1 00:00:00,640 --> 00:00:16,120 Made a decision a face sunny sun on. I had vision n what's up 2 00:00:16,160 --> 00:00:20,920 everybody, We have a very special guest in studio today. Step you want 3 00:00:20,960 --> 00:00:26,399 to introduce your brother, Well you just did it. Okay. My brother 4 00:00:26,640 --> 00:00:30,960 is here wearing a T shirt that I bought him that says World's most Okayist 5 00:00:31,239 --> 00:00:36,359 brother. That's the world's okayist brother. That says my brother, Michael Wilder. 6 00:00:38,439 --> 00:00:43,399 Hello, haw, it is Cherry Today. Very excited, longtime listener, 7 00:00:43,479 --> 00:00:48,840 first time arriving. There you go. So I we had a we 8 00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:53,880 had a guest fallout, yes, last minute. But I've been wanting my 9 00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:57,920 brother to come on the podcast for years. I think I thought of like, 10 00:00:58,280 --> 00:01:03,280 get his side of the story. Yeah, totally, of all the 11 00:01:03,359 --> 00:01:07,000 stories that I've told about you get your side, defend your defend myself. 12 00:01:07,680 --> 00:01:12,680 It's time. I brought receipts. But he's working. He's a big work 13 00:01:12,760 --> 00:01:17,000 He's a big working man. What do you do, Like, I work 14 00:01:17,079 --> 00:01:22,159 in reality TV. I'm an executive producer of reality television. What exactly is 15 00:01:22,200 --> 00:01:26,319 a reality TV? It's TV that they don't have to pay for writers. 16 00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:34,480 Okay, yeah, he went there. Yeah, he works on tell like, 17 00:01:34,599 --> 00:01:38,159 tell her your your specialty. My specialty is big families nice. So 18 00:01:38,799 --> 00:01:42,439 I did outdoughtered. I don't know if you know outdoors, but it's a 19 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:46,959 family with quintuplet girls. Oh that is outdaughter. Yes, it's not about 20 00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:49,879 daughters who are coming out of the closet, which would have been a good 21 00:01:49,920 --> 00:01:53,319 title too, and it's I was on that for like five seasons running that, 22 00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:57,079 and then the network was like, you've done six kids, let's do 23 00:01:57,200 --> 00:02:01,319 because they have an older sister, let's have you do a show with fourteen 24 00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:06,879 kids. So I was doing doubling down with the Doricos, which is they 25 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:10,759 have twins and triplets and quintuplets and more twins and oh my god. Yeah. 26 00:02:12,240 --> 00:02:16,159 Do they believing birth control? No, they love them babies. Yeah. 27 00:02:16,680 --> 00:02:21,680 Are they trying to have more always? Yeah? Wow yes. But 28 00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:27,280 it's not like a duggers situation. It's not like religious based. No, 29 00:02:27,439 --> 00:02:30,199 they're not religious based. Okay, they just love having them based. They 30 00:02:30,319 --> 00:02:35,520 just the dad loves to have. They're all the kids are named with the 31 00:02:35,599 --> 00:02:39,639 letter D because his name's Dion. So all the kids are Dacian and Derek, 32 00:02:39,919 --> 00:02:46,439 Derek and Dawson and Denico and yeah wow yeah, Denico di Rico, 33 00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:51,879 Denico di Rico. That's crazy. Well, at least it's better than George 34 00:02:51,919 --> 00:02:55,560 Foreman, who named all of his kids George True. And it's so funny 35 00:02:55,680 --> 00:03:01,439 because my ex would make fun of people that always had the same He was 36 00:03:01,520 --> 00:03:06,360 telling Jimmy Kimmel, you know those families that always have to have the same 37 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:10,759 letter to correspond, you know, to match or whatever. And Jimmy's like, 38 00:03:10,840 --> 00:03:15,319 yeah, you mean like my parents Joan and jim and me, Jimmy, 39 00:03:15,520 --> 00:03:20,039 Jonathan and Jill, like us talking about us. And I was like, 40 00:03:20,159 --> 00:03:25,000 oh, yeah, exactly. But yeah, I've always been jealous of 41 00:03:25,039 --> 00:03:29,400 these families that have so many siblings. I always thought that might be fun, 42 00:03:29,520 --> 00:03:32,120 you know, it's chaotic though it's okay, yeah, but it also 43 00:03:32,199 --> 00:03:36,680 puts my parenting to shame at times, because I remember what I when I 44 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:39,960 was working on outdoughdered and they had five like one and a half year olds, 45 00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:43,680 and I'd watch bedtime and they'd all go sleep, and then I think 46 00:03:43,719 --> 00:03:46,840 about how my one kid would stall for hours on end, and I was 47 00:03:46,919 --> 00:03:50,719 like, well, why can they do five and I can't do one? 48 00:03:51,360 --> 00:03:53,599 Right? And the dad was like, because we have no choice. Which 49 00:03:53,639 --> 00:03:57,280 I get, but at the same time, I just think it'd be yes, 50 00:03:57,599 --> 00:04:00,800 hillacious, Yeah, it does sound hard. How old are they now, 51 00:04:00,919 --> 00:04:04,000 like or how old were they when they were What were their age ranges 52 00:04:04,680 --> 00:04:12,039 for the Daurricos or for the for the Outdaughtered. So they're they're now, 53 00:04:12,719 --> 00:04:15,439 God, they're one year younger than my daughter. So they're now eight. 54 00:04:15,040 --> 00:04:20,199 Oh yeah, so but they we I jumped on the show when they were 55 00:04:20,319 --> 00:04:24,399 one and a half. And what do you do on the shows? Like, 56 00:04:24,519 --> 00:04:27,160 so you're there with the families. So I'm there with the families, 57 00:04:27,160 --> 00:04:30,120 and then I go back to post and run posts. So I go, 58 00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:34,079 I go back and forth basically figure out storylines that we're going to tell and 59 00:04:34,199 --> 00:04:39,399 then film that stuff and then the back end kind of makes sense of all 60 00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:43,920 the crap we shoot. Yeah, oh that's pretty cool. Yeah that sounds 61 00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:46,720 fun. It is, it's it's it's a lot. It's fun. You 62 00:04:46,759 --> 00:04:48,600 know, it's a lot of storytelling. Yeah, it's a lot of figuring 63 00:04:48,639 --> 00:04:54,399 stuff out because like it's just average people, right right right, you know, 64 00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:59,040 so we kind of have to help make stuff happens. Now, after 65 00:04:59,160 --> 00:05:03,800 you finished the last season of The Daurricos, you did another job in the 66 00:05:03,879 --> 00:05:08,560 meantime, but it's not airing yet, right, it's not airing yet. 67 00:05:08,639 --> 00:05:12,199 Yes, and tell us about that. Uh, it's nice. Don't look 68 00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:16,240 alike by the way, little but not really. We have a different dad. 69 00:05:16,759 --> 00:05:25,079 And I've heard about the mom. Heard about your mom. Don't worry, 70 00:05:25,120 --> 00:05:29,959 she'll never lest your study. Yes, she's in the car though, 71 00:05:30,000 --> 00:05:34,199 because we're going to bring her in in a second. I said, great, 72 00:05:34,879 --> 00:05:40,279 Yeah, Stephanie next week Stephanie's mom. Yeah, oh my god. 73 00:05:40,800 --> 00:05:44,720 So, uh, tell us about that show. I did a little person 74 00:05:44,839 --> 00:05:49,480 wrestling show. Interesting, like a little person there's two big components to that. 75 00:05:49,600 --> 00:05:53,120 It's like you could just I did a little person show or I did 76 00:05:53,160 --> 00:05:56,319 a wrestling show. But it's like I did a little person wrestling show. 77 00:05:56,480 --> 00:06:00,439 Yes, little person wrestling, little people wrestling show. But you loved it, 78 00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:03,920 right, Oh I loved it. Yeah. They were like fantastic characters. 79 00:06:04,439 --> 00:06:06,959 They were really cool. It was like they were athletes. Yeah. 80 00:06:08,399 --> 00:06:13,040 So they were already doing wrestling and then somebody decides to do a show. 81 00:06:13,399 --> 00:06:16,399 Yes about Yes, so they're already established and they go around the country put 82 00:06:16,480 --> 00:06:21,040 it on matches. Wow, girls and guys, girls and guys. Yes, 83 00:06:21,839 --> 00:06:26,360 now is it girls against girls and guys against guys. Yes, there 84 00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:30,600 used to be like a couple match, like the boyfriend and girlfriend would go 85 00:06:30,639 --> 00:06:33,879 against each other, but now it's girls versus girls, guys versut guys, 86 00:06:34,680 --> 00:06:38,399 and are some of them married to each other? And all that. The 87 00:06:38,720 --> 00:06:42,639 one couple is they're I think they're not married, but they're eventually gonna get 88 00:06:42,639 --> 00:06:46,439 married. They have a kid together, and then that's nice. Yeah, 89 00:06:46,480 --> 00:06:50,360 there's no more relationships, but yeah it's and is there a kid a little 90 00:06:50,439 --> 00:06:55,279 person? No? Interesting? Yeah, so she's puttering around, she's you 91 00:06:55,360 --> 00:06:59,399 know, she's getting tall. Wow, yeah, like taller than them pretty 92 00:06:59,439 --> 00:07:03,199 much. Yeah, I mean it's crazy. Yeah yeah, but watching them, 93 00:07:03,319 --> 00:07:06,959 like like athletically, they're doing stuff. So I went in the ring 94 00:07:08,079 --> 00:07:12,439 because the trainer, who's average sized, he was always trying to get us 95 00:07:12,439 --> 00:07:14,439 to go in the ring to show us because we'd be like, hey, 96 00:07:14,480 --> 00:07:15,920 why don't you do this again? And he's like, you know that hurts 97 00:07:15,959 --> 00:07:18,480 him, Like we know, but we're trying to film the show. So 98 00:07:18,560 --> 00:07:20,040 he's like, why don't you guys get in the ring? And I was 99 00:07:20,079 --> 00:07:23,720 like everyone was like no. And then on the last day, I was 100 00:07:23,759 --> 00:07:26,319 climbing around inside the ring when no one was around, and he came in 101 00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:30,439 and he's like, can I can I give you one bump, which is 102 00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:31,319 to knock you down on your you know, on your back. And I 103 00:07:31,439 --> 00:07:35,160 was like, okay, why not? So he did it. I have 104 00:07:35,360 --> 00:07:39,279 the video, but he did it in slow motion. You can see my 105 00:07:39,439 --> 00:07:43,639 soul leaving my body as I hit the mat and then I got up and 106 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,639 I was like, He's like, wasn't that was that bad? I was 107 00:07:45,639 --> 00:07:46,240 like, Oh, it wasn't that bad. The next day I thought, 108 00:07:46,319 --> 00:07:50,079 goes in a car wreck? Really, Oh god, that's kind of brutal. 