We yelling hate, pigment, light and ship, realism, surrealism, impressionism,
end those stories, an interest in the odd, quall ap preluntion towards
the bisire. And this place is nothing if it isn't a bizarre There's no
admission, no requirement of membership, only a strong and applighting belief in the
dark at the top of the stairs or things that go abop in the night,
the name of there's a place that you would committed your accidentally out of
the ranks the night God. All right, welcome back, all right,
levers to Midnight Viewing the Night Gallery podcast, where we discuss Night Gallery Ron
Serling's follow up to The Twilight Zone. I'm father alone and with me here
in the gallery are Ranking on bass is Chris Statue. You're a yellow boy.
I remember you back when you were a side wonder. I love Old
West. I love the Old West, folks. It yields the best fake
accents of all time. And ranking on bassist Mike White. I am a
patient boy. I wait, I wait, I wait. Oh Now that's
so beautiful anyways, much better than anything we're gonna see it tonight. What
we are going to see tonight is Season two, episode eighteen, aired on
January twenty sixth, nineteen seventy two. This episode is split into two segments.
Those are The Waiting Room and Last Writes for the Dead Druid in a
twelve dollars and fifty cent pine box reposes the body of a frontier of Frankie,
armed but disarming, a victim of an old West philosophy that any man
with a good eye a limber finger in a well known trigger scirts the pastures
of immortality. But this chap found out the hard way that immortality is a
wish, a word, but infrequently your reality. You wait, your pleasure,
and a painting we call the Waiting Room. The Waiting Room was written
by Rod Serling, directed by Jeanno Zwark, and stars Steve Forrest, Albert
Salmy, Jim Davis, Buddy Ebson, and Gilbert Rowland. They're throwing out
some blank as blank credits all of a sudden in the opening credits for which
I don't understand. This is the story of a gun slinger named Dicter who
stops into a saloon and encounters a literal murderers row of fellow out laws.
The problem is they're all dead. They are not Dictor. Oh, no,
anyone but Dictor. It would be hard to figure that thing out,
wouldn't it. What did you think of this one, Chris? You take
us back to that holy original episode of Tales from the Crypt. So what
was funny? Is season four episode A to Tales from the Crypt Showdown aired
in nineteen ninety two. That was not even an episode of Tales from the
Crypt. Father Malone, correct me if I'm wrong, but that was actually
a two fisted Tales segment that had been repurposed into a Tales from the Crypt
episode, which would explain why the theme almost doesn't match that show and almost
more matches this show, and as much as this show's theme is whatever the
hell it wants to be. Yeah, that segment is about a gun slinger
who wanders into a town where he's wait, I remember you. You were
Dusty Bill, you were dead on the I saw you get gunned down,
and I swear to god, Buddy Edson's doing the exact same, this whole
thing. It's just that just oh, I remember where am I in hell?
Yes? You are in hell? And so am I for having to
watch this segment because it was just it was like I was having a flashback
to like Gnom, where I was like, oh, I've seen this before
and it was just as bad last time. Wow. Tales from the Crypt
is the equivalent of the Southeastern Asian Conflict of the late nineteen sixties. Okay,
Mike, what's you think of this one? I don't know if it's
the baddest NAM, but it definitely felt like it went on as long as
the Korean War did. In mash it was a very long, long segment.
I literally I looked down at one point, I looked back up and
I said, this is still going on? What's going on? What?
How can this be happening? You were dictor all of a sudden, Yes,
eight breaking minutes, and you feel every single one of them. But
you know what, Rob no longer had control at this point, and they
were doctoring his scripts when he wasn't looking. Oh right, sure, it's
too bad that they took steven additional minutes of them reminiscing out because boy,
I really missed that. Oh boy, good lord. It's just it's you
know what it is. It's almost the Blackout sketch again. And even the
Tales from the Crypt episode is the same way, if an old Western guy
wanders into town and the town looks deserted and there's a bunch of guys around
the table, I think everybody and their mother who has at least a inkling
of an idea of the tropes here would understand what's going on here. Yeah,
like most of Serling's loop episodes, which we've gotten quite a we got
a lot back in the Twilight Zone, but we certainly have had some here
as well, just recently. What is that clacking sound in the heavens?
