WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.040 --> 00:00:03.240 Hello everyone, and welcome back to the podcast episode. My name is Alicia 2 00:00:03.240 --> 00:00:06.759 Gogain, the host of the Globe Secrets podcast, where I help you expand 3 00:00:06.799 --> 00:00:10.359 your mind and become more self awares that you can glow up into the best 4 00:00:10.400 --> 00:00:15.480 version of yourself. Hello, how are we doing? I'm not gonna say 5 00:00:15.480 --> 00:00:17.839 Happy Monday, because I don't know when this episode is going to come out. 6 00:00:18.039 --> 00:00:21.760 It is probably going to come out before Monday, because if you guys 7 00:00:21.800 --> 00:00:26.079 did not listen to the last episode, the entire thing, then clearly you 8 00:00:26.120 --> 00:00:29.519 just don't love me. I'm joking. The end of that episode, I 9 00:00:29.559 --> 00:00:34.200 said that I will be changing the schedule to post whenever I feel like it, 10 00:00:34.520 --> 00:00:39.840 because I feel like that's just how I create content, really, and 11 00:00:39.880 --> 00:00:43.640 so why not just edit and post the episode as soon as I can. 12 00:00:43.799 --> 00:00:49.000 So you might see some soporadic episodes here and there. Just know that you're 13 00:00:49.039 --> 00:00:51.719 going to get all the episodes that you need, make sure that you're following, 14 00:00:51.759 --> 00:00:55.479 make sure that you're subscribed, all the good stuff. But the ogs, 15 00:00:55.719 --> 00:00:58.159 you guys, will be here exactly when you need it. With that 16 00:00:58.280 --> 00:01:02.799 said, today's actually Monday that I'm record and it is July first, which 17 00:01:02.840 --> 00:01:06.319 I live in Canada, so Happy Canada Day, and I just have to 18 00:01:06.319 --> 00:01:07.840 say before we get into this episode, Okay, guys, I'm feeling so 19 00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:11.799 good about July. Okay, I'm feeling so good about it. I'm feeling 20 00:01:11.840 --> 00:01:15.079 so good about it. In terms of like the collective, I feel like 21 00:01:15.640 --> 00:01:21.400 the first six months of this year, like you know, we were getting 22 00:01:21.400 --> 00:01:23.640 out of the dumps a little bit. Okay, we had really good times. 23 00:01:23.640 --> 00:01:29.239 We had highs, we had some lows. But I feel like moving 24 00:01:29.280 --> 00:01:32.319 into the next six months, I feel like we are really tapped in. 25 00:01:32.640 --> 00:01:36.239 I feel like we have a better footing. We have like two feet on 26 00:01:36.280 --> 00:01:40.400 the ground, like we're ready to go. Not super quickly, but we're 27 00:01:40.439 --> 00:01:42.280 like in a good flow. I don't know, That's just how I'm feeling, 28 00:01:42.359 --> 00:01:46.680 and I would like to assume that's going to be how the six months 29 00:01:46.680 --> 00:01:49.000 will come, even though I'm sure there's going to be highs and lows because 30 00:01:49.040 --> 00:01:52.719 that is life. But we are resilient. Which is kind of bringing me 31 00:01:52.719 --> 00:01:57.480 into today's episode because listen, I've been seeing a lot of your guys' comments. 32 00:01:57.519 --> 00:02:00.519 Okay, you guys are very engaged, and y'all let me know what's 33 00:02:00.519 --> 00:02:05.760 going on and a lot of you guys always are struggling with facing fears. 34 00:02:05.840 --> 00:02:09.599 Afraid of failure, afraid of setting boundaries, afraid of being seen, afraid 35 00:02:09.639 --> 00:02:15.199 of a financial collapse, afraid, afraid, afraid. And I feel like 36 00:02:15.319 --> 00:02:19.639 I have a pretty good process that I sat down and really thought about when 37 00:02:19.680 --> 00:02:23.400 it comes to facing fears. Because I have fears as well, I have 38 00:02:23.479 --> 00:02:29.199 to face them. I have to continuously use this process on myself and the 39 00:02:29.240 --> 00:02:31.080 times that I feel like I'm, you know, getting in my own way, 40 00:02:31.240 --> 00:02:34.680 And I want to bring that to you guys, to give you guys 41 00:02:34.719 --> 00:02:37.000 some advice when it comes to facing your fears, because at the end of 42 00:02:37.000 --> 00:02:40.280 the day, we know our fears are the things that keep us stuck. 43 00:02:40.520 --> 00:02:44.879 That's it. You know. We are so on the pursuit of changing and 44 00:02:44.960 --> 00:02:50.360 up leveling and healing and manifesting in all these things, and what happens in 45 00:02:50.400 --> 00:02:54.680 the process of us wanting to evolve is these things get in the way, 46 00:02:54.719 --> 00:03:00.240 which are our fears. We're afraid, we don't know, we sabotage, 47 00:03:00.400 --> 00:03:05.520 we take the freaking longest road to actually get exactly where we need to go. 48 00:03:06.400 --> 00:03:09.639 And I want to give you guys some mindset shifts and hopefully this can 49 00:03:09.719 --> 00:03:15.879 help you when it comes to facing fears in your life. Now, fears 50 00:03:15.919 --> 00:03:20.000 are very complex, Okay, So I'm gonna give you advice based off of 51 00:03:20.599 --> 00:03:25.240 what I have applied in my own life. But understand that the information that 52 00:03:25.280 --> 00:03:29.680 you get, whether it's from me or anyone online or in a textbook or 53 00:03:29.719 --> 00:03:32.599 at school or anything on paper, whatever, even if it's not on paper, 54 00:03:34.439 --> 00:03:38.080 it's gonna translate a little bit differently in real life, meaning there are 55 00:03:38.240 --> 00:03:39.960 nuances you are gonna have to go into the world. You're gonna have to 56 00:03:40.039 --> 00:03:44.599 try. You're going to find what works for you. You're gonna see that 57 00:03:44.599 --> 00:03:46.319 that maybe piece of advice over there didn't work, this that and the third 58 00:03:46.479 --> 00:03:50.719 or when you're taking an information and you're trying to use this to help you 59 00:03:50.800 --> 00:03:58.319 up level your life, understand that you applying knowledge or advice or whatever, 60 00:03:58.800 --> 00:04:01.919 it's probably not gonna be a seamless, flawless process, and you need to 61 00:04:01.960 --> 00:04:05.599 really discern what works for you and what doesn't. And I'm gonna be reading 62 00:04:05.639 --> 00:04:11.000 out some of your guys's fears to give you