WEBVTT 1 00:00:01.280 --> 00:00:19.559 And energy, cancel so high ecstasyssage cansage can not sorry andenogy? What's up? 2 00:00:19.600 --> 00:00:23.320 Positive bitches? How are we doing today? If you're hearing this episode, 3 00:00:23.480 --> 00:00:26.760 then you are meant to be here. So keep listening on that Bitch's 4 00:00:26.800 --> 00:00:31.199 Positive Podcast. Sometimes we will laugh. Other times, Baby Girl, we're 5 00:00:31.239 --> 00:00:36.479 gonna cry, but we will always walk away feeling our most empowered positive bitch 6 00:00:36.719 --> 00:00:42.039 self that is Babe in true connection with herself. Come on now, on 7 00:00:42.240 --> 00:00:46.560 this podcast, we unbecome who we are not so we can fully step into 8 00:00:46.799 --> 00:00:52.000 exactly who we came here to be. Can I get an amen? Amen? 9 00:00:52.520 --> 00:00:56.159 Today? We are going to continuously because we've talked about it before, 10 00:00:56.719 --> 00:01:02.320 dive into hookup culture. Now, I've talked about the energetic side effects of 11 00:01:02.600 --> 00:01:07.040 energetic transference when it comes to hookup culture. So if you do want to 12 00:01:07.120 --> 00:01:11.079 learn more about that, I will link that episode In the show notes. 13 00:01:11.400 --> 00:01:17.000 We're going to talk about more of the three D effect of how hookup culture 14 00:01:17.079 --> 00:01:21.599 can really block us from opening the doors that we want to enter through. 15 00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:26.519 We're also going to discuss a recent study that came out by Morgan Stanley that 16 00:01:26.640 --> 00:01:30.159 said, by twenty thirty, forty five percent of women twenty five to forty 17 00:01:30.239 --> 00:01:34.079 four will be single and childless. What does this mean for us? Is 18 00:01:34.120 --> 00:01:38.799 it even true? Where are they getting this information? And so much more? 19 00:01:40.200 --> 00:01:42.000 But before we get into it, if you're not yet following me on 20 00:01:42.239 --> 00:01:47.840 Instagram at Vibeinwood CC and at that Bitch is Positive, be sure to follow 21 00:01:47.920 --> 00:01:52.239 me there so you can get daily tips and tricks on stepping into your most 22 00:01:52.280 --> 00:01:57.040 magnetic energy and just stay connected with law. If you've not yet ordered your 23 00:01:57.120 --> 00:01:59.799 copy of Show Up as Her, be sure to do that as well. 24 00:02:00.040 --> 00:02:01.920 All the links will be in the show notes, and without further ado, 25 00:02:02.280 --> 00:02:07.439 let's get into today's episode. Yesterday, I was watching a YouTube video about 26 00:02:07.520 --> 00:02:14.840 this guy who said he's been waiting on God for weeks, months, years 27 00:02:15.599 --> 00:02:22.599 to open certain doors for him that he feels have been closed. And when 28 00:02:22.719 --> 00:02:27.919 he said he's been waiting on the Lord to open doors, my physical door 29 00:02:28.120 --> 00:02:35.960 in my room closed itself and I thought, okay, what was that now? 30 00:02:36.759 --> 00:02:42.560 And immediately what downloaded into my body is that? And it's something that's 31 00:02:42.639 --> 00:02:46.879 quite obvious, I think, but for whatever reason, it was reinstated within 32 00:02:46.039 --> 00:02:51.159 me, which was that you have to close And I'm getting goosebumps. Right 33 00:02:51.199 --> 00:02:55.360 now, you have to close the doors that aren't meant for you so you 34 00:02:55.560 --> 00:03:02.680 can walk and enter into the halls that we're designed for you. So many 35 00:03:02.800 --> 00:03:10.520 of us, I believe, continuously engage in hookup culture because it scratches a 36 00:03:10.719 --> 00:03:15.680 three D itch of Well, I don't want to feel alone. Well, 37 00:03:15.759 --> 00:03:19.199 I don't want to have to face the fact that I don't have that many 38 00:03:19.280 --> 00:03:21.919 friends right now. Well, I don't want to have to face the fact 39 00:03:21.960 --> 00:03:23.719 that I don't like where my career is right now. Well, I don't 40 00:03:23.759 --> 00:03:28.159 want to have to face these dark, scary emotions. So what am I 41 00:03:28.319 --> 00:03:32.319 gonna do. I'm gonna shove it down by distracting myself with someone else. 42 00:03:32.439 --> 00:03:38.080 In the three D we are using hookup culture as a way to run from 43 00:03:38.199 --> 00:03:43.240 our darkness. But anything we run from is going to chase us. We 44 00:03:43.560 --> 00:03:47.120 cannot outrun our darkness. It is like a shadow and it will follow you 45 00:03:47.560 --> 00:03:53.319 into every room that you go into. You want to heal your darkness. 46 00:03:53.400 --> 00:03:55.879 You want to bring your darkness into the light. You gotta dance with your 47 00:03:57.000 --> 00:04:00.639 darkness. You have to date your darkness. You gotta look at your darkness 48 00:04:00.680 --> 00:04:04.280 in the face. You cannot run from it. And we've talked about the 49 00:04:04.599 --> 00:04:12.439 energetic side effects of energetic sexual transference that comes with being intimate with random strangers. 50 00:04:13.080 --> 00:04:15.680 When you're intimate with someone, it's like bluing two pieces of paper together 51 00:04:16.199 --> 00:04:20.120 and then trying to rip it apart. Energetically, it gets messy. You 52 00:04:20.319 --> 00:04:24.120 take on some of their trauma, some of their demons, some of their 53 00:04:24.160 --> 00:04:27.399 emotions, and you give up a lot of your energy, and then you 54 00:04:27.519 --> 00:04:30.800 think you're missing them, you're obsessed with them, but really you're missing the 55 00:04:30.040 --> 00:04:35.040 energy you gave up to them. Hook Up culture, to me, is 56 00:04:35.480 --> 00:04:43.160 very much wounded masculine. It's thinking from our ego. And when I see 57 00:04:43.399 --> 00:04:46.800 a lot of us doing with hook up culture is we're making panic decisions. 58 00:04:47.399 --> 00:04:50.279 I can't feel this right now. I have to go talk to Brad. 59 00:04:50.680 --> 00:04:54.720 Oh my god, I don't want to face this feeling of loneliness. Oh 60 00:04:54.800 --> 00:04:57.040 my god, I'm going through a breakup. I just need to go out 61 00:04:57.079 --> 00:04:59.279 there. I need to do this. I need to do that. And 62 00:04:59.439 --> 00:05:05.879 we're delay leading ourselves of our sacral energy. Our sacral energy is sexual energy 63 00:05:06.000 --> 00:05:11.079 and creative energy. Because sexual energy is creative energy. Think about how a 64 00:05:11.199 --> 00:05:15.560 baby is made. There we go. Sexual energy and creative energy both come 65 00:05:15.600 --> 00:05:19.199 from our sacral chakra. Imagine what we could be doing with this energy if 66 00:05:19.240 --> 00:05:26.759 we weren't wasting it on Brad, Tom and Jerry. Imagine we're making panic 67 00:05:26.879 --> 00:05:32.120 decisions from our ego. That isn't serving us. It is not serving us 68 00:05:32.399 --> 00:05:36.839 to be sharing our energy with everyone taking on their trauma, and then we're 69 00:05:38.040 --> 00:05:44.040 still feeling terrible. If you're going out every single week and you're participating in 70 00:05:44.120 --> 00:05:47.639 hookup culture and you're realizing, you know what, I really don't even feel 71 00:05:47.720 --> 00:05:54.839 good, that is just a sign it's time to make a change. One 72 00:05:56.000 --> 00:06:00.759 thought form that I've experienced since my breakup and I have felt in my body 73 00:06:00.839 --> 00:06:05.279 that was from my ego was well, if he's going out, if he's 74 00:06:05.360 --> 00:06:09.120 talking to other people, if he's doing this, why I have to do 75 00:06:09.199 --> 00:06:14.120 it too. And so I was forcing myself to go out every single weekend. 