Hey, a little slow but whatever whatever, Rodin come come, what was
it wrapt? I forgot what I was a ractor. It doesn't it doesn't
matter. Welcome to the Star Tank Podcast. Robins, Welcome, Welcome,
Welcome to Start Tank Podcast. Uh uh, Spiritual, you're right there.
You're right there. Bro No, no, I need help. Neo you
do you give it off? A b A big neal wife, a big
red. Because I was late today because I had to go to the bank
for like, to run an errand, and then I went to go get
some food. And then some homeless guy was at the place that I was
getting food, threatening to beat up the guy who owned the place. He's
like, come out here, come out here, seammy, let's fight,
come out here. And some kid was like, bro, it's eleven AM.
I was thinking, like, how are you fighting at a How are
you if if the clock says am and it's bright out, you should not
be fighting people, man, Like, that's that's your first hint that things
are wrong. Only fight to survive at that moment. You don't fight for
pleasure. That's a survival. That's just the people are always on the clock,
man, They're always on the clock. Yeah, you gotta watch,
especially if I beat your ass anytime Dato beat your ass. Bro, you
gotta be careful of the shirts. He walked in there. Yeah, dude,
he walked in there with like a bucket and he was like, yeah,
I'll pay you back double. I'll pay you back double. And the
guy was like, get the funk out the hit man, What the hell
are you doing here? You can't I'm getting pissed off, man. And
then he calls some guy. He's like, you got to come down here,
man, we got this cycle over here. I can't have this.
Man, I pay eight thousand dollars rent here. I don't want to deal
with this ship. And uh, because it's crazy, Okay, I mean
it's a business to be fair. Yeah, but that's like, wonder how
big the business is, because that's that sounds. It's a small. It's
a small Like, I mean, they got they got some good foot traffic
there. They're they're real. They're really the only diner and walking distance over
here, so like they get a lot of they're pretty good. Yeah,
the one the one that everybody goes to, the one that we all go
to. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know what I'm not gonna say
because I don't want to, you know, draw you don't want to draw
more homeless people over there. I get it. Our tremendously large homeless audience
would would they would keep advantage of that? I wonder how many homeless people?
How would you feel if we found out? Yeah, ho would you
feel if we found out that like they like actually like not even just like
a lot, like seventy percent of our audience. I would be so confused.
It would be fun if there was a pipeline. What if there was
a snark tan to homeless pipeline that was very very very evident as soon as
you look into it, like like it's statistically undeniable, everybody you eventually become
homeless. Yeah, that's just and that's just like that's just ninety or that
that's like seventy percent of our just our listeners, but one hundred percent of
our patrons are in fact homeless. That's crazy. Would keep giving me your
money though, like yeah, yeah, hey man, if as long as
you can keep doing that, it's all good. It can't be that bad.
It can't be that bad if you're still giving us money. That would
be so like, I don't know how I would react to that if somebody
was like genuinely destitute, like sincerely, but then they were like, well,
I got to donate to this Patreon though, because they're making some killer
stuff. Have you seen gatio Active? That video still gets traffic, by
the way, like like it's like I saw people tag me and things where
it like it was in their recommendeds which is wild because I feel like that
doesn't happen for videos like that every I was mentioning at my friends at Mick,
a friend of mine, I was. I was over his house the
other day and I got an email, the same email that I get every
single day from from YouTube that says limited. It says, the email is
always this limited to no ads remain on your video, and it will be
like a snark Tank episode. It's every every single time. It'll just be
and then the title of it will be like Bertie Sanders says the gamer word,
and it's like, yeah, I bet that one got to monetize.
Yeah, that makes sense. I mean I think we have podcast. I
think we have three modetized episode that many. There was one that I was
surprised recently that was monetized. I think it was the one. Oh my
god, I'm pretty sure it was the YouTube prankster one, like where the
guy shot a YouTube prankster and that one has that fucking thing on it,
and I'm like, are you serious? The one that I'm like, obviously
it's not gonna be greenlit, Like that just pissed me off so much and
is still so funny because what kind of what kind of gun wielding demon?
They like, that's not the right reaction, that is not the you don't
do that. Yeah, it's like the worst reaction possible. But also many
people, it's the amount of people, the amount of people, it's just
like, okay, just something. This is somewhat related. Israel AA Sonia.
He got pulled over for driving on the influence. Everybody was shitting all
over him, like, dude, what's wrong with you? You're so rich,
why can't you have a driver. Obviously I totally agree with that.
Derek Lewis just got pulled over this week for driving one hundred and thirty something
miles an hour in a fifty in his Lambeau and then everyone's like, well,
I mean you gotta go fast your lambo bro. Like everyone's like the
vibe is so different where I'm like, this guy could have ran over several
people. And everyone's like, well, I mean, nigga's got a Lambo,
how are you gonna drive that shit fifty miles an hour? And I
was like, he could have ran over someone and an attempt to slow down
after running over that guy, he could have ran over to several more.
One hundred and thirty months I went. I once rented, because this is
what you do when you rent a car, right, everybody knows you reant
a car, you beat the shit out of it. I ran a Chevy
Colpot one time, and I'm like, obviously what this thing can do.
I'm fucking all the time on the ten Freeway. I got ten miles an
hour. It's just shaking, and I'm like, all right, I'm scared.
I just love this this one time. This is a fucking horrible story.
So I was at the summer camp and we were on the white Stone
Bridge at like, maybe the white Stone is by where you're from, right,
No, white Stone is going to Long Island. What is the bridge
over by where you're from? Chris? The Yonkers one, the one from
the Greater New York City to Yonkers, Upstate, Tap and Z Is it
tappen Z Is it Tappensz Bridge? It might have been that one. That's
the only bridge. That's the only person I remember from my childhood knowing the
name of because everything else is just kind of arbitrary. We were over there
and we were going back to the camp, and my camp counsel was like,
yeah, I'm just crazy. And we were driving out one hundred and
fifteen miles per hour in a van, in a van full of kids,
and it was to the point where so fast and the car looked slow.
It was not enough variety of changing outside window, and I was like,
if this motherfucker hits a bump, if a car decides to pull too close,
so there's a rock that's a little too steps upright, We're all Dad
and I just sat down in the car quietly looking around. Are you talking
about the Are you talking about the Henry Hudson? Is the Henry Hudson?
Didn't? I don't. I don't remember which bridge it is. I just
don't remember. That's only that's the only Yonkers Bridge that I can that I
might have been Henry Hudson. This was the camp. The camp was located
in Irvington, but we would go to the city that I hang out have
fun for the summer. It wasn't anyway. What is that? What does
it matter? Like? What even is that? Like? Every time I
hear that word, it's a real place? Younger there is an extension of
like New York City. It's like it's like Mount Vernon. Yonkers are the
just exiting New York City place. What is the what? What fucking person?
What is is is that? What is Yonkers? I mean the word
is a name, Like it just doesn't sound real as even as a young
boy, I'm like I hear youngers, I'm like, that just sounds like
some clown ship. I don't know, like youngers. It's like, like
like you it is. It does sound like just like a silly clown word.
It's so it's so funny because it's desensitized to me. It's just like
I've always because it's just like where I was from, silly when you think
about outside of that context, I've never I've never asked. I'm like,
Oh, here's some New Yorkers, I ask them, what what is younger
there? There's like there's like a lot of weird history there, like Ela
Fitzgerald and like Steven Tyler and like DMX and they see all these people are
from you. I knew I know this because people there don't shut up about
it. I think the first time I ever really focused on that word,
like actually focused on it was when Tyler the creator dropped that track Yonkers,
and it made me think about it more. I'm like, what the fuck
is yonkers? It's just such an interesting word. It's yeah, it's like
you got prized or something like Yonkers. You know, the Yonkers they were
called They're called Yonkers with a U before uh huh, and that is pretty
much a referring to the southern portion of the Bronx. People that said within
that area were the Yonkers. Basically, as far as I know, like
Yonkers was just like like a place where like a lot of growing out there.
I remember hearing a lot about like how it was like really big for
like inventors around that time, like around like around the time that it was
settled. It was a lot of like like science people kind of living there
and like the inventing ship. Like I don't know what the fuck that really
means, yeah, because I didn't care about it, but but yeah,
I don't know it doesn't matter. It's it's not important. I like it
over there, but like also like I would never go back. I would
never like live there again. Once I got a nice house. M If
I can get a nice house in Youngers, I wouldn't mind. But I
don't know anything. Whatever. It's so it doesn't matter that it is so
foreign to me. I remember seeing it. I remember seeing it in Fucking
Spider Man ps. Four because there's like a level in Grand Central Station where
like and you can see like where the where the trains are going, and
I remember saying, it's like, this is the first time I think I've
ever seen youkers mentioned in anything that wasn't younkers. That was It was very
crazy, I guess. M yeah, the fact that I made a song
about the fact that mean because yonkers means y'all, what you call it means
gentlemen. It means the young gentleman. A younger is a gentle young gentleman.
I guess that's why the inventors. I guess that's why I like it's
like an inventor, because it called the junkers, the junkers before the junkers.
It means the young gentleman. What they yeah, it's I don't want
clown there, but the clown's got molested very deeply there, and fucking I
know what's over there, ed Ground Poe's house or whatever the fuck? Oh
yeah, I remember taking a field trip to to egg Ground Poe's house or
something in like Catholic school or something. There's a bunch of assholes there,
just a bunch of dickheads hanging around like it was school. There's no there
are people who. It's so funny though, because it's like that really is
just something that people are because I was in Catholic school where you couldn't really
express yourself at all. I mean you could really. It was like it
was like New York Catholic school. It wasn't like fucking Mississippi where they're gonna
they're gonna, we're gonna take you with the fucking they're gonna take you over
the altar and come on you and ring you dry afterwards. But you know,
but but it was I don't know, you could you met certain people
there, and you like, even though they were in like a like a
very clear Catholic uniform and they didn't have make on, you could just be
like you're a goth person. Yeah, I know it. I know it,
like I can just tell just by your by your fucking phenotype or whatever.
Yeah, I knew it. Even back then, I knew. I
knew it. You're too god, you're too gaunt not to be a goth.
Really they need really man, and it's like you're gone, you're a
goth. And he's like, you know, I'm magnetically drawn to you.
That's how I know. But shut up the I can't remember the last time
I rented a car, Like, I hate renting cars because they're so fucking
I don't know. They never have the car that I asked for. It's
never like it's always like I'm sorry, I know you reserve this thing,
but would you take a Jeep? And it's like, I don't want to
fucking jeep? Are you insane? When I was like younger, I used
to rent cars just to try them out. So I would I would try
out like really like out there car. I remember I drove like a I
think I I've rented one time when I went back to New York. I
got this big white like a like a not a six door Jeep, but
it might as well have been, you know, what I mean, like
those long like it was basically a hummer, just because I was like,
I was like, I'm curious what it's like to drive one of these,
and it was just like not fun at all. It was. It was
terrible. It feels nice to be able to run over niggas man like sometimes
you just like you're like a powerful and you just I was in I think
I got it. I got it purely to have sex in a in a
big car. I don't have good do you have a big car? In
general? I miss h. I just saw an old photo of my Ford
Explorer and uh it it fucking it died a few years ago and I was
like, damn, I missed that. Like just it's just good for everything
you can. You can pull over and bang in it, you can store
extra shit in it, your house blows up, you can sleep in it.
It's just like I have a fucking Fiesta right now. This thing is
just a little bit bigger than my penis, Like it's it's tiny, dude,
slightly asked car. I have a massive cock though, but this is
his car? Is my cock is a six door? The uh that's insane?
Is a cylinder carrying that thing around, Like where did you even where?
Even? You know? How you how you fold up a map?
You gotta do that to your penis. Bro Anyway, nothing interesting happened as
far as I'm aware. So we're gonna go into some questions. We got
a lot of questions over see what I named the episode on Patreon? What
did you say? Check it out? Let me check it out right now?
Let me read it. Let me read it for you, the most
recent episode. No, no, let me hear. Is it really you
just named it rip Matthew Perry for real? Yeah, look a look at
it. This episode we talk about some N word that drowned in the fucking
hot tub. You really, you're the worst person I've been. I've been
battling. I've been battling what I was going to put for the thumbnail for
a minute because I was like, Okay, how do I not be you?
Huh do you? What's the next? Uh? This? Then?
Uh? Really ahead of time? Yeah, that's already seen it. Well
they have already seen it, true, man, that is true. But
yeah, it's the Matthew Perry one that I need in the thumbnail. Literally
that's coming up today. Uh, it's because it's just like, all right,
I want to be respectful, but at the same time, you know
you should just you should just call it this, call it what what it's
called. But then just put find a photo of somebody who looks almost like
Matthew Berry but not quite you know what I mean. Put the or put
the image of him spitting up water from the Friends. So I was thinking,
because here's the thing perfect out any context, I think it would be
okay. Like so I was thinking of doing like kind of opaque. It's
a little transparent, but then there's a bigger picture of him looking respectable.
But then in like very transparent in the background with like maybe like forty percent
opcity, you can see him spitting the water out. But I feel like
without context, it's it's respectable. If you don't know what it's, it's
respectable as long as you don't understand he's just thinking. Maybe you're just thinking
because that's oh, that's iconic. It's the opening friends theme and he like
spits other thing that's cute. And then there's us where we know why we
will Is it too much? Is it too much? Is it too much
to take the friend's logo and just kind of like erase, like just make
it say end. You know what I mean? You know what I mean?
