WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.160 --> 00:00:05.040 Hello, everyone, Welcome back to another episode of Let's Talk the Things. 2 00:00:05.679 --> 00:00:11.439 I am your host, Ash and on this episode we are talking to things 3 00:00:11.599 --> 00:00:17.359 about a culmination of topics that we covered this year. However, we're going 4 00:00:17.399 --> 00:00:23.160 to mainly focus on the importance of character. So as you listen to this 5 00:00:23.239 --> 00:00:29.559 episode, my hope, as usual is that you laugh, experience introspection, 6 00:00:30.440 --> 00:00:35.320 and maybe even reconsider some of your views. Now, grab your tea, 7 00:00:35.719 --> 00:00:42.039 coffee, or a glass of wine, and let's talk the Things. The 8 00:00:42.119 --> 00:00:49.039 older I get, the more I realize and recognize the importance and the value 9 00:00:49.439 --> 00:00:58.960 of character, specifically someone having good character. And now more than ever, 10 00:00:59.520 --> 00:01:07.200 there's often a confusion of sorts about character versus personality. Most of us get 11 00:01:07.239 --> 00:01:12.000 to know new people or form opinions of people that we know, be a 12 00:01:12.079 --> 00:01:19.319 social media and birthday dinners at loud restaurants over a million a glass of champagne, 13 00:01:19.439 --> 00:01:23.280 And I mean, how well do you know someone in those circumstances? 14 00:01:23.359 --> 00:01:29.560 Right? And in those cases, if those people you're interacting with aren't persons 15 00:01:29.640 --> 00:01:34.599 you know on a deeper level, you likely know their personality, not their 16 00:01:34.719 --> 00:01:44.400 character. Think about it this way. Personality is that first impression that's exterior. 17 00:01:44.920 --> 00:01:49.680 So maybe an outfit or a car, something that catches your eye. 18 00:01:51.319 --> 00:01:57.120 Think of it as the Snapchat or Instagram filter of who that person is. 19 00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:05.439 A charming person will get you noticed and maybe even in the door. But 20 00:02:05.519 --> 00:02:10.319 a solid character, a good character, that is what will keep you in 21 00:02:10.360 --> 00:02:17.280 the building. Now, some of you may be saying to yourself, Ash, 22 00:02:17.919 --> 00:02:23.319 Relax, nobody cares about character, especially in this day and age. 23 00:02:23.840 --> 00:02:30.719 So why does character even matter? Well, you're not completely wrong. Yes, 24 00:02:31.080 --> 00:02:36.680 there are some people in this world that do not value character, and 25 00:02:36.719 --> 00:02:43.280 those are precisely the people you should stay far away from, right because people 26 00:02:43.360 --> 00:02:50.439 with bad character likely have no integrity, which means they are more likely to 27 00:02:50.520 --> 00:02:55.000 be willing to put you in a bad situation or even betray you. You 28 00:02:55.080 --> 00:03:02.560 see good character opens doors character. Well, that's like trying to sell a 29 00:03:02.599 --> 00:03:08.199 phone with a crack screen. Nobody wants it, no matter how shiny the 30 00:03:08.280 --> 00:03:15.599 cover is, no matter if it's the brand new Apple iPhone fifteen. Nobody's 31 00:03:15.639 --> 00:03:21.159 going to want a new phone if there's a crackscreen, because it's it's not 32 00:03:21.360 --> 00:03:23.439 useful, right, and it's probably going to cut you when you go to 33 00:03:23.599 --> 00:03:29.479 use it. Another analogy, if you love music like me is to think 34 00:03:29.520 --> 00:03:37.639 of character as being the silent conductor orchestrating the melodies of our actions. Integrity, 35 00:03:38.120 --> 00:03:46.280 kindness, resilience. Those are like the notes that compose our character symphony. 