But let me ask you this done in the meantime. You are in Hell,
so who would be your roommates? So if it's actually hell and the
premises I'm there for purposes of eternal torment, it would be Pat Robertson,
Like, no questions asked, because like I have one and have nothing in
common with the man. But also he's just he is he is the devil
in Cardiate, like if the devil is real, he exists as Pat Robertson
did on Earth. So I don't yeah that Pat Robertson probably would be my
pick for this particular problem. Last week we asked you are in Hell and
who is your roommate? I was excited to see what the answers of this
one would be, and I think there's some pretty good ones here. So
let's read our top three answers from last week. Number three is from mister
Colby the Second, who says, my roommate is Eddie van Halen and turn
it up to eleven would be ten times better than listening to hims all day
and night in heaven, which is true. I mean, like it seems
like all the cool people do go to Hell. I don't know, do
you agree with that, Richard, do you think that's yeah? More interested
in having Steve I though, because he did the guitar work for the film
Crossroad, which was all about the devil someone selling the soul to the devil
to become a great guitar player. So I'd personally choose Steve I over Eddie
van Halen. But great, you know you always make deals with the devil?
Can we make deals with God? Is that a thing too? I
don't know. Is there some sort of exchange that could be made? I
don't know. That's for theologians to decide. But number two comes from Diana
Bender, who says, I am in hell and my roommate is Mother Teresa.
Oh, that would be really bad to have Mother Teresa as a room.
She'd probably be very like. She'd probably just like curse you out if
you did anything that she didn't like. You know, she'd probably be really
mad at stuff. I don't know. It probably would be a fun time,
especially if you were ill. She'd just encourage you to embrace so for
involved with them giving you a medicine. That's a good point. If she
saw you burning, she's like, oh, you just need to embrace it.
It's like a good thing, and I would be like, no,
that's not true. I need a tile at all, at least if I'm
burning, probably do bore, but at least that number one comment that comes
from R. C. Blazer, who says, nobody tell God, but
I am definitely afraid of Audrey Hepburn, my roommate, And now's like really
great, like, oh no, not Audrey hepber and anybody but her,
like, yeah, that's pretty funny. Wrong answers only get the ball rolling
here? For is Jamie? Why is God hiding from us? Because if
we ever find him, he got some splaining to do. Yes, oh
my goodness, yeah, he's I'll have to ask our forgiveness. And I'll
piggyback on that and say because he's a big fan of Hide and Seek and
wants to be the best, I don't know, the very best, very
best. So last week we asked you wrong answers only, why is God
hiding from us? And our top three answers were pretty good. So in
third place from this past week was Jay ray Reddin says, don't predators always
hide from their prey? Which this is a great one seeing as kind of
what we're what we're going to be talking about in a little bit. But
what are your thoughts on this one? Christy? I mean it hits.
I appreciate a little bit of snark early in the day, like at the
beginning of the broadcast. I'm here for it. And number two is Jason
Katz that says God isn't hiding, he just goes to a different universe in
Canada, you wouldn't know him. Solid work. I love this one.
Your girlfriend in Canada that you right, she couldn't come. She's busy modeling.
She could make it to this middle school dance. Yeah, I promise
she's absolutely real. Just she lives in Canada and goes to a different school
and all that. And in first place, we have Scottish hear saying why
is God hiding from us? He owes Mary two thousand years and child support
he holy ghosted her. There are a multiple multitier joke, right like there
are multiple puns in here. And I love this. Any of the thoughts
on this one only that this is great work and I really appreciate everything that
the audience puts together on these This has been a really fun segment for the
last several months, so this week's prompt is what is an inappropriate thing to
say at a religious funeral? Now? This is this is this is a
spicy one. Yeah. I don't even know. I don't even know if
I have a good answer for this, but I think you had a really
good one for this. What would you say is an inappropriate thing? They
had a religious funeral? He has written, Oh, that's so bad,
it's so bad. I don't know. I can't I can't be bad.