109 00:07:50,279 --> 00:07:53,319 Yes, well, you got to figure out how to land so you 110 00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:56,639 don't hurt yourself. He told me to breathe out, but then he didn't 111 00:07:56,680 --> 00:08:00,360 tell me to make sure that my neck didn't flop against the only gave me 112 00:08:00,399 --> 00:08:03,040 a little bit of advice, right right, But he was so excited to 113 00:08:03,079 --> 00:08:07,079 do it. So wow. I remember when I was doing parental discretion and 114 00:08:07,160 --> 00:08:11,959 I had to I got in the octagon or what like. It was an 115 00:08:11,639 --> 00:08:16,319 ultimate fighting kind of thing and they had somebody who was gonna and I had 116 00:08:16,360 --> 00:08:20,480 to get in the ring and like put a mouthguarden and it was no joke. 117 00:08:20,720 --> 00:08:22,600 It was terrible. And then she pinned me on the floor and had 118 00:08:22,639 --> 00:08:26,439 me in a choke hold, and I was thought I was going to die. 119 00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:28,279 For a second. I was like, well, when she doesn't know 120 00:08:28,399 --> 00:08:31,839 that I can't. I literally couldn't breathe. And I was like, I 121 00:08:31,879 --> 00:08:35,440 can't breathe and then she let me go. But serious, if you say 122 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:37,679 you can't breathe, you can breathe. Though. That's why I saw my 123 00:08:37,759 --> 00:08:39,960 kids. When I'm tickling them, they say you can't breathe, It's like, 124 00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:43,720 you can breathe, so right, that's true, right, so you 125 00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:46,720 turn blue. I'm not going to stop right right. So you you have 126 00:08:48,120 --> 00:08:52,360 a thirteen year old and a nine year old and their names no, I'm 127 00:08:52,399 --> 00:08:56,840 just kidding, Emerson and Beckett, Yes, and the cutest names. Yeah. 128 00:08:56,720 --> 00:08:58,679 We sort of just I don't know how we came up with them. 129 00:08:58,720 --> 00:09:03,399 We just to keyt on them. Beckett was I always wanted to do Beckett 130 00:09:03,440 --> 00:09:05,799 and then convince my wife into that, and then at a certain point she 131 00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:09,399 started changing her mind. But then when she started calling her talking to her 132 00:09:09,440 --> 00:09:11,639 belly and saying Beckett, I was like, great, we're set there. 133 00:09:13,080 --> 00:09:16,759 And then Emerson we couldn't agree on because I wanted Ava. And then right 134 00:09:16,840 --> 00:09:18,039 before she was going to give births, she was like, what are we 135 00:09:18,120 --> 00:09:22,159 naming this baby? And I was like, We'll do Emerson. Wow. 136 00:09:22,799 --> 00:09:26,639 I liked Emerson. I like Emerson's defensive Roquel. I was she I think 137 00:09:26,720 --> 00:09:28,840 she had pitched me the name, and I was like, oh, that's 138 00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:31,759 really cute. And I think she's like, Michael doesn't like it, and 139 00:09:31,799 --> 00:09:35,200 I was like, he'll come around. I liked it. By the way, 140 00:09:35,679 --> 00:09:39,600 Michael is like one of my favorite male names, and Raquel is my 141 00:09:39,159 --> 00:09:43,720 ultimate favorite female name. I love that name, Raquel. I wanted to 142 00:09:43,840 --> 00:09:48,919 name Natalia Raquel, but I got and they called it. They call her 143 00:09:48,039 --> 00:09:52,799 Rocky I think cute, or her mom calls her rick. Yes for some 144 00:09:52,960 --> 00:10:01,000 reason, Ricky rick Rick. Yeah, I like it. So my brother 145 00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:05,639 and I raised together, Yes, because he my mom had him. But 146 00:10:05,759 --> 00:10:11,360 I was already seven. So what's the age difference? Seven years? Okay? 147 00:10:13,360 --> 00:10:18,759 Got it? Seven years and five days? Yes, yes, so 148 00:10:18,919 --> 00:10:22,159 that day is on July fifthies July tenth, oh, okay, days make 149 00:10:22,159 --> 00:10:26,480 a difference. The other siblings, though, you guys don't talk to we 150 00:10:26,639 --> 00:10:30,159 have one young well, you have a lot of other siblings, but I 151 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:33,000 have one younger sibling. Where we have one younger sibling, that's she's two 152 00:10:33,039 --> 00:10:37,360 and a half years younger than me. Yeah, no, we don't speak 153 00:10:37,399 --> 00:10:45,600 to her because when so when I stopped having a relationship with my mother and 154 00:10:45,639 --> 00:10:50,159 stepfather, my brother had already not had a relationship with them for like a 155 00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:54,440 year, and it so it's almost like we all got a divorce and then 156 00:10:56,000 --> 00:11:00,200 like my sister got them in the divorce, right, yeah, we got 157 00:11:00,240 --> 00:11:05,320 custody or icy Yeah, she just sort of globbed over I guess globed over 158 00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:09,399 there or sort of not sided because there was no siding. I didn't just 159 00:11:09,840 --> 00:11:13,720 once it happened, I just never spoke to her again. So Icye and 160 00:11:13,080 --> 00:11:20,919 you Stephanie just already didn't wasn't didn't No, I mean once once my brother 161 00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:28,320 wasn't wasn't talking to them. I was very how do I put this, 162 00:11:28,000 --> 00:11:31,840 I was having my own major issues that had nothing even to do with his 163 00:11:33,039 --> 00:11:37,759 issues. But then I was, of course protective. We were all having 164 00:11:37,919 --> 00:11:41,360 issues. And then remember, I mean, it doesn't matter, we can 165 00:11:41,399 --> 00:11:48,720 tell this part of the story. There was my brother received a letter certified 166 00:11:48,759 --> 00:11:52,360 mail. Yeah, twelve was it twelve or sixteen pages? Something insane amount 167 00:11:52,399 --> 00:11:56,200 of pages? I think one patreon. Many years ago, I read some 168 00:11:56,320 --> 00:12:00,679 of the letter and people complained because it went on to too long. I 169 00:12:00,759 --> 00:12:05,440 was like, well, it's hard to distill it down just one sentiment, 170 00:12:05,080 --> 00:12:09,960 so I think we are he already hadn't been talking to him, right, 171 00:12:09,840 --> 00:12:13,519 Yes, because I got that letter. I got that letter New Year's Eve 172 00:12:13,759 --> 00:12:16,519 of whenever, whenever the fallout happened, when the fall that happened with me 173 00:12:16,639 --> 00:12:20,360 and my parents, I was kind of like, well, that's it. 174 00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:24,000 And I told my wife. I was like, that's it. We're never 175 00:12:24,039 --> 00:12:26,000 going to speak again, and she's like, what, how's that possible? 176 00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:30,000 Like, I just just knowing the personalities involved. And then yeah, the 177 00:12:30,039 --> 00:12:31,159 last thing I got, well, I got that letter and then I get 178 00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:35,080 emails later, but that letter was, yeah, came on that New Year's 179 00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:39,360 Eve and what can you tell us? What in a nutshell? Remind us 180 00:12:39,399 --> 00:12:43,480 what the letter was? The letter was basically telling me what a bad son 181 00:12:43,559 --> 00:12:48,000 I was, with examples and stuff like that. I don't remember it that 182 00:12:48,159 --> 00:12:50,919 well because I only read it once and then I handed it to Steff and 183 00:12:50,279 --> 00:12:54,399 then she took it and has been you know, reading it, and we 184 00:12:54,559 --> 00:12:58,759 used to have a reading, an annual reading to remind ourselves of how insane 185 00:12:58,799 --> 00:13:03,720 it was. It was very mean. It was like a character assassination and 186 00:13:05,480 --> 00:13:09,240 something to know about my brother. He's like the kindest, he's a mensch. 187 00:13:09,559 --> 00:13:13,200 Yeah, yes, he has the biggest heart. You can tell. 188 00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:18,879 He's a good guy. He's funny and kind and like a nice person, 189 00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:22,600 like a genuinely like nice person who cares about people. And this letter was 190 00:13:22,679 --> 00:13:28,919 so like, what who are you talking about? Like you and my brother 191 00:13:28,000 --> 00:13:33,279 and I always like through the years, like I just don't. Here's the 192 00:13:33,360 --> 00:13:39,240 thing. My stepfather is a grudge holder. He's litigious. He likes to 193 00:13:39,440 --> 00:13:41,960 be in fights with people. That's what gives him like a charge. And 194 00:13:43,279 --> 00:13:46,960 my brother and I have talked about this, you know a few times. 195 00:13:46,360 --> 00:13:52,440 But he also had a terrible upbringing, our stepfather, my stepfather, But 196 00:13:52,559 --> 00:13:56,960 the letter came from him. The letter came from him, but I feel 197 00:13:56,960 --> 00:13:58,960 like it was ghost written by my mom. Well, she definitely helped. 198 00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:03,720 She did, because there's some big words in there. God yeah, now 199 00:14:03,759 --> 00:14:07,279 I remember, yeah, And it's funny that you're saying that now because when 200 00:14:07,279 --> 00:14:09,480 we were reading the letter. I mean, Steph did a couple. She 201 00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:11,360 was like, well, that part's true, and that part's true, and 202 00:14:11,440 --> 00:14:15,399 he's got a point that I remember that part right right. I was like, 203 00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:18,960 let's not be hasty, just throw it all away. It's feedback. 