This it's the two seventeen Recovery Podcast with Corey Winfield. No, but you
gotta laugh and you gotta have fun in recovery. That's what we do here.
The most Adam Stevens possibilities nowadays. I mean everything's a possibility to me
nowadays. With everything going on, I don't think how you can rule anything
out. And Mitchell old Brian the person I had with me was a felon
and I didn't know I couldn't have my own guns in the trunk. Well,
no you can't. It is the eleventh of December twenty twenty three.
My name is Corey Winfield and as you heard, I'm joined by two guests.
I'm joined by Adam Stevens. How are you Adam Dingdon and Mitchell O'Brien.
Mitchell, how are you fabulous? Nice? And need it? Yeah,
we are missing fabulous in this podcast. Just to burk but we all
took a little trip today. We went down to Grand Rapids. Do you
have to think about that? Trip was fun? It was it was good.
I liked it. It was a lot more fun on the way there.
I think, well we did the it was good. The little not
karaoke, but request song requests, and then actually getting to check out what
we got to check out was was good. I liked it. You know,
we'll talk about touring. Guiding Light is where we went in Grand Rapids.
We'll talk about that in just a second. But first, what brought
on the game of playing DJ? I don't remember. I don't either.
I think you just asked. I think you just asked us out of the
blue, maybe just the second time. The second topic came from what we
were doing. Yeah, yeah, we had we were doing the I thought,
yeah, I thought you were just there all of a sudden like hey,
let's do this. And then all of a sudden Adam did a recovery
song and then whoa, actually both it was a transition because it was both.
Yeah. No, I think it was justin that said let's play this
game, because clearly me as the boss man, would never do this.
This probably is illegal, and I don't know, but somehow it was like
sum up your love life or your sex life or something like that in a
song, describe your sex life in a song. And then I know we
started with here we go again on my own, there's one before that?
Which one was the one before that? I think that was Justin's first one.
That was Hurricane. It just beat it and then it got two Mysterious
Ways by you two and then enter Sandman the Metallica and then it went Rolling
Stones. No, I didn't go to the Stones yet. What was Justin's
second Yeah, hmmm, it wasn't Man Eater. They all know it wasn't
that song. I can't remember, so I thought the first one was that
it's been a while now that's stained. I think that was the joke you
started it all. Hmmm, yeah, because I did throw a stain joke
out there about something. But I can't remember a second one. I feel
like it was a song that I didn't know, like like I don't know
why rap or whatever something some but I prevail or that was a recovery song.
Yeah, that was a recovery song. Yeah, well, sorry,
Justin, we weren't paying attention to your sex life that much. But then
yeah, then it went to you can't always get what you want, and
then it was supposed to be either crazy or amazing by Aerosmith, and then
we went amazing and then you were like, that's actually my recovery song too.
You know, it's a good one. And when you said that,
I was like, Okay, let's listen, because I don't think I've ever
listened to that song with that in mind. And I did, and I
was like, dude, that's clearly a song they that Steven Tyler wrote about
recovery. Yeah, and that's how I felt the first time too, because
I as a kid listening to it all the time, you just think it's
about relationships or some kind of love or whatever, and yeah, it just
adds up perfectly whatever trifling they had in the video with him. You know,
it's like, okay, because I love it with some of the videos
for that, but yeah, if you actually listen to the song, you're
just like, whoa, that's what he's That's definitely what he's talking about,
right. And that's the thing when it says when when the moment arrives and
you know you'll be all right, it's like I get teary every time,
you know, like because that moment. I think a lot of us can
think of moments like that where it's just like a turn, you know,
and yeah, feeling solid about stuff and yeah, but we go so long
thinking that's never gonna happen. It's never gonna happen, and we've tried so
many times and different ways, and then when it does click and it turns
yeah, it is amazing and you're just like, oh my god, it
finally happened. Yeah, like having certain things happened in your life for the
first time, like yeah, going to the dentist, not going to die
a virgin. That was about sex, Mitch, let's talking about sex.
