They like turn
it like, oh this is good,

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this is bad? How your whole
life was dependent. There's just that that's

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happening. Well, there's a radio
no I suppose, yeah, determines listen

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or no. But every time we
crack our mic on someone news listening.

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Okay, And that's where i'd like
to tell you. Hello, I'm Kevin.

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Hey, I'm Shale, I'm the
Dinger La. I'm sorry. Did

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that guy say that his name was
Shale? Yeah? And then the other

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guy said his name is Dinger?
And then knop switch why is the other

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guy's name normal? And then just
Kevin, Kevin, Mike and Dannee.

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Welcome. If you are listening to
us for the very first time, Good

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morning, six oh two am,
Tuesday, January twenty third, and welcome.

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I don't know if it's by accident
or what if you're looking for rock

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or what you expected here right here, but thank you for listening. I

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bet you have a good time if
you just stick with us, give us

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a shot. It's a bit of
an acquired taste. Who's looking for rock?

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We're told if you're looking for rock
talk, go to science channels,

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and really we're still sitting at one, still holding steady a low one.

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You know what's kind of weird.
As we killed rock, we didn't,

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I don't know. Other stations picked
it up and they've been doing well.

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And we have the dinger who knows. I don't know as much as anybody

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about rock and music and people in
bands. Watch, let me demonstrate Kevin

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name a random eighties band, Motley
Krue. I mean, what do you

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want to know? Who's in it? Tommy Lee, Vince Neil and Nikki

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six and mc mars. You know
what, I think? I knew that

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one, A harder one. Okay, Morris Day in the time. What

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we'll save him by saying I wouldn't
say? That's Ronald Richie. What are

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you doing? He doesn't know he
was born in like two thousand about.

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That's like the worst era of rock. Scorpions. Scorpions, Okay, Herman

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Rarebail on drums, Francis Bucholts on
bass. You had Rudolph Schinker on guitar,

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Mattias Jobs on other guitar, and
Class Minor on lead vocals. It's

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it's easy. Alex Life's and Neil
Pert, and it really is quite the

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parlor trick. How about that rock
fans, I might be the cockroach that

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survives this apocalypse. Yeah exactly.
Yeah, when rock returns, you're listening

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to the freak in the mornings,
come and get it. Someone might think

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that's a good idea to stop shot, stop doing good, shut off about

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that. My whole bit is I
can name the members of the bands.

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They have some big meeting or at
a table, they're like, all right,

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well Mike is gone. Kevin,
I don't know gone. You can

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name all these weird guitarists and drummers. I mean it's something. He's still

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got a year on his contract.
We got to use him somehow. Let's

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do it. Keep him. Here's
a keeper. They slide you in a

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different pile than me and Kevin with
our head shots on it. My big

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office table. You guys get desk
jobs. Why are we running the promotions

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department now? Oh lordie, just
kidding. Everything is fine, Oh oh

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oh what relax and thirty minutes.
We need to have a talk. We

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need to really what's the thing that
Jada has pinket or red table talk?

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What you call a blue pill talk? What they call it your red bag.

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She sits around her table and then
they talk about serious subjects like Will's

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vomitous orgasms. JJ, what's it
called. I'm sorry, I'm red table

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talk, red table talk. We're
gonna have a red table talk at six

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thirty five. Beau what local weather
man called messy something last night on the

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news and no one has picked it
up and ran with it. But I

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saw it and I pulled it,
and you think it's questionable. I think

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we just need to have a talk
about as a guy, oh does take

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part in locker room talk, you
know, on the golf course, you

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know, but that's golf course talk. Kevin boobs and ass hot hot hot

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something. You might hear me.
He just stripped his drive on seven ye

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struts off the tee, just talking
boobs and ass and there's that. And

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the messy thing was kind of nuts
apparently of stuff on that later, but

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you guys are gonna love it.
Six thirty five, get ready. I

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would like to do a new intro. Juja, I An'm mourning to this.

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Can we do the the BB intro
that we just added earlier in the

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week. It's about breakfast and another
thing. It's funny that they who appropriated

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that word to mean, like,
what was boner already referring to your wien?

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And and they appropriated it to mean
a mistake or was it a mistake?

