Welcome to iHeartRadio Communities, a public affairs special focusing on the biggest issues impacting
you this week. Here's Ryan Gorman. Thanks so much for joining us here
on iHeartRadio Communities. I'm Ryan Gorman, and we have some really important conversations
lined up for you on this Memorial Day weekend special. As we all spend
time with friends and family and enjoy the long weekend, it's important to remember
what this holiday is all about, honoring those who served and sacrificed everything for
this country. Over the next half hour, we'll check in with representatives from
different organizations committed to caring for the families of the fallen, and we'll hear
stories about brave service members who paid the ultimate price for our freedom. Right
now, to get things started, I'm joined by retired Air Force Reserve Major
Bonnie Carroll, President and founder of TAPS, the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors.
You can learn more at TAPS dot org. Bonnie, thank you so
much for coming on the show. And for those who aren't familiar with TAPS,
how did your organization come about? And tell us about the work you
do. Ryan, thank you so much, and TAPS the Trajuty Assistance Program
for Survivors is America's family of all of us grieving the loss of a military
loved one. My husband and seven other soldiers were killed in an army plane
crash, and that was back in the early nineties. At that time,
there was no organization in America to honor and honor all those who had served
and died and care for their living legacies with families who were left behind.
So in nineteen ninety four, now nearly thirty years ago, perhaps was founded
to fill that gap. This Memorial Day weekend, we have thousands of surviving
families who are coming together in Washington, DC to be with each other,
to at ten TAPS programs, workshops, care groups, sports sessions, and
just find out that they're not alone. As we honor their heroes. And
the connections that come out of those kinds of events between families of those who
served and sacrificed everything for this country, that must make a big impact on
them and help them that sense of community. It does Ryan. You know,
grief is so misunderstood. It isn't a mental illness, It isn't depression,
our anxiety. Grief is the normal human response to the death of a
loved one. What we can do for our families who are not only grieving
the loss of their loved one, but also honoring someone whose life included selfless
service and defense of the freedom of this nation. Give them a chance to
come together with others who understand, to give resources, additional supports that compliments
with the military provides, and create this wonderful opportunity. You know, we've
got a good grief camp that is going alongside our Survivor seminar for the adults,
and this year we've got about five hundred kids paired one on one with
military mentors who we've trained to work with kids who are grieving. It's fantastic.
It's just a beautiful opportunity for all our families to be together. You
know, your organization has so many resources for families of service members who paid
the ultimate price. Can you step us through some of what you have to
offer. Well, we recognized very early on it does. The military does
a magnificent job of rendering final honors, providing a final resting place, and
administering benefits to those who are eligible. But there were some services that weren't
being addressed anywhere else, including ongoing casework assistance for all those maybe who died
not in a duty status or for extended family members. So our team works
to provide additional financial support for families, resources, benefits, connections to state
and local services. We've also got a twenty seven helpline that is answered around
the clock by peer professionals, always answered live. We're very proud of that
and that's what going continuously now since nineteen ninety four. We've also got community
based care we do about last year we did a little over a thousand events
all across America to give families a chance to come together. So there's so
much the TAPS can offer, and it is first and foremost a family now
of hundreds of thousands of us who are honoring our heroes as we support each
other. We're joined now by retired Air Force Reserve Major Bonnie Carroll, who's
the president and founder of TAPS, the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors. You
can learn more at TAPS dot org and when everyone goes to the website,
Bonnie, they'll see all the different programs that you provide as well. Can
you share a little bit about that part of your organization? Oh, you
know it's wonderful. Because our organization is led by survivors, we innovate and
adapt to meet needs. We recognize that men were maybe coming to sit in
a grief group as much as women. Worse, we created other opportunities.
Our men's retreats are incredibly popular now, and we also have a whole sports
program where we partner with National the National Football League, Baseball, all the
major league sports to provide opportunities to honor heroes and also have a day for
our families to be together. So lots of things that we can do to
meet unique needs based on the relationship or the circumstance of the loss. Another
thing I wanted to touch on. Unfortunately, a lot of families, far
too many, are going to be dealing with the loss of a service member
to suicide this Memorial Day holiday. You have a program for that as well.