a perspective based off of the 63 00:04:11.039 --> 00:04:15.199 process that I usually use when it comes to facing fears hopefully to help you 64 00:04:15.240 --> 00:04:19.279 guys. You guys gave me a lot of fears, and I'm not gonna 65 00:04:19.279 --> 00:04:23.519 be able to read through all of them, but I compiled a lot that 66 00:04:23.560 --> 00:04:27.720 I feel like are pretty common amongst everyone, So we're gonna go through all 67 00:04:27.720 --> 00:04:30.560 of that as well. But I just wanted to disclaim that because I really 68 00:04:30.600 --> 00:04:36.000 want you to understand that the first step of you, honestly even facing fears, 69 00:04:36.360 --> 00:04:42.000 but getting the things you want in your life and transforming really starts with 70 00:04:42.199 --> 00:04:46.199 you taking your personal power back and deciding what works for you in your life 71 00:04:46.240 --> 00:04:50.720 and what advice or what knowledge you want to implement in your life or not. 72 00:04:51.120 --> 00:04:56.839 So let's talk about my two step process and what I mean steps in 73 00:04:56.879 --> 00:05:00.079 real life. The way this translates is not, Okay, I have a 74 00:05:00.120 --> 00:05:02.680 fear, I'm going to think this way and then think this way, and 75 00:05:02.720 --> 00:05:04.839 then all of a sudden, the fear is going to go away. This 76 00:05:04.920 --> 00:05:09.279 is what I mean real life happens. You're an emotional being. You have 77 00:05:09.360 --> 00:05:12.759 deep rooted fears from childhood, which I want to talk about really at the 78 00:05:12.839 --> 00:05:16.519 end of this episode, so that you don't feel like you are set up 79 00:05:16.560 --> 00:05:21.720 to fail in your life when you attain this certain process or knowledge in your 80 00:05:21.720 --> 00:05:25.759 life and you try and implement it and then it doesn't work. To understand 81 00:05:25.839 --> 00:05:29.399 that there are so many nuances to you as a human being. But I 82 00:05:29.439 --> 00:05:31.839 do want to bring your awareness to two things that are so important. When 83 00:05:31.879 --> 00:05:39.120 you find you are stuck in your life due to a fear, you're afraid 84 00:05:39.120 --> 00:05:42.720 of being seen, You're afraid of setting a boundary. You're afraid that the 85 00:05:42.720 --> 00:05:46.759 world is going to collapse. The reason why this fear is making you so 86 00:05:46.800 --> 00:05:51.680 stagnant in life and it's causing such an issue for you to go, you 87 00:05:51.720 --> 00:05:55.920 know, follow your dreams or whatever it is, even if it's in relationships, 88 00:05:55.959 --> 00:06:00.199 whatever it is, is really the fact that you are afraid of of 89 00:06:00.399 --> 00:06:04.560 the outcome if you do fail. You have not learned how to be resilient 90 00:06:04.720 --> 00:06:12.399 in moments where the outcome is not essentially what you wanted. Now, this 91 00:06:12.519 --> 00:06:16.160 is not something that we want to even face. Obviously. Let's say somebody 92 00:06:16.560 --> 00:06:20.040 does disappoint us if we go for love and it turns out to be a 93 00:06:20.079 --> 00:06:24.839 complete failure, or we do put ourselves on social media and we don't see 94 00:06:24.879 --> 00:06:28.160 the results that we want, or we tell somebody how much we really like 95 00:06:28.199 --> 00:06:30.839 them and they reject us, or we do something with business and it just 96 00:06:30.879 --> 00:06:34.360 doesn't work out. Obviously, those are not things that we want to deal 97 00:06:34.399 --> 00:06:40.240 with. But the reason why you are always getting in your own way and 98 00:06:40.800 --> 00:06:43.839 you don't go for the things that you know you need to go for, 99 00:06:44.000 --> 00:06:46.720 is because you have not learned how to be okay with that disappointment, that 100 00:06:46.839 --> 00:06:51.879 rejection, that oh my gosh, what am I actually gonna do if this 101 00:06:51.920 --> 00:06:55.720 thing doesn't work out? And this is what I want you to focus on. 102 00:06:55.839 --> 00:06:58.240 I want you to focus when you have a fear in your life to 103 00:06:58.360 --> 00:07:02.959 take its power away. You give this fear so much power. Now, 104 00:07:03.079 --> 00:07:08.920 it is understandable why you would give something such as disappointment or rejection a lot 105 00:07:08.920 --> 00:07:13.480 of power. But the reason why you're really doing that is because the feeling 106 00:07:13.560 --> 00:07:17.959 that it creates within you disappointment and rejection, let's say, is something like 107 00:07:18.000 --> 00:07:23.800 I already said that sometimes you've not actually learned how to be with that emotion. 108 00:07:24.519 --> 00:07:29.680 But you might have felt that before. Usually it's in childhood and it 109 00:07:29.759 --> 00:07:32.839 wasn't a good experience for you. You never learned how to be with that. 110 00:07:32.959 --> 00:07:40.120 You weren't around somebody who made it okay to even be disappointing at some 111 00:07:40.199 --> 00:07:44.199 points in your life, or maybe you didn't have the support that you needed 112 00:07:44.240 --> 00:07:47.720 and the times that you did get rejected, there are these big emotions and 113 00:07:47.759 --> 00:07:54.199 feelings that are really behind these fears that you have that you are running away 114 00:07:54.240 --> 00:07:58.600 from because you've not either learned how to deal with it or you've just given 115 00:07:58.639 --> 00:08:03.600 it so much power. As if if you can't be resilient when it comes 116 00:08:03.600 --> 00:08:09.199 to being rejected, like you can't pick yourself back up after things didn't work 117 00:08:09.240 --> 00:08:13.120 out a certain way, Yes you can, and I need you to have 118 00:08:13.160 --> 00:08:16.800 that energy when it comes to anything that you're afraid of. I want you 119 00:08:16.839 --> 00:08:20.319 to think about, Okay, you know what, Will I be okay if 120 00:08:20.439 --> 00:08:26.000 this person rejects me? Will I be okay if this business doesn't work out? 121 00:08:26.279 --> 00:08:31.920 Now your first thought, your first emotion is probably no because it's so 122 00:08:31.200 --> 00:08:37.120 scary. But the truth is if you bring in that logical part of you, 123 00:08:37.919 --> 00:08:39.919 yes you are going to be