WEBVTT 1 00:00:02.200 --> 00:00:06.320 All of my athletes, I shared with them the morning practice that for me, 2 00:00:06.360 --> 00:00:11.199 it's a non negotiable. It's seven am here in Vietnam. I love 3 00:00:11.240 --> 00:00:15.119 my morning practice. It gets me into a beautiful frequency where I can show 4 00:00:15.199 --> 00:00:17.920 up as the best version of myself. And it's a non the goostable. 5 00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.800 So I was up at four, I get my movement in, I go 6 00:00:20.879 --> 00:00:24.280 through the mental process that is just remind us. For me, I do 7 00:00:24.320 --> 00:00:27.879 a little self study and I'm here and I feel pretty sharp with you because 8 00:00:27.879 --> 00:00:30.960 of the energy that I'm in. For that reason, I prefer to make 9 00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.359 it a way of being for my athletes or anyone that I'm working with, 10 00:00:34.439 --> 00:00:37.759 I would say, you know, to have that balance rather than the extremes 11 00:00:37.880 --> 00:00:43.359 is always going to be what elicits maximum performance. Hi. This is Lucas 12 00:00:43.399 --> 00:00:47.439 MacEwan from Abbotsford, BC, Canada, and I play at led View Golf 13 00:00:47.479 --> 00:00:54.600 Course. This is Golf Smarter number nine hundred and thirty two. Consistency is 14 00:00:54.640 --> 00:00:59.320 in reach. Your potential is limitless. The mountain has no top with Gary 15 00:00:59.359 --> 00:01:04.959 Waters. This is golf Smarter sharing stories, tips and insights from great golf 16 00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:11.000 minds to help you lower your score and raise your golf IQ. Here's your 17 00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:15.959 host, Fred Green. Welcome to the Golf Smarter podcast. Gary. Hi, 18 00:01:15.040 --> 00:01:18.760 Fred, great to talk to you. Yeah, it's great to be 19 00:01:18.840 --> 00:01:22.239 with you. Thanks for having me on. Well, you reached out to 20 00:01:22.280 --> 00:01:26.239 me, and I'm always intrigued why would people reach out to me about being 21 00:01:26.280 --> 00:01:30.040 on the podcast, especially mental game coaches or mental coaches. I don't even 22 00:01:30.040 --> 00:01:37.799 know if you're a mental game coach, but that is your expertise is helping 23 00:01:37.840 --> 00:01:46.040 people set yourself free from inter suffering, which is great line. And then 24 00:01:46.280 --> 00:01:51.760 in your line is also by mastering your relationship with yourself. And I can 25 00:01:51.799 --> 00:01:57.120 see how that works for golf. I really can. How frequently do you 26 00:01:57.159 --> 00:02:02.120 get to work with golfers very frequent. I feel really blessed because I've got 27 00:02:02.120 --> 00:02:06.599 a history in the game. As you know, my dad was a golf 28 00:02:06.599 --> 00:02:09.840 pro for thirty years, so I know the sport. Well, it's a 29 00:02:09.919 --> 00:02:15.039 sport that I was actually looking to go pro in myself when I was younger, 30 00:02:15.280 --> 00:02:22.039 and it was ironically the mental game that was probably the difference between you 31 00:02:22.039 --> 00:02:25.840 know, really succeeding in the sport rather than going in a different direction. 32 00:02:27.039 --> 00:02:30.639 But in my world, I'm so grateful for every little turn that happens, 33 00:02:30.639 --> 00:02:35.080 because it's got me to where I am. So so yeah, I reached 34 00:02:35.120 --> 00:02:38.879 out because I listened by chance. But as I just said, never any 35 00:02:38.919 --> 00:02:43.599 accidents in my world. I listened by chance to an episode You're Done, 36 00:02:43.639 --> 00:02:47.159 and it resonated, and I thought, I'd love to speak into that conversation, 37 00:02:47.319 --> 00:02:50.919 share a little bit, you know, from my perspectives, see if 38 00:02:50.919 --> 00:02:53.840 it resonates, and you know, we can hopefully add a lot of value 39 00:02:53.879 --> 00:03:00.319 here to some people that are tuning in. I'm curious to know if your 40 00:03:00.319 --> 00:03:07.439 father was a teaching pro for thirty plus years, how what were the conversations 41 00:03:07.439 --> 00:03:12.639 that you had with him and did they ever go into the mental aspect of 42 00:03:12.680 --> 00:03:16.879 golf. I'd say only towards the end as I got a little bit older. 43 00:03:17.240 --> 00:03:21.520 My dad never put any pressure on me to play golf, so it 44 00:03:21.560 --> 00:03:27.439 wasn't actually my first sport. I started taking it seriously around i'd say twelve, 45 00:03:27.719 --> 00:03:30.919 which is quite late, you know, to have a DA to be 46 00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:34.240 a pro golfer. Yeah, yeah, yeah, so you know, for 47 00:03:34.319 --> 00:03:37.680 me, I was living out in Germany at the time where my dad was 48 00:03:37.719 --> 00:03:40.439 teaching golf, and it was a very young sport there. But for me, 49 00:03:40.479 --> 00:03:45.599 it was more ice hockey and football because they're bigger sports there than golf. 50 00:03:45.639 --> 00:03:49.560 It was quite a young sport. But I'm just assuming by your accent 51 00:03:49.599 --> 00:03:53.639 that when you say football, you're talking not about American football but what we 52 00:03:53.719 --> 00:03:58.800 call soccer, right, okay, yeah, yeah, okay again, I 53 00:03:58.800 --> 00:04:01.479 we'll call it football for you. Yeah, I'll get into trouble from my 54 00:04:01.560 --> 00:04:04.960 fellow Brits if I started calling it soccer, I think, but yeah, 55 00:04:05.039 --> 00:04:10.360 yeah, you don't do that, lose your credibility immediately, No, I 56 00:04:10.400 --> 00:04:14.159 know, don't just still switched off, turned off. But yeah, as 57 00:04:14.159 --> 00:04:17.600 it relates to the mental side, it was actually much later in my life 58 00:04:17.639 --> 00:04:24.519 where I developed insights into the mental side of golf and sport in general. 59 00:04:24.920 --> 00:04:30.839 You know, I coach people in all different sports because fundamentally, yes, 60 00:04:30.879 --> 00:04:35.639 they're they're a golfer, but they're a human and there's there's very similar traits 61 00:04:35.639 --> 00:04:41.600 that we run as human beings as it relates to performance, but just as 62 00:04:41.600 --> 00:04:46.279 it relates to fulfillment and what kind of gets in the way, you know. 63 00:04:46.879 --> 00:04:50.000 So yeah, for me, those conversations didn't really happen with me and 64 00:04:50.040 --> 00:04:54.000 my dad as it relates to the mental side. It was very much focused 65 00:04:54.000 --> 00:04:57.439 on for me, mechanics, right, which are important, you know, 66 00:04:57.920 --> 00:05:00.439 that's why all of these amazing people Jo bros. They've got you know, 67 00:05:00.720 --> 00:05:05.439 coaches for every part of their game. But for me, what I really 68 00:05:05.519 --> 00:05:11.120 noticed quite quickly in the realm of performance is that when it comes to that 69 00:05:11.240 --> 00:05:17.720 level, they've honed their swings so much that they're very close apart from a 70 00:05:17.759 --> 00:05:24.759 few outliers, right, But what makes the difference is the mindset. And 71 00:05:24.959 --> 00:05:28.720 I actually saw it in a in a totally different sport, which