I almost got beat up by this kid for snoring, but I was like
four times the size, so I mean, yeah, all right, Mitch,
thanks for that. I didn't have anything to do with talking about stuff,
and it's not really pertinent. I was born with mine, but I'm
I can identify it now, Okay, mit, that's great. Anything else,
I watered all of the plants, all of it. Okay, Okay,
we get it, buddy. Anything else, you're good, I'm good,
Okay good. So yeah, so that became kind of fun though.
It was, you know, just some goofiness on our way down there,
and then turned into recovery stuff on the way down there, which was really
good and we were all kind of on the same page. We get to
Grand Rapids, which apparently they want you to pay for parking, but they
don't want you to pay for parking. It's such a dilemma. We're down
there on Division Street and they have these little what do you call them meters?
Yeah, parking meter, parking stick or something that you park next too,
and it has a number on it, and there's like download the app.
So we download the app and put all the stuff in. It's like,
payment doesn't work. I'm like, oh, it's because it's run credit
card. Put another one in. Payment doesn't work, do another one even
Apple pay payment doesn't work. Let's just go to the freaking meter thing and
pay. So we go to the meter, which is about a block or
two down. It's forever, it'll walk, and we get to this stupid
meter thing and put in all the stuff. Credit card. Nope, it's
not even moving. It's not saying take your card and removie card. Put
it back in harder, deeper, faster, slower. It's saying nothing.
And so we try again with a different card. Nothing. And then I'm
like, well, I'm afraid to even put cash in this thing. And
then I think Mitch or Justin one of you guys said, oh, well,
it doesn't take cash. It only takes coins, and really people just
walk around Grand Rapids. Apparently people walking around Grand Rapids are not walking around
driving around. They just driving around with coins. And I was just I
was willing to take the ticket and fight them. I will. I will
fight somebody over something that's wrong, and I'll gladly mail them their three dollars
and fifteen cents. I would have, but I'm not going to take a
ticket for that. I couldn't do it. Not when you're shit ain't working.
There's probably a camera of the cot you try and oh yeah, I'm
sure there was. I surprise you guys weren't filming it. You should have.
I did that in that mode. I did that in Travers last winter.
I tried to stop and see my brother at the guitar shop and I
went in and I tried to at the meter, tried to use the card
thing. It's like flip it around. I'm like, okay, well i'll
put it in wrong, so do it again, and it's like flip it
around. I'm like wait. So I literally did it every single way.
My card would go in there backwards, forwards, every single way, and
then it just wouldn't work. So I was like, okay, I'm gonna
start this process again while I record it. Then I'm gonna not pay,
and if I get a ticket, I'm gonna I'm gonna fight it. And
I didn't get a ticket. Yeah, they're gonna tell me, but I
don't know. But we get in there and we go into gutting Light.
We're a little early, I think, earlier than they expected us. But
it was fine, better early than late, right, And so they tell
me that I can park in their back lot things. So I did.
So we didn't get a ticket or anything, but we go in there and
we met with Seth and Dan. They kind of took us around and showed
us half of the facility before lunch, and then they invited us to eat
lunch with them, and it was grilled cheese and tomato, soup, salad.
You know, it was decent lunch. Justin enjoyed it. I didn't
eat mine very much because I was talking way too much. I started doing
that I realized everyone else was done, and I was like, Okay,
I'm gonna gotta finish this here yourself. But no, they prepared the guys
to go, hey, look, you know we're going to put a guest
sticker or tab or name plate whatever next to them, and I guess they
said, hey, these two seventeen people are coming down from Travers City and
they're gonna have lunch with you, you know, like thinking of some questions
that you might have for them, and so they were asking me some questions,
you know, and it was it was pretty cool to get to explain
what to seventeen recovery is, what that's all about. Adam. I think
you sat with you know, people that were I'm using air quotes here,
clients and people that are you know, in there and trying to do their
thing. And Mitch, you sat with staff members, two staff members and
a client. Yep. I got to set with I'm going to call him
the intake guy, and so that was pretty cool. Did any of the
tables? Was there only four tables? I think there were more four or
five tables of people at them. Gotcha, there are more tables than that,
but have people at them. It was interesting though, and the questions
that they were asking. And I went through Guiding Light at one point in
my journey, and if you hear my mom tell it, she'd be like,
oh, you hated that place, And of course I did. I
wasn't in the right mindset, you know, and she's like, why would
you ever go to back to that place? And It's like, again,
I was not in the right headspace. And sometimes people will tell you along
the way things you don't want to hear, you know, And that was
huge for me. I didn't want to hear that I was a mama's boy.
