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For the thousands in attendance and the
millions watching around the world. This is

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00:00:06,719 --> 00:00:12,960
the many bit Stiltoe corn is alive
and kicking mun over here. I'll hit

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but your ass a couple of times. You you know what I'm saying.

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This brother breaking on the forty yard
but this brother, Come on, sid,

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I hope I didn't kiss off.
Jesus you call that a penalty's number

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one? That was number one.
It's the La Clippers. Shut up,

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you're staying it for all people.
I would get a pregnant They just called

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in and hangs up. Your mother
fucker that can kiss me off? Are

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you? Are you in the shower
house totally in the show. Yeah,

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he's not a coach. Can give
me James stupid. You're a super idiot.

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For get soup up tight over literally
to clearly why I will lie for

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attention my life at start. Y'all
you're coming, Hi, everybody, Welcome

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00:01:04,159 --> 00:01:11,000
to FUNCHUK Sports where winners win.
We are winning. Everybody's winning. We're

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all talking about it. I don't
even want Happy New Year sport to secay.

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I can't talk about don't even ask, don't even ask. I don't

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even knew it. One minute in
That's exactly what I said, but it's

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always from the Midwest. They called
the West teams. Jason Tibo, Hi,

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guys, it's me the team.
Happy New Year. Congratulations Georgia,

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Congratulations to everyone in the World Series, and congratulations to all the Fantasy winners.

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Well everything, everything has happened since
we last record. Congratulations to everybody.

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Yeah, hope your computer survived Y
two k all that shit? And

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how about that fucking insurgency thing?
Hu, guys, yeah, big time,

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cly I really, I really think
Nixon will get us out of Vietnam,

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though I believe that he said he's
got secret Vietnam? Is that a

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thing? Now? We went to
work. How are you guys doing,

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Johnny? How was your trip to
Johnny? Can we see him before we

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get into sports? Did you you
gotta know about this? Johnny? Can

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we talk about your mother's sleepwalking team? Oh yeah, yeah, we've talked

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about before probably, But yeah,
she's got like we've talked about this show.

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She just wakes up in the middle
of a fields asking a tree if

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you're my mommy. Yeah, she
just got really bad. She has night

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terrors and sleepwalking night terrors or when
you like wake up screaming really intense dreams

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all the time, and sleepwalking.
So she she just runs around the house,

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you know, like screaming, and
she's driven away once or maybe twice,

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I can't remember. Thankfully we lived. Yeah, sleep driving, dude.

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Yeah, but she had a sleep
study done while I was back,

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and uh and now that's what they're
treating her for, like sleep apnea,

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and it seems to be getting better. So anyway, but yeah, dude,

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she used to knock on my I
think we talked about this, but

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she used to knock on my door, and she was so like it was

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almost like a different personality because she
was so aware while asleep that she knew

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as a kid to get me to
open the door, she had to pretend

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to not be asleep, so she
would she would knock on the door and

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go, John, John, just
let me in. I'm not I'm not

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asleep. Your sister's drowning. Your
sister's drowning. I'm like what I mean,

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just shit. That's the kind of
ship she dreams about, dude.

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That's why you are how you are. That's one of the reasons how many

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to you that scary ship because you
wake up in the middle of the night

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as an old lady stating in a
nightgown. At the end, I locked

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the door, dude, That's why
I started locking my door. Yeah,

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yeah, I'm sucking. I'd be
like, no, crazy, no mom,

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crazy mom, that's crazy mom.
I got another announcement from when I

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was back home to Jason. We
talked about this on broken simulation. But

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my nephew broke my uh no ship
for a week record. Can you believe

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that he did ten days without taking
a dump? My nephew, he beat

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your fucking NASA space camp record.
Did Yeah? He beat it by by

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space poos for four days. Was
he also a space half you know?

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He? Uh? I don't know. He just didn't ship for like ten

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days. It was crazy. He
had like a or something they got you

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got airtight buttholes. You go like
a fucking like a family, but you

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know, like family members, like
I'll share like a Netflix password. You

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fucking bid day, fucking family scripted
the MERRX. Yeah, they just send

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it by the truck of what else
is up? Guys? So good?

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Thank you. Yeah, I'm doing
great things for asking. Thank you,

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guys, you're much for asking.
Sam your hair's shortest ship, bro you

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got that fucking I know. But
I'll talk about his hair. Dude,

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he's self conscious about it. He's
so he's been like that. Somebody's talking

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shit about him wearing a hat too. I never knew somebody I never knew.

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I not know the person by just
I just didn't want to wear a

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hat. I've been wearing it forever
now. Johnny sam Boys wears hats like

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he's about to be like a producer
of a rap video. And Johnny always

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wears a hat like he just came
out of the woods lost. Yeah,

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dude, this hat. My girlfriend
hates this. I've had this. Are

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you wearing it? If your girlfriend
hates it's like my I wear it in

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the house, his lucky fishing lure
hat. It's got all his fishing lures

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in there. We've got this down
lighting in the house and it gets in

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my I don't know, fucks me
up. So I wear a hat.

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So just so you know. And
Dana hasn't heard this, but I'm going

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to announce it Herebody knows about this, her pies. But I bought two

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tickets James possibly beating the Karema du
Jabbars thing on March ninth, I have

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to go. I need to go
seven days. Is it March ninth or

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it's February February ninth, February ninth, So let's wait from today, so

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we have if he doesn't beat if
he see I think he wants to do

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it in LA because they will have
more bang. Tell me this, Sam,

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Can you imagine a world where he's
about to break it and like whatever

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the game before that is New Orleans
or whatever he's about, or like Oklahoma

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City or wherever the fuck he's supposed
to be, and it's clear it's like

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ten points away he's gonna break it. Can you imagine a world where they

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rest end that game like I do? Because he already took a game off.

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He already took a game off in
Brooklyn, So it's like, are

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you where? Do you where?
Would it be cooler to break the thing

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at the Staples Center in LA or
OKAYC Yeah? I mean for the league

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too. NBA wants that because they
want to and you know that. Do

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you think they're gonna apply kaream to
Oka? See? Okay? See,

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by the way, we'll see what
happens. So you've got tickets for what

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game? The February ninth, three
games February ninth. He he needs twenty

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six, he needs sixty three points, So, I mean games is that

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left between them? It says project
three games. So let's look at this.

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Let's look out my games has left
before that. I think it's just

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New Orleans. I think it's just
New Orleans and Okay, see left.

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Oh dude, Yeah, you're you're
gonna be close. Dude, it's gonna

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be like right at the beginning of
that game. You have a ticket too,

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if if you get it, because
he's probably you know, what's what's

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the averaging twenty something? What is
it? Yeah? Yeah, yeah,

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let me see what right now?
Yeah, there's two games, two games

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between the game I have and and
New Orleans and oksey, if he scores

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thirty points, he's averaging. He's
averaging thirty a game. So you're right

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on it, dude. Yeah,
well, you better hope that he scores

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like fucking thirty eight on that first
game. You better hope they sit his

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fucking ass, see them sitting his
ass too, and that the Lakers aren't

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playing that bad right now and they
are making a tiny little run for uh.

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I mean, he's averaging thirty points
a game and he's past two years.

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That's so crazy. He's had to
do a lot more with these teams.

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I know, but that's crazy.
Well you put them together, but

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it's super it's just super interesting because
like there's some real deals out there that

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they could get for Russell Westbrook and
they're not doing it. So I'm like,

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so let's let's just be honest here. Let's say they just want to

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get Lebron to pass this mark.
That's the big thing. It's the big

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celebration, Lebron James past cream.
Nobody thought it was gonna happen. Happens,

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right, Yeah, that's the big
change. That's the big thing.

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But they don't do anything. Russell
Westbrook gets off the books after this year,

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00:09:15,320 --> 00:09:18,799
and then Lebron James going, hey, dude, I don't always the

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rest of my time on this shit
ass Lakers team. You could see Lebron

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force a way out. It's actually
the easiest way out for them out of

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this whatever's going on. Then taking
on all these bad contracts to make Lebron

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happy, who could still ask out
at the end of the season, is

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to just get him to want to
ask out, Just be like, dude,

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beg goat, we'll send you anywhere
for picks. Just as he kind

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of wants to leave already, though
I feel like he still leave it.

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I mean, I don't think they'd
have to, but he just signed a

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contract so they can't, and I
guarantee you got a no trade clause.

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So they need him to ask the
out, and the best way to do

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that is to just go. We're
not winning a championship this year. There's

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no peace coming to us that is
going to help us win this championship.

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We don't have enough outside shooters,
so unless Steph Curry or Kevin Durant or

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anybody like that comes, it's like
it's just not happening. Maybe you might

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have a you might if you could
just beg the Portland Trailblazers to let Damian

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Lillard go, that's your only hope. But he doesn't want to leave,

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and they've kind of want him.
I mean, that's talking you. You

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who talked about it to me as
well about Westbrook Fur. You know,

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Levine to Chicago and a billion of
other fucking things. But I don't know

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why Chicago want to do that unless
Levine just doesn't happen there. I know,

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I don't blow it up. Bro. That's the only reason that they've

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done it too late in the season, because the only reason to blow it

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up is to try to get that
seven foot four NBA kid. I mean,

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I bolls are five hundred. Well, there's also this idea that Levine

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John but I'm working on the I
was just being silly. Uh. There's

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also this idea that Levine's numbers dot
boy, that I was being I was

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doing the joke. You don't get
to do the joke because I just did

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00:11:16,799 --> 00:11:22,679
the joke. You were doing it
the Levine there's this idea that he doesn't

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00:11:22,759 --> 00:11:24,360
his numbers are kind of empty numbers. You know, he's got that kind

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00:11:24,399 --> 00:11:30,120
of label on him. Yeah,
I mean he just shoots too much.

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Yeah, he's never been a team
that was dominating anybody. He's like a

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guy you needed to be, like
the third best guy on your team,

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which if he came here, he
would be if he came to the leading

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the second best guy he's better at. I just's not He's not the guy.

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He's not the guy. He's just
a stat stuff. So anyways,

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I know, you don't want to
talk any NBA right now with the Well,

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00:11:50,159 --> 00:11:52,679
the funny thing is I'm not even
joking. You see all this shit,

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This is just all my punch drunk
notes I've been having since we've been

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00:11:56,200 --> 00:12:01,879
on our hiatus. Yeah, right
after right after did you hear we landed

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00:12:01,919 --> 00:12:07,759
on the moon. It literally says
Sam's thoughts on Lebron breaking Kareem's record.

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Now, I heard Byron Scott say
something that I wrote it down because I

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00:12:11,320 --> 00:12:15,000
wanted to say it to you,
um, and I thought this was a

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00:12:15,039 --> 00:12:18,399
smart way of putting it because you'll
always get the Lebron versus Michael, and

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now that he's about to break this
record, then you get the goat ship

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00:12:22,200 --> 00:12:24,919
coming up. And he brought up
a great point. He goes the difference

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in Lebron and Michael was Jordan didn't
get drafted first. We didn't hear about

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00:12:31,879 --> 00:12:37,440
Jordan all this time we watched Jordan
become great. Lebron was always supposed to

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00:12:37,480 --> 00:12:43,879
be great. Lebron was anointed as
the next guy. So he came in

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00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:48,519
with like he almost can't win it. He never got a champion, never

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00:12:48,559 --> 00:12:50,039
got a championship, never, and
then he got one like, well you

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know he didn't get it in Cleveland. Well then he gets when he coaid

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well, then he's always going to
be in that shadow because we never watched

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00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:05,559
him achieve, we never watched him
really fail. He just kind of waited

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00:13:05,600 --> 00:13:09,639
for him to fail. Well he
did. He he had two series where

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he didn't do well, and that
that to me. That to me,

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00:13:13,240 --> 00:13:16,200
I not defending Lebron but in a
twenty six year career from the age of

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00:13:16,279 --> 00:13:24,120
seventeen. But when you're when you're
getting to this, like the break the

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top five in in in and once
he beats Kareem, I'm gonna go,

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00:13:31,360 --> 00:13:37,399
Okay, he's number one points number
four in assists that that means something.

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Obviously, I'm not gonna sit there
and be like, are you know right?

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00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:50,799
That means something moving up? I'm
about to move in the number six.

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00:13:52,399 --> 00:13:56,919
Larry Bird, you got him passing
Bird, I have him. Well,

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00:13:56,960 --> 00:14:01,879
he's right in there with Kobe,
Kobe burd Um, Will Chamberlain,

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00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:07,600
Bill Russell. Like that group,
like like the second tier of in my

187
00:14:07,679 --> 00:14:13,240
humble opinion, the greatest ever duel
that group. But the guys in the

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00:14:13,279 --> 00:14:18,879
top five to me are just guys
that never had a bad series, always

189
00:14:20,000 --> 00:14:26,559
brought it and even though maybe they
didn't always win, they still were like

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00:14:26,399 --> 00:14:31,480
just they just dominated and that,
and it goes Kareem. It goes Michael

191
00:14:31,519 --> 00:14:35,480
and Kareem one a one bat right
there, bang bang, They're both like

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00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:43,240
the best. Then I go Magic
Johnson. This is where what I'm agreeing

193
00:14:43,279 --> 00:14:46,799
with you about Magic. I don't
know. If I got Kareem and two,

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00:14:46,799 --> 00:14:50,039
if I'm honest, I get out
of that to get everything. But

195
00:14:50,559 --> 00:14:54,559
it's just, you know, I
don't know. I have a hard time

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00:14:56,440 --> 00:15:00,639
with the timelines and the different eras
of the game. Winning gets into this

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00:15:00,679 --> 00:15:03,519
shiit of like, well, you
know what about will Well will its fucking

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00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:07,159
power forward in this area. I
go, Okay, it's hard for me

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00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:13,240
to go. I mean, Kareem. I think Magic would do the same

200
00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:18,159
ship Magic always did do. I
think Kareem would be as dominant in a

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00:15:18,279 --> 00:15:24,399
league that has five seven footers on
every team. I would be pretty skinny.

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00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:28,799
Well, I mean, like,
look at this kid that's kin draft.

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He's seven to four and he's thin. Look at I think he would

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have a he would still have a
skyhook, but he would have also other

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facets of the game because he just, dude, you gotta understand something.

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He would go down there and have
three he go three on one, they

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would have everybody. He played in
a league where they didn't even have a

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three pointer. He also played league
the rules for defenders or like drastic is

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different, So you have to remember
that too. They weren't I mean,

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they could do whatever they wanted to
that guy. If you go back and

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watch him banging around stuff, if
you're like, oh my god, how

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would he do here? How they
they dominated the environment they were in.

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So Number four to me is Tim
Duncan and everything that people say outside the

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stats stuffing Duncan that people say about
Lebron Tim Duncan did in a herder in

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00:16:22,679 --> 00:16:30,480
a harder conference. You can't even
compare Lebron Jason's Eastern Conference to what Tim

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00:16:30,559 --> 00:16:33,320
Duncan had to go through to get
all to those finals. It was I

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00:16:33,320 --> 00:16:38,080
mean, like dude, it was
murders row. He's the only reason that

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00:16:37,759 --> 00:16:44,320
that Kobe and Shack didn't have a
bazillion more titles because Tim Duncan and the

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00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:49,600
Spurs were just assassin. He he
did everything Lebron James did in a smaller

220
00:16:49,679 --> 00:16:55,600
market in a harder, harder conference. And then the last one in the

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top five is Shock and we just
don't give shock enough credit for how he

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was Jackson my top five. Ye, dudes, I wouldn't want to rape

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me? Yeah, well, actually
he's probably He's probably in the top three

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if I'm if I'm being real,
well where is He's not that hung so

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00:17:15,559 --> 00:17:18,039
you might want him to. It's
about the weight on top of me more

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than it is. I mean,
Scottie got a fire host. You don't

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want that. You don't know me, Bro, I do want that.

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I want a skinny guy with an
elephant trunk. Fucking That's what I was

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gonna ask Jason who's very last on
that list? Who's the dead last guy

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on the list the people you don't
want to rape you? Who's Brad Williams?

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00:17:41,039 --> 00:17:45,519
Okay, interesting, I don't Red
rebang Sam, Brad Williams been there,

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done that time out. I'm just
but I would say probably Jake of

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athletes, JJ Reddick, Well,
because that wouldn't be rape, that'd be

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00:17:52,960 --> 00:18:02,119
love any any international, uh internationally
recognized ping pong player for just doing athletes?

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Um, so yeah, that's it. I mean Lebron James does move

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up the number six. I don't
know if I got a top ten as

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much as you do on that.
But I do know this. Jordan's one.

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Yeah, Shack's in that top five. Yep, Magic's in that top

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five where you got Kobe, where
you got Kobe Jays. I fucking might

240
00:18:26,119 --> 00:18:33,079
have him in my top five.
Man, he had two on yours.

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I have him in that bottom five
of the top five. I mean at

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the bottom five to ten. Let
me just ask you this straight up.

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But there's seven guys in there.
There's like six or seven guys battling over

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that five. I can't Larry Bird, Bill Russell, Will Chamberlain, uh

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Lebron James, and then um,
who is the other one. It sounds

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00:18:56,599 --> 00:19:00,400
like you got yourself a situation you
might have to suck your way out of.

