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Fish ocks, a penny from nineteen
seventy one, something bent and warped,

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too light to be valuable, a
bit of old jewelry, perhaps smashed against

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the rocks. Why am I doing
this? I must like standing in the

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rain. I must like the heady
smell of seaweed and salt, a crisp

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sound of wet sand beneath my feet, the inevitable feel of it between my

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toes. Despite the sturdy shoes and
thick wooly socks that I wear, this

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beech is littered with cheap tat and
nothing else. I've been coming here for

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years, drawn by the excitement of
a silver coin found in two thousand and

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eight. Since then I found the
odd musket ball, but nothing of any

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real value. Most of the time, when I get down on one knee,

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I anticipate disappointment, and yet here
I am still scanning the sand and

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rocks, looking for another one in
a million find with my detector. But

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there's nothing here. This place has
been combed thoroughly, not by competing hobbyists,

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but by myself, slowly and painfully, over a process of years.

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This is hardly a place for sunbathers. The sloping cliffs rise overhead as I

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pick my way along what little sand
lies between the rocks and the ocean.

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Seagulls coast lazily in the sky,
but down here on the ground, the

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wind is fierce, and so is
the sea. White horses race furiously towards

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the land, breaking not far to
my right, folding themselves to pour lazily

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at all clumps of rotting seaweed and
stubborn rocks. I am alone, standing

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at the feet of giants. For
a moment. I take my headphones off

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and look around, my senses battered
by the wind, I stinging. I

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scanned the way back when I began, there was an old man going for

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a walk, But it's nowhere to
be seen now not long, and the

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tide will raise the way back.
This isn't a popular beach, not with

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families. Nudists sometimes come here during
the winter to go racing into the waters,

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screeching and giggling, titillated and thrilled. Those nude retirees visit this place

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for much the same reason I do. It's not good for bathers, swimmers,

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serfs, or much else. The
rocks are dangerous riptides funneled by powerful

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00:02:54,400 --> 00:03:00,599
geography, have claimed more than a
few lives. It does to do your

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research before going for a dip,
but if you're prepared, you can be

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safe, and the tall cliffs make
for an attractive privacy barrier. Only those

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who know the area can find the
rocky path that leads down to the sand.

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Most don't even know it exists,
one of the world's forgotten little corners.

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I wonder why I'm still here when
I've wasted the afternoon looking for nothing.

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So far from comfort and warmth.
It is a long way back to

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the car. I picture the feel
of a cup of tea held in both

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hands, the sound of wind buffeting
my house and wheels, and I'm ready

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to finally call it a day and
go home. When something catches my eye.

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It glitters on the sand not far
from me, and I approach it,

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expecting a piece of litter wrapper.
Perhaps I pick it up and trace

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its shape with my fingers. My
mind moves at a glacial pace. It

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it is a gold coin. It
is cold to the touch, handmade pre

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saxon. The ancient head stamped into
its metal is strange, warped with time.

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It resembles a man with the mouth
of an anglerfish. It is beautiful.

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It is everything I've ever wanted,
solid gold and thicker than a smartphone

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00:04:40,399 --> 00:04:44,759
six months rent in the palm of
my hand. Didn't even have to use

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my metal detector. It was right
there on top of the sand. It

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must have come from the water,
placed here by those rapid waves. My

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mind conjures the image of a sunken
shipwreck a mile or two off the coast,

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to water log coffers filled with coins, just like these clusters of jewels

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gelded with silver and gold, an
ancient treasure that has finally broke loose after

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centuries of tidal warfare. That might
mean there's more. I look around,

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00:05:20,639 --> 00:05:27,240
but there's only shale and sand hundreds
of meters away, where the rocks become

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hard to navigate. Something else shimmers
in the sun, but that could easily

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00:05:31,519 --> 00:05:36,480
be a rock pool catching the sun. I should go back, I tell

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00:05:36,560 --> 00:05:43,360
myself, as I scan the beach
once more. The sea is coming behind

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00:05:43,399 --> 00:05:47,600
me. The sand is narrowed to
just ten meters. I know from experience

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00:05:47,839 --> 00:05:55,040
it will disappear faster than seems possible. Then there would just be water and

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cliffs if I get caught. The
best case scenario is that I'll be able

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to scamper up the safety somewhere and
get rescued by a helicopter. My humiliation,

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00:06:05,040 --> 00:06:11,240
paraded for all to see on local
papers happens at least once a year,

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00:06:12,879 --> 00:06:17,560
but the stakes are higher than you
might think. Another coin would make

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a year's rent. Again, that
image of a sunken chest full of treasures

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00:06:24,480 --> 00:06:30,720
flashes into my mind. Absurd.
I tell myself a child's fantasy, but

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I'm holding the evidence of it in
my hand, a gold coin. How

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often in my life has a fantasy
come true? I dig my fingers into

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the gold as hard as I can. I want to make sure it's real.

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How often does a fantasy need to
come true? Just once I mutter

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my words lost to the wind,
it is uneasy. The rocks here are

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sharp and treacherous. As a child, when my mother first brought me to

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this beach, I imagined myself walking
across a giant's fingerprint back. Then I

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glided across stone ridges, pivoting the
arches of my feet like a spinning top,

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moving effortlessly across the strange landscape.
Some of the caps are three four

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feet deep. Falling would have hurt, but I didn't fall. I was

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young, nigh invincible. It isn't
like that now. It might be my

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00:07:39,199 --> 00:07:43,120
knees, It might be the fear, it might be the nerves. But

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I wobble each time I left my
foot, my body struggling to balance ridges

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as thin as a pencil. I
fall twice, and the second time it

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00:07:54,839 --> 00:08:01,959
hurts like hell. Ripped jeans,
ripped skin, blood, a gash that

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00:08:01,079 --> 00:08:07,279
takes thirty seconds for the pain to
reach consciousness. I griped my teeth.

