WEBVTT 1 00:00:02.120 --> 00:00:16.079 Comedy Central podcast. Hahahaha? What? Tal? What? Tal? What? 2 00:00:16.120 --> 00:00:19.559 Tal? What? Tal? Good night, good Slavic joy. I 3 00:00:19.640 --> 00:00:22.079 ' m Danny, that' s what he calls me here in Madrid, 4 00:00:22.199 --> 00:00:26.039 but when I was little they called me The Prince. It' s not 5 00:00:26.039 --> 00:00:31.199 because I was very handsome, because my parents were cousins and right now my 6 00:00:31.239 --> 00:00:33.719 second monologue for paramon comit is my second Monolatego, the first one got in 7 00:00:33.719 --> 00:00:36.119 a few months ago. It was called death and it was as a journey 8 00:00:36.200 --> 00:00:38.920 for darker and depressing riconies of human existence, not as death and suicide the 9 00:00:38.960 --> 00:00:44.079 forties Latino. I do believe, I think this monologue has created me as 10 00:00:44.119 --> 00:00:46.960 a rare fame, you know as a macabre and dark person and really nothing 11 00:00:46.960 --> 00:00:51.159 further from reality. I' m a very vitalistic guy. I gave it 12 00:00:51.200 --> 00:00:54.759 to my mother. When we were little, my mother always told us every 13 00:00:54.840 --> 00:00:59.479 new day of life is a reason for celebration. Then we found out he 14 00:00:59.479 --> 00:01:08.439 was an alcoholic. But well, hahahahaha, j is hard to figure out 15 00:01:08.480 --> 00:01:11.680 these things. Custa realizes. For example, my father is a lugopath and 16 00:01:11.760 --> 00:01:14.680 I have taken him in secret and we realized because he always eats the fruit 17 00:01:14.719 --> 00:01:19.560 of three in three. It' s like nothing. They' re good 18 00:01:19.560 --> 00:01:22.799 people and my old people are good people. In fact, we have a 19 00:01:22.799 --> 00:01:25.879 tradition of our family that there is always Christmas Eve. We always sit a 20 00:01:25.920 --> 00:01:30.040 poor man at our table, then the man has a terrible time there watching 21 00:01:30.079 --> 00:01:40.120 us stamp and so on. But now to that detail is detail. The 22 00:01:40.120 --> 00:01:41.920 thing is, I want to change the image, I want to change the 23 00:01:41.920 --> 00:01:46.159 image. So I' ve decided that this new monologue is going to be 24 00:01:46.200 --> 00:01:53.000 entirely about love. Oh, how beautiful is love? Right, what is 25 00:01:53.040 --> 00:01:57.879 love? They say love is never saying I' m never sorry, which 26 00:01:57.920 --> 00:02:02.239 is a bitch. If it' s already colander, of course precocious, 27 00:02:02.480 --> 00:02:07.199 because then what do you say. YEAAA. Well, I think if we 28 00:02:07.199 --> 00:02:09.599 ' re going to start doing a little experiment, okay, the girls in 29 00:02:09.599 --> 00:02:12.840 the living room, let' s just imagine that tonight we have a little 30 00:02:12.840 --> 00:02:15.520 bit of a skank. I, who know sometimes happens or have been told, 31 00:02:15.680 --> 00:02:19.840 I like to imagine that if you know you do not break my dream 32 00:02:19.840 --> 00:02:21.960 and come here they are the one with a few drinks brother then you finish 33 00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:23.639 the night, because I do not know how this handsome gentleman in the second 34 00:02:23.639 --> 00:02:27.280 row, for example, what you call yourself the boy of Rojo Sergio. 35 00:02:27.960 --> 00:02:30.360 This wasn' t casual. Sergio. I have told you Sergio, because 36 00:02:30.360 --> 00:02:34.439 I know that he is a regular spectator of true comedy and has fame throughout 37 00:02:34.439 --> 00:02:38.319 the Spanish circuit of being an exceptional lover. It' s like a Greek 38 00:02:38.400 --> 00:02:43.080 sex god out there in sport as in fact, as in fact many of 39 00:02:43.159 --> 00:02:46.159 the girls who come here to Joyslava and Bun come out that another young man 40 00:02:46.240 --> 00:02:49.879 to Vigo is Sergio. But let' s imagine girl, let' s 41 00:02:49.919 --> 00:02:53.240 imagine that tonight you' re going to marry Sergio and incredibly because of these 42 