So this episode, I was switching gears. Last episode was a little more
playful, but it was about memories. This episode is about memories, also
of a different kind. Friends. I'm James add Junior and since fifty plus,
as I reflect on turning fifteen a few months, they started looking back
at some of my life and my fun and things that I did. And
last week was all about the electronics electronical stuff. This week's about friends.
And this month I lost someone very important in my life back in two thousand
and there's a lot of time tiousand and seven I think it before that it
was nineteen. I'm sorry seven nineteen ninety seven because the game has been that
long. But I was so young and losing a friend so young and who
is also young too now an older for him, it's like young same age
was kind of rare and you're like, well, that's kind of and it
sticks with you too. But as you get older and you get into your
forties and it's case fifties and sixties, it's just more common people are gonna
start to go. I've seen over the last four years five years, I've
lost about seven or eight friends. Well, I was really close to that's
an acquaintances too. They're out there too. But I got like some really
close people that I just thought as long as I do. It was after
my brother who passed before that, who was my around my age, and
so like that's a that's another story. It's con simbling, but losing a
friend it really hits differently, right because again you're you're getting ready for parents,
grandparents, older people. But your peers, that's such a thing.
And a lot of us have peers of all ages. I think back to
the age Crisis for example, I had friends my age. Friends are a
lot of friends older, and I would say, I hate to even say
this, but I think ninety percent of my older friends died. I have
a few that are left. You're left over, but I would say ninety
percent of my friends at that time, but who are older than me,
all passed away from ads or complications from it. Now it's a sad time
period. I I have a picture of seven people as well as nine of
us, and I only two of us are left. The other seventies died
and I cannot the picture. There are certain patons I have up that I
cannot get still because just friendships. So then I was asked again, I
was young. I was like nineteen twenty twenty, twenty, twenty twenty,
you know, and when I was young. But I think it almost hits
even harder because you've had some of your life for twenty years, twenty five
years, thirty years. They become family, they become somebody more than just
a friend, and then once you are, you know, a friend,
maybe maybe you don't consider them family family with their friends. They've been in
your life for a long time. It's just like you just they're always you
just do like they're always there. They're there, you know. It's just
that's just how it is. So it's just it's weird when they're not and
you sort of feel your own mortality at the same time. You're like wow,
like they're dying, Like how's my health? What am I doing?
What's going on? Might be the last one left? It's uh, there's
a classic Golden Girls episode about that. What will happen if we all,
you know, people start to die off? We was left and the youngest
isn't always the one to go first over sorry, the oldest is always want
to go first. That's the whole part thing about that too. It's like
I learned at my family where some of the older folks last longer than the
younger folks. Each friendship that I lost cut just cut in, because what
also starts to die is well, first of all dies, there's no future.
Your future just cut off. That's it. We won't see them anymore,
which could mean a cut off, stoppage of traditions you have with them,
certain ways you speak, certain ways you act, some ways you talk,
certain certain things you do together that you want to do with that person
or persons. That could be the ending of that. So you're like mourning
the loss of them physically of course, but we're also learning emotionally but also
socially. That's the thing we don't really to talk about that. It's like
you lose a friend, you lose something socially. Also, the phone calls,
the text, they're going out to eat, they're going shopping as you
do. I mean, like, oh, whatever you guys do together,
the award shows us together, and the movies you go together, like that's
part of your social life and social circle circle dies to you. What was
a friend? That is like kind of the conduit the center of your group
does the group survive. Was that friend always a friend that got you,
guys always together, made sure everybody was in touch, you know, made
sure you kept you get You know, I have some friends, you know
that they just you know, we all love each other. Some friends actually
make the effort to make sure we on this birthday, we all get together,
on this occasion, we meet up. If that person goes, what's
someone saying about slack or we'll just go to nothing. All those things,
I think is are just very important things think about because you just don't know.
So I think that's something that's very it's very very interesting that death or
friend can break down down so many different things in your life and your other
friends' lives. When I'm gonna get into like how they die, because that's
a whole discussion, because I know that that there's the eternal, the eternal
debate of die suddenly or slow death? Which one you know as the friend,
who's who's do you what you? I mean? Isn't more shocking?
Is it harder when someone dies quickly and suddenly all of a sudden, you
either mess, oh my god, they're dead, or if they're sick and
you get a chance to be with them to the end. I don't know.
I don't have any just a rhetorical thing. I think both are hard
in their own ways. But i've as a person who's had both happened.
They don't feel good. They were good, I think. I mean in
the end, you've lost a friend. I mean, that's that's the lesson
there. You lost a friend and also losing friends as you get older fifty
plus, for a lot of people, it's harder to make friends at certain
ages. A lot of us aren't working those jobs together where everybody becomes friends
after work and goes for drinks or going to the bars or clubs. You
get a little older, maybe it's not what you want to do anymore.
You don't do that, you can't do it anymore. What if you have
health issues? You know, all kind of stuff happens when you get older.
Making friends is hard enough, especially if you're in big cities like this
or in rural rural areas. But like, you know, what do you
do if you're losing the friends you have? If you have one friend and
they're gone, what do you do? It's just it's all there's no easy
answer to that either. We're still exploring that as we get older. I'll
stop here. I just wanted to talk about that, and I'm want to
give a shout out to all of my friends who are passed, who I
miss every day and all the time, and I have fond memories with.
I wish you guys were still here. But I'll see you, see I'll
see you. I'll say i'll see you soon, and I want to say
that I'll see you at some point again, will rejoice in being united.
I have fifty plus. Talk to you next time.