1 00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:03,560 When I was eighteen years old, I received a bid from a top tier 2 00:00:03,600 --> 00:00:08,880 sorority at the University of Maryland. Accepting my coronation into one of Greek life's 3 00:00:08,960 --> 00:00:15,720 royal families would soon alter the trajectory of my college experience entirely. Three years 4 00:00:15,759 --> 00:00:20,320 after a dramatic exit from my sorority, I released a podcast series about my 5 00:00:20,399 --> 00:00:25,960 experience to break the culture of silence that is intentionally cultivated in these environments. 6 00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:31,280 After releasing Season one, I received an outpour of messages from individuals ready to 7 00:00:31,280 --> 00:00:36,000 tell their own greek life horror stories on the record. This isn't just my 8 00:00:36,079 --> 00:00:46,880 story anymore. Welcome to SNAP Season two. Snapped. Sorority recruitment, also 9 00:00:46,960 --> 00:00:53,399 known as Rush, is sorority world's biggest event of the year in historically white 10 00:00:53,560 --> 00:00:58,960 sororities. Recruitment is when the PMMs, which stands for potential new members, 11 00:00:59,280 --> 00:01:03,200 have the chance to visit each sorority chapter on campus. But sorority of recruitment 12 00:01:03,280 --> 00:01:08,040 is no casual meet and greet. It's a highly regimented, planned out event 13 00:01:08,319 --> 00:01:15,519 that gets increasingly serious and exclusive with each round. For the PNM, recruitment 14 00:01:15,599 --> 00:01:21,840 is like an audition, and throughout the multiday extravaganza. The pnms are assigned 15 00:01:21,959 --> 00:01:26,480 different sorority members to whom they must prove that they are worthy of being in 16 00:01:26,519 --> 00:01:32,480 that chapter. There's so much pressure to look amazing, and you're trying to 17 00:01:32,519 --> 00:01:36,640 get these like privileged like girls to want you. And for the sorority, 18 00:01:36,959 --> 00:01:42,519 recruitment is when the chapter needs to appear as polished as possible. The sorority 19 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:49,319 sisters are selling their empowering sisterhood, generous philanthropy, and exclusive membership perks. 20 00:01:49,920 --> 00:01:53,680 You're selling yourself. It's like you're the product that they want to be you. 21 00:01:55,159 --> 00:01:57,719 The goal for the chapter is to hit quota. Quota is the number 22 00:01:57,799 --> 00:02:04,519 each sorority may pledge on campus during formal recruitment. Hit quota every year that 23 00:02:04,640 --> 00:02:07,359 I was on the team. And if you hit quota, that's what matters, 24 00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:12,599 and the chapter will do whatever it takes to ensure that X number of 25 00:02:12,719 --> 00:02:19,800 PMMs buy their product of lifelong membership benefits. I think recruitment cost us about 26 00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:23,159 fourteen thousand dollars, which ultimately wasn't successful. We didn't reach our quota that 27 00:02:23,240 --> 00:02:28,759 year. What the pnms aren't told is that their interest in the sorority is 28 00:02:28,919 --> 00:02:34,120 paramount to the chapter's survival on campus. In order for these organizations to stay 29 00:02:34,159 --> 00:02:39,319 afloat, they require a constant source of income from do paying members that must 30 00:02:39,400 --> 00:02:46,400 be replenished each year when all the seniors graduate. Those massive chapter houses are 31 00:02:46,520 --> 00:02:52,479 expensive and they need the beds build. They said, being a sorority woman 32 00:02:52,639 --> 00:02:57,400 is having people outside of your circle for the purpose of recruiting people. We 33 00:02:57,479 --> 00:03:00,599 may as well have been like those people who like give out by bowls at 34 00:03:00,599 --> 00:03:05,199 the metro station, and sometimes we kind of then do that on campus, 35 00:03:05,199 --> 00:03:08,719 like we just set up a pop up time. Nothing stops sorority recruitment, 36 00:03:08,879 --> 00:03:15,159 not even a goddamn pandemic. It was all held on Zoom. Need to 37 00:03:15,159 --> 00:03:20,919 get a new pledge class, Gotta hit quota. Welcome to part one of 38 00:03:20,960 --> 00:03:28,680 the Snapped three part Recruitment special where we investigate sorority World's biggest event of the 39 00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:38,360 year. I'm your host, Lucy Taylor. This is snapped at the start 40 00:03:38,360 --> 00:03:43,599 of the school semester. It's common for sorority members to arrive to campus one 41 00:03:43,639 --> 00:03:47,120 to two weeks early so that they can attend recruitment training. And who better 42 00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:53,560 to lead and oversee this training than alumni of the sorority chapter. They taught 43 00:03:53,639 --> 00:03:58,919 us how to do recruitment, and in that session, one of the alumni 44 00:03:58,960 --> 00:04:00,800 members came up. She was giving us like what was supposed to be an 45 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:05,159 inspirational speech, and she compared our chapter to the World Trade Center, and 46 00:04:05,199 --> 00:04:09,080 she's like, you can fall back down and you can stay down, or 47 00:04:09,120 --> 00:04:12,080 you can build yourself back up. And I'm like, I don't even know 48 00:04:12,319 --> 00:04:17,519 how to explain how inappropriate it is to compare the losing of three thousand lives 49 00:04:17,560 --> 00:04:25,240 to a shitty sorority chapter. They bring in this person who's an alumni of 50 00:04:25,279 --> 00:04:30,560 the chapter, who is basically coaching you on how to do recruitment. She 51 00:04:30,639 --> 00:04:34,360 would tell us, you want this chapter to be one that you could not 52 00:04:34,519 --> 00:04:38,439 have gotten into. Being shut down was always a threat, like if we 53 00:04:38,519 --> 00:04:41,800 messed up during the Zoom workshops, it would be like you messed up a 54 00:04:41,879 --> 00:04:44,800 Zoom workshop, which means we're not going to be perfect on recruitment day, 55 00:04:44,839 --> 00:04:46,319 which means girls aren't going to join, which means our sorority is going to 56 00:04:46,360 --> 00:04:49,399 get shut down and it's going to be your fault. Personally. I spoke 57 00:04:49,439 --> 00:04:55,399 with Amanda, an alumni from Berkeley, and she explained to me that she 58 00:04:55,639 --> 00:05:00,519 was in the first ever pledge class of a chapter and they didn't care about 59 00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:05,319 being topped here until recruitment came around. The desperation kicked in to be talked. 60 00:05:05,439 --> 00:05:10,720 Here were the alumni advisors, the ones who were really pushing that, 61 00:05:10,920 --> 00:05:14,800 or was it your chapter? Hell yeah, it was the alumni advisors. 62 00:05:15,120 --> 00:05:19,759 So the advisors that I had, they're probably fresh out of college or maybe 63 00:05:19,759 --> 00:05:26,000 like twenty five twenty six. We learned very quickly that we were considered too 64 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:30,600 casual and a little to run down as a house. And I remember we, 65 00:05:31,079 --> 00:05:34,120 of course most houses. They came on every campus. You show up 66 00:05:34,160 --> 00:05:39,279 about a week or two weeks prior to everyone else to prepare for recruitment, 67 00:05:39,319 --> 00:05:42,120 which is sucked up in it of itself. It's like I have to truncate 68 00:05:42,199 --> 00:05:46,240 my summer break and I can't focus on my classes or focus on preparing for 69 00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:49,600 school. I have to devout two weeks to just pandering to this ideology to 70 00:05:49,680 --> 00:05:55,519 like bring in woman. It's just like going to cirority camp. They actually 71 00:05:55,560 --> 00:05:58,800 brought in a woman to teach us how to do makeup. They were definitely 72 00:05:58,879 --> 00:06:01,879 a huge chunk of girls in my house. That we're not considered seminin enough, 73 00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:09,120 or fin enough, or preventible enough, So it seems like step one 74 00:06:09,680 --> 00:06:14,079 is shame. The alumni advisor tells you this is a shitty chapter. We 75 00:06:14,160 --> 00:06:16,800 want to turn this chapter into one that you couldn't have gotten into. You 76 00:06:16,839 --> 00:06:20,360 hear me, say, alumni advisor, and you might think, who the 77 00:06:20,399 --> 00:06:26,639 fuck is that the alumni advisors were once in the sorority themselves, have graduated 78 00:06:26,839 --> 00:06:30,920 and now hold a volunteer position for Nationals. Who the fuck is Nationals? 