76 00:06:14.160 --> 00:06:17.040 I was forcing myself to have the drink, to go out to the 77 00:06:17.120 --> 00:06:20.439 bar, to go out here, to see more people. And you know 78 00:06:20.600 --> 00:06:24.759 what, there's a reason I didn't have a podcast episode last week. It's 79 00:06:24.759 --> 00:06:29.000 because I got sick because my body was so run down, and I literally 80 00:06:29.040 --> 00:06:33.040 thought to myself. The only way I'll have peace staying in is if I'm 81 00:06:33.160 --> 00:06:36.079 literally sick, because then I know I can't physically go out. And what 82 00:06:36.279 --> 00:06:41.680 happened is my body listened to me, hello, strep throat, and I 83 00:06:41.879 --> 00:06:47.720 stayed in because I got sick. We cannot be living from our ego and 84 00:06:47.920 --> 00:06:59.600 expect to feel fulfilled because your ego, it wants to make itself surface level 85 00:07:00.120 --> 00:07:04.839 happy. It wants to make itself feel safe, but really what it's doing 86 00:07:05.560 --> 00:07:12.680 is focusing on its three D survival and it has no concern for what's actually 87 00:07:12.800 --> 00:07:18.319 good for you. My ego wanted me to feel surface level happiness by go 88 00:07:18.560 --> 00:07:21.199 out, Go see more people, go on more dates, go talk to 89 00:07:21.279 --> 00:07:25.399 more people. My ego was telling me I had to keep doing more and 90 00:07:25.519 --> 00:07:28.480 more and more and more, and my heart was hurting. It's like, 91 00:07:28.680 --> 00:07:31.360 whoa, you were just in a seven year relationship. Maybe you need to 92 00:07:31.519 --> 00:07:36.199 slow down, regardless of what your ex is choosing to do, regardless of 93 00:07:36.279 --> 00:07:40.319 what anyone else is doing. Maybe you need to slow down. But my 94 00:07:40.480 --> 00:07:45.160 ego didn't want that. My ego wanted to rush. It wanted the noise. 95 00:07:45.279 --> 00:07:48.560 It wanted to just be in fog because that's where it was comfortable. 96 00:07:48.920 --> 00:07:53.560 It didn't want to look at what my heart really needed, what my intuition 97 00:07:53.879 --> 00:08:00.199 really needed. I felt myself getting more and more and more deplete, and 98 00:08:00.319 --> 00:08:05.199 I wasn't even engaging in hookup culture. I wasn't being intimate with these people. 99 00:08:05.360 --> 00:08:09.879 But just the act of going out and talking and sharing your energy can 100 00:08:09.000 --> 00:08:16.160 be really depleting. I was wasting my own energy because I was living from 101 00:08:16.279 --> 00:08:20.439 my ego. Is listening to my ego, And if you're out here, 102 00:08:20.319 --> 00:08:26.680 out there, wherever you are, if you're thinking to yourself keyword thinking, 103 00:08:26.279 --> 00:08:28.480 I have to do this, I have to do that, and you're so 104 00:08:28.800 --> 00:08:31.240 tired, you need to take a step back, you need to rein it 105 00:08:31.279 --> 00:08:37.799 back in. I think a lot of the time we are trying to leave 106 00:08:39.120 --> 00:08:43.399 so many doors open because we're afraid to feel alone. We're afraid to face 107 00:08:43.480 --> 00:08:48.039 our feelings. And that's our ego talking. We're trying to have all these 108 00:08:48.559 --> 00:08:52.279 fish on the hook when we need to put the hook down so we can 109 00:08:52.360 --> 00:09:00.679 actually walk in the direction that's going to truly fulfill us. E wanted me 110 00:09:00.799 --> 00:09:03.919 to keep going out, keep distracting myself, but my intuition is saying Cecie. 111 00:09:05.320 --> 00:09:07.960 You want fulfillment, Go talk to God, go to the harbor, 112 00:09:07.080 --> 00:09:11.320 go read a book. You need to stay in. You need to reconnect 113 00:09:11.399 --> 00:09:16.559 with yourself. This external experience that your ego is chasing is not helping you. 114 00:09:16.080 --> 00:09:22.200 It's not doing anything for you. I think when we try to hook 115 00:09:22.240 --> 00:09:28.480 ourselves into hookup culture, and you know what's so interesting hook up culture. 116 00:09:30.320 --> 00:09:35.080 We get hooked by hookup culture and it's almost like we're actually the fish on 117 00:09:35.200 --> 00:09:41.399 hookup culture's hook. It's like hookup culture is actually a living, breathing entity, 118 00:09:41.879 --> 00:09:46.039 and once it hooks us in, we end up getting a world of 119 00:09:46.200 --> 00:09:52.720 pain because we end up falling for the wrong people. We end up exchanging 120 00:09:54.080 --> 00:09:58.399 energy with lower vibrational people, We end up staying in things for too long. 121 00:10:00.000 --> 00:10:01.879 We end up talking to people who don't really value us, and that's 122 00:10:01.919 --> 00:10:05.799 why they're rushing us into the bedroom. You want a man to really want 123 00:10:05.840 --> 00:10:09.559 to pursue you, well, then he won't be rushing you into the bedroom 124 00:10:09.559 --> 00:10:15.919 because he knows we'll have plenty of time to get there. Okay, hookup 125 00:10:15.960 --> 00:10:22.080 culture ends up hooking us, and then we no longer even know how to 126 00:10:22.200 --> 00:10:26.000 use our free will because we get so emotionally entangled with people that we can't 127 00:10:26.080 --> 00:10:33.000 think straight. We waste our energy, we waste our time, We waste 128 00:10:33.519 --> 00:10:37.879 so much, so much emotion on the wrong people too. It's like we're 129 00:10:37.919 --> 00:10:43.480 wasting our heart energy as well. I think that a lot of us are 130 00:10:43.639 --> 00:10:50.720 actually making our life more difficult and we're getting in God's way. We're getting 131 00:10:50.799 --> 00:10:54.679 in God's way. I really do believe it. Like naturally attracts. Like 132 00:10:56.399 --> 00:11:00.320 if you're looking at all the people you're attracting and you're like, this is 133 00:11:00.480 --> 00:11:03.159 terrible, you have to look at your own vibration and say, well, 134 00:11:03.399 --> 00:11:09.919 what am I bringing to the table energetically that might be affording me these results. 135 00:11:09.679 --> 00:11:15.399 A lot of us have forgotten about the principle of cause and effect. 136 00:11:16.320 --> 00:11:22.080 We are not just aimlessly floating in this energetic universe. A lot of what 137 00:11:22.320 --> 00:11:26.440 is happening in our life is happening because we're at cause and we're creating some 138 00:11:26.639 --> 00:11:31.200 sort of effect. If you are going out every single weekend, you're drinking 139 00:11:31.279 --> 00:11:35.120 yourself into a slumber, you are being intimate with everyone and their father, 140 00:11:35.679 --> 00:11:41.240 Well, what kind of energy do you think you're going to attract? Because 141 00:11:41.360 --> 00:11:46.440 those actions holds energy action is thought reinforced. What is thought but energy. 