This is doctor Wendy Walsh and you're listening to KFI AM six forty, the
Doctor Wendy Walsh Show on demand on the iHeartRadio app. And I am taking
your calls. The number is one eight hundred five two zero one five three
four. That's one eight hundred and five two zero one KFI. A reminder,
I'm not a therapist. I'm a wise woman. I'm a psychology professor.
I've written three books on relationships and did my dissertation on attachment theory.
I am going, well, Kayles, screening the calls. I am going
to go to social media where we have you know, it's very delicate conversations.
Oh right, right right, Tony wanted me so. Remember earlier in
the show, we were talking about the comments the Tyler Perry made about that
the internet's all a flutter about black women should accept men even if they make
less money, as long as they give them love in other ways. And
Kayla very clearly said that she thought that a wealthy man had no right telling
a woman what she should need or what she should accept. So one of
our listeners called back in a talk back, and let's listen to that.
Hey, doctor Winnie's Arnold again. You guys probably won't play this, but
I want to say I think Kavis overreacting. It's not about settling, It's
about finding somebody that cares about you, that you care about. Monetary responsibilities
shouldn't really matter. If you can take care of them, she can take
care of them, as long as they're taken care of. But two people
finding each other it should be a beautiful thing. Okay, Arnold, I
understand your point. However, it is not my job or your job to
ever tell a black woman what she needs, what she should do, or
that she's overreacting. I wouldn't do that. We'll just leave it at that
hero who. Okay, well, let that would fly? All right?
Let me go to social media. The number is one eight hundred and five
two zero one five three four. Dear doctor, Wendy, help, I'm
currently five months pregnant. I do not like messages that start out that way.
Help. I'm currently five months pregnant. My partner has not been present
going to doctor's appointments, and I even had to go to the ear once.
This is my second pregnancy and I've been having some things come up.
I've voiced to him many times that he needs to be there with me.
His work schedule is crazy, and his work is aware that I'm pregnant.
Not to mention, he has several hours of what's pto, pto? Okay,
pay time off? Okay, thank you. I don't expect every single
time, but for example, when I have to go to the ear,
he's never there and he's always working. I'm in Oh, I'm in the
ar now crying by myself, awaiting test results, and he's barely checking in
on me. I feel so alone. I've told him how alone and terrified
I've felt. Am I wrong for having these expectations? Now we have a
new thing less sentence I just got to say because it adds the plot thickens.
The last sentence is with my first pregnancy that son's father was not there
either, So it's also triggering feelings of abandonment. Oh where do I go
here? First of all, if you're alone in an er, I want
you to know there are angels around you and caring people. I train a
lot of people in my psychology students who go into the healthcare industry, and
there are lots of people who are there for you. But I'm seeing a
pattern here that you're choosing partners who aren't giving you care, especially at your
greatest moment of need, physical vulnerability, when you're at an emergency ward.
And so this is you know, like if you went to see a therapist,
I'll bet you the therapist might say something like, well, this might
be confirming some unconscious feelings you have that you're not worthy enough of care and
love. But I'm going to tell you you are worthy of care and love.