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And then the wien appropriated it to
mean a firm wien. I bout

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a mistakest. Bill Buckner had one
of the biggest boners of all time.

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That was nineteen eighty six. Both
terms existed prior to that. Yes,

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what's called the boner patrol? Then? And see, I feel like boner

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as a mistake was is of old
timey? I think so it is?

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But then what are you what are
you saying that the term boner for having

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a bone was only what in the
fifties or something here does on dictionary dot

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com if you'd like to see a
person or thing that, oh my god,

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a person or thing that bones too
slang vulgar, an erection of the

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penis. Yea, he made himself
laugh? Does that count? Not count?

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We're not counting. We're not counting. But going to Miriam Webster and

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reading the definition of a bonus a
foolish and obvious blunder, a stupid mistake

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have dates. I see how those
tie in yeah. Yeah, that's the

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second definition of it though, so
yeah, I don't know all right?

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Oh yeah nineteen ten, nineteen ten? What the the which one origin of

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the mark? There's said too many
times? Listen the intro for it now,

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heaven I hear wrong? Boy morning
show? Or what pretty wacky?

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What the hell's happened? Ah?
God, Danny? Oh you want me

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to to tell you about mine?
It surely isn't about me. But okay,

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So, Mikey, I told you
yesterday the very brief story about how

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on Sunday morning, I went to
pick up Malcolm, my almost three year

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old son. He was at his
mom's and you know, we're shooting the

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breeze and he's running around. He's
got this toy that he got for Christmas.

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It's called Doodoo Kangaroo and it's a
plastic kangaroo that you feed him these

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little plastic donuts and he craps into
a toilet fun for the whole family,

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and he was playing with that.
I'm talking to his mom and he walks

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around and says, I ate a
donut? Like what? He goes,

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Yeah, I had I ate a
donut like you ate a donut. It's

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like, what for breakfast. He
goes, no, I ate a donut,

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and he was like pointing to his
mouth, and me and his mom

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were but like, whoa, you
ate one of those little platt And we're

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like, open your mouth. And
then he starts kind of freaking out because

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he sees us freaking out. Yeah, and we realize that he just claimed

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to have swallowed one of the little
plastic donuts that came with the toy bad

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Yeah. So we're looking around for
the rest of the doughnuts and we count

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them all and they're supposed to be
eighteen of them. There were seventeen.

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So immediately it is on the phone
with parents, it is text to my

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doctor, it is web md,
it is Google, all of it to

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figure out what do you do.
We're talking about the size of a dime.

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Yeah, it's a little bit larger
than a dime, a little bit

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smaller than a penny, so right
in that size range. And it's very

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flat plastic piece of plastic with an
adhesive sticker on it that makes it look

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like a doughnut. All right,
So we're all told basically the same thing.

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See how he responds, See how
he reacts. Okay, Like if

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he's just acting like he's in pa
and his stomach or if he won't eat

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or his his mouel movements stop.
Yeah, that's concerning because it's a disc,

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and you know, it's not like
a little beebie or something. I

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mean, it's of significant size for
a little body like his. So our

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concern is that thing's going to get
into one of the the openings to his

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low his small intestine, or it
gets lodged in his intestine and creates some

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kind of blockage. So everything's fine. That day, he does his normal

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evacuation of his facilities like normal,
but that would have meant that the food

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was already down there. So we
get through the whole day. He doesn't

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complain of any pain, and then
yesterday afternoon he started saying, tummy ache.

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I have a tummy ache, and
we're like, oh my god.

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So every time, yes, I'm
just freaking out as a matter of fact,

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to the point where yesterday I feel
like I was disassu disassociated with the

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show yesterday morning because it was on
my mind, and every time my phone

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would would bleep up and it was
his mom. I'm like freaking out.

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So finally I have him all day
Yesterday and his mom picks him up yesterday

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evening and I get a text from
her. I don't know, it's probably

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during the MAVs game, and it's
a picture. I can't really tell what

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it is, but apparently she took
a photo of the contents of his evening

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diaper and the caption just said Hallelujah, and inside the diaper with his leavings

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right there for all to see,
the little plastic donut. The little donut

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made. It took the journey of
a lifetime. And I don't know how

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many parents out there. I'm sure
there's a lot of parents that listen to

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us. I don't know how many
of them this has happened to. But

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dude, when I got that text, I jumped off the couch and fisted

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up in the dude, cause you
have. The last thing you want is

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you know your kid can't go to
the bathroom. He's doubled over in pain.