Like is that I mean to just layer its R and I end.
I think that's kind of funny. But that's not bad. It's actually pretty
good. I think I think I'm gonna work it out. I'm gonna work
it out. Yeah, episode of him swimming right, Shut up, shut
up, listen, let's just move on. I'm trying to get to these
questions here. I'm not trying to disrespect. Yeah, not using it.
I am not using it. You can put one. Let this by the
way, let me be and I want to see it. Okay, I'll
go and photo for that. Let this be a full on confirmation to the
audience that when he's a horrible as horrible as like, he pretends like I
edit him to be like the worst person and this is just him. No,
this is just him, bro, this is I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I'm always the one that has a respect people die. I'm one that
unanimously respects it for the most part. Shut the funk up. But I
don't feel anything for him at all. I feel nothing for this man.
That is one of the few times where I can be freely as as apathetic
as I can. All Right, all right, all right, let's move
on. I got questions. All right, we have pat We have questions
that are are our wonderful audience over at Patriot, our entirely homeless audience at
patreon dot COM's last snark tank sends us and we we we greatly appreciate them.
So we're gonna read their their little comments. This is I don't I
don't have an answer to this, but it got me. This question I
have no answer to, but it got me thinking about a really interesting premise,
so I wanted to run it by you, guys. Ned Erdie or
a ned Erdy wrote in he says, high, Cosmo, Wanda and one
Decimo. Remember that Tim Allen movie The Santa Claus, where where Tim Allen
kills Santa Claus and then transmographies into Santa over the course of a year.
My question is if you had to kill kill and then become Santa, what
would you do? I actually I don't have an answer to the question,
but it got me thinking about, like, how would you like what if
this extended to pe like figures beyond Santa Claus? Like what if you found
like what if you were like hunting, right, and you killed a rabbit
and then oh my god, it's the Easter bunny. And then you had
no fucking idea, and then slowly, over the course of a year,
you just become you assume the mantle of the Easter bunny. You start transmogrifying
into this fucking creature or what other like holiday? How much of me is
left? I mean, you're you're you will end up like like you will
end up a rabbit like Kingston will disappear. Yes, you know how the
fly works? Okay, okay, okay. I would It's like kill a
leprechaun to become a leprechan and I would start saying vapid ship. I'd just
go crazy as I shrink out to bite people because I'm tinier. Now,
do you remember that Disney movie The Luck of the Irish where that you don't
remember that that is Irish? I don't think. Yeah, I only barely
remember, but I'm pretty sure that's what that movie is. I'm pretty sure
like a kid kills a and because it's embracing your culture of as an Irish
person, I wouldn't know my name is Irish, but I'm not one of
them, so I wouldn't know. Yeah, that's great. I don't know.
I love that for you. I don't really really really turned Irish face
and I was walking like, oh I we kind of recorded eleven thirty.
Eleven thirty, that's Irish? What the is that? What I Irish?
I don't pronounce the H. Man, it's I'm Tom sweety height the guys,
what's it's the turn of November. It's the turn of November. We
need to record at eleven thirty. Yeah, that's not so weird, there's
I mean, yeah, just like yeah, I know, I don't have
a lot of experience sincerely with like I don't think I've ever met anybody,
but then I met people with like americanized Irish accents, you know what I
mean, where it's like it's it's very faded. Chris O'Neil is one of
those people. Chris O'Neil had a very faded Irish accent. Uh, guy,
I know Mark has has a similarly kind of faded Irish accent where it's
like, oh man, that's like strange because it's like it's not I don't
know if I would guess that it was Irish, but I would clearly tell
it. I know it's not American. It's like very strange. Yeah,
a few. Well, I mean one of my closest friends, she's Irish
and so her mannerisms they're all in my head. But yeah, I watch
this guy, uh that chapter, he's like the only murder porn guy that
I watch, and he's the I'm sorry, I'm sorry, wait I heard
something that what he's the only murder porn guy you watch? What do you
mean? Yeah, a true crime okay, yeah, yeah, I don't
even like snuff porn or was like, but there was a whole thing about
calling it murder porn because of the people it makes. It makes perfect.
There's the two types of people. People who find it fascinating and people were
way too into it where you're kind of like looking at them side eye,
like don't you love finding how people get murdered? Like I'm the opposite.
I don't like when they describe the details of the murders and ship and like
the and like how like I like just everything that surrounds it. But then
when I got to hear about, oh dude got decapitated, and I'm like,
oh fuck, Like I don't really but then there's other pas, like
they're so fascinating. Here's always like some fucking there's always like some like Twilight
Zone, ask motherfucker announcing it with like no, something like no, like
completely detached to some cold motherfucker. He's like, this man was found,
but a perfectly shrink wrapped copy of Destroyal Humans rammed up his urethra and it
was fucking funny and it was really hard and I kept laughing. I came,
so I came. That's why I said, Uh, it would be
I think it would be better if if you did it swing I'd be laugh
I'm like, I'm like this man, wait, what you hear me?
Like in a middle a redness gript what happened this guy? Like Times top
one hundred best YouTubers, like most viewed YouTubers, If you did it?
Oh yeah yeah, because that ship is so popular. You know, it's
crazy. I was watching I was watching like some some old like montages of
like old two thousands TV shows or whatever, and it was like wife swap
and like stuff like that, And dude, the two thousands television was so
unhinged in a way that like, I honestly can't believe we didn't note it,
like it was just completely There's this there's this great episode of wife Swap
where some guys like talking about like how like I don't even know it's like
some guy it was like a whitewap episode where he's like, yeah, I'm
you know, I'm a I'm a secure man. I don't need to be
validated for it. Like I know, I'm a real man. I know
what that means. And then it immediately cuts and the announcer and and the
vo guy is like, up, next, watch a real man cry.
And it's footed it's each of him just bawling because he's clearly having a mental
breakdown. I'm like, Yo, that's nuts. Next up, watch real
man cry. No hint of a no hint of chill at all. I
think about at television like that, and I'm like, if you're doing wife
swap, right, yeah, you gotta be like, hey, can I
fuck this new wife? Is that cool? That was my immediate question,
that question, like what is that? What is that? Like it really
was a kind of it's really weird that that was basically like a cock show.
I know they didn't sleep together, but it's like the idea, you
know, what I mean, Like, it's just like because they slept in
the same beds in that show. At least at least they filmed it like
they did, so they tried to get that across. I don't know if
that, I don't know how true that is, but like they did,
they got that message across it as that's just my fucking Like, I'm like,
no deal, I'm sending her back to Sender's returning to Sender. Fuck
fu and not like like had sex with fucked like damaged. Okay, weird
to say, good show that motherfucker touched my wife. I'm killing him.
But I'm fucking it. I love it. I love it. Do you
ever watch that show The Swan? I think it was just called The Swan?
Heard that. I remember the the point of the the end game of
it, but it was no it was it was ugly motherfuckers getting plastic surgery.
That's all it was. But it was like a game show type of
thing almost the way that they had it laid out. It wasn't like,
say, oh, Reality TV or something like you would probably imagine. It's
like there's a stage they just point out all other these people are. They
give them horrible plastic surgery where they look even worse and then they they're just
like couple. It's it was probably one of the fucking craziest shows I've ever
seen, because I've never I don't even know what the if you want anything
other than you just look. You know, plastic surgery back then wasn't even
that good. So yeah, it's like it's still pretty bad. Actually I
take that back. It's okay. It's just people take it way too fucking
far. I think the technology is there to do it well, but people
don't know how to limp. It's like it you know that thing. It's
like that's saying it's like everything in moderation. I guess, right, although
this is kind of like different because you don't really it's you know, yeah,
right, you don't need any of it. But I've seen people with
plant who did plastic hurgy and it's like, oh, that looks great or
like, you know, it's like that's that's that look doesn't look weird at
all to me, and then other people who just look like like fucking beautiful
squid words and it's just like you are fucking gross. You are gross.
You're sixty five, you're sixty five year old woman. You look fucking terrible.
Why are you trying? I want to begrudge anybody for doing like basic
ship like honestly, I'll be real with you, Like if if if somebody
was like old and they had like a turkey neck and they want to get
rid of that, I support that entirely. I support that entirely because that
shit looks fucking stupid, and I'm making fun of you always if you had
that. If you have that, I make fun of you constantly. I
don't want to slap it. When I wake up, I think of you
and I laugh. So get rid of that, for sure. But everything
else to be seems totally like the whole buckle fat removal thing that's going around
where like so buckle fat, I think it's I look, I'm a guy.
I have not looked into this really deeply. I assume, based on
the cursory research that I've done, that there's like fat here, like there's
like natural fat here in like the cheeks, and they get it sucked out
to give themselves more of like a contour or like more of like a look
up. So if you want to look it up, there's obvious images of
it makes you look less feminine? Is that for women? Yes? So
like listen, so here it is. It's b U C C A L
is how you spell it, and it's buckle fat removal. You can google
images of it right now just to get get an idea of it. I
think the girl from the Boys did it, uh starlight, which sucks because
I thought she was really gorgeous actually, and I just I think, like,
it's well, I think naturally because it's kind of like, you know,
the more fat you have on you, it it uh it d mask.
You know, it's like if you're a guy, and the more fat
you have on you, the less masculine you look. And the same goes
and reverse for women. Were if they have if you see more of their
bone structure, unless you know, like it's natural. It's like if if
you're if you're like way too thin, or if you noticeably dry out fat
from a specific area, you just look fucking weird. Man. Yeah,
yeah, it's I mean I've seen it like it's it's it's another. It's
one of those things where it's like it's very clearly like something. I have
friends who've done it who look perfectly fine because it's like very little. They
didn't get rid of all of it, They just got rid of some of
it to kind of like if their face is a little bit more of the
way they want, Like I don't mind that at all, but like there
are people who are getting it completely fucking removed, completely fucking completely, and
it's and it just you look like a fucking alien. I'm sorry, Like
it just doesn't. It just doesn't look natural or correct at all. If
you get rid of all your buckle fat you need that to look like a
person, you scream like like, oh my god, what's that? What
you see him? Next time? Keep face, guys, I feel like
only like a ah, it's the fourth kind and like and just cry.
But I know, I don't know looks like Triple h you know, because
of her nose. Holy shit, Like like I feel like there's there are
times where, yeah, if she got her nose done, I'd be like,
yeah, of course, Like it's not because it's not even symmetrical,
Like Triple does not have a symmetrical nose to with the rest of his the
rest of his fucking his face. It's just out there and it looks very
obvious and so in real in things like that, if there's something I feel
like that is, I would say traditionally abnormal, I see no problem.
Well there's obviously no problem either way. But I'm saying I would totally understand
if people wanted to get some work done. But when you see things that
are traditionally normal and people want to get rid of it, I'm always opposed
to it. It's like, uh, unless, like I saw a girl
she got a breast reduction or tits were masked to very small frame, and
then she got her tits and all the guys in the comment sections are like
freaking out, and I'm like, I don't know, man, I think
better because your back were like fucking picos and ship Like. There's also just
like a genuinely crazy those are just a genuinely good medical reason to do that,
you know, right, So it's like, okay, that is natural.
But at the same times, on the skinny girl is not good for
them, Like I've seen it more than once, and it's like it's not
not great for them, like it hurts them, like it's like one of
the It's like it's like when a dog you've had for a long time dies,
you know what I mean? Where it's like, man, this is
I feel I feel bad that this is going away, but it's inhumane to
keep it going, you know, like it's like I understand, so I'll
mourn it. Make no mistake if I'm dating somebody with just h h you
know H size, and I'm just like a man, this is great.
Yeah, exactly. You know, I'm knocking those things around like like hell
for at least at least one at least one last time. Funeral, you
know, Viking Funeral will send them off on a boat. I'll shoot an
narrow, light it on fire. For me, I personally get plastic surgery
only to change my nose. I don't think you've got a bad nose.
Change your nose. I'd make it as broad as it like this broad.
You'd make it like Shannon Sharp's nose. Yeah, like that, like it's
like a true blue. You would look at I find I find disdain for
your nose weird. M hm, yeah, I said, I find your
disdain for your nose very. I think it does entirely. I don't know
what it is. And I think you would look baffling weird, Like even
if you had my nose, you look weird. I wish you had standard.
I wouldn't be friends with you straight. I just had a standard negroid
nose, a big white, super wide nostrils, small, no bridge,
just a big old you just want like a triangle audience. It is a
big old fucking Savannah African nose and a little bit of water. It's not
for you, man. A serious question, though, serious question, like
if you had to do pass, but what would you do? Like actually
if you had if you had one, you actually actually okay, I just
don't. I mean, if there's anything like it could be nothing, well
like literally nothing other than uh if if somebody just gave me money, I'd
be like, I'm not opposed to hard work and losing weight, but it
go ahead and suck something that goddamn fat off me whatever you know, like
you don't even suck is zapp it off? Dude? Is that so whatever?
Either interested into my body? So you just zap it off. I
would deal with the pain this, give me no, give me no painkillers.
