Whoa, what's up, beautiful people. It is your baby mama, favorite
baby Mama, Stormy Pe And this is another episode of Chocolate Chip and Sive
the modern day female perspective during my son back at it again. And honestly,
y'all, we are not back at it again because we are alive at
the se Content House in Atlanta. Y'all make some noise, Stormy makes some
noise. I just want to thank each and everyone y'all for coming out to
rock with me tonight. I ain't gonna lie. I was a little bit
nervous, but your girl is already say eighteen something night away. Okay.
Now, before we get started, I do have to say, y'all know
I take care of my grandma. She just turned ninety and may my old
lady. And because she is ninety, the fact that I don't have a
nine to five but I always have money, she think I'll be fucking for
money. So um, what I like to do you is at every one
of my events, I like to on account of three y'all all say hi
Anna, just so she no I'm not hoeing, okay, all right,
So on account of three one two three, Hi, thank you. Thanks
see see support black women. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Um So, before we getting started, I want to thank the se Content
House and some Maya for sponsoring this event. And I also want to say
the drinks is slowing, the drinks is good. Don't forget to tip your
bartender. And they have three drinks all catered to me. Of course,
the Pink Ranger for obvious reasons, y'all know that's my secret identity. Of
course, the keep it Pee and the book then Busy, all of them
are amazing. And she got cash up, she got zeal, she got
memo, all that. Okay, So it's nobody right hands have you a
bartenders? Okay. Also, so the way this is gonna go is we're
gonna have three segments. At the end of each segment, we're gonna have
an intermission you can refill, chit chat, make some new friends, say
hi to your new cousins on that. Okay, sounds good. All right,
So let's get this thing started, y'all. So to focus, Like
me, I really wanted to talk to y'all about myself about a few things.
And y'all know I've been on this day in journey for a while.
I've been healing on this date in journey, learning a lot on this day
in journey, and right now I'm at the point where I feel like we
need to go back to acknowledging the importance of honesty and comfortability. I think
that a lot of times we're so busy putting on our representative that we miss
opportunities to be intimate, genuine, real, Right, So I want to
talk about a few opportunities that I feel like are missed to be honest and
to be comfortable. The first one, fellas, can we please stop sneak
sniffing. I like the fact that I didn't have to say what that was,
and y'all all knew what I was talking about. Okay, okay,
okay. My man said, expound, Um, you know, when you
get an intimate with a lady, you gotta do you know, the sniff
test? Right now, everyone in here just said, m we all acknowledge
that you are doing a sif a sniff test, right, So why do
y'all feel like y'all need to sneak and do it like y'all be swearing,
y'all slick with the we see you, we see you. It's not one
woman in here who has never missed a man when he tried to sneak sniff.
We know what you're doing, We know what you're doing. Like I'm
not sure, okay, I understand that you're trying not to be rude.
You want to test the waters on a low. But at the end of
the day, if her couchie snak, she know her couchie snink before you
know her couchie snak. So we don't have to be like sensitive about it.
At the end of the day, we just drying. Are you gonna
go? Like? And then I always think, like, you know,
what's a good way to tell a woman, like, oh, you're a
little tart? Is it a good way to tell a woman you a little
tart? So this is why I want to go back to the honesty and
the comfortability, Like how are you able to share your body with somebody but
you're not able to be honest in saying something? Rip your body? Right?
And then I think, like, what would I ever do if a
guy told me, like, bitch, you a little tart? Like,
ladies, I want you to sit and marinate on that for a second.
What would you do if your partner said to you you sank a little bit.
Okay, I'm gonna be like, I know, I know, I
know you ain't gotta tell me. You ain't gotta tell me. I know,
I know. I was just trying to see you. And I think
that once you have that mindset, somebody saying something like that too, you
can never affect you because at the end of the day, ladist, we
know, we know, we know, we know, we know. We
just be trying to see how far are you gonna go? And I want
to say, you want to point out the amount of chivalry and respect that
you men try to put off by doing the sneak sniff does not go you
know, unnoticed. We appreciate you, thank you, But if a snake
is sneak, okay, and I just think we should keep it there.
Okay. Um, next, when we talk about honesty and we talk about
comfortability, right, can we be honest and say that being a side chick
is played out? I don't, I don't, ye ain't. I'm gonna
hear that it was a lot of m Okay, hear me out though,
Just give me a second, please, please, When I say being a
side chick is played out, I think that if you are still willingly accepting
the role of a side chick right now. Maybe I know times is hard,
but it's being by yourself can't be that bad. It can't be that
bad. And if it is that bad for you, you need to go
talk to the lady because something going on with you. Okay, if you
really are having that much of a problem being with yourself, maybe it's you,
Like damn, maybe it's you. So I do want to point out
though, this isn't the the polly or the open relationship conversation. I'm not
talking about that. I'm talking about you are willingly signing up to be with
someone knowing that they have a partner Like I don't know. I just can't
get behind condoning sloppy seconds like that. That don't make sense to me.
And I know that the day in Bullish Trash, it got pissed, diarrhea,
all of it. I know, I know, we all know,
But that don't mean we automatically have to jump behind. I don't deserve being
number one, you know what I mean. And it's like the good old
American bread affairs are thriving right now, thriving, Like I know every one
of y'all know, at least one person who is just got out of or
is currently in the process of being a side chick because oh wow, God
damn for god, everybody, God damn. I thought I was going gona
want it too. Verybody's like shit, yeah, yeah, yeah, you
know, Keisha, she just put that in the group check you so yeah,
that's it's crazy crazy. He took out the etho it was okay,
it was okay. Um yeah, man, I don't I don't know,
like, and I also want to point out, like, men, if
you made a commitment to be in a monogamous relationship with your partner, you
got stand on that. Like, I can't get behind the oh well,
you know, she don't say nothing, so was cool, Like it just
doesn't do it for me, because I think a part of being a man
is being mature enough to say I'm not happy. This is what needs to
change, and if it doesn't, I am prepared to leave because I keep
telling you I'm not happy. Like I am appreciative that we are now getting
to the point where we're like, yo, men deserve to be happy too.
It's no more you know, happy wife, happy life. Like now
we're all getting on the board of happy spouse happy house, Like, that's
cool, fucking right, because I'm not gonna hold you. Y'all know,
I got a son, and if he ever tell me some flyshit like happy
wife, happy life, dump that bitch. Nope, don't like her.
She's not invited to Thanksgiving. She don't get no fucking banana point, nothing
right, nothing, nothing. Because anybody who's willing to make you feel like
you come second in a relationship that you should be equaling, I don't want
that bitch in my house, much less I eat in my food like I
don't believe in that, So I refuse to let my son believe in that.
You know what I mean. And a large part of it that I
feel like we don't talk about a lot either, is on both sides.
Some of us are in relationships because we've been in relationships for a very long
time, and I don't feel like starting over. I don't feel like getting
to know somebody knew. I don't feel like taking a time to figure out
you know how you like your eggs cooked, and you know what's snaps you
like when we go to the movies, Like, I know it sucks,
but that is a part of they didn't being in relationship and if you being
happy means you have to relearn all those things for somebody. You're just gonna
have to learn as we got temn things to somebody like god Lee, Like
Yo, it's hard because we all say, like, you know, the
dating pool is so hard right now, but we also don't make any attempts
for it to be better, and it's like you're just gonna keep swimming in
the piss or somebody going throwe chlorine tablit in this bitch. Like at some
point we have to be like, yeah, that is trash as a union.