I can't think of anyone for this. But we won't know what you guys
think, so leave a comment below. Last week's question we asked was what
is inappropriate to say at a religious funeral? This was a hot question to
ask. Was a little nervous about some of the responses, but we have
our top three responses for you here. Number three comes from our URL turner,
who says, sorry, that's our E turner. My contexts are not
in right again, and I gotta work with that. But anyway, it
says inappropriate thing to say at a religious funeral. I'm sure he's down below
screaming up at us, which is really I know old. That's an old
George Carlin reference, is it George Carlin. That sounds like George Carlin thing.
Okay, all right, I'm knocking off points for stealing from George Carlin.
But you know what, maybe George Carlin is screaming up at us,
telling us we're stealing his jokes. So regardless of that. Number two comes
from Kirkin M who says, inappropriate thing to say to Christian funeral. We
are gathered here today on this joyous occasion to celebrate the passing of the deceased.
May we all join him soon? Which is very funny. I don't
I like that one. Number one comes from Veranda Rensberger, who also had
the number three and number one comment on Truth Wanted the other day. By
the way, it said inappropriate thing to say at a religious funeral. Let's
give it three days and see if it takes. Which is awesome, well,
very good. These are great answers. These are better than I was
very afraid of the answer to the question last week, but we ended up
getting some really good one for you. The prompt for next week is name
a lesser known reason why God smites people. So please answer your question below
in the video comments section, and next week we will reveal the top three
answers. But before I move on, Emma, what do you think what
is what will be a lesser known reason why God smites people? Do you
know any yeah? Oh it was so many swiping tender in church, swiping,
oh, swiping tender in church. Just a good one, oh man.
Yeah, but what if you're like looking for your I know a very
devout Christian man who met his wife on tinder. Oh it's allowed, yeah,
just not in church. Just not in church. Okay, okay,
that's fair. That's fair because that's like, that's the holy time, you
know what I mean. You don't want to be having in pure thoughts?
Well no, no, no, no, no, you go wife hunting
when church is over right, right right, You've got to find your tinderrella
outside of the Big Man's house. The question was what are some of the
lesser known reasons for God to smite somebody? So our number three favorite answer
is from Christopher Brazinski smiting shall happen for putting ketchup on steak. I think
that's fair. I think that's fair. Butt. How about you? Yeah,
you know that is a crime against humanity, putting ketchup on a state.
But you know, one of our other hosts, Katie Montgomery would say,
probably even along the same lines as putting Mayo on anything, which I
wholeheartedly disagree with that. Yeah, let's let's not get carried away with the
smiting because Mayo is delicious. Absolutely, we are pro Mayo here today,
and Katie can go back and watch this later and tell us we're wrong in
the comment section. Well, glad to know we're on the same team.
Are our number two favorite answer this week came from Loki twenty two forty uh
lesser known reason of God smites people putting the toilet paper roll so it unrolls
from the back. I agree with this one. Yeah. I have never
understood the toilet paper debate. It's right up there for me with like pineapple
on pizza, Like it's been it's been discussed, it's been done. I
don't understand why everybody's so upset about You think it you don't care which way
the toilet paper roll goes or are you saying that there? Yeah, I
feel like I can work it out. No, I can work it out
one way or another. Like if there is toilet paper presents, so long
as it's not wadded up on the floor and let's be honest sometimes even that
Yeah, okay, So, I mean I disagree with you a little bit
because I think that there is an objectively correct answer here, and it is
so that the role opened towards you. Good to peak a little bit at
your moral philosophy. I hope we have some callers interested in challenging how you
got to that answer. I mean, how do you know, Ben,
Yeah, we all do some street epistemology about my toilet paper preferences. That's
coming next. Well, and our favorite answer this week came from guidos Uh.
