The Night Shift is a real play D and D video and podcast series for
mature audiences. Content warnings can be found in the episode descriptions Last Time on
the night Shift. I'm just saying, a little steamy pirate romance on the
boat for a few days sounds like a good time. I hear you the
buccaneer in the Babe, I'm picking up with your boots. Maybe next time
I wasn't doing so much fucking opium, Maybe I could. He got lost
in the soul. Oh my god, I can't scrip together gold. My
souls already sold. Swim you trapped in your spell. I wish you well,
then for creatrun your streets. You do better to retreats if you want
it done right, don't huh A night shift. The Corleon Aisles are as
close as this world has to paradise, not quite heaven, but close enough
to cause confusion. You stand aboard the swaying deck of the water worm,
waves crashing beneath you against the cedar planks of the weathered hull. The sun
is shining so brightly that you all find yourselves squinting, trying to make out
the details of the figure waving at you. From the island below. But
by his stature, his purple cloak, and his general disposition, he is
unmistakable. It is, of course Dadic Goresman. He turns, smiles,
and slowly strolls to the open door of his not so humble three story abode.
Palm trees sway in a strong breeze, the salty s air sobering you
almost as much as the sight of a body jumping dark wizard of untold power.
The rope stairs are unfurled, its bottom rungs dangling a couple of feet
above the pier, and behind you you're here? What are he is waiting
for welcome party? Come on, get off my fucking boat, U Jimbo.
I'm very rude of you, said, Am I crazy? Or I
mean I have some sorts of um instinctual thing telling me your eyes just got
significantly better. Your eyes And that was David, right, I could tell
that was David. I knew it. I knew I got a bit cloak.
I knew it. I mean I could see it when we were over
the island that you can't even the way past the horizon listeners at home,
Uh, just leveled up and got better vision. Significantly better vision. He
can see things from like a mile away. Yeah, essentially had relax.
Okay, guy, we're going you know who that is, don't you walk
in there? That's the guy. That's the fucking guy, right, that's
the the you know, the one we would deliver the furniture. And how
far away away from the shore it's off. You're like, so this rope
ladder on the side of the ship basically goes down to the pier and you're
these deep water areas are very pressing. Well, okay, Kestral skips the
ladder entirely, jumps into the ocean and swims through a ship ton of seaweeds.
Wow, looking out deftly, she's managed all that, going right through
the swedstegrates in front of me. Because this awesome aura that I'm now unbelievable.
It seems she too, has gained some new I have lost control insirely
and immediate eye spy with my eagle, Kestral doesn't seem phased by the unreal
Wow. Wow, yep, are you seeing this? Yeah? No,
she's like cutting right through the water. We got the seaweed. No,
she's right around, No, I'm right right there. There's a ship ton
of coral in front of me, and I just I'm telling you, it
just dissolves, just dissolves. Okay for the coral though, that's a reef
in this world everywhere, lots of reef zavis reef that. Yeah, yeah,
it doesn't right, goodbye then, Lucius. Oh okay, all right,
backflip off the ship. Sure right, that is a you wanted athletics
track. But I get to choose. You get to choose. Okay,
that is going to be as gonna be a seventeen seventeen Tom. It's a
long drop. Yeah we're talking. But Tom lands kind of like overturned on
his backflip and it helps him little bit. Yeah, I roll into a
park course style. Yeah, he was on Glands sort of on his heels
and rolls immediately backwards a few times and then springs up from a somersault and
dust the gymnast post. I want to hands out, yes, toast,
hands out, But like you know when like Willy Wonka pulls that forward somersault
and he pops up all nimble bimbley, like it has those vibes strangely,
yes, I do. On the pier. Yeah, he's on the pier.
Okay, Castrill takes a ship ton of seaweed and throws it on him.
Oh Jesus Christ, here so you hit the perfect pose and then see
from the cast what the fuck rested agetation coop cleaned it off. I just
climbed down the rope ladder like a normal person, color flexing so hard on
this, Like hell, you know you guys are doing crazy. It's useful,
but you do crazy stuff, all right, Lazi, Just thanks for
the ride, mate, See what would you like need to do? Should
I stay? Should I stay out? What you're gonna You're gonna You're just
gonna have. I don't think anything that's gonna happen. You should probably stay.
Yeah, you should be fine. It doesn't look like Bill was gonna.
And Bill is like, I'm just gonna stay. I'm just gonna because
that looks oh that look that looks like like a lot. So I'm gonna
stay. Mate, you don't want to go talk to the Yeah, well
yes we need you, we need your blade, all right? Yes,
well what if you stay? But he come like reaches around and he grabs
a knife and he's like, you want me to just throw it to you?
I want you to throw it in Davic's neck. Yeah, in the
neck, um to your trademark, Billy kind of you could we do a
thing where like, um, I go in the room last you know,
yeah, then yeah, absolutely come um and then him and Lucia just have
to figure out how to get an eight hundred pound turtle down a ropees wing.