You know, I knew I was a mama's boy. You know.
That didn't hurt my feelings or anything. But as I told the people that,
you know, was Seth and Dan that were giving us the tour today,
like if Brian didn't pull me in, you know, to the room
and they were talking to me, and I was like, all right,
I'm out of here. My siatica was going crazy. And that was and
that was something I used to drink a lot, you know, the siatic
pain. I mean, it's bad. Nothing touches it. I don't care
what pills you give me that it's not going to help. I'm just screwed.
And the only way to get to sleep, I thought, was to
just drink myself to sleep. So that was hurting really bad, and I
was kind of worried about it. And I was like man, it doesn't
need to get any worse. But again, I would have used probably any
excuse at that point. And there was another dude in there, and I'm
like, oh, they kicked him out, unfair and I don't know why
they kicked him out, And again that's sound of my business, so I
would use that, like, oh, I didn't like that place, and
they kicked this other guy out who didn't deserve it. I don't know what
was sent to that guy, you know, but the guy did try to
get me to stay. This other guy that ended up getting kicked out,
and he was like, you don't need to leave, you know, just
stick it out. And I was like, dude, the pain is going
down my leg. It's just too much. I can't deal with it.
And then they came out and talked to me, but they pulled me in
this room, you know, and they're like, hey, look, you
know, you know, why are you going to go home? You know,
your mama's boy. You don't like to work out? What are you
doing? And it's like, well, that's not kind of really what happened.
It's my back hurts and I can't really do your crazy military style workout,
you know, and my doctor said that I should walk, and that's
why I went to the walking machine because they were like another thing. They're
like, we're gonna punish you, and you got to clean the bathroom,
right. I was like okay, And for what They're like, well,
because you weren't working out with the guys and you went to do your own
thing. And I was like, wellyahcause I'm not going in there to hurt
my stuff anymore. And he guys paying for my back surgery, I don't
think so I'm just trying to take it easy here. And they're like,
oh, so you're a doctor. I'm like, no, that's what my
doctor told me. He said walking helps it. So that's why I went
to the walking machine. It's not like I just sat in there staring at
chicks or something. But when they, you know, brought me in there
like the Mama's boy thing, I was like, no, there's another guy
in there that I had told that I would help them with, you know,
public speaking and like doing stuff like that, if you you know,
help me with a workout regiment, because I wanted to work out, I
really did, but I just didn't work out there. And he had said,
oh, you're a mama's boy, you know. But I was like,
yeah, I am. But later on, when I was in a
treatment center, and that's the thing about if you're going to treatment centers,
if you're you know, going to multiple if you've relapsed over and over and
you're going to different ones, you know, take a little bit from each
one that you go to because you're going to learn stuff about yourself and you're
going to put it into play later. You might not get it this time,
you might not get it next time. But when I started digging into
okay, what's really wrong with me? When I had a chance to go
to a place and I couldn't leave early, and I'm stuck and I'm in
there, and I'm like, all right, well I'm going to try to
find out what's wrong with me? What is my deal? I got to
dig deep here. And when I started digging deep, I realized, Okay,
abandonment issues, you know, and and stuff like that, and your
issues are your issues. But what I have thought about that, if you
know, I wasn't called the mama's boy or whatever. I don't know,
you know, because I started That's when I atually counted how many treatment centers
I've been to and how many times it's been a treatment that's I kind of
went through my mind each one of them. You know, it kind of
played it back because like if you ever watched Survivor, at the very last
episode, they'll go through and they'll go to everybody who's got their torches snuffed
out, and they'll be like, oh, remember this guy, we liked
him, Like yeah, you like them so much you voted his ass out
first, But yeah, that's real cool. But it was kind of like
that, like going through each one, like okay, this one, that
one, this one, that one, this one, and you know,
looking back at it, I think gotting light it was it would have been
a good thing for me. I don't I don't know how it would have
ben if my sat I couldn't act up, because that really was a huge
I was like ninety eight percent of it, And like I said, any
excuse I would have used, but that one was kind of a big deal
and I really didn't want to go through all that pain again. And it
did look like the working out was a big part of what they do.