204 00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:22,679 I like it edited, you know, just someone changed a few things, 205 00:14:22,919 --> 00:14:24,879 right, constructive feedback, right, you know, we all have to be 206 00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:28,840 open to that sometimes. I remember there was a point where he was mad 207 00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:33,799 because he had he was wearing like a bowler hat. What was that hat 208 00:14:33,919 --> 00:14:37,559 for my wedding? He had this crazy hat that he wanted to wear and 209 00:14:37,799 --> 00:14:41,679 my in laws didn't want him to wear in the pictures, and everybody was 210 00:14:41,720 --> 00:14:43,799 fighting about everything, and I was like, I didn't care if he wore 211 00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:46,879 the hat or not. But they asked for some pictures without, not that 212 00:14:46,960 --> 00:14:48,440 my in laws were ever going to take pictures of him and put them in 213 00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:50,960 the album, but so I asked him, you know, could you do 214 00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:54,440 a few pictures without? And that was in the letter because he was like, 215 00:14:54,600 --> 00:14:58,320 you should have been honored that me and my hat made it to the 216 00:14:58,399 --> 00:15:03,200 wedding. And I never even invited his hat, like his hat was a 217 00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:09,240 plus one that we know one of those. Wow, Well he took a 218 00:15:09,360 --> 00:15:15,000 lot of pride in he has never worn a suit. He called it a 219 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:16,480 monkey suit. Remember, he was like, I wasn't you wanted me to 220 00:15:16,519 --> 00:15:22,840 wear a monkey suit? And he did not want to wear He never ever 221 00:15:22,919 --> 00:15:24,399 wore a suit in his whole life. He's like a you know, what 222 00:15:24,440 --> 00:15:28,720 do you call it? Like an anti anti establishment guy, you know, 223 00:15:30,039 --> 00:15:35,080 rage against the machine. Yes, and that included he didn't want to have 224 00:15:37,159 --> 00:15:41,960 jobs or people ever telling him what to do. But and but his big 225 00:15:43,080 --> 00:15:45,960 thing was like, but we needed to respect him. There's a lot of 226 00:15:46,039 --> 00:15:50,639 like you have to respect me, and what I say disorder? How do 227 00:15:50,679 --> 00:15:54,360 you think? Yeah? Yeah, what a match? The ails two seem 228 00:15:54,480 --> 00:16:02,200 like your mom and your stepdad. Yeah. But then the other weird thing 229 00:16:02,320 --> 00:16:07,600 is that you got a thing. You got a beautiful pictures in the mail. 230 00:16:07,120 --> 00:16:11,200 Yes, So I wanted to know what you thought about that, Michael. 231 00:16:11,519 --> 00:16:15,360 I remember when Stephanie told us about this. Yeah, yeah, well 232 00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:18,000 tell us what you got? Well what I got? So in the mail 233 00:16:18,480 --> 00:16:21,679 I walked out of my house and there was a package for my dad. 234 00:16:21,720 --> 00:16:25,960 Now I haven't heard from my dad in five years and or no longer, 235 00:16:26,480 --> 00:16:30,200 right, sixteen, I've lost track. No, no, it's been like 236 00:16:30,279 --> 00:16:33,919 sixteen years because I haven't. I haven't talked to this since I was two 237 00:16:33,240 --> 00:16:37,279 and she's turning nineteen. Yeah, I had, so I hadn't heard from 238 00:16:37,320 --> 00:16:40,039 him, accepted in an email. I heard an email from him in two 239 00:16:40,080 --> 00:16:41,519 thousand and six or something, so that's that's my last contact with him. 240 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:45,440 And then there was this package from him, and I was like, oh 241 00:16:45,559 --> 00:16:48,600 no, I mean, like, am I being sued or I honestly was 242 00:16:48,720 --> 00:16:52,879 concerned. So I just left it there for I had to take my daughter 243 00:16:52,960 --> 00:16:55,519 to Ninja class. I was like, I do not want to open this 244 00:16:55,600 --> 00:16:59,279 and then have to go. And so when I got home, I opened 245 00:16:59,320 --> 00:17:03,319 it up and it was sheets, sheets and sheets. My dad's a fantastic 246 00:17:03,359 --> 00:17:08,079 photographer, and it was all these pictures of me as a baby and a 247 00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:14,119 toddler and it was like, I mean, it threw me for a loop 248 00:17:14,160 --> 00:17:15,960 because I don't have many, you know, we had this big break. 249 00:17:17,000 --> 00:17:19,279 I don't have any pictures from my childhood, like I have one or two. 250 00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:23,720 There's one picture of me and Steph as young, when we're young, 251 00:17:23,799 --> 00:17:27,920 and it looks like Elbie and my son Beckett at their age could look exactly 252 00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:32,759 like that, but there's there's only a couple of pictures I have. Suddenly 253 00:17:32,799 --> 00:17:37,839 I had like a flashback to that time, and it it threw me like 254 00:17:37,839 --> 00:17:41,599 because I was like, why is he sending this to me? And what's 255 00:17:41,680 --> 00:17:47,440 going on? The note was kind of perfunctory. Is that a word you 256 00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:49,960 could use? Like this basically matter of fact? But yeah, I just 257 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:53,039 didn't know if it was trying to make amends. It was very it was 258 00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:56,880 very strange. But then I mean, but you know, it was kind 259 00:17:56,880 --> 00:18:00,599 of nice to have those pictures. Of course, hey let's take a quick 260 00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:06,559 break. Okay, we're back. So so he got all those pictures and 261 00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:10,839 he had sent me a picture of like, hey, there's this package outside, 262 00:18:11,359 --> 00:18:15,039 and I was weirded out too. I'm like, what is what's happening? 263 00:18:15,079 --> 00:18:18,559 I remember this story? And then I got it and then I think 264 00:18:18,599 --> 00:18:22,319 I saw somebody. I don't whatever it was, I was like, oh 265 00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:26,400 shit, I have it too. I opened mine first, so I didn't 266 00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:27,319 want to tell him what it was. I was like, I bet you 267 00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:30,519 it's the same thing. But I was like, hey, it's not bad, 268 00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:34,640 and then yeah it was. And then my brother and I have been 269 00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:38,359 trying to figure out, like we were like is he is he dying? 270 00:18:38,799 --> 00:18:42,680 Yeah, like yeah, weird because he wasn't trying to make up with us, 271 00:18:44,119 --> 00:18:45,720 no, because I wrote him back. I mean it took me a 272 00:18:45,799 --> 00:18:48,880 while, but I finally wrote him back and obviously never heard from him. 273 00:18:48,960 --> 00:18:53,920 But I wrote him back and just thanked him and I opened the door because 274 00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:56,160 like, look, I was never going to open the door because I know 275 00:18:56,839 --> 00:19:03,160 my sister and I think we dealt with the issues. I think in the 276 00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:06,559 house differently, there was the fight or flight. I feel like you fought 277 00:19:06,759 --> 00:19:08,920 more than I fought. Once the stuff started happened to me, I was 278 00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:11,039 like, fuck it, I'm out of here, Like I just I would 279 00:19:11,079 --> 00:19:15,960 just just my high school years. I just sort of disappeared, and I 280 00:19:15,039 --> 00:19:18,240 want to, you know, like, but it took care of myself. 281 00:19:18,920 --> 00:19:22,079 So even when we had the falling out, I know you kept kind of 282 00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:25,839 going. But it's this relationship I want to have with mom. That's why 283 00:19:25,839 --> 00:19:26,839 I knew when we had the falling out, I was like, that's it, 284 00:19:27,440 --> 00:19:30,480 because my instinct is to be like I'm out of here and I've already 285 00:19:30,519 --> 00:19:34,160 I'd already tried enough, so to get that those pictures. I was like, 286 00:19:36,799 --> 00:19:38,599 is he is he dying? Like what you know? Like is he 287 00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:41,839 trying to make amends? Is he just trying to open the door. But 288 00:19:42,119 --> 00:19:48,000 so I sent that letter saying I'll leave the door open as well if you 289 00:19:48,039 --> 00:19:52,400 ever want to contact me, like, oh you did, yeah, because 290 00:19:52,440 --> 00:19:53,759 I and he never did. He never did, but I didn't think he 291 00:19:53,799 --> 00:19:56,960 would. But I was like, you know what, like, I'm not 292 00:19:56,160 --> 00:20:00,400 I wanted to say thank you. I don't know if there's a says, 293 00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:03,359 I don't know if there's anything else to say or if there's but if you 294 00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:06,759 know, if you want to reach out, you have my number so you 295 00:20:06,799 --> 00:20:10,079 can call me and nothing and you put your number in there, No, 296 00:20:10,759 --> 00:20:14,400 because that would be then then you would really have my number. I was 297 00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:18,400 just saying it, did you put your number? No? I don't think 298 00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:21,039 so. I don't know he has my number. They have my number. 299 00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:25,240 That's just so weird. It's weird to me, or maybe put my number 300 00:20:25,359 --> 00:20:32,720 sad? It is it's it is sad. I mean it was emotional too, 301 00:20:33,640 --> 00:20:38,079 but then you also have to think my mother. They made a choice 302 00:20:38,319 --> 00:20:41,680 not to speak to both of us, and at different times it wasn't like 303 00:20:41,880 --> 00:20:45,640 it wasn't like we were together and had a fight with them. It was 304 00:20:45,200 --> 00:20:52,200 but they have a way or had a way of like kind of grinding grinding, 305 00:20:52,599 --> 00:20:57,920 like not giving any These are not people who ever apologized, whoever would 306 00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:03,440 see their part in anything. It was like always you did something wrong, 307 00:21:03,039 --> 00:21:07,200 we're mad about it, Like you need you know what I mean, Like 308 00:21:07,319 --> 00:21:11,240 you need to come correct, and at a certain point you just go like 309 00:21:12,079 --> 00:21:15,880 I know. For me, it was when I had a kid, and 310 00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:18,880 it was like for a while, I felt like, well, I want 311 00:21:18,920 --> 00:21:22,880 to keep this relationship, like you said, because I want my daughter to 312 00:21:22,960 --> 00:21:26,599 have like it. It's so sad to go, like my daughter's not going 313 00:21:26,680 --> 00:21:30,200 to have grandparents because John's parents were really old right on the East coast, 314 00:21:30,279 --> 00:21:34,559 and I'm like, my kid has grandparents like right here, like a few 315 00:21:34,599 --> 00:21:38,079 miles from my house, Like why would I I So for me, I 316 00:21:38,240 --> 00:21:41,200 was like, I've got to make this work. So even after he got 317 00:21:41,279 --> 00:21:47,240 into like a big fight with them over something very valid, by the way, 318 00:21:47,720 --> 00:21:51,640 like over the way my stepfather was talking to his wife and he had 319 00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:55,400 to draw a line in the sand, and I felt for him and felt 320 00:21:55,440 --> 00:21:57,880 loyal to him, but at the same time, and I'd had a fight 321 00:21:57,960 --> 00:22:02,759 with them for a different reason. But then I felt I always felt like, 322 00:22:02,839 --> 00:22:04,599 oh, I got to go back. I forgot to make this work 323 00:22:04,880 --> 00:22:08,920 right for your kids, for my kids. But then I think there was 324 00:22:08,960 --> 00:22:15,000 a There was just a moment where I brought Elbe to see my mom because 325 00:22:15,039 --> 00:22:18,680 it became always me, always like if I wanted to see her, like 326 00:22:18,880 --> 00:22:25,759 I had to slept Elbe to her and then just to go for a walk 327 00:22:25,880 --> 00:22:29,039 because at a certain point I didn't want to deal with my stepfather anymore. 