To be honest with you, the first twenty minutes or so of this segment,
not twenty, but like ten, I was actually totally intrigued. I'm
a sucker for the supernatural. I'm a sucker for the old West. Put
him together, I'm on board. And the performances are solid uniformly. Yeah,
Buddy Epson's fucking great. He's awesome. He's so good. He can't
even salvage how bad this segment is. And it's shot beautifully. The problem
is, as soon as the first gunfighter steps outside, all lingering doubt of
what's going on here dissipates, and that's within seven or so minutes of the
episode. Beginning and now we've got twenty one to go. It should have
remained as oblique as possible, because when it was oblique, when it was
unclear what was happening, I was really into it. I was intrigued.
I wanted to be I wanted it to be really mysterious and not, oh
my god, they're not just going to go to the most obvious place possible.
At the same time, if I had the unfortunate luck of living in
pioneer times in the Old West, I hope that I would at least have
Steve Forrest's sense of style. That fucking stripe suit and that really tasteful kerchief
just read just around the throat and a wide brim chapeau. But not to
overstand it. I liked it. There is a recent movie, The Cohen
Brothers balland of Buster Scrugs. They have the final segment in that called the
Mortal Remains. Oh yes, first time, Yeah, that exactly that.
That's what this should have been and could have been. Unfortunately, all we're
saddled with is a moron of a lead character who everyone keeps telling him their
story. This is how I die. He already knows. He mentions it
himself like, oh heard you got gunned down by so and so and such
and such. Yes, that did happen. I'm that guy. And here
you don't understand though, how did it happen? I don't get it?
How are you here now? It's like, dude, put one, one
and two or next to each other. There is nothing else in between it.
It's you're dead. You're dead, you're dead. Tell me what is
he? But and I love that. It even does the thing where it's
like, do you remember how you got here? I don't even remember how
it got here? Did we never leave? We never left, We're still
there. It's like that, it's so again, this is seventy two,
so we're not. It's still It was used then, but it's over used
now. Maybe it's our twenty twenty three sensibilities peeking through. But it doesn't
even feel a It feels so wrote it. The roteness of it gets in
the way of it even attempting to be entertaining. And then you saddle that
with it being four times as long as it needs to be, just that
they kept doing it over And I love a good groundhog Day type story,
a time loop story is great, but not this way, not that we
get to hear every single person every time, just over and over, like
please just figure it out. The other thing I liked quite a bit it
was the second gun fighter, the gun the gunfighter who's it and closest to
Buddy Ebson. He's the second one to get up and go. That guy's
performance was fantastic. That's Albert Salmy. I knew I knew him from somewhere.
He's Noonan's dad in Caddyshack. Whose child is this? Well, how
many cokes did you have? That guy was that fucking fantastic Western character here
in the war really sticks it to Steve Forrest too. He's like, I
don't want to be your brother, and I would never be related to some
vulture like you. It's like, jeez, Christ's Him and Buddy Ebson are
turning in real, like blistering performances in this. I appreciate that they showed
up and they were like, we know what you're asking us to do.
