Good Monday morning. It's the Saint Patrick's Day post Game Show or the Downbeat.
I'm Kevin Turner, Dadi Bayless, Mike's Roy JJ Jackson and we got
a lot of cramp Man. Yesterday we had about a five minute sports roller
coaster that was some of the best crap I've experienced in months. Dear God,
Kyrie, Dear called window Clark so much there, Guys at seven point
thirty, can you name the top fifteen places to get hit by a car
in Dallas. We'll find out you have a list of that whole dangerous crossings.
Yes, I would say keep your thoughts and get ready for I was
gonna say number one. Number one should be the head. Yeah, oh
no, no, I'll take leg leg you get leg a lot up yeah,
quad orse side of thunder thigh hip hip would be up there, yeah,
hip foot foot because you jump, car hits you. No, you
get your foot rolled over. That counts a hit, I hink counts as
a clear hit. I'll take football. I'll take a leg on foot.
It's rarely hand and the eye. Then I said, nobody's ever said that
got hit. I got hit in the eye with a car. Hit my
car where freaking eye. It's so weird. How could that happen? Just
maybe the intent whipping antenna, maybe a rear view mirror out, but just
the eye, my eye. That's smart. You had to be at the
place you ever been in? Well that's a hit by car. Yeah,
that's a bear trap of a conversation. But I was going to say,
been in a car that hit somebody. No, I've been in a taxi
cab in Vegas kind of bonk somebody real good did not run over them,
thankfully, But it was real dark and wearing a shady bar of it was
Vegas, and I was shotgun. I had like four people in the back
and they were all yelling and screaming, naking out with each other. Oh
god, they killed him and I was shotgun and we're It was like a
stop of a red and then make a right kind of thing, like I
stopped me. He was so I don't assume he was so stop and then
started going right. And it was a pedestrian. It was very dark.
I'll give the guy credit, and he didn't see him all. I go,
well wa wow, I yelled just stop and he kind of like simultaneously
hit the brakes. And just thunked somebody. Dounk. I mean probably five
miles per hour, you know, but the person went flying right. Well,
we definitely underestimate that how fast you're going when you're going twenty Yeah,
Well, Danny's addicted to AI reenactments of a double decker British buses going two
seventy five and running into Parliament. That shows you the clear outcome of that,
though, that's insane. One of those this weekend. It was a
bus going three hundred. It's crazy, Like, I don't have anything better
to do with my time. Then watch AI assumed renditions of normal vehicles traveling
at three hundred miles an hour into a fixed You can have a wall the
most disinterested bailists and just start the video with five miles per hour. Yeah,
and just show a bus just kind of tap on the wall and you're
like, what's next, Yeah, crank it up. I remember the first
time I saw one of those, I was I was kind of duped.
Oh me too. Oh wait. I knew that they weren't real, but
I thought it was like an actual study that was being done, but it
wasn't. It was some kid with a with a computer. How are They
like, Man, I'm never I'm never buying that new Ford Bronco. Oh
the crumples wolf It crumples at two point fifty Like I thought it was on
some test track where they have that underground ripper thing. It was only five
miles an hour, maybe less, and the dude went flying and then we
stop everyone in the car and I like, whoa, you know. The
driver, to his credit, freaked out like, oh my god, no,
you know, and got out of the car and I think I got
out of the car too, and the dude kind of he got up and
brushed himself off, but he was kind of stretching, and they talked for
a minute, and they settled out of court for us to give the guy
a ride wherever he wanted to go. So now he packed in as the
fifth person in the back seat, and he said, take me to New
York. Take yeah. And it was super weird because then we diverted to
wherever he wanted to go, which was not a glamorous casino, you know.
He went to some home address and like the party vibe in the car
kind of quelled a little bit, went some other shady neighborhood, dropped him
off it was all right. Was this like a normal man or was some
like a street person? Terrible two options you've given. It was both a
normal man and someone who may have lived on the streets of Las Vegas.
Okay. And then he got out of the car and we were like,
what the that was crazy? He said on the rest of the night,
and then he drove the Shreeport and well, that's even happened, And then
you remember it a few days later. Yeah. Have you guys ever been
involved in the bar conversation with buddies and it's around midnight or one am and
somebody gets the bright idea, you know, the bar is about to close
in an hour. We can beat a shreeport. I can get us there
in like two and a half. And you actually do it? Uh no,
one time, you actually did do it one time. Yes, he
told me. This was this off the air. It was on the air,
was okay, Oh yeah, yeah, And it didn't work out great.
It's too far to maintain maintain your party fun. Once you start seeing
the East Texas Pines and you realize you're barely even halfway there. Yeah,
and that's that's when the adrenaline rush of we're doing it, man wears off.