00:02:53.360 --> 00:02:54.120 coincidences that you' re one in a million, we' re not going 43 00:02:54.120 --> 00:02:55.240 to apologize, Sergio. But tonight you don' t have the day. 44 00:02:57.280 --> 00:02:59.159 Tonight, Sergio doesn' t have the day. But isn' t it 45 00:02:59.159 --> 00:03:00.840 that I throw the worst at you or what I' ve thrown into your 46 00:03:00.840 --> 00:03:02.879 life is that tonight, Sergio throws the worst at you? Dust that no 47 00:03:02.919 --> 00:03:06.919 human being cast to another. Never in history. Tonight, that' s 48 00:03:07.039 --> 00:03:08.039 how he does everything wrong, all wrong. Basically, he rides on top, 49 00:03:08.199 --> 00:03:20.560 farts, calls you Mom and cries. We' ve all been there, 50 00:03:20.599 --> 00:03:25.159 Sergio, we' re you, we' re with you, and 51 00:03:25.199 --> 00:03:30.599 there you are, you' ve really been naked next to Sergio' s 52 00:03:30.639 --> 00:03:34.319 heavy body, uh, and sweaty, spending the most alien shame of your 53 00:03:34.400 --> 00:03:37.680 life, waiting at that moment so hard for us guys to tell you that, 54 00:03:37.960 --> 00:03:38.199 because I don' t know what happened to me this time that never 55 00:03:38.199 --> 00:03:45.680 happened to me. But Sergio doesn' t do that. He looks at 56 00:03:45.719 --> 00:03:53.560 your eyes and tells you how you stay. And now the next one says 57 00:03:53.639 --> 00:03:54.080 rock me to, friend and I' m out of here tonight with Sergio, 58 00:03:54.280 --> 00:03:57.319 you tell him, you say without words, without square, that is, 59 00:03:57.560 --> 00:03:58.680 the town was horrible. But I' ll tell you one thing. 60 00:03:58.960 --> 00:04:01.680 That bastard' s got style. Yeah, folks, let' s just 61 00:04:01.680 --> 00:04:03.000 say when we get married when we want to. It' s much better 62 00:04:03.000 --> 00:04:04.280 for me to say. He' s here. I don' t know, 63 00:04:04.400 --> 00:04:08.879 imagine Zapatero, not the last Congress, when they told him about but 64 00:04:08.919 --> 00:04:11.240 this sea that said there was no crisis. Imagine answering with two balls. 65 00:04:11.680 --> 00:04:16.279 Yeaa. It would be like ah good, because don' t you forgive 66 00:04:16.480 --> 00:04:18.639 or let' s say yea you know when you lend or know you have 67 00:04:18.639 --> 00:04:19.519 no idea, but you' re going to try luck and nourish blank. 68 00:04:19.560 --> 00:04:21.759 And but that takes it. He looks at you and says it' s 69 00:04:21.759 --> 00:04:26.920 done. We apologize, not what we have to say and look at you 70 00:04:27.000 --> 00:04:30.319 talk about it. Look, I put a zero on the test, but 71 00:04:30.319 --> 00:04:33.279 a ten on molar. Say come on, you know, when you go 72 00:04:33.319 --> 00:04:34.000 listening to music, not down the street too much to you. Te. 73 00:04:34.120 --> 00:04:36.519 Looks like everyone listens to the music at the same volume as you and you 74 00:04:36.560 --> 00:04:40.240 ' re farting a little bit. You don' t think anyone' s 75 00:04:40.279 --> 00:04:41.600 mad, but an old lady is looking at you, an old woman I 76 00:04:41.600 --> 00:04:44.920 haven' t heard. We apologize to that old bitch. What do we 77 00:04:45.000 --> 00:04:48.759 have to say. Hey, and people will say that guy stinks of success. 78 00:04:50.360 --> 00:04:53.240 Oh, imagine you' re with tomato coming home to your partner. 79 00:04:53.279 --> 00:04:54.839 We get caught in bed. Here we' re going to say this isn 80 00:04:54.839 --> 00:04:58.600 ' t what it looks like, not what we have to say. I 81 00:04:58.680 --> 00:05:03.959 confess I wouldn' t have balls, but uf ah look, look, 82 00:05:04.399 --> 00:05:12.399 look at this delivery, that one or that you' ve come as a 83 00:05:12.399 --> 00:05:14.879 couple, my God. So it' s ye ha ha the burden, 84 00:05:15.879 --> 00:05:18.079 nothing' s gonna be cool. It' s just not how love works. 