328 00:22:29,119 --> 00:22:33,400 So I was like, my mom wouldn't just come over right and hang or 329 00:22:33,519 --> 00:22:36,839 help with the baby or you know. So I brought her over and it 330 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:40,279 was sort of infrequent, it would be like every other week. And Elbe 331 00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:44,279 has anxiety, probably since she was a baby, and I remember she was 332 00:22:44,400 --> 00:22:49,039 kind of like like didn't want like my mom reached out for her and she 333 00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:52,880 sort of recoiled a little bit, and then my mom was pissed at a 334 00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:56,799 baby, like, oh, well, I guess she's in a bad mood. 335 00:22:56,839 --> 00:22:59,559 And it was like, no, she's not in a bad mood. 336 00:22:59,640 --> 00:23:02,640 She doesn't know you, Like I didn't say that, but I was like 337 00:23:02,799 --> 00:23:04,960 what And then I was like, Wow, why am I being put in 338 00:23:06,039 --> 00:23:10,200 a position? And then and then she kind of acted like Elbe was sort 339 00:23:10,200 --> 00:23:14,000 of a nuisance that Albe was there because she wanted to be telling me about 340 00:23:14,039 --> 00:23:18,240 something. And I I remember having this moment where I was like, she's 341 00:23:18,279 --> 00:23:23,920 got hardly any toys in the house, right, Like you hear about grandma's 342 00:23:25,039 --> 00:23:26,319 that are like, oh my god, I can't wait to be a grandma, 343 00:23:26,319 --> 00:23:29,240 And I'm like, well, my mom was not a great mom, 344 00:23:29,319 --> 00:23:32,160 but like me, she has a doover like she can be a great Yeah, 345 00:23:32,599 --> 00:23:36,000 one of those people that's like, I love having a granddaughter. I'm 346 00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:37,880 going to be different, you know. But it was like, but does 347 00:23:37,960 --> 00:23:41,960 she know she has to be different? I think that's one of the bigger 348 00:23:41,000 --> 00:23:45,759 issues, right, Like does she think she needs a do over because she 349 00:23:45,759 --> 00:23:51,279 doesn't think she was wrong exactly exactly? Yeah, so she I remember she 350 00:23:51,359 --> 00:23:55,960 had like a set of blocks that were too kind of too old for LB, 351 00:23:56,119 --> 00:23:59,160 especially when she was younger, right, but those were for my dad. 352 00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:04,920 Yeah. So I just remember her being kind of annoyed that Lbie was 353 00:24:04,960 --> 00:24:08,359 even there, and it was almost like she was kind of like like, 354 00:24:08,519 --> 00:24:11,920 does she have to be like she would be like that's cute, but like 355 00:24:12,119 --> 00:24:15,400 now we're done with that, and I want to like tell you about like 356 00:24:15,559 --> 00:24:18,480 some work story. And I remember thinking what am I doing? Yeah, 357 00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:22,599 you know, it's just so weird to me that she lives out here right 358 00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:32,119 in Los Angeles. So she lives out here, She's got grandchildren from her 359 00:24:32,359 --> 00:24:37,319 daughter and her son, and yet doesn't It's just like they don't exist. 360 00:24:37,720 --> 00:24:41,920 Yeah, it's just bizarre to me. Like I don't know how people. 361 00:24:41,640 --> 00:24:47,839 I understand being a terrible parent. I kind of understand that. But when 362 00:24:48,039 --> 00:24:49,920 yes, like you said, it's like, now's your chance for redemption. 363 00:24:52,160 --> 00:24:56,160 You live in LA. You got grandchildren, I mean, go see them 364 00:24:56,640 --> 00:25:02,960 or something, but nothing, which is weird. My dad's letter even said 365 00:25:03,359 --> 00:25:04,559 I thought you might want some pictures of you as a kid to share with 366 00:25:04,640 --> 00:25:08,720 your kids. So he they know because they never even like my falling out 367 00:25:08,799 --> 00:25:12,960 was before I had kids, so they've never they don't even they've never met 368 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:17,480 my kids or or acknowledged they were acknowledged or anything like that. Yeah, 369 00:25:17,559 --> 00:25:23,079 so my god, Yeah, so but they know, wow, And they've 370 00:25:23,119 --> 00:25:26,960 never met your name name never twin twins, and they haven't seen Elbie since 371 00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:30,799 she was two. So LB's the only grandchildren out of all you guys. 372 00:25:32,000 --> 00:25:34,920 What about the other siblings. She has a son. We don't know if 373 00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:37,359 they're close or not. I mean, I don't know. So they might 374 00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:41,519 not be close either. She might not be a I think that they are, 375 00:25:41,640 --> 00:25:47,319 aren't they? I have no idea. Our sister is not on social 376 00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:51,359 media. Oh she's not on Facebook. That sucks, no, especially for 377 00:25:51,480 --> 00:25:56,599 you. Well, she had us both blocked, of course, and John 378 00:25:56,720 --> 00:26:00,319 blocked. I think so because we because we look every once in a while, 379 00:26:00,359 --> 00:26:02,759 you know, I'd be like, and she's not there. And then 380 00:26:02,759 --> 00:26:06,720 all of a sudden, STEPH looked under John's account and founder, and I 381 00:26:06,759 --> 00:26:10,640 looked under my wife's account and founder, and we're like, she purposely went 382 00:26:10,720 --> 00:26:14,079 to block us. And there wasn't even anything like fascinating. It was really 383 00:26:14,160 --> 00:26:19,000 boring stuff that she was blocking us from. Yeah, it's it's all very 384 00:26:19,200 --> 00:26:25,839 very odd, especially because it wasn't this dramatic like our childhood wasn't even like 385 00:26:26,079 --> 00:26:30,240 super dramatic or I mean, it wasn't great, but it wasn't it right. 386 00:26:30,440 --> 00:26:34,799 I mean, it wasn't like horrifying like neglect or abuse. It was 387 00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:40,039 just like so it has always been weird to us. But I do feel, 388 00:26:40,160 --> 00:26:42,880 and I think my brother feels too, that the keeping up of the 389 00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:48,119 relationship with them in the first place was all work on our part. Yeah. 390 00:26:48,240 --> 00:26:49,240 Yeah, it was tiring. I mean, that was the whole Because 391 00:26:49,279 --> 00:26:52,319 I do talk about that. I'm like, it's not you know, you 392 00:26:52,440 --> 00:26:55,720 hear about people's childhoods where you're like, oh my god, that sounds awful 393 00:26:55,799 --> 00:26:57,599 and it's hard to point to stuff. But it was just sort of like 394 00:26:57,680 --> 00:27:03,359 a constant thing. It was basically the two of them together, and you 395 00:27:03,480 --> 00:27:04,400 had to be in the fold. And if you were in the fold, 396 00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:08,519 then you were you were in trouble or ostracized or or you know. My 397 00:27:10,079 --> 00:27:15,200 dad wouldn't speak to me for days for who knows what reason, and my 398 00:27:15,279 --> 00:27:17,799 mom would back them up. So, like, even the fight we had, 399 00:27:18,079 --> 00:27:21,799 I got into it with him, and then when I spoke to my 400 00:27:21,880 --> 00:27:22,839 mom and I was like, look, this is ridiculous, and we had 401 00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:26,519 a whole conversation. It sounded like I was getting through to her because she 402 00:27:26,720 --> 00:27:29,720 was, you know, she was crying a little bit, and she's like, 403 00:27:29,759 --> 00:27:32,119 I know, I hear you, I hear you. The next time 404 00:27:32,160 --> 00:27:34,640 I spoke to her. She said, you need to apologize to your dad 405 00:27:36,039 --> 00:27:38,200 and I was like for what and she was like, because you you know, 406 00:27:38,279 --> 00:27:41,160 you were route to him and this and that, Like, well, 407 00:27:41,240 --> 00:27:45,160 that's not going to happen. And so that's when I knew, like they 408 00:27:45,200 --> 00:27:47,720 had gone off and been like and that's but I was like, oh my 409 00:27:47,759 --> 00:27:49,160 gosh, this is what we've been doing our whole lives, is kind of 410 00:27:49,200 --> 00:27:51,880 getting back in the fold. And I was like, I don't want to 411 00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:53,759 get back in the fold. I'm good, I'm done. So I was, 412 00:27:55,279 --> 00:27:57,319 I was out and yeah, and that's why I just knew at the 413 00:27:57,400 --> 00:28:00,119 time. And then they like, I said, my dad sent me an 414 00:28:00,119 --> 00:28:03,279 email telling me that I was whatever, and then I guess that he was 415 00:28:03,319 --> 00:28:06,920 worried. I wasn't reading my email, so it was horrible. It was 416 00:28:07,119 --> 00:28:11,160 you're never gonna if you have kids, which I doubt, or something like. 417 00:28:11,240 --> 00:28:14,160 It was basically saying that he'll probably never have kids because he's not. 418 00:28:14,559 --> 00:28:17,079 It's like, that's the only reason I had kids was to prove him wrong. 419 00:28:18,599 --> 00:28:22,599 In your face, Dado, I told you that my mom said to 420 00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:25,759 me when I was talking about whether I would have another kid, and she 421 00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:27,440 was like, I think you're probably somebody who should only have one kid. 422 00:28:27,519 --> 00:28:32,440 Oh yeah, I remember, yeah, what the hell? And so he's 423 00:28:32,480 --> 00:28:36,759 your stepdad, Stephanie, but he's your biological yeah, yes. And have 424 00:28:36,880 --> 00:28:41,400 you ever met Stanley her step heard biological. I met him when I moved 425 00:28:41,440 --> 00:28:44,240 out here. We had Thanksgiving together, we did. Yeah, yeah, 426 00:28:44,400 --> 00:28:48,519 I feel like he would be fun to have Thanksgiving one. I don't know 427 00:28:48,559 --> 00:28:51,720 if he was fun then, yes, okay. I don't know if he 428 00:28:51,839 --> 00:28:57,880 even liked me because I was Gil's son. So my mother, I mean, 429 00:28:59,319 --> 00:29:02,759 I've probably been open about this, but so my mother was married to 430 00:29:03,079 --> 00:29:06,839 my father for a while, Like she met him young, and then they 431 00:29:06,880 --> 00:29:12,640 were married until they had me, when she'd already been with him like four 432 00:29:12,759 --> 00:29:17,640 years. Maybe she had me at twenty three and she married him at nineteen. 433 00:29:17,720 --> 00:29:21,000 Yeah, so four years, and then four years later they got divorced. 