I'm like, that's I would. I would try to take myself really
tall, but only in my shins. Oh, no long shins. I
have really long shins. In that it I would have six foot shins,
and then the rest of me would be normal. You know what I would
do? You know what I would do. I would get out. I
would try to have somebody to put us the devas stand in my back and
then die like that's not real. Yeah, that's not real. You would
immediately die like you were going to shot. So quick cut my back open
and put its fucking turbine in me and they're like, yo, I pay,
just pay some just pay some Korean guy. Just play some Korean guy
with like with like a fucking Deli next to Denny's and be like, hey,
can you put this fucking PlayStation five in my back? And they're like
yeah, sure, and then they just and then just come into I'm yea,
No, honestly, I don't live. I don't know, but I
got a metal skeleton and every time I go through, every time I go
through, it's the winter. I'm paralyzed three months and a year because of
the cold. I can't move. No, you're just dead. You're just
dead. You're you're really overestimating your ability to die minutes into the operation.
You should get strong moments. You should get implants in your biceps. Only
Chris, have you seen cynthol. Have you seen what those guys BELLI ship
And they're just like, there's this Russian guy who I started following. I
saw him a long time ago and I finally found him and he's just he's
done slap fighting, the power slap thing he has these he just had.
It's just his arms, just his biceps, and it looks so fucking disgusting,
like he's probably gonna die from some poisoning pretty soon. But you should.
Yeah, I don't know, man, the whole, the whole.
The only thing that I could think. I don't know if I don't know
if hair stuff is plastic surgery necessarily, but if I lost any more,
if I lost like more hair and my hairline like went like crazy, i'd
probably like get more, get like a hairline thing. Yeah, I don't.
Yeah, I think so, just because I like having hair honestly,
Like I don't really care about like how I look more so, I just
like I like having hairsh fuck around with. It's funny, like I don't
feel the opposite, but I almost feel like just because I haven't completely lost
my hair, like my hairline's gone back just a little bit, but I
almost feel like it feels disrespectful to my head because I kind of want to
just shave my I just want to shave it off. Really, I've thought
about that too, like I've definitely just like shaving. Shaving. That's what
you used to do when I was young. It's just it's and then I
do myself right now, I have my wife she cuts my hair because first
and before, I just hate spending money on the hair. I just feel
like it's it just it just pisses me off to give these fuckers money.
And I'm to give you a tip too, doing your fucking job at your
job. You didn't do anything else for me? Did you? Did you
take my balls? And I gotta give you. I still give him a
tip anyway, but still they don't your balls. I mean, I'm going
to the wrong box, all right. You gotta come to my guy grabbing
their head to bring your head to your cock, and they're like, what
are you doing coming to your job? Suck me up. I'll go to
your guy because you go to a black barber. They're all beating the ship
out of you. If you even suggest that ship, just start stopping you.
The fuck is wrong with you. And then they'll continue to get in
some head. God, they'll talk for seventy hours and just do one little
slight. I'm a little black barbershops. It's so fun. I have ship
to do. I I that's a that's a day. That's a day.
Though you like, take you take it. I wish I had a day,
if I if I had time off. Dude, I'm always doing it
unfortunately, so it's now it's just I'm just haveing my wife do it because
I gets fair. You'd have the fun a borrower for like an hour and
a half for me, or I'm like, just shave the sides off you
piece of ship. This will literally take ten minutes or less. Turn the
fucking things off for a second, and then talk to fucking his nigga behind
him and turn it back on and go. And I'm like, are you
I'm going to kill you. I love that love. I get it.
It's I get the vibe. I get it. It's just I just don't
have time for It's just like I said, I don't read books because like,
I don't have time to just do one thing. I'm trying to do
fucking pussy. I don't expect them. I'm not a fucking pussy, fucking
pussy, I don't do isn't somebody here? Go ahead? It's weird,
is it isn't I heard a voice screaming, explosion. The room goes white,
and it's like, what, dude, what if he gets gets like
he's getting assaulted behind us, like he's getting he's punched, and the dude
slides his fucking pants off. It's just like rubbing his butchies. I would
just I would just simply exit. I wouldn't even. I wouldn't even.
I always be like, oh ship, just looking at the camera, just
rubbing, like Derek. So what uh? The dark the dark tank?
Everybody? Yeah you died? Yeah, I mean yeah, well these things
happen. Did you have a butler or made answer? Your ship? Heard
a voice? Do I have a man? You have like a helper or
something? I've heard a voice? Yeah, Like I'm like, I'm ex
QC helper, ex QC Holy ship, Holy ship. I forgot about this,
my god. So everybody, everyone that I saw in my timeline,
we all thought in unison that oh this is just an ex QC, like
people have been editing all the time, him reacting to fucked up ship.
This one was real. He was watching just fucking Gossin's Palestine is getting fucking
bombed a hell and he was making face. Yeah, it's crazy. He
was like, oh my god, he's like I was like, I couldn't
believe it when I saw and then Noodle and then Noodle friend of the show,
or it is so funny Noodle because like I so Noodle is a YouTuber.
He said he does great videos on like games and stuff, but like
I met him accidentally when he was when he had no subscribers because I bullied
him in a in a Halo game for years ago. Yeah, years ago,
that guy Noodle in my Halo video where I made fun of him.
It was my it was my bully Hunter's video or like at the end,
I had like a master class where I was like I dont even teach you
how to bully, and like he was one of the people in the games
that I was like shitting on mic He was like, oh, couch,
I mean he's he's he's cool, but like he made fun of x U.
See he's blown up since then, but like he was like this scum
fuck and the XUC responded like basically with a picture of him like with a
bunch of money, and he was just like on the ground, like,
oh, look at how much money I have? Like, wow, this
guy, uh somebody he's in Montreal, right, isn't he one of those
people Canadian pad? The thing that sucks about it too, is that,
like I X, you see is clearly like miserable. Like he's clearly like
a miserable person. But I actually think he's too stupid to even understand that.
So he's like so he's like. The sad thing about it is that
he's like he's like inoculated to the reality of how sad his existence is.
Like he has all this money, nobody likes him, He's completely unlikable.
He's got no personality. He's got I've seen more personality in a microwave sock.
But he has so many he has so many followers it blows my mind.
I following, I was like, how like not even I'm not even
like I tried so hard. I tried, so's he's not for anybody.
I have no problem. I have no problem saying I have no problem saying
this. There's actual See donates no value to humanity at all. His existence
is like a deficit on the on the human human sucks. Look now,
it's just like completely worth. Gen Z is a little weird brother like they're
they're they're the stuff that they're into. The I show speed uh EXQC.
Even when I go go to the gym. I've been going to the gym
since I was like seventeen eighteen, and the very different. You don't like
seeing how young people behave now do every time I go to the fucking gym
and go to the sauna and there are people who have no muscles on them
taking videos of themselves posing. I've never seen that. It is a it's
it's a thing. It's just different. I don't understand it. Why the
fuck would you humiliate yourself like that? But it's for them, they're not
It's like they're being fucking weird transmission there. No, it's no transformation.
You don't fucking flex in the mirror. You stand normal and this is my
old And then when you're actually transformed, when you start flexing. These people
are fucking flexing like as if they're jacked and shit. And I was like,
I will beat the living piss out of all of you, all of
you combined, and and and they're just like, but they're so like gaudy,
and I'm like, anyway, I just feel like there's like, maybe
it's confidence though I like fair play. I guess right, maybe it's a
confidence thing because I'm like, I just never seen it before and these are
the same people probably watching x Q while they're flexing. Maybe maybe I don't
know. I can't. I I tried to find like the I tried to
find my way around because I wanted to tell him to kill himself. I
saw that, so I tried. I tried to find some some way around
it. And I think it's still up. I don't think, because I
don't think it's too roundabout for it to qualify as like a as like a
as like a proper that was to length? What did you say? I
can't. I mean, that's the only thing I think. I said,
Uh, it is my personal belief that you should bathe more regularly, wash
your toaster, and practice multitasking. Yeah, yeah, is what I said.
Because I knew it was lengthy enough to not it would be it would
be like if it got reported, I would be like, why, what
is what is the problem with this? Right? I think they wouldn't they
wouldn't even if it got reported, they wouldn't. Uh. Even if you
could appeal it, it would be too Uh. I's awso people. I
was shocked to see certain people like publicly liking and I was like, that's
fine, that's interesting because no one likes him. No one likes him though,
like no like and no one has any respect for him. It's funny
because I was I was at a party uh recently where I like, it's
so weird. I was like in a party and like Hassan was there,
and I'm like, this is fucking weird. But but like, uh,
and I remember thinking like, oh man, I've I've made fun of a
couple of people in this room. And it's so funny. It's so funny
to be in that environment because I feel like a spy almost. Yeah,
I liked even though I liked most of the people there, Like it's like
you know, Eddie Burback and all these people, and I'm like, oh,
I like these guys. But then like, oh, I know you
have a thought. I know you have a thought about maybe it's weird.
I'm very bad, Like I don't know. I can't if I don't like
somebody, I can't mess with them very well. Oh no, I didn't
go up in to Hassan and be like, oh hey, manly bro,
you take that back like a bitch, bro. I don't know. Actually
I actually more respect for Hassan because of his interview with what do you call
it? That that's Chris Morgan, Pierce Morgan, lamey British cunt everybody.
You know what I'll say about Piers Morgan, even though he is like slimy
as ship, He's let on a lot of like people who normally any other
mainstream media outlet would not let on, which I will say is kind of
insane. He had even hard paint. I don't like Jank at all.
His his his uncle iss yeah really he does. Yeah, opposite of an
casparian who added experience another person who she has she has good takes sometimes,
but just so, why did it to be so unlikable? Like it's like
but that you could you could really extend that argument to all of us,
you know what I mean, Like because if you see because I'm sure we
each have good takes and bad takes or whatever, but like people like people
might see it in like a very specific context where it's like wow, this
guy's a fucking asshole or whatever, and like, you know, I don't
know. I agree. The longer, the longer, yeah, the longer
I've lived on the end of the more, I'm like, I've seen videos
of people where they say shit that's like really fucking ridiculous and just out of
pocket and just like, wow, that's a really dumb thing to say.
But I don't even think, Like I that used to be enough for me
to be like, oh, well, fuck that guy, but now it's
like, I don't know if I really give a ship. I agree content
people make now. Bro, if you don't know these, you know,
you don't know something stupid. Eventually, if you're if you're fucking doing this,
you will. And there's also the idea of like just when like we
would meet fans or whatever. Like I remember meeting fans and sometimes it never
got as crazy as like sneak oh you know what I mean, where people
were like yeah, fuck women, but like, but I did. I
remember meeting some fans who were like, uh, yeah, man I I
I don't know, I man, I fucking hate Anita Sarkisian or whatever,
And I'm like, I mean, okay, but uh, I mean do
you hate this person really? Like I remember thinking, like like hate,
I really feel like I think she's don't get me wrong, I think I
don't think she's very intelligent. I think her content's not very good, and
I'll make fun of it. But like hate, is you hate this person?
That's a bit that's a bit strong, because I don't feel that for
really anybody that I don't I haven't met personally, you know what I mean?
I know, like the only person that is even close to or I
would attack them, you know. Like I'm talking about hate is like there's
something about and I might have mentioned this before, but I have like almost
a Pavlovian response to Matt Walsh, Like if I saw him, I would
probably pounce on him just because just knowing how many people he's caused harm,
and there's it extends to a lot of people, have right whatever something about
specifically just knowing that Like when if you see old ass pictures of this dude,
he was basically he looked like the drummer of h I make fun of
this guy every once while the drummer of the Black Keys. That guy looks
like such an ugly fucking nerd is not the guy who fumbles Michelle, Yes,
that guy, same guy, And basically that's what Matt watsh looked like.
Back then, he was like one of the most pathetic soy feel and
now he just does this playing fucking like oh he has he he has the
brillo pad beard to cover up his weak ass chins. It's look, first
of all, on this podcast, we don't care about body shaming at all.
We will body shame. I hate this lin. I hate this line
that people have where it's like, well, we don't buy it, like
because the people like, let make no fucking mistake, there are people out
there who are like, we can't, we can't body shame people. But
as soon as Ben Shapiro says something, it's like, well look at the
short fucking It's like, come on you you like to body shame, great,
just be honest about it. That's fine, But like, and so
I will body shane man like Matt Walls looks like a fucking looks like a
I don't even know what it looks like, fingers like, I don't know.
It just looks so strange. Like without his beard, he just looks
so funny. He looks like a willy Willie with his beard first off,
and then like without it, he just he just looks like a fucking I
don't even know, like a disabled seal. That's like a very confusing looking
person and like and it just it sets my alarms off. Man, It
just like it's jarring. His beard doesn't look natural either. I feel like
I feel like it doesn't look real. And so to me, I'm just
like, I look at this guy. He changed my perception on beards entirely,
like because now, like I'm not even joking because when I see somebody
with a beard, now, my immediate assumption is you do not have a
change. Oh cry, that's so fun. Holy, that's exhausting me.
Oh my god. Amen, that's that's exactly like that's the only guy.
There's plenty of monsters out there, of course, but I don't have this
this visceral response where I'm like, I need to do something when I when
I just when I see him on my screen, if he ever comes up,
I'm just like, oh, and so I would. I would.