okay. So it's really good to see 124 00:08:41.639 --> 00:08:46.000 what emotion are you actually afraid of? What outcomes specifically for your specific fear 125 00:08:46.000 --> 00:08:50.559 that you currently have right now, are you afraid of and how can I 126 00:08:50.639 --> 00:08:54.799 take my personal power back, which is the second part of this process, 127 00:08:54.879 --> 00:09:01.240 which is reframing to a positive outcome aka rational optimism. Now, let me 128 00:09:01.320 --> 00:09:03.720 quickly read a definition so you guys can understand it more. And you guys 129 00:09:03.759 --> 00:09:07.759 are going to see how this process can be applied to a lot of different 130 00:09:07.840 --> 00:09:13.799 examples when I read your guys' fears that you guys submitted. So rational optimism 131 00:09:13.919 --> 00:09:16.519 is the practice of taking realistic assessment of what is going on in the world 132 00:09:16.799 --> 00:09:22.799 and choosing to be positive and joyful regardless. This does not mean we ignore 133 00:09:22.840 --> 00:09:26.639 the obvious, putting our hands in the sand, or seeing everything through rose 134 00:09:26.679 --> 00:09:31.799 colored glasses. So when I find myself overthinking, analyzing, staying small in 135 00:09:31.879 --> 00:09:37.759 my life, I like to see what is the worst possible case of this 136 00:09:37.840 --> 00:09:43.960 thing actually manifesting in not my favor, And will I actually be okay if 137 00:09:45.000 --> 00:09:50.639 this thing does manifest And it might be scary, but the truth is yes, 138 00:09:50.759 --> 00:09:54.320 I will if I have a goal of getting out there in the dating 139 00:09:54.320 --> 00:09:56.960 world, if I really want to find the love of my life. But 140 00:09:58.080 --> 00:10:01.559 I am afraid because I I want to be rejected. I don't want to 141 00:10:01.559 --> 00:10:03.759 get hurt again. I don't want someone to make fun of me for the 142 00:10:03.759 --> 00:10:07.559 way that I look. Whatever it is, The first thing I'm going to 143 00:10:07.600 --> 00:10:11.799 do is think about how can I lessen its power? Right now? How 144 00:10:11.799 --> 00:10:15.440 can I lessen my fear's power? How can I take my power back? 145 00:10:15.799 --> 00:10:18.759 Well, I have to think if I do get rejected by this person, 146 00:10:20.000 --> 00:10:26.000 if they do somehow do me dirty or break my heart? Will it hurt? 147 00:10:26.919 --> 00:10:30.919 Yes, it probably will hurt. Will it be uncomfortable, Yes, 148 00:10:30.960 --> 00:10:33.200 it probably will be uncomfortable. Will I be disappointed? Yes I will. 149 00:10:33.279 --> 00:10:37.559 Am I allowed to be disappointed? Am I allowed to be hurt? Yes? 150 00:10:37.759 --> 00:10:41.720 I am? This is rational, okay, Yes, the truth is 151 00:10:41.759 --> 00:10:46.240 that outcome might not be the best thing, but optimistic This is the second 152 00:10:46.240 --> 00:10:50.919 half of this. Will I be okay? Could I find love again even 153 00:10:50.000 --> 00:10:54.440 after heartbreak? The answer is yes. And when I am in the midst 154 00:10:54.519 --> 00:11:00.360 of an actual fear or I'm overthinking something, I really go back back and 155 00:11:00.399 --> 00:11:03.480 forth within this process of thinking, okay, Well, will I be okay 156 00:11:03.519 --> 00:11:07.320 if this thing manifests? The answer is yes. And this is why this 157 00:11:07.360 --> 00:11:13.320 is what would happen if this thing does manifest, And persisting in the belief 158 00:11:13.440 --> 00:11:16.840 that things will work out even if it doesn't go exactly the way that I 159 00:11:16.879 --> 00:11:20.639 want to. So there's not a point on me stalling. There's not a 160 00:11:20.679 --> 00:11:26.799 point in me overthinking. There's not a point on me living out this stagnant 161 00:11:26.919 --> 00:11:31.399 energy in my life just because I'm afraid of the outcome. I am strong, 162 00:11:31.759 --> 00:11:33.559 I can deal with the outcome, and I think this is something that 163 00:11:33.600 --> 00:11:37.799 you guys just need to remind yourself more of. This is something I needed 164 00:11:37.799 --> 00:11:41.759 to do with many things in my life. Even when it comes to leaving 165 00:11:41.799 --> 00:11:46.960 my job my quote unquote like a corporate regular job for social media. Everyone 166 00:11:46.000 --> 00:11:48.279 says, oh, I don't know, this is who knows? Da da 167 00:11:48.360 --> 00:11:52.039 da, Well, guess what I would rather go for my dreams than sit 168 00:11:52.080 --> 00:11:58.000 around and have this desire to do something but live my life the entire time 169 00:11:58.080 --> 00:12:01.240 not doing it and be super miss role and a job that I hated. 170 00:12:01.799 --> 00:12:05.039 Could there be a risk involve of me leaving and doing what like pursuing social 171 00:12:05.080 --> 00:12:07.879 media? Yes, but guess what will I be? Okay, let me 172 00:12:07.960 --> 00:12:11.159 think about it for a second. Yes I will. We don't also need 173 00:12:11.200 --> 00:12:13.919 to be delusional about the fact that, Okay, well, if it doesn't 174 00:12:13.960 --> 00:12:16.960 work out, this is how your life will look if it doesn't plan out, 175 00:12:18.279 --> 00:12:20.080 but the end of the day, I always come back to optimism. 176 00:12:20.440 --> 00:12:24.679 Well, I'll pick myself back up, even if there's a downfall. I'm 177 00:12:24.720 --> 00:12:28.000 gonna pick myself back up. What else am I going to do? What 178 00:12:28.159 --> 00:12:31.600 other option? And I adopted this mindset very young in my life. And 179 00:12:31.639 --> 00:12:37.039 I think that you tend to do this when you have no other choice and 180 00:12:37.120 --> 00:12:41.720 nobody is saving your ass. You have no other option but to become rationally 181 00:12:41.759 --> 00:12:46.519 optimistic about your life because you have to be optimistic and you have to believe 182 00:12:46.559 --> 00:12:52.200 that something is possible for you or you're not really gonna save yourself from the 183 00:12:52.240 --> 00:12:56.399 situation at hand. And I needed to save myself in situations a lot in 184 00:12:56.440 --> 00:13:00.000 my life. But of course I had to be rational at the same time. 185 00:13:00.159 --> 00:13:01.559 So I had to play out what would happen, and I had to 186 00:13:01.600 --> 00:13:05.519 think about, Okay, well, this is what I'll do if this doesn't 187 00:13:05.519 --> 00:13:07.279 work out, or this is how I'll move through life if this doesn't work 188 00:13:07.279 --> 00:13:09.679 out. Now, I know a lot of you guys kind of know this. 189 00:13:09.799 --> 00:13:13.120 You know this reframe of okay, Well, if it does pan out, 190 00:13:13.960 --> 00:13:18.000 yeah, I will be okay. But the problem is there's a few 191 00:13:18.000 --> 00:13:20.840 problems. One of it is that it runs really deep, so you have 192 00:13:20.960 --> 00:13:24.799 that deep level of being really afraid of the emotion that's with underneath, which 193 00:13:26.080 --> 00:13:28.840 I would highly suggest you potentially get my book or even look at my journal 194 00:13:28.879 --> 00:13:33.559 guides when it comes to your fears, because this is very deep rooted. 