The Johnson Whack Paul Brian with Fiver McGhee and Folly, The Lakers of Johnson's Blacks and Johnson's Self Polishing glow Coats present River McGee and Polly written by Don Quinn, the songs for the King's Men and music by Billy Mills. Show opens with free Fall. The kitchen is such an important room in the house, you can't blame a woman for wanting to make it cheerful and convenient. In the first place, it's her work room where she spends a good many hours. Also at a room where both neighbors and family like visit, why shouldn't it be a pleasant room with colorful curtains, convenient cabinets and the beautiful, easy to keep clean floor, That, of course, is where Johnson's Blowcoats comes in. A floor that's kept sparkling with blowcoat does wonders for your kitchen, keeps it clean and bright with a minimum of work. And don't forget that the regular use of Johnson's self polishing blow coat make sure anoleum last from five to ten times longer. Now you know, of course, that blowcoat needs no rubbing or buffing. Its self polishing blow coat gives a floor lasting luster, has a flexible film that wears evenly and smoothly without chipping. And glow coat is economical because a little goes a long way. But for real glow coat results don't be satisfied with anything but the original Johnson self polishing glow coat with a familiar red and yellow label finds on tomorrow, the worst blizzard in seventy six years has hit the Wistful Vista. Snow has drifted up to the second floor windows in some places. And this is one of the places, the home of Fiber McGhee and Molly Well. It certainly is nice to stay home by a warm fire tonight, isn't it, dearie? I'll say in a fifth night after man Or Hitler, I tell you must be terribly cold out cool. Well, when I come home tonight, that snowman in front of Hoopses was blowing on his fingers. See what's the exact temperature? Stick your head out the door and see what the thermometer on the port said. Oh no, I wouldn't for two might post out those portals tonight for all the retreads in Detroit. I'm sorry, well, and turn on the radio. It's just time for the weather report. We'll say it isn't that. I wonder just how cold it is? Terribly thanks plan. At least we're comfortable and warm. Here. Do you want to play a game of rummy deardy? No? I got a lot of stuff to do. Never have a better chance to do him to either. Just what have you got to do? Oh? I gotta paste my defense stamps, my book store, out my top flies, and write a letter to answer Sarah, thanking her for my Christmas present. He didn't send you any Christmas presents. Well, I'm in a sarcastic mood. I'm glad you're going to be busy, megie. Maybe I can finish knitting this. Uh, this this what I wish I knew. I'm not much of a knitter yet. It's not here a needle pointer, I know, but the army has some silly objections to needle point sweater. Now, maybe if I dis my gosh, there's somebody at the door. You know, that's what I love about you, you McGee. You grasp things so quickly. Well, let him in. They'll freeze to death out there. Okay, but if it's a good humor, man, he ain't using good judgment, you believe me, mister George wind goes through you like a collector from the internal revenue. What you say your name was bud Its Selvin, George Shelbn. You're mister McGee. That I am, that I am, indeed, and this is my wife, Molly, Molly, mister spell, Oh, how do you do? I'm sure delighted, madam by. It's nice and cozy in here. Go tell me you're knitting on a tiny garment. Congratulations. When is the happy event? Huh? It isn't a tiny garment. It's a sweater for a soldier. And if I don't stop dropping stitches, it won't be a happy event either. Have a care spell about it, spelling man, thank you, But first i'd better drop this overcoat. And he's went over to McGee. Hm. I don't know, but I wouldn't turn a dog away on a night like this. And he looks kind of like an old hound I used to have. Hell. Well, well, have a chair, Selvin, old man, thank you, Thank you. A nice place you have here, missus McGee, thank you. We like it. We have to we almus hell. I imagine you'll be seeing a great deal of it for the next few days. You won't be able to get downtown to a restaurant till this storm is over. Well, so hot home, it's where the heartburn is. I always says, did you want to see me about something? Sulvin? Oh, oh, yes, And mister McGee, I have a special message for you from the governor. Heavenly days from the Governor. Maybe you've got an appointment Garie. Well, it's about time. I volunteered for everything for Mayor aid warden to mix and macaroons for marine on the Governor, say Selvin. Well, first, mister McGee, may I ask if you have a car every time I see it. I asked myself the same thing. Sure I got a car, but tip top condition too. You're not kidding mc gee that top tips under any condition. Well, it really doesn't matter as long as it ruts. Oh it runs that Carl W fifty five and second gear Spelvin and thirty in high go Now, Molly, you're giving George here entirely wrong impression. You see, George, you don't mind if I call you George? Do you? PHO? Not at all glad to have you mine? You see Spelvin before we were married. My wife used to go with the guy that old the steps bearcat, and she never got along. Mind me, McGhee, what does the governor say? What do you say, Spelvin? Well, the