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00:19:02,839 --> 00:19:08,519
The thing about Kobe. The thing
about Kobe is Kobe had two horrible

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series in the finals, like he
wasn't Jordan, where Jordan showed up every

249
00:19:14,599 --> 00:19:18,039
time. He had two horrible series
and that was against the Pistons where they

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00:19:18,119 --> 00:19:22,480
let Shaq go off, and then
he said, we're gonna just gonna have

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to have Kobe beat us and he
couldn't step up. And then yea was

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yeah, the Boston Celtics, in
which they gifted him the game seven by

253
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sending him to the line like twenty
six like the Lakers, like twenty six

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00:19:37,359 --> 00:19:40,759
times in that second and a half, and only Boston only a couple of

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times. So I have Kobe in
that second half. Lebron James doesn't make

256
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the top five because he's had he
had bad finals where he disappeared and that

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00:19:51,759 --> 00:19:56,680
was against San Antonio. He had
a bad final in Dallas, Dallas,

258
00:19:56,720 --> 00:20:00,319
he had a bad final against remember
he dude, that was the first series

259
00:20:00,359 --> 00:20:04,440
with the heat. He was overwhelming
favorite, disappeared. He had a bad

260
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final his last I think the last
finals against the Warriors with Cleveland, he

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00:20:11,039 --> 00:20:12,799
totally disappeard. You told he was
checked out. I'll tell you that.

262
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Let me ask you this. You
got you got your top four, okay,

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00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:22,279
and just I'm gonna give you I'm
saying you got four of them between

264
00:20:22,839 --> 00:20:33,440
Shack No it's George Jordan's dream Magic
and Tim Duncan. Tim Duncan. So

265
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I'm gonna say this, with this
record coming up right now, for that

266
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fifth spot, I'm gonna give you
two people you have to pick from,

267
00:20:41,079 --> 00:20:44,599
and right now you gotta go gun
to your head. You gotta pick one

268
00:20:44,640 --> 00:20:49,160
and that's it for the fucking next
year, for the fifth spot. Do

269
00:20:49,279 --> 00:21:00,680
you go Lebron or do you go
Kobe Bryant. That's tough one. That's

270
00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:06,000
a tough one because for everybody's record, Sam is actually thinking right now,

271
00:21:06,039 --> 00:21:07,720
if you're just not if you're only
getting audio, he's not on his phone

272
00:21:07,759 --> 00:21:14,440
at all. He's rubbing his chin
like that fucking statue I am. I

273
00:21:14,480 --> 00:21:21,079
can see smoke coming out of his
ears. I think I think that Lebron

274
00:21:21,799 --> 00:21:27,799
was a much more skilled and physical, physically physically gifted player than Lebron.

275
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But I think Kobe wanted to kill
people out there, and he had it.

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He had He was great. He
just was just didn't have the same

277
00:21:41,920 --> 00:21:47,720
fastball that that Michael Jordan. He
just wasn't got He did everything like him,

278
00:21:47,759 --> 00:21:49,160
and you listen to players to play
with him. They thought he was

279
00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:53,960
a killer and he was a psychopath. So if they're so, the whole

280
00:21:55,039 --> 00:21:59,480
question gets through what you basically do
as you little is every you're you're you're

281
00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:06,440
doing this fantasy basketball game in heaven, right, and you had your top

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00:22:07,759 --> 00:22:14,440
leven guys, top twelve guys and
the guards. Okay, Hitler's in there,

283
00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:18,119
but you're picking them at their statistically
greatest season they ever had, Right,

284
00:22:18,839 --> 00:22:23,359
who are you taking? I'm sorry, but I would probably take Lebron

285
00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:32,599
over Kobe. But I would take
Shack over Kobe at their physical primes,

286
00:22:32,640 --> 00:22:38,000
like when they're just murdering people,
young Shack could run and probably cover Kareem

287
00:22:38,400 --> 00:22:42,079
cover Lebron James. You remember how
gifted that guy was when he was still

288
00:22:42,079 --> 00:22:47,319
thin, he was crazy. I
don't know if they'll ever be another.

289
00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:52,000
The closest thing we got to that, the closest thing we have to that

290
00:22:52,559 --> 00:22:57,359
is is Joel Embiid. But he
can't stay healthy and he's not as fast.

291
00:22:57,680 --> 00:23:03,240
Joel Embiid's too slow. Oh,
Shaquille O'Neill was just a murderer,

292
00:23:03,279 --> 00:23:08,920
bro Greek freaks pretty. He's definitely
close. He's big, and he's strong,

293
00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:14,039
and he's athletic. He's he doesn't
have that Kevin Durant kind of lanky

294
00:23:14,079 --> 00:23:18,440
body. He's got a fucking up
a big frame on him. Yeah,

295
00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:22,480
and he's he bangs download, he's
up. He could be discussion eventually.

296
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He just has to win a couple
more. I just don't know if he'll

297
00:23:25,559 --> 00:23:29,119
ever be able to get the pieces
to make it happen. Because of the

298
00:23:29,160 --> 00:23:33,400
market he's in, he's got to
go to the transfer portal. That's what

299
00:23:33,440 --> 00:23:36,960
the indoor calls, I'm gonna blow
this up and trade me. Well,

300
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:41,599
I he's old school, and I
think that's a big reason why the NBA

301
00:23:41,720 --> 00:23:45,440
loves Europeans, because so many of
them come from these like just shit holes.

302
00:23:47,000 --> 00:23:49,960
Like they're gorgeous countries, but economically
they're struggling. Right. They want

303
00:23:49,960 --> 00:23:55,559
to come sign a contract, play
one game, take that game, check

304
00:23:55,599 --> 00:24:00,160
to their country, retire, and
then buy the country. There's anyone more

305
00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:02,440
games? You only played one game, sir? I mean, like,

306
00:24:03,160 --> 00:24:07,839
now, this this record, Johnny
and I were talking about it, this

307
00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:14,240
record that that um Lebron James is
gonna break, hopefully in the next in

308
00:24:14,359 --> 00:24:19,480
three games. Okay, if he
breaks it right, people like this will

309
00:24:19,599 --> 00:24:22,319
would be broke. Well, there's
somebody who's on pace to do it,

310
00:24:22,319 --> 00:24:26,720
and that's Luca Daunt. But the
problem is, and John was saying this,

311
00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:30,559
Luca doesn't look like he's gonna play
for twenty years. He just doesn't

312
00:24:30,559 --> 00:24:33,920
take care of his body the way
Lebron James has. Lebron James would think

313
00:24:33,960 --> 00:24:37,160
care of his body, right,
out the game. He's always been that

314
00:24:37,200 --> 00:24:42,119
guy. Well, he knew he
had to. He was smart enough to

315
00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:45,519
know, Hey, if I want
to play this game for a long time,

316
00:24:47,119 --> 00:24:48,880
I gotta fuck in. And you
always see this people. Those people

317
00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:52,960
are like, hey, I'm gonna
I'm gonna fucking till the tires come off,

318
00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:55,640
and that's them, I'm done.
And then there's the people that like

319
00:24:56,680 --> 00:25:00,759
they have two different seasons, the
regular season and then in the off season.

320
00:25:00,119 --> 00:25:04,160
And let's talk about how much long
I mean, Lebron's going thirty a

321
00:25:04,240 --> 00:25:07,799
game. How much longer do you
think he's got. I think he'll play

322
00:25:07,799 --> 00:25:19,079
at least until he's seventy whiter.
I think he's going to at least try

323
00:25:19,319 --> 00:25:29,279
to get to play long enough.
Thirty eight. Who's who's NBA career longs?

324
00:25:29,359 --> 00:25:34,079
The oldest person not the oldest person
was the longest. Who was Robert

325
00:25:34,119 --> 00:25:38,119
Parrish? Yeah, I think he. Vince Carter is the longest NBA career

326
00:25:38,200 --> 00:25:42,279
twenty two seasons. And what's Lebron
it right now? God, that's you

327
00:25:42,319 --> 00:25:45,319
know. I think it's a guy
that doesn't get enough respect. In my

328
00:25:45,359 --> 00:25:49,160
opinion, Vince Carter, as long
as he played good, you know,

329
00:25:49,559 --> 00:25:55,720
it's twenty for Lebron. Listen,
Vince Carter. He doesn't get the respect

330
00:25:55,799 --> 00:26:00,240
he deserved because when he was young
and just full of like sprung, he

331
00:26:00,319 --> 00:26:03,759
didn't take it serious and he would
say it, he goes, my life

332
00:26:03,799 --> 00:26:07,519
isn't just basketball. I don't want
to just play this forever. And then

333
00:26:08,039 --> 00:26:11,680
then he wouldn't leave, right,
So it's like right, I mean,

334
00:26:11,720 --> 00:26:15,400
like you think about, like Lebron, dude, Vince Carter. When the

335
00:26:15,480 --> 00:26:18,480
Nets were playing, dude, they
were just like, give Vince Carter ball

336
00:26:18,519 --> 00:26:23,799
and close it out. He just
didn't have that killer instinct, like if

337
00:26:23,839 --> 00:26:29,839
you wouldn't put like Kobe Bryant's mind
in Vince Carter. Who knows how many

338
00:26:29,920 --> 00:26:33,200
championships that guy could, but he
just wasn't that killer. He just didn't

339
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:40,559
care. He just didn't. And
then he think I think Lebron wants He's

340
00:26:40,559 --> 00:26:42,599
already made it clear that he would
like to play with his kid, but

341
00:26:42,720 --> 00:26:49,559
I think that he wants to play
with his grandkid. And look, all

342
00:26:49,599 --> 00:26:55,000
Bron he's gotta do is fucking Hamburger
up one of these fucking hot freshmen that

343
00:26:55,079 --> 00:27:02,839
he You think the girls aren't clamoring
onto that guy. Look dump one into

344
00:27:02,839 --> 00:27:07,559
a dummy, get her pump out
another fucking NBA star, and in eighteen

345
00:27:07,640 --> 00:27:14,079
years you're gonna have Lebron Brownie and
their kids. Sharon Baby Sharman they call

346
00:27:14,200 --> 00:27:17,839
him. You got Bronnie, you
got Sharman, and you got the old

347
00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:22,640
man. Let me ask something.
Let me ask her how long? What's

348
00:27:22,640 --> 00:27:30,920
he? Over and under until Lebron
James's wife leaves him and becomes trans and

349
00:27:30,920 --> 00:27:37,000
then joins the NBA just keeps happy. There's no way he had her sign

350
00:27:37,119 --> 00:27:44,440
pre numps because they've been together since
high school. I mean, you know,

351
00:27:45,279 --> 00:27:49,599
probably once she's an empty nester,
once all the kids are gone.

352
00:27:49,599 --> 00:27:52,960
I bet I dude, I bet
she gets to do what she wants.

353
00:27:52,319 --> 00:27:56,559
I mean he does, you know
what I mean, there's some sometimes people

354
00:27:56,599 --> 00:27:59,559
just don't rock the boat. You
got a good situation, everyone keep them

355
00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:03,960
us done that. It's at some
point she gonna be like, mommy wants

356
00:28:03,960 --> 00:28:07,079
some dick too. But I bet
I've been dude. I bet That's what

357
00:28:07,079 --> 00:28:11,960
I'm saying, Like, I bet
you with it. He probably already gets

358
00:28:12,079 --> 00:28:17,079
I mean, she probably gets it. Yeah, she's probably got her roster.

359
00:28:17,200 --> 00:28:21,480
He's got his roster and they're a
good team. Dude. You remember

360
00:28:21,559 --> 00:28:25,920
one time that Amy Schuman was attractive
enough that Lebron James was trying to hit

361
00:28:25,960 --> 00:28:29,640
it. Do you remember that?
She's remember? I remember, yeah,

362
00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:33,240
I remember that. I believe we
did our last podcast a week before that

363
00:28:33,319 --> 00:28:37,240
happened. Yeah, yeah, that
was like four years ago. Yeah is

364
00:28:37,279 --> 00:28:42,160
Amy? She We're doing stand up
now. The reality team. Girl's amazing.

365
00:28:44,720 --> 00:28:49,160
So let's get into the football.
You've been You've been kind enough to

366
00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:52,839
to you know, we gotta I
got a big update before this. I

367
00:28:52,880 --> 00:28:57,319
got a message from our listener,
Casper. Oh, I send you,

368
00:28:57,359 --> 00:29:00,960
Johnny. I'm gonna send you something
up. They update. The AFC and

369
00:29:02,000 --> 00:29:07,079
the NFC have merged to form the
National Football League. Get ready? That

370
00:29:07,200 --> 00:29:14,000
will never work? How are they
going to decide the winner? Boy?

371
00:29:14,119 --> 00:29:17,880
The sixties are going to be a
wild, wild time. So I'm talking.

372
00:29:17,880 --> 00:29:21,480
So Casper sends me a message.
Now, if you remember Casper,

373
00:29:21,559 --> 00:29:26,759
last year one Casper one Man of
the Year by by hooking up with those

374
00:29:26,799 --> 00:29:30,359
two sisters, one of them being
his best friend. And he never hooked

375
00:29:30,400 --> 00:29:32,880
up with either one of them before, and he hadn't been late in four

376
00:29:32,960 --> 00:29:37,799
years and one week, these two
sisters both hit on him and fuck him

377
00:29:37,799 --> 00:29:45,079
the exact same way. Update alert
runk Update up days hanging out with the

378
00:29:45,079 --> 00:29:48,799
other sister. Oh there's a third
sister. No, no, no,

379
00:29:48,920 --> 00:29:55,039
the second sister. His Basically,
it was like Tiana's sister and I banged

380
00:29:55,079 --> 00:29:59,000
Tianna and I banger sister and nothing
ever happened. They never talk about it

381
00:29:59,039 --> 00:30:03,480
again. They never We're saying that
doesn't sound like it, definitely doesn't look

382
00:30:03,559 --> 00:30:08,240
like it anytime. Sam says he's
listening, I mean, I am not

383
00:30:08,240 --> 00:30:12,200
even I am listening. I am
list dude. There's a Clipper game going

384
00:30:12,200 --> 00:30:18,640
on right now that well, what
you can watch that, but you gotta

385
00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:22,880
listen. So I am mom last
for hits me up with this message,

386
00:30:22,119 --> 00:30:26,759
and he goes, you're not gonna
believe it again. It happened again right

387
00:30:26,799 --> 00:30:30,359
as it started. Two thousand and
three. Now, almost one year to

388
00:30:30,559 --> 00:30:36,000
the date, he's hanging out with
the other sister all weekend. Nothing and

389
00:30:36,079 --> 00:30:38,920
again they've never fucking mentioned one word
about it day. Everyone just pretended like

390
00:30:38,960 --> 00:30:41,519
it never happened. He still doesn't
know if they're two sisters. No,

391
00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:48,079
they're hanging out, and he's saying
it in his accent, and we're listening

392
00:30:48,119 --> 00:30:52,480
to the music, and you know, and they're sitting around doing whatever it's

393
00:30:52,519 --> 00:31:00,960
been in Dreidos. Probably one of
them called to ask fucking musics. So

394
00:31:02,720 --> 00:31:06,640
sall, yeah, there's a bunch
of geese and the indoors. They have

395
00:31:06,880 --> 00:31:11,960
geese indoors for some reason. Why
is the goose in your ship? He's

396
00:31:11,000 --> 00:31:18,079
a thoughtest guy. So she we're
having wine, we're listening to music.

397
00:31:18,559 --> 00:31:21,839
She goes into the bathroom for a
second. She's kind of drunk, but

398
00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:25,200
he's thinking, oh shit, you
know, I hope she's not too drunk

399
00:31:25,319 --> 00:31:26,920
or maybe, you know, I
have to try to get her home or

400
00:31:26,960 --> 00:31:30,480
something. She he goes, she
comes out of the bathroom, she takes

401
00:31:30,480 --> 00:31:33,519
off her stockings. Is that what
they're called? Did they call him stockings

402
00:31:33,519 --> 00:31:37,400
in America? Go? Yeah,
they call them stockings. She goes,

403
00:31:37,480 --> 00:31:42,119
and then she just takes her fucking
TETs out and we just start fucking again.

404
00:31:45,079 --> 00:31:49,000
That's amazing, Jason, Jason,
is this the one that's his good

405
00:31:49,039 --> 00:31:52,640
friend or the sister of the one? And he said, it's fine,

406
00:31:52,759 --> 00:31:56,119
I could tell the whole story.
They never even listen to this stile beating.

407
00:31:56,400 --> 00:32:00,160
How are you telling me, where
is he from Sweden? Denmark?

408
00:32:00,720 --> 00:32:05,559
So you're telling me Denmark chicks don't
listen to Punch Drunk. Is that what

409
00:32:05,640 --> 00:32:07,960
you're trying to tell me? That's
not ours good It's a good thing you

410
00:32:08,279 --> 00:32:15,119
didn't because number one doesn't. He
deleted They've all subscribed, but he went

411
00:32:15,160 --> 00:32:19,680
into her phone and deleted her subscription, so she doesn't get the updates on

412
00:32:19,720 --> 00:32:24,200
all the frequent podcasts that this show
does. We did a filibuster and we

413
00:32:24,279 --> 00:32:29,039
waited until they are we're no longer
friends, so now we could talk about

414
00:32:29,079 --> 00:32:36,440
this. You so don't let me
just say this to all the Punch Drunk

415
00:32:36,480 --> 00:32:44,119
listeners. This guy is already February
second, leading to run for Man of

416
00:32:44,160 --> 00:32:50,720
the Year for twenty three. So
we got to meet these sisters. He

417
00:32:50,720 --> 00:32:52,559
should bring him up so we can
interview them, Yeah, and not tell

418
00:32:52,640 --> 00:32:57,039
them why. You know, we
won't even mention it. And you know

419
00:32:57,079 --> 00:33:01,039
we just like so I understand you, like why, really we're really interested

420
00:33:01,079 --> 00:33:05,519
in women in sports, you know. Yeah, she can do a merry

421
00:33:05,559 --> 00:33:07,680
fuck kill with one of us.
I'll just be like, look, I

422
00:33:07,799 --> 00:33:09,920
like, abba, I got a
couple of fucking dec in the kitchen.

