WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.240 --> 00:00:04.200 So I am often a third wheel or a fifth wheel. I often I 2 00:00:04.240 --> 00:00:08.240 go out with couples a lot because most of my friends are married. Yeah, 3 00:00:08.279 --> 00:00:10.919 I'm one of them. You are one of the You are one of 4 00:00:10.919 --> 00:00:17.320 my wheels. You are one third of my tricycle. That's right. Actually, 5 00:00:17.320 --> 00:00:19.920 I think that's the sex thing. I didn't mean it's way No, 6 00:00:19.960 --> 00:00:23.879 it's tripod. They call me pod. Got it, got it, got 7 00:00:23.879 --> 00:00:26.679 it right, right, right. But this thing happens, and it probably 8 00:00:26.679 --> 00:00:30.199 happens to you too, like when you're with other couples. But this funny 9 00:00:30.199 --> 00:00:33.399 thing happens. It happens a lot because I spend so much time with couples 10 00:00:33.960 --> 00:00:39.960 that we'll be having a like normal conversation and I'll say something that I don't 11 00:00:40.039 --> 00:00:45.000 know is a landmine between the two of them. And I can't tell you 12 00:00:45.159 --> 00:00:48.799 enough how it's the most innocuous thing. How it's like it's like, yeah, 13 00:00:48.799 --> 00:00:51.200 apple juice is great, but I prefer orange. Sheng Erica. I 14 00:00:51.280 --> 00:00:56.240 realize that you have intentionally left six months in between this and our Italy trip 15 00:00:56.240 --> 00:01:02.640 to try to disguise who you're talking about. It is. It is so 16 00:01:02.799 --> 00:01:06.159 entertaining. You have no idea how funny. It's awkward, for sure, 17 00:01:06.239 --> 00:01:10.239 but it's so entertaining. I also, I was recently traveling with another couple 18 00:01:10.280 --> 00:01:14.319 friends and they were delightful the entire time there was but every once in a 19 00:01:14.359 --> 00:01:17.400 while I could see the two of them being like, we will fight about 20 00:01:17.400 --> 00:01:22.200 this the minute she leaves, the minute we will have this out as soon 21 00:01:22.239 --> 00:01:25.760 as this one is out of the way. I'm speaking as someone from within 22 00:01:25.840 --> 00:01:29.640 a couple. I can tell you that, yes, that is exactly what 23 00:01:29.719 --> 00:01:33.680 happened. I was with the group once and my husband and I had had 24 00:01:33.719 --> 00:01:36.959 one of those moments and I called it off and then I said, I 25 00:01:37.439 --> 00:01:38.959 refuse to be out loud to everybody. I was like, I refuse to 26 00:01:38.959 --> 00:01:44.200 be one of those couples that starts fighting in front of everybody. And one 27 00:01:44.239 --> 00:01:46.519 of our friends was like, Oh, don't worry. If you became that 28 00:01:46.560 --> 00:02:00.239 couple, no one would blame you. We all know it's his fault. 29 00:02:05.719 --> 00:02:10.560 Hey, I'm Paul in America, and this is that aged well yesterday's pop 30 00:02:10.599 --> 00:02:16.360 culture. Today, Paul is just grinning at me like like a game show 31 00:02:16.400 --> 00:02:23.280 host on crank. I can't I think we would be good game show hosts. 32 00:02:23.719 --> 00:02:27.639 Oh, we're good at everything. Soviously we would be a good game 33 00:02:27.680 --> 00:02:32.520 show except running. We're not good at running. Either one of us is 34 00:02:32.560 --> 00:02:37.520 a runner. Believe me when I tell you, audience, no bigger truth 35 00:02:37.560 --> 00:02:42.560 has ever been spoken on this podcast. We have missed trains and been like, 36 00:02:42.639 --> 00:02:45.280 we'll run for the next We're not running. We're not running. Yeah, 37 00:02:45.280 --> 00:02:47.000 we'll sit. We are five feet away from this thing that is moving 38 00:02:47.879 --> 00:02:52.800 that. The thing about trains is there's another one in an hour. I'll 39 00:02:52.840 --> 00:02:57.719 go get it. I'll go go to croissant. I'll be fine, Erica. 40 00:02:57.800 --> 00:03:00.199 We have a five star Apple podcast review. Shall I read this one? 41 00:03:00.639 --> 00:03:07.520 Absolutely? Okay? This is from film Lover Lover l OvR lover right 42 00:03:07.560 --> 00:03:15.360 lover lover like Laverne and Shirley. They write canonically great, my new favorite 43 00:03:15.520 --> 00:03:20.759 movie podcast. I found Paul through the Devilwars product episode of Movies That Made 44 00:03:20.840 --> 00:03:23.439 Us Gay. Oh that's very nice. You know, Movies that made us 45 00:03:23.479 --> 00:03:27.879 gay in Us? We both just appeared in the January February issue of The 46 00:03:27.919 --> 00:03:31.840 Advocate. That's right. High five to Scott and Pete as quintessential queer podcasts. 47 00:03:31.919 --> 00:03:36.479 That's right. Okay, So film Lover wrote, I found Paul through 48 00:03:36.520 --> 00:03:38.120 The Devilwars, proud episode of movies that made us gay, and I knew 49 00:03:38.199 --> 00:03:42.639 I had to hear more. Now I'm listening to the back catalog and just 50 00:03:42.639 --> 00:03:46.080 subscribe to the Patreon. Oh fantastic, because I can't get enough of Paul 51 00:03:46.080 --> 00:03:50.719 and Erica. Very few movies have aged well, but it is so wonderful 52 00:03:50.719 --> 00:03:54.680 to hear their funny and insightful takes on. Why may I suggest The Rock 53 00:03:54.840 --> 00:03:59.120 for a future episode? It would be a good opportunity to break out the 54 00:03:59.240 --> 00:04:02.719 Sean Connrie voice. Am I mistaken in saying that mister Nicholas Cage is also 55 00:04:02.759 --> 00:04:06.599 in The Rock? Mister Nicholas Cage. Oh, it's such a good movie, 56 00:04:06.599 --> 00:04:10.400 Paul. Here's how good that movie is. I saw it in the 57 00:04:10.400 --> 00:04:12.360 theater. I was like, I don't know, I don't know when it 58 00:04:12.360 --> 00:04:15.240 came out. I was like a teenager, Yeah, teenager remember go who 59 00:04:15.519 --> 00:04:19.399 like loved a rock concert every once in a while, who listened to music 60 00:04:19.480 --> 00:04:24.040 loudly on her earphones. Okay, sixteen year old me was sitting in that 61 00:04:24.120 --> 00:04:27.600 movie going, can you turn the volume down? This is this is a 62 00:04:27.720 --> 00:04:31.000 lot, this is very shrill. Riot girl Erica was like, wow, 63 00:04:31.199 --> 00:04:35.279 Wow, this movie is like fucking Courtney Love could have been in that theater. 64 00:04:35.360 --> 00:04:39.519 I'd been like shrill. This is shrill, right, don't. I 65 00:04:39.519 --> 00:04:42.240 don't care for it. I don't care for any of this. We should 66 00:04:42.279 --> 00:04:45.959 do the Rock. Okay, okay, fair enough, fair enough. I'm 67 00:04:46.000 --> 00:04:47.759 also so thrilled to hear that film Lover is a member of the Patreon. 68 00:04:47.800 --> 00:04:51.000 Do you everyone reminding everyone right now? You can join the Patreon. You 69 00:04:51.000 --> 00:04:56.079 can become a free member, which means you would be able to comment on 70 00:04:56.120 --> 00:04:59.600 the on the post about this year episode from the main feed episodes, or 71 00:04:59.639 --> 00:05:02.199 you can be become There's multiple tiers. You get different different benefits due to 72 00:05:02.199 --> 00:05:06.160 them, but all paid tiers get ad free episodes. Film Lover. This 73 00:05:06.399 --> 00:05:10.519 review is canonically great and we so appreciate it. If you would like a 74 00:05:10.519 --> 00:05:13.759 tote bag, go ahead, shoot us an email, let us know this 75 00:05:13.839 --> 00:05:17.279 is you, and I will send the tote bag off for you. Erica, 76 00:05:17.560 --> 00:05:20.800 what is the movie? This is the first Monday in March and we 77 00:05:20.839 --> 00:05:29.800 are doing Murder Mystery March. Shoot do Today's Murder Mystery is the nineteen ninety 78 00:05:29.800 --> 00:05:35.360 three dark comedy So I married an ax murderer, so so so don't judge, 79 00:05:35.800 --> 00:05:40.720 So I married an AX murderer. Judge, not lest ye be judge. 80 00:05:40.720 --> 00:05:45.000 That's what I say. Okay, so I married an AX murderer was 81 00:05:45.040 --> 00:05:47.759 requested by Jenny, by Lana, by Carrie Ann, by Marie Allen, 82 00:05:48.240 --> 00:05:53.480 by Kelly, and by Erin. It was written by Robbie Fox and directed 83 00:05:53.480 --> 00:05:57.480 by Thomas Schlami. You know we've done other Tomas Shlami on this podcast before. 84 00:05:57.560 --> 00:05:59.439 Is it not true? Because we did the West Wing, The West 85 00:05:59.480 --> 00:06:03.199 Wing. This is Tommy s This is the famous TV director, Thomas Slammy, 86 00:06:03.319 --> 00:06:09.120 Tommy Slammy, Tommy Slammy. The movie stars Mike Myers, Nancy Travis, 87 00:06:09.120 --> 00:06:14.360 Anthony LaPaglia, Amanda Plumber, and Brenda Fricker. I mean this fucking 88 00:06:14.439 --> 00:06:20.319 cast. Four fifths of this cast is fucking perfect word word. Actually, 89 00:06:20.360 --> 00:06:24.079 I'm would keep all of them. We'll talk about it. We'll talk about 90 00:06:24.120 --> 00:06:27.920 it. Sharon Stone was initially approached to play Harriet, the female lead, 91 00:06:28.040 --> 00:06:31.839 but insisted on playing both Harriet and Rose, her sister. Uh huh, 92 00:06:32.040 --> 00:06:35.240 go big or go home, Sharon Stone, I fucking love you. Sharon 93 00:06:35.319 --> 00:06:39.800 Stone is not afraid to ask the question. She's not afraid to have an 94 00:06:39.839 --> 00:06:45.720 opinion, do not change Sharon Stone. The studio refused because that is a 95 00:06:45.800 --> 00:06:48.519 stupid idea. Sharon Stone. We love that you had it there. There 96 00:06:48.519 --> 00:06:50.639 are no bad ideas, but there are stupid ideas, you know what I 97 00:06:50.680 --> 00:06:54.600 mean. There are no bad ideas, there are no We are gonna listen 98 00:06:54.639 --> 00:06:57.519 to everything you have to say, and then we're going to reject it for 99 00:06:57.600 --> 00:07:01.759 being so dumb. So they cast Nancy Travis and Amanda Plummer. Here's the 100 00:07:01.800 --> 00:07:05.560 thing. I love Amanda Plumber. Yeah, but the minute she shows up 101 00:07:05.560 --> 00:07:09.920 in your movie that is a murder mystery, you're like, well, Amanda 102 00:07:09.920 --> 00:07:15.000 Plummer did it? Well a Manda Plummer is the killer. But you know 103 00:07:15.040 --> 00:07:17.480 what, it was so much Amanda Plummer is a killer that I was like, 104 00:07:17.480 --> 00:07:19.920 well, maybe she's not. Like I circled all the way back around. 105 00:07:20.439 --> 00:07:24.959 It's good. I was like, nay, But I mean it's Amanda 106 00:07:25.000 --> 00:07:28.920 Plummer. Has she ever not been a murderer in a movie? Can we 107 00:07:28.959 --> 00:07:33.199 can we find any movie where Amanda Plumber didn't brutally murder somebody? I know 108 00:07:33.399 --> 00:07:38.560 you'd be hard pressed, my friend, she knows her pocket. Mike Myers 109 00:07:38.600 --> 00:07:42.600 insisted unchanges to the original script that would allow him to do serious acting but 110 00:07:42.720 --> 00:07:48.240 also us NL style sketch performance. Okay, so here's here's what it is. 111 00:07:48.439 --> 00:07:53.439 I don't think the father was a character. And then he was like, 112 00:07:53.720 --> 00:07:56.199 I have a Scottish thing that I do, and this is remember this 113 00:07:56.240 --> 00:08:01.040 is before Shrek, before his whole thing was being sco Scotsman. And he's 114 00:08:01.079 --> 00:08:05.439 like, I do a funny Scottish God's ogre Erica. Please don't erase his 115 00:08:05.519 --> 00:08:11.199 identity if you will. And so he was like, I do a funny 116 00:08:11.199 --> 00:08:13.279 Scotsman? Can I do one in this movie? Please? And they were 117 00:08:13.279 --> 00:08:20.439 like, wow, yeah, because we need you this whole We're building this 118 00:08:20.439 --> 00:08:24.199 whole goddamn thing around you, so sure yeah. And he's like, yeah, 119 00:08:24.199 --> 00:08:26.040 but how about if I cast Brenda Fricker as my mom? And they're 120 00:08:26.040 --> 00:08:31.000 like, okay, okay, I put this in here because there are two 121 00:08:31.040 --> 00:08:35.399 movies in this movie, and one of them I really really liked, and 122 00:08:35.440 --> 00:08:37.120 the other one made me want to shave my head and run into the subway 123 00:08:37.120 --> 00:08:41.480 tunnels. Delivered them old people. I the SNL style sketch. I hate 124 00:08:41.519 --> 00:08:43.679 it. I hate it every time it comes up. I hate it. 125 00:08:43.720 --> 00:08:48.000 No matter who was doing it, it's always Mike Myers because I see a 126 00:08:48.039 --> 00:08:52.519 movie that I actually really like and is really funny and smart, funny, 127 00:08:52.559 --> 00:08:54.600 and and I look, I don't. I looked up Robbie Fox, the 128 00:08:54.600 --> 00:08:58.120 writer, because this was apparently done like to his script. I'm like, 129 00:08:58.159 --> 00:09:01.080 I wonder if this guy is written more movies that maybe I like or I 130 00:09:01.159 --> 00:09:03.879 know he's done a couple other ones, but I don't know any of them, 131 00:09:05.320 --> 00:09:07.440 so I can't say for whether or not I actually like like his sense 132 00:09:07.480 --> 00:09:11.159 of humor. He did one called Shooting Elizabeth with Mimi Rodgers, and I 133 00:09:11.200 --> 00:09:13.879 think Jeff Goldbloom about a guy that plots to kill his wife. But it's 134 00:09:13.879 --> 00:09:18.639 a comedy. So anyway, the SNL sketch stuff that got jammed into this 135 00:09:18.759 --> 00:09:24.080 movie is really really rough for me. I do not care for it. 136 00:09:24.200 --> 00:09:28.399 I don't mind it. Some of it so so okay. So Mike Myers 137 00:09:28.519 --> 00:09:31.600 is the lead. I'm guessing I don't really know this, but I'm guessing 138 00:09:31.639 --> 00:09:37.240 this came right after Wayne's World. He was a big star, yeah there, 139 00:09:37.399 --> 00:09:41.240 comedic star in this film. He's okay. He's not a good actor, 140 00:09:41.399 --> 00:09:43.679 he's an okay actor. He can do a big swing for five minutes, 141 00:09:45.320 --> 00:09:48.879 really well, but in my opinion, he can't like sustain just a 142 00:09:48.960 --> 00:09:52.639 guy, yeah, being a guy, and so like this. To me, 143 00:09:52.759 --> 00:09:56.600 I have the opposite reaction to him. The scenes where he's the father, 144 00:09:56.039 --> 00:10:01.159 he's doing that silly, over the top sketch character. Because it's only 145 00:10:01.200 --> 00:10:03.879 two short scenes, I'm into it. I think it's funny when he is 146 00:10:03.960 --> 00:10:09.519 playing the main character of the film and he is like a romantic lead, 147 00:10:09.399 --> 00:10:11.879 and I don't buy it for a minute. I just also, Nancy Travis 148 00:10:11.919 --> 00:10:16.559 is so out of his league that I'm like that guy why. I didn't 149 00:10:16.559 --> 00:10:20.120 find the Father stuff funny, But it didn't irritate me to the level where 150 00:10:20.120 --> 00:10:24.919 I could see Mike Myers as the lead in the movie being a perfectly kind 151 00:10:24.960 --> 00:10:28.679 of fine, normal person and then to me seeming like an insecure actor who's 152 00:10:28.720 --> 00:10:33.000 not sure of that part, that muscle, and so he does an essenali 153 00:10:33.120 --> 00:10:35.919 thing because he's like, I have to make people laugh. I have to 154 00:10:35.960 --> 00:10:39.240 do this is what I know how to do. And look, he's very 155 00:10:39.240 --> 00:10:41.360 good on it. So wait, I'm so sorry. So the Father stuff 156 00:10:41.399 --> 00:10:45.480 doesn't bother you, that's what I thought you were talking about. I don't 157 00:10:45.720 --> 00:10:48.960 like it. It didn't make me laugh, and I wish it wasn't there. 158 00:10:48.279 --> 00:10:50.919 It still makes me laugh. And I've seen this movie so much, 159 00:10:50.960 --> 00:10:54.759 but it it like you said, it's two scenes and that's what that character 160 00:10:54.960 --> 00:10:58.960 is. The stuff that really made my skin crawl was like literally the first 161 00:11:00.080 --> 00:11:03.279 lines that Mike Meyer says in this movie. I was like, if this 162 00:11:03.360 --> 00:11:05.360 is, if it is ninety minutes of this, I will not make it. 163 00:11:07.120 --> 00:11:09.639 I will lose my mind. I see what you mean. Yeah, 164 00:11:09.639 --> 00:11:13.480 the perform I mean, but to me, that's just the performance. It's 165 00:11:13.559 --> 00:11:18.440 just he's supposed to play a guy who's so charming that he uses is he 166 00:11:18.519 --> 00:11:22.759 uses yeah, I know, I know. And he uses humor to win 167 00:11:22.799 --> 00:11:28.519 over this like woman who's like who's who's had this incredible past and is obviously 168 00:11:28.600 --> 00:11:31.759 incredibly like about out of his league? Right, Yeah? I feel bad 169 00:11:31.759 --> 00:11:35.559 saying I like Mike Myers. There's nothing against him. But I'm not anything 170 00:11:35.559 --> 00:11:37.559 against him. But he's a bad actor. He's not good enough to play 171 00:11:37.639 --> 00:11:41.799 like a guy that I believe. Whatever he has, he has millions and 172 00:11:41.840 --> 00:11:45.240 millions of dollars for his acting. I don't think he cares that the two 173 00:11:45.279 --> 00:11:46.720 of us think he sucks, but we're right. He sucks. He's not 174 00:11:46.799 --> 00:11:50.799 good. He doesn't suck at like Austin Powers. No, right, exactly. 175 00:11:50.879 --> 00:11:56.120 He doesn't suck as Wayne. But to me, somebody's just trying to 176 00:11:56.159 --> 00:11:58.240 be a guy, and I'm like, I don't. Why don't I believe 177 00:11:58.279 --> 00:12:01.159 you? You are You're really a guy. But I don't believe that you're 178 00:12:01.159 --> 00:12:05.519 a guy because he doesn't let you because there are moments where he like drops 179 00:12:05.559 --> 00:12:07.440 in and is normal, and then he has to do he has to make 180 00:12:07.440 --> 00:12:11.919 a face, he has to do something weird, he has to comment on 181 00:12:11.039 --> 00:12:16.639 the action. So you know that Mike Myers knows that that was a joke 182 00:12:16.960 --> 00:12:22.279 and it's not what normal humans do. It's annoying. Although I think I 183 00:12:22.320 --> 00:12:26.440 would, I would stupidly say, excuse me, I believe I ordered the 184 00:12:26.480 --> 00:12:30.480 small, the large cappuccino. Hello. I actually think I said that. 185 00:12:30.559 --> 00:12:35.840 In life, I might be Mike Myers. It's not even the joke, 186 00:12:35.000 --> 00:12:39.159 it's the delivery of the joke. Everything about it irritates me. I don't 187 00:12:39.240 --> 00:12:41.039 like the joke. I think the joke is bad. And I will say, 188 00:12:41.080 --> 00:12:43.799 I've never said that, so you never you've never been like, I'm 189 00:12:43.799 --> 00:12:50.120 sorry, I or did this large steak when served a pound stake. Yeah, 190 00:12:50.159 --> 00:12:52.679 I know, I know. There's The character is interesting too. A 191 00:12:52.679 --> 00:12:58.639 better actor could have explained away some of the quirks of this character that I'm 192 00:12:58.720 --> 00:13:01.679 like, sure, is he actually a beat poet? Is this something he 193 00:13:01.759 --> 00:13:05.600 does for fun a living? They don't say what he does for a living. 194 00:13:05.639 --> 00:13:09.480 He's the only character in the movie except for I guess Rose who they 195 00:13:09.559 --> 00:13:11.960 don't tell you what they do for a living or where he lives, except 196 00:13:11.960 --> 00:13:16.080 there's a beautiful shot of his apartment, Like, there is a shot of 197 00:13:16.080 --> 00:13:18.200 his yeah, later in the movie. Yeah, he's sitting on his roof. 198 00:13:18.320 --> 00:13:22.039 I just presumed he was a vagrant who climbed up the fire escape of 199 00:13:22.039 --> 00:13:24.240 some I don't know that's his apartment. Well, because the next shot is 200 00:13:24.320 --> 00:13:28.879 him in his apartment on the phone with Anthony Apoulia. Okay, it's a 201 00:13:28.879 --> 00:13:31.679 gorgeous apartment too. So he whatever he does, he does very well. 202 00:13:33.279 --> 00:13:37.399 But I'm like, what, I don't know anything about this guy. All 203 00:13:37.440 --> 00:13:41.639 he knows he's insecure with women, and then he has all these quirks, 204 00:13:41.679 --> 00:13:45.240 and I'm like, but who are you You want me to think she's a 205 00:13:45.279 --> 00:13:50.919 serial killer, where I actually think you're a serial killer, because you've overquirked 206 00:13:50.960 --> 00:13:54.360 this guy to the point where I'm like, something's off, something is off 207 00:13:54.399 --> 00:13:56.799 here. He could never be a serial killer with those parents, they'd give 208 00:13:56.840 --> 00:14:01.279 him up in a minute. That's true. Yeah, it overquirked him, 209 00:14:01.279 --> 00:14:03.879 like they overduced Tom Cruise in Top Gun. You know Top Gun. They've 210 00:14:03.919 --> 00:14:09.639 overworked, they've overquirked Mike Myers. Yeah, Paul wol a shock you to 211 00:14:09.679 --> 00:14:13.639 find out that's so. I married an ex murderer. Has a fifty three 212 00:14:13.720 --> 00:14:18.000 percent critical rating on Rotten Tomatoes and a sixty eight percent audience score. It 213 00:14:18.000 --> 00:14:22.000 would not that would actually track perfectly for me. I'm a little surprised the 214 00:14:22.039 --> 00:14:24.120 audience score isn't higher because I know people love this movie, but I think 215 00:14:24.120 --> 00:14:26.840 it's a little bit of a cult classic, so maybe that explains it. 216 00:14:28.320 --> 00:14:31.240 I think fifty three is too low. Look, I get it, the 217 00:14:31.279 --> 00:14:35.039 central performance is lacking. He's fine, But to me, he does not 218 00:14:35.159 --> 00:14:39.960 tank the movie at all, and the movie around him is really fucking good 219 00:14:41.120 --> 00:14:45.759 and really well written and really funny. I find fifty three percent to be 220 00:14:46.159 --> 00:14:50.480 people going oh Mike Myers and writing the whole thing off. Well, if 221 00:14:50.480 --> 00:14:52.879 he was a supporting character. Like if he was on screen as much as 222 00:14:52.919 --> 00:14:56.360 say like Anthony LaPaglia doing this, I'd be like, this should be higher. 