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That's all I'm thinking of is just
the worst case scenario of having to

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go to the emergency room. They're
gonna have to stick a scope into his

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intestines, or have to go in
there and get this thing or put him

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on something, you know, X
ray him. I mean keeping him still

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for an X ray. They have
to knock him out. Yeah, it's

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just not happening with that little wildcat. So, oh my god, dude,

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it was elation. It made my
day. That's great. So it

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was Sunday that he ate it.
Yeah, yeah, and then yesterday Monday

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evening, pretty quick four hours normal
cycle. Isn't that a normal Yeah?

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Yeah, usually eighteen to twenty four
for the food you eat to turn into

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manure manure, yuck. And he
had no problem passing it. He yeah,

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elicited, no signs of pain or
discomfort or anything. Kids are man.

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I was just shopping for Christmas and
birthdays for my nieces. We're all

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under the age of six, and
it's like, you can't you hardly find

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anything that doesn't have small pieces with
it when it comes to toy, so

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I'm always trying to not buy anything
like that for them. Some of them

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choke on it, but also it
will swallow it. Yeah, it says,

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I'm looking at Dodoo Kangaroo dot com. What did you find that on

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Amazon? Okay, there's Wow,
Welcome and Danny in the bathroom together,

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right, and he's just happy.
Kangaroo sitting on a toilet and two happy

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kids just snacking on snacking on some
plastic donuts. But it says ages three

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plus and he's coming up on these
three in March. Three in March.

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That's it. It does a choking
hazard of the thing. But I imagine

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the biggest concern is the choking upon
initial consumption totally and then obviously hopefully that

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thing goes through. So do we
give that thing a good twice over and

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get it back in a donut rotation
with its seventeen friends. I think Doodoo

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Kangaroo lives at the top of the
closet now along with his seventeen donuts,

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all donuts. Well, we're not
going to reuse the eighteenth donut that was

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exit in there. Just mix it
in there. No, no, no,

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I'll show you the picture and you
tell me if you want your kid

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playing with this thing. Oh after
a goodh a wasshing. So he's sitting

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there with a stupid kangaroo and a
toilet, no donuts to feed it,

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and this toy sucks, right,
Doodoo Kangaroo. How because the world is

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insane. The world started going insane, I would say in the mid to

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late nineties and we're just out of
you can't turn back anymore. Yeah,

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yeah, the horses out of the
barn and we can't go back to normal,

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normal humor where we're just normal human
beings. It is just because doodoo

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rhymes with kangaroo that they made the
problem anyway, Right, what else rhymes

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with do doo? Right? I
mean there's so many like gag gifts.

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There's a gag gifts for lou sitting
on the pot and you can you can

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have a putt and green time out. What what toddler? What Toddler's face

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wouldn't just light up on Christmas Morning
at the sight of the brand new popular

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toy Doodoo Vita Blue. He's my
favorite Oakland A's picture from the seventies.

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Seventies do do Vita Blue? Maybe
was fingers? Oh we'd better with rolly

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fingers. You have a cool mustache. Maybe, but it does. It

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doesn't wrong, I know exactly.
There's no green light, Kevin, It's

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all right, red light on,
and then they bring me another slice of

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pizza I don't want. Well,
that's good, I'm lated. You can

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tell you're a little concerned. I
completely understand, especially when you get a

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text, you know, right before
Dingo's Morning news, and it's his mom

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saying, Malcolm's complaining of a tummy. No, I'm gonna have to bounce

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out of here and run to my
car race to Baylor. You know,

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but everything was fine. Why don't
you bring Dodo Kangaroo here. We can

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play with it because Malcolm can't play
with it anymore. Bring the eighteen donuts

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in and we'll see if Kevin seventeen. We'll see if Kevin can find the

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magical eighteenth down that can bring them
all. Bring them all eight o'clock,

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will blindfold you, and you and
you taste each one. Ah, it's

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like pooh humor. I don't either, but you're taking part in this.