Unfortunately, I'm hoping the cops would be like not take me to jail and
be like I get it. You know, if if I if I if
I if I ever pounce on them. That's kind of like what happened to
me that happened to me at school, Like when like in the last like
week of like seventh or eighth grade, I can't remember which. I think
it was eighth grade, yeah or no, no, I think it was
like the last week of It was the last week of seventh grade or something.
And I remember this kid on the bus was like he wasn't bullying.
I wouldn't call it bullying because it wasn't like he wouldn't follow me around or
like beat me up or anything or like make he would just fuck with me
constantly to the point where I'm like, bro, stop he would like he
would like, I don't know, like again, it's not beating up,
but it's like physically a cost thing, you know what I mean, it's
like pushing you around or whatever. Like he would like he would like he
would like sit behind me and like like push my head into the into the
fucking uh what is it the U the seat behind me, but like not
hard, just enough to bother me. Yeah, just like stop And like
the whole fucking year, I was like stop it, stop it, leave
me the fuck alone, and then the last week, I was just like
I'm hitting this person. It's over. Like I'm just like, I have
one week left to school. What I took all my finals? What are
they gonna do? Expelled me, like it's over whatever, I don't care,
And I turned around. I waited for it. We got the bus
pulled in to the school. I turned around, I punched his face into
the window as hard as I could, and I just walked off the bus.
And then I got called into the principal's office and they were like,
hey, listen, we get it. Don't do that again. I was
like, oh, well, because like I had waited so long, and
there were so many witnesses. Even the bus driver was like yeah, I
mean I firmly believe, like knowing that, like I'm probably as old now
as that bus driver was, probably or like at least close to you know
that, Like I bet he was like, look, man, the kid
dashs for it. Basically like, clearly he's hit all these Look man,
that is like all the the Matt Walsh's or the bench Appiers, whoever you
want to say, these are all people who clearly have not gotten their asses
handed to them. Oh, clearly you can tell you can. That's that's
all about how someone talks. If they've been beat up before, you can
hear in someone's voice they gotten asked before, like there's something about like somebody
like that acts like that, it behaves like that, getting humbled. It
is such a necessity. It needs to happen. And a lot of people
go, we're so sill on average, we're so fucking civil. People like
to pretend like we're not. But you have people like this walking around and
they're not getting their heads bashed in constantly. It is, it is,
it is, it is. It is. I think a testament actually how
it is that some people just need to People need to have moments where they
get checked. You know there. It doesn't have to get extremely fine,
but you have to get checked. Who have to understand how they speak to
people. Imagine how different our government would be if these motherfuckers got checked.
I mean, just like, let's just be real about it for a second.
Oh my god. If Mitch McConnell got ruffed up in a Denny's parking
lot by the lower, by the by the lower five percent up by the
staff, that's Mitch. That's the soup. Fuck. Okay, here's here's
your soup. Mitch just splashing his face. Put a grand stand down his
pants. He probably wouldn't even fucking notice. You probably would't even notice that
he's getting be out. He standing there. You throw him, and he's
just standing the scalding. His skin is bubbling like a pizza in a fucking
toaster of it, and he's just like anyway, we should probably get some
more questions. Oh yeah, there's only been one question in an hour.
Yeah, Genghis condoms conro Go Genghist condom road and he says, hello,
the three spooges. Do you have any food hot takes? And do you
ever use them to your advantage? For example, I once put pineapple and
anchovies on the same pizza because I knew no one else would want to slice,
but I would still enjoy it. That's a baller move, man.
I get that, but I still do I get don't respect. I respect
the greed, do not. I can't respect pineapple and anchovies. That is
that's that's out of pocket. Yeah, I got Polynesian by any chance,
because I can forgive that. If you are Polynesian, I can forgive that
choice because you've grown up with those delicacy you don't know any better, Yeah
right, I don't know. I don't know if I I've ever used it
to my I don't know if I have like a hot take, but I
do have like a pet peeve that really bothers me. And it's when people
order something for the table and it comes with sauces, and then they just
kind of presume they just kind of like, all right, well, the
sauce is going all over it, you know what I mean, Like it's
just like, here's all the sauce. I'm just like, dude, there's
sauce cups for a reason. It's just because so everybody can pick and choose
what they want. Don't fucking lather all of these fries in the sauce that
you like just because you like it. That's kind of fucked up. I've
had like that really bothers me. It's not a hot take. I feel
like most people would agree with that, and that happens to me more times
than not because I eat like a child. And so what it means is
like, I'm not the guy that has just the abundance of business. I'm
having a normal conversation and the food shows up. You know honestly, how
how fucking crazy would it be if this is the only Let's say we met
exclusively online, right, we never ate together. We did this show for
three years, and then we met up in person at like one of these
live shows or whatever, and then we went out to get like dinner before
Hannry. We're like, all right, guys, let's get some dinner.
And then one of us, let's say me like like, oh yeah,
the food's here. And then I just like lean back in my chair and
I go and I just like spin up all over myself. I'm like,
I'm so nasty, Like I'm wiping my fucking I get into your hand and
wiping all over yourself all over my show. Yeah, I get hot wings
with the sauce and I use my shirt to clean it out. I cry
a little bit. I'm loud, no joke. You know what happens.
You know, you know what. There's only there's only two things I can
think of the either the show ends or we we have we make an agreement
that we are never eating together again. That is never excuse me so much
as I've known Chris for like eleven years, so if I've just never seen
him do that, like all of a sudden, he just does that,
And I'm like, why if you do that? I would I don't know
how it's that is, so that is so gross that man, I don't
even know. Imagine your your your significant other doing that too, like you've
just been with them for a long time, Like fucking my wife old marriage
starts doing that. Ship, I'd be like fireful that the idea of him
being like cut just like gave you a nice itching between your balls and your
leg, but the sweat is put. Yeah, that that rules. But
it's all over the table and ship and like like like you're like swimming or
something and just just being a fucking fucking hate kids man grabbing grabbing your order
chocolate milk and drinking it with both hands. So disgusting. But food advantages.
You know, I'm usually the odd man out because of the the lack
of options. I said, I'm not a cilantro guy. There's a lot
of stuff that I just don't like to put. I'm a bare bones eater
and most thangs don't come that way. And so when people order stuff by
default that's supposed to be shared, it'll be like say, say, for
example, to me. A chicken caesadia is chicken and cheese and tortilla you
get from a lot of restaurants. For a lot of them, they put
the works in it. They put the works in it, and I'm like,
that's not how I eat that. I don't want that, and so
it's not and it's not anybody else's fault. So I'm usually just like a
man, I'm just gonna have to stare at that ship. Hey, you
gonna eat that ship? That's crazy. I recently had so recently I'm I'm
officially I'm the Mangos. Mangoes. I would have died by now, right.
So what happened is that recently we went to our friend's house for the
weekend and I had alvocado. I had a little bit of avocado in one
of my breacritos, and I could taste it instantly, and I was having
my panc like my throat was closing, and I realized that, like,
imagine being a a I don't like avocado, and I've never really eating often,
But imagine being lifted like something you love, like imagine chicken, chicken,
You fucking breakout. If I was allergic to to like iced tea.
I think I would probably kill myself. I would like ruin me because it's
like the one drink that gives me solace. I feel you, But so
wait, you were so your throat closed up actually closing. Yeah, so
you almost die. It's like a real allergy, Like you need a fucking
EPI pine. Luckily it took a benadro It instantly knocked out because I was
like, I was sort of feeling funny and I was like, gods,
damn, what's in this? So what you're saying is like you survived me
and Derek probably could have been if you died, we would we would get
a bigger cut of the show. Yeah, though you kind of you kind
of screw us over there. Yeah you don't try to move back to cal
you know, I need that ship. I don't. I don't want you
to die necessarily, but you know what I mean, you're pretty cool.
If I mean it's fair, that would be a pretty good silver lining to
any of us dying. Like there's the one benefit a larger chicks. They
they stay helped, they help you, you know, like you're just you're
completely fine. You get a larger check, you get more money, you
get like everything goes well for you. Crazy. I'm just like, that's
that's horrible and I'm dead. Hey man, what am I gonna do about
it? You know, life goes on mourn. I mean I can,
I can mourn on my free time more and I'll take I'll happily take the
money. And I'm like, dang, that sucks, man. Look well,
mourn you by making a uh Tom Sweeney sound bowl word and you start
selling a bunch of swing merch dead swen merch you guys, just don't you
guys crazy rip swing merchandise. I'm gonna do I'm gonnammission somebody like you're you're
on the floor and your your ear, your your head is just inflated from
from the from the from the allergy. But green to let people know that
you died from an avocado allergy. So you're gonna be you just like like
a balloon and then you're fat. You don't have to be that rude dead
swing h yeah kingson the king Yeah yeah, yeah, Kingston saying it's disrespectful
to make fun of the dead that way. Is that you guys are my
friends. You guys are my close friends. Matthew Perry was everybody's friend,
and Perry didn't didn't stand up, so shut up? All right? Oh
you have to you have to sit up in the situation he was in.
First of all, I'm pretty sure cardiacgressed a heart attack. Oh no,
look fall off the tub? How about that? Look? I don't I
don't say anything. I feel like it's gonna age poorly. Uh when I
also die in a tub. Yeah, So it's true that that that song,
the French song, was specifically made for that show, right, So
is that right? I feel like that's correct. And I thought I was
hoping you guys knew so no one told you life was gonna be this.
Let me slob glo, friends, I'm out here throwing. I'm out here
Boston rope for a showerance. It's like you're always fucking three for que years.
What happened yesterday? I'll be in your reader because I am fucking dudes,
because yeah, once more, you're almost let me into the bottom of
this. Yeah, this little uh so. The US rock duo the rem
Brands, who were building popularity in the alternative space, reluctantly agreed to record
I'll be There for You, uh for the sitcom's theme when A debuted in
nineteen eety four, which is just co written by the show's executive producers.
And there's an article here that says the rem Brands reveal Friends theme song ruined
their career reluctantly. Yeah what does that mean? But I mean, you
know what it means. It's probably it's like, here's a band who doesn't
want to do fucking corporate shit. They just want to play music, and
they're like, oh, well, you know, we got this, we
got this gig for the show. Who the fuck knows. They're probably assuming
that, like, oh, here's a sitcom. What the fuck are the
what are the odds that it's gonna it's gonna you know, as it did,
Yeah, because like most TV shows don't get picked up, so you'd
be like, oh, you know, it's a good check from like a
big network. Will probably live for like maybe like barely a season or might
not even air, who the fuck knows, and then we'll we'll get a
nice bag and then we can go build our career. And instead they happen
to make the theme song for like the most popular sitcom, probably like one
of the most popular sitcoms ever and now it's the only song that a lot
of people know by them, So then people go to their shows, they're
like play friends. Yeah, I can imagine that horrible. Like that kind
of annoyed me to a certain extent where I know what you mean, because
you should be grateful that like that many people give a shit at all.
You don't have You don't have to. You don't owe your fans anything.
Exact, you really don't. You don't. You don't though, like I'm
being I'm being fucked up, but truthful, you don't. Actually don't,
wildly Drew, you do. You appreciate them, but you don't owe them
anything. But you do because you appreciate them, like thank you guys.
It's so wild. It's like when they when it's like when the bands refuse
to play hits and I'm like, get the that's what got you to the
ball, bitch. Yeah, And I don't want to do it no more.
You can't make me do it no more. Sit down, like so
then you can't be mad at them when they don't show up at your fucking
shows any more. Down at my fucking concert, that is true, your
fucking mouth and wat you play my indie song? I wrote at sixteen,
I just want to hear it. Artists say that something fuck up is sit
down man. Yeah. Like it'd be like if I went to a look
Hard that I would work for them. They'd be like, yeah, yeah,
tell me sit down one more time, bitch. Yeah. Savior is
not my favorite rise Against song or anything, right, but like if I
go to see if I go to see rise Against, I want to hear
Savior. I want to hear yeah, because they do a fucking awesome rendition
of it. There's like a fucking four minute solo in it. It's sick,
people's talking, a guy pulling guitars, fantastic. It's a good it's
good instrumentation. To me, I'm just like, so that's the way around
it, right. It's like, Okay, so you have your hit that
you're probably sick of playing, fuck with it, man, make it.
Make a crazy version of it, you know what I mean, Make the
make one that it's still the song, but you've got like some new ship
in it, or like something that's like heavier in the middle of it to
kind of like or whatever. You what. Someone, That's a great way
to do it because when I do when I first went to that Rise Again
show and they did Savior. I was like, oh, sick, cool,
nice, it's a good thing to end. And then like it got
to a certain point, it just changed entirely. I was like, this
is fucking awesome. This makes it totally worth it to hear. What every
group should do. They should bring out rage against the machine. Halfway through
single, every brings out rage with the fastest jet like like you're like like,
like, what's a group? What's a group that makes no sense?
Like Joji's singing right, and all of a sudden, it's some of those
that are forces in the middle of Jod's song, and it's like the Wiggles
sings the Wiggles, These little kids about to get radicalized as fuck, are
the same that burn crosses losses Wiggles song. What's the what's that popular Wiggle
song? It's like salad, yummy, yummy, Sally, I don't I
don't know. You're way too old. Yeah that makes sense. You're way
too old, and and you have no nieces or nephews. That is true.
So that's why there's no way. Derek, the kid that I know,
is like or right child, no child, no child who survived an
encounter with me. I'll tell you that much. Goddamn is that? What
is it? What are we doing? It's just the Wiggles. It's called
the Wiggles Salad. Yeah, the band is called the Wiggles. Yeah.
