Wow, you're black out here. Black ar raar raar and word rar ra
crazy Sorry, Ray, Hey, look me a little bit of a delay
that, like whatever, we could work with it. Yeah whatever, bub
yeah whatever. He just out who is Look. I love the idea of
Wolverine just being extremely racist for no reason, Like he's just fighting like he
wouldn't. I thought he wouldn't be. I feel like he would just because
of how he looks outside of his costume. He just looks like a racist
lumberjack. He just looks I don't like. Look. That may be true
in a sense, but I can't imagine someone that old, that has lived
that many lives that's done as much motion as he is hating someone because of
the way they look. He's just like, I don't care anymore. Man.
Plus, he's fucked a lot of black pussy. You know, he's
had his fair I just feel like he has cognitive dissonance where he likes black
women. But then like for some reason, every time he's black, man
Bishop or something, he just always has to say something racist. It doesn't
even matter. Bishop wasn't even like in his he wasn't even facing his direction,
and he's just like he just gotta like hit Scott. We have freaking
spook over there. What's going on with them? What does it mean?
Mama? You guys that that Wolverine has always been cast? Does it bother
you that like that? He Jackman is like the iconic Wolverine and he's just
not like he's like six foot seven to wolver When I so when I was
when I was little, right, I didn't understan because you don't understand how
short Wolverine is. When you're small. You don't get it. No,
I told you, really doesn't because he's bigger than you. You don't get
it. You don't get it. What are you talking about? So I
watched everyone. No, No, you're right right, he's tiny. Wolverine's
like five foot five. Maybe maybe I think he's five three. Actually maybe
he probably is, andy because you never I never really understood. I was
like, oh, Hugh Jackman's him. That's fine. Wolver he's a foot
he's a foot taller than Wolverine is. Yeah, five three is what we
got as far as an official you know, it's still Google real fast,
but uh it's it's when I saw X one. I saw X one and
I'm like, all right, Hugh Jackman is literally the opposite. He's tall
and just in moderate shape. Like if you saw the first one where Wolverine
is just hulking with muscle and tiny, and I'm like, I hate this.
I was, I was so against it. But then when I saw
the movie as a kid, you know, I still I still enjoyed it.
I enjoyed the funk out of it because it was always had five fucking
three, dude, these five three and ways before this, before before I
had themantium. He was one hundred and ninety five pounds at five to three.
That muscle muscle sling that is crazy, so wide, man. I
mean he does have extra bone, you know, some heavy ass extra bone
in his in his arms. That's that's not extra bones, right, Bones
aren't that heavy, dude. Bones are pretty dense. I mean your skeleton
bones are pretty helet takes up a significant amount of your weight in your body.
Yes, there, he has three more bone claws in his hands that
are like what eighty five pounds a piece? My bad, you said one
hundred and ninety pounds, dickhead. I mean, like maybe Patty, He's
just a lot of muscle. He's a ton of fucking of muscle. But
I'm just trying to be fair and say there's a little reality. Okay,
I'm not going to do that. Reality. The reality is that your bones
are very heavy. If you are, I'm like, right now, I'm
one hundred and twenty. I lost a lot of weights. I'm one hundred
and twenty pounds right which means my skeleton's about one hundred of those I think
I would imagine. And so there's like twenty pounds left for like the organs
and the pounds of flesh. No, no, no, no, no
heavy spine, dude, It's it's like maybe twenty it's like ten pounds of
flesh, uh, five pounds of organs, one pound of blood and and
the rest of it is come. So like that's that's the make that's the
makeup of the human body. Generally. The amount of resting come I have
in my body anytime is out resting. What happens if you if you do
if you if you don't come for an entire year, do you think like
you just your your bones become come to like find places for the com to
go, Like you know, it's just like you know, like it needs
storage. It just too much become come. You just have one visibly swollen
part of your lower body, Like, what's that my cum tank? I
haven't came in a year, tank. I think you get paler. I
think that's what happens because I think the cum seeps into your skin and whitens
it. I think, uh, I think you do get heavier. Yeah
that is true, but yeah, I don't know. What I think is
what happens is you don't go one year without coming, or you go you're
not coming. You'll happen is you'll fall very ill a month eleven right,
and you'll be very sick and you're on a ViRGE of death. But once
you make a full five days, the cumb will go from in your little
cum spot to coding your muscles, enhancing your muscles and your skeletons future,
giving you way more power. Once you're beyond the year of no com you're
at your strongest. What do you basically might get cancer? Though you might
get cancer though I believe it on all the internet forums, you know,
like that the internet forums always talking about how good it is for you to
I had a nurse. I had a nurse, A friend of mine that
became a nurse actually practicing that, you know, not to obviously for a
year, but it's some ridiculous amount of time that you know, when you
bust, you lose power, because that's like a real thing that people believe
that the the come inside you hold a significant amount of power. And the
weakest men are busting all the time. And I'm not, yeah, weakest
man pathetic. Yeah, so when you see people that are just like so
like and and they just not and mentally weak as well, not just physically,
just people who are just of course yeah right, so they're busting non
stop, no mental fortitude at all. Yeah, they don't leave a you
know, it's the it's the type of when they bust, their nothing.
I've never gotten to the point. Maybe one time, one night actually where
I've busted so many times, nothing came out, and that's when I knew
it's time to stop. But that's like the average definitely didn't. I definitely
didn't. Definitely was like that's something wrong, let me try going. It
kept going, and then eventually eventually it was like it just it just hurt.
It just hurt. It looked it looked it looked like if somebody put
looked like somebody cut up a frank freighter and then put it outside, and
it was just I was like, maybe, all right, welcome to the
podcast. Welcome to start podcast. It's uh, it is us, We're
here. I don't know why we seem to be introducing every show with come
speak lately, but it is what it is. Come oriented conversation is a
good time whatever, but it's my come conversation. So look, I don't
know how much I don't know how much there is to talk about. There
is that crazy there. There is that guy right who who did was trying
to uh, you're trying to become cinder from from killer in right right exactly.
So so let's let's just get out of the way. A guy protested,
uh, the Israel palasign conflict. Uh he burned, he burned himself
outside of the fucking what is it that the Israeli embassy something like an American
embassy and Israel or something that that one? That one, right, And
he was like, I want to be saying so badly is the best character,
but like people don't mean him right, Yeah, And for some reason
people think it's about some people think it's about Israel palsign, but he clearly
said in the video, like this is Cinder. I'm trying to be Cinder.
That's what he was screaming. I want to be blazed. I want
to be blazing combat. People want to bor comment armor, get it so
much. The one of the worst ones, my mind, you one of
the worst Modal Kombat games by far. Mind. Of course, it's yeah,
he's bad that everyone hated it. Did did you guys? So?
Did you guys see the did you guys see the footage? I didn't want
I'm not I'm not that person. I'm not that type of person. You
can tell me like I and describe it to me. I don't need to
see it afterwards. I don't need to see a person burned to death.
I right, I mean I was. I was curious purely because I don't
know. There's something about fire that is like strangely, like it's different than
like someone getting no no. I think I think it's just because like seeing
somebody burned to death is different than seeing somebody like I don't know, cut
to shreds by like a I don't know, there's something like disconnecting about it
because it's like it's almost like a filter over them, so I was like,
oh, whatever, I could probably see me. I was curious about
it. Oh really, my brain knows that. My brain knows just knowing
how is it just really? It was undoubtedly it's it's probably like insanely painful.
But to me, I think about if it could be on the cover
of an album, it's probably not, you know whatever, Like I get
what you're saying. I get it, I get it, you know what
I mean? It makes a very insane way, and it was It was
kind of frustrating because I was like trying to fast, like what is this
footage? This footage sounds insane, and I was looking for and every news
report was like, we're not going to show you because it's very disturbing,
and it's like, motherfucker you you wheeled nine to eleven into my classroom and
made me watch it, like for years you did this shuttle blowing up twenty
ten. Yeah, I wonder why I watched that in high school. I
was in the middle of lab class watching man. I was like, hey,
yo, I saw people blow up a lot. Yeah, right,
But like, also, to be fair, that is kind of implied violence
in a way that you couldn't actually see the bodies right, catch on fire,
right. But what I not what I think what I think makes this
worse though, is that the whole point was that like he's protesting, right,
like he wants people to see it. Right. It's not like it's
not like an accident where it's like, oh, whoa an accident, let's
record this accident from like really far away and like like really cap. I
was like, no, this dude wanted this to be out there, clearly.
That was like the whole point of it. It was like a protest.
So it's like, to me, it's like the news being like,
we're not gonna show it's kind of fucked up in my opinion, Well,
but oh go ahead, he done, cause that's the news. It's the
news we're supposed to. It's supposed to make us uncomfortable on some and some
level. But to me, look, there's not really much funny here in
my opinion, not much anyway. But like I will say, the funniest
thing about it is that if you do see the video, an officer,
an officer runs up to this man burning alive with his gun drawn. He
runs up to it and he's like, I don't know if he says like
don't move or anything. Out think he says anything, but he like runs
up to this burning man with his gun drawn. That's fucking funny, if
that is wild. If I remember correctly, he uh, he actually had
an interview. They're like, hey, why did you do that? And
he was like, well, the the gentleman said hey, look I'm an
acorn. And it frightened me. And so I was really trying. I
was. I wasn't sure if if if it was legitimately an egghorn, or
if he was pranking me, or if it was the human torch. I'm
not sure, but I was scared, right, and I thought that was
fair. I thought it was fair. Yeah, no, I see,
I see. I saw that vidence. I saw everybody. Everybody was making
fun of this guy. Everybody was like, oh, what an idiot.
He genuinely think like, what is he gonna do? Shoot the fire off
him? What a dumb ass? And I look at it. I looked
at it from like a different perspective. I think, I don't think this
guy is stupid. I think he's like a whimsical man. I think he
has a sense of childlike wonder that is still intact. That he sees a
man on fire and at least five percent of him thinks maybe this is an
X Men, like maybe this is maybe it's possible that this is like a
middle gear solid man on fire thing, and magic is indeed possible. Yeah,
that's what That's what I liked to. That's my that's that's my headcannon
for this guy personally. Yeah, I like that. There's There was another
interview he did though, because like you know, you know how they do.
They're like, oh, are you sure that's your final answer? Like
you know, they they they made a joke of it your final answer,
and then he was like, oh wait, you know what actually hold on?
Really what actually happened is so I was saving some Palestinian kids and I
had a super soaker, you know, I had a gun, was super
soaker. We were just shooting them and I was being a hero. And
then when that happened, when the human torch you know, did what did
his thing, I thought I still had my super soaker on me and I
was trying to put them out, and you know, unfortunately, actually there
was a real magazine with live rounds in it. So that was just an
honest mistake, and I think we should not judge them man for that.
I think that is an absolutely despicable thing. I think all of you people
that laughed at him, you're disgusting human beings, disgusting Simply he was simply
trying to help, if any After all, a man caked in gasoline and
little blaze, Obviously a super soaker is going to be enough to put that
guy out, clearly, obviously, clearly there's so much. There's so much.
What is there at least two cups of water in a supersed they were
did you do you guys remember the slime one? There was like there was
like a super soaker with like a slime component to it. Uh no,
I don't know. I don't know about that. I swear to God.
I swear to God on the slime super want though. It was like an
alien looking weapon. Yeah, the super soaker Oozinator. It was hard.
Yeah, like what, Water's fine, It'll dry and I'll be good.
Yeah. The slime was dude, it would this ship would like dry in
your hair and then it would be it would be in your hair for months.
It was a very poorly her hair thought out, crystal hair. I
don't I genuinely think it's the reason why my hair is no longer curly because
my hair, my hair used to be curly. It is not even close
to curly anymore. Your hair. Yeah, it was like my hair was
like it was like it was like, we have to retreat. So like,
I don't know. If you look it up, it's called the super
soaker uzinator O O Z I N A T O R, and you can
look at it. It's a cool looking weapon. It was dope. It
was like it looked like an alien, like a xenomorph head. It was
fucking sick as a kid. Anyway, it was like it was like,
this is a dope looking weapon, and then you shoot the slime and you're
like, oh, apparently that's what the agent at the border had. And
actually he really did another interview. It's like, well, actually keeps doing
these interviews. He won't shut the fuck up. He can't like making imagine
just like like not even sticking with your story to the point where you give
like five different interviews and it's like, why is he even like no one
believes him after the second one. It keeps coming back the next day.
Actually, actually that wasn't me. That was at the end that was not
me. That was but that's but yeah, that's like his ninth interview,
he's like, actually, I forgot, that's not even me. That's Oh,
it's understandable, sir, understandable. Yeah, what a crazy fucking thing.
Like who saw that coming though? Who saw that that was gonna be
something? Now? To be fair, obviously that guy was mentally disturbed.
But at the same time, from the I've read some of the stuff that
he posted online, he's a little extreme. He's a little extreme, but
at the same time, he was also very uh calculated in and in his
thoughts and what he thought about the region. And this is the part that
I saw because god damn it, I hate I hate the I hate that
people are citing this issue like there you know, you have to be with
us or against this thing. It's so fucking weird where it's like the idea
is to not have people die anymore, like let's talk. But then there's
people that like, say, he mentioned something like oh, this is you
know, this is a Israel's an apartheid state, blah blah blah, so
and so forth, and it's like he's not wrong about that. But the
one thing that he's kind of extreme about just like anything else, Like say,
unfortunately the United States, fucking Mexico, Brazil, anywhere you go,
colonizers took the fucking place over right. They they started slapping the people around
and they started shoving them with guns and shit like hey, you're gay,
get out. And so at this point, because of that default, does
that mean that the people that are here now should all fucking be eradicated?
