Hey, everyone, welcome to a very special edition of A Fool's Quest.
We here at A Fool's Quest have a Patreon page. You probably hear us
talk about it. It's a way for our listeners to financially support the cast
for us to do a bunch of different projects. The money that we get
from that goes to things like production, advertising, and something we're incredibly proud
of. We are able to pay our voice actors for their performances in shows
like the is Fete Archives, so we're very proud of it and something that
we offer in our Patreon in addition to ad free listening for all of our
shows bonus content you know, music chat, we allow people to make votes
on like what the titles are for our episodes and stuff like that. But
one thing that we do is a monthly recurring bit of NPC interludes. Now,
I've put a few NPC interludes in the general feed before just to kind
of, you know, toss it out there and let everyone see. But
for season seven we did something pretty fun with the NPC interludes. We did
an interlude for a Warlock, for the Warlock that is talked about throughout season
seven and kind of follow along with what the Warlock was doing while the while
the Second Breakfast Club was out doing their shenanigans. Right, So I wanted
to do something special and take all of the clips that we had from just
the Warlock part. So each NPC interlude has three scenes, and the Warlock
is one of those scenes for each interlude, and then there are two other
scenes, so the other two scenes aren't going to be in them. But
I took all of the Warlock scenes that we had over the course of this
season and I compiled them into one list, and I thought I should would
share it with the general public. We have a few different voice actors that
come in and out of the Warlock interludes, but primarily the two people that
are in these scenes are our good friends Garrett and Lace. I did put
their stuff in the comments or in the show notes rather, and they are
both in our discord very active. So if you are in our discord and
you have listened to these and you want to tell them that they did a
fantastic job, I think that would be absolutely stellar for you to do.
And if you're not a part of our discord, feel free to join.
I'll put the link in the episode notes here and tell them hats off.
Great work. But anyways, that's enough rambling from me. I hope you
enjoyed these interludes and this story about the Warlock and his friend the Fighter.
The Warlock Part one location somewhere in the illusion Nation. A warlock sits down
next to a fire and hands a flask of whiskey over to their friend,
the Fighter. It's nice to be back out in the wild. I was
starting to get cramped in that town. You're a warlock. You feel cramped
in any town. If I had your physique, I would have taken the
Fighter's path, But warlock was the only road for me. I do have
a really nice physique. Just look at my glutes. Gross ton't be jealous.
You're in a good mood. I'm always happy when we finish a job.
I know you are. But I am a little concerned because of the
illusionists. Yeah, that was a little too close, and one of them
escaped. Well, she was mortally wounded. There's no way she survived the
night. But she could have told someone about us. Well, if they
knew who we were, they'd have come already. I guess you're worrying about
it too. Much. You just need to relax. I'm a warlock.
We never relax. When was the last time you've spoke to your patron a
few days back? Maybe they'll have an update for you when they visit again.
It doesn't work like that. Sometimes it does, and there's always a
price. Yeah, we are paying the price right now. It's not that
simple. Yeah, yeah, it's not that simple. I know. If
you know, then why I suggest it. Let's just call it wishful thinking.
Sure, okay, where are the others? Well, they're not doing
a beer run. We figured that we were camping for the next few days,
so we might as well have booze to help us relax at night.
I guess that isn't a bad idea. It's a great idea. Campfires,
booze, music, and unholy warlock mercy are my ideal vacation. We should
probably keep the warlock talk to a minimum. And I'm not a mercenary.
Why should we be quiet? We're safe here. There's not a single soul
for two miles, just us, the animals and nature. Not every animal
around here is what it appears to be. There are changelings, mimics,
and druids. In this part of the world. You're so paranoid. Please
just all right, all right, I'll keep it down. Thanks. We
do need to figure out our next step, though. I have an idea
that we should wait for the others to get back. And it's a little
risky, and I don't want to have to explain it twice. Sounds like
fun. I figured you'd say that The Warlock Part two location somewhere in the
Illusion Nation. The Warlock and the Fighter duck their heads as they enter what
appears to be an abandoned mine. What is this place? I'm not sure,
but it seems important. I can't see shitting here. Can you cast
light on my sword? Yeah? Here you go, Thanks, let me
go first, of course, I wouldn't have it any other way. How
far back do you think it goes? Seems like a tight fit. I'm
not certain you're positive this place is important. Seems like a great place to
get eaten by a monster. That's ave. I was really looking forward to
a solid ninety five percent or higher. Sorry about it, any idea what
we're looking for? Not sure exactly, but there was some heavy illusion magic
over this place. The illusionists are I'm going to put that much magic over
a place if it's not important. What if it's just a place for them
to hide win on the road, like a bunker or something, then we
will search it for stuff they might have, and then leave a trap here.