And if this guy's not even caring for you when you're pregnant, how
is it going to help out with the kids. I am just so worried
for you. My best advice is to get more social support. Lean on
your friends, family, sisters, mothers, grandmothers, everybody you need to
get social support. Don't count on him because he's not going to change,
and you're gonna sit there pining away and being sad. You're gonna have to
get different social support because you've got a hard road ahead of you. All
Right, we have a caller, who do we got, Kayla? We
have Josie. Hi, Josie, it's doctor Wendy. Hi. What's your
question? Love? I I feel like I'm in a pattern I was married
for twenty five years to a man that every time he wouldn't get his way,
he would ignore me. He would ignore me for days or weeks,
and days or weeks he would give you the silent treatment, and you hung
in there for twenty five years. Our last year of marriage, I think
he didn't talk to me for a whole year, and we were practically living
in the same house, like if we were roommates. Anyways, moving forward,
I've been single five years. Two men I've dated. I would call
them, they wouldn't answer, text them, they wouldn't text me back,
and I would still hang in there. And I was like, wait a
minute, why am I doing that to myself? I feel like I'm in
a pattern. This is a big breakthrough for you. This is a big
breakthrough you realize it's you and your choices. I mean, they're allowed to
be however they want, but you're choosing people with poor conflict skills. And
I highly suggest you get a therapist to help you change. But a therapist
would probably say, you know, what does this remind you of in your
early childhood? Who taught you that it was okay to give me the silent
Yeah, my parents ignored each other. Oh, and this is what you
learn right, And yeah, this is what you learned is okay, And
sometimes you get out of that. Trying something different, even if it's supposed
to be pleasurable, can be terrifying. Right. Have you ever heard me,
Josie tell the story of the hole in the road. That's my favorite
example of personal growth. And I'll tell you what stage you're at. Stage
one is you're walking down the street, you don't see a hole in the
road, and you fall in. That's your twenty five year marriage, right
and with a silent treatment all the time. Then you're walking down the street.
This time you see the hole and you recognize it and you still fall
in. That's you right now. The third stage is you're walking down the
street, you see that hole, and this time you go, no way,
I'm not going out with that guy. You very carefully walk around that
hole. But the fourth stage is you take a different street. And so
it's about this awareness that you're growing, Josie. You're starting to see it's
a pattern. You're starting to see that you know it's not your fault,
but that there are things you're doing that are attracting you to these people.
So here's my best advices is just girlfriend to girlfriend advice the next time anybody
you date gives you poor conflict resolution skills, namely the silent treatment. Block
them, change the number to move on, defriend, unfollow, just disapper,
just disap here forever. Don't be in love with hope that they'll change.
Don't say, well I called you, Why didn't you call me?
Nope, nope, nope, nope. There don't get a chance to ever
ever ever call you or talk to you again. All righty h Josie,
thank you so much for calling. Should I go back to social media?
Tony? You said something? Was it time? I got Tony in my
ear? Because I just go on and on and on and he has to
tell me because we have to go to break sometimes. You know, I
will have more when we come back. If you would like to call in,
the number is one eight hundred five to zero one KFI. That's one
eight hundred and five to zero one five, three four. You're listening to
the Doctor Wendy Walsh Show and kf I am six forty. We're live everywhere
on the iHeartRadio app. You're listening to Doctor Wendy Walsh on demand from KF.
I am six forty. You have doctor Wendy Walsh with you. This
is the Doctor Wendy Walsh Show and I am taking your calls. The number
is one eight hundred five two zero one KFI. Okay, producer Kayla,
who do we got? We have Gina with the question. Gina, Hi,
Gina, it's doctor Wendy. Hi, doctor Wendy. How are you
good? What's your question? Love? I just wanted to know if you
feel like you have a divine partner in someone but they don't see it that
way, how do you kind of get over this, this feeling of not
being with that person. Well, my therapist used to say to me that
I should use the feelings. The feelings are messengers. It's really not about
this person. This person is a convenient object for you to project some of
your feelings of loss onto. And when you work with a licensed clinical therapist,
they will help you get to the root of it. And that's how
change happens, when your brain learns that it's not about seeking out unavailable partners.
I want to tell you you use that word a divine partner. It
sounds a lot like a soulmate to me, and these things don't exist.
When you become whole, when you have enough self esteem, when you have
healthy relationship skills, there will be a lot of soulmates around all of a
sudden, a lot of divine partners around. What this person is is an
object for your longing, an object for what psychologists might call an anxious attachment
style. And I really encourage you to get a partner in this, which
would be a good therapist who can help you get to the bottom of those
feelings, because otherwise you're going to keep finding partners like this that will bring
up those same feelings until they're attended to. We spend our adult romantic lives
going back to the scene of the crime, going back to visit our childhood
injustices. But now they tend to be good looking people, driving nice cars,
with good jobs. But that doesn't mean that they don't evoke in us
early childhood feelings. Gina. I hope that explains a bit, And thank
you for calling. Oh yeah, yeah, okay, Producer Kayla. Who
we got next? We have Terry with a question. Terry, Hi,
Terry, it's doctor Wendy. Oh hello, Hi, what's your question?