fact is McGee, it's the most importance that you, oh dear, now who you answered to? Gie? I'm right in the middle of a mistake in my knitting. Okay, excuse me a minute, joy, Oh, certainly, I suppose somebody wants me to tie some hot coffee or on my neck and go rescue there, Saint Bernard don Hey, come o lord, I'm the old timer, Molly, okay, Johnny, just for a minute, hello there, do what you doing? Mine for britten or crouchine for the meleean if we can't stand as applause, can we fall? Good evening? Mister ol Dyer. May I introduce you to mister Selvin. Mister Selvin, this is mister mister Hey. What is your name anyway? Miss l Teimer? Yeah, I don't believe I ever heard it either. Just call me old timer. Kids. Names don't matter. It's character that counts. Dog the first crew, blue, honest, straightforward. But we're all don't be so figh. What's your name? Tom on, old timer. After all, it couldn't be worse than fibber. Maybe not, Johnny, but I'm more sensitive than you were, won't it, Ellie? Nope, just tell me. Nope, whispers my ear. I won't tell anybody, Promise, I promise. Okay, there's a heavenly days. It couldn't be tears, though. Can you imagine, mister Sells and this is the old timer, how do you do? Oh son? Try to butt in like this? Kids just wanted to know f I could bawl a hot poker a hot poker? No, I'm sorry, old timer. Our poker's bust blots the nurse? Did you want that for? Hold me and my girlfriends? Your girlfriend? No, my girlfriends, Francais. We're playing in the snow along the street here, diving into snow grips. All of a sudden, I miss praying, must knock yourself out in the fire hydrant or something. Anyway, she's under a grip someplace wrong here, And I was gonna jab around with a hot poker. Oh guess I can use the sime stick. See you later, kids, good night, mister tails fam. Won't you have another cup of coffee before you and the geese start coughing business, missus selsan Oh, Franks, I believe I will delicious coffee, missus McGee, I'm glad you like it. I make it from a recipe I got from McGee's half sister. Best What do you mean half sister? She's my sister since she worked for that magician and his daughter in too. Oh yeah, I forgot that. That's a family joke. Spell. We always kid Bessy about wanting to go on the state Oh is that so you know? I had a younger brother, always wanted to go on the stage. Finally made it too good for here. Yes, he was out in Desert Springs, Arizona, once and he wanted to go to dry Gold's New Mexico, but the trains weren't running, so he went on the stage. Well, let's get down to business, Selvin. As long as you represent the governor, suppose you tell me just exactly what he wants me. I have, for goodness sake, more orphans of the storm. See who tis me? Okay, excuse me a minute, Selvin, while I figure what's no good? This ill wind is lorn it? Oh gord, Hey, molly puppies, here, come on in nuppy, how do you do, Abigail May I present mister Speldan, mister Selsan, Missus Upton, how do you do not see Missus Uppington through whose windows comee through a rock? The very same, Melvin, the very thing. Will you have a cup of coffee, abigad you look coffee cold? Thank you? I will, my dear, and I am cold in sect, I'm christ numb. That's what I was telling Molly just this morning. Yuppy, I says that Uppington frail is just about me gee, he said numb. Oh, hey, what are you doing out on a night like this, Uppy? This kind of weather is only good for one thing, keep the Germans rushing back from the Russian front to get it talks. I said, he's funny. I thought it was rather amusing. Missus McGee, Oh thanks spell ham a sack. I, oh thanks, I have one. You got to thanks ansying your question? Is McGee? I had little TV out for a walk. She adores the snow. You know? Is Pep your daughter, Missus Uppington. Pepe is a Peakinese. Mister Spellson, Oh interesting, I'd love to meet her. Chinese girls are so intelligent, I said, I'd love to discuss the situation. He is a dog Spelton, and she ain't interested in the porn situation as I'm a thing. It was too left and too cool outside. I was greatly afraid of being lost to Tom, and yours was the only light I could see for simple blocks, my dear, So I struggled through the zips and finally succeeded in farcing my way through the snow to your front's doors. But we're seepe oh, I took her home first. Well, sit down and take a load off your eye. Miller's uppy, mister Smeelvin here was just about to give me a message from the governor as the metro's bag. What we need is a door man. Does anybody here knowing the unemployed? Ask aboard? But ye who knee? Okay, all right, all right, all rush, good boy? Oh gee, thanks Fipper. My hands was the cold. I couldn't find the doorbell. I had the hammer with my elbows. Haven't you got sense enough to stay home on a night like this, Harlow, Well, my conscience was bothering me, Sipper. I just ran across a book I borrowed from you a long time ago. Here. Oh, thanks? What is it? Oh? If winter comes you sure? This is mine? Yep, I borrowed it in nineteen twenty five. Hey is that coffee? I smell it is and you do? Come on in, Harlow Hellow, mister Wilcott, how do you do, mister Wilcot. Hello, missus Uppington. Follow. This is mister George Spelvin. Spell the old man. This is Harlow Wilcox, your Anoleum's best friend and severe critic. I'm glad