is where 72 00:05:28.759 --> 00:05:34.000 I was snowboarding with two twins. So we've got like the same what we 73 00:05:34.000 --> 00:05:39.199 could call me too, you know, the body, very similar upbrings, 74 00:05:39.360 --> 00:05:43.360 similar parents. But we went to go down a black run and one went 75 00:05:43.399 --> 00:05:46.720 down and the other didn't. The same, very similar abilities, and it 76 00:05:46.920 --> 00:05:50.959 just showed me so clearly that the power of mindset and how it can really 77 00:05:50.959 --> 00:05:57.519 stopp us when it comes to performance. And the twin chose not to do 78 00:05:57.639 --> 00:06:00.920 the harder run. Is that what you're saying, Yeah, because fundamentally what 79 00:06:01.040 --> 00:06:05.560 was driving him was fear. And this is one of the things that you 80 00:06:05.600 --> 00:06:10.480 know, I love to show my athletes, especially my golfers is how the 81 00:06:10.800 --> 00:06:16.639 power of the subconscious and how we have these blind spots where we're actually running 82 00:06:16.720 --> 00:06:21.519 fear in the background, but we've become so used to it that it's become 83 00:06:21.560 --> 00:06:27.879 normalized. But this is the difference between natural and normal. What's become normal 84 00:06:28.040 --> 00:06:30.279 is this kind of constant state of fight or flight. And I'd say most 85 00:06:30.319 --> 00:06:36.160 people living are living their lives that way right unbeknownst to themselves. But so 86 00:06:36.639 --> 00:06:41.800 whether someone teas it up on the first and it's you know, a just 87 00:06:41.879 --> 00:06:46.920 a Texas scramble or something like that, or whether they're seeing it up on 88 00:06:46.319 --> 00:06:49.959 the first tier of the British Open, you know, it's their perception of 89 00:06:50.000 --> 00:06:54.959 the importance of the event that then creates fear that will then create tension, 90 00:06:55.439 --> 00:06:59.199 which leads to timing going out and the ball not going where they want it. 91 00:06:59.680 --> 00:07:02.079 You know, a very quick summary of the impact of fear. But 92 00:07:02.199 --> 00:07:08.160 to not know where that comes from is that blind spot, which is where 93 00:07:08.199 --> 00:07:12.480 I get to show people what's really going on in the background. It's so 94 00:07:12.600 --> 00:07:16.759 much fun and it's so liberating, hence the Live Limitless brand and stepping into 95 00:07:16.759 --> 00:07:25.040 peace and freedom fascinating. So you're saying fear drives us, and I'm sure 96 00:07:25.040 --> 00:07:31.959 that it's magnified by amateur golfers one hundredfold over professional golfers. But professional golfers, 97 00:07:32.000 --> 00:07:41.519 professional performers, they are also succumbed to fear driving them, I would 98 00:07:41.560 --> 00:07:45.839 say. So, you know, on the deepest level, the mind is 99 00:07:45.879 --> 00:07:50.439 designed to predict and protect. So the mind that it's you know, core, 100 00:07:50.920 --> 00:07:57.399 is rooted in survival. But what we don't realize is how those survival 101 00:07:57.439 --> 00:08:03.720 instincts that are just so in build they permeate now into the modern world. 102 00:08:03.839 --> 00:08:07.759 So now you know, I feel like you and I might be blessed to 103 00:08:07.800 --> 00:08:09.480 not walk down the street and bump into a tiger. I mean, if 104 00:08:09.519 --> 00:08:13.000 you do, that's like quite an interesting day. But you know, for 105 00:08:13.040 --> 00:08:18.439 ours it's threats to our persona, to our ego, you know, to 106 00:08:18.480 --> 00:08:26.600 our how people view us. And we now translate those survival instincts into those 107 00:08:26.720 --> 00:08:31.439 fears where if our persona's going to be diminished, we still go into fight, 108 00:08:31.519 --> 00:08:37.320 flight or freeze. That creates tension, that creates resistance. And whereever 109 00:08:37.360 --> 00:08:43.159 we have resistance, whether you're swinging a golf club, a tennis racket, 110 00:08:43.320 --> 00:08:48.399 you know, whether you're in baseball, any kind of tension, it puts 111 00:08:48.440 --> 00:08:52.399 you in a state of brace. Right, So before we can even move 112 00:08:52.519 --> 00:08:56.480 into taking action of swinging the golf club, there's that split second where we 113 00:08:56.519 --> 00:09:01.399 move out of brace into some form flow. But if you're in stress again, 114 00:09:01.440 --> 00:09:07.000 there's so much tension, you're not fully flowing. And those minute kind 115 00:09:07.039 --> 00:09:11.759 of milliseconds can determine missing a short part. It can whether you hit it 116 00:09:11.759 --> 00:09:15.480 out of bounds, whether you put it into the water, hasard into the 117 00:09:15.480 --> 00:09:18.759 bunker, whatever that is. So, yeah, it's fascinating. It's that 118 00:09:20.080 --> 00:09:24.039 it's that small difference that makes a huge difference. Yeah, And it's not 119 00:09:24.360 --> 00:09:31.320 just a reaction, it's internal. Yeah, and often just completely subconscious as 120 00:09:31.360 --> 00:09:35.879 in like that they're aware maybe of like a little bit of an elevated heart 121 00:09:35.960 --> 00:09:39.399 rate, you know, but they've shifted into their sympathetic branch of their nervous 122 00:09:39.440 --> 00:09:45.159 system. Right. So, parasympathetic is where we're just fully at peace, 123 00:09:45.200 --> 00:09:48.120 we're fully at ease, where we're you know, just going around with the 124 00:09:48.159 --> 00:09:52.919 guys or the girls and we're just having this amazing, beautiful practice round where 125 00:09:52.919 --> 00:09:58.080 everything's just flowing flawlessly and you're you're taking on shots that you know, you 126 00:09:58.120 --> 00:10:00.799 wish you could do in the tournament, but when it comes to game time, 127 00:10:01.240 --> 00:10:03.600 you know, that's where you see people just fall to pieces under the 128 00:10:03.639 --> 00:10:13.600 pressure and it's unnecessary, it's real for that person, and fundamentally, it's 129 00:10:13.639 --> 00:10:20.240 the perception of danger, and perception is just so much of my work is 130 00:10:20.600 --> 00:10:26.000 to showing people what lens they're looking through that generates an experience that now they 131 00:10:26.080 --> 00:10:31.240 experience on their inner world as fear. So hopefully that made sense. I 132 00:10:31.320 --> 00:10:37.159 said a lot. No, no, it's a lot to absorb, and 133 00:10:37.320 --> 00:10:39.879 let's do that right now as we take a break and we'll be back in 134 00:10:41.120 --> 00:10:46.159 about a minute and a half or two and we'll continue this conversation with Gary 135 00:10:46.159 --> 00:10:58.759 Waters. A moment ago you said unnecessary. I want to dig into that 136 00:11:01.399 --> 00:11:05.919 because if it's unnecessary, why are we dragging it into our lives? So 137 00:11:05.120 --> 00:11:13.279 I love your your your word here of dragging right, because without history, 138 00:11:13.080 --> 00:11:18.960 we don't have a problem in the present. So what's actually happening is our 139 00:11:20.080 --> 00:11:24.039 past, whether it's perceived failure. And again I use that word very particularly, 140 00:11:24.120 --> 00:11:31.320 and that you know I'm incredibly focused on language, and we can go 