423
00:33:10,039 --> 00:33:13,759
I got a fucking penguin that I
can't get rid of. Live in the

424
00:33:13,799 --> 00:33:21,519
fucking icebox, and I'm fucking rock
hard right now. I don't think that

425
00:33:21,559 --> 00:33:24,319
can go wrong. You guys been
watching any of this Pro Bowl shit?

426
00:33:24,839 --> 00:33:29,440
I was just gonna bring that up
because I want to talk Pro Bowl stupid

427
00:33:29,440 --> 00:33:31,599
shit, and I want to talk
about how the Dunk Contest has been ruined.

428
00:33:32,200 --> 00:33:36,279
Yes, go on, wait,
how is the Dunk Contest run?

429
00:33:37,559 --> 00:33:40,400
They don't even have an NBA player
in it. There's two NBA players in

430
00:33:40,440 --> 00:33:45,559
a fucking what d league player that's
in it? I go Really, the

431
00:33:45,759 --> 00:33:53,960
NBA All Star Game? You can't
find there's a people on YouTube, don't

432
00:33:54,000 --> 00:33:58,880
get a YouTuber. Maybe the janitor
can do a fucking three sixty. I

433
00:33:58,960 --> 00:34:00,960
missed the days of rock. I've
a read Dunk Contest. I knowss the

434
00:34:01,039 --> 00:34:06,880
days of people. It doesn't mean
anything anymore. Yeah, the NBA mess

435
00:34:06,960 --> 00:34:12,920
that all off, dude. They
change the rules every year. They think

436
00:34:13,039 --> 00:34:16,840
it's just stupid man skill. The
Skills Challenge is better and more interesting than

437
00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:22,239
the Dunk Contest. Now, okay, here are the participants, Shaden Sharp

438
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:27,199
and Portland Trey Murphy, the third
from New Orleans. kJ Martin from Houston

439
00:34:27,280 --> 00:34:30,280
and Max McClung from the Delaware Blue
Coats. Held on, did they get

440
00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:35,480
that kid from Portland this one day? Portland shaden sharp? Is that who

441
00:34:35,480 --> 00:34:38,639
you're talking about? Yah? Who
is Mung or Chung or whatever? What?

442
00:34:38,719 --> 00:34:42,960
I don't see that? Yeah,
McClung, Max McClung. Is that

443
00:34:42,960 --> 00:34:49,119
who you're talking about? Chung,
Max McClung. Okay that Chung Clung English

444
00:34:49,119 --> 00:34:53,280
to Tripoli. Max mcclong is from
Lee. Change that guy Chung Lee from

445
00:34:53,280 --> 00:34:57,599
the fun King Chong Dung doung Bung
Bung. Oh he's a white dude.

446
00:34:57,639 --> 00:35:01,800
Okay, Yeah he can jump the
roof. Yeah you can't pull up a

447
00:35:01,800 --> 00:35:07,840
clip of this fucking dipshit. Yeah, but my kid's sharp in Portland.

448
00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:14,239
That kid's nasty. I want to
see the NBA fucking at the fans get

449
00:35:14,280 --> 00:35:17,760
to vote who's in the fucking dunk
contest and you gotta do it and you

450
00:35:17,639 --> 00:35:23,400
like it? Listen if okay,
let's say Sammy's running everything all right?

451
00:35:23,599 --> 00:35:30,280
And I first rule number one is
that in any they're in the NBA,

452
00:35:30,320 --> 00:35:35,840
if you play in the NBA,
you cannot sign a shoe contract which states

453
00:35:36,159 --> 00:35:39,519
that you get paid more if you
live, if you play in big markets,

454
00:35:39,599 --> 00:35:45,440
get rid of that gone bye bye
bye, that's gone. Second thing

455
00:35:45,599 --> 00:35:51,000
is we're gonna give a cap on
the amount of guaranteed money you could make.

456
00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:54,199
Okay, Uh, it's all about
you know, life change. You

457
00:35:54,199 --> 00:35:59,559
gotta take care of my family.
Let's say somebody signs a four hundred million

458
00:35:59,599 --> 00:36:06,760
dollars deal. Okay, they get
they guaranteed up the half that two hundred

459
00:36:07,320 --> 00:36:10,039
and that way the team isn't stuck
if he blows out wheel or he doesn't

460
00:36:10,199 --> 00:36:14,599
end up playing. Well, that's
it. And the second and the third

461
00:36:14,599 --> 00:36:17,800
thing I would do is if you
if you get selected to the Dunk contest,

462
00:36:19,039 --> 00:36:24,559
you gotta do it. That's it. Yes, no, whit.

463
00:36:25,280 --> 00:36:30,639
Johnny has to get a new hat. I'm in. I'm in more of

464
00:36:30,639 --> 00:36:34,400
this on Golden Pond hat that Johnny
has to wear. I know, Johnny,

465
00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:40,000
what is this cocoon? Here we
go? Hey, oh, Tom

466
00:36:40,079 --> 00:36:44,960
Hank switched hats switch. Here's this
guy? Look at this guy here we

467
00:36:45,039 --> 00:36:47,760
go looks like wearing a brains hat. And you fell asleep on the subway

468
00:36:47,800 --> 00:36:51,719
and woke up with a bunch of
graffiti on the Oh, this is that

469
00:36:52,159 --> 00:37:00,320
now is this guy? Okay,
bounce, he didn't win. Oh.

470
00:37:00,360 --> 00:37:02,840
I love it when black people see
white people do athletic shit. It's like

471
00:37:05,960 --> 00:37:10,239
it's like they can't believe it.
People attracted game. Here we go.

472
00:37:12,519 --> 00:37:20,079
Okay, how cook when he dunk? That gets joffe because this is fucking

473
00:37:20,199 --> 00:37:27,239
fake. It is a deep fake. The I I'm from a gay city,

474
00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:32,679
Virginia. Is he in a mind
or something? Yeah? D League,

475
00:37:34,079 --> 00:37:37,639
Delaware Blue Coats or something like that. So he's in the the league.

476
00:37:37,639 --> 00:37:43,760
Okay, I mean so since when? So now now people not in

477
00:37:43,840 --> 00:37:45,920
the NBA are in the dunk contest. Well, then let's see some of

478
00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:49,559
these super school kids that can jump
out of the gym. You want here,

479
00:37:49,679 --> 00:37:52,920
stupid, I want to see John
Morant and I want to see uh

480
00:37:54,480 --> 00:38:00,280
Morant won't do it is just ridiculous. Is he the best white dunker ever?

481
00:38:00,440 --> 00:38:02,360
Is what they're asking. I don't
think. So let's see. No,

482
00:38:07,440 --> 00:38:12,480
he's not white, come on JJ
reddick dunks fow. Let's skip to

483
00:38:12,639 --> 00:38:15,760
number one here, all right,
it's got to be John Paxson number one.

484
00:38:17,000 --> 00:38:20,559
Here's number two. Oh no,
this is his best dunk ever.

485
00:38:20,639 --> 00:38:23,400
Here we go. It's pretty good. Yeah, that's a game in a

486
00:38:23,519 --> 00:38:28,199
game, But that's in a game. The in between the leg dunk,

487
00:38:28,880 --> 00:38:32,559
he does nothing. That's part of
the dude. That's a big reason you

488
00:38:32,599 --> 00:38:37,239
can't discount. That's a big reason
for the dunk contest falling off is because

489
00:38:37,239 --> 00:38:39,039
the players aren't challenged by it anymore. They're like, dude, I mean,

490
00:38:39,079 --> 00:38:43,119
what can I do to surprise anybody
that I remember? They because for

491
00:38:43,159 --> 00:38:45,239
a while, the last time it
was interesting, it was getting to the

492
00:38:45,239 --> 00:38:49,960
point where like, Okay, everybody's
done everything in a dunk. Now we

493
00:38:50,039 --> 00:38:52,000
gotta add gimmicks, you know,
we gotta put on Superman capes and Joe.

494
00:38:53,239 --> 00:38:57,719
Now they've done all that shit.
Now they've done everything, and so

495
00:38:57,800 --> 00:39:00,000
they're not challenged. But we need
to get back to that acoustic kind of

496
00:39:00,079 --> 00:39:05,559
dunks. Duncan, You're right,
Duncan got like the way synth music got

497
00:39:05,599 --> 00:39:09,480
in the eighties where everyone quit playing
instruments and everyone's got computers and fucking keyboards

498
00:39:09,480 --> 00:39:13,800
that look like guitars and ship.
Yeah, and then after a while music

499
00:39:13,960 --> 00:39:16,000
got back to a real rock and
roll and real finesse and just back to

500
00:39:16,039 --> 00:39:20,360
the art form of it. We
need someone they're doing power dunks. We

501
00:39:20,400 --> 00:39:22,239
need someone to make these dunks.
Look, it's gonna take money, right,

502
00:39:22,239 --> 00:39:29,719
it's gonna take money, and we've
got the money. We've got all

503
00:39:29,760 --> 00:39:31,960
the money. Dana's talking to your
chasing. Oh, this is Dana's new

504
00:39:32,000 --> 00:39:35,800
things. She talks on my podcast. Go on, can't see that's her

505
00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:38,239
new new thing. But I just
see sent the side of Sam's head.

506
00:39:38,559 --> 00:39:40,840
Yeah. She doesn't like to come
on camera. She just likes to be

507
00:39:42,000 --> 00:39:45,079
off screen. Dana Flatt show a
tip, so I know it's you,

508
00:39:47,360 --> 00:39:52,559
Dana. I can't hear you with
your shirt on. What are you gonna

509
00:39:52,559 --> 00:39:58,000
ask him? What's gonna tell her
to lick it? What did she say?

510
00:39:58,199 --> 00:40:00,000
She said, you lick it?
I thought you were for coming here

511
00:40:00,079 --> 00:40:08,840
last dude, Lawler's lawing. What'd
you say? I'll be quiet going,

512
00:40:09,119 --> 00:40:14,119
I thought you were coming here?
Where is she pointing to her face.

513
00:40:14,480 --> 00:40:21,119
Yeah that was a good one.
Well, and Dana, I'm coming out

514
00:40:21,159 --> 00:40:24,719
at the end of the month,
okay, and then I'm staying for a

515
00:40:24,760 --> 00:40:30,199
long time. And by a long
time, I mean long time, love

516
00:40:30,239 --> 00:40:36,280
you long time. So you want
to talk some football or what, well,

517
00:40:36,360 --> 00:40:37,960
yeah, but I want to now
on it. Segue that how the

518
00:40:38,039 --> 00:40:42,800
dunk I tested ruined. Now I'm
looking watching this All Star shit today?

519
00:40:44,039 --> 00:40:46,280
What are you getting to that?
Hold on the last thing about basketball so

520
00:40:46,880 --> 00:40:52,000
so so interesting because they were talking
today about Lebron James someone coming to Grip

521
00:40:52,039 --> 00:40:55,880
with nepotism, right, Like,
you know, this guy's been marching about

522
00:40:55,960 --> 00:41:01,199
equality and you know, opportunity and
all the stuff. Well, his son

523
00:41:01,440 --> 00:41:09,000
has been invited to the McDonald's All
American Game, which top twenty four players

524
00:41:09,079 --> 00:41:16,920
in high school basketball. Guess what
his son's ranked. Nah, that's that's

525
00:41:17,000 --> 00:41:23,920
typical. I was gonna jokingly say, and it's actually lower. Now full

526
00:41:23,920 --> 00:41:30,480
disclosure, I have been following Brownie
for a little while. He has gotten

527
00:41:30,519 --> 00:41:35,840
way better, Like looks good,
he's he's he he's catching up to the

528
00:41:35,920 --> 00:41:38,880
hype, like he's actually Duke can
jump off of a gym. He's not

529
00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:43,559
as tall as his dad, his
brother, his little brother's really tall.

530
00:41:43,880 --> 00:41:47,360
Noways got a little brother, dude, and you see the videos of him

531
00:41:47,360 --> 00:41:51,199
and his little brother, and like
two years ago it was like this,

532
00:41:51,639 --> 00:41:55,079
and now it's like this, Yeah, he's gonna be tall like his dad.

533
00:41:55,199 --> 00:42:00,719
He's like six ten, but like, yeah, so that's the kid's

534
00:42:00,760 --> 00:42:05,199
gonna like annihilate everybody. Is the
younger brother. Everybody thought it was gonna

535
00:42:05,199 --> 00:42:08,719
be Brawny, but it's really gonna
be the younger brother. But he's gonna

536
00:42:08,760 --> 00:42:14,400
go So it's probably gonna go down
to USC or because USC. I think

537
00:42:14,440 --> 00:42:21,079
it is a Nike school or Um
Origin. I think are the two teams

538
00:42:21,079 --> 00:42:23,480
that Brawnie's gonna do. I get, I guarantee you'll go to USC.

539
00:42:23,920 --> 00:42:30,639
But it's so interesting. Yeah,
and on top of that, dude,

540
00:42:30,880 --> 00:42:35,239
it's just like you're really starting to
see nepotism in the NBA getting really bad.

541
00:42:35,599 --> 00:42:38,760
Like you're just seeing juniors and the
thirds and all that coming into like,

542
00:42:38,880 --> 00:42:42,280
oh, this was his dad,
that was his dad. This is

543
00:42:43,000 --> 00:42:46,360
the exact same way. You see
all these people, I mean, Patricks,

544
00:42:46,400 --> 00:42:51,440
certain fucking junior. You see all
these people that are my buddy and

545
00:42:51,440 --> 00:42:54,239
that were joking. You're like,
remember when we first started to feel like

546
00:42:54,239 --> 00:42:58,599
we were getting old was when the
people that we used to have posters of

547
00:42:58,719 --> 00:43:04,920
on our room in high school were
now coaches. And now the people that

548
00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:07,519
we used to have posches of in
our room their kids are in the NBA,

549
00:43:07,639 --> 00:43:10,880
in the NFL. Yeah, and
I'm still waking up being like,

550
00:43:12,239 --> 00:43:14,639
man, I wonder, I wonder
what my forty time would be, you

551
00:43:14,639 --> 00:43:16,559
know what I mean. I still
watched it and you just you go,

552
00:43:16,760 --> 00:43:22,800
fuck nine seconds maybe three seconds longer
than it was fucking five years ago,

553
00:43:22,800 --> 00:43:28,559
and we did it sneaky athletics,
like you didn't next see it coming,

554
00:43:28,599 --> 00:43:30,639
but you always found a way.
My prol officers said that to me,

555
00:43:31,039 --> 00:43:36,280
he goes fucking fast, bro,
fuck fast. You really are, dude,

556
00:43:36,320 --> 00:43:39,119
you really are? You really go. So so you're gonna talk.

557
00:43:39,239 --> 00:43:42,519
We're gonna talk about the Pro Bowl
right before we got that's when we were

558
00:43:42,519 --> 00:43:45,440
just getting into we were just finishing
up to the NBA. Let's talk about

559
00:43:45,440 --> 00:43:49,360
the Pro Bowl real quick. But
so the same thing I'm watching this ship

560
00:43:49,440 --> 00:43:54,360
right now. They were having at
the fifty yard line balloons, water balloons.

561
00:43:54,559 --> 00:43:58,920
You gotta throw it and catch it
like shit. People do it summer

562
00:43:58,960 --> 00:44:01,880
camp. It's like a field day, that's what you're saying, a school

563
00:44:01,880 --> 00:44:07,039
field day. And I'm thinking,
are you shitting me? These are the

564
00:44:07,159 --> 00:44:09,480
dumbest these are the things you came
up with. I gotta watch an offensive

565
00:44:09,519 --> 00:44:14,840
lineman throw a fucking water balloon to
his buddy and he's got to catch it

566
00:44:14,880 --> 00:44:17,000
real delicately so it doesn't break,
or if it breaks, you're out.

567
00:44:19,079 --> 00:44:22,400
I go, you gotta be shitting
me. So I jotted down a couple

568
00:44:22,400 --> 00:44:24,079
of things I think that would be
great, And you tell me you wouldn't

569
00:44:24,079 --> 00:44:30,760
turn into this. Sam. You
go the anybody that's in the Pro Bowl

570
00:44:30,039 --> 00:44:35,760
this weekend Friday night, if you've
got a fucking DUI on your record,

571
00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:39,800
you're gonna drink a case of beer
and we're doing a demolition derby nb NFL

572
00:44:40,679 --> 00:44:46,719
Duy Demolition Derby Friday night. Yes, everybody throws on helps. You're getting

573
00:44:46,760 --> 00:44:52,239
your fucking car, you're fucking hammered, and you're watching all these drunk motherfucker

574
00:44:52,320 --> 00:44:57,599
smashing each other. Be fucking fantastic. Yes, yes, done, that's

575
00:44:57,599 --> 00:45:00,840
a good one. Done. The
next one's called them me to challenge,

576
00:45:00,920 --> 00:45:05,920
right already A couple of the play, a couple of players, and you

577
00:45:06,000 --> 00:45:07,679
just get randomly called if you're in
the Pro Bowl, you're hit the fucking

578
00:45:07,719 --> 00:45:12,559
fast, you're having fun, and
they go Aaron Rodgers goes, fuck man,

579
00:45:12,719 --> 00:45:15,880
fuck and he's got to come up
there and they just get to go

580
00:45:15,920 --> 00:45:17,639
through all your dms and see if
you get fucking me too for anything,

581
00:45:17,719 --> 00:45:23,519
right there, live on television,
the Pro Bowl Me Too Challenge? Yeah,

582
00:45:23,559 --> 00:45:30,559
bro, but no, but if
Aaron Rodgers you're Sam during the year,

583
00:45:30,639 --> 00:45:32,239
you're not gonna be slipping up.
If you're if you've got Pro Bowl

584
00:45:32,360 --> 00:45:36,480
numbers, you're off the fucking social
media. Bro, you don't want to

585
00:45:36,480 --> 00:45:38,360
get me Yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's better than

586
00:45:38,400 --> 00:45:44,559
a water balloon fight. Then we
got the old dong measurement. Everyone loves

587
00:45:44,559 --> 00:45:46,760
everybody fucking eating as many hot dogs
as they can. That's it's so gross.