I don't think we should do these type of behaviors anymore, you know,
like huh, I don't like feeling like that. I know my partner
doesn't like feeling like that. These are things that we really shouldn't still be
doing, and having a side check is one of them, okay, Like,
how can you really be happy if you're dividing up your attention, your
love, your dick with somebody else and somebod y'all ain't got enough dick to
split in the first place. So it's very rood of you, very roode
of you, very rood of you, very roode of you, very roode
of the audacity. I tell you, one thing these niggas never went out
of is the audacity. So so so I think that we need to go
back to being committed and focusing on being in happy relationships so that the side
chick no longer exists. Now decide, niggas is on the rise too,
Ladies. I ain't gonna sit here and let y'all have all the time we
want to talk shit on niggas. You know, that's not what we do
here. We take accountability here. So and I know you're like, oh
my god, I would never do that to my man. I would never
I love him. We as happy. We'll stop telling Earl about you lunch
because you know, Earl won't your panty draws. Okay, So we need
to be honest and saying yeah, no, that's no, it's cool.
It's cool because just because I know, right, I don't know why Earl
is just jumped in my name. I don't know, I don't if your
name Earl. I'm sorry, big dog. I don't even mean to come
and shoot like that. Hey, Earl, I'm sorry, big dog.
Earl. Earl is sweating like a motherfucker here, right if it's an earl
a here he is, he is, he's hot, he's nervous, and
he is hot. Okay, But like you know, there are certain people
who only certain things for you because they're interested in what they could potentially get
out of here. Like that is very much a thing. Now. Granted,
don't nobody want to be in the house every Saturday, so sometimes you
are gonna go off to eat with Earl because you don't want to be in
the house. But it's like, we gotta shift out of that mentality and
get to the point where it's like, yo, if I want better,
I have to put time and effort into being better and getting better. And
some of that is y'all. I remember seeing my dumbass in the house,
Like that's cool. I don't you feel like buying a new outfit anyway,
that's fine, that's fine. I really ain't feel like putting this wig back
going anyway, that's fine, that's fine. Like I'm not gonna hold y'all.
I did not feel like shaving my legs, that's fine. I gotta
stay inside. I gotta stay inside. It's getting cold. I got my
leg warmers on already. Cool. Cool, But like I really want us
to get to a self sufficient love, one that isn't you know, dependent
on outside factors, so that we don't feel like we need outside factors.
Where the it be, you know, earl, side chick whatever, right,
And I also want to say when we talk about side chicks, right,
sometimes we get into this mentality of you know, well, my girl
not saying nothing so I can have it, you know, blah blah blah
blah blah, or like, you know, I'm not happy, so I
deserve to have these times of you know, happiness, enjoyment, fulfillment,
whatever. But you having a side chick isn't a flex. You having a
side chick and your girl being okay with it, it's the real flex.
Like somehow we got wrapped up in oh I just get so much pussy.
No no, no, that don't impress me. That don't impress me,
Like you getting outside pussy and your wife being like, hey you got a
big dog. Okay, cool. I can respect that. That's some players
shit, that's players shit. I can get behind that. But you just
fucking willy nilly on the low. It's not it. And ladies, I
also want to say, we will not have the luxury of not having to
share our niggas until we stop sharing our niggas. Right, So when we're
entertaining these people who absolutely you know, you know, you know they are
trash and them being handsome, maint enough, them having money ain't enough,
Like you just want to share because you just want something like going back to
like I said, we're just being by yourself, Like it just ain't it.
It ain't it? Next card, The last thing I want to talk
about when we talk about being honest and comfortability is I want to tap into
being sexually comfortable with your partner. Like I'm all for trying new things,
but like sometimes nigga read the room, like seriously read the room, Like
if you know that your girl is not secure within herself, why are you
even proposing bringing in someone else into the sexual bedroom? Or like you know
what I mean, Like, if you know that your partner is barely getting
by with you, why are you trying to jump to eat masts? Baby?
We still we didn't even master hitting it from the back first, Like
you can't even catch it properly for real, for real, So so so
why are we automatically jumping to or we need to try some new shit,
Can we be comfortable with us first? Can we be comfortable with us first?
Like, can we focus on mastering a level of intimacy where we are
both satisfied before we jump out the window and you know, bias X swinging
da dadda. I'm all for trying new things. I'm not saying we shouldn't
try new things. I'm saying, can we take the time to build a
stable foundation before we jump out the window and god damn, just do some
off the wall ship like off the wall shit. Like now, I'm not
saying you gotta do missionary until you saved the thousand lives. That's not what
I'm saying. What I am saying is tap into your partner. Are they
being consistently satisfied? Like if you haven't mastered making your person reach the point
of pleasure every single time, don't you worry about what other toys we can
bring into the badroom. Don't you worry about buying butt plugs and candles and
wax whips, chains bringing somebody else into it. Okay, we're gonna get
there eventually. Let's have a solid foundation to build upon so that, hey,
we know there's no insecurities evolved, like sometimes people are hesitant to use
toys and be comfortable taking things on to the next level because it's like,
bitch, I'm barely making it. I don't know if you can see this
or not, but I'm barely making it. So if we take the time
to build this level of foundation, I think it's it's gonna be so much
better. Like the intimacy is more intense, like damn a bitch, you
might want to start kissing again. Like it's it's it's it's it's different.
I don't know the word for it, but it makes my shoulders go like
this, I don't know. It's it's different. It's real different. Um,
And I think that it's baby steps. You build your foundation. You
provide a safe space because also when we're venturing out and we're trying to be
comfortable with one another, we want to make sure that we have a safe
space. Like I want to make sure if I let you eat my ashing
or tell nobody this is between us, bitch, Okay, I want to
make sure if you know, I let you you know if I'm sucking upside
down Spider Man style off the side of the bed, like you ain't gonna
tell anybody if I throw up a little bit, that's between us. It's
between us. Don't tell nobody. Don't tell nobody. Right. So more
important than building a foundation is always building a safe space. Now, who
who got the navigation on where you trying to go? Baby? We're here,
we're here? Who who you know? What? See? Okay?
Um? Another thing I wanted to talk about where we're being honest and comfortable.
I know I said the last thing is the last thing, So what
shout up? It's my show? Um. Another thing I want to talk
about, and this is this is real. This really hits me in the
heart. Who my t swingting? Whole swing a lot, dude, my
tesus swinging? Can I get a napkin? Jesus, Ain't nobody gonna give
me? No, No, I just want to napkin to the preacher.
Pat you know you don't rub you just tap it real quick, just just
tap it. Yeah. Hell yeah, thank thank you, God, bless
you, sir, thank you. I hope them be to sweat. Don't
pop up on that goddamn camera. You ain't gonna see no clips from the
ship. Come out and carry here. You ain't gonna be talking about me
on the internet. Oh that's that bitch with the sweaty titties. Did you
give me a napkin that had a chip on it? Because when I swung
it, a chip a chip fell off. And I know I ain't had
no chips in my titty. I had no chips in my titty. I
know that for a fact. Okay, so no, no, no,
I gotta not your titties. It's it's cool, it's cool. I got
some some Totinos titties, just Totinos titties. Thank you, Thank you for
the Totinos titties. Thank you. You know what. It's I'm I'm here,
thank you. They're mine, thank you, thank you. Um,
I'm just gonna put this behind me. Shut shut your ass up, Shut
your ass up. You know see that's why we can't have nice things.
Okay, Um, I don't remember. I'll talk about chocolate, jess,
y'all. You know what? Okay, you know what if that we're just
going to end segment. Why now, Okay, we'll run take a quick
break. Take this time to get some drinks, talk amount yourselves, sip
your barts in there. We're gonna be right back with our guests for this
evening and really the hostess with the Moses Samaya from the se Content House.
We'll be right back, y'all. Makes a noise, makes a noise,
makes a noise. All right, y'all, we're back, makes a noise,
makes some noise, makes a noise. Yes, And I just want
to remind you, guys, any pictures, any videos that you are taking
today, make sure you tag se Content House that is something extraordinary content House.
If you like what you're seeing. You have a private event coming up.