Wouldn't want anyone thinking they can hide away in a bunker when shit hits
the fan. Oh damn, you're feeling particularly vicious today. Keep an eye
out for fake walls and shit. I can detect their illusion magic, but
sometimes these illusionists use old school few stricks for their secret places. I should
have brought the rogue. You're much better at finding that shit than I am.
I needed them to do something else for us. We'll be fine.
I'll be careful. Looks like there's a weird rock here, so don't trip
over it. I see it. Thanks, so did your patron tell you
about this place? Sort of? They pointed me in this direction. The
illusionist magic was stupid thick here, though I started feeling it while we were
like still a kilometer away. There's no way I wouldn't be able to find
it once we got here. Why do you shanky do that? Do what
need their magic out there for everyone to see? Well, they don't do
it on purpose. All magic has a signature, but it's broken down by
school. So illusionists can see illusion magic because they have an affinity for illusion
magic. So conjuration mage wouldn't be able to find the spot or to type
the magic, even if they were standing right on it. Well, conjurors
are idiots. You're so eloquent. Hold up, I thought there was a
school that could find other magic. Diviners can, and they take full advantage
of that fact. Those masterards will work with enchanters to create magic that can
detect magics, and then they'll sell them at ridiculous prices, capitalism at finest
mm hmm. Are all warlocks able to detect magic or just you? Not
all? But most our patrons see the value in gifting us that ability.
Stop. What do you see something? There's a small allusion to your right.
Let me dispel it. Would you look at that? It's a cute
little door. You're ridiculous what it is? Cute? It's probably trapped too.
You think they put that rock wall illusion over it as well as a
trap. Seems a little paranoid, don't you think? Have you met an
illusionist? They're all paranoid? Well, it doesn't look trapped, so I
guess I'll just pop on in. Be careful. Oh it's even cute on
the inside. What is this place? I don't know. With these couches
look super comfortable. How do you think they even got them in here?
I assume they were assembled here? Come here? Look at these They look
like maps. They are maps, But these here are the only ones from
you Frey? Well, what are the other maps from? I don't know,
but I don't think they're from this planet. Should we take them?
Yeah? Grab them up? All right? And what do we have here?
What is it? I'm not certain. It looks like a magic rod.
There are multiple schools of magic on it. Should you turn it on?
Yeah? Let's see what it does. Does it look like it did
anything? Oh? It did something. I can't move the damn thing.
What do you mean, look, I just let Oh it's just hovering there.
Try to move it. Would you look at that? It's immovable.
Okay, I'm gonna turn it off and see what this other thing does.
Ooh, maybe don't point it at me? Sorry? Ready? Yep?
Oh shit, Okay, that was cool. Is that how they put the
illusion over the door the first time? No, that's not an illusion.
When you mean you just hit the door again. Right, that's not an
illusion. The door just turned into the okay, wall, can you turn
it back? I'm trying try better. Would you like to do this?
No, you're good. I'm trying to reverse the command like I did the
first time with the unmovable thing. But it's not working. Maybe there are
charges on it. Maybe it has to recharge. Hmm, there's one last
function here. I'm gonna try it. Yeah. Sure, yeah. It
looks like it requires a magic word to make it function. Magic compans are
always dumb. I don't understand why they always have to be like side dishes
sweet potato pie, twelve gods are okay? Yeah? That hurt like fucker?
What was that? It was a necromancy spell? Who I told you
not to aim it at me? I didn't. The spell just clipped you
clipped me? Who would hate to take a direct hit from that? I
think I messed up the activation. I'm sorry. Well, do you recognize
the spell? Yeah? It's called Finger of deaths Yep. Sure, it
feels like a finger of death, I said. I was sorry. It's
fine, let's just try to find a way out of here. Scene three,
The Warlock, Part three Location somewhere in the illusion nation, the Warlock
and the fighters stand in front of a bound and unconscious illusionist. The illusionist
appears to have no injuries, with the exception of a broken ankle. The
Warlock taps a finger to his chin while pondering the situation. What to do?
