1
00:00:02,120 --> 00:00:18,280
Comedy Central Podcast. Thank you very
much. Thank you, thank you,

2
00:00:18,559 --> 00:00:20,640
but I know you' re thinking
the same thing as my cat when he

3
00:00:20,640 --> 00:00:24,079
got home. There' s an
aunt in cones, that' s all

4
00:00:24,079 --> 00:00:27,879
right. I tell you, Paula
calls me and before the pandemic, the

5
00:00:27,879 --> 00:00:31,079
apocalypse, my life was already sad. I puked in a tsar once,

6
00:00:31,879 --> 00:00:36,920
and I was ashamed. Go see
a tsara. They see a total inequality

7
00:00:36,920 --> 00:00:47,039
until they find it. It'
s okay. I mean, it'

8
00:00:47,079 --> 00:00:49,439
s okay. But it was a
tsara and it was a first date.

9
00:00:50,039 --> 00:00:53,159
Eyes on the tip for a period. We were all reed day. I

10
00:00:53,240 --> 00:00:58,399
felt bad and caught what the tsar
is being. And of course it was

11
00:00:58,439 --> 00:01:00,240
a bitch because on the first dates
you go to what you go. I

12
00:01:00,240 --> 00:01:04,920
was throwing up. I mean,
he freaked out, he freaked out,

13
00:01:06,040 --> 00:01:08,120
he had to freak out, I' d think I' d fuck if

14
00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:11,599
on the first date he vomits,
on the second he shits my chest.

15
00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:23,799
It is not true that I understand
that flipaparouclea, because there are things that

16
00:01:23,799 --> 00:01:26,799
need to be trusted with someone else. It is also true that there I

17
00:01:26,879 --> 00:01:30,480
am ashamed of very silly things.
There, for example, I' m

18
00:01:30,560 --> 00:01:34,400
ashamed to go to a public bathroom
and let the others hear what' s

19
00:01:34,400 --> 00:01:38,319
going to fall. So of course
so don' t mean this isn'

20
00:01:38,719 --> 00:01:42,359
t serious. So what I do
is I' ve done a lot of

21
00:01:42,439 --> 00:01:48,319
paper to the cup before to dampen
the sound. You make her also that

22
00:01:48,319 --> 00:01:51,560
you' re out there taking half
a roll, don' t listen to

23
00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:55,000
me, don' t hear me
being human, don' t think I

24
00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:57,040
' ve come to the bathroom to
piss. I haven' t actually been

25
00:01:57,159 --> 00:02:00,560
there before and I' ve given
a lot of time and I' ve

26
00:02:00,560 --> 00:02:02,879
been knocking on the door and I' m so nervous that I didn'

27
00:02:02,879 --> 00:02:04,359
t know what to do at the
end of screaming at me. I'

28
00:02:04,400 --> 00:02:16,840
m getting cocaine in. It'
s cocaine. It' s cocaine,

29
00:02:16,960 --> 00:02:22,360
and they didn' t go in
there. Quick status. It' s

30
00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:25,319
but it' s true that this
system of mine, this trick of mine,

31
00:02:25,719 --> 00:02:30,479
has a problem and it' s
worth it when you' re done,

32
00:02:30,759 --> 00:02:35,840
it' s created like a mass
of pee paper, as well as

33
00:02:35,840 --> 00:02:35,840
the mache paper that doesn' t
swallow, it doesn' t swallow the

34
00:02:35,840 --> 00:02:37,680
chain. It' s worth it. They haven' t heard you do

35
00:02:37,719 --> 00:02:39,800
anything, but whoever comes in later
is going to say that you' ve

36
00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:45,319
fucked up a manuality of enough atac
already this and I what happens manic art

37
00:02:45,319 --> 00:02:49,319
has happened. Shit, shit,
by the way, shit at somebody'

38
00:02:49,319 --> 00:02:51,639
s house. It' s important
to me too, I mean, it

39
00:02:51,639 --> 00:02:53,960
' s embarrassing. I need confidence. For me, shitting at someone'

40
00:02:53,960 --> 00:02:58,240
s house is wedding and if I
have to look out for more paper it

41
00:02:58,319 --> 00:03:01,120
' s church wedding. I mean, this is it, this is law.