Probably not, Probably not extreme. It's extreme. So that's kind of like
how peoples some people are all with Israel. They're like they're apart time and
they took over this region. They should all be gone. I'm like,
it's kind of crazy. Well they're here, they're here, they're there,
So yeah, it is like they're there. Yeah, I mean whatever,
Like to me, I look at this, Look it's it's crazy. It's
wild to set yourself on fire. But I gotta say, I don't know
man props in some way, because there's there's a lot of mentally deserved people
who will, like, look, there are people who go into schools and
shoot everybody and then kill themselves. There are people who just crawl into a
fucking cave and land upside down and die for no good reason. So like
ship on their heads. Yeah, So to me, what a face of
the of the ways of the ways for a mentally disturbed person to go out?
I think, you know you can't. This is probably one of the
better ones. You know. I'm not gonna say that I've of not hurting.
He didn't hurt people, and that's kind of a plus. I guess
he didn't hurt anybody. It's still really really really sad that he, you
know, tried to go Kyle ken and on himself. But like it's it's
unfortunate, but like it's I don't know, man, the situation is,
that situation is so wholeheartedly it's the Middle East. Man. It's nothing about
that place can be solved with a simple answer anymore. It's just such a
wild place where they think you came back to life, you know, like
it's just he gotta this letter is leave it by itself. Are The place
is such a it is such a confusing region that it doesn't even have a
clear it doesn't even have clear directions, like it's the it's the Middle and
the East. It's fucking crazy. Just it's it's just a it's a bad
it's a rough place now, because because what is that? Because what does
that even mean? Everything's east of something like, it's not even it is
the middle of the eastern most continent. Is it the easternmost if you're starting
from where though, because then it's not. It's the Middle East you start.
If you start from the Middle East, it's not the easternmost continent.
No. If you you know, because we have we have the abbot what
is it called, the advocates and the like that that shows where everything is
located. It's wildly wrong. What right you're telling you about? No,
the thing with the account the old calculators, okay, old County one.
Not right. We have Atlas, then Atlas is what you're looking like Gallas,
the ones that are completely like Alice is a completely wrong alsome Mount Alice
is a fucking I don't know, so incorrectly laid out. It's insane.
I think of Michael Clark Duncan from God of War. That's all that's all
that matters to me. Brother stern Cradles, you bitch, nigga. You
put me here, you stupid bitch. It was like I'm black. That's
why, that's why Credos fucked with him. You know, Zeus was like,
hey, yo, this black ass tighten nigga, Like we're gonna,
we're gonna, we're gonna make him do all. I'm angry and black and
mad and Greek and angry. I'm sure you've seen that cliff of I don't
know who this character is. It's like this little boy, but he just
goes like Credo says, I'm Greek nigga, show me your butthole, and
then he sexually assaults this pig anime character or something, and Palatina think it's
gonna be her, and he's like, I'm Greek nigga, and he the
first time I heard that, The first time I heard I'm Greek nigga,
Like, I was probably laughing for five minutes straight because it was so it
caught me off guard so much. He wouldn't expected those words. Those words
are insane, like in a sentence. Absolutely it makes sense. I'm looking
at a world map right now. Yeah, I'm looking at a world map.
I'm seeing all of it starts with the you know, the United States
on the on the west, and it goes all the way to the east,
and I'm looking at where the Middle East is and it's it's not really
the middle of the East, it's more like east of the Middle, if
that makes sense. So should we change it? Should we have a petition?
Yeah? I think so middle Middle, the East, the Eastern,
the Eastern, Midlands, the East is kind of how I would have called
it. Man, the Middle East is mid Dude, who cares? Because
the Middle East is I'm looking. I'm looking at a map right now.
The Middle East is China, like the Middle the the exact middle of the
East is China, Mongolia, maybe India if you want to squeeze it in
there. But that's like kind of getting a little bit specific, and like
the middle of the West is like the United States. I'm sure there's a
reason why it's all the Middle East specifically. I think that I think it
was called the Middle East because they discovered it first, and then like that's
when they thought the world on they went that far. No, that is,
I think. And they always do things in a dumb way. They
always somehow manage to do things really stupidly, and then they don't change ship
in the three it's like, oh, we found it like this, and
they leave it that way. So the very then and then they never went.
It's how they called the Native Americans Indians. It's like very someone thinkings
like, oh you must be an Indian. It's like crazy wild that is
persistent the longest time. Who still call them Indians? Yeah? Yeah,
really dumb people? They yeah, I mean it's just what do you what
do you do? It's just like, uh, I mean, natives easier,
it's easy, it's easy to remember. They take so much offense to
being called Indian too, I mean, such a great offense to it,
because it is not so disrespectful. It is so disrespectful to a whole other
peoplestand Kingston understand because he's Chinese. Chinese, Nigga, I'm very Chinese.
I'm one fifteenth. Calling Native Americans Indians is basically like calling you Chinese.
Yes, that's why why that's separated. Yeah, why different people history?
Different history is so crazy, Like when you think about it like that,
that clearly shouldn't stick, Like what an obvious thing to just overturn where it's
like, oh, this clearly is in India, this is not Indians,
all right, so let's think of something else immediately, like no, no,
it's cool, we're good. It's uh your opinions. Man, read
the books they wrote about themselves, and you'll be amazed. They'll be like,
holy ship, these motherfuckers won. They won the race to somehow.
I can't believe these motherfuckers won. They're just resilient, man, the resilient.
They almost wipe the gives off. They almost wipe themselves off the planet
by just shitting in the streets and just not having good sewage systems. And
then they fucking rats just started, you know, partying, and then the
ones that were left, you forced, they finished. That theory that that's
those rats really helped them out because they really like they really just leave.
Well no, no, no, what they did. What the rats did
was that they they just carved out all the week, you know, Yeah,
it was. It was the super villa. It was just like,
oh, hey, you're eating, you're shitting in a bucket and then like
dumping it out and then cooking in it and then not even like rinsing it
off before him. It's like, damn, like, get the hell out
of here. That's what. There's so much there is so much ancient text
about them coming to Africa and coming to the Americas and the natives teaching them
to shower regularly. That's corre. That is cara razy to me, dude,
Like, there's African stories that I'm being like, they came here and
they smelled violent, and we were like, you can go in water every
so often and clean yourself and then come out of the water and you won't
smell as bad. And they're like, no, no, no, no,
no no no. The queen said we should not. The queen then
we shall not do that. That is not that is not. Let us
not godly parasites in the water. Powder on my cake riddled ass and it'll
be better. Yeah, I mean, dude, it's just all the evidence
you need is when those fucking when those first pilgrim boats, like the Mayflower
whatever the fuck they were called, started like approaching the fucking Americas, the
water started turning green immediately, and then fucking like say, the grass started
browning as they were getting closer, and then we're getting foot into land,
just fucking ratch just came out of their boots and the fucking belt buckled hats,
and then the natives immediately started dying. They started dying before the first
inkling that these were insane people was that they put buckles on their fucking hats
like that is a psychi that that that is that that is like a propeller
hat basically for that period of time. Like that is fucking insane. Then
you would put a bucket on your buckle on your fucking hat. It is
putting a zipper on your contacts. That is so fucking outrageous. What were
you planning on doing? It's fire, It's so sick. I got those
rats, those sham here bro. Those rats swam alongside the boat, bro
when they were running. Whenever getting tired, they would hold onto the boat
and tread and water and rebalance themselves and then they would go back to me.
They didn't even build a boat. Their boat was just rats entangled in
the shape of do you imagine you serve board rats to America? You serve
board rats rats? Derek, Derek, let me ask you a question.
How would you feel? How do you feel if you you and Jojo?
Right, Let's say it's like, let's say it's five years from now or
whatever. Right, you have a kid and you bring them to the doctor,
and you you bring with the doctor and the doctor walks after you say,
I have I have distressing news your son is rats. I in a
in a in a real world scenario, I'd be like, what the fuck?
What do you mean? You're my son's rats? Your son is in
fact several rats in the shape of your son. Well, I mean,
I'd be like, well, toss it the fun that. I don't want
that, damn, he said, toss it does. But you have memories
with these rats. Five years of memories with these with these rats. Wait,
so you're telling me my fucking my doctor, uh, my family doctor.
After seeing him for years, he realized or what he just couldn't have
the heart to tell me, you know, the hard to tell me.
He yeah, he was having He just couldn't handle a lot on his He
had a lot on his plate, and he couldn't handle breaking that news to
you. He couldn't bring it to you. But it's still like but he's
still but he's still like, it's still your son Connor or whatever, and
he's like, daddy, daddy, but it's rat. Your son's gonna be
named Connor? What A that's definitely not gonna happen. My son's name is
either gonna be a black ass name or a or a a name that is
it's my default whitest ship just because of the origins. Auto O T T
O S. Yeah, that would be fucking that would be so. I
would never, it would never. You know, no offense to the Irish,
but that's disgusting. I hate. I don't know, no offense except
for all offense, all offense to anyone but at the name that I want.
But then because of Jacks from Mortal Kombat Jackson j x O in like,
I want this, and I want that nigga to be like, fucking
look exactly like Jackson in the way that like he wears the metal arms,
he has the mustache and ship, and if he doesn't, I'm gonna disown
him. So first and foremost, your kid's gonna be light skinning, so
well, I want him to at least have the look. He doesn't have
to have the skin. Perplexed, and you racist bitch exactly like him.
You said that, I said, I literally a couple. I didn't even
finish speaking couple. The sentence wasn't even over. When I look, I
understand he's not gonna look exactly like Jackson. That does hurt my heart a
little bit. That's fine. You made you made the choice. Hey man,
you're gonna have some don't bring mine, tiny ass fucking some tiny some
brero wearing, fucking lazy, do not bring mine into this. All right,
you're fucking we're talking about your kids. All right. I'm just saying
you want to, you talk a big game. But then this dude's like,
you know what, you know what, I got this little haunted ass
broad and I'm gonna spit out some piss drinking, little fucking some wearing mustache
ass this dude. Yeah, that is so The running joke on this show
that Lily is a piss drinker, and also that Mexicans are haunted. Converging
in this way is deeply distressing. We're going to be small, daddy.
I'm scared. Can I have some peace? Now? Stop, leave me
alone, Can get out of here. Go by your haunted assist drinking mom.
Go bother your haunted ass, piss drinking mom. I hate this planet.
Go bother your haunted ass, pissed guzzling mother. Fuck you, guys.
That sounds like a good family. I like, my kid is gonna
be sure. They're gonna be so short. I know Lily's probably is gonna
win. They're gonna be short, you think, so they're gonna be short
and round. I know, I know, I feel like niggas fucking like
we always come out on top a lot of most of the time, we
have strong DNA, but so do Mexicans. Literally their famous are having also
strong DNA. Yeah, so at least I can advantage of wiping you know,
JoJo's DNA off the planet because she's just as white as it gets.
So she doesn't have a chance in hell. But what happens is this half
white, half black, half white always ends up with white. That's what
happens every time. Well, I just want as long as I get a
Patrick Mahomes, I'm all right with that, dude. That's as long as
I get a good athlete, Yeah, really amazing athlete. He's gonna he's
dude, he's gonna hear this. He's gonna hear this when he's like twenty
or whatever, when he's like fifteen and he's not going to be athletic at
all, and he's gonna get a complex about it. He's gonna be a
nerd. He's gonna be like Dad, he didn't want me to be read.
I mean, he's like, fuck no, I don't want to be
looking to you, suck. I'll bet the fuck out of him if he
doesn't, like if he wasted his like genetic talent, his gifts, I'll
be I'll fuck it. I'd be so mad at it. Bro, I
don't care. You're you're you're playing football, basketball. And then if he
gets fucked like me, if he becomes genetically inferior right and he's like all
short and ship, then fine, I'm gonna drill him in a video game
st where he can win like every fucking evil tournament and all the ship and
become rich that way. So he's not gonna have a good If they don't
got it, they don't got it in video games. You gotta understand that
some people don't got our fromd Elliott Herman does not have it in video games.
Bro, I think God bless him. Man, he tried. I
love I love Elliott. He's the sweet on the planet. He don't got
it in video games. Look, man, there are people who are just
naturally gifted at things, and there's people who can drill and study, and
I feel like, say, he just lost his belt. Alexander Volkanowski was
that guy where he wasn't like, say, the genetically gifted guy that's just
a natural everything, such a hard working guy. And I feel like,
like, say, even with gaming, to me competitively in as far as
fighting games, I never cared enough. So there's a lot of the mechanics
that go over my head because I just don't care to absorb it. So
when people are having these in depth conversations about like specific coding and frames and
all this stuff, I'm like, I understand what they're talking about, but
I don't really get what Like if they told me off based off of this
information, you should be able to whoop this person's ass. And I'm like,
I whatever, Like I didn't fucking I need to like study this,
And so I'm a force my kid to study, and I'm gonna I'm gonna
do him down forcefully in a chair and then strap him in and then he's
just gonna fucking get good. You know. So I know right now if
I was a kid, I know now based on how I can play shooting
games. Now, if I played shooters when I was small and I was
allowed to play them, I could have been really nice at them when I
was when I was younger. I know, I could have been nice for
my grandmother then let me play games until until I wanted to finish. I
always had to play with the game obviously to you gotta play now that you
gotta stop, do your homework whatever it is, or do shit like that.
I wasn't allowed to really get into shooting games until I was like maybe
living with like living with my friends really like I started really getting into them.
I'm good at them, but I just didn't have the time the plays
much as I needed to when I was younger, and I regret it so
much as I could have been. I know a lot of my friends could
have really gone far video game wise if we just knew the future we were
gonna live in. But our parents are all like, stop, that's not
right, that's you're wasting time. And it's like you dumb old old born
before the eighties, motherfucking idiots. Y'all didn't know shit. They really did
it. Though they really did it. This is gonna be what is this?