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Determination floods me. I look back
and realize that the sand is no longer

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00:08:15,800 --> 00:08:22,839
there. Turning back now means wet
socks and shoes angle high water. I'd

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00:08:22,839 --> 00:08:28,199
be humiliated. I look down at
the cut of my leg, watching the

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blood flow thinly into salt water until
it turns a pinkish yellow. There's another

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00:08:35,919 --> 00:08:43,159
gold coin. All thoughts of turning
back dissolve as I fumble for it in

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my fingers. I want more.
I want the coffer. I want to

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00:08:48,879 --> 00:08:52,039
run my fingers through gold like it's
liquid. I want to submerge my arms

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00:08:52,159 --> 00:08:58,399
elbow deep into the treasure. I
can't stop picturing. But the tide is

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00:08:58,440 --> 00:09:03,879
coming. The tide is here,
furious waves falling just a few feet short

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00:09:03,919 --> 00:09:09,080
of my position. This we'll have
to do two coins a year's worth of

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00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:16,960
rent. I accept this compromise and
begin to turn back. A wave hits

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00:09:16,960 --> 00:09:22,840
me. It is worse than any
punch. No boxer has ever hit this

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00:09:22,960 --> 00:09:28,960
hard. Here is a force that
shapes continents, and it has me firmly

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00:09:30,080 --> 00:09:35,000
in its grip. I can't tell
you how long this next part lasts.

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00:09:35,519 --> 00:09:41,360
There is salt, spray, foam. I am tossed about in a way

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00:09:41,519 --> 00:09:46,840
that I've never been before, like
a roller coaster without the tracks. A

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rock smashes my ribs, another,
my ankle. Something breaks. There is

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00:09:52,919 --> 00:09:58,679
darkness, there is light. I'm
dying. I'm sure of it. When

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I a it is to the feeling
of my lungs fighting for air while I

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lie on my back for a second, I'm just an animal and loving it.

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Then the breast comes flooding back,
the tide, the beaches, the

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coins. I lurch upwards and stare
at my palm clutched so tightly I have

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to will the muscles to open.
Sure enough, the gold coins are still

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there. I laugh, but the
movement hurts, and even worse, it

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00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:43,879
starts something. In just a few
short seconds, I am forced to reckon

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with three terrible facts. First,
my ribs are broken. Second, my

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ankle is broken. Third, I'm
going to be sick. The salt burns,

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but it is nothing compared to my
ribs and ankle. As I struggle

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to roll over, I cannot help
but cryers of vomit. I've never known

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pain like this. I managed four
pitiful heaves of seawater and bile before collapsing

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in a breathless fit. My chest
feels full of gravel. After a few

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long breaths, I sit up,
secure the coins in a pocket with a

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zipper, and look around. I
realize how strange the world has become.

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I am lying on a flat rock
at the mouth of a cave. I

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must have been deposited here like one
of those coins, and I count myself

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lucky. I want to look outside. I want to take register of how

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far I am along the coast and
how low the sun has fallen. But

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I cannot stand, and movement is
beyond difficult. The best I can manage

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is a crawl, and I soon
realize I'm going to need all my energy.

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A gentle lapping of water reaches my
feet and soaks my legs. And

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ass. I haven't even managed to
catch my breath to contemplate the jagged ruin

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of my ankle, and already the
tide is catching up with me. It

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makes sense. I suppose the sea
put me here, so of course it

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isn't far behind. Damn, I
hiss out loud for the first time since

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finding the coins. My mind snaps
back into what feels like a normal speed.

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I am in incredible danger, and
it's still not too late for that

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00:12:48,320 --> 00:12:52,679
look to run out. I pack
my pockets. My phone is broken and

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00:12:52,799 --> 00:13:00,519
unresponsive. My only light is a
waterproof torch I keep on my keychain Christmas

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00:13:00,519 --> 00:13:05,799
gift from my mother. She likes
that I have a hobby, she says

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00:13:05,840 --> 00:13:09,480
it makes it easier to shop presents
for me. I turned the torch on

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and almost cry at the serendipity of
it all. Until now, I've never

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00:13:16,399 --> 00:13:22,840
used it. The caverhead is roughly
waist height, and it goes deeper than

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my torch can reach. The ocean
is rising behind me, furious and losing

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00:13:28,759 --> 00:13:35,120
its catch. Thankfully, the cave
slopes upward a few meters in, so

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I begin to crawl, seeking higher
ground. I dragged myself off the flat

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rock and further into the cave.
I make slow progress across the collection of

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00:13:46,360 --> 00:13:50,960
eroded gravel, a random crap.
The water is deposited here over the years,

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fishing tackle, old nets, driftwood, her cat's skull. I cannot

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00:13:58,240 --> 00:14:03,080
help but stop at the last one. Hollow eyes glare back at me like

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00:14:03,159 --> 00:14:09,240
a warning. I shake the feeling
off and move onwards. I am losing

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the chase, I realize as the
water catches up to my belly. Damn

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00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:20,440
it, damn it, damn it. I dragged myself elbow over elbow,

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00:14:20,759 --> 00:14:26,080
like they two on those army adverts. Be the best, I think over

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00:14:26,159 --> 00:14:31,000
and over as my ankle catches on
the stones and my ribs grind in my

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chest. I haven't cried like this
since I was a child, but I

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00:14:37,240 --> 00:14:43,799
don't stop. The water is at
my chest now. The cat's skull is

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floating somewhere behind me, buoyed by
the rising sea. I don't want to

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00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:54,600
join it. At last, I
make it to where the ground begins to

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00:14:54,720 --> 00:15:01,759
rise. The darkness makes for an
ominous savior, but here is my only

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00:15:01,840 --> 00:15:07,120
chance of survival, and I cling
to it. I ignore the caveman inside

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me. He is terrified of this
place and is banging every warning drum in

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my mind that he can reach.
But I forge my way ahead regardless,

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arm over arm. My progress is
slow, maybe a meter for every ten

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minutes. I cannot say for sure. I'm no athlete. When the rising

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tunnel becomes too steep for my elbows
that offer much attraction, I dig my

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fingers into cracks in the stone and
pull myself along that way. Meanwhile,

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the water climbs still. I feel
it's icy touch, reach my collar bones

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and let out an audible cry.
I don't want to die. It terrifies

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me, the thought of it,
the pain most of all, how aimless

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is drowning I wonder less painful than
this. I want to weigh up the

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pros and cons of letting go and
sliding back into the water, but my

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00:16:10,960 --> 00:16:17,879
brain won't let me. It's all
or nothing. Instincts older than the continents

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00:16:17,919 --> 00:16:22,399
propel me, fighting to hold my
chin up. As the water reaches my

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00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:29,120
bottom lip. I failed to notice
the ground changing direction, a sudden downward

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00:16:29,120 --> 00:16:33,080
tilt that leaves my hands flailing.
I want to pause, engage the way

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ahead, but it's far too late. I am carried over the top by

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00:16:38,759 --> 00:16:47,480
a mix of gravity in the water's
currents for a moment, and then there

169
00:16:47,600 --> 00:16:56,519
is total darkness for the second time
that day. I pass out. When

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00:16:56,559 --> 00:17:02,200
I awake, I am on my
stomach and in so much pain that I

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00:17:02,200 --> 00:17:06,599
am actually able to register a glimmer
of anger at the world around me.

