Made a decision. I'll face sunny sumad on. I had a vision nightby
what's that? What's up? Hey? Hey? Hey? Yeah, anyway,
Yeah, we love all you supporters out there, and we're gonna do
a Patreon zoom right for our ten dollars and up supporters. Yeah. Uh,
what's today's date? Well, when's this show? When does this show
air? Oh? Oh tomorrow? Yeah, the eighteenth? Okay, should
we do it like the last Sunday of the month. Yeah, let's what
day is that weekend? Oh? But we could do it next week this
Sunday. Oh, I can't do it this Sunday because I'm doing a storytelling
show. So in two weeks, two weeks, not this Sunday, not
the next Sunday, but the one after that, first Sunday of first Sunday
of August. Guys, sign up, sign up, and we're gonna do
it. That's it. It's on the calendar. To zoom that shit is
inked. Yeah, yeah, zoom. Hang all right, and here's some
people that will be there for sure. Aaron who is who it is?
It's Aaron Landis, That's who it is. Rachel newcomer. I love Rachel.
By the way, she's in my writing class, and she's super phenomenally
talented. Honestly, Randy May aims she has a lot of names against it.
Lori Gory m hmm. That's good for Halloween, Nikki call your girl,
your girl, Ashleys so chic. Leslie's a still up to accosting people
outside of still Ikia target. I heard she was circling, targeting. Fucking
Jesus Jacob Snotti's still it's gonna say, said Green. That's Sanda Green.
Uh Rita rocks that bassinet with all of Elizabeth Williamson's so many children stop enough,
hero Yeah, Ashta, your kids love you. Athena Genshirt, We
love you, Polly, We love your pancakes. Valerie, Bubba Fenwick,
Katerina get that mollar check, Gabby and Missy who girl? They melted away
with the heat? Is Sean talk about hat um? Kelly Brandt, She'll
take it to hip hop. Alicia Escalante from the City of Leslie is still
coughing. You know what. COVID's back though, so I don't blame her
all right, Sarah Stafano, Jennifer get up, Christa get the strap.
Yeah, Stephanie is a Stephanie is going to be in my storytelling show.
Yeah, what's what's the storytelling show? So? Um, I take students,
I take people who have done my class before, and they read a
piece that they worked on in my group. Nice, and it's a story
telling show. And I'm going to read something from Drunkish Nice. Yeah,
it's a zoom. All are welcome. It's on an event bright. I
put it on her for crying out loud. I put it on her Facebook
page, so you can go buy a ticket if you want from there,
anybody who cares to come. It's like an hour and fifteen minutes out of
your night. It's six pm Pacific time, this Sunday, this Sunday.
Um, Stephanie's in it, and Christie, our friend Christie is in it.
And there's some for crying out loud of people. That's awesome on it,
I know, right yeah fuck, oh my god. So I got
a new dryer, yes, big news, So did you? Okay?
So last week last I was here. First of all, after I talked
about it on the show, like Robin was Zinski called me and she was
like, girl, I think I know it's wrong with your dryer. This
happens a lot, right, I love her. She was like, listen,
I know what it is. This totally happened to me. Got a
new dryer. Okay, here's what you're gonna want to do. You're gonna
want to go outside to where the exit where the air comes outside your house,
and there's like a lap, there's like a flap, and you're gonna
want to open that. It probably closed and that's what happened. So you're
gonna open it with your finger or with like a butter knife. You know.
I got super explicit like instructions. I'm like, okay on it,
Like I'm I'm taking you with me. So I go out there, I
go outside. I finally where the air's where the vent comes out. It's
just open. There's no flap. I'm like, flap, I know,
isn't it like a like a PC bipe CV bipe, But then's just open
like flap, It's just open, right, So I show so I take
a picture of that. I'm like, there's no flap, no flap here,
and she's like, no, I think there's probably a flap there.
I'm like, bitch, there's no flap here. I take a picture of
it. I'm like do you see a flap. There's no flap, And
she's like, well, check with your finger and see if it's like blocked
up with something. I'm like, all right, but it's obviously not,
because my old dryer was working just fine. It was the new dryer not
so much, right right, So did it suddenly just get blocked off?
Like right, right right? My old dryer wasn't not working. It was
just loud, right, that was the problem. Okay, So anyway,
I had called I called the you know, I told you, I called
Whirlpool, and Whirlpool was like, listen, that's a lows issue. You
gotta call rows back, and you got to tell them I think it was
a problem with the installation and we're gonna have to charge you. And then
I think I told you that this is where we left off in the story.
It's a pretty good story, Kaylen, I'm gonna need your full attention
on this one. It's good. So I'm on hold for like an hour.
You know, I'm like not only a default parent, but the default
like person who has to wait on hold for blue shield or dryer repair.