36 00:03:46.800 --> 00:03:53.719 So your character just doesn't influence the moment, it plants a masterpiece in 37 00:03:53.759 --> 00:03:58.439 your legacy and what people will say about you when you're no longer here, 38 00:03:58.680 --> 00:04:05.080 or what people say say about you when you're not around. Essentially, character 39 00:04:06.280 --> 00:04:14.560 is kind of like a silent force that shapes our actions and our choices and 40 00:04:15.039 --> 00:04:19.360 is a moral comp us to guide us on our journey. I equate it 41 00:04:19.399 --> 00:04:25.560 to or I think of it as discernment in a way, right, Like 42 00:04:26.199 --> 00:04:33.120 the ability to discern someone's character is very important. But also your own character 43 00:04:33.600 --> 00:04:38.879 is based on that discernment that you have, right, So it's not just 44 00:04:39.079 --> 00:04:46.639 about being good, it's about embodying integrity, resilience, empathy. Right. 45 00:04:46.360 --> 00:04:53.759 Character isn't just a choice. It's the sum of your consistent choices and your 46 00:04:53.839 --> 00:04:59.800 consistent actions, right, And it's something that helps guide us in this world 47 00:05:00.040 --> 00:05:02.800 because you're gonna be faced with choices every day. Every day you're faced with 48 00:05:02.920 --> 00:05:10.399 choices, and what you choose to me shows your character. Every day we're 49 00:05:10.480 --> 00:05:15.079 faced with choices of doing right and wrong, and every time we choose doing, 50 00:05:15.000 --> 00:05:19.560 every time we choose to do the right thing, that then enforces our 51 00:05:19.639 --> 00:05:27.920 good character, our good character traits, and it's very important. So at 52 00:05:27.920 --> 00:05:32.839 this point you might be thinking of someone who has poor character, but that 53 00:05:32.959 --> 00:05:41.399 person is loved and revered by many, furthering your initial thought of nobody cares 54 00:05:41.439 --> 00:05:45.959 about character these days. It's how many followers you have and how many people 55 00:05:46.120 --> 00:05:49.560 like you and like your Instagram or you know your Twitter or TikTok posts. 56 00:05:49.680 --> 00:05:57.680 Right, And while every situation is different, most of the time that person 57 00:05:58.519 --> 00:06:06.839 is likely surrounded by enablers. Ah boy, those enablers, those professional excuse 58 00:06:06.959 --> 00:06:15.160 makers, right, the architects of excuses and justifications, and when something goes 59 00:06:15.199 --> 00:06:20.319 wrong, they usually swoop in with their justifications for someone's wrongdoings, like a 60 00:06:20.439 --> 00:06:27.120 top Hollywood PR firm, you know, to paint a pretty picture over someone's 61 00:06:27.480 --> 00:06:34.279 wrong that they've done. And what sometimes these enablers don't realize is that this 62 00:06:34.480 --> 00:06:42.480 further contributes to the development of poor character. Right. Enablers may think they're 63 00:06:42.600 --> 00:06:47.600 helping or being supportive, but in actuality, they're doing that person a disservice, 64 00:06:48.240 --> 00:06:55.319 because accountability is the foundation of growth. That's how we grow when people 65 00:06:55.360 --> 00:06:58.519 hold us accountable, when people tell us, you know, what you did 66 00:06:58.639 --> 00:07:00.800 wasn't right, or what you said was right, or you know, I 67 00:07:01.360 --> 00:07:04.920 understand why you did this, but that part of it wasn't right. When 68 00:07:04.920 --> 00:07:10.839 people hold us accountable, that allows us to have a different train of thought, 69 00:07:11.680 --> 00:07:17.079 right, That allows us to step outside of ourselves and question something we 70 00:07:17.199 --> 00:07:21.639 might have done and make a different decision. However, when you're surrounded by 71 00:07:21.720 --> 00:07:29.279 people that make excuses for you, or agree with you blindly, or you 72 00:07:29.319 --> 00:07:33.079 know, just maybe even are afraid to say anything to you for fear of 73 00:07:33.120 --> 00:07:36.360 how you'll react, for fear of what you will do, anything of the 74 00:07:36.480 --> 00:07:43.120 sort, and now you're left dealing with an adult who's stuck in adolescence. 