I want to know what kind of what would I look for a woman who
is a better class person? Does that doesn't mean educated because that means nothing
to me, but can carry on a conversation. You know, if I
mention mentioned Byron Peacher Shelley, they won't you left clueless. We'll have some
idea what I'm talking about. I saw you once, you're the thank you
for right age, and I'm taking I found you attractive. I know he
may not be around forever though. That's called trying to hang out and be
a backup mat. When we were talking about backupmates last week, So is
your question, Terry, you want to know where you can meet women?
Well, yeah, if I remember the Los Angeles Country Club, I'd probably
go there every night to make contact. But I'm not and I don't think
I could join there. I don't have enough. Well yeah, so a
lot of those private social clubs exist partly because they do give a supply of
mates when people divorce. There they are socially organized around couplehood, so they
don't let people be single for long because they don't want them mate poaching.
So they're very quickly to fix other people up and get them kind of in
the system. If you will, but let me tell you times have changed,
Terry, and it's all about the apps. The apps are for people
of all ages. Now, the fastest growing group of people on dating apps
tend to be people over the age of sixty. And don't be shy.
Everybody's on there. I will tell you this. Don't lie about your age.
There's research out of the Kinsey Institute that shows that when people lie at
the very beginning about something, whether it's the height, the weight, the
age, and all the things they do, then it's really hard to build
trust because them potential dates don't trust anything if it starts out with a lie.
So just be honest and be out there and be chatty, and you
will meet women. Trust me, they're out there, Terry, thanks so
much for calling. Okay, let us go to social media. I've got
more questions pouring in. Dear doctor, Wendy, I hooked up on the
first date. It was never the tension, but it happened. How do
you handle it when he doesn't answer your texts and calls? Driving myself crazy?
Right now? This sounds a lot like Gina, are you in love
with longing? Or it's a theme tonight, isn't it? I will say
this after this segment, I have a very special guest coming up, one
of the authors of the book The Rules. They have a new book out,
those two women who wrote that famous book The Rules, about how to
behave early on in a relationship. And I will tell you this. Hooking
up on a first date doesn't help. And I know you said it wasn't
the intention, and it just happened. Nothing just happens. What happened is
you either drank too much alcohol or you were overwhelmed with neurohormones of attraction and
lust and you went for it not thinking about You can't use short term strategies
to play a long term game. So how do you take care of your
feelings right now? You surround yourself with people who love you just for you,
your friends, your family. You remind yourself that you are lovable.
This was a big learning lesson and time to move on, all right,
Producer, Kayla, who do we have on the phone. We have mister
Smith with mister Smith. I'm mister Smith. It's doctor Wendy. Yes,
fam, thank you. I was just saying it. I've been married for
twenty eight years after a passionate evening with my loved one my wife. I
was telling her how great she was and how I really appreciate the gifts she
gave me, and she all of a sudden said, my boyfriend of years
ago. I didn't think so. And I was trying to figure well,
what did she just say? What like, her boyfriend didn't agree that you
had she'd given you nice gifts, that she was a good gift. Oh,
that she was a good gift. So this was a boyfriend before you
were married. Yes, and she's remembering it from thirty years ago. Yes.
Wow, So what is that? What is that saying about us?
Well, basically, so I want to be clear. So you told her
you are such a gift to me, and she said, well, my
boyfriend before you didn't think that, did I understand that correctly? That was
her name, right, But that was her saying I don't believe you because
I don't love myself. I'm reminded every day of people who rejected me.