He says that the best way, or one lesser known way to be
smited by God is just asking people who made God. It invites a smiting
because God hates it. When Christians start to think this is this is true,
this is absolutely true. Our prompt for this week is write a slogan
for Satan. Yeah, what do you got? We're looking for best answers
in the comments section. How about for you from you? So if I
was if I was Satan's campaign manager, the slogan would be the lesser of
two evils. I mean, you know, I think it pretty much right.
You know, when when you look at the records of the candidates.
Yeah, let's raid go. Hey, Satan hasn't genocided anybody that I'm aware
of. No, that goes a long way, clean hands. Yeah,
And last week we asked you to write us logan for Satan, and we
have three amazing answers here. So in third place, our answer from Grace
Gordon says, great slogan for Satan is God sins, which I really I
want to see maybe if this ended up on one of our fancy limited edition
T shirts. I think that would be absolutely hilarious. Yeah, it's nice
and snoppy and short as well. Will like that one. Yeah. Number
two is from Belter glj. Their slogan for Satan is murdered way fewer people
than God, which it's funny and also it's like it's like funny in a
very true way that you're like, yeah, it's like I'm laughing, but
I also feel bad that I'm laughing at that. And number one from Sydney
Raptor slogan for Satan worship me or go to Heaven, And that's you know,
that's also funny kind of a true way. What are your thoughts on
those? Yeah, I think that last one's I think it's really funny because
depending on how you picture heaven, and of course different people, different believers
picked to it in different ways. But if you kind of take the theological
representation that you're just going to be praising God for eternity, I think I'd
rather be sat at the barbecue downstairs, if I'm honest, rather than doing
that, because that sounds really really tedious and boring and forever. It's an
exceptionally long long time. Well, Ryan answers, only, when God looked
down on his creation, he saw it was blank. Okay, so that's
the prompt for this week. Let us know when Ryan answers, only,
when God looked down on his creation, he saw it was blank. Leave
your comments below. We'll pick the top three and we'll read them for next
week and it should be a good time. But before I move on,
Jamie, what do you think? Well, I think that God looked down
at his creation and saw that he hadn't gone through enough testing. But if
he threatened or at least bribed the users enough, then they probably wouldn't complain.
And last week we asked you, God looked down on his creation and
so it was blank. So the top three answers were Number three, Rage
of Heaven. When God looked down on his creation, he said, oops,
one, Ben, what do you think of that? Oh, that's
that's a great one. And you know, if you've seen some of the
shorts that I've been part of on this channel, that's how I think God
probably would respond to most of the human body and other animals that he's created,
because it's pretty messed up. Yeah, absolutely is. Number two is
Jordan Moore Question of the Week. God looked down on his creation, and
so it was horney that. I mean, not so much of my age,
but certainly in many many cases you younglings, Ben, I'm sure you're
Horney all the time. Oh yeah, and people here know that I'm a
trans guy, and so the I can tell you testosterone does make a difference
in how horny you are, so thrown out out there, and yeah,
I'm pretty sure that's why God had to put the restrictions on what you can
do with your body, because he knows he made you to be horny,
and then it's just like now you can't do anything about it. Sorry.
Number one was is it is brain dead or maybe not be brainded? But
that is their Monica. When God looked down at his creation, he said
the following seven point eight out of ten too much water. Earlier, we've
taken a few calls about that one over the years, haven't we been?
Yeah, Yeah, for sure. Yeah. So this week we would like
to know if you had your own circle of hell, what would the punishment?
So, sim if you had your own circle of Hell, what what
would go on there? Would it? Would it be fun? That's what
I was thinking about this question, And I was like, Okay, do
they mean for you know, do you mean for it to be like something
that's actually like awful and torturous? Or like what if I was the designer,
what I would do? Because I think my circle of Hell would basically
be like just the biggest queer orgy ever, like of all so all of
us, you know, queer souls like got sent to Hell. We would
just be you know, fucking all the wh all ever, every single one
of us. But the thing what makes it hell for the evangelicals who are
definitely getting sent there is that they have to watch and participate the queer orgy.