142 00:11:48.080 --> 00:11:52.480 A lot of the time we're using hookup culture as a distraction, but then 143 00:11:52.519 --> 00:11:54.759 the hookup culture ends up hooking us, and then we get in our own 144 00:11:54.840 --> 00:11:58.000 damn way. We get in the way of our divine plan, we get 145 00:11:58.039 --> 00:12:03.840 in the way of our energy, and then we just end up depleting ourselves 146 00:12:03.960 --> 00:12:09.720 of it. I saw someone paraphrase a Bible quote and it was inspired by 147 00:12:09.840 --> 00:12:15.720 Romans six twelve to sixteen, and what they wrote was be wary of hookup 148 00:12:15.759 --> 00:12:20.720 culture. Lust is deceptive, a clouds your judgment and can make you think 149 00:12:20.840 --> 00:12:24.879 someone is for you when really they're a temptation from the enemy. You will 150 00:12:24.960 --> 00:12:28.840 not be able to find your spouse if you're consumed by lust and passion for 151 00:12:28.039 --> 00:12:31.519 people who are not meant for you. I want to take this up a 152 00:12:31.639 --> 00:12:37.840 notch. It's gonna be really hard to be emotionally available if you keep getting 153 00:12:37.919 --> 00:12:43.879 hooked by hookup culture. If you're looking for your life partner, you can't 154 00:12:45.000 --> 00:12:50.639 keep opening the door to people who can't give you that. If you're looking 155 00:12:50.759 --> 00:12:54.559 for your life partner, you can't keep opening the door to people who only 156 00:12:54.639 --> 00:12:58.120 want to bring you into the bedroom. If you are looking for your life 157 00:12:58.200 --> 00:13:01.639 partner, you can't keep opening the door to people who you feel like you 158 00:13:01.759 --> 00:13:07.799 have to manipulate yourself so they'll like you. Newsflash, But the person for 159 00:13:07.080 --> 00:13:13.120 you, you're not gonna have to manipulate yourself. For your higher self and 160 00:13:13.320 --> 00:13:16.600 their higher self, the person that is meant for you already knows you, 161 00:13:18.000 --> 00:13:22.120 and that other person exists. Your higher selves already know one another. They're 162 00:13:22.200 --> 00:13:26.759 already trying to connect the dots. Don't make it harder for their higher self 163 00:13:26.919 --> 00:13:30.759 and your higher self to connect the two of you. Don't make it harder 164 00:13:31.039 --> 00:13:33.440 for your higher self and their higher self to bring you towards one another. 165 00:13:33.799 --> 00:13:41.080 Because you keep opening doors to lower vibrational people that are hurting you. You 166 00:13:41.279 --> 00:13:46.279 have to realize you have so much more power than what you're using, and 167 00:13:46.559 --> 00:13:50.159 you have to be the one to close the door on people who aren't serving 168 00:13:50.240 --> 00:13:54.960 you so that you can allow the door that you actually want to open to 169 00:13:54.159 --> 00:13:58.919 become unlocked. Because before you can even open that door, you got to 170 00:13:58.919 --> 00:14:01.159 get the energetic key. And how are you supposed to get the energetic key 171 00:14:01.240 --> 00:14:05.960 to your life partner when you're having all these doors open to people who are 172 00:14:05.159 --> 00:14:11.240 just feeding on your energy. Now that I'm talking about this on this podcast, 173 00:14:11.440 --> 00:14:16.320 it has dawned on me that hookup culture is an egregor. Let me 174 00:14:16.399 --> 00:14:20.799 explain what that means. In agregor is a concept from occultism and mysticism that 175 00:14:20.960 --> 00:14:26.360 refers to a thought entity formed by a group of people shared beliefs, emotions, 176 00:14:26.559 --> 00:14:30.320 worship, and intentions. It is believed that when a group of people 177 00:14:30.440 --> 00:14:35.600 come together with a shared purpose, they can create a powerful energy field that 178 00:14:35.840 --> 00:14:39.080 takes on a life of its own. I want you to think about the 179 00:14:39.159 --> 00:14:43.120 holiday season. I want you to think about Christmas. For example. So 180 00:14:43.320 --> 00:14:48.240 many people have thoughts and intentions about what Christmas is. They think about Santa 181 00:14:48.279 --> 00:14:54.120 claus presence, and every year around Christmas time there is a special magic in 182 00:14:54.200 --> 00:14:58.799 the air that many of us feel. It's because Christmas in itself is an 183 00:14:58.840 --> 00:15:05.399 a Even if someone doesn't believe in Santa Claus per se, Christmas feels like 184 00:15:05.440 --> 00:15:09.519 a magical time because so many people are putting their energy towards it that Christmas 185 00:15:09.600 --> 00:15:16.200 itself becomes a living, breathing, energetic entity. Hook Up culture is an 186 00:15:16.360 --> 00:15:20.120 energetic entity. To me, It is living, It is breathing, and 187 00:15:20.320 --> 00:15:28.039 once hookup culture gets its claws into you and hooks you in. It controls 188 00:15:28.159 --> 00:15:33.200 you. You are not in control of yourself. Once you become involved in 189 00:15:33.320 --> 00:15:37.600 this hookup culture, you start making decisions where you think to yourself. You're 190 00:15:37.600 --> 00:15:41.440 probably not thinking at all at that point, but you might be thinking to 191 00:15:41.519 --> 00:15:45.240 yourself as an afterthought, why did I do that? Oh, I didn't 192 00:15:45.279 --> 00:15:48.840 mean to do that. That was not intentional. It's not intentional living. 193 00:15:50.960 --> 00:15:56.200 It's making panic decisions based on our ego or this entity is truly just moving 194 00:15:56.320 --> 00:16:03.000 through us, is how I really do see it. Everyone is so obsessed 195 00:16:03.080 --> 00:16:07.000 with detachment, and honestly, for what purpose, I don't know. I 196 00:16:07.320 --> 00:16:12.840 understand you don't want to be attached to random strangers at the bar. You 197 00:16:12.879 --> 00:16:18.000 don't want to be attached to an outcome, you don't want to be attached 198 00:16:18.039 --> 00:16:26.000 to a future scenario. But you also have to understand that our attachment system 199 00:16:26.120 --> 00:16:32.360 to other individuals is a strength that we got from survival of the fittest. 200 00:16:32.919 --> 00:16:37.399 Our attachment system has been passed down to us from our ancestors. It is 201 00:16:37.600 --> 00:16:41.799 not a weakness. Everyone is so afraid to actually have an attachment to another 202 00:16:41.919 --> 00:16:48.120 individual in a real, lasting relationship that everyone's just running to hook up culture. 203 00:16:48.759 --> 00:16:53.200 What are we actually aiming for? I don't know. And if you 204 00:16:53.320 --> 00:16:56.200 are to say, well, I want to have fun, okay? Is 205 00:16:56.279 --> 00:17:00.440 taking on other people's demons fun for you, because I don't find that that 206 00:17:00.679 --> 00:17:07.920 exciting. Is living unintentionally that exciting and fun to you because I don't find 207 00:17:07.000 --> 00:17:11.920 it as such. Is making panic decisions from your ego because you're actually trying 208 00:17:11.960 --> 00:17:17.599 to outrun your pain fun for you because I don't think it is. And 209 00:17:17.880 --> 00:17:21.440 yeah, I'm gonna be real with you. You might not even realize why 210 00:17:21.559 --> 00:17:25.279 you're doing what you're doing, and that's why I'm here to point out your 211 00:17:25.440 --> 00:17:32.000 blind spots. I think a lot of hookup culture is the illusion of choice. 