It's just these four like kids show guys who are just in solid colored shirts
and they would just make kids songs. Fruit a song that was like fruit
salad, yummy, yumy, and then like all right, thank you,
we've been the Wiggles, and then fucking raging Machine comes out. Hear it
because about a third of the video has been viewed, So let me tell
you this. You've absolutely because they had they had this weird like meme moment.
I don't remember exactly when. It might have been like twenty ten or
fucking only fifteen. He could, I don't know, but like there was
a period of time where the Wiggles means were kind of popping. Okay,
yeah, I'm gonna hear this cause I don't remember that. It sucks.
You're never gonna listen. It doesn't wigs on the It's a kid's song.
It's a bad kids song. It's a bad bad It was always like kings,
It's a it's not a Okay, so it's not a kids song because
kids songs are like April Levine's complicated, you know what I mean, that's
I don't know that's a kid. Yeah, this is a baby song.
This is a baby like fucking I put my diaper on backwards, shipped up
my belly instead, like there's I don't understand the whatever it falls in front
of it. I love it. I love it. It's like my belly.
Yeah, this is bad, this is really bad. I'm slide.
It's a special treat. Stark Tank kids songs, we'd probably be billionaires,
man, because that ship. I hear so many kids songs are so fucking
awful, And honestly, I'm not even kidding. If you want to you
started, if you started to completely, if you started a completely separate channel,
just like just a separately monitored just so it's not demonetizationly because kids,
the star Tank is fucked Start Tank is ruined by that channel is fucking everything.
If I could upload a video of me thanking my parents just for existing
and being great, and it'd be like they would assume, they would just
assume it's like, what kind of what awful ship? Is in this.
So if we started a new channel where we just did stupid fucking kids songs
and we made it as fucking as rudimentary as possible, that ship's getting That
ship is getting millions of views. So simple the difficult to make. We
should. We should? And ironically I'm not even kidding, No I would.
I'm so fun. You want to try? Want you want to try?
Actually wanted to want to do a double featurection, ammo, next time
we do one where we do the first one we're gonna do and then we
make a kids song. Have you seen that? That one where it's like,
uh, that one where it's like, but we have to make a
good kid song and it's not vulgar, like nothing like real kids song,
real kid song, real kids song. I just think, what were you
just say? Christ, Because there's one that I've been saying on Tiktoko a
while where it's like Mickey on the Mickey on the railroad picking up stones,
and it's like and like there came a train and broke Mickey's bones and it's
real. It's like it's on like YouTube, kids and ship and it's and
there's this and there's this fucking screen this blood curdling scream in the middle of
it where it's like what the fuck, But it's and it's not monetize that
is fucking wow. I'm sure if you look it up you'll find it.
But like, yeah, it's it's fun. The only thing I don't like
about the if you if you, if you make it for kids, then
nobody can comment because I would be I want to read the comments. I
would like to read the comments. But yeah, if you do for kids,
it was because of all those perverts. You remember, do you remember
when that happened. There was a lot of uh there was like these kids
content and there would be perverts commenting weird things where it'd be like time stamps
and ship Oh yeah, was like so they just like if it's a kid's
version of anything, that smart smart, it's smart. Kids content doesn't need
comments. Like you're watching you're watching an episode of fucking Mickey Master's Club Ass
and you go down and it's like hot pink sluts in your area and it's
like, what the fuck? What is going on? That is? Yeah,
I understand totally blowing out pussy whorees in Tacoma, Washington need your sex.
It's like your sex. I love that. That's a great it's a
great line with there. Uh did you Okay? So snark Tank kids?
What s t K? That would that be our yeah, snark tank kids.
See, I think look, there could be some good song. What
is it? Blues clues had some some some bops. Yeah, We'll just
find some bullshit fucking fire that that that theme song, like I feel like
we could make because I'm like the kids, is there better than that wiggleship?
What the fun is that? Dude? We can do it. We
can do it. Do it, man, we can do it, and
then hopefully the parents never find out on this podcast will be the exactly exactly
what I was thinking. That's crazy. Oh my god, I hate that.
I hate the same. Chris is the face of that though, like
there is in the background where the background the background niggles. It's like that
I want you, I want you to photoshop my teeth to be mega yellow,
like like like distressingly yellow. And then you guys are in the back
like kind of like looking at in both directions, you know what I mean,
like to the left and right, and that'll be that'll be the that
would be That's a fun project. There's no way that would We're not calling
it, but I don't know. I'm dead serious the idea of having a
podcast like this and then also having a side thing we do, which is
just making music that's and we're making the older the older I get the more
I realized that, Like, I mean, I've noticed, I've known this
truly for a while, but like, meritography isn't real, you know.
It's why it's why x q C has as much money as he has,
and it's like, well fuck it, like and people be like, well,
why are you making kids music and you don't care abou kids music?
Yeah, you're right, I want to I want a bag. Yeah,
man, I want to I want to eat. I'm not gonna like pretend
to believe ship that I don't believe or anything, but like, like,
what what is working if not doing ship that you don't want to do?
Like you're gonna really chastise me, like for like making kids music and making
millions while you're fucking at best Buy, a place that you clearly don't want
to be at, Like what the fuck? Come on, No, we
wants to be a best then we wants to be a best Buy fucking geek
squad coming in and dragging everybody in the backroom, molesting them, been setting
them free, like get out ruin my first PC. Fuck geek squad,
dude. Fuck geek squad, dude. Geek squad reformatted my fucking hard drive
when I'm like, oh, I'm having some issues and they just wipe everything.
And I had like four thousand pictures all from my high school and all
this ship, and I'm like, oh my, why would you have four
thousand thirty plus minute videos pornogin free on that fucking hard drive? The two
thousand shape, I can't that is a lot. I had a lot.
This was in two thousand and four, when things weren't like plentiful, Like
I bought a forty gig hard drive after that for like one hundred dollars or
something because they had that forty gigs and the idea of someone deleted. Okay,
as at your most honey teenage self. Imagine you come home right your
mom is just like, honey, I pressed on binary your computer and it
said reformat delete all of something. I don't know what it is. You
check your folders, You go to your porn folder completely barren, how you
react extreme disappointment as a team in that year. Yeah, you had to
work hard to get that ship. I'd be extremely not when we were.
When we were, I didn't save any of it. I had bookmarks.
Yeah, way, that Internet was just just not enough. It was almost
there in two thousand and four, but not, which was insane too.
It's insane too because like I've had my account for so long that like all
those bookmarks are still there, like all those videos are like deleted or whatever
it was, like this has been removed or whatever, they're still there.
To get rid of them a couple before the purge, Yeah, they're all
done. You can see. You can see, like if you wanted,
you could go out of my computer and just see like what my taste was
in like twenty ten or whatever. And it's all fucking whatever ship. It's
squirting milk everywhere, big old juicy, fucking pussies, leaking juice and liquid
with some big old goasy, big fat booies, fat booties and milk,
milk dripping fucking a witching pities with some fucking type it into the search engines,
typing and they're just like, we got nothing. It's literally the talking
about police called dude police no data event. All right, let's move on.
Uh Felonious Punk, the crime man with the crime plan wrote and he
says, hello, snark boys. I created a Patren account, specifically the
torment you at a low low cost of five dollars a month. Welcome boy.
Uh. My question is simple, who would you cast in a live
action Gears of War movie? I need at minimum your picks from Marcus dom
and Carmine. Thank you for all the content. Remember if she won't suck
it from the back, she's not the one that's crazy. But thank you,
thank you for coming. Uh. By the way, yeah that's crazy.
But I do want to mention that we are going to be doing in
the coming weeks a extra am O episode where we we uh right, We
did some episodes where we wrote what was what was the one that we wrote?
We wrote like a sequel to the Independence Day that I thought, and
then the Mask the Mask too. We're going to be so we did two
movies. We're going to we're going to do a little pitch meeting and rewrite.
I don't know if we're gonna do Gears of War four, rewrite Gears
of War three. We're gonna decide on the day. I think we're gonna
rewrite the end of three. Yeah, yeah, we should rewrite three.
It should be okay. Well, yeah, well we'll rewrite Gears three.
I don't really remember Gears of War four, to be honest, So like
Gears three would be fine. Well, but that's gonna be an extra m
so if you want to jump into that, there's some extra content around the
Patreon and and the coming weeks for that. But uh, who would you
cast? So I would immediately Marcus Bookie to nine and eight. Oh,
okay, easily. He needs a bag. I think he needs he needs
a way out of his horrible situation. Character that's insane. I would turn
that game off so fast. Oh wait's a movie, right, and we're
doing live action movies as Wayne Johnson. Uh things that. Yeah, no,
it's too generic. We gotta get we gotta get somebody. Carmine,
so he's the guy who dies Kevin. He's gonna looks so small and that
they're gonna have they have They're like they're gonna have to like shoot him in
force perspective looking correct. Kevin Hard as Karma would be funny. What about
just purely on the side as as Marcus Phoenix, you as the Locust Queen.
It's emergency looks had overtake you. We're going to sink into chet.
We're going through just in the with the warm chet. Yeah, Locus,
Like is he talking to Duke? Do you understand the Locust Horde is completely
fucking disorganized because like what the we don't understand the orders, Like, I
don't know. Then I think every single okay, so do you know how
do you know how? Like in what is It? Uh, Charlie and
the Chocolate Factory, all the all the opops were played by that that uh
what is it? Indian? The Indian actor Deep Roy. I think his
name is the same guy like cloned a bunch. I think all the locust
should be one guy? Who should who should every locust be? We gotta
think about this and this might make its way into the fucking rewrite as possible.
We're laying on the groundwork. Who should be every single local receiving the
film? It should be it should be the guy that it should be the
people that attacked just now we don't know what they look like. That's right,
it would probably it's just like just like Nigerian guys. What about John
Lebizamo? Who's that? Joe Pesci Joe great crazy, that's terrible. Okay,
you gears, motherfucking you. You you grind, grind, grind,
Oh my god, grind you mother fuck up grind. Joe Pete was shorter
than me when I was seven. Bro. Yeah, he's camera burst or
what the name of the chainsaw guns called the Lancer? Mused? The Lancer
is so funny that I know it's heavy meal weird. Can I say it's
mega weird to me that you guessed hammer burst first, because that, to
me is way more forgettable. The Hammerberg is a more iconic name than the
Lanser. To me, I think that's why I guess there are more things
called Lancer. I guess because there's like a diner here. For me,
the hammer birds sounds so much cooler. Also, when you play P v
P, you would you would always use the Hambergs instead of the gum of
the Lancer. I would never use I would never use the hammer The Lancer
is a better close range gun, but the Hamberg is better for head shots.
Three You're dead, You're dead. Three. It was like the snap
in the balltok where it's like I'm using the balltalk every time. Yeah,
no, for sure, for sure, but uh yeah who that game particularly
two online? Oh my god, I played the dom should be Dom should
be Johnson, Ray William No, get him, get him out of here?
Would be any Hispanic person? Oh Norman readers? That would that would
so many people off the same? Sure, Norman, Dominic Santiago. And
who is Marcus? Who's Marcus again? We didn't No, no, that's
Marcus Phoenix should be but we know Marcus Phoenix should be the guy got voices
bender, Oh, just bring in fucking John Demaggio. Just actually bring him
in as mars Venus is John says, that's him, right, Yeah,
yeah, honestly, that would be. That would just be a good idea.
Probably would Yeah, it's too good of an idea. Sure something's going
to be in that show somehow, Like he's gonna be in that show somehow,
I'm so sure of it. Or like Jake the Dog. I don't
know what would would be better if he actually found my name is Jake the
Dog again, I'm having fun with my friends, or Phoenix, Marcus Phoenix
as Jake the Dog going around like I'm making pancakes, Like that's fucking insaneing
bacon pancakes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, bacon pank African. I haven't
seen that show on making pancakes, making pancakes. Actually, when Finn's voice
started changing, I kind of like fell off. I finished it was bad
or anything. I just like fell off. I never watched this single episode
like I watched, like really, I really like the show. I've heard
it was good. It just like it came at a time where I was
just kind of feeling like, I don't you know what it was. It
just the art style to me just kind of felt like I didn't it for
us. It was it was a little late for us, a little late
if it came out, definitely for me. My friend just showed it to
me, and I'm sure it's a good show. I have no doubt show.
I've seen clips of it that cracked me the funk up. I will
say, like, there's a there's a there's a scene where like a deer
stomps on Finn's legs and breaks them like twice, and like his legs fold
up like a fucking I don't even know. I don't know how to describe
it. But it's like it is one of the funniest things I've ever seen,
and I I could not stop laughing when I saw that. Or there's
one takes that scene is that he takes his shoes off. He's got little
hands underneath. There's also one where it's like, I don't remember what the
fuck this was. I saw it in like a like a TikTok compilation where
like I think Jake gets bitten by like a fucking small like I don't know,
like some bug bites him like a spider, and then he like he
he falls to his knees and opens his mouth to scream, but he's like
being silent. And there's something about that scene that fucking kills me every time
I see it, because like that's so much pain that you can't you can't
even vocalize, and it's so like I relate to it so hard. He's
like shaking. I love it, But I don't actually said that I watched
the show. Maybe maybe I'm just a show is really good. If it
came up we were like fourteen, Like it came when we were fourteen,
that would have been our generation show probably sure, But unfortunately it came out
when we were like, like, you're going into being eighteen nineteen year olds.