434 00:29:21,200 --> 00:29:23,559 So she was with him for like eight years. The whole time. 435 00:29:25,799 --> 00:29:30,319 My stepfather was a very good friend of my father's I remember that, and 436 00:29:30,559 --> 00:29:33,359 lived in our guest house, like I mean kind of looked alike. Oh 437 00:29:33,440 --> 00:29:37,680 that's crazy. Yeah, my dad told me stories back in the day when 438 00:29:37,680 --> 00:29:41,240 they were roommates in New York. Uh, huh where there were college roommates 439 00:29:41,319 --> 00:29:45,200 they were, Yeah, and the he told me like one like when the 440 00:29:45,240 --> 00:29:48,519 rent was due, the landlord like, hey, to my dad, the 441 00:29:48,599 --> 00:29:51,920 rents do and he's like, okay, okay, but you know, Stanley 442 00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:53,960 has it. And then later on he would see Stanley, it's like, 443 00:29:55,039 --> 00:29:56,680 hey, the rents do. He's like, I know, I told you 444 00:29:56,799 --> 00:30:00,160 Stanley has it. Like they could do that much of like uh right, 445 00:30:00,359 --> 00:30:06,480 right, right, right, Wow. My mom has a type yes, 446 00:30:07,079 --> 00:30:14,279 yes, yes, So when she divorced my father, I mean, I 447 00:30:14,920 --> 00:30:18,799 I don't know, but he was in six months later he was she was 448 00:30:18,880 --> 00:30:23,319 living with my stepfather, got it, and then a couple of years after 449 00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:27,960 that they had my brother, and then two years later they had my sister. 450 00:30:29,000 --> 00:30:33,079 I mean they're still together like that. It obviously worked out. That's 451 00:30:33,240 --> 00:30:37,359 crazy. Yeah, yeah, like listen, they're not horrible people by any 452 00:30:37,559 --> 00:30:45,119 They're not. They're but it was just I think that you know, I 453 00:30:45,200 --> 00:30:49,319 will the way he I was. Again, I was. They weren't great 454 00:30:49,480 --> 00:30:56,160 either, and we had some chaos in the childhood and I fought all the 455 00:30:56,279 --> 00:31:00,640 time. And then my brother and my sister were young, younger, and 456 00:31:00,759 --> 00:31:07,200 I'm sure didn't love seeing all the screaming. Yeah, usually the boy kind 457 00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:11,759 of you know, shuts down and just kind of leaves at some point when 458 00:31:12,000 --> 00:31:15,720 and the girls are more of the feisty ones. That sounds that right, 459 00:31:15,799 --> 00:31:18,960 Yeah, yeah, No, I mean I remember seeing I don't remember enough, 460 00:31:19,039 --> 00:31:22,640 but I remember fights, and I remember I remember one time coming home. 461 00:31:22,920 --> 00:31:26,920 We had left the four of us, my younger sister, me, 462 00:31:26,200 --> 00:31:30,039 my mom, and my dad to go somewhere and then temple, Temple, 463 00:31:30,119 --> 00:31:33,559 and then my dad. They realized they forgot something. They were coming home, 464 00:31:33,839 --> 00:31:37,759 and I had that sinking feeling that stuff was gonna get in trouble because 465 00:31:37,759 --> 00:31:41,400 she was using the stereo or whatever, and there was a I wasn't allowed 466 00:31:41,440 --> 00:31:45,599 to use the stereo, which by the way, wasn't like I was scratching 467 00:31:45,759 --> 00:31:49,039 records or whatever. I was older, because if you were, I mean, 468 00:31:49,079 --> 00:31:52,839 I would have been like, yeah, I was like niner. It 469 00:31:52,920 --> 00:31:56,680 was. It was it was Springfields was so I was already like sixteen years 470 00:31:56,680 --> 00:32:01,079 old. Just listening to the stereo meant pushing a button that would turn it 471 00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:04,960 on, because it was like the radio or whatever. Back in those days. 472 00:32:05,359 --> 00:32:08,799 I wasn't allowed to push the button because my stepfather didn't like me and 473 00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:14,599 didn't want me touching any of his. It was like that's mine, Yes, 474 00:32:14,799 --> 00:32:17,400 my stereo, you can't use it. And it was the only stereo 475 00:32:17,480 --> 00:32:21,160 in the house. I'm pretty sure. Yeah, I think I might have 476 00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:24,240 had a little bit of a seventies mentality too. Back then. I remember 477 00:32:24,319 --> 00:32:28,640 my friend's parents. It's like, oh, they weren't allowed to touch shit, 478 00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:31,440 you know, like they're not allowed to like the stereo, or don't 479 00:32:31,519 --> 00:32:36,119 touch the thermostat, Like who came over and turned it down, Like, 480 00:32:36,319 --> 00:32:38,400 don't touch the thermostat. I don't want that person in my house anymore. 481 00:32:38,519 --> 00:32:42,920 It was very like all right, already, like my kids' friends come over 482 00:32:42,960 --> 00:32:46,799 and they're running around dropping crumbs, mobile muffin. I mean, it's a 483 00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:51,440 you know, yeah, it's a free for all. So you came home. 484 00:32:52,000 --> 00:32:53,720 So yeah, I came home and I was I was like I had 485 00:32:53,759 --> 00:32:57,519 that feeling. And then there was like they went inside and sudden there was 486 00:32:57,559 --> 00:33:00,640 a huge screaming match yelling. I think it. I think it. It 487 00:33:00,680 --> 00:33:04,440 didn't uh come out into the front yard. All I remember is it is 488 00:33:04,519 --> 00:33:07,559 just like, yeah, that was stuff that I would that's sad. I 489 00:33:07,759 --> 00:33:10,359 remember. That gives you a stomach ache, like that's so traumatizing to kids, 490 00:33:10,680 --> 00:33:15,200 and I would you know, I didn't have any of that because like 491 00:33:15,319 --> 00:33:16,720 stuff says, it's not like it was horrible and stuff like that. But 492 00:33:16,920 --> 00:33:22,920 it's like then when stuff left the house, and then I became the kind 493 00:33:22,960 --> 00:33:25,799 of the focal point, and I can be stubborn and I can be you 494 00:33:25,880 --> 00:33:30,720 know, I have I can I can wise off, and it just yeah, 495 00:33:30,759 --> 00:33:32,839 it became I became the new focal point. But like you said, 496 00:33:32,880 --> 00:33:37,480 I kind of more shut down and disappeared. I remember one time we had 497 00:33:37,519 --> 00:33:42,440 to go to a couple's therapy, my dad and I really yeah, we 498 00:33:42,559 --> 00:33:47,119 went to therapy and it was basically a chance for him just to tell me 499 00:33:47,200 --> 00:33:51,920 for fifty minutes how much I sucked. And I was like, okay, 500 00:33:52,000 --> 00:33:53,839 cool, this is this is I don't know if this is helping me as 501 00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:59,599 much as I as you think it will. But and then we ran out 502 00:33:59,640 --> 00:34:02,319 of like the discount therapy, like it was it was some deal. But 503 00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:07,119 they said we can continue if we put under Michael's name, and and then 504 00:34:07,400 --> 00:34:09,079 and then they were like, but you have to pay, and I was 505 00:34:09,159 --> 00:34:14,440 like wait what. And so the next time we came to the session. 506 00:34:14,920 --> 00:34:16,599 I didn't bring any money, and I was like, oh, I'm supposed 507 00:34:16,599 --> 00:34:20,840 to pay for this. I was like, I can't pay for it, 508 00:34:21,320 --> 00:34:24,480 and so we went in and my dad was really pissed now because he was 509 00:34:24,480 --> 00:34:28,280 like, we're trying to make this work and just started bashing. I was 510 00:34:28,320 --> 00:34:30,400 like, wait a second, this is what I'm paying for. So I 511 00:34:30,519 --> 00:34:34,519 was like I'm out of here. I got up and left and walked out, 512 00:34:34,800 --> 00:34:37,119 and I was basically just disappeared for the whole day. And I was 513 00:34:37,239 --> 00:34:40,639 like downtown Springfield and I was like go into pay phones back in the day 514 00:34:40,679 --> 00:34:45,559 on those payphones and calling my friend to pick me up. And I was 515 00:34:45,599 --> 00:34:47,519 going from house to house and I only made the mistake to go to a 516 00:34:47,599 --> 00:34:51,519 house where they knew the number. So they finally found me like twelve hours 517 00:34:51,599 --> 00:34:53,159 later, and they're like, why don't you just come home and we'll talk. 518 00:34:53,199 --> 00:34:55,480 I'm like, I'm not coming home. And so when I came home, 519 00:34:55,679 --> 00:34:59,760 I got grounded and I was like, shit, I shouldn't have come 520 00:34:59,800 --> 00:35:02,119 home. But yeah, my whole thing was he charged across the room at 521 00:35:02,159 --> 00:35:07,199 one point at you in therapy. I think he did that to me, 522 00:35:07,639 --> 00:35:09,920 not I don't think it's not in therapy. No, he charged you in 523 00:35:10,000 --> 00:35:15,559 therapy. Yeah. I was forced in there when I was sixteen when we 524 00:35:15,679 --> 00:35:20,920 did like a family therapy session, and he just he had very serious anger 525 00:35:21,000 --> 00:35:29,000 issues, very serious angry issues, I mean, very yelling and angry and 526 00:35:29,800 --> 00:35:32,320 red in the face and vain popping out. And I was really, so, 527 00:35:32,519 --> 00:35:37,280 do you think this sibling, the younger sibling, got that from him? 528 00:35:37,360 --> 00:35:38,519 I don't know, but when I was in because you don't, you 529 00:35:38,679 --> 00:35:44,119 see Michael, you seem very mellow, like I don't think he's really mellow. 530 00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:47,119 Yeah. Yeah, I'm raging right now, though I said something earlier 531 00:35:47,159 --> 00:35:51,239 that I'm really pissed at. Yeah, okay, later, all right. 532 00:35:52,599 --> 00:35:58,239 When I was in therapy for myself, like at like sixteen, I remember 533 00:35:58,320 --> 00:36:00,159 the therapist saying and I was always like, I don't understand, like my 534 00:36:00,239 --> 00:36:05,280 whole family hates me, like they don't like me, my stepfather hates me, 535 00:36:05,559 --> 00:36:08,360 and they I am to blame for all these things. And the therapist 536 00:36:08,519 --> 00:36:13,360 was like, you're what they call the identified problem, like when there's any 537 00:36:13,480 --> 00:36:16,519 problems in the family, because I was like, everybody seems perfect and they 538 00:36:16,559 --> 00:36:21,559 all get along perfect except for me. And then She explained to me this 539 00:36:21,760 --> 00:36:27,559 thing called the identified problem where whatever issues because I was like, my parents, 540 00:36:27,840 --> 00:36:31,280 my mother and stepfather never fight, never, and she was like, 541 00:36:31,519 --> 00:36:37,559 that's because whatever tensions arise, they think they blame you for. And she 542 00:36:37,719 --> 00:36:42,480 said, mark my words, when you leave the house somebody else that it 543 00:36:42,639 --> 00:36:45,159 has to go somewhere. But I didn't even believe it. And it wasn't 544 00:36:45,239 --> 00:36:49,519 until years later that my brother told me about like some of the fights that 545 00:36:49,599 --> 00:36:55,000 he would have because they it's in from my estimation from what I observed, 546 00:36:55,719 --> 00:36:59,480 he was never in trouble. My sister was never in trouble, like it 547 00:36:59,599 --> 00:37:02,760 was only me. I constantly mad at me. If I came home one 548 00:37:02,840 --> 00:37:07,719 minute late, I was grounded, like the focus was on me, So 549 00:37:07,880 --> 00:37:10,360 I was not happy. But I remember being like, wait, what, 550 00:37:12,079 --> 00:37:15,880 Like he's like, oh oh, we have like almost physically challenged each other. 