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00:17:07,920 --> 00:17:11,960
This is starting to feel personal,
and that spark of frustration is what gives

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me the strength to lift my head
up and try to gage where I am.

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00:17:18,119 --> 00:17:22,000
Luckily, my torch states strapped to
my wrist, and I use it

175
00:17:22,039 --> 00:17:26,680
now to see that I am in
a head hike cavern. Near By is

176
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a crack in the rock, and
from there the water drains. Lucky for

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me, or else I would have
surely drowned. Behind me lies the way

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I came. It is a nearly
vertical wall of rock, ten meters high

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and slick with algae and eroded smooth
by millennia of waves. I have no

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00:17:52,079 --> 00:17:56,920
more chance of climbing it than I
do the Empire State building. My watch

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00:17:57,079 --> 00:18:03,200
as another wave crest the top and
strikes me like a thrown bucket. Nearby,

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that crack has begun to fill backwash, lapping eagerly at my feet.

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00:18:11,400 --> 00:18:15,160
If I stay here, I will
likely drown in less than an hour.

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00:18:15,319 --> 00:18:22,880
But this isn't a death trap,
not yet anyway. The cave carries on

185
00:18:22,640 --> 00:18:29,799
another tunnel, chest height big enough
to crawl through. It bends gently out

186
00:18:29,839 --> 00:18:37,680
of sight, and something about the
darkness beyond makes my stomach curdle. For

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all I know, it terminates after
a meter, but I have no choice

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except to try. I possessed crawling
onwards around the corner. It seems safe

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at first, but then the tunnel
begins to narrow. I try not to

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00:18:55,720 --> 00:19:00,319
let it worry me. I'm on
my stomach and there is room to bear

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00:19:00,519 --> 00:19:06,519
as the ceiling gradually lowers from six
to five to four feet. When it

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00:19:06,559 --> 00:19:11,039
starts to graze my shoulder blades,
I have to suppress the need to hyperventilate.

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00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:17,000
Then it's not just the ceiling that's
getting closer. The walls on either

194
00:19:17,039 --> 00:19:22,880
side encroaching my arms, and the
panic becomes very real. I keep hoping

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they'll widen any second, but they
don't. They just keep pressing closer and

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00:19:30,599 --> 00:19:36,559
closer. I want to turn back
already I can feel water reaching my knees.

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I try to turn back and find
I can't. This realization seems to

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00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:47,039
drain the world of all color.
But I try, and as the dwell

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00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:53,200
on what it means, I keep
going without realizing what I'm doing. I

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00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:57,759
leave my arms out in front until
the walls narrow so tightly I can no

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00:19:57,799 --> 00:20:03,160
longer bend them at the l bow. I'm forced to move entirely on the

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motion of two wrists and one functioning
ankle. If I thought progress before was

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slow, this was a thousand times
worse. Time crawls to a halt as

204
00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:22,240
I struggle against my own intubment,
and I spend what could be ten seconds

205
00:20:22,559 --> 00:20:26,319
or ten hours staring at a single
bit of rock. The fingers of my

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00:20:26,440 --> 00:20:30,480
right hand working furiously, or my
left foot tries to push me forward.

207
00:20:32,799 --> 00:20:38,839
I move no more than a centimeter
at a time without warning. The panic

208
00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:47,400
hits me like a hammer blow.
I can't move. I tried to thrash

209
00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:52,359
an anger, but it's more like
a seizure. My wrists and ankles flick

210
00:20:52,359 --> 00:20:57,759
a left and right, looking for
leverage, but there's nothing. I should

211
00:20:57,799 --> 00:21:03,079
try to think clearly, but most
of my mental energy as to go to

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00:21:03,200 --> 00:21:08,160
fighting panic. My motions reach breaking
point and I begin to sob out loud

213
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and curse. Soon I become hyper
aware that I cannot breathe in fully because

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the tunnel is compressing my ribs.
There's no budge in the stone. It

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00:21:21,720 --> 00:21:27,039
is so unyielding. Every breath is
limited, and so they start to come

216
00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:33,119
faster and faster in a desperate bid
to chase away the ever growing sense of

217
00:21:33,119 --> 00:21:41,960
suffocation. I just want one deep
breath, one deep breath, but I

218
00:21:41,039 --> 00:21:47,319
can't. The more I struggle,
the more desperate the need for oxygen becomes.

219
00:21:48,359 --> 00:21:52,279
I am trapped in a downward spiral
that feels like it is killing me.

220
00:21:52,759 --> 00:21:59,079
This is the worst case scenario.
I realize I was better off drowning.

221
00:22:00,119 --> 00:22:04,480
Nothing can possibly be worse than this. I want to pass out,

222
00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:11,119
I want to die. Neither happens. The world goes a bit woozy.

223
00:22:11,960 --> 00:22:21,240
I'm overcome briefly by dizziness, but
there's no changing this. Instead, I

224
00:22:21,240 --> 00:22:26,000
am forced to face my fear,
and while I cannot beat it, I

225
00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:30,559
can at least observe it. I
don't really have much of a choice.