79 00:06:31,360 --> 00:06:39,040 Good question. Feather Footed on Reddit compares Nationals to a McDonald's franchise. They 80 00:06:39,079 --> 00:06:44,920 state, quote, there is an overarching organization which spans the country, and 81 00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:48,680 the frat or sorority that you pledge to is really just one storefront of this 82 00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:54,480 mega corporation. Of course, you'll always have your favorite memories at your hometown 83 00:06:54,519 --> 00:06:58,759 restaurant, and there might be certain customized menu items that you prefer in a 84 00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:02,120 special way, but ultimately you can go to another store ten years later, 85 00:07:02,160 --> 00:07:06,040 at a different restaurant in some other part of the country and get largely the 86 00:07:06,160 --> 00:07:12,279 same experience. And the way that the company keeps that going smoothly is by 87 00:07:12,439 --> 00:07:17,319 organizing all their franchises into little regions and assigning regional managers to keep tabs on 88 00:07:17,360 --> 00:07:24,240 the restaurants there. The regional managers appoint local store managers, and the store 89 00:07:24,279 --> 00:07:30,519 managers can bring in even more people to help delegate their responsibilities of advising the 90 00:07:30,560 --> 00:07:34,399 employees of the restaurant end quote. So the local store managers are the chapter 91 00:07:34,519 --> 00:07:41,120 alumni advisors, and the employees of the restaurant are the actives in the chapter. 92 00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:46,519 To continue with this analogy, it's like Alpha Fia is McDonald's, tridell 93 00:07:46,560 --> 00:07:49,759 as Burger King, and Theta is Wendy's, and they're all competing to be 94 00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:55,560 the top restaurant. So the sororities use this workshop week to ensure that their 95 00:07:55,600 --> 00:08:01,439 employees i mean members are up to par and if they aren't, they mold 96 00:08:01,519 --> 00:08:05,480 you into shape so that you fit the brand. Ever since their inception, 97 00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:13,560 sororities have monitored and molded members behavior to fit their ideal of a white conservative 98 00:08:13,800 --> 00:08:18,199 ladylike sorority girl. I learned about this and Women of Discriminating Taste, which 99 00:08:18,240 --> 00:08:24,399 is a book by Margaret Freeman that examines the role of historically white sororities in 100 00:08:24,439 --> 00:08:28,439 the shaping of white womanhood in the twentieth century. The book states that quote, 101 00:08:28,639 --> 00:08:35,039 sorority etiquette and pledge training books instructed the woman on everything from becoming involved 102 00:08:35,039 --> 00:08:41,200 in campus activities and the proper application of makeup to cultivating a pleasant speaking voice 103 00:08:41,279 --> 00:08:43,720 and the correct way to get in and out of a chair end quote. 104 00:08:43,759 --> 00:08:50,879 Margaret's book provided me with a profound insight into the history of these groups, 105 00:08:50,159 --> 00:08:54,600 and so I was thrilled that she agreed to come on Snapped. Freeman is 106 00:08:54,639 --> 00:09:00,399 a scholar with a PhD in American studies, a trained writer, searcher, 107 00:09:00,679 --> 00:09:05,080 and cultural historian, and I'm honored to say that Freeman herself will be providing 108 00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:11,960 a historical context throughout the season. Freeman's book explains that sebrities would base their 109 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:18,519 idea of a perfect cebrity girl off of what Margaret Freeman calls the Southern esthetic. 110 00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:24,200 Freeman will now explain what the Southern esthetic represents. The Southern aesthetic, 111 00:09:24,320 --> 00:09:26,559 as I term it, is like a style of being or a mode of 112 00:09:26,600 --> 00:09:31,440 self presentation. It's most obvious in the devotion to what we might think of 113 00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:37,559 as this popular Southern imentry, and that was the image that was nationally promoted 114 00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:41,399 and accepted across the US in the first half of the twentieth century. It 115 00:09:41,519 --> 00:09:46,879 was pushed out through advertising and entertainment, and it presented a really sanitized, 116 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:50,039 very white image of this quote unquote old South. You know, that's the 117 00:09:50,039 --> 00:09:54,240 picture we've learned, the large plantation homes that you know, mythically everyone lived 118 00:09:54,240 --> 00:09:58,000 in. That image of the Southern lady, southern belle, and the hoopskirt 119 00:09:58,159 --> 00:10:03,080 standing on the five branda of a home with large white columns. It's sort 120 00:10:03,080 --> 00:10:05,960 of gone with the wind picture. But what we don't see here, or 121 00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:09,600 what we've been taught to ignore, really is the horrors of slavery, the 122 00:10:09,720 --> 00:10:16,000 enslavement and terrorization of black people whose forced labor enabled that vision of the white 123 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:18,799 old South that's been the standard image for so many years. And so the 124 00:10:18,799 --> 00:10:24,759 continuance of the Southern esthetic here also provides a symbolic means than of preserving white, 125 00:10:26,039 --> 00:10:31,919 mostly Protestant elite interests. And I argue that's what's going on with national 126 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:37,600 sororities in the twentyth century and continuing certainly today. It is about maintaining that 127 00:10:37,679 --> 00:10:43,519 white privilege with the limited membership, the sort of selective membership practices and importantly, 128 00:10:43,720 --> 00:10:48,799 the Southern esthetic allows you to promote that ideal implicitly without being really obvious 129 00:10:48,879 --> 00:10:52,679 about this. So certainly we see the explicit use of Southern imagery in sororities 130 00:10:52,679 --> 00:10:58,720 and fraternities right through things like plantation theme parties and pageants, through building and 131 00:10:58,799 --> 00:11:03,840 even remodeling of cha after houses to present that Southern colonial architectural style, the 132 00:11:03,879 --> 00:11:09,600 one that evokes this popularized image we have of the sort of quote unquote plantation 133 00:11:09,639 --> 00:11:13,559 home. The sorority women or modeled their behavior is modeling this ideal of the 134 00:11:13,559 --> 00:11:18,759 Southern lady. You're supposed to be the epitome of woman of the ladylike ideal. 135 00:11:18,039 --> 00:11:22,759 And even in some national organizations like FAMU the women's fraternity, and cap 136 00:11:22,799 --> 00:11:28,840 alph Order the men's fraternity, you have actual hero worship of Confederate officers. 137 00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:31,799 And that's up to the contemporary times. In my dad, this is not 138 00:11:31,840 --> 00:11:33,879 just over one hundred years ago. So even when you don't see all of 139 00:11:33,879 --> 00:11:41,240 the blatant mimicking of these Southern symbols, the southerness that still signals a protective 140 00:11:41,320 --> 00:11:46,960 space for white people and white privilege in these national organizations, sororities would emulate 141 00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:52,559 the Southern esthetic in various ways, but particularly at recruitment and women of discriminating 142 00:11:52,600 --> 00:11:56,080 taste. It states that in nineteen thirty four, Alpha kay Omega and the 143 00:11:56,159 --> 00:12:03,600 University of Illinois bracked about their successful rush parties, including a traditional Southern breakfast. 144 00:12:03,639 --> 00:12:09,200 The journal read that the sorority woman decorated a table with colored dolls and 145 00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:13,960 bales of cotton. It goes on to say that the event included entertainment by 146 00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:20,200 quote members of the active Chapter who dressed as negroes and sang Southern songs end 147 00:12:20,279 --> 00:12:26,519 quote. Freeman points out that by holding events that celebrated this mythic image of 148 00:12:26,639 --> 00:12:31,759 Southern planter culture, sorority sisters from the South and non South would find common 149 00:12:31,879 --> 00:12:37,240 ground. Despite their Southern and non Southern regional differences. They could assure themselves 150 00:12:37,279 --> 00:12:46,559 of their race and class superiority by participating in these displays of old South pageantry. 151 00:12:46,960 --> 00:12:54,080 So let's get back to contemporary sorority world and see how emulating the Southern 152 00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:58,000 esthetic carries out today. I'd like to now introduce you to someone who we 153 00:12:58,039 --> 00:13:01,879 will call Megan. Am I allowed to say the name of the authority totally. 154 00:13:03,120 --> 00:13:05,320 I'm gonna do it okay, okay, And I was a part of 155 00:13:05,320 --> 00:13:09,519 Find You. Megan is a current student and is using a pseudonym to protect 156 00:13:09,519 --> 00:13:15,279 her identity and safety. Megan provided me with all the ins and outs of 157 00:13:15,759 --> 00:13:20,919 Zoom recruitment during the pandemic. It was all over Zoom and they started in 158 00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:24,120 the summer, like sending us a look book, which I sent you should 159 00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:26,679 we go through it? I would love to go through the lookbook. So 160 00:13:26,759 --> 00:13:33,159 the twenty twenty Fall of Recruitment pack, okay, so lots of important dates. 161 00:13:33,279 --> 00:13:37,480 From August twenty first to September thirteenth, it was like every day training. 162 00:13:37,679 --> 00:13:41,200 On August twenty third, it was eleven am to seven pm a workshop. 