551 00:37:15,159 --> 00:37:19,079 Yeah, I mean to be fair. When when that time was going 552 00:37:19,119 --> 00:37:22,559 on, I was perfect, So I get why you would seen me and 553 00:37:22,679 --> 00:37:27,159 go he's perfect. But then I think I became too perfect and my dad 554 00:37:27,280 --> 00:37:30,440 it just yeah right, yeah, but what did it happen right away after 555 00:37:30,519 --> 00:37:34,119 I left? Or I think it happened. I mean Honestly, I think 556 00:37:34,199 --> 00:37:37,000 it's part of it with him and I and I don't know, It's just 557 00:37:37,079 --> 00:37:39,920 that I was growing up. You grow up and you start to become rebellious 558 00:37:39,960 --> 00:37:45,920 and you're not the little boy anymore. And I think he just did not 559 00:37:45,280 --> 00:37:49,119 like, you know, you hit hit a certain age and you sort of 560 00:37:49,199 --> 00:37:52,440 like talk back or you sort of stand up for yourself, and you know, 561 00:37:52,559 --> 00:37:54,320 Yeah, there was that time when I was like, he had a 562 00:37:54,400 --> 00:37:58,280 dark group. So the basement. The basement was my area. That's where 563 00:37:58,280 --> 00:38:00,599 I watched TV. That's where I hung out. You know. My friends 564 00:38:00,639 --> 00:38:02,039 would come to the window and knock on the window to be like come on 565 00:38:02,119 --> 00:38:06,039 out. Let's like, let's get out of here. So I was never 566 00:38:06,599 --> 00:38:07,679 up in the main area. I was in the basement or in my room. 567 00:38:08,480 --> 00:38:12,400 But he had his dark room back there, and I was back with 568 00:38:12,480 --> 00:38:15,159 the box where you had to like press the buttons for the you know, 569 00:38:15,400 --> 00:38:20,559 cable, and he had it like tethered into his dark room. So he 570 00:38:20,639 --> 00:38:23,800 was watching some baseball game. I came down to my room. I was 571 00:38:23,920 --> 00:38:28,239 like, I'm just going to check things. So I went to go check 572 00:38:28,440 --> 00:38:30,840 something else that was on. But you had to go like toggle ab. 573 00:38:30,119 --> 00:38:36,320 It was just a whole It was a whole mess, but bursting out and 574 00:38:36,320 --> 00:38:37,199 he was like, why isn't the baseball game. I'm like, it's a 575 00:38:37,199 --> 00:38:40,280 commercial. I'm watching it. I was like it's a commercial, dude, 576 00:38:40,400 --> 00:38:44,480 Like you know, I'm just checking to see something else on. He got 577 00:38:44,559 --> 00:38:45,000 all mad. He told me to get out of here. I'm like, 578 00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:47,320 I don't have to get out of here. And that became like that hole. 579 00:38:49,599 --> 00:38:50,840 He was like, get out of here. So I was on the 580 00:38:50,880 --> 00:38:52,800 stairs saying I'm not getting out of here, and he would. Then that's 581 00:38:52,840 --> 00:38:55,320 when he was like physically trying to get me up the stairs. And then 582 00:38:55,360 --> 00:39:00,800 we got into a big altercation in the kitchen where mom had to break us 583 00:39:00,880 --> 00:39:02,760 up. And I was like, yeah, like that and that's like that 584 00:39:02,920 --> 00:39:06,400 was like Jesus, I'm not you know, next time, I'll just I 585 00:39:06,440 --> 00:39:12,199 guess I'll get out of there. Wow. So sad. You guys came 586 00:39:12,239 --> 00:39:16,239 out so like totally normal. Well, one thing that was very helpful was 587 00:39:16,320 --> 00:39:21,000 having each other. Yeah, and I left when he was pretty young. 588 00:39:21,639 --> 00:39:24,280 You were eleven. Did you have guilt leaving him? No, She's out 589 00:39:24,280 --> 00:39:29,119 of there. Well, it wasn't that I didn't have it. I felt 590 00:39:29,159 --> 00:39:31,639 bad. I remember my sister, who was nine at the time, writing 591 00:39:31,719 --> 00:39:35,880 me this note and saying how much she was gonna miss me. I mean, 592 00:39:36,159 --> 00:39:38,400 I didn't realize that they were actually sad. I didn't feel wanted, 593 00:39:38,719 --> 00:39:43,000 is honest to god. I felt like everybody's gonna be I mean, my 594 00:39:43,159 --> 00:39:45,639 mom couldn't wait to get me the fuck out. She was charging me rent 595 00:39:45,719 --> 00:39:49,639 at the time, and she was like, you cannot stay here. So 596 00:39:50,239 --> 00:39:53,559 when I moved, I mean, Gil was probably not speaking to me at 597 00:39:53,599 --> 00:39:57,480 the time at all. He hardly ever was speaking to me. So I 598 00:39:57,639 --> 00:40:01,079 was like, everybody's gonna be happy that I'm gone. And obviously I didn't 599 00:40:01,079 --> 00:40:05,159 have like a close relationship with my brother at that time. He was a 600 00:40:05,360 --> 00:40:09,719 young kid. But then I would come back home like yearly for Thanksgiving or 601 00:40:09,760 --> 00:40:13,440 whatever, and he and I would talk, and as time went on, 602 00:40:13,519 --> 00:40:16,559 I was like, we have like the same sense of humor and yeah, 603 00:40:16,599 --> 00:40:21,679 and then we just started getting closer, like every year. And I remember 604 00:40:21,719 --> 00:40:25,719 when he graduated college. I guess I came home for I remember that we 605 00:40:25,840 --> 00:40:30,760 got we really talked then, and I was like, and we started and 606 00:40:30,800 --> 00:40:36,199 then we started like more keeping in touch. You left me a letter because 607 00:40:36,199 --> 00:40:38,320 I was at summer camp when you left. So I came home like I 608 00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:40,800 was gone for the month and I came home and was I remember there was 609 00:40:40,840 --> 00:40:45,840 a letter from you, and it meant a lot to me. Oh it 610 00:40:46,039 --> 00:40:51,400 was so nice. So keeping hard on myself. I needed the envelope. 611 00:40:51,440 --> 00:40:53,039 That's why I was because you hadn't sealed it. I was like, that 612 00:40:53,159 --> 00:40:58,280 means a lot. She's let me recycle the envelope. She'd take another break, 613 00:40:58,519 --> 00:41:04,840 Yeah, take a break. Yeah, I think though that looking back. 614 00:41:05,639 --> 00:41:09,440 Once my brother and I got closer and then we moved across the country. 615 00:41:09,639 --> 00:41:13,440 He he, I was already living in LA and then he moved across 616 00:41:13,480 --> 00:41:17,679 the country. And then that's been very healing, you know, to have 617 00:41:17,800 --> 00:41:22,639 a close relationship with him, and we've been through a lot together and like 618 00:41:22,760 --> 00:41:27,039 had our had kids, and he you know, helped me so much with 619 00:41:27,239 --> 00:41:30,800 my kids and like when my when Elbie was in the hospital when she was 620 00:41:30,840 --> 00:41:32,880 a little baby, and like he was always the one I called, you 621 00:41:32,960 --> 00:41:37,199 know, and then now he and his wife, you know, that's like 622 00:41:37,360 --> 00:41:42,480 my first call when there was and I think vice versa, and you know, 623 00:41:42,960 --> 00:41:46,519 I think I think it helped me realize that I was capable of having 624 00:41:46,920 --> 00:41:50,679 family relate, you know what I mean. It's like it's so different as 625 00:41:50,719 --> 00:41:53,719 adults than it was when we were kids, right right, and the I 626 00:41:53,840 --> 00:42:00,920 think some of the way we grew up was obviously toxic and gave us both 627 00:42:00,039 --> 00:42:06,880 different images of ourselves. It's hard to see yourself as somebody who can be 628 00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:10,239 a great dad or be a great mom or you know. And I think 629 00:42:10,320 --> 00:42:15,159 we've helped each other. I think, yeah, when I looked up to 630 00:42:15,199 --> 00:42:16,119 stuff, I mean, you know, you may not know that, but 631 00:42:16,199 --> 00:42:21,360 I looked up to her because she was my older sister and she was cool, 632 00:42:21,559 --> 00:42:24,679 and you know, when she left I it was always like this utopia. 633 00:42:24,760 --> 00:42:27,800 She was out in La doing her thing. You know, when she 634 00:42:27,840 --> 00:42:31,599 started doing stand up I watched stand up comedy all the time, so just 635 00:42:31,679 --> 00:42:36,400 to like kind of bond with her through that like that way, and she 636 00:42:36,480 --> 00:42:38,920 would send me tapes and see, you know, like she got me into 637 00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:43,599 Depeche mode, like I just ah, yeah, I was so cute, 638 00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:46,800 Like yeah, I was, I was into I always looked up to her. 639 00:42:46,840 --> 00:42:49,880 So I don't know if she ever knew that because of the whole whatever 640 00:42:50,039 --> 00:42:52,760 was going on, but yeah, when my wife when we were dating, 641 00:42:54,199 --> 00:42:59,039 meeting steph was the bigger deal for her. She knew that meeting stuff. 642 00:42:59,039 --> 00:43:01,119 If she didn't get in, if Stephane didn't like her, she was screwged. 643 00:43:01,400 --> 00:43:05,239 She wasn't as worried about my parents. She was worried about what stuff. 644 00:43:05,639 --> 00:43:07,239 Yeah, I could see funny and I liked her right away. I 645 00:43:07,360 --> 00:43:10,320 was like, Oh, she's funny, Like she's funny. She's like super 646 00:43:10,400 --> 00:43:16,079 outgoing. And then my brother and I, I don't know, somehow we 647 00:43:16,199 --> 00:43:21,639 were going to dinner or something, and she got very insecure because I think 648 00:43:21,719 --> 00:43:23,360 she thought that I was going to tell you to break up with her or 649 00:43:23,440 --> 00:43:27,840 something. I remember that we went to we went we went out to sushi, 650 00:43:27,920 --> 00:43:30,760 and then I didn't know the whole time she was at home freaking out. 651 00:43:30,880 --> 00:43:35,159 And when I came home, she was like, thought that I was 652 00:43:35,239 --> 00:43:37,039 going to see steph because I was talking about how we need to break up 653 00:43:37,119 --> 00:43:40,880 and stuff like that. That's what I was going to do. But I 654 00:43:42,079 --> 00:43:45,960 can't prove her. Right later, I feel like she and I talked about 655 00:43:45,960 --> 00:43:49,039 it and I was like, no, he was telling me like, oh 656 00:43:49,119 --> 00:43:52,480 my god, she's so amazing. I'm in love with her like, yeah, 657 00:43:52,039 --> 00:43:57,000 that's awesome, but yeah she does. Do you know the Brad story, 658 00:43:57,079 --> 00:44:01,599 right, the Gina bro story. No, so there was So Gina 659 00:44:01,679 --> 00:44:04,920 is her best friend. I'm sure she'd like to tell the story at the 660 00:44:04,920 --> 00:44:07,360 time. So it's fine. Gina is her best friend, her maid of 661 00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:09,360 honor. And you know, all of us would hang out watch football. 