It's like they really had no idea, and in fairness, like how
could they, I guess, but like there is you know, I don't
know. My parents didn't like necessarily chastise, but like they definitely I would
I felt like slightly discoded because I would come home, I would go downstairs,
and then they would always do that thing where it's like, oh,
welcome to the who welcome to the land of the living. I would get
that all the time. I was like, well, welcome to the land
of Yeah, shut up, shut the fuck up, shut snarling. You
don't know shiprow. But like, but I did feel like I felt guilty
playing video games, not because they not because they specifically would tell me like,
hey, don't do that, but because like I would always get that
weird like that snide like, oh, welcome to the land of the living.
It's like, oh my god, I'm just I'm just RelA I'm trying
to relax, But I was. It does bother me a lot that I
probably I was. It bothers me that I was so good at certain games
at a time where I was too young to really compete in them. Like
at the time, like I was really really really fucking good at Halo two,
like like really really good. But I had no idea that that was
even remotely something that was worth doing it, you know, Like I just
thought like, oh, okay, whatever, big deal I had no concept
of like MLG or any of that ship until like probably like two thousand and
nine or something like probably high school, and I was like, oh fuck,
that's crazy. And now, dude, now they have esports teams at
like high schools. Crazy, dude, Yeah, that's insane. Crazy,
It's crazy. Definitely, there are schools with Fortnite coaches. Crazy, really
really breathe that in its wild crazy. It's definitely the only jealous thing that
I have as far as I damn ye, I wish we had something like
that for sure, because I that's absolutely I think we all would have leaned
into it, like like, because that was just so not an extra.
I was so not an extracurricular person, Like, I just didn't I didn't
care about going to like chess club or like or like these random clubs that
they had at the school, or like doing sports and anything. I didn't
give a ship. But if that was available, it's like, oh my
god, yeah I would. I would love to trounce everybody. Are you
kidding? That'd be so that would be sick. But yeah, I didn't
have it. Parents are stupid. They're stupid. Yeah, we thought they
were smart and they were dumb. We gave them our trust and they were
dumb. You would have wished that. Yeah, so yeah, whatever,
what are you gonna do about it? But yeah, it's it's I do
I see, man, I see some of those prizes. I see some
of those prizes for not even winning tournaments. Well they'll get like six figures.
Yeah, and I'm like, that's just crazy. I could I know,
I could have competed at that level if I started early, like maybe
not win, but like win like six figures every once in a while.
Absolutely, my family, and it's not healthy. It's not good that it's
like I don't resent my family. I just it's just it's more like it's
just a shame. It's just a shame that it's just a shame that they
didn't not even I don't even think it's the parent. I think I think
really it's it's ultimately like schools and and just adults in general. That's really
because like I mean, it would have been cool for like just people to
just generally understand that that was like something worth doing, you know, so
at the very least, like even if our even if our parents didn't support
it, at the very least, the option would have been there in a
school, so to then to be like, well, hey, look the
school's offering it, so like I'm gonna do it, And then they would
be like they would have really no choice but to you know, at least
somewhat support you. But Alas, I don't even know what the fuck I
did. I think I I think I went to one. I think I
went to one one club in high school and I don't even remember what the
fuck it was. I and I went to one meeting and I was like,
this is dumb. Keep in mind, this is like two thousand and
seven and seven, two thousand and eight, So I remember being like,
this is dumb and gay, and then I laughed, Wow, there's so
many gay people in this room and you get up to walk out. Wow,
that's what I mean, asshole. This room is littered with gay people.
There's a lot of you in here. Are you all gay? Leave
the room and you say ill and you leave? Yeah, by the way,
before the stars, before we move on to questions, because we got
some. We got some questions for the remainder of February to fill out.
I do want to mention that we're on kind of a new We're on a
new Uh, we're on a new schedule. We seem to be keeping to
it pretty well, so I figure we're going to well, we'll let people
know in a in a write up on the Patreon officially, but the schedule
is, uh, if you're watching the video podcast, this is the visual
that I drew up to make sense of it. But this this only makes
sense to me because I've been saying but yes. So basically we record it
looking at it makes soap it is. It makes more sense than words do
to me. It's kind of it's crazy. But so basically we record the
show on Wednesdays and Fridays. That's when we record, and we record two
episodes. On Wednesday, we record the normal episode and then after this episode
today's a Wednesday that we're recording this, we record the extra ammos and then
on Friday we record the second episode of the start Tank and then that cycle
kind of repeats. And so what the schedule right now is the Wednesday episode
goes on Patreon on Friday, then goes on free Feeds on Monday. The
Friday episode goes to Patreon on Monday, free feeds on Wednesday, and the
extra ammal goes live the day, the day after that, the day after
we record it, so Thursday basically, So how the schedule works basically implies
that every time there is a new episode on a free feed, like when
a free feed goes live, there should be a new like a brand spanking
new episode on the Patreon. So if you if you find yourself listening on
free feeds and you're like, oh, I like these guys and you pop
on over there, ideally generally within a couple hours of that upload, uh,
there should be something, a brand new thing on the Patreon for you.
So that's kind of the that's kind of the idea when I was setting
it up. We're gonna stick to it as best we can. We've got
a pretty good we've got a pretty good set right now, so we're we're
doing well. But I just want to clarify that before we move on,
just so that's out in the open and people understand what the schedule is going
forward. It's time we get into the It's time we get into the last
the last remaining questions. Yeah, it did, I mean pretty much?
Yep, so I think uh so yeah. Also, new highest every month
seems to be our highest month ever, and it keeps going. And that
is and that is fucking sick. You have no idea how cool that shit
is. It's why I really want to hammer hammer in this schedule and make
sure everything is set. Also, I almost forgot merch is on its way.
We got we got the site kind of set up basically on the back
end. Everything's there. We just have to kind of get designs, decide
like what kind of clothes we want up there. But that should be coming
to that should be going live fairly soon. I would say, yeah,
definitely, Like for one more contact, I get contacted for one person about
one thing, and our merch is good, it's all good to go.
I need one person hit me up. So what we're going to do?
Yeah, and so what we're going to do with I mean, I haven't
discussed this necessarily with you guys, but I kind of what I figured.
I think we could talk about it a little bit, but I kind of
want to when we start the merch stuff, I want to put it out
on the Patreon first, just so they get kind of preferential treatment in some
way, like just so they get like an early look at it. It's
like they if they want something, they can order it and they get it
first, as opposed to like free feeds. They'll we'll iron it out just
so we can get a sense of like what our audience likes the most of
the designs like, and then we can maybe like focus on those and maybe
siphon some of them out that way when it goes live for everybody, we
have something that is you know, this is kind of business stuff, but
I feel like it's I don't know it it's worth getting into for some of
the audience who might be curious. But anyway, I just want to make
sure that you guys know that merch is coming soon. So let's getting the
questions already. Let's uh, let's do it, Papa Jesus. Papa Jesus
wrote in so it's not a question but a fun fact. There's an album
on There's an album on band camp called My Dick which is just double which
is a just a double length album where a guy lazily covers a bunch of
popular songs but replaces a bunch of the lyrics with My Dick, and the
effort gets significantly lazier as the album goes on. Just though you go to
the boys would appreciate this info I do. I do appreciate. I appreciate
creative, lazy this in that way. Yeah, like there is something about
that that is that speaks to me on a spiritual level. Song it was
like, my dick looked like bla blah, Yo dick look like blah blah
blah blah blah blah Yo dick, blah blah blah blah blah my dick.
It's really stupid. I've never heard that. It's uh, I don't know.
It's very much so like a stupid ass two thousand and four song.
It sounds like what's his name? There's Mickey. I don't know why I
want to say Mickey Avalon or something. I'm probably mixing names up. I
think I know what you're trying to say, but I also don't remember who
it is. I don't remember like this fucking like weirdo dude that uh yeah,
so dirt nasty and Mickey Avalon my dick remember there? Dirt as Yeah,
dirt n Yeah, I remember, got a bunch of lies on Yo
dick looked like supplies from Do you do you guys remember weird Al Yankovic?
No, no, not at all. You don't remember that Soviet Russia.
No, no, no, so weird all Yankee obviously parody artist like a
beloved figure. I would I would really be I would truly be broken hearted
if anything came out about him that was like really really bad, you know,
like that would that would really fuck with me in a way that I
don't think it would Like him and Jack Black are the only remaining people where
I would be like, man, that's really genuinely like, I suspect pretty
much everybody else of immediate wrongdoing, but uh, that would really that would
really suck. But it's crazy, it doesn't make any sense. Mister Rogers,
I really really really look up to him, and if he was a
bad person, my heart would break. Well, he's dead, I know,
But like if they undercovered like mister in fact huge rapists and racist,
I'd be like, God, why I feel like I feel like I think
the like people who have been dead for a long time. I think it's
fairly safe to assume that anything that could be known about these people, anything
that could be known about this, I can't take it. I can't take
it. I can't. Again, I agree, I agree that would be
really disturbing, But I think I think we're in the clear for that.
It's really the alive people you gotta worry about. It's the alive people you
gotta worry about. And then you have like maybe five years of like maybe
something will come out of it. Like Stephen Hawking is a great example,
although to be fairly, I don't know, Stephen Hawking to me is still
kind of like one of those things like midget or something. He was like,
Oh, how could The thing to me is like how could he?
The thing to me is that he's inherently it's impossible for him to be guilty
because he acts the functionality with which to do so. So like I just
don't that buddy, right, Like who's like unless people are like throwing naked
kids on him? Like I just don't. I just don't understand, Like
how I just don't understand how he could have Like can you imagine him rising
out of the chair just because this stepped on my neck? Step right on
it? Right on my neck? Yeah? Yeah hard, I am not
actually happened step on my operating system. Yeah at least go ahead, give
me a virus. Please get me a virus. I need it. I
need it. Oh yeah, that's what that's what I'm talking about. God
I met that's a trojan. Oh yeah, I'm getting frieds are failing right,
all right, all right, right, all right, Jesus, I
love this crazy Yeah what was I saying? What was I saying? There
was this guy so weird yank because obviously like a parody artist, he wrote
a bunch of like popular like parodies of like famous songs, and early on
on the internet, early on, like during the LimeWire days, during like
when you would like steal music, there were a bunch of like really really
raunchy parodies that were made by just completely random people, people with no just
no one ever took credit for these, but they were listed under weird Al
Yankovich. And the idea was that like, oh, you would see it
and you would assume that it was him, but it was always stuff like
I'm I don't know, it was raunchy, like I'm snorting crack out of
this girl's pussy or whatever, and you were like, this is fucking weird
for weird Alta, what the fuck is going on? Like I missed this
album entirely, and I remember on you too. Yeah, maybe hold I
wonder I wonder if anybody else remembers this, because I really think they will.
Weird Al ye because yank a witch. I think it just auto,
it autocorrects to the try to put something else in there, like live wire
or something or some shit. Yeah yeah, maybe weird L Yankovich lime Wire.
Uh yeah, I don't know. This might be ancient history because I
think I think it wasn't that the artist was called weird Al Yankovich. It
was just like it was just like a way for people on LimeWire to download
them, so like the second to download them by accident, So the second
that went away, I think they just stopped naming them that. But I
did find a lie, I did find an article. I did find an
article from seven years ago or a Reddit post on from seven years ago.
Anybody got any any recommend information on Weirdow's LimeWire scandal? Akaa people noting that
all parody songs on LimeWire were written by weird Al even if they weren't.
Has he addressed it it all? I remember using my friend's LimeWire and seeing
a heap of all full parody songs quoted as being weird Al, Like,
yeah, so's people, So people do remember this, but I can't.
I it would it would be a shame to I wish. I wish they
were like examples, because some of them were sucking out of pocket, like
wild Ship, like racist and you're just like, what the stroke crack of
dawn and it's like, what weird? I'll beat that song? That's pretty
crazy. Well, I gotta listen to it now, it's weird. How
you gotta listen. You gotta listen weird. Now he might have something,
might be up to something, and I don't know about cranking my dick to
crack a dog. I gotta listen to it. So I found a playlist.
I don't know if this is if there's anything here that's legitimate, but
the playlist is called weird Al according to LimeWire, And oh that sounds that
sounds promising as hell. Now that sounds close. One thing so cows with
guns and original animation, huh. Another one rides the bus. Uh,
just give me some Barnies on fire, Pokemon thong, so my far will
go on Titan Yeah, like exactly. Like So, so this playlist is
some of them that are real, like some of them are pretty fly for
a rabbi that's weird. Al uh yeah, but then there's like Pokemon thong
song, Like what I was like, what is this? Yeah, it's
it's well the real slim Shady please shut up. Elmo's got a gun.
I like that's pretty good. I like that. Uh, Bill Clinton,
Bimbo number five, that's pretty good. That's ironically a really good name.
But like, yeah, it's just my name weird. Now my name is
Darth Vader. What the fuck my name is? God's name? Is it?
The song? It's just terrible. That's so dumb. It's like these
are so bad. It's wild. But yeah, there was a time where
like I remember downloading something and he's like, this is not This doesn't sound
like weird out to me at all. That's so much. I don't know
if you remember LimeWire doing this auto complete. Uh if you, if you
did, if you, if you executed a search of whatever you're looking for,
there would be some of this results would always have the same suffix on
the end of like eats her outer or something about puzzer gets fucked silly,
So it doesn't matter. You'd be looking for like a death metal song like
oh, Death and Fire, I'm ona marth eats her pussy and it would
it would always say something that like that made it sound like it was poor
to get you to download it, and it was obviously if some sort of
virus. It was always like some hide things worked on me always, always
almost worked on me always, and I'm like, I never dud downloaded.