212 00:17:32.519 --> 00:17:36.039 When you will go on to Netflix, there's an illusion that there's so 213 00:17:36.319 --> 00:17:38.799 many different things to pick from, but what do we all pick from the 214 00:17:38.920 --> 00:17:44.319 top ten? There's an illusion that there's an abundance of choice, but yet 215 00:17:44.319 --> 00:17:47.920 we're all watching the same thing because we end up just going with whatever Netflix 216 00:17:48.079 --> 00:17:52.400 is recommending. The illusion of choice makes people feel like they have such a 217 00:17:52.559 --> 00:18:00.839 wide range of choices, when in reality the choices are somewhat limited or not 218 00:18:00.960 --> 00:18:04.599 as much as a thought or somehow predetermined. I think this happens with dating 219 00:18:04.599 --> 00:18:07.200 apps a lot of the time. There's so many people you can just swipe, 220 00:18:07.240 --> 00:18:11.160 swipe, swipe, swipe through that people have this illusion of, well, 221 00:18:11.200 --> 00:18:12.480 there's always gonna be someone better, There's always gonna be someone better, 222 00:18:12.519 --> 00:18:17.559 There's always gonna be someone better. And partly, yes, if you're in 223 00:18:17.599 --> 00:18:21.640 a bad relationship, of course there's someone better. But to think that no 224 00:18:21.759 --> 00:18:26.559 one is ever good enough, well, you're just polarizing to the opposite end 225 00:18:26.599 --> 00:18:30.920 of the spectrum. And we have to find the dow the middle way where 226 00:18:30.960 --> 00:18:36.039 we recognize. I suppose that there could always be someone better, but who 227 00:18:36.160 --> 00:18:41.640 is a person I actually feel a connection with. If something doesn't feel like 228 00:18:41.799 --> 00:18:47.000 peace to you, get out. I said this before, but at the 229 00:18:47.079 --> 00:18:49.279 end of the day, do whatever you want. I'm just I'm just a 230 00:18:49.319 --> 00:18:52.680 life and energy coach, and I'm sharing what I know to be true and 231 00:18:52.839 --> 00:18:56.880 what I believe. You have free will, though, so you really get 232 00:18:57.000 --> 00:19:03.599 to do whatever the heck you want you do. I would invite you, 233 00:19:03.000 --> 00:19:07.839 if you have been participating in hookup culture, to just try something different, 234 00:19:08.240 --> 00:19:12.920 to try something different. I don't think that hookup culture gives people peace. 235 00:19:14.039 --> 00:19:17.720 Based on what I've seen with my friends, based on what I've seen with 236 00:19:17.799 --> 00:19:22.559 my clients, based on what I see on social media, I don't find 237 00:19:22.720 --> 00:19:26.720 that women specifically are finding peace and hookup culture. Yet we're allowing ourselves to 238 00:19:26.920 --> 00:19:30.480 engage with it. And at that point you really do need to hold yourself 239 00:19:30.519 --> 00:19:33.960 accountable and be like, oh, well, I'm the one participating in this. 240 00:19:34.400 --> 00:19:37.839 If I don't want to, that would mean I would have to stop. 241 00:19:40.480 --> 00:19:42.799 I think we also need to understand that we have a limited view. 242 00:19:42.920 --> 00:19:48.759 We talk about this a lot. If I was colorblind and you weren't, 243 00:19:48.920 --> 00:19:53.640 I would have to trust you to know more about the colors in this reality 244 00:19:55.200 --> 00:19:59.759 because I was limited. If we are limited by what we can see for 245 00:20:00.079 --> 00:20:06.079 our future, shouldn't we be trusting the all knowing eyes, ears, and 246 00:20:06.400 --> 00:20:14.680 energy that is God? Think about it. Think about it. We also 247 00:20:14.759 --> 00:20:21.599 need to touch on this study that came out that said forty five percent of 248 00:20:21.680 --> 00:20:26.000 twenty five to forty four year olds will be single and childless by twenty thirty 249 00:20:26.200 --> 00:20:30.039 and the reason they gave for this is because single women are expected to grow 250 00:20:30.799 --> 00:20:36.759 one point two percent annually in the workplace from twenty eighteen to twenty thirty, 251 00:20:37.000 --> 00:20:41.960 compared with point eight percent for the overall population. So they're saying that more 252 00:20:41.079 --> 00:20:45.720 women are becoming financially stable on their own, more of them are entering the 253 00:20:45.839 --> 00:20:52.079 workplace, so therefore they're not looking to have families and children. I don't 254 00:20:52.200 --> 00:20:57.759 know how accurate this study is. Number one, Number two, This is 255 00:20:57.880 --> 00:21:03.319 not a reality we have to subscribe to. Just because a statistic or a 256 00:21:03.359 --> 00:21:06.799 study says something doesn't mean you have to become a part of a statistic. 257 00:21:07.319 --> 00:21:11.640 That's number two. Number three. There's also studies, if we really want 258 00:21:11.680 --> 00:21:18.839 to talk about studies that show that in general, men are happier in a 259 00:21:18.920 --> 00:21:23.319 relationship and women are less happy in relationships because women usually take on more of 260 00:21:23.440 --> 00:21:27.599 the household labor. We're doing more of the cooking and the cleaning, the 261 00:21:27.720 --> 00:21:33.240 laundry, and so women's happiness tend to decrease, whereas a man's happiness tends 262 00:21:33.279 --> 00:21:41.079 to increase. So how do we bridge these studies that are happening? What 263 00:21:41.279 --> 00:21:44.359 do we think? Where do we go from this? A bunch of you 264 00:21:44.519 --> 00:21:48.480 were talking about this study, weren't wanting me to talk about it, So 265 00:21:48.319 --> 00:21:51.519 here are my thoughts. And then I'm going to go into the questions that 266 00:21:51.599 --> 00:21:55.119 you guys sent in. So first of all, I would be curious to 267 00:21:55.240 --> 00:21:57.519 know, well, how many men are going to be single and childless as 268 00:21:57.559 --> 00:22:00.599 well. I don't know why we're just talking about women. I would like 269 00:22:00.680 --> 00:22:06.720 to know about men as well. Number two, I think this is part 270 00:22:06.880 --> 00:22:12.440 two a reaction from our parents. I mean, my mom was a stay 271 00:22:12.480 --> 00:22:18.000 at home mom, and she always told me, make sure you have your 272 00:22:18.079 --> 00:22:21.240 own income. She also says, you'll probably want to be a stay at 273 00:22:21.279 --> 00:22:25.359 home mom eventually too, but she always instilled in me make sure you have 274 00:22:25.559 --> 00:22:30.359 something that's just your own. Judge Duty says the same thing. If you 275 00:22:30.440 --> 00:22:34.240 want to be free on planet Earth, you do have to have some sort 276 00:22:34.319 --> 00:22:38.599 of financial stability in order to do that. So I think that we saw 277 00:22:38.680 --> 00:22:42.559 a lot of women feeling trapped because they didn't have any sort of income. 278 00:22:42.960 --> 00:22:48.079 They had no way of getting out of a marriage if they wanted to, 279 00:22:48.559 --> 00:22:53.799 if it was not a healthy situation. So I think from fear, a 280 00:22:53.880 --> 00:22:56.400 lot of us are like, oh god, well I need to make sure 281 00:22:56.480 --> 00:23:00.440 that I have my own income and I'm doing this and that. So that 282 00:23:00.519 --> 00:23:03.359 could be part of it. I think another part of it is that we're 283 00:23:03.519 --> 00:23:12.440 living still in a very masculine, ego wounded society where people are prioritizing ego 284 00:23:12.599 --> 00:23:15.920 things such as money and cars and homes. And don't get me wrong, 285 00:23:17.240 --> 00:23:22.680 you guys know, I am a woman who likes the finer things in life. 286 00:23:22.000 --> 00:23:26.160 I will never lie about that. I definitely do like the finer things 287 00:23:26.200 --> 00:23:30.680 in life. So I'm not here to knock anybody's hustle. I think, 288 00:23:30.839 --> 00:23:37.160 though, we have to rein it in a little bit, because feminism started 289 00:23:37.200 --> 00:23:41.759 out as something that was really great. We need equal rights, we need 290 00:23:41.839 --> 00:23:45.839 to have the ability to vote. If I'm doing the same job as a 291 00:23:45.920 --> 00:23:48.920 man, I should be paid