What to do? The fighter speaks up, breaking the Warlock's line of
thought. I bet that ankle's going to hurt like a bitch when they wake
up. At least they're not going to be running away anytime soon. True
enough, Are you certain this is the right illusionist? Yeah? Why,
well, they don't look like a high ranking illusionist, to look kind of
ragged. Illusionists use more than magic alone to mask their identities. This is
the right person. Guess that makes sense. The illusion that masked the outpost
here was a very elaborate spellcraft and the finer workings of illusion that hit the
escape route that we blocked off for brand new. So the Warlock had to
a be powerful and be still be present, not tracks, And when I
knocked them out, the other illusions around the area dropped. Ah, it's
the right person. So what are we going to do with them? Ask
them some questions and then bury them, right, Yeah, fantastic. Speaking
of which, has the rest of the outposts been put down? Yeah?
All but the children, we cut them loose as requested. That's good.
A little surprise, to be honest. I didn't think your patron would be
so merciful. Merciful Those children are now orphans. Do you know how many
adults are killed by orphans every year in the illusionation. It's an epidemic.
I had no idea. So let's do you know how many edgy Warlock stories
start with My parents were killed and I'm an orphan on the street. So
I made a deal with the patron to gain the power to avenge my parents
and hunt down that killer. I'm practically recruiting more warlocks as we speak.
I guess that's true. Weren't your parents killed when you were young? I
don't want to talk about my parents. Okay, it was a dark time,
all right, I'm sorry forget I mentioned it. Just grab that bucket
of water and splash it on the illusionless face. It's time we get some
answers. Gladly, good morning, sunshine. What is this where am I?
Oh? God's my ankle? It's like a bitch I called it.
Who are you? Silence? I'll be asking the questions, unless, of
course, you would like me to snap that other ankle. No, I
didn't think. So let's start with your name. My name is Debris.
We have some questions for you, Debris. If you'd answer honestly, we
will let you return to your friends outside. They're tied up and waiting for
you. We don't want to hurt anyone. We just want some information and
then you can be on your way. How do I How do I know
that you're telling the truth? Now? Now, Debris, remember the rules,
No questions or the other ankle goes, breaky, breaky. You're just
gonna have to trust me. Look at that glare. I don't think Debris
is the trusting sort. You'll come around, won't you, Debris? Yes,
wonderful na. Let's start with the basics. Why are you here?
I was helping to guard this outpost and keep it hidden. Did a bit
of a shit job of that, didn't you? Debris? Fuck you?
This is seemingly in the middle of nowhere. There have been and then unusually
high number of wild magic events in this area. We would task to research
and invest Most of the people here scientists they are no danger to you or
your kind? Your kind? What a joke? And what did you find
in your research? Wild magic events are having a large impact on certain areas.
They are creating shock waves with multiple schools of magic. And what do
you intend to do with that knowledge? M Our goal is to design better
ways to contain the events and protect citizens. You mean weaponize the events for
personal gain? No, no, that's not what I mean. It doesn't
matter, debris. My next few questions are going to be very direct,
and I expect honest answers. If you lie, oh no, and you
will be severely punished. Do you understand? Yes? Good? Now?
Where is the Nine Laves Cimita? Honestly, I don't know. Bullshit,
You're starting off on the wrong ankle, my friend. Oh, seriously,
I know what it is. I know it's rumored to be in the illusionation,
but I have never seen it, and I do not know anyone that
has. As far as I know, it's just a myth. And the
Journal of Teana Crestfallen another myth. You must really hate the ability to walk,
truly, I don't know. They're just toys. As far as I
know, the illusionists do not have them. Those stories say that an illusionist
wheels the blade and carries the book. Seems like you would have a little
bit more information than I swear. I know nothing about the book and blade.
Well, let's talk about something. You do know. Where's the forsaken
city? That the what? Do not make us repeat ourselves? It's one
of my least favorite things to do. I don't know of any forsaken city.