But he's the water. He's not a seed turtle. Tom, Wow,
you're jumps in the water. I can't think of everything. I don't
tell you. I can't even think of most things. What are we doing?
Pinned joining us, Pin stays, I don't need that many mpeces.
Pin stays Bill. Bill will come with you, Pin will be backin winks
winks. All right. M So you step up on this pier and it's
looks like it's newly constructed, very well constructed, and then what stretches out
in front of you is like this very well manicured lawn essentially, and then
a huge I think I described to you last time, but three story sort
of why but like pretty formidable, uh tower fortress um no windows and one
door that is slightly a jar the front door in fact, no windows,
no windows, the front door at all. I hear you, You know
what I mean? I think I prefer the man's ambiance a bit more than
this doesn't seem very welcoming, doesn't like I wanted to break into the man's
I was like, you left the door open. I feel like that's an
invitation to follow him in. I know, and I was funny out the
world works. I almost don't want to at this point, he's still lawn
or he walked down Yeah, yeah, I know he inside the building.
Um, should we talk about this at all? Guys? Um some kind
of strategy before we move forward? All right? Group, group, Okay,
group, I would say, the strategy is your strength. So let's
absolutely. Um do you mean what are we are? We are we coming
to? When I hear it? How dare you say? Okay, let's
let's yeah, we're gonna have to fight him again? Right, believe that
he's gonna pier was about okay exactly? So what did Haslet tell us about
how to defeat the doc Wizard? Well, we need to get him in
he get him bloody down, yeah, down to like you know, his
last breath. But but he can't if we basically, if we kill him,
he's just gonna jump bodies, um perform, So we need ritual.
We know that maybe maybe or do we get maybe if we just go after
his uh medallion, you know whatever, his amulets. Yeah, um,
maybe if we rid him of the amulet, Tom, why don't you get
close to Daddy, put on a costume and seduce him and then dall whoa
the dragon real quick? Seduce him? You know, I'm very confident,
Yeah he does, and have Lady Tarris anymore? I don't, I know
I'm coming. I doubt my ability to sell this to David. I'm willing
to try, but let's maybe have a backup plan just in case ec through
my ruse. I'll start gathering some coconuts and start stuffing my shirts and whatnot,
and we'll uh coconut kind of work from there. Okay, classic coconuts,
find me on the ground and make some assumptions about his preferences. First
of all, well, I mean, Lady Harris was a female, so
I don't know you could be an happy man, you don't. You did
talk about a bucks him halfling earlier, so like I'm kind of channeling that
what's her name not bucks hm halfling? She is a halfling. She is
a female, she's probably pretty muscular. Well, she's probably pretty muscular,
so she could be uh like that, you're getting lost here. I'm gonna
grab some coconuts. But what what what mean? Should we be ready to
fight? Here? I take the court Lean Isles coin that I have in
my backup holding. I take it out and I does it look any different
now that we're in the Corelean Aisles? Looks the same? No, it
does not look any different. Still has Davic engraved on it, so scratched
into it. Uh, guys, this was this was lady Terros's uh ambulet
or her coin that she kept on her with Davik's name on it from the
Corlean Aisles. Kind of what led us here? Maybe we could boggin with
him, perhaps with this coin, show him that we have it and that
we know how she contained in that coin or she We don't know it?
No where I don't believe we lost. Yes, and because this coin was
her way of killed her. Well dump bodies, but no way about making
Davik believe that it's her with Oh we could we could make Davic think we
are her in one of our bodies. Yes, that's what we're supposed to,
what we're doing. Okay, okay, into tom Bombo. You will
take this coin and with the coconuts that you have found. Yes, yes,
we will make Yes, we will. We will go in. We
will go in. We will engage Davic and conversation. Yes, we will
talk about how we defeated Lady Tarros back uh in in uh Hi home,
thank you in Hi home. At some point you will pull the havoc aside,
show him the coin and say it's okay, I jumped bodies, I'm
Lady Tarros. Okay. So in that scenario, yes, I don't think
I need the coconut booths set right. I mean that's fine. I'm down
because I don't think that's probably the least convincing parts of my outfit. So
we get rid of those. I do like the dep I just want to
see you with a coconut knocles, mate, or I mean they do feel
they don't feel great actually quite scratchy um. But but I just I just
crack open a coconut real quick and drink the coconut milk. So I could
try to take David to the side. Or we maybe we do a thing
where it's like then Lady Terrell's jumped into Tom's body and she got to talking
to us, and now we're on your side, and that's where we came
here, was to uh help her out with you. No. No,
you go in deceiving thinking like we're like, we're you think your Tom?