226
00:22:30,839 --> 00:22:37,839
Neither the cave nor I are going
anywhere, so I pay attention to the

227
00:22:37,920 --> 00:22:41,599
lightheadedness, the pain in my chest, the weight of the earth above and

228
00:22:41,720 --> 00:22:47,880
below me. My heart races so
quickly, it feels like it might just

229
00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:53,160
seize up and stop. I focus
on its rhythm. I count each beat

230
00:22:53,319 --> 00:23:00,960
in the tattoo slowly without meaning to. This heightened awareness causes some of the

231
00:23:02,039 --> 00:23:07,480
panic to ease up. I can
describe it only is a sort of out

232
00:23:07,480 --> 00:23:12,559
of body experience, except I never
leave my body. I'm inside it,

233
00:23:14,400 --> 00:23:22,839
painfully, aware of every constraint and
bondage and every ache and pain. At

234
00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:27,920
last, I notice something new.
If I breathe out, the rock is

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00:23:27,960 --> 00:23:33,720
no longer squeezing me to death.
If I exhale and keep the air out,

236
00:23:33,319 --> 00:23:40,640
the feeling of constraint becomes almost tolerable. It is the only physical sensation

237
00:23:40,720 --> 00:23:45,519
of relief I have felt since this
began. And just like that, I'm

238
00:23:45,599 --> 00:23:52,440
back in the driver's seat. It
is so obvious in hindsight. I want

239
00:23:52,440 --> 00:23:56,079
to laugh. I exhale and keep
the air out of my lungs and wiggle

240
00:23:56,119 --> 00:24:03,200
my foot. My body moves.
I dried again, and this time I

241
00:24:03,440 --> 00:24:10,440
inch forward. I do it maybe
fifty a hundred times. All in all,

242
00:24:10,839 --> 00:24:15,400
I travel a meter, I think, and then the rock gives way.

243
00:24:18,119 --> 00:24:23,720
I wee plug a baby. I
can breathe a full breath, and

244
00:24:23,839 --> 00:24:29,839
the tunnel keeps widening. Before I
know it, I have my arms back

245
00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:33,880
at my side, and I'm using
my elbows to drag myself forward. Soon

246
00:24:34,079 --> 00:24:38,440
there is no tunnel scraping my shoulder
blades at all, no rock to bang

247
00:24:38,519 --> 00:24:45,160
my head against. I merge head
first and drag myself out of the tunnel

248
00:24:45,440 --> 00:24:49,680
and drop a few feet onto a
rocky floor below. I roll onto my

249
00:24:49,720 --> 00:24:56,799
back and let rip a laughter.
It is howling and mad and like nothing

250
00:24:56,839 --> 00:25:02,079
I've known before, weeping without a
joy. I looked to my left and

251
00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:10,240
right, ready for the next step
in this nightmare. There is a man

252
00:25:10,720 --> 00:25:17,240
smiling at me. Geez, I
squeal, scrambling upwards and away without meaning

253
00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:21,720
to. I kick him in the
face, and his head loves backwards like

254
00:25:21,839 --> 00:25:26,000
he's trying to laugh. I see
his mouth in a bloody ruin. His

255
00:25:26,160 --> 00:25:33,039
eyes and teeth are gone. He
isn't smiling at all. He's dead.

256
00:25:33,519 --> 00:25:40,839
Something has torn his jaws open and
removed his teeth. The result merely looks

257
00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:47,119
like a joker esque grin. Terrified, I shuffled over and briefly flick a

258
00:25:47,200 --> 00:25:52,440
hand out to touch him a quick
shove to the shoulder. He does not

259
00:25:52,599 --> 00:25:59,440
react. It takes another three or
four pokes before I finally convince myself he's

260
00:25:59,480 --> 00:26:07,440
a nerd. Reality asserts itself with
a kind of nun dread. This really

261
00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:11,839
is a dead body, I tell
myself. His face is pale in the

262
00:26:11,880 --> 00:26:17,599
glare of my torch, but a
quick hand to the forehead tells me is

263
00:26:17,599 --> 00:26:23,279
still warm, and that windbreaker is
awfully familiar. I rack my mind and

264
00:26:23,400 --> 00:26:30,440
summon an image of that old man
on the beach. He'd been wearing a

265
00:26:30,559 --> 00:26:36,279
jacket much like this one. But
it can't be him. I decide it

266
00:26:36,400 --> 00:26:42,160
simply cannot be him. This place
is a nightmare, I think, a

267
00:26:42,319 --> 00:26:48,359
real life underworld. I look around
and try to imagine how this body came

268
00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:55,279
to be here. There are strange
things bundled against the far wall. I

269
00:26:55,359 --> 00:26:59,960
approach and go through them, but
their effect is similar to the gold coin.

270
00:27:00,599 --> 00:27:07,279
My thoughts become frozen and sluggish.
I inventory them like some idiot,

271
00:27:07,640 --> 00:27:14,279
unable and unwilling to see the bigger
picture. Six coats, fifteen shoes,

272
00:27:14,759 --> 00:27:19,240
countless hats and gloves, all of
them torn or ripped in some fashion.

273
00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:26,039
Three backpacks, exercise books from a
school paper turned a much long ago,

274
00:27:27,160 --> 00:27:33,759
A pencil case stuffed with soft pencils
and broken pens. I dropped the last

275
00:27:33,799 --> 00:27:38,160
item to the floor and swivel my
light across the room behind me. I

276
00:27:38,200 --> 00:27:45,599
don't like this. My mind raises
with possibilities. Suddenly, I'm scanning this

277
00:27:45,720 --> 00:27:52,279
small chamber like my life depends on
it, desperate to answer a question that

278
00:27:52,440 --> 00:27:59,039
supplants all others. Maybe I should
have listened to my caveman thoughts. I

279
00:27:59,079 --> 00:28:12,519
think I may not be alone down
here. There is writing on the wall.

280
00:28:14,880 --> 00:28:21,000
I cannot recognize the language, but
it frightens me. Paragraphs of it

281
00:28:21,119 --> 00:28:26,079
scrawled in neat blocks, one after
the other. Occasionally it is broken up

282
00:28:26,079 --> 00:28:32,920
with simple pictograms of ships and spear
wielding men. If it tells a story,

283
00:28:33,759 --> 00:28:37,799
I cannot make heads or tails of
it. Something about the scene is

284
00:28:37,799 --> 00:28:44,400
getting to me, nonetheless, the
body, the pile of forgotten things,

285
00:28:44,799 --> 00:28:51,880
an ancient language. I stop myself
sinking into another full blown panic by remembering

286
00:28:51,920 --> 00:28:57,200
that these are all irrelevant details.
I need to leave this place no matter

287
00:28:57,279 --> 00:29:03,559
what. There are several tunnels leading
out of this cavern, all much larger

288
00:29:03,599 --> 00:29:10,039
than the last one. I pick
one at random, Hopefully it is more

