This it's the two seventeen Recovery Podcast with Corey Winfield. Corey Winfield, Corey
Winfield, Corey, you have a rich person's name, like you should be
a billionaire with the name Winfield. Anyway, call me back, bro.
It is the sixth of June twenty twenty three. My name is Cory Winfield
and that this is the two seventeen Recovery Podcast in the North Studio and joining
me in the North Studio very special guest Norm. Norm. That's going man,
it's going great. Glad. Just thought about the studio today. We
got some voice work for you to do today which I'm looking forward to.
Yeah, yeah, I'm you know, I'm inspired and uh, you know,
just very grateful to be able to be in this position of my life
considering everywhere I've been. It's nice and it's awesome to sit back and flecked
on that sometimes you know, it's just like wow, like are you in
the spot where you want to be in the future now? But it's damn
sure better than places where you could be or have been, you know,
So it's just like pretty humbling, definitely definitely humbling. I you know,
when I when I look back at it. Uh, you know, and
I look where I'm at now, I could definitely say that I'd never picture
i'd be you'd be here. Um, you know that self pity, that
negative self talk always had me thinking that I I couldn't achieve nothing, and
what was the point? Yeah, you know, so it was. You
know, it's it's been a long road. Um, you know a lot
of downs, but you know that just makes me appreciate the ups, So
doesn't Mitchell joins us from the couch. Hello, Yeah, I was gonna
make you go out in the lobby. I was talking to Norm like,
hey, Norm, we're gonna do this, and I was like, we'll
get the other guys on. He's like cool. It's like no, but
I'm gonna make him broadcast from a different room. And he just looked at
me like why. I was like, because it's fun to confuse us with
the echo. Yeah, And he's like again like why because he and this
is why, because he refused to wear headphones because the echoes. But he
doesn't know that his MIC's not picking up when he doesn't barely talking to so
I have to get all up in it. Well, that's not gonna be
a drop or anything. We already have one drop by and now it's gonna
be getting up in it. How you doing today, Mitch, dude?
Good getting up in it? Now? How are you doing today? You
had a little little battle with um like antique bodies or something. I mean
you already told everybody what was going on if you listen to the podcast.
I did not. I did not say that. Um No, I'm doing
really good. Head a little bout with the VID and uh what you had?
You had? Yeah, damn crazy. Yeah it was only the third
time I've gotten it, m but for single time, it's gotten a little
easier and yeah a little better. So well, I'm glad that you caught
the one everybody I's already had because we ain't catch it again. Like we're
putting puzzles together or like we were playing patty Cake. We were all kinds
of silly stuff and I can't catch it like shared a popsicle. I'm up
in it. Yeah. See that's why I would play the job. That
day was great. I came back here just to like get some stuff to
clean my stuff. You're like, get out here, don't go back here.
What are you doing back here? Get out? What do you want
me to come back. Never I might have said that. I mean yeah,
And I was like, now you got health insurors like, yeah,
well there's nothing to do for COVID. But okay. I was like,
call your doctor and say you got COVID. They're like, don't come here,
we'll put it in We'll put it in your chart. Yeah, good
luck. Now this is of course the medical question. Nor you don't have
to answer it if you don't feel comfortable. But did you have COVID?
Have you caught it yet? Yeah? I actually had COVID when I was
in treatment. Damn they did um. I was in uh my treatment in
Potoski and uh there's about six of us that got it and they quarantined us
off for six days and gave us room service, brought us our meals,
and gave us TV all day. I say, well, this, I
guess is living right here. I wish I had a dog set while I
had COVID. Wow, you gave it. You can give pets COVID.
You know that your family just doesn't care. Yeah, that's tough, but
it's tough when your family doesn't care like that, you know, I don't
know how Mitchell Mitchell you our true testament man, all stuff you've been through,
and then just to you know, have that support that you have or
don't have. I have support. I give them a lot of crap.
I don't necessarily always have the support that I would like, but they do.
They are supportive. Hopefully they're listening and they can start giving you birthday
cards again. Or they could just be quiet when people in our house are
trying to sleep. Kidding anyway, it's stunk about it. Let's unpack this
arm or amongst friends, a long time, long time thing in the old
neighborhood of Mitchell m So people stuff. People don't let a man sleep,
not when he got COVID, not when you're working midnights, doesn't really matter.
Oh wow, now do you have Do you have pets? You have
kids or all? Yes? Both those are different. Yeah, that's the
thing is it's either the kid or somebody yelling at one of the pets.
Like the other day, I was sleeping because COVID. I wanted to rest
and heel as well as possible. That's what I told you. Yeah you
did. I listened, got into about an hour of early bedtime, and
I wake up to screaming happening in my house. And I've told you a
little bit of what's going on in my house or some situations where things could
get a little you know, you don't, you don't know, just some
with the relationships with some of the people that used to live there. So
I get up and I'm like, what's going on? What's wrong? Everybody's
like, what do you mean the yelling and screaming that was just happening that
woke me up out of my covid rest. Oh, I don't know,
man, I there's a guild of the Cat or something. Oh, thanks,
guys, appreciate it. So you're hearing things must have been I was
hallucinating. That's what the COVID did to me. You think maybe Satan was
come up for you? No? No, okay, good say made it.