the same wage. However, as with most 292 00:23:49.640 --> 00:23:55.920 movements, they get taken and molded into something else for someone else's agenda, 293 00:23:56.000 --> 00:23:59.880 and that is what happened with feminism as well. They now are saying, 294 00:24:00.039 --> 00:24:02.680 if you want to beat the man, become more like him. And I 295 00:24:02.720 --> 00:24:04.599 don't want to be equal to a man. I personally want to be treated 296 00:24:04.759 --> 00:24:11.440 better. That is my truth. So what I think is that a lot 297 00:24:11.519 --> 00:24:14.920 of us, why would this study even happen. I think a lot of 298 00:24:15.039 --> 00:24:19.279 us are moving from our ego. Maybe a lot of us are prioritizing our 299 00:24:19.319 --> 00:24:23.079 career because our parents, our mothers, were like, prioritize your career, 300 00:24:23.200 --> 00:24:30.680 so you're not stuck. I think a lot of us at our unfortunately we 301 00:24:30.880 --> 00:24:33.039 don't actually know what's going to make us happy. And people are telling us 302 00:24:33.119 --> 00:24:36.440 a career will make you happy, and then we get the career, and 303 00:24:36.480 --> 00:24:38.880 then we're like, oh no, actually this isn't what I want. What 304 00:24:40.000 --> 00:24:41.559 I want as a family, I want to be a mom, I want 305 00:24:41.599 --> 00:24:45.119 to stay at home. So what is my answer? My answer is, 306 00:24:45.240 --> 00:24:52.559 you can't just let feminism or culture hookup culture me. You can't let people 307 00:24:52.720 --> 00:24:56.720 tell you what it is you truly want. You have to be a cognizant, 308 00:24:57.440 --> 00:25:03.240 conscious, aware human being. You need to wake up. You can't 309 00:25:03.400 --> 00:25:08.799 just listen to the voices out there that are saying, actually in either direction, 310 00:25:08.960 --> 00:25:12.240 really that oh you're twenty five and you're not engaged. Oh god, 311 00:25:12.400 --> 00:25:15.559 you're lost, you better get married tomorrow. We shouldn't listen to that. 312 00:25:17.039 --> 00:25:18.960 And we also shouldn't listen to you better get that career, you get better 313 00:25:19.000 --> 00:25:26.359 get that bag. It's just everyone's saying something. Everyone has an opinion, 314 00:25:26.119 --> 00:25:30.400 and you know what, no one knows what's best for you besides you. 315 00:25:30.319 --> 00:25:34.200 So you need to get quiet with yourself. You need to go inward. 316 00:25:34.599 --> 00:25:40.160 You need to find out what's truly going to make you happy. Maybe you 317 00:25:40.279 --> 00:25:41.359 go to college and you start out in a career and you're like, you 318 00:25:41.440 --> 00:25:45.759 know what, I actually don't want to do this. Okay, you will 319 00:25:45.799 --> 00:25:48.599 find your husband better yet, he will find you. That's another thing I've 320 00:25:48.640 --> 00:25:52.759 realized. I was thinking after my relationship, like, Okay, I'm gonna 321 00:25:52.759 --> 00:25:56.599 go find my husband now. And now after two months, I have now 322 00:25:56.759 --> 00:26:00.960 realized I am not going to find my husband. He can find me. 323 00:26:00.519 --> 00:26:06.279 I will be resting on my pedestal. Let me know. Anyway. My 324 00:26:06.440 --> 00:26:11.079 point is we can't let these external voices tell us what to do because they're 325 00:26:11.119 --> 00:26:15.279 getting in our head and then our ego is driving us. Oh, you 326 00:26:15.440 --> 00:26:21.480 have to be the top of your chain at whatever corporate ladder that I can't 327 00:26:21.519 --> 00:26:25.039 even talk corporate. Did you hear that sentence that made no sense? Oh 328 00:26:25.279 --> 00:26:29.799 my god. Okay, what I was trying to say is you have to 329 00:26:30.039 --> 00:26:33.440 climb that corporate ladder or you have to get married tomorrow. Oh my god, 330 00:26:33.599 --> 00:26:37.319 can everyone shut up? Shut up? Shut up, everyone, shut 331 00:26:37.440 --> 00:26:41.480 up. I can't take it. I can't take it because in my life 332 00:26:41.720 --> 00:26:48.079 I've heard both voices and they're both this same They're coming from the same vein. 333 00:26:48.119 --> 00:26:52.359 They're just opposite sides of the spectrum. But either way, it's mumbo 334 00:26:52.519 --> 00:26:55.599 jumbo. No one can tell me what's best for me. I know what's 335 00:26:55.640 --> 00:26:57.799 best for me. I have to find my path, just like you have 336 00:26:57.960 --> 00:27:03.559 to find your own path too. I don't care whether you want to be 337 00:27:03.640 --> 00:27:07.359 at the top of a corporate ladder or you want to nurse fifteen thousand children. 338 00:27:07.240 --> 00:27:11.480 Either way, good luck. Okay, that's what I think. But 339 00:27:11.759 --> 00:27:15.240 what I want for you is that you actually find out what it is you 340 00:27:15.359 --> 00:27:18.240 truly want, not what people are telling you that you should want. Because 341 00:27:18.319 --> 00:27:22.519 feminism is gonna say you need to be in at the top of that corporate 342 00:27:22.599 --> 00:27:26.000 ladder, and then your aunts and uncles are gonna tell you you need to 343 00:27:26.039 --> 00:27:32.200 get married tomorrow, maybe your parents too, So you need to figure out 344 00:27:32.799 --> 00:27:37.720 Wait a second, hmm, what do I actually want. I can tell 345 00:27:37.799 --> 00:27:41.440 you my life does not look like anyone that I know. I don't know 346 00:27:41.519 --> 00:27:45.759 anyone else personally in my life who's creating content. Oh, I do know 347 00:27:45.839 --> 00:27:49.519 one person, but I really don't know many people who are creating content in 348 00:27:49.559 --> 00:27:52.720 the way that I'm doing, living life how I'm living. I don't know 349 00:27:52.799 --> 00:27:56.720 anyone who's in a relationship for seven years and then decience to go through and 350 00:27:56.880 --> 00:28:02.079 break up instead of getting married. I don't know, but you know what, 351 00:28:02.400 --> 00:28:06.880 I know it's right for me and that's what matters. So don't compare 352 00:28:06.920 --> 00:28:11.799 yourself to Stacy and Rachel. You need to be asking yourself what is it 353 00:28:11.880 --> 00:28:15.920 that I really want? And then you need to create quiet silence for yourself 354 00:28:17.039 --> 00:28:19.720 to actually find out what it is you do want. You might have to 355 00:28:19.799 --> 00:28:25.119 date yourself. You might have to take yourself to new places, try new 356 00:28:26.279 --> 00:28:30.559 hobbies and activities, read new books, get involved with different thought forms and 357 00:28:30.720 --> 00:28:36.359 systems. You might have to put yourself out there to find you so you 358 00:28:36.480 --> 00:28:41.200 can find what's going to make you happy. And sometimes we have to start 359 00:28:41.240 --> 00:28:44.599 out with what doesn't make us happy. Anytime I want to order food but 360 00:28:44.680 --> 00:28:47.640 I don't know what I want, I'll start with what I definitely don't want. 361 00:28:47.920 --> 00:28:52.079 Well, I don't want steak, and I don't want tacos. Maybe 362 00:28:52.160 --> 00:28:55.880 I'll get this caesar salad. You know, start with what you don't want 363 00:28:55.920 --> 00:29:00.359 and that will also help you clarify what you do want. Contrast leads to 364 00:29:00.480 --> 00:29:07.200 clarification. Okay, let's get into some of the questions that you have asked. 