So yeah, I mean, you know, most places you go there's a
gem and you use it if you want but yeah, this place, you
know, that's part of the regimen, so yeah, it was kind of
required that you're going there. And it was a crazy you know, it
was. It was a crazy workout. You know. It was like one
of those CrossFit things or you're jumping up, down, up now, grab
the ball, roll around, flip back over and I'm like, I can't
move because my back and they're like, you should have put that under your
intake thing. I'm like, I did. I told you about it.
I upfront about that, like real clear about that. Because anybody was sadic
pain, they know, man, when it goes down your leg, like,
and it was starting to creep down, and it's like, man,
when it goes down the leg, it's I had just constant pain. And
then before for it was like six to nine months. I can't remember which
one it was. I mean, I know there's a huge difference there,
but it was it was just pain, constant, not going away, and
I was doing physical therapy all that stuff, and nothing really helped it.
But you had to have it start going down your leg. It's like,
no way, I got to go. But I think what kind of like
does though, is huge for people in recovery. It's a program that they
get. They're funded first of all with private donations, you know, and
that and I want to say opens the door to a lot more, but
I don't want to offend other treatment centers. But there's stuff that they can
do. They's stuff that they don't have to do. You know. It's
kind of like, here's our program, this is what we're going to do.
The community is behind us. They agree with it. They like what
we're doing. We're going to keep doing this, and no one's going to
tell them no, you know, no one's going to say you can't take
those guys and change their lives. You can't do this for eight months,
you know. Their their program starts out with we'll just say it's a back
in my day, it was two weeks. It took me, but they
say it's three to five day process where people are kind of upfront in the
building. They're not really a part of the program yet, but they're they're
allowed to kind of check it out from AFAR to say are you going to
commit to this? Because that's what they really want you to commit to it.
And if it all works out and you go to the back, they
call it and you're actually in the program. It's a four month program where
you're working on yourself. You're not allowed to get a job. So is
this something that's gonna be cool with you? You know, like these are
the restrictions. And yes, you get phone calls and you can talk to
family and stuff like that, but for the most part, you're working on
yourself. And that's four months long. I mean, that's four months,
you know. Most treatment centers are like, hey, ninety days. This
is four months right after bat just working on yourself. And then after that
you can go get a job after four months, after you kind of graduate
the program, but you can still stay there and they're going to keep your
money. They say that they'll give you what you need to live on,
you know whatever allow once, but they're going to keep the rest of your
money for you. And then you can stay there another four months, you
know, up to eight months. So you're saving four months, saving money
and around people in recovery and people that are doing it. And then they
have what they call the Iron House, which is their transitional housing sober living,
and someone call it and then you can go there and you have a
roommate and you can stay there, he said. Some people have been there
for a year and a half. But it's cheaper than normal, you know,
but so you're still around recovery. It's affordable, you know. They
want you to accomplish goals and you work on that in the first four months
too. It's like what do you want to do, Where do you want
to be? Where do you want to go? If you say, hey,
I want to be an architect and then you start we're going to McDonald,
they're going to say this isn't lining up with your goals, but like,
shouldn't you be going back to school? And I don't know that's a
way drastic example, but that's the stuff that they're going to say, Like,
don't be sitting here saying you're going to fly airplanes and then you go
get a job and you're a grave digger. You know, they're going to
put you in the right situations and they're going to question you when you're making
stuff that's not aligning up with what you're saying, which I think is very
important and for some people it's real hard because they're going to want to do
what they want to do in do do do what you guys know as well
as I know, doing what we want to do, and our active addiction
was it wasn't working out very well. But at the same time, we
don't have to have goals and we still have to do what we want to
do. You know, Like if I to listen to people tell me the
stuff that I could or couldn't do, I wouldn't be here right now doing
this, you know. So I was still chasing my dream. Oh,
Corey did it his way, not really, I mean I did, but
I didn't you know, I was following the rules and I was going after
a dream. I was going after something which I didn't even know what it
was at the time. You know, It's like I want to start here
and I want to do this, and you got to start somewhere. But
to say no, I'm going to do it my way. I'm just going
to drink on Fridays, you know, like that way of thinking I had