Yeah, we think you're Tom, and you're like, I fooled them all
and brought them to you. I am. I tell you why this is
kind of tricked Davos, because it's already tricked me. I'm confused. Okay,
no, no, yeah, no, let's see it. Okay,
how any ideas on how to get to me and him alone? Maybe maybe
I'll be I think, well we'll be able to figure that out while we're
waiting on refreshments or something. But yeah, I agree, just freestyle plan.
Here's my question though, Once we get him convinced that you're actually Lady
Terris because you have the coin, I'm going to tell him that I must,
then what are we going to do? Is he just gonna say,
all right, the two of you now kill us three and then we I
mean, at some point you're just gonna have to well, you have to
get close enough to him to get his amulet. That's that's what we have
to that's the key. We're we're never going to win engaging him in an
actual battle, and then if we get him actually close to death, he's
just gonna disappear again or something. So you've got to get close enough to
him, have the performance of a lifetime and get the amulet off of him.
And if we have to distract him with a battle with him, thinking
that you're his ally, so be it will attack him, not you.
But you're gonna have to be close enough to him to get the amulet.
Sure, sure, how but somehow this right, they we were started off
not good and then right there in the middle you found it. I think
now we pay attention. Okay, pay attention about right. I'm just okay,
yeah, okay, Nicholas cage on it man. Just like sun is
high in the sky, sounds like time for a nooner. Yeah, let's
go see. Yeah, I mean, in the least we can get some
drinks and some viscils, should we also try and get information about them,
about guilda brag and the prince and how I mean this guy himself. I
almost assume he's going to tell us everything all the monologues. Also, obviously
the key is to get the amulet off of him. And then once we
have the amulet, we don't really know what's going to happen. But if
we have to get him to uh down to you know, his last breath
and then question him or something, or if we just kill him, we
just kill him once he doesn't have the Amulet on him, I don't know.
Yeah, I mean I feel like, you know, I feel like
we put together a pretty good plan here, and now we just kind of
see what happens, assuming that getting the Amulet off of the other is going
don't save our lives. I think you guys put together a pretty good half
a plank that's very good for us. If I get my hands on the
amulet, I will immediately throw it to you if I get it off,
I got it okay. As they are talking, I'm also like taking a
look around the lawn and kind of just observing the overall fortress. Can I
roll some kind of check to see what I see? Thought you were going
to be like crawling through the grass so that you could use this new skill
of yours again. I know this the building, while large, like you
could literally walk all the way around it, probably while they were having that
conversation if you wanted, um, yeah, rolling investigation, check big money.
Oh that was terrible. That was not big money. H seven define
terrible? Seven? Seven? Um okay, yeah seven. You walk all
the way around. I think what you're able to figure out is there is
no like rooftop parapet Like there's no there's no lookout. There's not like a
pool on the roof or okay, you might have gonna get on the roof,
but there it would be very unsafe up there. There's no rails or
anything. Um, there's no windows even on the backside. This is the
only pier on the island. The island itself not that big. It basically
contains the building and not much more. There's a little I mean, this
is an evil last building right, Like he's doing dark wizard shits in here.
That's why there's no windows. So no one, we're just summers here.
I mean, you know, yeah, is it gray the dark is
it? Yes? Yeah? I would say like a dark gray almost black.
Yeah, charcoal gray, yeah, definitely not. It's Key West tribes.
It's got like Panama City, Massachusetts. Yes, the city Massachusetts the
trees anyway. Yeah, he's on the building specific Uh of palm trees and
stuff like that, banana trees. You look so excited. Yes, there
are are there animals on this island. Uh, animal handling check, let's
rolling animal handling ship fun? Interesting fun, that's great. Fourteen, You
about what kind of animal do you want to be on the island? Monkeys?
Banana trees of course, obviously there's a couple of monkeys around. What
kind of don't you check with monkeys? Because I can't think of another one?
Um, and you see some some nanateees as well, floating around the
little t between islands. Okay, nantees and monkeys, m anything else before
we let's just going in. Let's go in. What do we do?
We need to name this operations? Any kind of magical words around? Can
I check? Yes, you totally can by rolling an investigation, which which
you just did this investigation that's like a check. Yeah, it's magical the
door friend, UM, I don't know if I can let you just go
on the whole island. Is there a magic thing? I hear you,
I hear you. Um, I mean maybe there's like kind of like how
owners have invisible pet fences. What do you know? Absolutely not what you're
killing me trying to signal to you to do what he wants. Yeah,
I hear you about the door. Um, but you know if you touch
it and it electric to you. Again, a number of times he's touched
the door. I mean that's pretty good. Odd. Yeah, yeah,
I think I want to roll to see if there's some kind of like invisible
pet fence, magic fence thing. Making sure I heard you, like a
magical marrier or something for the like a pet fence. Yeah, yeah,
like like electric shock collar. I know what you're talking about. Yeah,
to keep you out. Yeah right, just make sure I understand. Yeah,
I just wanted to clarify he doesn't have like a little Yorky that he's
scared is gonna run unto the ocean or I mean, we don't know.