75 00:07:43.279 --> 00:07:46.800 Right, Because when you're in adolescence, when you're a child, you throw 76 00:07:46.839 --> 00:07:50.800 tantrums. And for some children, they throw tantrums and they eventually get what 77 00:07:50.839 --> 00:07:57.720 they want, right, And what sometimes parents don't understand or families don't understand, 78 00:07:57.800 --> 00:08:01.439 is that teaches that child that if they just throw a tantrum, they'll 79 00:08:01.439 --> 00:08:07.120 eventually get what they want, which can be very very very very very horrible 80 00:08:07.199 --> 00:08:13.079 in the long run, because these can grow into people that don't respect authority, 81 00:08:13.240 --> 00:08:20.800 that don't respect women, that don't respect themselves, that don't respect teachers, 82 00:08:20.800 --> 00:08:24.600 that don't respect their bosses because they have this thought that they should get 83 00:08:24.639 --> 00:08:28.720 what they want. And if they get angry enough, or they throw a 84 00:08:28.759 --> 00:08:33.440 tantrum or they you know, beat the desk in off or do something to 85 00:08:33.600 --> 00:08:39.519 instill that fair eventually, they'll always get what they want. And what this 86 00:08:39.639 --> 00:08:46.159 does is it enables this cycle of irresponsibility, right. And it's an all 87 00:08:46.240 --> 00:08:52.879 too familiar scenario where excuses become shields and accountability takes a back seat. And 88 00:08:54.159 --> 00:09:01.879 the thing is enablers reinforce excuses instead of whole bilding individuals accountable, right. 89 00:09:03.399 --> 00:09:07.279 And what they do is they're perpetuating a cycle of toxicity, aiding in the 90 00:09:07.320 --> 00:09:15.240 development of poor character. So if you tell someone a story and this could 91 00:09:15.279 --> 00:09:20.799 be your friend, family member, co worker, whoever, and they ask 92 00:09:22.879 --> 00:09:26.919 maybe no questions. Let's do one scenario they ask no questions and they just 93 00:09:26.960 --> 00:09:31.320 say, oh, oh my gosh, she's crazy. He's crazy. You're 94 00:09:31.519 --> 00:09:35.639 right, that person is a terrible person. You need to get rid of 95 00:09:35.679 --> 00:09:41.480 them and just blindly supports you, if they want to call it that blindly 96 00:09:41.519 --> 00:09:48.840 says you are one hundred percent correct. That doesn't help because maybe you're not 97 00:09:48.320 --> 00:09:52.159 one hundred percent correct, maybe you're not correct at all in what you did 98 00:09:54.039 --> 00:09:58.159 right, But that now feeds to you a sense of oh, I don't 99 00:09:58.200 --> 00:10:01.759 even need to like sit down with what you happened and tried to figure out 100 00:10:01.759 --> 00:10:05.519 if I had a role in it, because I'm right. Everybody's saying I'm 101 00:10:05.600 --> 00:10:11.399 right right, whereas I know for me, I'm blessed to be surrounded by 102 00:10:11.440 --> 00:10:16.240 friends and family that hold me accountable, to the point where a lot of 103 00:10:16.279 --> 00:10:22.120 times it's annoying because listen, we've all been there where we're going to someone 104 00:10:22.480 --> 00:10:26.759 and we want them to be like we right at dawn and yeah, girl, 105 00:10:26.840 --> 00:10:30.240 like you're right and you did nothing wrong, and I see your point, 106 00:10:30.279 --> 00:10:33.200 and let's go one hundred percent. And it used to annoy me until 107 00:10:33.240 --> 00:10:39.039 I got older and I realized it's such a benefit because even if in the 108 00:10:39.120 --> 00:10:41.559 moment, I don't want to see what I did wrong or I can't see, 109 00:10:43.360 --> 00:10:46.159 having someone that I know cares for me say, you know, Ash, 110 00:10:46.279 --> 00:10:50.200 I understand this point, but maybe what you could have done is this, 111 00:10:50.879 --> 00:10:52.480 or what you could have said is this, or you know what, 112 00:10:52.679 --> 00:10:56.960 that was really bad that that person said that, But why did you put 113 00:10:56.000 --> 00:11:00.759 yourself in a position for them to say that or do that when you told 114 00:11:00.799 --> 00:11:03.720 me they did that a month ago? So that means you know what they're 115 00:11:03.759 --> 00:11:07.679 capable of and you kept going back. So no, it's not my fault, 116 00:11:07.720 --> 00:11:13.600 but they put the question now in my head as to wait a minute, 117 00:11:13.759 --> 00:11:18.480 why am I shocked? Why did I put myself back in that situation? 