Hey, Hey, I'm back with something for you to think about. Lowering
your standards are no standards at all. I have to be real with you
these days and times, I don't know if people have any standards. I
can't tell, can you. Oh my goodness, the things people settle for
these days. It is a shame. It's a shame. People are so
desperate. But the crazy part is they try not to act desperate, or
let me say, let me say this. They try to pretend as if
they're not desperate, but they're desperate. You can do whatever you want to
do in this world and fake along the way, but sooner or later,
the truth of who you are is gonna come out. People don't understand that.
They always show who they are in their actions. What you do or
what you don't do, you show who you really are. Lowering your standards
or no standards at all. In my opinion, one is no better than
the other, and that is what's wrong with so many people in the world
today. No standards. You get into relationships based on the wrong things,
and you keep doing it over and over. You keep doing the same things,
making the same bad choices and the decisions, and getting the same results.
Duh, what you think is gonna happen. People are so focused and
caught up in self that they do not understand that what they're doing is causing
and pain in their own lives, self inflicted pain because of their poor choices
and decisions. People only treat you how you allow them to treat you.
People treat you how you have taught them to treat you. They don't care
if you don't care, why should they. So many of you get into
relationships for the wrong reasons with the wrong people. Sometimes you know they're the
wrong people, but just keep going forward. I don't know what people think
they're gonna get. You think you're gonna get a goal nugget out of a
cup a dirt. No, And that may have not made sense to people,
but you're not going to produce a good product from a bad product.
The only way that will happen both individuals have to change, and a lot
of times that just don't happen. That is the problem with most people.
They get into relationships hoping people change. They're hoping people change, wishing people
change. Some of you pray people change, but you have no relationship with
God. But you're praying for that it makes no sense. It really does
not. In order to have standards, you have to know and love yourself.
If you don't love yourself, you will never understand what love is.
Therefore, if you don't know what it is, I always told you,
you won't know what it isn't and because of that, you will allow and
accept anything in your life in the name of love. And I've told you
many, many, many times. People love based on their own feelings,
their own feelings, meaning, listen carefully. It's all about how you feel.
It's about how you feel, what you want, what you desire.
I always tell you this because think about it. If it was really based
on the other individual, if it was really truly based on the other individual,
you probably could see more clear what's going on in the relationship, because
most times relationships are one sided. Therefore, the other individual is showing you
who they are by the way they're treating you, they're speaking to you,
they're taking you for granted, and this and that. That is showing you
who they are. But when you're caught up in your own in the world,
your own feeling, your own whatever, all you can see is how
you're feeling, what you want, what you desire. You're not taking notice
to what you're getting. And for many people, they get into these relationships
blindly because, like I said, you don't know yourself, you don't love
yourself, and when you don't, you have no standards, or your standards
are so very low. And that's also why many of you have no requirements.
You let people do you any kind of way. Your significant others treat
you any kind of way, and you have no consequences. You don't require
things of them. Some of you are working your fingers to the bone,
but your significant other is not lending a hand in any kind of way.
That's because you have no requirements none. Some women they're the mother and the
father and the man is right there. But that's because she has not placed
any requirements on him. So he do what he wants to do while she's
doing it all. And don't think for a second that that does not go
both ways, because sometimes it does. Sometimes it's the men who are doing
everything. They're working outside of the house, they're coming home, taking care
of the children, they're cooking food, they're doing it all when she does
nothing. But it is that way because that's what he has allowed. He
has allowed that, and so she's like, Hey, I had kids,
but I really didn't want kids. So he's gonna take care of those kids.
I'm not doing that. He's gonna do it because he wanted them.
I really have heard of situations like that. I personally know people who are
in situations like that, and it's just not good. It's not healthy.
So when there are no standards, then you have no boundaries, you have
no requirements, no anything. That's why so many of you go through hell,
you go through pure hell in your relationships because you have no boundaries.
You're afraid to say this, You're afraid to say that, you're afraid to
do this, You're afraid to do that. No boundaries, you let your
significant other do whatever whenever, however, whenever they want to. So when
you give a person that kind of power, they're gonna take it. They're
going to take it. Stop thinking in your brain that he or she loves
you so much when they are showing you how they feel about you. You
have no standards when you got with him or her, and because of it,
you're in an unhealthy relationship. So many people are unbelievably unhappy, unhappy.