That's a possibility. It's a possibility. I just want to make sure I
understood what that Maybe sheds something that's designed to keep something else in, not
keep us out. That would be dangerous. Yeah. Another one. It
was me the entire time. Yeah, and she's talking. Oh my god,
it was rainbow. Yeah, you're good at it, dude. Shit
thirteen Yeah, tee. We were all like, Oh, it was just
one of those things for me and team like, oh, that's not okay,
thirteen. I think with a thirteen what you get is there's definitely a
There's no fence or anything like that. It's not like if you cross ever
a certain porter portion of the lawn you're gonna get electrocuted or anything like that.
Um, but there is definitely a very strong, uh, magical aura
coming out of the building. Sort of Yeah, even if the door were
closed, you can kind of see it through the walls, that sort of
thing. Is there is there a chance since I'm a warlock, I could
I could have a greater sense of if there's anything like that there if I
wrote like an investigation or our kind of check, or would if she like
talked to you and told you the thing? And yeah, absolute kestro,
could you sense anything? Ailius? Actually I did, and and there's some
kind of magical aura that's coming from the building. I hated here to be
fair, you put this into the World's a Dark Wizard. Yeah, yeah,
I did this to myself. Am I standing by any sand or is
it because I'm on the lawn. Now let's say you're standing by a ton
of sand just because I'm curious. Well, I'm just gonna scoop up a
handful of sand and put in a little pot, little pocket sand. I
like that. I like that. That's a nine plus four, right,
pretty girl? All right? M yeah, I think we're the thirteen,
same thing, same kind of story. I mean, you could tell it.
There's lots of mett. Once you sort of focus on it, you
can tell it's a lot of magic imanating from this building, but no sense
of specifics. Let's just go in, Mite. He left the door open
for a reason. He's expecting us lead the way, Timbo. All right,
I go ahead and push the door open and say Daddy's so ah.
Yeah, established dominance, even though you've walked into a rather large ante chamber
that has bricks and higher up stone. The weird thing is when you shout
Daddy's home, there's no echo. You just say it and it. He
doesn't reverberate back to your rooms. Very sound proved. That's odd. I
don't even hear Nikko with my own voice. Might have a bit of an
impressive feeling just standing in this room right now. This might be something other
than just the three storied tower here, did y'all feel any magic? Earlier?
There was an davic he Ye, what you see in front of you
is a brick lined sort of anti chamber or fourier or fourier if you're feeling
particularly fancy. Um, there's one door right in front of you. Um.
And then at the top it's sort of stone lined, but it's uh,
sort of arched at the top domed ceiling, so larger room than you
would expect. And the minute the four of you come in you turn around
him. Bill is like like trying, he's like trying to work up the
courage to like take a step in and in his face, Oh how convenient.
And immediately the candles that were on the walls snuff out and it's completely
dark. Lindsay, I already know you have to Arkisian need to say?
And my eagle eyes and you've got I'm assuming helps you here. I don't
remember if it does. Indeed, you basically have Darkisian now right? Basically
no, basically is it in dim light or dark light? Dim? It
is dim? I would say, not quite. You could see maybe a
little bit better, but Catro's going on, where is everyone? What do
I see? You see the same thing you saw before. Um, but
one of the candles there were probably twelve lit when you walked in. One
of the candles ignites again. It's right by the doorway, right above the
doorway, in fact, and you hear you have entered the Getaway Chamber.
I'm happy to be your host, but you must follow instructions. There's no
there is a way to solve every room, but if you attempt to break
it, I'll break you. Welcome to the Getaway Chamber. And the door
just slides open. And now a word from our sponsors who wants to pay
Wars? I fuck up? Yeah no, I think I think we're doing
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Little Wars actually where I got the sweet DND sleep thing here. Didn't notice
that your character sheets are in the po Yeah? Yeah, finally, finally
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My brother is actually really big into random tabletop games, and I found a
couple of new ones from him, like what is it the Trail at Balder's
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little while to set up, but boys are worth it, really a good
payoff. And then a couple of my other friends are really into painting those
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go and get some. That's cool, we should get some miniatures for us
and we can have them on the table. Like It's a great idea about
a Blood Bowl season two booklet, because Blood bowls incredible, and actually Little
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in general, Little Wars has an amazing community, not not just Blood Bowl.
I mean the staff there is also super helpful whenever you walk in,
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for being a sponsor of the Night Shift who thanks a Little Wars Love You
welcome the Aron House Cookball turn them on up necks. We have the night
Shift perennial losers. You know, their legs have gotten stronger, their hearts
have grown three times the size, and they appear to be okay. Well,
let's take a little break, ladies and gentle bad and we'll be back
in five. Yeah, we feeled a little stronger since the last time.
