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Callaroga Shark Media. Hi, I'm
Johnny mack with your daily comedy and who's

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some fun jokes from Jimmy Fallon.
First, Chipotle is selling a new Chipotle

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Boy Bowl aimed at finance bros.
It's a normal bull, but instead of

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building it yourself, your dad just
hands it to you. Love it.

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Another one, a woman in Maryland
brought a vase at a thrift store for

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four dollars that turned out to be
a two thousand year old Mayan artifact.

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Experts were like, you're either rich
or cursed. Listener Richard actually sent that

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over as an item for five Good
News Stories that'll be showing up on that

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podcast, which I also host Five
Good News Stories where you get your pods?

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Did Jerry Seinfeld listen to last week's
podcast and take advice from Johnny macko?

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And Hey, my Heckel game is
pretty weak. I better step it

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up because Jerry this time came prepared. Another group of pro Palestine Heckler showed

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up at a show in Australia,
and this time Jerry had material. Let's

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listen. Oh you're bye, they're
by, the contesters are by, Why

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miss you? Oh you're not doing
well, it's so hard for you.

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You gotta guest. Listen, dude, listen, listen. Let me explain

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something. You and I are in
the same business. We're in the same

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business. Our business is to get
people to see things the way we see

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it. The problem is you're in
the wrong place. Do you hear how

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well I'm doing. This is what
you want? You want to do well

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like I am. Look at the
people here to hear me. Look at

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what happened to you. I look
because context is very important for your message.

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For example, if I was going
to do my little comedy show that

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I do. If I went to
a Australian rules rugby game and I told

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this guy I love this guy.
If I said to this guy, you

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check out, I'm gonna do my
comedy act here, I would get that

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same reaction. I would get kicked
out on my ass because that's not where

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I blow. Here's the other thing
I think you need to go back and

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tell who's ever running your organization.
We just gave more money to a jew.

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That cannot be a good plan for
you. That's not what you want.

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That's the whole problem. That you
gotta come up with a better plan.

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Now that was clearly rehearsed. Jerry
was ready for that one, so

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he stepped up his game. Hey
is Michael Jay leaving Saturday Night Live?

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Let me answer No, he does
this every year. Last week he posted

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a rather cryptic Instagram story that had
some fans wondering if he was leaving SNL.

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On an otherwise blank post, he
wrote, I'm a full time stand

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up comedian again. Some think he's
hinting that SNL is no longer his full

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time job. Others are like,
it's summer, He's a full time stand

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up comedian. We'll see. I
mean the Jost shape hearing has been so

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strong. To leave it as we
walk up to the fiftieth anniversary would be

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probably insane. Do one more year
with Jost, take the victory lap,

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then get out to get out now
is crazy? That would just be crazy.

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Mark Norman has a new short documentary
for Punch Up Live. We get

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to see Mark Norman working on a
joke from the first time he tried it

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to all the way to doing it
at Carnegie Hall. The eight hundred pound

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Gerilla Websites spoke with Mark and said, do you get the impression that audiences

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are generally unaware of just how painstaking
the process is. For one joke,

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Norman said, oh, one hundred
percent. It's so much to do about

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word choice and trial and error,
and hey, I thought this would work.

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Let me say this line. Maybe
that'll trigger something. It's not pretty.

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Was there pressure or fear with showing
yourself bombing and having to live through

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that again? Norman said, well
a little bit. We're shooting another one

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right now. It's so much bombing
and people are like, what the hell.

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I thought this guy had a Netflix
special. This isn't great. I

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thought the bombing part was what people
needed to say, so let's show them

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the nitty gritty. I say,
bombing is work, But then watching yourself

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back just brings up all those feelings. Killing's bad too, by the way,

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just watching yourself suck. So watching
yourself bomb is really heartbreaking. The

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Gorilla said, I can't imagine what
it's like having to edit a special.

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Norman said, oh, yeah,
it's a nightmare. I have a friend

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he did an hour special. It
was so painful for him to watch you

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till the editor just edited. I
can't even look at it. And then

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he looked at it later and it
was like, oh, shoot. I

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should have watched it, so you
have to do it, but it's painful.