You want to host a black owned excellent as event. You want to
come one down to se Content House. Okay, make sure you guys look
them up. It's amazing hashtag support black women. All right. So we
are back with segment two of our live taping of Chocolate Chip and Sip here
in Atlanta, Georgia. And I have a guess with me today, ladies
and gentlemen. And not only is she the finest woman with locks I've seen
this side in a Mason Dixon Okay, she is informative. Okay, she
is smart, she is kind, she is beautiful. All right, I
want you all to make some noise for Miss Sexual Essentials, your hands on
sexual educator, makes a noise, make noise, makes a noise, and
she shows pretty you're the oldest woman, got an old spirit talking about jen
is the liquor of choice. Yes, then she said earl earlier. I
didn't forget that one. On this side of the Mason Dixon. I got
an old soul that can't help it. I understand. It's given nineties five.
See listen, you know, did y'all people? The sip in the
background, the paint, it's a sip. The chocolate chip and sip.
Okay. Um, So, I wanted to talk to you guys about this
lovely lady to my left. Um. One of the things I really want
to stress is the makings of a bad bitch, all right, And I
think that's really exemplified and me and you and how we came to, you
know, know each other. And I just wanted you to expand on it
and talk on that for a little bit for sure. Um. So,
hey, y'all, y'all look good, y'all look good. Um. So,
my name is Saboya. I'm the owner of Sexual Essentials. And I
met Stormy on the set of Tonight's Conversation podcasts and we were there and I
just I really gravitated to her, and honestly, I didn't know her from
a can of paint. But making relationships as an adult it's kind of hard,
you know, like you don't really yeah, you don't really go anywhere.
You kind of wait for somebody to break in your house and be like,
oh I love you, or like let's go out. Yeah, like
I got snacks and I honestly, I just vibed with her energy, and
I told her it was just it was a few things that she did that
kind of just told me that we were in alignment, or at least I
should, you know, get her number, or at least just you don't
ask her about like hey, can I hit you up sometime, or like,
you know, let's get to know each other. Even though we both
had a show, I didn't directly ask her to be on my show,
and she didn't ask to be asked me to be on hers. I like
that because a lot of people just give that stuff away, like you didn't
work for it, earn it, and like, you know how difficult it
is we get all the way to Atlanta or live shows like she was.
She had boundaries around her business and just the conversations that we tapped into on
the show. Her responses just told me that, Okay, we think in
a like minded way, and I think just as adults, you have to
be after you get past thirty, a lot of the relationships that have been
in your life are starting to transition now where you gotta tell my business.
Damn bitch, I was talking about people. I'm twenty five. I was
talking about self, selfless self. Just turn you look at as thank you
know, black don't crack unless she's spending the gym posting every day. I
was like, oh, I'm gonna not eat so she get here so um.
But yeah, it's just like her responses, and it was multiple things.
It was like her approaches on dating that we were talking about, some
of the business things that we were talking about, Um, the things that
she was asking for when we were just talking about networking with each other and
some business ideas. And also she was nasty and I was like, okay,
grow a woman shit Like that's some grown wanna shit. Like I don't
know, as an adult, I don't really want to be around a woman.
It's like grind sucking his deep. I don't support that. Yeah,
it's it's me what I wish yall could see the standing ovations. They just
standing ovation, the standing over stand. It was the standing ovation for bed.
Y'all gonna have to tap in the patriarch and watch the live video events
right now, because is that what I feel like? It's what I do
more. I need to know bel Peace Prize or something, because like they
stood up and I felt kind of good listening listen, like, yeah,
did you see them praising the Lord? It is praise God is not pleased.
He is not pleased. No, it's not. I thought that was
okay, okay, but go ahead. I say all that. I say
all that to say that's real. But like, I don't I don't think
there's anything to your point, you know, segment one. I don't think
there's anything attractive about being a subpart person in anyone's life. Like I think
we can all agree that adulthood hard is like it it's so hard. And
then as soon as you pay all your bills, I sort of God the
first come in like uh yeah, like and it's it's like y'all in here
and y'all see the product of like some amazing stuff, but it's so much
other stuff that goes on behind that and just even talking to her, um
the things that she said she wanted to do and you know what she wanted
to get into next. A lot of people are fine where they are,
and the fact that she was already talking about next when you know, you
know, it's just I like that and so in you know, we contacted
each other when I left for the recording and then let's see what else.
Oh, I call her crime one time because life was like I was like,
gir I got work to do and I don't feel like doing it.
I said, so if you listen. But you know why, I think
that a lot of times women especially struggle with is making genuine connections without feeling
like there's a competition between you and for us both to be you know,
in this social media space, it's similar, but it's separate, Like we
align on different platforms in different topics, but for us still to support each
other was very important to me, and I feel like it's never been in
any sense of like competition or a lot. I can't help you because that's
going to fear what I got going on, Like, I appreciated that a
lot, a lot, and honestly, that's really what did it I was
able to reach out and do more because we were being honest about like where
we had similarities, and a lot of our pasts are very similar, they
literally overlap. So a lot of times you're running away from the person that's
like all they're trying to do the same thing as me, So I don't
need to be rolling with them. Perhaps in a barrel, perhaps in a
barrel, but most of the times you're scared because you don't have the boundaries
to say what parts should you guys be sharing or doing together, or resources
should you be sharing? Or you don't know how to really teach someone,
you just know how to give them the answer. And so those are some
things that I think that we need to reflect on internally. But I called
Storm because I was just having a really hard time with like getting this house
up and going and she was just like I was, like, you know,
as especially as a mom, she's also a mom that talks about sensitive
to topics and vulnerable topics and you know, very vocal with her sexuality and
just a live wire, you know what I'm saying, A bit strenth gym
for goodness face like you know what I'm saying. So being able to call
her and just be like, this is what I'm going through, but I
have work to do. Can I talk it through to you? And she's
like hell yeah. So just even in that conversation finding out more about what
she wants it to do. UM, I was able to send her some
people there. There are people that want to work here at the concert House
that I don't They're not ready for that step, but I'm not ready to
commit with them yet. But I'm like, hey, I have someone else
who also does like production. Um, and I think this is more of
you guys to speed. Let me introduce. She being very generous, your
girls the plug okay out here, saying business back and forth, and I
said, thank you, gonna bless you for this. So yeah, you
got a question already? Cant can we wait till we get to the question
part? Or you gotta like right now, right now, right now,
right now? Or you can't wait it? What? Can you come over
here to the mic? Can you come over here to the mic? All
right? Watch my man's chords over here. I can't hear you out on
the mic. You on a mic on a mic, Mic on a mic,
big dog on a mic? How do you feel about co parent co
parenting. Oh yes, oh I love this woman. Huh huh, life
on a mic, on a mic. We're going through some shit. Okay,
I got two kids sixteen eleven, okay, before her, like even
tonight, my daughter around side? Oh michee outside, good connection, good
connection. What do you feel about that? Now? I have no problems
mhm, sexy, no problems with anything. Hey, hey, hey,
takes good care of me. Amen. Good word. Well, I'm gonna
interject right here. So when she was asking you about your question, um,
I think she wasn't sure what you were gonna say. But she has
a whole Q and a part at the end of the show. So this
we're gonna finish some of the topics here and they will respond to that one.
Okay, all right, but you hold that, you hold that U
So yeah, So I feel like a lot of that just her being able
to be vulnerable with me and tell me what she wants. A lot of
grown ass women, boss ass women are not able to tell you what they
want, you know what I mean. A lot of us get nervous.