195 00:13:33.600 --> 00:13:39.039 And if you haven't had a lot of practice with actually being in the energy 196 00:13:39.120 --> 00:13:43.080 of disappointment or being afraid because of your childhood, because you never learned how 197 00:13:43.080 --> 00:13:46.519 to deal with it, that's important for you to kind of explore that. 198 00:13:46.840 --> 00:13:50.159 But the other side of this is you move through life not leaning on the 199 00:13:50.240 --> 00:13:56.240 scale of optimism. You are so trained and you are so addicted to being 200 00:13:56.240 --> 00:14:00.440 a pessimist. You're so addicted to being like, oh, okay, yeah, 201 00:14:00.440 --> 00:14:03.080 maybe it could work out, but it probably won't. Yes, I 202 00:14:03.080 --> 00:14:05.639 see the option where it could work out, but that's just one in a 203 00:14:05.679 --> 00:14:07.879 million. Oh it happened for them, but it's not gonna happen for me. 204 00:14:09.000 --> 00:14:11.799 You're so on the side of being a pessimist, and I want you 205 00:14:11.879 --> 00:14:15.799 to ask yourself the question, how is that serving you? How is being 206 00:14:15.840 --> 00:14:18.919 a pessimist serving you? As much as you cry and you say that you 207 00:14:18.960 --> 00:14:22.080 don't want to have these fears, and you don't want to be stuck in 208 00:14:22.120 --> 00:14:26.120 your life. You being stuck in your life and you not going for the 209 00:14:26.159 --> 00:14:28.639 things that you want in your life. It is serving you in some way, 210 00:14:28.720 --> 00:14:31.279 It is keeping you comfortable in some way, and a lot of the 211 00:14:31.279 --> 00:14:39.720 times it's survival from actually facing the real fear of actual disappointment or actual rejection 212 00:14:39.919 --> 00:14:43.559 because you felt it once in childhood, or you felt it around somebody where 213 00:14:43.639 --> 00:14:46.639 it hurt so bad you didn't know how to deal with it. Nobody was 214 00:14:46.679 --> 00:14:48.879 around you to support you. No one was there to coddle you, no 215 00:14:48.879 --> 00:14:52.279 one was there to help you understand that you are going to be okay even 216 00:14:52.360 --> 00:14:56.159 if you feel that disappointment or rejection. That is what you're running away from. 217 00:14:56.200 --> 00:15:00.840 And that is what you need to run directly too, because what you 218 00:15:00.879 --> 00:15:03.000 will do if you do not do that, if you do not know how 219 00:15:03.000 --> 00:15:05.440 to learn how to be with your emotions and be with yourself and carry yourself 220 00:15:05.600 --> 00:15:09.399 through the times where yes, things can be hard, you will stay stuck 221 00:15:09.440 --> 00:15:13.240 for the rest of your life and you will be running away from yourself all 222 00:15:13.279 --> 00:15:16.240 of your life. And that is what everyone is doing. By the way, 223 00:15:16.279 --> 00:15:18.679 in their lives. This is the human condition. This is what we 224 00:15:18.720 --> 00:15:20.720 do. We run away from the things that we fear the most because we 225 00:15:20.759 --> 00:15:24.519 have not learned how to actually be with that thing. So the thing that 226 00:15:24.559 --> 00:15:28.720 you're actually running away from is always the thing you want to run right head 227 00:15:28.759 --> 00:15:31.039 too. Now, this is no easy task. This is no easy task 228 00:15:31.039 --> 00:15:35.960 when you have a part of you that's like, excuse me, this is 229 00:15:35.960 --> 00:15:39.399 not comfortable. I'd rather go do a million other things than to go run 230 00:15:39.480 --> 00:15:41.480 right into that emotion. But this is what I talk about all the time. 231 00:15:41.600 --> 00:15:43.840 I've written about it in my book. This is what I'm always doing 232 00:15:43.879 --> 00:15:48.519 within my own life. When I feel something, when I feel afraid, 233 00:15:48.960 --> 00:15:50.679 when I feel sad, when I feel nervous, when I feel like I 234 00:15:50.720 --> 00:15:56.960 don't know what is going on, I sit in that, I allow myself 235 00:15:56.039 --> 00:16:00.440 to feel. I write it out in my journal. What am I feeling 236 00:16:00.440 --> 00:16:03.799 today? What does my inner child need me to hear? What does my 237 00:16:03.879 --> 00:16:07.639 inner child need me to hold her in? Right now? And this is 238 00:16:07.679 --> 00:16:12.279 not something that we're usually taught. We are taught to suppress, not important, 239 00:16:12.879 --> 00:16:17.440 put your feelings to a side, forget about it, and go, 240 00:16:17.559 --> 00:16:19.360 well, guess what that does not work, and I have learned in my 241 00:16:19.480 --> 00:16:25.000 life, especially from my father, do not cry, Do not be afraid. 