42
00:03:02,479 --> 00:03:06,319
Then they say that on the first
dates they say one thing, that

43
00:03:06,319 --> 00:03:07,719
' s that we don' t
have to talk about politics. Never.

44
00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:12,800
It' s not a lie.
Always remain poetic the first date to avoid

45
00:03:12,800 --> 00:03:15,919
that in the second ones it presents
with nautical ones. True, it'

46
00:03:15,919 --> 00:03:23,680
s true, of course, uncle, and that the nautical have lowered points

47
00:03:23,719 --> 00:03:27,039
on the faxometer, that is,
they are, but they' re about

48
00:03:27,039 --> 00:03:30,280
to see sorcery with the braided belt, that is. Anyway, nothing good

49
00:03:30,560 --> 00:03:35,120
happens, like we' re talking
about me and you don' t know

50
00:03:35,120 --> 00:03:38,319
me because nobody knows me. I' m gonna tell you my hobbies.

51
00:03:38,599 --> 00:03:44,120
My favorite hobby is you see research
team. You like research team. If

52
00:03:44,280 --> 00:03:46,560
it' s not cool, not
the cool narcos, it' s cool

53
00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:51,159
with an egg. It is true
that I do not understand why everything related

54
00:03:51,159 --> 00:03:53,520
to the world of drug trafficking has
to bear the word. Narco in front

55
00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:59,719
of you, not like, narco- story, narco- boat, what

56
00:03:59,719 --> 00:04:02,439
a narco- chicken thing to do
there, no, narpe tunnel, okay,

57
00:04:02,759 --> 00:04:15,719
man, you' re a drug
dealer, you' re not Batman,

58
00:04:15,719 --> 00:04:15,719
and when you' re narco-
chicking, I don' t know.

59
00:04:15,120 --> 00:04:18,120
It' s okay, because I
think everything Gloria Serra Mola does not

60
00:04:18,439 --> 00:04:25,199
tell me the narcos peda just like
the narcos waw tell me more about this

61
00:04:25,279 --> 00:04:29,879
issue. I believe that everything Gloria
narrates will improve it. That' s

62
00:04:29,920 --> 00:04:31,600
why I want Gloria to be able
to tell my sentimental life. Man,

63
00:04:31,839 --> 00:04:39,399
you know something like that. We
try to contact him on Instagram, but

64
00:04:39,519 --> 00:04:44,399
he doesn' t want to talk
to us. He' s online,

65
00:04:44,839 --> 00:04:47,879
but he' s not answering us. We repeatedly give him like shit.

66
00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:00,560
I want you to see this and
say so I' m going to do

67
00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:04,560
it. I' ve got to
make my mom some kind of research team.

68
00:05:04,639 --> 00:05:06,600
He likes it a lot, too. We see it together. It

69
00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:10,800
' s true that spoiled lately.
She' s getting a lot on Twitter,

70
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:15,040
she' s missing a lot on
Twitter, and now she' s

71
00:05:15,120 --> 00:05:17,040
trying to be politically correct, she' s cool not to take into account

72
00:05:17,079 --> 00:05:21,120
others and so on, but if
you know how to do it, one

73
00:05:21,240 --> 00:05:25,199
thing happens to her, and she
doesn' t come out and she does

74
00:05:25,279 --> 00:05:28,839
one thing that I think is very
mother- like, that' s when

75
00:05:28,879 --> 00:05:31,720
she suffers what she thinks she can
be controversial and she releases it equally,

76
00:05:31,720 --> 00:05:32,000
but whispering it then, example,
example, make it practical. I'

77
00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:36,040
m going to see her and she' s telling me to talk like that.

78
00:05:36,079 --> 00:05:44,079
My mother is a Dehelio balloon.
My mother, I' ve seen

79
00:05:44,079 --> 00:05:51,160
the neighbors before. The first one
the blacks are black, yes, they

80
00:05:51,160 --> 00:05:54,600
' re black, but it'
s okay, you don' t have

81
00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:56,959
to srrar that they' re black. Then we watch the teleno and he

82
00:05:57,800 --> 00:06:05,600
tells me ay, I really like
this actor is Catalan. It' s

83
00:06:05,720 --> 00:06:08,240
Catalan, yes, it' s
Catalan. Not an x man no,

84
00:06:08,439 --> 00:06:10,920
he doesn' t hear you from
wherever he is. I mean with a

85
00:06:10,959 --> 00:06:14,759
black catalan. My mother who freaks
him out, doesn' t short-

86
00:06:14,879 --> 00:06:18,560
circuit at some point in his head. Another one tells me yesterday I met

87
00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:24,279
your uncle, the divorced one.
And the thing is, it' s

88
00:06:24,279 --> 00:06:26,160
not just my mother, it'
s my mother and my aunt, my

89
00:06:26,160 --> 00:06:30,000
grandmother. Man, you know what
my birthdays are like as a family.