223 00:14:56.399 --> 00:15:01.440 But he's in essentially every frame of this movie. Yeah, dragging it 224 00:15:01.519 --> 00:15:05.200 down like an anchor the whole time. For me, would I would actually 225 00:15:05.200 --> 00:15:07.639 give this movie a much higher rating. I would give it like a seventy 226 00:15:07.840 --> 00:15:11.960 seventy five percent. It's good as a movie. It is very good. 227 00:15:11.200 --> 00:15:13.919 Yeah, Yeah, I agree. It's funny because some of the SNL people 228 00:15:13.919 --> 00:15:16.360 you don't think are going to be good are actually like, holy shit, 229 00:15:16.960 --> 00:15:20.960 you can act, right, I mean, it's not as fall my Myers 230 00:15:20.960 --> 00:15:26.039 can't act, and like, like what a way to find out? What 231 00:15:26.480 --> 00:15:31.000 a twenty million dollar way to find out that you can't act? H Erica, 232 00:15:31.039 --> 00:15:35.559 when did you first see so I married an axe murderer again, You're 233 00:15:35.559 --> 00:15:39.879 gonna be so surprised when I tell you this in the theater, all right. 234 00:15:39.120 --> 00:15:41.159 I would go so far to say I love this movie. I think 235 00:15:41.159 --> 00:15:46.440 it's so funny and adorable. And it does for San Francisco. When Harry 236 00:15:46.480 --> 00:15:48.759 met Sally does for New York, it makes San Francisco look gorgeous. It 237 00:15:48.799 --> 00:15:52.480 does. Agree, it wasn't really until this week watching it for the I'm 238 00:15:52.559 --> 00:15:56.600 not exaggerating twelve thirteenth, fourteenth time that I was like, Mike Myers is 239 00:15:56.679 --> 00:16:00.399 terrible because I think the writing wins over every time, so I don't, 240 00:16:00.480 --> 00:16:06.360 yeah, necessarily pay attention to everyone else in the movie. How about you, 241 00:16:06.360 --> 00:16:07.919 Paul, When did you first see So I Married an Ex? I 242 00:16:07.960 --> 00:16:11.639 saw it two days ago for the first time. I remember this one in 243 00:16:11.639 --> 00:16:15.279 the video store. I remember seeing it because I would always go to the 244 00:16:15.279 --> 00:16:18.440 comedy. I wouldn't go to horror or anything like that, and it was 245 00:16:18.600 --> 00:16:22.399 and it was always one that like I remember the cover because it's the cover 246 00:16:22.480 --> 00:16:26.600 with Mike Myers and Nancy Travison leaning towards each other and they're kind of smiling 247 00:16:26.639 --> 00:16:29.240 at the camera and he's holding a bouquet of flowers and she's holding an axe. 248 00:16:29.360 --> 00:16:32.799 Yeah. I was always like curious about it, like, well, 249 00:16:32.799 --> 00:16:36.679 it's a comedy, but that looks like something a little different. And then 250 00:16:36.679 --> 00:16:38.679 I just never got it, never got around to it, basically, So 251 00:16:38.720 --> 00:16:45.360 I saw it a couple days ago. I really loved the parts I loved, 252 00:16:45.759 --> 00:16:48.600 and I really hated the parts I hated. I like there was no 253 00:16:48.720 --> 00:16:52.320 gray area in this. For me, I was either in on the scene 254 00:16:52.399 --> 00:16:56.159 or I was out on the scene. Perhaps the most whiplashity movie experience that 255 00:16:56.200 --> 00:16:59.240 I've ever had. Wow, Like, I hate this, I hate this, 256 00:16:59.320 --> 00:17:02.320 I love this, I hate this. I hate this. Ha ha 257 00:17:00.919 --> 00:17:03.480 ha. And I also think it's It's one of those things where if you 258 00:17:03.480 --> 00:17:07.279 see it when you're young, a lot of the broader stuff works better on 259 00:17:07.319 --> 00:17:11.480 a younger audience, and then it becomes ingrained in your head is funny, 260 00:17:11.480 --> 00:17:15.000 and then you it's like me with Iago, where like, is the Iago 261 00:17:15.039 --> 00:17:18.000 stuff really as funny as it is to me? No, it isn't. 262 00:17:18.039 --> 00:17:21.759 But like you put that fucking parrot on screen, and I am one hundred 263 00:17:21.799 --> 00:17:25.440 and ten percent in you know, like and I and I really do get 264 00:17:25.519 --> 00:17:27.119 that, Like if you saw this as a kid, and like the Father 265 00:17:27.240 --> 00:17:30.640 hit for you, and like the joky stuff that Mike Myers has hit for 266 00:17:30.680 --> 00:17:33.839 you, it it's still gonna be funny to you today. And there's nothing 267 00:17:33.839 --> 00:17:36.440 wrong with that. It's just yeah, I saw it as a forty something 268 00:17:36.519 --> 00:17:44.079 year old man, and I was like, no, absolutely not. What 269 00:17:44.160 --> 00:17:47.519 if Meadows had played this, Ah, what a dream? He would have 270 00:17:47.559 --> 00:17:48.759 been too young in ninety three. But I'm trying to think of like other 271 00:17:48.920 --> 00:17:53.440 SNL actors who maybe don't get there, like who didn't get a chance to 272 00:17:53.480 --> 00:17:56.880 be a living man and would have been a lot better at it. And 273 00:17:56.960 --> 00:18:00.160 so I'm like Tim Meadows would have been amazing in this. And then we've 274 00:18:00.519 --> 00:18:06.480 have gotten a ladies man for his father, right, the ladies man sketch 275 00:18:06.559 --> 00:18:08.680 in the movie, or one of the kids in the hall doing it like 276 00:18:08.799 --> 00:18:12.680 Dave Foley doing it. Oh, Mark McKinney would have fucking nailed this. 277 00:18:14.000 --> 00:18:17.680 Yeah, I oh, now I want Mark McKinney to play this part because 278 00:18:17.720 --> 00:18:21.920 all of them can act to a man. So yeah, all right, 279 00:18:22.039 --> 00:18:26.319 Erica. The tagline for so I married an axe murderer is the honeymoon was 280 00:18:26.480 --> 00:18:29.720 killer. I kind of like that one. I kind of like it. 281 00:18:29.720 --> 00:18:33.279 It's cute if it's a movie. Yeah, Shall I read the iTunes synopsis? 282 00:18:33.359 --> 00:18:38.720 Please do an earnest but goofy San Francisco beat poet. Everything about that 283 00:18:38.759 --> 00:18:44.000 line, Everything about that line, because you know what, I see no 284 00:18:44.039 --> 00:18:48.559 inaccuracies here. That's that's correct, that is correct. But also what a 285 00:18:48.640 --> 00:18:53.960 hill to climb to? What a hill to climb? I'm gonna read that 286 00:18:55.039 --> 00:19:00.880 again. An earnest but goofy San Francisco beat poet with a knack for hooking 287 00:19:00.960 --> 00:19:07.920 up with crazy women. Mary's a sweet natured butcher who keeps giving signals that 288 00:19:07.960 --> 00:19:12.039 she may be a husband killer. The fucking mountain this movie has to climb 289 00:19:12.039 --> 00:19:18.519 to make her. It really does this task go bost and the fact that 290 00:19:18.559 --> 00:19:22.400 it gets as far as it does is really a tribute to Anthony LaPaglia and 291 00:19:22.480 --> 00:19:27.799 Nancy Travis and Amanda Plumber and Brenda Fricker. We'll get into every scene with 292 00:19:27.839 --> 00:19:32.759 Brenda Frickers and is a comic moment. All right, Erica, do you 293 00:19:32.839 --> 00:19:38.880 have an actual synopsis for So I Married an axe murderer movie? Oh? 294 00:19:38.920 --> 00:19:48.240 God, movev move. You know what should have factored? He is not 295 00:19:48.400 --> 00:19:57.119 an actor? Someone please call Billy Chris Tall, Hey, Paul, take 296 00:19:57.160 --> 00:20:03.119 me off this crazy thing called rom com. I feel like calling has been 297 00:20:03.160 --> 00:20:07.359 ignored here. I yeah, it's true. I am one of the great 298 00:20:07.359 --> 00:20:11.880 beats. No one knew about you, Allen Ginsburg. We got the real 299 00:20:11.920 --> 00:20:17.519 stuff here. You know what people don't say, fuck you Allen Ginsburg. 300 00:20:17.640 --> 00:20:19.519 Enough frankly true? Yeah, he needs to be told the funk off at 301 00:20:19.599 --> 00:20:25.200 least at least twice as much as he is. All right, stick around, 302 00:20:25.200 --> 00:20:29.079 we'll be right back. We will take you through. So I married 303 00:20:29.079 --> 00:20:47.440 an axe murderer again, and we're back there. She goes by the laws 304 00:20:47.480 --> 00:20:52.680 plays as we open in San Francisco. The soundtrack is so nineties, like 305 00:20:52.799 --> 00:20:55.880 at one point in the movie they played two princes they sure do for no 306 00:20:55.960 --> 00:21:00.000 real reason, for no reason except they wanted it. They wanted it, 307 00:21:00.000 --> 00:21:03.480 and they gave it to us, and I, like my soul just jumped 308 00:21:03.480 --> 00:21:08.559 with fucking joy. Yeah at the soundtrack at the nineties, weird needle drops 309 00:21:08.559 --> 00:21:15.240 that this movie has. We open at Rhodes, which is a coffee house, 310 00:21:15.799 --> 00:21:21.119 a performance space. The space is so aggressively nineties that there is a 311 00:21:21.160 --> 00:21:26.559 man dressed in Linda Perry cosplay in the middle of the and it's not even 312 00:21:26.640 --> 00:21:29.680 remarked upon. No, it's just he's an extra. It is. It 313 00:21:29.759 --> 00:21:33.960 is as if he's about to break into what's going on. Yeah, at 314 00:21:33.000 --> 00:21:37.480 any moment, like the other non blondes are nowhere to be seen. It's 315 00:21:37.559 --> 00:21:41.240 just like the hair this it's it's so nineties. I loved every minute of 316 00:21:41.279 --> 00:21:45.359 it. I really loved this opening before people started talking. I was so 317 00:21:45.440 --> 00:21:52.079 in yeah, because it's also very like it's it's lampooning something lovingly, right. 318 00:21:52.160 --> 00:21:55.359 It's just look, friends, friends didn't come out of nowhere. Coffee 319 00:21:55.359 --> 00:21:59.559 houses were a fucking thing in the next So it's we're following this like large 320 00:21:59.599 --> 00:22:03.039 cappucho mug as. It's like going through the restaurant and we're seeing the patrons. 321 00:22:03.400 --> 00:22:08.319 We're seeing the very cavalier way in which the people this at this establishment 322 00:22:08.480 --> 00:22:15.000 wash their dishes before reserving a cappuccino in that same cup. May I tell 323 00:22:15.000 --> 00:22:18.839 you, as someone who bartended a lot in his early twenties, that's accurate. 324 00:22:18.160 --> 00:22:22.599 Oh god, the fact that there wasn't a pandemic earlier is frankly shocking 325 00:22:22.680 --> 00:22:26.680 when you think about the general health code level that we're dealing with in the 326 00:22:26.759 --> 00:22:30.960 nineties and bars. Oh my god. When I was bartending, you would 327 00:22:32.039 --> 00:22:33.799 you would take the glass and there'd be a sink just like they had it 328 00:22:33.839 --> 00:22:37.279 set up. You would just dip the glass in like the dirty soapy water. 329 00:22:37.400 --> 00:22:41.160 Yeah, that did the clean water. He put that in clothes, 330 00:22:41.200 --> 00:22:44.960 by the way, and then here's a dirty martini. It's literally dirty. 331 00:22:45.119 --> 00:22:48.240 Enjoy let's stick on the rim. Well, let's stick you would take off. 332 00:22:48.400 --> 00:22:52.680 I at least would look at the glass like could it pass a cursory 333 00:22:52.720 --> 00:22:56.480 inspection? Some people would not. I mean I bartended in restaurants, not 334 00:22:56.559 --> 00:22:57.839 bars, though, so I feel like it a dim bar. I don't 335 00:22:57.839 --> 00:23:02.440 think that they're not doing it cursory lipstick wipes. You should just ask for 336 00:23:02.519 --> 00:23:06.839 your glass back. Can you please have him make the martini in this class 337 00:23:07.359 --> 00:23:10.440 PSA for this episode. I don't care if it looks dumb. Drink through 338 00:23:10.480 --> 00:23:14.920 a straw for a straw. And also, by the way, this will 339 00:23:14.960 --> 00:23:18.359 not be the end of the health colde violations in this movie, and it 340 00:23:18.440 --> 00:23:22.119 is the by far the least upsetting one to me. Oh yeah, there 341 00:23:22.200 --> 00:23:26.240 is a full health code crisis happening later in the There is a health code 342 00:23:26.279 --> 00:23:30.240 disaster. Let me put it this way. Harriet is absolutely a mass murderer, 343 00:23:30.720 --> 00:23:33.400 just not in the way you think she is. Yeah, okay, 344 00:23:33.440 --> 00:23:38.359 So we follow the mug as it's brought to Charlie Mackenzie, played by the 345 00:23:38.400 --> 00:23:44.720 actor of a Generation Michael Myers. He immediately, oh, Paul writes here, 346 00:23:44.759 --> 00:23:47.519 he immediately makes the most self conscious joke about the size of the mug 347 00:23:47.519 --> 00:23:51.400 that I've ever seen outside of SNL. I think I've made this joke. 348 00:23:51.559 --> 00:23:55.400 I think I'm so embarrassed. He says, there seems to be a mistake. 349 00:23:55.440 --> 00:23:57.279 I ordered the large cappuccino and then he goes. Then he turns to 350 00:23:57.279 --> 00:24:00.839 his friend and he calls it a Campbell's cup Chino. Look, Paul, 351 00:24:02.599 --> 00:24:06.680 the nineties were an innocent time. This past for humor. What can I 352 00:24:06.720 --> 00:24:11.720 say? But it's not just the line, it's the delivery. He's delivering 353 00:24:11.799 --> 00:24:15.880 it and laugh It's he's Jimmy falloning it at the state, like he's laughing 354 00:24:15.920 --> 00:24:18.920 at himself saying it while he says it. Because look, it's not a 355 00:24:18.960 --> 00:24:22.680 great joke. But you're right, I'm sure I have been. Like you 356 00:24:22.680 --> 00:24:25.359 know, when they come to take your plate and it's empty, like I 357 00:24:25.400 --> 00:24:27.400 hated it. You know, like people make these dumb jokes, but you 358 00:24:27.400 --> 00:24:33.079 can make them in a way that an empty plate and I'm like, I 359 00:24:33.160 --> 00:24:36.680 hated it. And the waiter pretends to lie, Oh my god, I'm 360 00:24:36.680 --> 00:24:41.119 so embarrassed. But like people can say them in a way that a human 361 00:24:41.200 --> 00:24:44.559 says them. That is not what he accomplishes. He actually goes, oh 362 00:24:44.599 --> 00:24:48.119 my side, afterwards. It's so funny that it starts this way. It 363 00:24:48.200 --> 00:24:52.960 starts so hot with this character because he doesn't calm down a lot. I 364 00:24:53.000 --> 00:24:56.279 don't know why they're starting here. If they had put flashes of this in 365 00:24:56.359 --> 00:25:02.839 the movie later, like certain minutes in, I would. If you're absolutely 366 00:25:02.920 --> 00:25:06.720 right, he is unbearable in this scene. I was fully owned that he 367 00:25:06.799 --> 00:25:08.279 is unbearable in the scene. It's way too big and you're like, what 368 00:25:08.359 --> 00:25:11.839 the fuck he's doing Jim Carrey. Yeah, he's not even really doing Mike 369 00:25:11.920 --> 00:25:15.359 Myers. He seems to be doing Jim Carrey because, like Jim, Harry 370 00:25:15.400 --> 00:25:18.759 is a big star and everyone loves him. Charlie is with his best friend 371 00:25:18.799 --> 00:25:26.480 Tony Giardino played by Being Great and Good and Australian Anthony Lapoulia, who is 372 00:25:26.559 --> 00:25:30.000 mushmouthing his way through an American accent. I love you, Anthony Paulia. 373 00:25:30.039 --> 00:25:33.599 I don't care. I don't care. Ye no notes uh. He goes 374 00:25:33.640 --> 00:25:34.759 to his friend. He's like, so, can I ask you a question? 375 00:25:34.839 --> 00:25:37.599 And he's like, yeah, anything, And he's like, why are 376 00:25:37.640 --> 00:25:45.119 you dressed like Huggy bearfo Tartski And even like this, he's like acting basically 377 00:25:45.160 --> 00:25:48.640 normal he's just being He's like, this is how a character talks to other 378 00:25:48.680 --> 00:25:53.240 people. Yeah, and also like he I think he recognizes the joke is 379 00:25:53.319 --> 00:25:59.039 not is now the yea visual because the visual is so stupid? Yes, 380 00:25:59.160 --> 00:26:02.559 so yeah, so his he goes you look like an undercover cop trying to 381 00:26:02.559 --> 00:26:04.240 look hip, and then Charlotte and then his friend leans in. Tony's like, 382 00:26:04.480 --> 00:26:07.319 I am an undercover cop trying to look hip, and at first you 383 00:26:07.359 --> 00:26:10.720 think he's joking, and then you realize later, no, he really is 384 00:26:10.759 --> 00:26:15.839 an undercover cop. And he's dressing full head to toe pimp from like a 385 00:26:15.960 --> 00:26:21.279 nineteen seventies film. And it's so dumb. It's such a dumb joke because 386 00:26:21.279 --> 00:26:22.960 also I don't believe it for a second that this guy would think that this 387 00:26:23.039 --> 00:26:26.519 looks hip. But also if you look around him at some of the things 388 00:26:26.519 --> 00:26:30.279 that some of the people in that place are wearing, you're like maybe maybe. 389 00:26:30.519 --> 00:26:33.160 So. I think we mentioned before this is a performance space. There 390 00:26:33.200 --> 00:26:37.799 is a man on stage played by Patrick Bristow. You've seen him, I 391 00:26:37.839 --> 00:26:41.480 promise you you've seen him and stuff. He is a character actor. He 392 00:26:41.640 --> 00:26:45.240 was everywhere in the nineties. He has a bright red carrot top haircut in 393 00:26:45.279 --> 00:26:48.160 this film. That's got to be a he is only in this scene. 394 00:26:48.279 --> 00:26:52.720 Yeah, he introduces his next act. He goes, m My next poem 395 00:26:52.799 --> 00:26:56.240 is called an open Apology to the aliens who abducted me and whom I inflicted 396 00:26:56.359 --> 00:27:03.279 great destruction upon while having a panic attack aboard the mothership. Autobiographical. And 397 00:27:03.319 --> 00:27:07.119 he's saying it like so seriously, like this is a very serious poem. 398 00:27:07.160 --> 00:27:11.720 You see. He is an actor delivering a joke and allowing the audience to 399 00:27:11.799 --> 00:27:15.279 laugh. And it's so good, and the people in the coffee house are 400 00:27:15.359 --> 00:27:18.640 kind of laughing, like the movie is so good about going through that line 401 00:27:18.680 --> 00:27:21.920 with these scenes, with these coffeehouse scenes of like these people are there to 402 00:27:21.960 --> 00:27:26.000 have a good time, but also in an ironic kind of way, like 403 00:27:26.079 --> 00:27:30.640 we all get that this is kind of dumb delightful after the unfortunate poem that 404 00:27:30.680 --> 00:27:34.559 we do not get to hear. I'm upset. I am upset. I 405 00:27:34.960 --> 00:27:41.880 want reparations. I want an edited scene with Patrick Bristow giving me a fourteen 406 00:27:41.119 --> 00:27:48.759 minute poem about with the open apology letter to these aliens. They call Charlie 407 00:27:48.839 --> 00:27:52.240 up to the stage. I can't it is so weird. It's so weird, 408 00:27:52.440 --> 00:27:56.400 such an odd choice. Charlie then goes up to the stage. He 409 00:27:56.480 --> 00:28:00.559 is a poet. Before he does so, he tells Tony that he plans 410 00:28:00.599 --> 00:28:04.319 on doing a piece about Sherry, his ex, that he is convinced stole 411 00:28:04.359 --> 00:28:08.640 his cat. That's right. Tony knows a exactly what poem Charlie is about 412 00:28:08.640 --> 00:28:11.960 to do, because he does it all the time. He's like, listen, 413 00:28:11.960 --> 00:28:14.640 man, you're just breaking up with these women because you're scared of commitment. 414 00:28:14.720 --> 00:28:17.559 She was perfectly nice, and Charlie's like, no, no, she 415 00:28:17.680 --> 00:28:19.599 was a thief. I never saw my cat again. And then he's like, 416 00:28:19.599 --> 00:28:22.559 well, how about this woman she was in the mafia. What do 417 00:28:22.599 --> 00:28:25.799 you mean she was in the mafia. She never told me what she did 418 00:28:25.880 --> 00:28:29.640 for a living. Uh huh. He's like, she was unemployed, Charlie. 419 00:28:30.279 --> 00:28:33.519 And what about this other one? She smelled like soup, like beef 420 00:28:33.680 --> 00:28:37.640 vegetable soup, which, you know what, is an actually logical and perfectly 421 00:28:37.680 --> 00:28:40.559 valid reason to break up with someone. Fair Yeah, all right, So 422 00:28:40.640 --> 00:28:42.680 Charlie heads up to the stage. He's accompanied by the band. The band's 423 00:28:42.720 --> 00:28:48.480 doing like a behind him kind of thing, and he does he does the 424 00:28:48.519 --> 00:28:55.920 poem that Erica parodied for you in the actual synopsis woman whoa man? Whoa 425 00:28:56.000 --> 00:29:00.240 man? Etcetera, etcetera. I know it by heart. If you want 426 00:29:00.240 --> 00:29:03.240 me to recite the whole thing, I think everyone's good. But the actual 427 00:29:04.599 --> 00:29:11.400 you have to believe she saw my heart and my cat keep going, actual 428 00:29:11.559 --> 00:29:18.359 pictures of shit take me off this crazy thing, cold love. And then 429 00:29:18.359 --> 00:29:22.039 he blows out his votive candle. Sorry, I'm sorry, I had to 430 00:29:22.079 --> 00:29:27.039 do it, all right. So while he's doing this, actual pictures of 431 00:29:27.079 --> 00:29:32.880 Sherry pop up behind him, which is there's questions of consent happening here. 432 00:29:32.920 --> 00:29:37.079 I don't think this would fly today. But also the fact that Sherry is 433 00:29:37.119 --> 00:29:41.240 played by Sheila Kelly made me remember Debbie Country and it made me angry. 