Yeah, I was like, I was like twenty five the first time
I saw it, So I was like, oh, yeah, it's too
late for you to watch this. I really like it. I sujoy.
I watched every episode of it. I watched a new series too. It
really touched it was at that time. It was at that time for us
where we were transitioning out of watching that kind of stuff where it's like if
I I haven't feel like if I found it later, where I was like,
well, like, well beyond it, I probably would have been a
lot more like willing to watch it because it's just like, oh, well,
fucking whatever. It's some cartoon that I hear is good. I haven't
seen a cartoon in a while. Uh maybe you know. Oh yeah,
anyway, Uh so let's get let's get two more. Let's do it.
Let's get two more. Let me find a find a delectable little question from
our from our. We're gonna beat the We're gonna beat the some out of
a thick fresh oak. Have you guys seen black Ula Flow? I have
seen I've not seen black Ula Flow. Yeah, we were tagged in that
show on Instagram. Him, I didn't see it. I love how confused
the Blackula Flow guy seems. He seems very confused. I'm sure I saw
people dressed as Dracula Flow for for Christmas, for Halloween, and that was
kind that's kind of like, that's that's sick. I love that. Okay,
scooped scooped James Rodin. He says, Hello, my honorary f slurs.
Being men of the heterosexual persuasion, how have your partners reacted to your
collaborative gay parodies, by the way, as a bye guy, give you
all the f slur paths. Don't worry, we don't need it. However,
what however, what partners if our people were dating, our wives,
our girlfriends, whatever. Oh my my. I feel like Jojo is in
some ways she's more immature than me, Like when it comes to like sense
of humor, which is like kind of wild to me because some of the
ship that she shows me I shake my head at. I'm just like,
I'm like, come on, man, Like some of the she's like tags
me and I'm like what so, yeah, that's uh, it's right up,
it's all good man. So she completely understands it. It's all.
It's all like I have never I don't think. I don't even think I've
slept with a person who didn't think what I the things that I thought were
funny were funny, you know what I mean, Like like I'm not that's
that's such a lucky you guys, that's that's not true for me. Actually,
that is the first thing. That's my that's my way in man like,
like that's that's how I get into that situation in the first place.
So like, if I have something that I think is hilarious and the person
I'm dating or sleeping with doesn't think it's funny, that can't happen because that
would have never even been a possibility. I doesn't think anything I do is
funny. You think something like not funny at all, Like none of my
friends are funny. You're just coasting off of pure just attraction. I guess
she's just just like, yeah, that's uh, that's kind of crazy.
That's so so distressing. Yeah, humor is the I always say. I
always say, like, there's literally lily Lily, since the humor has gotten
so warped being in a relationship with me and being around my friends for so
long that she is nowhere near the person she was before. Now she's like,
dude, I'm not gonna know I folding her. I get it.
I guess significantly altered our times of humor, like really badly, to the
point now that she laughs at She's like, I would have never laughed at
that before. Good, because that's I can't I would not be able to
date some lame ass chick. I've I've slept with lame ass women, of
course, like you know, like just in Yeah, basically that's wild man
like you. Oh, I definitely definitely have some lame ass girls before.
That's crazy lucky you use he just loses check one too. God damn it,
What the hell is that? Yeah? Let me make sure you record
everything good, everything all sexy. Hell Yeah, okay, okay, okay.
I just been on like a lot of you know, back in the
dating app days, you would just kind of meet some chicks. I've met
one I've it's usually it's I'm be honest, it's it's the bleeding heart liberals.
Every single time I've had like a bad date, it was just the
ones that were way too progressive. You know. I've lived in Cali most
of my life and so like, of course most women are liberal progressive,
but there's the ones that are like, you know, doing They're like that,
They're like, you know, I'm like, yo, calm down.
There's one chick's talking about she cried her eyes out when with her mom when
Trump won, and I'm like, oh God, here we go. Like
I'm like, I understand you're upset, but like you fucking were like that
upset. I was like, oh this chicks, Yeah, I can't.
I can't even Yeah, humor is my my way in like I've never i
know, really operated on dating apps because I just don't. I just never
cared to. It's just always like been like this is a way I always
felt like, even like really early on that it's like there's something I don't
care, Like it's it's pussy that doesn't think I'm funny, you know what
I mean, Like I don't need that, bro, I I've stuck with
girls I look back like maybe this is really sad. This is really really
really sad. It's gonna bring you back to like some shit. There have
been out of I've said with like maybe eleven women, and out of the
other woman I supp with maybe three of them. I genuinely had respect.
I respect them, like for real, Like this is not even like me
being a crazy, like me being a joke, like me going like is
he like when I look back at them as people and I'm like, okay,
who you were such at the time, I just fucked because you were
attractive. I can sincerely say that's only true for that's we have the reverse
like it's only one person in my in my entire history where I'm like that
wasn't you know there's there's there's literally nothing there. There is my you don't
have to name you have to name it. There's one other one, and
there's one one other two, there's other like yeah, it's like and then
one of them is like sort of yeah, I'm trying to bring I'm trying
to bring them out into the woodwork by you never know who's listening to the
show, bro, I'm not going to drop their names, but like yeah,
like it's dude, why one time this was funny that this even happened.
Where uh, there was this German girl that I was involved with like
years ago, and I got asked, I haven't done Instagram Q and A
in a long time. Actually, forgot about that. I used to do
that every once in a while. But yeah, the somebody asked me a
question about like, oh, if you ever I forgot what the question was,
but had to do with something, you know, related to dating or
something like that, and I was like, oh, yeah, there's German
chick I was with, you know, she was really pretty whatever all this
stuff and fucking I get a DM from merchants like what's open. I'm like,
what the fuck? Like I I had no idea, like you,
you were following me this whole fucking time, so like it just you never
know. I never I never crashed her anything. Crowd careful, brother,
because you don't know, like you you might say some fucked up ship about
somebody had no idea to follow you because you're your public figure. And so
it's like a stupid fucking crowd bitch. I can't stand her cool, she's
fine. You can't trust them. You can't trust the crowd. That is
true, you can't. I will say that. I will say I don't
give she hears this or not. I don't care. She did have a
grandpa that had fucking Nazi perfect and I was like, that's ultra illegal.
That is wild. They're even telling me this was in Germany. Yeah she
was, but you know she came here. Okay, good, that is
like it's not good to have here, but there over there ultra legal.
It's I'm like, you probably but which let me know that. I'm like,
oh, her grandpa is really you know, he's probably one of the
last Did you see what in Canada when they applauded that fucking SS officer.
Yeah, like it was like one of those things where he's probably one of
the last ones that probably did some shit. You know what I mean.
I can't stand Canadians, bro, Like I really have a serious, like
just disdain for them. I mean, because they're so wrong, so proudly
wrong about shit. Dude. Look, I'm I if this is all I'm
gonna say. I I agree with these certain extent, but keeping moving to
Canada as an option if things get too dicey in this country, which I
don't know, man, I'm I'm I'm gonna say, I'm a little bit.
I'm a little bit concerned. I wasn't before. I'm a little bit
concerned after the shit that's going on in the Middle East because everyone hates what
I don't feel I feel like Trump might win just because anything he does his
his bases and phase by it right. But like the other side, people
are so disappointed with Biden's response and blah blah blah and this and that and
everything that's going on, and I'm like, oh my god, he's probably
gonna lose enough support where everyone I was like, oh no, I'm a
fucking my options open man. That's all I know. It's the same.
It's the same fucking saying I am. It's such a boring, fucking rerun
of the same ship. God damn it. All I know, I'm not
going to get that ship. I'd rather I'd rather die here. I'd rather
die miserably here than live successfully in Canada. I'm not even joking because then
because because the thing is like, because I don't know, it sound about
sharing a border with XQUC, Like I just don't. Well, we're not
gonna move to fucking Quebec. Fuck that Quebec anywhere. It's all. It's
all Quebec, brother, I don't know. British Columbia. British Columbia would
be nice, we go up there. All we gotta do is go north.
British Columbia accent, living vancou right there, Stop saying stuff like that.
All right, two more things, okay, go ahea, guy,
let's go. It's two more things and then and then and then we're out
right. I don't want to make this because I'm making me sick. Parker
Lucanback wrote in he says, dear squirting sarens in my company messaging app and
admin employee recently posted a pic of a grandma in Resin. But it wasn't
the one Chris posted. It was a different old woman room and family.
I thought it was insane because I was listening to the stark thing when I
saw it. This is the most famous thing I've ever done. This.
This is without a doubt. When I posted that grandmother in Resin, I
had no fucking idea that it would be like sent this far out to the
point where like now, it's a trend where there are different ones. That's
insane. I don't know what I've done, but I just wanted to read
that because I thought that was crazy. But it's it's pretty cool. It's
pretty cool to be uh it. It feels good. It feels good.
It a little bit right. It was good to be remembered. You know,
it feels good to like have a little bit of a some stupid bullshit
that you put up. I don't mind it at all. I think I
think it's awesome. I don't know, like it's like the I did the
lol nice reach thing too, and I'm always happy when I see that.
I don't really get there. People will make a big deal about like,
oh man, I made this meme and it wasn't credited, and it's like
I get it on a base ethical level, but at the same time as
somebody who has made enough of that stuff that's like exploded into cultural zeitgeist and
never get credit for it. I'm just like, I mean, that's the
point of it, isn't it. Like the whole point of a meme like
that is to get a round. Like You're not gonna make money off it.
It's a fucking meme, So like, what's Yeah, I don't know.
I've just never really to me, I must care if I've spent a
lot of time on something, that's all like if it's like a meme,
which is no time at all, please, that's what I mean. It's
like if it's different, if it's like a video or a song or like
a whole fucking production that like took a lot of time and like mixing and
editing and all this color correction, all this fucking shit and then it just
gets spliced and uncredited and free booted on Facebook and then it makes some money
for other people. But like, I don't know, fucking image that I
thought. I thought of all this shit. I thought of all this ship
and executed it and posted it within a span of like five minutes max for
all three of them. So it's like what I don't know, man,
But uh la la la la all nice reach reach rereach reach reach rereach reach
reach we rereach read rereach, rereach rereach. I'm trying to have fun.
I see what you're doing that really made me want to quit. Imagine imagine
the ship that we've said on this show. That's what does me in imagine
was unlikable, something that like I just want to kill myself. It's crazy.
I don't want to be here no more. All right, miss well,
here's the last one. Mister Beast's voice wrote in or mister Beast's voice,
mister Hans, mister, he says, do you guys have any false
memories that you swear happened. I remember Harry Belafonte speaking at Obama's inauguration and
then dying like a week later because he defeated racism and could finally rest.
I don't know how true that is, but I definitely had that. Dude,
I thought, for sure, this is not a joke or anything.
I thought John Goodman died like ten years ago or like fucking like ages ago,
like a long fucking time ago. And I found out only like in
the last like three years that he's like, no, he's still around.
I'm just like, what the fuck I could have sworn, Like I remember,
I had vivid memories of people being like, oh, rip, you
know John Goodman, and fucking posting clips of fucking Sully and Ship. I'm
just like, I guess I dreamed this or something. No, it was
Sully. I thought he died too for some reason. I don't remember why
that that. Okay, well, that upsets me because now I thought I
was willing that I was willing to chalk that up to a fucking dream.
But now that you remember that too, it makes me really sad and really
scared of what the world is. But yeah, I don't know that's the
one that that comes to mind immediately. I'm sure there's other examples. Yeah,
that's why I think. I I just can't think of anything off the
top of my head, though I know I play. Definitely there was someone
who I thought died too, and I just don't. I just don't remember
who they are. There's also people that I thought were still alive better that
are not, that are fucking not dead at all. But yeah, definitely
who do just like some mandelas though I think that are pretty famous that I
bought into as well, like the the Shazam thing. I was one of
those people that was a genie movie of the Simbad. The comedian was dead
for a long time and I was like, oh, they're not dead.
I think it was. I think it was with his name Obama no our
Citio Hall. I don't know if you guys know what our citial Hall is.