85 00:05:18.120 --> 00:05:19.720 Not that it' s how it works. For example, my girlfriend 86 00:05:19.720 --> 00:05:24.079 when I met her attracted me a lot. You know right away because it 87 00:05:24.120 --> 00:05:27.759 looks like a teenager. You know what teenagers are like, not always like 88 00:05:27.839 --> 00:05:30.879 a snot of disdain that is this no- go- go- go- 89 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:31.040 go- go- go- go- go- go- go- go 90 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:31.040 - go- go- go- go- go- go- go- 91 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:31.040 go- go- go- go- go- go- go- go 92 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:31.040 - go- go- go- go- go- go- go- 93 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:31.040 go- go- go- go- go- go- go- go 94 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:31.040 - go- go- go- go- go- go- go- 95 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:31.040 go- go- go- go- go- go- go- go 96 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:31.040 - go- go- go- go- go- go- go- 97 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:31.040 go- go- go- go- go- go- go- go 98 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:31.040 - go- go- go- go- go- go- go- 99 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:31.040 go- go- go- go- go- go- go- go 100 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:32.759 - go- go- go- go- go- go. I asked 101 00:05:32.920 --> 00:05:38.839 her about life. Hey, he told me no, I didn' t 102 00:05:41.399 --> 00:05:42.279 talk I could and it didn' t make it easy for me. It 103 00:05:42.319 --> 00:05:43.920 didn' t make it easy for me. In fact, Dani told me 104 00:05:44.639 --> 00:05:46.439 she wouldn' t go out with you or die. But I have a 105 00:05:46.519 --> 00:05:53.720 lot of perseverance and you take out a shovel kisses and you know how I 106 00:05:53.759 --> 00:05:56.519 conquered it friend, you know how I conquered it with love letters. If 107 00:05:56.800 --> 00:05:59.759 you want to conquer a woman, nothing better than to write a love letter 108 00:05:59.800 --> 00:06:04.839 carefully, this can be counterproductive. If you have many spelling faults, because 109 00:06:04.920 --> 00:06:08.839 for a true girl to receive a love letter with faults is like a detail 110 00:06:08.879 --> 00:06:12.639 that is tender but at the same time gruesome. It' s not like 111 00:06:12.680 --> 00:06:14.680 I' m singing your birthday. He' s happy, a bunch of 112 00:06:14.680 --> 00:06:25.319 gangy kids, like it' s okay, but you can shut up freaks 113 00:06:25.360 --> 00:06:26.639 pussy and before there was love trises. You know this. Before in every 114 00:06:26.720 --> 00:06:29.480 culture I had a God of love. God is that a man like Eros 115 00:06:29.920 --> 00:06:32.399 or Eastar Aphrodite is easily recognized, right, because everyone has the name of 116 00:06:32.439 --> 00:06:36.519 Puti Club. Now we don' t have love hyons anymore. We haven 117 00:06:36.519 --> 00:06:39.560 ' t had since love. We have love movies that are also magical. 118 00:06:39.639 --> 00:06:41.920 Not because the tumor movies are these that if you watch it one day on 119 00:06:42.000 --> 00:06:44.720 TV every week it disgusts you, but if you catch it on a Sunday 120 00:06:44.839 --> 00:06:47.360 of hangovers you cry like a bitch, you know it' s like I 121 00:06:47.360 --> 00:06:49.120 don' t know perty Woman. We' ve all seen plati Woman. 122 00:06:49.160 --> 00:06:54.759 True, this entrepreneur does not tell you a prostitute and in the end he 123 00:06:54.800 --> 00:06:58.720 ends up asking for marriage, which is not clear if he does, because 124 00:06:58.800 --> 00:07:10.600 it is very romantic or a cheap one. You know it' s like 125 00:07:10.680 --> 00:07:15.560 uf because we almost made it official. Then it' s Titanic, not 126 00:07:15.560 --> 00:07:16.920 Titanic. A lot of people find it sad titanic because in the end you 127 00:07:17.000 --> 00:07:20.160 know that the boy dies and is left alone. But if you imagine it 128 00:07:20.199 --> 00:07:24.720 ' s the story of a boat that falls in love with an Iceberg, 129 