141 00:11:31.399 --> 00:11:35.559 into that maybe in a little bit but language for me is what limits us 142 00:11:35.799 --> 00:11:39.960 the conversations of our mind. But the dragging is we drag our history into 143 00:11:39.000 --> 00:11:45.000 the present, as in past hers, informing future fear that shows up in 144 00:11:45.039 --> 00:11:50.360 our present moment and leads to non inspiring outcomes. I've never said those words 145 00:11:50.360 --> 00:11:56.799 in that order, but hopefully that resonates congratulations just moving through me. But 146 00:11:56.960 --> 00:12:01.960 yeah, it's it's really recognizing that the inability to let go of our history 147 00:12:03.840 --> 00:12:07.559 is then what we use as a reference point as to why we can't do 148 00:12:07.639 --> 00:12:13.120 something, and therefore how we show up in the present moment is just completely 149 00:12:13.639 --> 00:12:18.679 compromised. So the reason why I said it's unnecessary is that our natural state 150 00:12:18.879 --> 00:12:22.639 is peace, it's ease, it's a sense of joy, freedom. We 151 00:12:22.679 --> 00:12:26.679 could put the words power and love in there, you know, introducing love 152 00:12:26.720 --> 00:12:31.679 on a golf podcast. But that's our natural state. But most people are 153 00:12:31.679 --> 00:12:35.960 living in this kind of normalized stress response, or they're in the anxieties or 154 00:12:37.000 --> 00:12:41.600 in the depressions and the apathies. And it's just for me, it's not 155 00:12:41.759 --> 00:12:48.039 necessary, but it's necessary until it's no longer necessary, as in it brings 156 00:12:48.080 --> 00:12:54.120 about almost like a desperation moment where we start to look within rather than externally, 157 00:12:54.679 --> 00:13:01.720 and that's where everything starts to shift. Interesting, you said the inability 158 00:13:01.759 --> 00:13:05.799 to let go of history. I think that should maybe that should have been 159 00:13:05.840 --> 00:13:11.519 the name of the sport versus golf, because it would just warn people ahead 160 00:13:11.559 --> 00:13:15.879 of time, you're sure you want to do this, because whatever you do, 161 00:13:16.240 --> 00:13:20.799 it's gonna haunt you. It's gonna be there all the day. Yeah. 162 00:13:20.960 --> 00:13:28.759 Yeah, we build these past references that then create a real foundation for 163 00:13:28.919 --> 00:13:33.759 our belief of inadequacy that we have. You know, I feel humans we 164 00:13:33.840 --> 00:13:39.480 could buck it into believing that they're inadequate, that they don't have enough, 165 00:13:39.159 --> 00:13:43.720 and some form of insecurity as in fear, which is where we started. 166 00:13:43.759 --> 00:13:48.840 But yeah, all of those past hers they build up and we carry them 167 00:13:48.840 --> 00:13:52.159 around, but they just feed into this fundamental belief that who we are is 168 00:13:52.600 --> 00:13:58.399 not enough. And that's where it gets really slippery because those then that perception 169 00:13:58.519 --> 00:14:05.720 of self, then generate the forts, the feelings that then generate the behaviors 170 00:14:05.759 --> 00:14:09.399 that then get the results. So for a lot of kind of mental coaches, 171 00:14:09.440 --> 00:14:15.960 they'll look at the behavior because it's the precursor to the result that followed 172 00:14:16.000 --> 00:14:18.440 it. But for me, that's just a little bit, you know, 173 00:14:18.559 --> 00:14:22.559 or quite a lot of bit you know too early. We want to get 174 00:14:22.600 --> 00:14:26.879 to the root cause, and that for me is that perception that's completely a 175 00:14:26.919 --> 00:14:31.480 blind spot. So there's no judgment, no shame, no guilt or anything. 176 00:14:31.840 --> 00:14:35.559 It's just unknown. We don't know. And this is like these beautiful 177 00:14:35.120 --> 00:14:39.039 awareness ships that I love to share with my athletes, is to show them 178 00:14:39.080 --> 00:14:43.840 that in ways that they don't know, their mind is limiting them because they 179 00:14:43.840 --> 00:14:50.200 have a perception of themselves that does not allow their world, does not allow 180 00:14:50.320 --> 00:14:54.639 for them to actually climb the mountain that has no top, which is their 181 00:14:54.679 --> 00:15:00.440 potential. The mountain that has no top. Okay, no a name for 182 00:15:00.480 --> 00:15:05.240 the sport we're saying that. You know, oh, I want to you 183 00:15:05.320 --> 00:15:07.679 hear a lot. I'm going to help you reach your potential. I'm like, 184 00:15:07.720 --> 00:15:13.879 please, don't you know my potential is limitless because that's how I how 185 00:15:13.919 --> 00:15:18.200 I view us is that you know, we we're human beings, but I 186 00:15:18.320 --> 00:15:22.960 prefer being human, which is just totally different. That's where we go within. 187 00:15:24.320 --> 00:15:26.919 This is where we discover our true nature. You know, it probably 188 00:15:26.919 --> 00:15:31.279 goes a bit more into the esoterics here on the Golf Podcast, but yeah, 189 00:15:31.759 --> 00:15:35.559 that's okay. You know, it's my favorite kind of conversation. It's 190 00:15:35.600 --> 00:15:41.000 just when we start to actually turn our attention from out there. And it's 191 00:15:41.039 --> 00:15:45.559 so natural to put our focus out there because based on the brain looking for 192 00:15:45.799 --> 00:15:48.720 survival threats. But the moment we can actually just take a minute and this 193 00:15:48.759 --> 00:15:54.799 could be put under the level of like under the auspices of my mindfulness or 194 00:15:54.840 --> 00:15:58.240 something like that. You know, I generally stay away from certain words that 195 00:15:58.639 --> 00:16:03.320 have this you know, fluffiness nature to them, where you know, I 196 00:16:03.360 --> 00:16:06.080 get a lot of I'm a guy's guys. I get a lot of guys 197 00:16:06.159 --> 00:16:07.720 just like mindfulness, Like, how's that going to help me? Oh, 198 00:16:07.799 --> 00:16:11.000 that's okay. I'm from California. That's how we live. So amazing. 199 00:16:11.440 --> 00:16:15.799 I need to need to California, right. But it's it's once we turn 200 00:16:15.840 --> 00:16:21.799 our attention within and we start to discover our true nature, that who we 201 00:16:21.840 --> 00:16:26.759 are is completely boundless free. Then when we really get in touch with that 202 00:16:26.960 --> 00:16:33.000 through invalidating who were not, then what starts to happen is you live from 203 00:16:33.080 --> 00:16:37.159 that space and you play from that space. It's where you are just completely 204 00:16:37.200 --> 00:16:41.600 committed to what you want to achieve in the world. But you're no longer 205 00:16:41.720 --> 00:16:45.559 attached to that, as in, you can be with all circumstances. And 206 00:16:45.600 --> 00:16:51.039 that's my definition of success. You know, most people have focused on accumulation, 207 00:16:51.159 --> 00:16:53.559 on the trappings of like the status, the car, the house, 208 00:16:53.639 --> 00:16:57.200 the girl or guy on your side, whatever you're into. But for me, 209 00:16:57.440 --> 00:17:03.759 the true definition of success is the ability to be with life regardless of 210 00:17:03.799 --> 00:17:08.559 what shows up to maintain my piece because