588
00:45:46,840 --> 00:45:51,039
All you do you stand on the
scale and it's the opposite of a

589
00:45:51,159 --> 00:45:53,559
UFC. You know how they put
the towel on so you can't see their

590
00:45:53,599 --> 00:45:57,800
dick. This time the towel just
covers their head. I don't know which

591
00:45:57,800 --> 00:46:00,360
fat fucking black eye this is,
but I see that fucking snake dropping out

592
00:46:00,360 --> 00:46:06,440
of his fucking tour. So fucking
dong measurement? How do you announce some

593
00:46:06,800 --> 00:46:09,239
things? You know it's got the
biggest dick in the NF Jason Jason,

594
00:46:09,320 --> 00:46:13,239
Jason, how do you how do
you announce the winner if you can't see

595
00:46:13,239 --> 00:46:15,920
who it is? If it's anonymous, I don't understand it's not for it

596
00:46:16,119 --> 00:46:23,480
the day, no Johnny asking logical
question. Only the winner. Only the

597
00:46:23,480 --> 00:46:30,000
winner gets to announced, and then
everybody NFL knows they don't word will get

598
00:46:30,000 --> 00:46:31,559
out, all the whites to the
coaches get to find out. I'm pretty

599
00:46:31,599 --> 00:46:35,000
sure. I'm pretty sure they do
that at the combine already. I mean,

600
00:46:35,039 --> 00:46:37,119
they measure everything. White guy will
definitely know. But I'll tell you

601
00:46:37,119 --> 00:46:42,199
what I know the answer because if
you're fucking donging out, you know you're

602
00:46:42,199 --> 00:46:45,239
gonna win this thing. You got
the confidence to the champion. The winner

603
00:46:45,360 --> 00:46:52,199
is the only one that goes up
there without a fucking towel. He's walking

604
00:46:52,280 --> 00:46:57,320
up. The one that walks up
the towelent is Ted Flexing is the fucking

605
00:46:57,360 --> 00:47:01,760
winner. That's who it is.
Ye. I mean, I watched fuck

606
00:47:01,840 --> 00:47:04,920
and I'm not shitting. I threw
this thing on and I knew we were

607
00:47:04,960 --> 00:47:07,039
doing the podcast in an hour.
I go. The first thing was a

608
00:47:07,079 --> 00:47:10,000
balloon fight, not even a balloon
fight, a blue fight would be funny.

609
00:47:10,440 --> 00:47:15,639
Just throwing a balloon and like,
shit, you're eight ship that Sam,

610
00:47:15,679 --> 00:47:17,719
when you take your fucking daughters to
the park and you're watching all these

611
00:47:17,800 --> 00:47:22,559
kids do shit this is what these
grown NFL men were doing. I go,

612
00:47:22,719 --> 00:47:25,639
this is a and it's a week
long, and this is on every

613
00:47:25,639 --> 00:47:30,360
fight. It's sound like sebastand all
the time. Now about and now this

614
00:47:30,440 --> 00:47:34,880
is what you're gonna do? Yeah, with my time? You want me

615
00:47:35,760 --> 00:47:45,199
watching this ship? But I couldn't
fucking believe three rounds of fucking dodgeball and

616
00:47:45,280 --> 00:47:51,119
it was like super boring dodgeball,
too, super boring dodgeball. So hand

617
00:47:51,119 --> 00:47:57,280
grenades, dodgeball with hand grenades,
and now or fucking and the fucking field

618
00:47:57,280 --> 00:48:00,280
goal avill kick. That's another good
one that I'd like to see. Yeah,

619
00:48:00,360 --> 00:48:04,920
you can get even a twenty yard
field goal with an hand villa instead

620
00:48:04,960 --> 00:48:10,559
of a football. You could probably
kick five hundred yard field goal. It's

621
00:48:10,599 --> 00:48:14,159
got nothing to do with football.
Some of these games. I just don't

622
00:48:14,159 --> 00:48:15,880
get it, man, Because I
really like the old skills cat challenge the

623
00:48:15,880 --> 00:48:21,760
way they used to do it,
the quarterback one where they were fucking lacing

624
00:48:21,800 --> 00:48:23,920
them up and saying that who had
the biggest one. I loved it.

625
00:48:24,360 --> 00:48:28,679
That actually was the first event.
The first event was that. Then we

626
00:48:28,719 --> 00:48:31,000
get into balloon toss and hey,
who's got the soft hands? Then people

627
00:48:31,079 --> 00:48:34,800
got to catch the fucking out of
the jugs machine, which is, by

628
00:48:34,800 --> 00:48:37,639
the way, it wasn't what I
thought it was. I thought a jugs

629
00:48:37,639 --> 00:48:39,360
machine was like push a button and
a bunch of tips come out and beat

630
00:48:39,440 --> 00:48:44,880
it around. But now it's a
thing that launches those footballs. It's boring.

631
00:48:45,800 --> 00:48:49,400
I don't know what they're gonna do. Jus Jugs really cornered the market

632
00:48:49,400 --> 00:48:52,400
on those machines, by the way, didn't they just jug? This is

633
00:48:52,440 --> 00:48:54,480
a Jugs machine. That's it.
You never hear about anybody else like working

634
00:48:54,480 --> 00:48:59,039
their way into There's no other brand. They really clean next out the coke

635
00:48:59,400 --> 00:49:02,840
Yep, it's amazing. What else
was there, Jason, I only I

636
00:49:02,840 --> 00:49:07,039
only saw a little bit. Uh, that was it? Oh, Johnny,

637
00:49:07,079 --> 00:49:09,320
don't you worry. It's just day
one. Round two is tomorrow,

638
00:49:09,400 --> 00:49:15,159
and then it finishes up this weekend
with a big flag football game. Oh,

639
00:49:15,239 --> 00:49:20,280
the longest drive competition. You got
to see four of your favorite football

640
00:49:20,320 --> 00:49:24,280
players hit a fucking driver for three
times each, which has a lot to

641
00:49:24,320 --> 00:49:28,559
do with football. That's what I
like to see one. I should throwing

642
00:49:28,599 --> 00:49:35,760
the NBA All Star Game lawn arts. Yeah, they should just care who

643
00:49:35,760 --> 00:49:38,039
won though, Who won the longest
drive. I'm actually interested in well,

644
00:49:38,079 --> 00:49:44,280
the AFC because they do it by
comparison. Anybody like surprised, you like

645
00:49:44,400 --> 00:49:45,719
like hit it like four hundred or
something like that. The guy that,

646
00:49:46,119 --> 00:49:51,559
the guy that won hit it exactly
three twenty, and so nobody's going like

647
00:49:51,639 --> 00:49:53,760
crazy. I think he's a defensive
back. I can't recall who he is,

648
00:49:53,920 --> 00:49:58,880
but here's how I know. He
sets him outland as ship because what

649
00:49:59,039 --> 00:50:04,880
is the fucking football season five months
overall? Five months before you know,

650
00:50:05,400 --> 00:50:07,159
he goes Hi. They do that
thing where it's like Little League kids.

651
00:50:07,360 --> 00:50:12,800
Hi, my name is Tommy Barrington
and my favorite player is you know,

652
00:50:13,559 --> 00:50:16,159
Steve Alford, and my favorite food
is hot dogs. They did one of

653
00:50:16,159 --> 00:50:19,719
those kind of things where i'man he
goes, he goes up, Hi,

654
00:50:19,760 --> 00:50:22,360
I'm so un telling. I'll play
defensive back for the fucking Tampa Bay Buccaneers

655
00:50:22,440 --> 00:50:27,400
or wherever the fuck he says,
and he goes and football season, my

656
00:50:27,480 --> 00:50:30,199
handicap is seventeen, and then the
off season, my handicap is a two.

657
00:50:31,280 --> 00:50:36,199
There's no fucking way on the face
of this earth that this guy his

658
00:50:36,320 --> 00:50:43,440
handicap swip swaps fourteen. Fucking it
takes two to three years for you to

659
00:50:43,559 --> 00:50:46,760
fucking knock four fucking digits off of
your handicap. And this guy's saying,

660
00:50:47,239 --> 00:50:51,519
well, when it's football time,
I'm gonna fucking I shoot at ninety seven.

661
00:50:51,760 --> 00:50:57,440
But in the summertime, I shoot
a fucking sixty eight, So right

662
00:50:57,480 --> 00:50:59,280
there, I go, Okay,
No, But I tell you what,

663
00:50:59,440 --> 00:51:01,679
you fucking that guy. I mean, they're all very athletic, but what

664
00:51:01,800 --> 00:51:06,480
does that have to do with anything. Let's see, I want to know

665
00:51:06,519 --> 00:51:14,280
who can tie a not faster that's
fucking good fast fucking athletes that is off.

666
00:51:15,320 --> 00:51:19,440
That is a good fucking term for
jerking off. Who can die?

667
00:51:22,159 --> 00:51:23,960
Yeah, that's that's the new way. That's how the fucking kids are saying

668
00:51:23,960 --> 00:51:29,239
that these days. Yeah, they
they should just do away with the whole

669
00:51:29,280 --> 00:51:32,639
thing. Rather, this is making
the Big Awards night just yeah, yeah,

670
00:51:32,960 --> 00:51:37,639
playing you know, just or just
like bring out arena a lingerie football

671
00:51:37,920 --> 00:51:43,880
and do it like the piece.
It's just stupid. It's dumb. And

672
00:51:43,920 --> 00:51:45,280
I get that you don't want your
players to get hurt, and I get

673
00:51:45,280 --> 00:51:51,760
that these guys are just gigantic fucking
hut some of them hundred million dollars investments

674
00:51:52,239 --> 00:51:59,960
and it's a you're fucked stupid.
But I swear on my good idea.

675
00:52:00,000 --> 00:52:04,800
If an Atlanta falcon or one of
my favorite players, tears his acl playing

676
00:52:05,000 --> 00:52:10,639
dodgeball for nothing, I'm gonna fucking
blow my brains out. Yeah, because

677
00:52:10,679 --> 00:52:14,679
why I get to say the one
you can't do it. He just can't

678
00:52:14,679 --> 00:52:17,199
do it. It's the sport.
He can't do it. It has nothing

679
00:52:17,239 --> 00:52:21,920
to do with anything. Just don't
let him do anything. You want to

680
00:52:21,960 --> 00:52:24,119
have a good laugh at it.
Let's have a good comedy roast. Let's

681
00:52:24,119 --> 00:52:28,280
have a Pro Bowl, you know, you give all your fucking awards away,

682
00:52:28,400 --> 00:52:31,079
and then the next night is for
the adults and everybody gets their drinking

683
00:52:31,199 --> 00:52:35,360
drinking on, and we have a
couple of comics going there and zing everybody

684
00:52:35,400 --> 00:52:39,280
really fucking good. And you throw
that on fucking Netflix way later or something

685
00:52:39,880 --> 00:52:44,679
and call it a rap. Dude, How weird is it? The Clipper

686
00:52:44,719 --> 00:52:46,840
game is going on right now.
It's one oh six, one oh five.

687
00:52:46,880 --> 00:52:51,400
I almost wanted that Clippers Bowls game
the other night. But what's really

688
00:52:51,440 --> 00:52:55,559
weird is it's like it's nine thirty
eight here. What is it where you

689
00:52:55,599 --> 00:53:01,039
are almost one am and they're still
playing this game. It's in Milwaukee.

690
00:53:01,480 --> 00:53:06,039
Why are they doing it this late? It's how it's weird about how that

691
00:53:06,079 --> 00:53:12,280
all those like that. Why why
some games are like I wonder why that's

692
00:53:12,320 --> 00:53:17,519
a good Wait, they're they're they're
playing it's in Milwaukee. Yeah, that's

693
00:53:17,559 --> 00:53:21,719
that's crazy. Well okay, so
it's it's eleven thirty eight in Milwaukee and

694
00:53:21,719 --> 00:53:27,679
they're still playing basketball. That's crazy. It's uh, it's no, it's

695
00:53:27,679 --> 00:53:31,119
ten thirty eight Milwaukee. It's ten
thirty eight. Google. Google says it's

696
00:53:31,119 --> 00:53:35,280
eleven thirty eight. Oh, they
might be on the are they East coast?

697
00:53:35,320 --> 00:53:37,599
Hame? Then? Oh I'm I'm
I'm twelve thirty eight. Yeah,

698
00:53:37,679 --> 00:53:44,599
yeah, yeah, it's there an
hour behind me. It's crazy. Yeah,

699
00:53:44,599 --> 00:53:51,719
it's almost fucking maniacs. Those fucking
maniacs in that stadium have to be

700
00:53:51,760 --> 00:53:55,360
at working eight hours. Yeah,
like what we be always six hours there

701
00:53:55,559 --> 00:54:02,000
still drinking? What are you doing? So let's talk about the playoffs?

702
00:54:04,639 --> 00:54:08,079
Yeah, um, I think it's
super interesting. Do you think that guy's

703
00:54:08,119 --> 00:54:15,920
dead? I am Jason as a
non as a non conspiracy head. Is

704
00:54:15,920 --> 00:54:21,519
it has anything struck you weird about
this? This whole thing That's why I

705
00:54:21,639 --> 00:54:30,480
was asking about this because, um, several things that struck me weird about

706
00:54:30,519 --> 00:54:35,239
it. Now, as a non
conspiracy person, I think I feldgo,

707
00:54:35,320 --> 00:54:38,079
hey, what he you know,
I would say that I think that he's

708
00:54:39,119 --> 00:54:45,760
alive. Here's what's weird, though, Have you has anybody seen him?

709
00:54:46,920 --> 00:54:51,840
Has there been one camera crew outside
of his house? Has there been the

710
00:54:51,880 --> 00:54:53,840
picture that they showed him at that
one game? Was like, he was

711
00:54:53,880 --> 00:54:59,079
like this, but he looked like
the banker on fucking uh. It looked

712
00:54:59,119 --> 00:55:01,719
like it looked like pictures of big
Foot. It looks like that footage a

713
00:55:01,719 --> 00:55:05,880
big Foot. That's what he looked. Have you watched Have you watched the

714
00:55:05,960 --> 00:55:10,480
new video of him like at the
Bill's facility and all that stuff. If

715
00:55:10,480 --> 00:55:15,800
you watch this, have you watched
it? Johnny One? I will say,

716
00:55:15,880 --> 00:55:21,159
I just just just came over today
that he was white. Way he

717
00:55:21,280 --> 00:55:24,480
got white surgery. He that's a
white It was clearly a white guy.

718
00:55:24,519 --> 00:55:30,239
And he goes, hello, my
name is Damar Hamlin, and I will

719
00:55:30,320 --> 00:55:34,480
just attending for the Masked Singer,
by the way. That's that's what they're

720
00:55:34,519 --> 00:55:38,239
saying now. People just saw him
at a taping for the Masked Singer yeah,

721
00:55:38,280 --> 00:55:44,199
it's simplete. But anyway, so
if you watch this video of him,

722
00:55:44,920 --> 00:55:46,679
like, oh look, I'm showing
my face, everyone says, I'm

723
00:55:46,760 --> 00:55:53,039
not sums up. If you watch
the video, dude, he's really weird

724
00:55:54,079 --> 00:56:00,000
because they are. It's like there's
these many glitches in it all the time.

725
00:56:00,159 --> 00:56:01,480
Well, here's a new video,
Sam checking this out. This just

726
00:56:01,519 --> 00:56:06,679
came out. I want to thank
everybody for the love and support over these

727
00:56:06,679 --> 00:56:12,760
past few weeks. As you know, CPR saved my life earlier. I

728
00:56:12,800 --> 00:56:16,440
think he's got breathing that I'm partnering
with the American Heart Association and kicking off

729
00:56:16,440 --> 00:56:20,800
the more Handlings three for Heart CPR
Challenge, and of course this one's got

730
00:56:20,800 --> 00:56:24,840
three steps step one the Heart dot
Org Slash three. I think he's still

731
00:56:24,840 --> 00:56:28,639
probably because they said he was on
oxygen when he's out, and I think

732
00:56:28,639 --> 00:56:31,880
he's probably haven't. He's probably having
issues but getting enough oxygen when he's talking,

733
00:56:31,880 --> 00:56:37,840
so they have to take breaks.
Maybe I don't though, I mean,

734
00:56:37,000 --> 00:56:40,159
luck we had a president with polio, we didn't know about it for

735
00:56:40,280 --> 00:56:45,400
fifty years. Wouldn't surprise me that
fl last time we did a show.