But you know what the truth is, people are unhappy before they ever
get in a relationship. There is no happiness. There is no peace when
you don't love yourself, When you don't know yourself, there is none because
people are seeking, seeking, seeking, chasing through all types of means,
trying to find love because you don't have that inner peace, you don't have
that self love, so you're looking forward somewhere else through want someone else,
and most times you end up with someone who think like you. Two immature
people, two individuals who need to grow and develop more mentally, and it's
just a mess. Many people are in and out of relationships because again,
you have not yet discovered who you are as a person. You don't know,
you don't understand yourself. Because many people don't even want to spend time
by themselves. They always have to be around someone. You haven't figured you
out. There's no love within self. Some of you are still having pity
parties from something that happened years and years ago. And I'm not saying that
things don't affect you, but how much they'll affect you, it's on you.
It's on you. No one can bear the butt of your pain,
but you. I don't care how much someone loves you. They can't take
your pain for you. They can't they can't feel what you feel. People
can go through similar things, but they're different individuals, so you're going to
feel differently on different levels about a similar situation. You are looking to be
saved and you know, changed, and you know, rescue all types of
things by your significant other, and it's just not happening because they need to
find themselves totally. You get on these different dating sites and you're bamboozled on
the dating sites. If you're bamboozo in person, you know you're gonna be
bamboozed on the dating sites. And I'm not down in dating sites because people
are people, whether they're on dating sites or you see them in person,
they'll mess either way. And when you don't know yourself, it clearly means
you have low standards or no standards. Some people, they are so beautiful,
I mean really really pretty, really really handsome, but they have no
self confidence none, And you can ask them, do you love yourself?
Of course I love myself. No you don't. You think you do,
and you made to a degree, but you don't in the way that you
need to love yourself. Most people don't because they're holding on to things that
inhibit their growth. They're holding on to things that cause them negative ways of
thinking. They're holding on to things that cause them self inflicted pain. They're
holding on to things that suffocate them. They're holding on to things that make
them hate themselves. They're holding on to things that they should have let go
long, long, long time ago. Then you get into these relationships with
no standards or low standards, because you all you want is love. All
you want is someone to love you, someone to be with. And that's
the room mindset to have because if you're just eager for anything, that's what
you're bound to get anything. And believe me when I tell you, your
significant other can see your vulnerability. Your significant other knows exactly what he or
she can and can't do. They know and most times they can do almost
anything because they know that you're gonna always have your arms stretch out open for
them. They know it. That's why so many people are in relationships being
taken advantage of and being used. So many miserable, miserable. But you
can't tell people nothing because they think they are really, really, really really
in love. And I've told you so many times A person who love you
is not going to take you for granted, mistreat you, disrespect you,
abuse you in no shape, form or fashion, not a person who truly
loves you. But most people can't see that because, again, as I
stated at the beginning of this episode, people love based on their own wants
and desires. They're you know, it's all about self. You're not looking
at the other person, what you're getting from him or her. It's all
about how you feel, how much you love him, how much you love
her, until you're blind to everything else. That's why people will do anything,
because they're basing things, basing basically on self without even realizing that's what
they're doing. That is exactly what they're doing. Anyone who don't understand the
need for me to elaborate, elaborate more, reach out to me. I'll
be glad to break it down more to you. Once you get to a
place in life where you have dealt with your past pains, or you have
dealt with whatever it is that ails you, that caused you to be in
a negative mental state, that causes you to have a mindset that's working against
you, Listen, listen to me. All you gotta do is give that
person who you ignore the most the time and tension and energy that they need.
And that person is you. That's you. I don't care how much
you love someone. The truth is coming to the light. The truth is
coming forth. When you don't love yourself, it's going to show. It's
going to show in how you treat that person, because some of you will
do any and everything. It's going to show in how you allow that person
to treat you. And like I said, when you have no boundaries or
low boundaries, that's because you have low standards or no standards. It truly
is no standards, you'll get anything. Low standards, you'll get anything.
And it's so crazy how people in this world today are in that category lo
or no, just do anything, don't care. Women begging men to be
in relationships, women paying men to be in relationships, men paying women to
be in relationships, men begging women to be in relationships. Craziness, craziness.