Okay, So then they were supposed to call me within twenty four hours and
then remember how we were recording and nobody called me. Okay, So I
went home that day from recording and I called them back and I was like,
hi, you guys were supposed to call me in twenty four hours and
nobody called me. So she looks up the thing and she's like, oh,
yeah, so we were You know how frustrating that is when you're like
yeah, okay, yeah, So this is what she says. You know
what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna escalate this. I'm like, well,
okay, Meanwhile, I don't have a working dryer. I got clothes piling
up. There's like a lot of clothes. So what does that mean it's
gonna get escalated? She's like, it means you're definitely going to get a
call in twenty four hours. I'm like, but that was what the last
bitch said. I didn't use the word bitch, I said, but the
last person said you're gonna get called in twenty four hours. So what makes
me believe that? Now? Oh, now it's really going to be twenty
four hours because you said you're escalating it. We're just kidding before, right,
She goes, well, no, no, no, I'm sending it
at now a manager is to see this, and I was like, okay,
and I am being so cool about it. I have to hand it
to myself, you know why, because screaming at people doesn't do any good.
And also I was aware of the fact that this is such a first
world problem. I'm like, yeah, I could be having to hang all
my clothes on a clothesline, right, I'm lucky that I have a dryer
in the first place. So whatever. I'm like, okay, but what
happens if you guys don't call me in twenty four hours? Then what's my
next recourse? Do you have a different case number? Like what happens when
I for sure have to call back in twenty four hours? She's like,
no, You're not gonna have to call back. Somebody's going to call you.
I go, okay, Well, so I'm like, what are you
gonna do? You know? So then John's like what they say, I'm
like to another twenty four hours. He's like, oh yeah, sure,
And I'm like, I know, but what am I supposed to do?
Like I can't. Getting mad doesn't help. Okay, So the next morning
I do get a call and you're going to totally relate to this, you
know how Now it is everything like says scam, spam likely, scam likely,
Yes, okay, when your phone rings right from an unknown number,
but you know that feeling when you're like waiting for a doctor to call back,
or waiting for like a dryer repair to call back. Then you got
to answer every call, and like half of them are sales calls. So
they'll be like, is this missus Tyler like, oh god, I got
one leak through. So I answer. I answer a call from an unknown
caller, you know, from a random number, and it is the dryer
person, and they're like, hey, so we're gonna send somebody out.
And it was flag spam. No, it didn't say spam. It just
was a number I didn't recognize. So like you're forced to answer those numbers,
you know, So I answer it so anyway so that she's like,
tomorrow, we're going to send somebody out to fix it. And I was
like, okay, I go, so how do I know if you're sending
me a new dryer? What if it was just installed incorrectly? And she's
like, oh, well, I could send somebody out to check the installation
and just do a repair and I was like, okay, so what if
then they say that's the dryer. Then she's like, well, then I'll
need to set up having the dryer come. And I was like, then,
just have the dryer come. Yeah, and if it's not broken the
one we have, then they can take the new one back. Right.
She's like great, that's what I was suggesting. So I'm like, good,
then we're clear on how we're going to handle this. So the guy
came out the next day sure enough, and uh. I was like,
so what and he's like, yeah, it's just the dryer doesn't work.
I'm like, well, so you're saying. He's like, no, I've
checked every lot I've checked. He's like, sometimes they just don't work.
He goes, sometimes it's the computer system. Isn't this the isn't this the
ship? With cars? You know, it's like when your car's not working,
they're just like it's the computer and what the fuck? But you just
bought it's brand new, and it's just like, well, yep, all
right, what what so now? Was because my gas was on, there's
no flap that I had to open for the butter knife, and so he's
like, it's just not working it's just a defective dryer. I was like,
it's so weird because it worked the first time. Then, you know,
so then he plugs a new one in. It's working, you know,
and he leaves, And of course I'm nervous for like the first like
four loads of dryer I did, because I'm like, oh, now is
the one that's not going to be hot anymore? Right? But no,
it's still hot, so it's work. It works fine. Yeah, well,
at least you have that. Our air conditioning has gone out. No
no, no, no, no, no, yes, yea, I
have a great ac company. Well we have turned a lot of friends onto
that. Yeah, nest Or Lopez No, no, no, Entertech,
Yeah, it's the company that we use. Oh really E N E.
R T E K Entertech, that Russian guy, mom I heard that were
anyway, well called them. They were able to come out today. Of
course they're like the fan is burned out and we're gonna have to order another
fan. This happened to me before we got our newer unit. Yeah the
motor, right, the motor yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, so we
have to order another. But at least the air is working in the bedrooms.