289
00:29:10,079 --> 00:29:15,319
reliable than the last. I crawled
through, fighting the pain. I rise

290
00:29:15,400 --> 00:29:19,200
on to my knees and hands.
It hurts like hell, but it lets

291
00:29:19,240 --> 00:29:26,880
me leave swiftly and quietly. I
scamper along, offering only one last sad

292
00:29:26,960 --> 00:29:32,519
glimpse of the body. The old
man is looking at me. He is

293
00:29:32,559 --> 00:29:37,160
still grinning, and I am glad
to take the light away and put distance

294
00:29:37,319 --> 00:29:44,279
between us. Whether or not this
path leads out, I appreciate that it

295
00:29:44,279 --> 00:29:48,160
at least stays wide open. At
points. It is even large enough for

296
00:29:48,240 --> 00:29:53,400
two or three people to walk abreast. I've never been thankful of this kind

297
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:57,480
of room. Before, just the
day ago, this would have felt like

298
00:29:57,519 --> 00:30:04,839
a crowded elevator. Now it's like
an empty stadium. It lets me stop

299
00:30:04,880 --> 00:30:11,519
and catch my breath, lets me
raise ahead and make progress. Either can

300
00:30:11,559 --> 00:30:17,559
happen on my terms. Minutes slide
away in the dark. My time has

301
00:30:17,559 --> 00:30:22,960
no meaning for long periods. I
turn the torch off and navigate by sound

302
00:30:22,000 --> 00:30:26,359
and touch, relying on my echoes
to tell me when the tunnel takes a

303
00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:32,200
sudden change in direction. This is
something that if you had asked me this

304
00:30:32,279 --> 00:30:37,160
morning, I would have told you
I could never imagine. But it is

305
00:30:37,160 --> 00:30:42,799
surprisingly easy. More than once I
did. Take the change in what is

306
00:30:42,839 --> 00:30:49,559
otherwise uniform soundscape and stop lighting up
my torch and seeing a sharp bend right

307
00:30:49,640 --> 00:30:56,240
or left. I am acquiring a
competency that gives rise to a flickering hope.

308
00:30:59,119 --> 00:31:06,079
This confidence fades when I come to
a fork in the tunnel. For

309
00:31:06,119 --> 00:31:12,200
a moment, I'm caught by indecision. But then something familiar catches my eyes.

310
00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:21,279
There is a gold coin, another
pristine, just like the one on

311
00:31:21,319 --> 00:31:27,240
the beach. This time it does
not exhilarate me. No images of sunken

312
00:31:27,319 --> 00:31:33,480
chests come to mind, only the
leering grin of the palate corpse I left

313
00:31:33,519 --> 00:31:38,640
behind, and the grim words etched
into stone. The world is heavy,

314
00:31:40,160 --> 00:31:44,759
weighing down from above, and I
am so small and alone down here,

315
00:31:45,119 --> 00:31:51,920
the darkness so complete as to suffocate. I stare at the coin, and

316
00:31:52,000 --> 00:31:56,400
it's positioning in a tunnel that takes
a hard left turn out of sight.

317
00:31:57,039 --> 00:32:04,279
I don't like it. I don't
like its placement. Taking it would place

318
00:32:04,319 --> 00:32:08,680
me right at the threshold of the
unseen. I'm certain of nothing in this

319
00:32:08,839 --> 00:32:15,319
underworld, possessing only the risk averse
instincts of a prey animal. But I

320
00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:23,680
decide that coin is a trap based
only on those instincts. It is almost

321
00:32:23,839 --> 00:32:30,319
arrogant, unsubtle. I'm wide eyed, with a smell of blood still freshen

322
00:32:30,400 --> 00:32:37,160
my nose, A twitching hair ears
raised. I have a feeling that whatever

323
00:32:37,240 --> 00:32:43,440
set that trap is near enough to
hear my every breath. I am separated

324
00:32:43,480 --> 00:32:51,519
from death only by the gossamer thin
limits of my perception. It's right there,

325
00:32:52,759 --> 00:32:58,920
and it expects me to take the
bait. I realize, with some

326
00:32:59,160 --> 00:33:07,240
disappointment, I already have. I'm
two coins deep into this nightmare. This

327
00:33:07,279 --> 00:33:13,440
whole thing a carefully laid trap from
the start. My only hope is that

328
00:33:13,480 --> 00:33:19,759
I'm no Highland hair. I can
think beyond action and reaction, but I

329
00:33:19,880 --> 00:33:24,599
have to be quick. I weigh
up my options. If something is there,

330
00:33:25,400 --> 00:33:30,720
do I really want to let it
know I'm aware of it? I

331
00:33:30,759 --> 00:33:36,519
suppose every ambush, sooner or later, has to release itself. Better to

332
00:33:36,559 --> 00:33:42,359
be in control. I decide I
find a rock. There are plenty of

333
00:33:42,400 --> 00:33:49,079
them. Slowly, quietly, I
back away from the fork and find a

334
00:33:49,240 --> 00:33:53,400
ridge in the stone walls that I
can hide behind. It is small and

335
00:33:53,480 --> 00:34:00,400
offers little shelter, but it's the
best I have and I hope it work

336
00:34:00,519 --> 00:34:06,440
anyway. I thumbed the switch,
and my light goes out. I throw

337
00:34:06,480 --> 00:34:12,480
the stone in my fist and squeeze
myself back into my hiding space and hold

338
00:34:12,599 --> 00:34:17,480
my breath just in time. The
stone smashes into the wall of the right

339
00:34:17,519 --> 00:34:24,320
hand tunnel. This is the one
without the coin. There is silence for

340
00:34:24,440 --> 00:34:31,880
what might be five ten seconds,
and then there is only the gentlest of

341
00:34:32,039 --> 00:34:38,719
sounds, the touch of something soft
against the stone. What a far cry

342
00:34:38,760 --> 00:34:45,159
from the synthetic world of engines and
buzzing motors I'm used to. I have

343
00:34:45,280 --> 00:34:51,800
spent my life training myself to ignore
those kinds of sounds, barely perceptible scuffles,

344
00:34:52,920 --> 00:34:58,519
a cat's footfall, a bird's wings, a scurrying rat. But down