365 00:29:07.640 --> 00:29:11.359 One positive bitch asked, if a guy just wanted to hook up but 366 00:29:11.519 --> 00:29:15.559 you don't, is it okay to ghosts? Do they need an explanation why? 367 00:29:17.599 --> 00:29:19.720 And she also asked how to stop feeling bad for ghosting someone that just 368 00:29:19.799 --> 00:29:25.880 wanted to hook up. So I think if you're not talking on a daily 369 00:29:26.039 --> 00:29:30.720 basis and they're just trying to bring you into the bedroom, there's nothing wrong 370 00:29:30.799 --> 00:29:37.359 with just unplugging and saying I'm done. Not everyone deserves an explanation of why 371 00:29:37.519 --> 00:29:41.119 you have to leave their life, because a lot of them won't be able 372 00:29:41.200 --> 00:29:45.079 to receive it anyway and are committed to misunderstanding you. If you have a 373 00:29:45.279 --> 00:29:48.920 friendship with this person, if you have a real relationship with this person and 374 00:29:49.000 --> 00:29:52.880 you talk about your fears and your anxieties and you're talking every single day, 375 00:29:52.960 --> 00:29:56.680 well then I would say, hey, look, this isn't working for me 376 00:29:56.839 --> 00:29:59.960 because you only want to be intimate with me and I want a real relationship 377 00:30:00.599 --> 00:30:03.039 and just be like I'm not interested. But if that is not the case, 378 00:30:03.119 --> 00:30:07.640 and you talk only when he wants to hook up. You don't owe 379 00:30:07.680 --> 00:30:11.000 that person an explanation. You can just unplug. I don't think that's ghosting. 380 00:30:11.119 --> 00:30:15.839 I think that's repositioning yourself or a happier present and future. Do you 381 00:30:17.079 --> 00:30:22.119 think the study is because a lack of feminine energy. I think it's a 382 00:30:22.240 --> 00:30:29.680 lack of consciousness. It's a lack of being connected to ourselves, over reliance 383 00:30:29.799 --> 00:30:33.440 on our ego and yeah, being in our wounded masculine chasing the wrong thing. 384 00:30:33.960 --> 00:30:38.119 I listen sometimes to podcasts and there's definitely people out there chasing the wrong 385 00:30:38.240 --> 00:30:44.400 thing. The money they're trying to flex on Instagram. I mean, vomit 386 00:30:45.039 --> 00:30:51.000 vomit city that I that's not my vibe. I do think people are chasing 387 00:30:51.039 --> 00:30:56.000 the wrong thing because I don't think anyone has been truthful to them on how 388 00:30:56.079 --> 00:31:02.160 they can find their own happiness. Happiness is for everyone, probably comes in 389 00:31:02.319 --> 00:31:04.759 many different shapes and sizes. I don't think it's a one size fits all. 390 00:31:06.400 --> 00:31:11.240 Some people are happy working at the top of a corporate ladder and that's 391 00:31:11.279 --> 00:31:14.880 what they want to do, and some people are happy working on a farm. 392 00:31:15.240 --> 00:31:17.960 Some people are happy being a teacher. Some people are happy just staying 393 00:31:18.039 --> 00:31:22.640 at home. I'm not here to tell you how to be happy, but 394 00:31:22.799 --> 00:31:25.920 I will invite you to find out how to connect to yourself so you can 395 00:31:26.039 --> 00:31:29.880 find your own definition of happiness. And that's really what this comes down to. 396 00:31:30.000 --> 00:31:34.200 And it was just two to two on my timer. Someone said men 397 00:31:34.440 --> 00:31:37.680 collectively need to step it up right because we know are worth more now. 398 00:31:38.319 --> 00:31:44.799 That is definitely I believe part of this as well. We need to stop 399 00:31:44.960 --> 00:31:51.440 engaging in hookup culture so we are not under the veil of confusion and emotion. 400 00:31:52.200 --> 00:31:55.519 We need to be in control of our own minds and hearts. And 401 00:31:55.640 --> 00:32:00.119 the way to do that is to create space from hookup culture and instead that 402 00:32:00.240 --> 00:32:05.559 connect to ourselves because again, we can't be connected to ourselves and door opened 403 00:32:05.599 --> 00:32:07.920 on ourselves if we have doors open to Tom, Jerry and Brad. We 404 00:32:08.079 --> 00:32:13.839 need to be focused here to hear ourselves. So when you unplug from hookup 405 00:32:13.880 --> 00:32:19.119 culture, you're actually plugging into yourself, and that means plugging into your future 406 00:32:19.160 --> 00:32:23.400 self. That means plugging into your potential, plugging into God. I think 407 00:32:23.480 --> 00:32:30.039 that because women now have more opportunity in ways that they haven't in the past, 408 00:32:30.559 --> 00:32:34.000 we are higher on the corporate ladder, we can make more money, 409 00:32:34.200 --> 00:32:38.319 we have more financial freedom. Now we're thinking to ourselves, well, yeah, 410 00:32:38.400 --> 00:32:43.000 I want a guy who's equal to me or maybe above me, can 411 00:32:43.079 --> 00:32:47.279 inspire me or above me in different ways where you can teach each other different 412 00:32:47.359 --> 00:32:51.359 things. You might know things he doesn't, he will know things you don't, 413 00:32:51.400 --> 00:32:58.079 and you can inspire one another. But I definitely think men do need 414 00:32:58.200 --> 00:33:01.920 to step it up. I feel like women are the most powerful things on 415 00:33:02.039 --> 00:33:06.599 this planet. I've really do, and I think that if women stop allowing 416 00:33:06.759 --> 00:33:09.319 men to just get what they want in the bedroom, they would step it 417 00:33:09.440 --> 00:33:13.720 up. So, actually, if we want men to step it up, 418 00:33:13.799 --> 00:33:16.720 what if we just took total responsibility and said, I'm no longer going to 419 00:33:16.839 --> 00:33:21.599 allow you to have all these pieces of me without giving me something that I 420 00:33:21.720 --> 00:33:25.680 truly desire. Because you know, I am not one to give up my 421 00:33:25.880 --> 00:33:30.599 power, and I'm not one to tell you that we are just powerless. 422 00:33:30.720 --> 00:33:32.440 I'm not one to say, oh, it's the men's fault. No, 423 00:33:32.519 --> 00:33:37.200 it's all of our faults. Let's all wake up. What is anybody doing 424 00:33:37.240 --> 00:33:39.920 anymore? I truly don't know. We all need to wake up. It's 425 00:33:39.960 --> 00:33:45.759 everybody's fault. And if everyone takes total responsibility over what they're doing, image 426 00:33:46.519 --> 00:33:51.880 imagine the world we could live in. I'm never gonna blame a gender for 427 00:33:52.039 --> 00:33:58.559 all of life's problems. That makes no sense. Uh, And any person 428 00:33:58.640 --> 00:34:04.480 who does that, they're wrong and they're talking from the ego themselves. Okay, 429 00:34:05.400 --> 00:34:07.800 someone said this scares me. Honestly, I want to have more babies 430 00:34:07.840 --> 00:34:12.599 and I want to be a wife in my lifetime. God's timing. Look. 431 00:34:12.719 --> 00:34:15.400 Oh, I just got goosebumps from that, because I think that when 432 00:34:15.440 --> 00:34:17.159 I went through my breakup, I was thinking to myself, Oh, I'm 433 00:34:17.159 --> 00:34:22.440 twenty six. I have to like find my husband right now. I gotta 434 00:34:22.480 --> 00:34:24.599 get on this because in three years, if it takes that long to date 435 00:34:24.639 --> 00:34:27.559 and then we want to get married, and then I'll be in my early 436 00:34:27.840 --> 00:34:34.119 thirties. There's definitely that narrative that's out there for sure. And that was 437 00:34:34.199 --> 00:34:39.360 my ego talking. And I've now realized God's timing number one. But number 438 00:34:39.440 --> 00:34:45.920 two, I've missed my own energy and like it makes me almost very emotional. 