How's that? Oh? Because you have separate unit. We have like
different zones. So the kid's bedroom, my bedroom works, but the kitchen,
the living room no no air, So it's very hot. You got
to stay in your room. Stayed in our room. Over the weekend,
we had open house Saturday and Sunday. Oh at the house. Oh no,
which in the in the heat. Yeah, and they eat and our
poor realtor was like people were walking in the house thinking they were gonna get
a blastical there and they're like it was like a wall of heat. And
he was like, we're gonna have to get this fixed. Yeah. So
yeah, but we're gonna it's hopefully it'll be done by the end this week.
I don't know, we'll see. I mean, it shouldn't be a
big deal to just to fix a motor. They have to order the parts,
that's like I said, or don't you guys have a warehouse with the
parts in it? Always got to order the parts Amazon? Yea, like
yeah, exactly, get it ship the next day. Yeah yeah, no,
No, it's gonna take a couple of days. They have to order
the parts. Why are these parts always so like I don't want to say,
but yeah, exotic, Like what Why can't it just be a normal
part. Don't a lot of acs use the same thing. These motors all
use similar parts, right, What do you have to say about that?
Yeah? Why not? Oh? Kaylin, I met Klyn's daughters over the
weekend. Oh my goodness, should we do it? Add and then you
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off your first order. So, so, whent to you didn't go?
I didn't I couldn't go. Yeah, how Yeah, you went on a
trip. I was going to go on a trip and then I didn't go
on a trip at the last minute because my foot has been really bothering me
and I was like, this is just not going to It's not what the
doctor wanted me to do. He wanted me to stay home and keep my
foot walk around. It domes short a little bit, and I'm supposed to
be in the boot for at least one more week. So anyway, I
was not able to do stuff. But you guys went. I did send
a gift. Yes, yes, I went to Patrick's baby shower the Little
Boy on the way so cute at Laurel Tavern and it was one hundred and
eighty degrees. But the nice thing about the place was they had the misters.
It was like being in a jungle for it was like the mists were
going like rainfort, being in the rainfort. So it was very cool.
And a lot of people showed up. I think more people that came to
his baby shower then came to this barbecue. Wow, it was packed.
There was a lot of people. Yeah, and it was at a bar,
yes, right, yeah, so we're there little kids there where Kaitlin's
Well, it was like an outdoor Yeah. It's it's like Patrick's favorite bar
that he's always gone to. And the inside of it. I've always hated
this bar because the inside it's like super thin and every time I goes just
so packed, and there's people everywhere. And when he told me, I
was like, you're gonna have a baby shower at this place? But I
guess during COVID they essentially took their parking lot and made it like a patio
area. Oh yeah, so it's outdoors and that was really nice. And
so there was a lot of room and stuff out, a lot of kids,
yeah yeah, and dogs. Were they drinking the kids were? Yeah?
His daughter how to drive them home? Now there who was there?
Now? Dylan and his wife Kaylin and his daughters. Was so they were
so cute girls. They were so cute. They had fun with Elliott.
They looked just like Klin. Really, they like Mini Kaylin and Minnie Klin
number two. Like they're so cute. I mean I was four, I
no joke. That's like already personality plays right there. And and Patrick's daughter
is same age, a little younger. But yeah, she recognized when I
because I see her all the time when I'm here, right, So when
I walked in, she ran up. I felt so honored. She ran
up to me, gave me a big dog. She's so cute. And
then I saw Kaylin's daughters and they looked just like then they were very well
behaved, like you were, like, they're like they're little terrors, Like,
no, they were very sweet. Yeah, they're they're pretty well.
They did good that day, Yeah, they did good. Yeah, considering
it was pretty hot and it was you know, but it was fun.
You could Kaylin's daughters. This is what I'm wondering, Like, are they
really terrors or are you not used to having kids? Because I feel like
most kids are not like naturally, like just super quiet and like non argumented.
I don't think they're terrors. They just tend to wind each other up
when they're home playing with each other, So they'll mess with each other and
they'll purposely make the other one like cry and tease them. And so when
they're home they tend to wind each other up. But when they're out and
you know, they have Elliott to play with and iPad, if it comes
to that, then yeah we can we can manage that. Yeah, I
can see that. But they were really sweet. They were very nice and
very cute. So are they better one on one when your girls? Are
they better one on one? Like when you're just with one of them,
that's pretty rare. Um, Well, you've been having some Blake time will
like you take Blake to the aquarium. Yeah, I mean I guess so.
Yeah, they're I mean they're usually pretty good. They're compared to how
I was as a as a child. They're angels. So do they have
full blown, like meltdown temper tantrums though, or you cannot get them to
stop crying and screaming. That's what Sadie. Sadie used to do that,
Yeah, like full on, just like Slander used to do that too.