00:07:25.000 --> 00:07:29.279 ends well, they don' t end up together, I just love happy 130 00:07:29.279 --> 00:07:31.279 endings. I adore happy endings. That' s why I give it to 131 00:07:31.639 --> 00:07:43.959 American movies or Chinese hairdressers. Depends, depends on the day. Then there 132 00:07:44.040 --> 00:07:46.399 is another kind of love, which is love for animals. Not recently I 133 00:07:46.480 --> 00:07:48.240 wanted to have a pet. She was a protector here who' s been 134 00:07:48.279 --> 00:07:53.920 proming a protector once. Yeah, it' s something that' s really 135 00:07:53.959 --> 00:07:56.360 nice to do around here, no, but it' s also hard, 136 00:07:56.920 --> 00:08:01.079 right, because of course you have to see all those abandoned faces together, 137 00:08:01.360 --> 00:08:03.319 not those eyes that beg for love. It' s like going into vitic 138 00:08:03.319 --> 00:08:09.439 com you know, it' s like or why here you saw a hug, 139 00:08:09.439 --> 00:08:13.519 a buzz. I don' t know goodbye I' m more of 140 00:08:13.519 --> 00:08:16.319 a dog or a cat. How are more dogs or cats, but here, 141 00:08:16.480 --> 00:08:24.319 on this side and cats. You always had a cat, but I 142 00:08:24.319 --> 00:08:26.519 recognize you' re a shit mascot. I mean, especially when you' 143 00:08:26.519 --> 00:08:28.759 re in love, not because you know, when you' re in love, 144 00:08:30.079 --> 00:08:33.639 it' s meet someone you know and you walk out of the shower 145 00:08:33.720 --> 00:08:35.200 naked and dancing sexy you' re like and suddenly you realize that you' 146 00:08:35.200 --> 00:08:37.720 re not alone at home. If you have a dog, it doesn' 147 00:08:37.759 --> 00:08:39.879 t matter, because the pro is like he doesn' t understand anything, 148 00:08:39.879 --> 00:08:43.159 but he participates. You know how he hears. I don' t know 149 00:08:43.440 --> 00:08:52.320 what' s going on, but it doesn' t look cool. But 150 00:08:54.279 --> 00:08:58.919 if you have a cat, it' s a roll cut, because you 151 00:08:58.960 --> 00:09:05.200 stand there and move two looking at you. It' s like how strong 152 00:09:05.840 --> 00:09:07.879 he looks at you, you don' t think that if cats talked, 153 00:09:07.240 --> 00:09:09.960 they' d all have a voice like a bad faggot and fuck you up. 154 00:09:09.960 --> 00:09:11.440 If I never fuck up your car, dude. That' s why 155 00:09:11.440 --> 00:09:15.240 you' ve noticed that dictators, all dictators have dogs. None of them 156 00:09:15.240 --> 00:09:16.399 have cats. In fact, there is a custom in the United States that 157 00:09:16.440 --> 00:09:18.440 the President of the United States, with your love, wanders to the White 158 00:09:18.440 --> 00:09:22.279 House. This tradition that carries a dog. These people could never bring abduction. 159 00:09:22.320 --> 00:09:24.960 You know why it is? Because it has to be very frustrating to 160 00:09:24.039 --> 00:09:28.360 know that you' re the most powerful person in the world and you don 161 00:09:28.399 --> 00:09:28.840 ' t have the balls to force your vote to do anything. If he 162 00:09:28.960 --> 00:09:31.159 doesn' t want to, you know, I can be the worst dictator. 163 00:09:31.240 --> 00:09:33.039 Hilder gets him with a cat would have missed it. It would be 164 00:09:33.120 --> 00:09:41.360 like already for the pacucha key not pachucha forgives. It' s very strong. 165 00:09:48.279 --> 00:09:50.240 But we' re talking about love, friends, we' re talking 166 00:09:50.240 --> 00:09:54.120 about love. They say beauty is inside. That' s why people kill 167 00:09:54.240 --> 00:10:01.360 for extreme planning. No. You don' t have to make appearances, 168 00:10:01.399 --> 00:10:03.200 Friends, you don' t have to trust the apparent ones, especially at 169 00:10:03.200 --> 00:10:05.639 night. If it hasn' t happened that you sleep with a princess and 170 00:10:05.279 --> 00:10:11.320 wake up like an infant, you don' t have to trust that price 171 00:10:11.399 --> 00:10:13.639 either girls, because, for example, you look at me that you see 