It gives us anxiety. We do not feel comfortable saying, actually I want
it this way, you know, what I mean or hey, I know
we're doing this, but this is actually what I want to do. So
if you know anybody that can connect me with that, please let me know,
tell me, tell me what you need. I don't have time,
Verrio, God damn minds. Yeah, just turn that off today. So
went to jail for that shit. Yeah yeah, that not the makings of
a bandage. So so yeah, it was just different things like that and
just just being able to recognize those things, but ultimately just saying myself and
her. You know, when you're in alignment with yourself, it's easier to
pick up on other people that are similar to you in that way. You
know what if you know how like you get dressed and you're about to go
somewhere, you put on the outfit and you get that feeling like, yeah,
it's the one I'm goot to suck them up with this one. Like
that that feeling where you're like, okay, yeah, this you might put
on one of two, that one that you feel like okay, yeah,
this's it. You start feeling that when you grow your intuition and you grow
yourself love and you grow self awareness, saying you build those business boundaries and
you have the tough conversations and you grow, you know, when you pick
self. And as a woman, I feel like it's been easier to make
friends in business colleagues, like even with men, being more aware of those
things, because I'm able to recognize the people that are ready and willing to
get that back but also ready to receive it. It's been easy to love
on Stormy and I like that, like as a woman, like a lot
of them, like I don't fuck with women. She ain't say that.
She was like, gird, I've been like a girl because I have.
I have. That is a real thing. Now. When we were talking
previously about you know, quote unquote the makings of a bad bitch, there
are a few moments that really stuck out in my mind, and I wanted
to know if you had any to share it as well. So I want
to talk about sexually. So I was like all of you, the men
too, think about when you felt like you peaked sexually, like yo,
I'm that nigga, or like yo, I'm that bitch. Like it could
be different things for you. It could be like yo, you stop gagging.
It could be like yo, you went more than ten minutes without pumping,
like we're stop pumping, you know what I mean? Like it could
be different things, right, so listen, it could be anything. So
for me, I think like sexually, especially if we're talking about just sexually.
I felt like a bad bitch the first time I told a man I
didn't come, And it wasn't just I didn't come. I demanded a duel,
okay, like nah, ain't gonna being all like yo, I didn't
come that si, I demanded he finished, and like I can't explain it,
but it gave me such a feeling of empowerment, like I felt like
that bitch, Like these niggas ain't gonna be humping on me no more.
I got feelings too, I gotta put me first, Lucius, like I
felt that hand. I felt that so I wanted to acts like what's a
moment for you sexually where you felt like this is the makings of a bad
bitch. This is where I feel like it's it. I'm her, I
got too, Can I go to Yeah? Absolutely? Okay. I feel
like the first time I realized I could drive the boat, like I didn't
need the man for sex, Like I was able to do the four play
for both of us do the oral, do the riding, and we both
get off. Yeah, like the flip you over a girl, let me
just do it myself, like when you realize you could hit that ship just
as good as he could hit that ship. Because you know, when men
don't like how you hit it there, just flip you over and do the
shit theyself because they know what you know to do. Y'all. Y'all,
I'll be thinking, y'all slick out like yeah, I'll be like, oh,
girl, I was right. Who's so good? He just had to
flip me over for he can't know, bitch, he was hurting, so
he had to flip you over. Um. So I feel like the first
time I knew I was able to do that, to be like a thorough
giver. Um, I take part of that just because in a partner,
I think a lot of people be on the slow road to resentment because they're
not really getting the things that they want sexually. UM. So, just
being able to like show up for my partners, you know, it's important.
Um. And I think not I think I even know. I feel
like this story I know, and you know because you know you know what
it is. You know how you say some of you go be like,
how did that come out? Like I remember amongst friends, we all cousins
are here, all right, so y'all have a what's sucking on the dick?
And then it like a lot of men know, and I may be
wrong, I may be wrong, but a lot of men here like maybe
he just lose a little win, like he don't he don't stay hard or
whatever, and you know their sexual chemistry and you know they want to fuck
like because sometimes you know, like when get hard, you know it's because
he wasn't really that interested. You know, I'm not talking about them.
I'm talking about like nigga get excited and like y'all really been playing or doing
something his shit just don't you know it just fuck with him on purpose,
because it's like it's like us when I like a period, come on,
when you know you're about to get about to damn, you know, it's
like that. I think that's the same thing for him. The first time
that I responded and my response got his dick hard, I was like,
I'll show you that girl. M It was a confidence booster. It was,
And a lot of times I think that a lot of women their confidence
booster is how they do certain things. But I think my confidence booster is
the way that I can make people feel by being kind, being intentional,
Like it's like four play all day when you cannot be rude to someone and
still like have boundaries, communicate what it is that you want, Communicate what
it is that you don't want not offend people, you know what I mean,
Like, really communicate what you're feeling. Like the howard of being able
to get your point across where people don't have to agree with you, but
they can't respect to what you're saying or hear what you're saying and say okay,
I can receive that and just now have so many argument of moments in
your life, or like have awkward sexual moments, like I don't want to
re traumatize myself, you know, because I can't communicate how I'm feeling in
a sexual situation that may not be what I thought it was going to be.
And I I mean, I think that a lot of people don't invest
a lot of people don't invest in getting better in sexual terms. They might
buy more toys, but they don't really buy more classes that are talking about
sexual education. A lot of people are skipping the foreplay of everything when you
It's funny when because when you started a conversation, I thought you were going
on the path of, oh, you're just a pleaser, but it seems
like, no, you're just a good communicator and you're able to make your
partner feel comfortable through that. Am I like on a right path saying that
or no? Yes and no, okay, yes, because I definitely became
like a giver, but I think that the elevation of that was not becoming
a giver. I think I started off as a giver and really I'm a
I'm more like a give like I remember, more of a rewarder. Yeah
you know what I mean, Like at the end of the day, when
you take care of me, whether that's emotionally, physically, or whatever,
the things that it is that I need, which I'm able to tell you
that I need right when you're able to do that, I'm able to be
laid back. I'm not defensive, you know what I'm saying. And when
I'm in my natural state, just as most women in our natural like feminine,
like most relaxed, not aggressive or and y'all know how y'all be when
y'all walk past, when you at the at the gas station. You like
your ass cheeks has cleansed. You defend like that's not your most relaxed state.
Not me. I don't when somebody to tell me I'm beautiful. That's
where I get all my compliments is at a gas station, and I just
I think that I'm more. That's not funny. Don't laugh at him,
y'all. Don't laugh if y'all didn't hear over there, he said from earl.
Don't please just please shut up, please down the street. You know
it's funny, you said, taking care of me, right, and so
I wanted to get into the makings of a bad bitch mentally. So what
was the point on your journey where you said, like, you know,
like mentally emotionally like this right here, I'm a bad bitch. Like being
able to be responsible for my emotional reactions to things and not make people responsible
for how they make me feel, and understanding that no one has a responsibility
to my feeling. It's the accountability, you know, auntability. Somebody please
please they they are, you know, everyone is responsible for respecting me and
respecting the boundaries that I set up right, and I'm responsible for or sticking
to those boundaries and committing to them, And so ultimately I feel like I
am responsible when either I let someone in that I knew shouldn't I be there?
They didn't, you know, go through the things, um. And
I also feel like I'm responsible emotionally when when I don't like the way something
happens, like I don't just because something makes you mad don't mean you should
tell somebody like you made me mad that how did did they make you mad?
Or did the way they responded upset you? Or like what finding out
why I was responding to things the way that I respond to them, so
I can find a better way to respond. Like, I just feel like
a lot of the things that as women we were focused on that we value,
like love and trust and you know shit like that, I don't think
those are the same things. All right, you are you? You gotta
pause for me, Okay, we're gonna do question. But this is also
a live recording, so her audio is going to go out next week,
so we don't want to mix and have all the blurred sounds from the background.