Lean into this really hard, and they do. Like, I appreciate the
commitment to what they You're needed, It's just like you don't need it this
much. Yeah, because the tone demands the performances those guys are giving that
first opening sequence when we're unsure as to what's happening here. It's it needs
a level of seriousness to bolster everything else. And that's what's good about the
episode. That can I just ask you, guys, because I was unclear
on this the opening and closing shot of him riding up to the hanged man
which turns out to be him. Was that day for night or was that
night? And they just had a really hard light on the hanging man and
Steve Forrest or his stunt double. It looked like a hard light to me
anyway. Yeah, in the opening the first time I started, I went,
that's gotta be day for night. And then at the end I was
like, no, it really looks like a light. So and I'm with
you, by the way, when it comes to horror mixed with Westerns,
I'm sucker for Bret Hart. And yeah, this had so much promise of
oh cool and old West segment. We haven't had one of those before even
what was it? What was the Star Trek episode like Day of the Gun
or whatever that was shot? So yeah, just the amazing like big red
backgrounds and just that kind of like symbolism rather than sets type of thing animalist
set obviously saddle set fronts right. Yeah, obviously they didn't have that much
money or anything, but it worked out really well. So and this one,
like you guys said, shot very well, looks really good. But
just the storytelling. Yeah, and I've said this before, like the Hambone
Purple Prose that I usually accuse Sterling of, if you put it into a
period piece, that it alleviates a whole lot. Suddenly it sounds like sparkling
dialogue. And I have very little to complain about. The problem is it
just never ends. It's and it goes nowhere, and we're all in on
it, like the guys who are sitting in the fucking saloon from the scene
one, and we're just waiting for the dummy to wake up. And I
bore twenty eight minutes for that. But I guess the other thing that I
wonder is, obviously you have the story of a guy who's died, and
then is this the first time he's gone through this? Are they like at
the point, Like the way that they're acting, it's like this motherfucker is
not remembering time to time. So is this like ten loops into this which
is That would have been a more interesting conversation to go towards as what does
it mean to be here? Is there any way to leave? Or are
we doomed forever by our bad choices? No, it's instead it's this guy's
dumb and doesn't know that he's dead, buh like. But the audience picked
up on it immediately. I don't see anyway you as an audience member couldn't
pick up on it in this episode. The show has done good twists in
the past. I'm sure it will do good twists in the future that are
not telegraphed, but this is telegraphed from shot one. We can't be smarter
than the character on screen because then we're just like, this guy's just an
idiot. I do think that this is this character's first time, because he
rides up and he looks at the hanged man and doesn't bother to figure out
who he is, and then the next time he comes he changes that.
So I think this was his first time at the Afterlife rodeo maybe, but
Steve Forrest seems pretty dumb. Yeah. I would think at least the Buddy
Ebson character would be like this guy again. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
That's why they're so frustrated with it. It's like this guy just keeps
coming back asking the same stupid goddamn questions, and we keep telling him the
same shit over and over again, and he's just not listening. Fuck this
guy. The Albert Salmy character, one would have said, how many times
do we have to tell you this? You idiot? That would have been
what I would have written, because it would have been more interesting as opposed
to just okay, like he's here for the first time, but he doesn't
realize it. Maybe it's okay, maybe I understand why you don't realize it.
Then no, but and it would let the character off the hook,
maybe like we know he's an idiot from the opening. We would then view
this scenario through the ghosts are who are already participating the eyes and it's kind
of a tragedy that could have that could have worked. They're much more interesting
to those amongst you with a predilection toward antique collection or the occasional bargain hunting
that takes place in out of the way nooks and stalls. This painting suggests
a certain required, a wariness when it comes to your shopping because there are
moments when behind some dusty book, or in a cobwebbed corner of an ancient
vestibule, you'll uncover a little object dart which can horrify the heck out of
you, such being the case in this painting, when a lady goes junking
about and uncovers a mythological statue that has lived past its time and intrudes on
hers. We call the painting the Last Rites for a Dead Druid. All
right, Last Writes of a Dead Druid, written by Alvin T. Sappin's
lead, directed by Jeno's Wark or should I say Jeno Zoom. The segment
is a zoom fest. We're on that in a minute. And also you
didn't see it at home, but Ron's introduction was very atmospheric. There's a
lot of camera moves this episode. There's a lot of zooming in and out
for bumpers. I dig where it's going anyway. Druid stars Bill Bixby first.
This is his first of two appearances on Night Gallery, Carol Linley the
night Stocker's Own and man, She's adorable? Is that? Who? I
don't care? And Donna Douglas as Mildred. As Mildred mcvaine, she gets
the and as credit that that trend has continued into the next segment. It
also stars ned Glass. He's in two Cold Check episodes Spanish Moss Murders and
Horror and the Heights, which I did with you guys on the Cold Check
daves Over. There almost a decade to go down first time I met you,
mister Mike. But the unseen performer in this segment is Gerald Penny,
Gerald Perry Finnerman. He was the cinematographer. I mentioned the zooms and the
focus pulling. Here he's doing muscular work and it's delicate and elegant. The
focus pulling, like I said, is out of hand. He was a
lifelong TV camera guy with occasional foris into features. But there were some interesting
TV shows he worked on, like Cork the Richard Benjamin Sip written by Button
by Buck Henry. He did that entire series. He did the Planet of
the Apes entire TV series. He did one of my favorite TV movies,
Devildog, Hound of Hell and oh yeah, sixty episodes of Star Trek.