to know you, Miss Wilcote. Well, this is a coincidence. Missus Selvin. I was demonstrating Johnson's self polishing blook or to a missus Spelvin yesterday afternoon, showing her how easy it was to apply, how quickly it tried to a beautiful polish, how the easier homework would take years off her life and put them on the life of the elanoleum. Let me see. No, it wasn't missus felsn either was missus Woods or no Crawford. That was it, Missus Crawford. No relation. I suppose tall, dark woman with a mole on her arm. No short and stout with a poodle on her lap. No relation, I guess. Oh, speaking of poodles, mister Wilcott, I hated to take missus Cepi out tonight. Well, there's nothing like a dog. There's nothing like up He's dog. I'll go that far with you. There ain't even another dog like her dog. I had a dog one, ah Man's best friend. I always say, just like Johnson's glow coat is a woman's best friend because it saves so much time. And after sevendy days, mister Wilcox, can't you forget Downson's glow coat for one minute? I don't know. I never tried, As I was saying, I had a dog one I did too, part Springer Spaniel on his mother's side, and the smartest dog I ever knew on his father's side, Smarter than a human being. Well he was. Every Sunday morning he'd go out on the porch and look both ways up and down the street. Then he'd kind of shake his little heads and come back in the house. Every Sunday morning for eleven years he did that. What was he looking for? We never knew. He knew, but we didn't, So he was smarter. Not I'll have another up a coffee too, man as I was going to say I had a dog once. Mother George's is gonna die of old age before he gets the end of the discussion. Excuse me while I see who's at the door. Oh, thank you, glad you dropped in La Trivia. The conversation around here is going to the dogs. Hey, everybody, here's Mayor La Trivia. Well you know, mister Spelvin, your honor, mister Spelvin, this is Mayor Na Trivia. I had a dog. What Oh, excuse me, I'm glad to meet you. How do you do? Are you a resident of our fair city? Mister Selvin? No, he don't mold here La Trivia, so you can let go his hand. Now, mister Selvin represents the governor. Mister Mayor, oh he does. Well. Well we're well. I see where mister Selvin and I can spend a profitable few minutes together. We can have a cup of coffee, mister Mayor. Thank you, and the nag sandwich. I I just stopped in to tell you McGee that the complaint has reached my ears. I had the same thing last summer. La Trivia started in my neck and reached my ears in two days. The doctor says, it was just the McGee. Please. I was about to say that I have received the complaint from the street commissioner that you have been remiss in the matter of snow removal from your front sidewalk. Oh well, thanks for warning me, La Trivia. It's a funny thing too. I really enjoy shoveling snow. You do, you do? I surely do. I'd rather hear the frosty clang of a snow shovel on a sidewalk than the finest symphony music in the world. The peel of red blood coursed through my veins as I swing that shovel to and fro. That marvelous glow that comes from exercising in the cold winter air, The sharp tang of the wind on my cheeks as my muscles responded, a healthy rhythm, and what an appetite, I guess, sleep like a baby. I love the feeling of the snow folded McGhee. Where are you going with Mayor? I'm going to shovel your walk off for you. I haven't felt like that in years. There's there's no couples right in here. Look at why are we gi right here in the hall? Clock that is straight not that father of one of these days the Kingsman saying, hey, you and Carol, okay. That tells a couple yellow can always find some one to pass a danaa her other law will soon or yet if he's insistent and she's as will come fast him. Okay that Carol is there? Is there? Only you'll say yes, don't be cast with the blushing side and the gay and chair standing back her side, he'll be so excited on his wedding day. Ask him if the laser and you'll hear him say pc Lasagnelisa Hemosita Cca. Look at Patom back on his ranchom with this Patiza by his side. He thinks he's had them more than random to di, she say, blushing ride the gay chair. So very happy is he? The yeah, you're very happy? Is he? All the world? This very happy? And chill this gig yell one thing not to I once lost hold. Here's a little secret that I'm as sunfold or they found the plumbets that they had in Stom. Now they're really counting nor more and maybe more. Hey, everybody, look, I think the storm's butting up a little. Yeah, so off any if you want to get home before you really get hold I don't want to go home, Molly. I'm having fun. So am I missus McGee and I can talk to your husband later. Won't you join us? Ideas? And when you get through making the sandwiches? He wasn't making any sandwiches. Oh he wasn't. No, but I will I guess. Varna Buge can take a hint without being hit in the face with a wet bathing sukes. Well, i'll join you guys here. What's Glenn? We're playing sinky d what a nurser? Sinky d? Oh? Look it's my turn. I'll show you all right. I'm thinking of a contented insect in an auto robe. I knew I knew, a snack bug in a chadrag. Now you're playing to sell this all right? Now? What's a wide awake quintet in a juke joint? All that season, a live five and a jive