We're alive, We're on the air, We're live. I'm gonna tell you,
Mike, I like I take away. I love this job. Yeah,
but what I don't love about the morning shift is when it's cold.
Uh huh. Yeah, this is a null sort of a first I guess
for for me, I did the run outside and start start the heap up.
Then I got to think, and someone's just gonna steal it, which
I guess everyone thinks when they do that, right. Yeah, when I
live in a probably wilder neighborhood maybe than some, and no one's away come
to my neighborhood because that's the bossoms, the opossums. I have a lot
of wildlife. We all do. Coyotes, opossums, coyotes. Dreamed there
were some mountain lions there, weren't you dreamt that? I dreamt that.
I also, oh, crab, what's it called when we're when we dreamed
about a coworker a nocturnal admission? What if it's not the most vivid,
but it's vivid enough. Yeah, we'll take it. Let you go.
About three nights ago, I dream that Danny was caught on a live stream
naked with a woman who is famous she was like an influencer type. He
wasn't wearing a Josh giddy jert but they were hanging outside. Was the weird
part about it is they were She was like laid out on a table outside
of a hot tub, like he might have just given her a massage.
Yeah. There was snow behind them, so it was almost like they were
on some trip. Keep in mind, this is not Danny now. It
appeared to be Danny from ten years ago, a little younger, a little
more baby face, but she still has a little bit of it, you
know. And it was funny because you know, he's a skinny guy,
a little bit of a tiny, tiny pooch, and I know im the
last person you could talk about pooches. What sticks out to me is she's
live streaming, she's got the phone and she's laying on her back. She's
naked, yeah, and it's like as if she had just turned her over
from her massage. He's naked, but he's tucked tucked full talk yeah,
and he's not dude. There's no penetrave force. But he's standing as he
like ruffling around the table. He had maintaining the tuck and he was autographing
right above her glory land. Really yeah, all I remember? That's all
you remember? Yeah, sort of a hot tub scene somewhere in the snowy
mountain towns. But I also remember like the comments being like like eighteen thousand
people viewing at once, like because she was an influencer of some sort,
okay, not because of his fame. Yeah, and he autographed her pubis.
Yes, man, I love it. I can't believe this because this
came back to life yesterday as I was thinking about it, that I was
driving to my car and I'm there. I don't think we should take that
to the air. And I got here and it was like, the rules
are rules? Yeah? No, no, no, that that's the locked
in dream about a coworker. You talk about it. He's not here to
hear this himself. Uh No, I don't think he's up. Texas,
Texas. Didn't you? If you're up, you better not be you.
What are you doing? A dream? It wasn't. I guess it involves
a coworker, but not the dream itself. I was in bed with a
coworker of ours in the same bed is Christina, and that seems very normally
happen. We lie together insin and we're in Florida, and this is,
you know, the meme of like the girl looking at the dude. Yeah,
she's thinking, oh my god, he's thinking about girls on the sidewalk.
No, that was a different one. Okay, not the one with
the guys. No, No, that's the looking back I'm saying. They're
lying together in bed and she's like looking at him and she's thinking, oh
my god, he's thinking about some other girl. And they show his thought
bubble and he's thinking about fancy foot James Cook not getting in the end zone
for the bills or whatever. So I was just staring at the ceiling when
we woke up, and she's like, you look pretty intense, intense.
What are you thinking about? You know? And only because it was so
clear what I was thinking of, I could tell her verbatim. And I
said, I'm thinking how hard it would be to throw a football into an
open dumpster from thirty five yards and if you could do it three times in
a row? Yeah? Did she engage? And I think I said fifty
yards the first time, but I've lowered it to thirty five. She's like,
oh, she laughs, She's like, that's really stupid. But like
probably relieved, But I was thinking of it. You know, like at
golf tournaments you have like a hole in one and it's like ten thousand dollars,
fifty thousand dollars whatever, like whatever the insurance thing is, Like what
the insurance applications would be to having a little stunt where if you could throw
a football into a dumpster from forty yards, say three times in a row,
like if someone would ensure it for ten thousand dollars, if that's a
hard enough equation. You know, it's we think that we can do a
lot of things. Yeah, we can do none of those things. Yeah,
Like I'll just watch any throw that's made him like, okay, we
couldn't do that. Well, it was fifty yards when I first thought it,
and I asked cash the next day. I'm like, you think that'd
be a fair bet? You know you can't do it years, right,
Yeah, he's like he said, I was at the Cowboys. He said
he was at the Cowboys facility a year ago, and he was pretty good
quarterback and he tried to just see how far I could throw it, and
he said he gave it everything, and I think he barely made it.