It translated, it just means you can love me all you want, but
I don't love myself enough to be able to accept that love. Now that
doesn't mean your relationship is in the tubes or anything, but that's the basic
translation. You know, you hear from time to time when people say,
unless you love yourself, you really can't love anybody else. And some people
will argue with that because I don't think they understand what it means. But
if you don't like yourself, if you don't have enough self esteem to handle
the bumps and the shame and the embarrassment that happens in a very intimate relationship,
then it will be very hard to believe that someone loves you back,
very difficult to believe that. And here, for twenty eight years she may
have harbored these feelings. I think it would be a great opportunity, mister
Smith, to open up the conversation about why does this still stay with you?
Why do you have a hard time believing it about me? What's going
on with you? Because it's about her, it's not about you. But
you can always grow and learn more things about each other. All right,
Heading off to social media one more time. Dear doctor Wendy, what do
you think of a man who just met started saying, depending on your behavior?
I asked, what do you mean? He says, well, if
things go well, depending on your behavior. I thought this was disrespectful.
The fact was this was our first encounter. Is this behavior okay? No,
this behavior's absolutely not okay. If somebody says to you from the very
beginning, I'm testing you and until you behave the way I want you to
behave, don't think you've got me. Don't think you can trust me.
I mean, this is a very mistrustful person. This is a person who's
trying to shape your behavior, who's trying to control you. And by the
way, what is this, you know, mystery behavior that he wants you
to do. Is he giving you a whole list of you're supposed to be
his robot girlfriend? Dump him, block him, get rid of him.
Definitely. Okay. One more quick question before we go to break high,
Doctor Wendy, dating today is so hard. When the bill comes, do
you reach for it? Do you just wait for him? Do you offer
to split it? Listen, you are going to hear in my next segment
from the author of the rules, and I will tell you that she will
say, don't reach for your wallet. A man must think he's getting the
prize. And if a woman gives in and pays early on, it doesn't
matter if you make four times as much he does. It's a dance that's
going on in the early stages of courtship, and you have to keep your
pretty little manicure off your wallet. You'll have to sit there and put your
lip gloss on and let him get that check. Don't touch it? Are
you kidding? If you touch it, you've just said to him. Please
like me, please, please? Is I don't really value myself very much?
Please like me. I'll even contribute to half the checks. Please like
me. A woman who knows her worth sits back and says, that was
a delicious meal. Thank you. That's all you need to say. All
right, all right, when we come back, I have the author of
the rules. You are listening to the Doctor Wendy Walls Show on kaf I
Am six forty. We're live every on the iHeartRadio app. You're listening to
Doctor Wendy Walsh on demand from kf I am sixty. I told you I
had a special guest coming on the show, and I am thrilled to be
able to introduce you to Sherry Schneider. Now you're saying, now, who
is Sherry Schneider? I know I know that name. How do I know
that name? Do you know? How you know that name her. With
her partner Ellen Fine, wrote probably one of the most famous books in the
dating space in the nineties called The Rules, Remember the Rules? Welcome Sherry,
how are you God? Thanks Flendy, I'm so happy to have you
on the show. Finally, because that book was my bible. In the
mid nineties, I was a young news anchor in Los Angeles and dating so
many commitment phobic guys, and your book inspired me so much that a few
years later I wrote a book called The Boyfriend Test, How do we evaluate
his potential before you lose your heart? And it was very specific, like
here's what should happen on the first date, or here's what should happen by
thirty days, and here's the ninety day probation period. It was very very
specific. But you inspired me because let's talk about what The Rules really was?
And is it is a book about boundaries, isn't it? Definitely?
Back in the nineties, before we wrote the book, we noticed that girls
were just doing whatever they felt like. And that's, you know, great
for feminism. You know, getting the job and the career and the condo
and whatever else you want. You could chase stuff, but if you were
dating, it didn't work with dating to be aggressive and so available. So
we noticed that women were getting hurt or dumped or not married because they were
either making the first move or suggesting things we're moving in, or sleeping with
the guy too soon, or traveling to him. And we said, no,
it just does not work in dating because biologically men and women are different.