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00:17:52.319 --> 00:17:55.680
This is funny. This is a
serious medical matter. Yeah, keV,

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Yeah, keV. Who's keV birthday? I am unbelievable. So last night

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I got home from from dinner.
I went to a dinner because he said,

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was my birthday? What'd you have
for dinner? Plastic donuts? Okay,

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00:18:14.279 --> 00:18:15.119
I don't know how you want.
I don't. There's nothing really to

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00:18:15.160 --> 00:18:18.680
handle. It was this idiot's birthday
yesterday. Yeah, he went to a

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birthday dinner last night. Didn't tell
anyone. I didn't know it was his

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birthday till the show ended. And
don't do that again. I don't know

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how to handle that. I'm not
gonna make an announcement to tell everyone it's

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my birthday. Well, were we
just supposed to know? We're not know.

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I don't know your birthday. I
know it's somewhere in March. No,

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that's mine. I know it's in
I know you're just somewhere in May.

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No, that is it May.
Yeah, you and the buttload of

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00:18:48.599 --> 00:18:52.200
other people who have birthdays somewhere between
May twentieth and May thirtieth. Yeah,

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00:18:52.240 --> 00:18:57.160
good god, many cray trayon machine
or pretty much back again, Kavanaugh,

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00:18:57.599 --> 00:19:12.799
all these people May birthday, Yeah
power birthday May rhymes with gays. What

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00:19:12.839 --> 00:19:18.319
happened to you birthday? Boy?
We're good at dinner? What type of

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food? Chinese food? So is
your birthday? You get to fo some

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dim sum? Remember he wanted dim
some he wanted birthday dim Did they put

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one little candle in your dim sum? Terrible service? Stick it in your

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your soup. I'm not I'm not
going to annihilate the place that had that

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gave me a very disappointing experience.
Last night, did they sing Happy Birthday

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00:19:37.680 --> 00:19:42.400
and Chinese? And if they did, I would have recorded it. What

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would that sound like? Okay,
Mikey, go ahead, I don't.

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00:19:45.559 --> 00:19:48.079
We don't have time. We don't
have time. Most of our listeners don't

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00:19:48.119 --> 00:19:51.839
seak Chinese. So I'm trying to
relate to the audience. I mean,

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you guys have all done this,
the the fake birthday like saying it's your

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00:19:55.680 --> 00:19:59.640
birthday when it's not right. Never
actually I've never done that. No,

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you say someone else's birthday? Yeah, yeah, Yeah, I forgot who

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00:20:03.920 --> 00:20:07.279
he did it for. I know. I'm back in our going to ox

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00:20:07.359 --> 00:20:11.200
Nard days and Ben's getting It's like
a yearly tradition. They'd go into this

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00:20:11.359 --> 00:20:15.839
sushi place and dude, it was
nuts. They'd turn out the lights.

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00:20:17.519 --> 00:20:22.200
It's like he turned into a disco
party in there for thirty seconds. It's

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00:20:22.240 --> 00:20:26.480
a great gag. Yeah, I
think, I think. I yeah.

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00:20:26.519 --> 00:20:33.039
On spring training trips or Cowboys training
camp trips at a Mexican restaurant back when

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00:20:33.039 --> 00:20:37.440
the Cowboys were in San Antonio,
we went to this Mexican place and went

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00:20:37.519 --> 00:20:41.480
up to the matre d and let
him know that it was his birthday,

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00:20:41.640 --> 00:20:45.240
and we wanted to make sure that
yes, it was like eighty sixth birthday,

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00:20:45.279 --> 00:20:49.599
and he was probably like sixty maybe
younger than that at the time.

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And they come out and they put
the sombrero on him, and they're dancing

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around and they give him the little
flawn with the candle in it, and

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he doesn't like flawn. In the
picture that we have of him, just

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00:21:00.680 --> 00:21:08.720
sitting there going thank you and egoo, scrasia anyway, Kevin, sorry to

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00:21:19.519 --> 00:21:23.599
it's so loud there. It's one
of us say it was one of our

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00:21:23.640 --> 00:21:29.599
birthdays at the sushi place in Oux
Nerd Point. That doesn't matter. I

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get home and I get text means
on my phone. It is a fraud