118 00:11:18.720 --> 00:11:22.639 Right? Because I can't control that person, But this is not a 119 00:11:22.639 --> 00:11:28.759 surprise to me, right, So all of those scenarios are things that are 120 00:11:28.879 --> 00:11:33.600 helpful. But if let's say that same scenario I went to friends or family 121 00:11:33.600 --> 00:11:37.679 members and they were like, oh, yeah, you know that person's crazy 122 00:11:37.720 --> 00:11:43.000 and you're one hundred percent right and you know I knew I didn't like them, 123 00:11:43.039 --> 00:11:48.240 and blah blah blah blah blah. I would never have that moment where 124 00:11:48.279 --> 00:11:52.519 I would have to sit and think like, hmm, how did it get 125 00:11:52.559 --> 00:11:56.720 there? Like what happened? What is this scenario? Let me figure out 126 00:11:56.720 --> 00:12:01.840 what this is trying to teach me. I would never have those moments thus 127 00:12:01.960 --> 00:12:07.279 I would never grow right. So again, enablers think that they're helping when 128 00:12:07.320 --> 00:12:13.919 they just blindly support someone. But I would encourage if you don't know you're 129 00:12:13.960 --> 00:12:18.039 an enabler and you're hearing this and you're thinking like, oh wow, maybe 130 00:12:18.080 --> 00:12:20.960 I might be an enabler. The next time someone comes to you with something, 131 00:12:22.320 --> 00:12:26.320 no matter who they are, no matter how close they are, try 132 00:12:26.360 --> 00:12:33.159 to hear the full story. You know, and the persons on the receiving 133 00:12:33.320 --> 00:12:37.120 end, know that those are your real friends. Those are people that really 134 00:12:37.200 --> 00:12:41.679 care about you, right, family that really cares about you, that ask 135 00:12:41.759 --> 00:12:46.080 those questions that hold you accountable. It may seem like your real friends or 136 00:12:46.440 --> 00:12:50.399 your real close family are the ones that just blindly support you and don't ask 137 00:12:50.399 --> 00:12:58.960 any questions and you're always right, But it's actually the opposite. When you 138 00:12:58.080 --> 00:13:05.720 realize that you're in a relationship, friendship, or even a business partnership with 139 00:13:05.919 --> 00:13:11.759 somebody like this, believe that that is who they are. As most of 140 00:13:11.840 --> 00:13:18.600 us know, the ultra wise Maya Angelou once said, when somebody shows you 141 00:13:18.639 --> 00:13:26.000 who they are, believe them. You are the only person that you can 142 00:13:26.080 --> 00:13:31.360 control. And while people may change, and they can change, they have 143 00:13:31.440 --> 00:13:39.600 to want to change, So no amount of love, time, or affection 144 00:13:39.080 --> 00:13:46.320 that you give will make the difference if they do not want to change. 145 00:13:46.480 --> 00:13:54.200 You. See, those who lack good character and lack that foundation from childhood 146 00:13:54.399 --> 00:14:01.080 to build that character will dispose of you. And not think twice and listen. 147 00:14:01.159 --> 00:14:07.960 I'm not speaking of when you've treated somebody very poorly or wrong them, 148 00:14:07.159 --> 00:14:11.720 or cheated or stole from them or alied on them, and they've chosen to 149 00:14:11.720 --> 00:14:16.679 set a boundary by not continuing your relationship. That's completely different. You're on 150 00:14:16.720 --> 00:14:20.039 your own with that, right, because that means you don't have good character. 151 00:14:20.919 --> 00:14:28.080 I'm speaking of someone that you've treated well, that you know, despite 152 00:14:28.120 --> 00:14:35.360 treating them well, they betrayed you. Someone who may have continuously disrespected you. 153 00:14:37.320 --> 00:14:46.080 That that is someone or that is a situation where you have to think 154 00:14:46.120 --> 00:14:50.000 about it and say to yourself, they're showing me all these things? Why 155 00:14:50.039 --> 00:14:56.639 am I not believing what this person is showing me? Let me ask you 156 00:14:56.720 --> 00:15:01.879 this. Have you ever had someone act like you were disposable or maybe treat 157 00:15:01.919 --> 00:15:09.039 you like you were disposable? It hurts, right, but you must remember 158 00:15:09.720 --> 00:15:15.200 whether you