The only thing and this is I hated this era. It was more Khazo
than LimeWire because people kind of started like reporting it more on LimeWire was better
P two P interaction, but people would fucking you could edit the the significance
of the volume on like say iTunes, for example, you could put up
the volume of a song by two hundred percent and save it and then you
can have it be shared. And so motherfuckers would click on a song and
it would like blow your ear drums out essentially. It would be so fucking
loud, and people would do that just just to fuck with you. Like
I remember downloading, oh, I wanted uh some songs from Metiora, you
know, and then fucking easier to run. I remember that was one that
fucked me good. And then it just starts off so loud. I'm like,
and he's furious you're just furious because it's like there's no payoff. If
you're the person doing it, you don't get to experience them doing it.
You know, No, it is payof knowing you seek chaos. I can't.
The thing that I remember, the thing that I remember most was was
just getting I don't know, You'd be like, oh, man home by
Chris Daughtry, let me download this, and then you'd get the Bill Clinton
audio of him denying having sexual relations with that woman or one other one that
I remember was like some guy going me me me, me, me,
me, me, me, me me me, like pretending to sleep,
and I'm like, this is not Chris Daughtry at all. The fuck the
hell's going? Lo's this? Somebody's got to make a good video about all
that shit, man, Like just all that all the bush that people used
to do. My favorite was definitely that Link song, that legend of Zeldas
song that that everyone thought was fucking system moving down, but apparently it wasn't.
Like everyone that fooled everybody Link down. He's come to save the Prince
is Zelda And I was like, oh yeah, it kind of does sound
like Surge, So it really is a really good fucking surge. It's an
unreasonably good search impression, it really is. Let's see, what would we
type in link? Uh h, I probably put in Zelda Zelda song system.
I thought it was at least I thought it was at least like maybe
them. I thought it was like a legit system of a down song that
they like were just it was like I didn't have a word for it at
the time, but now I would call it like a shit post, you
know what I mean, Like they like they were just like they made it
in like the garage and just like, ah, fuck it, let's throw
this together for shits and giggles, right, And it kind of tracks with
them because even in their main LPs, they have some bullshit in their song.
So you just weren't surprised that they're like, oh yeah, I believe
that they would do this. Alright, let's find out who did this.
Apparently Joe I'm seeing Joe Plyman. Joe Plyman sounds like a bitch. Yeah,
he sounds like a bitch. Bitch bitch everybody's talking about like, yeah,
yeah, anyway, that's that. What were we talking about? Question?
I think answer the question. It wasn't even question. It was just
it was he Yeah, he was just talking about my dick. And then
again we got into a LimeWire rabbit hole. Anyway, big orange and green
doubts. Dick can't fit in a spleen. All right, this is and
it's and it's just like conception minus the boobs. Well, it's the same
as the erection that I get from the from do that's so that's smooth,
My fucking robbed. Oh, I didn't realize that's cool. It's just like
conception that it's the same as the erection that I get from. Dude's got
that kind of coming that you got to kind of tell me that makes me
so smooth. Yeah, give me your rest, give me smoke, dude,
we gotta do that one. We got to do. That's a hard
smooth, you know what, you know what, you know what I'm down.
I am down to do smooth as the extra AMMO today. Yes,
because that's what I had. I'll do it. Do it. I'm not
doing it. We can do it. Case in your hign do her hispanic.
You can do it. Yeah, you got you can do it.
And inherit The spirit of uh uh Anthony Fantano is that it is that the
guy what's his name, Anthony Santana. I can't fucking stand you, bro
respectful. It's the internets busiest guitarist, so disrespectful. Uh, I don't
know what sounds like actually that I think about it, I don't know what
like. I've never thought about what his speaking voice sounds like. Yeah,
I actually can't conceptualize it even slightly. Hey, that's so, just stop
stop insulting him in front of me. I'm Carlos. No no, no,
no no, no, I would pill I would die for I would
die for some good. And I know, actually hearing Mexicans say is so
rare beause they very rarely say that. What's that? What is is like
like like live on or something. I don't I don't know the exact phrase
what it means. It means like it sounds gay, like a bad way.
Just it's it's it's it's sort of like opah, Ill don't say that.
I don't know why. I just can't stand fucking I can't stand Portuguese.
Opah just pisses me off. It's all right, let's let's move on.
The guy. The guy, the guy whose name I just read that.
It's the smooth parody. He wrote in he says, salutations fellas fellas
with the hard R. If you think a C d C being Scottish Australian
is weird, wait until you hear about Freddy Mercury being a Persian Indian born
in Zanzibar. I thought everybody do this. I thought everybody was keenly aware
of the fact that he was. He was like this Persian Indian guy like
that, like lived in like Britain, Land Africa. Yeah, his name
is like his name his really his real name was like Mustafa or something like
some crazy some crazy funny. I mean, I'm just realizing that I know
nothing about Freddy Mercury actually, like I actually don't know anything. I don't
know like say, exactly where he was. I don't know the or I've
never even like I've never watched any that is so funny. I've never watched
anything on Queen Actually, I just enjoyed their music. I don't know anything
about He's from South Africa. I know he's from He's from He's from fucking
Tanzania. He was born in Tanzania. Oh sorry, he's from Tanzania.
He's from Tanzania. But he's like Persian Indian. M. Yeah, his
name is so his name is like uh FAROKSARAA yeah, which was a fucking
it sounds like that sounds like that sounds like an elites name in Halo,
but like, yeah, that's that's him. Yeah, born in Tanzania,
which is like a he was born in Zanzibar stone Town. What no,
huh what excuse me? That's that's so funny? What no, no,
no, just because because stone Town and Zanzibar are that's just so funny.
It's not, it's just vaguely abusing to me that those are. That's a
very specific Halo map is bizarre. No, I did know that. I
just it's just strange to be. It was just it was just a music
because stone Town is also stone Town is where he was born, and that's
also the name of like a Zanzibar remake in one of the in one of
the other games too, So it's like I I didn't know. Yeah,
yeah, so that's it's kind of funny. Literally that must be probably literally,
I actually I wouldn't be surprised necessarily, they like they like queen over
there. But yeah, I said his last name. I'm not surprised by
mercury. God, damn it. I thought I thought he was some fucking
liquid metal. I thought he was actually like I thought he was, he
was related to metal Gear solid. I thought there was something metal Gear's name
is really those names you know that you know that isn't Alicia Keys. What
do you mean? That's bullshit? It's her last name, actually Keys.
I don't know. I don't know. I just don't know. Well,
I was expecting you to don't go along with what it Yeah, it is,
it is not Alicia Key. I was. I was trying to damn
it. I don't know, Derek, I don't know. I came you
for help. That was my fault by using off the off the top of
my head. I couldn't think of another stage name that's so obviously fake like
that. Alicia Keys was like the first thing that came to my because she's
a pianist and her name is Alicia Keys. Shut the fuck up. Of
course it's fake, you know what I mean? So that was the first
thing I thought, Yeah, but I couldn't think of a better example of
something more popular. Huh. Her name is Cook. I think like Alicia
Cook. I think her I think her name is I think it was.
I think it was Alicia, Alicia Mustafi or something. There was Alicia La
Cage is another is another obvious that Vin Diesel. Vin Diesel is a fucking
extremely obvious. Is his name Francis It's it's no. I think it's even
gayer than that. I think it's something like I think his name is like
coppy Cock or something. What, Yeah, that's it. His name is
uh, Jesus Christ of Nazareth. That is that's his that's his first name.
Okay, Uh, Jesus Crist some Nazareth Diesel insane name, that's a
Diesel Diesel. That's his name, Jesus Price of Nazareth. His name is
like Martin Sinclair or something. If I remember correctly, I think it's like
Martin certain he is the most the most stealthily hidden black person and in media
period, he is the most hidden black what what what do you feel about?
What about people changing, like celebrities changing their names. I think if
they have a stupid name, it makes perfect sense. None of my business.
I think if they have a stupid name, it makes sense. Oh,
Mark Saint Clair, like like Olivia Wilde. Olivia Wilde's real last name
is apparently Olivia Cockburn, So like I I is it? Yeah, yeah,
use that ship. Just like I'm actually surprised that all the people like
Marvin Gaye, like Bars Bruno, Bars is Peter Hernandez. That's that's like
tracks that track, it's like my super intend That's totally like every other person
that I went to high school with, Like so that tracks. You know,
like if your name's Peter, it's like that one fucking what was that
one R and B singer fucking thinking just by calling himself Miguel. I'm like,
you're not name. You're not gonna make it in America. You know,
you can make it over like you know what I'm saying, Like they'll
probably give you some love, but like, you're not gonna be an American
R and B artist being named Miguel. It's just not smart marketing. It's
stupid shoot yourself on the foot by just being Okay, Well, so here's
an interesting Katie. Katy Perry's real name is Kate Hudson. Obviously, oh
there's already Kate Hudson and that's right. So how do you feel about that
being the reason why? Uh, that makes perfect sense. I mean,
like you don't want to that's gonna be an SEO disaster, Like you know
you woul't want to do that. Joaquin Phoenix is Joaquin Bottom? Really?
Are you serious? He's a bottom? Damn dude. His brother so his
brother was River Bottom. That name is Bottom? Really? Yeah? Yeah?
Actually I knew. I knew who else I know? Matt Mercer from
Kirk his first his last name was like Marks or something like that at first.
Anytime you hear someone I'm a cool last name, I know it's fake,
like it's it's it was. It was the other side of his family's
name. That's it. It was like the other side I'm gonna take there.
There was because that yeah, yeah, yeah, Like anytime I hear
like a cool like you know, like they'll adopt it, like because because
there's your mother's last name, right, Like my my father's last name is
Jackson, I get it. Kingson crazy Jackson was my father's last name,
kings and Jackson. That's It's a weird name I could have taken. I
could have taken my grandma's name too, because the last name is either Floyd
or Santiago. What the fuck is it? What? What is your real
last name. What is that one related? My grandma my grandmother. So
what happens is my grandmother was married before my grandfather. Uh huh, so
she was a Jamison before she was no, she was a a Floy beforehand.
Her was born to Floy. Her other side was Santiago. Then she
had Graham. Then Jamison was married two times, so a lot of names.
So then you chose a lot of man. Santiago would have been dope.
That sounds like pussy getting name Ciago. What I had to explain so
much more money being Latino than I am. Now changed her name Darky to
be one of us. Really, it was like, no kings in Santiago
is a good name. That's that's a really solid one. Thiago, what
is it? Do you guys know Jamie Fox's real name? I want you
to get name dog. That's so stupid. That's so stupid. I think
you're fined dog with G Jamie Yeah, like Snoop DOGG and them do it
like that's where they got it from. They stole from him, Like I
like that, I like, I like, yeah, I think it's James
Foxworthy. Jamison Foxworthy is his name? Jamison Foxworthy his real name is fucking
Eric. Really, yeah, Eric, such a Jamie. You know that's
bullshit. But Eric Bishop. Maybe because there's a there's a wrestling promoter with
a similar name, Eric Bischoff. He was like, he made a fucking
w c W when they were whooping the w w's ass back in the day,
when they're a w W. F right, So Eric Bischoff. Maybe
it's like, ah, that's too similar, that's too similar. I'm Jimmy
Fox. Ashton's real name is Chris. What the hell is that? What?
No? Really? I thought it's wait, his middle name, his
middle name is Ashton Chris. Okay, I don't know. Chris Cutcher sounds
like a pretty cools. I hate to be honest, I hate Yeah.
I guess you're right, but Chris Cutcher rolls off the tongue though it really
does it does? Ashton? Is this a I'm sorry that I think that
is objectively the widest name on earth? Ashton Tanner Hunters. Wow, damn.
Can you imagine having that name? Like you're a ghost and Sebastian Sebastian,
that's that's like a ghost named Sebastian because their parents wanted to help them
out I feel like it's kind of a It could be I don't know,
it could be a helper or hindrance. I think Sebastian's kind of like in
the middle. You have that stupid crab or lobster whatever it was, and
then you have you have Sebastian. Box say that from Sebastian is the most
famous Jamaican character in media. Don't just act them like that? Alright?
What does that say to you? Brother? That's all. He's more famous
than Sebastian the Lobster craft. Sebastian's the most famous Jamaican Reaper Grim is not
more famous as Batchian. I'm sorry, Chris Grim famous he is not Chris,
he is not. He is not the most famous Jamaican ever. Talking
about those Disney remakes of fucking Adventures and Seastian was more well known than Bob
Marley, wouldn't that be insane? He definitely is a pocket. It's like
I mean, the children, it's not it wouldn't wouldn't be out of pocket.
That's definitely. Bob Marley was singing. He's like he's doing Conscience in
America and the people are booing him and saying brings sound like Sebastian. Bring
out Sebastian, you fraud. Bring out the fucking crab lots or whatever whatever
that thing is. Because like when you look at love, when you look
at shut up, nigga, shut up. Imagine he just gave up.
Though at a certain point he was like fine. Bob Marley comes out.
He's like the glasses on the way he did super passing out, like the
Groopies and ship that is yeah. One guy screams sol out. He almost
involves, Bro, he just gets loaded the older You don't even know the
words. People are chewing on their own mouth, Bro, you know their
own team. There are people, there are people in the audience. There
are people in the audience who are tearing themselves in half up. This is
the disrespectful I've been to my own culture ever. Thank you. I'm always
green the way the old chat floor. Bring out a poop, bring out
a pool, bring out this is the most insane constant and human history.