That's why it's like super pin quiet. It's not It's not like we
don't want you to participate. She just has a time for it so that
they with the audio can come out the way she wants to. Next week,
Covie, thank you. I think that something important that you said is,
um, I'm responsible for me right. And I felt that because I
felt like I was a bad bitch, like mentally emotionally when like I'm like,
yo, I know my worth, yeah, even though my pussy or
stumping and I want my gut stirred, I know my worst right and having
a strength to be like you can't have it like that was my moment of
like I felt that like the power and not being And I don't want to
say when I say weak, I don't mean it in a derogatory term,
but like sometimes the flesh g's weak, not the flesh. The flesh weak,
okay, And you end up giving yourself, whether it be your time,
your body, whatever, to people who don't really deserve you because the
flesh is weak. And once I reached that point, was like, yo,
I don't care how moisty s panties get. I don't care. You
know how many cramps I get from blue walls, not blue balls, blue
walls, Okay, I don't care. I don't care how hard it gets.
I'm not going to give it to somebody unless they deserve it. Once
I reached that point, I'm like, yeah, no, I'm not bitch.
Yeah I'm that bitch. Yeah yeah. I feel like a lot of
us um our panties be controlling every thing. Yeah, just like we talk
about like ro man need to learn to control they dig nah, y'all,
I need to learn control. Y'all puts it too, because y'all be doing
a whole bunch of shits. I think, don't nobody know about We could
tell. We could tell that you're still sucking on him. I can tell
because every time you walk in the room, you start acting different. I'm
acting different. I just think a lot of women, a lot of women
be putting on this. Fuck it's Audie, And look, don't let the
potters stop part potting, okay, because he gotta pay for this, and
he gotta pay for that, and then you'll be fucking on the nigga that
you're paying for it. It's crazy that you say that, like it's so
full of shit, Like you can't be honest. I feel like even if
you are doing something for someone, like oh, you're doing something y'all don't
even be honest that you're helping someone, Like you're not really honest about anything.
Y'all just be loud as fuck for no fucking reason. And it's just
like you offering information and nobody even asks. That's the clear sign that you're
not even confident in who the fuck you are. It's crazy. It's so
crazy that you say that, because I don't think standards are a real thing
people. I don't think standards exist because if someone is fine enough, has
enough money, or makes you feel special enough, all of them standards go
off the window. Since I thought you said he had to wait ninety days,
Oh he's six two with a gold chain in a pretty smile, So
now he don't like you know what I'm saying, Like, I don't think
that standards really exist. It's just finding someone who checks off enough boxes where
it's like, I mean, I can't, I guess, And I think
that's for most people. Standards don't exist, and I think, and I
think I know for me, those those boundaries are difficult to have. These
things that we're talking about are saying that if I want this type of person,
what does that type of person, what does their life look like,
how do they speak to people like, y'all don't know how to details of
what y'all want. Y'all just tell y'all want them to be tall, y'all
want them to be fine. Y'all want them to be smart. That's general
as fuck. Hitler was all of probably those all them things, all them
things, like y'all literally asked, y'all asked for somebody to be six three.
You want them to make six figures. You want them to be,
you know, powerful, You want them to be able to put you on.
Donald Trump can do each and every one of those things. That's what
you want to be fucking on ye Like, you don't be specific, it's
just you date someone that fits in the spot that you have open. You
date like you trying to take a cab or a taxi and you have no
accountability for that because you don't know how to sit alone. You don't know
how to think. Damn, I'm gonna get him to get my number when
you get into place, like you you be ansty like, how'm gonna make
sure that he see me? So? Like you be so pressed, so
pressed, set up up, start off like I think so and you don't
and we don't be pressed enough about ourselves. That's the problem. I don't
give a damn what the fuck you pressed? Aboy? Bitch? Do you
but make sure you keep that same energy for yourself. He ain't by hell,
I need a man it buy me flowers every week, bitch. I've
never seen a flower in your house. Why would I know? Like,
I don't have time to memorize how to love you, especially when you're not
You're not even practicing on how you want to be loved, to love you,
how you love you. This set today is giving nineties vibe? Is
it not? Does Does she not look like like a like a little chilly
Liliah? You know what I know about you know what I know about Stormy
is that's her vibe. You know what I'm saying, Like she gonna always
be a sporty, fine ass chick. It's like, damn, she kind
of hood with you, but she pretty as fucked. Like I knew this
was gonna be her energy. Like when we called the set designer, was
like, hey, this is her style, Like things like that the bartenders.
You saw the name of the drinks er. We're not looking at create
the fucking wi We're trying to see what information is she telling us so we
can figure out how to love that person. If you don't know, if
you're bland as fuck and you're just you're not difficult, I'm easy going,
I'm simple to please. Then bit you're gonna get some simple ass shit like
nobody is saying. Y'all don't have the specifics. You know what I'm saying,
the type of person you want. You don't really know what you want.
I don't uphold the specifics. And because you don't treat yourself nice,
you end up dating anybody that treats you better than you. Yep, anybody
that treats you betting you. So if that nigga gets you on a massage,
that's what you like. Oh, I ain't never had a nigga do
nothing like that. That's my husband, that ninety minute massage. Come on,
somebody like, come on, you have to treat you so good that
you can tell when the energy stepping in is matching or is it less than
what you're giving yourself. You know what I'm saying. That doesn't mean that
they're a bad person or that you need to pull them up to that level
and teach them. It means that right now, this doesn't really align for
me, but you know, maybe we can revisit that, y'all. So
you know we're so thirsty for nigga. I know it's more it's more of
us than it is to them. But that don't mean like except shit.
Like she said earlier, like if you want certain things to stop, you
gotta stop playing into it. And y'all think that people don't talk. What
y'all post on the internet is not what we're talking about. Niggas are talking.
They're like, man, that the girl is lying. I wouldn't over
there on the first night. And I know this. They're telling me.
The niggas tell me, they tell and I'm not saying you can be telling
me, just so ya know, they'd be telling me all that stuff y'all
be saying on the internet. Do not be what y'all really be doing.
Okay, it's not. That's why the nigga laughing so hard. Okay,
it's not. It's really not. And I want y'all to stop it,
you know, so you know, go without a little bit, you know,
go without a little bit if you've been in a relation, if you
camemeber the last time you've been single for longer than a year, the odds
aren't probably talking to you at me, bitch. How many people, I
mean, think about how many great people are really in the world. We'd
be having so many time feelers because we'd be bored, yes, and then
you wonder why you ain't got this and why you ain't got that when you
could have been using that energy because you're settling. You're settling making every moment
of your life a dating moment. Every moment is not always like a great
relationship moment for you. Maybe the relationship to the great relationship that youre is
just you. Maybe it's working on your relationship with your family. But I
always got a nigga on the mind, like always and always. You know
what's crazy? Men are like that too. They've really been programmed to think
like how many women can you have? And how many bitches as you fucking?
And so a lot of them are always with time filler people too,
people that they really don't one a day. They just feel like they got
to be with the woman to show up or you know, as quiet as
it's kept. I know that we have this notion of like, oh,
men are pussy crazy that's all they wanted to do. How many notches can
they get on that belt? How many women can they conquer? But ladies,
we be husband crazy. All we're trying to figure out is when is
my husband gonna come? What I gotta do to get them? How I'm
going to get on the black love feet page. Okay, that's all We're
worried about. Me and somebody's son. Me and somebody's son, that's all
we focus on. It's not even how do I prepare myself to be a
wife, you know? How do I prepare myself to be a good girlfriend?
How do I make sure if me and my partner get into something,
we're gonna be able to work it out and move forward successfully without further issue.
We're not worried about nothing else. How am I going to get the
right lighting so that my picture is good enough to be on me and somebody's
son like that? That's what we're worried about. And that's not it.