To be honest with you, like sometimes preschool age, he get into a
fight with one of his friends and then just like go in his room and
scream and cry and go nobody understands me, nobody loves me. It's like,
oh, like I know that a heartbreaking I know. Now look at
him. He's mister hilarious too. On his improv I was like, what's
up, squad. I mean, they do grow out of it, But
so your girls don't do that. Blake will like start to do it.
But we have this thing called the thinking chair in their room, and Blake
does not like being on the thinking chair. So as soon as we send
her there, it take It only takes a few minutes for her to calm
down, and I can go in there. The only time Isla does it
is when she gets at all her like even just a little scratch, she
flips and then there's really no kind of calming her down. Yeah, it's
very dramatic. Yeah, I remember when when the kids were a little watching
like Nanny nine one one, oh yeah, Nanny Joe. Yeah, and
then she'd be like okay, like they'd be the kids would just be insane,
right, and then she'd be like, okay, we're gonna put you
in the time out and then you know, the kid would be like fuck
off, like I'm not going the time out chair. And then it'd just
be like carrier back to the time out chair sitter there, carry her back
to the time out chair sitter. Then the kid would get up and wander
away again, and I'd be like, there's just I mean, my kids
would just be feral, like I'm sorry, there's just no way I would
do that. Forty times. I stuck. Who has that kind of patience?
Yeah? This is why I never had a puppy, right, you
know, because if I had, if I got a dog as a puppy,
that dog would still be peeing on the rug. Yes, I know.
Sonny watches that nine one one nanny thing and he's like, well,
we ever like that? And I was like, oh, you know,
you know, I mean, you'd have your moments, but they would never
like they would. One would get upset, the other I want to shut
up. For some reason with Sonny and Italia, Ron would get upset and
then the other one would. You know. I don't know how that worked
out, but um, but yeah, like yeah, I then like Phil
is another issue, who you know just got over his his infection infection.
Yes, he's got all better. Uh. Last night an Italian I went,
I haven't seen Italian like a week. She's been with her friends in
Newport. She came home. I was like, let's watch a movie together.
So we were watching Air with Michael. Yeah, about with Matt Damon.
Okay, so we started off, Yes, so we will what's his
name? Oh? Um, what's his name? Oh? What's his face?
So I love? Yeah, Jason Bateman Yeah and Will what's the end?
He's in it too? You know from Stepbrothers. F Yeah, isn't
he in the two? No, he's not in it. He doesn't even
have his No, Jay Moore's in it off. Okay, all right,
this is why there should be a cap on how old you should beat a
podcast high now right, so okay, so let me know what you would
do. Was like, not even amused anymore. He's just like, um,
all right. So we're watching the movie, right, and first of
all, we're in the theater. I open up like I'm looking for a
blanket. I open up the thing and I find like teeth whitening whatever kit
under the So I'm like, why is this put? You know now because
people are seeing the open house with people shoving things in drawers. So I
take it out and I leave it on the thing. This morning I go
down there, it's torn apart by Phil. Oh no, he ate the
gel of a teeth whitening or his teeth like super just laying next to me,
smiled at me, and it went ding. It made the audible sound.
I was like, what, Phil, Your your breath smells good too?
What the fuck? Fell like, Oh my god? I know.
Did you have to take him in? No? I'm just like, well,
he's gonna have a stomach ache and he didn't eat that much but he
ate something. Oh what happened? I know he does. He has that
thing that people get that pikea or whatever where you want to like eat dirt
or I think so, I mean, I know, like he's missing sucking
a rock. Yeah yeah, because I've never heard of that. I know
that would be's like, we'll eat nothing. First of all, she'll turn
her nose up if you try to give her like a vegetable. She'll be
like, excuse me, you don't have a hot dog somewhere? Like I
know, I know, hope it's just out. I know. So we're
watching the movie last night. Okay, so tell me what you would.
So Natalia stops the movie. She's like, wait, mom. She goes.
My friend from volleyball is asking if she this is like eight thirty and
on a Sunday night, asking if she can come over and spend the night.