Bob Barley and Sebaster The crab is fucked. You just sitting in the crowd
looking around like what, Bro? What am I? Why? Why am
I? Why are people passing out and dying? What is it? It's
like a It's like Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson are literally people are literally kermiting.
They're like Kermit waving ship. You watch someone die, someone legitimately dies
next to you. They die and they fall on the ground and then they
start like disappeared, they like despawn or or they die. Have you ever
seen have you ever seen the uh the brad Pitton word war Z movie where
they died and their body starts doing those weird twitches. Those are really weird,
like internal remember and they remember that? Do you guys remember that movie?
Do you remember the guy who ran immediately? No, he didn't know.
He ran up a ramp and then fell and shot himself watching that,
dude, damn, I need this. I didn't. I didn't actually watch
that movie. Actually, gay as fucked. It's not very it's not very
good. Just and that scene is funny, but like you don't have to
watch the all. Anyway, Let's move on. We got uh four more
we can we can run through these pretty yeah, let's do it. Let's
let's keep this a little little lie. I gotta I got some I gotta
pick up my fucking you know a little earlier than a little a little bit
earlier than usual. All right, Yeah, well I don't want to die,
all right, go ahead, all right? So uh, Calandro sucks
toes already. He says, Hello gang, first time Patreon Gang, longtime
viewers since episode zero, Welcome aboard man. My question to you, guys,
any funny stories when smoking the Devil's Lettuce I smoked for the first time
at my buddy's place. After the session, I constantly said I love you
to my girlfriend when I came home. That's not funny, by the way,
funny because he's like one of those Andrew Tape people, like you disrespect
women at all times. You always disrespect women to play. And then he
said, I love you and disrespect women in play chess. I can't.
I can't with you. I care not with you. Isn't that fucking like
isn't that his entire thing? Like you just I always disrespect women in play
chess. You just need to just you gotta just you gotta you gotta make
sure you take out the king and then you fucking slap your woman. You
let her know his boss. And then I was like, oh, okay,
that's good advice. I guess it's better than you've gotta be your wife
every day. You have to be every single day in your room. It's
better than fucking the tall rules of being a dumb piece of ship or whatever
what is it called. I don't remember. I don't think that's what it
was, but I think you're probably on the right track the dumb pieces.
I don't hate you. I hate you, dude, I hate you.
I really don't like you. Bro. Sorry, I'm I'm sorry. I'm
releasing some fucking I had a bad morning. I had a bad fucking morning.
Fucking my doctor is are fucking wilding out, and I just got energy
to release the twelve being a dub piece of ship. All right, all
right, all right, you read thouldn't you. I'd read it fucking cover
to cover, Bro easily weed stories. I think the only one that I
can remember really was accidentally eating seven pot brownies at one of the first get
togethers I had in California. Yeah, Chris, like brownies are like like
like like a normal like you know, like those squares, those bigger ones,
I mean they were like small squares. I guess like they were.
That's better because I like that's it, like maybe like maybe like no,
that's that's a that's like a normal size brownie, like seven of those.
Like that sounds like, how did you, dude? We were all we
didn't so I didn't. I knew there were prop mondis, but it was
like I was like, I'm gonna eat one whatever. And then I remember
getting home. We were all in the house. It's back when I the
living room in the apart in Glendale and I walked this room was like,
yo, dude, I'm so high, it's crazy. And Chris turned to
me and he looked like remember so a spongeob when he was like inside the
house all day and he he was like like a goblin. Chris looked at
me and I didn't see Chris. I saw like a greacher. And I
was like and he was like, yam, I'm sick, dude, He's
a wet sick. We were high well into the morning, well into that
morning, dude. Yeah. I remember specifically because it was one of the
first times that I had been It was one of my first real like times
socializing as an adult on my own out here. So I was like at
our friend Joe's house. He had a party with all these people that like
I had only like known for like maybe like a few weeks at that point,
starting a new life out here, and I was like, all right,
yeah, whatever. It's like there's people bring stuff to the party or
whatever. And I had not really been a smoker at all prior to this,
or a drinker before. Like I just didn't really do that shit at
all. So I got to this party and then they brought there's a bunch
of food there, and I'm eating and here are these brownies and I'm like,
I have one, and I'm like, oh, they taste a little
weird. But like my assumption immediately was like, oh, California, maybe
they're vegan. That was my assumption. It was like, maybe there's like
and I was technically right, there's a plant in the brownies, but like
I just assumed, like, oh, I don't know, fucking vegan brownies,
you know, gluten for I don't know, maybe there's some dietary thing
that's making these taste weird. Whatever. So I had one, I had
two. I had three, and they were really good, and I was
fucking hungry, so I had two more. I had five, and then
I went to grab my sixth one and somebody was like, hey, how
many of those have you had? And I said, well, like five.
He's like, you know, the days have weeded him right, And
I'm like, oh, but I was like, I don't really feel anything,
so there must not be a lot. So whatever, I had two
more and then I got home because I didn't understand I didn't understand like how
much it, like how much like the idea of dosages as far as like
weed or like being high, like I didn't understand them. I figured,
like, if I wasn't feeling anything now after five, what would two more?
Like two more is probably not gonna make a difference, or maybe I
figured, like two more is gonna make me high? Actually, is how
I'm feeling about it, Like I don't know no more. Yeah, I
don't remember much about what happened afterwards, but I do remember. I have
a very vivid memory of lying down on my carpet in my room staring at
my light, like staring at the light and laughing because the lights looked sharp
to me, and I I don't know why that was funny. I don't
know why. I don't even know how that makes sense, but it's what
I it's it's what I thought at the time. And then I woke up
the next day kind of high still, but all things considered, I'm surprised
that I'm surprised that didn't kill me. Yeah, I'm assuming that there wasn't
that many milligrams of it in there. First and foremost, though, like
the problematic NAT, some fucking dipshit leaving weed brownies with all the other food,
Like that person should be stomped out, like this is not that's just
not. Everyone there knew. Everyone knew there knew it was weed brownies.
The problem is, I think Chris came in after. I think even even
so, you don't you don't put them together with all the food. You
just don't for that specific reason. You just don't do that. There your
drugs are separated from your other fucking edibles, uh, because that's just not
how. That's just not how. First of all, I don't even like,
I don't like bringing drugs to a party anyway. I don't think that's
like really, that's just not my type of party, Like people have their
own drugs. And then I it just there's so many me being from California,
the amount of horror stories I fucking hear about people ode because shit like
this not on weed but just other drugs. Yeah. Yeah, it's just
it's just it happens, like in this scenario where people are unaware happened.
So it's one of those things where I'm like, ah, like but you
know, luckily it was just weed and it won't kill you. Like,
yeah, that was that was just. That was really. I mean I
was like twenty two, twenty three, probably not even at that point,
like that was what twenty You were there, right, Kingston? Yeah,
I was there. I was twenty two. I was still twenty two,
so you're still twenty two. Yeah. So yeah, so I mean it
was pretty, it was pretty. It was a pretty long time ago.
Yeah. I didn't necessarily, I wasn't super comfortable, so I didn't even
feel good asking people like what was what do you remember? I'm a it's
a very different person. Do you remember when it started to kick in?
No, I that night is gone. Yeah, Like, I do not
remember why that party took place. I do. I only remember like one
or two people that was even there. I don't remember how I got home.
I don't remember. I don't remember anything. I just remember laying down
on my floor when I got home, staring at the light laughing at how
sharp it was and being confused, and then falling asleep and I slept so
good. Yeah, that's the only story that I can really bro You were,
you are gone. You are gone with your sleep. You are sleeping
hard. The only thing I hate about sleep smoking weed is about smoking weed
is that one I have really intense dreams about nothing. So I wake up
like sweating, and I'm like, what did I dream about? And it
was just nothing. It was like lying down. It was just like I
had an intense lying down session and I'm sweating. I I literally can't stand
smoking anymore now, Like in my current adult self, I refuse a smoke
wheed. I can't do it. I was never really smoking the first time,
like peer pressure. It was peer press drunk a ship at a party
and my friend wouldn't take no for an answer and or whatever, and I
think, yeah, just I guess that is pretty normally crazy. Only I
think the only reason, I think, the only reason I even started at
all, I really had no interest or intent to start smoking weed at all.
I think still to this day, I've smoked weed like in an in
joint form, probably like fewer than probably fewer than thirty times. Fewer than
twenty times for sure. Yeah, I think few. I think maybe,
like, I don't know, like maybe fifteen times. Same like probably I
would say fewer than twenty as well. I haven't smoked weed that much.
I've only done edibles twice, but both times are awful. Five I've done
edibles a ton. Yeah, they don't edibles. Edibles I like. I
hate edible. They don't sneak up on me way more my thing. My
edibles have to be activated. Well, one of the the two times they're
activated by having regular food afterwards, where I had an entire brownie, I
was fine, I drank some beers and I'm like, I don't feel anything.
This is bullshit. Went to Denny's later on in the night, and
when I took a bite of my burger, you know, and it started
going into my stomach. That's when liftoff happened. While I'm at Denny's,
I was like, what fuck? And then same deal with my my supervisor
for my my job that I shouldn't have my accounting job. He gave me
a weed jolly rancher while I was on the job, and then same thing
at my lunch. I went to the Greek place next door, got some
fries and then fucking tunnel vision. I started freaking out my my friend like
I'm like, bro, I told him like, dude, I think I'm
gonna pass. I was like, nah, dude, just sit down,
Just sit down, because I was just like looking at everyone like it looked
like I was looking through like a spyglass. And I'm like, dude,
I'm gonna speak. I'm gonna pass off for sure. He's like just going
down. I think I'm gonna I think I'm dying. I still want to.
I was like, fuck, I'm at work. I don't want like
the bo like the supervisor was just a redneck piece of ship, but the
main boss. I was like, I can't let him see me like this,
Like I got scared. You can't see me this high so embarrassing.
Yeah, I really had no one to I would. We were at I
don't know. I think the first time I was like I was at a
party and then this girl that I kind of had a crush on was like,
hey, you want to smoke. I was like yes, yes.
It was like I know I didn't want to smoke. Literally, I'll do
literally anything you ever asked me to I will do anything you asked me to
my best friends here, I'll kill them for you. If you show me
one nip, I will slaughter them. That's crazy. It wasn't that,
dude, It wasn't that insane. I was just like, oh, this
is a good opportunity to talk to this, But it wasn't that fucking do
it. But then I didn't know how to do it, so I choked
it as the worst mistake ever. Show me, baby, show me,
show me how smoke baby. You see that get over there, that that
dumb black get over there, I'll slit his throat for you. Imagine saying
that to someone just that you've known for like a few weeks, that you
just kind of like, you see that dumb black kid over there, I'll
kill him for you. You commit you hard, hard, so hot,
and then you're like fucking now murdering a bunch of people for a nipple.
Hm, that's crazy. I don't eve think I would get up. It
just shows you just the wasn't killed a little top of the nipple f scene
wasn't killed. He was rapt into heaven. Hello schizo demons. If Keith
David shows up on the podcast. If Heith David shows up on the podcast,
that is legally your last episode. What will be your individual plans post
Snark Tank. We'll just starting to start another show. It's just it's the
show, but it's not called snark We just yeah, probably we'd have to
we'd have to end Stark Tank. We'll figure out I don't know, we'll
figure out some better name. We're not gonna tell you our ideas for it,
because then you'll just take your rabbit fu rabbit idiot bitch slaming your neck
as hard as I can. Anyway, Snapple owns you who wrote in He
says, greetings, boys, what's the worst thing? What is the worst
thing you've ever participated in? During middle school? For me, it was
when during a large nerve battle at our church's youth group, one of the
kids had a mental breakdown and began to walk in a big loop around the
building and was unresponsive. Nobody asked if he was okay, not even the
church members running the event. Some of us battled around him like a payload
card t F two. That is fucking crazy. He's just like an environmental
hazard. That is madness. That is madness. This kid church for you,
man, like, yeah, whatever, yeah, you we'll pray for
him. Yeah, I may, I may pray for him. I'm I'm
maybe pray pray for him. Just dumb. I may pray dumb kid send
him to hell. Yeah, I don't know if I have anything. I
don't have anything, Like middle school is so long ago at this point that
like, I don't if there were things like this, No way in hell
I can remember. I guess, like the only thing that I could think
of. And I told I've told this story before. It's what I convinced.
Is when I convinced that kid, who was like a couple of grades
younger than me, that I was an alien and that I was getting ready
to destroy the earth. Yeah that's badass. And he really believed it.
And he was so scared kid, so scary, dumbest toast and man,
yeah yeah, I think his name was Derek too. But it was like
the normal normal, Yeah normal, you know what I mean? It is
you're the abnormal. Say what you mean? Yeah? Don't. People don't
normally spell it. That would be like if somebody spelled their name Chris with
a K. It's like that's not the normal way to spell Chris. It's
a fine way to spell Chris, but it's not the normal. I actually
disagree. I don't think it's fine at all. I think that's psychotic and
you're gonna end up a fucking murderer. Like that's what I feel like.
Murderers are born by parents making dumb decisions like that. Yeah, decisions makes
I really, I truly believe, Like, like it's always how come the
a fucking chicken from the South named Bertha? How come she's fat as fuck?
How come people named Simon happen to get into the sciences? How come
fucking people that have two names sticks together? I'll end up being psychopaths.
Like it's just you're twisting their fucking minds. Man, stop it stop.
Just don't give them a name. Yeah, that killing people? You're killing
people. How do you, like, how would you address them? Like
like untitled you? Hey? You? What do you? What do you
do? Hey? I've ever thought about that? Are you required by law
to name people? Like that sounds like a stupid question At the same time,
I don't know. Yeah, Like if you have a kid, you
can't not name him? Huh? Is that? Is that? Like?