How does TAPS help out in that area? Two Right now, at
TAPS has over twenty four thousand military family members who have lost a loved one,
a veteran, a service member to suicide. For about fifteen years now,
we've held an annual gathering just for our survivors of suicide laws to come
together. We have an entire what we call post vention program to help families
understand the complexities of a death to suicide, to know that they are not
alone, and to now use their experiences and the insights that they have gained
looking back on their loved ones life and death to now inform prevention efforts.
We worked very closely with the Department of Defense on this and the Department of
Veterans Affairs, so our families are finding meaning and purpose in now being able
to save lives. Another feature you have on your website, and I can
only imagine how helpful this is to so many families who have lost service members.
You have an online community put together, and this is an instance where
technology can really bring people together and I'm sure help out in a whole bunch
of different ways. Wow. And that's something I guess. A blessing of
the pandemic, if there could be one, is that we all learned how
to use zoom and teams and all those platforms. But our families now have
told us, you know, maybe they couldn't have afforded, or couldn't have
traveled to come to a TAPS event, or maybe there wasn't something close enough
to them, but they said, now TAPS can come right into my living
realm. So it's made our programs far more accessible. TAPS Institute for Hope
and Healing tap dot org Splash Institute with fantastic training programs that are available free
of charge, afolutely anyone who would like to take advantage of them. So
lots of opportunities for our families to come together virtually in care groups and in
the supports sessions. And while we're talking about the website again, it's TAPS
dot org. That's TAPS dot org. You have the Grateful Nation Memorial Hero
Wall there? What exactly is that? And for those who have a service
member who has passed, who has made the ultimate sacrifice for this country,
how can they get their loved one featured on this memorial hero wall? You
know, it is so important that we honor and remember the lives of those
who we love. And we have a saying at TAPS that, no,
well someone has physically died, we've never stopped loving them, that the love
we have for them lives on, and the photos are a way that we
see them, that we bring them president of our lives. This weekend,
at our gathering over Memorial Day. We love the photos of all of our
heroes up display. We'll be wearing photo buttons with pictures of our loved ones,
and it gives us an opportunity to tell that life story, because so
often we get stuck for a bit in the death story. So our memorial
tribute on our website is another way that our families can bring their loved ones
presence, to have them seen and to speak their names. I would highly
encourage everyone listening to spend a few moments at some point this Memorial Day holiday
and go to TAPS dot org slash Grateful Nation and just take a look at
some of the service members who again served and sacrificed everything for all of us.
TAPS dot org slash Grateful Nation. And finally, Bonnie, for those
listening who want to support all the tremendous important work that you're doing, maybe
that's how they want to give back on this Memorial Day holiday. How can
they do that well, we'd love to have volunteers, and also, as
a nonprofit organization, we're very, very grateful that everything that we do is
made possible because caring Americans who understand service and sacrifice are willing to support our
nonprofits. Please visit TAPS dot org learn more about what we do, and
please help us honor those who have given so much to this country. Retired
Air Force Reserve Major Bonnie Carroll, President and founder of TAPS, the Tragedy
Assistance Program for Survivors. You can learn more and support this truly tremendous organization
at TAPS dot org. That's TAPS dot org. Bonnie, I want to
thank you so much for your service to this country, the work you're doing
with your organization, and thank you so much for coming on the show.
We really appreciate it. Thank you for the opportunity, and thank you for
all that you do to honor our fallen heroes. Thank you so much,
Bonnie, really appreciate that. I'm Ryan Gorman here on I hear radio communities,
and I want to bring in our next guest here on this Memorial Day
weekend special. We're joined now by Jim Lorraine, US Air Force combat veteran
and president of America's Warrior Partnership. You can learn more about this organization at
America's Warrior Partnership dot org. Jim, thank you so much for taking a
few minutes to join me and let's start with your general thoughts on this Memorial
Day holiday. Yeah, well, Ryan, first, thanks for having us
on. I really appreciate it. You know, this weekend, I remind
people, this weekend is really about remembrances for a great time A little bit
when when folks say, hey, happy Memorial Day. Yeah, it's Happy
Veterans Day and happy Fourth of July. But Memorial Days are rememberance time for
not only those who died in combat and in training, but those who've who've
died because of either diseases or illnesses or injuries secondary to the combat. And
the numbers are just staggering. I don't know that as a country we have
a full grasp of the gravity of this situation. At Browning University, study
found that over thirty thousand veterans have died by suicide since two thousand and one.