736
00:56:47,639 --> 00:56:52,639
You mean you mean we haven't show
but he didn't have polio yet, Okay,

737
00:56:52,719 --> 00:56:55,159
nothing bullshit? Oh shit, did
the Clippers loser? Looks like the

738
00:56:55,159 --> 00:57:00,679
Clippers lost, damn it. So
it's Pat Mahomes. Is Amahomes the best

739
00:57:00,760 --> 00:57:04,280
quarterback in the NFL right now?
Ever? Yeah? No, No,

740
00:57:04,360 --> 00:57:08,800
in the NFL right now? Yeah? Yeah? What do you think you

741
00:57:08,920 --> 00:57:14,599
mean not left in the NFL?
You mean entire season and this? Yes,

742
00:57:14,760 --> 00:57:17,119
like that's playing football in the world
right now. Is he the best?

743
00:57:17,119 --> 00:57:22,960
I think so, absolutely, and
he should be. I mean,

744
00:57:24,840 --> 00:57:30,320
I think Mahomes is great. I
think this had a better year. I

745
00:57:30,360 --> 00:57:37,840
think one series changed the narrative between
him and Joe Burrows. I think Joe

746
00:57:37,880 --> 00:57:40,199
Burrows is right on his tail.
I think Joe Burrows, I mean,

747
00:57:40,239 --> 00:57:45,119
he's young there with him. Yeah, I just I'm gonna be on I

748
00:57:45,119 --> 00:57:50,239
mean, like that last series,
if if if they'd moved the ball and

749
00:57:50,320 --> 00:57:54,119
kicked the field goal, we would
be talking about how Joe Burrows is maybe

750
00:57:54,199 --> 00:57:58,679
the best in the league. So
I think it's really interesting. I think

751
00:57:59,280 --> 00:58:04,039
I think that the Bills are in
real trouble because that coach can't figure out

752
00:58:04,079 --> 00:58:09,360
a line for Josh Allen, Like
Josh Allen's getting murdered, and they're like,

753
00:58:09,519 --> 00:58:14,159
dude, he's just he's just nods
goose those other guys. And we

754
00:58:14,239 --> 00:58:19,159
all know Burl's got a bad line
too. But dude, fucking Josh Allen

755
00:58:19,360 --> 00:58:24,079
is god constantly on the movie gets
set. He can't throw. Dude.

756
00:58:24,280 --> 00:58:28,440
Everyone wants to blame Josh Allens for
that last game. I'm sorry, but

757
00:58:28,559 --> 00:58:34,079
they also lost the best defensive player
and they're one lineman and one fucking uh.

758
00:58:34,920 --> 00:58:37,559
Can you imagine a fucking sick ass
running back, Let's say, like

759
00:58:37,599 --> 00:58:44,480
a fucking s quon Barkley who is
a free agent. Barley goes to Buffalo.

760
00:58:44,840 --> 00:58:45,920
Is he a free agent? Oh? I didn't know that? Interesting?

761
00:58:46,039 --> 00:58:49,840
Yeah, I have no faith in
him, dude. This is his

762
00:58:49,960 --> 00:58:52,159
best season. He had just had
to be a contract here, he's I

763
00:58:52,239 --> 00:58:59,000
mean, I'm sorry, dude.
Isn't that amazing how often that happens?

764
00:58:57,039 --> 00:59:01,440
Where he's better than moms and he's
better than fucking whoever else is up there.

765
00:59:02,599 --> 00:59:06,119
Sorry, dude, he's always hurt. I know he had a good

766
00:59:06,119 --> 00:59:09,000
season this year, Bob's contract here, I have no faith. These are

767
00:59:09,039 --> 00:59:17,119
your unrestricted free agents coming up here, um ranked by their contract value this

768
00:59:17,159 --> 00:59:22,199
past year. You got Orlando Brown, the left tackle from Casey Brady who's

769
00:59:22,280 --> 00:59:27,400
retired, Dion Jones the linebacker from
Cleveland, Marcus Peters cornerback, Fletcher Cox

770
00:59:27,519 --> 00:59:30,159
defensive tackle, Robert Quinn defensive end. He's getting old, but he's still

771
00:59:30,159 --> 00:59:35,039
good. Brandon Graham, uh,
Javon Hargrave. I'm just looking for names

772
00:59:35,039 --> 00:59:37,880
here. It's once the defensive guys, a bunch of defensive guys, the

773
00:59:38,000 --> 00:59:44,480
first first, the first offensive skill
guy, the first offensive skill guys.

774
00:59:44,519 --> 00:59:50,800
Aguilar. I mean it should be
fucking god, damn Lamar Jackson, go

775
00:59:51,000 --> 00:59:55,480
sicky. Should Lamar Jackson? Right, they're gonna franchise tag him for He's

776
00:59:55,480 --> 00:59:59,360
not an understanding free agent though.
These are guys that are all guaranteed to

777
00:59:59,400 --> 01:00:05,119
hit the market. I'm talking about
right here. Oh well, Davian Clowney.

778
01:00:06,239 --> 01:00:12,679
Clowney just never panned out. That's
super hit and then nothing. Oh

779
01:00:12,800 --> 01:00:15,920
dude, yeah he was. I
mean I picked him. I was on

780
01:00:15,000 --> 01:00:19,400
his ass from the beginning. I
thought that he didn't have a fitness you

781
01:00:19,440 --> 01:00:21,519
know, like he was one of
the and that turned out to be the

782
01:00:21,519 --> 01:00:23,719
case. The guy just didn't have
the stammon of the play NFL, you

783
01:00:23,760 --> 01:00:27,599
know, the high the highest level
because he's a three. Here's my thinking

784
01:00:27,639 --> 01:00:31,320
about this now, Sam, can
you hear me? Huh, Dana,

785
01:00:31,320 --> 01:00:37,719
if you're still there, come in
there, flash your puss. I can't

786
01:00:37,760 --> 01:00:42,760
wait till sexually harassed. You know
when I come out there, I'm a

787
01:00:42,880 --> 01:00:45,760
sexually harassed the funk out everybody.
Sam, you better not turn you back

788
01:00:45,800 --> 01:00:50,480
to me, buddy. Here's the
thing here's gonna be. Who's everyone's all

789
01:00:50,559 --> 01:00:54,480
this talk about, Oh my homes
and it's my homes versus fucking Jane Hurts.

790
01:00:54,480 --> 01:00:59,239
And you know what's the underlying story
of the super Bowl? Now?

791
01:00:59,760 --> 01:01:02,119
The one where they go to two
Kelsey brothers, first time ever in the

792
01:01:02,239 --> 01:01:07,760
NFL. The two brothers have competed
against each other and the super Bowl,

793
01:01:07,440 --> 01:01:16,880
And that's a good story. Rights
and Jason Kelsey two black people. No,

794
01:01:17,039 --> 01:01:21,360
there's been a lot of black people
competing against each other and pretty much

795
01:01:21,400 --> 01:01:25,360
every single super Bowl. Bro,
this is the other kind of brothers.

796
01:01:27,039 --> 01:01:30,199
That's so funny. Thank you.
I'm not even done with this yet.

797
01:01:30,199 --> 01:01:34,119
You're gonna love where this is going. And I love when bad things happen

798
01:01:34,199 --> 01:01:37,880
to children. No, I'm kidding, Sam, kidding. Here's the thing.

799
01:01:37,320 --> 01:01:44,119
The cockiest person and the person they
should investigate the most in that stadium

800
01:01:44,400 --> 01:01:47,920
is going to be the Kelsey's dad. He's got to look to his wife

801
01:01:47,960 --> 01:01:53,480
and be thinking in this big moment, you fucking dumb bitch. I came

802
01:01:53,559 --> 01:01:59,280
in you thirty eight years ago,
and look what happened a fucking super Bowl

803
01:01:59,599 --> 01:02:05,280
and you're still ride my ass about
everything. I don't know. We'll be

804
01:02:05,360 --> 01:02:08,119
right back right after this break.
I got a quick ad read guys.

805
01:02:08,119 --> 01:02:10,719
Oh, and I got some dates
out of the gates, quick ad read

806
01:02:10,719 --> 01:02:14,360
them. We'll be right back.
Oh, this is a good money.

807
01:02:14,360 --> 01:02:16,199
I'm met this guy and he gets
took me some money to read this ad

808
01:02:16,960 --> 01:02:25,159
for place called the Shining Fuck.
Guys, it's a car wash that it's

809
01:02:25,400 --> 01:02:31,039
used to be an old firehouse.
So bring your you got your wife,

810
01:02:31,960 --> 01:02:35,840
you got your car, bringing on
down. Use the code. Now,

811
01:02:35,920 --> 01:02:38,000
this guy was pretty hammered. Money
gave me the code. But use the

812
01:02:38,039 --> 01:02:44,639
code lunch drink sports. We'll get
that changed and it gives you a free

813
01:02:44,760 --> 01:02:47,400
tire, shine and get your bad
cast. So and he got to seeing

814
01:02:47,400 --> 01:02:51,679
this jingle. This is so stupid
for the Shining Fuck. But it's on

815
01:02:51,719 --> 01:02:55,440
the corner of seventh in sumter and
grab your wife, grab your truck,

816
01:02:55,760 --> 01:03:00,199
bringing on them down to the shine
and fuck. So is the code again?

817
01:03:00,280 --> 01:03:06,400
That's lunch, drink sports, get
your backs and now back to the

818
01:03:06,400 --> 01:03:09,440
show, Sammy. Do you have
any dates? Uh? For dates out

819
01:03:09,480 --> 01:03:15,159
the gates? I got one seventeen
eighteen. I am at the Dojo of

820
01:03:15,280 --> 01:03:19,599
Comedy in New York, I mean
New Jersey. Yes, and Joey Diaz,

821
01:03:20,119 --> 01:03:22,519
Oh, I would love to see
him. Then the following week I'm

822
01:03:22,559 --> 01:03:28,679
in Tacoma and Spokane, and the
following week after that Minneapolis. How about

823
01:03:28,679 --> 01:03:32,079
your boy, nice. I am
going to be the rest of the Black

824
01:03:32,119 --> 01:03:37,679
History Month. I'm going to be
headlining app say on Martin Luther, King

825
01:03:37,760 --> 01:03:43,280
Boulevard and Wakonda. So come on
down to that guys, respect Thanks,

826
01:03:43,320 --> 01:03:46,599
thanks, Thanks, Um predictions for
the super Bowl? You need you guys

827
01:03:46,760 --> 01:03:53,599
putting any money on it? Um? Not yet, not yet. I'm

828
01:03:53,639 --> 01:04:00,199
feeling right now, I feel Eagles. I'm feeling a little big spread right

829
01:04:00,239 --> 01:04:03,199
now. Is it about two maybe
two and a half. I feel it

830
01:04:03,280 --> 01:04:05,800
says one and a half on the
ESPN right now. It's going to one

831
01:04:06,119 --> 01:04:10,599
right there, So it's a coin
flip. I would tease that thing a

832
01:04:10,760 --> 01:04:15,440
fucking I think the Eagles could win
this game by thirteen. Really, I

833
01:04:15,440 --> 01:04:17,199
don't really do. I didn't like
what I saw against Since. I mean,

834
01:04:17,239 --> 01:04:20,320
I thought the chief stamp the shit
out of the Niners. What you're

835
01:04:20,320 --> 01:04:25,559
talking about? I I thought the
Chiefs looked good. I think the Eagles

836
01:04:25,559 --> 01:04:30,159
are more complete tea. I think
they're just they're deeper out, I mean,

837
01:04:31,039 --> 01:04:36,480
the biggest, their biggest weapon.
But Jay is right, MVP,

838
01:04:36,599 --> 01:04:44,719
you can stop Travis Kelcey. You
can fucking stop well by the ways and

839
01:04:44,920 --> 01:04:49,119
Dominican sue coming, bang, get
another ring, shut your face. What's

840
01:04:49,159 --> 01:04:53,519
that guy's name? That defensive tackle
for the Chiefs out Damn, he's good.

841
01:04:53,559 --> 01:04:56,800
He was so good in that game
against Since he's really good, I

842
01:04:56,840 --> 01:04:59,159
think he might be a fucking Jones. Is it? What's his name?

843
01:05:00,320 --> 01:05:02,360
Yeah, it's um. I can't
remember. I can never remember that guy's

844
01:05:02,480 --> 01:05:09,760
name, but he no, hold
on, hold on, I know exactly

845
01:05:09,760 --> 01:05:12,639
what you talked about. And they
got Georges. It's Chris Jones. Yeah,

846
01:05:12,719 --> 01:05:15,599
Chris Jones. Chris Jones and Jordan
in the fucking rookie from Georgia.

847
01:05:15,639 --> 01:05:20,000
That's like three hundred ninety pounds.
Chris Jones has fifteen and a half sacks

848
01:05:20,039 --> 01:05:25,840
this year. He's been a defensive
end or a line back. Six six,

849
01:05:26,039 --> 01:05:29,920
three hundred ten pounds. We've been
pushing his way through two three hundred

850
01:05:29,960 --> 01:05:32,320
pound guys to get They lined him
up at end for that last big play

851
01:05:32,360 --> 01:05:35,440
where he sack Mahomes on like third
and ten or the game. That was

852
01:05:35,440 --> 01:05:39,840
a game right there. He could
be a game changer. I really like

853
01:05:39,880 --> 01:05:41,960
a guy like that. In the
Super Bowl too, it seems like they

854
01:05:42,239 --> 01:05:46,320
show up to Joe Burrows. What
did you say he said when he sacked

855
01:05:46,360 --> 01:05:51,000
Joe Burrow, Right, yeah,
Joe Burrow. Yeah yeah, sack Mahomes.

856
01:05:51,400 --> 01:05:54,440
Oh shit, yeah sorry yeah.
But at the end of the game,

857
01:05:55,000 --> 01:05:58,199
that was the biggest play of the
game when he sacked uh Burrow,

858
01:05:58,960 --> 01:06:01,559
and he was I mean giving them
hell that whole game. They kept moving

859
01:06:01,599 --> 01:06:05,840
him around. I love that guy. I could see him causing uh hurts

860
01:06:05,840 --> 01:06:13,440
the problems, but hurts. What
are you laughing at? I'm sorry,

861
01:06:13,519 --> 01:06:16,159
it just fucking just what are you
laughing at? Dude? I just was

862
01:06:16,199 --> 01:06:19,480
flipping through this ship and I was
like crossing ship off, like to make

863
01:06:19,519 --> 01:06:23,559
sure that you know, don't are
you laughing at old jokes or something?

864
01:06:23,599 --> 01:06:28,000
Are you laughing at us? Bro? I'm laughing at that. I just

865
01:06:28,039 --> 01:06:29,960
almost said up that. I set
out a lot of him a head.

866
01:06:30,079 --> 01:06:32,480
Okay, I did the wa kinda
thing, and I did the shining Fuck

867
01:06:39,679 --> 01:06:43,400
Johnny, Sam, you're going Eagles
and you I mean, you're really just

868
01:06:43,440 --> 01:06:45,960
picking a winner at one and a
half. I mean, maybe the spread

869
01:06:45,039 --> 01:06:47,800
goods up to two or three,
but fuck, this is a coin toss

870
01:06:47,840 --> 01:06:51,639
game. I'm I know we can
eat these words. I know everyone's gonna

871
01:06:51,639 --> 01:06:56,519
tweet at me from Kansas all the
Kansas City fans. I think the Eagles

872
01:06:56,559 --> 01:06:59,039
winning this game. I'm gonna write
it down Mark right now, so I

873
01:06:59,119 --> 01:07:01,519
remember it. Here's what my score
is going to be. Everyone thinking their

874
01:07:01,559 --> 01:07:09,800
score. What's the over under on
this, Johnny? It's like fifty two,

875
01:07:09,880 --> 01:07:12,840
isn't it? Hold On, I
had it. I went to the

876
01:07:13,679 --> 01:07:16,920
just a second, I went to
the depth charts. Second, hold on,

877
01:07:17,920 --> 01:07:27,599
the overunder is fifty point five fifty
one twenty Eagles. I got twenty

878
01:07:27,599 --> 01:07:30,119
seven twenty one. I'm picking the
team in the best quarterback into me.

879
01:07:30,199 --> 01:07:35,119
That's Kansas City. So what you
got, Sam? What's your score for

880
01:07:35,159 --> 01:07:40,639
the Super Bowl. Who you got. I'm going to go, m I'm

881
01:07:40,679 --> 01:07:51,440
going to go thirty four twenty four
Eagles, thirty four twenty four. That's

882
01:07:51,480 --> 01:07:56,119
Sam going Eagles. You write it
down, Jason, I'm write it down

883
01:07:56,159 --> 01:08:02,920
in Johnny. You said twenty seven
twenty one, Chief Jeeves twenty seven twenty

884
01:08:02,960 --> 01:08:08,360
one. Yeah, I've been mightbe
it might be twenty seven twenty four.

