WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.880 --> 00:00:05.040 I was a little bit annoyed. I like, you know, I love 2 00:00:05.080 --> 00:00:07.719 the Minnesota State Fair. I do. I love it. Yeah, I 3 00:00:07.799 --> 00:00:10.599 love the Minnesota State Fair. It is part of our culture and I love 4 00:00:10.599 --> 00:00:14.039 it and my go and we spend days at the fair and broadcast. But 5 00:00:14.119 --> 00:00:17.719 they did a State Fair preview I think yesterday or the day before, and 6 00:00:17.760 --> 00:00:21.760 they opened up some booth, they open up the giant slide, and it's 7 00:00:21.800 --> 00:00:25.120 like, no, I do not want to think about the State Fair when 8 00:00:25.120 --> 00:00:28.760 it's still May. Yeah, it's kind of like Christmas decorations going up in 9 00:00:28.839 --> 00:00:33.240 July. I don't. I love Christmas. Everybody loves Christmas. I love 10 00:00:33.320 --> 00:00:37.840 the State Fair. I don't want to see my friends posting themselves on the 11 00:00:37.840 --> 00:00:40.920 giant slide with a fucking corn dog in their hand. I don't want to 12 00:00:40.920 --> 00:00:43.280 see it. I don't. I don't. I love you, State Fair, 13 00:00:43.560 --> 00:00:48.920 but I don't want I love my wife, but I don't want to 14 00:00:48.920 --> 00:00:54.799 see her. I don't want to see her until State Fair time. Just 15 00:00:54.960 --> 00:00:56.880 what do you think? Am I wrong about that one? Okay? There 16 00:00:56.880 --> 00:00:59.479 we go. Well I didn't see anyone post about it, so it didn't 17 00:00:59.520 --> 00:01:02.320 bother me. Okay, I always thought a few I mean, you know, 18 00:01:03.960 --> 00:01:06.680 Chris Shaffer, who's a buddy of mine. So media people, yeah, 19 00:01:06.760 --> 00:01:07.519 media people, yeah. But I think there were some other people that 20 00:01:07.599 --> 00:01:14.439 went to Okay, that's kind of a group therapy ish kind of one. 21 00:01:14.480 --> 00:01:19.359 So I'm gonna skip past that one and go up to some unread Minnesota goodbyes 22 00:01:19.400 --> 00:01:23.680 and see what we have. Here's one sets Father's Day. Hello, my 23 00:01:23.719 --> 00:01:27.920 favorite morning show weird question. I somewhat recently started dating a guy with a 24 00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:32.280 kid. I have not met the kid, nor do I think it'll happen 25 00:01:32.319 --> 00:01:34.480 in the near future. It is necessary to get my boyfriend a Father's Day 26 00:01:34.480 --> 00:01:38.359 gift, or do I wish? I'm happy Father's Day. We've been dating 27 00:01:38.359 --> 00:01:41.280 for five months, but a situation is a bit dicey, so we don't 28 00:01:41.280 --> 00:01:45.079 talk about it often. I just don't know what the proper etiquette is in 29 00:01:45.120 --> 00:01:49.120 this situation. Any advice is greatly appreciated. That is from Aaron. I 30 00:01:49.239 --> 00:01:53.000 say you can get either way, is correct? I'd say no, only 31 00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:57.040 because you haven't met the kid. And if you say it's kind of dicey, 32 00:01:57.040 --> 00:02:00.159 you don't even talk about that often. No, Once you become like 33 00:02:00.439 --> 00:02:04.799 more integrated in the life and he and maybe you see the kid than yes, 34 00:02:04.879 --> 00:02:08.000 I would say so because the X probably won't get him anything. And 35 00:02:08.280 --> 00:02:13.759 it's nice like I would get stuff for like a card and like a pair 36 00:02:13.800 --> 00:02:17.639 of socks or something very early on for Dylan to give Jake just we had 37 00:02:17.680 --> 00:02:23.400 something little together. Yea. Yeah. But and I've even given Dylan like 38 00:02:23.400 --> 00:02:25.039 a card, I'm like a gift card for Starbucks to give his mom for 39 