You know, that's so wild. Because we have this panel. It's called
what Men Want, and it's for June for like Men's Health Awareness Month,
And one of the things we talk about is like literally what they actually want
and a lot of men don't really bring up sex. I feel like a
lot of men bring up peace what they want are not even And this came
up on my podcast. A lot of this came up on my podcast where
a man was talking about he doesn't enjoy sex as much as he used to
because it's so much pressure pressure for him to show up, for him to
perform. He gotta how hard dick, he gotta have the moves. He
can't just do the same thing every time. And it's like sometimes he don't
even want to have sex. But it's like when men don't want to have
sex, it's like, well, damn, you don't like me no more,
or like they can't they always have to show up when the woman wants
sex. But at the same time, women can always decline sex with men
and they have to be cool with it and things like that, when a
lot of women don't even know how to respond if a man doesn't want to
be sexual. And so a lot of men aren't pussy crazy at all,
they really have just a lot of men have not really found women that they
like or have affection with that they aren't having sex with. A lot of
them are treating sex as the affection, as the confidence booster, as the
validation, it's all of those. They get a lot of those things from
sex. So a lot of men have never felt real affection because they always
get affection from women that they're fucking, so they don't even know the difference.
A woman doesn't have to be having sex with you to respect you,
but a lot of men the bars in hell, like they don't even get
respect. Like I love pickymn. I love a pickyman, like stand on
it, like there's nothing wrong with that. Like I'd rather a lot of
woman man that they can fuck a man. I'd rather pick me. I'd
rather picky man than a pick me man. I can't stand those pick me
man, you know what, I'm pick me man maybe on the internet talking
about like, oh, you know you should send your girl four hundred dollars
for a first state to get her hair and then be fucking everything everything walking
from the side. Don't get you know, I don't be thinking. I
don't feeling like I got a podcast. I feel like I got a TV
show. So I can't relate to some of these. But I just I'd
be so sick of it. I'd be so sick of it fucked up everything.
That's why we brought back nineties audience recordings. I know that's right.
What that man said, y'all want you to make some noise. That's stay
in a segment too. We're gonna come back with some more of y'all make
some noise, makes some noise. I wanted to tell this story, and
I wanted to bring someone up, hopefully to provide some clarification. Okay,
So you know how like when you're dating right and you decide this is fun,
but we're not a good fit. So now we are ending said dating
period. Right. So me and this man went on probably about five dates.
He paid for three, I paid for two. Now this last fifth
one that we are going on. I picked him up, I took him
out to eat, I paid, I dropped him off at his house.
Now, before he got out the car, let me finish. Don't think
you getting nitties. Let me finish, Let me finish, let me finish.
Okay, Now, before he got out the car on this fifth date,
I said, hey, I really like hanging with you, but I
just don't feel like things are developing romantically for me. So you know,
we can still be friends if you want. If not, it's cool,
just let me know. Right The door opened, like, like, are
you saying this? Honestly? He had he had winning for a kiss,
and I said, hey, real fast, let me just talk to you.
See something you gotta ask questions because she was gonna leave that part out,
so I said, you know, I don't see things developing romantically.
I'm open to being friends. If that's not what you want to do,
it's okay. Just let me know, take some time to think about it.
And he looked at me. He was like, why would you make
me work a full shift before you fire me? And I was like,
whoa, what do you mean? He was like, you could have been
did this ship? You didn't have to, you know, take me out
to eat and blah blah blah blah blah. But I'm confused because in my
mind, I'm treating you would love and care. Yes, I'm handling it
tenderly. I was doing a nice gesture like at least you don't feel like
you wasted your time. I took you out, I picked you up,
I paid, I dropped you off. Now, don't get me wrong,
I didn't do all this because I wanted to stop talking to him because I
I'll take me on dates like I chuck on niggas. I'll tell him I'm
not a shamed exactly. I like niggas that like nice things exactly. I
don't like niggas that don't like come on, come on. So but now
somehow, because I am ending it on this terms, those same claps don't
apply, you know what I mean. So I wanted to, Like I
said, I got a lot of pushback from it, and I didn't understand
why. So I wanted to bring someone up to hopefully clarify. So I
wanted to call out my man Taishan from the Hardly Initiated podcast? Can you
can you put up? Can you come up to the mic from me for
us? Can you tell me what I did wrong? Because I thought I
was being nice. I thought this was what it is. I think really
both of y'all last was wrong. Okay, okay, so first let me
clarification questions. Okay, you picked him up, uh huh, he sat
in the passenger seat. Huh my little passenger prints. Yeah yeah, y'all
roll to the date show. Did you dropped them off back in the house,
had him try oysters for the first time, too. You had my
nigga's nice and then went home with desert did and you did this for two
dates? Well, well it wasn't back to back, But I'm just saying,
like, of the five dates that we went on, he paid for
three, I paid for two. So prior to this day, you pretty
much knew this cat was okay. Now, if we're talking about growth and
being honest, right, yeah, genuinely I knew by date one. I
wasn't interested, but we were doing that seat fillers thing where we go out
just because we want to go out. Right now, Now I realized said
that part was wrong, But I'm saying, as far as ending it,
what was wrong there? Well? How long did the five dates go on?
Like was this like three months over like five dates? And what time
frame like a month? Five days? And probably like I'm off and a
half too. Yes, that's not let me tell you. Listen, listen,
we're grown. Your discernment is strong. After date one, you already
knew this cat wasn't it. That's why he was in the passenger seat,
that's but anyway, But anyway, the thing about it is at the point
where you know and I've already decided that this dude not gonna make it.
Let's just let's let's just make it a rule to communicate that right then and
there. It don't waste nobody time. I am there now. But the
pushback was, don't fire me after making me work a full shift. I
can't treat you nice before I let you go. I mean treated treating him
nice, but I actually getting give us masks him him him some dinner.
It's not necessarily tread. It was a nice said I ate before I came.
So I, Tyshawn, did you have something else to say to that
before I ad I just don't want to let you off. I'm working on
it. The Lord is working on it, am. So I feel like
a couple of things one two things can be true. Let's just say that,
okay. So first, I feel like him coming in for a kiss
is a mad, vulnerable moment to find out that you weren't interested anyway.
I feel like that's the part that sucks. And I don't think that's your
fault because you didn't know he was going to kiss you. But I also
think on both of y'all behalves, how many dates were y'all kissing on the
other dates or was this a first kiss? Because if if he waited five
dates for a first kiss knew what was going on, that's that's one and
then two. I feel like I'm not gonna say that she's wrong for the
five day thing. Now, I will say, as a woman, you
know that if you will fuck in ten seconds, you know I did that.
Now, that don't mean you will, but you know in ten seconds
when you meet that nigga, Yeah, I get a nigga some pussy.
Now, I might not be in a position to offer some up. The
bank may be empty, but I know that your circumstances. Was writing he
respected me in all blah bah blah, that I would have given that nigga
some pussy. You know you know I did. Now, I will also
says she taking this real will She's like, all right, whatever, y'all
saying the other thing. Though, we are wrong and you cannot cut off
every single person if your pussy don't pop immediately on the first or second date,
because a lot of times every time y'all pop quick, y'all popping for
the wrong one. So how do you really know? Sometimes sexual chemistry is
a little late comfortable. Yeah, toxic ass, bad habits, that ship
comfortable because I'm not gonna lie. If one day three he would have pulled
out like a backflip or some shit, I'm like, oh wait, hold
on, let's revisit this. Like he got some skills I ain't know about.
Yeah, bitch, can you do a backflip? Can you do atactly?
Like? Damn? He called her to be a power ranger? You
know what? We could two power rangers. We only need a few more.
Okay, that's real, But but I do feel like as an adult,
if you're really trying to date, you can't y'all fucking everybody that you
date or are y'all not dating because you shouldn't be fucking every single person that
you're dating. Dating has to mean like can we be cool? And do
I want to fuck without us having a fuck yet? And damn, I
can't respect you enough to go out a couple of times before I make sure
that I'm sure everything don't happen on the first time. Now when y'all fuck
up fucking and the y'all, y'all nut quick, y'all want that second time?