We're leveled up even though it's been a little while. Wow, wow,
hey Bill, great job out there, man, you really well. I
know you didn't get on base today, but your effort was astounding. Great
job Bill. People kept telling me that I was, I was, I
was never gonna get to third base, and I um, I didn't know.
You didn't effort? How did you miss that ball? I can't get
right to you, I mean, right, gee, I might as well
use you as the ball next. To be fair, I'm about the size
of the ball and you kicked it right next time you climb up on attilius
as is that legal? We look in the rule. Just pour me a
drink, okay, whatever, Well, I'm so angry right now. My
good friends over at rally Cap took the liberty of brewing us a beer named
after something that will never truly understand, and that is Victory Formation. And
there's some assessment to be some sort of runic symbols of some sort from this
can. Well. Yes, uh, the good news is a hazy i
PA eight percent alcohol by a volume. Victory Formation is very tasty, even
though we'll never really understand what it's like. Hey, it's a fifteen to
zero okay, y'all, let's get free. They still have a chance,
for sure. It's a perfect sports brew. Yes, yeah, quench the
first I reckon. When I crank out, my dingers are can just trot
around the base path and watch it with the dingers. This is a family
sport. We don't want to fucking love American football. I get it.
It's like I can read the room, just football man. Fuck. Yeah,
this is actually great. Something happened. It's all bumpa over there.
Yeah, delicious beer. Pelican Craft Brands distributes this throughout the Greater Louisiana area.
Always a fan of bringing delicious craft beer to the people. To take
notes of Citrus. It's quite delicious. Your palate very astute. Over there.
She worked on her kickball skills like she's been working on her beer.
Tom's fault. He missed the ball. Missed the ball. You know the
game works. Why would on the field back on the field? Let Oh
what does that mean? It will break us? That was creepy. Hmm.
All right, so I guess we have to go this way, right,
we're obviously being let I feel like we're already kind of pot committed at
this. This is bullshit. Just come out. Okay, I don't want
to do any stupid riddles. Uh, timbo, are you going to lead
the way here? Of course I will, mate. There's a candle it
I can see just fine. I'm gonna homp on jump on my back to
it is dim light. You can now see just fine. Okay. You
walk through that door, yeah again? This time instead of slamming, it
just sort of and closes behind you. Um, what you've walked into is
uh call it like a sitting room. Right. There's like a couple of
couches and chairs, and there's a chandelier filled with candles above you. And
the minute that door closes and the lock slides in your ears or or in
your head, it's hard to tell. You hear an extremely high pitched noise,
just like a wine. If you've ever had tenitis or something. Yeah,
it doesn't hurt, sup, It's like annoying and there and then it
reaches the point of hurting and and it goes back. Now what it was
that? I don't like that sound at all. Hi, welcome to the
first room in the getaway chamber. Oh, I hate you, I hate
you. Miss minutes, good luck, thank thank you. Okay, this
is guys, it's like room, What do we what do we need to
do? What else is in the room? Is there anything couches, tables?
No? Is there another door or no? Nothing? Right now,
there's no door. Did that high pitched noise seemed to be coming from anywhere?
I want to Was it inside or outside of the room? It was?
It was hard to tell if if it was inside the room or if
it was just inside your head. Definitely couldn't tell if it was coming from
somewhere else. Um, I wouldn't do an aricon of check on the couches
and chairs? Okay? Do it? Ah? That is a sorry this
I should have this ready to go. Um that is a fifteen. Okay,
So with a fifteen, Um, I think as soon as you start
looking at these couches and chairs, you realize something's a little off. Not
about the couches and the chairs, you just that high pitched noise. It
got into your head. It wormed its way into your brain a little bit.
So what I want you to do is roll one, die six and
tell about the number is oh boy four? Nope, roll a different one.
Cry hey three. I'm going to hand you a card to read it.
No one else can read it, and you have to follow the instructions
immediately. Okay, okay, everyone else, go ahead and roll it one
day six. I don't like this in order, please chuck first six one
two, good luck two for tembo wow again. You must follow the instructions
immediately. Oh starting now, Well, I don't know what to tell you
all about these chairs and castes over as a goddamn thing, trying to see
what's going on? What are you saying? What are y'all talking about?
I was trying to check these here castes, but there's some sort of magic
in this here room. But I don't know exactly what the magic is.
Why is your voice so deep? Mate? I don't know what you're talking
about. Man, I'm just here in these cushions or else we all become
some pin cushions? Um? Okay, uh why, I don't know that
was a good one, timbo Um. I take out my dagger and I
just start carving open the cushion. What are you doing? I'll take out
my dagger and I'll start carving cushions too. What ba dash to Bambo?