from that state, Fred, anything's 211 00:17:08.599 --> 00:17:14.599 possible, especially when it comes to then high performance sports. Right, but 212 00:17:14.640 --> 00:17:18.119 what about us? What about the amateurs? How do we stop sabotaging ourselves 213 00:17:18.160 --> 00:17:22.920 with this? What tools do we have available to us? Or should we 214 00:17:22.960 --> 00:17:29.400 be aware of? So again I love yeah, I love your language there, 215 00:17:29.440 --> 00:17:33.160 you know what should we be aware of? Right? Because my role 216 00:17:33.200 --> 00:17:37.480 here as like a coach to whoever I'm sat in front of. I often 217 00:17:37.519 --> 00:17:40.359 get that question, Hey, what's the number one thing that I can do? 218 00:17:40.440 --> 00:17:44.119 What's like the tool? Right? And for me, I'm not so 219 00:17:44.240 --> 00:17:47.680 much of a tool guy, which can often be disappointing. Sorry, but 220 00:17:47.920 --> 00:17:52.960 I'm actually more more in the world of awareness, right, because tools is 221 00:17:52.000 --> 00:17:55.920 more in that behavior that I was speaking about earlier. It's like, oh, 222 00:17:55.960 --> 00:17:59.920 what should I adjust you know what, and there are some great things 223 00:18:00.279 --> 00:18:04.480 can do. But if you're just using tools, then what you're doing is 224 00:18:04.680 --> 00:18:11.160 just sustaining like your current version of yourself, but just surviving on through it. 225 00:18:11.640 --> 00:18:14.039 And so that can be in life, but in your golf game, 226 00:18:14.039 --> 00:18:21.039 you're just kind of like adapting. You're you're adjusting your behavior adaptations to it's 227 00:18:21.079 --> 00:18:25.359 on top of that, which is driving the car, if that makes sense. 228 00:18:25.799 --> 00:18:29.440 So what we want to get to is that deeper level of code, 229 00:18:29.680 --> 00:18:34.680 the subconscious mind. And it's no different for the for the for the everyday 230 00:18:34.720 --> 00:18:38.160 golfer than it is for the pros because as I started this podcast, like, 231 00:18:38.759 --> 00:18:45.319 it's a human being underneath the surface and based on what triggers us within 232 00:18:45.880 --> 00:18:52.480 is our perception of reality. So for the amateur golfer, they are then 233 00:18:52.599 --> 00:18:55.960 they might be playing like their gold medal, like their main tournament of the 234 00:18:56.039 --> 00:19:00.359 year. They're not feeling less pressure, they're not feeling less tension. They've 235 00:19:00.400 --> 00:19:06.119 activated their stress response in the same way as you know a Tiger Woods or 236 00:19:06.279 --> 00:19:11.880 a Rory mcelwright. Like it's a human system that's activated based on the perception 237 00:19:11.960 --> 00:19:15.839 of fear. So it's the same if we want to call it tools, 238 00:19:15.839 --> 00:19:19.920 but more the same awareness shifts that you know, in this moment something is 239 00:19:19.920 --> 00:19:25.480 a perceived threat, but is that really true? And that's what I love 240 00:19:25.519 --> 00:19:27.759 to investigate with anyone that I'm working with, is that, you know, 241 00:19:27.920 --> 00:19:30.319 is it truly a life threat? You know, do we need to call 242 00:19:30.319 --> 00:19:34.359 you an ambulance right now? Or how is that truly? What's driving that? 243 00:19:34.559 --> 00:19:38.440 Is it some form of like I'm trying to avoid not being enough? 244 00:19:40.200 --> 00:19:44.200 You know what am I trying? What's my intention behind it? And that's 245 00:19:44.240 --> 00:19:48.359 where we get to the real juicy part, which is once you realize it's 246 00:19:48.400 --> 00:19:52.359 not actually a truth, it's just a belief, then you can let it 247 00:19:52.400 --> 00:19:56.119 go. That's where you shift from resistance to life, which doesn't feel like 248 00:19:56.160 --> 00:20:00.960 resistance in the moment, but it is to accept ms and that's where peace 249 00:20:00.960 --> 00:20:04.599 arises. That's where flow happens. And that's what we could call, you 250 00:20:04.640 --> 00:20:08.680 know, being in the zone or that flow state that so many people are 251 00:20:08.799 --> 00:20:17.160 searching for outside of themselves, but actually it's an internal process. Mm hmm. 252 00:20:18.240 --> 00:20:22.799 Wow, take another time out, we'll be back right after this. 253 00:20:29.720 --> 00:20:37.440 Gary, what was your aha moment as a golfer that made you realize that 254 00:20:37.799 --> 00:20:45.599 you had a lot to give and learn and help. Yeah, it's a 255 00:20:45.599 --> 00:20:52.640 beautiful question, especially growing up around you know, a golf pro. Yeah, 256 00:20:52.759 --> 00:20:56.400 beautiful question. And and for me, Fred, if I'm completely honest 257 00:20:56.440 --> 00:21:00.759 with you, it didn't happen as a golfer, you know. It's I 258 00:21:00.799 --> 00:21:04.799 got to a point where I just decided who I was as in as a 259 00:21:04.799 --> 00:21:11.720 golfer, was inadequate. I was not enough. So I'd actually got into 260 00:21:11.240 --> 00:21:15.480 the world of physical fitness. I used to be a trainer, so I've 261 00:21:15.599 --> 00:21:22.279 kind of got the body covered right. But it's it was actually through moving 262 00:21:22.319 --> 00:21:27.960 into a different career where I hit absolutely rock bottom and I wanted to I 263 00:21:29.000 --> 00:21:32.799 got to a point of wanting to leave the world. It was that desperate 264 00:21:33.160 --> 00:21:37.640 because who I was for myself was inadequate. I didn't know that at the 265 00:21:37.720 --> 00:21:42.960 time. But the byproduct of inadequacy is perfectionism, or it could come across 266 00:21:44.000 --> 00:21:48.200 as people pleasing or some form of control. But I was doing all that 267 00:21:48.240 --> 00:21:52.200 I could, Fred, in order to you know, look amazing, in 268 00:21:52.319 --> 00:21:55.839 order to have all of the money, have all of the success, have 269 00:21:55.920 --> 00:21:59.799 the girl on my side, all of this. Then then I would be 270 00:21:59.799 --> 00:22:06.160 an And that's an exhausting proposition. So for me, the bigger harm moment 271 00:22:06.680 --> 00:22:11.799 was actually desperation. It was passing out on my office floor, not knowing 272 00:22:11.920 --> 00:22:17.440 what to do, so confused because I was actually starting to achieve some of 273 00:22:17.480 --> 00:22:22.400 these things that I thought would make me happy. Yeah I had a number 274 00:22:22.400 --> 00:22:26.000 one business, it was good in my field. Yeah I had a good 275 00:22:26.039 --> 00:22:27.880 car, great girl on my side, So all of these things. But 276 00:22:29.000 --> 00:22:32.759 that's where I started to realize, wait a minute, it's not out there 277 00:22:33.279 --> 00:22:37.039 that's the generator of my fulfillment. It's somewhere else, and at that point 278 00:22:37.079 --> 00:22:41.359 I didn't know where. So I got into personal growth, which I had 279 00:22:41.400 --> 00:22:45.880 no idea even existed, right, and it led me on quite an interesting 280 00:22:45.960 --> 00:22:52.200 path with different mentors that have been both life saving and hugely inspirational in my 281 00:22:52.279 --> 00:22:55.240 career. A lot of what I'm sharing now, to be honest, isn't 282 00:22:55.400 --> 