I was like, I know that, I know her. Let's call
her Alice. Okay, why she well, it is the summer though,
it is, but she's one year older than Natalia and she's going off to
college in like a month. Oh okay. Her parents are divorced. Her
mom her dad lives in Florida. Her mom sold the house out here and
bought a place in Bali in Bali. Yeah, okay, Bally okay,
yes. And then so her daughter is just kind of like staying at there's
a friend's house who she's supposed to be staying at, but they're out of
town. So she's been alone for like a week and she's just yeah and
Sanitiza, can she come home? Like she's alone? And I was like,
is her mom going to come back here to like help her go to
college? No? What she like set her up. She's going off to
college which is in Texas. How's she getting there? I don't know the
details, but she's not coming back like she's gone. Oh, And I'm
like, what the fuck? So it's like, yes, she can come
now I'm over compensating, like, oh my god, let me make the
bed for her. Let me tell her she can stay as long as she
wants, Like you know, I'm making a bed up for her in the
other room. I love these people online commenting about our parenting, which we
exactly like our Patreon this week right, well, like you going to see
Bruce Springsteen, this bitch is moving to Bali. Yeah, leaving her kids
out, left her daughter Like I don't think we would do that. You
couldn't pay me to do that. I would not leave, No fucking way,
I'm gonna buy Sonny by Natalia. You're on your own and yeah,
yeah, not doing me right. But like she's okay, So she does
have a place to stay, but the family's been gone. She's been alone.
They're gone for like the month of July on a family vacation. So
where did they put her? They told her, like, she could stay
at the house. She's alone, but by herself. She's by herself.
She has an older sibling who's off to college. He's gone, and so
she's just what if there's an earthquake where she gets in a car accident?
I mean a million things like what's what? Where's like why? I don't
get it. So I was like, uh, you know, so then
I was really into the movie. But then we had to stop the movie
because her friend was coming over anyway, So couldn't she has a car the
front She does have a car, okay, so you couldn't just keep watching
the movie while she was on her way. Well we did, and then
she got there and I had to stop. I mean, you know,
Nantali's like, we'll watch it another night because they let's see how that goes
but whatever. But yeah, I don't know. I just was like,
why I can't I can't imagine. I wouldn't do that. Like so I
told Na, tell you she can stay as long as she wants, you
know. And then n Teali gets up this morning go work out and leaves
her at the house. So I'm like, I'm making breakfast? You should
I like, does she want breakfast? And she was like, I got
awkward? I know, like you know, and then Sonny's like, what's
she doing here? You know, I don't know. It's just it's just
weird. I get it. So she's still there right now. She did
leave, but I don't know if she's coming back. Oh I don't know.
That's so interest, that's so yeah, Yeah, that's a little awkward.
Yeah. Would you do that with Elbie moved to BALI? Well,
no, I mean, if Elbie had a friend who wanted to stay with
us, I don't know because I don't where would she I mean, I
know, but would you move and leave Elby on her? Yeah? You
know me, I'm not codependent with my kids at all. I'd be like,
you guys are gonna be great, You're gonna do great, just like
fend for yourself. You're resourceful, right, You're used to making your own
lunches and doing your own laws. You're cream cheese. Elby didn't know how
to put cream cheese on a bagel until she was nine. I'm definitely not
moving to Bali while she's now right now. Yeah, so elb Elbie's starting
a class today, Well suppose she's supposed to be. This is where I'm
really trying to step up and be. I'm I'm proud of myself. I
think I have had more hard conversations with Elbi in the past year than I
have in our entire history of mom daughter. You know, I've had to
have conversations with her where I'm like, I cannot let you fuck up your
future. Yeah. So I know it sucks, It really sucks, and
I feel for you, but like it could be worse, right, Like
life could be worse. You just haven't experienced worse. But guess what,
You're fucking lucky. You know. Other people have like lots of hardships.
They stumble through life and like hope things work out, and they buy cars
that already have like ninety five miles on them. That's a yellow GLC with
rust through the floor of the car that they have to stop Fred Flintstone style.
Hi, yeah, ain't. Nobody was like, oh, I want
to make sure that you have safety features on your car. My mom did
not give a fuck about safety features. She was like, you can buy
your own car. Have a good day. I'm not even going to co
sign on it, bitch. Have fun. And I bought a car for
a thousand dollars and I financed it. I financed a thousand dollars, Lynette,
I did not have a thousand dollars to buy a car, of course
not. I only had like six hundred dollars when I moved from Massachusetts to
LA on my own, and my mom thought she was being a big hero
and gave me three hundred added three hundred to the kittie at nine hundred dollars
and at Mazda yellow banana yellow Maza GLC with almost one hundred thousand miles on
it to drive across the country because my friend, who was younger than me,
didn't have a car at all, So I was in the catbird seat
with my Mazda, my shitty Mazda. Nobody was like, oh, you
don't have a backup camera, like you know no, And now John and
I are like, we're trying to get LB a card where it's got to
have all the way to safety features, and I'm like, wow, we
are not teaching a lot of resiliency. So I got to teach a resiliency
in other ways, like saying, hey, if going to Pierce is your
only option right now, then you're gonna do that and you're going to kick
ass and you're and I'm going to sit here with you while you register for
classes because if I don't, you're not doing it. So that's how I've
been handling things. And there have been some really tense conversations where she cries
and I go, I understand you're sad, but we're doing it anyway.