have gone through a situation like that, are currently going through a 159 00:15:15.240 --> 00:15:18.519 situation like that, or maybe you will go through a situation like that. 160 00:15:20.759 --> 00:15:28.240 If someone can just walk away after betraying you, they never truly valued you. 161 00:15:31.200 --> 00:15:37.000 And that goes for a friendship, a romantic relationship, and even a 162 00:15:37.039 --> 00:15:43.240 business relationship. If a company your work, you've worked for for twenty five 163 00:15:43.320 --> 00:15:48.399 years, that you've you know, never taken a sick day, and you 164 00:15:48.480 --> 00:15:52.320 always worked over time, and you always showed up, and you always made 165 00:15:52.320 --> 00:15:58.279 sure you took extra shifts or whatever the case may be, and they now 166 00:15:58.360 --> 00:16:06.440 have to make and you're the first person that they go to fire. But 167 00:16:06.519 --> 00:16:10.759 persons that just came in that maybe go to lunch with them all the time, 168 00:16:10.799 --> 00:16:14.080 but don't really do much work, but they're well liked in the office, 169 00:16:14.399 --> 00:16:22.120 they get to keep their job. They never truly valued you, right, 170 00:16:22.240 --> 00:16:26.879 And that's a tough lesson to learn, but it's something that you have 171 00:16:26.000 --> 00:16:30.080 to learn and it teaches you. Okay, maybe in my next job, 172 00:16:30.159 --> 00:16:37.320 I'm not going to overextend myself so much because when the ball drops, a 173 00:16:37.399 --> 00:16:40.840 company is going to do what they have to do. In my next relationship, 174 00:16:41.200 --> 00:16:44.480 I'm not going to go out of my way so much for somebody that's 175 00:16:44.519 --> 00:16:48.399 continuously disrespecting me under the guise of if I just show them a little more 176 00:16:48.519 --> 00:16:52.440 love, they'll know that they're safe. They'll know that they're safe here. 177 00:16:53.399 --> 00:16:56.399 If I just do a little more, if I just try to talk to 178 00:16:56.440 --> 00:17:00.000 them in a certain way, I can help with their actions to things. 179 00:17:00.559 --> 00:17:07.599 It won't work because nothing you will do, nothing you can do, will 180 00:17:07.720 --> 00:17:15.119 change who that person is. If they do not want to change, so, 181 00:17:15.720 --> 00:17:22.880 they can't love you ultimately. If they don't love themselves, you know, 182 00:17:22.039 --> 00:17:26.480 it's like trying to pour from an empty cup. It just doesn't work. 183 00:17:26.519 --> 00:17:34.200 They can't pour anything into you if they don't feel that themselves love yourself 184 00:17:34.359 --> 00:17:41.720 enough to walk away from the things or the people that make you feel like 185 00:17:41.759 --> 00:17:48.240 an afterthought. You know, if someone can erase you from their life like 186 00:17:48.400 --> 00:17:56.039 yesterday's news, it's not your love that they're missing, it's their own capacity 187 00:17:56.079 --> 00:18:03.359 to love, right, And you don't wish bad on anybody like that, 188 00:18:03.519 --> 00:18:07.880 because their punishment is that they are who they are. If somebody has it 189 00:18:08.039 --> 00:18:15.119 in them to be so hurtful to another person that they claim to have love 190 00:18:15.200 --> 00:18:22.160 that they claim to have, you know, regard for what type of person 191 00:18:22.240 --> 00:18:26.000 do you have to be to have the ability to do that, and you 192 00:18:26.039 --> 00:18:30.640 know, betrayal in that way is hard. You know, it's something that 193 00:18:32.720 --> 00:18:37.720 I think rattles our foundation, especially of our trust. But amidst all of 194 00:18:37.759 --> 00:18:41.599 that, there's a lesson in it, right, because we don't do losses, 195 00:18:41.720 --> 00:18:48.240 only lessons. I know that's a jay Z lyric, but yeah, 196 00:18:48.279 --> 00:18:53.839 our self worth isn't tied to someone else's treatment of us. So if they 197 00:18:53.880 --> 00:19:00.359 can erase you in their mind without a second thought, again, it's not 198 00:19:00.599 --> 00:19:10.000 your love that they lack, it's their inability to appreciate your worth. Right, 199 00:19:10.720 --> 00:19:14.880 if someone can pretend you do not exist, ignore you, et cetera, 200 00:19:15.680 --> 00:19:22.119 you know, have no remorse. It's not you, it's their inability 201 00:19:22.160 --> 00:19:30.880 to recognize your value. And that's something you have to remember, especially if 202 00:19:30.920 --> 00:19:34.519 you are a kind person, especially if you are someone that you know thinks 203 00:19:34.559 --> 00:19:41.839 that your kindness or your good will or your good nature you know, will 204 00:19:41.920 --> 00:19:45.079 just rub off on this person or they will just all of a sudden appreciate 205 00:19:45.160 --> 00:19:52.039 it. They won't until they get to that place and figure out what their 206 00:19:52.160 --> 00:19:56.640 issues are. It's not going to be appreciated. If anything, you're probably 207 00:19:56.680 --> 00:20:03.880 going to be resented for it. So by now, you may be thinking 208 00:20:03.920 --> 00:20:10.039 to yourself, what are some red flags that may indicate someone has poor character? 209 00:20:11.200 --> 00:20:17.039 Well, my dear, there are several. Some are more obvious than 210 00:20:17.079 --> 00:20:22.480 others. And to be honest, listing all of the red flags that I 211 00:20:22.559 --> 00:20:27.599 think are possible would make this episode about five hours long, so we're not 212 00:20:27.640 --> 00:20:33.640 gonna do that. But I will say this. One that I think is 213 00:20:33.680 --> 00:20:41.279 a Trinidad carnival of red flags all by itself is when someone says I've got 214 00:20:41.400 --> 00:20:48.759 nothing to offer you or you're too good for me. If somebody says one 215 00:20:48.799 --> 00:20:53.720 of those two things, believe them. It is not carnival. Okay, 216 00:20:55.240 --> 00:21:02.519 there's no Marchelle, there's no Bungee. They're not perform Do not turn into 217 00:21:02.559 --> 00:21:07.079 an avenger and try to save the day. It is not an invitation to 218 00:21:07.200 --> 00:21:18.200 be their savior. It is a billboard time square sign sized red flag to 219 00:21:18.240 --> 00:21:26.160 remove yourself from the situation. And I know, I know, trust me. 220 00:21:26.839 --> 00:21:30.039 You may be well intentioned. We have all been there at some point 221 00:21:30.039 --> 00:21:37.920 in time, but in the long run, your intentions will not matter to 222 00:21:38.079 --> 00:21:45.519 someone whose character is flawed. It is twenty twenty three, about to be 223 00:21:45.599 --> 00:21:55.759 twenty twenty four. The LTDT community. Let's make a deal in twenty twenty 224 00:21:55.799 --> 00:22:03.519 four and beyond. Let's invest in relationship where reciprocity is a currency, not 225 00:22:03.720 --> 00:22:12.640 relationships that require constant self sacrifice, right, because stress causes what wrinkles and 226 00:22:12.960 --> 00:22:22.640 m M, we're not having that. Friendships, relationships, partnerships, cruise 227 00:22:22.640 --> 00:22:29.400 ships, any ship should never be one sided. And think about it like 228 00:22:29.440 --> 00:22:33.119 this. You know, I love my analogies. What happens when you go 229 00:22:33.200 --> 00:22:38.519 on a seesaw with somebody with which you usually do in order for it to 230 00:22:38.559 --> 00:22:42.319 be a seesaw? Right? What happens when you go on a seesaw with 231 00:22:42.400 --> 00:22:49.240 someone and suddenly they hop off. You go flying in the air, and 232 00:22:49.359 --> 00:22:52.599 while you're in the air, you're going to be looking down, which would 233 00:22:52.640 --> 00:22:56.440 probably seem like slow motion thinking, oh my gosh, I don't know how 234 00:22:56.480 --> 00:23:07.440 I'm going to land. Us an't see if. Ultimately, if you haven't 235 00:23:07.480 --> 00:23:11.759 been in any of these situations, you likely will encounter at least one of 236 00:23:11.799 --> 00:23:18.359 these situations at some point in your life. And it's important to remember this. 237 00:23:19.119 --> 00:23:26.880 If somebody betrays you or disrespects you, and you're even more hurt because 238 00:23:26.880 --> 00:23:32.000 it seems like they move on like you meant nothing. And at the same 239 00:23:32.079 --> 00:23:37.359 time they're