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00:21:33.279 --> 00:21:38.799
department. Oh uh oh and see
okay, birthday fraud. That doesn't look

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00:21:38.839 --> 00:21:47.440
like something that I have purchased here. I don't have cash App, but

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00:21:48.599 --> 00:21:52.279
reply yes or no if you use
the debit card ending in blankety blank blank

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00:21:52.319 --> 00:21:59.079
blank cash app K E L L
I C I nineteen dollars, so I

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00:21:59.119 --> 00:22:00.680
you know know, and they tell
you the number of the call, so

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00:22:00.720 --> 00:22:07.680
I call the number quickly go to
my account. My account has cash App

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00:22:07.720 --> 00:22:14.759
purchases and there's about seven of them. Should this happened to you all probably

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00:22:14.880 --> 00:22:19.359
before, right, Okay, one, two, three, four, five,

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00:22:22.119 --> 00:22:27.880
six, seven cash app purchases.
One is sixteen dollars, one is

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00:22:27.920 --> 00:22:32.759
thirteen, one is twelve, one
is eleven, one is ten, one

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00:22:32.839 --> 00:22:34.680
is eighty cents, and one is
seventy five cents. But it's linked to

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00:22:34.759 --> 00:22:41.240
your debit account. Yes, oh
okay, So someone got in my information

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00:22:41.559 --> 00:22:45.519
started a cash out, yeah,
and aimed low and started doing a bunch

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00:22:45.519 --> 00:22:48.880
of tiny ones. Now I've got
a blocker on mine, like if there's

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00:22:48.920 --> 00:22:55.119
anything any purchase over one thousand dollars
and I would get a hit back.

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So I called and talked to the
LAMB. Okay, so good, shut

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00:22:59.559 --> 00:23:03.799
off my car. Great. Now
what she's like, Okay, well just

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00:23:03.839 --> 00:23:07.160
call your bank. Well, my
bank's not open at eight o'clock last night,

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you know. So I'm debit card
list right now. I don't know

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00:23:11.839 --> 00:23:17.640
he borrow some money, I got
cash. I'm good much enough? Yeah,

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00:23:18.559 --> 00:23:22.720
well for what? Enough? For
what? It depends? I have

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00:23:22.880 --> 00:23:25.119
enough, but I don't have it
for what do you have enough for?

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A dim sum do over? Jesus
daytime, dim sum duover. Definitely gonna

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00:23:30.039 --> 00:23:36.440
get it be, I know,
fine, make it open I mean,

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00:23:36.480 --> 00:23:37.039
you want to make it up to
me, do you take me off for

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00:23:37.079 --> 00:23:42.559
some dim sum for lunch one day? I would love nothing more than to

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00:23:42.599 --> 00:23:48.920
take Kevo out for some dim sum
for lunch one day. So I have

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00:23:49.000 --> 00:23:53.200
to now call my bank today and
be like, okay, so, uh

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00:23:53.279 --> 00:23:56.279
what what do I do now?
And they're gonna be like, we're gonna

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00:23:56.319 --> 00:24:00.480
send you a new card, and
they're gonna the problem cover the chart right

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00:24:00.640 --> 00:24:06.079
now that I've gott a document I've
put together and it's all everything define accounts,

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00:24:06.759 --> 00:24:11.799
and you gotta go home and redo
it. And our financial system is

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00:24:11.920 --> 00:24:15.920
too flimsy. It's too flimsy.
We need to go back to a cash

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00:24:15.920 --> 00:24:18.319
world. Okay, Kevin. Well, if you're gonna get hacked and people

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00:24:18.319 --> 00:24:22.160
are gonna start taking your money,
they gotta do it the good old fashioned

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00:24:22.160 --> 00:24:26.880
way, break in and murder your
family, or pickpocket or pickpocket. So

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00:24:26.000 --> 00:24:29.799
I was thinking, but yes,
yours is a little darker. Yes it

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00:24:29.960 --> 00:24:33.279
was away. Hey, if I
then you hire Rady Johnson to sit by

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00:24:33.279 --> 00:24:38.960
your bed and throw baseballs at him
if they walk in, He could have

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00:24:38.960 --> 00:24:42.160
said blue, I could have It
would have been a good callback. But

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00:24:42.240 --> 00:24:47.079
that was before my time. You
guys do too many references of people I've

299
00:24:47.119 --> 00:24:52.799
never heard of of. Vita Blue. The demo goes to fifty four.