434 00:29:41.319 --> 00:29:44.440 I wasn't watching singles. You know what it is is they're making fun of 435 00:29:44.480 --> 00:29:48.000 the earnestness of the people in the movie singles. Yeah pretty much? Yeah, 436 00:29:48.079 --> 00:29:52.599 yeah, all right. So the poem devolves in him basically discussing how 437 00:29:52.599 --> 00:29:56.799 horny he is for the women of Saturday morning cartoons, and then it ends 438 00:29:56.960 --> 00:30:00.279 the vote of candle blowout that we were saying, what what's the sexiest Saturday 439 00:30:00.279 --> 00:30:06.799 Morning cartoon. Well, he's not wrong about Josie and the Pussycats. Frankly, 440 00:30:07.319 --> 00:30:11.160 you know is it is it disgusting if I say he man, because 441 00:30:11.160 --> 00:30:12.920 I do love a page boy. You want to know what I feel like? 442 00:30:12.960 --> 00:30:18.119 It might be one of the ThunderCats. Those were hot. ThunderCats were 443 00:30:18.119 --> 00:30:22.000 hot, really hot, and I can I would be honest here and say 444 00:30:22.079 --> 00:30:25.279 right now, I've literally never seen a single episode of the ThunderCats, but 445 00:30:25.359 --> 00:30:27.880 I do know what the lead one and the tiger one look like. I 446 00:30:27.880 --> 00:30:33.000 don't know their names, but I know what they look like, and would 447 00:30:33.079 --> 00:30:36.359 do would fuck the ThunderCats. You're one hundred percent right. It is the 448 00:30:36.400 --> 00:30:38.759 ThunderCats. The little furries keep your warm at night. They'll purr. Yeah, 449 00:30:38.799 --> 00:30:41.200 you know, you know there's they have body heat. You know that's 450 00:30:41.279 --> 00:30:45.279 right. Yeah. Okay, By the way, I have a question because 451 00:30:45.319 --> 00:30:48.559 this does relate back to the movie that it's not about sexy ThunderCats anymore. 452 00:30:48.319 --> 00:30:52.759 So Sam just go trolley like a street car comes across and it like cross 453 00:30:52.759 --> 00:30:56.839 feeds the scene. Right. So there's a lot of kind of interesting, 454 00:30:56.160 --> 00:31:00.880 uh scene cuts in this movie. Did you watch this on AMC plus? 455 00:31:02.039 --> 00:31:04.160 I did watch this on AMC Plus. That's the only place it was available 456 00:31:04.160 --> 00:31:08.400 this week. It is edited for commercials. It is edited for commercials because 457 00:31:08.400 --> 00:31:12.039 there are a couple times because I peak behind the curtain, I have an 458 00:31:12.039 --> 00:31:15.160 illegal copy of this movie, so I can pull pictures for the Instagram and 459 00:31:15.160 --> 00:31:19.359 stuff, and those fade outs that happened because the commercials don't happen. So 460 00:31:19.400 --> 00:31:23.400 it's so much less weird. Yeah, but on AMC Plus there's it's still 461 00:31:23.400 --> 00:31:27.720 optimized for commercials and there's a couple of seed changes where you're like, what, 462 00:31:29.400 --> 00:31:33.480 yeah, well you expect a commercial cut, Like, yeah, it's 463 00:31:33.519 --> 00:31:37.240 so weird. But because I've seen the movie fourteen fifteen sixteen times, I 464 00:31:37.279 --> 00:31:42.119 can tell you nothing got cut, Like, okay, no actual material gets 465 00:31:42.119 --> 00:31:45.839 cut, it's just like beautiful shots with San Francisco. Well that's what I 466 00:31:45.920 --> 00:31:49.279 was actually concerned about that because I the movie. Look, the movie's gonna 467 00:31:49.279 --> 00:31:52.640 make some leaps, as all movies do, and I was like, are 468 00:31:52.680 --> 00:31:56.319 they are they taking stuff out? But then I looked up and it was 469 00:31:56.359 --> 00:32:00.480 like ninety three minutes and that's that was okay, so the minute matchup, 470 00:32:00.519 --> 00:32:02.079 So this must be the full complete movie. It's just the weird cuts that 471 00:32:02.079 --> 00:32:06.480 are happening. Yeah, it's just the edited version for television that we saw, 472 00:32:06.519 --> 00:32:08.680 all right. So we cut to Charlie driving his convertible. He has 473 00:32:08.799 --> 00:32:15.400 enough money to live in San Francisco proper and have a very nice convertible that 474 00:32:15.480 --> 00:32:19.000 he drives around. I don't think the convertible is that nice though, Like 475 00:32:19.079 --> 00:32:21.720 it's a it's a cute car, but it's run down. It's real. 476 00:32:22.200 --> 00:32:27.240 I just I see a car and I almost go blind. So I and 477 00:32:27.319 --> 00:32:30.000 this is this is San Francisco, pre tech boom, right, not the 478 00:32:30.039 --> 00:32:34.480 San Francisco that we know today. Yeah. Way do we see Harriet's eighteen 479 00:32:34.640 --> 00:32:38.720 million dollar apartment that she lives in as an itinerant butcher. But Charlie's too. 480 00:32:38.880 --> 00:32:44.440 Charlie has this huge apartment with a beautiful view overlooking the bay, and 481 00:32:44.480 --> 00:32:50.000 I'm like, what do you do? So he's driving through the city and 482 00:32:50.039 --> 00:32:53.319 he stops at the Butcher Meets of the World. He heads into the shop 483 00:32:53.680 --> 00:32:58.720 and he meets the proprietor, Harriet Michaels played by Nancy Travis A. What 484 00:32:58.759 --> 00:33:01.240 a warm, delightful, green presence. She is not surprised at all she 485 00:33:01.240 --> 00:33:05.559 wound up in sitcoms she's someone that you love as soon as you see her 486 00:33:05.599 --> 00:33:08.279 charisma. He orders a Hagis to bring to his parents house that night, 487 00:33:08.319 --> 00:33:13.599 and this is our first little glimpse at Harriet's way. She does business as 488 00:33:13.640 --> 00:33:16.079 a person who handles raw meat. And let's let's say right now, it 489 00:33:16.079 --> 00:33:21.440 doesn't include gloves and it doesn't include a hairnet. Okay, so let's just 490 00:33:21.480 --> 00:33:24.200 put that out there. There's a lot of casual touching of meats. Yeah, 491 00:33:24.279 --> 00:33:28.119 the casual touching of meat is a great sex tape, but that this 492 00:33:28.240 --> 00:33:32.039 is not what we're getting here. That's not the club next to Rhodes's right, 493 00:33:32.480 --> 00:33:36.559 it's a different This is this is an actual butcher shop. Casual touching 494 00:33:36.559 --> 00:33:39.039 of meat is a great sextene also in San Francisco, but this is casual 495 00:33:39.079 --> 00:33:43.480 touching of meats, so it's different. Yeah. Yeah, it is a 496 00:33:43.480 --> 00:33:47.119 condemned butcher shop, which is actually where another great sex dungeon is, but 497 00:33:47.200 --> 00:33:52.480 that one is just called sex dungeon. That's right. So we cut from 498 00:33:52.480 --> 00:33:58.559 the Haggis buying incident to his parents' house to Charlie's parents' house. We immediately 499 00:33:58.599 --> 00:34:04.119 see a Scottish Hall of fame well, but also the bas City Rollers are 500 00:34:04.119 --> 00:34:07.880 playing like like before anything happens, we hear the Bay City Rollers a d 501 00:34:08.119 --> 00:34:15.760 u R day night yea. The Hall of Fame includes Sheena Easton, Alexander 502 00:34:15.840 --> 00:34:20.599 Graham, Bell, and Sean Connery. Excellent. Can I say when I 503 00:34:20.639 --> 00:34:22.760 saw Sheena Easton, I just I literally outlined. I was like, my 504 00:34:23.119 --> 00:34:30.039 baby takes the moon and Drey works like I just like instantaneously. She's got 505 00:34:30.079 --> 00:34:36.360 some great songs, sugar Walls strut. Until I saw this this time, 506 00:34:36.400 --> 00:34:38.639 I didn't realize she was Scottish. Oh really, no, I knew she 507 00:34:38.719 --> 00:34:43.599 was Scottish almost over you ugh. Great catalog. That one. We meet 508 00:34:43.719 --> 00:34:50.400 Charlie's father, Stuart, also played shockingly by Mike Myers, and his mother 509 00:34:50.559 --> 00:34:54.320 May played by Brenda Fricker. There's also a child running around that's Charlie's younger 510 00:34:54.400 --> 00:35:02.880 brother. His name is William, but the father will just heat for reasons 511 00:35:02.920 --> 00:35:07.400 that will be known in a moment. So Tony is already there. Tony 512 00:35:07.440 --> 00:35:09.199 the friend is having dinner with Charlie and his parents. Okay, so the 513 00:35:09.239 --> 00:35:14.880 whole entire point of Stuart's character is just to yell quote unquote funny things in 514 00:35:14.920 --> 00:35:19.280 a Scottish accent. This does not work for me. I know it works 515 00:35:19.320 --> 00:35:22.719 for other people, but nothing funny happens. In my opinion, with the 516 00:35:22.800 --> 00:35:28.199 father character. It doesn't annoy me as much as it does with the Charlie 517 00:35:28.320 --> 00:35:30.480 character, because I get that it's just not for me. So fine, 518 00:35:30.559 --> 00:35:35.719 like it's not for me. I would preferred him not to tell his son 519 00:35:35.880 --> 00:35:38.079 to go try on a bra ya fairy. That didn't. I didn't love 520 00:35:38.159 --> 00:35:40.840 that, But other than that, I was not offended by it. He 521 00:35:40.960 --> 00:35:45.559 does float away you fairy, and Charlie is like, oh dad, And 522 00:35:45.599 --> 00:35:49.119 I'm like, what kind of childhood did Mike Myers have? Yeah, I 523 00:35:49.199 --> 00:35:52.880 feel I feel really bad for him. To me, this all works. 524 00:35:53.039 --> 00:35:58.880 It's probably deeply offensive to Scottish people. I don't know, but it's all 525 00:35:58.920 --> 00:36:01.159 of it works for a couple of reasons. One, he commits to the 526 00:36:01.239 --> 00:36:06.960 character like like one thousand percent, which he does not do to Charlie, 527 00:36:07.039 --> 00:36:09.239 which is I think why we both find Charlie so irritating. But I find 528 00:36:09.280 --> 00:36:15.039 the father hilarious because it's just one note joke that is told with total commitment. 529 00:36:15.440 --> 00:36:19.320 But also you could tell he's ad libbing because Anthony the Polia cannot keep 530 00:36:19.400 --> 00:36:22.639 a shit together. Yeah, he's totally laughing. And the kid who plays 531 00:36:22.679 --> 00:36:25.679 William who's being made fun of, basically the idea is like, look at 532 00:36:25.719 --> 00:36:30.599 his giant head he's got. It looks like an orange on a toothpick. 533 00:36:30.159 --> 00:36:35.559 There's one line that I goddamn love and he goes it's like sputnick, spherical 534 00:36:35.679 --> 00:36:42.079 but quite pointing in parts. It's so mean, and the kid can barely 535 00:36:42.199 --> 00:36:45.599 stop laughing, like the kids like, don't laugh, don't laugh, Like 536 00:36:45.719 --> 00:36:49.760 you can tell that he's just like like making the room happy. And it's 537 00:36:49.880 --> 00:36:52.400 just I love it. I love the scene. It is exactly the perfect 538 00:36:52.440 --> 00:36:55.719 amount of stupid that I needed in the scene. So Charlie heads into the 539 00:36:55.840 --> 00:36:59.559 kitchen with his mother because for some reason doesn't want to be with his father. 540 00:37:00.000 --> 00:37:01.719 Imagine what that would be, uh, And he tells her that he 541 00:37:01.840 --> 00:37:07.159 broke up with Sherry, and May is disappointed, but she says, now, 542 00:37:07.199 --> 00:37:08.880 I understand you're terrified of marriage, and you know, maybe it's not 543 00:37:09.000 --> 00:37:13.880 such a bad thing after all. She read in the Weekly World News today 544 00:37:14.320 --> 00:37:20.320 about a female serial killer called missus X, who has married three men and 545 00:37:20.400 --> 00:37:23.480 then murdered them, and Charlie is immediately skeptical of the source. The Weekly 546 00:37:23.559 --> 00:37:28.360 World News for you young'uns out there, was like like like a tabloid rag 547 00:37:28.639 --> 00:37:32.719 bat boy kind of les quirk thing. Yeah, he actually calls his mother 548 00:37:32.760 --> 00:37:37.039 out. He's like, you're calling this the news. Yes, no, 549 00:37:37.159 --> 00:37:40.639 it's all true, Charlie. So she shows him how missus X, who's 550 00:37:40.639 --> 00:37:46.599 also known as the Honeymoon murderer, marries men under fake identities. Victim number 551 00:37:46.679 --> 00:37:52.400 one was a lounge singer in Atlantic City, Victim number two was a Russian 552 00:37:52.559 --> 00:37:57.960 martial arts expert in Miami, and Victim number three was a plumber in Dallas 553 00:37:58.079 --> 00:38:01.639 named Ralph Elliott. So Charlie is kind of like rolling his eyes this whole 554 00:38:01.719 --> 00:38:05.719 thing, and then we get one of those weird commercial cuts. I know 555 00:38:05.760 --> 00:38:07.440 why they put the commercial here. You think they would just let them leave 556 00:38:07.519 --> 00:38:09.840 the house, but whatevery case, you get a weird commercial cut. And 557 00:38:09.960 --> 00:38:15.719 then Charlie and Tony are leaving the house, Stuart is caterwauling drunkenly in the 558 00:38:15.800 --> 00:38:22.440 background, and May takes the chance to plant quite quite the smooch on Tony. 559 00:38:22.599 --> 00:38:24.719 I mean, who wouldn't want to kiss Anthony thepoclia. It's to me 560 00:38:25.000 --> 00:38:30.760 this is like the funniest performance in the movie is broke Cricker sexually harassing Tony 561 00:38:32.360 --> 00:38:38.199 because she kisses him. It seems semi like possibly innocent at first, and 562 00:38:38.320 --> 00:38:42.599 then she goes, ooh, you've turned into a right sexy one, haven't 563 00:38:42.639 --> 00:38:45.840 you. And then she just starts like planting a harder and harder kisses on 564 00:38:45.960 --> 00:38:50.400 him until he's like, please stop, please, And Charlie's just watching the 565 00:38:50.440 --> 00:38:52.480 whole thing and rolling his eyes like, there goes my mom again. And 566 00:38:52.559 --> 00:38:57.000 I'm like, oh my god, can we hope we can hope that that 567 00:38:57.159 --> 00:39:00.679 maybe Charlie and Tony became friends in their twenties and we're at friends like from 568 00:39:00.760 --> 00:39:06.519 down the block, because that's then it gets real weird. If they played 569 00:39:06.559 --> 00:39:09.719 stickball together. Yeah, no, these two definitely grew up together. Oh 570 00:39:09.920 --> 00:39:15.400 no, So there she goes comes on again, and we followed Charlie driving 571 00:39:15.440 --> 00:39:19.159 through the city. He sees Harriet outside of Meats of the World. She's 572 00:39:19.280 --> 00:39:23.800 inexplicably dressed in like a durdle with like long hair extension braids. Yeah, 573 00:39:23.800 --> 00:39:28.360 she's doing some kind of promotion I guess for like, she's also churning butter. 574 00:39:28.519 --> 00:39:30.599 I don't know if you notice that like I thought she was opening the 575 00:39:30.679 --> 00:39:32.760 awning. Oh is that what she's doing? There is a sign behind her 576 00:39:32.800 --> 00:39:36.800 that's like special on, like I don't know, Dutch ham or something. 577 00:39:37.159 --> 00:39:40.440 So but like he will go to the shop that day and she's no longer 578 00:39:40.480 --> 00:39:45.239 in this outfit. So did she only have it on to like stand outside 579 00:39:45.320 --> 00:39:50.000 like during the commuter rush hour to be like, there's Dutch meet in here, 580 00:39:50.320 --> 00:39:52.760 which is yeah, the title of my sex tape. It's Dutch meat 581 00:39:52.800 --> 00:39:55.599 in here. Hey, look at me in a durndle is the title of 582 00:39:55.679 --> 00:40:01.280 my sex tape. So okay. Meanwhile, we we go to Tony at 583 00:40:01.360 --> 00:40:05.440 his job, which remember he's a cop, so he's at a police station 584 00:40:06.159 --> 00:40:13.800 and his overly polite captain played by Alan fucking Arkin, who I fucking love 585 00:40:14.559 --> 00:40:20.559 so much this This is my favorite part of the movie. Every time Anthonopoulia 586 00:40:20.599 --> 00:40:23.000 and Alan Arkin are on screen ten out of ten, no notes, laughing 587 00:40:23.360 --> 00:40:28.880 the entire time, hilarious. The IPI I talked about how much I fucking 588 00:40:28.960 --> 00:40:32.960 love this man during Edwards's her hands, like take that up to ten. 589 00:40:34.239 --> 00:40:38.800 Like his performance in this movie is so fucking good. So his overly polite 590 00:40:38.880 --> 00:40:44.519 Captain just Captain no other name, asks him if something's wrong, and Tony 591 00:40:44.559 --> 00:40:46.199 complains that being a cop is not like when he thought it would be, 592 00:40:46.280 --> 00:40:52.480 because on TV it's like all these like shootouts and commenteering vehicles and it's all 593 00:40:52.559 --> 00:40:57.239 paperwork. All I have to do is paperwork. And the Captain's like, 594 00:40:57.360 --> 00:41:00.559 paperwork is the foundation of what we do, and really truly commentary vehicles. 595 00:41:00.599 --> 00:41:04.199 It's just it's just not done as often as you think. And he's like, 596 00:41:04.239 --> 00:41:07.280 see now and the other thing, Captain, you're too polite. You 597 00:41:07.320 --> 00:41:10.440 should be yelling at me about about threatening to report me to the commissioner. 598 00:41:10.519 --> 00:41:15.079 And Captain's like, well, you see, there really isn't a commissioner here 599 00:41:15.119 --> 00:41:17.039 in San Francisco. We have a board. It's really more of a quorum. 600 00:41:17.480 --> 00:41:22.519 And Tony's like, no, God damn it, no quorum. He 601 00:41:23.199 --> 00:41:29.360 wants a like full like like nineteen seventy five pop thriller life. And he's 602 00:41:29.400 --> 00:41:36.360 got this like incredibly sweet boss. So Charlie heads to Meats of the World, 603 00:41:36.480 --> 00:41:39.599 which is considerably busier than the day before. It's still just his rife 604 00:41:39.639 --> 00:41:45.719 with health code violation. More health code violation is now a disaster. He 605 00:41:45.920 --> 00:41:51.360 walks to the front of the line and just starts a conversation with Harriet, 606 00:41:51.480 --> 00:41:57.639 which she somehow finds attractive. PSA for this episode. The time to hit 607 00:41:57.719 --> 00:42:00.559 on a service worker is not when they are in the weeds, when they 608 00:42:00.599 --> 00:42:02.639 have eighteen things to do with their job. Don't try to strike up a 609 00:42:02.719 --> 00:42:07.679 conversation. Just shut up and get out. They are busy, they have 610 00:42:07.760 --> 00:42:14.360 shit to do. Leave them alone for God's sake. When she tries to 611 00:42:14.519 --> 00:42:17.559 work, he just walks behind the counter and into the back and just volunteers 612 00:42:17.639 --> 00:42:21.480 to work for her, being like I have butcher experience, which he doesn't. 613 00:42:22.039 --> 00:42:23.719 Well, he says his father was a butcher and so he was. 614 00:42:24.280 --> 00:42:28.119 Oh I took that as a complete lie. No, no, no, 615 00:42:28.239 --> 00:42:32.119 because she has a conversation later with the father about being a butcher. Okay, 616 00:42:32.440 --> 00:42:37.679 fine, he should be better at it then, Well, to be 617 00:42:37.800 --> 00:42:42.800 fair, he's really only matching her level of expertise. No one in this 618 00:42:42.960 --> 00:42:46.800 movie thought to ask a butcher out a butcher. Now, when you're slicing 619 00:42:46.840 --> 00:42:51.480 a flank steak, do you measure it and have a specific tool or just 620 00:42:51.559 --> 00:42:53.519 go bare handed with a machete? Because I feel like that's how I want 621 00:42:53.559 --> 00:42:57.519 to do it. She's bare, like the guy is like a quarter inch 622 00:42:57.559 --> 00:43:00.760 and then she immediately we cut to her cutting like a three stake and I'm 623 00:43:00.800 --> 00:43:05.159 like, that's not a quarterhead chariot. Come on, girl, this is 624 00:43:05.239 --> 00:43:10.119 not hard. Uh. So she agrees to have him volunteer to work with 625 00:43:10.239 --> 00:43:13.880 her, and we cut to a montage of them working together, or at 626 00:43:13.920 --> 00:43:17.519 least her working and Charlie doing quote unquote hilarious bits. This is how this 627 00:43:17.679 --> 00:43:22.880 is how she like wins her over, right, Like, he's he's different 628 00:43:22.920 --> 00:43:25.920 from her other guys who had We're gonna find out later we're sort of alpha 629 00:43:25.960 --> 00:43:30.559 males. Yeah, because he's soft and funny and charming, like that's the 630 00:43:30.760 --> 00:43:34.119 that's the whole thing, right, That's the whole game with Charlie, right, 631 00:43:34.239 --> 00:43:37.760 is that he's he's non threatening, which is why she likes him because 632 00:43:37.760 --> 00:43:40.239 she feels super threatened by the men she's been with the past. In the 633 00:43:40.320 --> 00:43:44.199 past. Oh, I didn't think about it nothing that much. We're not 634 00:43:44.320 --> 00:43:49.280 going to learn that until later. But that's basically why Charlie like wins her 635 00:43:49.360 --> 00:43:52.599 over which, which, again, in the hands of a better actor, 636 00:43:52.760 --> 00:43:57.400 may have actually read really would have worked if Seth Rogan had played this role. 637 00:43:59.000 --> 00:44:00.840 That night, they walk. They go for a walk again. Beautiful 638 00:44:00.840 --> 00:44:06.280 parts of San Francisco's shown throughout the film. She says it like it was 639 00:44:06.360 --> 00:44:08.159 really nice to get to know him a little bit better. That day she 640 00:44:08.239 --> 00:44:12.199 thanks him for he like saving her at the butcher shop, and I'm like, 641 00:44:12.760 --> 00:44:17.000 all I saw was him intimidating her customers with his bits and flinging meat 642 00:44:17.159 --> 00:44:22.239 refuse at them, and like just walking around with like bits of dangling gobs 643 00:44:22.360 --> 00:44:27.840 of beef on his on his person. It's disgusting. I ate it this 644 00:44:28.039 --> 00:44:31.599 so much, although I laughed really hard at the mom when you call them 645 00:44:31.679 --> 00:44:35.960 nurse the school nurse, please, I had an accident in shop class. 