163 00:13:41,799 --> 00:13:43,840 Yeah, except if we like had messed up the night before. She 164 00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:46,000 would be like, all right, I'm adding three hours. We're going to 165 00:13:46,039 --> 00:13:50,240 have to stay even longer because you guys just can't get together. What would 166 00:13:50,279 --> 00:13:52,159 messing up be? Well, she wanted us to this thing where we all 167 00:13:52,159 --> 00:13:56,480 wanted to breakout rooms, and we would like rotate through the breakout rooms, 168 00:13:56,559 --> 00:13:58,600 like we did have a room to go into and we ne each have a 169 00:13:58,679 --> 00:14:01,480 room to go out of. It was really confusing because all on Zoom it 170 00:14:01,519 --> 00:14:03,440 was a brand new thing. And if we had, like mister Q, 171 00:14:03,720 --> 00:14:05,399 if we had gone into the wrong room, she'd be like, all right, 172 00:14:05,639 --> 00:14:09,759 another hour. We're staying till nine. What do you do in these 173 00:14:09,840 --> 00:14:13,840 meetings? Like practice talking? You would practice talking to one another, like 174 00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:16,600 one of us would be the potential new member and the other one would be 175 00:14:16,639 --> 00:14:18,039 to find you. It would be a role play. It'd be a role 176 00:14:18,039 --> 00:14:20,480 play, yeah, and it'd be like what's your name? Like where are 177 00:14:20,480 --> 00:14:24,919 you from? And just a lot of like kind of fake stuff like if 178 00:14:24,919 --> 00:14:26,639 somebody says something that you don't know what it's it, you just say like, 179 00:14:26,639 --> 00:14:28,919 oh my god, I love it and keep going on. We'll do 180 00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:33,879 like a recruitment workshop week and we'll have you know, five six hour days 181 00:14:33,039 --> 00:14:39,120 where you're learning how to greet someone. You're practicing having conversations, practicing transitions. 182 00:14:39,320 --> 00:14:41,639 It was so nice to meet you. You're actually going to talk to 183 00:14:41,679 --> 00:14:45,519 my other sister right now. Have a great rest of recruitment. You're being 184 00:14:45,559 --> 00:14:48,320 told what to say, you're being told what not to say. There's like 185 00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:54,679 the five bees or it's like boys booze, I guess now Biden, politics, 186 00:14:54,679 --> 00:14:58,799 Bible, so religion, and we were explicit about the bees because they're 187 00:14:58,799 --> 00:15:03,159 just things you're supposed to avoid as a good sorority lady. You should not 188 00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:07,759 bring up Biden because you don't want things to get political. Margaret Freeman points 189 00:15:07,759 --> 00:15:13,799 out that while Sebrity alumni were actively promoting a conservative political ideology, they acted 190 00:15:13,840 --> 00:15:18,759 like sororities had no involvement in the political realm, and protest of any kind 191 00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:26,240 was forbidden because protesting is unladylike. In my interview with Freeman, she elaborates 192 00:15:26,840 --> 00:15:31,000 they always had had this non political presentation. They don't want to offend somebody 193 00:15:31,080 --> 00:15:35,039 in the organization. I think by the time where they're trying to keep people 194 00:15:35,080 --> 00:15:41,440 out of protests, perhaps particularly in relation to school desegregation at colleges, that 195 00:15:41,600 --> 00:15:45,480 either side of that was gonna look bad for them to somebody, right, 196 00:15:45,679 --> 00:15:50,759 and the idea that a lady would not be out protesting, they would be 197 00:15:50,799 --> 00:15:54,720 bringing shame on the organization for just doing that, no matter which side they 198 00:15:54,759 --> 00:15:58,039 were on. Hey, rapes, just a quick reminder to not where your 199 00:15:58,120 --> 00:16:02,080 letters to protests. That's really important that we keep arm into our chapter. 200 00:16:03,159 --> 00:16:07,639 In Women of Discriminating Taste, it says that members of the Gamma Pie Housing 201 00:16:07,720 --> 00:16:12,200 Corporation and alumni group warned that any member or pledge who is involved in any 202 00:16:12,240 --> 00:16:18,559 way in any demonstration regarding the integration situation will lose her membership in the fraternity 203 00:16:18,639 --> 00:16:25,039 automatically. In a copy of the Gamma Pie House Corporation letter sent to University 204 00:16:25,080 --> 00:16:29,279 of Georgia's Dean of Women, the alumni noted that, quote, we prefer 205 00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:33,519 to keep our girls completely out of any demonstrations against the Negroes, and this 206 00:16:33,679 --> 00:16:37,840 is just the most effective control we have end quote. Margaret Freeman goes on 207 00:16:37,879 --> 00:16:42,159 to say that it seemed like the safest thing and to maintain the ladyhood quote 208 00:16:42,240 --> 00:16:48,480 unquote of the members and the reputation of the chapter. Just don't say anything, 209 00:16:48,799 --> 00:16:52,960 don't be involved. And that has been the party line the whole time. 210 00:16:53,159 --> 00:16:56,840 Don't say anything until you get to the point where if you don't say 211 00:16:56,840 --> 00:17:00,600 anything, you look bad for not saying anything. And I think that's maybe 212 00:17:00,679 --> 00:17:04,960 point we're at now. Yes, that is the point that we're at now. 213 00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:08,880 In twenty twenty, during the George Floyd protests and the tense racial climate, 214 00:17:10,240 --> 00:17:14,720 sororities had to keep their gen Z target audience in mind. It would 215 00:17:14,759 --> 00:17:19,279 have looked bad to say nothing, but instead of perhaps owning their racist recruitment 216 00:17:19,319 --> 00:17:26,119 practices or their racist history, they'd say things like racism has no place in 217 00:17:26,119 --> 00:17:32,079 this chapter, or Alpha Fea stands with you hand in hand, Union hand 218 00:17:32,119 --> 00:17:37,599 in hand. So this shows the potential new members. Oh, the sorority 219 00:17:37,720 --> 00:17:42,759 supports Black Lives Matter, and they're very much unaware of the skeletons in the 220 00:17:42,799 --> 00:17:49,599 sororities closet that are never brought up by the organization over recruitment. They emphasize 221 00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:55,279 how they were supporting Black Lives Matter and they donated all this money you played 222 00:17:55,279 --> 00:17:57,720 at the Little Sorority Bengo for it, and they bought a Black Lives Matter 223 00:17:57,759 --> 00:18:00,839 banner and they posted on the front. So you know, I thought, 224 00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:04,920 wow, like they really do care about like other people other than themselves, 225 00:18:04,960 --> 00:18:08,039 like you know, the white person bubble. That I was wrong. I 226 00:18:08,079 --> 00:18:14,880 found out a lot of them are like Trump supporters and they're Blue Lives Matter, 227 00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:18,119 and they were like all lives matter, and I'm like, how are 228 00:18:18,119 --> 00:18:19,799 you gonna say blue lives and all lives matter when you have like a Black 229 00:18:19,799 --> 00:18:25,559 Lives Matter posted on your band. I'm Claudia Vega I a student at the 230 00:18:25,720 --> 00:18:30,680 University of Illinois and I recently in the past few months disaffiliated from Greek life. 231 00:18:30,799 --> 00:18:36,400 We were what we are the most diverse quote unquote house in Panhellenic which 232 00:18:36,440 --> 00:18:40,160 is the white Greek life might go by. So we are known as the 233 00:18:40,240 --> 00:18:45,240 quote unquote most diverse house with sisters brag about it during Rush. Yeah, 234 00:18:45,319 --> 00:18:48,319 and that was something I really did not sit write with me, especially I 235 00:18:48,359 --> 00:18:52,240 know this year during Rush my sophomore so this last fall twenty twenty, that 236 00:18:52,359 --> 00:18:55,480 was something that people talked about, especially because coming at the political climate that 237 00:18:55,519 --> 00:18:57,759 we're in, that's something they wanted to really kind of advertise. And I 238 00:18:57,799 --> 00:19:02,039 did not like that at all. Like a house said like we support like 239 00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:04,359 BLM, and our house also had a BLM flag on it, which if 240 00:19:04,400 --> 00:19:08,319 it's genuine, I'm all for that, But I think that kind of advertising 241 00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:12,759 was a false advertisement and it's really disrespectful to just honestly it is. And 242 00:19:12,839 --> 00:19:17,079 in social media, like the post stuff in solidarity with these movements, which 243 00:19:17,079 --> 00:19:18,759 I think were awareness for versus I think it's a really good thing. At 244 00:19:18,759 --> 00:19:22,839 the same time, when they're putting in social media and their advertising during recruitment 245 00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:26,039 and then they're not only put in the work behind the scenes. There's I 246 00:19:26,039 --> 00:19:30,720 think there's a big disconnected issue there. So remember how I was talking about 247 00:19:30,720 --> 00:19:34,319 the fact that sorority ladies from the South and the non salve would find common 248 