242 00:16:25.480 --> 00:16:27.080 You're not allowed to be afraid. But guess where that got me. 243 00:16:27.240 --> 00:16:32.159 It got me in this rat race of running around and not doing the things 244 00:16:32.200 --> 00:16:34.480 that I really wanted to do in my life because I was so afraid of 245 00:16:34.519 --> 00:16:38.679 the emotion that would come from the fear of it actually manifesting. But once 246 00:16:38.720 --> 00:16:42.440 I got so good at facing that reality of you know what, if it 247 00:16:42.480 --> 00:16:47.440 does manifest, if I do get rejected from this person, if this person 248 00:16:47.480 --> 00:16:51.240 does not like me, if this opportunity doesn't work out, if this money 249 00:16:51.240 --> 00:16:52.840 doesn't come through, I'm gonna be okay. You know why, because I 250 00:16:52.960 --> 00:16:56.759 got me the way that nobody got me when I was younger. I'm going 251 00:16:56.799 --> 00:17:00.960 to be there for myself the way nobody was when I first got rejected in 252 00:17:02.000 --> 00:17:04.319 my life, when I first got disappointed by my parents not showing up for 253 00:17:04.440 --> 00:17:07.160 me, when I first felt that heartbreak, and I didn't know what to 254 00:17:07.200 --> 00:17:10.319 do, when I was running to the wrong people, or I was, 255 00:17:10.599 --> 00:17:15.079 you know, suppressing my emotions. Now in my life, I got me. 256 00:17:15.319 --> 00:17:18.200 But once you learn how to face your emotions head on, that is 257 00:17:18.240 --> 00:17:22.039 when the game changes. That is when you can stop yourself in the moment 258 00:17:22.039 --> 00:17:26.319 when you're overthinking something or you're about to stop yourself because you have that fear 259 00:17:26.319 --> 00:17:27.680 and you say, you know what I could be with myself and that emotion. 260 00:17:27.839 --> 00:17:30.559 If it happens, it is not going to be easy. I am 261 00:17:30.559 --> 00:17:33.839 not saying that this is a nice ride when it happens, but I can 262 00:17:33.880 --> 00:17:37.359 do that. And how you get good at feeling the confidence to be able 263 00:17:37.440 --> 00:17:42.720 to face that emotion or that fear is your everyday life. You stop ignoring 264 00:17:44.039 --> 00:17:48.920 your feelings, you stop ignoring what is truly happening within yourself. You don't 265 00:17:48.920 --> 00:17:52.599 feel good today, let it out. You need to express something, Express 266 00:17:52.640 --> 00:17:55.400 it to yourself, express it in your journal, express it to the people 267 00:17:55.400 --> 00:17:59.200 that you need to express it too. And this takes practice. This takes 268 00:17:59.319 --> 00:18:03.200 every day up for yourself. And what I'm really saying is I want to 269 00:18:03.279 --> 00:18:07.319 be there for my inner child that's feeling that emotion, and I am no 270 00:18:07.440 --> 00:18:12.440 longer going to run away from her when she feels those emotions when real things 271 00:18:12.480 --> 00:18:17.079 happen in her life, because that is exactly why I'm so afraid in the 272 00:18:17.119 --> 00:18:21.720 first place. Is that young part of me experience that hurt and that pain 273 00:18:21.799 --> 00:18:25.240 once in her life, and she did not have somebody stand up for her. 274 00:18:25.279 --> 00:18:27.160 She did not have somebody be there for her. She did not have 275 00:18:27.240 --> 00:18:30.640 somebody hold her and tell her she was going to be okay even through the 276 00:18:30.680 --> 00:18:34.559 hardest moments of her life. But no more. And you need to understand 277 00:18:34.599 --> 00:18:38.559 that young version of yourself is still in you today when you are about to 278 00:18:38.640 --> 00:18:42.400 face a fear, when you are wanting something so desperately in your life, 279 00:18:42.400 --> 00:18:45.319 but you're so afraid to go for it. So let me read out some 280 00:18:45.359 --> 00:18:48.359 of your guys' fear. I'm going to help you take its power away as 281 00:18:48.440 --> 00:18:52.839 much as I can and help you reframe it, and any other advice or 282 00:18:52.920 --> 00:18:55.279 things that I come up with, I will give you. And again this 283 00:18:55.440 --> 00:18:56.720 is just my own advice, and I think what I'm going to do is 284 00:18:56.880 --> 00:19:03.240 actually read it as if I was experiencing the fear, And honestly, I've 285 00:19:03.279 --> 00:19:06.240 been through a lot of these fears, so I'm just speaking out of personal 286 00:19:06.279 --> 00:19:08.440 experience. Like I just said, Okay, so someone said they have a 287 00:19:08.440 --> 00:19:12.759 fear of not getting into graduate school. The first thing that I always like 288 00:19:12.839 --> 00:19:15.640 to do, which I've basically been saying, and I really want you to 289 00:19:15.640 --> 00:19:18.279 think about this when it comes to any fear that you have and any of 290 00:19:18.319 --> 00:19:23.119 the questions that I'm answering, is what are you actually afraid of? Because 291 00:19:23.119 --> 00:19:30.319 you're not afraid of not getting into grad school. You're afraid of probably disappointing 292 00:19:30.359 --> 00:19:34.799 people. You're afraid of not being successful in your life, which means what 293 00:19:34.799 --> 00:19:38.400 what does that mean? If you're not successful in your life? It means 294 00:19:38.480 --> 00:19:42.119 that you don't have a roof over your head. It means that you're going 295 00:19:42.200 --> 00:19:45.119 to be a disappointment to your parent, It means that you're not going to 296 00:19:45.160 --> 00:19:48.400 find the love of your life. It means that whatever it is, I 297 00:19:48.400 --> 00:19:53.640 want you to really get down to what you are actually afraid of and what 298 00:19:53.720 --> 00:19:57.400 I like to do when I get to the root of what it is I'm 299 00:19:57.440 --> 00:20:02.839 actually afraid of. This is a great time to have a journal practice with 300 00:20:02.920 --> 00:20:07.759 that young part of you that is actually feeling that. And you could read 301 00:20:07.799 --> 00:20:11.720 my book and learn a little bit about parts work, because I do talk 302 00:20:11.759 --> 00:20:14.519 about parts work in my book, or you can get the book No Bad 303 00:20:14.559 --> 00:20:18.119 Parts by Richard Schwartz. This really dives into those parts of you that are 304 00:20:18.200 --> 00:20:22.000 very young. Maybe they're even older, but they tend to be pretty young 305 00:20:22.039 --> 00:20:26.920 that maybe they're holding onto an experience once where you actually felt real rejection or 306 00:20:26.960 --> 00:20:30.079 you felt disappointment or something, and you can kind of bring your consciousness to 307 00:20:30.119 --> 00:20:33.799 that specific area of your life and you can kind of a journal from that 308 00:20:33.920 --> 00:20:38.119 place, allow your inner child to speak and whatever it needs to say, 309 00:20:38.240 --> 00:20:42.000 like I'm afraid of this happening again, or you know, what were some 310 00:20:42.079 --> 