Men love to pursue, and they get bored when a girl pursues.
Themmers to the apple, right, But everybody wants everybody wants a mate that
they can value, that they have to work for a little bit, right,
And so many women don't understand that they're the prize sperm chases egg,
not the reverse at the basic biological level. So tell me some of the
highlights from the Rules. At the time in the nineties when feminism was really
exploding, you guys, you know, got a lot of criticism because some
people said, well, wait a sect, didn't we evolve past this.
Let's go over some of the basic rules from the book. The Rules,
Well, the first one is to not make the first move, so don't
call, and today it's don't text, don't frond him on Facebook, don't
message him first on any dating app, because that's the biggest mistake you can
make, because you'll start a relationship that wasn't meant to be, because you
may not be his looker's type, and you'll be chasing him, will be
suggest seeing things throughout the relationship, and you won't feel secure or desired,
and it will just be a disaster exactly. Don't make that first move no
matter what. Although one of the things I said in my book is you
shouldn't reach out to a guy, but it's okay to issue the invitation to
him. And that's that subtle art of female flirting, the hair flip,
the look at him and then glance away, just to let him know that
there's an invitation waiting if he wants to make the first move. But you
don't do it right, right, okay. And what's another rule. We
don't pay. We don't travel to the guy. Like you're on the West
coast, there might be interesting restaurants near him. Women think, oh,
I'll go to his eric because I'm going to get interesting rest We're not interested
interest in west shots. We're interested in courtship. So they traveled to you,
even if you live like in a boring town. I I love this
It's amazing what women will do. They'll meet guys on a dating app because
they think love is about luck instead of strategy, and they will jump on
planes and trains and automobiles thinking that the shiny penny lives in another zip code,
so they will head up there, and it is just the wrong thing
to do. Again, you're making it so easy for him that he's going
to lose interest. So I love that rule. We don't pay, we
don't travel to you. And and of course you don't have to say it
like that. You don't have to say it firmly, right. You can
be sweet and say, oh no, why don't you come visit me,
you know, and just leave it okay? Those those are good ones.
And what's the third rule? We don't initiate exclusivity talk. A lot of
women, you know, especially after they sleep with the guy, will say,
now that we've buck together, what are we They will, you know,
talk about the status of the relationship that posted on Facebook. We don't
do any of that. They have to suggest exclusivity. They have to say
stop dating. I'm going to stop dating other people. I want you to
stop. Because if it's not his idea, it's not going to walk.
So here's something that we might differ a little bit in our idea on that.
I do think that this is how women get into a lot of situation
ships where they're seeing a guy regularly, they're sleeping with him regularly, and
he's seeing other people and he doesn't need to have exclusivity because you haven't asked
for it. I actually suggest to women that you ask for exclusivity before you
even have sex. And what I mean by this is you don't have sex
too early. And I know you agree with me on that you build trust
first, and when it comes around you say something like listen, you know,
for health reasons, we don't have to post on Facebook who we are.
We don't have to tell our friends or family. But if you're having
sex with me, I'd like to know I'm the only person you're having sex
with while we're getting to know each other. And that has worked for many
women to lay it out because this situation. I mean, what do you
say to a woman who's stuck in a situation ship if you're not sure that
he wants to be exclusive and don't sleep with him. We're saying that it
has to be his idea because what men are doing is sleeping with you and
then saying yeah, yeah, we're exclusive. That they don't really mean it,
right, You can't coerce the man into being exclusive. They should bring
it up. If he doesn't bring it up within a couple of months,
then that he doesn't feel that way. We're just move on. And that's
another really important piece. There are so many women that will hang on to
a piece of a guy because they're so afraid of abandonment or that he'll leave
them if they exert a boundary or what have you. But you talk about
clearly letting him go. They're more fish in the sea right right, And
we have barometers. I mean, if he's skipping weeks, then he's seeing
someone else. If he's asking you to split the check, he doesn't really
like you. It's not about the money. He just doesn't think of you
in that romantic way. If he skips your birthday, Balshein's Day, holidays,
he's gone into you. So there are checklists and signs way before right,
you see, before you know, you realize that it's not appens with
him. Rather than trying to to be observed and on dates, instead of
telling people, instead of telling a man I like to be courted, or
I want you to do this, or I want you to open the door.