646 00:44:37.480 --> 00:44:38.960 No, I'm sorry. I wish I was there with you. I really 647 00:44:39.000 --> 00:44:43.639 do. I was not. So she's like, she's like, you're very 648 00:44:43.760 --> 00:44:45.679 nice, and he goes, oh nice, so clearly you see me as 649 00:44:45.719 --> 00:44:49.599 a woman friend, and she's like, no, no, no, I 650 00:44:49.760 --> 00:44:52.000 just mean that. You know, you seem like you've never done a bad 651 00:44:52.039 --> 00:44:53.199 thing in your life. And he's like, oh, I've done evil things 652 00:44:53.239 --> 00:44:55.400 and she's like evil and he's like she's like, how evil. And he's 653 00:44:55.440 --> 00:44:59.199 like so evil. So they're kind of playing this flirty game, right, 654 00:44:59.320 --> 00:45:01.519 and she's like, tell me one terrible thing you've done, and he throws 655 00:45:01.559 --> 00:45:05.639 the question back at her, and he's like, tell me about something evil 656 00:45:05.800 --> 00:45:08.159 that you've done, and she's like, describe evil. And he goes, 657 00:45:08.239 --> 00:45:12.800 well, how many people have you brutally murdered? And then Nancy Travis, 658 00:45:13.079 --> 00:45:15.000 still flirting, still doing this thing, but she steps back a little bit 659 00:45:15.599 --> 00:45:19.559 and she goes, well, I mean, what even is brutal? Anyway? 660 00:45:19.800 --> 00:45:23.800 With someone describes as brutally murdered, someone else might think was just perfectly 661 00:45:23.880 --> 00:45:30.559 reasonable. And he's like okay. Then they're walking through the Palace of Fine 662 00:45:30.639 --> 00:45:35.679 Arts, these two Russian sailors picture Russian sailors in your head. You got 663 00:45:35.719 --> 00:45:38.239 it, stop nailed it. You're good. You've hit two men, like 664 00:45:38.519 --> 00:45:43.599 basically extras in a movie walk past her and they say, like kat call 665 00:45:43.679 --> 00:45:46.559 her in Russian and she turns around and she has an exchange with them in 666 00:45:46.639 --> 00:45:50.599 Russian. I did not have the subtitles on. I don't know if it's 667 00:45:50.599 --> 00:45:53.679 explained at all in the subtitles of the film. I genuinely could not figure 668 00:45:53.679 --> 00:45:57.760 out how to turn the subtitles on on AMC plus. I don't know what 669 00:45:58.000 --> 00:46:02.559 is going on with that app should be easier. We let's read AMC plus 670 00:46:02.639 --> 00:46:07.880 for filth. Like first, I legitimately googled how to do it and tried 671 00:46:07.920 --> 00:46:12.920 to follow the instructions and could not do it. Oh my god. So 672 00:46:13.079 --> 00:46:15.559 she yells at them in Russian and then Charlie is like, so you speak 673 00:46:15.639 --> 00:46:19.599 Russian and she's like, yep, just the thing I picked up in my 674 00:46:19.719 --> 00:46:22.800 travels. And she just keeps moving on. She asks Charlie what do you 675 00:46:22.880 --> 00:46:25.559 look for in a woman? And he goes, well, most people would 676 00:46:25.559 --> 00:46:30.400 say sense of humor, but I'd have to go with breast size. I 677 00:46:30.599 --> 00:46:34.079 left. I liked it. He actually delivered the joke. It's a good 678 00:46:34.159 --> 00:46:37.880 joke, and he delivered it without commenting on it. M M. This 679 00:46:37.079 --> 00:46:39.519 is when he like, He's like, come, Nadia, let us dance 680 00:46:39.639 --> 00:46:43.719 like Children of the Night. And they start to like she starts to like 681 00:46:44.320 --> 00:46:46.280 fake ballet through the Palace of Fine Arts, and she's like, okay, 682 00:46:46.400 --> 00:46:50.880 why not and she does it too. You can see her like decide to 683 00:46:50.960 --> 00:46:54.320 be uncool with him. He is deeply, deeply uncool, huh. And 684 00:46:54.400 --> 00:46:58.199 I think that's one thing she likes about him. Right. Yeah. We 685 00:46:58.360 --> 00:47:05.800 cut to Harriet's enormous apartment, levels, stairways, windows, like everything. 686 00:47:06.159 --> 00:47:08.440 Just eight million, ten million dollars now, I don't know, oh, 687 00:47:08.719 --> 00:47:13.760 twenty million dollars. Now. She goes to make them tea and Charlie's like, 688 00:47:13.800 --> 00:47:16.239 you know what this apartment needs a really oversized poster of Atlantic City. 689 00:47:16.280 --> 00:47:20.639 Oh, you've got one right there, right, And Harriet says she used 690 00:47:20.639 --> 00:47:22.920 to live there, and then he walks a few feet in and he finds 691 00:47:22.960 --> 00:47:28.159 a display of martial arts weaponry on the exposed brick wall and he asks Harriet 692 00:47:28.199 --> 00:47:29.800 about it, and she says, oh, I had a friend who was 693 00:47:29.800 --> 00:47:31.400 an expert and the kind of got into it and I thought it would just 694 00:47:31.480 --> 00:47:36.519 kind of look cool there. And Charlie kind of sheepishly admits that, look, 695 00:47:36.800 --> 00:47:38.960 I really want to kiss you, but I'm afraid of moving too fast 696 00:47:39.079 --> 00:47:43.440 and spending the night together too soon. And Harriet says, I want to 697 00:47:43.440 --> 00:47:45.920 spend the night together, and Charlie says, I have no problem with that. 698 00:47:45.440 --> 00:47:47.280 Again, this is cute. This, I enjoyed it. This, 699 00:47:47.400 --> 00:47:51.880 I don't like this Moment's like this when he's being real and like, I 700 00:47:51.920 --> 00:47:54.599 don't doesn't know how we respond exactly the opposite this movie, because those like 701 00:47:54.639 --> 00:47:58.320 I don't think it's a particularly good performance in that, but I do think 702 00:47:58.360 --> 00:48:00.320 it's the best that Mike Myers can do. See. That's what bothers me 703 00:48:00.559 --> 00:48:06.039 is he's not doing like like he's just not like a normal guy ever, 704 00:48:06.320 --> 00:48:09.199 And I'm like, just be a normal guy. That night, Charlie wakes 705 00:48:09.320 --> 00:48:14.920 up to Harriet shrieking the name Ralph in her sleep. I I don't think 706 00:48:14.960 --> 00:48:16.360 I talk in my sleep. I've never been in bed with someone who talks 707 00:48:16.480 --> 00:48:21.639 their sleep. But do people who talk in their sleep actually shriek this loudly 708 00:48:21.679 --> 00:48:24.159 and not wake themselves? Okay? So I had a roommate in college, 709 00:48:24.559 --> 00:48:29.000 okay who used to sing to herself in her sleep. She was a music 710 00:48:29.119 --> 00:48:38.519 major. Ooh, and like full fucking songs. It was weird Rogester and 711 00:48:38.599 --> 00:48:46.079 Hammerstey like that full fucking songs. If I loved you, it was. 712 00:48:46.519 --> 00:48:51.360 And I was like, how is she not waking up? Like like why 713 00:48:51.679 --> 00:48:54.599 why does she not know she's doing this? Okay, so I guess people 714 00:48:54.679 --> 00:48:59.760 can't do that. They can do it. Uh So anyway, he wakes 715 00:48:59.800 --> 00:49:01.480 Howry it up and he says, oh, you're saying the name Ralph, 716 00:49:01.599 --> 00:49:07.239 and she explains, Oh, she's my friend. She she's my friend, 717 00:49:07.360 --> 00:49:09.960 she says, and she goes back to sleep. The next morning, Charlie's 718 00:49:10.000 --> 00:49:14.519 wandering through the apartment. He's he's by the way undressed. He's wearing like 719 00:49:14.599 --> 00:49:19.599 his underwear and a shirt right yep, because he thinks they're alone. He 720 00:49:19.760 --> 00:49:22.800 spots a woman taking a shower on the second floor through like opaide glass. 721 00:49:22.880 --> 00:49:27.400 Because again, this apartment is insane, it's a mansion, an apartment in 722 00:49:27.519 --> 00:49:30.639 apartment clothing. So he's like, ooh, let's let's go. Let me 723 00:49:30.719 --> 00:49:34.119 go and surprise my friend in the shower. So he walks up to the 724 00:49:34.159 --> 00:49:37.840 shower door, he opens it, and unfortunately, when he opens the door, 725 00:49:37.920 --> 00:49:43.320 it is not Harriet in there. It is Rose, Harriet's sister played 726 00:49:43.440 --> 00:49:47.079 by Amanda Plumber. Yeah, Charlie screams, oh my god, I'm sorry, 727 00:49:47.239 --> 00:49:51.119 I'm so sorry, and he closes the door. She doesn't even react, 728 00:49:51.480 --> 00:49:53.440 she doesn't even blink. She's like, hey, what's up, okay, 729 00:49:53.679 --> 00:49:57.679 and she turns back around and finishes taking a shower. He runs out 730 00:49:57.679 --> 00:50:00.880 of the bathroom. Yep. He immediately gets dressed and he goes back downstairs, 731 00:50:01.239 --> 00:50:06.000 he finds Rose sitting on the couch, fully dressed, smoking a cigarette, 732 00:50:06.000 --> 00:50:07.360 and he looks upstairs and like back down at her and be like, 733 00:50:07.440 --> 00:50:12.719 how the fuck did you beat me down here? So she's like, I'm 734 00:50:12.760 --> 00:50:15.519 Harriet's sister, and he's like, oh, you know, I didn't know 735 00:50:15.599 --> 00:50:17.360 she had a sister. And he's like, she never mentioned me. He's 736 00:50:17.400 --> 00:50:20.599 like, well, no, I just met her yesterday, and he goes 737 00:50:20.719 --> 00:50:22.280 and she goes, but you slept together, and he's like, okay, 738 00:50:22.840 --> 00:50:28.159 anyway, I gotta go. She's intense, is what I'm getting at. 739 00:50:28.199 --> 00:50:34.239 She is so fucking intense. She the sister explains that the two of them 740 00:50:34.360 --> 00:50:38.400 live together. It's basically Rose's apartment, palatial fucking estate of an apartment. 741 00:50:38.760 --> 00:50:43.480 Who knows what Rose does for a living. And Harriet just kind of comes 742 00:50:43.559 --> 00:50:45.800 and goes. She's like, Harriet left you a note and she and he's 743 00:50:45.840 --> 00:50:47.719 like okay. She looks like she's about to hand him the note, and 744 00:50:47.719 --> 00:50:52.039 then she turns around and she just reads it out loud and she's like, 745 00:50:52.159 --> 00:50:54.719 dear Charlie, please help yourself to anything in the kitchen, and then she 746 00:50:54.760 --> 00:50:58.719 giggles. He goes thanks for the hot dog. We did see them eating 747 00:50:58.760 --> 00:51:01.599 hot dogs the night before. Then it's a wink wink kind of joke. 748 00:51:04.159 --> 00:51:06.239 Charlie's like, I gotta go, and Rose is like, wait, wait, 749 00:51:06.239 --> 00:51:07.159 wait, let me let me make you breakfast, and Charlie's like, 750 00:51:07.199 --> 00:51:08.679 no, really, I don't need breakfast. And she's like, well, 751 00:51:08.719 --> 00:51:13.840 how would you like some pancakes and first squeeze orange juice, a couple of 752 00:51:13.920 --> 00:51:19.039 eggs, some bacon, and then smash cut to her serving him like fruit 753 00:51:19.079 --> 00:51:22.519 loops, a bowl, no milk, and she's like, I didn't have 754 00:51:22.559 --> 00:51:25.000 any of that other stuff. And instead of just like fucking getting up and 755 00:51:25.119 --> 00:51:28.760 leaving, Charlie's like, I guess I have to have a conversation with Rose 756 00:51:28.800 --> 00:51:30.039 now. Rose, by the way, is sitting across from him, not 757 00:51:30.159 --> 00:51:35.320 eating, just sketching Charlie and then try and sketch book. So Charlie tries 758 00:51:35.360 --> 00:51:38.280 to get some information about like the martial arts guy and Ralph from Rose, 759 00:51:38.360 --> 00:51:40.400 and Rose is like, oh, she told you about them, and he's 760 00:51:40.400 --> 00:51:45.239 like not really, and she just laughs, like literally laughs at him and 761 00:51:45.280 --> 00:51:50.920 then keeps sketching and doesn't say a word. And he's like, okay, 762 00:51:51.400 --> 00:51:52.840 well I'm gonna go then, and he gets up to leave, and Rose 763 00:51:52.960 --> 00:51:57.000 is like, I promise I won't tell Harriet that anything happened between us, 764 00:51:57.159 --> 00:51:59.519 and he goes. But nothing did happen between us, and she goes. 765 00:52:00.000 --> 00:52:05.039 I don't worry, Charlie, just be careful, yeah, and smiles creepily. 766 00:52:05.360 --> 00:52:14.000 Two Princes Kixon. We watched Charlie and Tony head out for a tour 767 00:52:14.079 --> 00:52:17.920 of Alcatraz. What does Charlie do? We have never seen him at work? 768 00:52:19.199 --> 00:52:22.239 Like, honestly, the movie maybe posits that he earns money as a 769 00:52:22.280 --> 00:52:24.880 poet, but I do Yeah, I don't see how we've seen his poetry 770 00:52:25.039 --> 00:52:29.199 and no, and at one point he actually tells you his poetry sucks. 771 00:52:29.440 --> 00:52:32.360 He knows. This tour is led by Phil Hartman. Phil Hartman's doing his 772 00:52:32.440 --> 00:52:37.360 Phil Hartman thing. It's very funny until there's a whole prison bitch got murdered 773 00:52:37.360 --> 00:52:40.519 and defiled for days run that. I was like, Okay, well, 774 00:52:40.639 --> 00:52:45.119 now we've gone nineties. We've gone really nineties with this. I don't care 775 00:52:45.199 --> 00:52:47.599 for it. Well, all this is going on, Charlie tells Tony how 776 00:52:47.679 --> 00:52:51.960 smitten he is with Harriet. He is, I don't want to overthink this, 777 00:52:52.519 --> 00:52:54.199 you know I always do that. You have to promise to help me 778 00:52:54.480 --> 00:52:58.159 not screw this up with Harriet because think it could be really something great. 779 00:52:58.559 --> 00:53:01.599 There she goes again, kicks on, and we get a montage of Charlie 780 00:53:01.639 --> 00:53:07.440 and Harriet growing closer. He continues to apparently volunteer at meets of the World, 781 00:53:07.840 --> 00:53:09.480 which now makes her his boss. Kind of. The whole thing is 782 00:53:09.719 --> 00:53:15.239 very weird, but we end up at the Fog City Diner where Charlie and 783 00:53:15.360 --> 00:53:21.760 Harriet are double dating with Tony and his girlfriend Susie, played by an unexpected 784 00:53:21.800 --> 00:53:24.800 Debbie Masar. This movie really does give a lot. They're playing a game 785 00:53:24.840 --> 00:53:30.000 of like would you rather and're trying to like out discuss each other. One 786 00:53:30.039 --> 00:53:32.719 of them, by the way, though, is would you rather watch synchronized 787 00:53:32.719 --> 00:53:37.079 swimming or shit your pants on the Brooklyn Bridge? And I'm like, okay, 788 00:53:37.800 --> 00:53:42.039 I don't love synchronized swimming, but I feel like that is very clearly 789 00:53:42.440 --> 00:53:45.920 I know. I was like, no, that's not good. Yeah, 790 00:53:45.320 --> 00:53:50.239 not the Brooklyn Bridge, got the Bay Bridge or whatever it was. So 791 00:53:50.920 --> 00:53:53.519 anyway, the game ends when Susan doesn't quite get what they're doing. It 792 00:53:53.559 --> 00:53:57.400 doesn't escalate it at all. She's just like, or would you rather get 793 00:53:57.440 --> 00:54:01.960 electrocuted? And everyone's like oh oh, and she's like, well, I 794 00:54:02.039 --> 00:54:09.559 was electrocated once and it wasn't fun. The check arrives, the two men 795 00:54:09.719 --> 00:54:14.360 bicker about who's going to pay, and tell Harriet, speaking for all of 796 00:54:14.440 --> 00:54:16.039 us, just takes the check and pays it. I mean, she is 797 00:54:16.159 --> 00:54:20.119 Charlie's boss as near as I can tell, so that's maybe she can write 798 00:54:20.159 --> 00:54:22.280 it off also Charlie. Like we see Charlie's parents, we know he doesn't 799 00:54:22.320 --> 00:54:29.639 come from money truly. What does Charlie do? After it's a downpour and 800 00:54:29.760 --> 00:54:31.920 Tony and Susan grab a cab, but Harriet and Charlie decide they're going to 801 00:54:31.960 --> 00:54:36.960 walk home in the rain, and Harriet is smiling. She tells him I 802 00:54:37.000 --> 00:54:39.679 feel safe with you, Charlie. I could see us staying together forever. 803 00:54:40.280 --> 00:54:45.519 And as she says forever, her voice echoes and lightning crashes and thunder rolls. 804 00:54:45.679 --> 00:54:49.800 The next night, Charlie arrives at his parents' house with Harriet. He 805 00:54:49.960 --> 00:54:52.280 mentions that in two weeks will be throwing them a surprise that's not a surprise, 806 00:54:52.320 --> 00:54:57.599 actually a thirtieth anniversary party, right, so we get a little setup 807 00:54:57.639 --> 00:55:00.840 of things to come. He introduces the girl to his parents, May and 808 00:55:00.920 --> 00:55:06.519 Stuart. They're very charmed by her. Stuart walks up to her and like 809 00:55:06.800 --> 00:55:10.639 from behind and puts his hand on Harriet's shoulder really really hard. She goes 810 00:55:10.679 --> 00:55:15.519 into like full black widow mode and just like almost breaks his arm and he's 811 00:55:15.519 --> 00:55:16.639 like, ah. She's like, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry. 812 00:55:16.880 --> 00:55:22.840 I just don't like to be startled. Stuart is very impressed by how by 813 00:55:22.920 --> 00:55:27.840 Harriet's like strength and fierceness. Charlie is a little put off. He's a 814 00:55:27.880 --> 00:55:32.159 little like the fuck was that right. May immediately pulls Harriet aside and she's 815 00:55:32.199 --> 00:55:36.360 like, let me show you pictures of Charlie when he was a baby, 816 00:55:36.559 --> 00:55:38.159 and Charlie's like, oh no, don't do that, mom, and then 817 00:55:38.159 --> 00:55:43.159 he excuses himself to go to the bathroom. Inside the bathroom, he finds 818 00:55:43.239 --> 00:55:45.840 the weekly World news story, the one that from the earlier in the film 819 00:55:45.880 --> 00:55:52.119 about missus X, a lounge singer in Atlantic City, a martial arts expert 820 00:55:52.599 --> 00:56:00.159 in Miami, and a plumber named Ralph in Dallas. He's like putting things 821 00:56:00.199 --> 00:56:05.119 together, the pieces together with this woman that he's met who's shown to herself 822 00:56:05.159 --> 00:56:08.679 to be extremely good at self defense if nothing else right, and handy with 823 00:56:08.719 --> 00:56:14.199 a knife, and very handy with a butcher knife. So on the drive 824 00:56:14.400 --> 00:56:16.199 home that night, he is in the full panic mode. She is just 825 00:56:16.280 --> 00:56:20.400 babbling on about how lovely his parents are, and You're like, yeah, 826 00:56:20.440 --> 00:56:22.400 they're eccentric, but they're charming. And I thought your whole family was so 827 00:56:22.519 --> 00:56:25.320 sweet. And he's like, tell me more about your martial arts friend. 828 00:56:25.920 --> 00:56:29.440 Where was that was that here in San Francisco? She goes, no, 829 00:56:29.679 --> 00:56:32.639 it was in Miami and he's like, oh uh, and before that's when 830 00:56:32.679 --> 00:56:36.559 you lived in Atlantic City, right, that's when you lived in Atlantic City. 831 00:56:36.639 --> 00:56:38.079 And she's like, I don't like talking about that period of my life, 832 00:56:38.199 --> 00:56:42.000 Charlie, and she like shuts it down, and so he is just 833 00:56:42.760 --> 00:56:46.000 terrified. The next night, Charlie lies awake next to Harriet and she is 834 00:56:46.119 --> 00:56:51.320 mumbling the name Ralph in her sleep. Again. Yeah, So he decides 835 00:56:51.400 --> 00:56:53.880 he's got to do something. He heads to the police station and he gets 836 00:56:53.920 --> 00:56:59.239 his friend Tony and he tells Tony that he thinks that he's dating missus X. 837 00:56:59.519 --> 00:57:05.559 Tony said two words therapy excellent. No, No, Charlie won't let 838 00:57:05.639 --> 00:57:07.079 it go, and Tony says, look, you're just freaking out about liking 839 00:57:07.119 --> 00:57:10.800 Harriet so much. You're terrified of marriage. This is exactly what you told 840 00:57:10.840 --> 00:57:15.639 me about on Alcatraz with Phil Hartman. Come on. Charlie is like, 841 00:57:15.719 --> 00:57:19.599 look, just just at least read the article, and Tony reads aloud that 842 00:57:19.800 --> 00:57:23.440 victim number one, the lounge singer made a name for himself for being able 843 00:57:23.519 --> 00:57:28.719 to sing only You in six languages. Is a great line here where Tony 844 00:57:28.840 --> 00:57:30.239 is like, well, does she even know the words to only you? 845 00:57:30.360 --> 00:57:32.400 And he goes, no, Tony, we haven't hit that all. Two 846 00:57:32.480 --> 00:57:36.920 crucial phase of do you know the words to only you? Part of our 847 00:57:36.960 --> 00:57:40.960 relationship Erica, do you know the words to only you? Of course I 848 00:57:42.079 --> 00:57:45.519 do. Of course I do. Paul, of course we grew up in 849 00:57:45.559 --> 00:57:47.559 a platter's household. Paul. Okay, do I know it? It's Spanish? 