00:22:57.400 like my genius. I don't take credit for it. It's stuff that I've 283 00:22:57.480 --> 00:23:02.200 learned from them. But it was that awhen a shift for me, that 284 00:23:02.319 --> 00:23:08.319 recontextualization of life, the shift in perspective that changed everything for me and for 285 00:23:08.440 --> 00:23:12.119 me that then started a journey that twelve years later, I feel so blessed 286 00:23:12.119 --> 00:23:18.400 to share literally life saving insights for people you know that are suffering. But 287 00:23:18.960 --> 00:23:22.880 it's so fascinating how these actually translate into sport as well. So yeah, 288 00:23:23.039 --> 00:23:27.559 I find there's a quote by Jim Rohwn and he said, we generally only 289 00:23:27.680 --> 00:23:33.799 change for inspiration or desperation. And I definitely have like both hands if I 290 00:23:33.839 --> 00:23:37.000 have more and hold them up on desperation. But that is often so much 291 00:23:37.079 --> 00:23:44.079 the catalyst for any kind of awakening, any kind of shift, whether it's 292 00:23:44.200 --> 00:23:48.119 personal or whether it's in like golf. And they're going through what they believe 293 00:23:48.160 --> 00:23:51.960 as a slump, which isn't they just have a memory, but it's like 294 00:23:52.119 --> 00:23:56.200 from there they've hit a real low point because they have families to support, 295 00:23:56.279 --> 00:23:59.119 they have sponsors that are giving them a lot of cash, and from that 296 00:23:59.200 --> 00:24:03.960 standpoint, it can get really you know heavy. So yeah, that was 297 00:24:04.039 --> 00:24:08.920 my moment. And you know, I wish I knew what I know about 298 00:24:08.920 --> 00:24:14.559 the mental gain now when I was a kid, but I also don't because 299 00:24:14.599 --> 00:24:19.480 without all of my struggles, all of those literally life changing moments, I 300 00:24:19.519 --> 00:24:22.079 wouldn't be the man I am now. And I love the man that I 301 00:24:22.160 --> 00:24:26.119 am now. And if you knew me, like ten, twelve, fifteen 302 00:24:26.160 --> 00:24:30.240 years ago, that wouldn't have been possible to kind of move out of me 303 00:24:30.359 --> 00:24:36.079 because I hated myself. I dislike myself so much, right, And this 304 00:24:36.160 --> 00:24:40.759 is where you know, that got started early in childhood. But this is 305 00:24:40.799 --> 00:24:45.359 where so much this dragging of history comes about. That's why I love what 306 00:24:45.400 --> 00:24:49.240 you've said at certain points in this beautiful interview is that, yeah, we 307 00:24:49.359 --> 00:24:55.519 have no idea where this gets started. But to be able to realize that 308 00:24:55.759 --> 00:25:00.920 and become aware of, like where our limitations actually began, where we developed 309 00:25:00.960 --> 00:25:03.640 a perception of ourselves, well, then we can start to change that. 310 00:25:04.079 --> 00:25:10.440 And that is just that is just freedom from any kind of mental constraint. 311 00:25:11.039 --> 00:25:17.119 So long answer there, but hopefully it's okay, that's okay. I really 312 00:25:17.400 --> 00:25:25.559 truly appreciate you your honesty and sharing with us your struggle. It's so powerful. 313 00:25:26.279 --> 00:25:32.440 Is it golf? Sure, sure, it's golf, but it again, 314 00:25:32.519 --> 00:25:36.319 I thank you for sharing that. You're welcome, and you know, 315 00:25:36.400 --> 00:25:42.279 I think my story it isn't it's not. It's not that unusual. And 316 00:25:42.359 --> 00:25:45.759 that's why a lot of people resonate with me, is that so many people 317 00:25:45.799 --> 00:25:49.880 have got this, you know, going on under the surface, but they 318 00:25:49.880 --> 00:25:55.680 feel like they can't share because there's you know, elements of vulnerability, and 319 00:25:56.039 --> 00:26:00.519 especially in not in just men, but I find it most common men is 320 00:26:00.599 --> 00:26:03.640 like, you know, don't show weakness, right, It's just for me 321 00:26:03.759 --> 00:26:10.920 though. Vulnerability is like a superpower because the only person that's truly vulnerable is 322 00:26:10.960 --> 00:26:14.880 the person that's hiding, because they can then be found out. So the 323 00:26:14.960 --> 00:26:19.160 moment where we can share ourselves is the moment where we actually get true connection 324 00:26:19.279 --> 00:26:22.759 with others, whether it's you know, playing around a golf which is beautiful 325 00:26:22.839 --> 00:26:26.400 for like mental health, you know, to be able to share with people 326 00:26:26.440 --> 00:26:30.880 that can really hold a space for you, or whether it's like a coach. 327 00:26:30.920 --> 00:26:33.920 And that's why I'm blessed to work with just incredible people is because in 328 00:26:34.720 --> 00:26:41.000 that realm of let's say, celebrity to a certain degree, there's so few 329 00:26:41.079 --> 00:26:45.079 people that they can actually trust to be able to hold a space and speak 330 00:26:45.119 --> 00:26:49.599 into where someone really gets their reality, where they can truly listen from a 331 00:26:49.640 --> 00:26:53.000 place of non judgment. And I said before the word love, but that's 332 00:26:53.039 --> 00:26:59.359 truly where I come from because without those experiences, fred I just couldn't have 333 00:26:59.599 --> 00:27:03.400 sat deposit someone and go do you know what, mate? I know how 334 00:27:03.440 --> 00:27:07.160 you feel because I do because I've been to the lows of the lows, 335 00:27:07.200 --> 00:27:10.119 and I know that you can come out of it. Yeah, so you 336 00:27:10.160 --> 00:27:14.039 know that's what where golf can take you though. Right. It's just how 337 00:27:14.079 --> 00:27:19.119 many amazing tour pros have we seen actually achieve what they've been set like setting 338 00:27:19.200 --> 00:27:23.279 out for their whole life and then fall into a slump into the depression because 339 00:27:23.759 --> 00:27:27.720 they've kind of reached the top of their success mountain, not knowing that there 340 00:27:27.759 --> 00:27:32.359 is no top, but you know from their perspective they have and it's like 341 00:27:32.440 --> 00:27:37.920 where now you know what now? Right? Or like they have this identity 342 00:27:38.119 --> 00:27:44.279 linked with being a pro golfer and then suddenly they're retiring and then it's like, 343 00:27:44.319 --> 00:27:48.440 well who am I? And that causes just a ton of confusion and 344 00:27:48.559 --> 00:27:55.599 her and upset. So it's yeah, it's powerful to unpack. Yeah, 345 00:27:55.599 --> 00:28:02.079 like there's one Tiger, there's one Arnie, there's one Jack. Very few 346 00:28:02.839 --> 00:28:15.039 of professional golfers get to achieve and recognize continued success. So so many golfers 347 00:28:15.200 --> 00:28:22.200 professional golfers never get to the top. Or maybe I remember speaking to a 348 00:28:22.240 --> 00:28:27.079 pro golfer once who had a twenty plus year career on the tour, and 349 00:28:27.119 --> 00:28:30.759 he said me, I only won four times. It's like, wow, 350 00:28:30.960 --> 00:28:36.839 you won four times on the PGA Tour. But it was unsatisfying in a 351 00:28:36.960 --> 00:28:41.960 sense. Listening to him talk, I got the sense that it was unsatisfying 352 00:28:41.039 --> 00:28:49.079 after putting a life of work into it, and it wasn't fulfilled, beautifully 353 00:28:49.119 --> 00:28:53.880 said, right, Which it speaks so wonderfully into what we're talking about earlier, 354 00:28:53.960 --> 00:29:00.559 which is it's our perception of reality that generates our inner experience, you 355 00:29:00.599 --> 00:29:03.440 know, in the same way threat does. It's just like, you know, 356 00:29:03.519 --> 00:29:07.000 for somebody else, winning four times on the PGA in PGA pro events 357 00:29:07.119 --> 00:29:11.039 is just like it's amazing, Like I'm so fulfilled. It's the best thing 358 00:29:11.079 --> 00:29:15.440 that you know, I had a successful career, right, But for someone 359 00:29:15.480 --> 00:29:21.119 else who maybe has like this, Oh but I never reached my potential. 