We don't tell men what to do. We just observe their behavior and
then we can make a decisions. We watch them and make the decision.
And the hardest part for women is making that decision because they think, well,
I just need to be cuter or hotter, and then he'll change or
then he'll see that I'm the nice, fun girl. That's no problem.
No, this never works. He has to think you're the hottest thing in
the world and he has to pursue you because you can't change him, and
you have to be willing to walk away. That is the most important thing.
When we come back, one of the authors of The Rules, Sherry
Schneider, is going to talk to us about a new book just out this
week, The Rules Handbooks. Stay with us, Sherry. You're listening to
doctor Wendy Walsh on demand from my guest is author Sherry Schneider, the famous
co author of the book The Rules. She has built an empire out of
teaching young women how to negotiate commitment and how to deal in the world of
love, including coaching workshops, that help people establish their own self esteem,
have boundaries, and understand their own life philosophies. And now this week she
is giving us the Rules Handbook. Sherry Schneider, take it away. What's
the Rules Handbook? Well, many of the women that are dating outs were
like babies when the first book came out when seven years ago, so they
don't even know that you're not supposed to reach out to a guy first,
or pay or travel or go on vacation with him for a week, you
know, other than your honeymoon. They don't even know. So this is
like mind boggling new information for them. And then for other women who do
know the rules, they forgot it, they skipped you know, they did
it for a while and then they stop. They need a refresher. But
it's also to address some of the issues like people say, oh, is
in this games? You know, I'm not busy and I'm turning him down
for tonight. For the reason you're turning him down for tonight even though you
have nothing else going on, is because if he asks you last minute and
you say yes, you're setting a precedent for last minute dates and for him
not to value you what a man values you, they ask you out in
advance. I mean it sounds in playing. It sounds old fashioned to say
you gotta play hard to get, but you do. You do because men
want what they can have or what they think is, you know, unavailable.
You know, they want the popular girl. They want the girl who
isn't just sitting around waiting for them and available in a moment's notice. What's
going on today is crazy. Guys are like texting girls at ten pm what's
up? Can I come over? Or can you come over? And they
go. They just feel like it's an offer and they're going to take it.
So there's low self esteem, there's lack of boundaries, a lack of
confidence. And we have horses and we do consultations with women to help them
figure out where they're going wrong or how did you meet? Did you speak
to him first? A lot of women have vagueness around dating. You know,
they'll count calories, they'll count their steps, but they have no idea
who spoke to you first? How long the calls are. The calls should
be ten minutes. Calls are just to get a date. They're not so
like stay on the phone for seven hours. Oh yes, I've known people
that have done that. They meet on an app and they have a three
hour phone call. I'm like, what are you doing night where they sleep
with the phone. They go to sleep separately on the phone together and wake
up on the phone. It's yeah, insanity. So the Rules Handbook address
is this whole issue. This is not a game. This is self preservation
and it's life and death because you know, your love life is the most
important thing in your life, you know, other than work and family and
friends you want you know, well, we work. We work so we
can get a mate, so we can improve our status and have more money
so we could get a higher status mate. Work is just an ancillary thing
to human mating strategy to create families. If we are put on this planet
to reproduce, and our job is to find the most fittest mate. And
when I say fittest, not necessarily just physically fit, but economically fit,
intellectually fit, so that we can produce healthy families. And what's happened is
since the onset of the birth control pill, women have and own their own
orgasm. They have their sexual freedom, but they forget that biology hasn't changed.