The northern part of Texas is very strange because it's very clear that yours.
There's a western portion you'll know when you hit it, there's the city
area you'll know when you hit it, and then there's the East Texas part
and you're always in it. Then that ride is just not like it is
going to Choctaw or Windstar. Greal lucky we have that, But go let's
go to Shreveport. Now that's a viable option, the the chalk Taw,
and it's an easy option. It's an hour. It's one of my I
don't have any plans today. You'll get on up there. But Shreatport.
That was when that was our only option. Man, I can't tell you
that. The sounds like such a great idea, and then the adrenaline buzz
of we're going to Shreveport wears off and you're not even halfway there, and
then you're at the the point of I mean, I guess we just keep
going, you know, or do we turn around and go back. Either
way you're going to be miserable. Yeah, but yeah, it's happened one
time. Getting there's always a lot more exciting than coming back. There's always
the voice of reason in those conversations that kind of talks the ring leader out
of it. It didn't happen that night. It did not happen that night.
And I think I lost my ass too, that did did Man?
Look, I woke up sleeping next to a buddy of mine in a bed
with two queen size beds, or a room with two queen size beds,
and found ATM receipts in my pocket on the way back to Dallas of I
think one hundred dollars plus a twenty dollars service fee each. I think I
was up like a grand too, and I lost it all with blackjack in
a matter of about fifteen minutes. I'm gonna win it back. You get
to study under Kevin Turner. Yeah. What you want to do there is
take one hundred dollars of Mike Rinder's money and start there, and then if
you need to dive into your own account, yeah, do so. But
if not. I like how Kevin did win a thousand bucks fine blackjack and
a little piece in his head. He's like, man, I could probably
do this for a living. Yeah, like a little pieces to be like,
Yeah, I mean, this is the start of my bank roll,
right, and he's like, I was smart. You know, you win
one hundred and then you put that in this left pocket. This will be
my strategy. Oh well, how novel. I texted Mike yesterday. I
was on a swinging pendulum from getting about seventy five dollars to five thousand dollars
on DraftKings and oh it's down to two point fifty okay, back up to
like a thousand. Yeah. When he was in one thousands, he was
texting a lot shot by shot updates. Then once Matt Fitzpatrick fell off the
leader board, he stopped communicating with me. It blocked you. It's funny
the loser never let's everyone know about their bets. But as when he wins
a big parlat let you know, you know, wow, he's a real
winner. Bruno Mars hasn't been telling people about his debts. More of that
at eight maybe all right, I'll be here at eight. All right,
we have an announcement at eight too, we do. So now we're gonna
tell people something at eight. That's it. It's about a film, about
a film. I'm going to tell you. I wanted to tell you,
guys. I learned something. Over the weekend, My almost three year old
son, Malcolm has been trolling us. What does this mean. It means
that we were watching something on TV and it was he likes. And I
know a lot of people with little kids have this thing where on YouTube you
can watch other kids play with toys. Okay, okay, okay, yeah,
I'm always confused by this life. But yeah, yeah, there's this
one kid named Ryan. I think he's really popular. Little kids like watching
Ryan open boxes of toys and play with him on boxings. Yeah, yeah,
yeah, it's Look, it's no different than what your brother does for
adults, you know, with the uh Spectra NFL car. Ye. But
there was something that had to do with Donkey Kong. Yeah, and it
had Mario on the front and the kids opening up this Donkey Kong and Malcolm
looks at me and he goes, he goes, I know it's I know
it's Mario, but we call him Keviow. He knows. He's known the
whole time. So anytime he sees Mario, he knows it's Mario. He
knows it's Mario. Wait till he meets a real Cavio at his birthday party.
Well, it's because of when we went to the Astros Rangers game game
seven and the Alcs and Kevin dressed up as Super Mario with a full mustache
and everything, and I'm sending videos back home. It's like, you know,
look where we are, and there's Kevio and he's up there with the
fans. It's a caveo doesn't make much sense. And a lot of people
were excited to see Mario there him. They were even though the back of
his his outfit was on ziped like Emma Sounds was. At the Oscars Game
seven Alcs the Mules clear headlighting act was the baseball being played but not far
off with the spaceman in the outfield and and Kevo, Yeah, people were
stopping you. It was crazy. So yeah, he loves the concept of
Kevio. He knows that Kevio is somebody that I work with, and he's
seen videos and pictures of him, and he knows who you are, Kevin,
but he calls you Kevio anytime he sees a dude with that kind of
Mario e mustache, like the the mascot at Pizza in has one, and
he calls him Kevio. But he told me He's like, I know it's
I know it's Mario, but we call him Cavio. He's known the whole
time because he's heard idiots like Ryan going Mario's gonna get attacked by Donkey Kong.