00:20:45.759 affirmations that you actually needed in that moment, like what was really going on 311 00:20:45.880 --> 00:20:51.160 there? Really getting to that root of it and allowing that emotion to be 312 00:20:51.319 --> 00:20:55.200 expressed, like yes, there's probably one point in your life that you maybe 313 00:20:55.240 --> 00:20:59.799 disappointed your parent and they reacted in a bad way and you felt so ashamed 314 00:20:59.880 --> 00:21:03.160 or you felt embarrassed, and now you are protecting yourself from ever feeling that 315 00:21:03.240 --> 00:21:07.640 again. And maybe that situation your parent didn't even know that, or your 316 00:21:07.680 --> 00:21:11.599 parent actually didn't mean harm, but your young part of you does not know 317 00:21:11.680 --> 00:21:15.559 that until you get into the root of that feeling. There are just certain 318 00:21:15.599 --> 00:21:18.799 things that your part is going to need to hear from you uniquely that I 319 00:21:18.880 --> 00:21:25.119 can't even fully give you because I don't exactly know what that pinpoint emotion really 320 00:21:25.279 --> 00:21:27.319 is. But spending some time with that part of you is very, very 321 00:21:27.440 --> 00:21:30.559 huge because if not, most likely you're just going to keep going through life 322 00:21:30.559 --> 00:21:33.720 with the same fear unless you kind of go a little bit deeper. And 323 00:21:33.799 --> 00:21:40.440 then the second part of this is reframing this right just being very rationally optimistic, 324 00:21:40.519 --> 00:21:42.519 so you are afraid of not getting into graduate school. And this is 325 00:21:42.640 --> 00:21:48.880 now my real subjective advice or perspective of what I would tell myself and honestly 326 00:21:48.920 --> 00:21:52.759 things that I kind of did when it came to my college experience. I 327 00:21:52.799 --> 00:21:56.519 didn't ever get rejected from a place, but there are times where I needed 328 00:21:56.519 --> 00:21:59.400 to take some time off to figure out what I wanted to do. So 329 00:21:59.559 --> 00:22:02.039 when things would not work out, I would do a few things. I 330 00:22:02.079 --> 00:22:06.240 would want to assess why I didn't get in. Is there something that I 331 00:22:06.319 --> 00:22:10.519 need to work on, whether it's like my grades, or maybe is it 332 00:22:10.559 --> 00:22:12.759 this actual school that I want? Like, I would really assess the situation 333 00:22:12.799 --> 00:22:18.640 as to what needs to be changed so that I can reapply and actually make 334 00:22:18.680 --> 00:22:21.880 it. If I was fully rejected from let's say, all my schools and 335 00:22:21.920 --> 00:22:25.440 there wasn't really a chance of me going this year. I would take this 336 00:22:25.480 --> 00:22:29.839 as an opportunity to work on any academics that I need to be working on. 337 00:22:29.920 --> 00:22:32.759 During the summer, I would be getting a job to make sure that 338 00:22:32.759 --> 00:22:37.720 I'm saving money. I would really capitalize on this time that I have before 339 00:22:37.759 --> 00:22:41.079 I have to go back into school for how many years. I would really 340 00:22:41.119 --> 00:22:45.519 look at the positives of this situation. And I know the first thing you 341 00:22:45.599 --> 00:22:48.799 want is to get in. But you have to be that rational optimist in 342 00:22:48.839 --> 00:22:52.559 these times where things are not working out, because the truth is if you 343 00:22:52.640 --> 00:22:56.359 want to and this is more so like manifesting. So if you don't believe 344 00:22:56.359 --> 00:22:59.440 in this, this is fine. But I think that even if you're religious, 345 00:22:59.519 --> 00:23:02.759 you can kind of think about it in the sense of things are working 346 00:23:02.759 --> 00:23:04.680 out for you even if you do not see it right now. There is 347 00:23:04.720 --> 00:23:10.759 a reason why this is happening. So stay positive, stay in this energy 348 00:23:10.839 --> 00:23:14.880 of working on yourself and preparing yourself for the time that it comes that you 349 00:23:14.960 --> 00:23:18.960 are going to go to graduate school. Having that mindset is going to get 350 00:23:18.000 --> 00:23:21.799 you way farther than you being like, my life is over, my life 351 00:23:21.799 --> 00:23:22.599 is over, My life is over. My life is over. Because what 352 00:23:22.640 --> 00:23:26.480 are you going to do? Your habits are going to follow that mindset, 353 00:23:26.519 --> 00:23:30.519 which are probably not going to prepare you the best you possibly could for when 354 00:23:30.559 --> 00:23:36.000 it comes time for you to reapply or for some reason something changes in your 355 00:23:36.000 --> 00:23:40.160 life. And like I said about manifestation, you tend to manifest things based 356 00:23:40.200 --> 00:23:44.160 off of what you're thinking and how you're moving through life. So you want 357 00:23:44.160 --> 00:23:47.519 to be thinking good thoughts, you want to be expecting good outcomes, and 358 00:23:47.599 --> 00:23:49.880 you want to be aligned, meaning you want to pour back into yourself. 359 00:23:51.279 --> 00:23:53.480 Things will change, and this is the mindset that you want to have when 360 00:23:53.559 --> 00:23:59.200 it comes to taking your fears power away. Right, So if you are 361 00:23:59.240 --> 00:24:03.359 afraid of getting into graduate school, have this type of mindset. When you 362 00:24:03.440 --> 00:24:07.559 have this type of mindset, you're going to find that your fear lessons because 363 00:24:07.920 --> 00:24:11.400 you know, well, okay, if I don't get in, this is 364 00:24:11.440 --> 00:24:14.960 my second option, and it seems like a great option over here too. 365 00:24:15.440 --> 00:24:18.799 So I'm going to be good and you will find your fears lesson. And 366 00:24:18.960 --> 00:24:22.079 in my personal opinion, you manifest a lot of your fears when you continuously 367 00:24:22.119 --> 00:24:26.119 think about it. So it's so good that you reframe the things that you 368 00:24:26.160 --> 00:24:30.079 are afraid of so that you don't keep inviting it more into your life. 369 00:24:30.160 --> 00:24:33.839 Someone said they have a fear of being rude. When I'm really just implementing 370 00:24:33.839 --> 00:24:40.119 my boundaries with my