00:02:25.159 --> 00:02:29.439 Mother's Day. But now he's old enough that he can like sometimes grab his 40 00:02:29.479 --> 00:02:32.319 own stuff. Yeah. I think as a father, I would not be 41 00:02:32.400 --> 00:02:38.719 offended if you did or did not. So if you gave me a card 42 00:02:38.759 --> 00:02:40.319 and gave me like a you know, a Chipotle gift card, I'd be 43 00:02:40.319 --> 00:02:42.919 like, oh, that's cool, thank you very much. But if you 44 00:02:42.960 --> 00:02:45.280 did not, I would be you know, as a father, I would 45 00:02:45.280 --> 00:02:49.000 be like, either way, I like you, not for your gifts, 46 00:02:49.039 --> 00:02:53.719 but for you hopefully. Hello Dave Thalon Jenny Drake, been loving your show 47 00:02:53.719 --> 00:02:57.439 for the longest time. But let's dive in. Okay. The listener that 48 00:02:57.520 --> 00:03:01.240 wrote in to ask if it was okay for her to ask someone to throw 49 00:03:01.280 --> 00:03:05.879 her a sprinkle for baby number two, No way. Kids are expensive. 50 00:03:07.319 --> 00:03:10.240 So when I got pregnant. The second time around, we found out it 51 00:03:10.319 --> 00:03:14.719 was two wins. Oh God, I guess what. We still bought everything 52 00:03:14.759 --> 00:03:17.719 we needed at times too, because it's our responsibility to My sister in law 53 00:03:17.800 --> 00:03:21.840 did do a diaper shower for us. It was done virtually. People sent 54 00:03:21.919 --> 00:03:24.400 diapers via Target or Amazon, but that was all and we didn't ask for 55 00:03:24.479 --> 00:03:30.039 it. She volunteered, so we accepted because with twins there is that extra 56 00:03:30.120 --> 00:03:34.360 overwhelmed factor that I think people understand. So it was nice to not have 57 00:03:34.400 --> 00:03:37.360 to buy diapers for the first six months of their lives. Life is expensive, 58 00:03:37.400 --> 00:03:39.680 daycare is expensive. We don't go to restaurants, we don't take vacations, 59 00:03:39.919 --> 00:03:44.000 we buy secondhand, and we live simply. So I think you know, 60 00:03:44.080 --> 00:03:47.439 there is another gentle answer to the person who asked whether it was okay 61 00:03:47.439 --> 00:03:52.120 if she requested a sprinkle a baby sprinkle. Yeah, I was not going 62 00:03:52.199 --> 00:03:53.879 to dave about that. I'm like, I don't want to go in on 63 00:03:53.960 --> 00:03:58.120 this girl because you're she If she emailed the Minnesota Goodbye, that means she 64 00:03:58.240 --> 00:04:01.039 listens and is a big enough and listen to our podcast, and I'm like, 65 00:04:01.520 --> 00:04:03.800 I want to be respectful of her, Like I hope I don't know. 66 00:04:03.840 --> 00:04:05.599 It bothered me a little bit yesterday I was like, I hope I 67 00:04:05.639 --> 00:04:09.800 didn't come across and hurt her feelings. I hope, Like, I hope 68 00:04:09.840 --> 00:04:13.360 I didn't know. I say that all the time because I think that I'm 69 00:04:13.400 --> 00:04:16.360 the biggest listener advocate that you're going to find in radio, because I think 70 00:04:16.399 --> 00:04:19.839 I used to be a radio fan I still am, and a lot of 71 00:04:19.920 --> 00:04:27.800 radio people treat radio people listeners as a number or a nuisance even and that 72 00:04:27.879 --> 00:04:30.600 really pisses me off. To me, people who listen are people, and 73 00:04:30.639 --> 00:04:36.959 I always have said if people care enough to email the show, they absolutely 74 00:04:38.040 --> 00:04:43.519 are big fans. Next one, I'm a pediatric sleep consultant, so I 75 00:04:43.560 --> 00:04:47.000 have to add. So I have to add for all the moms out there 76 00:04:47.040 --> 00:04:50.639 expecting number two with a toddler, do not kick your toddler out of their 77 00:04:50.680 --> 00:04:54.959 crib just because another baby