Fifty yards on one throw? Yeah? Do you In my head, I
think I could. I can huck at fifty yards, but I probably arm
would hurt the next day. I think. Do you in cash over Thanksgiving
break? Do you guys go out and hug the football around? Do we
share a catch? Uh? We did not, we have, but yeah,
me and my brother did, and we tend to every once in a
while. You did this, yeah, yeah, just just nothing more than
ten yards apart or fifteen yards of partners. Dude, After five minutes of
that, your arm hurts and your hands hurt from catching the football. Day's
up. Fun Your hands hurt from catching the stingy football. It stings.
It's football for a reason. See, there was such a tight spiral.
I don't know we used to do. Uh, you know, like before
I used to go back when the Packers been the playoffs all the time.
I used to go home and watch with my brother and my dad. It's
a two hour drive, it's not a deal. Wake up early on Sunday
morning or go spend the weekend out there. And before the game, me
and my brother liked to run a route tree, you know, just kind
of get the juices going because you've been drinking a little bit, and then
she's some nice cleaning or out. Yeah, before we start really snacking.
Let's go ahead and some calories off, so you hit. Now, we
do them different than what the pros do. We hit the wooing. Yeah,
I mean, well, we go off the high school playbook, which
is not ideal. But you go the one just right up the field.
Go route, Yeah, go right to get started. Two slant, nice
slant, okay. Three we're gonna revel bubble route. Okay, I'll motion
in. Is the slant in the bubble the same, both inside or the
slants outside the bubble. I'll motion in. Three guys are running back and
kind of just do the loop. You know the loop forged the curl,
you know orld in that the five is five and out. Six is the
post, seven is the corner flag. The eight is fifteen back to twelve
inside, and the nine is eighteen back to sixteen outside. Okay, get
both feet in. Nice dig and if you miss it, you got to
start over. So you gotta nine for nine or you're screwed. Yeah,
never got through it once. No, you get so tired, you're breathing
hard. Just the go route alone. Oh, we're never going to get
it done. The games about to start. Oh I missed that. I
used to like Turkey bowls back in the day, and salute anyone who went
out there and played in some form of a Turkey Bowl this year. We
used to have when I was in school, we'd play the throw the records
out the window, Kevin. When the Flagstaff Arizona Outback Steakhouse plays against the
Prescott Arizona Outback Steakhouse. Oh my god, dude, war to blow war
touch touch, hard touch, hard touch. Yeah. But we played it
in the JW Walk up sky Dome and Flagstaff that's the big dome and the
NAU plays. Oh that's a real thing. Yeah, the world's largest wooden
dome. I believe that's not some piecemeal game. No, it's legit.
And we annihilated them, mainly because see, I was Q for a couple
of years and we killed him no matter what. And then one year a
new dude showed up trying to take my job at the flag Staff out Back,
and he's really cool dude, we were friends. We went out to
the practice. I'm like, damn that he's got a really good arm.
I'm maybe losing my gig. Here. Turns out his name was Brendan Fitzpatrick
and he was Ryan Fitzpatrick's twin brother. Yeah, so he had the genetics.
Yeah yeah. I don't know if his twin brother or he he was
a twin and they were they were Ryan, I mean, anyways, Brett
brothers with Ryan. He had to play college football somewhere. A lot of
his brothers do. He has an Olympic swimmer brother, and I think that
was Brendan's twin. I don't know how many brothers are there, five the
Fitzpatrick bros. Gilbert Arizona's where they're from. There you go according to science,
and Ryan went to Harvard. Obviously one of them was a swimmer at
Notre Dame and it may have been Brendan, the guy I went to.
God, I gotta get all the way down too. Personal life, jeez,
Yeah, they have seven kids. Stop we have too many. It
doesn't say anthing, brother, That's that's what it was. So we did
the because we had still won when I was cute. We didn't want to
they didn't want to fire me. So we did the split quarterback backfield,
one center, two quarterbacks, snap it to whoever you want. Yeah,
it's going to just go back and forth. It's gonna go to the It's
very unpredictable for the defense because it's either going to go to the better quarterback
or the other one, yeah, or me. But yeah, that's so.