How illusion is, debree, I will find your secret city. If
I have to tear down every village, outposts and farming community along the way,
I will. I will watch this nation burn to the ground, and
I will spit on the grave of every citizen that has the misfortune of being
in my path. So tell me what I want to know and lessen the
carnage. There is no forsaken city. You have been misinformed. Well,
it looks like we have to do this the hard way again. Unfortunately we
do not have time for any additional questioning. Kill them all and we will
begin again at the next outpost. No, wait, okay, okay,
whatever you want to me. Just let the others live. Why would we
do that? Ill, I'll tell you where to find the forsaken city.
Well, friends, The first three Warlock scenes are all finished, but we
have three more, which we will get to right after these messages and we're
back. Here's the last three scenes. Hope you enjoy the Warlock Part four.
Location somewhere in the Illusion Nation. I'm still not gonna tell you where
yet. The Warlock and the Fighter sit next to each other during the party's
camp. The Thief sits on the opposite side of the fire and tells a
story to the Artificer and the Bard while the tracker is out patrolling the perimeter.
From the outside, one might think the camp looks light hearted and pleasant,
but upon closer inspection, anyone could see that every person in the camp
was nervous. Are you sure this is gonna work? As sure as that
can be. I don't like it. We're too exposed. We are meant
to be exposed. How else would they see us? You know, I
know that you think there are druids out here, but what if there aren't?
What if we get hit by a demon pack or something. That's why
I have you here to protect me. Very funny. Look. We talked
about this and we both agreed that we needed someone to vouch for us.
This is the safest idea that I have unless you have something better. No,
I don't, but I still don't have to like it. Quit scollon
and put a smile on. We're supposed to look like we're having a good
time. I am smiling. That is not a smile. You look constipated.
Here is the stutter. God's no, don't you know how to smile?
I do. I smile a lot. I smile after I've been drinking,
fighting, or fucking, and right now I'm not doing any of the
above. You're impossible. How long do we have to wait? Hush?
Look over there? Where? What is it there? It looks like an
emu? What the fuck is an It's a big, flatless bird. They're
fast and me like a penguin? What? No, not like a penguin.
I don't have your night vision walls. How am I supposed to know
penguins aren't? Never mind? Look right there, it's coming near us.
Oh, I think I see it now. That looks nothing like a penguin.
I know. Then, why did you describe a penguin? Be quiet?
There are two more. Don't be annoyed with me. You don't even
know what a penguin looks like. Hello there, Yes, I see you.
Would you like to join our fire? We have plenty of hot pockets.
Are they coming? It looks like it. Tell them we have wine
too. We have wine as well. Would you like a glass? Tell
them it's red wine. Shut up, they're coming. You don't have to
stay in your shape shift form if you don't want to. We know that
you're druids. You can stay in the shape shift form. That's cool too.
Maybe they just really like being EMUs. We are heading up to the
Brimmere Dam, going to head back to the Forsaken city for a bit.
Which way are you traveling? Hmm? Are they really gonna stay EMUs this
whole time? That seems a little rude. That's okay. You can stay
EMUs. Help yourself to the hot pockets. They're nice and hot. Are
you sure they're drewid sh Anyways, we're heading to Brnmeier and we have a
report of a demon attack, a whole pack of them. I was thinking
it might be a good idea to group up with some other travelers and make
our way up there. Yeah, demons are less likely to attack if there's
a group of us. We can't shape shift or anything, but we are
capable warriors, and we have plenty of food, so you won't go hungry.
Druids don't have to eat. They eat because they like the flavor.
I think she means that we have some tasty food that you'd probably lack.
Those are the barbecue pineapple hot pockets. They're all the craze lately. Yeah,
I'm pretty certain those are just EMUs. Hush. I mean, they're
not responding and they're just drinking all the wine. Ignore her. So what
do you say? Would you lack to team up and head to the dam?
You wash her backs and we'll watch yours. I think that one is
shitting on your bedrooll. God's damn it. You're right. They're just EMUs.
I told you I hate this nation me too, stupid penguins. We'll
try again tomorrow night. There's gotta be some druids nearby. Yeah, we
will try again. Uh, good luck with the bedrooll. I can't stand
you. Well, I'm going to bed now, good night, good night.
Excuse me? Did you say you were at it up to bring my
James Forge? You scared the nine hells out of me? Sorry about that.
