Hey everyone, and welcome to this special edition of Parenting Beyond the Headlines.
I'm Sarah Cody, now Amy Alamar and I have decided to re release some
of our favorite episodes from the past during this difficult time of the pandemic,
just in case you are taking more walks and listening to more podcasts, or
in case you're on a precipice changing your life once this pandemic clears up and
we return a bit to normal, which we hope is happening with the spread
of the vaccine. That's the reason why I wanted to share this episode from
twenty nineteen. It features author Sarah Bliss. She wrote the book Take the
Leap, Change your Career, Change your Life. She gives some great advice,
and you know, there's been a real conversation lately about the pandemic taking
a hit on women, particularly who had to leave their jobs, who had
to leave the workforce, to teach from home, to juggle all the different
things that the pandemic has put upon us. So I'm thinking maybe some of
you are going to re emerge this summer this fall with some new direction,
pursuing some new dreams. So hopefully this podcast will help be well and thanks
for listening. Hi, Welcome to Parenting Beyond the Headlines. I'm doctor Amy
Alamar. I'm an educational consultant and author, and I'm looking at the news
and how to apply educational practices to talking about the news with your kids with
my very dear friend and colleague, Sarah Cody, and news is something I
know about. I'm a news reporter with the ABC affiliate here in Connecticut.
I've also written for magazines and newspapers, always with kind of a kind of
a focus on family issues. So we're excited that you're joining us here today.
And we have sort of a fun topic, right, Amy, Yeah,
a very personal topic. Yeah. We like to take an article and
sort of jump off of the headlines, as we told you. And there
was an article recently in Forbes magazine titled Moms twenty eighteen is your Year to
get hired. So, you know, many moms stay home for a while
and find themselves struggling a bit when they go back to work, Yeah,
or adapt while home right with baby and trying to make two things work right.
Yeah, And according to this article, studies show seventy four percent of
professional women rejoin the workforce after taking time off to have families, and we
were reading that Sutton Foster, who we all love, just went back to
work after having baby. Yes, yes, it's so complicated. We both
know from personal experience, and sometimes that requires a reinvention of self, sort
of a revisioning of who you are, because what you might have left in
the workforce might look different. And so today we're excited to be joined by
Sarah Bliss and she is an author of Take the Leap, Change your career,
Change your Life. So Sarah, welcome and please help us, help
us leap. Well, thank you so much for having me, guys.
I'm so psyched to be on talking to you guys about this topic. I
feel like it's you know, the interesting thing about having a baby and you
know, going back to work is it's actually an opportunity to reinvent yourself.
It really is. I mean you don't you can use it, use that
time off as like a reset and a time to reevaluate what you want in
your career and maybe consider trying a new one. So you're going to take
a leap was literally just published very recently, and tell us about it.
You focus on these inspirational stories of how to, you know, not to
be afraid, how to make a change exactly, And it's the time of
year where we're all thinking about that with the new year, so it's it's
great timing. But so so, as you know, Sarah, I have
written profiles for about twenty years, and I've interviewed some of the most fascinating
people. And one of the things I learned early on was that a lot
of really successful people had these whole other lives and careers before they found their
groove. And I've always thought that that's really inspiring and something that a lot
of people don't realize. I think we kind of buy into this idea that
so many successful people knew what they wanted to do when they were six and
you know, or in college and just kind of kept on a straight path.
But I don't think success actually works that way, and I have proof
that it doesn't. So I featured sixty three people who have made these really
inspiring changes, and I actually have a lot of moms in the book who
used the gap to reinvent and shift cares. I know you told me once
before in terms of how to do it, look to others for inspiration and
ask questions. Yes, Actually, I think the best thing you can do.
And I think sometimes when you're making a change, it can just seem
so overwhelming, or maybe like this idea that you have that's just like a
cool idea, but like, how is it ever going to be possible?
And I really think the first step is finding someone who has made the change
that you want to make. That is will be really helpful because those are
the people that will really tell you what the hurdles are, what to watch
out for, and how they accomplished their goal, and that will help you
with forging your own path. And I one of the things you said is
don't be afraid. And I know that I've heard expert advice. You know,
I'm parenting. Don't parent out of fear, parent out of hope.