172 00:10:13.639 --> 00:10:16.600 a white boy, but all my lovers say that in bed I am transformed 173 00:10:16.720 --> 00:10:30.159 by a black, specifically that step furkel Ja. We already filmed a little 174 00:10:30.200 --> 00:10:31.919 with sex. Not that the whole world has the fantasy of lying down every 175 00:10:33.000 --> 00:10:35.120 night as an unknown person, but that can only be done by rock stars 176 00:10:35.240 --> 00:10:43.240 with the sick. Such a good hemer. If there is any gassed person 177 00:10:43.320 --> 00:10:45.440 who has the family and has found it wrong, please not just to the 178 00:10:45.480 --> 00:10:50.559 chest, tomorrow will have been alive and then there are people with fetishes. 179 00:10:50.600 --> 00:10:52.919 If I don' t confetify you and I have a colleague who' s 180 00:10:52.960 --> 00:10:54.639 your biggest fetish is screwing a virgin always there. I want to throw away 181 00:10:54.639 --> 00:10:56.159 a virgin? I want to throw away a virgin? I want to throw 182 00:10:56.159 --> 00:10:58.279 away a virgin? And I don' t understand it, because I tried 183 00:10:58.320 --> 00:11:01.440 it once and I didn' t like it as a mom and then I 184 00:11:01.480 --> 00:11:05.000 almost got killed by the brothers in the fraternity. You don' t have 185 00:11:05.000 --> 00:11:07.159 to forgive. You don' t have to forgive me. I' m 186 00:11:07.159 --> 00:11:09.399 a boy, very romantic. I' m very romantic. I like to 187 00:11:09.440 --> 00:11:13.799 think that all the girls I' ve been with have taken a little bit 188 00:11:13.840 --> 00:11:26.480 of me is what has the oriasis. Don' t pull this system. 189 00:11:26.480 --> 00:11:28.919 I like it because it always stays like floating in the environment. Not everyone 190 00:11:28.960 --> 00:11:35.840 is living their experience and it is nice that it is so. Now I 191 00:11:35.879 --> 00:11:37.720 ' m cold, you' ve fucked her lately. Not because she wants 192 00:11:37.720 --> 00:11:39.200 us to have children and I don' t want to, and it' 193 00:11:39.279 --> 00:11:41.480 s a very tough situation in a couple. Not because she, to feel 194 00:11:41.480 --> 00:11:43.759 realized as a woman, needs a baby, but I don' t want 195 00:11:43.759 --> 00:11:46.919 anything. So how do you figure it out? Not good, the fairest 196 00:11:46.960 --> 00:11:52.279 thing if I' ve always given a monkey to the middle way truth and 197 00:11:52.360 --> 00:11:54.879 the same to you this remote tells me Danni what you' re going a 198 00:11:54.919 --> 00:12:01.200 monkey is not a child that I tell you good wait for millions of years, 199 00:12:01.559 --> 00:12:03.120 that if we want it all now it' s very easy. And 200 00:12:03.039 --> 00:12:05.399 he didn' t take it well, that is, he takes it well, 201 00:12:05.559 --> 00:12:09.559 that is, he' s angry and he' s gone home and 202 00:12:09.559 --> 00:12:13.159 he' s left me with the monkey. But I' m good at 203 00:12:13.159 --> 00:12:15.759 it. I' m doing well because when you' re in a very 204 00:12:15.840 --> 00:12:18.960 long relationship, you don' t realize that living with a monkey looks pretty 205 00:12:18.039 --> 00:12:22.600 much like living with your girlfriend. Not because we' re going to talk 206 00:12:22.679 --> 00:12:24.840 to you, and after a minute in your head, you can only hear 207 00:12:24.919 --> 00:12:31.799 uuaaaaaaaaaaaa. But, Brother, you have an advantage. The monkey has an 208 00:12:31.840 --> 00:12:37.600 advantage, and at the same time makes pirouettes, you hahahahaja. So, 209 00:12:37.679 --> 00:12:43.120 girls, girls, girls, girls, girls who are looking at me now 210 00:12:43.159 --> 00:12:46.600 I have an eyebrow up and cross a tip. I have a roll and 211 00:12:46.679 --> 00:12:48.639 a roll if you complained that we didn' t see you. Listen, 212 00:12:48.879 --> 00:12:52.120 when you talk to him, put something else on your side, but he 213 00:12:52.200 --> 00:12:56.320 ' s gonna give you a couple of flips. Hey, it' s 214 00:12:56.360 --> 00:12:56.720 not the same thing. It' s not the same thing your nine is 215 00:12:56.720 --> 00:12:58.360 talking to you. I don' t know about the last mari of the 216 00:12:58.399 --> 00:13:03.440 fifteen m There' s the go of the door that' s boring, 217 00:13:03.639 --> 00:13:07.399 but imagine he does it hanging from the lamp face down. It' s 218 00:13:07.519 --> 00:13:09.559 how I' m interested. Well, I know you' ve learned a 219 00:13:09.600 --> 00:13:13.039 little bit in this part. We all know that man comes from the monkey. 