360 00:29:21.720 --> 00:29:23.319 Well now they're in a world of suffering. But the event's the event. 361 00:29:25.079 --> 00:29:30.400 Yeah, it's our perception, our context as it relates to the content of 362 00:29:30.480 --> 00:29:34.559 life that determines our experience. But what we don't realize is that context, 363 00:29:34.680 --> 00:29:41.319 that perception of life was built when we were children. You know, it 364 00:29:41.440 --> 00:29:45.240 might look like, you know, maybe he won a couple of tournaments in 365 00:29:45.319 --> 00:29:49.680 junior golf and his dad just said, you know, oh, haw'd your 366 00:29:49.759 --> 00:29:53.039 roundgo son, And he was like, ah, shot like a sixty nine, 367 00:29:53.359 --> 00:29:56.920 and you know he was like, okay, well how many shots did 368 00:29:56.960 --> 00:30:03.240 you leave out there? Right, a beautiful intention from a parent. We're 369 00:30:03.279 --> 00:30:04.720 not putting down parents, they're just doing the best they can. And you 370 00:30:04.720 --> 00:30:08.039 could hear probably in the father's words, how you know he just wants the 371 00:30:08.079 --> 00:30:11.880 best for his something. He just wants him to become the greatest expression of 372 00:30:11.960 --> 00:30:17.079 himself as it relates to golf. But here this little kid quickly learns that 373 00:30:17.799 --> 00:30:21.359 what I'm doing is not enough, and that then starts a pattern of a 374 00:30:21.400 --> 00:30:25.680 lifetime. So he can never actually reach that goal because it's never enough, 375 00:30:25.920 --> 00:30:30.160 because he'll keep perpetuating that until he realizes there was never anything wrong with him. 376 00:30:30.559 --> 00:30:33.559 Where he's at is where he's at, and what is achieved is beautiful, 377 00:30:34.079 --> 00:30:38.000 and that then gives rise to that feeling of just joy and fulfillment. 378 00:30:38.519 --> 00:30:42.039 But that's why we can never and I can just say never, never, 379 00:30:42.119 --> 00:30:49.000 never. We can't find fulfillment externally. It's just not possible one because the 380 00:30:49.039 --> 00:30:52.160 moment we get it is like the moment we start to be able to lose 381 00:30:52.160 --> 00:30:56.480 it, which then sets up a different fear. So it's all internal programming 382 00:30:57.119 --> 00:31:03.599 and we get to the side when we want to feel fulfilled, well said, 383 00:31:03.960 --> 00:31:08.519 thank you, I had to let a pause happen there. Let's take 384 00:31:08.559 --> 00:31:14.920 one more break and then we'll be back and figure out how this applies to 385 00:31:15.000 --> 00:31:26.480 us as recreational golfers. After this, we all most of us, maybe 386 00:31:26.480 --> 00:31:30.119 all of us, watch a lot of pro sports, and whether it's a 387 00:31:30.160 --> 00:31:37.880 major or a championship, we see that is the pinnacle of success. Like 388 00:31:37.160 --> 00:31:42.680 we did it. But when you take another step back, it's almost to 389 00:31:42.720 --> 00:31:47.759 say, Okay, that's over. You got to do it again. It's 390 00:31:47.799 --> 00:31:52.200 not over. It's just another tournament, another game, you know, and 391 00:31:52.599 --> 00:31:56.880 next game you can lose that game. It's winning the last game. It's 392 00:31:56.920 --> 00:32:05.119 winning, you know, if it's an championship series or winning a major you 393 00:32:05.240 --> 00:32:12.559 got, it's just it's not over. It's not reaching that pinnacle. It's 394 00:32:12.759 --> 00:32:16.319 accomplishing something, but you're not done. Still a long way to go. 395 00:32:19.319 --> 00:32:22.839 Yeah, you know, for me, that kind of speaks into that kind 396 00:32:22.839 --> 00:32:30.400 of mountaintop with no top, right. Yeah, it's really speaking into we 397 00:32:30.759 --> 00:32:36.839 set ourselves up for not feeling fulfilled when we have a view that where my 398 00:32:36.920 --> 00:32:42.400 happiness lies is in my future one because we can't be in it, right. 399 00:32:42.480 --> 00:32:46.559 So it's always you know, ahead of its in theory, but it's 400 00:32:46.640 --> 00:32:51.319 it's saying that my happiness isn't right here, and I prefer the word joy, 401 00:32:51.960 --> 00:32:55.680 right. So that really speaks into our definition of success, which is 402 00:32:55.799 --> 00:33:01.960 like, for sure, we it's beautiful to have a commitment to winning tournament 403 00:33:02.039 --> 00:33:06.880 after tournament after tournament. But you know, I think it was Jack Nicholas 404 00:33:06.920 --> 00:33:09.440 that said, I'm not going to use the quote because I'll butcher it and 405 00:33:09.799 --> 00:33:15.440 paraphrase it, but he basically was saying that one of the reasons he was 406 00:33:15.200 --> 00:33:19.119 so amazing at what he does, and that wouldn't have been his words, 407 00:33:19.359 --> 00:33:25.440 was because he made space for all outcomes is he could be okay with not 408 00:33:25.519 --> 00:33:34.640 winning because from that space he's actually free to play because otherwise you're needing a 409 00:33:34.680 --> 00:33:38.160 result in order to create a feeling within. And that's why I said before, 410 00:33:38.279 --> 00:33:42.799 my definition of success is, you know, being able to be with 411 00:33:42.920 --> 00:33:49.759 all circumstances, including tournament wins or not winning, and just to be able 412 00:33:49.799 --> 00:33:52.799 to maintain your peace, and I kind of add a little bit into there 413 00:33:52.839 --> 00:33:55.880 and move from the energy of love regardless of circumstance, which is a tool 414 00:33:55.960 --> 00:34:00.200 ask for the human beings when we want to make people wrong. But in 415 00:34:00.240 --> 00:34:05.559 the realm of performance and sports, it really is that ability to as you 416 00:34:05.559 --> 00:34:09.599 were saying to kind of to let go of the last tournament. It's great 417 00:34:09.639 --> 00:34:14.559 if we won, because you know, the perception is we're building confidence, 418 00:34:15.280 --> 00:34:21.320 But what if you just knew that confidence was there. What if you just 419 00:34:21.400 --> 00:34:25.760 knew that your talent was there. So for me, it's not about adding 420 00:34:25.840 --> 00:34:30.360 to us, it's actually a removal process. And it's sort of these like 421 00:34:31.159 --> 00:34:37.000 codes in the subconscious that give rise to feeling that we need to win rather 422 00:34:37.079 --> 00:34:43.320 than or we must win, because those will create pressure in language. If 423 00:34:43.320 --> 00:34:46.119 I need, I must, I have to Suddenly you know we're chasing, 424 00:34:46.800 --> 00:34:52.119 rather than I choose to. I get to because I love to go and 425 00:34:52.159 --> 00:34:58.440 play, but because I can be with all outcomes, I'm actually free to 426 00:34:58.519 --> 00:35:01.960 go play from a level of flow. And the irony is fred when people 427 00:35:02.039 --> 00:35:07.039 let go of all of this pressure, all of this tension, they just 428 00:35:07.079 --> 00:35:08.880 show up like they do in practice, and they just go smooth it down 429 00:35:08.960 --> 00:35:13.320 the fairway. They hit it to within a couple of inches and they just 430 00:35:13.880 --> 00:35:16.440 if that's that flow state, they're not trying, they're not forcing. And 431 00:35:16.440 --> 00:35:21.920 that's the difference between force and power. Yeah, I'm not interested in force. 