90
00:06:30,120 --> 00:06:32,600
It' s not parties, either, it' s death row meetings.

91
00:06:32,680 --> 00:06:39,800
Man, talking parcel the divorced Catalans
divorced black Catalans. It' s my

92
00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:45,000
mother with a cape, the Harpotts
You know what you' re doing.

93
00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:46,680
I want to make it clear that
my mother is a very cool aunt,

94
00:06:46,920 --> 00:06:48,800
I mean, she' s very
Cooki. My mother knows these people that

95
00:06:48,839 --> 00:06:53,959
when you are Syrian talking and you
finish talking, she screams thanks and leaves

96
00:06:54,000 --> 00:06:57,800
her cell phone as with an offering, just as you are already in there

97
00:06:57,839 --> 00:07:00,680
that I don' t know how
to keep it quiet, that it doesn

98
00:07:00,720 --> 00:07:01,079
' t hurt, because my mother
is yes that kind of people like Cooki

99
00:07:01,079 --> 00:07:03,800
very much. When the machines are
revealed. Not anymore, but right now

100
00:07:03,800 --> 00:07:09,480
it' s how very Cooki,
i e my mother uncle in the machine

101
00:07:09,519 --> 00:07:15,360
rebellion opens him to terminator oh,
come on in, paula opened boy to

102
00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:21,759
see you a robot come meet my
daughter. She' s single. Not

103
00:07:23,279 --> 00:07:26,319
that it is the issue of rebellion
of the machines, that no longer sounds

104
00:07:26,399 --> 00:07:30,360
or crazy, not like they attacked
us machines another Tuesday uncle I don'

105
00:07:30,639 --> 00:07:32,360
t know, calm down I don' t know, nothing happens, but

106
00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:34,079
I don' t. I think
it' s going to be like the

107
00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:38,120
felis, the machine rebellion. I
think it' s gonna happen like the

108
00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:40,279
pandemic, because the pandemic, I
mean, it wasn' t like spalis.

109
00:07:40,360 --> 00:07:43,920
Pandemic movies are always like a hero
who helps everyone, who hunts with

110
00:07:43,920 --> 00:07:47,079
his own hands. Joh In March
she starts an old woman for a Roy

111
00:07:47,079 --> 00:07:49,319
scotex is. I don' t
think it' s gonna be. I

112
00:07:49,360 --> 00:07:51,759
think it' s gonna happen anyway. The machines are going to be revealed,

113
00:07:53,439 --> 00:07:56,920
but wrongly, it will be a
teenage rebellion. Or you will one

114
00:07:56,920 --> 00:08:01,800
day deliver in the kitchen and the
fridge hates you has a subject to ask

115
00:08:01,639 --> 00:08:07,439
to hate even houses. He put
a pishon on a bucket on me.

116
00:08:07,439 --> 00:08:11,839
This kind of historical events as you
have and because of having created many doubts,

117
00:08:11,879 --> 00:08:15,360
as idiots of this type. For
example, the Magi, that is,

118
00:08:15,519 --> 00:08:18,839
the Magi were more kings or more
magicians, which does not mean they

119
00:08:20,120 --> 00:08:24,839
came to the Manger with crown,
with scepter or like Jesus was up to

120
00:08:24,879 --> 00:08:37,720
your letter, By the way,
I found out last year. I didn

121
00:08:37,840 --> 00:08:43,799
' t know the plant that the
myrrh is an abortive plant. I did

122
00:08:43,919 --> 00:08:48,440
not know you alike Mary asked for
a delivery one. I don' t

123
00:08:48,559 --> 00:08:50,480
know good, no, no,
no, it' s okay, since

124
00:08:50,559 --> 00:08:56,000
you' ve brought up the drug
issue and it' s true that I