That's more than three times the number of those who died in combat.
And there are obviously going to be so many families across the country dealing with
those losses on this Memorial Day holiday. Yeah. Absolutely, And you know
there's it's it's a tragedy. We think We've done a study called Operation Deep
Dive, where we dig into state level data, and when we compare states
our state level data to the with the VA's reporting, our numbers are about
thirty five percent higher. So we so the number might be higher. We're
we're working hard with Duke University School of Medicine and DD to get to that
to figure it out. But I mean the number tie and I think there's
a lot of people who were struggling, and I would just I would be
remiss if I didn't mention that there's you know, there's a there's a nine
to eight eight dial one if you need help, and if you're a surviving
family member, Tragedy Assistant Program for Survivors and fantastic, and you should reach
out to him if you're really struggling. It's a tough time, a tough
time of the year, and I think on Memorial Day, the first thing
that comes to mind are those who served and died in battle overseas, and
of course we remembered them and we honor them, but we also need to
make sure we remember and honor all of those who have served and have died
by suicide, because the battle for so many of them doesn't end when they
return home. No, I agree, and I think that's lost on a
lot of people is that they think, oh, they didn't die in combat.
Well, you know, they died at secondary to their injuries that they
sustained the comeback, whether it was those seen or those unseen. UM.
I think, uh, you know, I have a I had a great
friend Ryan Joe UM, navy seal, lost his vision UM to do to
combat. UM got shot through the eyes, UM walked through his eye.
Anyways, UM died in a hospital UM due to a medical UM error.
And and they came back and everyone said, oh, you know, Deece,
he just died and said, no, he didn't. He died of
his wounds. He wouldn't have been in that hospital if it wasn't for his
wounds. And so don't don't think that the line is drawn by the time
he come home, by the time he leaves the theaters. I think I
think it's uh, it endures for a long time and and and tragically the
families have to deal with it, right. The families are the ones who
deal with it when everyone comes home and speaking to the families, tell us
about some of the gold Star families that you know, and what they've been
through and what Memorial Day weekend means to them. Yeah, I gotta tell
you. The tragedy is that I have more both star families that I shouldn't
have so many. Um Um it's uh and they and the problem is that
they they didn't. It didn't end when I left theater. It continues to
grow. Um. I have a good friend who who just took his life
a month ago, and m and his families left to figure out the why
and and pick up the pieces and and then you know he was he was
an amazing, amazing Navy seal Mike Day. And it was he was shot
twenty five times. Um, nineteen of them, nineteen of them entered his
body, the rest of his plates. And he survived. And he did
a great great they had a great life, gave so much back to everyone,
and then out of nowhere it took his life. Um. A month
before that, two months before that, Joe Kavachski Army Rangers. Um,
he was a blow that the ampte went back. Was a was a leader
of rain Ers in combat. Used to tell a story about getting in a
gunfight in theater and losing his leg because the seal was broken, and he'd
say, shoot, shoot, shoot, reach for my legs. Shoot shot,
shot, reach for my leg and he came back to me, he
said, begging another purple heart for this because they got shat in my leg.
And anyways, he took his life. He took his life two months
ago, and he was a legend in the ranger community. Suicide is terrible.