Speaking of Star Trek, but anyway, hey guys, do you remember when
Stephen Moffatt created the Weeping Angels on Doctor who Ah. Thank you. Those
statues that move when you're not looking terrifying and holy original creation. Anyway,
this is the story. It all look like Bill Bixby, a young lawyer
whose wife gives him an ancient statue that may not have started out as stone.
Chris, what did you think of this one? Similarly to the last
segment, it was a tad long, but it was goofy if that was
what they were going for. I had had a chortal or two throughout.
And I'll tell you why, because that statue doesn't look like Bill Bixby at
all, no matter how hard they try to convince you. They could have
had him rip his own face off and put it on there, and then
it would have been like, yes, now it looks like Bill Bixby,
only because Bill Bixby's actual faces on it. It doesn't look like him.
So it makes every time they show its face really funny because it looks funny.
And then the premise is I was gonna say the omen kind of I
don't know. It's like there's all these like weird, like premonitory premonition things
that you were going to do this and you're being possessed by this and it's
goofy, and for that I can appreciate it. It didn't need to be
thirty minutes. But again, I feel like maybe that's like our we should
stop saying that at this point, because holy shit, we've said it a
lot, and this episode obviously is a candidate for that because there's only two
segments. So I think it was fun and goofy, but if they were
trying to be serious, they failed real art. I thought this was a
lot of fun. I had a great time. First off. I think
that the Night Gallery should expand just from posters or side paintings into statuary as
well. I think that they really need to expand their business, and having
this in the gallery I think would be a great conversation piece and it could
be sold fairly easily. I'm not sure who's in the market for life size
statues of people screaming with crowbars in their hands an ancient crow bar, by
the way, an ancient crow bar. Yes, And to your point,
Mike, I thought that they were going to do something with a statue,
because Rod is standing in front of a weird dragon statue at the beginning of
this episode, and I was like, oh, hold on, are we
like there are things in the background in the night Gallery that aren't paintings.
They just never go up to them. And it's like, why wasn't this
that time, of all times, you could have your Bill Bixby statue just
standing there. I actually have an answer for that, which is the sculptures
were all purchased all at once, make us weird objects to Pepper the background
and Tom Wright did all of the individual paintings for the episodes because they even
if they're going to have statues show up, it's still a painting gallery.
I agree wholeheartedly with you. They should have just had the goddamn statue sitting
in the night gallery and he goes, this thing, isn't it weird looking?
Didn't won't you like to know what the story behind this is? Yes,
we would rode, but again, like I get why they had to
stick with the consistency of the paintings. The paintings ultimately are more successful,
but then you could have made it feel more tailored to each story, like
you know, a specific item like look at this item here. Narrow view
of what a gallery can hold, even when they're displaying what a gallery can
hold right all around him. I really was hoping that the statue would change
as it was going through. I did like that this episode has what the
last episode didn't, or a segment I should say, which is actually things
happening and changing so it's not just the same thing over and over again.
I was afraid the first time the statue showed up in his bedroom that it
would only terrorize him at night and that it would just keep doing the whole
creep up thing. But I was really happy to see the way it progresses
is in the way that Bill Bixby is changing, and especially when he tries
to sacrifice the cat was so funny. I gotta say, Donna Douglas,
this is a competition between who is the more attractive blonde. These ladies are
both just incredible. It's really a fistfight. Yes, yeah, I totally
agree. Because here's the wife who is one thousand percent adorable, Carolynley,
and then here's the temptress. It's like, what could they possibly owe her?