No, don't you like we could say bad because one time? No,
Like women usually be kind of courteous, like, let me just make
sure, but the fact that you acknowledge from jump on date one that you
knew damn well, you wasn't interested, You wasn't none of those things that
I just said, I gave a whole bunch of excuses that you can't use
because you did say I'm not You're right, and I don't apply. I'm
going to be honest with y'all all those things about in hindsight, in retrospect,
I look back and reflect and say, yeah, I could have stopped
to shit a long time ago. But I wanted to ask Tashan, at
what point should he have said I'm good, Because we're now on date five.
We've had a few hugs, but there have been no kisses, there
have been no intimacy really between us. So now I will also put out
there I'm one of those girls that I know it's going to sound crazy that
you will forget you didn't fuck, right, because we're gonna have such a
good time being assholes and providing genuine laughter and intimacy on other levels that you
will forget that you didn't fuck. You will forget you didn't kiss me.
You will forget we weren't really that intimate, right and please? Oh so
at what point should he have said, Yeah, I am enjoying myself,
but I still want to make sure I'm want to check in and make sure
we're on the same level whatever whatever I mean At this point in my life,
after the first date, I've had enough data to know what the situation
is. But I understand if we move to a date two to really get
some security and understanding, to make sure that I know what I think I
know. So it's not going past a day two, And it's not even
really about you getting wet or the sexual chemistry because it really starts up here
first, and the fact that y'all really not even able to really vibe on
that level. YEA, both knew it's so really want to take out a
bad bage, That's exactly. I think he was just very happy to be
in your presence and to be around you, and he was genuinely even it
was a level of satisfaction and that to be around you. But you I
wouldn't recommend you do that again. I I know better. I learned my
lesson. I learn my lesson. Huh. I have a question, Yeah,
what's so wrong about men and women exchanging like feminine and masculine energy.
I think I don't want to feel the pressure to not go out or not
get dressed up, or to dumb myself down to go out with you,
So you don't think that I want to give you some pussy Like I'm sorry,
but the bad bitshness is every day, so I'm not going to turn
it down a little bit just because I don't want to fuck. But at
the same time, I feel like sometimes men want to just want to take
somebody out too, because they want to, you know, look after somebody
or like pull out a chair, open the door, like sometimes they miss
being used in a chivalry way as well. Hold on. But I think
the problem is that sometimes men will be like, hey, I just want
to take you out whatever, and then a woman not wanting to fuck,
don't know how to respect him or just be a decent human, she'd be
like, yeah, you're gonna get that, like treating him like shit.
And then now they resent taking women out to just date and eat because y'all
treat them like they're not fucking people. But would be pissed if they did
that ship to your son. So you wonder why niggas won't take you out
just to eat like people, I'm doing shit for me like my friends expect,
like especially masculine ones, Like I don't mind exchanging that energy. So
if you're doing things for me, I don't mind, Like, hey,
I'm cooking. You're not my nigga, so that shit looks a little different.
But hey, I'm fine with exchanging this because sometimes you come up and
help me with this and at the end of the day, as long as
you're not thinking that like there's an eyele you on this pussy, then we're
good at the end of the day. If you like women, just sometimes
being around a feminine energy is enough at the end of the day. If
we can be mutual, you know, if can we mutually respect that because
I like you, said you a vibe. You know what I'm saying.
I respect you. But yeah, if you was pressed about getting this pussy,
you knew on day one when she wasn't giving you the look that you
wasn't getting that pussy, So pimping you gotta chill. Like I said,
I do think his feelings was hurt because he was like going in for that
eighty twenty like off a hitch. He was like going, and she does
the last bit. I didn't do the last bit. That was the first
rejection, by the way, that was the first time he went in.
And if I'm being honest, it was the first like intentional. Right,
he's done like a hug and then like tried to motion for like a kiss,
but you know I'm a pink ranger, so I stopped that shit got
in the further. But it was the first, like, no, I
am being intentional and trying to kiss you right now, to sound the first
one you felt the move away. There were no hes. Probably no he
felt the movie, yes, for sure, he knew to move away for
sure. Yeah, I don't like women can't read the room though, just
like just like women, women be mad aggressive when they like a nigga like
you know, but but me and are two like you know damn well that
you can't fuck. And you saw how you tried to flick with her in
the way she responded in that business casual tone. She ain't interested. If
if you she had her customer service voice on, she was not interesting.
Absolutely, Now I know how women get stupid sound like and y'all know she
ain't sounding stupid anything else. She would like to add, Uh, Philly
Nigga is definitely down that one. Y'all make some noise sometime, all right,
so um before you when y'all came in, I did ask y'all to
write some questions down, but you know it's gonna be like at random me
picking them out. So I wanted to open up the floor if anyone had
any questions that they felt comfortable asking, like upfront on camera. Whatever.
You can do that now, or you can play the lottery and wait your
chance and hope your question comes up. If you want to step up to
the mic that the floor is open. The Lord is calling one of you
to step forward. Let him use you, won't you come? Oh,
y'all all gonna be pussy sign. Come on, come on, come on,
bright you come and come out. First of all, Look at my
girl's shirt. Look at my girl's shirt. We got merch for sale after
this, y'all just like ya, Come on, come on, come on,
come on. Somebody is definitely come on backing off to that at home
for sure. That's a wild ass shirt. Yeah, I liked it.
You know what. You know, what's so crazy? We talk about like
us being so similar, have a shirt that I never released. It looks
like that it's from the Mouth master Class. I can't wait to see it.
I can't wait to see it. Come on, all right, son,
we're gonna talk about that. After that, we're gonna have some ahead.
Come on, come on. So my question, so my question is,
come on, come on somebody. So if you've known someone like like
for fifteen years. I'm thirty by the way. Uh So if you know
someone like over a fifteen years that you guys been friends for a long time,
holding each other down and you want to transition into a different space.
But you guys are both getting out of like six to eight year relationships and
you know, you take a nap together and then they say, oh but
I don't really want a relationship, but then they continue leading you on with
that energy. Do you just leave them alone or give them time? Because
I feel like that after myth s faith of break up, some people just
missed out comfort. So how do you move leave his ass alone? Thank
you? Thank you? I think I think that she knows that, but
she's up there because she needs a reason why. I think I'm gonna give
her a reason why. Okay, we got time, Yeah, how are
you gonna ask for permission for what you feel? And what the hell does
lead you all means if you're not opening each door like and why y'all trying
to why are you trying to trauma buy with your homeboy after the It's because
it's comfort and it's safe. I challenge you to explore friendship intimacy at this
time because maybe there is something that your friend can give you, But at
the same time, you can't be looking for him to feel a gap that
might need to be filled. I think you need to feel that gap yourself.
You know, I believe that right yourself, right um, And don't
be putting the ball in nobody else's court because at the end of to day,
what I know about like the type of man we say we like,
You don't have to suggest much to them. They the type of man I
know, I like, They know exactly what they want, you know what
I mean. I don't have to worry about them grabbing or getting it or
whatever like that. You know, men ain't gonna they're gonna get what they
want. And you know, don't don't push it on you already offering it,
you letting them know the door open now I don't push them, be
like, come and check that. We can't go down like that. While
you win, you get this healing phase. You might not be able to
see it because you win it bless it's not And then in a couple of
months you're like, oh, I'm so glad. How you do that?
Like or unless you really fuck you telling this whole story but outside of that,
no, like what I mean when I say we took naps like no,
no, I was fucking it happened once, and it's like, girls,
what I said, I say what I said. What I want to
say. I want to say, sometimes sometimes you and your couch you don't
be the same page. I feel right, But I do want to say,
it's no special set of rules or playbook that you need to go by
in order to get your man okay. And if you feel like you have
to do certain things or move certain ways, that just means that he's not
interested. A man who is interested and intentional about you won't make you question
yourself. And if you feel like it's getting down to that point, it's
not to say it's nothing wrong with it, because it's okay for people to
want different things. At this point I don't think y'all want the same thing.