I saw Ryan Fitzpatrick at the Super Bowl a few years ago in Miami,
and I went. He's a friendly dude, and he does the media
even when he's still playing. He would do the media stuff. And I
talked to him about Brendan and he gave Brendan my email, So, I
mean, you know, it's all so that I that's him again. He
knows me as the guy who's he was friends with his brother, Brendan,
who took his job. But yeah, anyway, turkey balls were fun back
then. They were. We did one at un T and I really killed
a guy. Yeah, and it's their fault leading with the helmet. It
was, you know, I think I think I recruited machines for this one,
and the machine did go. Machines was a hoss right there. And
it was the U n T Radio Department against the journalism department, or it
was our TV f first journalism. Oh, but so they the first play
happens. So when no one makes it clear before the game, are we
doing two below? Are we doing touch? What's the plan in here?
You know? But it had been hyped up a little bit in the halls
in the weeks leading up to it. Yeah, so we go out and
un T plays that day. I think I had like a three o'clock game
or something. So we're getting out there like early. I mean it's like
nine am, and it's on this field near the practice field. To show
how shot it is, they dump it off to a journalist. He runs
into the end zone. We tag him. He keeps running. Okay,
well you didn't go down. So apparently we're doing more than touch. And
someone has the bright idea. As it's just a bunch of amped up twenty
year olds, someone has the idea, let's play tackle tackle. Oh like,
and the game had started, that's when you decided this. Yeah,
that's that should have been discussed prior. Oh my god. So I can't
do much down the field, but if you need a sure shot five yards,
yeah, stay in front of the chains, give it to the tank.
Hit me little five yard girl. I turned up field the proper way,
the other way from where you caught it, and my head meets the
tooth of unt at the time, their field reporter for the game on the
jumbo tron. Dude, he was bleeding. There's blood everywhere, there's blood
on my head, and I'm just like, I was just playing. Yeah,
I don't know, I was running, but dude, it hurt.
And I remember that, but I remember feeling so bad for him. He
had the whole right side of his face is just swollen and there's blood everywhere.
There's a gash that was right underneath his eye, and it was all
just like, I mean, if we're just playing touch, then maybe I
catch it. Yeah, you voted stock, you voted tackle. Like I
didn't want to tackle, trust me. I was like, this is stupid.
We get the ball to okayogo play. I'm not gonna play defense,
so I'm not tackling anyone. Yeah, screw that. I wrecked that guy.
I mean, Machine probably remembers it more than I do because I was
a little concussed. But Machine, everybody, Mike Marshall works in the Mavericks
was there and was like, oh my god, you killed him. I
mean got it killed him. It was insane, dude, and It's like
to this day, if I ever run into my friend Ben Baby, who
covers the Bengals for ESPN, Now that went to U and T and he's
like, I mean that time he killed that guy he was in the game.
Yeah, he's so tidy with the guy do the game. I don't
know. I didn't go to the game, so I don't know his tooth
get knocked out or no, no, but blood. Oh it was everywhere,
dude. I mean it was like, this is dumb. This is
why grown ups don't play tackle. Dude, don't ever play tackle. We're
all in shorts, right. How about when you agree to play tackle back
in the day whatever, you know, like there's sort of even a code
to tackle even you know, no pad tackle. And then you have one
dude who's Sean Taylor. Yeah he's like, oh tackle, okay, Oh
I'm in it. Just full send. It has good anticipation too, yes,
like what are you doing? I don't need Sean Taylor, but just
kind of grab on and drag him down, like play normal ass rally Cooper
and wedding crashers. His best role, by the way, if I had
to have his best role, that or the Eagles fan cam, which is
they kept zoom to yesterday. He's there. He's warming up for the game,
doing a bicycle on his back and then he kicks himself up. I
mean, is that wedding he's on? This? Was he a serious tackle
man? Yeah? I don't remember. Another move was back pedaling. He's
just destroying Vince Vaughan just looking at why he's warming up. It's such a
great move, the bicycle on your back and then kimp up. Yeah,
he ever tried to do a kimp up. There's no way that goes so
poorly I'll break a bone. No, yeah, not even close. It
would hurt too much. We'll see what we can crap. Hey, like
the intro above, crap over the weekend to talk about crap five day,
we can crap six day week and crap. Right, No, I don't
know you were off Wednesday. I worked Wednesday, but I was off the
week before that, so that was nice. Huh. Yeah, it was
a really good strategy too. Honestly, I'm glad you ended up going on
Wednesday and me working is like work a day which I wore sweatpants up here
and mailed it in. So it was great. Really, Yeah, it
was JJ looking at you like, Miles Garrett. He's like, no,
no, No, she was looking at me like would you be a professional
for once? Whenever she was looking at she looks at us like that a
lot. Yeah, she just never has looked at us like a year at
all. No, we're not three Miles Garrett's in here for you. No,
not at all. I just talked about struggling playing football during Thanks Davie,
go tackle so hard, please hurt. In our defense, we said
nothing about how we look shirtless with sweatpants on and how we're backing. Yeah
inside, what NFL player or celebrity we all is a favorite? Okay,
let's get on. Yeah what NFL player? Because I'm probably what Kelsey you
know? Oh okay, dude, I feel like I'm okay On a good
day. I could be Scoonmaker on a good day. No one really knows
he looks like you know what, You're right, I'm tired of Maker.