I noticed you were chatting with those amus friends of yours. Nah,
they're just EMUs. Emails are our songs. Oh, but I will accompany
your party to brimmar Dan if you will accept the company with me and my
friends, we most certainly will. The Warlock Part five location Lisa's Hold.
With a beaming grin, the fighter saunters up, holding a jug of need
in her left hand. She had just finished scouting out the town of Lisa's
Hold and has nothing but good news. I come bearing gift. I'll only
see one gift unless you're hiding something. Well. I've gotten need and great
news. Which one do you want first? The news? Please? Of
course you do, Nerd. Are we alone? Is it safe? Yeah,
it's just us. The druids said they didn't want to go into the
town. They're shifting and going into the forest for a spider hunt. That
sounds like a terrible idea. They do know that some of the spiders as
big as houses, right, Spiders that size are only in the deep parts
of the forest. The druids are probably fine if they stick to the tree
line. We did all that work to find them. I would hate to
lose them over something dumb. We just need one or two to make it
back. The others are disposable. True enough, Now what's the news.
There's actually a bunch of good news. First, there's plenty of room in
the inn for us to stay, and it's pretty cheap too. That's good.
Second, there are two low grade illusionists stationed in this town. That
isn't good news. That's specifically bad news. You didn't let me finish.
The illusionists are stationed in town, but they recently left to help escort a
merchant to the next stop. Because of roving packs of demons. They decided
it would be best to help the merchants and let them town defend itself.
And you're certain it's not a trap. Remember how I said they were low
grade. They're not strong enough to maintain any large illusions and travel. At
the same time, they're gone, and the city is defenseless, at least
in the magical sense. Lisa's Hole does have a small contingency of guards,
but they're not going to be a hassle. We aren't here to fight.
We're here to sleep and then be on our way. I know, I
know, but hear me out. What if we could cause a little bit
of chaos and no one would have any clue it was us. You know,
I'm always down for a bit of chaos. It's practically my middle name.
What do you have in mind? Well, we already dropped the sphinx
off at that port town grasp. Yeah, and the suspension bridge figurine that
we left next to the Nine Hells portal. Yeah. Well, I think
we should put the silver chime here. No, the silver Chime isn't ready.
Oh but that's my last fitt of great news. The artificer says that
it's ready. Apparently they were able to expedite the charging process and now it's
good to go. It seems like a waste to use something like that here.
Why because these people aren't important, they're nobodies. And I want to
use the silver Chime in a bigger city. But do you really think you'll
be able to use that in a city without an illusionist finding it right away?
I mean it will be wasted. They will track it and find it
before it has time to do any impact. I guess that's probably true here
there are no magicians, and if you activate it today, I bet it'll
fuck this place up before the illusionists get back. Hmm. And even if
they did come back early, they're low grade. They probably don't even have
detection rods. Now you're getting it, and we are getting closer to the
Hidden City. Maybe they'll even send out some of the heavier illusionists just as
we're arriving. Day. I didn't even think about that, but yeah,
you're probably right, and less magicians in the Forsaken City is a good thing.
Okay, I'm starting to think you're right. I know you wanted to
set it up in a bigger city and watch the people go mad, but
I think it'll be more successful here. I agree. All right, let's
do it before the Druids get back from their hunt. This is all awesome.
I'm super excited. Don't be too excited. We'll be long gone by
the time that people here really start going at it, I know, but
I bet we will hear about it when we get to the Forsaken City.
Go get the silver chime from the Artificer. We'll stay at the end tonight,
have a hot meal, activate the trinket, and be gone by morning.
I'm on it. This is going to be so much fun and nice
work. I probably don't say that enough, but this was a good job.
Hey, thanks, I appreciate that. Now go get the trinket.
We'll do. Oh one last thing, Yeah, leave the meat. The
Warlock Part six location the high Illusionist Vault in the Forsaken City. Fires burned
throughout the high Illusionist's fault. The fighter shifted her eyes from a nearby blaze
down to the sword that lay on the ground just a few feet away.
It was her sword, her double edged beauty, her own Little Abigail the
Wanderer. Abigail Abby for short, had been with her since her teenage years.