But more so than that, don't feel like you have to validate you
being sexually open or trying anything. At the end of the day, if
it is your friend, and it's a real friend, that still is somebody
that you should feel safe with and comfortable with. And you know, if
one thing leads to another, you don't owe anybody in explanation for you fucking
on that nigga, like, so, don't feel like you have to create
something from it to validate or like feel like you didn't, like, damn,
I fucked on my friends, So now I gotta make it mean something
like on your own sexuality, which is you know what, I really needed
that comfort. Thank you and leave it at that. Hey, sometimes one
plus one equals skeet, skeat. It's okay, and maybe they like,
maybe that's why you outside. You gotta all right, don't make a thank
you, thank you, thank you? Yes, anybody else got any questions?
Come on up, baby, come on up, shut up, don't
do that. Shut up, shut up. I mean, why and when
did we end up having the Internet be our god such as such as Evan
and be a reference to a relationship. I think the internet became our rule
book when it came to relationships once we stop having an abundance of examples of
good relationships. So instead of being able to refer to, you know,
your aunties and uncles who've been married for thirty plus years, or your grandparents
who've been married for fifty plus years, even though we don't really want the
examples because that ship wasn't healthiest, but like, you don't have those to
go to anymore. So we're we grew up in an age where if you
wanted to know something, you googled it, So now we are just transferring
that to relationships. We want to know something, so we listen to what
we hear on the internet. What do you think? To be honest,
I think that this generation mad different. They looking for something that's deeper.
And I think that when you're looking for something new, you make a lot
more mistakes. And we know that because like the people that came before us,
and like our parents and our aunts, and we love them, but
they stood still for a really long time just being okay with how things were
because we don't want to suck it up. And this generation just so bad
ass. They'd be like, oh, I'm not happy at this job by
like out, you know what I'm saying, Like they're just there. We're
way more like discover base. We're trying to figure something out, and I
don't know, like if we're gonna figure it out in this lifetime, I
really don't know. But I do think that the people that raised us didn't
really have great boundaries. It was more so do as I say, not
as I do, and do it because I said so. They don't really
have the words or the vocabulary or the emotional intelligence to still respect you and
explain why something may not be good for you or whatever. And so we
have a lot of trauma. But this new generation like has two parts.
We have the trauma, but we also see the light and like I think
we're some dreamers. We believe that something totally different is possible, and just
we're pulling towards that, you know what I'm saying. So I think that
the Internet started off as a resource and it became something that we overly leaned
on because sometimes, like I know, there's a lot of negative stuff on
there, but you're affected by what you follow. I don't follow a lot
of stuff like I have to go on the shade room if I want to
see the shade room, you know what I'm saying. So sometimes we find
out that we have an issue from the Internet or we find our passion from
it. Like most of the places that I've traveled too are beautiful, but
I would not have learned about them outside of Instagram, just because that's not
really what my parents were teaching or how it was raised, you know what
I'm saying. Like you raised like especially if you raised like in a place
that don't have no money, or like your parents ain't got no money,
you know how to survive, you know how to work hard. Like there's
some people but it was in all the clubs and groups, and then there's
that person that just always had a job since they turned fifteen, and it's
okay, we can all get there. So I love the Internet because it's
a resource, you know what I'm saying. But I think that we give
it too much power versus you know, the accountability that's on us because we
are looking for something else, because we're looking for more fulfillment and more passion
and like real happiness, we're making more mistakes, you know what I'm saying.
So you know it's just putting stuff out there. I think that that's
not think. I know. That's exactly why I credit this. There's something
extradinary content house. I just got tired of people now puts as like content
to be honest, like you know what I'm saying, Like this takes real
shit, Like this takes real intellect, This takes real balls, Like I
just sweat it through my shirt twice getting up here talk to y'all, Like
it takes like you know what I'm saying. But a lot of people don't
have a career outside of that mic. They sit at home, thorough paths
and from the internet and don't have one client. Yep, like a lot
of it, Like you know what I'm saying. I really want to bring
back people that are doing it in real life. Like you have to ask
yourself what proof are you looking for? What is your boundaries when you following
somebody, Like do they do this in real life? Or you can you
google them? Or only their clips gonna pop up? Ye? Look who
you're looking into? You know what I'm saying. So I think that we
need to be willing to do more boring things, you know what I'm saying,
which is take a class or come to shit like this, Like that's
why we're doing stuff that's more fun, that's like help like R and B
yoga and shit here Like why because, bitch, you don't want to look
like a hunchback when you forty. So if I gotta play taint to get
you to stretch, let's do it, you know what I'm saying. So
it's about creating, you know, creating more things that have like more positive
you know, so I ain't mad at it. Run on a flaws,
y'all, Run on glass. All right? Listen, man, we have
just about ran up on our regular episode. If you enjoyed everything that took
place today, For those who are alive and on the set, after this,
we're going to be filming a special Patreon episode if you want to stick
around for that. We're gonna read some of the edibles that you guys sent
in and all that jazz. Please stick around for that. If you're listening
or watching on the internet out Gore's Internet and you want to get in on
this, sign up to the Patreon and get access to all this and more.
Before we get out of here, I want to thank some Maya from
Sexual Essential as y'all make some noise for her. Absolutely, absolutely, the
se Content House is amazing. I love that it's black owned. I love
that it's black woman owned. Okay, you deserve every blessing that is coming
your way, my chocolate goddess. Okay. Now, before when we keep
going, I'm wanta trying to clap for every name that I say, Okay,
because every name I'm about to say is important. Okay, So first
I want y'all to give it up for the av team we got shot at
a a ron make some noise, make Allois, Thank y'all, Thank y'all,
Thank Y'allum, and my painting the asses on the music all the way
from Philly. Y'all give it up for DJ Instand we trust and Main y'all
makes a noise, makes alois and the woman who has been lifting y'all spirits
all night via liquids of my girl, Kay little bartender makes yall tip,
makes some noise. Worr y'all, And we got my man brand on a
BTS makes some noise a brand y'all. Once again, I want to thank
the se Content House. If you are then landed area and you want to
have a special event, and you want to support black people while you do
it, definitely get into contact with some Maya from Sexual Essentials that I miss
anything. Um. I'm not sure what time it is, but I'm pretty
sure we bout ran out of time. If you called a ride, you
know, just go hidden order you. I love y'all so much, Just
you know, back to be all right, let's finish changing up. Listen
man as usual, Okay, follow me on the Graham at Stormy p p
e A, follow me at Chocolate Ship and Ship. You wanna drop yourself,
I should probably do that. I am here to work. Ok come
on, somebody tipsy off that Ginger Breaum. You can follow me at not
just another sex pie on the socials um here um it's s E content House
as something extraordinary content house. We do different events every month, makeup classes,
posing classes, um lighting classes, just different things. We to create
a calligraphy like, you know, making space for us to create without having
to turn it into a job or source of income. And also entrepreneurs anonymous
where we teach people how to turn influencing into retirement and content into getting paid.
Things like that. My personal page is Maya bugsy M. I a
bugg Z hy Um and follow the Sexual Central stage. We back up,
back up, baby. The live Sex Art Show is coming back in September,
so make sure that you just tap in with me. Um. Check
out the podcast Stormy. We'll be on there in a little bit so it'll
be great. Hell yeah, man, tune into the page round. We
are about to review some male sex toys. We're gonna answer some of the
questions that we're sending. It's gonna be late, okay, so sign up
or stick around, all right, follow me on the ground at Stormy,
p p e A at Chocolate Chip and save. And if you don't remember
anything else, please remember don't make somebody work a full shift before you fire
them. I love you and I'll see you next week. Peace. Same
as it everyone was