I was watching something on exorcism and stuff like that. You don't want
to go down that road, bro. Oh yeah no, yeah, that's
a different podcast. I've been around some of that stuff, and you know
that's a that's not gonna happen to me. When you stopped using the WIGI
board to a lot of things get better. Never ever done that. It's
bad. Don't say that I just I thought in your application news, but
professional Wigi board player, now I got, I got, I got something
to ask. Maybe it's a little weird. Um when I go to a
new apartment complexes and stuff, I always got to check the mirror in the
bathroom see if it's hollow. I don't want Candy Man coming through. I
don't know if any of you guys. It might be a little older for
some, but yeah, yeah, I was there for Candy Man. They
remade it, but I didn't see it looked like garbage. Yeah, I
didn't see them. You know, they're remaking everything, and it's like,
you know, they just fill trash. You know, it's keep just keep
the original, the original. Do something new, that's that's cool. But
it's like a movie version of like what is that bloody Marry or something like
that. You've never seen candy Man. Oh well he's got a task.
It's got a task for the weekend. Yeah, but I don't know if
the original will hold up though, you know digital effects they have now,
I just I don't know what the c G I they have now. Yeah,
it's tough for like these younger generations people to watch like stuff that we
grew up on and it is you know, it's can I have a dinosaur
flying out of the screen or something, and otherwise it's just not good enough.
I'm still waiting for when that. You know, we get the home
TVs that like have the fans in them, so when it's windy, the
wind blows on us and you know it's it's raining, we get like mists
coming from the TVs. They do that a like universal. Yeah, go
to the rides and you go in there, there's like actual fire on the
ceiling. Yeah, there was a great White concert one time. It was
over in Connecticut. Yeah, I wouldn't want that because fire will to kill
you like quick, and actually you die from the smoke first, but if
you don't, then you burn to death and then you'd get the smoke and
then it was like a rainy part and it's like so it's like getting what
it was pretty cool what you said. It couldn't hear you because I'm sorry
now, So norm Um, let's talk up a little bit about what you
do here at the two seventeen Recovery Center, because you have been inspiring other
people. I don't even know if you notice it, but you started a
meeting. And what we kind of tend to do here at the two seventeen
Recovery Center is we want people to take advantage of multiple pathways. You know,
like it's not yeah, there's a meets any means, there's tons of
meetings around that you can go to, tons of them, But what about
the meetings that other people want to start? You know, it's like,
well I like this or I want to go with that, and then people
in the other meetings starting wrong wild and you're in narrator and we're not trying
to do any of that, and what other people think about this is really
none of our business. But to give somebody like you a chance. Hey,
we got a room, we got some chairs, we got some books
for you. Yeah. This uh, this, this meeting was definitely a
hybrid meeting. It is at your your normal meeting, and it is put
together differently and uh, you know, we really we support people come here
and just have open conversations about you know, it is about a book called
Search for Serenity. It's based off that book. Uh, we do we
do a reading, um and uh we normally talk about it and uh,
but it's very open so people can just come and share and you can talk.
You can you can cross talk with each other and just feel open to
uh, you know, to say where you're at and uh and what it
really means and UH. But you know, I wanted to do something that
was different, you know. UM, And uh, I am I have
a sponsor, I am in the program. UM, So I don't I
don't throw shade on anything else. I mean, this is all about recovery.
Whatever gets you there, you know, is most important. It doesn't
matter. UM. And I got a lot of crossovers and people that come
from from the program that come in here, and and thanks for that.
UM. I have gotten a lot of good feedback for the people that show
up. And so you know, it's humbling, UM to be able to
be here. We talked about it earlier. You know what I picture myself
at this state, you know, I mean doing these things. And I
remember my first time I went into a meeting and I'm I'm sitting in the
corner, I'm balled up and I'm like crying, you know, and you
know, I'm looking at all I was like sixteen, I'm looking at all
these old guys, like what am I doing here? You know? UM?
And Uh, I remember sharing and the guy told me, he said,
he looked over. He said, hey, shut the fuck up.
He said, take the cotton balls out of your ears and put them in
your mouth for a little bit, you know. And because I was,
I was trying to get off the porch and run with the big dogs,
you know what I mean. And you know I was still getting potty trained
in the back. So I you know, at that stage in my life,
I didn't know nothing about you know, looking at my surroundings, learning
from peers or learning from people who have been through the fires. You know,
I was at that ten feet tall bulletproof and uh I knew it all.
And yeah, obviously you know, of course I left that meeting.