dive? Oh, this game is a sense Let me try do this. Go ahead, okay, I'm thinking of a tired ending in a borrowed teepee. Give up, I spent gend and a antenta. Oh hey, you didn't give us time to guess BP Oh you wouldn't have got it anyway, Go ahead, Molly to return. All right, I'm thinking of a hand painted spark plug dancing with a red haired kangaroo on a Wednesday afternoons. Good. I kind of think what that would be? Easy? Can I? So I'll go out and make some standards. I have had son, Oh dear, go see who that is? Mc gee? It made me an extra food more confident. Okay, excuse me, folks. Oh I don't find out pretty soon much Coo, hello mister McGee. Goodness, isn't it a terrible night out? Yeah? Not did any night out? A day? Terrible to news? Because oh you have company? Well, come on in anyway, Hey, folks, here's Wallace Wimple. I don't think mister Wimple knows, mister Selson McGee, mister, good evening, mister Wimple. Oh it's nothing, is a kind missus Shelby. It's a horrible evening. I've never buzzed out of a house if I hadn't run out of cigarette. Oh you don't have to go clear to the cigar star whip. I'll give you a couple of packages. Or do you smoke? It's que beds. I didn't know your wife would lets to smoke, mister wimple, Well, she doesn't need to approve, missus mcgee' not sicky is it's any means? So she promised me a pipe last Christmas. Uh Briar Wallace, No, mister real Park's lad, she's promised. She let me have it if she ever come smoking again. You see sweetie face, Uh, sweetie face is my wife. Missus Selby. I see sweety face is simply obsessed. This half said, oh why sometimes for dinner we just have a keeping plate of spinach, a piece, just spinach. Whimp jess spinach. I pretend I don't know she has a chilly minion under his and later I run out and get a nutty bigies. We do you ever protest against such a human treatment, mister wimbley, Oh of course I had, missus Upington. Why I just last Saturday I said to her, sweetie face, I said I'd like to have a little more freedom, And she said, why Wallace here, how can you say that while you're as free as a bird? She did, really yes, And then she said, in fact, I bet you can fly, and she threw me out the winds. Your wife sounds like quite a character. Mister sweety face Wimple spell. Then his wife's name is Sweetie Pace. Well, I wouldn't want anyone to misunderstand me. Sweetie Face is really a delightful person when you really get to know it, she says. Well, I must be running along, folks. It's nice to see all of you. Be sure you can't stay at Wiland play some games, mister Wimple, Yeah, if I do it, I didn't want anyway, I'll stay. Yeah. Then now it's all three games again? Now, who does it? Just a minute, folks, just a minute, if you're welcome to stay all night and play all the games you want. But mister Scovin come here tonight with a message from the governor. I don't want to wait any longer to hear what it is. Wow, we'll go in the other room favor and let you talk. No, no, no, now we want all to hear, don't we McGee? Huh do we? Why park? We do? I'm proud of it. Oh, well, I guess we do it. That all you people thought I was kind of unimportant around here. Didn't you thought I'd never amount anything? Well, there's going to be a few opinions changed down here tonight, go ahead, spell then, old man Paul? Right, mister McGee, do you realize that your tires were out twice as fast at forty five miles per hour as they do at thirty? Why? Certainly we know all of that, But what is driving? Habits are hard to control? So what's the best answer? And automatic control? Therefore, Hey, what's all this got to do with giving Fiper a state job? Yes? Why does the governor need our car? That's what I've been getting at. It isn't so much that the governor needs your car as it is that your car needs a governor? Hey? What is this? But who do you represent? Will you never let me quite explain that, Ms McGee, I represent the Governor and Corporator Corporation of New Jersey. When you step into some homes, don't they seem to be more livable and friendly than others? A glow with warm hospitality. A wax protected home is usually a warm, friendly one. Floors that shimmer and gleam with a rich Johnson's wax polish add beauty to the entire home. They are protected to against wear and dirt, actual money saving protection, and they're so much easier to keep clean. But this Johnson's Wax protection and labor saving doesn't stop with floors wax. Your tabletops, chair arms would work also, and your window sills, Venetian blinds, shells, refrigerator shoes, luggage lamp shades. Then you'll be practicing what authorities call protective housekeeping. Right now and during the next euar or so. It's important to take extra good care of your things. Give them an occasional application of genuine Johnson's wax, which you can buy now in three forms, taste liquid and the new cream wax, especially formulated for furniture and woodwork. Oh by the way, Johnson's wax is great too for army boots and leather service equipment. Ladies and gentlemen. This country has a big job ahead of it and won't stop till it's done. We've got to get in there with our money and our work and our loyal one percent support. Yes, Uncle Sam has rolled up his sleeves and now what he needs is more sleeves, So let's give him our shirts. Good night, good night,