439 00:34:46.440 --> 00:34:50.400 I'm like, it makes me almost as I am about to pour out. 440 00:34:51.079 --> 00:34:59.880 It makes me emotional how much I've missed me truly like I missed. 441 00:35:00.320 --> 00:35:06.119 And in relationships, men do feed on our energy and that's not a bad 442 00:35:06.199 --> 00:35:10.880 thing that that is just something that happens in relationships. And I've missed pouring 443 00:35:10.960 --> 00:35:20.119 into myself for sure, and I've missed being able to really just focus on 444 00:35:20.280 --> 00:35:24.239 me. And then those fears came into my head too, of like oh 445 00:35:24.320 --> 00:35:29.679 my god, twenty six, next year, twenty seven, Oh my god, 446 00:35:29.719 --> 00:35:35.000 and like you know, I get the narrative, but for me, 447 00:35:35.400 --> 00:35:38.239 that narrative quickly I killed it right away. And the reason I killed it 448 00:35:38.599 --> 00:35:43.400 was because then I remembered, wait a second, God doesn't play jokes on 449 00:35:43.480 --> 00:35:47.320 his daughters. There's divine timing for everything. You can't force your baby to 450 00:35:47.400 --> 00:35:51.159 come out at three months if it wants to come out at nine months. 451 00:35:51.960 --> 00:35:54.960 You have to understand that we are one with nature, and just like nature 452 00:35:55.000 --> 00:36:00.639 has seasons, so do wait. We have divine time. I'm being at 453 00:36:00.760 --> 00:36:04.440 play in our life, and if we are trying to fight against it, 454 00:36:04.519 --> 00:36:08.440 we're just gonna get frustrated and possibly delay it. So instead of engaging in 455 00:36:08.519 --> 00:36:12.800 hookup culture or for me personally, not hookup culture, but instead of going 456 00:36:12.800 --> 00:36:15.320 out every weekend, forcing myself to go out and see people when I don't 457 00:36:15.320 --> 00:36:20.639 even want to. I'm listening to my body more than ever now and saying 458 00:36:20.679 --> 00:36:22.800 no, If I want to just stay in and watch Bridgerton, That's what 459 00:36:22.840 --> 00:36:25.599 I'm gonna do. If I want to stay in and just do a meditation, 460 00:36:27.239 --> 00:36:31.480 That's what I'm gonna do. I know that divine timing is at play 461 00:36:31.519 --> 00:36:36.800 in my life. I know that I have different seasons, and I really 462 00:36:36.880 --> 00:36:45.119 do feel for me this is a season of growing and developing and really leaning 463 00:36:45.199 --> 00:36:49.639 into myself and pouring into myself. I might never have this time again where 464 00:36:50.199 --> 00:36:54.079 my main responsibility is just me. You might never have that chance and opportunity 465 00:36:54.159 --> 00:36:59.039 that your main responsibility is just you either, So why don't we take advantage 466 00:36:59.079 --> 00:37:05.440 of this? I will say, I think that participating in hookup culture does 467 00:37:05.639 --> 00:37:09.480 delay us because we get an entanglements, then we might have to work out 468 00:37:09.559 --> 00:37:15.639 karma. Then we're getting emotionally involved with people who we shouldn't be emotionally involved 469 00:37:15.679 --> 00:37:17.119 with because they can never give us what we wanted. And they said that 470 00:37:17.239 --> 00:37:21.079 to us, but we thought we could convince them to change, but really 471 00:37:21.559 --> 00:37:25.880 we can't because they already know what they want. So yeah, Why do 472 00:37:27.000 --> 00:37:30.599 people care so much about others? Why can't they just be happy and live 473 00:37:30.639 --> 00:37:32.960 their own life? I mean period, most people aren't happy, and that's 474 00:37:32.960 --> 00:37:37.519 why they're so consumed with other people and what they're doing, because they're bored. 475 00:37:39.280 --> 00:37:44.559 How can I smooth my nervous system? My heart is racing so much. 476 00:37:44.679 --> 00:37:47.760 If you're having a season of anxiety, take your dominant hand and massage 477 00:37:47.840 --> 00:37:52.280 the back of your neck. This will help tone your vagus nerve. It's 478 00:37:52.320 --> 00:37:58.840 called vagel massaging or vegas massaging, and it will help relax our nervous system. 479 00:37:59.360 --> 00:38:06.960 Do more journaling, do more meditation, and do energetic transmutation where you 480 00:38:07.079 --> 00:38:12.760 are taking these lower vibrational emotions, and create beauty, create art, sing 481 00:38:13.079 --> 00:38:16.039 dance, make a poem, whatever it is you want to do. What 482 00:38:16.199 --> 00:38:20.079 to do? If I'm so so afraid I'll never find my soulmate, it's 483 00:38:20.079 --> 00:38:22.800 hard for me to bond with people. Everyone should read my books show up 484 00:38:22.800 --> 00:38:28.719 as her, but also the book called Only Love Is Real by doctor Brian 485 00:38:28.840 --> 00:38:34.679 Weis because it is so amazing and it really reminds you that your love that 486 00:38:34.920 --> 00:38:38.280 is meant to come into your life will come into your life. But focus 487 00:38:38.400 --> 00:38:43.079 on you in the meantime, focus on your healing in the meantime, focus 488 00:38:43.199 --> 00:38:46.559 on building yourself up in the meantime. Moral of the story is, we 489 00:38:46.679 --> 00:38:52.320 don't have to subscribe to a reality we don't want to exist within. So 490 00:38:52.440 --> 00:38:55.280 if you're thinking, well, I don't want to be single and childless in 491 00:38:55.400 --> 00:39:00.679 that year, Okay, what do we actually do? Number one? I 492 00:39:00.840 --> 00:39:05.039 want you to make a list of the kind of partner you want. Not 493 00:39:05.280 --> 00:39:08.480 only do I want you to write down how they are. I want you 494 00:39:08.599 --> 00:39:14.599 to write down how they make you feel. So maybe you write they're into 495 00:39:14.639 --> 00:39:16.800 fitness, they have a relationship with God. And then you're gonna write how 496 00:39:16.880 --> 00:39:21.639 they make you feel. They make me feel loved, they make me feel 497 00:39:21.760 --> 00:39:23.880 safe, they make me feel seen, They're happy to be with me. 498 00:39:23.960 --> 00:39:28.719 They put me first. Okay, so you're gonna make a list because we 499 00:39:28.840 --> 00:39:31.519 need to know what we want. Secondly, I want you to look at 500 00:39:31.559 --> 00:39:37.760 this list. Does it sound like you and be honest with yourself. You 501 00:39:37.880 --> 00:39:43.960 want them to have a relationship with God. But do you are we reading 502 00:39:44.039 --> 00:39:46.519 that Bible? Are we going into nature? Are we connecting to God? 503 00:39:46.559 --> 00:39:51.960 Are we doing our meditation? Are we journaling? Are we sounding like our 504 00:39:52.079 --> 00:39:57.360 list because like does attract like. I don't like to think that we're just 505 00:39:58.159 --> 00:40:01.199 waiting for our person to come into our life, and I don't want to 506 00:40:01.239 --> 00:40:07.199 think that we're looking for them either. I like to think, let's live 507 00:40:07.440 --> 00:40:12.599 because we incarnated here to live, we incarnated here to have a purpose and 508 00:40:12.679 --> 00:40:16.159 a potential. Let's know what we want. But in the meantime, let's 509 00:40:16.239 --> 00:40:21.920 become our own dream girl. And if you become your own dream girl, 510 00:40:22.159 --> 00:40:27.719 that vibration is going to pull in your dream partner. I was thinking the 511 00:40:27.840 --> 00:40:30.599 other day. Right now, I'm doing a lot of healing. I'm doing 512 00:40:30.599 --> 00:40:34.920 a lot of reflecting. I'm doing a lot