Of course I do, but I thought he died. Wait a minute,
Wait a minute, wait minut, wait a minute, wait a minute,
He's not dead. I think he even tried to like no, no,
no, no no, I don't like trying to bring his stupid show
back too. He came back. Our Senio Hall. Oh my fucking god,
I can't do this anymore. Reality is so fucking fractured. I can't
do it. I can't do it. I really didn't think. I don't
know why I didn't. I don't remember him dying. I just kind of
remember. I just assumed that he was gone. That's I've been seeing some
dickhead. I just want to say this real quick. I've been seeing this
guy gas I think. I don't know if he's doing it on purpose or
not, but he's on TikTok and Instagram gas lighting people about certain things,
like, uh, he was saying, oh, did you know that Michael
Jackson smooth Criminal. It doesn't say like when you when you think of that
song right before he says smooth criminal, what does he say? It's like,
you've been hit by. You've been struck by a smooth criminal. And
he's like, but did you know he doesn't say that you only he says
you've been hit by twice, and like there's a bunch of people in the
comments sect You're like, well, that's crazy because he plays the music video
version and it just says you've been hit by, You've been hit by,
and it never says struck by any music video version, and so people are
like, oh, what the fuck this whole time, and I'm like,
no, that is not true. The single version, the album version,
the Actually I was like, you're fucking with people right now. I don't
know if he's doing it all. I appreciate that you lies, though,
that's the thing. You like lying, you think it you do it for
fun, which is insane. What do you mean you show fun? You're
supposed to lie when you need to, not for kicks. Yeah, oh
you know one one that's that crazy though. This is the one that like
kind of fucked my mind. I feel like it fucked everybody's mind. Mirror
Mirror on the Wall. That ain't what that it says? She says the
magic mirror on the wall, Mirror mirror on the wall. Who's the gayest
one of all? Or whatever, who's the dumbest black? But she says
magic mirror on the wall. And that one made my head fucking explode because
one of my favorite songs by hardcore band Barrier Dead. They have a whole
theme album. It's called Beauty and the Breakdown, and so all their songs
are about like Disney things or it's not about it, it's just their names
are that. And so one of my favorite songs of theirs is called Mirror
Mirror, and it's just like that is that one made my head explode because
I'm like, no, it has to be mirror miror. Everybody says miror
mirror, Like why would everybody get that wrong? But I guess it's the
same way as like Luke I Am your Father kind of a thing, where
so I guess it's like similar to that. But still I'm like, no,
no, this is depit. She don't say magic mirror, but she
does. I was like, this is this isn't real? That one kind
of fuck with me. That one fuck with me good mad Mirror, which
makes way more sense than saying mirror twice. It makes like, if you
think of it in context, why would you say mirror? Well, I
mean it's like it's already kind of it already kind of rhymes. But I
say, when you actually think of it like objectively, like why then would
mirror mirror? It's like what you already said, you can just say,
you just say my name is a mirror. I'm a fucking mirror, dude,
I'm a fucking I am a fucking mirror, dude. Come on,
bro, mirror my nigga. Yeah. Anyway, I gotta watch Sleep and
Beauty again. Goddamn Jesus Christ. All right, let's uh Cinderella. I
just know which one it is, dude, I don't know. I was
telling people recently like I feel like Cinderella would be like, like the name
Cinderella sounds like if it were it not for the fact that it was associated
with a Disney movie and like a kid's fairy tale. I feel like Cinderella
would be like a really agi name. There's something about you know what I
mean, Like the idea is like Cinders in there, like fucking you know,
I don't strip her name Cinder. Was she black? She was not
as bullshit, she was indeed not black. She didn't give a lap dance
to our friend to the fucking eye to eye from the fucking Goofy movie.
That's something that I very very I yeah, it's very It was very not
sexy. Yeah, I was whatever, the opposite of chop dish. The
fine would never be far apart. It was not. It was. It
was very jarring to see. Uh. Anyway, let's read. Let's read
our name the names are our beautiful Well, I don't know if you guys,
I don't want to I don't want to come. Damn, it's right,
these are don't I don't don't trip. Some people are beautiful. I've
seen some beautiful homeless women. I've freaked out. Can I say this?
I like this is insane. I've seen that is insane. But I saw
a TikTok recently of some guy do you might get you guys remember Susan Boyle?
Yes, Oh my gosh, you gotta make over? No? No,
no, So there's a TikTok of some guy being like, hey,
now that I'm an adult, do you guys remember Susan Boyle? And like
he's talking about like how like fuck? That situation was like everybody was somehow
surprised that this ugly woman can sing, and it's like, why would you
be surprised that an ugly woman can sing? Looks don't have anything to do
with fucking talent, And it's like, can we stop pretending like where like
these amazing fucking people that are just beyond everybody else. If a fucking gollumn
came up to you, if a fucking you'd preacher crawled out of the fucking
sewer, stood up at you, and started singing the most beautiful song you've
ever fucking heard in your life. You would be surprised, you would,
You would be it would be surprised. It's different, Chris. No,
there's no difference. We have assumptions. We have assumptions for reasons, Chris,
Chris, Chris. If a gollumn, that's not a human. If
a person is, say, man, you're taking that way too little,
it is surprised. It is not surprise. It is not surprising that people
would be surprised a hideous motherfucker, because just people don't generally have good sounding
voices at all, especially on this on this TV show that was specifically famous
for people going up there and failing really hard. Of course, the expectation
was like, Wow, this person looks weird. They're probably gonna be really
fucking bad, like most people on the show who also look weird and are
really fucking bad. Of course, like the I don't like this, like
retroactive, like hmm, I'm such a good person because I didn't make such
an assumption, And it's like, shut the up, No, that's a
we tell tales that is how stories have been told since stories began. Where
the Hadias monster sounds demonic and scary and you don't jealous. It's not even
I guess it is. That is storytelling, one on one. It is
the most basic good versus evil vague, but the person is usually bad.
It's not exactly there's there's a stories that go on about people being like yes,
you're like, yes, what you're saying, you're saying right, you're
right, you're right. Truth. That is just the basis of storytelling,
the story being so literal. Of course, not always there is no absolution.
Okay those are, but there are liars, but you're focusing on outliers.
That doesn't matter, Like that is not a part of the conversation.
I am surprised whenever strangers don't attack me. That's a seriously bad state of
mind. That is the really like the fact that you just said that is
insane. It is after I just assume, I assume, I assume did
you about your just was on your side realized you're a fucking maniac, because
well I have well, well, first of all, it's what's it's what
kept me alive. You're that guy who got like fucking stabbed before him.
Wouldn't happened to me, wouldn't happen to me? Sorry, but sorry about
it. They don't have rose that I had that kept me alive. Ue
your mouth. You were like, the fact that people don't kill me all
the time is insane to me? Is such wild state of humans. You're
so much from a thousands years ago where that was a real prospect. You
from the nineties, dude, Dude, the videos I've seen, the videos
I've seen, and people just shooting each for no reason, or like sucker
punching people from the back for no fucking raison, or just like doing all
this crazy ship for no fucking reason, as conditioned be to suspect everybody I
don't know of just immediately like I don't know, I can't know. How
the am I gonna know? I'm not gonna get caught lacking? All right,
let me tell you that much. There that guy who was like that
guy who was like screaming in the diner when I was getting my food,
I was like, I might I might get fucking shot up today, might
be. I was immediately like I was, I was in a mode or
I was like, all right, how am I going to kill this guy
if I need to. If I need to kill this guy, his face
get crazy. It's kind of fucked up where my thought isn't like how am
I going to beat them? It's like, ew, how am I going
to stay clean? That is my first thought. That's why you guys talk
about me being crazy. But Derek's like, how am I gonna eat this
niggah out? Getting blood in my tongue? Like, you guys are fucking
psychos. You guys make me feel crazy all the time. To me,
they you live in a different world, the Kingson, you live in a
You live in a completely different world. I gotta be on high alert.
How am I gonna absorb this dude? Make this good food? To be?
Kingston doesn't. Kingston doesn't understand because he's like he's he's a wall,
you know what I mean. He's like seven foot nine, he's like fucking
he's got like a layer of like if I stabbed him, probably wouldn't even
hit his vital organs. You know, he's safe, he's safe from all
this ship. Like I've got to worry. I've gotta like I've got to
look around and be like, all right, you're a threat. You're a
threat. I'm gonna take you. Here's how I'm gonna take you out.
Your kneecaps are really exposed. I'm gonna get him. Like I can see
your scar. I can see the scar on your shin. That implies that
you're really weak there. I'm gonna go for that. I know. I
have a I have a takedown plan for every single stranger that I see,
because, yeah, cycle most of it, I'm gonna lie. I'm not
gonna lie. Most of it is just extreme unpredictable violence. Like most of
it, most of it is like if if you, if you, if
you pose a threat to me, I will just simply I will simply come
at you in a way that you can't possibly predict because I don't even know
what I'm gonna do. So that's what most of it. It's just a
barrage of over over stimulation. But some people swamp violence that people don't know
how to deal with exactly. But some people I see like, oh man,
okay, you've got I see the scar. Okay, and all right,
that's a weak point. Or some people I'm like hearing aid, Okay,
all right, cool, classes, Okay, what's the prescription. I
can tell what the prescription. It's just based on looking at it because I
understand my own. It's like, okay, that's minus five. I don't
know, man, I you just gotta you gotta know, complete swamp fuck
of extreme violence. That's I will fucking go to anyone that doesn't have any
fight experience. You're gonna fight. The best thing you can do. The
problem is in the in the moment. You don't think about it, right,
but cover your fucking face, put your guard up, look down at
their knees, and then skiper extend those motherfuckers stomping. That's crazy too.
I'm not nervous, and I'm not nervous in those situations anymore. Like there's
the train. Yeah, because I know, I know, I know how
to knock someone out if I really have especially if they if they're not fucking
boxing, you know what I mean. And I like, I don't have
to worry about that shit. I don't got to worry about gloves or anything.
Yeah, Like I know how to I know exactly how to deal with
this. Was thing about going around out four am with your boxing gloves is
knocking some people out, that is coat. I will get killed someone.
Someone will simply hit me with their car. I'll be like, that's a
dangerous person. I'm gonna hit them with my car, and then no one's
gonna care because everybody's gonna be like, what's this lunatic doing around running around
it with boxing gloves at four It's fair It's Halloween. So next year,
Halloween twenty twenty four. So how does that make you feel? Though?
Actually like serious also also decides seriously, how does it feel now knowing that
you are you are capable of really knocking someone the fuck out? Now?
How does that feel? I was pretty confident that I could do that before,
but I'm extra confident now, and I'm not nervous about it. I'm
not nervous about the prospect of it. So it's it feels good, but
at the same time, it's like it's it's still like, I'm not gonna
put myself in unnecessarily dangerous situations, you know what I mean. I'm not
gonna wander around at Brooklyn at four am just to clear my head or whatever
the I got. I respect it, dude. I think it's really really
dope, Like, like, overall, I don't give you enough credit.
About anything that I can't stand you. But you're you're doing that training for
the box and ship was really really, really impressive. I was like,
dang, this dude's really gonna do this. I'm I I thought he was
gonna die. But no, nothing, Yeah, you should do it.
You should do it, man, maybe if not the fight, If not
the fight, just like training. I've been working like like three months and
I've trimmed down a little bit, but I would definitely love to do it.
I would definitely love to do a commuter class. I gotta I gotta
actually up my workout regimen a bit more at the very least. Dude,
just the training itself. Need a fucking diet, man, that's the part
that kills everybody. That's that everybody doesn't want to like. That was the
hardest part. That was the hardest part, without a fucking shadow of that
was eating the right ship. Yeah, bro, right now I'm doing uh,
right now, I'm doing I'm doing some extreme fasting, but for also
other reasons because my stoma is a little fucked up, so I'm just doing
one meal a day right now. Sorry, immediate. Like I was talking
to this as my friend of mine was like, it's really unfortunate that,
Like, my first reaction to hearing anything is like, what is the like,
what is the most amusing response to that? Like, what response can
I say to this that would that would make me laugh? It's always either
like it's always like an insult or just something that's untrue, and so I
have to like sometimes I just be like, hey, listen, I'm sorry
I said that. I don't have to act like that though. That's the
thing. I just like it's fun for me. I don't know, like
I like it and I like making people laughing. It's fun. It's fun.
It's you don't enjoy making people laughing soon, I don't enjoy being mean
to people no reason. Well, that was more for the show. That
was more for that was more for the law. That's more for the Yeah,
I was, I was simply meming a little bit. It's man,
I'm not really doing this for no reason, dude, the sheer memage.
Let's read these fucking names of our twenty five dollars up homeless patrons who have
been kind enough to support us. These destitute motherfuckers are the reason this show
continues to thrive and do well, So thank you all uh, Sweeney will
count me down three no county down in a cont me down in a homeless
way, three two one. That's really offensive. I don't know what you
think. Reindeer had a very shiny cock, and if you ever saw it,
you could even say you'd blow Solid Slug bro by the way, already
with the Christmas ship, I've seen decorations already. It's like it's it's November
third, already with the fucking Christmas ship. Anyway, Solid Slug Gayleen who
welds nutsacks pussy juice Jesus fucking Christ, I definite think I'd have to think
about that. If they had a pussy juice flavored bait man, I would
not use it, can you? Fucking event The FNAFF porn parody featuring Freddie
fuck bear Incell turned transfem Alexander the Gay The Adventures of slender Man and Thin
Boy sucking down a crisp diet cock. I mean diet cock, I mean
diet cock, I mean diet cock. Gay Alison Chains, Yeah, they've
come to fuck the rooster. Throw your cum in the air and spray it
like you just don't care if dick, if you like dick and balls and
all that gay shit. Everybody John my friends have three or was out me
Guido the fourth? I listened to every episode of the Stark Tacond I got
was this lousy dick. I'm not afraid to fuck a man. Everybody come
in my hand, will sing, will suck this hog together? Not afraid,
uh parentheses to fuck a man by seamen m I'm not afraid to everybody
come in and talk together through the calm, every weather, through the colm.