family, I would say, can you hold space for 371 00:24:40.200 --> 00:24:45.480 them thinking that you are rude? Because I think that that's what you're pushing 372 00:24:45.519 --> 00:24:48.640 against right now when you're wanting to hold up boundaries when it comes to family 373 00:24:48.759 --> 00:24:52.839 or even friends, what you're really afraid of, Again, this is very 374 00:24:52.880 --> 00:25:00.079 blanket, but especially in this example, you're afraid of them looking at you 375 00:25:00.720 --> 00:25:04.640 as rude. Okay, so what if they do? Can you be okay 376 00:25:04.640 --> 00:25:07.400 with that? Can you be okay with the fact that not everyone's going to 377 00:25:07.559 --> 00:25:11.440 like you? No, you can't. That's why you have this fear. 378 00:25:11.599 --> 00:25:15.839 So it's about being comfortable with the fact that not everyone's going to like you. 379 00:25:15.000 --> 00:25:18.759 And then what follows is will you be okay if not everyone likes you? 380 00:25:19.160 --> 00:25:22.599 And your first visceral response will probably be no, oh my god, 381 00:25:22.599 --> 00:25:26.599 oh my god, oh my god. But really that is rooted probably back 382 00:25:26.640 --> 00:25:33.640 somewhere in childhood, but also is that the actual reality of your life right 383 00:25:33.680 --> 00:25:37.759 now? Will you not be okay if that person down the street judges you 384 00:25:37.920 --> 00:25:42.359 or your family member? No, longer likes you, rejects you, feels 385 00:25:42.359 --> 00:25:47.960 disappointed from you. The rational truth of that is you will be okay, 386 00:25:48.759 --> 00:25:52.400 but you just won't be okay or comfortable with the feeling of discomfort and the 387 00:25:52.440 --> 00:25:56.680 rejection that comes from a parent not liking you. And it is real, 388 00:25:57.279 --> 00:26:02.279 it is real, and you have to honor that, be okay with that. 389 00:26:03.000 --> 00:26:07.599 Allow the duality of yes, oh my gosh, imagine a life where 390 00:26:07.599 --> 00:26:11.920 my parents don't like me. That is a hard life to live. It 391 00:26:11.000 --> 00:26:15.480 is not comfortable, It is not what any of us wants. But what 392 00:26:15.640 --> 00:26:19.279 is important in the situation is you live out your truth. You know that, 393 00:26:19.480 --> 00:26:22.279 you know you need to be setting those boundaries. So how are you 394 00:26:22.359 --> 00:26:27.799 going to show up for your inner child who is deathly afraid of being rejected 395 00:26:27.839 --> 00:26:30.599 from a parent? How can you be your own best friend? How can 396 00:26:30.640 --> 00:26:36.079 you be your own parent? Because the truth is, in this life, 397 00:26:36.079 --> 00:26:41.160 there are gonna be hard things that you have to come to terms with and 398 00:26:41.640 --> 00:26:45.559 it's not going to be easy, but you can get through it. It's 399 00:26:45.599 --> 00:26:51.400 either that or you continue to live a life of being completely inauthentic and you 400 00:26:51.480 --> 00:26:55.680 hold in these feelings and you no longer live your life for yourself and you 401 00:26:55.720 --> 00:26:59.920 live it for other people who most likely if they're not allowing you to hold 402 00:27:00.160 --> 00:27:03.039 boundary, they don't have their own boundaries put in place and they do not 403 00:27:03.160 --> 00:27:04.839 know how to set their own in their own lives. And a reframe can 404 00:27:04.920 --> 00:27:10.960 also be thinking about the best case scenario. Maybe the best case scenario is 405 00:27:11.319 --> 00:27:14.680 you set boundaries with your family. It is uncomfortable, it is not the 406 00:27:14.720 --> 00:27:17.799 best. Maybe some people don't miss that whatever, they don't like you or 407 00:27:18.000 --> 00:27:22.440 they have an opinion on this, But maybe that's the best thing for you. 408 00:27:22.519 --> 00:27:25.079 We already know that's the best thing for you, but the best thing 409 00:27:25.160 --> 00:27:30.359 for your entire family unit that down the line, that actually creates a stronger 410 00:27:30.400 --> 00:27:33.799 bond with you. Guys, Why do we always have to go to the 411 00:27:33.799 --> 00:27:37.480 negative again? Right? Like I said, we're so addicted to worst case, 412 00:27:37.519 --> 00:27:38.920 worst case, worst case. This is gonna be the worst thing and 413 00:27:40.119 --> 00:27:42.319 it's not gonna turn out well, and they're gonna hate me. What if 414 00:27:42.359 --> 00:27:47.680 they don't, and listen, if they do, the best case for you 415 00:27:47.880 --> 00:27:52.400 is you don't internalize it. You don't internalize the fact that somebody doesn't like 416 00:27:52.440 --> 00:27:56.440 you because you set a boundary. That's the best case, someone said they 417 00:27:56.440 --> 00:28:00.960 have a fear of being alone, which is everyone's fear at some point. 418 00:28:00.000 --> 00:28:04.240 The best way to stop being afraid of being alone is to learn how to 419 00:28:04.240 --> 00:28:11.039 be alone. Now, will this fix the entirety of needing human connection and 420 00:28:11.200 --> 00:28:15.200 longing for that partner or longing for that family. Absolutely not. That is 421 00:28:15.279 --> 00:28:18.559 not what we are trying to do here. But if you are definitely afraid 422 00:28:18.759 --> 00:28:21.799 of being alone, it's impacting your day to day habits. You don't know 423 00:28:21.799 --> 00:28:26.039 how to be alone, and you're creating these codependent relationships or unhealthy relationships. 424 00:28:26.279 --> 00:28:30.519 It is important that you learn how to actually face the reality of being alone. 