to let go of. It's And there's a difference too, I think between
the goals that we want to do and doing sobriety our way, doing recovery
our way, Because I know, I think you guys agree with me that
when we tried to figure out recovery our way. It didn't work. It
really didn't. We needed somebody to help us. But when you you get
into that and you start getting the recovery and the sobriety and the substance use
disorder under control, you can start to customize your personal goals and go from
there. You know, yeah, I get that, Yeah, but I
mean someone say though that I didn't mind my way though, fabulous, thanks
Justin, But not like if they like I've had people in AA say oh,
no, you're working the steps and I'm like no, I'm not,
like, yes you, why are you doing all this stuff? And think
okay, well, and I kind of feel like it's it's all the same,
Like if you're gonna do the steps or not do the steps, if
you're working on sobriety and it's working for you, you're doing the things,
but maybe in a different order, maybe a different way. That's why the
multiple pathways things works for people. Is there people who really connect with dharma
groups. If you look into the principles of dharma, the steps are there,
they just word it differently. So it's like what is going to fit
into your brain that is going to be that key that unlocks it for you,
but most of it is pretty much similar stuff, you know, working
on your you know, there's a reason that there's this. There's a spirituality
aspect in most of them, not all of them, but a lot of
them. You know, it's because that really does seem to help people,
you know, making amends and stuff like that. You know, like that
makes you a better person and works on your character and your personality, you
know, the personal inventory. A lot of these different structures have all of
the same things, just that they just word it differently. It, you
know, helps people. I don't know, and then different I think,
but I didn't. I don't know, and like I wasn't trying to,
Like I'm gonna go do my own way. But like I said, some
groups will tell you you're not doing it right, gotta do it this way,
and there's no right way. So there is the right way, but
I just it's different for everybody. For me, it was starting a podcasts
and having goals and dreams and putting together all the things I learned over the
the process of it all, you know, and where I wanted to be
and how I learned that I could make that happen. It was huge,
but I don't know it was. It was a good time though, guiding
light and brought back some memories when they went to that last room where we
used to stay. With the back to work people. They have a back
to work program, which I think would be great. I'd love to start
that here in Traverse City. And it'd be empty, I think, because
it's it's for people who you know, have nowhere else to go, but
who want to rebuild their lives. I'm not saying that there's not people here
in Travers City that don't want to rebuild their lives, but there's work involved,
you know, working on themselves, and I don't know, it'd be
an interesting concept. I'd love to talk to some people about it. Obviously,
it would take you know, funding and funding from not the state,
you know, to do things where they needed to be done. And they
said that COVID kind of took that program from them, you know, when
COVID hit, it was just kind of like, okay, when what are
we doing? And they chose when things open back up to just focus on
recovery, which I think was smart, you know, because when you try
to be too many things to too many different people, you just kind of
get things lost in the shuffle, and they're talking about opening a women's house
or not a women's house, but a women's program down there too, which
I think would be awesome. And they already have transitional housing for women in
Grand Rapids or do we have all those flyers and stuff. But Guiding Light
they have a website you can check out more about them. But it was
it was really cool to kind of go back to a place where I was
before and you know, kind of get the tour and to show you guys
like, hey, like these places are out there, Like how cool is
this that it's free for people to go through It doesn't matter well insurance and
it doesn't matter if you have insurance or don't have insurance, like it's it's
free to you. It's it's a program that's you know, just strictly funded
off donations, which is great. And that blew me away, Like I
didn't I didn't realize that stuff existed that you know, me go to treatment
for free, I mean without insurance and right, and but yeah, it's
that program there. I think about my journey or whatever, and man,
I don't know, I think I think everybody's in a little bit of different
situations, but there's there's a lot of situations where it'd be really good to
just I mean, I remember when I was at Bear River. It was
my second rehab, but the first one I was only there for like two
weeks. And when I first got there, my roommate said, h sure,
don't put that there right, you know? It was oh that sorry,
yep, yeah, he said, you know, oh, this is
your this is pretty much your first time. You should probably stay for ninety
days. And I was like, whoa, you know you hear that ninety
days? And I had just got it through my head that I was definitely
staying the thirty That's what I'm doing. And I was proud of that mentality.