is coming along. For the headache you cause yourself, 78 00:04:55.439 --> 00:04:59.040 you will wish you just purchase another crib. This is not a good 79 00:04:59.160 --> 00:05:01.560 enough reason to put it toddler into a big bed, big kid bed before 80 00:05:01.600 --> 00:05:06.199 they are development able to understand the freedom of it. Plus, a new 81 00:05:06.240 --> 00:05:10.879 sibling tends to trigger a sleep regression for toddlers. You don't want to be 82 00:05:11.000 --> 00:05:14.199 dealing with that on top of trying to keep them in their toddler bed. 83 00:05:14.839 --> 00:05:16.720 Remember your baby will be in a bassinette for the first few months. Anyway, 84 00:05:16.720 --> 00:05:19.360 borrow a crib from a friend. Gets something cheap, It doesn't need 85 00:05:19.399 --> 00:05:24.399 to be pinterest worthy. I give this advice to my clients all the time. 86 00:05:24.519 --> 00:05:29.360 Keep them in a crib as long as possible, ideally until age three. 87 00:05:29.680 --> 00:05:31.120 Okay, that's all I've got. Have a great day, Steph. 88 00:05:31.199 --> 00:05:35.279 I really I think that's so interesting because it comes up on the show recurring 89 00:05:36.279 --> 00:05:40.879 kids that want to sleep with parents, and I think it maybe it starts 90 00:05:40.879 --> 00:05:44.120 when you put them in a toddler bed. Now they have the freedom to 91 00:05:44.160 --> 00:05:46.879 get in and out of the bed, They're going to come to you and 92 00:05:46.920 --> 00:05:50.199 want to sleep with you. Maybe our kids never slept with us, but 93 00:05:50.279 --> 00:05:55.000 I know somebody in my family that's slept with his mom and dad or his 94 00:05:55.079 --> 00:06:00.439 sister until he was eleven years old. I don't know if Olive is first 95 00:06:00.480 --> 00:06:01.560 of all all of I think, is too scared to leave her room. 96 00:06:02.240 --> 00:06:05.519 Okay, so we watch her on the monitor. Sometimes she will get out 97 00:06:05.519 --> 00:06:09.120 of bed and we're like, where did she go? But she just went 98 00:06:09.160 --> 00:06:11.600 to get a book off the bookshelf and then she comes back to her bed. 99 00:06:12.079 --> 00:06:15.279 She doesn't leave her room, and we're lucky. That's that's a good 100 00:06:15.319 --> 00:06:18.199 kid that's unusually doesn't well. I honestly think it's because so we don't have 101 00:06:18.240 --> 00:06:21.639 a basement. We have one of those houses where we don't have an upstairs 102 00:06:23.399 --> 00:06:25.800 like you. I don't know what's it called, like a walk out kind 103 00:06:25.839 --> 00:06:29.120 of floor. Yeah, I don't know. So it's not technically a level. 104 00:06:29.160 --> 00:06:30.319 I don't know. Yeah, maybe it's technically because it's a rambler. 105 00:06:30.600 --> 00:06:34.519 So it's there's no upstairs and like you do go downstairs from the main floor, 106 00:06:34.879 --> 00:06:39.560 but the downstairs is on ground level. Yeah, on ground level, 107 00:06:39.600 --> 00:06:43.120 So all of bedroom is on ground level. But anyway, it's still dark 108 00:06:43.160 --> 00:06:45.600 because I think she's scared to like leave her room to come find us. 109 00:06:45.639 --> 00:06:48.040 Honestly, it could be is she on a floor that's different from your floor? 110 00:06:48.160 --> 00:06:50.720 Yeah? See, now that's weird to me. And I'm not faulting 111 00:06:50.720 --> 00:06:56.000 anybody. I'm just saying that's weird to me because and I know with a 112 00:06:56.040 --> 00:07:00.839 baby bonneit or it doesn't make much difference. But I've always had my kids 113 00:07:00.839 --> 00:07:03.279 just across the hallway from me, and that's very comforting. And when I 114 00:07:03.319 --> 00:07:05.879 was a kid, my mom and dad were down the hall from me. 115 00:07:08.639 --> 00:07:13.160 But I like, Okay, we've expired that topic. Let's move on, 116 00:07:13.600 --> 00:07:17.879 Hello, says Nicole. I was listening to the Minnesota Goodbye episode where Dave 117 00:07:17.920 --> 00:07:23.399 talked about advocating for talking about mental strength, and that was a couple of 118 00:07:23.480 --> 00:07:27.600 days ago. I said, you know, mental health is so important. 