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The cheated Juliette extracted from the memoirs
of a retired burglar. The house in

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question was what Peter, the scholar
who corrects my proof sheets, caused one

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of the Ruonesbury sort, the front
facing a street, and the back looking

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over a turfed garden with a lime
tree or two, a labanum, and

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a lawn tennis court marked out its
white lines playing to see in the starlight.

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At the end of the garden,
a door painted dark green led into

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a narrow lane between high walls,
where if two persons met, one had

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to turned sideways to let the other
pass. The entrance to this lane was

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cut in two by a wooden post
about half the height of your hip,

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and just beyond this in the high
road, George was waiting for us with

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the dog cart. We had picked
the usual time, the dinner hour.

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It had just turned dark, and
the church clock two streets away was chiming

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the quarter after eight. When Peter
and I let ourselves in by the green

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door, I spoke of and felt
along the wall for the gardener's ladder that

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we knew was hanging there. A
simpler job there never was the bedroom window

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we had marked on the first floor
stood right open to the night air,

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and inside there was the light of
a candle or two flickering, just as

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a careless maid will leave them after
her mistress has gone down to dinner.

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To be sure there was a chance
of her coming back to put them out.

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But we could hear her voice going
in the servants hall as we lifted

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the ladder and rested it against the
sill. She's good for half an hour,

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yet, Peter whispered, holding the
ladder while I began to climb.

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But if I hear her voice stop, I'll give the signal to be cautious.

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I went up softly, pushed my
head gently above the level of the

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seal, and looked in. It
was a roomy place, with a great

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half tested bed hung with curtains standing
out from the wall on my right.

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The curtains were of chintz, a
dark background with flaming red poppies sprawling over

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it, and the further curtain hid
the dressing table and the candles upon it,

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and the jewel case that I confidently
hoped to stand upon it. Also,

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her bright Brussels carpet covered the floor
and the wallpaper. I remember,

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though, for the life of me, I can't tell why was a pale

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gray ground worked out to imitate waded
silk with sprigs of gilt honeysuckle upon it.

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I looked round and listened for half
a minute. The house was still

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as death up here. Not a
sound in the room, were in the

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passages beyond. With a nod to
Peter to hold the ladder firm, I

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lifted one leg over the sill,
then the other. Dropped my feet carefully

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upon the thick carpet, and went
quickly round the bed to the dressing table.

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But at the corner, and as
soon as ever I saw around the

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chintz curtain, my knees gave way, and I put out a hand toward

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the bed post before the dressing table, and in front of the big glass

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in which she could see my white
face, was an old lady seated.

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She wore a blaze of jewels and
a low gown, out of which rose

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the scraggiest neck and shoulders I ever
looked upon. Her hair was thick with

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black dye and fastened with a diamond
star. The powder between the two candles

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showed her cheek bones like flour on
a miller's coat, chin on hands,

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she was gazing steadily into the mirror
before her, and even in my fright,

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I had time to note a glass
of sherry and a plate of rice

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and curry stood at her elbow among
the rouge pots and powder puffs. While

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I stood stock still and pretty well
scared out of my wits. She rose,

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still staring at my image in the
glass, folded her hands modestly over

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her bosom, and spoke in a
deep tragical voice the prince. Then facing

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sharply around, she held out her
thin arms. You have come at last.

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There wasn't much to say to this
except that I had, so,

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I confessed it. Even with the
candles behind her, I could see her

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eyes glowing like a dog's and an
uglier poor creature this world could scarcely show,

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as the latter set against the window. Since you seem to know,

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ma'am, said I it is ah
Romeo. Your cheeks are ruddy, your

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poppies are too red. Then I
am glad my colors come back for to

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tell the truth, you did give
me a turn, just at first.

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You were looking out for me,
no doubt, my prince. She stretched

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out her arms again, and,
being pretty well at my WIT's end and

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let her embrace me. It has
been too long, she said, Oh,

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the weary while, and they ill
treat me here? Where have you

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been all this tedious time? I
wasn't going to answer that, you may

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be sure. It appeared to me
that twas my right to ask questions rather

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than stand there answering them. If
they've been ill treating you, ma'am said

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I, they shall answer for it, my love, Yes, ma'am.

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Would it be taking a liberty if
I asked their names? There's Gertrude.

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Gertrude's hash is as good as settled, ma'am. I checked off Gertrude on

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my thumb. That's my niece.
For a moment I feared I'd been a

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little too prompt, but she went
on. And next, there's Henry and

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the children who have more than once
made faces at me. And Phipson.