345
00:34:58,559 --> 00:35:05,400
here the sounds like thunder. It
makes my blood run cold, and the

346
00:35:05,480 --> 00:35:09,400
hair and my scalps stand on edge. A part of me had thrown the

347
00:35:09,480 --> 00:35:16,719
stone, convinced I would only prove
myself wrong. But now the terror is

348
00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:22,880
so real that I can almost reach
out and touch it. It is as

349
00:35:22,880 --> 00:35:28,960
tangible as the wall I'm trying desperately
to dissolve into, as real as my

350
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:39,559
own flesh and blood, ay and
being hunted. Whatever was in hiding has

351
00:35:39,599 --> 00:35:45,159
seemingly taken the bait. The sound
of its movements disappears down the right hand

352
00:35:45,159 --> 00:35:52,840
tunnel. Thank God for that caveman. He remembers the plan. Acting on

353
00:35:53,039 --> 00:35:59,320
instinct and painfully aware of the ticking
clock, I forced myself to peek around

354
00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:05,719
the rocky outcrop and turn on my
torch. There lies the fork again.

355
00:36:06,760 --> 00:36:10,920
And if I had any doubt about
the trap before, it is thoroughly beaten

356
00:36:12,000 --> 00:36:19,559
down. When I see the gold
coin has disappeared, I waste no more

357
00:36:19,559 --> 00:36:24,440
time and scramble on all fours down
that turning, pausing only briefly to consider

358
00:36:24,760 --> 00:36:30,440
if my hunter has employed a double
bluff. Oh well, I think it's

359
00:36:30,480 --> 00:36:37,760
too late. Now around the corner, I go and find nothing but darkness.

360
00:36:38,159 --> 00:36:44,639
I could try and perform some mental
gymnastics convince myself there was never anything

361
00:36:44,679 --> 00:36:49,519
there in the first place. But
on one of the walls I spot a

362
00:36:49,559 --> 00:36:54,679
streak of something reddish brown. There
was just enough time in passing to be

363
00:36:54,840 --> 00:37:02,519
sure that it is blood, and
then I'm gone, desperately crawling further into

364
00:37:02,639 --> 00:37:10,960
darkness. Occasionally I stop and check
over my shoulder for signs of something giving

365
00:37:12,079 --> 00:37:16,400
chase. If it took the bait
and followed the wrong tunnel, who's to

366
00:37:16,480 --> 00:37:22,480
say it didn't quickly realize and is
now barreling down on me. Although the

367
00:37:22,559 --> 00:37:28,360
tunnels don't intersect down the line,
if something lives here, it must be

368
00:37:28,400 --> 00:37:34,760
incredibly familiar with a layout of these
sprawling caverns. I am merely a tourist

369
00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:39,760
in the shadows, hopelessly lost and
ill equipped for this kind of survivalist nightmare.

370
00:37:42,400 --> 00:37:47,039
But each time I look, there
is only empty space, a frighteningly

371
00:37:47,199 --> 00:37:53,320
sterile landscape, brutal and haunting looming
over me and my hands and knees.

372
00:37:54,840 --> 00:38:01,360
Rock walls curved and jagged, ribbed
and rippling, a concrete colon where light

373
00:38:01,519 --> 00:38:07,960
can only reach so far. Each
time I look, I have to force

374
00:38:07,039 --> 00:38:15,400
myself to break eye contact with the
darkness and resume my journey. I do

375
00:38:15,480 --> 00:38:20,440
this sixteen times. I do not
know how long a lapse is between each

376
00:38:20,480 --> 00:38:27,239
glance. I only count the number, until at last, the everlasting tunnel

377
00:38:27,280 --> 00:38:34,480
takes a break and I am deposited
and yet another cavernous room. This time

378
00:38:34,960 --> 00:38:39,039
I am almost blinded by the light
it emanates. For a moment I turn

379
00:38:39,119 --> 00:38:45,519
my head upwards, expecting to see
a bulb. Instead, there is a

380
00:38:45,559 --> 00:38:50,360
hole in the roof, and only
the faintest glimmer of sunlight makes its way

381
00:38:50,400 --> 00:38:55,679
down. But after hours in pitch
black darkness, it felt like staring right

382
00:38:55,920 --> 00:39:02,199
at the sun. It is too
far to see the way out, or

383
00:39:02,280 --> 00:39:07,800
to get any real hint of the
sky beyond. I can't say if it's

384
00:39:07,920 --> 00:39:12,960
night or day up there, but
I know the sky must be close,

385
00:39:14,199 --> 00:39:20,400
so close the hole itself isn't far
above me. And use my light,

386
00:39:20,880 --> 00:39:25,679
I can spot a kind of ancient
rusted ladder embedded in the rock. It

387
00:39:25,760 --> 00:39:31,800
won't be easy climbing it so injured, but given my limited choices, I'll

388
00:39:31,840 --> 00:39:37,280
have to manage. For the first
time in hours, I stander. My

389
00:39:37,360 --> 00:39:45,679
two feet reaching upwards hurt everything from
my chest to my toes. Broken ribs

390
00:39:45,719 --> 00:39:52,679
grind, A swollen angle pulses pain
through deaden nerves that seconds ago reported nothing

391
00:39:52,920 --> 00:39:59,000
but hissing static. I swear it
is so bad my heart stops, or

392
00:39:59,000 --> 00:40:04,119
at the very least it missus a
beat. This must be the kind of

393
00:40:04,199 --> 00:40:09,360
stress that can kill healthy men,
and I'm not even healthy. My elbow

394
00:40:09,480 --> 00:40:15,719
doesn't even get past my shoulder when
I'm forced to gasp for breath and the

395
00:40:15,719 --> 00:40:22,039
whole house of cards comes tumbling down. I fall back, and even that

396
00:40:22,199 --> 00:40:29,159
hurts more than I can imagine.
Suddenly I find myself questioning if I really

397
00:40:29,280 --> 00:40:40,960
haven't in me to climb that pitted, rusty ladder. Something screams it isn't

398
00:40:42,000 --> 00:40:46,360
far away. This room, like
the others before, has many ways in

399
00:40:46,480 --> 00:40:52,239
and out. It is rising on
the walls too, picked the grams of

400
00:40:52,320 --> 00:40:57,599
something strange with a head of angler
being worshiped by men the size of ants.