I don't know what he looks like. He's not pretty eyes, the blue
eyes. Maybe I might be Sean McEwan. I don't know what he looks
like. Yeah, no one does. I think we're all tight ends.
Anytime you need to get generic white dude. A football position positions not big
enough to be any alignment. You're not playing any real skill position. But
Danny prior tight end, Danny slender, he's slender man. Danny's You're kind
of your Nico Collins, the tall skinning guy Adams. Yeah, he's not
that tall. No, he's down the thick too a little bit. It's
pretty literary. I think, I don't know here. You can work on
that you have till the rest of the year. Okay, you'll need I'll
need all that. What you do in Florida man chilled. Yeah it was
great though, weather good. Yeah, yeah, I mean I was dumping
rain when we got there. I had to. I just stand outside for
the turkey pick up, like we did. The What we do have in
Sarasota, Florida is Amish people, okay, and the Amish people are a
very hard working, good cooking crew. You don't run across many Amish people
around here. If you're Amish, call in, yeah, dude, Amish
to Amish Monday ninety seven on the Freak two and four eight seven seven eight
seven. If you're Amish, what if our ratings just dominant the station we
need any number one can get number one amongst the Amish. Ninety seven won
the Freak. We're number one in prison. Yeah, we are good in
prison. I know. It's a whole region of Sarahota that's like Amish people
always has been. There's always a couple good restaurants Yoders, and you go
in there and you will pay very very good prices for a mountain of delicious
food. So if I didn't want to cook, so I ordered everything pick
up from an Amish restaurant. So when we landed, we had to go
scoop it up. Oh the pies, and we did go with key Lime
pie, but there was twenty five pies that you choose from. They love
making pies. Do you feel like you gained weight? I no idea like
a lot of weight, four pounds when I weighed myself this morning, I
should have checked because I definitely feel like five to ten. Yeah, and
I don't even like Thanksgiving food. The amount of sweets that have taken over
to Thanksgiving. Yeah, it's a problem. So yeah, I had to
go wait and pick up the turkey from there. It was nice, you
know, everything packaged and you just kind of warm it up and Thanksgiving is
served. I also have a problem. There's a little sandwich shop in Florida.
It's called Anna's Sandwiches. Anna's Deli been there forever. It's my favorite
sandwich in the world, the Surfer. So every time I go there,
I will get like five of five of these surfers and have them in the
fridge the entire time I'm there and just eat. They're cutting quarters. You
just eat a nice quarter sandwich. You just anytime I pass the refrigerator,
I'm going with the quarter of the Surfer. So, yeah, a lot
of food stuff that's I'm sure. Uh it's this circle. It's it looks
almost like a Shlotsky circle, but it's a marbled rye okay, but soft.
And then it's just really thinly sliced turkey and ham, a little bit
of Swiss cucumber is the key, very thin leaf, very thinly sliced cucumber.
And then little Anna's sauce and it's in the it's like these four quarters.
It's delicious. I almost have brought you guys one. They're that damn
good. Yeah, butthing you got to put it in the plane and it's
you know, yeah, my mom brought one when I graduated college in Arizona.
All right, she brought a cooler full of an a sandwiches to me.
Oh yeah, it was very sweet. The one thing that'll make him
happy. Yeah, wearing his graduation outfit and going bald. When'd you get
back. It's Saturday night, Saturday night. Yeah, it was great though.
Man, it was beautiful. It's really nice. I mean, other
than you know, a little bit of rain. It was nice. Fight.