So I have had to step up and it sucks and it's hard, but
anyway, at some point I'm walking that line where I'm like, okay,
but now her class, I know her class. It's an asynchronous you know,
it's an online class, right, So I'm like, it started today.
So now I'm like, do I say to her, have you even
open have you looked to see how much work there is? Because it's a
so it's a summer class, and it's only half of the summer. It's
like the back half of the summer. So by the time the fall semester
starts, the class is over. It's like a month. So it's a
lot of it's an honors class, and there's a lot of work crammed into
that one month. So I'm like, when do I start in on?
Have you started any of the work? Have you looked at the work?
Is it going to be a lot of work because you're gonna want to spend
time with your boyfriend when he gets back from his trip, right, yeah,
you got it. Yeah. Parenting is harder, by the way,
calin now in certain ways with an eighteen year old than it was when when
they were babies. I shouldn't say that it was exhausting. What am I
talking about? Yea, it was physically and mentally exhausting. Yeah, but
now it's more like, oh, like I have to think for them.
I had a well you have a thing for them back then too, you
know what, I take that back. It's just it's different. It's still
challenging. It's just different. It's very different, and you know what it's
it is easier in some ways, but you worry like that they could fuck
up there they there, they have bigger decisions to make, which could be
more right, life changing. But at this thing, you have to let
them make decisions too, and you have to let them make mistakes. Right.
But I'm like, if this, if Elby makes a mistake and doesn't
do her work, it's a mistake that will cost her another year at home.
Right. I know she doesn't want that. Yeah, but she is
old enough to understand right consequences, right, Yeah. Yeah, I just
thought through this problem and realize that I'm gonna not say anything. She's going
to figure it out. I don't know what I am going to say something
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you know what I'm doing now, Yeah, you're Our lives are so funny
because so LB is a year and a half older than your twins, right,
and my twins are a year and a half younger, because my kids
are exactly three years apart and your kids are exactly in the middle, right,
so June, because my kids will be a year older in November.
So I have fifteen year old and an eighteen year old. Yeah, yeah,
and years just turned seventeen, right, okay, so mine or fifteen
and a half and eighteen and a half. So your kids went through the
driving, the getting the permits, and now my kids are like, are
they doing that? And you would be surprised because the one who's way more
on it is Sadie. Really yeah, so Sadie. So they both signed
up for Drivers Direct ELBI did hers like dragged it out over months just to
just to go in and take the learners permit. But it was also COVID,
so it was really really hard to get appointments to go in to take
the permit test. So she was dragging her feet. And Elbie is such
a rule follower. Do you remember back in the day, I would come
in and tell you the funny stuff that was on the that she was learning
about. Yeah, Like it was like, what do you do if somebody
cuts you off on the road? Do you flip that dog them? Yeah?
Do you follow them right? Or do you just let it roll off
your back and keep driving safely? It's like, oh, what do I
pick? That's crazy? So, um, Elbi helped. Elbie was like,
Sadie Zander, you guys don't need to go through the pain that I
went through. This whole thing is really stupid. Just speed through it and
take the quizzes at the end. It's all all of its common sense.
So Sadie did. She finished her thing in like a day, I mean
because Elbie helped her, and then she got her so she got her certificate
in the mail. So now so then she signed up for that. I
think I told you to tell him to Talia to do this. The quizlets,
the DMV test sample tests. You pay for it. It's like four
ninety nine if anyone out there is listening. Yeah, and in the same
boat. They have these apps that you download to your phone and then you
can take these tests. What was really funny because I was Sadie came in
and she wanted me to help her take the tests. And I'm like,
okay, but like, if you're going to go in and have to take
the permit test, you do that on your own, right, And oh
my god it Sadie has more trouble with like kind of common sense, like
you know when your kids look to you for every Like she'll read me the
question and then she'll be like I don't really get it. Yeah, and
I'm like, okay, all right. Picture She's like, what So it's
a highway and it's got two two lanes And I'm like, yeah, okay,
so there's freeway. I'm like, we are starting from freaking scratch with
this kid, right right right, there's a there's there's freeways that's its own
thing with exits and you know, and then there's highways could be also another
name for free way. Then I was realizing this ship is kind of confusing.
Yeah. Then I was getting some of them that I'm like, oh,
and then she was like okay, and then she she's like no,
it's not that I'm like what one of them? Here's one of the questions,
when should you drive with your parking lights on? And I'm like,
well, my so my first instinct is like, well never. But then
I was like, wait, well, by parking lights, do they mean
those low lights that some cars have that are not when you turn on your
headlights. So one of the answers was like a half hour before sunset and
half hour after sunset, which is when you turn on your headlights half hour
before. Then I was like, I'm all thought up, like if it's
dark at I turn on my headlights, I don't know right. Well,
it was a trick question because it was like never, you don't drive with
your parking lights on? But I'm like, what cars have official parking lights
that? Right? Yeah? So I was like okay, And then there
were like at least four other ones that I was like, oh, it's
this for sure, Sadie, let's just use common sense. I think it
through and I'm telling her and she's like, okay, so this answer,
and I'm like, yes, wrong, like something kind of simple. Oh.