Do you have strategies or mantras or using the examples? How are you not
afraid? Well, I mean, I honestly think a lot of confidence comes
when you think that something is realistic and attainable, and then you start kind
of doing those small baby steps to get there. I think you really have
to do the work. You know, there's a woman in the book whom
I had to write some amazing advice. Her name is Jennifer Gefsky, and
she has a firm called up Prey and it actually helps moms get back in
the workforce after a parenting gap. And one of her best pieces of advice
was to, you know, make sure that you have the relevant skills,
that you keep up on relevant skills whether you want to go back in the
same career or you want to try a new one. So there's a lot
of work that you can be doing that's actually going to help you get a
job and look better to employers. And one of the things are you taking
an online class, doing some research, getting certified. I mean, I
know people who tap themselves how to code, or applied for small business loans
or or pilot programs or accelerator programs for new businesses. But there it's like
a lot of different small steps that you can take so that you are really
really ready. And I think the more the more you prepare yourself, the
more confident you're going to be when you are ready to make that jump.
And also you're never really going to be ready. I mean there's especially once
you have kids, right if you're waiting for that moment where nobody needs you
and your kids are totally fine. Well, you're never going to get out
the door. That's a good point to make. We can convince ourselves.
You and I have talked about this before. Maybe we should just get it
out of the way. Sarah and I went to Trinity College and Harvard together.
We're friends. I'm so proud of this new book and the success you're
finding with it. Sarah, and we've talked before about how you know,
you can convince yourself almost any negative thing you want. That inner voice in
your head can be negative. You know, you can talk yourself out of
anything. But you've got to kind of change the mindset to take a leap,
right You got to think that you can and look to other people for
that oration. And maybe that's another strategy from avoiding the fear, getting away
from the fear is seeing the positive in the hope, right, yeah.
Yeah, And I also think surrounding yourself with people who kind of believe in
your vision or having the courage to kind of tune out the ones that don't.
I mean, everyone that makes these leaps, these leaps are not easy.
Everyone that makes these leaps has a very unshakable belief that they can do
it, and they also expect it's going to be bumpy. They expect the
hurdles because they just that's life. There's no I think sometimes if you're not
confident, you can see an obstacle and think, oh, gosh, this
wasn't meant to be. I mean, I interviewed a couple who decided to
open a restaurant in the Caribbean. They had had one in Pennsylvania. They
found a great spot, but it took them three years to sell their former
restaurant. One of the buyers actually ended up dying. I mean, there
was a lot of different things that weren't working by the time they sold it.
They went back down and the restaurant owners said, oh, you know
what, we decided we don't want to sell. And then they said,
all right, well we'll lease it too. So there were a lot of
bumps and a lot of times where they both could have turned to each other
and said, you know what, the stars aren't aligned, this isn't meant
to be. The signs are saying that this isn't going to work. But
they didn't think that way. Instead, they were like, you know what,
this is what we want. This is the goal. We're going for
and we just need to be patient and do everything we can to make it
happen. And now they live this amazing life in Anguilla running veyaut which is
one of the most popular restaurants on the island, and they're very happy and
their kids are in school there. They brought their whole family. So you
could certainly argue that the bumps make you stronger and wiser and you know,
more resilient. I think so definitely. And I think when you accept that
they're inevitable and that it's not going to be easy, then you're better off.
Um you know, especially with with kids. Um, every there's such
unpredictability. I mean, you can be on a high in your career and
doing really well and then you you've got to leave in the middle of a
meeting because you're your kid is sick or needs you, or the night that
you're supposed to be preparing for something, your child, you know, had
an incident with a bully and they need your full attention. So it's it's
just never it's never easy, and you really can never give your attention wholly
to to one thing or another. And and and when you accept that and
that there's it's you're imperfect and it's not going to be perfect, then then
I think you're more set up to do well. Such good advice, and
I like when you're referencing specific stories here it is the mom who was a
hairstylist or she is still a hairstyle as I believe, and she actually chased
an entirely new UH side career. Tell us about Nicole. Nicole Ltera is
amazing. She has a hair salon in Cromwell, Connecticut called the Hair Zone.
She grew up in a family that everyone was Her mom had a business,
so she said, I was born to do hair. It never occurred
to her to do anything else, and she loves her job. She loves
making people happy and the confidence that comes with that. But then she also
is someone that always wants to help people and found herself in a lot of
scenarios where people were having accidents or getting hurt and she always was the one
running to help them, where other people would kind of look on helplessly.
But she wanted to have even more skills, so she decided to become an
EMT. She said, I want to be the person that's there for someone
when they need it the most. And she did that when she had one
child. She did it around her work schedule and her on the weekend,
so at night and on the weekends. And then a couple of years later,
after being at the scene of all these different fires, she thought,
you know what, I want to be the one running into the burning building.