Yeah, screw them guys. You know they don't know JA. And I
was I think using that night, you know what I mean. So but
that that is a definitely a part that I'll always remember of him saying to
me. And it kind of makes me reflective when I go to places,
really take in my environment and be willing to be open minded and willingness to
listen to people and suggestions that are given to me. Because the older I
get, the more I know, I don't know. Shit's well, well,
put, the first time you went to a meeting, Mitch, what
was that like? It was weird because about half of it was kind of
clicky everybody knew each other and they're like best buddies, and then the other
half we're kind of like the outsiders, which is weird because they kind of
sat on the outside too, And then half of them spoke and half of
them didn't, and it was kind of weird. End up going for like
nine or ten months or something like that, never made a lasting relationship with
anybody. Spoke every once in a while and people are like, Okay,
cool, thanks, and then it's like they didn't give a rat's ass.
I think a lot of people are afraid to go and do a sex addiction
meeting. Yeah, so I really are. I totally understand that connecting with
people. What about going straight out and your first like substance use addiction meeting,
what was that like? It was completely different? Yeah, let's talk
about that. You're just opening right up then, huh uh No, it
was exactly the same. Oh damn, Okay, well maybe yeah, Well
hopefully you're you're making strides and have you been to you did you go to
a meeting with Justin and Adam one time or did they just go on their
own? Yeah, I haven't been. They must have just went on their
own. I'm not part of the cool kid click here. So oh I
didn't know we had one. Oh it's there. I'll do something about that.
You're like, you're the leader, asshole. Fabulous shirt beef came from.
Yeah, yeah, we're gonna have shirt snorm and they're gonna one of
them is gonna say do you want to buy a shirt? Did I tell
you the latest? I think you might have been out with COVID because I
had a dream and Justin when we sent him out with the wireless at the
the u FAM rally, I was talking to this lady and she was like
getting deep into like I do this and I do this, and I do
it from a family. I'm like, man, like it was touching my
heart, you know, and all the other stuff I having him do with
stupid. But this lady was like really on something, and I was like,
man, Justin, you know how betterr family's proud and he's just in
the middle of nowhere, totally inappropriate, not the time to do it.
It says, Yeah, you want to buy a T shirt? And we
were all just like what the like justin like what that's not the time,
bro, Like what are you doing? Man? Like talk to her about
her store, like she's one that you would really want to talk to,
not the lady. I had him talking to him in the trash, you
know. But so I was like, dude, like wow, so it's
just like giving him crapp. He's like, we should have T shirt,
you know, want to buy it? I want to buy a shirt.
And then I thought, man, that would be great if we just had
a shirt that said want to buy a shirt two seventeen recovery in the arm,
and then on the back or on the arm or somewhere a QR code
where people could scan that would send them to buy that shirt. So when
they bought the shirt, they're really doing promotion for us because other people could
buy that same shirt and kind of pay it forward. Isn't that awesome?
I'm gonna I'm gonna go ahead and put on I want a shirt idea.
I want I want one of those up old eighties cut you know, they're
breathable ones, the mesh on mesh ones. But I wanted to say breedable
material. Okay, two seventeen breedable material. I think that's that's the search
for serenity. I think two seventeen stops at the door there on that one.
But we didn't. We did have one that said, uh to seventeen
recovery podcasts may cause sexual relationships. Yeah, and they got in some trouble
with that one. I'll tell you about it. I finally got to listen.
I thought I had listened to all the u FAM podcasts and I hadn't.
And I realized the one that I hadn't listened to, and I think
I think I thought I had listened to it because I was there for it,
um, but was the one Danielle was in Ah and holy crap man
she was. She was better at what she did than justin entire her own
put together. And I was just dying. I was like, I definitely
missed this, and yeah it was. It was so good. Yeah,
she was hilarious. Yeah. We were at the rally and this woman comes
up. No, I mean she's a woman, but young woman because when
she's like, Hey, what do I need? I'm gonna be on the
podcast what I do? And I was like, well, you gotta buy
a shirt, saying okay, whatever. So she buys a shirt and coming
like okay, I bought a shirt and I was like, well, hold
on, I gotta wait for it to check to clear, you know,
like we gotta wait shirt. But I was just struggle with her. But
gave her the wireless mic and the headset and she went out and started messing
with people, and I was like, say this to this guy, and
I didn't have to. She started glow up to him. And this guy
was wearing his Tiger shirt. She's like, oh, you know Tiger's fan.
He's like yeah. She's like, who's your favorite player? He couldn't
name one, and she's like, yeah, well next time, no,
at least know one player on the team before you start wearing people stuff,
you know. And she was there's this like she started giving them hell yeah,
that was amazing. She was asking me like will he punched me in
the face if I cut him in line? Or will she? And you're
supposed to know this so before I cut her, like I want to know
what answer? It was so good. Yeah, having fun and recovery is
what we're about, nor kind of on something that you have to do.
She from nowhere was the best one. You know, they say, you
know you find fun, you know, if you're not, if you're in
recovery, you're out there and you're like, ah, you know, I'm
you're down, you're out. You're just not finding it. You're not searching.
You're not searching for the fun. And that that starts with you.