Really? Like because you have to and apparently is there because somebody said there
was no laws against naming them a slur? But is that true? I
mean, I mean I'm in a bad word like like is that like somebody
told me that I never looked it up because I was too lazy, that
like, there was no rules against If you want to name your kid fuck,
I think you could. That sounds wrong, that doesn't sound like correct
to me. But at the same time, I feel like nobody is that
insane enough to do it, So that's why it's never happened. Right,
Let's see, let's see can he bothering having a son? Having a kid
like putting against like you're about to You're making this big choice and you're you're
putting your wife through hell and then offer a fucking joke? Right? What
is? What is? Uh? Guess what the number one auto completion in
Google is? Can I name my kid? Blank? Guess what the name
is? No? Good guess though, think more autistic sonic close. Sorry
I should have sad autistics, but just think more termally online. Uh can
I name Uhlon? You guys are so you were closer with the with the
cartoon character kind of Oh? Can I name my son? SpongeBob. That's
cool. Yeah, I mean, you definitely could. But it's Shrek.
It's Shrek. It's Shrek. It autocompleted. That is fucking wild. I
wonder how many Shreks there are. There must be at least two Shreks.
There must be there must be minimum at least two Shreks living in the US
today. How many Shreks are they? How many Shreks are there in the
US. How many Shreks are currently walking around right now? How many Shreks.
It's just it's just how many Shrek movies? How many How is anyone
named Shrek? What? No? Come on, that's so disappointing. There's
no Shrek. There's no there's no like Shrek. Bryan's Well, so here's
the summary. Here's the summary according to My Name Statistics, which is like,
I don't know who the fuck knows how valid this is. Shrek is
ranked two hundred and sixty eight nine and sixteenth most popular name given in the
United States, with an estimated population of five. This name is in the
first percentile. This means that nearly ninety nine percent of all first names are
more popular, and there are there are zero point zero people named Shrek.
For every one hundred thousand Americans, this name is used most often as a
last name ninety percent of the time, based on the analysis of one hundred
years worth of data from the Social Security Administration. So people change their last
name to Shrek. Is that what they're saying? They used their as as
the last name. Is that what that you said? Yeah? How the
fuck? Oh? Summary the race? What the fuck? The race?
Fuck? Sorry? The race and Hispanic origin distribution of the people with the
name Shrek is forty percent White, one point three percent is Hispanic origin,
seventeen point four percent Black, thirty seven point eight percent Asian or Pacific Islander
two percent two or more races, and one percent of American, Indian or
Alaskan Native. So there are very few uh Native Alaskan Shreks. They're not
They're not a thriving breed just by just by default. I can't see.
I guess last question states. Yeah, I was just gonna say about the
bad words thing. Some states are bandoning it, but I don't think every
state bans it because I think they imagine adopting a black child just to name
it Edward. Oh my god, I mean yeah, I can imagine some
people that lived there in the South, I would think that's hilarious. How
we get back. This is how we get back on them. We adopt
them. We're gonna raise this kid and treat them good, but also name
him nword hilarious. Last one, the last one, SS Officer Sweeney wrote,
and he says, greetings boys, I have filled my brain with all
four hundred plus hours of this dumb ass podcast. Oh damn, there's that
many. Jesus Christ. Uh. And now that I have enough money to
ask questions, I just have one. Which of the Snark Tank spinoffs is
your favorite? Chris and Sweeney, Derek and Sweeney. My absolute favor would
be that one time Chris everything broke and Chris was forced to do the last
half of the podcast by himself, like a schitzo. I have to be
I have to I put this in the specific I put this in the episode
specifically because I don't remember this. Did this happen? Did I have to
finish an episode by myself? I don't remember that. It doesn't sound though,
I mean yeah, but I have no recollection. I remember doing the
solo episodes. We've done solo episodes in the past, but like I don't.
I do. I do not remember everything breaking to the point where like
I had to do it by myself. I would say, uh, link
that episode because maybe maybe it's a possibility that like maybe maybe it was at
the point where I started editing, I fucked it up and then you were
the only track left or something. I don't know, dude, that would
be funny. It's the funny at FU. I feel like I would have
been a warrior of that that happened, though, like if that if it
would have right, I don't know. Yeah, yeah, like I definitely,
I definitely yeah, like leave leave the episode number or whatever that one
was, because I don't remember that either. Yeah, if it's if it's
your favorite, link it to us, because I really, I sincerely have
no memory of that happening. Yeah, which is wild and deeply deeply concerning.
You know, a lot of times the balance, I think the balance
is good with three of us, So a lot of times when there's like
somebody lacking, there's a little bit like you you notice it. But uh
did we did an extra Ammo. It was just just Sween and Eye and
we created a movie called Shut the Fuck Up that I really liked, I
really liked. I actually was the musical. It was like it was like,
what was it? No, it was a movie that Biden, Oh,
Biden fucking gets the causes the new nuclear holocaust, like the the Third
World War, because he goes to sit down with Putin but he's so fucking
like dementia riddled at that point. He strolls into the meeting thinking he's a
clown. So he's wearing clown makeup and a clown costume and he's doing tricks
on Putin and squirting him with water, and Putin is so embarrassed he fucking
body flops on all of the nuclear buttons, like you know, there's just
like nuclear buttons that like dirt all of the nukes and stuff, and he
just fucking slams his whole body on him and then just destroys Russia, which
caused a nuclear winter. And because of that, comedy is forever banned in
the new fucking when when humanity there's no more comedy, no more comedy,
And so the movie is called Shut the Fuck Up. That was you that
you were like what should be called? I'm trying to think of something clever,
and this d just shut the funk up, like okay, sucking film.
The idea of a film being called shut the fuck up, I thought
that was I was like, oh that was money. Yeah, shut just
shut the matter ridden ass up. There'd still be jokes and laughter. I
love that he made it all the way there. Nobody checked him. He
was a clown the entire way, flying in the fucking Air Force one and
all, just as a clown. He's sitting now peacefully to like it's not
having like a wild cloud. He just got to sit there waiting to get
to get Yeah, he's ordering food normally, but this is the this is
the most lucid he's been ever in like years. I really hope we get
it. He starts getting goofy and so these steps off the plate, he
gets silliest ship. That's good. I want to see a clown hit somebody
face on a pie and kill him. A really funny thing was that killer
closs spaces of the closest thing will see to that because they're trying to be
scary. Like they're trying to be scary. I want silly. I want
silly to a dangerous degree, Like I want so silly. It's like fucking
dangerous. I'm gonna watch that scene man where he like kills I can't remember.
He's a copper security guard, same ship whatever, and he just they
just throw pies himuntil he dies. He just he just gonna do with the
he threw. You're making a Kill a Clown video game. I think I
think I'm coming out this year something out this year excited. It should be
fun. Man. So before we uh, before we get into uh the
credits, which we will get into very very quickly, I do think I
kind of want to get into a habit of reading the comments or like reading
some of the comments that was that we're on the last episode from our Patreon
members as we close out the show, because I think would be cool to
kind of like because we never really address any of the things that we would.
We never really talked about the reaction to the stuff from last episode,
and this this last episode had some really funny ones. Silk Song Believer wrote.
He says, seeing that the credits started with like fifty minutes left brings
me so much joy. Uh. Sweeney's girlfriend Archives says, watching porn on
four screens like your mister Spock is crazy. The virtual would He's like moving
everything around. Yeah, like you ever watched Minority Report or to Report with
the freak's name, that little freak, the top gun guy. I can't
remember his name, Tom Cruise. Yeah, thank you. I hate you,
that little freak. I hate you. To be fair, I think
he's like an inch taller than Yeah, he just he's taller. I think
he is that five seven or something. Yeah, he is is. He's
tall seven, he's five seven, let's see yeah seven one inch? Yeah,
one inch? Yeah. I feel like I might be five to five
now though, because I think my disc collapsed and I had this creasey my
neck. Like I seriously think my like disc and my neck collapsed, and
then like I'm just a little bit shorter now, dude, people who have
neck issues. It happens. Like people get there and then they'll grow.
They're like, oh, I'm like an inch taller now. And I'm like,
bro, because like I see these creases in my neck that I'm like,
oh, my ship's like been kind to crouch down. I didn't used
to have these creases in my fucking neck. So I'm my god, what
are you gonna do? I think my head smashing my neck? Well,
somebody somebody wrote in Bacon Ready says, fuck you, guys. Connor was
awesome. I agree to disagree Connor because we were talking about Assassin's Creed.
We we talking about Assassin's Creed on the lasts, Assassin's Creed three. Connor
was fine. I didn't hate him. He just wasn't memorable to me.
He didn't fucking he was forgettable. He wasn't bad. He was forgettable,
which I think is kind of worse in some ways. Stopped starting. I
don't want to play fucking kid version, Like this is the first thing you
do. You start off being kid version of Connor. I'm like, wow,
funk would I want to do this ever? Ever? In any game?
I don't want to be kid version of Badass Warrior ever. Propane is
a hell of a drug. I tell you what wrote in he says that
Buffalo Talk really had me wanting to peel my face off, which should have
done it? Should have done it. I'm sure some fucking autism everything about
Buffalo I'm sure that's what That's what this, guys is Like, why don't
you Why don't instead of talking about it? Why don't I talk about it?
Next time you peel your face off. How about that. Actually,
I have a certified I am a certified buffologist, and uh I know a
lot about the buffaloes. Speaking of that, real quick quick, speaking of
that, I did remember because I did look up. I was while I
was editing the podcast. Horses did used to exist in North America, but
they went extinct. They migrated into Siberia like fucking everybody did back in the
day. They all just like they're like either they went across or they went
you know they always use that that bridge from Alaska to right. Yeah.
Yeah, so horses, they they migrated and then the ones that stay behind
they went extinct. And then so then the colonizers brought them back to North
America. So I just want to clarify that. But technically I was correct,
but then also not really the cottonizer. I guess technically I was wrong,
but whatever. Yeah, the colonizers. Literally when I was reading an
explanation people they called them colonizers. I was just like, well, it
is accurate. They literally colonized area and fucking brought them sweet horses. Everything
from me, they striped, they gave me English. I want to speak
the last, the last, the last two Uh I asked the rock for
his autograph. I told him my name is Derek Blackman. He death and
he death gripped my balls and said it's about Dick wrote in I know that
he said he did say it, but he said, I know that porn
scene. Dead ass, let's go. It is fucking's so funny. There
was a there was a couple of comments like that. There was just like,
I know exactly what they're talking about. Uh. That beldonovid was way
easy to find. It was one of them from Unnamed Drone. So that's
that's funny. Uh. There's one other one that I wanted to read before
we we we oh. The artist formerly known as Cimen m wrote in he
says, please make an entire extra ammo uh, dedicated to Sweeney reading hate
comments. Miles Morales has bioelectric powers, not electrokinesis. Sweeney massages his throat
with Miles's cock, and he deserves his imaginary figure just said that bioelectricity and
electrics aren't the damn it. They're not the same. You see, you
see, you see this is the stuff that bothers me. Right, this
motherfucker with his whole chest, right, his whole chest he was like,
I got him, I got him, I got him. It's not the
same thing, because I look, I saw a different word. It is
the same fucking thing, dude. It is literally the same kind of power.
It's the same power. Uh, broadly it is. But the implication
of the same power, the implication of electrokinesis means that you can channel energy
in a very very controlled way, versus electric general electric bioelectric powers just kind
of means you have the power to channel electricity, doesn't necessarily mean you can
control it with the effectiveness of like making a fucking shape out of it.
Uh, that's kind of the difference because knesis apply. That's kind of a
difference. And well, no body just means you can control electricy likeness means
you can control. That means it's control. But control is different. Control
is different than simple simply like powers. You know, like, would you
say that Cyclops has laser kinesis, you know, Like, I don't,
I would, because Cyclops never shows the ability to do it other than it
just pouring out of his eyes. I know what you mean, right,
But when Miles Maolis shoots lighting out of his hands, that's electric canesis and
he's been doing that for a while. You know, I don't think he
can, but I guess I guess my thing is like even now maybe can
maybe the comics control it, but maybe maybe the comics it used to be
different. But like from my understanding and by playing the game, every electricity,
every electric power that he uses, it's like it's kind of like generating
around his fist and he like hits people with it, or he shoots like
a general kind of like spread it's almost like a shotgun blast of electricity where
it's it's not like he's controlling exactly where he's going. He's just kind of
like directing a really unruly fountain of electricity. So that to me is like
it it's not storm. It's not storm. That's right, it's not storms
level control. But that's but that's why that's why I used the spit analogy
last time, Yeah, which I think makes sense, because like you can
spin on somebody, but you can't control, like, you can't really control
it once it's out of you. It's just kind of unruly the second it's
out pretty much right, granted, granted, granted, gonna go back to
what I'm saying. I think him. Having the power to create an electric
sword is cool in moments, but I think it's very unnecessary because he has
so many powers already Spider Man or so many powers you know as Spider Man.
He's super straight, super speed, enhance their ability, he can heal,
he's fast as fuck, you can fucking lift ten. All that shit
is pretty It's pretty impressive right now. One power I like is that Miles
has a spider sense. Some simmer. Peters's okay, right, he has
a spider scent. It's not quite as strong as Peters, so we can't
detect danger quite as well. But what happens is he has electric powers as
well. He can sense electricity in a general area. I think that is
cool. I think that's gay ass bitch boys. Shit, I think you're
gay as bitch. I think you wrote it because you're a gay ass bitch
boy. You gay get dumb? Yeah, I wrote it that fucking everybody's
making we're making fun of me and sitting there quiet get his ideas. Shut
on it all right, Uh, dumb people, Let's get the fuck out
of here. Yeah, let's let's get the fuck out of here. Thank
you guys for your support over a Patreon of the complast. The start tank
means a lot. We had our biggest month again pop out there. I
wanted to followers. I saw sacred symbols. They they dropped a clip and
they like, look, I can't believe people support all this because we will
take a million years to get into what we're supposed to talk about. And
them niggas, I haven't seen you guys Patreon a long time. And he's
like, man, there's like fourteen thousand of you niggas. Like I think
Colin said that verbatim. It's like, there's like fourteen thousand of you bitch
niggas. That's like, thanks my niggas. And I was like, damn,
that's fucking that. That's an army. That's a real army, right
gross. And I'm like, we just that, you know it fucked that.