401
00:40:58,800 --> 00:41:04,239
My torch flashes crossed them all and
makes nightmares of the shadows, but

402
00:41:04,480 --> 00:41:09,519
nothing yet leaps out at me.
I realized, this is it the only

403
00:41:09,599 --> 00:41:15,840
chance I'm getting. How many chances
do I need, I asked myself,

404
00:41:16,320 --> 00:41:23,400
Only one, I mutter. I
force myself upright, and before my nerves

405
00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:28,920
have time to register the landslide of
pain ready to collapse me. I hop

406
00:41:28,920 --> 00:41:32,039
on one foot. It is all
I need to reach the ladder with one

407
00:41:32,119 --> 00:41:37,559
swinging arm, then the other,
so that I'm there, clinging on for

408
00:41:37,679 --> 00:41:44,000
dear life, feet barely an inch
of the floor, with tears streaming down

409
00:41:44,000 --> 00:41:50,199
my face. This already feels like
too much, but before I have time

410
00:41:50,239 --> 00:41:55,199
to give up and fold into myself, there comes another scream. This one

411
00:41:55,440 --> 00:42:00,079
is so close. I cannot help
but imagine that whatever lies in the dark

412
00:42:00,800 --> 00:42:07,760
is excited to finally catch up with
me. That last thought tempts fate.

413
00:42:07,960 --> 00:42:14,360
It seems still swinging eyes darting to
and fro from the several tunnel holes,

414
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:21,239
I catch a glimpse of something.
It is racing towards me. It is

415
00:42:21,320 --> 00:42:25,840
human, vaguely in the way that
the monsters in our nightmares often are.

416
00:42:28,400 --> 00:42:32,400
I laid out my own scream or
something like it. It's just the cartos

417
00:42:32,440 --> 00:42:37,039
sort of yelp, because whether I
realize it or not, my muscles have

418
00:42:37,159 --> 00:42:43,920
kicked into gear and I'm somehow doing
a pull up, my legs kicking furiously.

419
00:42:44,320 --> 00:42:47,679
I drag my way up until the
first rung is at chest height and

420
00:42:47,800 --> 00:42:53,079
I'm able to grab another overhead.
The pain in my chest retreats to a

421
00:42:53,159 --> 00:42:59,199
dull throb. I try foolishly to
use my bad ankle to climb, and

422
00:42:59,360 --> 00:43:02,559
realize there aren't enough endorphins in the
world to let me put weight on a

423
00:43:02,599 --> 00:43:08,760
broken bone. I let out another
cry and switch tactics. I have to

424
00:43:08,840 --> 00:43:14,920
use my arms to lift myself and
rely on one good foot as a stabilizer.

425
00:43:15,199 --> 00:43:21,039
This would be difficult but manageable if
I had all the time in the

426
00:43:21,079 --> 00:43:25,400
world. But with the memory of
that thing bearing down on me, it

427
00:43:25,599 --> 00:43:31,760
is akin to torture. I am
flooded with a sense of futility, of

428
00:43:31,920 --> 00:43:38,239
pain and needless suffering. But if
I've learned anything in the last few hours,

429
00:43:39,039 --> 00:43:44,920
it is that the human body runs
on its own firmware, and it

430
00:43:45,039 --> 00:43:51,039
isn't slaved to your brain. My
arms move their own accord. My body

431
00:43:51,159 --> 00:43:55,840
rises one rung at a time,
too fast for common sense injuries, a

432
00:43:55,880 --> 00:44:01,440
bound, grazed skin, a bumpt
head, Each step up as me clumsily

433
00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:07,800
bashing or banging some sensitive part of
me into the barely visible rocks. Instinct

434
00:44:07,920 --> 00:44:12,559
may be in the driver's seat,
but it's happy to leave me with the

435
00:44:12,559 --> 00:44:20,400
consequences of its recklessness. I feel
every ache and pain, every stinging wound

436
00:44:20,559 --> 00:44:28,880
embedded with grit, every ligament stretched
to breaking point. Oddly, I don't

437
00:44:28,920 --> 00:44:32,880
mind this arrangement. I want to
live. I am glad there is a

438
00:44:32,920 --> 00:44:38,280
caveman inside me to take care of
moments like this, especially when I glanced

439
00:44:38,280 --> 00:44:44,519
down between my legs and see pitch
black eyes glaring up at me with thoughtless

440
00:44:44,519 --> 00:44:51,760
glee. I cannot get over how
human that face is. I expected something

441
00:44:51,800 --> 00:44:58,039
insectile, maybe even a rachneid.
Whatever is below me, whether it's some

442
00:44:58,239 --> 00:45:05,039
hybrid or mutant, it is vile
and fast approaching. The vibrating in the

443
00:45:05,079 --> 00:45:09,159
ladder tells me it is climbing too. I try to climb faster, but

444
00:45:09,280 --> 00:45:15,760
I really am operating on all cylinders
right now. There's nothing left to spare.

445
00:45:16,039 --> 00:45:20,679
I don't want to, but I
look down again, and there it

446
00:45:20,800 --> 00:45:28,880
is even closer. It is smiling
with a rubbering mouth full of glassy teeth.

447
00:45:30,039 --> 00:45:35,719
I hate it. I lash out
with my bad foot without meaning to,

448
00:45:36,079 --> 00:45:39,679
and hurt only myself. The pain
is so severe I am forced to

449
00:45:39,719 --> 00:45:46,360
stop climbing and sob. And it
is in that moment I feel claws sink

450
00:45:46,679 --> 00:45:52,119
into the hot, swollen flesh of
my calf. I let out a hell

451
00:45:52,159 --> 00:45:57,960
of a noise. It empties my
lungs and burns a mark deep into my

452
00:45:58,039 --> 00:46:04,159
being. WILL remember the way this
scream feels until the day I die.