revered, and like we spoke of earlier, they have a crowd 240 00:23:37.400 --> 00:23:41.440 sharing for them based on sometimes the untruth that they likely told, but just 241 00:23:41.519 --> 00:23:47.880 maybe because they have a likable personality, and you might say to yourself, 242 00:23:48.079 --> 00:23:52.319 really, God, like this is so unfair, how are they getting away 243 00:23:52.359 --> 00:23:57.720 with this? Well, I will tell you this, No, I am 244 00:23:57.759 --> 00:24:03.680 not a senior citizen, although sometimes I feel like it, but I have 245 00:24:03.880 --> 00:24:08.960 been on this earth long enough, and one thing I learned, Like our 246 00:24:10.079 --> 00:24:17.400 Caribbean grandparents and parents, like to say God now sleep right, which for 247 00:24:17.480 --> 00:24:23.359 those unfamiliar with the saying, is just a reminder that while justice or vindication 248 00:24:23.559 --> 00:24:30.880 may take a while, it eventually catches up. God doesn't sleep. God 249 00:24:30.960 --> 00:24:37.039 sees all and hears all, and it's a comfort and a reminder as well 250 00:24:38.039 --> 00:24:45.480 for us not to stress about the wrongdoing that someone has done to us. 251 00:24:45.720 --> 00:24:59.359 And it's just important to remember to trust the timing of your life. And 252 00:25:00.920 --> 00:25:03.720 although it may be hard to do in the moment, if you can, 253 00:25:03.119 --> 00:25:08.079 just try to think to yourself, instead of thinking I should say what is 254 00:25:08.640 --> 00:25:14.240 instead of thinking I should say why is this happening to me? Try to 255 00:25:14.359 --> 00:25:19.839 ask God or whatever higher power you pray to, what is this trying to 256 00:25:19.960 --> 00:25:32.640 teach me? Your mother did not endure hours of labor for you to be 257 00:25:32.880 --> 00:25:41.920 undervalued or disrespected. Your mother literally puts her life at risk for you to 258 00:25:41.000 --> 00:25:48.119 be on this earth. So don't let no Why treat you like bread back? 259 00:25:48.680 --> 00:25:57.640 You are ouxtale with extra gravy. H Chase your dreams, chase tequila, 260 00:25:59.440 --> 00:26:06.319 open up an account at Chase Bank. Anything but chasing someone who's made 261 00:26:06.359 --> 00:26:12.200 it clear that they do not value you. Do not chase after those who 262 00:26:12.279 --> 00:26:22.039 ignore you, dodge uncomfortable conversations, and continuously disrespect you. That's nothing worth 263 00:26:22.119 --> 00:26:33.319 chasing. Your worth is immeasurable, and settling for less only diminishes your beautiful 264 00:26:33.440 --> 00:26:41.759 light. With that, I'd like to leave you with one of my favorite 265 00:26:41.799 --> 00:26:51.000 quotes. Don't allow people who dishonor you to define you. Define yourself, 266 00:26:52.160 --> 00:27:00.920 reclaim, nourish, and love yourself. Your ancestors hope you remember who you 267 00:27:02.039 --> 00:27:11.240 are. You are worthy, you have always been well. Guys, we're 268 00:27:11.319 --> 00:27:18.480 winding down the season. This might be the second to last episode, or 269 00:27:18.480 --> 00:27:22.359 maybe we'll have two more left. I'm still not sure, but I'm just 270 00:27:22.440 --> 00:27:26.519 here thinking This can't be the same year we just did five four three two. 271 00:27:26.640 --> 00:27:30.559 Happy New Year, for it can't be. I mean, honestly, 272 00:27:30.680 --> 00:27:37.279 can you believe Christmas is in less than a month? Crazy? Well, 273 00:27:37.400 --> 00:27:42.039 as twenty twenty three comes to an end, I hope you had a lot 274 00:27:42.039 --> 00:27:48.319 of wins, but I also hope you had a good amount of lessons and 275 00:27:48.400 --> 00:27:53.680 support through those lessons. I hope that this podcast helped you through a lot 276 00:27:53.720 --> 00:28:00.880 of those lessons and even maybe some of the wins. And I hope that 277 00:28:00.960 --> 00:28:07.359 you continue to embrace your worth, honor your boundaries, and trust in God's 278 00:28:07.400 --> 00:28:18.000 timing. Remember love yourself enough to recognize when someone's actions don't align with their 279 00:28:18.039 --> 00:28:21.519 words. Character matters.