But that's why when we were there, I said something like that's what
third thing is, you know, not like nothing against anything else, but
you know, they they got it like a program that you work through like
that that I don't know is it's just I really like the the way they
went about it, and I guess, yeah, in the state will put
a cap on how much they're going to pay for like if someone's on Medicaid,
you know, and it's all based on your insurance too, like even
if you have insurance like our insurance like as a cap, oh, you
can go. They will pay for these many days. And you're like,
okay, I guess, but I mean, are you going to be where
you need to be when you leave? Probably not. That's why people go
back again. But with medicaid, they'll do the same. They'll say,
Okay, we'll fund this person to stay two weeks. And depending on how
this is how great Michigan is. There's ten different regions, So whatever region
you just happen to live in, depending on the drug problem in that area,
determines how much funding they get and how much funding that they'll be able
to spend on you to go. So some regions like, no, we'll
only spend two weeks there, and then some regions are like wow, because
you actually charge more for like so if you're going to go to a place
Adam for three months, well, the Trea Lin Center is not really like
that because there's a different rate. So for the first ninety or for the
first thirty days, it's this rate, for the second thirty days it's lower,
So they're going to want you to leave, you know. And there's
some which there's a place in Michigan. That's like they're in a two week
rotation where it's we can't have a You're not hardly going to learn anything in
two weeks, And it's like, what are they getting out of that like
that they can just turn them out, Like it's just it's not how treatment
works. If I had a guess, like it's it's very successful in getting
your some of your family off your back early on or something. I mean,
because two weeks you're not going to learn anything. Like two weeks you
might start feeling a little better. Yeah, and You're just doesn't make a
lot of sense to me. And I wish we'd stop wasting money on that,
you know, and just put people in at least for thirty days.
I mean it was up to me. I put everybody in for ninety but
that freaks a lot of people out, and then people wouldn't go. But
at least give the an option, you know. I mean, like I
said, I was the king of leaving early, like after a week and
I got it, let's go. I figured it out. Now I'm gonna
be changed and then fallow my face and oh no, I'll do it like
this. But I had to learn all those things, but man to have
had a chance to go for ninety and actually stick it out and stay for
it. It it's hard for people. You can start making excuses, well
in my house, my car payment, this and that, and eventually I
lose the house and lose the car, so like I didn't really have anything
else at that point. Well, and I think that's why gutting Light does
their process in the beginning, which I thought was really cool, because yes,
it doesn't really matter what your insurance is, it doesn't matter if you
can pay for it, it doesn't matter any of that. But they want
to make sure that the people are going through there, mean it. That's
what I was going to say too. That's that's a real big difference at
the rehabs. I mean that would be huge. Sorry, no, no,
no, no, that's fine because that's one thing. When they told
me their their program and how long it was, it clicked in my head,
how long kind of the recovery process to get it really going happened for
me and I didn't get to do it in a treatment facility, but I
was like, that's the timeframe I remember it. That's how it worked in
my head, That's how how from that that last drink and then getting into
you know, and for me it was vivatrial shots and counseling, but getting
into that line just really how long it took me to start processing things different
and to actually take it over as my own, you know, my own
program. And so that was exciting to me. And then, like you
guys said, I don't want to really bash anybody, but then the two
week program was popped off in my head and I'm like, the word worthless
kind of jumped into my head. I was like, this is so much
better than that, so much better, and it's just structured so much better.
I just really liked it. Yeah, And I think, you know,
with the length of it and everything. That's what I realized is I
think I wouldn't change any of my journey, but I kind of wish early
on I would have realized that the more I just dive into it and just
some submerge myself and recovery, just that's my life now for a while.
I mean that would have been I mean that that's what you kind of have
to do anyway. You know, Well, we can take that from the
visit that we did today too, and to tell people like Hey, I
know this really amazing program that can restructure everything that really works for people,
but you gotta want it. Yeah, and there's some people that it's just
perfect for too, because that's the thing is there's a lot of guys that
want it, and that about you know, a few months just you know,
and it was myself a few times. You get you know, I
get four or five, eight months or something, and it's just where am
I going from here? Where am I going from here? You know what
I mean? And it's that four direction. If you lose that pace,
you know, but that kind of structure, Man's that'd be huge for some
people, especially the young guys because you know, there's probably a lot of
more young guys that rehab nowadays than there used to be too. You know.