00:19:34,359 --> 00:19:41,279 ground and reassure themselves of their own race and class superiority by practicing the Southern 249 00:19:41,359 --> 00:19:47,160 esthetic. Well. Freeman also points out that quote non Southern sorority woman could 250 00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:53,079 cast off the Southern esthetic when they wished to disassociate themselves from supposed Southern traits 251 00:19:53,119 --> 00:19:59,400 such as racist behavior. They hoped to distance themselves from women who advocated racial 252 00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:03,839 segregation and blatant racism, all the while continuing their work to keep African American 253 00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:08,079 women out of their chapters across the nation end quote. So when it came 254 00:20:08,119 --> 00:20:11,799 to picking new members and they didn't want to let black women in, their 255 00:20:11,839 --> 00:20:17,400 justification was, well, our sisters in the South might not like that, 256 00:20:17,759 --> 00:20:22,200 but we're not racist. I'm sharing this because it reminds me of what's going 257 00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:26,599 on today. Sororities are posting things like black Lives Matter, but then don't 258 00:20:26,599 --> 00:20:33,440 address the ways in which their organization actively upholds white supremacy. So they can 259 00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:37,160 decide that This is not a discriminatory organization when it's convenient to do so, 260 00:20:37,559 --> 00:20:41,880 but we need to remember that the goal is to be a top house and 261 00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:45,000 hit quota for this semester's recruitment. So if it takes little saving face, 262 00:20:45,519 --> 00:20:52,759 sororities will do it, especially on their instagram sororities take their instagrams very seriously, 263 00:20:53,200 --> 00:20:57,400 especially when it comes to recruitment. The following clip is from part of 264 00:20:57,400 --> 00:21:03,359 my interview with a former EP of recruitment. In terms of the instagram, 265 00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:07,559 we would do. You know, every stority does different posts for recruitment, 266 00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:11,519 so you have your open house posts, a cute post, always, esthetically 267 00:21:11,559 --> 00:21:15,680 pleasing, always. Everything that's posted has to go with the feed, has 268 00:21:15,720 --> 00:21:18,680 to be posted on, the story has to be cute, but it always 269 00:21:18,680 --> 00:21:21,920 had to get the approval of the recruitment team. I'm now going to read 270 00:21:21,920 --> 00:21:25,759 an email that was sent to Megan's five MEW chapter, and she is going 271 00:21:25,799 --> 00:21:29,640 to then read the rest of the email. Hello everyone, I just wanted 272 00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:33,799 to say that our pr is looking great so far. We've come a long 273 00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:37,920 way and I'm so excited to see where this goes. However, involvement from 274 00:21:37,079 --> 00:21:44,480 every in caps, every sister is important and expected. It's not only good 275 00:21:44,559 --> 00:21:47,880 for PR, but it's good for sisterhood as well. This looks good for 276 00:21:47,960 --> 00:21:52,519 PMMs two and whomever may be involved in follow recruitment. If a post is 277 00:21:52,599 --> 00:21:56,920 made, please like, comment, share, etc. On that post. 278 00:21:56,400 --> 00:22:00,599 This displays our love and excitement for our sisters in our chapter why we are 279 00:22:00,640 --> 00:22:04,039 so proud to be in Fine me, comment more and share the lot more. 280 00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:07,599 This is very important as P and m's have already begun to follow the 281 00:22:07,599 --> 00:22:11,039 page. We need to show them how loving and accepting of a sisterhood we 282 00:22:11,079 --> 00:22:15,599 are. I spoke with Taylor who explained to me how the sororities instagrams affected 283 00:22:15,599 --> 00:22:19,400 her while she was going through a recruitment as a P and M. Yeah, 284 00:22:19,400 --> 00:22:22,359 so instagram stories. I think that's the reason why I was so attracted 285 00:22:22,440 --> 00:22:27,359 to want to like stocking in their Instagram and seeing like t minus two weeks 286 00:22:27,400 --> 00:22:30,720 so I see my sisters and everyone in the comments like oh my god, 287 00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:33,079 you're so beautiful, I love you. You mean the world to be blah 288 00:22:33,079 --> 00:22:34,279 blah blah blah blah, and I was like wow, Like and they really 289 00:22:34,319 --> 00:22:38,119 pushed the whole like girl boss feminism, like joining sorority, like we're all 290 00:22:38,160 --> 00:22:41,759 empowered together and theirs grams world was like, oh my god, you're like 291 00:22:41,759 --> 00:22:44,480 your thoughts are valid, like you know, you're beautiable who you are. 292 00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:48,160 But everybody was really into the whole like girl boss like empowering thing. But 293 00:22:48,279 --> 00:22:52,559 also it was like dresses up to be at the knee or you are a 294 00:22:52,599 --> 00:23:00,000 horror. Something else that sororities post on their chapters social medias are there sisterhood 295 00:23:00,079 --> 00:23:07,079 videos, the classic sorority video that's used as promo before recruitment. I spoke 296 00:23:07,079 --> 00:23:11,160 with Alex, the former VP of recruitment, about this because she was in 297 00:23:11,279 --> 00:23:17,079 charge of making her chapter sisterhood video, and so sisterhood is all about let's 298 00:23:17,119 --> 00:23:19,000 show how close our chapter is and all the fun things that we do. 299 00:23:19,079 --> 00:23:22,799 Didn't think of it as like an Instagram real almost for a bunch of little 300 00:23:22,799 --> 00:23:27,920 clips are just thrown together and everyone's smiling and slow motion with happy music, 301 00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:33,279 holding hands and walking towards the sun. Watch how fun it is to live 302 00:23:33,319 --> 00:23:36,240 in the house. Look at all these silly times that we had watching the 303 00:23:36,240 --> 00:23:38,799 Bachelorette in the living room. Things that freshmen are being, like, you 304 00:23:38,839 --> 00:23:41,759 know, I want that, Look at us studying together. We're so smart. 305 00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:45,160 You're someone like in the chapter it's a cheerleader, like watch her do 306 00:23:45,240 --> 00:23:49,359 a flode. Yes, you're selling yourself. It's like you're the product and 307 00:23:49,480 --> 00:23:52,279 they want to be used. These are videos that we collect all year, 308 00:23:52,400 --> 00:23:56,720 where like give us videos that you just took of you all ice skating so 309 00:23:56,759 --> 00:24:00,519 that we can put them in the video for recruitment. Some of them are 310 00:24:00,519 --> 00:24:02,640 candid and some of them are real, but then you have the ones that 311 00:24:02,680 --> 00:24:04,440 are like, oh, let's do this for the video, right. Well, 312 00:24:04,480 --> 00:24:10,440 all videos are the exact same except for the fact that there's different members, 313 00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:15,240 so it's just a showcase their prettiest best members. Yes, and even 314 00:24:15,279 --> 00:24:19,559 like girls who talk in some of the videos, like they're usually asked the 315 00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:22,000 recruitment team knows would do well in front of a camera. Hey do you 316 00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:26,960 mind talking? You know and saying this little spield Sororities are very careful about 317 00:24:27,039 --> 00:24:33,200 which members they choose to put on their platforms. For example, I never 318 00:24:33,279 --> 00:24:37,240 made it to my Sororities Instagram. Not everyone makes the cut. Megan was 319 00:24:37,279 --> 00:24:42,680 telling me about how members of her chapter would submit photos, but not everyone 320 00:24:42,799 --> 00:24:47,720 would make it on the Instagram. I heard girls tried to submit pictures, 321 00:24:47,839 --> 00:24:51,440 but they were rejected because they didn't like fit the look. Most of these 322 00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:53,880 girls were like overweight or you know, didn't have like perfect terror makeup. 323 00:24:55,279 --> 00:25:00,240 And a presentation created by the National Office of Alpha FI, it states, 324 00:25:00,359 --> 00:25:07,920 quote the chapters social media must attract the target PNM, not reflect the chapter's 325 00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:14,319 current membership end quote. I spoke with Kirsten who provided an example that perfectly 326 00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:19,039 illuminates this notion. We had a photo shoot at one point, and I 327 00:25:19,119 --> 00:25:22,559 hosted on our Facebook group like, hey guys, we're having a photo shoot. 