850 00:57:47.800 --> 00:57:52.719 Yes, yes, of course I do. So Charlie begs Tony just 851 00:57:52.800 --> 00:57:55.440 look, just look it up, please, just look it up. So 852 00:57:55.599 --> 00:58:00.119 he does, with the help of a coworker named Kathy played by Linnell I 853 00:58:00.239 --> 00:58:02.719 know again. I was like, oh my goodness, Every even small part 854 00:58:02.840 --> 00:58:07.400 is played by someone like some famous comedian. Yeah, they determined. Okay, 855 00:58:07.440 --> 00:58:09.960 this is what the movie says. It makes no sense, listeners, 856 00:58:10.000 --> 00:58:14.440 I know this makes no sense. This is what the movie says. The 857 00:58:14.639 --> 00:58:19.239 husbands were reported missing on their honeymoons, but so were the wives. There's 858 00:58:19.320 --> 00:58:22.159 no proof of any foul play. They could have just moved away to wear 859 00:58:22.360 --> 00:58:27.880 Sweden. Let's just spoil the movie right now. Harriet is not the murderer 860 00:58:28.000 --> 00:58:30.559 Roses. But then that means that Harriet would have married all these men under 861 00:58:30.599 --> 00:58:36.320 her real name, because she's right, she's not a con artist. Yeah, 862 00:58:36.599 --> 00:58:42.679 she's just a butcher's butcher and it's yeah, she would have married Ralph 863 00:58:42.960 --> 00:58:47.519 but the plumber under her actual name. So then she would have also gone 864 00:58:47.599 --> 00:58:53.199 missing at the same time. But she's not missing. She's San Francisco with 865 00:58:53.360 --> 00:58:58.480 her sister, living her life and owning a business that's been registered to the 866 00:58:58.599 --> 00:59:01.719 state. Zoom, well maybe not given what the Health code. Clearly the 867 00:59:01.760 --> 00:59:07.519 Health Department has not visited that. That is an underground butchery. This is 868 00:59:07.519 --> 00:59:14.599 an underground abatoir. That knight at Harriet's Charlie hears a story on a current 869 00:59:14.679 --> 00:59:17.519 affair, Remember a current affair? I do I had such a flashback to 870 00:59:17.639 --> 00:59:22.480 a current affair and now you like when you think back, I'm like, 871 00:59:22.599 --> 00:59:27.559 was it always that sensational, which I think it was like like in the 872 00:59:27.679 --> 00:59:31.320 eighties and nineties when it when the government just wanted to terrify everybody into obedience 873 00:59:31.400 --> 00:59:36.800 and getting all of these ridiculous news stories where it's like this is on the 874 00:59:36.920 --> 00:59:38.360 rise in the US, and it's like, yeah, there were twelve last 875 00:59:38.440 --> 00:59:42.960 year, there's fifteen this year. Like I still don't think like wolf attacks 876 00:59:43.000 --> 00:59:45.519 are the leading cause for us to be scared of dying. Well, a 877 00:59:45.639 --> 00:59:50.239 current affair, A current affair didn't go away. It just took a lot 878 00:59:50.320 --> 00:59:52.880 of steroids and became the Internet. The right, that's it. It's just 879 00:59:52.960 --> 00:59:59.400 the internet. In Fox News. It metastasized. So there's a report that 880 00:59:59.559 --> 01:00:05.199 poisoned on the rise in the US, and most people are poisoned by someone 881 01:00:05.280 --> 01:00:10.679 they know and maybe even love. Suddenly Harriet appears and she's like, Charlie, 882 01:00:12.159 --> 01:00:15.079 I have a surprise for you, and she pulls up what she calls 883 01:00:15.159 --> 01:00:19.760 a health shake, but is just a strawberry soda, right, that is 884 01:00:19.840 --> 01:00:22.960 just a cup of fanta. I thought it was pink lemonade, but yet, 885 01:00:22.039 --> 01:00:25.199 like, nothing about it looks healthy. It might as well be a 886 01:00:25.320 --> 01:00:30.000 pint glass of granulated sugar. That's what that looks like. It's also not 887 01:00:30.239 --> 01:00:34.519 thick. It doesn't have shake consistency. You can't just call something a shake. 888 01:00:35.519 --> 01:00:38.760 Words me, words mean things. It has to have ice at minimum. 889 01:00:39.480 --> 01:00:44.079 It is a Fanta. She's handing him a glass of Fanta. So 890 01:00:44.360 --> 01:00:46.559 she's like, I made you a health shake. It took me thirty minutes, 891 01:00:47.159 --> 01:00:50.559 and I put strawberries in it, And I'm like, I don't think 892 01:00:50.599 --> 01:00:52.000 she should be in the food industry. I'm just gonna say that right now. 893 01:00:52.079 --> 01:00:55.920 Did you grow the strawberries? What took so long? How much meat 894 01:00:57.039 --> 01:01:02.159 is in this shape? Oh, strawberry health shake, just just ground up 895 01:01:02.519 --> 01:01:07.400 the sheep's brain, yeah, and then some strawberries for flavor. Yeah, 896 01:01:07.840 --> 01:01:10.800 that's what she's put in this quote unquote protein shake. That is actually what 897 01:01:10.920 --> 01:01:14.599 is infanta though, just so everyone knows. Oh yeah, well no, 898 01:01:14.679 --> 01:01:16.760 no, no, no, it's actually it's cow's brain, not sheep brain. 899 01:01:16.920 --> 01:01:21.000 All right, you're right, you're right. The Coca Cola company took 900 01:01:21.039 --> 01:01:24.280 over and they really ruined the recipe. So so she's like, I made 901 01:01:24.320 --> 01:01:28.280 you a health shake just for you. She shoves it in his face basically, 902 01:01:28.280 --> 01:01:29.719 and he's like no, no, no, no, thank you. 903 01:01:29.840 --> 01:01:31.320 I can't. I simply couldn't. She's like, please, Charlie, I 904 01:01:31.400 --> 01:01:32.719 made it just for you. And he's like, no, no, no, 905 01:01:32.960 --> 01:01:36.280 I can't. I have to go brush my teeth. I have bad 906 01:01:36.320 --> 01:01:38.199 breath, and she's like, Charlie, Charlie. And eventually he gets so 907 01:01:38.280 --> 01:01:42.519 freaked out that he like tries to lock himself in the bathroom, but he 908 01:01:42.559 --> 01:01:45.000 goes into the closet instead, and she's like, fine, Charlie, don't 909 01:01:45.119 --> 01:01:47.920 drink my shake. And she goes downstairs in a huff. My ride is 910 01:01:47.960 --> 01:01:51.079 here. It's a huff, and I'm leaving in it. Why would it 911 01:01:51.119 --> 01:01:53.079 take you thirty minutes to make a health shake? And why would you do 912 01:01:53.239 --> 01:01:55.159 that and not tell someone you were making it? What if he could have 913 01:01:55.199 --> 01:01:58.280 been like, I'm not hungry, thanks, I don't really want it, 914 01:01:58.599 --> 01:02:01.679 Like I understand that the premise of the movie forces her to act weird, 915 01:02:01.880 --> 01:02:06.159 Like I do get that. I'm not criticizing that, but it's so weird. 916 01:02:06.280 --> 01:02:07.960 It's so weird. So I'm like, Okay, I get it, 917 01:02:08.079 --> 01:02:12.880 Charlie. She is acting like a serial killer. You're right, or just 918 01:02:12.960 --> 01:02:16.639 be like you drink it first. Yeah, any serial killer worth their assault 919 01:02:16.719 --> 01:02:20.599 has built up a tolerance to any poison they plan on you things. Let's 920 01:02:20.639 --> 01:02:22.760 just say that. I mean, come on, yeah, Rose can drink 921 01:02:22.800 --> 01:02:25.480 a bucket of stryp nine. That's right, nothing at all. So later 922 01:02:25.599 --> 01:02:30.360 that night, he is laying in bed, eyes wide open, just terrified 923 01:02:30.480 --> 01:02:34.679 of his deadly girlfriend. She climbs in next to him. She apologizes. 924 01:02:34.760 --> 01:02:37.679 She's like, look, I'm sorry, I overreacted. You didn't want to 925 01:02:37.760 --> 01:02:39.000 shake. It's not a big deal. And she says, you know what 926 01:02:39.079 --> 01:02:43.400 I love about you, Charlie is I could just tell you anything and you 927 01:02:43.480 --> 01:02:45.480 won't judge me. And at this point, he's facing away from her, 928 01:02:45.559 --> 01:02:49.599 so we can see his face, but she can't write, and so she's 929 01:02:49.719 --> 01:02:54.440 like, Charlie, have you ever stood like a on a train platform with 930 01:02:54.559 --> 01:02:57.880 someone in front of you and just thought for a moment, what if I 931 01:02:58.000 --> 01:03:00.599 push them? And she like pushes him, and the look of panic that 932 01:03:00.800 --> 01:03:04.960 is like building on his face and he's like, no, actually, I've 933 01:03:04.960 --> 01:03:07.119 never thought of that because I followed the Christian ethic of thou shalt not kill 934 01:03:07.159 --> 01:03:10.760 and she's like, I know we have fun. You know what else I 935 01:03:10.840 --> 01:03:15.000 love about this? It's like how vulnerable we all are. I mean, 936 01:03:15.039 --> 01:03:17.280 think about it, Charlie, You're sleeping next to me. You have no 937 01:03:17.440 --> 01:03:20.920 defenses. I could, just, like, I don't know, stick a 938 01:03:21.039 --> 01:03:22.960 needle in your ear. And she starts to put her finger in his ear 939 01:03:23.239 --> 01:03:28.000 and he starts to scream yeah, and she's like, what is wrong with 940 01:03:28.159 --> 01:03:30.760 you? And he's like, I have an ear saying. She just gets 941 01:03:30.840 --> 01:03:35.239 really pissed and she's like fine, Charlie just goes go to sleep. I 942 01:03:35.360 --> 01:03:37.599 was just trying to explain to you why we have such a great relationship in 943 01:03:37.679 --> 01:03:40.679 the weirdest way possible. I was trying to explain to you in the fucking 944 01:03:40.800 --> 01:03:45.880 weirdest way possible. I remember on our tenth date when I told my husband, 945 01:03:46.079 --> 01:03:50.159 you know what's so great about our relationship is I sleep next to you 946 01:03:50.239 --> 01:03:52.519 and I never think about killing you. And I know I can tell you 947 01:03:52.639 --> 01:03:57.559 that I think about killing you all the time and I never do it because 948 01:03:57.559 --> 01:04:00.599 I love you. I love you so much. Ultimately, I love you 949 01:04:00.840 --> 01:04:05.119 more than I want to kill you. Visions of your demise danced like sugar 950 01:04:05.159 --> 01:04:10.119 plum fairies through my head at all times of ways I could bring about your 951 01:04:10.440 --> 01:04:14.639 your untimely departure from this mortal plane, And not once have I even put 952 01:04:15.000 --> 01:04:18.280 the beginnings of a plot together. Yeah, to carry out these visions because 953 01:04:18.320 --> 01:04:21.719 we have a good relationship. I thought about pushing someone in front of a 954 01:04:21.840 --> 01:04:26.880 train once. I even got as far as putting my hands on their shoulders, 955 01:04:27.440 --> 01:04:29.440 and they said, hey, what are you doing. I just started 956 01:04:29.519 --> 01:04:32.519 massaging their shoulders, you know, pretending that's what I was meant to do 957 01:04:32.639 --> 01:04:35.440 the whole time. And then they said, well, that's even weirder somehow, 958 01:04:35.480 --> 01:04:39.719 I'm pushing me up on the train track, so please stop, please 959 01:04:39.719 --> 01:04:42.320 stop. Oh I didn't know this person. This was just a stranger. 960 01:04:42.559 --> 01:04:45.800 Oh it was a stranger, to be clear. Yeah they did. I'd 961 01:04:45.920 --> 01:04:50.920 surprise them. It was a random businessman on the tracks. The next day, 962 01:04:51.119 --> 01:04:55.920 Charlie heads to the San Francisco Globe Offices to place an announcement for his 963 01:04:56.079 --> 01:05:00.760 parents' thirtieth anniversary. Did people do this nineteen ninety three, I guess so. 964 01:05:01.639 --> 01:05:06.400 While he's there, he overhears two employees played by Mike Haggerty aka the 965 01:05:06.480 --> 01:05:13.920 super from Friends, Kreager from Friends and Michael Richards aka Kramer from Seinfeld discussing 966 01:05:14.000 --> 01:05:18.400 obituaries and they're cracking, like like they're making like penny headlines about the way 967 01:05:18.440 --> 01:05:21.039 these people died. And the woman that Charlie's dealing with is like, you 968 01:05:21.119 --> 01:05:24.559 guys shouldn't say stuff like that, like that someone died, you know, 969 01:05:24.679 --> 01:05:27.760 And they're like, oh, women, in their defense, would I would 970 01:05:27.840 --> 01:05:30.039 make puns too if I worry? What else are you gonna do? They 971 01:05:30.119 --> 01:05:34.960 bring up an obituary of a local plumber named Ralph who moved to Dallas and 972 01:05:35.000 --> 01:05:41.079 whose corpse was just found in a sewer. Charlie is activated. He panics. 973 01:05:41.400 --> 01:05:46.000 He demands to know if Ralph's wife is mentioned. Michael Richards misinterprets Charlie's 974 01:05:46.039 --> 01:05:49.599 question is him berating him for insensitivity and freaks out at the whole office, 975 01:05:49.639 --> 01:05:54.239 which is real weird now, given how his career came to a crashing hault. 976 01:05:54.599 --> 01:05:57.440 I thought the same thing. I was like, WHOA, this read 977 01:05:57.480 --> 01:06:01.840 a lot differently before the whole fucking yeah. At least he avoided all any 978 01:06:01.880 --> 01:06:05.679 and all racial slurs in this freakout, So good on you. It's probably 979 01:06:05.800 --> 01:06:11.320 a verbatim scene from the one that took place in that nightclub. Yeah, 980 01:06:11.920 --> 01:06:15.559 so Charlie finds out from Mike Cagarty that Ralph's wife was not mentioned. This 981 01:06:15.679 --> 01:06:20.079 plumber that missus X supposedly killed was found, and we know that he went 982 01:06:20.159 --> 01:06:23.519 missing and his wife was missing at the same time, but her body is 983 01:06:23.599 --> 01:06:27.239 nowhere to be found, which implies that she is still alive. By the 984 01:06:27.239 --> 01:06:29.840 way, the first person they're talking about is a tourist who had a heart 985 01:06:29.840 --> 01:06:32.440 attack on one of the trams, and one of them says, well, 986 01:06:32.440 --> 01:06:35.679 I guess he left his heart in San Francisco. You know what, that's 987 01:06:35.679 --> 01:06:40.480 a good joke. I'm going to say this right now. When I pass, 988 01:06:41.119 --> 01:06:43.880 you were allowed to make punny jokes, but the way I went only 989 01:06:44.000 --> 01:06:46.639 you. I'm so glad you're giving me permission for something I was definitely going 990 01:06:46.679 --> 01:06:49.440 to do anyway. Well, I feel like that's going to help you afterwards. 991 01:06:49.480 --> 01:06:51.920 You're gonna feel bad about it, because you definitely would have felt bad 992 01:06:51.960 --> 01:06:56.000 eventually. You know, I'm pretty sure about that. Yeah, yeah, 993 01:06:56.440 --> 01:06:59.639 yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. I love that you think I'm 994 01:06:59.639 --> 01:07:01.920 gonna I'll live you. Well, you know that's another thing I'm giving you 995 01:07:02.000 --> 01:07:09.039 here. You're the one who eats right and exercises. So Charlie takes Harriet 996 01:07:09.119 --> 01:07:14.760 on a walk to the famous San Francisco scene of the Dolores Park. I 997 01:07:14.800 --> 01:07:16.760 don't know what it's called, but it's Full House Park. As far as 998 01:07:16.800 --> 01:07:20.639 I'm concerned, it's where the family in Full House lives. I don't know 999 01:07:20.679 --> 01:07:24.239 about you, Paul. Whenever I break up with someone, I like to 1000 01:07:24.280 --> 01:07:28.079 take them to a very scenic location first. I like, I usually do 1001 01:07:28.239 --> 01:07:30.239 most of my breakups at the top of the Empire State Building, and they 1002 01:07:30.280 --> 01:07:33.480 can I can be like, but look Manhattan, and then I just run 1003 01:07:33.519 --> 01:07:36.760 away. Never tell you ever the story about the worst breakup I ever had 1004 01:07:38.079 --> 01:07:41.960 not like sad, worst, but this like funny. So I went on 1005 01:07:42.000 --> 01:07:45.480 a date with this guy and I wasn't feeling it, and I basically at 1006 01:07:45.519 --> 01:07:46.840 the end of the date, he was like, do you want to go 1007 01:07:47.000 --> 01:07:48.719 on another date? And I was like, you know, I really it's 1008 01:07:48.800 --> 01:07:50.920 very nice of you, but you know, I don't really feel a connection. 1009 01:07:51.039 --> 01:07:55.239 And he wore me down. He like argued me into going on another 1010 01:07:55.320 --> 01:07:58.519 date with him. So another date with him, and I still wasn't feeling 1011 01:07:58.599 --> 01:08:00.880 it. So iricated myself from that and then I was like, I think 1012 01:08:00.920 --> 01:08:04.639 I have to call this guy and tell him I'm sorry, Like you know 1013 01:08:04.760 --> 01:08:08.159 this is this isn't gonna happen, you know, I'm sorry, very nice, 1014 01:08:08.199 --> 01:08:11.599 good luck whatever. So I'm upset because it's not fun. It really 1015 01:08:11.639 --> 01:08:14.079 isn't like I was not looking forward to it. So I call my mom 1016 01:08:14.159 --> 01:08:16.279 and I'm like telling her, and she's like, you are overreacting so much. 1017 01:08:16.399 --> 01:08:19.279 You have been on two days with this person. You're not that great. 1018 01:08:19.560 --> 01:08:23.000 Just fucking call and be like thanks, but no thanks and move on 1019 01:08:23.119 --> 01:08:25.199 with your life. And I was like, you're right, I am blowing 1020 01:08:25.279 --> 01:08:28.399 smoke up my own ass. So I call this guy and I, you 1021 01:08:28.439 --> 01:08:30.720 know, just kind of launch into it, right. So I'm like, 1022 01:08:30.840 --> 01:08:34.640 I'm really sorry, and then I run out of words to say and there's 1023 01:08:34.720 --> 01:08:39.720 just silence, and I say are you there and he goes, yeah, 1024 01:08:39.960 --> 01:08:45.760 I'm just in the grocery store, So can I call you back? So 1025 01:08:45.319 --> 01:08:49.039 then he called me back, and then I he did, and I had 1026 01:08:49.079 --> 01:08:54.880 to break up with him for like thirty minutes. It was stage seven clinger. 1027 01:08:55.199 --> 01:08:58.159 I was like, sir, like, have some self respect. I'm 1028 01:08:58.199 --> 01:09:00.079 not interested in you, and I've tried to be nice as I can see 1029 01:09:00.159 --> 01:09:03.039 now. The ball or move would have been his if he if he'd just 1030 01:09:03.159 --> 01:09:06.880 been like, can I call you back in at the grocery store. I 1031 01:09:06.960 --> 01:09:12.199 haven't never called you back, and I would have taken that. I would 1032 01:09:12.239 --> 01:09:14.800 have been fined with that. It would have been perfect. It would have 1033 01:09:14.840 --> 01:09:16.840 been if he was just like, Okay, well, yeah, but I'm 1034 01:09:17.000 --> 01:09:20.399 I'm trying to vote right now. You have a line at the polling place. 1035 01:09:20.439 --> 01:09:24.439 Can I guess I'll call you back. I'm at the freezer section of 1036 01:09:24.479 --> 01:09:27.159 the grocery store and the door has been opened the whole time you've been talking, 1037 01:09:27.199 --> 01:09:29.439 and the ice cream is melting. So we to end this now. 1038 01:09:29.680 --> 01:09:32.159 Yeah, I gotta go. I'm I'm in the middle of a colonoscopy. 1039 01:09:32.640 --> 01:09:35.680 I shouldn't need to be awake for this. My doctors are yelling shots and 1040 01:09:35.720 --> 01:09:40.159 putting fireworks in my ass though, so I'm bad I woke up. I 1041 01:09:40.279 --> 01:09:45.760 forgot I forgot about that. So he takes her to a scenic location where 1042 01:09:45.840 --> 01:09:48.319 she can't make a scene. Although they're in a park. She could fully 1043 01:09:48.479 --> 01:09:53.079 also at San Francisco. It would be the fourteenth scene. That's that park 1044 01:09:53.319 --> 01:09:56.800 scene that day. It breaks up with her. She goes why, He 1045 01:09:56.920 --> 01:10:00.479 goes, I'm afraid you're gonna leave me, and so I'm doing a preemptive 1046 01:10:00.520 --> 01:10:03.640 strike. I'm leaving you before you can leave me. And she's like, 1047 01:10:03.760 --> 01:10:06.960 that's bullshit. This is good this, and you've just blown it and she 1048 01:10:08.079 --> 01:10:11.039 walks away again. Though if he really thinks she's the killer, he should 1049 01:10:11.079 --> 01:10:15.000 be doing more to like get her under some kind of police supervision. She 1050 01:10:15.119 --> 01:10:18.119 also crucially says, at least you left early on, which is important for 1051 01:10:18.199 --> 01:10:23.159 the Daniu mol of the movie. Yeah, we cut back to Rhodes the 1052 01:10:23.239 --> 01:10:26.560 Coffeehouse on I don't know if you noticed it's on Jack Carrowax Street. I 1053 01:10:26.640 --> 01:10:29.840 mean I did see that. It can't it can't get It's like a hat 1054 01:10:29.880 --> 01:10:32.600 on a hat on a hat. Yeah, Charlie is doing the woman poem 1055 01:10:32.640 --> 01:10:38.840 again, whoa Man, whoa Man? This time it's about Harriet. He 1056 01:10:38.960 --> 01:10:43.680 still displays pictures of the woman really man, especially I since in this one 1057 01:10:44.640 --> 01:10:49.079 he's actively accusing her of being a murderer. Yes, then he looks at 1058 01:10:49.079 --> 01:10:53.720 her picture and the part at the end where he's like, Jane, take 1059 01:10:53.800 --> 01:10:56.960 me off this crazy thing called love, and then he plows out the candle 1060 01:10:57.039 --> 01:11:00.600 to like fully end the relationship. He looks at her picture. He can't 1061 01:11:00.680 --> 01:11:03.840 do it. He just puts the candle down right without blowing it out. 1062 01:11:04.079 --> 01:11:08.239 He's still on that that crazy thing called love. He's still on that crazy 1063 01:11:08.359 --> 01:11:12.279 chain called love. A few days later, Tony calls Charlie and he says 1064 01:11:12.319 --> 01:11:15.920 that a woman has turned herself in for the murder of Ralph Elliott. Charlie 1065 01:11:16.279 --> 01:11:19.760 is thrilled. In case you're wondering, this is the scene Paul where he 1066 01:11:19.880 --> 01:11:25.479 is in his own apartment and we can't actually see his apartment very briefly. 