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Phipson's in it too, You know
her, don't I. It surprised me

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a trifle to find that Phipson was
female. Three times to night she pulled

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my hair and the rice she brought
me. Look at it, all stuck

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together and sodden. Phipson shall pay
for it with her blood, My hero,

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my darling. Don't spare Phibson,
she screams bitterly if a pin is

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stuck in her I did, at
once stick her all over with pins.

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By this time I'd begun to guess
what was pretty near the truth that I

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was talking with a mad aunt of
the family below, and that the game

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was in my hands if I played
with decent care. So I brought her

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to face the important question. Look
here, I said, All this shall

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be done when you are out of
their hands. At present, I'm running

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a considerable risk in braving these prosecutors
of Yawn, dearest madam, the latters

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outside, and the carriage waiting.
Hadn't we better? Elope? At once

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she gave a sob and fell on
my arms. Oh is it true?

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Is it true? Pinch me that
I may wake? If this is but

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a happy dream? Are you ready
this moment? There's just one other little

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thing, ma'am. Your jewels.
You won't leave them to your enemies.

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I suppose this was the dangerous moment, and I felt a twitch of the

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nerse as I watched her face to
see how she would take the suggestion.

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But the poor silly soul turned up
her eyes to mine, all full of

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tears and confidence. Dearest, I
am old, old. Had you come

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earlier, my beauty had not wanted
jewels to set it off, But now

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I must wear them to look my
best as your bride. She hid her

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face in her hands for a second, then turned to the dressing table,

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lifted her jewel case and put it
into my hands. I am ready,

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she repeated. Let us be quick
and stealthy as death. She followed me

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to the window, and looking out
your back, what horrible black deaths.

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It's as easy, said I as
pye. You could do it on your

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head. Look here. I climbed
out first and helped her, setting her

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feet on the wrongs. We went
down in silence, I choking with laughter

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all the way at the sight of
Peter below, who was looking with his

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mouth open and his lips too weak
to meet on the curses of wonderment that

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arose from the depths of him.
When I touched the turf and handed him

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the jewel case, he took it
like a man in a trance. We

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put the latter back in its place
and stole over the turf together, But

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outside the garden door, Peter could
stand no more of it. I've a

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firearm in my pocket, whispered he
pulling up, and I'm going to fire

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it off to relieve my feelings if
you don't explain here and now, who

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in Pity's name is she? You
mug? She's the original sleeping beauty.

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I'm eloping with her, and you've
got her jewels. Pardon me, jem,

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he says in his gentlemanly way,
if you don't quite see, are

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you taking off to melt her or
marry her? For how to get rid

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of her else? The poor old
c reacher had halted too, three paces

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ahead of us, and waited while
we whispered with the moonlight that slanted down

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into the lane, whitening her bare
neck and flashing in her jewels. One

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moment, I said, and stepped
forward to her. You had better take

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off those ornaments here, my dear, and give them to my servant to

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take care of. There's a carriage
waiting for us at the end of the

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lane, and when he has stoked
them under the seat, we can climb

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in and drive off to the end
of the world, to the very rim

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of it, my hero. She
pulled the gems from her ears, hair

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and bosom and handed them to Peter, who received them with a bow.

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Next, she searched her pocket and
drew out a tiny key. Peter unlocked

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the case, and, having carefully
stowed the diamonds inside, locked it again.

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Handed back the key, touched his
hat, and walked off towards the

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dog cart. My dearest lady,
I began as soon as we were alone

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between the high walls. It's a
devotion of a life. Her bare arm

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crept into mind. There is a
little time left for us in which to

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be happy. Year after year,
I have marked off the almanac day by

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day, I have watched the dial. I saw my sisters married, and

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my sister's daughters, and still I
waited. Each had a man to love

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her and tend her. But none
had such a man as I would have

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chosen. There were none like you, my prince. No I dare say

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not. Oh, but my heart
is not so old. Take my hand,

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it is firm and strong. Touch
my lips they up burning. A

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low whistle sounded at the top of
the lane. As I took her hands,

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I pushed her back, and turning
ran for my life. I suppose

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that as I ran, I counted
forty before her scream came, and then

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the sound of her feet pelt,
and then the sound of her feet pattering

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after me. She must have run
like a demon, for I was less

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than ten yards ahead when pe To
caught my wrist and pulled me up on

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to the back seat of the dog
cart. And before George could set the

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horse going, her hand clutched at
the flap on which my feet rested.

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It missd its grasp, and she
never got near enough again. But for

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half a minute I looked into that
horrible face, following us and working with

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silent rage, And for half a
mile at least I heard the patter of

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her feet in the darkness behind.
Indeed, I can hear it now.

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End of I cheated Juliette by Que