So so last week we asked, if you had your own circle of
Hell, what would your punishment be So these are awesome and I am excited.
Number three, Chuck Gato says, in my circle of hell, in
my circle of heaven, you get to toast marshmallows. My circle of hell
is the same place, but you are a marshmallow. That's pretty intense.
Honestly, I don't know about that. I think I would take being a
marshmallow just by itself. Maybe not the toasting. Number two we've got from
Blake Walker. My circle of hell would be having everybody sit on clouds,
playing harps and singing praises to yahweh for all eternity. Yeah, I agree
with that. Yeah, that does not sound like a good time. And
finally, number one for last week, we've got Marcel Janssen's says version of
hell where you actually have to read the software user agreements you checked? Okay
on now, that is diabolical, Marcel, that is diabolical. I I
yeah, If that is what hell is, I might convert folks. I
might. I'm not an infinite in hell. Yeah, right, Hey,
some of those user agreements do feel like their eternity, Like, how do
you pack that much? It doesn't matter, We're not gonna do it.
We're not gonna Here is this week's question. If you haven't answered for it,
comment below. It is what is a little known reason God sends people
to hell? So go ahead and answer well in the comment section, not
the live check comment section, and we will reveal the top three answers.
But before we do that, what do you think is a lot of no
reason? No? I don't claim to be a gnostic in many ways,
but I know this one thing. There is a special place in hell for
people who say the words I could careless when they mean that they couldn't care
less. Yeah, you know that. That is, you know, a
grammatical trope that I often fall into as well. But there aren't enough German
suplexes in the world for these people. Well, I mean, I don't.
I don't know. If you want to superlex me. If I do
that today, you're more than welcome to. But I'm not avoid or I'm
a bleeder. Yeah, yeah, I get you. I don't know.
When I'm thinking of this, I'm thinking of people who, like you know,
don't wash out, or people who don't put recycling in the recycling and
then put it in the trash instead. And to be fair, again,
that's something. Sometimes it's all but it's like, oh, that's such a
little thing. I think. You know, if there's enough of people like
you, then the whole system doesn't work. So last week we asked you
what is a little known reason God sends people to hell? Number three was
polypockets. What is a little known reason God sends people to hell? There's
a special place in Hell for people who right, you're an idiot? Why
or you are in comment sections on social media? Then what's your opinion on
that one? I like that. First of all, this person's name is
poly Park, which is awesome. And I like how they're commenting about specific
places in Hell in which people should go to because of their lago grammar.
But like what they're what if, like English is in their first language or
something. You know, there has to be there has to be some sort
of tiered system there. That's all I'm saying. You know, it's heered
system. Indeed, I like that. Number two is Christine c blocking a
parking space or scratching someone's car because one is too lazy to return. There's
shopping carts. Definitely a reason for hell for those people. It's true,
like you, if you think about you know people's ability to be compassionate to
each other. A shopping cart is the greatest example because it's absolutely no cost
to you make maybe extra five ten seconds of your time, and like that.
That should be the arbiter by which you're a good person or not is
if you put your shopping cart up. So I'm alright with that absolutely.
Number one is averts a love, a little known reason God sends people to
hell pouring milk in a ball and then pouring this serial. I object to
this, Okay, I say, don't knock it until you try it.
Okay, the cereal tastes different when you do that. I'm not saying I
do that every time. I'm just saying you got to mix it up.
It's about the spice of life, Richard. You got to mix things up
every once in a while. It's not something I have tried. I've always
put my cereal first. Maybe I'll have to tempt sit and to send me
to heule by it by doing the But I need to know Ben's answers to
this question, so complete the sentence. Ben, I know we aren't intelligently
designed because and I have wagh too many answers for this one So I'm going
to pick one of my favorites, and that is the human skull. So
if we imagine God creating human and just just imagine this thought process going on
in his mind of you know, I need to give humans an organ that
controls all their other organs, probably the most important organ in their bodies.