I want to I'm a I'm a competitive ass motherfucker. I'm taking you
guys down. I know it's I know it's your shape, Chris, but
I'm taking we're taking their asses. I want fucking fourteen thousand whatever and one
I want one more. I always want one more than one. Hate It's
like it's like on freaking what it's like on the show with a Bob Marker
where it's like it's a twelve hundred dollars fucking dining set, twelve hundred.
I'm like pieces bitch ass niggas as bitch ass niggas, like I want to
always whip those people's asses. And so I guess I think Colin would be
like I would. I would absolutely do that. I would absolutely do that
because why are you not do that? It's just because it's just smart.
It's such a smart strategy. It makes so much sense to do that.
It is not to do that, it just feels it's but I because like
even in the competitive sports, there's some things that can in the fight really
fast. Like there's a thing called an the bleak kick because that angle which
could really fuck someone's knee up and just put them out of commission for like
nine months. And most people don't do it out of respect, but there's
a handful of assholes that fucking do because they're like, hey, there's a
fight, it's a fight, and they're correct, they are correct, but
everyone's still like, man, fuck that guy. And that's the people that
do the one dollar thing, because like it is, it's a smart strategy.
It really is, but it's still this planet is outrageous, dude,
Like I like, I have my whole life. I'm like, oh,
you don't do certain things. It's like you're supposed to respect people you encounter.
And then I mean people like you, Derek that are just like out
through sand in someone's eyes and try to eat them, And it's like,
what is What's what? Why do I exist? Then? You know,
like what am I here for? Look, I'm not a sandman, but
I am if a guy in real life is trying to like really assault,
like really, I will, I will fucking hyper extend their knees to the
point where they look like arbiter like like that and someone's there's a long anymore.
There's a scene in Adventure Time. I've never really sat and watched that
show, but I think about it every fucking day. I think where a
deer, a deer stepped like just stomps on on Finn's legs and folds them
backwards, and it is one of the That scene kills me every time.
I have not seen that show really at all. I haven't sat through a
single episode of it, I don't think, but that clip is like one
of the funniest things I think I've ever seen. Yeah, adventure Time.
Adventure Time has someone what's happened at the beginning of that fight? To that
fight? A deer stands up on the tine legs and takes off its hoes.
Yeah, hands, and then he just and then he just stomps on
his legs. He doesn't even use his hands. Evil show revealing hands as
a deer is broken. That is a I like, I do, like
the idea, the idea of like, I have an idea, I have
an idea. Let's let's let's reveal that the deer has hands. It's just
such an unhinged ideas and everybody the up clapping. All right, let's move
on it. Let's let's read the twenty five dollars patrons, You get the
hell out of here, cha, Yeah, bub counting down bub three bub
three two three fucking c bub three bumb four bums. Like I don't know
what's happened to the Holocaust? I don't know. Yah, that's Professor X
beaming the Holocaust and the magneto's head is crazy. It's because it's because it's
more context and that, but it's still pretty stream though it's still pretty oh
yeah, down he's like Hitler at that little ship. You knock me down.
Huh, you knock me down here, you knock me out of my
chair. It's like, you know what's crazy? You know it's crazy.
I hate I hate to say it, but Magnetos right. Magnetos a hundred
percent right the whole time. He's been right, Like the whole entire story
of X Men. Magneto's always right. It's just that he's walling, he's
bugging, but he's two hundred percent correct the whole He's got a wheelchair.
I'm professor. You know how long it's gonna take me to stand back up
in that wheelchair. You'll pay for that. Literally, I'm not gonna get
me any pussy Jean be able to walk, have a taste of have a
taste of the Holocaust. Many people. I didn't do that. I didn't
beam the Holocaust into someone's head that I wouldn't would I would absolutely not do
that. I disagree. I think it's funny. I think the idea of
that is funny, but I would never do that. You wouldn't do a
You would not be a trans Atlantic professor X beating the Holocaust in your enemy's
brains. I would that people's minds. I would put like the worst.
I would find the dark web snuff films and put it in people's brains,
like, hey, you didn't know this is TONU. You beam the Funky
Town Cartel video into people's heads when they're like the second they wake up.
Oh no, you know what. I know what that is. By way,
I do not google that. It's here. Yeah, it's really not
funny, it's it's probably really it's the least funny thing I've ever seen.
In fact, terrible. That just makes me cry. It's bad anyway's yeah,
Sheldon, Okay. Twenty five dollars. Twenty five dollars is the base
commission rate for for the N word on fiver. Dang, it's crazy.
It's a good you know, on fiver that's a pretty steep tax. But
it's but in just real world money, it's pretty cheap. Chernobyl, Fleshlight,
Macjackal. You can find me in the club butt hole full of come
my pussy. It's the best if you fucking butts. I'm into gape gaping
sex. I ain't into women. Women love using Swede's curtains to wipe the
sun come off him? How do you make the names longer? I won't
let thanks Jack the world's fastest Maori, it's fatstest, not not fattest,
you clown. My piece is so big. Call it one cock. That's
so dumb. Ben Shapiro destroys woke student by shoving them in a hydraulic press,
actually kills he. Actually, I love that all of these people actually
start killing people, literally destroying, literally destroys. I'm Ben Shapiro flying like
a universal health care. Yeah. Here, here's a wood chipper. Huh,
here's a universal press. It is not gonna jokes at all. Press,
I see like prussing things. Huh. How about I press your head
latinous? And I believe, well, I well, I believe mister,
mister Ben Shapiro that what's happening in Gaza it is a genocide. I was
like, well, I'm gonna let's see. What if not even Wire was
I would subscribe. I would subscribe to the Daily Wire. Dude. If
it was just Ben Shapiro failing to come up with clever insults and then reacting
angrily by shoving people into hydraulic presses, I would pay every bit of money
that I own, to see all of it, I would be the highest,
would be a tier five if that was possible. People and depressed.
I have been Japiro getting angry enough to shove people to kill them. It's
right. You get possess anger and he does something outrageous. You're like,
why is that? The visualization, the visualization of him stomping like him angrily
sauntering towards an individual is really great. I like the idea that this is
becoming our impersonation of just anybody anyone stinks. Yeah, the andy of the
man whose handies are steer and dandy. Five Filipinos versus almost twenty Mexicans,
a real video. I could have gotten a taboo a taboo. Oh,
I could have gotten a tattoo of anything and chose, uh, rise fucking
rise against that's true. I also got a BioShock tattoo. Heath Smoker A
PB and J is a sandwich. I'll be it a sugary one. You
cock fair enough? I don't. I don't agree. Chris is Progerian.
Uh yeah, sure, this is anal dwelling. I don't think it constitutes
a sandwich in this wait, I had I said it on Twitter a while
ago. I mean it is a sandwich in the same way that a mattress
is a blanket sandwich, where like it's it's I guess theoretically like not what
the sandwiches wait to me. To me a sandwich. To me, a
sandwich is meat, cheese, lettuce, or any combination of those three,
or any of those three in specific isolation. So like you like just like
a normal salam sandwich, or you could have like maybe even like a bacon,
egg and cheese where there's like eggs and there's like meat and well,
the definition of a sandwich is cond I understand what the definition. I understand
the definition of a sandwich. Okay, so you aware you're talking about I'm
talking about the feeling because if we're just going by like what the computer says,
then we're no better than AI. That's how I feel about it.
It's like if we're just words, don't make it so definitions don't matter,
don't matter, use no definitions matter. I just feel like there's colloquialism in
the way that we talk about things that isn't entirely always accurate. Like the
best example that I can think of is like killer whales aren't whales is a
good example, right, where like killer whales are not whales, they're fucking
dolphins, but we call them killer whales because that's just what we call them.
I think a peanut butter and jelly sandwich is a sandwich in purely in
technicality alone. But if somebody was out and they were like, hey,
guys, I'm coming back with sandwiches, and they didn't tell you what kind,
and you got excited, like, oh sick, I'm excited for the
sandwiches, and they came back with peanut butter and jelly, I'd be fucking
livid. I'd be I'd be disappointed if they came back with fucking peanut butter
and jelly, because that's not what my in my mind, what a sandwich
is. If you google the word sandwich every you will have to scroll for
ages before you found an image of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. It's
just, it's just that's just the nature of what a sandwich is. People
have a very specific flavor profile when they think of them. People have a
very specific image when they think of them, and I just don't think it
really lends itself well to what a sandwich is. I think a peanut butter
and jelly sandwich is basically an under an uncooked pastry peanut butter and jelly.
It's too sweet, It's like it's borderline candy. And I don't think it
qualifies as a sandwich personally. I'm not saying it isn't sandwiched, because that's
a verb, but I don't know. It's like splitting a It's like splitting
a fucking uh what do you call a pop tart in half and being like,
oh, well, it's that's a sand that's a bunch of a sandwiches,
a peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Look, I think I think it's
perfectly logic. Get what you're saying with the with when you're talking about people
envisioning a sandwich, obviously there's a devil. Just like a burger. There
are many types of burgers, right, just like in other countries, a
chicken sandwich is not a chicken sandwich, it's a chicken burger. Like so
when they're like and I deal with this by having a European wife where she's
like it, get me the chicken burger, and my mind fries a little
bit because we don't call it, you know, it's it's a it's a
colloquialism. It's a colloquialism, and I get that, but like it's it's
kind of like a burger, right, Like a burger is not a sandwich,
but it is, Yeah, you know what I mean. So it's
like like and it is literally a sandwich, but you would never fucking say
that, And that's kind of how I feel about it. It's it makes
I get what you're saying. Especially you have to make context if you're saying
a peanut butter J. Like if somebody said, like, I'm gonna bring
sandwiches back, they would have to clarify that it's peeb and J, you
know, because otherwise you would expect a normal sandwich and then you'd be fucking
upset. I agree, but that's but that's the thing I would expect.
But if somebody just said sandwich as a blanket term, there's so many things
that I would accept. Like I would accept the bacon, egg and cheese.
I would accept the belt I would expect. I would accept the chicken
sandwich, I would I would I would accept a PASTRAMI sandwich, a ham
and cheese, salami and cheese, Like there's a There's so many things that
I would be like okay with if I was if I was given like,
hey, we're I'm coming back with which is? And that's all the information
peanut butter and jelly. The fact that you would have to specify that in
and of itself kind of implies that it's in its own kind of separate caddy.
It's it's more of a pastry to me, Like it's just like the
flavor profile, like the way that you eat it. It's just I don't
know. Every time I saw somebody eating peanut butter and jelly sanwich for lunch,
I was like, that's fucking gross. I'm not personally lunch. I'm
not even a huge I'm not a massive advocate of I feel like sometimes I'm
in the minority of mixing savory and sweet flavors together. I'm just not really
a huge fan of it all that often. So I would just be a
regular peanut butter I love. I love the taste of peanut butter, and
like having a toasted bread for putting peanut on it is fucking delicious to me.
You throw jelly on it, grape strawberry, doesn't fucking matter all of
a sudden, the flavors are complicated to me. It's it's not it doesn't
accent. I just don't think. I think salty, savory things and sweet
rarely accent each other. I know that you gave an example of those caramel
cheese. It's rare. It's rare, ye in my opin. I yeah,
yeah, it's just I just normally I wouldn't want anytime somebody offered me
like a PB and jan I'm like, I'm good, but uh, I'll
I'll fuck up just a I used to do this. It would be my
protein snack before I would go to the gym, Just a little bit of
peanut butter butter on a fucking sliced bread and then throw it in my mouth
and I'm good to go get some calories in. Would you agree though?
Would you agree though that a sandwich kind of implies meat when you hear it.
Yeah, it's it's it is the default on like it's just like okay,
yeah, technically peanut butter and jelly sandwich is a sandwich. But yeah,
you would just you never would ever, Nobody, if anyone ever thinks
of that as the default sandwich. They're psychotic like that is there's something wrong,
something's absolutely wrong with them. If they expected you bring back some type
of fucking nice turkey sandwich and then like, oh, I thought you were
gonna peanut butter and jelly, we can't be friends. It's the same way
I feel that. It's the same way I feel about It's the same way
I feel about chocolate candy. Where it's like if somebody comes home and they're
like, hey, I'm getting some candy and they come back with chocolate,
I'm gonna be like, I mean, I'm not disappointed, but like,
this is not what I expected. I expected like nerds, rope and fucking
airheads, and and that's that's what candy is to me, you know,
I guess I mean because people do say child, that's actually kind of similar.
It is similar. That is a similar, But I considered chocolate candy.
But like, at the same time, people specify they say chocolate when
they're bringing chocolates because my brain combines them both. They should, but I
would understand, I'm like, I'm going to bring back some candy, would
choco? Would you mind chocolate? That's what I would say, Yeah,
there is that further clarification that is needed. That's what. It's kind of
the same thing with peb and j to where it is that it's like,
yeah, the differentiating factor between chocolate and candy is that you wouldn't you don't
put candy in your breakfast, you know, like you can't have a NERD's
rope chip waffle or like an air air a glass of Airhead's milk. You
know, these are things that are like and it's the reason why you it's
the reason why you would see it's the reason why you see like fucking soua
patch Kids cereal and you're like, iw gross because it just doesn't it doesn't.