328 00:25:22,599 --> 00:25:29,240 Comment below who's coming. It'll be for our sorority catalogs. They sold 329 00:25:29,319 --> 00:25:32,480 shit on the side, and so we went. It was at the beach, 330 00:25:32,759 --> 00:25:37,240 and they put us in two different groups, and it was very obvious 331 00:25:37,319 --> 00:25:40,880 what they were doing. Was this a TLC. Yeah, for anyone who 332 00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:45,680 doesn't know, a TLC is a traveling Leadership consultant who was a volunteer and 333 00:25:45,799 --> 00:25:48,640 is being instructed by nationals. But we'll get to that in a later episode. 334 00:25:49,079 --> 00:25:55,799 They put the white and white passing girls in one category, and also 335 00:25:55,839 --> 00:26:00,079 like the thin girls that's important too, and then they put bigger girls and 336 00:26:00,160 --> 00:26:03,160 people of color, just in a different section, and so they took a 337 00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:07,319 picture of the former group, and so we were just sitting around because I 338 00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:11,559 was at the second group, and so we were just like waiting for someone 339 00:26:11,599 --> 00:26:14,079 to be like, Okay, it's your turn. So finally I asked I 340 00:26:14,119 --> 00:26:15,480 was just sitting at the beach for an hour. I asked them, I'm 341 00:26:15,519 --> 00:26:19,200 like, hey, should like we go home? Like are we gonna get 342 00:26:19,519 --> 00:26:22,559 pictures taken? Like what's the deal? And they were like, well, 343 00:26:22,599 --> 00:26:26,440 you guys all have phones, Like why don't you take pictures yourself? As 344 00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:30,839 if that was like an alternative to a professional photo shoot. And so we 345 00:26:30,839 --> 00:26:33,519 were in some of the pictures that they took from the boardwalk, where like 346 00:26:33,559 --> 00:26:37,519 you couldn't see people's identities and they like spelled out ZTA. But it was 347 00:26:37,559 --> 00:26:41,240 sad and it made me feel like shit. And I remember having a conversation 348 00:26:41,400 --> 00:26:45,359 with someone who's my friend at the time and I was like, hey, 349 00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:48,480 that was fucking racist, and she was like, Kirsten, you know what 350 00:26:48,519 --> 00:26:52,680 you signed up for when you joined this, Like this is a white centric 351 00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:56,599 world. We were guests in this world and we're lucky to be here. 352 00:26:56,839 --> 00:26:59,759 And that's just the way that we have to play this game. Gave me 353 00:26:59,759 --> 00:27:03,720 like a pit in my stomach because like she truly believes that. She truly 354 00:27:03,759 --> 00:27:08,079 believed that, like she was of a lower status because her skin was brown, 355 00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:14,119 and throughout her experience, like she just kept I hate to say that 356 00:27:14,160 --> 00:27:18,279 other like pocs are whitewashed, but like she made an attempt to like quote 357 00:27:18,359 --> 00:27:22,400 unquote being more white as time went on. She would wear her pearls, 358 00:27:22,440 --> 00:27:26,880 she would wear her like her Lily whatever, Lily who Lily peeled through but 359 00:27:26,119 --> 00:27:34,400 yeah, and wear the cardigans and like just being stereotypically white. It sounds 360 00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:38,599 to me like she was trying to emulate the Southern esthetic. And it's my 361 00:27:38,720 --> 00:27:45,160 hypothesis that the sorority did everything in their power to mold her into the closest 362 00:27:45,319 --> 00:27:49,319 version of a Southern lady like sorority member. I spoke with Angel, a 363 00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:56,559 black student from Sunny Genco who went through Zoom recruitment. Angel knew right from 364 00:27:56,599 --> 00:28:00,559 the start that as a black woman she would have to work ten times harder 365 00:28:00,640 --> 00:28:04,640 to emulate the Southern esthetic. In this rush event with fifty plus girls and 366 00:28:04,839 --> 00:28:11,519 there's maybe three black girls rushing, I'm already standing out when you're looking at 367 00:28:11,559 --> 00:28:15,000 the little grids of all these white girls, you're gonna look at me, 368 00:28:15,079 --> 00:28:18,480 and people's eyes are already gonna be on me. More so, I bought 369 00:28:18,519 --> 00:28:23,279 specific airrings and shirts, and I did my hair and my makeup so that 370 00:28:23,319 --> 00:28:26,920 way they look at me and they'll say like, oh, she's put together, 371 00:28:27,480 --> 00:28:33,759 she's well spoken, so I have a better chance of getting a bit. 372 00:28:33,119 --> 00:28:37,920 I'm already very whitewashed. I've been like made fun of that my whole 373 00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:41,000 life. They're like, oh, you have a valley girl voice, or 374 00:28:41,039 --> 00:28:45,119 like your voice is so white. You are a white girl chatted a black 375 00:28:45,160 --> 00:28:48,319 girl's body. So I already was kind of like, oh, I already 376 00:28:48,359 --> 00:28:52,640 kind of act like that. I dressed like pretty white, so I'll be 377 00:28:52,880 --> 00:28:57,440 fine. But I knew no matter what, I'd be looked at differently, 378 00:28:57,759 --> 00:29:06,400 and I definitely on the more polish version of myself. I definitely changed how 379 00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:08,759 I talked, Like if I talk a certain way about something like what if 380 00:29:08,799 --> 00:29:15,240 they think I'm yetto or like ratchet. It's always wondering will the sority want 381 00:29:15,359 --> 00:29:21,000 black girls or do they give bids to black girls. It's like a lot 382 00:29:21,039 --> 00:29:23,599 of that was constantly running through my mind, like, am I not going 383 00:29:23,640 --> 00:29:27,160 to get a bit because I'm black? Or like, is it actually because 384 00:29:27,359 --> 00:29:36,880 I don't fit the vibes of that sorority. In my interview with Alex, 385 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:41,279 the former VP of recruitment, I learned that not only are the social media's 386 00:29:41,359 --> 00:29:48,160 extremely curated, but also the sorority house itself needs to be carefully adjusted before 387 00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:52,559 the pmm's can even walk through the door. And it takes planning to be 388 00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:56,599 this calculated. For a recruitment that took place at the end of January, 389 00:29:57,160 --> 00:30:03,720 Alex had to start planning and November, you're planning decorations for four rounds. 390 00:30:03,960 --> 00:30:04,920 Here's the picture they're gonna be up on the walls. Here's the color that 391 00:30:04,960 --> 00:30:08,599 they're going to be backed by. Here's what our abroad board is going to 392 00:30:08,680 --> 00:30:14,240 look like. Here's what the pictures in the picture frames on kitchen walls are 393 00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:15,279 going to look like. This is the way the chairs are going to be 394 00:30:15,319 --> 00:30:19,000 set up. This is the decorations that we're going to pull from girls rooms. 395 00:30:19,079 --> 00:30:22,680 We'll take pieces of like you know, a cool light or a cool 396 00:30:22,720 --> 00:30:26,839 pair of shoes from a different room, and we'll put them in the room 397 00:30:26,839 --> 00:30:30,880 that girls are going to be recruited out of to like create whatever image we 398 00:30:30,920 --> 00:30:33,720 want. So half the stuff that's in someone's room when they're being recruited out 399 00:30:33,720 --> 00:30:37,799 of it isn't there. Like if someone had a cool light up star and 400 00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:41,680 light, like one of those like aluminum whatever, like super cool and artsy 401 00:30:41,720 --> 00:30:45,839 and trendy, We'll take it from another room, put it above the bed, 402 00:30:45,920 --> 00:30:48,920 run it on. We know. We'll take someone's jewelry and like strategically 403 00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:53,200 lay it out on the dresser. We'll take shoes and like you know, 404 00:30:53,240 --> 00:30:56,799 they're just a pair of shoes on the ground. But like everything that's there 405 00:30:56,880 --> 00:30:59,920 is purposely put there. And the girls who I was sent to do it, 406 00:31:00,359 --> 00:31:02,599 they knew what we wanted the image of our chapter to look like. 407 00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:11,039 I came home from like running errands, and I found that my room had 408 00:31:11,079 --> 00:31:15,759 been stripped apart and my room was full of nerdy shit. Like I went 409 00:31:15,799 --> 00:31:18,359 to Comic Con every year and I would buy like expensive collectibles like Game of 410 00:31:18,359 --> 00:31:22,799 Throne Ship and all of it was shoved in a corner. And that's like 411 00:31:22,920 --> 00:31:26,119 if you know, like that's expensive stuff, and like it was just some 412 00:31:26,200 --> 00:31:30,119 of it was completely damaged because it was just shoved in a corner because they 413 00:31:30,119 --> 00:31:34,599 didn't want people to know that someone like me is in that chapter. I 414 00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:37,720 actually have a friend I think she's actually going to be dropping soon who was 415 00:31:37,759 --> 00:31:41,519 in a top house in my school. It's Kyo. They wouldn't let her 416 00:31:41,559 --> 00:31:45,920 put up a bill and flag in her own room, and when she pushed 417 00:31:45,920 --> 00:31:56,200 her it, they took her out of recruitment. They've curated the house, 418 00:31:56,960 --> 00:32:01,640 they've curated their social media. Now they just need to ensure that their members 419 00:32:01,640 --> 00:32:06,640 are up to par Let's return to the look book that Megan shared with me. 420 00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:09,960 The look book states, please wear find you apparel the moment you get 421 00:32:10,000 --> 00:32:15,200 on campus. We want to represent our organization well. So don't go to 422 00:32:15,319 --> 00:32:20,599 events or to classes looking sloppy. Remember the two thirds rule. The thirds 423 00:32:20,680 --> 00:32:24,319 are outfit, makeup, hair. Please make sure before you leave to go 424 00:32:24,400 --> 00:32:29,039 to an event that at least two out of the three of these things are 425 00:32:29,160 --> 00:32:31,839 done well. So you have to do the two thirds rule for class? 