So I'm going to give them a brain, and I need something to protect
this brain. So, okay, we're going to put a giant cage of
armor around this brain. Cool. Great, sounds sounds like a great plant.
So how does it stay in the skull. Well, we're not going
to hold the brain down with any like ligaments or anything like we do with
other structures in the human body. We're just gonna let it float freely in
water and just hope it suspends properly. Okay, cool. So then what
if somebody is moving too fast and that fluid moves around and then the brain
moves around in the skull. No, No, that's fine, don't worry
about it. So shouldn't we pad the inside of the skull then, so
that when the if the brain hits the side, that it won't be damaged.
No, No, I'm actually going to put spikes in the front of
it, so that if the brain moves, it's going to run into those
spikes. Great plant, Absolutely, great plant. And this is how we
get concussions, everybody. Concussions are God's fault. Last week we asked you
complete the sentence I know we aren't intelligently to because and now we're gonna show
you our top three answers. So number three from less than Lucid says,
we know the human body isn't intelligently designed because humans are chock full of anxiety.
And that's true. We're like anxious about a lot of stuff. Basically
a clear plastic bag full of vanilla pudding and anxieties. Vanilla putting in anxiety.
That that Yeah, that's a good way to sum it up. So
yeah, that's that's one reason that we can consider. But we also have
two other ones. We got our number two answer from Craig Thompson, who
says we are not intelligently designed because we have to cut the tip of our
pens off. So you know that's that's true. I'm do we I mean,
yes, I don't know. To be honest, it's been a while
since I do a lot of stuff in the computer. I don't really,
I don't really do that. So that's that's that's, you know, I
don't. I don't talk about pens anyway. That's a joke. But yeah,
so that's that's another way to think about this. But renumber one answer
comes from Seenalt, who says, we know the human body is not intelligently
designed because hang on, I'll finish this post after I clean my glass.
So yeah, there is that. Yeah, I'm sure that does. I'm
sure that does. I'm like having contact issues right now too, so I
might join you in the in the blind department today, at least for one
of my eyes, because I also have very terrible vision. This week's prompt
is going to be headline a Bible story using Florida Man. I'm gonna be
honest, this may be like one of the top five best prompts we've done.
We need really good answers from you guys. Okay, so headline a
story using Florida man in your comment this week, and we might read it
out for next week and pick the top three answers. Do you have a
good headline for this prompt? A Floridamon. A Floridamon in Exodus would be.
I just had this image of God and Moses doing all the hard work
freeing everybody from slavery, getting them out of Egypt, getting to the border
of Egypt, and Florida man just say no, we're going to build a
wall. You can't come in. You've got to stay in Egypt and remain
slaves. Well, yeah, I think, yeah, it's something I was
thinking, like maybe the story of Sampson or something like Florida man breaks down
local buildings after hair growth or something something like that. Last week's question of
the Week was a headline a Bible sorry, a headline made from a Bible
story using Florida Man. In the number three spot, we have Florida Man
gets so high he hears a donkey talk. It's a real Bible story,
y'all. It's a real Bible story. And remember answers and Genesis has a
whole page about how that donkey really did talk. They teach kids that.
And then number two, we've got Florida Man after leaving Sodom and Gomorrah gets
high on wife salts. Another real Bible story, y'all. A woman's home
was burning to the ground and she looked at it and she got turned into
a pillar of salt, and her family couldn't even turn around to look at
her and grieve, otherwise they might be turned into pillars of who knows what
spice. And then we've got number one headline, Florida man gets eaten by
a whale, says he plans on staying to avoid the Florida heat. We
can understand that one. That one's all good. We want the truth,
so watch Truth Wanted live Friday at seven pm Central. Visit tiny dot cc,
slash y t tw and call into the show at five one two nine
nine nine two four two, or connect to the show online at tiny dot
cc slash call tw