885
01:08:08,400 --> 01:08:10,559
Actually I can see that, but
I think a little, a little,

886
01:08:10,559 --> 01:08:13,719
a little closer there. Huh.
I've been texting with our good friend Adam

887
01:08:13,800 --> 01:08:18,439
Egot all season long and about this
Russian Uh, these two run It's the

888
01:08:18,520 --> 01:08:23,119
dumbest thing ever, but these two
Russian brothers and they live with his bear,

889
01:08:24,399 --> 01:08:28,000
and I've been gambling with them.
I've been gambling with those Russian guys

890
01:08:28,000 --> 01:08:32,039
with Adams money. What are you
talking about? The be the bets that

891
01:08:32,079 --> 01:08:35,560
I make, there's not real,
but the bets that I make are so

892
01:08:38,239 --> 01:08:41,399
Oh he's doing it. He does
a bit with Adam. I gotta yeah,

893
01:08:41,520 --> 01:08:44,319
yeah. I texted Adam eget all
the stupid and I go. So

894
01:08:44,520 --> 01:08:48,479
during the game, I lost like
maybe forty I think forty thousand dollars of

895
01:08:48,560 --> 01:08:54,239
Adam's money with the dumbest bed I
took the over and the under in a

896
01:08:54,359 --> 01:08:59,840
parlay. But then so the next
one it was what was the second game,

897
01:09:00,039 --> 01:09:03,520
second game as Chiefs Bengals. I
go, Adam, listen, you

898
01:09:03,600 --> 01:09:06,640
gotta get some money back from these
fucking guys. And I really pissed at

899
01:09:06,680 --> 01:09:14,199
you. But huh, the minute
a fucking defensive touchdown is scored by a

900
01:09:14,239 --> 01:09:17,039
forty nine er in this game,
you're gonna win like a billion dollars.

901
01:09:20,680 --> 01:09:25,119
How would a forty nine or go
from the first game all the way to

902
01:09:25,199 --> 01:09:30,680
the game and scored a defensive touchdown. I go, dude, if it

903
01:09:30,720 --> 01:09:32,640
happens, you get two and a
half billion dollars, and he goes,

904
01:09:32,760 --> 01:09:36,960
but what I'm out my other forty
thousand. Then I'm down. By the

905
01:09:38,000 --> 01:09:42,880
way, Jason, I saw you
on on Jeff Richards podcast with him doing

906
01:09:42,960 --> 01:09:45,960
Jordan Peterson that, oh yeah,
that it was hilarious the Jeff Richards Show.

907
01:09:46,279 --> 01:09:49,840
Jeff couldn't make it, so I
interviewed Jordan Peterson for him. His

908
01:09:49,960 --> 01:09:55,840
impression is, man, Jordan Peterson
put on some weight. Huh yeah,

909
01:09:56,159 --> 01:10:00,439
you all bees, dude, A
couple of bees. His im I was

910
01:10:00,439 --> 01:10:03,239
pretty good, and I hadn't heard
he was and talked that much, so

911
01:10:03,279 --> 01:10:05,760
I had to go, like watch
a bunch of his videos and kind of

912
01:10:06,239 --> 01:10:10,119
look, you know, what's hard
to do is be a straight man like

913
01:10:10,159 --> 01:10:13,800
that, because it's so hard for
you to be straight, isn't it?

914
01:10:14,800 --> 01:10:16,439
And when it comes to comedy and
stuff. But dude, you get you

915
01:10:16,920 --> 01:10:20,239
turn this mic off. I gotta
fucking want you should see the dicks over

916
01:10:20,319 --> 01:10:25,520
here going like this, wrap it
up, wrap it right off camera here,

917
01:10:25,600 --> 01:10:30,760
Bro, It's just gonna be good, you know what I mean,

918
01:10:30,800 --> 01:10:38,319
Like a fucking Rodney Kings situation with
buzz amen. Amen? You know,

919
01:10:39,359 --> 01:10:44,520
um, but what the fuck are
we saying about? Just talking about dicks?

920
01:10:44,560 --> 01:10:48,000
You know, the normals? What
we were talking about dicks? Talking

921
01:10:48,000 --> 01:10:50,880
about the super Bowl? The over
Runner. You were betting with Adam's money

922
01:10:51,319 --> 01:10:56,239
against these guys with bears rush to
rushing guys with bears. I'll send you

923
01:10:56,279 --> 01:10:59,319
a picture of these guys. You
ever see that video that's it's like these

924
01:10:59,560 --> 01:11:01,479
It's a craziest video of all time. I don't even understand what's going on,

925
01:11:01,840 --> 01:11:05,800
but it's still rushing, period,
and they're punched like he'll punch him

926
01:11:05,800 --> 01:11:09,479
in a stummay punch him in his
stomach and then he'll pick his legs up.

927
01:11:09,720 --> 01:11:13,039
And in the background is this bear
just bouncing the tree up and down.

928
01:11:13,439 --> 01:11:20,479
Have you seen this video? You
have sam yeahs punching each other and

929
01:11:20,479 --> 01:11:24,920
then the bear is in the background. Yeah, like the guy's working out,

930
01:11:25,079 --> 01:11:30,760
like yeah, ye are they Russians
or is that Russians? Bro There's

931
01:11:30,800 --> 01:11:36,000
no way these I meant it looks
Russian. It basically comes up. But

932
01:11:36,119 --> 01:11:43,520
then so I kept so then I
said, uh, I've been telling fucking

933
01:11:43,560 --> 01:11:45,239
Egot that dis these two Russian brothers. And then I saw that video and

934
01:11:45,319 --> 01:11:47,600
I sent it to him. I
go, this is those brothers that are

935
01:11:47,640 --> 01:11:50,880
fucking roll pissed the training for you
got it? He goes, who's the

936
01:11:50,920 --> 01:11:56,720
bear? I go, that's the
third brother? All right, this is

937
01:11:56,760 --> 01:12:00,359
the Yeah, yeah, this is
these are those guys have been gamble a

938
01:12:00,479 --> 01:12:14,159
list without them's money. What is
happening? What is the bearing? That's

939
01:12:14,159 --> 01:12:17,600
the best? I mean is the
bear doing it's in the look at the

940
01:12:17,640 --> 01:12:23,039
bears just looking and he's very happy
about it. And that's his job,

941
01:12:23,119 --> 01:12:30,880
Brood. That ship is pretty good
in Russia. Tree Guy. Tree Guy

942
01:12:30,920 --> 01:12:39,439
gets paid. Bro three bear is
even more fucking elite. Who do you

943
01:12:39,439 --> 01:12:47,039
gotta fight, Detroit bear or Russian
bear? Be? Remember Detroit? Like

944
01:12:47,319 --> 01:12:50,680
all the bears are moving into the
houses they just lived next. Oh,

945
01:12:50,720 --> 01:12:57,159
well they're those those be spoiled they're
living in the house. Yeah, those

946
01:12:57,159 --> 01:13:00,760
are just big raccoons compared to those
Russian bears. Are inar bears? You

947
01:13:00,800 --> 01:13:06,880
know those are house bears. Respects. Yeah, those are just gigantic raccoons.

948
01:13:08,439 --> 01:13:13,920
What are your thoughts about fucking Tom
Brady retiring? Uh, well,

949
01:13:14,439 --> 01:13:17,199
I mean for real, it's for
real, It's for real, dude,

950
01:13:17,760 --> 01:13:24,199
said reasons Fox. Yeah, he
had allion reasons for him to not get

951
01:13:24,279 --> 01:13:28,560
tackle again. Yeah. And then
also, like, I mean, like

952
01:13:28,760 --> 01:13:32,840
I actually think that he did that
radio show just the practice for don't doing

953
01:13:32,880 --> 01:13:38,079
television. Uh, he's really good
at his radio show. He's really good.

954
01:13:38,119 --> 01:13:41,640
I mean, like really I think
he's he's good. Oh yeah,

955
01:13:41,680 --> 01:13:45,520
he's great on that show. I'll
tell you this. And I might be

956
01:13:45,600 --> 01:13:48,760
going out on a limb here,
but I think Tom Brady's gonna be all

957
01:13:48,920 --> 01:13:53,760
right. Now, tell me a
bear pushing down on that limb while you're

958
01:13:53,960 --> 01:13:57,520
think about this. He just got
divorced. He no longer has to play.

959
01:13:57,960 --> 01:14:01,359
He literally is gonna get paid three
hundred million dollars to have thirty two

960
01:14:01,399 --> 01:14:08,439
girlfriends in every NFL city hot chick
of all time? Have you seen how

961
01:14:08,479 --> 01:14:12,399
hot she is? Oh my god, she's like number one in the world.

962
01:14:12,720 --> 01:14:16,800
I would saw my arms off to
hug her once before the hug you

963
01:14:16,920 --> 01:14:27,399
know, yeah your hammer. Hey, let me get this joke in while

964
01:14:27,479 --> 01:14:30,520
Johnny, you pull up this hot
fucking girlfriend of her. She's so hot.

965
01:14:30,600 --> 01:14:34,640
I really have real feelings for her. Oh my gosh, she's so

966
01:14:34,720 --> 01:14:39,600
hot. Bro. There's one picture
of her in a Tampa Bay jersey that

967
01:14:39,800 --> 01:14:44,439
is just it makes me want to
hurt myself. Yeah, that one right

968
01:14:44,479 --> 01:14:48,000
there. I her brig her big
book. The thing she brags about is

969
01:14:48,039 --> 01:14:51,800
that it's no none of its plastic
surgery. Her whole thing is she's one

970
01:14:53,640 --> 01:14:59,359
natural, So that is hop shelf
natural. I mean on her in that

971
01:14:59,479 --> 01:15:03,760
jersey right there is just oh wait, wait, wait, there's nothing natural

972
01:15:03,800 --> 01:15:08,920
about this on the right doesn't even
look like her. That right I would

973
01:15:08,920 --> 01:15:14,640
punt that's her face if she left. Yeah, no, it doesn't even

974
01:15:14,680 --> 01:15:15,920
look like the same girl. What
has she done? She got her lips

975
01:15:15,920 --> 01:15:20,119
all blown up and like, what
is he? That's her? That's her

976
01:15:20,520 --> 01:15:26,680
gro she's if she did all that
work to that to what the girl is

977
01:15:26,680 --> 01:15:30,920
on the left, she's stupid because
girl on the left is absolutely stunt.

978
01:15:30,000 --> 01:15:35,319
Women just don't get what guys like. That's like, he's like, I

979
01:15:35,479 --> 01:15:41,239
feel like sucking around with her today, And I'm telling you, I like,

980
01:15:41,399 --> 01:15:45,800
is she gonna want to have kids
with him? Does he want to

981
01:15:45,840 --> 01:15:46,960
have kids? Do we know that? Why would he want to have more

982
01:15:47,039 --> 01:15:50,920
children? Well, because she's gonna
want kids because look, he got money

983
01:15:50,960 --> 01:15:55,079
like him. You don't even have
you pay someone to talk to your kids

984
01:15:55,119 --> 01:15:59,000
for you tell what's his face?
I says time for dinner and then you

985
01:15:59,000 --> 01:16:01,560
tell the chef to go hook it
up? Sam, I'll tell you this

986
01:16:01,680 --> 01:16:06,000
joke. Tell me if you liked
this bit. I love it. Tom

987
01:16:06,039 --> 01:16:10,760
Brady's so old that he remembers when
the water was good at can't pleassume?

988
01:16:12,720 --> 01:16:20,079
Get it? Ah? Ah?
Do you want as a Raiders fan Aaron

989
01:16:20,199 --> 01:16:25,399
Rodgers because you know Tom Brady's gone, so now he's Aaron Rodgers rumors?

990
01:16:25,840 --> 01:16:29,039
Well you know what man? I
mean, Like, we're gonna pay one

991
01:16:29,439 --> 01:16:33,439
Derek Carr forty mill We're paying fucking
Aaron Rodgers fifty mil so, I don't

992
01:16:33,439 --> 01:16:38,760
think it's that insane. But not
the money. It's not the money you're

993
01:16:38,800 --> 01:16:44,960
gonna that's just that just works its
way out always. It's I mean,

994
01:16:45,000 --> 01:16:48,119
you're gonna have to rebuild that quarterback
in two years and then you can then

995
01:16:48,119 --> 01:16:53,800
you get your something. That quarterback
rat race, I mean, do you

996
01:16:53,840 --> 01:16:56,680
get you draft your guy this year
and then you get I missed, I

997
01:16:56,760 --> 01:17:01,319
missed the guys. Well, are
you talking about Green Bay or Aaron Rodgers

998
01:17:01,399 --> 01:17:05,359
going to the Raiders? The Raiders? Oh, okay, does Sam?

999
01:17:05,399 --> 01:17:08,880
Would Sam won him or not?
Yeah? I take him. I mean,

1000
01:17:08,920 --> 01:17:14,079
like the worst part is we're just
gonna have this giant rebuild that will

1001
01:17:14,159 --> 01:17:16,800
lead the knower. Are you a
quarterback away though, right, because that's

1002
01:17:16,800 --> 01:17:20,760
a movie make If you're a quarterback
away from when that point, that's my

1003
01:17:20,880 --> 01:17:25,079
point. I'm with you. Yeah, if you're not, I mean,

1004
01:17:25,079 --> 01:17:28,600
I don't think they should let cargo
until they have somebody else. You know,

1005
01:17:28,680 --> 01:17:32,800
it's gone, bro, I know
what I'm saying. Quarterback challenge at

1006
01:17:32,800 --> 01:17:35,560
this thing. He's like, this
is my stadium. He's the one,

1007
01:17:35,640 --> 01:17:39,199
you know, when you got to
hit the fucking all the different moving targets

1008
01:17:39,239 --> 01:17:41,680
and all this. I hope we
get him. I would love the Panthers

1009
01:17:41,680 --> 01:17:48,359
again. I could see good.
What do you guys think about Sean Payton

1010
01:17:48,399 --> 01:17:51,239
the trade for him first round or
second round? I think he's an idiot.

1011
01:17:51,880 --> 01:17:58,640
He's an idiot. Yeah, for
going there? Well, I mean

1012
01:17:58,640 --> 01:18:01,119
I think Russell Wilson is toast.
I don't think I do. That's why

1013
01:18:01,159 --> 01:18:04,239
I think he's stupid for going there. I mean, he can eat.

1014
01:18:04,399 --> 01:18:09,560
I mean, what's the worst case
scenario for two years they don't get along.

1015
01:18:09,920 --> 01:18:13,239
Russell Wilson's not the one that's gonna
be sticking around. It's Sean Payton.

1016
01:18:13,680 --> 01:18:19,479
Yeah, I know Sean Payton.
Sean Payton threatened to shoot me with

1017
01:18:19,560 --> 01:18:26,600
a shotgun for telling him fuck the
Saints. I said it to his face.

1018
01:18:27,000 --> 01:18:30,279
Now it sound like Brodie. I
said it to him. You're out

1019
01:18:30,279 --> 01:18:34,319
of here. You guys, see
those numbers, seventeen to twenty mil per

1020
01:18:34,399 --> 01:18:38,640
years. What they're looking at for, it's what he's gonna get the top

1021
01:18:38,680 --> 01:18:44,279
guys. He's the guy. He's
the guy. I mean that again,

1022
01:18:44,399 --> 01:18:46,880
this is a guy that you just
paid Gruden, that you're still paying Gruden.

1023
01:18:46,960 --> 01:18:50,880
That I mean, so it's not
like the teams aren't five years.

1024
01:18:51,199 --> 01:18:55,640
They haven't announced it officially yet,
but they're saying it somewhere between seventeen and

1025
01:18:55,720 --> 01:18:59,399
twenty mil over five years. So
this guy might be the I would assume,

1026
01:19:00,119 --> 01:19:03,680
maybe behind Belichick, the first coach
to get one hundred million dollars plus

1027
01:19:03,720 --> 01:19:09,159
contract, right like that, Like
it's going to be, right, who

1028
01:19:09,159 --> 01:19:11,680
else we get one hundred million dollars
contract? I'm trying to think it'd be

1029
01:19:11,720 --> 01:19:15,920
just Belichick, right, I think
our hardball was like trying to get that

1030
01:19:15,039 --> 01:19:19,000
money too. Yeah, that's that's
a good point. And I think Grooted

1031
01:19:19,159 --> 01:19:24,279
maybe have been had some crazy numbers
with the Raiders until he got let go.

1032
01:19:24,359 --> 01:19:29,159
With all that, all right,
these are the highest paid coaches in

1033
01:19:29,199 --> 01:19:31,680
the NFL. In the NFL,
McVeagh is the number one, fifteen to

1034
01:19:31,800 --> 01:19:41,399
eighteen. Then Belichick he's just annoying. Then Carroll eleven, my Kyle Shanahan

1035
01:19:41,880 --> 01:19:45,960
nine and a half, John Harball
nine, Frank Reich, who's now the

1036
01:19:45,000 --> 01:19:49,239
coach of the Panthers, was making
nine. Matt Rule, who's fired,

1037
01:19:49,399 --> 01:19:55,520
was getting eight point five. So
yeah, he's still making five. That's

1038
01:19:55,600 --> 01:19:59,199
funny. When the Panthers hired Frank
Reich. I don't. I'm fine with

1039
01:19:59,279 --> 01:20:04,680
that. I guess what what people
think? What do you guys think?

1040
01:20:02,680 --> 01:20:09,319
What I think? Quarterback guy?
I think your biggest problem is quarterback and

1041
01:20:09,359 --> 01:20:14,479
it has basins. Cam Newton started
wearing all those crazy hats that look like

1042
01:20:14,560 --> 01:20:19,119
lampshades, and I think that they
brought him in with that purpose. Hey

1043
01:20:19,119 --> 01:20:24,239
man, we've got a quarterback problem
over here and years there's a quarterback whisperer,

1044
01:20:24,560 --> 01:20:27,560
So do something. You know,
how did that work out with Matt

1045
01:20:27,640 --> 01:20:32,720
Ryan? Huh? The quarterback whisper
thing. Well, by the time they

1046
01:20:32,720 --> 01:20:39,359
were so bad they had to bench
Matt Ryan because they had no shot at

1047
01:20:39,359 --> 01:20:43,039
winning. And if he gets fucking
hurt, they owned seven gazillion dollars.