But Coco Puffs, Coco Puffs, you don't even blink. You don't
blink at these are these are separate categories in my in my mind, yeah,
motherfuckers will have though they'll have like fruity pebbles, though I'm like,
I don't get it, but you know, fruity Pebbles is on that line,
man, it's on that line, I like. But they are at
that point, they are at that shine where it's like this this this is
kind of candy it's pretty much candy. It's just like fucking fruit flavors and
it's sweet, and then they put in milk and it's to me, it
doesn't really mix that well with milk. I'm just like, that's the Chernobyl,
that's the Chernobyl zone of this conversation, where like the second it starts
getting into like fucking fruity pebbles, it's like, I don't hate fruity pebbles
at all, but like there is something, there's something about them where they're
really they're really pushing it. It's pushing. I like them better without milk.
Fruity pebbles and fruit loops or are cereals that I like to munch on
as a snack and not have milk in them. I just don't think milk
works well with that because it is kind of like a candy. It reminds
me of candy, and so I just don't and I don't whenever I get
nerds or anything that's like candy, I don't think of having a tall glass
of milk with it. It's just right, it's it's heinous in fact.
But yeah, all right, let's let's get the funk on. Oh yeah,
yeah, early. Yeah, that happened. Chris is Prirgerian, anal
dwelling vestigial twin wanting him to stop eating Chipotle. I don't eat Chipotle that
often really at all. Yeah, it's like a once every once in a
while thing, like right, it's like every once in a while Chipotle.
Yeah, it's just like yeah, every now and again, I'm like that
specific every now and again, I'm in the mood for that specific flavor profile
of burrito, you know where it's like, yeah, I can, I
can have this specific I always get like the chicken, the chicken, pinto
beans, white rice, fresh tomato, sausa, maybe some cheese on it.
Uh. And then a double wrap is usually yes, usually like what
I do. Sometimes I do double if I want like a real burrito,
Yeah, you go to a I know, I love rice. I'm just
I'm one. I'm one of those unlucky souls that people say soap but it
just tastes like not food to me, a cilantro, like, it doesn't
taste like food to me, And people say soap, but I don't really
get the soap thing, but it just doesn't. My tongue's like ooh food,
No, it ruins the rice, and I'm like, could you can
you niggas at least have some plain rice for me, for for the for
the for the other part of the population Like nah, not fuck you,
like we're like fucking bitch. I'm like, all right, wait what rice?
Don't you like? No, it's just it's their rice is cilantro on
lime. So since it has cilantio, I don't funk with it. Yeah,
doesn't matter if it's brown or white. They just don't have plain They're
not playing for bitch as people like me, They'll fine, it's good.
It's it, dude. I think arguably they have some of the best tortilla
chips. I think they're very good. They're really good tortilla chips. I
will say it like Chipotle is one of the Chipotle is one of the I
like the rice too. But the thing which they want to me, the
thing to me about Chipotle really is that like it really depends on when you
get if you catch it, when all of that ship is fresh, when
they just put out like a new bucket or like a new like thing of
everything, that ship is so good it's unreal. But you're very rarely ever
going to run into a situation where all of that stuff is equally fresh,
You're gonna be like, maybe the chicken is not not super fresh, with
the rice is maybe like this is kind of like been sitting out for a
while. Sometimes you'll get a fucking royal flush where everything is fucking stale and
that ruins everything. But that that handful of times where like you get it,
everything is fucking fresh, it's like it's it's pretty top in those moments.
It's top tier fast food. So the way that you can get that
is if you go but who does this? Most people don't it, But
if you have the privilege if you work at a specific time where your lunch
is early or whatever, because when it first opens, everything was just cooked
in a way that say, I I every once in a while, i'll
get Panda Express. It's right up the street from me, and they have
this honey sessime chicken. It's pretty much the only thing that I really like
from there, and they it's not made yet when I show up, so
like, hey, give me five minutes. It's fucking crunchy, hot as
fuck, like it'll burn your mouth, and I'm like, dude, this
is this is so much better than I ever fucking thought it would be.
This is incredible for me. Yeah, I'm picky. I like, I
like, I like, I like. I'm picky, But I like rice
a lot so fine in most places because I just prefer rice over every,
like, over literally everything. I just tho I want, I just I
just I get sluanchal on lime. Rice is amazing for a lot of people.
But it's just like I wish some things just they wouldn't, like,
hey, throw the ship in afterwards. Huh, you could have a fucking
I don't know, it's it's really just or at least just have an option
of not having that, because it fucks me. I can't get rice at
Chipotle, and it's like weird to me. They're like, this is crazy,
all right, she's not She's not pipping on my pippa cringe, gay
cum obunga homeless transfer who comes? You can lead, you can can you
lend an N word a pencil? I remember that letting Chunley rip my DNA
strands into pieces will be the base God asking Selma cash money for feet picks
on Twitter? Dead serious? I did see. Oh I remember that.
I remember. I totally remember that. I do remember that that guy is
so weird. Man, Like, that guy is such a freak. He's
been doing that for years, right when he follows like every person on Earth
essentially, like he follows so many people. He was great dude. Anyway,
anyway, we got we got my solace for a little bit. Joe
Biden's inner thoughts are dial up sounds. Fuck it, carry on with the
Britain slander. Shit sucks here, mister pants swing. I would greatly enjoy
it if I heard he got tack to you by Lillian Derek's wife with twelve
inchtra He's he's upping the inches on this every single time. I don't know,
man, he just inches spum befutters using the burning using this burning Koran
as a spell component, I cast earthquake at ninth level, targeting Turkey.
It's crazy, damn jolly old dipshit. Louis Armstrong first man to nut on
the moon. What a that's base that I would love to nut on the
moon. That'd be cool as fuck. You know, they're taking applications to
live on Mars, like say, yeah, you'll do like first, they'll
do trials of you living for a year in like a condition that's like Mars,
and then if you're good to go, then they'll send you to Mars
and it's gonna be a whole two year thing. So, uh you're gonna
be there and you're gonna basically be the Martian like that Matt Damon or whatever.
So Matt Damon, just yap is a hell of a drug. Propene
is a hellot I'll tell you what tofa laser pistol, ciphergraft that if Chunnley
had a penis, I would suck it vigorously. Same two mad six under
uh Uno dose gaze quatro sinco sinko gaze. Uh so stupid Thomas, I'm
not spiteful. Fuck you suck my dick Sweeney, Uh Dom, I'm squirting.
Get a glass. I want to see it. It's a matter of
time before he blows a load. When I thought it was time, I
caught it in my mouth. I sucked on. I sucked on eight long
cocks. I don't know what this is. Comes in Ivy Sweeney Superpowers being
confidently wrong. Back to tank of com caucases you container the crmell for gays,
Donald Trump burping on Dom's clit, Chris wearing earplugs to role play as
deaf and blind. That was me, man, this wasn't nice. In
Gump's voice, my Wiena has gone all big jed day. She pipped it
on my Pippa possum is the only empathetic person from Long Island. Soy chrismy
Gusta verdega, damn black dick, nice n nice. Maybe she drinks piss,
but at least she exists, now, that's true. Stephen Hawkings italicized
the jaw licking clad on Eppie Island. I'm going to hell, aren't I?
Yeah? You are, uh, just the hard r star coffee.
Calling cops pigs is an insult to the noble pig, the pig, I
would say, pigs are yeah, I mean pigs, that's something. The
fact that they're also delicious, which I don't feel like cops would be flattened
to death by Rhea Ripley's doja cat ass real rare. It was a huge
She's a thick uh ww wrestler on all this stupid ass makeup, you know,
but then when she takes it off, You're like, oh, she's
actually quite she's quite pleasant, you know, a normal person. I stop
really pretty not quite president A pretty lady dad exquisite. I stopped paying my
rent so I could be a real fan transferm Gremlin exposing people with nactose and
tongers the ninety million rodens of ionizing radiation. You not vin panagelic dam.
I want your loving even though we're both men, So please put your hand
down my pants. Bad romance. Uh bye, lady go I got Craig
the Canadian Richard Fist, get the kop food aboard it better. It's your
boys, shawnny d Ben and Jerry's Funky Monkey. I live in Philly and
everything you guys said is true. Also, I just saw a horse running
down nine ninety five by itself. Chef voice. You're listening to W ninety
eight point three smooth FM, the classiest station in DC. Next up is
shitt in the Woods by Mackelmore three x O inventing a new sectivis on where
you get seventy two five boys for blowing off the bathroom slurp and stroke and
smoking, joking and moons going like this. Lord of drip mh, Lord
of homeless drip, Dracula float dude with the neural link cut me off in
traffic. I took out my flipper zero and gave him gender dysphoria. Obi
won't sha blow me, Jackson Vernon, Norwegian game dev paying so Derek cares
Kremlin de Gremlin Himothy McVeigh. I'm gonna steal your bones. They were made
in a factory, a bomb factory. Going to like Kurt Cobaine myself with
comm Abbaye, Derek, your penis is out, sween be like, I
have a great imagination. Okay, Homo, imagine fucking a dude, imagine
sucking balls. I can't a sad guy, a sad guy from Michigan.
Can I get a Can I get a dick pic with your grace weatpants on
and one without them? Can I also get three picks of your dick in
any position? Also? The Papini brothers hold Derek's engraved glasses, Chris's audio
remote and swings Discord link for ransom. Dude, give me my fucking remote.
I have still not found it. I'm so annoyed by this man,
it makes me not want to like engage with my Yeah yeah, Donerson Doc
Doncorson uh installing a faulty neural link in Chris's head that plays thunder on repeat.
You gotta pay the trolls told to get into the boys hole Gage six.
The ancient Greeks knew it was never gay straight, but rather top bottom.
That's why breeding famboy bussy isn't gay. If it wasn't for the negative
connotation, sexual predator would be would be a bad hast title. True.
I know, I know what you mean. Yeah, that is it is
a It is a shame. It's a shame. It is that so that
sounds bad. It's like apex predator, but except for just what you have
to say it like Matt pet like I'm a sexual predator. He's not a
predator. He's a sexual predator. My name is Boof, and I'm a
sexual predator. It's like the cock so terrible cock ass cheeks sense what kind
of name is soap? Anyway? You some kind of muppet? Help fuck
and evil Lesbian Home Alone six, Enter the home Averse. Chris is a
secret pist drinker a ship so nice. I had it twice, John Strickland,
call me avatar. Are I'm on Roku watching watching watching a monkey asshole?
I don't I don't know what any of this means Merce eighteen eighty nine.
That's so dumb, Merce eighteen eighty nine. What do you mean not
tonight, Adrian. I'm a world class boxer. It's really not up to
you. Yo. God, Now that's a sexual predator right there. Now,
that's a sexual predator if I've ever seen one with a negative context.
That kid does that? President box? Adrian, you have, you don't
have much, say it's me Rocky. See you can't say no to me.
I'm Rocky. You don't have much, say, being very honest,
and then he pushes and then he pushes Adrian into hYP hydraulic press. See
you're dead now you didn't he said? He Oh my god, it's like
saying you don't have If I'm being very honest, I mean, I'm a
grown ass man. I can take what I want from you. I don't
have to see just because I have asoda drink head full of piss, does
it mean I'm not a fucking full grown adult that has the power to overtake
you. It overpower you with ease and trebidous pretty much, Polly, get
your mussy over here, saying I don't know out here. You got the
fun out of here? Rocky. You calm down. I'm mixed. I'm
making calm down. You gotta calm down now. I'm gonna gonna fuck you.
You guys, Please finish David here for thirty five minutes. Please,
We're so close to being done. First touch of Keiy David featuring King Charles,
the second with his unsightly Hasburg jog guzzling piss uh. The second Church
of Keith David featuring being better than the first touch of Key David pre raz
Blake eight nine to six Logan Paul has the WWE United States Championship for over
ninety days and it has defended fucking once. People really like asterix and obelisk
bruh. Really just a small junkie and a fat in some fat fuck I
don't know what any of this means. Uh uh getting laid for mispronouncing that
one African country. Damn a little dick rag. Little dick Rag lost my
job at Coles because they caught me playing with the mannequins boobs, the last
You and Oifield trash Texas Tato salad. Hey, guys, check this out.
I can't read that. I literally don't even know what the fuck that
says uh, Cock Cox ramming everything around me, crem everything around me.
Cream, get the money, nots ramming everything around me. Cream and that
bussy. Come on your face, Come, come on your face, Sue
Hulk, tickle my ass. Here is Nicky Ziggy, the Cream and your
Sister's pie. Wicked nine oh nine, Jackson DuPont, Badly Brave Hugger,
Derek duck Kunt, the Vegan Necromanser parentheses, I got consent etherean Brogerian punter,
Melpois won the anger. Iscotton Jeweling joined the view from d lee Plase
on the sixth floor, and as always, rounding out our list is the
King of Haphazard. Thank you all for listening to this episode of the snark
Tank podcast. We appreciate you. Come out over at patroon dot com,
slash the snark Tank support us over there, say come on over the stark
Tanks. The stark Tank Patreons say, well, well, fuck you.
Five dollars to get your questions right on the show twenty five to get your
names right. At the end of the show, there's a bunch of tears
in between. Uh. There's an extra Ammo episodes exclusive to the Patreon tiers,
so check those out. Uh, there should be new episodes there all
the time, so just pop on over there and give us a like on
Spotify. All that jazz, you know, the fucking drill. Get off
your homeless, lazy ass and help us. Stop pissing in my toast and
get me this money. Nigga. Alright, that's got it here.