It's just a terrible thing, whether you die by suicide or you die
by overdose because you've lost hope. But then you know, we're we're a
lot of years beyond what happened in Afghanistan, and I've got it. I
was interviewed a little bit ago and they said, you know, why do
you think the number of calls into the call center the VA HAT line went
up in March? I said, because it's the it's the anniversary of leaving
Afghanistan, and nobody's happy about it, and it's we struggle with it every
day anyways. I it's I think we're going to have a struggle for the
next ten to twenty years. And I that's a terrible thing to say,
but I think unless unless we get things right, we're going to have a
struggle. That's what we're trying to do. It America's Warrior Partnership is get
it Right. I'm Ryan Gorman, joined now by Jim Lorraine, US Air
Force combat veteran and President of America's Warrior Partnership. You can learn more at
America's Warrior Partnership dot org. So tell us about some of the work that
you do in trying to prevent veteran suicide, trying to make sure that other
families aren't dealing with the loss of a loved one next Memorial Day. Yeah,
and thanks Ryan for the opportunity to do this, because I think it's
important. We have a program called the called the Network, and in the
Network, what happens is that every veteran um, any veteran or their family
can call us any era, disability or not. They can call us and
if if they need help. We're not we're not just a website, but
we're more of a relationship with people. And what we found is is if
you show that show the veterans in their families that you really care for them
and that it's not just so not just transactional where you call me and you
need help and I give you that help and it's done. But if you
call me and you need help, and I help you, and then I
ask you how you're doing and what's next, and what's next and what's next.
Last year we we serve fifty three hundred veterans. Ninety two of the
time we were successful in in serving them. UM. We work with some
great companies UH and there and there their veterans within the companies. Companies like
Wells Fargo and Parton. We we serve their veterans in their companies. But
we're open to everyone. And the point is is that that that when you
leave the service sometimes you don't feel like anybody gives a darn. And I
want people to know that Americas were your partnership, We give a darn,
and that that if you need help, we'll help you, and we'll reach
out to you. We'll provide you with the support that you need. That's
more than just counseling. It's it's really to what our goal is is to
increase the level of hope amongst our veteran community. Because I think the veterans
suicide rate and the veteran overdoes rate secondary to hopelessness. And if we can
improve somebody's future, they're less likely to take their life in the short term.
Again, you can reach the Veterans Crisis Line at nine eight eight and
then just press the number one. Finally, Jim, how can everyone listening
on this Memorial Day weekend support the important work that you're doing at America's Warrior
Partnership. Well, you know, we're a nonprofit, so financial support is
always appreciated, so we can continue to do the work. But quite frankly,
as partner with us. If you've got a program that serves veterans,
we want to partner with you. If you or somebody who can provide services
the veterans, we want to partner with you. Our motto Ryan is together
Comma we can do better. So together we can do better. And that's
really what we seek to do. Whether it's government or non government. We
want to partner with you and keep the veteran in their family in the center
of the scope and focus on them. Jim Lorraine, US Air Force combat
veteran and president of America's Warrior Partnership. You can learn more and support all
the work they're doing. Get involved at America's Warrior Partnership dot org. Jim,
I want to thank you so much for coming on this Memorial Day weekend
special. Of course, thank you for your service to this country, and
we'll talk to you again real soon. Ryan, thanks so much for having
us. I really appreciate it anytime. Jim. I'm Ryan Gorman here on
iHeartRadio Communities and now want to bring in our final guest on this Memorial Day
weekend special. I'm joined out by Marine veteran Tony Porto, who's here to
talk about Simplify and America's funds and honor the two marines that saved his life
fifteen years ago this month. Tony, thank you so much for taking a
few minutes to come on the show, and let's start with your thoughts on
what this Memorial Day holiday means to you. Memorial Day for me, it's
always really hard because when I when I got injured in Iraq and back in
two thousand and seven, I lost two of my two two good friends,
Master Sergeant Mac and Couple Palmer. I was I was the only survivor in
that humpy that day, and and it's a Saturday for me, it's a
Saturday for me. But but even though it was hard, took me several
years to recover in but I don't think I will ever recover from from the
loss of two great men, and tell us a little bit about those two
Marines who served and sacrificed everything for this country. Yes, one of them
was Master Sergeant mac Kenneth in Uh. The other one was couple Almer Charles.
Uh. They were. They were great mirines, great marines in in
May fifth, two thousand and seven. That's that's when I lost them.