426 00:32:32,000 --> 00:32:35,039 Yeah, oh yeah, you have to word to class or else you know 427 00:32:35,079 --> 00:32:37,799 you're gonna get a text like hay Gurley. Notice the two thirds rule wasn't 428 00:32:37,799 --> 00:32:42,880 really being followed today, even wearing masks. Yeah, most of us had 429 00:32:42,920 --> 00:32:45,839 like class online online, when you and your online zooms you have to do 430 00:32:45,920 --> 00:32:52,400 the two thirds rule. Oh yeah, I'm so worried about that. Also, 431 00:32:52,400 --> 00:32:54,799 I'd just like to point out right now that some of the frats have 432 00:32:54,880 --> 00:32:58,599 to do any of this if you wake up at eight am and your classes 433 00:32:58,599 --> 00:33:02,640 at eight oh five, just like just usually, we're supposed to show up 434 00:33:02,640 --> 00:33:07,319 a day before school starts to help move people in, so that you're like 435 00:33:07,359 --> 00:33:10,000 wearing your fine new shirt and you like help some freshman move in or be 436 00:33:10,000 --> 00:33:13,400 like, oh my god, like fine new girls. They're so helpful. 437 00:33:13,720 --> 00:33:19,039 We've got to join interesting tactic. Let's take a look at the outfit section 438 00:33:19,160 --> 00:33:22,960 of the look book and see what Megan's chapter was instructed to wear during recruitment. 439 00:33:23,640 --> 00:33:30,240 Preview Night ordered shirt medium, darkwashed jeans or overalls. Simple jewelry preferably 440 00:33:30,319 --> 00:33:37,720 gold, platforms or nice white shoes. And then Philanthropye Sister Knight white to 441 00:33:37,880 --> 00:33:42,599 blush to rose, dress romper or jumpsuit, chunky jewelry, silver, tan 442 00:33:42,680 --> 00:33:46,000 heels or flats. And then Prep Knight has black jumpsuit, romper or dress, 443 00:33:46,079 --> 00:33:51,799 pink heels or flats, pearls white. Duh, Like I don't have 444 00:33:51,920 --> 00:33:55,200 any of this shit like that costs so much money? And where do I 445 00:33:55,240 --> 00:33:59,279 get it? If I'm a plus sized girl? Where do I get if 446 00:33:59,319 --> 00:34:01,759 I'm like a tall girl. You have to get these outfits. Yeah, 447 00:34:01,839 --> 00:34:06,119 it's either fine or you just don't get to participate. This is all over 448 00:34:06,200 --> 00:34:08,760 Zoom. Nobody's going to see our pants. This is all over Zoom. 449 00:34:09,599 --> 00:34:14,400 Every outfit that a girl wore had to be approved, so we had outfit 450 00:34:14,480 --> 00:34:17,000 checks, so people would be pissed, and especially this year on Zoom, 451 00:34:17,159 --> 00:34:21,880 people aren't going to see my bottom half. And I am sitting there like, 452 00:34:22,039 --> 00:34:25,000 I don't even know how to fucking justify you buying a forty dollars pair 453 00:34:25,000 --> 00:34:28,400 of pants when you're not even going to see them. But you would still 454 00:34:28,440 --> 00:34:31,639 have to write. You would still have to because what if you take a 455 00:34:31,639 --> 00:34:36,039 picture and you post it, God forbid you post a picture of you wearing 456 00:34:36,079 --> 00:34:39,079 slippers in your recruitment outfit. What would not be appropriate if you had too 457 00:34:39,159 --> 00:34:44,679 much cleavand showing, if your dress was too sure, if it wasn't the 458 00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:50,320 right material. During one of the presentations the semester before recruitment, when they 459 00:34:50,360 --> 00:34:52,880 were talking about the outfits that is when they brought up everyone has to buy 460 00:34:52,920 --> 00:34:57,679 a pair of Sphinx and wear it underneath their dresses. They were afraid to 461 00:34:57,719 --> 00:35:00,239 say like the real reason, in my opinion, so they said it was 462 00:35:00,400 --> 00:35:06,559 to prevent lines, like unsightly lines that just would like not look good, 463 00:35:06,599 --> 00:35:09,400 like not polished. The word was always polished. You want to look polished. 464 00:35:09,719 --> 00:35:14,039 I love that word. Yeah. And also no one was allowed to 465 00:35:14,119 --> 00:35:16,280 wear their natural hair, so like, even if your hair is straight, 466 00:35:16,400 --> 00:35:20,719 like the PowerPoint explicitly said, like if your hair is already straight, you 467 00:35:20,719 --> 00:35:22,880 have to re straighten it, like everyone had to use heat on their hair. 468 00:35:23,199 --> 00:35:28,559 They showed us one power point during the actual meeting and then they sent 469 00:35:28,639 --> 00:35:31,320 out a more sanitized one in our email. So they took out the spanks 470 00:35:31,400 --> 00:35:34,800 thing because at the time I was like, I'm going to send this to 471 00:35:34,840 --> 00:35:37,519 all my friends nod in grape life. This is so fucked up. And 472 00:35:37,559 --> 00:35:39,159 then I went to find it in the power point that they emailed out and 473 00:35:39,159 --> 00:35:42,840 it was gone, so I was like, oh, they're good. And 474 00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:46,280 then the makeup, oh my god, makeup is non negotiable for recruitment. 475 00:35:46,320 --> 00:35:50,480 And when we definitely had a non binary member who was like I really don't 476 00:35:50,519 --> 00:35:52,440 like burning dresses or makeup, but I guess there's nothing I can do about 477 00:35:52,480 --> 00:35:57,480 it. When I became baby Recruitment, one of the things that I really 478 00:35:57,519 --> 00:36:01,360 wanted to focus on is like making the dress code more inclusive because from NATIONALS, 479 00:36:01,360 --> 00:36:05,079 we're told like, oh, you have to wear like this color this 480 00:36:05,199 --> 00:36:08,280 day, and it has to be like this specific outfit, Like you have 481 00:36:08,360 --> 00:36:14,920 to wear like a wine colored dress on pref night with gold heels, so 482 00:36:15,119 --> 00:36:19,320 essentially like once I became VP of Recruitment, I one of my first conversations 483 00:36:19,320 --> 00:36:22,119 with my alumni count of her, I was like, I want to change 484 00:36:22,239 --> 00:36:27,039 the dress code so you can wear a dress or a jump suit or like 485 00:36:27,079 --> 00:36:29,679 a shirt and pants, like whatever you're comfortable with, as long as it 486 00:36:29,679 --> 00:36:32,199 looks like professional and like it's with the vibe. It would make people more 487 00:36:32,239 --> 00:36:37,559 comfortable because we also have some non binary people in our chapter and they told 488 00:36:37,599 --> 00:36:42,639 me like they feel really uncomfortable wearing dresses sometimes. Once I talked to my 489 00:36:42,679 --> 00:36:45,320 alumni counterpart about that, she was like absolutely not, absolutely not, Like 490 00:36:45,360 --> 00:36:49,559 this is the way that our chapter has always done it, Like national says 491 00:36:49,599 --> 00:36:52,880 we have to wear dresses, so even when you want to change it. 492 00:36:52,280 --> 00:36:57,360 That doesn't mean that NATIONALS is going to let you change it, because remember, 493 00:36:57,719 --> 00:37:02,239 the VP of Recruitment is essentially an unpaid employee for the national organization and 494 00:37:02,400 --> 00:37:07,079 their job is to get a good pledge class and hit quota for that semester. 495 00:37:07,440 --> 00:37:13,480 Listen to what Alex's alumni advisor told her after her chapter hit quota and 496 00:37:13,559 --> 00:37:16,239 got a full pledge class. She said, awesome job, Alex. I'm 497 00:37:16,280 --> 00:37:20,400 so proud of your new member class. Hope you can do a repeat performance 498 00:37:20,480 --> 00:37:23,599 next year, as in, like, great job, you got enough girls, 499 00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:27,719 do it again next year. If you got the girls here, your 500 00:37:27,760 --> 00:37:29,840 job is done. You're perfect, you know. And they're gassing you up 501 00:37:29,880 --> 00:37:32,800 after and you have the whole chapter texting you you were amazing, you did 502 00:37:32,920 --> 00:37:36,400 so well, And in that moment, it's like, yeah, I fucking 503 00:37:36,480 --> 00:37:39,119 did. And then you look back and I'm like questioning half the things that 504 00:37:39,159 --> 00:37:44,519 I did behind the scenes. So while you may be questioning what you're doing, 505 00:37:44,880 --> 00:37:47,480 you figure out ways to cope. In my interview with Amanda's, she 506 00:37:47,519 --> 00:37:53,400 explained her chapter's reactions when the alumni advisor brought in someone to teach the members 507 00:37:53,440 --> 00:37:58,000 about how to do their makeup for recruitment. The only way that me and 508 00:37:58,559 --> 00:38:01,159 my friends met house deal with it. It's just laughing off because we all 509 00:38:01,199 --> 00:38:05,400 understand stood it. But it's like, you know, it's the same cessicism 510 00:38:05,480 --> 00:38:08,000 that every younger generation has. You're so bitter and pissed off, but you're 511 00:38:08,039 --> 00:38:10,320 just like, yeah, as we know that up, like fuck it, 512 00:38:10,480 --> 00:38:14,079 you know. And if you're if you're part of the hot girls club in 513 00:38:14,119 --> 00:38:16,800 the house, if you're if people are even marked as a non issue, 514 00:38:17,199 --> 00:38:22,480 you're going to lean into your egos thriving. And my mind certainly was yeah, 515 00:38:22,639 --> 00:38:28,119 I definitely had my moment of that too. Go back to season one 516 00:38:28,199 --> 00:38:31,599 and you'll hear all about it. But what if you're marked as an issue? 