220 00:13:13.279 --> 00:13:16.360 In the case of the Jonkies, continuously that like this of the Johnkys, 221 00:13:16.600 --> 00:13:18.279 I have always had a doubt not, because to see we all know 222 00:13:18.320 --> 00:13:22.759 that a Yonking cannot have a coherent conversation, but either the first division forces 223 00:13:22.879 --> 00:13:26.679 or forces. So I say to see they haven' t been fooling themselves 224 00:13:26.759 --> 00:13:31.159 and it turns out that what fucks your brain is not really drugs and it 225 00:13:31.159 --> 00:13:43.360 ' s chandal. My girl says I changed her life. It' s 226 00:13:43.399 --> 00:13:46.440 nice for a girl to tell you that, not the roles she always says 227 00:13:46.480 --> 00:13:50.000 crying and breaking things. It' s not hard being it' s not 228 00:13:50.000 --> 00:13:52.519 hard on me boyfriend, because you don' t just have to be a 229 00:13:52.600 --> 00:13:54.679 lover and friend, right, sometimes you also have to be a psychologist. 230 00:13:54.399 --> 00:13:56.399 The other day I didn' t get very sad home. Tenny told me. 231 00:13:58.279 --> 00:14:00.440 I think I hate my father, or I' m a more person. 232 00:14:01.480 --> 00:14:05.200 Of course not, honey. Everyone hates your father. He' s 233 00:14:05.200 --> 00:14:13.240 a drunk. Sometimes I do not think about finding out children. I like 234 00:14:13.240 --> 00:14:16.879 ninchos, I like kids you know no, not as much as Michael Jackson, 235 00:14:16.000 --> 00:14:20.039 but you have a son. Okay. I don' t want to 236 00:14:20.159 --> 00:14:22.120 make a joke about this. In fact, I' m going to explain. 237 00:14:22.120 --> 00:14:24.080 I' m a big fan of Michael Jackson. No, and I 238 00:14:24.080 --> 00:14:26.559 had a really bad time when people joke that with this subject because we didn 239 00:14:26.559 --> 00:14:28.600 ' t remember how things went. Not really to see. For starters, 240 00:14:28.759 --> 00:14:31.120 Michel Jackson wasn' t convicted of this case He was innocent. Second, 241 00:14:31.159 --> 00:14:33.679 he wasn' t accused of raping children either. They were good, some 242 00:14:33.679 --> 00:14:37.279 touching, talking bad, some straws that won' t leave either. And 243 00:14:37.399 --> 00:14:39.879 finally, the child who accused him was a child of a very poor family 244 00:14:39.919 --> 00:14:43.279 who had to canher and Mekal Jackson paid for the treatment, I knew the 245 00:14:43.320 --> 00:14:48.679 life of that child and man called my hypochondriac, but I sincerely believe that 246 00:14:48.720 --> 00:14:52.399 if I had cancer and any of you saved my life, I have no 247 00:14:52.120 --> 00:14:56.840 problem. Don' t take a straw. It' s just that I 248 00:14:56.960 --> 00:15:07.080 make you the straw of your life. Come on, look, I put 249 00:15:07.120 --> 00:15:09.639 you on incense, a record worse than Ana Rosa' s show, the 250 00:15:09.639 --> 00:15:13.679 total straw. And this has not made me think that there are many problems 251 00:15:13.720 --> 00:15:16.759 in the world, in many problems. Not because right now people are dying 252 00:15:16.840 --> 00:15:20.480 of diseases that have been eradicated. It' s the middle age and that 253 00:15:20.639 --> 00:15:24.519 ' s happening not only makes the world, it' s happening much closer 254 00:15:24.600 --> 00:15:28.080 in Murcia, b in lugo. And on the other hand, luckily, 255 00:15:28.360 --> 00:15:31.399 by desiring you, we also have many perverts with money. I don' 256 00:15:31.440 --> 00:15:35.679 t know if you see where I' m going, but it wouldn' 257 00:15:35.720 --> 00:15:39.320 t be cool if the government didn' t take out a law that basically 258 00:15:39.320 --> 00:15:41.960 says if you knew someone' s life you could throw it away once it 259 00:15:41.960 --> 00:15:45.080 would be so bad. It' s immoral. Yeah, it' s 260 00:15:45.240 --> 00:15:56.200 responsive, yeah, we' d save lives. So, you want to 261 00:15:56.240 --> 00:16:02.720 want me to take this idea to the children' s days and call me 262 00:16:02.720 --> 00:16:12.200 upset. Maybe there are more things you shouldn' t joke about. Never. 