Let you know that you got to come holla if you feel like you
need some fucking come What do I feel like it would be so angry about
he would actually I feel like he'd be really mad about this. We should
we should do an eminem one at some point. I don't know what we
I don't know what we're gonna do, but like he can you get distract
snark tank, distract little white supremacists, white supremacist nerds would take a genesis
white supremacist and sega genesis. That is how you write that ship. Yeah
there you go. God, that really fucking threw me upson and I just
suck fat pits and pits ship hard fast. Everybody even to stop with the
britten slander. It already sucks here. Listening to Sena makes me consider racist
and baller the first sin. There goes my homo. Watch him as she
blows gape with it of the machine two episodes remaining be afraid. He's mount
on the two episodes for a while. His long penis is killing me.
I must confess I drank his seed when I'm not with the boys. My
prostate's fine. You failed me so fine. I don't know what that is.
Uh, do you gotta put the name of the song in front of
the end? Is killing damn it. It's not coming to me, but
I know that break me. Damn, We've had that a couple of times.
That's not it, jolly old dipship, mister beasts voice, mister hens
forgot urethraw agonizer. Damn. If you like penis a lot of getting caught
in the rain. If you're not in der girl and you love any pain.
I've gaped my dudes, gay after guy or guy after guy. I
had my ass spread penetrated five times and big penis I ate a few.
I had my share of cumshot. I don't know what this is. I
don't know what it is. I don't know what. I don't know what
it is either. They call my squad the goonies because we all have public
indecency charges. That's crazy. That's pretty pretty good crazy funny as if that
was If that was condensed a little bit, that's a solid bar. You
could find something to go with that. I'm trying to pick out. I'm
trying to come, Walter, get a glass. I want to see it,
Walter, I'm squirt and get a glass. It's a heavy flow.
It's a heavy flow, Walter. I'm period dating, Walter, I'm period
water period about a really stick down there, Walter, Sweet, look my
weedie gayo. Here comes the penis up this butt. We get harder,
then we suck on cock. We gon fuck the bussy until it gets too
soft. That's hey, man. You know sometimes you gotta sometimes you gotta
work through the red Sea penis yelling and Sweeney over Spider Man. But anyone
on this on this planet, Yeah, Nigga's like, wow, I'm good
on that, bro. I only only a coward. That's why you could.
If you're savage. I'm not a savage. If you're not on your
period, I don't want it, dude. If you're not on your period.
I want no part of it. Chain my god, here fucking you're
a demon. Bro. Bro. I'm gonna have kids one day and I'm
gonna be like, Yo, Dad, what the fuck was wrong with you?
Dad? I want to be you know what you have? The saying
goes, you know, the saying goes, son. If the pussy ain't
pennies, I don't want any you know damn uh yew Spider Man, maybe
come all over my programming songs, The Everlasting Gaze back to Tank have come?
Really this this show has gotten so fucking out of pocket over time.
Caucasian container, the cracker barrel for gays, tinfoil tyrant, putting black face
on my life, pulps penis man, do Christian girls squirt holy water?
I look, I looked too long into Craven's eyes, and it made me
gay. Sweeney Sweeney, Sweeney swallowed my peeni BC sings. Weren't you the
one who tried to fuck my intestines? You think I'd bend over you to
get spread my ass out wide? Oh no, not I I coming,
guys. You know what's crazy. For a little bit of time, I
was I had a little bit lower energy in general on the podcast, and
then I just started bugging out again. Yes it is, oh my god
enough, I'm trying to keep it subtle than that. Jesus, we gotta.
I love the idea of like the friends logo we were, It's just
it just has end but like it, but it's not even spaced out as
if we brought it together. It's just like, you know, oh my
god, I don't know whatever, don't know. So no one told let's
hear the fourth one of these. Sorry stopped immediately. Example. I was
literally Example was like, that'd be a good thing to say. She put
it on my Pippa possums better at skating listening to you, Elbert elber Gone,
average clin energy. New reality show TV Pedophile Battle Royale Winter gets a
kid. That's damn, it's just a it's just a fifty year old band
with this is a fifty year old band with pigtails and tight clothes are gonna
a kid. But it's just some fucking guy. It's just it's some old,
some elderly where's my mommy, I'm looking for my mommy. I'm lost
my mommy for me, it's just fucking Mike arbent trouts When where's my diaby?
Will you will you? Will you change me? Jged Me said fucking
Pixie Dicks. If you got him, change change me. That's so fucking
vapid. Oh my god, what baby shark? Do do? Do?
Do? Do? Baby shop? Baby gonna get At what point? At
what point do you guys think this show is just gonna become mostly the credits
it just sleeping more and more. The more we grow, the more that
is going to have to become an acceptable reality. The more homeless people we
get on board. Uh, in the in the tier listen here you listen.
We're gonna have We're gonna have an army. We're gonna have an army
of the destitute at our beck and call all these people like it. And
what's crazy about it too, It's like they're gonna be like the most dedicated
army because what do they you know, what do they got to lose?
Really, they're gonna they're gonna be so dedicated to the cause. We're gonna
be like I'm gonna be wearing Stark texts. That's what we should advertise.
I love that, you know how like every sandom has like a name,
not everyone, but they have like monsters, the Swifties or whatever like that
type of ship. Are we what do we call what do we call a
they? Bo? Bums? It was like, what's up, bums up
there? We're just gonna call our fan base the homeless the what's going on?
You destitute motherfuckers? That way, that way whenever, whenever, whenever
a serious that's what that way. Whenever, like a serious politician talks about
the homeless problem, We'll all quote reading, We'll be like, what do
you mean? What are you trying to say about our fan base? Back
off, We're living our lives like everybody else. The homeless the piece so
bad dude out there all right, pissing here, pissing here. I'm hey,
you got the chicken fries? Was good? All right? Alright,
alright. They should make petoshre go pros in prisons. You can see what
happens to them. I think that would be neat Star Coffee on twitch,
Bitch Martin, Mama, j F Martin and I f air Strike beaten to
death by Cat Denning's hits. Oh my god, oh man, Okay,
who's that she got? She got one? Yeah, dude, I think
I first saw on forty year old virgin I was like, that show is.
I don't care what that show is. But Cat Dennings broke. Cat
she's had big titt since I was like a pre teen and she was like
a teenager, and I was like, dang, bro the milk, the
milk cans. Cat Deennings is a snack for sure. Uh, she's been
blowing. I heard she's a fan of the show. So what's up,
Cat Deennings? Yeah's homeless on the three way. Okay, you can't do
that. You can't homeless, bitch? What's up? You want to what's
up? Bitch? What's up? Bitch? I'm a big fan of all
of our big titted homeless uh uh, listeners, I gotta stop gonna hear
me say this, like yo, I'm not fucking And lots of guys living
in the game has paradise, taking dinks, very size gremlin exposing people to
with like doant ninety million rogins of ionizing radiation. You not vin Panangelic DM.
His name's Apollo. He was a homo but after but that was thirty
years ago when he still had brose to blow. Uh. Craig the Canadian
and the words of the Great Max Or use crack when whenever we're whenever you
use your What the fuck is this? Use crack whenever you use the computer?
Okay? Cool? Uh, it's your boy, Shawne Dee. My
penis length so long it makes you say, oh, my lord, thank
you for fucking me in the butt. Real rough, thanks, cool,
really clever, awesome. My penis is so big it's low like fucking what
the hell I just posted in the chat? No, no, what do
you do? My penis is so big. There's more of it than there
is some other things. What is this you're sharing with me? What is
this you're sharing with me? I've seen this when the plane explodes. I
love this video. I'm glad you finally saw this. This is by dude
Man Seinfeld is a gift. Man. It's a gift to this world because
this would be not This wouldn't be funny if you didn't This wouldn't be as
funny if you didn't know the context of these two people, Like can you
put this in the episode? I'm gonna puts the cold open. It's so
good. What gets me is him swayed to the side, like I'm like
like horizontal as Jerry screaming the yank idea of your friend being yanked out of
a fucking plane like that is crazy. I was expect at all. You
gotta you just gotta continue imagine surviving that. You gotta be like, yeah,
my friend's gone. I'm surprised I haven't sent this to you guys,
because this was This is old. This is like twenty nineteen. It looks
old. Oh fuck, hell was good. Funny sound is so good at
the faces so funny. Oh my god, I know hilarious what I saw.
You definitely saw this one. Stop sending me. I thought you wanted
to end this. I do, but the memes are hidden. I just
pissed myself. I already pissed on the floor, and I just pissed in
my room. LIST had to deal with that later. He's gonna walk in
like, why is there a puddle of fucking Why is there another puddle of
piss in the room? Oh my god, this is so funny. This
is so fucking funny. I'm gonna steal this ship for sure, steal a
little gift I gave you guys. Oh man, come on, oh yeah,
I did see this one. This one's this one is stupid, but
uh, all right, gift I gave you, guys. Uh, school
shootings prove white people are best at a wee damage Ben Jerry's Funky Monkey Doctor
Robotics, Mean swing Machine, Dracula Flow got that Pinocchio Dick, Tell my
bitch I'm faithful, then fuck are like I meant it? Three x oh
letting, letting the people know that one piece has a better story than Halo
maxec destiny and the truth may hurt, slipping stroke and smoking joking Emoticon's going
like this morning outlet Key David Drip mh Lord of Drip, Matthew Perry getting
double teamed by both worms and maggots as he's laid to rest OPI you want
to blow me, docks me, stalk me, docs me, my friends,
stalk me, stalk me again. Rate me by Nirvana sung by Jack
Films. A pizza guy accidentally at Chris Hansen's house. Oh my god,
I came ants, just a whole bunch of ants that would ruin my life.
Gay piece. Uh fucking police coming hard as I thrust in pound avvy.
If I had a nickel for every Chris Raygun fan fiction that existed,
I would have two nickels. Oh, thank god, thank god, it's
not that many women. Guest suggestions denims Derek, So why Volana, Piers
qut Ley and that one lady from episode fourteen Watla five eighty three. I
feel gay? Fuck you blasting in the background of a cod Montage. Calm,
bend me down. You're drilling me. You're drilling me. I am
finished? Are you? The Puppini brothers in Porium are realistic Cami and Chunley
thigh shaped neck pillows, self tightening sould separately, donk Donkerson. Do you
see do you see banana man laying over his white hot ass? Here he
comes with a cum for me flowing freshly from his banana tree. You've got
to pay the trolls sold again to the boys Hole Gage six. Warm yourself
in this bussy sun and the semen he'll consume. I'll tell you stories of
a gayer time in a club where we once Blewe nice. Nice, It's
nice way to ruin fucking prayer. The refugee just coming after, just coming
after my my music. Thanks call my dick An advocates the way. Only
one, the only one whoever used it, is my grandpa thin. Lizzie's
song half Cast was about black fathers not thinking Phil Lyonett is black enough to
date their totters. Hey, O, I'm feeling pretty GAYO. I'll fuck
your a hole. Let's leave that mattress stain though, big scream boy a
mean lesbian Milford de kempt, I'm high on twelve. Jason Bourne's looking to
beat the combat of the fresh Oak. John Strickland, give me a second.
I need to make sure I'm not straight. My friends are in the
men's room getting ran through like the nickel plate Mark's eighteen eighty nine. Should
I catch Peter or do a completely useless pack flip and let him get fucked
up so bad he quits the fact that that is just the It's the world
is so funny. Yeah, yeah, the first Church of Keith David.
That was the other meme that he sent the chat, by the way,
was that meme of Miles Morales doing the dumb backflip. He actually flipped more
towards where he would have been hit. So fucked up is that he doesn't
even get off the way with it. He just does a flip and Peter
hits the wall so hard and it's electrocuted, and Miles just like you good
Pete, he just like, at least canonically, Miles still sucks at that
point, you know what I mean. It's the beginning of this that's at
the beginning of the first game, so it's like it's it's relatively fair.
The First Church of Keith David featuring Chris is Team Fortress two scout looking ass,
ranting and raving about the name spider Man Miles Morales being gunned down by
the IDF because they think he's a Palatilian pre Rize play eight ninety six.
Brod Cox the ginger who looks like Edge here in with a tiny pp the
actual strap on lacy used to peg me being sold on eBay for sixty nine
thousand dollars. Thanks for the cunny linguist recommendation. It's in the playlist now
getting suspended from school from mis pronouncing that one African country hold like a bull
Chili, Yeah, foes foes genuine. What's up home, Homie, Alasko
ifield trash, Texas state of Salad, insane Latino bussy. Remember remember by
et ten is a trojan horse. Sue Hulk took on my ass hair,
Thinkiki, Chris, it's Marcus. We lost another car Mine do a giant
worm Sea is fine, but there are only twenty three left. Uh uh
the a roughly human shaped pile of red flags. Emoticon's going like this,
Gaytrekan, she'd be like, fuck you, ass, I'm gonna fuck you.
Ask Jacks DuPont badly Brave Hugger, Derek duck Hunt, Goliath voice You've
I've been denied everything, even my com ethery in Prgerian Hunter Melphus One,
the angriest Crout enjoying the view from on d Lee Plaza from the sixth floor
and browning out our list is always the king of haphazard. God, Bless
God, bless Everyoneam Well, I'm gonna go be it. Brown. Hope
everybody stays safe. Have a good weekend. Don't all right? Everybody really?
Brown? God's dead. They killed God with a fucking plastic spoon in
Detroit, Michigan. Watch out, all right, let's fucking end it.
You got me wooldoo, you got me, Walter, I was here a
rape God. You got me, Walter, You got me,