1067 01:11:26.319 --> 01:11:29.760 He rushes to Harriet's, but she tells him to go away, and he 1068 01:11:29.840 --> 01:11:31.399 says he loves her, and she says that she loves him too, but 1069 01:11:31.600 --> 01:11:34.239 he blew it. Get out of here. I'm not interested. So what 1070 01:11:34.279 --> 01:11:40.119 does he do? Erica? He gets the band from Rhodes, gets them 1071 01:11:40.239 --> 01:11:44.600 up onto Harriet's penthouse roof a scene. A kitchen looks out onto this roof 1072 01:11:44.800 --> 01:11:51.920 space that that space is currently owned by like the guy started lift Yeah, 1073 01:11:55.119 --> 01:11:59.640 he performs an apology poem. She finds its attractive. She does a cute 1074 01:11:59.640 --> 01:12:02.600 little get over here gesture with her finger. They get back together, right, 1075 01:12:02.640 --> 01:12:05.960 so we have we have very brief breakup of Charlie and Harriet. She's 1076 01:12:05.960 --> 01:12:09.279 a little easy, if I might, if I might say, because if 1077 01:12:09.279 --> 01:12:12.199 someone did this poem to me, I'd be like, I love that. 1078 01:12:12.359 --> 01:12:15.920 You think this is what's gonna get get me to take you back. You 1079 01:12:15.039 --> 01:12:17.399 are wrong, sir. If someone did this poem to me, it would 1080 01:12:17.439 --> 01:12:20.279 make me into a serial killer. I would actually get back together with them, 1081 01:12:20.399 --> 01:12:25.119 just so I could end their lives. What if someone, Okay, 1082 01:12:26.039 --> 01:12:32.239 I actually like, there are really good performative poets out there, like like 1083 01:12:32.560 --> 01:12:38.600 like slam poetry, excellent poems. What if someone did one at you, 1084 01:12:38.720 --> 01:12:42.359 though, and it was just you, even if they were fantastic at it, 1085 01:12:42.720 --> 01:12:45.239 even if they were so good, even if it was Amanda Gorman and 1086 01:12:45.359 --> 01:12:50.319 you were just like, this is so uncomfortable. I can't actually feel myself 1087 01:12:50.439 --> 01:12:56.159 curling up towards my center, like, oh my god, please please please 1088 01:12:56.199 --> 01:13:00.520 don't do this like a solo one to one poem, hard eye contact, 1089 01:13:00.680 --> 01:13:06.279 the whole, hard eye contact, soulful earnestness coming after absolute poet to you. 1090 01:13:08.720 --> 01:13:12.840 I genuinely can't think of a worse hell. Correct, I would rather 1091 01:13:12.920 --> 01:13:16.600 be pushed on the subway tracks. Okay, a one to one poem to 1092 01:13:17.760 --> 01:13:27.800 sweet Erica. I would push Charlie and the three piece orchestra off the roof. 1093 01:13:28.039 --> 01:13:30.680 Absolutely. Yeah. So after they get back together, we cut right 1094 01:13:30.760 --> 01:13:34.479 back to Charlie and Harriet. They're having a soak in her enormous jacuzzie tub. 1095 01:13:34.560 --> 01:13:39.880 I mean this apartment. We're approaching Roman Emperor here, Like, what 1096 01:13:40.159 --> 01:13:44.159 is happening you. She's the only butcher in San Francisco, which is why 1097 01:13:44.920 --> 01:13:46.159 they let her. They let they just let her do it. She want 1098 01:13:46.199 --> 01:13:50.479 carte blanche because frankly, we're going to be under We're going to be under 1099 01:13:50.600 --> 01:13:56.239 serviced otherwise in this in this sector, we simply don't have another person in 1100 01:13:56.359 --> 01:14:00.720 the entire city that we can buy meat from. Every other meat provider in 1101 01:14:00.760 --> 01:14:03.720 San francisco's just the top. Yeah, it's just iron deficiency. It's all 1102 01:14:03.800 --> 01:14:06.199 over the city. I heard what he said. By the way, I 1103 01:14:06.279 --> 01:14:12.880 deserved a bigger laugh for that one. The only other meat that served in 1104 01:14:12.960 --> 01:14:17.920 town is during the fulsome Why do all of these men claiming to be a 1105 01:14:17.960 --> 01:14:21.640 knemick and that they need meat? Oh oh, never, I understand, 1106 01:14:21.880 --> 01:14:28.520 I'm code. Okay, So Rose knocks on the door, says, Harriet 1107 01:14:28.640 --> 01:14:32.720 has a visitor. Lo and behold it's Ralph. The female Ralph. Ralph 1108 01:14:32.800 --> 01:14:35.560 kind of looks like Linda Hamilton. For a second, I thought she was 1109 01:14:35.600 --> 01:14:41.079 Linda Hamilton. It was Linda Hamilton until she spoke she doesn't kind of look 1110 01:14:41.159 --> 01:14:45.159 like Linda Hamilton. This is Linda Hamilton's twin fucking sister. I'm so glad 1111 01:14:45.199 --> 01:14:46.640 to what is different, which is why i was like, oh wait, 1112 01:14:46.720 --> 01:14:51.159 that's definitely not Linda Hamilton's. But Jesus Christ. Yeah, Charlie is so 1113 01:14:51.359 --> 01:14:56.000 thrilled that he hugs Ralph, accidentally causing the towel around his waist to drop, 1114 01:14:56.079 --> 01:14:58.600 and this kind of acute moment, he's like, I'm naked, aren't 1115 01:14:58.640 --> 01:15:01.520 I? And then he weirdly keep back upstairs because Mike Myers can't be normal 1116 01:15:01.600 --> 01:15:04.239 for more than ten seconds. The one line, I do love yours, 1117 01:15:04.279 --> 01:15:11.640 I was just nude, very very nude. We cut to Stuart in May's 1118 01:15:11.680 --> 01:15:15.600 thirtieth anniversary party. It's a restaurant in San Francisco Somewhere. Stuart makes a 1119 01:15:15.680 --> 01:15:19.560 toast about how he's glad he married May after all, because he still loves 1120 01:15:19.600 --> 01:15:25.479 her after all, these years. Yeah, Charlie is so overcome by like 1121 01:15:25.760 --> 01:15:30.479 what he's seeing and how lovely his parents are together despite both of their inherent 1122 01:15:30.560 --> 01:15:36.439 hideousness, that he spontaneously proposes to Harriet and she goes, no, just 1123 01:15:36.520 --> 01:15:40.560 what you want to hear? Just what you want to hear. He doesn't 1124 01:15:40.600 --> 01:15:43.159 even hesitate. She goes no. It's like he's like, do you want 1125 01:15:43.199 --> 01:15:45.880 this up your butt? No? No, let's just live together, Charlie, 1126 01:15:45.880 --> 01:15:48.079 why don't we just live together? We don't have to get married. 1127 01:15:48.800 --> 01:15:51.479 And he's like, but I want to spend the next like thirty years with 1128 01:15:51.560 --> 01:15:54.439 you, and I want you to have my kids, and I want you 1129 01:15:54.520 --> 01:15:56.680 to have your kids. And it's a lot of kids, I know, 1130 01:15:57.239 --> 01:15:59.680 but I think we'd be happy together. It's cute, right, and then 1131 01:16:00.239 --> 01:16:03.640 pause for a moment to watch the parents dance. She's overcome now in the 1132 01:16:03.720 --> 01:16:08.920 moment by like seeing this lovely, like thirty year relationship that she whispers in 1133 01:16:08.960 --> 01:16:12.640 his ear yes yeah. Smash cut to the wedding, which goes off with 1134 01:16:12.720 --> 01:16:15.680 only a minor hitch as Harriet waits an exceptionally long time before saying, I 1135 01:16:15.800 --> 01:16:21.359 do a long time for everyone to sweat bagpipes start yowling, and we cut 1136 01:16:21.399 --> 01:16:26.560 to the reception at Charlie's parents' backyard, Stuart singing, do you think I'm 1137 01:16:26.600 --> 01:16:30.279 sexy with the bagpipes? May is dancing and molesting Tony. I mean she 1138 01:16:30.439 --> 01:16:34.000 could give an accurate report on the health of his prostate after this thing. 1139 01:16:34.239 --> 01:16:39.119 She is. She is an octopus. She is she arms all over him, 1140 01:16:39.199 --> 01:16:43.800 all up crevices that Tony didn't know he had. She is spreading cheek 1141 01:16:44.119 --> 01:16:47.359 okay, like it is open the I would have loved to have been on 1142 01:16:47.479 --> 01:16:54.039 set like Branda Freker was just like I'm so sorry, Like do your worst, 1143 01:16:54.479 --> 01:16:58.000 go for it. Let's do this, Brenda, come on, Brenda. 1144 01:16:59.680 --> 01:17:02.079 Tony escapes from May and he goes over to Charlie and he says, 1145 01:17:02.199 --> 01:17:05.359 look, you chose a great girl. I can't believe you ever even thought 1146 01:17:05.439 --> 01:17:10.760 she could be a murderer. And on cue the band starts up and Harriet 1147 01:17:10.840 --> 01:17:17.800 launches into a lovely version of Holy and they both stop and they look at 1148 01:17:17.840 --> 01:17:23.840 each other, and she then effortly slips into I think French. She goes 1149 01:17:23.880 --> 01:17:28.000 French, Italian, Spanish, Oh okay. She sings in at least four 1150 01:17:28.119 --> 01:17:34.520 of the six languages Stuart, Tony May, and Rose all look on emotionally 1151 01:17:34.760 --> 01:17:41.119 as Charlie and Harriet hug. We come to Charlie and Harriet driving to a 1152 01:17:41.199 --> 01:17:45.439 secluded mountain lodge for their honeymoon. It's called the Poet's Corner, right. 1153 01:17:45.199 --> 01:17:48.560 Charlie is so insufferable, everything about hers, about the fact that he's a 1154 01:17:48.640 --> 01:17:53.439 poet, and he's so into being a poet. He's just the worst. 1155 01:17:54.000 --> 01:17:57.479 Like if someone was like, I'm gonna take you to my favorite secluded getaway. 1156 01:17:57.720 --> 01:18:03.199 It's a poetry retreat me, aren't you If only he would murder me, 1157 01:18:04.000 --> 01:18:10.319 he said he's gonna write prose. He's gonna poem at you. Is 1158 01:18:10.399 --> 01:18:15.600 this what being married to Lindman Will Miranda is like, I worry that he 1159 01:18:15.800 --> 01:18:17.920 raps at that woman, and I don't like it. I don't possible. 1160 01:18:18.079 --> 01:18:21.760 It's it's not outside of the realm of possibility. Let's be honest. One 1161 01:18:21.960 --> 01:18:28.279 hundred raps at that poor poor woman. Yeah, if she murders him, 1162 01:18:28.800 --> 01:18:32.239 I will be on her side. I don't know anything about her. I 1163 01:18:32.359 --> 01:18:35.279 really don't know anything about him, but if I hear that. He even 1164 01:18:35.439 --> 01:18:39.680 once was like, hey, let me let me wrap a poem at you. 1165 01:18:40.399 --> 01:18:43.920 She threw him out the fucking window and he landed on one hundred and 1166 01:18:44.000 --> 01:18:46.279 eightieth Street. I'd be like, you know what, he had it coming. 1167 01:18:46.560 --> 01:18:53.000 If she was like what rhymes with defend straight and he's like penetrate, 1168 01:18:53.159 --> 01:18:57.279 She's like, no out out. So they're going to the Poet's Corner for 1169 01:18:57.319 --> 01:19:01.159 their honeymoon. Back at the police station, meanwhile, the captain hard nosed 1170 01:19:01.479 --> 01:19:06.720 angry seventies. He busts in and he lays into Tony for sticking his nose 1171 01:19:06.960 --> 01:19:12.560 in the Ralph Elliott case where it doesn't belong. Tony tries to explain himself, 1172 01:19:12.600 --> 01:19:15.720 but Captain, my friend was dating this woman who I don't want to 1173 01:19:15.840 --> 01:19:17.880 hear it. That's right, Tony asked if there's an update, and Captain 1174 01:19:17.920 --> 01:19:21.439 snaps at the woman, who is confessed to the to the Ralph Elliott murder 1175 01:19:21.680 --> 01:19:25.680 has confessed to other murders as well, and Tony's like, I knew it, 1176 01:19:25.920 --> 01:19:29.439 and he goes, yeah, Abraham Lincoln, Warren g. Harding and 1177 01:19:29.560 --> 01:19:32.840 Julius Caesar, she's a nut job here, a nutjob. The captain then 1178 01:19:32.880 --> 01:19:36.760 grabs Tony and slams him up against the wall and tells him not to screw 1179 01:19:36.960 --> 01:19:41.520 this up. Tony promises not to let him down, and he rushes out, 1180 01:19:41.760 --> 01:19:45.039 only to return a moment later and congratulate the captain for doing an amazing 1181 01:19:45.199 --> 01:19:48.199 job. And then Eleanor can straight out of it and he's like, really, 1182 01:19:48.279 --> 01:19:50.840 you thought that was good? You didn't think this the body slam was 1183 01:19:51.039 --> 01:19:54.119 but was this? Did that feel right to you? And he's like, 1184 01:19:54.399 --> 01:19:57.319 it was amazing. I gotta go, Captain, I really do have to 1185 01:19:57.359 --> 01:20:00.720 go. But that was perfect. You nailed it. The captain, thank 1186 01:20:00.800 --> 01:20:04.439 you, Tony, thank you all right. So Charlie and Harriet arrive at 1187 01:20:04.479 --> 01:20:09.800 Poet's Corner and checking at the front desk with Greg German. He excitedly tells 1188 01:20:09.880 --> 01:20:13.039 him that they'll probably lose power that night due to the storm. Gets some 1189 01:20:13.199 --> 01:20:16.079 candles ready and Charlie's like, ooh, sexy candles, and Harriet seems more 1190 01:20:16.479 --> 01:20:20.520 subdued. She's pensive. She's here's concerned that something might happen that night. 1191 01:20:21.239 --> 01:20:28.319 Tony meanwhile faxes pictures of Harriet to acquaintances of missus x's three murder victims, 1192 01:20:28.399 --> 01:20:31.840 all of whom confirmed that she was in fact married to these victims. This 1193 01:20:32.079 --> 01:20:36.079 genuinely feels like something that could have happened earlier when his friend asked him, 1194 01:20:36.279 --> 01:20:40.920 do you think I'm marrying dating a murderer? This is what happens when you 1195 01:20:41.000 --> 01:20:45.000 cry wolf too many times. Yeah. Yeah. Tony can't get through to 1196 01:20:45.039 --> 01:20:47.720 the hotel because quote unquote the servers are down due to the storm, so 1197 01:20:47.880 --> 01:20:50.560 he charters a plane, and as he's rushing out of the police station, 1198 01:20:50.680 --> 01:20:55.760 the captain snarls at him, Hey, Peisen, you screw up one more 1199 01:20:55.760 --> 01:20:59.960 time, I'm gonna kick a spaghetti bending butt back to Milan. Tony doesn't 1200 01:21:00.079 --> 01:21:03.399 even have time to enjoy the performance, but he does correct the captain's pronunciation 1201 01:21:03.479 --> 01:21:06.640 of paison on its way out, which I really appreciated because I was like, 1202 01:21:06.720 --> 01:21:13.159 that's not how you say that word. They also say the captain takes 1203 01:21:13.199 --> 01:21:15.279 the note thrilled, and he's like, was the ethnic slur too much? 1204 01:21:15.399 --> 01:21:18.119 And he's like, no, I don't think paison's an ethnic slur. That's 1205 01:21:18.159 --> 01:21:23.119 like, buddy, well, I think your spaghetti bending butt back to Milan 1206 01:21:23.439 --> 01:21:27.079 is the sure. Yeah, I guess that's that's a reach. You know, 1207 01:21:27.359 --> 01:21:33.199 there's worse ones about Guido, But my dad used to call all his 1208 01:21:33.279 --> 01:21:35.880 all of his buddies Paison. Yeah, but did he tell them to get 1209 01:21:35.920 --> 01:21:41.119 their spaghetti bending butts back to Milan. I'm gonna say with a fair amount 1210 01:21:41.119 --> 01:21:45.800 of confidence that the phrase spaghetti bending butt never left my father's mouth in his 1211 01:21:45.960 --> 01:21:49.119 entire life. That's what Pavarotti used to say to all his friends. That's 1212 01:21:49.199 --> 01:21:54.000 right, Yeah, it was a real three tenors thing. Baha. Back 1213 01:21:54.039 --> 01:21:57.760 at the hotel, we see Harriet take three rings on a chain out of 1214 01:21:57.800 --> 01:22:00.399 her like she keeps it in her power, in her makeup powder under the 1215 01:22:00.439 --> 01:22:03.920 puff right to hide them. So she has a chain and there's three like 1216 01:22:04.039 --> 01:22:09.199 wedding rings on it. She and Charlie head down to dinner. At dinner, 1217 01:22:09.319 --> 01:22:13.479 Charlie excuses himself to wash his hands, and Harriet, who looks something 1218 01:22:13.560 --> 01:22:17.199 between freaked out and murderous, like genuinely murderous, follows him and watches him 1219 01:22:17.199 --> 01:22:19.760 as he heads into the bathroom to make sure he is going where he says 1220 01:22:19.800 --> 01:22:24.439 he's going. Meanwhile, poor Tony is on the plane ride from Hell with 1221 01:22:24.520 --> 01:22:30.279 a pilot played by Stephen Right. In a storm, there's turbulence. Tony's 1222 01:22:30.279 --> 01:22:31.560 like, you've done this before, right, and Stephen Wright's like, yeah, 1223 01:22:31.600 --> 01:22:39.079 of course, I've done this before. Never at night though. Then 1224 01:22:39.600 --> 01:22:42.520 we find out that Stephen Wright, the pilot, is narcalyptic, and he 1225 01:22:42.640 --> 01:22:46.319 just falls asleep with the wheel and Tony wakes him up and he's like, 1226 01:22:46.359 --> 01:22:50.479 gland the plane, just land the plane. We cut back to Poets Corner 1227 01:22:50.840 --> 01:22:55.199 and Charlie receives a phone call from town. It's one of those things where 1228 01:22:55.199 --> 01:22:58.399 the where where the hotel brings the landline to your table, and you picked. 1229 01:22:59.039 --> 01:23:00.880 I would love to have that happened just once. It's too late, 1230 01:23:00.920 --> 01:23:05.119 we missed. It's gone. There's no such thing as a landline anymore. 1231 01:23:05.319 --> 01:23:09.840 We should open a hotel include landlines and have that as a service. I 1232 01:23:09.880 --> 01:23:13.720 would pay for that, certainly. Or a restaurant right where like everyone gets 1233 01:23:13.760 --> 01:23:16.159 their own, like you have an important phone call like the Kitcat Club and 1234 01:23:16.520 --> 01:23:20.720 you can call the other tables. So Charlie answers, and it's Tony. 1235 01:23:20.800 --> 01:23:26.560 He has successfully gotten off the plane, and Harry is watching suspiciously as Tony 1236 01:23:26.640 --> 01:23:30.399 relays to Charlie that you're in great danger. Look, the police are on 1237 01:23:30.479 --> 01:23:32.840 your way. Stay where you are. But she is missus X, she 1238 01:23:33.079 --> 01:23:38.600 is the killer. And then the phone goes dead before Charlie can excuse himself. 1239 01:23:38.720 --> 01:23:42.760 The whole dining room starts to celebrate their honeymoon, only you plays. 1240 01:23:42.840 --> 01:23:45.479 Everyone's getting more and more excited. This is one of those weird traditions where 1241 01:23:45.960 --> 01:23:50.039 suddenly a group of strangers is like, fuck, fuck fuck fuck, you're 1242 01:23:50.319 --> 01:23:55.520 gonna fuck tonight. They put them in a chair and then carry them to 1243 01:23:55.600 --> 01:23:59.439 the honeymoon suite. It's very This happens on Game of Thrones, and it's 1244 01:23:59.600 --> 01:24:03.800 just weird in any context. It's never not weird. Back in town, 1245 01:24:04.039 --> 01:24:08.439 Tony's like, gotta get there, so he runs up to the first car 1246 01:24:08.560 --> 01:24:12.960 he finds and it is driven by none other than the Great Charles Broden. 1247 01:24:13.359 --> 01:24:15.600 So he's like, sir, I need to comment to your vehicle, and 1248 01:24:15.720 --> 01:24:19.399 Charles Groden, Charles Groden's so hard, the straightest the faces, just goes 1249 01:24:19.840 --> 01:24:24.960 no, and he's like, please, can I comment here your vehicle And 1250 01:24:25.039 --> 01:24:27.920 he's like, I know for a fact that you're not allowed to, so 1251 01:24:28.279 --> 01:24:30.159 no, and he's like, sir, my friend is in trouble. And 1252 01:24:30.199 --> 01:24:34.399 then we cut to them driving to Poet's Corner. It's actually Charles Groden driving 1253 01:24:34.479 --> 01:24:39.840 and he's just being nice and dropping Tony off right. We cut back to 1254 01:24:39.920 --> 01:24:44.680 Poet's corner in the room, Harriet tells it terrified Charlie that there's something she 1255 01:24:44.760 --> 01:24:46.560 needs to tell him, and he's like, oh, okay, okay, 1256 01:24:46.840 --> 01:24:49.920 he's like trying to back away. She goes, Charlie, I've been married 1257 01:24:50.000 --> 01:24:53.880 before, and he says, I know, I already know. And then 1258 01:24:53.960 --> 01:24:58.560 he grabs an axe by the fireplace. Why is there an axe in this 1259 01:24:58.920 --> 01:25:00.600 room? Why is is there a lit fire when no one was in the 1260 01:25:00.680 --> 01:25:03.760 room before. That is not up to code. Don't do that, haha. 1261 01:25:04.880 --> 01:25:08.399 And he like brandishes the axe and he's like, stay away from me, 1262 01:25:08.479 --> 01:25:11.000 Harriet, I know you're the killer. Stay away from me. And 1263 01:25:11.119 --> 01:25:14.640 she is now confused. She's like, wait, what what do you mean 1264 01:25:14.760 --> 01:25:18.399 killer? And she manages to like disarmed Charlie because remember she is a martial 1265 01:25:18.479 --> 01:25:23.680 arts expert. So she throws the axe to the ground. And now he's 1266 01:25:23.840 --> 01:25:29.239 trying to like mano amano subduer. So they're struggling, and Charlie manages to 1267 01:25:29.279 --> 01:25:31.399 push her in the closet and lock it right yeah, and then he rushes 1268 01:25:31.439 --> 01:25:34.319 to the phone, but it's still dead. He finds a note next to 1269 01:25:34.359 --> 01:25:38.439 the phone that says dear Harriet, I just can't handle the commitment. It's 1270 01:25:38.479 --> 01:25:41.960 too hard. I'm leaving you, love Charlie. And he looks up from 1271 01:25:42.000 --> 01:25:44.840 the note to like ask Harriet what the fuck this is about? And he 1272 01:25:45.239 --> 01:25:49.920 just barely misses getting his nose chopped off by an axe which is being wielded 1273 01:25:50.000 --> 01:25:56.399 by Rose in a full tarp poncho No one in these clothes. She she 1274 01:25:56.680 --> 01:25:59.199 she came here to Lizzie Boordon. This shit. She's like, I'm not 1275 01:25:59.279 --> 01:26:01.760 going to get any evidence on me, and I'm going to wear a fucking 1276 01:26:01.880 --> 01:26:05.479 tarp while I do that. That's right. Rose shrieks that Charlie is just 1277 01:26:05.560 --> 01:26:10.039 trying to take her sister away, just like all the rest, and now 1278 01:26:10.640 --> 01:26:15.520 you're going to die. Harriet, who heard this holy change, is like, 1279 01:26:15.640 --> 01:26:17.039 Rose, what the fuck is wrong with you? Stop? Stop? 1280 01:26:17.079 --> 01:26:20.399 And then she tells Charlie to run. Run, Charlie run. He makes 1281 01:26:20.439 --> 01:26:24.640 his way out onto the roof. Rose pursues him, so now they're both 1282 01:26:24.720 --> 01:26:28.119 on the roof of this like this is like a gabled roof too, this 1283 01:26:28.279 --> 01:26:31.079 is not a flat roof. Meanwhile, Tony has reached the hotel room. 1284 01:26:31.159 --> 01:26:35.039 He kicks the door in and immediately frees Harriet and puts her in handcuffs. 