Fun is not going to knock on your door say hey, I'm fun,
come on, came to get you, you know what I mean, you
get just like anything else. Well, sometimes I'm not paying an extra for
you. That stops at two ones, but you know, you kind of
go. I was thinking about going back to those guys that were that were
in the meeting um when I first meeting, and one became my sponsor later
on. And you know, one thing he had taught me was that,
uh, you know, he was trying to give me advice, and advice
is something that somebody has went through that fire before you. They came out
the other side and they can give you advice. Someone's opinion is my dad
telling me a non addict, you know, do this and do that.
You know you'll be fixed. You're cure, you know, And that's he
hasn't been through the fire of addiction, and you know, I love him
and everything, but that's his opinion on what I should do. And those
people who have who have been through it, you know, whether it's a
you know, going through a divorce and you know somebody of co workers just
went through a divorce, you know, they're giving you advice. Somebody who's
never been through that experience, they can give you their opinion at night.
And I try to remember that even when I'm talking to my daughters and they're
calling me and they're asking me. You know, first of all, I
got to ask the question, do you want feedback or do you I'm just
here to listen. I'll just listen because I've learned not to but not to
say anything. I gotta first asked the question. Um, you know,
I got no problem if you're just venting and I'll just sit here and listen.
But uh um. But if they do kind of ask for some feedback,
I have to, Um, you know, I have to determine and
I let them know, you know, this is my opinion about this is
and this is my advice, and we've talked, so they know what the
difference is between that. Um. For so long I would take other people's
opinions and think, Okay, that's what I need to do. But they've
actually had no experience going through it, and so it was, you know,
basically a hail Mary. Yeah, having people there with you that have
been through it. And I was told to never give advice to people,
you know, because if they asked for it, you know, I'm sure.
But otherwise, you know, like you said with your daughters and stuff,
is you shut up and listen, like okay, okay, and you
know a better way to approach it is have you thought about doing this or
have you thought about doing that? I just founded Canadian right there? Do
you hear that I send a boot? It's been an in a boot,
dude, But it's it's a it's about you know, and I just want
to keep saying about because I'm gonna make sure I'm Canadian. I have fried
chicken today so that should take that off. But no, if you thought
about doing this or you know, for me, this is what I would
do, you know, like, or for me, this is what I
did, and I don't tell people this is what I would do. I
say, this is what I did. This is what didn't work for me,
But you can do whatever you want for you, you know, it's
it's a different game plan for other people. But when you were talking about
your meeting though, I want to go back to this real quick, your
meeting that you have here at the two seventeen Recovery Center, which, of
course, if somebody has a two seventeen recovery app tuesdays noon, jump on
there, check out Norm and his group and see what it's about. But
one thing about your group, though, and it doesn't matter. It doesn't
matter if it's a it's NA it's breastfeeding group. I don't know why that
came to my mind, but whatever group it is, I'm sure it's out
there. Is based on you're saying earlier about the fun people and having fun,
people who have fun, and people have like a good chemistry, Like
you could have a meeting about baking muffins, and I think those same people
would show up just because they're like, man, this dude's in recovery.
We're having fun, Like we're all relatable. Nobody's here vs. And there's
no like special like reason to come here, like hey you get extra brownie
point, Like it's to be around people that are doing good things and that
have good aura and just that are having fun, you know. And I
think that says a lot about your meeting in you where you are in your
recovery. I remember when I first met you, you know, I'm like,
Okay, this dude, you know, you could go this way or
that way. It's kind of like I got the I got the Corey Chaufeur
a ride. Yeah, yeah he did, and I was like, Okay.
I was like, I think that dude's gonna do all right. But
sometimes you think that, you know, you never know. And sometimes I
think, oh, man, that that dude's gonna go down and fire and
see people later and they're like killing it, and I'm like, man,
that's good. Well I've noticed, I've not I've noticed and learned over time
is nothing's done in absolutes. Yeah, um, and that uh you know.
They used they used to tell me, you'd see somebody is really just
doing overachieving maybe um really just really involved, and they you know, and
they'd be like that that guy is the type that that will fail. I
don't know why they would say that, but it's it's almost it's it's not
a job and you can't you have to be well rounded. You can't just
do only recovery and like your whole life is based on this thing. Nothing,
nothing, you know what I mean. I'm a I'm a believer in
a higher power and that's for each individual. So I'm you know, I
believe, you know, you believe, you believe in that higher power.
You let that one take you know, have control of your life. Um,
and you have to. But I think you you know, everything can
be over indulged. And Bill w wrote that in his book as well,
you know what I mean. In the AA book and his writings, you
know, he talked about how you know you can over indulge into the program.
Um. So you know that you know is there's people that are on
the on the board or you know, the finance a part of it and
everything else you know, um, and they get burnt out and so you
know, and I think that's the inventory we need to take of ourselves and
you know, make sure that we are we are getting We're filling the cups
on every aspect of our lives, you know what I mean, not just
in one aspect. So you're gonna say something much we said a lot of
really good things in there. I had some things to add, but I
think you kind of cover them all. I think you'd be like, yeah,
but you gotta You're like, well, no. I mean one thing
that I I kind of agree with, and I believe I haven't been able
to read all of the Search for Serenity, but the parts that I have
one I've really liked too. I think it kind of covers this. But
you kind of mentioned that recovery shouldn't be I don't think it's meant to be
your way of life for the rest of your life. It's a step and
now that I'm gonna go with a certain number of steps here, but there's
more going on after that, Like you get into recovery and your higher power
has more of a life for you. And I think the book that I
read, um it says something about, you know, living life more abundantly.