Yeah, there's a guy who I told to go there, and I
don't know if he listens to the podcast, but if he's listening, yep,
I'm talking about you, but I don'tim. I was like, go
there. You know, I told his families same thing, like this is
where I think this person needs to go and Nope, I didn't. And
it's one of those things where they want you to relocate there pretty much.
You know. They were saying at Gotting Light, like we don't want people
to come in here, do their four months and then jet back to Detroit
and bote right back to the same thing that they were in, because guess
what's gonna happen. They're going to fall in line with the same things they
did before, but like to start anew you know. And this person that
I was like, dude, this is the place you should go. Yeah,
nah, I don't want to do that. I'm like, well,
I don't know if that person would have made it anyway, but it would
be set up for them to win and not fail. You know, they
would be in a different area, nobody knows who they are. They're starting
over, They're they're rebuilding their life somewhere new with opportunities for them instead of
like, let me go back to the place is where maybe I have burned
some bridges or or whatever, you know. And then sometimes it's hard to
commit to going that long because well, I want to do what I want
to do, and that's too long and I don't need to do I need
to go make some money because I want a house and a boat. And
we never think we're going to go back out either, right, you know,
so that's that's you know, yeah, I'm gonna do it my way,
you know, And it got me light. They do the abstinence,
you know, like I'm gonna smoke weed because my doctor said. So they're
gonna say then you should go smoke weed over there because we don't play that
really, you know, but my doctor said, and they're like, yeah,
that's cool, Like nothing against your doctor, but you can go on
now. Well that's a phenomenal thing that I kind of realized about Guiding Light
was that the structure of the time length, you know, their they're program.
It's set up for people so rebuild an entire life pretty much. Yeah,
and so many people have hit their rock bottom with the pickaxe and still
try to hold onto stuff. You hear it all the time. You hear
it at some meetings that we go do outside of here, you hear it
with people that come in here and talk, and it's just like you you
need a total restructure, you really do. And that's what they're offering people.
And I think that's why they're selective with who they let in, because
you know, there's we know how valuable resources and funding is and so they're
just they're treating it that way. But you know it's I wish I would
have known about it. I would have tried to get in there. I
really would have. You know, there was someone last week what that means
you have to get all up in it. But there was someone last week
that said something to me about I just want to go back to my old
life. And I like the person that said, why that's gone? Got
you right here? Like the old life? Why would you want to go
back to that? And it's not like it was so great, you know,
like or when people somebody goes, I've lost everything, I've lost everybody,
and then seeing a program like today, I want to look at those
people and go, great, here let me show you the starting line.
You know. That's kind of what I got from today, is here's an
awesome starting line for somebody who has burned their life to the ground. You
know. Well, let's you know, and I've you know, speaking my
journey specifically, you know, I've had to I've kind of looked at a
lot of you know, if you have you know, kids or people back
home that you you know, you can't just start a whole new kick everyone
out of your life. You know, that's kind of the mentality at rehab
is you need all new people in your life, and it's like, oh,
well what about my kids? You know what I mean? And so
but I always said that, you know, just in body listening, that's
a huge benefit if you're if you're at a point where you just need to
start over and everything, it's a perfect way to do it and you don't
have anything holding you back. I I think I would have dove a lot
more into it if I wasn't thinking about home all the time. You know.
That helped me up for a long time, and I really had to.
I mean when I when this all started working for me is when I
did decide, you know, I went to sober living, I'm starting my
own routine, and it was about it was about what I was doing,
you know, and it started figuring things out. Stop doing what you're really
what you wanted to do, and started doing the things you needed to do
because none of us wanted to go and sober living, you know, but
get to that point where it's like, all right, well I'm gonna go
do this, and then he realized, okay, cool. I experienced that,
and yes, I did learn how to stop at a routine and learned
to live sober. But we don't want to live with a bunch of dudes
anyway, you know, like that that's not what we want to do.