Oh yeah, okay, I got it, I get yeah yeah,
And I honestly it took me a minute to realize that that was Donna Douglas
I and she even had the Southern accent. So I'm like, why did
I not just immediately think Ellie May when I saw her? And I guess
it might have been the outfits or something, but man, oh man,
she's a knockout Beverly Hillbilly's alumni in this episode yeps and too right, Yeah
yeah, and yeah, Buddy wasn't looking too bad either. No, yeah,
she's no, she's great, she's great. I don't know if this
segment needed another like her character, like, she's not in cahoots with the
Sorcerer, She's just she's just tempting him. So it feels like these things
happening at the same time. I wish they had maybe given us a little
bit more of a through line as too, maybe she has some sort of
interior motive because again that we've seen that before in this show as well,
where they're like, oh, she's she just seems to be into Bill Bixby,
which you know what with those turtlenecks and stuff, Like, I get
it, she's a good looking guy, but that statue with that facial hair.
On the other hand, he's looking like a real dork. We've got
a triangle here, and it's a pretty good one. But to your point,
Chris, what we needed is more of Mildred's character to get her point
of view from what was going on here. Having said that, this is
one of my favorites from this season and like, I had a blast watching
this one. I thought Zwark's direction is on point. I thought the story
was good even if I knew where it was going. Nobody could have predicted
that moment, Mike, where Eddie's father holds a cat over a barbecue with
the full intention of frying it alive, and I fully believed he was going
to do it. Just those the maids that comes up. I just putting
in my notice the poor maid that's just like a guest. She's have to
leave now. This man's trying to cookies cat. Oh, it's so good.
It's just the adr of all the cats sound effects poecasts, just like
what are you doing? And then the sound effects. As a callback to
an earlier Night Gallery episode, Bill Bixby struck me this time around as a
perfect analog of Roddy McDowell, because when he's endearing, he's very endearing,
and when he's starmy, Oh, I just want to drown him, and
he gets both here and now added layer here the sort of fierce character,
the fierce Bill Bixby we get here as the Sorcerer was actually pretty great too.
I mentioned all the zooms going on on here. When Bill Bixby lays
out the statues origins. This is before he starts to get possessed. It
starts on a closeup of the statue, which turns out to be a photograph,
which pans tilts up to Carol Linley, which turns out she's in a
mirror. It then zooms back to include the entire room. It's slick in
economical coverage, Jano's work, ladies and gentlemen. I just I can't anyway.
Also during that scene, Bill bill Bixby's laying out the history, as
I said, and he's being very iriatited it. And then when he gets
to the word raping, he says, raping. There's no g at the
end, like I could all rap He sure does? Is it twice?
Actually? Which is new there just a little odd to hear. It's so
casual. I also laughed like crazy when they said the statue's eyes have changed,
and then they cut to it and it looks like a whole different head
on the statue. The orange eyes though, those red eyes orange head.
I'm like, what did they do refurbish its head? I actually love the
shop owner who's just had this thing sitting around for years, like this freakiest
fucking thing. I would get that thing out of my shop and take it
away, you know, after a while, if it's sitting in your shop,
he's like, I think it's time to just get rid of this nightmare
of a piece of artwork because it looks like a human being stuck in concrete.
Wait ah, wait, he's only getting rid of it to make room
for a dinette, so otherwise he wanted to have it around some more.
I guess he takes it back at the end. He doesn't get that one
back, and he's very mad. He wants it back a set. Yeah,
so Bill Bixby murders his wife. Then at the end, like after
he turns, he just kills her and then just becoming Anton Leavey of the
seventies. Yeah, I kind of like it doesn't mind at all. Hey,
that's a fun bad ending, But like a bum it's a bummer of
an ending, right, I guess if you perceive the Bill Bixby character as
the hero of the piece. He gets frozen, but you know, the
bad guy wins in the end. Ain't nothing wrong with that. Oh,
speaking of zooms, that second scene, the scene where Mildred gets confronted by
him that she doesn't mind at all things talk about the first of all,
they're subtle like hints with the with lighting, and then they got that circular
fucking barbecue that explodes into flame. But the scene where like I said that,
there is this very subtle lighting shift on Bill Bixby and then he's possessed.