119 00:07:27.959 --> 00:07:30.399 Work on your mental strength. And I said, this is not something I 120 00:07:30.399 --> 00:07:33.959 read somewhere. I came up with it myself because I think that it's important 121 00:07:34.000 --> 00:07:38.800 to the same way we take care of our body and train and work on 122 00:07:39.160 --> 00:07:43.160 bone density and muscle strength and fitness and cardio, to work on your mental 123 00:07:43.160 --> 00:07:46.079 strength and whatever that is to you. I completely agree. There have been 124 00:07:46.120 --> 00:07:49.319 many struggles I've encountered in life that have put me in a depressed mood. 125 00:07:50.199 --> 00:07:55.360 I had my pity party for one and moved on. I continued to move 126 00:07:55.360 --> 00:07:59.839 on by using my mental strength. It has put me in a better position 127 00:07:59.839 --> 00:08:01.720 to be a better mom for my kids as well. I started to go 128 00:08:01.759 --> 00:08:05.000 for a walk or worked out or even something as easy as going outside. 129 00:08:05.079 --> 00:08:09.839 I too believe we all have it in us. I try to look for 130 00:08:09.920 --> 00:08:13.560 positives in my life instead of focusing on the bad things that I am going 131 00:08:13.560 --> 00:08:16.680 through at that moment. Love your show from Nicole. Yeah, some people 132 00:08:16.759 --> 00:08:20.560 agree with us, Nicole, and some people don't. And that's you're right, 133 00:08:20.600 --> 00:08:22.560 because I can't say this is what should work for everybody. If it 134 00:08:22.639 --> 00:08:24.680 was that, then everyone would do it, you know, if it was 135 00:08:24.720 --> 00:08:28.480 like that easy for everyone, right, So thank you. Let's move on 136 00:08:28.480 --> 00:08:33.600 to the next one. This one again it goes on to and we don't 137 00:08:33.600 --> 00:08:37.320 want to put this woman on blast. So if you're listening, I hope 138 00:08:37.320 --> 00:08:41.159 you understand these are just people's opinions about your question, not an opinion about 139 00:08:41.240 --> 00:08:46.720 you, So don't take this personally about the baby sprinkle. Falon, I 140 00:08:46.720 --> 00:08:48.679 want to say you're completely right in your opinion regards to the baby sprinkle. 141 00:08:48.759 --> 00:08:52.840 I had this same reaction. Congrats to the emailer for having another kid. 142 00:08:52.879 --> 00:08:58.120 That's exciting, but you should not worry about being ripped for it, fallon 143 00:08:58.200 --> 00:09:01.240 as many of us are struggling and have chosen to not have another kid due 144 00:09:01.240 --> 00:09:03.879 to not being able to afford it. I feel like many will agree with 145 00:09:03.919 --> 00:09:09.600 you. Have a wonderful Memorial Day weekend off to you all. That is 146 00:09:09.639 --> 00:09:13.919 from Melissa. Yeah, and I think I will only say that. You 147 00:09:13.960 --> 00:09:16.039 know, maybe it's she might not have had that baby on purpose, she 148 00:09:16.120 --> 00:09:20.080 might have thought that in her cycle that she was not going to have a 149 00:09:20.080 --> 00:09:22.960 baby at that time, or sure her birth control might have failed, or 150 00:09:24.480 --> 00:09:28.759 you know, you never know, so but I yeah, okay. Last 151 00:09:28.799 --> 00:09:35.919 one David fallon regarding mental strength, You don't know how you will truly behave 152 00:09:35.960 --> 00:09:39.080 or act in a situation until you're in one. I went through a cancer. 