263 00:16:12.240 --> 00:16:15.000 No, for example, sexual abuse, right, sexual abuse is never 264 00:16:15.399 --> 00:16:22.279 fun. Never unless you get raped, it' s a little road boy. 265 00:16:22.759 --> 00:16:27.840 But that' s very difficult. Let' s think about this. 266 00:16:30.480 --> 00:16:34.000 Someone in this room I islanda, can assure eye ensure that if you were 267 00:16:34.039 --> 00:16:37.440 shot by little boy from the driveway at no time would you miss the laugh. 268 00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:42.000 Well, I don' t say at the time of the rape, 269 00:16:42.039 --> 00:16:48.320 that it' s obviously very hard and very dramatic, but then I would 270 00:16:48.320 --> 00:16:52.159 commit myself to rebuilding the facts. I have a suspect then. He' 271 00:16:52.240 --> 00:16:57.799 s a white male of about sixty, bald in a shirt of many colors 272 00:16:57.879 --> 00:17:02.679 and how it was that he attacked me walking so calmly. So today who 273 00:17:02.879 --> 00:17:10.319 does copode now and can' t tell us anything else. I don' 274 00:17:10.440 --> 00:17:22.440 t just remember his twin blades and the attack took place in an open field. 275 00:17:22.519 --> 00:17:26.920 Right, yeah, how do you know? He is the sinner of 276 00:17:26.000 --> 00:17:37.640 the prairie. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, nothing, but we are, we are talking about 277 00:17:37.680 --> 00:17:41.799 love and we have strayed in addition to one aspect perhaps not at the end. 278 00:17:42.160 --> 00:17:45.680 Yes, it' s true that my girl ended up leaving me, 279 00:17:45.880 --> 00:17:48.240 saying she needed to be with a man who would surprise you every day. 280 00:17:48.640 --> 00:17:53.720 I guess he' s happy because he left like a schizophrenic, but not 281 00:17:53.799 --> 00:17:56.880 according to Rico, he wasn' t fat nicol baton that while we were 282 00:17:56.960 --> 00:18:00.160 together, he gave me everything a woman can give a man. But not 283 00:18:00.160 --> 00:18:10.440 that venereal thing. And that' s because we complicated a lot. Love 284 00:18:10.480 --> 00:18:11.480 isn' t that hard. Love isn' t that complicated. I, 285 00:18:11.559 --> 00:18:15.480 to be really happy, the only thing I would need is you know what 286 00:18:15.480 --> 00:18:18.200 the love of a normal girl is, and nothing more, just the love 287 00:18:18.279 --> 00:18:23.839 of a normal girl, good for two dwarfs. But it is and now 288 00:18:23.880 --> 00:18:26.640 I am learning what the taste of lovelessness is, not the taste of lovelessness. 289 00:18:26.720 --> 00:18:30.400 And it' s funny because many great poets have asked what the taste 290 00:18:30.440 --> 00:18:33.799 of love is, many great poets. No Williams is invisible spirit, but 291 00:18:34.880 --> 00:18:37.680 no one has ever wondered what he knows. The lovebreaker was thinking about it. 292 00:18:38.319 --> 00:18:41.160 He can' t know, obviously, anything rich. It has to 293 00:18:41.200 --> 00:18:42.920 know sadness, loneliness, depression and what we eat when we' re sad, 294 00:18:44.200 --> 00:18:45.559 overwhelmed, depressed, when we give a shit, then I realized that 295 00:18:45.640 --> 00:18:52.880 lovelessness, at least my lovelessness, has to know Chinese pizza. You know 296 00:18:52.920 --> 00:18:56.079 what the fuck I' m talking about. It is not these pizzas that 297 00:18:56.119 --> 00:18:57.680 they sell in Chinese shops cost between two euros, two and a half euros. 