Now here's how I want to play with it. Now. I don't
know what they do. I don't mean to call the kid an idiot.
He's probably really smart and has way to make four million dollars a month.
Yeah, dude, his parents are set that Ryan kid. Why don't we
put Malcolm on YouTube? Seriously? Start his channel? Sell your kid,
man. I've never even posted a photo of him online. I'm not going
to start a YouTube channel. Why he could be a little millionaire. Okay,
Malcolm the little millionaire. You know what, I'll let him make his
millions on his own. Decide what he should be golfer, f one racer
or popular online streams. To me, like someone's itching to have his own
kid. I just want to have some one I can manipulate. Is that
I have to listen to me. That's why I'm here. Think about it.
Then you don't have to make potato songs anymore. Speaking of Witch,
nothing brought Malcolm more joy than the potato song. Yes, a father mouthing
out rustic, he goes and he not only he wants, he goes,
I want to hear the Robot one. So the Robot one is the track
that I created with a vocoder kind of backing up, you know. And
then so Ashley are wonderful social media expert, the sweet lady that comes out
and films are remotes and posts of stuff. She's just so good. She
created a little video for one of the Saint Patrick's Day songs that we did
last week, and one of them was basically, here, these are the
ways you can serve potatoes. And all I did is just googled ways that
you can serve potatoes, said the words and then singing a chorus and now
it's this and he's just Malcolm wants to hear the robot version. He wants
to hear the daddy version. And that's all he listened to all weekend or
all yesterday about that and serve your brain. Well, no, not at
all. He's just in the back seat going steamed. Yes, this song
format is so genius. This rusted there's like something in your body that wants
to like song mashed songs that do this with the build payoff French fried fo
yeah, faked keeps going up. Yes, it's all grotten boiled. You
need to remixes, different foods, steam, different sex, physicians, tots.
I made one yesterday different. These are the ways different world War planeto.
I did it with mosquitos yesterday, hand the shoe. These are the
ways you can swap mosquitoes. Are the ways you can swap mosquitos, fly
swatter. Okay, is it mosquito season, like right now? Yeah,
this is one for a walk. It's just hot. Let's do this mosquito.
These are the ways you can see mosquito. It every week, all
right until we kill people. Okay. The simplicity of it is what's just
so absurd. Yeah, well yeah, it's like the dude's just saying words
like one word shoe and with the kind of las fair delivery like I don't
care. So that AI video with your face showing no eye emotion just made
it so much funnier. No key dead shark eyes. Yes, no no
eye emotion. Boy, that spent a few hours stuck in my brain.
Pan. I'm sure we all had it. It wasn't just that song.
All of these songs, but specifically, I'm telling you I had to.
I had to put on headphones to clean my rol palette Friday night because on
repeat on a loop was the g D Kathy Ireland song Dude serious all night.
I couldn't escape it. I laid my head down on the pillow and
it's just like crank a little rop to cut the Ireland, drink a little
rough to cut the Ireland. I take it a little make air send dude
with instruments, and then my brain just going insane thinking what can I do
with this? And I had to just make it go away, so I
you know, I had them where I got I put on like amnesiac.
Yeah, mirror the brain of any evidence of Saint Patti's day songs. I'm
don the mail box prab the latest Ports Illustrated swimsuit is she was nineteen eighty
nine and have got an hour something. I must just crak a little rod
to cat the IRELM crank a little ron Akathy ARLM crank a little rod to
akadey Ireland. All McPherson too. The highlight of last week's broadcasting week.
I disagree it never stopped, although for some reason that one did. I
think it's because we went to the damn parade. Oh my god, and
you hear just that thing, and I play even in my damn c a
thieves game. It was a pirate game. There's someone there's that music and
it's it's I don't even know what the hell that is, slightly out of
tune fiddle Celtic music. Yes, so it's just fits common Irish song.
Yeah, I just heard it places. It was on our float at the
parade, non stop, just the instrumental version where it's going, okay,
I guess we got to sing no NonStop and then drinking, and then it
was so weird. You know how I cleansed the Kathy Island out of my
head was by replacing it with if you pinch me, You're gonna catch these
hands. So yesterday evening that's how my we could end. It was just
that I'm gonna catch these hands, and just I wish everyone could see emotional
Cavio cranking it up, yelling, looking hard. I try to live life
with few regrets. The list is short, but one of them is not
filming Kevin when he performed yeah catch these hands, because it was otherworldly.