One of them was like oh, here was a good one. Parking
When which of these can you never park. It was like in a bike
lane unless it's posted in a something else. And then once diagonally when there's
diagonally parking in a diagonally patterned space, and I was like, what diagonally
patterns space? I'm gonna need a picture I talk about. And then I
was like, well, yeah, you could park diagonally if you're in a
parking lot where there's diagonal spaces right right right, Well there was a picture
I had. Oh no, there wasn't a picture. I googled it because
the answer was I guess you can park in a bike lane if it doesn't
matter if there's a signpost it or not whatever. And then the other one
you can park there. I don't know what it was. And then the
you know when you're in a parking lot and there's a space that you're like,
oh, I wish that was a parking space because it drew him from
my car, but there's all these white lines right through it because it's not
a parking space. But I was like, well, I didn't know you
meant that. You should have showed a picture. What I googled diagonally patterned
parking space and then I thought I was like Oh, well, why didn't
you say that? Yeah. Yeah, there was a lot of trick questions,
which is why Natalia took forever to pass our thing. Right, Sonny
passed on, which is Sonny's going next this next week to take his driver's
right, right, and then he'll have his license because he's been driving around.
He's been driving me. He's been driving me through the city. Like
I told him, you know, I have an appointment at drive bar.
You want to drive me? And like it's gonna be trafficky, and he's
like yeah, and he's he's just been he's been driving a lot with me,
and um, yeah, he's gonna get his license like next week.
Well, Natalia had already driven a ton before she got her permit, right,
but she's now has to wait until like October, so she's eligible to
take the driving test, right, Sonny because he passed it on the first
Now he's so Sadie's going to be ahead of Xander. Because I was like,
Okay, Sadie did her thing. I was like, Xander, do
your things. He says he does. I'm sure he does, but I
was like, well, then finish your thing and he's like okay, I
will, Yeah, and he's like playing a bunch of video games and not
doing it. Meanwhile, Sadie's like, Mom, can you tell Xander to
please do his driving test? So I said, well, no, not
really, but I'll tell you what. I'll just take you for. I'll
take you for you're ready, I don't care. I'll go twice. Yeah,
I'm doing now. I had to take them from my multiple schedule of
going to target or not doing anything right now. So I told Sadie today's
Monday. I told Sadie we'd go next Monday. I told her just keep
taking the because I had to nurse her through all these questions today because each
one felt like a giant stumper to her. You know she does. She
didn't like believe in herself. I was like, Okay, a lot of
these are common sense. Here's some things to know. Pedestrians always have the
right away, always, always, always, any question. They're going to
ask you this question in a lot of different ways. Okay, but what
if the pedestrian is like, wants to cross through the crosswalk and you know,
against the red light. I'm like, it doesn't matter. The pedestrian
always has the right away because you are in a car. So they're not
going to hurt you, but you can hurt them. So you just always
no matter what kind of crazy fucking crap her up to. I told Natalia
about member Rebecca Gayheart, Yeah what happened to her. I was just telling
her today, the actress Rebecca Yea killed the little boy by accident because she
was going through a residential street and she stopped behind another car that was stopped
at a stop at a stop sign, but he wasn't moving, and she
was irritated that that car wasn't moving, so she went around and hit a
kid and killed the kid. And I told Natalia that, I go,
let that be a lesson. She's like, wow, really, I let
that be a lesson because I know you, Natalia, you you you you
know she doesn't have patience right like her mom, right, So do not
do any shit like that. So yeah, I give her a little I
scare her. You know. It's funny Elby being like the rule follower.
The other day, John shows me this a picture from his phone, which
was Our Life three sixty that said, on Elbie's last trip where she was
driving, her top speed was one hundred and twenty two miles per hour.
And I was like what wow. But my first thing I said was that
that has to be a mistake because it's Elby, Like Elbie's not going to
drive over like eighty, Like that's just not She's too nervous. She just
wouldn't do that. And I was like, I don't even think our stupid
Tiguan goes that fast, right. So John looks it up and figures out
that the Tiguan tops out at one hundred and twenty five, so it is
possible that she was going one hundred and twenty two. But I was like,
but where in Los Angeles? Where would she be going one hundred and
twenty two? Like, yeah, you're in traffic everywhere, there's nowhere to
go one hundred and twenty two. So he was like, yeah, that's
true, but we should still ask her about it. And I was like,
of course, we'll ask her about it. And of course she was
like what of course not, Like that's insane. Where would I do that?