So it's mostly Bill Bixby's performance that sounds it. But that whole scene
is fantastic. I'm just gonna keep praising this of the segment. Yeah,
yeah, it's mostly or his work here, But the performances are just as
on point, as is the script by Alvin Sappinsley, who is our only
hope these days. These are originals too, These aren't based I mean that's
the other thing. A lot of these are like you go and look and
it's based on a short story by X Y and Z. And these last
two segments I've both been a sterling original and a Sappin's the original and Sterling
is what he is. But this is way better, way better. Yeah,
yeah, this one. I think if I had seen this one I
was a kid, it would really stick with me. I could see,
Oh don't you remember that episode with Bill Bixby where it turns into a statue
because at the end when he's going to beat it with that with his own
crowbar, I thought that was very effective. And remember we had an episode
with James Farrantino earlier in this season. It's basically the same story as this
one, so they can keep telling the same stories over and over again as
long as they're eventually going to get it right, because they got it right
here. And this was better than that segment too, that one that you're
referencing. I think you better, That's what I'm saying. A thousand yea
better. But it's the same idea. It's the same plot effectively, but
reworked and shot well and written well and performed well, and here we go.
And it was also smart to switch the main character as opposed to the
like the secondary character, because in that one, wasn't it his wife is
the one that's swapping, right, This gives it like, yeah, this
gives it like a lot more stakes, and also like it just gives a
lot more weight that he's the one and he's doing it, but the story
is being presented effectively by his point of view. It just gives it some
more weight because I'm with that character the whole time, and that one it
was like, it's his wife and he has to prevent it, and again
we'rein is invested as he is, but here it's okay, it's the one
who's in trouble. And yeah, he swings at the statue and because he
throws the same way, the exact same way, is that convenient with his
own crowbar? It was fun. It was fun and that's all it needed
to be. And I'm with you, Mike, if I had seen this
as a kid, when I'm like, that's some freaky shit, because the
statue sticks with you. It is such a choice. The last one does
look like oh yeah, yeah, And I love that when he becomes the
monk that he then gets like the little fake beard. Oh my god,
it's so wonderful. Yes, seeing Bixbid any attempt at sinister is welcome,
very welcome. Oh yeah, and when his eyes change, I'm just like,
oh, don't make them angry. Here we go. Yeah, check
the end cretis lugna in here. All right, Well, we're gonna play
a preview of the next episode and we'll be rare and we'll be right back
to wrap things up. Number one entry a painting that suggests a story replete
with gaslight, handsome cabs, and cadavers, an all star cast of corpses
appearing in what we call deliveries in the rear, Delivered to me now on
night Gallery. Painting Number two in the Night Gallery, addressing itself to the
strains and stresses of the married, having to do with the fact that there
is more than one way to kill a cat and more than one way to
dispose of a wife. Our painting is called stop killing Me. Here we
have a cameo den problem. How to flee the coupe, how to make
tracks away from the police and unhappy peers ship out to safer climbs. The
story of a chap who, if he'd had it to do over again,
what have remained where he was? He finds out that he is precisely what
is the title of the picture, deadweight. That's right on the next Midnight
viewing. We'll be taking a look at season two, episode nineteen that's broken
into three segments, Deliveries in the Rear, Stop Killing Me, and Deadweight
until next time. What are you working on and where can people find it?
Chris Statue, Weirdingwaymedia dot Com is where everything I'm working on can be
found, including but not limited to the Culture Cast, ranking on Bass Life
and Times Captain Barney Miller, Dreams for Stale, Stale Dreams for stale,
Dreams for Sale is it can't be stale, just like this that's still going
nearing the end as well. So that's and then there's all the other things
we've done that are completed you can listen to in their entirety, which you
should do, and you can find all that at Weirdingwaymedia dot com. How
about you, Mike, Why what are you doing? One my doing?
I just do a show every week called The Projection Booth and you can find
that over at Weirdingwaymedia dot com. I guess I also work on The Chabby
Detective, also those Stale Dreams, and yeah, a few other things all
available at the same place. Chris is just talking about and if you want
to see some of my ridiculous video I would put go over to fatheromlone dot
com. Thank you all for joining us here at midnight viewing. The gallery
is now closed.