432 00:35:21.960 --> 00:35:25.400 For my athletes, it's it's power. But they can be okay with 433 00:35:25.440 --> 00:35:30.519 the outcome regardless, and that is a powerful human being. How about those 434 00:35:30.519 --> 00:35:35.760 folks that are motivated by the pressure. It's like I have to broody this 435 00:35:35.840 --> 00:35:40.800 hole to win this and and you know, deliver at that point or the 436 00:35:40.880 --> 00:35:45.079 rest of us that's like yeah, yeah, if I if I don't part 437 00:35:45.119 --> 00:35:50.880 of this hole, I'm not going to shoot my best round and inevitably that's 438 00:35:50.920 --> 00:35:53.480 what's going to happen. Yeah, self fulfilling prophecy. Right, we were 439 00:35:53.559 --> 00:35:58.599 worried about a bad future that hasn't even happened yet, right, that's you 440 00:35:58.599 --> 00:36:00.480 know, that's what we bring the negatives into it, like, oh, 441 00:36:00.519 --> 00:36:06.039 this might happen, or this might happen, as opposed to just remembering the 442 00:36:06.079 --> 00:36:09.079 word is play. Yeah, yeah, it's a game, it is, 443 00:36:09.159 --> 00:36:12.960 and we take it so seriously and I get it, you know. So 444 00:36:13.119 --> 00:36:16.440 a couple of elements to what you said, which was so amazing. But 445 00:36:16.639 --> 00:36:22.920 it's speaking one into the future based conversation that we have, which is, 446 00:36:22.119 --> 00:36:25.800 you know, when you get to the root cause of that's that's anxiety, 447 00:36:25.920 --> 00:36:31.519 right, and that's on a continuum of like panic, terror, anxiety, 448 00:36:31.960 --> 00:36:37.800 maybe worry, fear, mild, concerned. So it's like on a continuum. 449 00:36:37.280 --> 00:36:42.840 But it's just like that's all future based conversations. But we create a 450 00:36:43.239 --> 00:36:46.559 circumstance. Our brain creates the circumstance. Oh, I better make that birdie, 451 00:36:47.000 --> 00:36:51.280 you know, otherwise you know, basically what we're saying, it's not 452 00:36:51.320 --> 00:36:54.280 going to go well for us, perceive fret. But this brain creates the 453 00:36:54.360 --> 00:37:02.000 scenario in our in our mind doesn't exist that that's mind tries to fix it, 454 00:37:02.039 --> 00:37:07.559 tries to overcome it, tries to avoid. So in essence, what 455 00:37:07.079 --> 00:37:13.679 we're actually scared of is our own imagination. So when I really got that, 456 00:37:13.760 --> 00:37:16.079 I like almost fell off my chair because I was like, oh, 457 00:37:16.159 --> 00:37:21.440 I'm making it. I'm making it up in essence, but that's where like 458 00:37:21.519 --> 00:37:25.280 our past is influencing our future. So like it's one of the masteries that 459 00:37:25.320 --> 00:37:30.199 I help people understand is their relationship to time. You started off the podcast 460 00:37:30.280 --> 00:37:36.159 by saying when you master your mind, or you master your relationship to life, 461 00:37:36.440 --> 00:37:39.000 whatever that is. This is a relationship to time. You know, 462 00:37:39.519 --> 00:37:44.960 past hurt. What I said before is informing our future. But if I 463 00:37:45.039 --> 00:37:51.800 deleted your memory, Fred, where's your problems? You're just they're just not 464 00:37:51.960 --> 00:37:55.000 there. So that gives a good indication as to how we're using our history 465 00:37:55.400 --> 00:38:00.920 to worry about the future. Right. And then the second part your question 466 00:38:00.159 --> 00:38:04.760 was I get it all of the time, and it's actually it's such a 467 00:38:04.800 --> 00:38:09.880 powerful question, which is you know what I've used like force and like force 468 00:38:10.360 --> 00:38:15.000 and pressure to get where I'm at. Where if I let that go, 469 00:38:15.199 --> 00:38:19.280 then you know, am I just what's going to happen to my performance? 470 00:38:19.280 --> 00:38:22.559 Because they've relied on that. You know, I get it in all different 471 00:38:22.639 --> 00:38:24.159 kinds of sports. It's like, oh, I'm going to put myself under 472 00:38:24.159 --> 00:38:28.760 that pressure and then I'll perform like it's force, there's no power there. 473 00:38:29.320 --> 00:38:34.679 So I open up people's minds to actually be just an invitation to be able 474 00:38:34.719 --> 00:38:40.400 to consider that actually that force based mentality of pressurizing yourself has actually been your 475 00:38:40.440 --> 00:38:46.559 block to a potential that is limitless. So it's actually a limitation, not 476 00:38:46.719 --> 00:38:52.000 something that's helped you because if you were in the arena of peace and freedom 477 00:38:52.039 --> 00:38:57.519 and flow, what could you have achieved? We don't know, but I 478 00:38:57.599 --> 00:39:01.639 actually assert you would have achieved way more than this pressure based container that we 479 00:39:01.679 --> 00:39:07.679 are we put ourselves in that we don't because it comes from our conditioning that's 480 00:39:07.679 --> 00:39:16.280 external. So hopefully yet a lot better in one question, so I'm curious. 481 00:39:16.719 --> 00:39:23.880 I you know, for many people in the northern Hemisphere, especially in 482 00:39:23.920 --> 00:39:29.199 the northeast United States, and I'm sure in the UK as well, the 483 00:39:29.239 --> 00:39:34.119 winter is a time where you just have to put your golf clubs away for 484 00:39:34.280 --> 00:39:39.079 a number of months. And for people who live in the Southern States and 485 00:39:39.280 --> 00:39:45.440 near the equator that get to play golf, or even in Australia places like 486 00:39:45.519 --> 00:39:52.360 that where you get to play twelve months a year, I'm wondering what the 487 00:39:52.440 --> 00:40:00.800 mental state if it offers an advantage when you take a number of months away 488 00:40:00.840 --> 00:40:07.719 from the sport, or is it the the regular or regularly playing weekly, 489 00:40:07.960 --> 00:40:14.119 monthly, however you play, how often you play, is that enforce it 490 00:40:14.280 --> 00:40:17.480 or does that break it down even further? Does that question make any sense? 491 00:40:17.880 --> 00:40:21.880 Yeah, yeah, totally, I get what you're asking Okay, okay, 492 00:40:21.880 --> 00:40:25.039 thank you, because I wasn't sure what I was. I knew where 493 00:40:25.039 --> 00:40:27.920 I wanted to go, but I'm not sure if I made it there. 