153 00:09:39.480 --> 00:09:41.600 I went through cancer a few years ago, and I'm doing well. 154 00:09:43.080 --> 00:09:46.639 This sounds cliche, but I was strong because there wasn't any option and I 155 00:09:46.679 --> 00:09:50.279 had a mostly positive attitude about it. That doesn't mean it wasn't what I 156 00:09:50.279 --> 00:09:56.399 thought it would be. That doesn't mean it wasn't what I thought would be 157 00:09:56.440 --> 00:09:58.960 the most difficult stage in my life. Fast forward two years post cancer, 158 00:10:00.279 --> 00:10:05.039 my husband and I fifteen years together, hit an extremely rough patch. It 159 00:10:05.200 --> 00:10:09.799 got so bad I started looking for apartments. I was extremely depressed and was 160 00:10:09.840 --> 00:10:16.000 to the point of considering suicide. Oh my gosh, I knew I wasn't 161 00:10:16.039 --> 00:10:18.840 in the right frame of mind, and I reminded myself that I didn't fight 162 00:10:20.000 --> 00:10:24.240 hard to beat my cancer to have this be my outcome. I received help, 163 00:10:24.600 --> 00:10:30.519 and my husband and I eventually worked things out. When I think about 164 00:10:30.519 --> 00:10:33.000 my major struggles and mental strength, I would say the source of the stress 165 00:10:33.120 --> 00:10:37.399 is a major factor, and while you can be mentally strong in one struggle, 166 00:10:37.840 --> 00:10:43.519 you may need more help in the other. I totally agree peanut allergy 167 00:10:43.519 --> 00:10:46.519 post on Facebook, get a Life. I'm not sure what she's referring to, 168 00:10:46.600 --> 00:10:50.240 but I think she's making a joke about if people get so offended and 169 00:10:50.320 --> 00:10:54.320 say they're depressed because you posted something about like peanuts and they have a peanut 170 00:10:54.360 --> 00:10:58.120 allergy. Oh, okay, gotcha, Okay, thanks for real struggles. 171 00:10:58.120 --> 00:11:03.039 You need a positive, an effective coping mechanism, and mental strength. Always 172 00:11:03.120 --> 00:11:05.159 please seek help if you need it. And her name is Betty, and 173 00:11:05.240 --> 00:11:11.159 Betty I love that name because that was Susan's mom's name. But I say 174 00:11:11.159 --> 00:11:18.440 you really hit something because while you were able to mentally handle your cancer battle, 175 00:11:18.159 --> 00:11:22.240 which seemingly would be the most difficult, yeah, the relationship battle was 176 00:11:22.279 --> 00:11:26.879 the one that almost puts you over the edge. Isn't that interesting because for 177 00:11:26.919 --> 00:11:31.799 example, I mean some people, I'll pick out a random life crisis if 178 00:11:31.879 --> 00:11:37.320 you if your dog gets hit by a car and that's your dog, and 179 00:11:37.559 --> 00:11:41.120 that might put somebody over the edge. But somebody else might you know, 180 00:11:41.360 --> 00:11:45.279 have to have heart surgery and they'll have a really good attitude and everything's going 181 00:11:45.320 --> 00:11:48.080 to be different, you know what I mean. Right, So that's a 182 00:11:48.080 --> 00:11:50.279 really good point, Betty, thanks for bringing that up. And that is 183 00:11:50.320 --> 00:11:52.840 it? Anything else you want to talk about? Fallon? No? I 184 00:11:52.879 --> 00:11:56.919 think, have a great holiday weekend. And next week is the thousandth episode 185 00:11:56.919 --> 00:11:58.720 of Minnesota Goodbye. I'm a little bummed because I won't be here for it, 186 00:11:58.759 --> 00:12:03.960 but enjoy I think next Wednesday or Thursday. So that's crazy. Thank 187 00:12:03.000 --> 00:12:07.879 you for listening. Send those emails to Ryan's show at KDWB dot com, 188 00:12:07.879 --> 00:12:09.720 and have a good weekend.