That's what higher Power wants for us. He does this when I don't
have the headphones on papulous. I mean, I I can, I can
agree, I can, I can agree to that. Um. I just
uh, you know, I think we should. But especially in the beginning,
I've found that I have to, um so put my life, you
know, around recovery. You're not recovery around my life. So I've you
know, if I'm not gonna do things just because it's convenient for me,
you know, I really want to do this, and I really want to
do that, that you know, in the long run is it's not going
to get me where I want to go. And each individual knows their path
where they want to go. You know, one thing we've been working on
right now in search for serenity is being decisive in your decision making. Don't
flounder around, you know with you know, this decision, maybe this decision,
you know, make you know, go over the pros and cons of
decision that you want to make, whatever the struggle is, whatever the obstacle
is in your life, you know, come to that concrete decision, this
is what direction I'm going to go, and you put all your resources,
all your efforts into accomplishing that goal. There's gonna be other things that might
pop up and said, try to sway you maybe the other way. You
got to put those blinders on, like you're a horse, you know,
and you're gonna go just in that direction where you made that decision to go.
And so I've made the decision that I am. You know, I
am fully invested in my recovery and uh so that's that's just where I want
to be. It's also not a checklist. I also learned this with uh,
with my kids. You know, I thought being a good dad was
you know, I get them during the weekend check. I I bought them
to Christmas gifts check. Um. You know, I got them their clothes
for school. Check. And it's not a it's not a grocery list raising
kids, it's not a grocery list in recovery. You know, it's so
much more involved than that. Um. And so you know, my kids
emotionally needed me more than I was there for them. But I did this
checklist, I had crossed off these boxes and was like, wow, I'm
a good dad. I'm good And uh I wasn't. I was not a
good dad at all. Um. And I was selfish. Um. And
so you know, but again, nobody comes out of the wound. They're
just they got all this information the soul aspect of life. UM. You
know it's something that you know I've I've learned through classes. You know,
some forest, some forest, um. But uh, but classes I've took
that uh you know, I looked at it was like, you know,
I had a woman um in one of my classes. I was actually in
prison, um, and she said, oh, norm Um, would you
choose yourself for your daughters? I said, what what do you mean?
She was like, if you could hand your daughter off to anybody, would
you choose yourself to hand your daughter off to? Fuck? No? No,
And it hit me. Yeah, I was one of those moments where
I had that epiphany, was like I have to make changes. I have
to become that person that I would want to hand my daughter off to,
because if not one am I over one? Am I complaining about or talking
to them about decisions they're making in their lives and I'm over here just running
amuck on my own. Remember you tell me about that when I did pick
you up and you're like, hey, you know here I was doing the
you know, weekend stuff, drop them off and then off to you know,
destruction, and I think you were you talking about how that that wasn't
right and you were gonna not do that anymore. So I was like,
that's good stuff right there. Man. To realize it and to know like,
no, no, it's not a it's not a checklist. It's it's
about being there all the time and just being ready all the time. You
never know when that phone's gonna ring and they're gonna be like Dad, I
mean, yeah, you're exactly right. It's not about the checklist and it's
not you know, it's about being ready because and um, being flexible.
You know again, UM, I've learned through failure. That's the only way
we grow is by failing. So you know I've failed. Um earlier,
I stumbled and uh what you know when they call, I know now kind
of uh, you know, where does my place in this relationship at this
moment? You know again, I might hear just to lead, you know,
listen, UM. You know, I also learned that I have to
let them make their own mistakes. You know, I can, I can
be a wealthy information do the readings, do this, UM, tell them
about whatever it is. You know, my opinion is about this or that.
But unless they ask me, I can give them. But let them
fail because that's the only way they learn. I learned through failure. They
have to go, they have to stumble, just like when they were kids
and they were walking. You know if every time, you know, my
daughter was walking and she fell and started crying, and I went and picked
her up. That's what she'd do. I'd carry it a whole time.
She would know if she look around. But once she stumbles and false start
crying, no one comes running to her. She starts looking around like okay,
all right, well I'm gonna get up and start walking again. I'm
gonna learn, you know, my my, you know, my body's gonna
straighten up. She's gonna start walking more erect and walking better with confidence.
But if I sit there and pick her up and baby or the whole time,
she's not gonna she's not gonna to learn, you know, become that
strong independent woman. She's always going to want somebody to sit there and take
care of her. And sometimes you might not be right, you know.
So like I've been given bad advice before, you know, by loved ones,
and it's like it's not because they want to give me bad advice,
it just that's what they thought to give. And you know, so it's
not even about that when you look deeper, because there could be resentments when
you're like, hey, no, do it like this or do it like
that? You started throwing out stuff they don't even want to hear. They
didn't ask you for the advice, you know, and you start they call
a helicopter pairent or whatever, and you start trying to help them with every
single decision. You don't got time for that man, And like you said,
you know, to let them learn on their own. I think he
touched on a great subject there is because what might have worked for you is
not going to work for them, right and so you know, my my
advice or my experience might be what you know in that certain situation might be
like you know, this worked for me, just doesn't work for them.