They have a fertility window that men just don't have And you tell women
about this in the rules handbook, don't you Yes, but you have no
time to waste. So if you're a relationship for a year and he's not
talking about the future marriage ring, then you have to say, after nine
months or so, I've enjoyed these nine months, but I was a woman
where this is going. And if he says he doesn't know, that means
no. Right. What women do is they stay with a guy who doesn't
know for five years. If you guys know right away, they know in
the first day, the first week, they know you're either their look,
they're type, they're you know, they like your personality, or they don't
you know. If the guy doesn't know after nine months, you just say
nice, you know, nice knowing you, I'm going to move on and
if you know, and if you want to propose, just call me when
you're ready to propose. But I'm not going to date you while you're figuring
out. That's such good advice. It is about being your higher self.
Your higher self is not desperate, it's not clingy, is not taking crumbs.
You know. Your lower self just wants, you know, what's good
for now. So they're talking long term, you know, happiness. I
had a TikTok video that I made that went viral where I basically said,
guys, put your comments below if you agree with this. On every first
date, what's going on in the mind of the man is am I meeting
my wife tonight? Or am I going to get to have sex? And
that's how they think. And the man are were like, I like six
hundred thousand men going yep, pretty much, that's it. They literally when
they go on a first date, they're putting women into one of two categories
from the get go. And what do you say, I get this a
lot. What do you say to people when they say, well, oh
it's different today. Times have changed, right, Well, it's just new
technology. But like you said, biology has not changed many women men with
the huns, women like security. You know, men like you know to
bungee jump and fast cart women. I don't know any women about wife.
I know guys that talking about sports for seven hours. I know women that
can talk about a relationship. They can talk about one date for seven hours.
So we are different, and we tell women what's changed in social media
so there are more ways to break rules. You can text him, message
him, you know, follow him on Instagram, all kinds of you know,
oversharing, and we say, don't be an open book, don't reach
out first. You know, if you haven't heard from a guy, don't
say, you know, how are you? What's going on? I thought
we had a connection. Don't prolong the misery. If the guys skipping weeks,
don't ask them what's going on, it means no. Right. Not
hearing from him means now. I once heard a woman say I have not
heard from him in two weeks. I'm going to call him and break up
with him. I'm like, you've already broke You've been broken up with him.
It's already broken up with you exactly. You know, I teach,
I think you're very brave and wonderful to be telling the truth because I teach
developmental psychology, and I have one little section on sex brain differences, literally
the biological differences between males and females. I also want to remind everybody out
there with all the gender on a scale and gender diversity, that one percent,
that's one out of one hundred people are intersects, and also that gender
is a bit of a scale. In other words, not every male is
a super masculine alpha male. It's okay to be a feminine man, it's
okay to be a masculine woman. However, when it comes to human mating,
there certain kinds of mechanisms that go into play. And Sherry, you
ladies of the Rules figured it out a long time ago and let the world
know. Where can they get a copy of the Rules Handbook. It's on
Amazon today and it also addressed much just dating and marriage, but rules for
everyone. So, like you said, you made in a same sex relationship,
or you may be hurt by your friend or sister or your book,
you're a dull child. You need to pull back in whatever situation you're in.
If you're the most sensitive one, the one that gets more easily hurt,
you're the one that needs to do the rules. That's great, a
wonderful book about boundaries for everybody. Thank you so much for being with us,
Sherry, it's a pleasure to find Take care and you can pick up
a copy of the Rules Handbook anywhere. This brings the Doctor Wendy Walls Show
to a close. It's always my pleasure to be with you every Sunday night
from seven to nine pm. You're welcome to follow me on social media at
doctor Wendy Walsh. You've been listening to the Doctor Wendy Walsh Show on k
f I Am six forty. We're live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app. You've
been listening to Doctor Wendy Walsh. You can always hear us live on k
f I AM six forty from seven to nine pm on Sunday and anytime on
demand on the iHeartRadio app