When would I do that? Here's where I went, and here's what
the speed limit was, and like and she's like no, And then we
all looked up how that can make a mistake and apparently I don't know.
This is what she says, because her phone was dead for a part of
this trip, but it registered how far she was going. It averaged her
speed. But because she I don't know, I don't know, but all
I can tell you is that she was not going one hundred and twenty two.
But of course I was like, listen, I'm just going to tell
you something. If you were thinking ever of going that fast and you get
a ticket for that, you will not be driving, and you will not
be driving my car, you will not be driving our vehicles, and you
will probably lose your license for that, because I think that's a Yeah,
it's not a felony, but it's worse than a mystery. It's like an
actual crime, you know, when you can't go to traffic court for that.
If you're going over like I want to say, over ninety, Like
there's an actual Yeah, it many points against your license, you know,
and you she wouldn't be able to drive. So she was just like,
I would never do that anyway. It's me. I'm like, yeah,
I know, yeah, where did he see that report on Life three sixty?
Do you use? Like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Well he has it sets so that he can see there. Yeah yeah,
and all that stuff. Yeah yeah. Anyway, all right, um,
let's give some shout outs before we go. Like our friend Adam Learner
speaking of cars, speaking a car, Adam is trying to find me a
car for LB, find us a car for her, and she's going to
be home, and we don't want to share our car with her anymore.
She's a speed demon. She's a speed demon. We got to find her
a car that goes at least one hundred and thirty miles per hour. And
anyway, Adam can find you a car, especially if you're in California.
Anywhere in California, please hit him up. He will get you the best
deal and it's free three one zero nine nine eight seven zero for eight.
He's a car broker. His website is Adam's Got a Car dot com.
Also willman Frieda. If you're in Palm Springs or Palm Desert, it's hot,
go to where the air conditioning is and the food is delicious, phenomenal.
They have the best they have holiday menus, they have the best brunch.
They have churo waffles. Oh my god, my mouth is watering and
thinking about their food. So do that. Also, the family Skeptical is
a podcast about raising your kids with no religion, which is not really that
scandalous if you think about it, but some people feel like, should I
do that? Should I be raising them Christian or Jewish or religious? Well,
go to the Family Skeptical and listen and you'll feel better about what you're
doing. Yeah, The Family Skeptical. They have a new show out every
three weeks. Also Basic Becky. Do you want a girl? Yeah?
You want like a T shirt? Do you want a mouth pause, a
blanket, a sock? She could probably do saw Yeah, funny saying on
it. She can make you anything you want. Just tell her what you
wanted to say on the T shirt and she'll make it for you. I
think that's so cool. Yeah, hit her up just basic Becky dot com
or Basic Becky on Facebook. And last, but not least, Maren is
our girl and she has a store called Sugar Skull with her husband. It's
a bakery and gift shop. It's on Kawaii, so if you're vacationing there
you can check them out, or you can like and follow their Instagram page
at sugar Skull eight oh eight and get fifteen percent off if you use the
code fcoll. Nice. Yeah, I love you guys. You have an
announcement to make, Oh we sure do. Why don't you make it for
us? Kalin? So last week I tease that I was putting something together,
and we now have a new social media pages across all the different social
medias. So if you just go to at fcol podcast on Instagram, Twitter,
TikTok, and Facebook, they're all new social media pages where we're going
to be posting clips of the show multiple times a week. Follow us at
f cool podcast on all social medias and watch our our our clips up right
now. Yeah, yeah, we have Meredith up there right, I'm gonna
yeah, I'm gonna reput her up there and tag it. I was just
messing around with the settings, but I got just four funny clips of YouTube
from the past like three weeks, and then I got Meredith, I got
some Dylan Patrick. One's coming, so yeah, I'm gonna have yeah fighting
I love it. Yeah, So fcol podcast and that's across everything everything,
and it's like, yeah, it's gonna be our new kind of like public
Facebook page, so you know, we're not going to post any of the
clips or anything, and our reel atend page. We're just going to post
it all to Facebook and yeah, Instagram, TikTok, Twitter like whatever you
use like that, because we had a Facebook page that we don't know what
it's called, but it's now defunct. We haven't posted on it in years,
but it has a ton of followers, so we want you all to
move over to that other Facebook. Yeah, and just like the page and
including Instagram as well. We're moving over the Instagram page to fcol podcast now.
So yeah, I hate that over as well, and I'll put posts
on the Facebook. And the old Facebook and Instagram page is saying hey go
go follow us at the new one, but uh yeah, just do it
right, okay, all right, thanks everybody. You're a parag don't have
it up that ale.