453
00:46:06,559 --> 00:46:09,960
It is the moment in time where
I give into despair, where I lose

454
00:46:10,000 --> 00:46:15,119
all hope as my nervous system gives
into a pain in juice seizure that sees

455
00:46:15,159 --> 00:46:21,920
my fingers go numb and my limbs
go limp. The last thing I remember

456
00:46:22,000 --> 00:46:28,639
as I fall is the sight of
an iron grate overhead, only ten twenty

457
00:46:28,719 --> 00:46:34,559
meters away. A man I think
is standing there and shining a torch straight

458
00:46:34,599 --> 00:46:39,679
down. He says something I cannot
hear. I tell myself this is a

459
00:46:39,760 --> 00:46:46,840
hallucination, nothing more. I enter
free fall. My head HiT's a rocky

460
00:46:46,840 --> 00:46:58,800
outcrop beneath me. Something crunches darkness. I come to in a hospital bed

461
00:46:59,559 --> 00:47:04,639
with a feeling in my chest that
makes me think of war. A lash

462
00:47:04,880 --> 00:47:07,679
left or right. Grab a hold
of a table and jerk it across the

463
00:47:07,719 --> 00:47:13,360
floor, ready to wield it like
a club. The nurse in the corner

464
00:47:13,480 --> 00:47:17,239
is afraid. She doesn't realize it. But I'm fighting for my life,

465
00:47:19,280 --> 00:47:24,119
or at least I think I am. Slowly, I blink the halogen glare

466
00:47:24,239 --> 00:47:31,320
away and take in my surroundings.
The battleground fades. I realize where I

467
00:47:31,320 --> 00:47:38,559
am. I try to hold back
tears. It doesn't work. Within seconds,

468
00:47:38,800 --> 00:47:45,199
I am balling. Arms embrace me. I don't know who they are,

469
00:47:45,519 --> 00:47:50,760
and I don't care. I embrace
them back, I seize them and

470
00:47:50,920 --> 00:47:55,159
cling unto their unfamiliar body with such
severity. They mutter words, there's someone

471
00:47:55,239 --> 00:48:04,880
nearby along the effects of Jesus hurting
me more rust, movement, a needle.

472
00:48:05,960 --> 00:48:13,360
I'm asleep again. Hours maybe days
later, I awakened to find my

473
00:48:13,400 --> 00:48:19,360
mother and a policeman nearby. This
time, my senses return in time to

474
00:48:19,360 --> 00:48:29,719
stop panic. I'm finally given the
story of my rescue. They were looking

475
00:48:29,800 --> 00:48:34,800
for me the entire time, and
by chance they heard me near the old

476
00:48:34,840 --> 00:48:38,880
storm drain. They came rattling down
no more than a few minutes after I

477
00:48:38,960 --> 00:48:45,400
hit the ground, and found me
lying there, bleeding and broken. Strangely,

478
00:48:45,519 --> 00:48:51,559
they say I had no real injuries
from the fall itself, a bumped

479
00:48:51,559 --> 00:48:55,079
head and a broken wrist on the
way down. But from that height I

480
00:48:55,079 --> 00:49:00,960
should have broken my neck. Something
cushing my fall, I think and laugh

481
00:49:01,199 --> 00:49:09,159
uproariously. My mother looks worried.
She must think of gone insane. Who

482
00:49:09,199 --> 00:49:15,000
can blame her? I was down
there for over twenty four hours, although

483
00:49:15,159 --> 00:49:20,960
it didn't seem like it to me. I explain this to them. The

484
00:49:21,000 --> 00:49:27,239
elasticity of time in the dark,
and they nod like they understand, but

485
00:49:27,360 --> 00:49:35,280
of course they don't. Somehow,
it takes me another hour to realize I'm

486
00:49:35,320 --> 00:49:42,960
missing a leg. This perplexes them
as much as me, indiscrepances in the

487
00:49:43,079 --> 00:49:47,599
nature of the wound. An expert
stands to the side and explains as much

488
00:49:47,639 --> 00:49:53,800
to me. The words are a
distant drone. I'm taken aback by the

489
00:49:53,880 --> 00:50:00,239
sight of the stump, all neatly
bandaged. Apparently it took a lot of

490
00:50:00,239 --> 00:50:08,360
surgery to neat an up. Despite
everything, I am angry. I thought

491
00:50:08,440 --> 00:50:13,639
I was dead. There should be
a small price to pay, and yet

492
00:50:13,639 --> 00:50:17,239
the knowledge that a part of me
went to feeding that monster makes my stomach

493
00:50:17,400 --> 00:50:22,559
churn. I want to be sick. A piece of me is down there

494
00:50:22,599 --> 00:50:30,039
somewhere, dissolving in stomach acid,
waiting to be excreted in some foated corner

495
00:50:30,159 --> 00:50:36,159
of the monster's lair. When I
start to cry and shout in impotent rage,

496
00:50:36,960 --> 00:50:42,199
they have to sedate me once more. They assume it is simple shock,

497
00:50:43,320 --> 00:50:46,880
But there is more to it than
that. I am consumed by a

498
00:50:47,000 --> 00:50:57,840
deep hatred that is hard to explain. Months later, I find myself recounting

499
00:50:57,880 --> 00:51:04,880
this story to try and that hateful
feeling. All this time, I cannot

500
00:51:05,039 --> 00:51:09,840
escape the sense of unfinished business.
Every time I mess up with my prosthetic

501
00:51:10,440 --> 00:51:17,199
slip stumble, momentarily forget it is
there. I feel the anger burning inside

502
00:51:17,199 --> 00:51:23,639
me. Every night I spend hours
in agony from phantom pains, trying to

503
00:51:23,719 --> 00:51:30,840
soothe a wounded brain using a mirror
of all things. Sometimes I think I

504
00:51:30,880 --> 00:51:37,599
would have rather died if it meant
killing that thing all my weight such a

505
00:51:37,719 --> 00:51:43,559
steep drop. I picture myself crushing
it and leaving it a gory, broken

506
00:51:43,639 --> 00:51:52,480
mess. I've never felt this kind
of enmity. Evidently I'm not alone.

507
00:51:54,400 --> 00:52:00,960
One morning, a knock on the
caravan door. It takes me far too

508
00:52:00,000 --> 00:52:05,880
long to get ready. I'm not
yet practiced with a limb. Putting it

509
00:52:05,960 --> 00:52:12,239
on taking it off takes me nearly
twenty minutes to get myself together. My

510
00:52:12,280 --> 00:52:15,920
mood is darkened since my rescue,
and I practically kick my door open with

511
00:52:16,000 --> 00:52:24,880
a raw ready to curse out anyone
who disturbs me. I find no one

512
00:52:24,960 --> 00:52:32,280
there, only silence and another gold
coin