Oh no, I didn't wear green. If you paint me, you catch
these hands. If you pach me, you catch these hands, you first
believe I ain't playing at all. If you peach me, you'll catch these
hands. I'm not the violent individual wolf. But if you peach me,
you catch these hands, it's time to grow up your little goots. But
you peach me, you'll catch these hands. A believe I was less intimidating.
They have a little voice, and km XMX is gonna pinch him.
God almighty, beautiful, stupid, beautiful work. Yeah, they're taking a
break, all right, folks, you get some more July. Why is
it costing us money to do this significant amount of money? More importantly,
it's costing his time and sanity because they stick. They ruin your weekends.
It's fun and fine, maybe people laugh. Maybe do them on Monday,
so by the time the weekend they're not stuck on a loop in your head.
We are ruining our own weekends. There's a couple of people out the
parade yelling out lyrics that one lady was yelling out lyrics. One guy had
written nineties of one the Freak on his chest. One guy ripped his shirt
off right when he went by one the freak written on his holy nipples from
hell just in body. That was funny. It was fun I saw a
video of you, and we're maybe talking a little bit more about this.
I want to hear, like what the scene was, like, how many
people who you thought were there all that. I saw a video of Mike's
aroyd delivering beads to little children and great, you know, you are a
man of the people and the children. But one thing I noticed is like,
you look slim, dude. Yeah, thank you, Mikey. That's
Mikey. That's amazing. Looked really good. It could have been the angle
the camera maybe, you know, the portrait mode versus landscape. I don't
know it. It may have been an optical illusion. Probably was. But
in that moment, Mike looked very sveltude, a nice, nice, slim,
slimming golf pants on a nice piece. And then I realized it was
Christina and a Travis Matthews my clothes, and that's why he looks so slim.
Whatever you're doing, it's working, not eating too much. One you
have to fill your body. It is though mental how much you just consume
and I don't. I just don't eat myself to being packed full, which
I did for most of my life, because you feel terrible. I know
for a fact, if I eat about half of what I would always eat,
You're You're fine. You're fine, You're just as full. Plus when
Christina and I split food a lot. Now, just what the shared plates?
You guys having shared plates and the waiter looks at you like, okay,
you're going to be drinking drinking it tab on tray and tea plates.
These are what we call charitables. Just that for play and just to drink
up. Just water with lemons. Fine, when the shared plate we're gonna
share, Yes, sorry, I got I got it. I understand.
That's what sharing water with my girlfriend. We're sharing only water with lemon.
For rob Low. If you want to stay as in shape as the host
of the hit game show of the Floor, just water with lemon. It's
changed my life since I went and saw the The Good Doctor. Yeah,
yeah, because I told him I have been having trouble sleeping. It's like,
what's your caffeine intake? Like, dude, I have one cup of
coffee in the morning, and I was like, oh, plus the gallon
of unsweetened iced tea that I drink the rest of the day, never even
considered it. It's like there's probably more caffeine and that iced tea you're drinking
than that that coffee per cup. Bro I cut it out. I buy
bags of lemons and it's nothing but lemon water all day long. And I
found out that I'm drinking more water and I'm sleeping. I'm falling asleep faster,
which before I'd toil around for an hour sometimes, And I think you
need to have a at least eight hour caffeine buffer before bedtime, Like it's
longer than it's a long time. Yeah, Like I'll do one cup of
coffee right right now, and then either one more coffee or selsie is at
like eight am at the latest, and then I'm good. I don't drink
any caffeine. Guzzling a Dicky's yellow tumbler of iced tea before bed and that's
like a quart unsweet iced tea. Unsweet iced tea is so right before bed.
Yeah, that's caffeine a lot, and I'm wondering why I can't sleep
or tea. I didn't know unsweet tea added caffeine in it though A bunch
can you get caffeine free tea? You can? Well no, yeah,
no you can. You can get the caffeine of tea. Mixed results on
that, but yeah, I think the and not eating late is a big
one too, Like I'd try to have my last meal of the day no
later than seven. So when you think about it, the banana doesn't hit
until seven point thirty the next day or sometimes eight, So that's like twelve
hours, twelve and a half hours, sometimes thirteen hours of I guess what
do they call intermittent faster? You're intermittent fasting by accident. Cool, Well,
you learned a lot. We don't want a lot. What a big
first segment. Good job, guys. I was weekend crap. More weekend
crap though, because it was I think one of the weirdest Saint Patrick's Day
parades we've ever had in our city's history. And I've experienced all of them,
No I haven't. I've owned some kyrie stuff later and a lot of
good stuff, all right, So that's next. A nice ev one in the free