of releasing and purging, not 513 00:40:35.119 --> 00:40:37.400 just from this lifetime, but other lifetimes as well. I'm sure of it. 514 00:40:38.119 --> 00:40:40.760 And if I were to align with someone right now, it wouldn't be 515 00:40:40.840 --> 00:40:45.880 a person I would ultimately want to be with because I am not where I 516 00:40:45.079 --> 00:40:51.079 want to be energetically, because I'm going through another transition. Just think about 517 00:40:51.119 --> 00:40:53.119 it. Are you where you want to be? Do you feel like you 518 00:40:53.320 --> 00:40:58.559 are at a point in your life where your mind is where you want it 519 00:40:58.599 --> 00:41:00.800 to be, Your health is where you want to to be, your home 520 00:41:00.880 --> 00:41:02.039 is where you want it to be. Your career is where you want it 521 00:41:02.119 --> 00:41:07.840 to be. If not, those are all lovely things that you can pour 522 00:41:07.000 --> 00:41:13.920 into. Those are things that you can strengthen within yourself. I know that 523 00:41:14.039 --> 00:41:17.480 we have all we all have things we could focus on if we really wanted 524 00:41:17.559 --> 00:41:21.840 to. I know we all have things that we could pour into if we 525 00:41:22.039 --> 00:41:24.320 really wanted to. But most of us are like, no, I'll just 526 00:41:24.440 --> 00:41:28.920 ignore that and I'll just get a partner to distract me. Maybe a partner 527 00:41:29.119 --> 00:41:31.559 would be a distraction from what you actually need to do in this season. 528 00:41:32.159 --> 00:41:37.400 What is this season inviting you to do? I think that when we take 529 00:41:37.519 --> 00:41:43.559 our present moment and we just juice it up and live within it, that 530 00:41:43.760 --> 00:41:45.880 is being in our divine, feminine energy. That is being in our attracting 531 00:41:46.000 --> 00:41:52.559 energy. That is us truly being on our pedestal. And when we look 532 00:41:52.599 --> 00:41:54.760 at what this season is offering us and we say, you know what, 533 00:41:54.840 --> 00:41:58.679 I finally have the time to do what it is I want to do around 534 00:41:58.719 --> 00:42:01.239 my house, or I finally have the time to write that book or write 535 00:42:01.280 --> 00:42:05.880 that song. I finally have the time to reconnect with my friends, or 536 00:42:05.960 --> 00:42:10.199 work on my spirituality or my relationship with God, that is what we ought 537 00:42:10.320 --> 00:42:15.880 to be doing. That is what we're being invited to do. The present 538 00:42:15.000 --> 00:42:20.320 moment oftentimes has a really good idea of what we need, and that's why 539 00:42:20.400 --> 00:42:25.119 it's offering it to us. The present moment is extending some energetic invitation to 540 00:42:25.199 --> 00:42:29.159 you. But what are you doing trying to think about something that is not 541 00:42:29.280 --> 00:42:32.199 here just yet? I think that when you lean into your present, you 542 00:42:32.360 --> 00:42:36.679 end up having so much fun. The time flies and then that next future 543 00:42:36.760 --> 00:42:40.280 moment comes and you get whatever it is you want. Have your list of 544 00:42:40.360 --> 00:42:45.400 what you want, but also have a list of what you want to work 545 00:42:45.440 --> 00:42:49.360 on right now, what you want to strengthen, what you want to build 546 00:42:49.440 --> 00:42:52.719 up and pour into in your own life. I know I say this a 547 00:42:52.760 --> 00:42:55.519 lot, but at the end of the day, people come in our life, 548 00:42:55.599 --> 00:42:58.599 people will leave our life. At the end of the day, we 549 00:42:58.760 --> 00:43:01.079 just have ourselves to go to sleep with ourselves, wake up with ourselves, 550 00:43:01.239 --> 00:43:05.599 eat with ourselves. We have to be in our body every damn day. 551 00:43:05.960 --> 00:43:12.119 Are you building a body and a life you actually enjoy existing within? And 552 00:43:12.199 --> 00:43:15.199 when you feel the loneliness, when you feel the boredom, when you feel 553 00:43:15.280 --> 00:43:19.599 the sadness, those are not things to run from and plug into hookup culture 554 00:43:19.679 --> 00:43:24.119 with Those are things to feel into in that present moment. Those emotions are 555 00:43:24.159 --> 00:43:28.920 inviting you to feel them out and wring them out like a towel so you 556 00:43:29.079 --> 00:43:35.800 can heal. Don't let these emotions keep stringing you back into hookup culture. 557 00:43:35.880 --> 00:43:38.400 That is keeping you stuck because doing the same thing will get us the same 558 00:43:38.440 --> 00:43:44.000 results. So if you want different results, we have to take different action. 559 00:43:44.760 --> 00:43:47.920 Feel into your present moment, whether it's sadness, boredom, loneliness. 560 00:43:49.360 --> 00:43:52.519 What is your present moment offering you do you feel like you're tired, stay 561 00:43:52.599 --> 00:43:58.000 in, stay home. All will be fine. God has a funny way 562 00:43:58.039 --> 00:44:01.320 of working everything out for us. Your higher self and their higher self is 563 00:44:01.400 --> 00:44:06.480 working on the game plan. You don't have to worry about it. Worrying 564 00:44:06.800 --> 00:44:12.000 is worshiping your problems. Give it up to God, let go and let 565 00:44:12.480 --> 00:44:16.000 flow. I promise you, if you don't want that reality, you don't 566 00:44:16.039 --> 00:44:20.199 have to have it. You can unsubscribe from it. Also, we don't 567 00:44:20.239 --> 00:44:22.800 even know if any of what they're saying is true. They're predicting, and 568 00:44:23.119 --> 00:44:28.360 energy is subject to change. Every second of the day. Energy is changing 569 00:44:28.440 --> 00:44:31.480 and changing and changing That's why tarot cards. They can read the present energy 570 00:44:31.559 --> 00:44:37.840 that's around you. But energy is subject to change every second, and therefore 571 00:44:37.960 --> 00:44:43.239 it really can only see one energetic timeline at a time when there's unlimited potentials. 572 00:44:44.039 --> 00:44:47.840 This study is just one potential. There's unlimited potentials for us to go 573 00:44:49.000 --> 00:44:53.360 on to so really it means nothing. It means nothing. Focus on you, 574 00:44:53.920 --> 00:44:59.360 Strengthen the areas of your life you want to see a little bit stronger 575 00:45:00.119 --> 00:45:04.800 into yourself. We're on this journey together. Everything I'm learning I will give 576 00:45:04.880 --> 00:45:07.440 to you as well. But I'm telling you this is a season that we 577 00:45:07.599 --> 00:45:12.679 lean into ourselves. I've never felt anything so strong. If you're enjoying this 578 00:45:12.800 --> 00:45:15.960 podcast, please leave a positive review on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. It helps 579 00:45:16.000 --> 00:45:19.559 this podcast grow. Means the world to me, and if not for me, 580 00:45:19.719 --> 00:45:22.239 do it for you because good karma. And of course, if you've 581 00:45:22.280 --> 00:45:23.880 not yet gotten your copy of Show Up, Best Hurt, be sure to 582 00:45:23.920 --> 00:45:28.079 get that. It will be in the show notes. We dive into all 583 00:45:28.800 --> 00:45:31.880 of laws of magnetic energy and so much more. And of course be sure 584 00:45:31.920 --> 00:45:37.440 to follow me on Instagram at vibein with CC for daily tips and tricks on 585 00:45:37.519 --> 00:45:50.039 magnetic energy, I'll see you in the next one. No energy cancer. 586 00:46:00.280 --> 00:46:14.679 It's a kiss me kiss me h.