So a lot of you know, they have to go through the fire for
themselves, and I'm out that other end. Yeah, I definitely believe in
that. It was like back in the day, norm we were outside playing
people like Mitch, they were inside gaming, you know, like we know
what a kickball is? Kickball? Is that a ball that you trip over?
Because kid left out? We were playing flashlight. Yeah you didn't see
candy Man, So you're you're younger than did you? Did you at least
see children of the car? That was see that was after my Okay,
he's crossed off the list. Okay, I was gonna go down the whole
list of like movies. But Wayne's World. Yes, Austin Powers. I
didn't really like her. Oh my gosh, you didn't like Austin Powers.
I was really, really, really sheltered as a young child. So it
was Transformers around when you were a kid. Like the cartoons. Yeah,
they had bus on USA Today cartoons, Yeah, they like on Saturday mornings.
Yes, hemen a man. There are reruns. But yeah, watch
you Man, that new one that they had come out. I tried to
watch a couple episodes of that on Netflix. I think it is No,
I don't know about that Netflix. Let's talk about Netflix sucking real quick.
Do you have Netflix? You don't waste your money that way? I believe
they. I believe they have it at the house. That what a cracker
shit they keep putting out these damn movies. Maybe one of them are American,
rest of them are that other stuff. Hobla, he blow, and
they don't even and then when they try to double in English, not even
close. I matched Mitch's video that I just made over the weekend up better
than what those professionals do in Hollywood or wherever they are. That's gonna be
on the website, right, I don't know. You want me to put
it on there? I will. I think it's horrible. Got to do
anyway? Netflix, I know what you're talking. Yeah, the first time
I saw that, I was like, what is this nonsense? Now it's
kind of entertaining for me, but like, damn, near four out of
every five movies you're like, oh this looks cool. No, not even
in English, and the dub is so bad Bruce Lee movie, Like they
don't have it, like they don't have like a guy. Let's just say,
like like Mitch and I right now we're looking at til, they're laughing,
we're smiling, and we're talking. They'll have it dubbed in like this.
What's up with Netflix? Well, I don't know what it's going to
want with Netflix? Well did you like Netflix? Well, it's because it's
and they're like European countries, so it's it's like Norwegian or German and all
these other ones. But they want to have it in English and other languages.
So all they do is dubb a different language over. I didn't even
get good voice actors. They just get like just it's horrible. Man,
the blonde dude, let's go find a blond dude. I say, we
boycott Netflix. I am close. There's not much out there. Like every
time they charge hits my stuff, I'm like, oh, I didn't cancel
it yet. I stopped watching that. Uh, I don't want to get
to it's ray show. They did a movie Cutie Pies or something. Oh
yeah, um that was like the little they were sexualizing young agent. Yes,
and I didn't well, of course I didn't watch it. When they
were promoting that, I was like, yeah, it just didn't fit my
morals. And uh, you know, those are the convictions that I have
today that uh um, I tend to try to stand on my morals.
Um, and the things that I do. You know, um, what's
they talk about lip service? But it's uh, you know it's and that's
the difference I think, you know, with understanding and knowing as like you
know, okay, I can say you know, I know this or I
know that because I've heard it, you know what, do I truly understand
it? And that goes with my morals, you know, I say,
oh, yeah, I got these morals because everybody said you got these morals?
You know, you should you should be like that. That's what SOCIH
he wants you gotta have these morals when I you know, through the search
for serenity is what we're doing is really trying to find out who we are
and what our morals are. Um, do I understand them? And uh,
understanding means that you live that way. Um, you make them calls,
you say, you know what, this isn't going with what I believe
in. So I yeah, I don't know if it's a boycott or whatever.
It's just I choose not to continue. You know, I'm not going
to give them my money. But H So you know, those are just
certain things that that you know, people are finding, um and learning about
themselves in the meeting and and uh to watch, like I said, to
watch people light up when a certain reading or something touches them and be able
to open up and talk about it, you know, not even not have
to wait to be called on or it's their turn, but kind of they
can just come out and start. Man, this right here really touched me
and we can sit there and talk about it. You know, Like I
said, it's very high bred type um loose you know, UM meeting Uh
you know, um, and I'm gonna you know, I gotta thank two
months having recovery over here for UM given the opportunity to put that together.
Um. You know, Marnie asked me, UM, and I was you
know, it just happened at the right time she asked me, and I
was thinking, I just having to be thinking, Man, I really wish
there was this this this type of meeting UM based off that book. Yeah,
we kind of had you know, the houses and trim sent around here
in mind because there's some recovery housing in the neighborhood and we thought, man,
like some of the people that are new to recovery or just early on
in recovery, sometimes they might want to explore different ways. You know.