1048
01:20:43,279 --> 01:20:45,399
You know, they asked me,
it is the best thing. They go,

1049
01:20:45,760 --> 01:20:47,520
Hey, you know, you know, for a pretty rough year right

1050
01:20:47,560 --> 01:20:50,520
there at the end of the season, he played on retire, he goes.

1051
01:20:50,199 --> 01:20:54,520
He literally laughed when he said it, because if he retires, he

1052
01:20:54,520 --> 01:20:58,079
doesn't get any of that money.
And if he doesn't retire, the Colts

1053
01:20:58,159 --> 01:21:01,079
have to get rid of him.
Means they're just gonna cut him and pay

1054
01:21:01,119 --> 01:21:03,960
him. So he's gonna get twenty
million dollars next year, not gonn play

1055
01:21:04,039 --> 01:21:08,439
football. But if he goes,
oh yeah, this is my last game,

1056
01:21:08,439 --> 01:21:12,640
I'm definitely retired to coast go.
That was a twenty million dollars sentence.

1057
01:21:14,680 --> 01:21:16,239
You know. His people called him
up and they go, hey,

1058
01:21:16,479 --> 01:21:19,640
do not say the R word,
and he goes, I would never call

1059
01:21:19,680 --> 01:21:23,960
someone retirded. He goes, no, you can always say that. Don't

1060
01:21:23,960 --> 01:21:29,920
say you retire because he's gonna cost
us a lot of money. Baby.

1061
01:21:30,079 --> 01:21:33,119
Alright, guys, all right,
guys, baby, I love you.

1062
01:21:33,279 --> 01:21:40,119
Let's do some more often. Yeah, for sure, dot com for all

1063
01:21:40,159 --> 01:21:43,239
your ticketing needs. I love you, guys. I'm exhausted. I'll hit

1064
01:21:43,279 --> 01:21:50,840
you later, Sammy you guys,
Yes, I suck it. Um.

1065
01:21:50,880 --> 01:21:57,279
I definitely am Johnny. I watched
that Megan movie. It's good, right.

1066
01:21:57,319 --> 01:22:02,199
I like that you saw it in
the theater? Yeah, yeah,

1067
01:22:02,600 --> 01:22:05,399
I said, I guess what I
saw it with Megan. My sister almost

1068
01:22:05,479 --> 01:22:11,359
opened up a black hole and emanates. They go, hey, you know

1069
01:22:11,479 --> 01:22:14,279
to it. I go one a
dolt and I'm Megan. They goes,

1070
01:22:14,319 --> 01:22:18,960
that really your name? She gave
him that fucking little mean ass doll looking

1071
01:22:19,119 --> 01:22:23,800
I think, dude, how like
the look of They had to get that

1072
01:22:23,840 --> 01:22:27,800
look right because that made the movie
entertaining. How creepy and funny that doll

1073
01:22:27,880 --> 01:22:30,439
looked like if it looked If it
didn't look like that, that movie would

1074
01:22:30,439 --> 01:22:35,640
not be nearly as funny and like
good as it was that the doll.

1075
01:22:36,840 --> 01:22:41,800
You want to do yourself a little
something? Good friend, friend of the

1076
01:22:41,800 --> 01:22:46,199
show and everybody's favorite comedian, Justin
Martin Dale. He's got a podcast.

1077
01:22:46,840 --> 01:22:51,119
What the name of it is,
Glitter and Glitz some shit, Justin Martindale.

1078
01:22:51,119 --> 01:22:58,279
I go to Glitter whatever. Yeah, And he had the girl on

1079
01:22:58,399 --> 01:23:03,760
there that did the voice from Megan, Oh really on his podcast. And

1080
01:23:03,800 --> 01:23:08,600
she's pretty fucking hot. And she
just got scared when I said that because

1081
01:23:08,600 --> 01:23:11,039
I don't know. I don't know
how old she is. She looks like

1082
01:23:11,159 --> 01:23:15,439
she's thirty, but she wasn't young
too. Go to his Instagram and I'll

1083
01:23:15,479 --> 01:23:19,199
show you which clip and you can
hear her talking because she's hot too.

1084
01:23:20,439 --> 01:23:26,079
And you know, they do some
faith little improvs where she's a robot and

1085
01:23:26,119 --> 01:23:30,560
he's the robot and stupid ship.
But oh, you're seriously, I'm surprised

1086
01:23:30,600 --> 01:23:32,800
that I'm surprised that she wouldn't have
a contract that would say she couldn't do

1087
01:23:32,840 --> 01:23:36,640
that. That's funny. Well,
now that I think about it, she

1088
01:23:36,760 --> 01:23:40,479
was just doing lines from the movie
and he was doing shit. So maybe

1089
01:23:40,520 --> 01:23:45,359
she's only allowed to say ship in
the movie. Wait, huh, she

1090
01:23:45,439 --> 01:23:48,399
might be a child. Hold on
this thing. Oh, she looked like

1091
01:23:48,439 --> 01:23:51,800
she's thirty when in this interview.
I don't know how this says. Now.

1092
01:23:51,840 --> 01:23:55,119
I don't know if this might be
the person in the doll. Oh

1093
01:23:55,199 --> 01:23:57,439
here it is, okay, Now
that was the person in the doll.

1094
01:23:57,640 --> 01:24:00,119
There was actually a person inside of
that doll. There's read different people that

1095
01:24:00,159 --> 01:24:03,800
are in the doll. There's here's
That's what I think about it. I

1096
01:24:03,800 --> 01:24:09,199
think it's different. She was born
in two thousand and four. What is

1097
01:24:09,239 --> 01:24:15,159
that? Twenty eight? Nineteen nineteen, Yeah, nineteen, she does not

1098
01:24:15,239 --> 01:24:18,079
look now watch his interview and tell
me she's nineteen. I'm so glad she

1099
01:24:18,159 --> 01:24:23,800
was legal, because when I saw
her, I assume she jerked off immediately

1100
01:24:23,840 --> 01:24:28,119
and sent her a bunch of texts
on Instagram? Is that right? Well

1101
01:24:28,119 --> 01:24:30,640
now, and now I'm not gonna
know that I know she's of age.

1102
01:24:30,720 --> 01:24:33,840
Yeah, you better delete those real
fast, dude. Yeah, yeah,

1103
01:24:33,920 --> 01:24:39,039
she's weird looking at Oh these must
be the Megan's right here. Yeah,

1104
01:24:39,479 --> 01:24:42,600
okay, yeah, because one of
them was the dance did all the dancing,

1105
01:24:42,600 --> 01:24:45,800
and one of them did a lot
of the stunt work. And one

1106
01:24:45,840 --> 01:24:48,520
of them, I know, there
was a couple of my fingers. Maybe

1107
01:24:48,520 --> 01:24:53,479
that's her in the little that's right
there, and then that's yeah, little

1108
01:24:53,520 --> 01:24:57,039
Megan, and that's the other little
Megan that one. I sent Estra,

1109
01:24:57,279 --> 01:24:59,920
little estra picture of that little girl
in the movie. I go, Hey,

1110
01:25:00,159 --> 01:25:02,960
the job in this fucking Megan movie? Yeah, looks like little lest

1111
01:25:04,760 --> 01:25:06,680
I liked it, though, dude, that was not a bad movie.

1112
01:25:06,760 --> 01:25:10,720
That was that was funny. It
was like the modern version of Chucky or

1113
01:25:10,760 --> 01:25:16,880
something like that. Um yeah,
yeah, it was like a TikTok Chucky.

1114
01:25:16,960 --> 01:25:20,600
That's what that ship should have been
called, TikTok Checker. What do

1115
01:25:20,640 --> 01:25:23,399
you think? I know, we
were talking about this in a text.

1116
01:25:23,640 --> 01:25:30,279
What do you think? I Alison
Williams. Boy, I've a whole I

1117
01:25:30,279 --> 01:25:33,680
think she's a good actress. You
know, let me just say this.

1118
01:25:34,199 --> 01:25:41,399
I think she's a strong woman.
I think a strong woman. I'm digging

1119
01:25:41,439 --> 01:25:44,319
myself out of the hole. I'm
about to jump in. I think she's

1120
01:25:44,319 --> 01:25:46,079
a strong woman. If she's a
mother, she's a fucking god damn good

1121
01:25:46,159 --> 01:25:49,840
mother. I'll tell you that she's
not. You will be one day.

1122
01:25:50,119 --> 01:25:53,199
She grew up with a lot of
money, but you know what, she

1123
01:25:53,600 --> 01:26:00,560
has a fucking strong ass woman,
got her own fucking identity and for her

1124
01:26:00,960 --> 01:26:05,239
Okay, d He says, I
jostled, I jostlate in and out.

1125
01:26:05,720 --> 01:26:10,880
Is she hot or is she not? Because sometimes she kind of looks like

1126
01:26:10,920 --> 01:26:15,399
this manly kind of UFC kind of
fighter thing. Yeah, and I'm way

1127
01:26:15,479 --> 01:26:18,079
into that. And then sometimes she
looks like a beautiful woman. I'm like,

1128
01:26:21,680 --> 01:26:28,000
did you watch that? Sometimes she's
fucking very masculine jawline, and she

1129
01:26:28,079 --> 01:26:32,239
can kind of got a little too
skinny for me. I'm fine with the

1130
01:26:32,319 --> 01:26:35,800
fucking under bipe a little too skinny. I don't I like a nice sticky

1131
01:26:36,119 --> 01:26:40,479
I don't like I'm a skinny guy, So I don't like two skeletons fucking

1132
01:26:40,520 --> 01:26:43,359
will start fire. I don't need
that shit in my life. Have you

1133
01:26:43,399 --> 01:26:46,039
ever did you watch that show Girls
with her? I loved her on that

1134
01:26:46,279 --> 01:26:48,479
and her character, And this is
what I was saying. I wanted,

1135
01:26:48,520 --> 01:26:53,239
do you remember that episode that like
cold opened with her just getting her ass

1136
01:26:53,279 --> 01:26:57,840
eaten, and the kids want to
remember it. It's the only thing that's

1137
01:26:57,920 --> 01:27:01,560
keeping her in the hot pile.
An it's time. There's it's fifty fifty

1138
01:27:01,600 --> 01:27:06,119
of yes she's hot or no she
isn't. Uh. Then I go right,

1139
01:27:06,199 --> 01:27:10,880
and then I go bad. But
there was a yeah, bro,

1140
01:27:12,159 --> 01:27:15,800
how did they film this? How? Because you look at that dude,

1141
01:27:15,840 --> 01:27:17,800
he's really in there. I mean, I know she's got covered up probably,

1142
01:27:17,880 --> 01:27:20,800
but there's no way that's not invasive
and something, you know what I

1143
01:27:20,800 --> 01:27:27,039
mean, the greatest uh, one
of the biggest fucking uh am. I

1144
01:27:27,119 --> 01:27:29,800
right, wasn't this a cold open
too? I remember it? Just like

1145
01:27:29,960 --> 01:27:32,399
opening on her, her just getting
her asset. It's one of the bigger

1146
01:27:32,399 --> 01:27:35,880
Emmy snubs in my life that I
come up from. Wait, who him

1147
01:27:35,960 --> 01:27:45,279
or her? Just the scene?
I mean probably her because he's not acting.

1148
01:27:45,840 --> 01:27:46,920
You know, we should you know, we should do, Jason,

1149
01:27:47,359 --> 01:27:53,239
maybe even just do a podcast,
subscription only podcasts where we review sex scenes

1150
01:27:53,439 --> 01:27:59,199
and uh in movies, sex scenes
in movies. Yeah, how fun would

1151
01:27:59,199 --> 01:28:01,000
that be? I do? Yeah, I would do it. I mean

1152
01:28:01,079 --> 01:28:06,279
for real, that's but and sometimes
I go, man, she she is

1153
01:28:06,319 --> 01:28:12,640
just some about her is I find
extremely attractive and then other times ago,

1154
01:28:13,159 --> 01:28:15,960
oh man, I can't believe.
I just fucking was really vibing on how

1155
01:28:16,039 --> 01:28:19,319
hot she is because I can write
there, Oh wait a minute, now,

1156
01:28:19,439 --> 01:28:23,039
I'm fucking now I'm in there.
Some other women there like that,

1157
01:28:23,640 --> 01:28:26,760
who well, you know what.
They had a very famous episode of the

1158
01:28:26,800 --> 01:28:32,520
Office about this with um. Kate
Blanchett is one. You know her,

1159
01:28:32,640 --> 01:28:36,079
Kate Blanchett. She's like, sometimes
she can be attractive and sometimes she's just

1160
01:28:36,239 --> 01:28:42,119
very plain looking. Meryl Street.
I've seen her when she was hot Meryl

1161
01:28:42,159 --> 01:28:46,760
Street, and then she's also just
kind of weird. Um. The girl

1162
01:28:46,840 --> 01:28:54,520
that was in that fucking uh Showtime
show about espionage, Amy Adams is one

1163
01:28:54,560 --> 01:28:59,000
I would say, who's sometimes like
hot to me and sometimes down for Amy

1164
01:28:59,039 --> 01:29:01,359
Adams. I'm always down Amy Adams. Yeah, yeah, yeah, who's

1165
01:29:02,079 --> 01:29:09,640
that show Showtime show about espionage?
Oh? Oh oh no, she Claire

1166
01:29:09,720 --> 01:29:14,239
Danes. Oh she's beautiful, No, dude, she's beautiful sometime Homeland,

1167
01:29:14,319 --> 01:29:17,880
right, Homeland, Homeland. I'm
definitely talking about Clarid Claire Danes. There's

1168
01:29:17,960 --> 01:29:23,000
time I'm just saying, there's times
where I go well on that show.

1169
01:29:23,039 --> 01:29:26,960
They made her look like straight.
I mean think about like, uh the

1170
01:29:26,640 --> 01:29:34,800
maybe maybe the most beautiful woman ever
is is uh uh oh Charlie's the room

1171
01:29:34,920 --> 01:29:41,159
right and oh yes, and she
remember how she looked in that movie Monster

1172
01:29:42,000 --> 01:29:46,399
like she looked her when she was
at her a game. I've never wanted

1173
01:29:46,399 --> 01:29:49,279
to fit something, and that's what
Claire Danes is doing in Homeland. I

1174
01:29:49,319 --> 01:29:54,520
mean she's she looks like shit in
that show. But man, when she

1175
01:29:54,600 --> 01:29:57,840
was in that Shop Girl movie.
You ever see her in Shop Girl with

1176
01:29:58,039 --> 01:30:02,239
U? I love? I went, dude, I went to a a

1177
01:30:02,439 --> 01:30:08,239
screening of shop Girl and I got
a free book from going to it,

1178
01:30:08,359 --> 01:30:12,840
and Steve Martin was there and he
read a bunch of fucking uh excerpts from

1179
01:30:12,960 --> 01:30:15,239
and shit like that. Yeah,
yeah, she right there. You know

1180
01:30:15,239 --> 01:30:19,760
where it was that um sitting a
rama dum. Oh man, I'm dude.

1181
01:30:19,800 --> 01:30:24,560
That place is still closed. Dude, They're they're reopening it really eventually.

1182
01:30:24,560 --> 01:30:27,840
It's been whole pointed when I get
out there, what isn't much isn't

1183
01:30:27,880 --> 01:30:30,319
closed. But yeah, well you
know what you know the one that really

1184
01:30:30,479 --> 01:30:34,119
do you ever go? That one
in Culver City? Uh? That yeah,

1185
01:30:34,199 --> 01:30:38,960
it used it used to be another
arc light the Yeah, right by

1186
01:30:38,960 --> 01:30:41,760
the Sony studios. Yeah yeah,
yeah, yeah, that one got bought

1187
01:30:41,800 --> 01:30:45,640
by Amazon and Amazon is using it
for premieres and they're also just showing movies

1188
01:30:45,680 --> 01:30:48,239
there, like it's a regular movie
house by Amazon. Ball. That movie

1189
01:30:48,279 --> 01:30:51,159
theater has a bar in it.
Yeah, it's really nice. Yeah,

1190
01:30:51,199 --> 01:30:54,760
it's a super dope theater. Yeah
I could. My sister I used to

1191
01:30:54,760 --> 01:30:57,760
be to walk to that from her
old place. Oh right, yeah,

1192
01:30:57,800 --> 01:31:00,279
that's where I am now, you
know, And that's right. Yeah,

1193
01:31:00,279 --> 01:31:04,119
you're right over Oh I almost said
a fuck. I almost really said a

1194
01:31:04,279 --> 01:31:09,399
very specific restaurant that's right by your
place. It's all right, what shramp

1195
01:31:09,399 --> 01:31:14,159
and beer or whatever that with a
lobster and beer? I love? I

1196
01:31:14,199 --> 01:31:15,439
mean I can walk there. It's
right down the street. Yeah. Do

1197
01:31:15,560 --> 01:31:19,640
you go there? Yeah? No, I love that place. You took

1198
01:31:19,640 --> 01:31:23,079
me there the first time. I
was taking you back one time after.

1199
01:31:23,119 --> 01:31:26,279
That's right that I did that place
at the bomb. I was gonna say

1200
01:31:26,319 --> 01:31:29,840
Overland Cafe. Oh yeah, is
that place good? My girl has a

1201
01:31:29,880 --> 01:31:31,359
beef for that place. She says
she doesn't like it, but other people

1202
01:31:31,359 --> 01:31:34,319
have told me it's good. Dude, it's being fucking five. He used

1203
01:31:34,359 --> 01:31:39,560
to be a good brunch spot.
There's a bunch of things. It's just

1204
01:31:39,600 --> 01:31:43,079
not I do. This place just
isn't as walkable as West Hollywood was.