298 00:18:57.960 --> 00:19:02.079 There' s like eight lins varieties. I didn' t know anything 299 00:19:02.160 --> 00:19:03.920 that already when you' re taking your whole bread from failure. The whole 300 00:19:03.920 --> 00:19:06.559 bread of failure, the one that doesn' t know consists of Chinese pizza, 301 00:19:07.039 --> 00:19:10.480 bag of potatoes and liter of beer that the dependent sells to you as 302 00:19:10.519 --> 00:19:15.480 if you really want to do this to the lucky cat they look at you 303 00:19:15.519 --> 00:19:19.680 it' s like I can' t see this and I understand that it 304 00:19:19.680 --> 00:19:22.039 ' s a necessary product, protente, but it should be more sincere with 305 00:19:22.079 --> 00:19:25.799 the shit that they' re selling to us than that thing of putting names 306 00:19:25.799 --> 00:19:27.200 close, those pizzas. You know primame pizza. Here I am treading spring, 307 00:19:27.640 --> 00:19:32.920 not pizza spring. It should be called raw winter pizza. The four 308 00:19:33.000 --> 00:19:37.440 seasons, four disappointments, the margarita, the tear and the coal, the 309 00:19:37.519 --> 00:19:51.839 ortega, the lara or the yea more with people. And one last thing 310 00:19:51.880 --> 00:19:55.160 because since I' ve been out on Palmon Comedy, sometimes people recognize me 311 00:19:55.200 --> 00:19:56.559 on the street. It' s not funny, because you know when people 312 00:19:56.559 --> 00:19:59.440 go near everybody they have the same thing. Another world asks him the same 313 00:19:59.440 --> 00:20:06.359 thing. It' s how Dani recommends golden rain. Boy, I know 314 00:20:06.480 --> 00:20:11.559 and I always ask all the same questions. Of course, you should all 315 00:20:11.559 --> 00:20:14.920 put the juvedoruda with your partner at least once and you have not like it 316 00:20:15.039 --> 00:20:19.000 no matter what, because second of your partner leaves you for another person and 317 00:20:19.079 --> 00:20:23.519 you cross them down the street. You' ll be grateful to have that 318 00:20:23.519 --> 00:20:30.599 mental image. You know Tessatros a lot more sincere sopssa. It' ll 319 00:20:38.240 --> 00:20:41.279 be like yea and since you' ve been a wonderful audience tonight and I 320 00:20:41.319 --> 00:20:45.759 ' m going to do one thing I don' t usually do, which 321 00:20:45.839 --> 00:20:48.559 is, I' d like you to read a poem written about love and 322 00:20:48.599 --> 00:20:48.960 see I' m not a poet, I already say it in advance. 323 00:20:48.039 --> 00:20:51.920 Maybe a little low. After so much, Joker won' t end up 324 00:20:51.920 --> 00:21:03.720 with a little poetry, but I hope this time you' ll let me 325 00:21:03.799 --> 00:21:07.039 say so you ask me what love is. While you eat a Rockefort cheese, 326 00:21:10.200 --> 00:21:14.119 which guy has to arrive, you know what we are poetry critics in 327 00:21:14.160 --> 00:21:21.279 Yoislav Now you don' t better ask me what love is. It is 328 00:21:21.359 --> 00:21:26.119 beauty and imperfection are two mouths that bind with leporine lips. Love is a 329 00:21:26.200 --> 00:21:33.279 seven- messine chimpanzee baby. It' s a shared mental retardation. It 330 00:21:33.400 --> 00:21:44.079 ' s a lurrid song versioned by pitingo. It' s beautiful for the 331 00:21:44.160 --> 00:21:45.920 one who lives it and the one who sees it. Disgusting like a turtle 332 00:21:47.000 --> 00:21:52.400 ' s orgasge or the singing of a gango boy. It' s a 333 00:21:52.480 --> 00:21:53.319 traumatic experience I' ll do when I' m reminded of. Love is 334 00:21:53.400 --> 00:22:06.640 to be raped by a small man on the road. It' s eating 335 00:22:06.680 --> 00:22:12.720 Chinese floor chewing melancholy while your cat watches you thinking how he knew. But 336 00:22:12.720 --> 00:22:15.920 even if you' re fucked. If he knocks on your door again, 337 00:22:15.279 --> 00:22:18.200 don' t say outside, don' t go away or run away. 338 00:22:18.480 --> 00:22:25.680 Let' s all say stronger to the rest now. Thank you very much, 339 00:22:25.680 --> 00:22:26.799 Jos. If a cop laughs