What are you doing? I'm following Kesher's lead? But what why does everything
you say start with a bee. Hey, all right, hey Chuck,
you can ignore yours now, okay, Um Chuck, you feel bad you
didn't realize it, um ottilious, but that that high pitched noise, it
was still in your head. You've just gotten used to it, and finally
it sort of shuts off and you can feel like a headache go away,
essentially subsides like it's like unclenching your jaw after several hours. Castle, are
you seeing anything in these here pillows? Yeah? You guys cut up these
pillows and there's there's lots of goose down feathers. No, it's quality.
No, this is terrible. Have y'all ever played duck duck? Gray guns?
And my headache is now unbearable? Ah, it seems to me you're
making a lot of rhymes here, yea Castle, you feel sort of your
jaw and clanching your head ache? Tom, why are you speaking of that
stupid John Wayne accident? What John Wayne accident? He was talking about?
I didn't cowboy timbos, I don't fully understand what, just don't know this
in my ear? Is this gone? Okay? My ringing's gone to gone?
Why I'm still asking questions so why did y'all start cutting the pillows?
I got to feel bad about that. Now you were really nice. He
wasn't before. I don't know. I'm just really angry, un welcome and
good Hello gladows. You did great. However, that was a little fast.
That was easy mode. How about we go media? How about shame
rumor? Do we get to go to another room? Oh we'll do it
here. Okay, But the cushions, But the cushions. Everybody roll one
twenty a seventeen for Timbo, seventeen for Tillius, fifteen six more these?
Oh god, only two of you, Kestrel and Tom Bombo. Feel that
that noise in your head again? Oh fuck, it's back, God damn
bringing in my ears heite. I don't hear it, man, it's just
you don't have it. Just I don't reckon h dinging in in in my
ear holes. Look, we just gotta figure this out before this becomes a
bigger problem. Already, do something to help us figure this out. Um,
I mean surely, Look, we don't have to play it. There's
gonna be some way out of here, maybe, right, Yeah, we
shouldn't have to play this game. There has to be another way all right?
Now, why are you both agreeing with each other like this? Son
of a bitch? Tilias, help me look around here a little bit,
maybe in the wall, hands help him view things? Is it is?
Are you playing the repeater? Um? Let's all I say, We're close.
Yeah, I wouldn't do he perception check on their a bookcase or anything
adorning the walls. Let's say, yeah, I want to see where this
goes? Yes, is there any kind of shelf paraphernalia that is on the
paraphrasing everything? He says, yeah, gosh, that's good enough. Eighteen
as I'm looking on the wall or like for any secret little like spots.
Yeah, you look through and oh, so weirdly you find a book called
Attilius the first, Oh for real thru you Attilius, come check this out?
The fuck is this? Says Attilius, the first one here? M
hmm, I've never seen this before. Maybe written by one of my ancestors.
What what Attilius are you? I am the haunted. I go by
no number. No, no, no, that's not a number. If
he's the first, surely you fall somewhere in there. I'm not a number.
I am a free dragon. Board a bittilis. Does he find everything
funny? Yes, everything is amusing. Keep asking me these things that I
can't help a laugh, it's it's it's wild. He's chuckling. God,
everything so humorous, humorous? That a bone joke. I don't think I
have any bones problem right now, but I do need to get this ringing
taken. Has he taken turtle joke? Drug use this time? This time?
Yes? Not this time. He's just high on life, Timbo.
If you found anything, Kestrel's your ringing still going on? Oh no,
I'm good. You're good, Jimbo, you're good. Questions by asking all
these questions, question, what are you talking about? I'm just a Are
you how are you feeling? Are you feeling? No? King, I
feel fine, of course you feel fine. You just got all that HB.
You probably feel wonderful. Oh is he asking a question and then answering
it himself? Um, God, damn, oh no, No, that's
not what's going on exactly. I mean I would tell you, but every
time I go to say it, it's just a stream. You just can't
shut up saying whatever you think. No, it's no, yeah, no,
um obvious. He just has to keep talking. Figure out what he's
like doing all these things? Are you an opposite? I cannot get enough
of you right out. Every time you say something, you're laughing at it.
Ask you something, and you something. That's the person on your side
of the table. Fuck. I'm sorry, Taylor's I really do think you're
funny. I would have it. I knew I was humorous, but I
think he was. Getaway Chamber. I hate this room in your face.
The I take feathers and plug them in my ears so I don't have to
listen to that voice again. Whoa, and I take feathers and put them
in my ears. Okay, we all take feathers and the bookcase just recedes
into the floor, and behind it is an open hallway. I mean yeah,
I mean look, guys, I know I didn't figure that out,
but my instincts, I mean, the book gates give something I hate.
There we go, Um, Timbo, you want to lead the way,
absolutely all I do. Hop on Attilius's back. Come on, come on,
Tom, alright, I proceed down the hallway. You proceed down a
long brick hallway, sort of longer than it seems like it should be.