So and it's it's not a permanent thing either. You know. Some people
are like, I don't want to do that. Well it's not forever,
man. Yeah, And it's a nice opportunity. It's really all you guys,
you know. Yeah, it's not bad. It's not tortured at all.
It's it's an opportunity. It's a it's a starting line to restructure a
foundation found can't talk foundation to build your life, you know. And I
think if you can look at it that way, which I don't know,
if it's handed to a lot of people like that, like this is a
great restructuring program, Like here you go. Maybe we need to ask different
questions, like you know, when somebody's asking about what treatments unders they should
go to, and just start asking like well, what do you have left?
Yeah, what do you do you have? This? How about your
relationships? Do you have a home? You know, just like all these
different things and if it's zero on all of them, like sounds like this
would work for you. Yeah, good to that. And it's not that
you have to be at that got nothing left point either to go to Guiding
Light. But he said to me, you know, we don't get a
lot of the first timers here. You know. It's like, yeah,
it's it's usually the people that have hit that bottom or you know, have
heard about them or their program. But I think it's I think it's a
good program for people. It's helped a lot of people, and they do
it different, which I think is a good thing actually sometimes and you know,
it's not that they do it different, like they're not they don't have
real therapists or they don't have real you know, drug counselor or stuff like
that. No, they do, you know, they still follow some things,
you know, but they're not mandated to do this or do that,
or you know, keep somebody who's using, or kick somebody out. They
said, they use you know, like if you don't make your bed,
they'll kick you out. You know. It's it's no, oh, you
don't get a pop today. No, it's you're not following the program,
You're not doing the things you need to do. We look at that as
the same as using you know you have to you know, not doing your
chore, not doing something, you gotta do that stuff. And you know,
they hold people accountable and they're not afraid to like, all right,
you got to exit the program, you know, because they know that that
will catch on and that other people are watching and there's other people that are
gonna take it seriously. There's other people that are going to do it right
that need that opportunity. And if you know, you want everybody to get
it, but if you don't take it seriously, you just it takes time,
you know. And yeah, well I see it is such an amazing
resource too, like it weeds out to people who aren't serious that really,
if you really really want it, then you're gonna do whatever it takes.
And that's I think that's why my IOPs that I got into work so well,
because I walked in there and they're like, what's your goal for recovery?
I was like, do whatever you tell me to because I not like
you tell me to pour my heart out to a therapist once a week,
I'm gonna do it. You tell me to try and stand on my head
every other day, I'm gonna do it. Because that's gonna help my recovery.
Everything I'm trying ain't working, and it just it just following their structure
is what helped. I watered all of the plants, all of them,
every single one of them. I like that, and what you totally I
like that. I like that. That drop's never gonna get old. I
was born with mine, but I'm but I can identify it now. Yeah,
I don't even want to know what you were talking about in that drop.
I can't remember. I don't remember saying that that's gonna be used a
lot as well now. But I know Adam's feeling it for Justin in this
meeting tonight and he wants to go get some snacks and get some food,
so we'll wrap it up. But yeah, Guiding Lighte, thank you so
much for allowing us to come. That didn't sound right, allowing us to
visit, and for showing us around, and it was very cool. I
loved it. I love the fact that you guys got to see it.
I'm really happy too, like that's it's just a different I haven't seen that
side of it before, and I just that was really nice to see today.
And the guys were really cool and everything so yeah, very nice and
pleasant and very welcoming voice. And yeah it was awesome. Yeah, so
thanks again Guiding Light. We appreciate it, and keep doing what you're doing.
And if you need resource and anything like that, like I said,
they have a website, just look them up Getting Light. But if you're
like I'm afraid to reach out, you know, then you can hit up
Justin Justin at two seventeen recovery dot com. You can hit Mitch up as
well, Mitchell at two seventeen recovery dot com, Adam at two seventeen recovery
dot com, and Corey at two seventeen recovery dot com, which is on
the website at again to seventeen recovery dot com. Check out our blogs at
two seventeen recovery dot dot blog dot two seventeen recovery dot com slash blog.
Got yeah, all right, until next time, see you see Thanks for
this. Listen to the two seventeen Recovery podcast. We hope you come back
for our next episode.