1205
01:31:43,279 --> 01:31:45,880
I do miss being in or like
down on Melrose. I really liked that

1206
01:31:45,880 --> 01:31:50,199
neighborhood because I can walk a lot
more. Yeah, but it's so shady

1207
01:31:50,359 --> 01:31:54,399
is it shady on the West Side? Still shady? What do you mean?

1208
01:31:54,439 --> 01:31:59,720
Shade like? And shit? But
the homelessness, it's not too bad.

1209
01:32:00,279 --> 01:32:04,399
It's not too bad. It's not
like Hollywood, but it's right right

1210
01:32:04,800 --> 01:32:10,079
too. Yeah. Shop Girl was
a good movie. I just look at

1211
01:32:10,079 --> 01:32:14,000
pictures of Claire Days and that she's
hot. It took a fantastic book,

1212
01:32:14,039 --> 01:32:17,439
and it was so cool because I
was right by the you know when you

1213
01:32:17,479 --> 01:32:20,520
had those arc like points and ship
and you, Oh dude, I had

1214
01:32:20,600 --> 01:32:24,319
so many of them. Man,
hey, there's a screening it blah blah

1215
01:32:24,319 --> 01:32:27,199
blah. If you want to go, if you have your membership, you

1216
01:32:27,199 --> 01:32:30,079
could go to all these screenings.
Love and I was right around the corner,

1217
01:32:30,119 --> 01:32:33,079
So I go. Fuck. First
of all, I love Steve Martin.

1218
01:32:33,199 --> 01:32:35,560
Second of all, I get free
copy of the book. So that's

1219
01:32:35,560 --> 01:32:39,319
why the movie. I went to
a bunch of those, dude. Yeah,

1220
01:32:39,359 --> 01:32:42,000
those were great comes out and it
didn't say Steve Martin was gonna be

1221
01:32:42,039 --> 01:32:45,239
there, and like the movie came
out in five days, you got to

1222
01:32:45,279 --> 01:32:49,880
see it cool before there. Steve
Martin reads a bunch of fucking shit play

1223
01:32:49,880 --> 01:32:55,000
It was awesome. I totally went
by myself, and then I've done it.

1224
01:32:55,039 --> 01:32:58,279
I did it probably every time IRA
went was by myself to those screenings.

1225
01:32:58,680 --> 01:33:00,760
The more the older I get them, where I'm starting to be like

1226
01:33:00,880 --> 01:33:02,119
fun, I always think about that. Fuck man, I don't want to

1227
01:33:02,159 --> 01:33:06,720
be like fucking shop girl, some
fucking sixty five year old guy that falls

1228
01:33:06,720 --> 01:33:09,760
in love with some thirty year old
girl and goes, you know what,

1229
01:33:10,319 --> 01:33:15,079
maybe in another lifetime, but that
is just a little too old. Give

1230
01:33:15,159 --> 01:33:18,920
you what you need. I'm good
for his money. You don't want to

1231
01:33:19,000 --> 01:33:25,279
suck this fucking California raising baby whatever. You know. I just was in

1232
01:33:25,439 --> 01:33:30,439
province. Yeah, yeah, Steve
Martin's a good writer, dude. I

1233
01:33:30,479 --> 01:33:33,479
really loved his that born Born standing
up. Did you read that? That

1234
01:33:33,600 --> 01:33:38,319
was so good? Yeah? Have
you ever wrote red cruel shoes or red

1235
01:33:38,840 --> 01:33:42,479
pure dribble? No, pure drivel? Though, I've heard is really good.

1236
01:33:42,520 --> 01:33:46,880
I haven't read Johnny Get out Here. It's wonderful and it's perfect for

1237
01:33:46,960 --> 01:33:51,119
a book for you, you know
what I mean, because I know you

1238
01:33:51,159 --> 01:33:55,600
can't read well. And it's got
a lot of pictures and sound pretty old,

1239
01:33:55,680 --> 01:33:58,199
right, isn't that? Isn't that
an old one like from the nineties

1240
01:33:58,279 --> 01:34:02,760
or something pure Well, Cruel Shoes
might even be from the fucking seventies,

1241
01:34:02,800 --> 01:34:08,840
but it's Cruel Shoes was just is
just a bunch of our eighties old.

1242
01:34:09,399 --> 01:34:14,800
Each chapter is just a different short
story. And that's what That's what Pure

1243
01:34:14,840 --> 01:34:17,840
Dribble is too, right, And
then Pure Dribble like ten years later or

1244
01:34:17,880 --> 01:34:20,279
something, and then maybe twenty years
later, hold on, let me look

1245
01:34:20,279 --> 01:34:27,479
at the New Yorker had him do
one kind of like a yeah, Pure

1246
01:34:27,560 --> 01:34:31,920
Dribble came out in ninety eight,
go about cruel Shoes. Um, let

1247
01:34:32,000 --> 01:34:35,520
me see, okay. Then he
did something called Picasso before this, he

1248
01:34:35,560 --> 01:34:43,399
did Picasso at lapine Gial something like
that. Um, hold on, hold

1249
01:34:43,439 --> 01:34:46,199
on, let me just do Steve
Martin. But anyway, so then he

1250
01:34:46,239 --> 01:34:51,279
did Pure Dribble was another short story
every month in the New Yorker. And

1251
01:34:51,319 --> 01:34:55,800
then at the end, they just
put it all into a book. So

1252
01:34:55,880 --> 01:35:04,319
each each chapter is like five six
pages and it's just one autonomous short story

1253
01:35:04,439 --> 01:35:09,600
seventy seven. Okay, so both
of those are just kind of short story

1254
01:35:09,600 --> 01:35:13,479
collections, but the end both of
them are wonderfully funny. But one of

1255
01:35:13,520 --> 01:35:26,600
my favorite ones was in Pure Drivel
was the Times Roman font period has been

1256
01:35:26,720 --> 01:35:30,159
kidnapped? Where can be? And
you realize that the whole story is written.

1257
01:35:30,159 --> 01:35:33,159
It's the only story in the book
that's written in Times Roman and he

1258
01:35:33,279 --> 01:35:38,920
never uses a period one time in
fucking three pages because it was kidnapped.

1259
01:35:39,880 --> 01:35:43,520
It's great. It's a little cute, fucking shit like that. One of

1260
01:35:43,520 --> 01:35:47,159
them was like um called side effects, I think, and it was something

1261
01:35:47,199 --> 01:35:54,960
like for minor back pain, take
two of these warning some side effects and

1262
01:35:55,039 --> 01:35:59,640
it's four fucking pages of the most
ridiculous side effects. One of them like

1263
01:35:59,720 --> 01:36:01,640
the if the one end is minor
back paint, which is what you took

1264
01:36:01,640 --> 01:36:08,439
this ship for. That's really funny. That's a bro I love. I

1265
01:36:08,560 --> 01:36:11,560
love stuff like that that plays with
the format of you know, it's not

1266
01:36:11,720 --> 01:36:15,600
just you'll you will love it Pure
Drivel. You almost could have it like

1267
01:36:15,640 --> 01:36:18,720
the kind of book on the back
of your toilet, because each fucking chapter

1268
01:36:18,800 --> 01:36:21,239
is like four pages, you know
what I mean. That's one thing I

1269
01:36:21,279 --> 01:36:25,960
never understood these people who are reading
like books while they shit, Like how

1270
01:36:25,960 --> 01:36:30,600
long are you shitting? I never
understood that. I'm not If I'm going

1271
01:36:30,680 --> 01:36:35,600
to do an activity while I'm shitting, the maximum I would do, maybe

1272
01:36:35,640 --> 01:36:43,159
make a small three three course meal
maximum, you know, omelet, maybe

1273
01:36:43,199 --> 01:36:46,239
nothing. I guess depends at the
time and day. The smell doesn't bother

1274
01:36:46,279 --> 01:36:49,960
you, Well, I shouldn't be
kitchen a lot is my whole fucking thing.

1275
01:36:50,720 --> 01:36:54,880
Dude. Did I tell you that
I found just punching them off and

1276
01:36:54,960 --> 01:36:57,920
just pinching them off in the sink
down the garbage disposal? How does that

1277
01:36:57,960 --> 01:37:01,079
work? Yeah, it's a small
place, But um, did I tell

1278
01:37:01,079 --> 01:37:08,079
you that I found a fucking sweet, fucking nine bedroom no bathroom? I

1279
01:37:08,119 --> 01:37:11,840
mean not fucking fucked up the joke. Goddamn it, it's first time I've

1280
01:37:11,880 --> 01:37:14,279
told it. Well that's actually first
Yeah, that's first time. I upset

1281
01:37:14,359 --> 01:37:16,680
it. Could texted it. Try
it again, do a second take of

1282
01:37:16,720 --> 01:37:20,439
this. Johnny edited all this out
so you don't even know. Johnny,

1283
01:37:20,600 --> 01:37:24,960
did I tell you I found a
fucking sweet apartment, nine bathroom, no

1284
01:37:25,119 --> 01:37:32,520
bedroom. Turns out it's a YMCA, but the price is right. That's

1285
01:37:32,560 --> 01:37:36,159
fine. I'm trying to think.
It's been so long since we talked.

1286
01:37:36,199 --> 01:37:40,279
I'm trying to there's been so much
has happened. We just kind of have

1287
01:37:40,359 --> 01:37:44,920
to give up on some of the
older sports stuff. Uh yeah, preserve

1288
01:37:45,000 --> 01:37:45,840
what we got to do it?
Should we do it? I don't even

1289
01:37:45,880 --> 01:37:47,560
know if I want to say that. Well, you know, I want

1290
01:37:47,560 --> 01:37:50,079
to tell you. I'll tell you
about that after I got an idea about

1291
01:37:50,079 --> 01:37:55,319
that. Oh okay, that's great, And I want to do one last

1292
01:37:55,359 --> 01:38:00,399
thing Johnny, and then and then
we can go. I'm gonna take this

1293
01:38:00,479 --> 01:38:04,680
over from the top. Let's start
right back from the top. Guys,

1294
01:38:04,840 --> 01:38:09,199
welcome to puntract. No. I
want to send a big fucking shout out,

1295
01:38:09,680 --> 01:38:12,039
end of the season, end of
the career, end of an era

1296
01:38:12,880 --> 01:38:15,760
um to all the people of red
Zone red Zone. After fucking I think

1297
01:38:16,039 --> 01:38:21,359
seventeen seasons is over. TV's losing
the NFL contract. I worked there at

1298
01:38:21,399 --> 01:38:26,960
the beginning. Amazon is not apparently
doing a red zone, So if you

1299
01:38:27,000 --> 01:38:29,840
want to watch the Red Zone channel, your only option will be the NFL

1300
01:38:30,000 --> 01:38:34,199
network. Um, I worked with
Andrew for the first he's a he's got

1301
01:38:34,319 --> 01:38:36,760
like a million jobs, right,
so he's ah, God, the guy's

1302
01:38:36,800 --> 01:38:42,840
like that fucking yeah, he's like
a fucking immigrant Puerto Rican right off the

1303
01:38:42,840 --> 01:38:47,600
boat for eleven jobs. You know, he's never not working. Um,

1304
01:38:47,640 --> 01:38:50,319
that's such a shame that they're just
like you know, it makes me think

1305
01:38:50,399 --> 01:38:56,960
Jason of when Letterman retired and that
they were just taking his set out and

1306
01:38:57,119 --> 01:38:59,920
smashing it up in the street to
load it up into the back of the

1307
01:39:00,119 --> 01:39:04,640
was like pictures of them that set, that beautiful set that I looked at

1308
01:39:04,640 --> 01:39:10,000
for decades, that beautiful Letterman set
like and I would love that. I

1309
01:39:10,000 --> 01:39:13,479
would kill to have those souvenirs.
Somebody didn't want to save this for to

1310
01:39:13,479 --> 01:39:15,159
put in a warehouse or something,
just to happen a square, just to

1311
01:39:15,279 --> 01:39:18,800
square off of the wall of anything. And they were just they were just

1312
01:39:18,840 --> 01:39:23,760
breaking it up and throwing it into
a back of a garbage herself wasn't able

1313
01:39:23,800 --> 01:39:27,800
to be there for the last show. Direct left on the last two seasons,

1314
01:39:27,960 --> 01:39:30,159
but I said, Andrew a fucking
cool message me and are going to

1315
01:39:30,239 --> 01:39:34,760
go and Daniel William mother to the
other two guys that had my job,

1316
01:39:34,840 --> 01:39:40,399
my position with me, Uh,
we're gonna go get a fucking couple of

1317
01:39:40,439 --> 01:39:44,319
cocktails when I come out there and
talk some shit, so I might have

1318
01:39:44,439 --> 01:39:48,680
some good, interesting NFL news after
that, because I tell secrets. Tell

1319
01:39:48,720 --> 01:39:54,560
me something that I'm telling anybody,
I'll make I'll add to it, you

1320
01:39:54,640 --> 01:39:57,359
know, I'll add to it.
You know. I'm like, hey,

1321
01:39:57,399 --> 01:40:00,279
what do you think about fucking Sean
McVeagh, And he's like, he's cool

1322
01:40:00,319 --> 01:40:02,520
guy, bam next week on the
show, and you're selling out and told

1323
01:40:02,520 --> 01:40:12,479
me mcbaya's coke all McVay slapped Dana
White's wife after she he slapped her.

1324
01:40:12,800 --> 01:40:16,079
Well, that was a crazy video, wasn't it pretty weird? I quickly

1325
01:40:16,119 --> 01:40:21,800
that went away, isn't it?
Yeah? Yeah, he just did anything

1326
01:40:23,079 --> 01:40:27,079
he did. He get punished by
anything. I mean, he's skating.

1327
01:40:27,159 --> 01:40:31,159
Huh. He really stated on that
he kind of skated. Here's the ironic

1328
01:40:31,239 --> 01:40:35,760
twist. You know what they put
on pause. He's slapping in the face

1329
01:40:35,880 --> 01:40:42,720
league, Oh are you serious?
It was like about to drop a week

1330
01:40:43,199 --> 01:40:45,840
later and then he's practicing that.
That's what I would have said. I've

1331
01:40:45,840 --> 01:40:51,399
been like, I was just practicing
about Oh my god, it's like you

1332
01:40:51,439 --> 01:40:54,800
can't even do jokes about it,
can you, Jason, Because this kid.

1333
01:40:55,039 --> 01:40:58,399
I've been trying. I've been trying. The only thing I can really

1334
01:40:58,399 --> 01:41:00,000
come up with is that that kind
of angle. But I'm like, I

1335
01:41:00,039 --> 01:41:03,399
was just doing a promo for his
show. You just the camera caught it

1336
01:41:03,439 --> 01:41:08,760
on the back end. It's like
one of those things that's too ironic or

1337
01:41:09,119 --> 01:41:12,359
too you know, just too surreal
to make a joke. Even the reality

1338
01:41:12,439 --> 01:41:15,319
is so strange that he he must
have just been, you know, brought

1339
01:41:15,399 --> 01:41:23,880
his work home with him. You
did it. You did it, of

1340
01:41:23,880 --> 01:41:29,439
course, Jason did it exactly cracked
cracked Nia. Yeah, well you don't

1341
01:41:29,439 --> 01:41:32,159
know myself, all right, Johnny, Well, let's do a pod this

1342
01:41:32,199 --> 01:41:38,279
week. That's a fun. Let's
do one wig after the supermoment. I'll

1343
01:41:38,279 --> 01:41:41,399
tell you about this after well,
we'll do a new punch dunk. I

1344
01:41:41,399 --> 01:41:43,880
think Thursday is Thursday, good day
for you to do it every week.

1345
01:41:44,000 --> 01:41:46,239
Thursday is great for me, okay, because I think that works for Sam

1346
01:41:46,279 --> 01:41:49,720
too. And I'm gonna get you
golf and when I come out there,

1347
01:41:50,359 --> 01:41:54,680
all right, you guys, Hey, guys, we'll do one before the

1348
01:41:54,760 --> 01:41:59,960
stay on j stay on that first
stop, stay on after I stopped recording?

1349
01:42:00,560 --> 01:42:05,600
Say what but he say on after
your chef? All right? Um

1350
01:42:05,640 --> 01:42:09,640
so guys, we don't get one
in before. If it doesn't air before

1351
01:42:09,640 --> 01:42:13,199
the super Bowl, everybody enjoy your
super Bowl, make a lot of bets,

1352
01:42:13,239 --> 01:42:19,239
get very drunk and don't get in
any trouble and suck it. What

1353
01:42:19,399 --> 01:42:32,680
did they think? Every girls my
girlfriend, every girl's my girlfriend, every

1354
01:42:32,760 --> 01:42:38,680
good? It deserted me. I'm
a Sam loved this song. He dances

1355
01:42:38,720 --> 01:42:50,680
like yeah, special needs? What
are I say? Dobby Stock leather Rock,

1356
01:42:57,039 --> 01:43:01,119
He's our kids. We're supporting now
if you are, if you're a

1357
01:43:01,239 --> 01:43:09,560
drunk puncher, buy the problem.
If you want to find this uh and

1358
01:43:09,760 --> 01:43:15,039
buy it to keep with me high
let's get busy. As the name of

1359
01:43:15,039 --> 01:43:25,880
the albums my girlfriend. If you
drss my girlfriend, I'm gonna make I'm

1360
01:43:25,880 --> 01:43:29,399
gonna put this a vote. Should
this be the new punch trunk? Uh? Themes