His house is great and you're chilling in Florida. We barely left the
house, although one night we went out to Ceskey and we have some friends
who live out there, and we just went out, you know, drinking
and man, Friday after Thanksgiving, and I think every Friday or every night
it's yester Key, old people getting hammered, hardy and laughing at the rest
of the world in this. In this, you know, as the sun
sets, you're in a tiki hut and there's some band playing, Paul Simon
and Steely Dan and they sound great and you're just just getting wasted and laughing
and being thankful for what you have. Kind of Yeah, I got hit
the Florida people. You are a different breed. Thank you so much.
But there were I mean, nice, good people, not even like rednecky
or whatever, like stereotype people throw it down with every state or whatever the
hell it is. Yeah, it was awesome. Christina is like obsessed with
dad jokes. She just loves them, so I try to hit her with
some sometimes. That's why she laughed at me a lot when she thought you
were hilarious. Uh. I took a picture of her dog taking a dump
at my house and I text her a new call of duty just dropped on
the day that call of duty came out. But I do it intentionally.
I know it's bad. I know she knows that it's a bad dad joke.
So it's funny because it's true. If someone hits me with a dad
joke, I have to report back to her immediately. So I was at
that old people party and I was in line at the bathroom. It was
called people in front of me, and this old guy was in there,
and he walks out of the men's room and holds the door open for me
and kind of does the other hand gesture into the bathroom. He goes,
hey, it's all urine. That's just not even a fool. It's like
a like I can't wait to tell It's like he completed the short past,
but we had an illegal man downfield that's coming back. I don't know.
You got to finish the joke fully, it's all You're pretty solid. So
I ran back and told Christina and she was happy it made her week anyway,
it was awesome. Yep. Got back Saturday night. UH no problems
on the travel front. I got a little bit in Mikey's Morning News about
the UH travel concerns of the last week and just how smoothly the second busiest
airport on planet Earth handle thing. Oh oh oh. I went to,
well, I'll be quick here. Yep, oh exactly, I do it
now. Thanksgiving Day, I go to Rockx's families, which I'm the only
white guy, and then I find out post Thanksgiving hangout that her cous in
Gato has instagram me as I'm standing in the living room just waiting on a
seat open up so I can sit down. During the Cowboy game while Freddy
Jones is playing the trumpet or the trumpet's being piped in and Freddie Jones's mouth
sinking. Tell me he's not lip syncing the trumpet. No, I've heard
it, yes, oh yeah from people who work there, But we don't
have to ruin a good national anthem. He's great, he's awesome. Keep
running him out there. And then I find out that he has posted cousin
brought her white boyfriend and he has to stand for the national anthem. Wait,
and I'm like they did yeah. So I'm like okay. So I
find out like two hours later that he's instagrammed that about me. So there's
just a weird passive aggression in the house. Keep in mind, they really
happened to have the power to speak two languages. I need to learn Spanish
just for the sheer fact of like knowing when they're talking about me. So
I have some sort of leverage. He posted a picture of me that said
her his cousin brought you, yeah, brought his white boyfriend whatever. Yeah,
and he had to stand for the national anthem. Tell me I how
two hundred thousand views and like, oh my god, it never stood.
Every time I walk in and it's like all the white guys here, I'm
like, okay, comedy routine starts racism. Huh, that's funny, Huh,
that's funny. I'm just saying, what point does this turn the other
way racism towards to white people. I'm a victim. We are a victim.
I'm a victim. No one has a harder nose. But you know
that's all I did. That's hometown. He had to stand. I I
sideyvite. I was expecting her to get out of her chair and stand for
the national anthem that she would never in a million years do if we weren't
there, but just to put on the show that she didn't. I was
like, man, I'm really just being respectful and not taking a seat for
one of the other you know, female cousins. You know, let them
sit down. You know, it was really just being respectful. And then
I find out on Instagram two hours later, sitting in the living room drunk,
sir. It's like, what the hell? It's not very nice.
And then they all start talking their language and you'll never know that. I
was. You can't even comprehend what's going on. Hispanics love them though,
I love them, love them. Are you starting to pick up a little
bit you can pick up them? Oh? Yeah? Man. It took
three semesters of it college or whatever. How many DearS out to take and
I cheated my way through it. But whatever, I get bye, I
got bye. Yeah, that's all good. Let's go to the most important
thing in the world, Nike. Yeah got it. It's a big day
to day. If you thought Black Friday was something, Cyber Monday is today.
And this thing is wilder than it's ever been. Let's shit chat next
right here on this radio station. Ninety seven won the Freak