662 00:44:09,519 --> 00:44:15,199 And it was eighteen twenty years ago for the Super Bowl. We're watching the 663 00:44:15,199 --> 00:44:19,599 Super Bowl, but no one could really watch that year. Raquel had to 664 00:44:19,679 --> 00:44:23,280 go work. She was working at the Kodak Theater and I had one friend 665 00:44:23,320 --> 00:44:25,400 over but he had to leave, so it was just me and Gina watching 666 00:44:25,639 --> 00:44:31,000 watching the game. Gina notoriously gets hot. Her her core temperature goes up. 667 00:44:31,079 --> 00:44:34,639 There's been many times when she just leaves to go take a shower so 668 00:44:34,719 --> 00:44:38,119 she get her temperature downe We're living in like this not so great apartment down 669 00:44:38,199 --> 00:44:42,920 in like Western and Melrose, like there was no air conditioning and it was 670 00:44:43,079 --> 00:44:50,239 just so. Raquel came home and unbeknownst to us, she had noticed that 671 00:44:50,360 --> 00:44:52,719 Gena's bra was had she taken her broth and we were just watching the game. 672 00:44:52,760 --> 00:44:54,599 We had like a good time. We enjoyed the game. It was 673 00:44:54,639 --> 00:44:57,960 a lot of fun. It was the Janet Jackson year. Oh yeah, 674 00:44:58,599 --> 00:45:02,679 yeah. She was trying to recreate the genia. She's like, this is 675 00:45:02,719 --> 00:45:05,039 what happened. I was like, no, no, no, this is 676 00:45:05,079 --> 00:45:10,440 what happened. So we kept showing Raquel that over and over. So then 677 00:45:10,559 --> 00:45:14,519 but yeah, Raquel came in and she didn't say anything, and she just 678 00:45:14,559 --> 00:45:16,000 went in the back room, you know, into our bedroom and she just 679 00:45:16,039 --> 00:45:22,559 started watching uh International, house Hunters International or whatever and just sat there. 680 00:45:22,360 --> 00:45:27,639 And then later we found out that she saw the bra and thought we had 681 00:45:27,639 --> 00:45:31,480 an affair and went in the back and was like all this crazy stuff. 682 00:45:31,840 --> 00:45:36,559 And she told us and we're like what but your reaction was to go in 683 00:45:36,639 --> 00:45:39,400 the back and watch Internet, you know international. So yeah, so there's 684 00:45:39,440 --> 00:45:47,639 there's that's hilarious. Wow, Wow, that's funny. Yeah, Gina is 685 00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:52,199 married to their friend. I know, but I was trying to I was 686 00:45:52,320 --> 00:45:55,880 like, was that was Jeff Originally? Jeff was originally Rockel's friend, right, 687 00:45:57,159 --> 00:45:59,920 yeah, he was like he because he he reviewed he reviews theater, 688 00:46:00,159 --> 00:46:04,519 so she knew. Okay, so they got together. Jeff is and Jeff 689 00:46:04,639 --> 00:46:08,719 is my friend too. That because we see them Everythanksgiving. Every Thanksgiving. 690 00:46:08,800 --> 00:46:14,559 This is our core group. Jeff and Gina, Me and John and the 691 00:46:14,639 --> 00:46:17,679 kids, and my brother and Raquel and their kids. Right. And Jeff 692 00:46:19,079 --> 00:46:23,079 is a is a film professor basically at community college. And he was the 693 00:46:23,159 --> 00:46:27,320 one that I think I told that was like, Okay, Elbe needs to 694 00:46:27,360 --> 00:46:30,519 go to community college, Like this is actually a great thing. He's like 695 00:46:30,679 --> 00:46:36,039 super pro community college and like all about how she's going to save money, 696 00:46:36,159 --> 00:46:39,639 and and Elbe just like did not want to hear it. The Thanksgiving that 697 00:46:39,800 --> 00:46:45,199 she was doing applications and she's like ah blah blah blah blah. And then 698 00:46:45,400 --> 00:46:49,199 but anyway, Jeff's been the one that's really helpful that like has a really 699 00:46:49,239 --> 00:46:52,559 good friend that's in the transfer department that's just like anything you need, it's 700 00:46:52,719 --> 00:46:55,920 he's been like a really good connection. Oh that's good. It's good to 701 00:46:57,039 --> 00:47:00,639 have. Yeah, And Gena and I were friends before Raquel and I. 702 00:47:00,800 --> 00:47:05,280 Raquel Raquel and I didn't like each other at first because we were in the 703 00:47:05,360 --> 00:47:09,760 same restaurant and she thought I was she didn't like my dry humor, and 704 00:47:09,960 --> 00:47:14,639 I thought she was too loud, and so we just sort of just couldn't 705 00:47:15,400 --> 00:47:16,920 we just we just yeah. It was just like she you know, she 706 00:47:17,039 --> 00:47:20,719 was loud. She I mean she would walk into like the backstation, like 707 00:47:20,800 --> 00:47:24,400 moving to Vaginas. I'm walk coming in person and I'm making my dry, 708 00:47:24,599 --> 00:47:29,119 sarcastic remarks and she's like, I don't get dry humor, Like you either 709 00:47:29,159 --> 00:47:32,039 have to say vaginas or I don't get it right. And then we just 710 00:47:32,119 --> 00:47:36,760 started flirting because because Gina would always be like, let's hang out, and 711 00:47:37,159 --> 00:47:38,559 I was the new guy at the restaurant and like, let's hang out with 712 00:47:38,639 --> 00:47:42,039 Mike. And She's like, I don't want to hang out with Mike. 713 00:47:42,119 --> 00:47:45,360 And I was like, okay, I guess. And then we just sort 714 00:47:45,400 --> 00:47:49,639 of started flirting and suddenly we were like, oh, I mean, you're 715 00:47:49,719 --> 00:47:52,679 loud, but I could look I can, I can look past it. 716 00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:57,119 I can. I can tune out right right. She's very funny. She 717 00:47:57,400 --> 00:48:00,679 has come up with so many saying I don't know where she gets it, 718 00:48:00,760 --> 00:48:04,119 but she was the one who was just like, hey, you make sack 719 00:48:04,159 --> 00:48:09,400 of SuDS. She also mixes up saying sometimes. There was one time she 720 00:48:09,679 --> 00:48:13,800 told my dad that was back when we're all obvious saying out, but she 721 00:48:13,920 --> 00:48:15,840 told him it was something was something was so funny. He would drop dead 722 00:48:15,840 --> 00:48:20,599 in his pants and we were like, it's that funny. You dropped dead 723 00:48:20,639 --> 00:48:22,519 right in your pants. That's hilarious. So even now I'm like, oh 724 00:48:22,599 --> 00:48:27,199 man, I'm gonna drop dead in my pants. I love that she came 725 00:48:27,320 --> 00:48:30,639 up with calling if you have to peek calling it, I gotta take a 726 00:48:30,679 --> 00:48:34,760 sizzle. Oh I love that too. Yeah, and it's stuck. There's 727 00:48:34,840 --> 00:48:38,159 so many rocks that we Yeah, you gotta sizzle. You got to sizzle 728 00:48:38,239 --> 00:48:42,559 before we go, because it makes a sizzling sound when youird it does you 729 00:48:42,679 --> 00:48:45,639 peek so many things that she just naturally. I don't know where she gets 730 00:48:45,679 --> 00:48:49,800 them. I don't know some of them. She just mixes them up and 731 00:48:49,880 --> 00:48:52,360 then they just, you know, this come out right and it sounds fine. 732 00:48:52,440 --> 00:48:55,199 It's like you just sometimes I'm like, just don't delve too far into 733 00:48:55,239 --> 00:48:59,280 it. I'll hear on phone calls and she'll do a saying, saying and 734 00:48:59,400 --> 00:49:01,400 she's mixed up the saying, and I'm just like, but she just keeps 735 00:49:01,480 --> 00:49:06,960 going so that if you've noticed it, it's too late, like you and 736 00:49:07,039 --> 00:49:08,079 I don't. I'm just like, yeah, just keep going, Just don't 737 00:49:08,199 --> 00:49:12,280 commit to it, she commits to Yes, it's impressed. That's good. 738 00:49:12,480 --> 00:49:17,039 Yeah. So years ago, so my brother did stand up too, and 739 00:49:17,199 --> 00:49:24,119 he had some really funny jokes. Tell us the do the cowjoke? You 740 00:49:24,239 --> 00:49:29,960 remember it? Yes, it's always you know I did the cow joke? 741 00:49:30,039 --> 00:49:31,800 Did I ever tell you? The cowjoke is never a good starter? I 742 00:49:31,880 --> 00:49:37,320 started one time with comedy my set. It throws off the whole Yeah, 743 00:49:38,039 --> 00:49:40,159 oh, you know what we have to talk about. Okay, but do 744 00:49:40,280 --> 00:49:44,679 the cowjoke. And then we have to tell them the story of when you 745 00:49:44,760 --> 00:49:50,360 did stand up about our parents, the friend of your parents. Yeah, 746 00:49:50,400 --> 00:49:52,360 well we got to tell you the story. Okay, So you have a 747 00:49:52,440 --> 00:49:53,599 cowjoke, the cow jokes, Well, it's not a joke. I mean, 748 00:49:53,639 --> 00:49:58,199 it's real, right, It's from my life because I had a pet 749 00:49:58,239 --> 00:50:01,280 cow when I was growing up. Yeah, and I really love that cow. 750 00:50:01,960 --> 00:50:07,440 Like me and the cow. We did everything together, Like when I 751 00:50:07,440 --> 00:50:09,559 would come home from school, the cow is waiting for me in the mornings, 752 00:50:09,599 --> 00:50:12,800 the cow would walk me to school. It was just like it was 753 00:50:12,880 --> 00:50:20,400 a classic tale of a boy and his cow. And then one time the 754 00:50:20,480 --> 00:50:24,960 cow went out for a pack of cigarettes and it never came back. That's 755 00:50:27,000 --> 00:50:30,719 the thing about cows, you know, like they'll rip your heart out, 756 00:50:31,639 --> 00:50:37,280 chew it up, swallow it to their first stomach, bring it back up, 757 00:50:37,960 --> 00:50:40,840 trying it some more, and then you know, swallow to the second 758 00:50:40,880 --> 00:50:44,519 stomach and just you just never know when they're gonna be done with your right. 759 00:50:44,760 --> 00:50:47,880 Yeah, wow, that's good. Yeah, I will never love another 760 00:50:47,920 --> 00:50:55,199 cow again. So he had the he wrote these jokes that were like about 761 00:50:55,400 --> 00:51:00,480 our parents. So there's a lot of hippie jokes, but my parents being 762 00:51:00,559 --> 00:51:06,039 hippie and my dad not having a job. So yeah, well yeah, 763 00:51:06,079 --> 00:51:08,239 I'm trying to remember. Oh yeah, so my dad like, if you 764 00:51:08,320 --> 00:51:13,320 want to get a sense of my dad, picture a guy who looks like 765 00:51:13,400 --> 00:51:17,039 he's from zz Top with the big long beard minus the rock star income, 766 00:51:17,239 --> 00:51:22,800 yeah, or any income whatsoever. Wow. And if you want to picture 767 00:51:22,840 --> 00:51:27,679 my mom, picture a woman who'd be attracted to a guy that looks like 768 00:51:27,719 --> 00:51:32,360 he's from zz Top and has no money. So I was doing those jokes 769 00:51:32,400 --> 00:51:36,760 in front of them, and then he and then a joke about smoking pot, 770 00:51:36,920 --> 00:51:40,519 about pot, and yeah, where are the rolling papers? Yeah? 771 00:51:42,280 --> 00:51:44,679 What was that with the rolling papers? And then he was like, oh, 772 00:51:44,719 --> 00:51:46,239 you got to ask your mom, that's your mom's department or something. 