517 00:38:31,880 --> 00:38:37,599 What if you don't fit the Southern esthetic? We were all in the 518 00:38:37,719 --> 00:38:40,079 zoom call and they said more else, pretty pretty down. Some girls said 519 00:38:40,119 --> 00:38:43,599 a panic attack. Who wants to go around and say why you joined from 520 00:38:43,639 --> 00:38:45,960 you? That might make us feel better? So I said, I joined 521 00:38:45,960 --> 00:38:47,960 from you because I'm a queer woman and I'm kind of different, and I'm 522 00:38:47,960 --> 00:38:52,760 just really not sorority material. I'm like kind of a bigger girl. I'm 523 00:38:52,760 --> 00:38:55,119 different. I do tax it or me that's not usually something that like girly 524 00:38:55,199 --> 00:38:58,960 girls do. And you guys really accepted me for that. I felt really 525 00:38:58,960 --> 00:39:00,679 welcomed, and a lot of people, you know, they were like, 526 00:39:00,800 --> 00:39:02,239 you're great, I love you. Until one girl typed up and said, 527 00:39:02,320 --> 00:39:07,199 actually, we shouldn't say that to the potential new members because we don't want 528 00:39:07,199 --> 00:39:10,840 to be like the quirky odd ball sorority. That might not make them want 529 00:39:10,840 --> 00:39:15,599 to join. Residential Advisor. There somebody who was a member find me when 530 00:39:15,639 --> 00:39:17,639 they graduated, and she like didn't say anything, And I thought that surely 531 00:39:17,639 --> 00:39:21,880 the president is going to say something, or the recruitment chair, but instead 532 00:39:21,880 --> 00:39:23,559 they were like, yeah, no, you're totally right, Like please don't 533 00:39:23,559 --> 00:39:28,159 say anything about you being like quirky or like different, because that gives us 534 00:39:28,159 --> 00:39:31,840 a bad image. Very first day of recruitment came. We were all gathered 535 00:39:31,840 --> 00:39:35,880 in this girl's townhouse. Even though the girl who owned the townhouse we just 536 00:39:35,880 --> 00:39:37,639 got out of quarantine. We were still there anyway. We're all packed in 537 00:39:37,679 --> 00:39:40,960 there, no masks. When we started the zoom meeting, one girl like 538 00:39:42,000 --> 00:39:45,239 singled me out among like everybody to say here, like can you turn an 539 00:39:45,239 --> 00:39:47,320 a light? Like you know, you just need a little more light on 540 00:39:47,360 --> 00:39:52,000 your face. That was really embarrassing. And then we started recruitment and they 541 00:39:52,239 --> 00:39:54,719 interviewed all the girls and I was actually feeling pretty good. I was like, 542 00:39:54,719 --> 00:39:58,159 wow, like I did it. It's almost over. I can finally 543 00:39:58,159 --> 00:40:00,800 go back to the sleeping. At night, we're in the kitchen, you 544 00:40:00,840 --> 00:40:02,079 know, like laughing, and our president comes up and she's like, I 545 00:40:02,119 --> 00:40:05,760 need you to come talk to me. So she pulls me aside, just 546 00:40:05,800 --> 00:40:07,840 like a few feet away from everybody else, and she says, listen. 547 00:40:08,119 --> 00:40:12,400 The recruitment chair says that you aren't wearing enough makeup. And I was wondering, 548 00:40:12,599 --> 00:40:14,840 if you don't want to wear more makeup, maybe you could just turn 549 00:40:14,880 --> 00:40:16,920 off your camera. And I said what and she was like, yeah, 550 00:40:17,679 --> 00:40:22,800 we're trying to keep continuity among the girls and you're just not wearing enough, 551 00:40:22,880 --> 00:40:24,440 like, you know, like makeup. So if you don't want to do 552 00:40:24,440 --> 00:40:27,599 that, just just turn off your camera, okay. And I was like, 553 00:40:27,880 --> 00:40:30,559 you mean an eyeshadow, not wearing enough eyeshadow or what. She's like, 554 00:40:30,639 --> 00:40:32,199 yeah, like eyeshadow like foundation. I mean I can help you if 555 00:40:32,239 --> 00:40:35,320 you want. I'm really good at makeup. And I said, all right, 556 00:40:35,320 --> 00:40:38,000 I want out right now, and she said, just send me a 557 00:40:38,079 --> 00:40:40,559 letter saying that you want to leave, and I will approve it. And 558 00:40:40,599 --> 00:40:44,320 that's when I finally realized that I wasn't a part of Find You. I 559 00:40:44,440 --> 00:40:46,199 was something that find Me was trying to hide. So I left. I 560 00:40:46,320 --> 00:40:49,480 texted all my find You friends. I was like, guys, can you 561 00:40:49,519 --> 00:40:52,039 believe this? I can't believe I just got told to wear my makeup. 562 00:40:52,079 --> 00:40:53,119 I hear my camera, and I thought I was going to be met with 563 00:40:53,119 --> 00:40:55,039 like a lot of like, oh my god, reback. I can't believe 564 00:40:55,079 --> 00:40:59,360 that. I'm definitely going to go like write a letter or like report her, 565 00:40:59,639 --> 00:41:02,920 but a lot of like how dare you think that you're better than the 566 00:41:04,000 --> 00:41:07,360 rules here? Like you had expectations of you just wear more makeup. It 567 00:41:07,400 --> 00:41:08,360 was a lot of like I'll help you with their makeup. It's fine. 568 00:41:08,400 --> 00:41:12,960 But one girl was like, you're actually being super unfeminist right now, because 569 00:41:13,199 --> 00:41:16,559 feminism isn't the rejection of traditional beauty standards, and it's really empowering for us 570 00:41:16,559 --> 00:41:20,320 all to come together and look our best. If like you can't do that, 571 00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:22,039 then like maybe you just don't deserve to be in fund you. I 572 00:41:22,119 --> 00:41:24,079 cried a lot because at first I was like, oh my god, I'm 573 00:41:24,119 --> 00:41:27,280 so ugly. I still have a lot of trouble sleeping. I have a 574 00:41:27,320 --> 00:41:30,360 lot of nightmares, just like stress dreams were like, you know, it's 575 00:41:30,400 --> 00:41:34,519 time for recruitment and I don't have any dresses and I wake up in the 576 00:41:34,519 --> 00:41:37,599 cold sweat. But it's zoom all the time because of COVID, and a 577 00:41:37,639 --> 00:41:39,599 lot of professors are like, yeah, you have to turn on your camera 578 00:41:39,719 --> 00:41:44,519 for this class. And it was so hard after September ninth when all that 579 00:41:44,559 --> 00:41:46,239 went down, because I returned to the camera and I would see this girl 580 00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:51,480 who like she was pretty, but she wasn't pretty enough to not have makeup 581 00:41:51,519 --> 00:41:59,480 on recruitment can be detrimental to a woman's self esteem. And I applaud Megan 582 00:41:59,760 --> 00:42:04,440 for or sharing her experience. I also just want to point out how they 583 00:42:04,480 --> 00:42:08,559 flipped the blame onto her, the victim. You're the one that's the problem, 584 00:42:08,840 --> 00:42:14,199 Like, ignore all the abuse that just happened and replace it with the 585 00:42:14,239 --> 00:42:20,360 truth that is more convenient for the group and for recruitment, and it just 586 00:42:20,440 --> 00:42:23,719 leaves the victim feeling like shit and like it's their fault and leaves them with 587 00:42:23,920 --> 00:42:30,280 fucking nightmares and sometimes trauma. But in the sorority's mind, who gives a 588 00:42:30,400 --> 00:42:37,239 fuck? Because it's now the last round of recruitment, which means it's the 589 00:42:37,320 --> 00:42:43,320 chapter's last chance, the final push to recruit. It is too low cut. 590 00:42:43,320 --> 00:42:45,360 You need to go upstairs. The best ladies get in line, pledge 591 00:42:45,360 --> 00:42:50,360 class. Important that we're all reflected, ever, welcome back to our house. 592 00:42:51,280 --> 00:42:52,719 In the beginning round, it's a lot more like, you know, 593 00:42:52,719 --> 00:42:53,679 we're cutting girls they want to get rid of. In the last round, 594 00:42:53,679 --> 00:42:57,400 it's like partially on the chapter, but it's also on the piano. At 595 00:42:57,400 --> 00:43:00,239 that last round, you're really trying to sell yourself more than anything. You're 596 00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:05,159 trying to sell the chapter. You're trying to show this PNM, here's why 597 00:43:05,320 --> 00:43:07,199 you would love it here. And that's why I joined my chapter. You 598 00:43:07,199 --> 00:43:09,960 know, I was really unsure in the beginning. I did not want to 599 00:43:10,039 --> 00:43:14,000 join the chapter that I joined. They had a reputation that I didn't want. 600 00:43:14,199 --> 00:43:15,760 And that last round was kind of a push it over the edge for 601 00:43:15,760 --> 00:43:19,239 me because I felt a sense of comfort. The last round is the most 602 00:43:19,239 --> 00:43:22,519 intimate one, the most heartfelt. I mean, I cried every year. 603 00:43:22,920 --> 00:43:29,480 I found a podcast episode called the Process by the podcast Sorority Recruitment with Kate 604 00:43:29,559 --> 00:43:35,480 and Anna for fair use research reasons. Listen to how they discuss the last 605 00:43:35,559 --> 00:43:38,719 round. It's more of like a ritual kind of thing. And you go 606 00:43:38,760 --> 00:43:42,559 in, They're like, you don't have to cry, but you might cry. 607 00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:45,920 Yeah, like I bawled. Yeah, you're just confused onto what's about 608 00:43:45,960 --> 00:43:49,880 to happen and what they're gonna say. So yeah, it's honestly like a 609 00:43:49,880 --> 00:43:52,639 weird day, but it's also like really cool because it kind of just you 610 00:43:52,719 --> 00:43:55,440 just know which house like you want to be. And I went to Gainsai 611 00:43:55,519 --> 00:43:59,920 Beta and I baled my eyes out because their stores were just too relate. 