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Conan O'Brien is set to make a
cameo in If I Had Legs,

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I'd Kick You. The New York
Times describes the upcoming part as a dramatic

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cameo. If I Had Legs,
I'd Kick You was a comedy drama set

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to star Rose Byrne. The film
follows a therapist and mother on Long Island

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who must navigate her child's mysterious illness
and absent husband, a demolished home,

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a missing person, and an increase
complicated relationship with her own therapist, all

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while treating her own crisis laden patients. So a dramatic cameo. Does he

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play Conan O'Brien's talk show host Conan's
physicality he's rather tall and has a shock

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of red orange hair, it might
be difficult for him to disappear into a

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role we'll see. I have told
Jeff Foxworthy many times I'd like to see

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him go off type and play something
like mean or nasty like Jeff Foxworthy serial

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killer would be amazing. But Jeff
has not taken me up on my advice

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yet. Told you John Stewart's in
a band well Church and State. They're

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working on an album. Singer Rick
Barry, guitarist Andy Bova, bassist Jim

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Bova, drummer John Stewart. Singer
Rick Barry tells Late Night Or we'd been

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working on the songs for some time
now and preparing to do a pop up

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show eventually. Since that's kind of
the whole vibe of Asbury Underground anyway,

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I thought it'd be the perfect event
for us to show up and play somewhere

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unannounced in a non traditional venue.
The folks at Asbury Park Brewery were extremely

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accommodating. Now it's back to the
studio at Simple Sound Studios where we're writing

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and tracking our debut record, so
hopefully everyone keeps an eye out for that.

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John mulaney will narrate the audiobook for
former SNL writer Simon Rich's short story

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collection Glory Days. Glory Days is
a collection of stories the chronicles the plight

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of aging millennials. The story's encapsulate
a variety of perspectives, such as a

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forty year old super Mario who must
take a stock of his life, as

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well as the trials of participation trophy
reminiscing about how they were won by a

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jubilant Athmatic. In a statement,
Rich tells people, I've been a John

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Malaney superfan since the day we met
at SNL in two thousand and eight.

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He's the funniest person on the planet. I think he should read the audio

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version of every book, even the
super intense religious ones run on. Hirschberg

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will have a special next week Comedy
Dynamics will released It Could Have Been Better,

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theo D July second album version July
fifth. It Could Have Been Better

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is his fourth special overall, and
the second in two months. On June

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twentieth, the comic took to YouTube
to debut his third hour Brave, taped

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to the Comedy Seller in New York
City. Also from Late Nighter, Sarah

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Sherman described her Weekend Update appearance as
RFK Junior's Rainworm. Sarah said, this

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season, I tried at different things
that were new to me. I wanted

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to push myself to be like,
what if I saw something in the news

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that week and try to write for
it and do something timely that's new for

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me, and that's like the challenge
of the show. I saw the new

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story and I immediately texted every single
member of Weekend Update. I was like,

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I got this one. Come on, y'all, let me do it.

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It's so scared to do something like
that because you only have two days

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in limited time, but you just
feel so supportive because all the writers are

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so funny, everyone's excited for the
challenge. Sarah said, they had me

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try out a costume with no arms, and she said, I think it's

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funnier if I have arms so I
can slurp out of a brain smoothie,

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and that's when the costume department goes
we got this, and then they made

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the really gorgeous worm gloves. Ian
Carmel was said to be the opening act

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on Ellen's upcoming Farewell tour. Those
plans have been scrapped. Let's see if

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you can read between the lines here. Carmel spent the last three months working

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closely with Ellen and says, I
listened to her tell me about her life,

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and tell me about the last four
or five years of her life specifically,

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and try to synthesize that into something
funny and relatable. Okay, it

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was one of the great challenges of
my career, but also super fun.

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Let's really read between the lines.
She's very funny, she's very creative.

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She's very direct in her feedback,
which I appreciate. When the offer came

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through, I couldn't believe it because
you almost don't think of her as human

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because it's Ellen. She's one of
those one namers. I don't know what

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do you think happened? I think
I know what happened, but I'll keep

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it to myself. And that's your
comedy news for today. Enjoy the show,

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Tell a friend about it. They
might like it too. And you

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know in the commercial Free and All
that you've heard me read that fifty times

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and it's a premo and stuff.
You know what to do four ninety nine.

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Click to thanks so Y