773 00:51:46,480 --> 00:51:50,440 Huh. Yeah. There was also one with like you know, my dad 774 00:51:50,440 --> 00:51:52,679 would always get frustrated because they'd only bring out the good rolling papers when company 775 00:51:52,760 --> 00:51:55,480 was around, but he really couldn't say anything because he didn't pay for it. 776 00:51:55,960 --> 00:52:01,679 So my mom loved all these. She has a good sense of so 777 00:52:01,800 --> 00:52:06,599 she no, I don't think she'd heard them at this time. So my 778 00:52:06,840 --> 00:52:10,920 parents were he was doing this a show at the improv. We all came 779 00:52:10,960 --> 00:52:14,400 to see him and I was like, what are you going to Are you 780 00:52:14,480 --> 00:52:17,639 going to do those jokes because that was like a main part of mainstay. 781 00:52:19,719 --> 00:52:22,679 Yeah, and he was like nothing else right, and it was the most 782 00:52:22,880 --> 00:52:27,119 tense. I was like, what is going to happen? Like these are 783 00:52:27,280 --> 00:52:31,239 like some intense jokes about like my dad has no money, like doesn't have 784 00:52:31,320 --> 00:52:38,440 a job and so. And they they laughed, thought it was the most 785 00:52:38,679 --> 00:52:45,199 the funniest thing. That's good that they have a sense of humor. I 786 00:52:45,280 --> 00:52:49,960 don't know, I don't know, but they're also very oblivious. Like okay, 787 00:52:50,199 --> 00:52:55,039 quick story. My sister wrote this story. I wish I wish this 788 00:52:55,320 --> 00:52:59,760 this should be more for Patreon, but in a nutshell my sister wrote this 789 00:52:59,800 --> 00:53:04,239 story worry about some very bad behavior on her part that we knew about. 790 00:53:04,400 --> 00:53:07,719 We knew that she was doing this bad behavior, but my mom has kind 791 00:53:07,719 --> 00:53:10,760 of had my sister on a pedestal, so she wrote this story that was 792 00:53:10,920 --> 00:53:15,280 like if you read it, you'd be like, holy shit. But she 793 00:53:15,440 --> 00:53:19,960 pretended it was like fiction. And then my mom was like, oh my 794 00:53:20,239 --> 00:53:24,599 god, your sister wrote this amazing story like ah, her imagination, you 795 00:53:24,679 --> 00:53:30,119 know, and it like we were like what, like that's that's true, 796 00:53:30,320 --> 00:53:31,400 Like this is how she lives her life. And my mom was like, 797 00:53:31,480 --> 00:53:34,960 oh, she's the best, she's the greatest. You need to help her 798 00:53:35,000 --> 00:53:37,639 get a publishing deal. Yeah wow. And it was so she tends to 799 00:53:37,840 --> 00:53:43,400 not think things are right, so she probably thought like that he was just 800 00:53:43,639 --> 00:53:47,400 what a funny funny jokes? Those are just those aren't observations right right. 801 00:53:47,960 --> 00:53:52,079 I do remember my dad going to see me just him at one club and 802 00:53:52,480 --> 00:53:55,920 then afterwards, you know, I was like, you know, you crave, 803 00:53:57,079 --> 00:53:59,119 like how do you think you know? How was it? He was 804 00:53:59,159 --> 00:54:01,320 like, oh it was good. The other that band that did this other 805 00:54:01,360 --> 00:54:04,760 thing, they were really great. I'm like yeah, cool, But you 806 00:54:04,800 --> 00:54:07,199 know, just like I wanted more about me, but he kept Yeah, 807 00:54:07,480 --> 00:54:09,559 we really like that that band. I think they were good. Right, 808 00:54:10,480 --> 00:54:14,800 Well, you know the story of me, of her coming to see me 809 00:54:15,119 --> 00:54:16,920 at a show when she was out here visiting. This is before she lived 810 00:54:16,960 --> 00:54:20,760 here. She'd hardly I don't think I think she'd see me do stand up 811 00:54:20,840 --> 00:54:23,880 like one maybe once or twice came out. I was at the comedy store 812 00:54:24,320 --> 00:54:29,320 and she did not say anything about me, and then she said, oh, 813 00:54:29,400 --> 00:54:31,960 that other girl was really funny. She was talking about Lisa, and 814 00:54:32,039 --> 00:54:35,880 she was like, oh, she was hilarious. And we ended up in 815 00:54:35,920 --> 00:54:38,840 a fight about it because I later I was because then I was upset. 816 00:54:39,199 --> 00:54:44,639 Yeah, like nothing not, you were great, you were so funny. 817 00:54:44,760 --> 00:54:47,440 Oh, let's talk about the other people. It is just as common courtesy 818 00:54:47,760 --> 00:54:52,480 if you watch somebody do something, the first thing you say is like, 819 00:54:52,719 --> 00:54:55,079 your thing was so good, you were so great, that was so fun 820 00:54:55,480 --> 00:54:59,519 Oh, let's break down the other thing we saw too, right right right, 821 00:54:59,599 --> 00:55:02,880 Like if you went to go see John Stewart and John Mullaney and you 822 00:55:04,519 --> 00:55:07,280 say nothing to John Stewart and you're just like, oh my god, John 823 00:55:07,360 --> 00:55:13,639 Mullaney was halle and you never say anything even John Stewart would be like, 824 00:55:14,079 --> 00:55:19,480 okay, what I do that's my mother, yes, yeah, And later 825 00:55:19,719 --> 00:55:23,280 I said that really hurt my feelings, like you never said anything, and 826 00:55:23,400 --> 00:55:28,400 then she still didn't. She was like, well, I mean you know 827 00:55:28,519 --> 00:55:30,199 how I feel or something, and I was like, no, I don't. 828 00:55:30,639 --> 00:55:35,320 So that's so that's yeah, that tracks does track well. He they 829 00:55:35,360 --> 00:55:37,679 saw me in a play when in college, and I guess my mom told 830 00:55:37,679 --> 00:55:40,239 me later because he didn't say anyth to me, but he was like, 831 00:55:42,480 --> 00:55:45,320 was going on about me, like like felt like I was like de neroesque 832 00:55:45,440 --> 00:55:49,360 and whatever I was doing. Wow, but not to you, not to 833 00:55:49,440 --> 00:55:53,360 me. See, isn't that interesting? Like they'll talk to other people about 834 00:55:53,400 --> 00:55:58,840 but they don't have twitch pride or something. My mom not say anything to 835 00:55:58,920 --> 00:56:02,840 you personally. Yeah, my mom was always big on talking about us because 836 00:56:02,840 --> 00:56:07,400 it's it's then it becomes an extension of her pride thing. Like I remember 837 00:56:07,440 --> 00:56:12,199 when they were in Japan and she would always talk about her children and what 838 00:56:12,239 --> 00:56:14,960 they were up to. But it wasn't you know, it wasn't like to 839 00:56:15,159 --> 00:56:17,599 us, but you got that. You knew that it was because I didn't 840 00:56:17,639 --> 00:56:23,079 focus back on her right on her interesting that's interesting. Yeah, but you 841 00:56:23,199 --> 00:56:29,519 know what, to bring this full circle, my brother has done a lot 842 00:56:29,559 --> 00:56:34,320 of things. Used to do like some ghostwriting. You've written proposals for people 843 00:56:34,440 --> 00:56:37,400 when I was writing books, and then he got into TV and he's made 844 00:56:37,400 --> 00:56:43,199 it. He's like very successful. I love that. Yeah, he'd never 845 00:56:43,360 --> 00:56:46,119 let anything like hold him back. Yeah, both of you. And he's 846 00:56:46,199 --> 00:56:51,039 a loving husband. And he's a great dad. Oh my god, he's 847 00:56:51,119 --> 00:56:54,159 like the best dad. His kids are super like dad focused. Yes, 848 00:56:54,920 --> 00:56:59,800 yes, there. Raquel was out of town this weekend and Beckett was like, 849 00:57:00,199 --> 00:57:00,960 I'm gonna be sleeping in your bed. I'm like, well, you 850 00:57:01,039 --> 00:57:04,119 can sleep in your bed, and then come it's like nope, I'm just 851 00:57:04,119 --> 00:57:06,480 gonna sleep in your bed. And then Emerson was like I'm gonna sleep in 852 00:57:06,480 --> 00:57:07,880 your bed and like, no, you're gonna wake up and you need me, 853 00:57:08,239 --> 00:57:13,000 then you can call me. And on Saturday or Sunday morning, I 854 00:57:13,119 --> 00:57:16,079 looked over and they were both like cuddled up all the stuff. Yeah, 855 00:57:16,400 --> 00:57:21,800 it's so cute. Oh, they love them some. Michael. Well, 856 00:57:22,000 --> 00:57:25,679 it's amazing and interesting that you two both turned out to have to be great 857 00:57:25,840 --> 00:57:31,719 parents in the you know, considering well, no, it's true, though, 858 00:57:31,840 --> 00:57:36,880 you guys are great parents, and look at your example. You didn't 859 00:57:36,880 --> 00:57:39,280 have a great example, obviously, Well look at you. You're a great 860 00:57:39,360 --> 00:57:43,880 parent, and you didn't have like the best example. I mean I had 861 00:57:43,920 --> 00:57:46,519 a good dad. Yeah, my dad and I were close. But yeah, 862 00:57:47,599 --> 00:57:52,039 but well is there? How do we do? Do you want people 863 00:57:52,079 --> 00:57:58,639 to follow you on Instagram? I give a TikTok channel. I don't. 864 00:57:58,760 --> 00:58:00,320 I've been trying to start a TikTok channel, but I do not. I 865 00:58:00,400 --> 00:58:05,400 have my Pella clown TikTok that I haven't gotten off the ground. But then 866 00:58:05,559 --> 00:58:08,400 Instagram, I have my mustache videos. Okay, well what's your Instagram handle? 867 00:58:08,440 --> 00:58:14,079 I don't have no idea. Michael Wilder sixty nine or I don't, 868 00:58:14,119 --> 00:58:15,920 but I don't know why sixty nine I don't. It wasn't sexual. I 869 00:58:16,039 --> 00:58:21,280 just think I was doing it fast, right right, I think not that 870 00:58:21,320 --> 00:58:24,800 you should do that fast? Right? This is getting bad? But yeah, 871 00:58:25,000 --> 00:58:29,880 I'm in the Facebook group. Okay, there are some Mustache and Me 872 00:58:30,039 --> 00:58:32,480 videos which are yes, okay, funny. And that's a huge tailor swift 873 00:58:32,519 --> 00:58:35,960 that he's a swift. Oh you're a swift. I'm a huge swift. 874 00:58:36,039 --> 00:58:37,559 Ye, yes, oh, that's so cute. And he loves jewel. 875 00:58:38,360 --> 00:58:40,719 I love jewel too, do you? Oh yeah, oh yeah. I've 876 00:58:40,760 --> 00:58:45,679 been to three of her concerts, really Hollywood Bowl. I just saw her 877 00:58:46,119 --> 00:58:52,840 in Irvine and then I saw her in ninety six. I was working in 878 00:58:52,880 --> 00:58:55,920 New York City, New York and on the radio they were talking about how 879 00:58:55,960 --> 00:59:00,559 she was playing the Beacon Theater. So I told the bus boy to watch 880 00:59:00,679 --> 00:59:02,400 the restaurant because there was no one in there, and I walked all the 881 00:59:02,440 --> 00:59:07,000 way to the Beacon Theater and bought tickets to go. Wow, oh that's 882 00:59:07,039 --> 00:59:12,159 so nice. Then I became a big swiftie. That's great. Yeah, 883 00:59:12,519 --> 00:59:16,400 where's your bracelets? I have t shirts, no bracelets. And then there's 884 00:59:16,440 --> 00:59:20,000 a big picture in my girl. You've seen the picture in the garage, 885 00:59:20,119 --> 00:59:23,679 right, Yes, I have seen there was it's a three panel picture. 886 00:59:24,440 --> 00:59:28,519 Uh. Someone found it and they brought it to me as a gift, 887 00:59:29,119 --> 00:59:30,320 and Raquel was like, great, that's going to go in the trash and 888 00:59:30,320 --> 00:59:32,840 I was like, no, that's going to go in the in our house 889 00:59:32,960 --> 00:59:37,360 like I can in the kitchen. So we've compromised on the garage. But 890 00:59:37,440 --> 00:59:39,679 yeah, it's a that's so cool. Oh, thank you, Michael. 891 00:59:39,800 --> 00:59:44,079 Thanks you for driving all the way down here. We really appreciate it. 892 00:59:44,239 --> 00:59:46,719 No, I'm glad to be here. Thank you, Yes, okay, 893 00:59:46,800 --> 00:59:49,519 par and everybody, don't f it up.