When you get to love yourself and you understand who you are as a
person, you know your value and your work, you're gonna laugh at the
things you used to do. You're gonna be a pared too, but you're
gonna laugh because it's unbelievable some of the things people allow themselves to go through,
some of the things that people have to deal with because they got into
relationships with no standards or low standards. It's all up to you. It's
never up to the other person. If you in a relationship with someone,
it's up to you who you open yourself up to, so you can blame
him and hurt him or hurt all you want to. It is up to
you who you get into a relationship with. It is up to you how
you allow that person to treat you. It's up to you. What they
do may be foul, low down, rotten, but it's up to you
how you allow them to treat you. They gonna get away with what you
let them get away with. They're gonna treat you how you allow them to
treat you. Some of you get into relationships and you're groomed. You're groomed
to give up your power. You're groomed to be fearful of that individual.
Male they're female. You're groomed because they do things subtle. Sometimes it's not
so subtle, but they do things to see your reaction, to see will
they be able to get away with it, and so many of you let
them. You let them get away, and guess what, they come back
again with something else, and the next thing you know, you've given up
your power. The next thing you know, you're fearful, you're disrespected,
you're taken for granted because you allowed that person to put you in that situation.
You allowed that person to come into your life and do whatever it is
that they choose to do to you in any way they choose to do it.
You allowed it. They could have never abused you had you never allowed
it. They could have never disrespected you had you never allowed it. They
couldn't have ever disrespected you verbally. They could have never ever, I mean
never ever, ever done you wrong in any way unless you first allowed it.
People have to realize, when you don't know yourself and you don't love
yourself, you open yourself up to unnecessary self inflicted pain. And the reason
I say self inflicted pain, oh, because you're gonna get some headache and
heartache, because you're gonna get with the person who's no good for you.
You're gonna get with the person who need to mature as well, and they're
gonna bring all of their baggage and dumping on you. Then you try to
carry theirs and yours. You're gonna go through. And most people are going
through because they're in relationships with people they should have never been with. They
have no no no standards, no low low standards, no boundaries, no
peace. And I've told you so many times. If you want to know
the truth about yourself and your relationship, just sit down, sit down somewhere,
Sit you little too, shit down somewhere and just think about your relationship.
What is he doing to you? What is she doing to you?
You're gonna see the truth. You're going to see the truth. You're gonna
see if you love yourself or not. Because the truth is evident in how
you allow yourself to be treated and also what you allow and accept. It's
evident. So that's what I have for you today, as always is up
to you. I just give you the information and hope and pray that people
allow it to me. Eight, get deep inside, get an understanding of
what I'm saying. I can't change anyone. All I can do is encourage
you. All I can do is let you know you don't have to live
your life the way you are. Most people are prisoners to their own mindset.
Don't even understand it. You ever met a person that tell you the
same thing a million times, the same thing. You try to talk to
this person, and you talk to this person and they tell you the same
thing. They're going through some tough times, but it's because of their own
doing, but they can't see it. They keep going back for second,
thirds, four, fifth, sixth, seventh, and on and on,
but they can't see it. So many are blind to their own ways.
That's why you hear me sometimes say people are in their own way. They're
blind to their own ways, their own ways of doing things. They're blind
to them. No one can change you, but you. I know that
you can be encouraged and motivated and all of that, but you still have
to be the one to do the work. If you don't have any standards,
you're heading for drama, drama street, no doubt whatsoever, you're gonna
have chaos in your life. I just wish that people would just take time
for self, get to know self, get to love self, because it
will change your life completely. But people are so focused on self gratification,
being loved and loving someone when they have no clue what love is think you
know, but you don't know, because if you did, you wouldn't take
the things you take. You wouldn't accept the things you accept, decisions and
choices you make, you wouldn't All right, I'm done. That's all I'm
gonna say on that. Thank you so much for listening. Much love to
you, you and you I appreciate you highly. Please share this episode,
go out to Relatable life Chronicles, check it out and share. Please reach
out to me go to my podcast page. It'll tell you how you can
reach me. Also at the end of my podcast, it'll tell you.
If you look on my front page, it'll tell you also how you can
reach and read my blogs. So check it out. Thank you again,
much love. I end every episode the same for a reason, and I
hope you do it. Thank on it