It's there's so many different ways, you know, people can can get their
recovery on and to grow in their recovery, and why not give them a
place to do it at you know. So we went around you know,
some of the houses and we're like, hey, here's the chance, and
you know a few of you guys were like hell, yeah, like let's
do that, and other people were just like new And that's that's the difference,
you know, between and not saying that everybody who comes here is gonna
make it. I'm not saying that at all. I'm just saying that people
that are living their recovery, they're taking the control of their recovery into their
own hands and doing things that they want to do to better themselves and their
recovery with other people that are like minded. I think that's just great,
you know. So I'm I'm proud of you for stopping up to do it.
And one of the things that probably keeps people from doing it is what's
they're back going thinking about me? You know, if I start that meeting,
they're gonna be hating not me. Yeah. That that that fear factor.
I mean, that is a man, it's it's a it's a killer
in so many people's life. It's it's that when did we as as beings
and when we didn't have when we were a kid. When we were a
kid, you know, we could walk around. I remember I was I
was playing hockey and I got on I said, my neighbor played hockey.
So I told my parents, say, I want to play hockey, Daddy,
Sorry, sign you up. I got on that ice first time skating.
I'm doing three hundred and sixty degree twirls and falling on my ass,
and my parents are up there and they're just like, god, he sucks,
you know. And I come off the ice and I'm like, god,
I did a great job, didn't I'm like, yeah, he did
a great job. He's horrible, and U yeah. But I kept doing
it. I kept playing. I kept practicing, you know, before you
know it, I mean, I was playing triple A. I went to
Finland, I went to Sweden, you know, all over the place playing
hockey. But if you know, I didn't have that influence where somebody said
I sucked. You know, i'd quit. But at a certain point,
when we get older, we get in society, we get in these schools,
we give our sovereignty over to other people's opinions about us. My daughter
did, and she was a good singer. She sung in choir and they'd
give her her own, you know, spot solo. And a couple of
girls told her she sucked this thing. And she came home crying, and
she quit choir. And you know, again I was given my opinion and
say, honey, I don't think you should do that. I think you're
good. I don't, you know, but she quit um and and it's
just to me, it's like when did we bite the fruit or bite the
apple? And we're like, we're naked all of a sudden, we got
to cover up, and that stops us, you know, from reaching our
potential, you know, because we're again failure is part of growing and so
we have to go out there. We're not going to be great, We're
not gonna be perfect. We're not going to be the best in the world,
you know what I mean, but we can achieve our goals. You
know, if our goals is to get better, well then we can get
better, you know what I mean. And you know, the being good
at something is in the eyes of those you know yourself, as long as
you're making yourself happy. Like I'm a horrible danswer I am. I am
just gonna say it. I would, but I was like, you know
what, next time there's a wedding, I want to break loose because I
know it's uncomfortable. And one thing about you know, this recovery is getting
comfortable being uncomfortable, right, and we got to put ourselves in positions of
being uncomfortable to get comfortable in it. You know, it's not just going
to get to happen. There's these breathing exercises you can do in the shortness
of breath. And what that is is is, once you get intense situations,
you'll notice that you're breathing, you know, chokes off. And so
if you can practice getting in that position when something is overwhelming, something's very
stressful, something chaotic has happened, you can get into that situation and all
of a sudden you're comfortable being in that short of It's like, Okay,
I can deal with this and it's not so overwhelming. Yeah. That's one
guy that I know. He was saying that he didn't like go into any
kind of meeting because it made him uncomfortable. I was like, well,
then that's exactly what you need to do, homie. You know, well,
I just don't like them. It made me uncomfortable, that's all I
kept saying. I was like, well, you got to figure that out,
because what you like and what you want, what you need, they're
different things. You know, I'm not doing so good today, and then
you can doing for him. You know you're gonna say something, Mitch,
you're talking about breathing exercises. Oh, so you're breathing it's real tough,
bad. So yeah, I just wanted to kind of throw it out there
too, because there are some people that probably weren't like wanted to or maybe,
oh, maybe I'll do this kind of meeting, but then they just
kind of turned it down because you know that they're gonna make fun of me
and thinking, well, what are you doing? You know, and and
the houses and when you're living and so we're living. Um, we had
like a ton of people Hello, hey, dish Rashanda, what you're doing?
Sorry? That was Norm's phone. Um. When the house, the
dynamics change all the time, and it could be good, it could be
bad, but you still gotta go through and stick with the people that you
know are on the real stuff doing the same things you want to be doing.
It's easy for people just to follow the leader, and the leaders not
really a leader, or least he's not leading them anywhere well, and it's
just like okay, and I've seen those those houses go down. I've seen
those those things happen, and I've seen gray houses, you know, and
sober living. I was in a house that was all over the place when
I was in sober living last time, and then I managed a sober living
house that was pretty good until I left that run back me up on that.