Like you feel like you walk I don't know, maybe one hundred feet before
you actually hit a single room or a single door. Um, and then
you emerge into what is a like a grand dining room. There's um thirty
doors all the way around the exterior wall and they're numbered one through thirty.
On the table sits a feast of kind of epic proportions. There's there's everything
you can imagine. I literally grabbed Tom by the shirt before he can run,
and I'm kind of like exactly she's lifted me off the ground at this
point and cartoonishly running in place a little scrums. Incredible. I am famished.
Lucious food sucked behind you. The hallway it turns into a wall and
you hear you even to the getaway chamber. Room number two, congratulations on
your swift victory. And room number one. Are you feeling Peckish's quite very
hungry. Always I am two things, but only once you have to guess
me, or you're a dunce. I'm not a vegetable or a meat but
ripened right, I am quite sweet and two things, but only once.
If you don't guess me, you're dunce. Not a vegetable or meat,
but ripened right, I am quite sweet wine ripened right, quite sweet?
Guys, I think it's a riddle my by author. He's just in h
two things, but only once. I guess we're dunce. That's kind of
a throway line. Not a ventual means ripe and rock quiet. See it
could be a grape. Are there grapes on the table. There are grapes
on the table. There's also wine on the table. I was thinking,
because wine is definitely not a vegetable or meat. But it's both juice.
But I know, yes, but then it's right like apple and apple juice
at that point also apply. Yeah, but like there's no like, you
can't be wine. Oh you could be cider and apple juice. Yeah,
true, you could two things, but only once. There's something there's something
like not like an egg, but maybe something along those lines of like I
can what can kind of feed you in multiple different states? Water? Ice?
There's both water and ice on the table. Ripened, ripened, ripened
would not go with that. Man. Yeah, I like eggs, but
but ripened and sweet doesn't work now and then and raisins are sweet love,
I don't know there raisins on the table I'll just go grab some raisins real
quick and we can keep talking. It's probably m well, what is on
the table? Can we take a look at the table? Two things but
only once? What is the but only once? Mean? I think like
once you do something to it then it can never be that other again,
So water's average because you could refreeze water. Yeah, it's just something that
you would cut peel. I could be wrong there. And two things tomatoes
only once. Well with the second tomatoes, I don't know, not invention.
No, it is a fruit, and there are a lot of debate
over tomatoes. Which one is. Yeah, well, yeah, something like
would go from like sour or sweet or like something that would like it's kind
of blended first, but once it ripens, like the taste chaine to taste
a lot of change. Yeah, I mean, but the plantains a lot
of fruits, both straw and berries, all grapes will and it's develop their
sugars at the end. There's something like it's like there's something some sort of
like perfect like yeah, hi, looks like you're struggling with room too.
Do you need the riddle? But yeah, again, I am two things
but only once. You have to guess me or you're a dunce. I'm
not a vegetable or a meat, but ripe and right, I am quite
sweet. Remember you have one hint you may use. Okay, what other
foods are on this table? Just tell us run down the foods. There
are so many foods I couldn't possibly list them. And it feels like every
time you circle the table you're finding more stuff. Okay, okay, bitch
magic. So we do have a hint. Once ripened, I am quite
sweet. Do we think the dunce line is? I feel like maybe we're
concentrating tore. They just wanted to run mom, I'm still landing there.
I just wanted to pose it to the group, wanted it to run.
Good call. I mean on two things, but only once. But like,
I'm not a vegetable or meat, so like that's that's what I'm wondering.
Fruit, Like it's either a fruit or bread. But you can't be
like you can't have ripe bread. How did that become sweet banana bread?
I was kind of thinking, like I was. I was kind of thinking
banana as well, but I just it was great banana bread. Thirteen Because
when bananas become really ripe. They get put into banana breadana bread. You
can't take it back, to take it back like it's only once you're making
a band of bread. You're not getting a banana again. That's a good
point. Well, you got down the sort of agricultural issues here. Is
it a food? Is it food? Maybe Tom's our pet? Oh?
Okay, unnecessary? Okay, focus your energy, morse on solution orients clever
energy to find our solar. I'm okay, are we redound? As for
hinting? Guys? Ripened? Right? I guess is there a wrong way
to ripen something? Are we like? Is there's are we trying to are
we trying to write? Is this something that people are giving the bed?