1285 01:26:35.079 --> 01:26:36.840 Harriet's like, they're on the roof, and He's like, no, no, 1286 01:26:38.000 --> 01:26:40.680 no, no, lady, I know you're the killer. I am 1287 01:26:40.800 --> 01:26:43.960 having my Dirty Harry moment. If it kills Charlie, all right, let's 1288 01:26:44.000 --> 01:26:47.359 go. So Charlie winds up dangling off the roof, just holding on to 1289 01:26:47.439 --> 01:26:51.800 the eve by his fingers. Rose appears she's swinging the axe at his hands. 1290 01:26:53.119 --> 01:26:56.279 He manages to keep himself safe by holding on with whatever hand she's not 1291 01:26:56.439 --> 01:27:00.479 aiming at right, So he's back and forth for an experience killer. I 1292 01:27:00.520 --> 01:27:02.279 would have expect a little more efficiency from Rose. She knew to bring the 1293 01:27:02.319 --> 01:27:04.399 tarpon show. She didn't know to bring a plan, you know what I 1294 01:27:04.479 --> 01:27:08.880 mean. She's improvising now, Paul. To be clear, though, this 1295 01:27:09.079 --> 01:27:12.640 is her first axe murder. Okay, you're right. Despite the film's title, 1296 01:27:13.000 --> 01:27:16.399 it's a misnomer. It's a misdirect. It is not an axe murderer. 1297 01:27:16.960 --> 01:27:20.439 She is simply a serial killer. She does this in other ways. 1298 01:27:20.560 --> 01:27:24.279 You're right, when you're right, you're right. She's improvising, Paul. 1299 01:27:24.439 --> 01:27:30.840 It's like jazz, and she's jazz. Back in the room, Tony is 1300 01:27:30.000 --> 01:27:35.359 enjoying his moment to interrogate the killer. He's ignoring Harriet's explanations in the extremely 1301 01:27:35.439 --> 01:27:41.159 suspicious acts like thuds that we're hearing from above, the screams it is excellent. 1302 01:27:41.800 --> 01:27:45.520 She is like, Harriet is like, that is them upstairs. Rose 1303 01:27:45.600 --> 01:27:48.600 is trying to murder Charlie and he's like, Harry, you stupid bitch. 1304 01:27:48.640 --> 01:27:56.159 You just don't get it. Rose gets the axe stuck in the roof. 1305 01:27:56.319 --> 01:27:59.760 It gives Charlie a chance to get himself back up there. He flees. 1306 01:28:00.520 --> 01:28:04.520 Tony is leading Harriet out of the Poet's Corner and he looks up and he 1307 01:28:04.640 --> 01:28:09.000 sees Charlie on the roof and he's like, I'm coming, So he's rushing 1308 01:28:09.039 --> 01:28:14.000 back in now. Rose attacks Charlie again on the roof. They exchange a 1309 01:28:14.159 --> 01:28:16.239 sack whack and a cunt punt, just for a couple more laughs. This 1310 01:28:16.479 --> 01:28:19.560 might be the first time I'd ever seen that on film, and it's like, 1311 01:28:19.840 --> 01:28:24.159 to this day, delights me. She kicks him in the balls and 1312 01:28:24.239 --> 01:28:27.640 he's like, oh. And the movie does do a stupid thing where Mike 1313 01:28:27.680 --> 01:28:30.159 Meer spikes the camera here, which sucks. But then the thing you don't 1314 01:28:30.199 --> 01:28:35.079 see coming is. He kicks her back in the crotch and she goes, 1315 01:28:35.359 --> 01:28:45.680 oh h. He finally manages to overpower Rose, and now she's hanging off 1316 01:28:45.760 --> 01:28:47.399 of the side of the roof. He's holding on to her. Her only 1317 01:28:47.439 --> 01:28:50.840 grip is his hand. He's unwilling to let her fall. And then Tony 1318 01:28:51.279 --> 01:28:57.479 appears at the window from one level below and he grabs Rose and pulls her 1319 01:28:57.520 --> 01:29:02.399 inside. We cut to Tony loadings into a police car while Charlie inflicks I 1320 01:29:02.479 --> 01:29:08.640 mean performs another poem in voiceover, and we eventually cut to Rhodes in his 1321 01:29:08.760 --> 01:29:14.319 performance of this poem, which all about Harriet, Sweet harrietrit. It involves 1322 01:29:14.359 --> 01:29:20.920 squawking because there's a bird metaphor yep, so love ed Harriet watches him with 1323 01:29:21.039 --> 01:29:27.279 a big, beautiful Nancy Travis grinn on her face and that is the end 1324 01:29:27.520 --> 01:29:30.880 of so I married an ex murderer. So, just to be clear for 1325 01:29:30.000 --> 01:29:35.760 everyone listening, Harriet married these three men, Rose killed them on the honeymoon 1326 01:29:35.840 --> 01:29:40.279 and wrote this note. So Harriet thought that she had been being left by 1327 01:29:40.319 --> 01:29:43.319 all of her husbands on the honeymoon, which is why she was so keyed 1328 01:29:43.399 --> 01:29:47.159 up on the honeymoon because she was scared that Charlie was gonna make it four 1329 01:29:47.479 --> 01:29:51.520 and just leave her. Yeah, she didn't notice that those notes were written 1330 01:29:51.560 --> 01:29:56.399 in her sister's handwriting. I don't know that anyone comes off as a good 1331 01:29:56.479 --> 01:29:59.359 detective in this movie, you know what I mean? Anyone comes off as 1332 01:29:59.399 --> 01:30:02.800 a good judge character. Yeah, yeah, all right, so stick around. 1333 01:30:02.840 --> 01:30:06.760 We'd be right back with random observations and final ratings for So I'm married 1334 01:30:06.800 --> 01:30:19.359 an axe murderer and we're back, Erica, do you have any final little 1335 01:30:19.439 --> 01:30:23.960 clues, any fingerprints from the dust that you've picked up that you wanted to 1336 01:30:24.000 --> 01:30:28.479 share with everybody before we put this one to bed. I'm gonna do all 1337 01:30:28.520 --> 01:30:31.600 of mine in the form of a beat poem. Okay, I did haiku, 1338 01:30:31.880 --> 01:30:35.239 so a lot of poetry happening. Now I might do a limerick. 1339 01:30:35.840 --> 01:30:41.159 Okay, Yeah, I'm definitely gonna do a dirty limerick. So I have 1340 01:30:41.239 --> 01:30:45.520 a couple of fashion moments. As we know, the early nineties not good 1341 01:30:45.560 --> 01:30:49.439 for anyone, no one, frankly. But there's one horrible moment in one 1342 01:30:49.479 --> 01:30:54.000 wonderful moment related to Harriet that I want to discuss. Number one, the 1343 01:30:54.079 --> 01:30:58.079 horrible moment I'm just gonna get it out of the way. The sunflower scrunchy 1344 01:30:58.359 --> 01:31:01.159 that she wears when she's in the butcher. Yes, it is a crime 1345 01:31:01.199 --> 01:31:09.199 against fashion and humanity. Those fucking sunflowers were everywhere. Yeah, there was 1346 01:31:09.279 --> 01:31:14.439 a there was a perfume called Sunflowers, Paul, and I am so embarrassed 1347 01:31:14.479 --> 01:31:18.720 to admit this, so embarrassed to admit this. But I had shorts that 1348 01:31:18.880 --> 01:31:24.880 had a sunflower design on them, and you wore them proudly. One of 1349 01:31:24.960 --> 01:31:30.960 those blossom hats with an enormous fake sunflower on it. What was the sunflower 1350 01:31:31.159 --> 01:31:35.199 mafia doing to all of us in the nineties. Why Big Sunflower had a 1351 01:31:35.239 --> 01:31:40.640 hold on the culture. That's what happened. Big Sunflower was it was everywhere. 1352 01:31:40.640 --> 01:31:45.279 It was the Stanley Cup of its day. It was everywhere. Inexplicably 1353 01:31:45.840 --> 01:31:48.479 the good the good fashion moment. I do want to call out, and 1354 01:31:48.600 --> 01:31:53.159 this is a rare one because we almost never get these, Paul. I 1355 01:31:53.199 --> 01:31:54.760 think, I think, I think I know what you're gonna say. I 1356 01:31:54.800 --> 01:31:58.920 think I agree with you. This movie has one of the very few lovely 1357 01:31:59.039 --> 01:32:02.920 wedding dresses. Yes, I thought she looked so good. I loved this 1358 01:32:03.079 --> 01:32:08.439 wedding dress. It was like form fitting but long and sexy, and then 1359 01:32:08.479 --> 01:32:12.039 it had like this hood that was also like attached to like almost a cowl. 1360 01:32:12.399 --> 01:32:15.079 Yes, very like like like almost sci fi looking almost like a Dune 1361 01:32:15.159 --> 01:32:18.479 priestess, but like not over the top. Oh, I was gonna go 1362 01:32:19.359 --> 01:32:25.920 very like nineteen forties inspired like yea, yeah, like something that like Greta 1363 01:32:26.000 --> 01:32:28.840 Garbo would have worn. Back to total way I mean, yeah, so 1364 01:32:29.039 --> 01:32:32.000 hot. Yes, I agree. I couldn't agree more. Okay, I 1365 01:32:32.079 --> 01:32:36.159 have one. There's this moment where it's after the whole health shake fiasco. 1366 01:32:36.399 --> 01:32:41.359 The health shake is not a health shake, and she apologizes and they start 1367 01:32:41.399 --> 01:32:43.800 to make up, and she does this thing where she's like, do you 1368 01:32:43.840 --> 01:32:45.600 want to scratch? Do you want scratch? And he's like, ooh, 1369 01:32:45.680 --> 01:32:50.319 scratch, and then she starts scratching his back and he's like being Mike Myers. 1370 01:32:50.920 --> 01:32:55.199 Look, I will say this, this moment is actually kind of cute 1371 01:32:55.399 --> 01:32:58.319 to me, Like it pretty much work. This feels like a couple of 1372 01:32:58.560 --> 01:33:01.760 thing completely and like him being weird in this moment worked because they were both 1373 01:33:01.840 --> 01:33:04.760 being weird and they knew it, like that was part of the actual character. 1374 01:33:05.399 --> 01:33:12.079 But he's telling her where to go by describing San Francisco neighborhoods. Yeah, 1375 01:33:12.239 --> 01:33:15.920 I like, now scratch me in like Lower east Side or whatever, 1376 01:33:15.439 --> 01:33:18.000 go to Oakland, Go to Oakland, and like then there's a joke about 1377 01:33:18.039 --> 01:33:20.479 like, oh, grab my penis, which is fine, like it's but 1378 01:33:20.600 --> 01:33:25.680 I was just like, what's happening. This went from cute weird to weird 1379 01:33:25.760 --> 01:33:30.239 weird real quick with the addition of geography. And actually, I'm so glad 1380 01:33:30.279 --> 01:33:33.479 you brought it up because the moment before this, before she decides to like 1381 01:33:34.119 --> 01:33:36.520 be like, you know what, I was wrong. That was weird of 1382 01:33:36.600 --> 01:33:40.520 me to like push the healthshake on you, which she's still angry with him. 1383 01:33:40.800 --> 01:33:43.520 He's trying to make up with her right away, and he goes, 1384 01:33:43.920 --> 01:33:46.239 I'm a human blanket. I'm a human blanket. He tries to like hug 1385 01:33:46.319 --> 01:33:50.039 her like it's one of their little playful things that they do, and she's 1386 01:33:50.079 --> 01:33:54.199 like, no, not right now, Charlie. If someone in the middle 1387 01:33:54.239 --> 01:33:56.880 of a fight turns to me and tries to hug me and goes, I'm 1388 01:33:56.920 --> 01:34:00.840 a blanket. I'm a human blanket, I would actually again throw them out 1389 01:34:00.880 --> 01:34:02.960 the fucking window, not be a good person to be in a relationship. 1390 01:34:04.119 --> 01:34:09.159 That's what we're discovering. It's learning in real time outside of my line, 1391 01:34:09.399 --> 01:34:13.800 I will throw you out the window. We have already discussed the fact that 1392 01:34:14.039 --> 01:34:16.760 my favorite person in the movie is Alan Arkin and his character. But the 1393 01:34:16.880 --> 01:34:20.720 moment it really solidified for me and I squealed out loud, was when he 1394 01:34:20.800 --> 01:34:26.359 busted in and he told Tony you stay out of this Ralph Elliott case. 1395 01:34:26.520 --> 01:34:30.520 This is strictly a matter for homocide. He said homocide. He said homocide, 1396 01:34:31.079 --> 01:34:33.680 just like in Sunset Boulevard. I squealed. I was like, Oh 1397 01:34:33.720 --> 01:34:39.479 my god, why can't anyone say homicide? What is wrong? Oh? 1398 01:34:39.600 --> 01:34:43.520 I think he's doing Sunset Boulevard. I honestly do. I think I think 1399 01:34:43.600 --> 01:34:46.159 Alan Arkin is doing He's like, let me like, what this guy did 1400 01:34:46.359 --> 01:34:49.760 was this guy went home and he watched a bunch of film noirs. Oh 1401 01:34:50.000 --> 01:34:54.279 yeah, yeah, yeah, to match the like to match the shitty cops 1402 01:34:54.319 --> 01:34:56.760 in film noirs, so he could bring it to the office. I love 1403 01:34:56.840 --> 01:35:00.079 that story. I'm in. I'm in during the occurrent affair that he's watching. 1404 01:35:00.359 --> 01:35:05.399 The lead story right before the poisoning story that he watches is about a 1405 01:35:05.520 --> 01:35:11.399 reptile taking Hollywood by storm. Whether they show a giant picture of a giant 1406 01:35:11.439 --> 01:35:15.079 lizard and it says says jing iguana be in pictures. I laughed at that. 1407 01:35:15.319 --> 01:35:18.439 I laughed hard at that. That was the energy I want. I 1408 01:35:18.600 --> 01:35:24.760 wanted in Spice World for the headlines. That's the energy that I wanna be 1409 01:35:24.840 --> 01:35:27.760 in pictures. That's it, that's it, That's what I was missing in 1410 01:35:27.840 --> 01:35:34.079 that movie. We have to discuss the bathroom at Stewart and May's house because 1411 01:35:34.119 --> 01:35:39.680 it is filthy. It is filthy to the point where it actually took me 1412 01:35:39.720 --> 01:35:42.239 out of the movie because I was like, I'm not even I'm not talking 1413 01:35:42.319 --> 01:35:45.199 cluttered. Look, some people do a full clean before people come over. 1414 01:35:45.319 --> 01:35:48.399 Some people don't. I'm not judging the fact that like there's like magazines in 1415 01:35:48.479 --> 01:35:53.039 there and whatever that are open, fine, whatever. I'm talking about the 1416 01:35:53.159 --> 01:35:57.720 sink looking like it was in like a slum in the Lower East Side in 1417 01:35:57.880 --> 01:36:01.800 nineteen ten in New York City. Never has soap touched this thing. It's 1418 01:36:01.920 --> 01:36:05.319 disgusting. I think the movie is trying to be like, these are working 1419 01:36:05.399 --> 01:36:09.560 class people, but I'm like, you're going too far, because working class 1420 01:36:09.600 --> 01:36:15.960 people still clean their fucking mass You still have soap. But did you notice 1421 01:36:16.000 --> 01:36:19.359 the dart board with the Queen of England on it? Yes? I did 1422 01:36:19.520 --> 01:36:23.600 enjoy that on the door, so that like when Stuart's on the toilet, 1423 01:36:23.720 --> 01:36:29.760 he can throw darts at the Queen. Very very Lizzie's in a box energy 1424 01:36:29.880 --> 01:36:34.439 from that from that football match in Ireland. I only have one more. 1425 01:36:34.520 --> 01:36:38.520 It's very short. It is one of my favorite lines in the movie. 1426 01:36:38.560 --> 01:36:43.640 It comes from Tony Jardino, mister Anthony LaPaglia. He calls Charlie. He 1427 01:36:43.720 --> 01:36:46.840 says, guess what someone turned themselves in for missus X. You're good to 1428 01:36:46.920 --> 01:36:49.560 go. You broke up with her for no reason. You're a dope. 1429 01:36:49.680 --> 01:36:54.119 Charlie's like, oh my god, and Tony says, crime to stop, 1430 01:36:54.199 --> 01:37:01.760 gotta go, catch you later and very very funny. I enjoyed that. 1431 01:37:01.880 --> 01:37:05.960 I really talking with you about this movie has made me enjoy it more. 1432 01:37:06.279 --> 01:37:10.680 In retrospect, I have to say I still don't like the parts I don't 1433 01:37:10.840 --> 01:37:13.800 like, but I think your enjoyment of some of those parts has increased my 1434 01:37:13.920 --> 01:37:17.319 enjoyment of them. And then the way you were saying, like him being 1435 01:37:17.359 --> 01:37:20.319 a little weird sometimes works, I'm more on board with it. I'm more 1436 01:37:20.319 --> 01:37:23.880 on board with it, so you know, I you know, I just 1437 01:37:23.960 --> 01:37:27.319 wish like he was a better actor, that's all. That's all. I'm 1438 01:37:27.359 --> 01:37:30.680 not even mad at the weird stuff. It's actually the normal stuff that I 1439 01:37:30.720 --> 01:37:32.880 don't like because I'm like, I don't believe you. He's like when he 1440 01:37:33.039 --> 01:37:35.520 turns right to her and he's like, I love you, I'm like, 1441 01:37:35.680 --> 01:37:41.680 no, no, you don't. Uh are just reading that line from a 1442 01:37:41.760 --> 01:37:45.960 que card behind her head. I just have one more. And it's one 1443 01:37:45.960 --> 01:37:48.000 of my favorite jokes in the movie that I didn't get when I was a 1444 01:37:48.079 --> 01:37:51.760 kid. It's when they're on their honeymoon and everyone like carries them up to 1445 01:37:51.800 --> 01:37:56.920 their suite in their chair and they deposit them there and then everyone leaves and 1446 01:37:57.119 --> 01:38:00.600 Charlie is terrified of being left alone with Harriet because you think she's going to 1447 01:38:00.640 --> 01:38:02.560 try to kill him, so he just the last person left is the bell 1448 01:38:02.640 --> 01:38:06.199 hop and he turns to the bell hop and he's like, hey, why 1449 01:38:06.239 --> 01:38:09.600 don't you come in and stay for a nightcap? Yeah, and the bell 1450 01:38:09.680 --> 01:38:13.880 hop is like, clearly not his first rodeo, not his first time where 1451 01:38:13.880 --> 01:38:16.960 a couple has tried to bring him into their whole thing and he's like, 1452 01:38:17.079 --> 01:38:20.800 no, sir, no, Like He's like, I had boundaries, sir. 1453 01:38:21.319 --> 01:38:25.600 And then Charlie's like, come in for a nightcap. He just freaks 1454 01:38:25.600 --> 01:38:29.239 out and runs away. He's like, ah, I have to it. 1455 01:38:29.319 --> 01:38:31.800 When that started, I was bracing for a gay thing to happen. I 1456 01:38:31.840 --> 01:38:34.279 thought there was going to be a gay slur tossed out and there wasn't, 1457 01:38:34.359 --> 01:38:38.279 which I very much appreciated. No, But I also, when I was 1458 01:38:38.319 --> 01:38:42.720 a kid, did not get the humor of like what was really what was 1459 01:38:42.760 --> 01:38:45.319 going through the bell hop's head is like the najatois of it all. The 1460 01:38:45.399 --> 01:38:49.840 response, the initial response is so unsurprised. Yeah, and I was like, 1461 01:38:50.000 --> 01:38:58.600 oh my god, he's been propositioned a hundred times, Paul, how 1462 01:38:58.760 --> 01:39:03.159 should we rank? I'm married an ex murderer. One to ten Health code 1463 01:39:03.239 --> 01:39:08.199 violations, so many health code violations. There's way more than ten in this 1464 01:39:08.319 --> 01:39:14.079 movie, way more. Do not buy anything for sushi from this woman. 1465 01:39:14.960 --> 01:39:20.319 It is absolutely not sushi grade one to ten. Poems said to you with 1466 01:39:20.560 --> 01:39:26.640 direct eye contacts, direct address right at you're talking about something really personal. 1467 01:39:26.840 --> 01:39:30.000 Someone close puts you in a room, closes the door behind them. You 1468 01:39:30.119 --> 01:39:36.960 have no escape and then they just poem at you. Oh one to ten 1469 01:39:38.119 --> 01:39:45.319 pasta related Italian slurs. Hey, yo, go get your rigatoni tubin ass 1470 01:39:45.920 --> 01:39:50.800 and take it back to Sicily. Why don't you take your auraquette ea shaped 1471 01:39:50.920 --> 01:39:56.560 ass and get back to fucking Venice. Why don't you take you linguini, 1472 01:39:57.079 --> 01:40:01.079 flatten it even more, call it papa ella, and get your fucking ass 1473 01:40:01.319 --> 01:40:06.319 back to Capri. Your buka tini doesn't even have one hole in it. 1474 01:40:06.800 --> 01:40:13.680 Okay, Oh that's out of line, mister, that's out a line. 1475 01:40:14.279 --> 01:40:20.439 Take your fall Falley bow tie and ass back to Calabria. Ah, how 1476 01:40:20.439 --> 01:40:25.800 about one to ten sexy Saturday Morning Cartoons. By the way, the line 1477 01:40:25.840 --> 01:40:30.960 in the poem in the film, I fucking love it. Girls of cartoons 1478 01:40:31.159 --> 01:40:36.479 will leave you in ruins? Excellent. No notes on that line. I 1479 01:40:36.560 --> 01:40:41.319 still think it's the ThunderCats. I've kind of been marinating on this in the 1480 01:40:41.319 --> 01:40:43.560 back of my head. I still think the ThunderCats are the sexiest ones. 1481 01:40:43.640 --> 01:40:46.840 I kind of remember g I Joe being really hot, like all the Joe's 1482 01:40:47.119 --> 01:40:53.439 all the Joe Jo's, Joe's Gojo Gojo. I had a weird like moment 1483 01:40:53.560 --> 01:40:57.439 where like Raphael from the teenage mutant Ninja Turtles. I felt bad for him. 1484 01:40:57.479 --> 01:41:00.159 I wanted to nurture him. I always thought the one in purple with 1485 01:41:00.239 --> 01:41:04.920 the bow staff was the hot one. I I don't even know it's for 1486 01:41:05.079 --> 01:41:09.520 The blue one was the leader. The red one was the wounded soldier. 