When I lost them eye. Like I said, I was the only survivor
that day. But after after that, they they gave me. They gave
me Marco. I after recovering from my injuries, I met a beautiful wife
and I got a son. And that's where I named my son after my
two friends. Kenneth Child's Poor and the families of those two marines, what
does this Memorial Day holiday mean to them? Well, yes, Uh,
it's really hard for them. It's really hard hard for them, especially when
we lose a service member that have children, have a wife. That day,
I was I was the only one that didn't have a wife, didn't
have kids. And it's sad for them because right because now they don't have
a dad, a husband, both of them, both of the families,
and it's really hard for them, it's really hard. Let's talk about Simplify
and America's Fund, an organization caring for our critically wounded, ill injured service
members, also veterans, military families, and they support all branches of the
US Armed Forces. Everyone can learn more at the fund dot org. How
did you first get linked up with Simplify in America's Fund? Yes, uh,
when I when I got injured in Iraq, I was mad it back
to San Antonio, Texas because that's I get burned all over my body,
my wayy percent of my body was burned, lots of my right arm,
lots of a lot of fingertips in my left hand, and a lot of
French clearing my face, chest, legs are left arm, and the doctors
didn't know if I was going to make it right not, so I was
I was sent to San Antonio, Texas, but I'm from Maryland. My
entire families from Maryland in the molitary with the Marine Corps. Flew my mom,
my dad, my sister. Because like I said, doctors didn't know
if I was going to make it or not. But after a lot of
surgeries, I was able to get a little bit better. But I'm being
from Maryland and being in another state, it was really hard special for the
families because they and my mom my dad, they both had jobs. My
sister was still in high school and they he left everything behind, everything behind,
and that's that's where my family met semplified find first they told they told
my mother, do not worry about your job, do not worry about your
house, because they still had a payments to do for the house and they
covered all of that. And when I woke up the first time, that's
when I met a really nice lady Karen in Schandra Sailor and they told me,
do not worry about anything. You get better, will take care of
you, will take care of your family for the rest of your life.
And there was a big, big help because like I said, it was
one. It was really hard with all the pain and surgery is almost almost
every week. But um, but the most difficult part was seeing my mother
and my father that they were going to lose everything that they have worked before,
their house, everything, everything in and just used to have someone that's
telling me that do not worry. You did your duty and now it's our
time to to help you in your in your family and UH and they help
me with everything when I when I got out, when I was able to
get out from from the hospital, I was staying in the hotel with my
entire family, with my mother or my father or my sister in one room.
And and that's what I called Semplify fund and I told him I want
to get out from the hospital. After year, I think I am ready.
I'm ready to go to a place where at least I can I can
sleep for a good eight hours without having all the machines around me and have
a different environment. And they told me do not worry about about it.
I will will get you a department so you can stay with the family,
and they help it with everything. Uh. I was in and out of
the hospital for six years, and they my father. I went back to
San Antonio. I'm sorry to Maryland. During those years with my sister,
but I had over one hundred thirty eight surgeries and it was really hard.
It was really hard. My mom couldn't do everything for me, so sometimes
I had big surgeries and I had to call my dad for help. And
that's when Simplified on stepping again to cover all the flights expenses, um um,
paying for the mortgage, for the house in Maryland that they that they
had, and for everything everything, even now after so many years, sometimes
it's really hard dealing with the VA. Sometimes I'm a I'm a brand patient
here in approaching uh In Martin's PAVA, I might be the only only patient
here that have a lot of a lot of brands, and sometimes the care
that I need, I cannot get it right away. In the Cemplify Fund,
just cover everything everything for me. They've They've been so helpful for me.
And not not just me, there are thousands and thousands of Marines,
Army soldiers homeward. They help every branch. Just just imagine covering all all
those expenses so so we can so we can get better. They do an
amazing job on everything. And again everyone can learn more and support this great
organization, Semplify and America's Fund at the fund dot org. That's the fund
dot org. Marine veteran Tony Porto with us on this Memorial Day weekend.
Special Tony, I want to thank you so much, obviously for your service
and your sacrifice for this country, and also for sharing the story of those
two Marines with us as well. We really appreciate it. Thank you,
sir, all right, and that's going to do it for this special Memorial
Day weekend edition of iHeartRadio Communities. As we wrap things up, I want
to offer a big thanks to all of our guests, and of course to
all of you for listening again. The organizations where you can find out more
and offer your support on this Memorial Day holiday go to TAPS dot org,
America's Warrior Partnership dot org, and The Fund dot org. I'm your host,
Ryan Gorman. I'll talk to you again real soon.