I want to do more. And when her twins were four months old,
she went to school at night to become a firefighter. And she looks
back and she's like, I don't know how I did that. That was
totally crazy. But I think she had this this sense that she knew that
she wanted to do something, you know, in addition to being a mom,
and that being a mom didn't need to hold her back. And I
also think she wanted something that was just her own. And she loves the
example that it gives her kids that you can be a mom and you know,
be really brave and that you can do anything you want. And she's
she's thrilled with kind of the messaging that that sends to her kids and also
the confidence that it gives her. And I think that's such a crucial point
that you can't be everything, and you shouldn't be everything. So what can
you be that you are proud of? Right? Yeah, But I also
love to show your kids the way with this, show them you can take
risks, you can fall in your face, so you can get back up
again. That's right. And you know, Sarah, when we were talking
about this podcast, Amy and I we both kind of laughed and said,
we've we've reinvented ourselves before. And isn't that why you got to do sometimes?
And this is very personal to you because you consider yourself someone who hustles
to move from A to B to C to D and continue your career.
Tell us about you a little bit. So I started in the art world
right after college simply because I kind of I'd always want to go into magazines,
but I couldn't get a job in magazines. And I was an art
history major and I was able to look at a job there. And then
I tried to actually make the switch into magazines and it was really hard,
even as an assistant, and I had to go back to school and I
took a class at NYU at night, and all of a sudden, the
career HR people were calling me because I had something that showed effort and relevance,
and I was getting published in small papers, so I was able to
get in the way, and I just thought I'd be in magazines for the
rest of my life. But the magazine industry changed and I became a freelancer,
and after two thousand and eight, a lot of magazines folded, and
then the magazines that stayed in print suddenly wanted to pay half of what their
rates rates were, So I had to reinvent myself and create a whole branding
side of my business. I do pr I can solve for brands. I
do online content for them, I do in house magazines. I write speeches
for CEOs, and then I started ghostwriting books for high profile people like Bobby
Brown and Aaron Lauder. And after ten years of ghostwriting and having this idea
for this book all those years, I decided that I needed to reinvent myself
again and get myself back on a book cover and get this idea out in
the world. And so I'm so thrilled that Take Leap is finally out after
all, let's time and what are you finding? What's what's the reception,
Ben Sin? Since the book hits shelves, it's been so positive and one
of the things is. I just think it's really timely. I mean,
industries are shifting, people are having to reinvent themselves sometimes even if they don't
want to. The Internet has actually changed everything. It's changing the whole entire
careers. But the great thing is the Internet actually also makes these kinds of
leaps possible, and that's one of the things you'll see in the book.
I mean, there are people starting businesses in their living rooms. There are
moms who are able to start be entrepreneurs because they have this social media reach,
or you know, there's so many businesses that you can set up on
these great platforms. If you're an artist or a crafter, I mean you
have Etsy. I mean we didn't have that twenty years ago. You could
you know, if you were an artist and that was just your hobby.
Well now you can actually monetize your hobby. So there are all these really
exciting opportunities that are happening right now, and I think people are really starting
to take advantage of it. So the reception from the book has generally been
like, oh my gosh, I want to do that, I want to
take a leap, or I know someone who needs this. That has been
the most common reaction. So as we begin to wind down a little bit
here leave us with a couple of really key points of what the mindset should
be. If you want to take a leap, don't be afraid seems to
be number one, right, Well, you'll have to get comfortable with risk,
you really do. I mean, I think if you're waiting to feel
like to know that this is whatever your leap is is going to work,
and know with one hundred percent certainty that it's going to be successful, you're
never going to get that. You're just you're just gonna end up sitting on
the idea and watching someone else do it and wish that you had had put
it out there. So the first thing is you have to get comfortable with
risk and the fact that there is failure as possible. But honestly, if
you are really, really determined and you kind of do the work and you
prep and you get yourself educated or find a mentor and get ready, I
think that anything is possible. So the first thing really is that is that
comfort, that comfort with risk, And then the second thing is going for
it. And then the third thing is really expecting the hurdles and the bumps
and being okay with them and knowing that it's part of the process. Even
a dream job, as you know, Cody, even a dream job is
not without stress or problems. I mean everything, everything has has its ups
and downs. So just going for that career you really want is really I
think. I think the way to start finding a mentor I think is great
advice too. It makes it seem a little bit less lonely, it makes
it, it gives it a little bit of a structure. Well, thank
you, Sarah, it's been delightful to tell to you in this forum.
We really appreciate you taking part in our podcast. Tell us where we can
find your book, give us your website address, and where folks can find
your book. So Take the Leap is available at Amazon dot com and also
IndieBound dot com, which we'll direct you to your local indie bookstore that has
Take the Leap for you to buy. Fantastic. Thank you so much for
joining us today, and thank you listener. We are so appreciative of you
listening in and please send us any feedback you have or topic ideas and we'll
see you next time. Thank you so much for listening. Talk soon.