1487 01:41:09.760 --> 01:41:13.199 I don't know, like he carried some internal pain in him and for some 1488 01:41:13.279 --> 01:41:15.760 reason I related to that. And then the orange one was just fucking obnoxious. 1489 01:41:15.800 --> 01:41:18.399 That was Michaelangelo. Okay, So then the purple one was probably the 1490 01:41:18.439 --> 01:41:25.399 smart one. I love a nerd and he carries a big stick. Of 1491 01:41:25.520 --> 01:41:29.680 course, though no one is sexier than John from Garfield. Well, I 1492 01:41:30.000 --> 01:41:32.680 don't think that needs to be said clearly. I you know what, I'm 1493 01:41:32.720 --> 01:41:35.640 embarrassed. I even had to say the quiet part out loud. John from 1494 01:41:35.680 --> 01:41:42.439 Garfield lace pipe like a lifelong plumber. Okay, haha. John from Garfield 1495 01:41:43.039 --> 01:41:46.039 is me deep and pussy, and I'm not talking about all those cats. 1496 01:41:46.560 --> 01:41:51.520 John from Garfield will will pound you so hard the headboard just just breaks through 1497 01:41:51.560 --> 01:41:57.079 the plaster under wall. The sheet rock will crumble. John from Garfield makes 1498 01:41:57.119 --> 01:42:01.680 his own lasagna by putting in his sheets and just pounding them flat. You 1499 01:42:01.760 --> 01:42:08.359 know what I'm saying, God have brought two together there. That's good. 1500 01:42:08.880 --> 01:42:14.680 Good. I think we should do this. One's sexy Saturday Morning cartoons ruins. 1501 01:42:15.319 --> 01:42:16.039 Do you want to go first? Or should I go first? You 1502 01:42:16.159 --> 01:42:20.880 go first? Okay? Bechdel test. I believe it fails the Bechdel test 1503 01:42:21.520 --> 01:42:25.960 because Harry and Rose talk, but I think they only talk about Charlie. 1504 01:42:26.000 --> 01:42:29.319 Actually do they even talk? They just kind of she screams her to stop 1505 01:42:29.439 --> 01:42:31.800 killing Charlie. I think that's it. Yeah, they we don't really hear 1506 01:42:31.880 --> 01:42:39.039 any of the conversation with Ralph unfortunately, and May and Harriet. They talk 1507 01:42:39.119 --> 01:42:43.079 a little bit about Harriet, but a lot about Charlie too. So ah, 1508 01:42:44.079 --> 01:42:46.119 oh, well, yes there is one, but I don't I don't 1509 01:42:46.119 --> 01:42:49.279 know if we should count it either because it's so tangential. But it's Susan 1510 01:42:49.359 --> 01:42:55.399 and Harriet talking about would you rather be electrocuted or whatever? But again, 1511 01:42:56.159 --> 01:42:59.800 it's not a two one it's not a one on one conversation. Yeah, 1512 01:43:00.159 --> 01:43:02.520 but it does have a It does have a couple plumb female roles in it, 1513 01:43:02.960 --> 01:43:06.039 and I think they're all written pretty well and they're all performed well, 1514 01:43:06.079 --> 01:43:11.079 and they're all fun everyone everyone involved got to have fun and got to do 1515 01:43:11.199 --> 01:43:14.399 it love DANCEWL Travis in the role. Right, So so that's good. 1516 01:43:14.479 --> 01:43:15.479 Like, even though it fails the Bechdel test, I would say that the 1517 01:43:15.560 --> 01:43:19.439 female representation in it is solid. Yeah, I would go with that too, 1518 01:43:19.520 --> 01:43:24.239 And also, really, Charlie and Tony also mostly talk about women. 1519 01:43:24.880 --> 01:43:28.159 Yeah, it's because that's the it's the whole rom com thing where like, 1520 01:43:28.279 --> 01:43:31.680 no one has an interior life outside of right, the romantic situation they're in. 1521 01:43:32.279 --> 01:43:38.720 The only really like non romance conversations that we hear are between like Tony 1522 01:43:38.920 --> 01:43:42.960 and Stuart and Tony and the Captain. Well, Tony and the Captain that 1523 01:43:43.159 --> 01:43:45.079 is romantic. I don't know. I don't know what movie you watched. 1524 01:43:45.640 --> 01:43:49.880 I am deeply in love with both of them. Yes, exactly. This 1525 01:43:50.239 --> 01:43:55.399 is a white ass movie. You can tell they really filmed in San Francisco 1526 01:43:55.399 --> 01:43:58.560 though, because there's a lot of Asian extras and there's a couple of black 1527 01:43:58.640 --> 01:44:01.920 extras. But that's it. I don't know that a person of color speaks 1528 01:44:02.319 --> 01:44:06.840 in it. Lunel Oh, that's right, So that's not great. We 1529 01:44:08.039 --> 01:44:12.560 love a little more diversity, and there's not really any gay content. There's 1530 01:44:12.640 --> 01:44:15.680 the low level gay slur from Stewart in the beginning. I think that's pretty 1531 01:44:15.760 --> 01:44:19.000 much it, which for a San Francisco movie is a little rude. Okay, 1532 01:44:19.079 --> 01:44:23.279 that's a little bit rude. I'm just gonna say that. I think, 1533 01:44:23.479 --> 01:44:26.000 like, like we often said, most of these are sins of omission. 1534 01:44:26.039 --> 01:44:29.720 They're not sins of offense. It's not that nothing in it is really 1535 01:44:30.199 --> 01:44:31.720 giving offense. It's just like, wow, this is super white, and 1536 01:44:32.600 --> 01:44:34.920 there would be gay people in San Francisco and all that stuff. So I 1537 01:44:34.960 --> 01:44:39.800 don't think it ages horribly. I think if you're watching it as an adult, 1538 01:44:40.840 --> 01:44:45.920 the Mike Meyer stuff may not hit as well as it as it would 1539 01:44:45.079 --> 01:44:47.920 for you when you were a kid. And if you watch it as a 1540 01:44:48.000 --> 01:44:51.319 kid, you probably still hits beautifully, and that's totally fine. Didn't really 1541 01:44:51.399 --> 01:44:56.079 hit for me, but that's just me. So I'm gonna pitch it down 1542 01:44:56.079 --> 01:45:00.319 the middle. I'm gonna say five out of ten sexy Saturday car tunes that 1543 01:45:00.479 --> 01:45:04.239 leave you in ruins, Yeah, I mean, it's not a fense. 1544 01:45:04.279 --> 01:45:06.520 Maybe I'll give no, you know, I'll say six. It's not offensive. 1545 01:45:06.640 --> 01:45:10.960 It's just there's just no missions. Someone's I'm giving a six six out 1546 01:45:11.000 --> 01:45:14.319 of ten sex sexy Saturday cartoons. How about you? I would say six 1547 01:45:14.359 --> 01:45:16.560 as well. I don't love that there's no diversity. It's already nineteen ninety 1548 01:45:16.600 --> 01:45:20.119 three, like, come the fuck on, yeah, and it's San Francisco 1549 01:45:20.199 --> 01:45:25.199 for goodness sake. It does have beat poet representation, which is important, 1550 01:45:25.279 --> 01:45:29.960 sure, very important. It's important for those lovely little freaks to be seen 1551 01:45:30.760 --> 01:45:34.920 and heard, to feel seen and heard, because otherwise they'll do poetry at 1552 01:45:35.000 --> 01:45:38.199 me, and I don't want that. No one does, no, no, 1553 01:45:38.399 --> 01:45:42.479 frankly, no one does. It is such a nice skewering of nineties 1554 01:45:42.560 --> 01:45:45.960 culture, though I do love that it is. It is really funny, 1555 01:45:45.079 --> 01:45:49.079 like they take all these like silly little nuances from the nineties and like really 1556 01:45:49.199 --> 01:45:55.199 amp them up. I do like the Harriet May and even Rose to some 1557 01:45:55.359 --> 01:45:58.800 extent. They have to for obvious reasons. They have to kind of background 1558 01:45:58.920 --> 01:46:00.359 Rose a little bit in the movie. Yeah, it's bad enough. They 1559 01:46:00.399 --> 01:46:04.920 cast Amanda Plumber so you're like, well, that's the killer, but they 1560 01:46:04.960 --> 01:46:10.239 can't like overdo it with her quirkiness, otherwise she will like really come across 1561 01:46:10.279 --> 01:46:14.119 as like well, she's very obviously the killer as far as a murder mystery 1562 01:46:14.199 --> 01:46:15.520 goes. We didn't really talk about that because that is a theme for this 1563 01:46:15.720 --> 01:46:19.159 month, is was this a mystery? Did you feel it all surprised when 1564 01:46:19.239 --> 01:46:24.800 Rose was the killer? I will say that because they cast Nancy Travis in 1565 01:46:24.960 --> 01:46:29.039 a Magic Plumber, I tricked myself. I was like, Okay, it 1566 01:46:29.159 --> 01:46:31.560 is actually going to be Nancy Travis's the that's the sleight of hand, right, 1567 01:46:31.720 --> 01:46:35.800 Everyone just presumes it's her weird ass sister played by Amanda Plumber. And 1568 01:46:35.920 --> 01:46:40.760 I had almost convinced myself when they got to Poet's Corner that she was actually 1569 01:46:40.760 --> 01:46:43.760 gonna wind up being the killer. And then I actually read that in the 1570 01:46:43.800 --> 01:46:46.039 original ending of the script she is Oh, it is her, and the 1571 01:46:46.239 --> 01:46:49.520 original ending of the movie is him. He stays married to her, and 1572 01:46:49.560 --> 01:46:51.720 he goes to visit her in prison all the time and like brings her cakes. 1573 01:46:51.760 --> 01:46:55.840 It's a it's a some like a hot ending of No One's perfect. 1574 01:46:56.159 --> 01:46:58.880 Oh that's cute. I love that, which is cute, and it it 1575 01:46:59.000 --> 01:47:02.640 actually makes more sense with the movie because you're like, how dumb is Harriet? 1576 01:47:04.119 --> 01:47:08.880 That is law enforcement? How little do any of these other men matter? 1577 01:47:09.159 --> 01:47:12.880 That literally, no one cares that they've disappeared. They went missing, 1578 01:47:12.920 --> 01:47:15.720 but they might have moved. And I'm tired. I don't feel like the 1579 01:47:16.600 --> 01:47:21.000 same woman married all three of them, So what right? Yeah, so 1580 01:47:21.520 --> 01:47:26.479 my external knowledge me trying to kind of outsmart the movie led me back to 1581 01:47:26.600 --> 01:47:30.159 no, I think it actually is Harriet. But yeah, it's not much 1582 01:47:30.159 --> 01:47:31.720 of a mystery. There's really only two suspects. It has to be one 1583 01:47:31.760 --> 01:47:34.479 of them. Would have been great if it was Debbie Mazar. Yes, 1584 01:47:34.920 --> 01:47:39.319 just coming out of nowhere, coming in hot and she's a killer, she's 1585 01:47:39.399 --> 01:47:42.439 Madam X and she has her sight set on Tony. That would have been 1586 01:47:42.439 --> 01:47:45.520 a good twist. Yeah. I have to say, as far as murder 1587 01:47:45.640 --> 01:47:48.800 mysteries go, this is not a good one. I actually love that that 1588 01:47:48.920 --> 01:47:53.239 original ending. I really wish they'd kept that. That would have been fantastic. 1589 01:47:53.520 --> 01:47:56.279 So yeah, as far as murder mystery goes, not that great. 1590 01:47:56.439 --> 01:48:01.680 As far as representation goes, not that great. Interesting female characters, not 1591 01:48:01.880 --> 01:48:04.800 super one note, as one note, as basically anyone is in this movie. 1592 01:48:05.439 --> 01:48:08.960 I'm gonna give it a six. Along with you, I think I 1593 01:48:09.079 --> 01:48:11.319 think there's a lot of sins of a mission. There's a lot. It's 1594 01:48:11.359 --> 01:48:14.239 like it bums me out that there's no diversity in any of these movies. 1595 01:48:14.319 --> 01:48:16.720 I'm like, I guess even the SNL cast wasn't that diverse, but I 1596 01:48:16.760 --> 01:48:19.439 don't know if Tim Meadows or even had joined the cast yet. I'm like, 1597 01:48:19.479 --> 01:48:25.359 can't you just get like Garrett Morris or someone come on from the SNL 1598 01:48:25.680 --> 01:48:29.119 universe in this movie? For God's sake? Yeah? I do you want 1599 01:48:29.119 --> 01:48:31.359 to offer a palate cleanser? Weirdly know though, because I do love this 1600 01:48:31.520 --> 01:48:34.560 movie and I think it's very funny, and like, we've been very hard 1601 01:48:34.600 --> 01:48:40.600 on Mike Myers. He has acted in like straight films, right, non 1602 01:48:40.720 --> 01:48:45.319 comedies for years, and he's he's okay in them, but he's just not 1603 01:48:45.520 --> 01:48:47.560 He's just not good enough for me to anchor a rom com. Like they 1604 01:48:47.760 --> 01:48:51.720 really needed someone with like who who's funny but can also act like a Billy 1605 01:48:51.800 --> 01:48:59.039 Crystals. Yes, too bad. Tom Hanks is like out doing AIDS dramas 1606 01:48:59.079 --> 01:49:02.199 at this point, like winning Oscars, Yeah, but like, yeah, 1607 01:49:02.279 --> 01:49:06.119 someone with that kind of level of like deftness and acting but also funny. 1608 01:49:06.359 --> 01:49:10.279 How about you? Are you not offer any polo cleansers? I was just 1609 01:49:10.319 --> 01:49:14.000 thinking about Mike Haggerty, who was in that brief scene in the newspaper room, 1610 01:49:14.039 --> 01:49:17.039 and he's in that show Somebody Somewhere that's on HBO. There's two seasons 1611 01:49:17.079 --> 01:49:19.840 on HBO right now, and I just really love that show. It's very 1612 01:49:20.760 --> 01:49:25.640 warm and inviting and if you're in need of something soothing, it's a good 1613 01:49:25.680 --> 01:49:30.319 option to soothe. I feel like many people need soothing these days. He 1614 01:49:30.800 --> 01:49:34.520 did pass away in between the first season and the second season, Mike Haggerty 1615 01:49:34.600 --> 01:49:39.479 did. And what they did on the show is they didn't have his character 1616 01:49:39.600 --> 01:49:42.199 die. They had his character like join one of his friends, and he 1617 01:49:42.279 --> 01:49:44.239 lives on a boat with one of his friends. He's having a great time. 1618 01:49:44.279 --> 01:49:46.920 And I liked that part of the show that they were like because it's 1619 01:49:46.920 --> 01:49:49.600 already a little bit a show, quite a bit about grief, so they're 1620 01:49:49.640 --> 01:49:53.720 like, we don't need to pile on the fact that in real life this 1621 01:49:53.920 --> 01:49:57.479 man passed away on top of this, and they just gave the character a 1622 01:49:57.520 --> 01:50:00.479 happy ending. And I kind of like it when they do that, and 1623 01:50:00.479 --> 01:50:03.119 when they're like, Okay, this person unexpectedly died and does it totally make 1624 01:50:03.199 --> 01:50:06.680 story sense. No, But I don't care because it gives me a little 1625 01:50:06.720 --> 01:50:10.760 warm, little hug inside when I think about it. So somebody somewhere on 1626 01:50:10.880 --> 01:50:14.319 HBOS excellent, can I say, I'm watching all creatures great and small, 1627 01:50:14.439 --> 01:50:16.720 which I love. And they cast Dame Diana Rigg in the first season, 1628 01:50:16.720 --> 01:50:20.560 who played this ooh, very small character but like kind of important to this 1629 01:50:20.720 --> 01:50:25.479 story, like she's she's she's gonna show up in every season at some point, 1630 01:50:25.920 --> 01:50:28.600 and then of course she passes away because that's what happens when you cast 1631 01:50:28.640 --> 01:50:32.479 a ninety year old person in a roll. And so they they didn't do 1632 01:50:32.600 --> 01:50:38.319 any like they can't unwrite the character, like she's so into the fabric of 1633 01:50:38.359 --> 01:50:42.399 the show. So they just recast it with another woman who's like clearly in 1634 01:50:42.479 --> 01:50:44.880 her sixties. Like they're like, okay, we're just gonna cast a wood 1635 01:50:45.039 --> 01:50:50.000 not doing this again, way way younger his latest And to this day it's 1636 01:50:50.079 --> 01:50:54.159 so goddamn weird. Every time she shows up. She's lovely, she does 1637 01:50:54.199 --> 01:50:56.560 a great job, but I'm like, she got she got a little refreshed. 1638 01:50:57.199 --> 01:51:00.279 I'm like, you're not Dame Diana rig though. By the way, 1639 01:51:00.439 --> 01:51:05.840 rip Cheetah. We lost Cheetah this week. Who's Cheetah Cheeta Rivera. Oh 1640 01:51:05.920 --> 01:51:09.640 my god, I still had ThunderCats in my head and I thought that what 1641 01:51:09.720 --> 01:51:13.520 we were talking about, and I was like, wait, wait, are 1642 01:51:13.600 --> 01:51:17.640 we making us sundercats joke again? I am not on board? All right. 1643 01:51:17.760 --> 01:51:20.840 That is the end of our show. Everyone listening can follow us on 1644 01:51:20.920 --> 01:51:25.199 social media on Instagram, on Twitter, on threads. We have a tea 1645 01:51:25.359 --> 01:51:28.920 public shop you can go. You can pick up podcast swag if you're a 1646 01:51:28.960 --> 01:51:31.600 Spotify user. We ask questions, We do polls on the episodes, and 1647 01:51:31.680 --> 01:51:35.119 we would love it if you'd leave a five star review on Apple Podcast or 1648 01:51:35.159 --> 01:51:40.119 any other podcasting platform that you use. You do that, just like film 1649 01:51:40.199 --> 01:51:43.439 Lover did the top of this episode. You let us know and we send 1650 01:51:43.479 --> 01:51:45.880 you a that Edgewel topeg and that is how it works here. That Age 1651 01:51:45.920 --> 01:51:57.239 Well is produced and edited by Paul Kola, producer editor, an Elbow Bending 1652 01:51:57.399 --> 01:52:10.359 pasta Italian Ah Homosex Wall. We would like to thank Jenny, Lana carry 1653 01:52:10.439 --> 01:52:14.760 Anne, Marie Elene which is a fucking great name by the way, Kelly 1654 01:52:15.000 --> 01:52:17.039 and Aaron for reaching out and letting us know what they want to hear. 1655 01:52:17.600 --> 01:52:20.000 If you want to have a say in the topics, we discuss. Just 1656 01:52:20.079 --> 01:52:23.960 write us a beat poem, lock us in a room and say it directly 1657 01:52:24.000 --> 01:52:29.399 to our faces because we love that. We love that, or alternately, 1658 01:52:29.880 --> 01:52:33.359 join our Patreon. Every patroon gets to vote in an exclusive monthly poll to 1659 01:52:33.439 --> 01:52:36.520 determine one of our subjects. So you can head on over to patreon dot 1660 01:52:36.600 --> 01:52:42.800 com flashed that age Well podcast to find out more. And speaking of that, 1661 01:52:43.479 --> 01:52:45.600 some tears in our Patreon come with a thanks for a podcast character. 1662 01:52:45.840 --> 01:52:49.760 All tears in our Patreon come with ad free episodes, right, but some 1663 01:52:50.079 --> 01:52:54.800 come with thanks for a podcast character. And today we are hearing from that 1664 01:52:55.079 --> 01:53:00.720 lusty, lickored up lady, Miss Catherine Hepburn. Hello cats and kittens, 1665 01:53:01.439 --> 01:53:08.399 it's your friend, Catherine Heaven Again. I'm in a fantastic mood today, 1666 01:53:08.399 --> 01:53:12.760 and can I tell you why. It's because I heard from my good friend 1667 01:53:13.000 --> 01:53:17.880 Vanessa to Vanilly. Vanessa is a listener of that Age Dwell and her last 1668 01:53:18.000 --> 01:53:25.800 name is apparently some sort of portmanteau of her and her partner's name, Spencer 1669 01:53:25.880 --> 01:53:30.119 and I tried that once, but all we could come up with was hepatitis. 1670 01:53:30.840 --> 01:53:34.199 The name to Vanilli reminds me of a conole and of course, I 1671 01:53:34.359 --> 01:53:40.439 had the most delicious connole once on the set of The Thin Man. A 1672 01:53:40.560 --> 01:53:43.960 connole, of course, is not a pastry, but a sex act in 1673 01:53:44.079 --> 01:53:48.119 which a man ejaculates into a Chinese finger trap and then two women play with 1674 01:53:48.239 --> 01:53:56.039 it. Myrna and William and I had such fun that day, just drinking 1675 01:53:56.359 --> 01:54:00.560 slippery nipples, which are the most disgusting cocktails. Well, the dog watched 1676 01:54:00.640 --> 01:54:06.000 the entire time. Thank you, Vanessa for listening to that, agedd well. 1677 01:54:06.520 --> 01:54:11.000 Spencer and I are going to have a delightful day on the deck just 1678 01:54:11.199 --> 01:54:16.640 playing with our Chinese finger trap and drinking slippery nipples, wishing to God one 1679 01:54:16.680 --> 01:54:23.479 of us had thought to give us safe word to William Powell, Wow, 1680 01:54:23.960 --> 01:54:28.319 her exploits are becoming more and more graphic. I feel like maybe there isn't 1681 01:54:28.319 --> 01:54:30.800 any part of Hollywood she hasn't touched in a way that was non consensual. 1682 01:54:31.399 --> 01:54:34.439 Yeah, yeah, I mean, Mira and Alloy and William Power are in 1683 01:54:34.520 --> 01:54:39.560 The Thin Man, but it sounds like Mirorn Alloy and Catherine Hepburn were both 1684 01:54:39.600 --> 01:54:42.880 in The Thin Man at the same time. Yeah, I'm picking up what 1685 01:54:42.960 --> 01:54:45.159 you're putting down, Paul, And yeah, you're right, they were Yeah, 1686 01:54:45.199 --> 01:54:47.199 they were definitely both in The Thin Man. Yeah, so, Eric, 1687 01:54:47.279 --> 01:54:50.039 I you have any final thoughts on so I married an axe murderer. 1688 01:54:50.279 --> 01:54:54.239 You know what I really want is a remake of this movie with Sarah Sherman 1689 01:54:54.319 --> 01:54:57.960 from SNL from Current SNL in the Charlie role. You know what? Yes, 1690 01:54:58.279 --> 01:55:11.000 perfect, no doubts, fuzzy navel, Harvey wallbanger between the sheets, 1691 01:55:12.039 --> 01:55:15.680 hanky panky duck, fart, horses neck hell, sorry, really quick, 1692 01:55:15.800 --> 01:55:26.720 don't google rusty nipple. You have to be very specific. You cannot just 1693 01:55:26.960 --> 01:55:32.640 google rusty nipple and expect Google to understand what you're looking for. The thing 1694 01:55:32.800 --> 01:55:36.159 is the other option for so upsetting. You think it'd be like a fun 1695 01:55:36.279 --> 01:55:40.199 sex thing. No it's not. It's all medical, and it was all 1696 01:55:40.279 --> 01:55:41.359 incredibly upsetting.