She had stolen it from a heavily intoxicated mercenary after he tried to take
advantage of her. The asshole had tripped over his own feet and collapsed to
the ground in a drunken stupor. She had quickly relieved him of his weapon,
fearing he would come back to his senses and make good on his threat.
When she saw that he would not be putting up a fight anytime soon,
she decided to give him his sword back several times in his chest.
Since that day, Abby had never left her side. Most nights she slept
with Abby tucked beside her. It was her most beloved friend in the whole
world. For many years, Abby was her only friend until she met the
warlock, a man named Heaven. Heaven was kind and gave her work.
They were friends, and they traveled together for years. She trusted him,
at least she thought she did. Now she was trapped in a burning room
filled with illusionous treasure and dead men. Footsteps came from behind her. She
was still as a statue as Heaven stepped out from the darkness and into view.
He tucked a beautiful magic scroll into his satchel, then stepped over her
double edged sword, her beautiful abbey. Hello star Heaven, what's going on?
Why can't I move? You can't move because I hast to spell on
you. But you already knew that, didn't you. The whole person is
a dreadful incantation, sickeningly useful. I I don't understand, Sure you do.
You just don't want to admit it. You can't admit it. Heaven,
where is everyone? Everyone is dead. It's just you and me,
the way it was always meant to be. They're dead. Yes, the
sunshine and ray went down in flames. Dust had an amulet that protected him
from fire, so I was forced to use acid. It was messy,
to say the least, how could you? They were our friends, they
hit were, yes, but what we are doing is so much bigger than
them. I could not have anything time me back to Anthronoxus. They wouldn't
have said anything. They would have died without saying a word to anyone about
what we did here. I know, and I made sure that they did
die without saying a word. He wrote a moulster. I never claimed to
be anything less. Is the page really worth it? Worth all this?
This and so much more? These magicians have no idea what power they hold
or how to wield it. They don't deserve these abilities. I will rip
the power away from them and bring them to their knees. One by one,
these nations will fall, and Anthronoxus will lead the Warlocks to their rifle
place. As the leaders of Euphray. Scholastic nations will never allow that.
You have to see the Unetti gifst you and destroy you before you could ever
truly challenge them. Oh star, that's where you're wrong. They have begun
to war upon themselves. Tensions have been building for decades, and it has
finally reached its spoiling point. What do you mean? The scholastic wars have
begun and warlocks will be on top when the dust settles. Then take me
with you. We are friends. Let me fight beside you. I wish
I could, but Anthonoxist has seen your destiny. If I don't do this
now, you will kill me in the future. I would never you will,
though, this is the future that my patron has seen. You and
I leave this place, and shortly after we fight a group of illusionists led
by a man named Eddie Falso we defeat them. However, during combat,
I drop the infinite page of illusion. Despite my warnings, you pick up
the scroll. The power overtakes you, It consumes you, and you use
it to destroy me. No, I won't pick it up. You can
keep it. I won't touch it. You were faded to say that the
only way to break that future is to make certain you're not a part of
it. What future happens if I'm not there? What happens if I'm dead?
I don't know. Anthroknoxists only solve the one path. So maybe you
fight them and lose. Have you thought about that? And maybe escape without
ever coming into contact with them, and so risk I'll have to take.
Please don't do this. I'm sorry. To Star. This is the way
it has to be. I will make it quick and I'll use this blade
instead up at peace. Goodbye Star. Hey everyone that is gonna do it
for our Warlock and Fighter little mini series NPC interludes that we did. I
hope you enjoyed it. We have a blast doing things like these. These
uh are not always so emotional at the end. Most of them are just
funny and silly, you know, fits the theme of the show. But
I wanted to give you a bit of a taste and what happened throughout the
season kind of in the background, and I genuinely hope you enjoyed it.
We are wrapping up season seven right now, and season eight is right around
the corner. We're gonna take a little bit of time off to kick back
and relax for a little bit before diving back in. But we appreciate everyone
that has listened this far. I mean season seven. That's a lot of
episodes and a lot of time put into the show. So thank you everyone
that has listened. Thank you to all of our patron subscribers, both with
your financial support and your moral support, you definitely make this possible. And
a very special thank you to our two executive producers on Patreon, Nick Mead
and Patrick t Arsenal, and that's gonna be it for us tonight. So
remember, be safe, we love you all, and stay foolish.