Is he really that clever? He is not? I think I think I'm
think I'm focusing on the ripened. Okay, do you want to do the
hindo? Let's do the Yeah, it can't be well, we probably Yeah,
they're on the table you hey, anything che he's gonna says on the
table right cigarettes tobacco. They starts tobacco. Okay, you're gonna pick something
up. You're gonna pick something up. We're gonna be a dunce. I
mean, I don't know consequences. I don't want to be a dunce,
to be clear. That could be could be, that could be like a
little classic evil wizard understatement. And no, you're a dunce and here's an
infernal demon. I don't. Let's just if we're gonna touch something on the
table, I would vote maybe drink some wine then at least get Okay,
no you kind of hi No, I would say we take the hint before
we touch anything on the time. All right, damn robot lady, root
lady. Hi, seems like you're having some trouble. Would you like to
use your hands? One? Yeah, that's a touch stone for yes?
Yeah, yes, great, happy to help. So, um, what
is two of one? Thing called a par I hate everything? It was
word play. We should have known it. It was always it's always word
for it. It's always a pun I hate everything. Um, okay,
Castrol takes up, walks over and grabs a pair. Yeah. As as
soon as you pick up the pair, what pick it up? Throws it
at the wall and throw it up the wall? Why not? Okay?
That's fun? Uh? What else would you like to do? I guess
I'll grab a pair as well. Yeah, yeah, I'll grab a pair
and I'll bite it. Yeah, I'll bite it it. I'll eat the
damn. Yeah, I'm gonna follow you all go pa, bide in the
parents, and I got a pair of dse for you. It's progressively.
Do you have an inspiration? Dies not with me currently. I think I
may like I think I do in my base at home. I'm not sure,
but yeah, I go ahead and touch whatever. All right. When
the last of you picks up the last pair, you can you see that
there's a little key beneath that last pair. Is there a number by the
pair? Uh? There's not. But when you pick up the key,
you hear, great job, you solved it. But with only a little
help. It's kind of a lot. But when my father was thirty one,
I was eight. Now he's twice as old as me. My age
is my door. Oh math, y'all have this one. My brain will
lock up. Thirty one I was eight, he's twice. It's place is
old. Oh no, I you have an idea. No, I'm not
good at math. Yeah, it's not gonna be math. Right, there's
no trying to figure it out. There's a riddle. This is a riddle,
it's not a math problem. Sounds like math to me. Well,
I mean when my father was thirty one, I was eight, robot lady,
could you repeat it? Sure? When my father was thirty one,
I was eight. Now he's twice as old as me. My age is
my door, My age is my door. Twice as old as her he
was thirty one, but we don't know how much time hath Oh wait,
okay, age is so it's one th thirty's killing me? Now he's twice
as old as me. M um, oh it is math. Yeah,
it's always a ready. Um. So they're twenty three years apart. Uh
is that what it is? So if she's fIF fifteen, yeah, okay,
yeah so uh so door number then okay, so she's fifteen, now
he's twice as old as me. Like, no, no, no,
no, she's twenty three, she's twenty three, twenty three years apart.
Well, but it's she's twice as old, so twenty yes, no,
I know what I'm saying. Okay, So he plays fifteen is twenty three
if thirty one plus fifteen is forty six, So she's twenty three, right,
forty six and twenty three works in fifteen years. Right, So then
she's twenty three years old, so they age. Is the door door twenty
three? Right? He was thirty one twos eight, if she's twenty three,
twenty three years, separate them. He's forty six, Yes, that's
twenty three and forty six half six, we got twenty three. Yes,
with the key, and I give it a little jiggle, jiggle thinking with
the key, with the key. Okay, it doesn't fold, I hope,
but it doesn't fold. Yeah, I hope it doesn't fold. O,
No, I got you all um, Yeah, you don't get this
is gonna make so much sense, like nine months passes. Yeah, it's
actually from a Louis throw in. You throw great documentary on if you're a
huge nerd like man. Yea. So it is jingle jingle though, is
it really? Yeah? Because it's loose changes your poet, my money don't
jingle jingle because it's not changed. It folds because it's not a bills right
now, you're right, all right, let's move all right, dollar bills.
I don't carry coins. You know what I carry? It does fold
you turn the key in the folds down again. It's magic. He can
do whatever we want I mean, the world is opened it. Let's do
it about I'll put it in my notes door fold, remember that jingle door
fold. It is funny. He didn't realize it was a math question,
but he is the one that kind of figured it out. No one who
can do math, you realize I wasn't going to do it. To do
it my pen not any different than normal. But that's like a content I
never really thought about before. Right, is like somebody being three times your
age and then you go the same amount of time and they're only double your
age and only for one year. Yeah, it's weird. That's how math
works. Know what I'm saying. I don't under I do not understand that.
Like my brain. I'm a writer, not a Well, hey,
here's the good idea. You can start writing during the session. What do
you think of that solid burn? Next time on night shift thirteen? Damage?
So yeah, let's say you turn all the way around and just lop
this one's head off, Yeah, into the ground. Body sort of collapses
over over the head in fact um, what else? How cool do I
look doing that? Team? Fucking badass? Dude, you gutted one and
then chopped the head off the other. While spinning, then yeah, m hm