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00:24:52.440 --> 00:24:56.839
Yeah, all right, we're going
high end on it. Yeah. So

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00:24:56.880 --> 00:24:59.839
you have a couple hundred buck loose
cash in your pocket? Uh huh if

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00:24:59.839 --> 00:25:03.680
I I speaking of pickpockets. If
I successfully pickpocket that money off of you

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00:25:03.759 --> 00:25:07.319
and show it to you, can
I keep it? Yes? Thank you.

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00:25:07.039 --> 00:25:11.079
I'll know when you're sniffing around my
ass. You wan't know anything.

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00:25:11.319 --> 00:25:18.440
Does a successful bucket? Does a
successful pickpocketing event? Does the victim ever

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00:25:18.559 --> 00:25:22.160
know it's happening? Oh, because
I'm saying you just walk over there and

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00:25:22.200 --> 00:25:25.680
like hit him with a brick and
steal his wallet. Oh yeah, I

308
00:25:25.680 --> 00:25:27.599
did that yesterday. It was a
debit card, started a cash hap account.

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00:25:29.960 --> 00:25:33.160
Now I'm going for the cash.
Why only thirteen dollars purchases testing it?

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00:25:33.920 --> 00:25:38.920
Today's the day for the big hitter. Seventy five cents, eighty cents

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00:25:40.160 --> 00:25:44.720
a dollar, ten, eleven,
twelve, and then sixteen Today, I'm

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00:25:44.720 --> 00:25:48.039
getting a whole palette of doodoo kangaroos. You know what it took. The

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00:25:48.079 --> 00:25:52.920
one that they texted me about in
the fraud was nineteen dollars, which is

314
00:25:52.960 --> 00:25:56.079
I bet what Doo Dooo Kangaroo cost? How much is Doo Doo Kangaroo?

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00:25:56.119 --> 00:25:57.720
Do you know? I don't know. You got him up. I'm was

316
00:25:57.799 --> 00:26:03.640
curious. I bet Doo Doo Kangaroo
is probably around twenty one nine. Yes,

317
00:26:03.839 --> 00:26:07.720
toys for kids are expensive too,
yea god uh do Doo Kangaroo game?

318
00:26:07.799 --> 00:26:12.680
Feed him until he's got to go
grab the donuts and dodge the doo

319
00:26:12.680 --> 00:26:18.359
doos. Collect the most donuts to
win. So that's how they make the

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00:26:18.400 --> 00:26:22.680
game of it. Uh huh.
Regularly priced nineteen ninety nine. Okay,

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00:26:23.000 --> 00:26:27.119
Amazon has a discount twenty nine percent
off. Oh we're at fourteen dollars and

322
00:26:27.200 --> 00:26:30.759
nineteen cents right now, Amazon Prime
free shipping. We can have this bad

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00:26:30.799 --> 00:26:37.000
boy in studio tomorrow. A couple
of text messages in the first segments.

324
00:26:37.720 --> 00:26:40.720
This is the first, second,
two and four. This guy says,

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00:26:40.799 --> 00:26:42.680
Uh, fellas, I'm in line
at Chick fil A at the window,

326
00:26:42.720 --> 00:26:48.200
and you guys keep yelling boner please. My lord's chicken is blushing, blushing,

327
00:26:48.079 --> 00:26:52.359
my lord's chicken and uh, that's
what I call it. Oh,

328
00:26:52.519 --> 00:27:00.000
yes, Vin job Malcolm and shout
out to Kate from down the street,

329
00:27:00.039 --> 00:27:06.680
good listener. It's his birthday today
and he told me I have birthday yesterday,

330
00:27:06.759 --> 00:27:11.200
and I wanted to repay that to
him because I acknowledge when people have

331
00:27:11.279 --> 00:27:15.079
birthdays, just not yourself. And
we will prove that at six forty five.

332
00:27:15.400 --> 00:27:19.039
Come out next. What did Channel
eight weatherman Pete delk Is call messy

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00:27:19.240 --> 00:27:23.000
last night on the ten o'clock news
Next to ninety seven won the Freak