I mean, I think it's a slippery slope. You know, if
you can get a good, good bunch of group of guys in there and
people support each other, um, you'll know the ones that are real and
the ones that are fake, you know what I mean, And and that
you know, every that's okay because everybody's in their own position, their own
life. Some people are just not ready. You know. I had plenty
of times where I was put into situations by the court system. They wanted
me to do this, and I had to, you know, jump through
their hoops and do what they're saying. But in my back of my mind,
I had, um, you know, reservations. You know, I
knew when I was getting on probation, I was gonna go hit the pen.
I was gonna go do this, you know what I mean. And
so you know I wasn't I wasn't ready there. Um. I just you
know, I think again that conviction inside us the whole people accountable. You
know, it's very important for the brotherhood because once you start, you know,
well, you know, my wife wants to come over on a sneaker
in the window. She stays and night Okay, that's fine. The rest
of the house kind of knows. Now this guy's like, hey, man,
I got my buddy. I mean he I weren't you know, I
want him. You know, he got no place to go. And for
you know it, it's turning into a flat house. People ain't doing their
charges. It's starting to look like a trap house. And it's a mind
set. You know, you get that mindset you go into a place and
that and for that new guy who's coming out of the treatment program and he's
coming into the house and the house is all a mess and it looks like
a trap house. You know, that mindset is there. It's like you
want it to be clean. You want to come in and have this kind
of safe environment. And it's not just for you, you know. I
know, yeah, you're cutting this corner. And that's fine because you know,
again we get in this title. Man, well, you know,
I've been sober for four months. I deserve you know, I deserve this,
and I'm paying this much so I deserve this and that ego and that.
But that new guy that's coming in there, you know, it's that's
where we you know, we got to think about the other people. He
might be coming in here and you're cutting corners. You know he's he's on
the fence. He starts cutting the corners and for you know it, you
know he's dropping dirty and he's kicked out. And so I it's not just
about you know you yeah, it's some of the rules. You might look
at and say, you know, I don't know about that, um,
but there's a purpose. I mean, these these places have been in business
for a very long time. They have you know, they have a lot
of tools and things that have been used. They know what works and what
doesn't work, and so, um, you know, be flexible again,
be comfortable being uncomfortable. You know you can't do this. You can't do
that right now. And once you once your time is up, or you
find a place and you can move on your own, then you can do
what you want and you know what you earned it. Um. You know,
Mitch over here, when he gets that nice, beautiful eight hours a
straight sleep, no waking up, no interruptions, See, he can sit
there and be like god man, that was a great, wonderful eight hours
to sleep and be very appreciative for those people that were there, and you
know, get up and say hey, I just want to thank you guys
for not making no noise, not um and being mindful that you know,
Daddy has to sleep and they'll say, here's some earplugs. Dad. The
best part is it's not the children of the issue. Oh he's got options
though, We got options. And that's that's one thing. People have options,
and there's always something else, so you could do. There's always something
else, you know. I mean you could take it to farm, use
a pillow and put them to sleep, you know what I'm saying. Well,
we watched that Steve Harley Harvey inspirational video the day. You know when
that dog barks, damn it, a dog's barking, waking me up,
or at least I got a dog. I love that dog feud. I
don't tell anybody that's why. That's why they closed the door. A feud.
But well, we'll wrap it up though. UM. I appreciate you
spending an hour just about damn near hour talking with us on the podcast.
It was fun and I appreciate you guys, thanks for asking me to sit
down with you and it's uh, yeah, I really appreciate it. And
then we're gonna make your promo for your video too, so that'll be fun.
And then you have an idea for like a wacky promo, which we'll
do down down the road. But but well, we'll put something out there
to kind of promote your meeting. And I think it'll be fun and I
think it'll be good. And yeah, people can always join, Like our
place isn't the biggest, Like we don't have hundreds of seats in here,
but you can always join on zoom. No, but having overflow, having
too, it's always like you it's always a good problem to have. And
if if it does get to a point where there is uh, you know,
it is kind of overwhelming with a lot of people. You know,
the venue could always change. It could always get to a begger venue.
I'm sure. Um backs back to back, yeah, back to backs.
But uh, you know, the recovery community here in Traverse City is a
great community. This is one of the finest communities for recovery to be in.
And so um there's always a helping hand out out there or somebody willing
to open up opportunities for those who really want it. Cool. I appreciate
you coming by again on a Tuesday, because you're here in your meeting so
and Mitch, thanks for letting me play the role of bad host, asking
you silly questions, putting you on the spot, uncomfortable situations, asking you
do you're gonna say something? When I knew you weren't, like, hey,
you were going to comment on that? Right? What's the time?
I was, Oh, I would forget that, you would put me onside?
And the really, wait, what was I gonna say? I mean,
you can, you can thank me, but you're opaying me for a
couple more hours. So can you say, hey, Mitch, sit down
and do this? I say, okay, yeah, and uh, you
can go back and listen to the drops I play. They weren't that bad.
Then you guys give me a couple of good looks there for a minute.
But I will plug in though. Yes um at two Months seven two
Months seven Recovery Tuesdays noon to one as the search for Serenity mean Killing It.
Check it out to seventeen recovery dot com for more info and like I
said, it's also available on Thanks for listening to the two seventeen Recovery podcast.
We hope you come back for our next episode.