125
00:08:56,000 --> 00:08:56,240
realize I' m more. I
mean, I' m young, but

126
00:08:56,240 --> 00:09:00,679
I' m getting older because I
used to get high so I could be

127
00:09:00,720 --> 00:09:03,480
partying all night and now I'
m groping so I can be toned up,

128
00:09:03,480 --> 00:09:07,159
stealing. I mean, I started
meds last year I started taking a

129
00:09:07,399 --> 00:09:11,960
depressive mind that nothing happened. It' s okay, no, it'

130
00:09:11,960 --> 00:09:13,080
s okay. It' s like
super normal. But there' s a

131
00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:18,240
detail I didn' t know and
nobody told me, which is that antidepressants

132
00:09:18,279 --> 00:09:28,120
make it very difficult, not to
say impossible to run. Then okay I

133
00:09:28,159 --> 00:09:33,720
' m not a psychiatrist, psychiatrist, lose me otherwise. I don'

134
00:09:33,799 --> 00:09:37,600
t mean I have pressure and they
take my orgasms away. Let' s

135
00:09:37,679 --> 00:09:41,720
not go to the endocrine that deserves
chocolate palms, not one every three hours.

136
00:09:41,840 --> 00:09:43,279
What' s this, man,
what' s this about not being

137
00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:48,159
able to cum, it' s
something like you don' t see it,

138
00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:52,360
like super specific, super son of
a bitch, like to be a

139
00:09:52,360 --> 00:09:52,399
side effect, I mean, it
looks more like a curse. Man,

140
00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:54,639
I don' t think I'
m getting any medication. It gives me

141
00:09:54,720 --> 00:09:58,320
the potion of the bad little mermaid, because I think it' s the

142
00:09:58,360 --> 00:10:09,360
psychiatrist with a cauldron. He'
s got a cauldron in his office.

143
00:10:09,960 --> 00:10:13,840
It' s already with my orgasms. It was a snail. Oh,

144
00:10:18,559 --> 00:10:22,279
gross life. Well, it'
s okay, since we' re talking

145
00:10:22,360 --> 00:10:28,480
about taritas and maybe I have a
complex, a problem with my tits that

146
00:10:28,559 --> 00:10:31,399
I don' t like. I
want them more, I want them to

147
00:10:31,399 --> 00:10:33,960
be bigger, but it is that
it is a complex already level that I

148
00:10:35,039 --> 00:10:39,960
like the ones of femen why they
envy me that is when I see them

149
00:10:41,039 --> 00:10:43,360
I have an internal conflict, because
I think, on the one hand,

150
00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:45,279
I agree with you, on the
other hand, you envy me. On

151
00:10:45,360 --> 00:10:48,759
the one hand, eh aunty touch
with the cause or bitch lake, because

152
00:10:48,799 --> 00:10:50,879
it is very cool I want tits
like I hate them because it gives me

153
00:10:50,960 --> 00:10:54,440
the impression that the bigger your tits
are, the more important the cause that

154
00:10:54,440 --> 00:11:13,480
you can claim exactly in Plan Peace
of the Middle East and I do not

155
00:11:13,639 --> 00:11:20,399
read trees saved to the raccoons.
Well, well, I just think Zuben

156
00:11:20,440 --> 00:11:24,879
' s tits are really cool,
because they can claim several causes at once

157
00:11:24,879 --> 00:11:28,440
not in Plan Box. It'
s patriotism, it' s fascism outside

158
00:11:28,519 --> 00:11:30,879
rosaries of ours or several. How
cool, man that remains for me in

159
00:11:30,919 --> 00:11:33,840
fem in the exclamation, the truth
that closes does more because they no longer

160
00:11:33,919 --> 00:11:37,000
fit people would see me on the
street like I, to femen accept guys

161
00:11:37,320 --> 00:11:54,159
now what little, because nothing I
have thought, started to operate, many

162
00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:58,840
times I have thought for myself,
but pass, that is pass, because

163
00:11:58,919 --> 00:12:05,639
then imagine I will see my mother
and see me will be with someone and

164
00:12:05,679 --> 00:12:11,519
will say oh look. Here comes
my daughter the surgery. Thank you very

165
00:12:11,519 --> 00:12:26,360
much. It' s all been
wonderful.