612 00:44:00,679 --> 00:44:04,119 Yeah, too relable, I thought so too. I just like wanted to 613 00:44:04,119 --> 00:44:07,199 cry the whole time. I did, and then I felt like olymp I 614 00:44:07,239 --> 00:44:10,039 was like, oh my god, these people are gonna be like she's crying. 615 00:44:12,280 --> 00:44:15,360 Okay. I think they liked it. They hugged me when I left, 616 00:44:15,559 --> 00:44:21,119 and I was like, no, I don't want to leave. But 617 00:44:21,360 --> 00:44:23,960 I mean, like I would say that, like it's like a mutual process 618 00:44:24,039 --> 00:44:29,199 throughout the whole thing. But I feel like preference Day is really the day 619 00:44:29,239 --> 00:44:31,920 that like you pick them and then like like they want you, they want 620 00:44:31,960 --> 00:44:35,000 you, know, they let you know if they want you or not. 621 00:44:35,719 --> 00:44:38,400 They're not supposed to. But yeah, when I was at PNM, this 622 00:44:38,519 --> 00:44:43,960 happened to me too. In the last round, the sister rushing me told 623 00:44:44,000 --> 00:44:49,000 me that I was in they want me. And this was minutes after I 624 00:44:49,039 --> 00:44:52,840 watched an intimate chapter ceremony. Listen to what Alex says about the last round 625 00:44:52,840 --> 00:44:55,559 ceremony. It is the round with like the singing, and you know, 626 00:44:55,599 --> 00:44:59,280 you got to teach everyone the songs. Who's on the harmonies, who has 627 00:44:59,280 --> 00:45:01,440 to fake sing because they don't have a good voice. The speeches are about 628 00:45:01,480 --> 00:45:06,360 like our story, here's why we join the chapter. There's one speech that 629 00:45:06,360 --> 00:45:08,360 someone does every year. Dear Future blah blah blah. I was in your 630 00:45:08,400 --> 00:45:12,800 shoes once, you know, as in you the sister speaking to the PNM. 631 00:45:12,920 --> 00:45:16,280 So it's like, dear Future Alpha Phi or dear Future Triedell, dear 632 00:45:16,320 --> 00:45:20,599 future blah blah blah. I know the confusion that you're feeling right now, 633 00:45:21,039 --> 00:45:23,039 dear future blah blah blah. And you're jumping back and forth from person to 634 00:45:23,159 --> 00:45:27,199 person, and it's like when you're sitting there as a P and M, 635 00:45:27,239 --> 00:45:30,199 You're like, oh my god. They're literally speaking to me, like, 636 00:45:30,480 --> 00:45:32,679 oh my god, I can't wait to have that one day. It's like, 637 00:45:32,960 --> 00:45:37,119 dear future, blah blah blah, you'll find your bridesmaids here, just 638 00:45:37,159 --> 00:45:39,440 like I found mine, Dear future, blah blah blah. I didn't know 639 00:45:39,519 --> 00:45:45,079 my roommate until pref of my freshman year, and look how far we've come. 640 00:45:45,360 --> 00:45:50,480 And it's just like you're selling the emotion. The sororities propaganda prevents the 641 00:45:50,559 --> 00:45:57,679 recruit from examining the sororities actual practices and history. The pnm's critical thinking ability 642 00:45:57,800 --> 00:46:05,880 can't help but be overwhelmed with all these testimonials and emotionally arousing information. According 643 00:46:05,920 --> 00:46:10,360 to Terror, Love and Brainwashing by Alexandra Steyne, cult recruitment is primarily the 644 00:46:10,400 --> 00:46:17,960 result of situational vulnerabilities, not personality vulnerabilities. So for example, people might 645 00:46:19,119 --> 00:46:23,159 be drawn in through friendship networks. All of my friends were in Greek Life. 646 00:46:23,280 --> 00:46:25,679 We were all in classes together, and like if they're all ones I 647 00:46:25,760 --> 00:46:29,840 knew and really ling out with them. I didn't have a lot of friends 648 00:46:29,920 --> 00:46:34,280 really, just my first year. They were always busy with like Greek life 649 00:46:34,280 --> 00:46:36,559 events, and I thought, well, if I joined, we can have 650 00:46:36,679 --> 00:46:37,639 it all the time because we're going to be both a part of the same 651 00:46:37,639 --> 00:46:45,320 sorority. I didn't know anyone at JMU, and I was kind of influenced 652 00:46:45,320 --> 00:46:50,000 by the girls in my freshman dorm, like they were all rushing, and 653 00:46:50,320 --> 00:46:53,079 I didn't want to be the only one who wasn't rushed me If I was 654 00:46:53,119 --> 00:46:57,679 the new freshman, I wanted to make friends. I wanted to find my 655 00:46:57,800 --> 00:47:01,119 people, and a lot in my mat and sweetmates for wresting, so I 656 00:47:01,159 --> 00:47:07,000 thought why not or they might be expected to join through familial ties. My 657 00:47:07,079 --> 00:47:12,119 mom was in a sorority, dad using a fraternity, my sister was in 658 00:47:12,159 --> 00:47:14,920 a sorority. I ended up joining the sorority that my sister was in. 659 00:47:15,119 --> 00:47:19,079 It was just an expectation from my family and from growing up with everybody in 660 00:47:19,159 --> 00:47:22,159 my hometown that I would go through Rush and that I would join a sorority. 661 00:47:22,199 --> 00:47:25,079 So my mom was in Greek life, and my aunt and all of 662 00:47:25,280 --> 00:47:29,239 my mom's family, and so I felt a lot of pressure, like at 663 00:47:29,360 --> 00:47:32,599 family bought mitzvahs and family events where people would be asking what sorority are you? 664 00:47:32,639 --> 00:47:37,000 Going to Rush and then being a first year student at a huge state 665 00:47:37,039 --> 00:47:38,880 school and not knowing what the hell you want to do with the rest of 666 00:47:38,880 --> 00:47:45,960 your life. Stein states that another situational vulnerability is being an a normal life 667 00:47:45,039 --> 00:47:52,400 transition like a recent move to attend university, a divorce or other relationship breakup, 668 00:47:52,599 --> 00:47:54,920 a death in the family, and a change of job or a housing 669 00:47:55,199 --> 00:48:00,440 So in the case of who was being recruited in sororities in fraternity is it's 670 00:48:00,639 --> 00:48:05,360 eighteen year old freshmen that just got to college and are seeking a community, 671 00:48:05,559 --> 00:48:10,679 and then the sorority or frat swoops in and promises you exactly that Greek package 672 00:48:10,679 --> 00:48:15,880 steps beautifully for me where I'd like it was very much. So this offers 673 00:48:15,920 --> 00:48:21,199 me a solution to all of the concerns I have being alone into Bay Area, 674 00:48:21,280 --> 00:48:24,840 and the sororities are literally trained on how to sell it to you in 675 00:48:24,920 --> 00:48:31,199 a perfectly crafted elevator pitch of all the amenities and privileges you'll get when joining 676 00:48:31,400 --> 00:48:36,960 their marketing geniuses. I can't fight this advertising like this is great. They're 677 00:48:36,960 --> 00:48:39,280 giving me all of the things I need. I'll fucking just drop the money 678 00:48:39,280 --> 00:48:45,559 on it. However, no one is joining with informed consent. The PMMs 679 00:48:45,559 --> 00:48:51,800 are never made aware about how calculated and curated this shit all is. That 680 00:48:51,880 --> 00:48:57,360 there's fucking training for this, and they're certainly not made aware of the racist 681 00:48:57,440 --> 00:49:05,159 recruitment practice that's being used rank them all behind the scenes, But they're about 682 00:49:05,199 --> 00:49:14,639 to find out next week on Snapped. Snapped, we've been waiting for you 683 00:49:14,800 --> 00:49:20,679 all winter, and we're so glad you're finally here. Thank you so much 684 00:49:20,719 --> 00:49:23,119 for listening to this episode. For all the updates and to be part of 685 00:49:23,119 --> 00:49:30,320 the conversation, please follow at Snaps the podcast on Instagram and TikTok. Please 686 00:49:30,440 --> 00:49:34,679 rate, review, subscribe, share this episode to your Instagram story, and 687 00:49:34,760 --> 00:49:38,159 send it to your sorority sisters. Because there's no network behind Snapped, the 688 00:49:38,199 --> 00:49:43,199 biggest thing that we can do to get this out there is to spread the 689 00:49:43,239 --> 00:49:47,199 word. To learn more about Margaret Freeman and her incredible book, Woman of 690 00:49:47,239 --> 00:49:52,079 Discriminating Taste, visit Margaret L. Freeman dot com. If you're interested in 691 00:49:52,119 --> 00:49:57,480 sobrity history, you need to buy yourself a copy of Freeman's book. Last, 692 00:49:57,480 --> 00:50:01,599 but not least, you can follow me on Instagram and Twitter at Lucy 693 00:50:01,679 --> 00:50:06,440 jt Underscore. Please let me know what you thought of this episode. I 694 00:50:06,599 --> 00:50:23,599 love to connect with y'all. Why why why why