494 00:40:28.000 --> 00:40:30.559 So now you did, or at least I got it from my how I 495 00:40:30.599 --> 00:40:37.559 was hearing it. So yeah, So for me, it's it's completely an 496 00:40:37.639 --> 00:40:45.920 individual process, you know, but there's that cop out, right For me, 497 00:40:45.599 --> 00:40:52.199 it really I would I would just instead of focusing on what somebody's doing, 498 00:40:52.480 --> 00:40:57.559 I would be looking at the energy that they're moving from. Right, 499 00:40:57.639 --> 00:41:05.679 So we could say consistent repetition is great for integrating something in somebody's swing. 500 00:41:05.920 --> 00:41:10.800 Yeah, maybe like perfecting the golf swing. There's no doubt in my mind 501 00:41:10.840 --> 00:41:15.199 that obviously the practice is necessary, right. We don't want to just go, 502 00:41:15.280 --> 00:41:20.480 oh, it's all mindset and there's no physical element. No, in 503 00:41:20.519 --> 00:41:24.119 my world, it's physical, psychological, emotional, energetic. Right, So 504 00:41:24.400 --> 00:41:30.599 from that standpoint, it's like there's a practice that's required of the physical. 505 00:41:31.320 --> 00:41:36.440 But then the reason why I said it's kind of individual, it's because it's 506 00:41:36.480 --> 00:41:42.400 based on their deeper inner world, as in their perception of life. So 507 00:41:42.519 --> 00:41:45.960 for some people, they're going to really benefit from a little bit of time 508 00:41:45.000 --> 00:41:51.440 out. Yeah, to be able to reset to pause. And what I 509 00:41:51.639 --> 00:41:55.559 prefer though, is instead of having these kind of extremes of long breaks and 510 00:41:55.599 --> 00:42:00.159 then intense practice, is to make it more a way of being where it's 511 00:42:00.159 --> 00:42:06.480 integrated. All of my athletes I shared with them the morning practice that for 512 00:42:06.559 --> 00:42:09.639 me, it's a non negotiable, like it's you know, at seven am 513 00:42:09.760 --> 00:42:15.239 here in Vietnam that I'm having this podcast call. But because of that though, 514 00:42:15.559 --> 00:42:19.719 I love my morning practice. It gets me into this beautiful frequency where 515 00:42:19.719 --> 00:42:22.320 I can show up as the best version of myself. And it's a non 516 00:42:22.320 --> 00:42:27.039 negotiable. So I was up at four you know, I get my movement 517 00:42:27.079 --> 00:42:30.599 in, I go through the mental process that it's just reminders for me, 518 00:42:30.760 --> 00:42:34.960 I do a little self study and I'm here and I feel pretty sharp with 519 00:42:35.000 --> 00:42:38.480 you right because of the energy that I'm in. So for that reason, 520 00:42:38.679 --> 00:42:43.159 I prefer to make it a way of being for my athletes or anyone that 521 00:42:43.199 --> 00:42:46.000 I'm working with, because I work with like the whole gamut of you know, 522 00:42:46.159 --> 00:42:51.800 people's experiences in different lives. But yeah, I would say, you 523 00:42:51.840 --> 00:42:54.480 know, to have that balance rather than the extremes is always going to be 524 00:42:54.880 --> 00:43:02.039 for me. What illicits just maximum performance beautiful. That's wonderful. How do 525 00:43:02.119 --> 00:43:07.559 people find you, get in touch with you? Follow you on the internet. 526 00:43:07.199 --> 00:43:10.239 Yeah, so I've been a little bit of a ninja these last kind 527 00:43:10.280 --> 00:43:15.199 of seven eight years of coaching, you know. So for me, doing 528 00:43:15.199 --> 00:43:20.639 these podcasts so fun. But to reach me, the most direct route is 529 00:43:20.719 --> 00:43:24.119 by my website, which is Gary Waters dot co dot uk. I am 530 00:43:24.159 --> 00:43:29.320 on Instagram. I just use that to put out free content because that's how 531 00:43:29.320 --> 00:43:31.760 I learned. When I got started, I didn't have the money to invest 532 00:43:31.800 --> 00:43:37.119 in the mentors I do now, which is just like I feel so lucky. 533 00:43:37.239 --> 00:43:39.679 So I put out information on my Instagram. I think you're on there, 534 00:43:39.719 --> 00:43:45.320 I follow you, I love your videos, and that's I am Gary 535 00:43:45.360 --> 00:43:49.519 Waters and that will take you to my page and people can check it out 536 00:43:49.599 --> 00:43:53.880 if it's if it resonates, And that's the letters I am Gary Waters, 537 00:43:54.239 --> 00:44:01.039 Yeah, Gary Waters as opposed to who I am? Yeah I am Gary 538 00:44:01.079 --> 00:44:07.480 Waters, Gary watas I am I am okay yeah, because Gary Waters was 539 00:44:07.480 --> 00:44:13.679 taken, I can't get it right. Track that guy down. I knowed 540 00:44:15.519 --> 00:44:21.880 in my way. Gary. It's been great talking to you. I really 541 00:44:21.920 --> 00:44:25.320 appreciate your time and having this conversation we've learned a lot. Thank you and 542 00:44:25.360 --> 00:44:29.199 yours. Fred. I just want to give you a reflection, like the 543 00:44:29.239 --> 00:44:32.079 work that you do is amazing. You know, so many people are benefiting 544 00:44:32.159 --> 00:44:36.920 from what you're sharing, the experts that you're connecting with, and I just 545 00:44:36.920 --> 00:44:39.800 want to thank you for your time because for me, that's the most precious 546 00:44:39.800 --> 00:44:45.719 resource that we have. My thanks to our newest Golf Smarter Ambassador, Lucas 547 00:44:45.840 --> 00:44:51.840 McEwan from Abbots for BC Canada. Lucas seems to be another listener who has 548 00:44:51.840 --> 00:44:55.119 a high quality microphone had wanted to record and send the file as opposed to 549 00:44:55.280 --> 00:45:00.039 just recording his episode opening by calling our toll free listener line. Nice job, 550 00:45:00.159 --> 00:45:07.280 Lucas, and with that he's received a free link to Tony Manzoni's video 551 00:45:07.360 --> 00:45:10.639 of the Loss Fundamental. I encourage you to become a Golf Smarter Ambassador with 552 00:45:10.679 --> 00:45:15.280 the incentive of getting a choice of three great gifts for your effort by telling 553 00:45:15.360 --> 00:45:20.119 us where you're from and where you play. Like Lucas, you can choose 554 00:45:20.119 --> 00:45:23.960 Tony Manzoni's video of Loss Fundamental, and other choices include a glove and glove 555 00:45:24.039 --> 00:45:30.239 storage compartment from Redroostergolf Dot com or our third newest option for you to choose 556 00:45:30.239 --> 00:45:37.079 as an eight pack of flight Path Golf tees at flightpathgolf dot com. Just 557 00:45:37.119 --> 00:45:40.800 write to me directly and I'll send you some simple instructions on how to record 558 00:45:40.880 --> 00:45:45.239 an episode opening that takes Oh, if it takes you a minute, I 559 00:45:45.320 --> 00:45:51.239 apologize for cutting into your day. Check out today's show notes to find links 560 00:45:51.280 --> 00:45:53.960 about each gift that you have to choose from, and if you have any 561 00:45:54.199 --> 00:45:59.880 questions, comments, suggestions for upcoming episodes, or want to join our list 562 00:45:59.880 --> 00:46:04.840 of golf Smarter Ambassadors who've received that free gift. Right to Golf Smarter Podcast 563 00:46:05.159 --> 00:46:08.519 at gmail dot com, or just click on the Heyfred button when you visit 564 00:46:08.599 --> 00:46:13.360 us at Golfsmarter dot com