425 00:28:30.519 --> 00:28:32.960 And there might be a valid reason as to why you're afraid of being 426 00:28:32.960 --> 00:28:37.440 alone. You might be afraid of being alone because when you once experienced being 427 00:28:37.480 --> 00:28:41.759 alone, it was the worst possible thing you could ever feel within yourself, 428 00:28:41.839 --> 00:28:45.759 and you've been running away all your life, not trying to feel that deep 429 00:28:45.839 --> 00:28:48.839 emptiness, which is so understandable. But what I've found that's very helpful in 430 00:28:48.880 --> 00:28:55.319 my life is to be with that part of me that has never fully experienced 431 00:28:55.880 --> 00:29:00.279 what it actually means to be alone. Being alone does not need to feel 432 00:29:00.279 --> 00:29:03.880 like a jail cell the way that it once felt in childhood. When I 433 00:29:03.920 --> 00:29:07.480 felt alone in childhood, that's what it felt like. It felt like somebody 434 00:29:07.519 --> 00:29:10.799 locked me up and put me away and they forgot about me, and I 435 00:29:10.839 --> 00:29:12.920 was never gonna get out, and I was so afraid and so confused as 436 00:29:12.920 --> 00:29:18.079 to why I was even alone. That's not how you have to experience being 437 00:29:18.200 --> 00:29:22.240 alone with yourself now in your adult life. But you have to be the 438 00:29:22.279 --> 00:29:26.400 one to differentiate between whether it is your inner child that's running away from that 439 00:29:26.519 --> 00:29:30.559 fear or your adult self. And usually it's that young child that does not 440 00:29:30.759 --> 00:29:33.440 know how to experience being alone, so of course you're going to be running 441 00:29:33.440 --> 00:29:37.079 away from it. And so the best thing that I did for myself is 442 00:29:37.119 --> 00:29:41.920 to be there with that young part of me that needed somebody or something, 443 00:29:41.240 --> 00:29:45.000 or to look at it in a different way and know that it's not about 444 00:29:45.039 --> 00:29:48.319 being in a jail cell. And becoming my own best friend has really helped 445 00:29:48.359 --> 00:29:53.480 me in these times where I feel like it is that jail cell feeling of 446 00:29:53.519 --> 00:29:57.559 being alone, but also on the flip side, understanding that I need to 447 00:29:57.599 --> 00:30:03.000 meet my inner child's needs of not wanting to be alone with real connection, 448 00:30:03.400 --> 00:30:06.160 because at the end of the day. Yes, we're not meant to be 449 00:30:06.200 --> 00:30:07.440 alone. Yes we need to go out in the world and we need to 450 00:30:07.480 --> 00:30:12.640 have those connections, whether it's friendships or romantic or whatever it is. You 451 00:30:12.720 --> 00:30:15.880 are not meant to be alone. Also, coming back to that reframe, 452 00:30:17.039 --> 00:30:21.680 there's eight billion people in this world and there's no chance on earth that I 453 00:30:21.720 --> 00:30:26.279 will end up alone. And the last thing to take this pressure off of 454 00:30:26.559 --> 00:30:30.640 the fear of being alone is let's stop putting time on this. Let's stop 455 00:30:30.640 --> 00:30:33.240 having time urgency on these things. I have to be with somebody by this 456 00:30:33.400 --> 00:30:37.119 age, or I have to be in a marriage by this age, or 457 00:30:37.160 --> 00:30:40.480 I need to have a family started at this time. Take it away. 458 00:30:40.519 --> 00:30:44.240 I promise you it will lessen your fears. Okay, let's run through these 459 00:30:44.240 --> 00:30:48.559 a little bit quicker, because I know my camera is gonna die or overheat. 460 00:30:48.759 --> 00:30:53.240 And I feel like I've explained a lot about the process of thinking through 461 00:30:53.279 --> 00:30:56.359 your fears, which I just want you guys to sit down and really think 462 00:30:56.400 --> 00:31:02.000 about these fears instead of just the c them declaring them as if yep, 463 00:31:02.039 --> 00:31:03.799 this is my fear and that's that, not really saying that that's what you 464 00:31:03.799 --> 00:31:07.119 guys do. But I feel like I used to do that a lot of 465 00:31:07.160 --> 00:31:08.920 just being like, well, I'm just afraid of being seen or I'm afraid 466 00:31:10.000 --> 00:31:11.880 that I'm not going to have enough money, and it's like, okay, 467 00:31:11.920 --> 00:31:15.920 well why am I afraid? And what will happen if I that does happen? 468 00:31:17.000 --> 00:31:19.200 And will I be okay? And what's the alternative? And okay, 469 00:31:19.240 --> 00:31:23.519 you know what, I'm gonna go to that mindset anytime that I actually have 470 00:31:23.640 --> 00:31:27.599 this fear pop up, and I'm gonna redirect my mind, redirect my mind, 471 00:31:27.880 --> 00:31:33.079 redirect your mind when it comes to these things, which is the most 472 00:31:33.079 --> 00:31:36.480 important thing. So someone said constantly in fear of financial collapse, I love 473 00:31:36.519 --> 00:31:38.960 paycheck to paycheck. So yeah, what will you do if you collap? 474 00:31:40.039 --> 00:31:44.079 Will you be okay? I want you to think that out. And I'm 475 00:31:44.119 --> 00:31:48.240 not saying this like oh you will or you won't, but genuinely think it 476 00:31:48.240 --> 00:31:52.079 out. Will you be okay if you collapse? What will happen? What 477 00:31:52.319 --> 00:31:55.759 is your plan if that will happen? What would you realistically do? Because 478 00:31:55.839 --> 00:31:57.920 I know what I would do if if my YouTube doesn't work out or my 479 00:31:57.960 --> 00:32:01.640 podcast or whatever, I go get a job. You know why, because 480 00:32:01.720 --> 00:32:06.279 I have skills I'm a hard worker. I will figure it out like I 481 00:32:06.440 --> 00:32:09.279 always do. But you have to wire your brain to be more focused on 482 00:32:09.400 --> 00:32:14.480 the positive outcome than the negative. And that is what you do when you 483 00:32:14.559 --> 00:32:17.799 have constant fears about something. You're so in the well, this is gonna 484 00:32:17.799 --> 00:32:20.880 happen, It's gonna be the worst thing. I'm gonna collapse. I'm gonna 485 00:32:20.880 --> 00:32:24.119 collapse. Why not reprogram your mind every single time you think about going for 486 00:32:24.200 --> 00:32:29.319 something that you're afraid of. Why don't you program your mind to win? 487 00:32:30.039 --> 00:32:32.359 What if it works out? What if I make more money than I ever 488 00:32:32.440 --> 00:32:37.359 even thought? What if I build a business that changes the world. What 489 00:32:37.440 --> 00:32:39.559 if they approve me. What if it works out exactly the way that I 490 00:32:39.640 --> 00:32:44.160 need to But you're too afraid to do that. You're too afraid to what 491 00:32:45.000 --> 00:32:50.440 be disappointed if you actually thought positively about that fear and it turns out that 492 00:32:50.480 --> 00:32:54.079 it didn't work out. So then what you want to be resilient and being 493 00:32:54.160 --> 00:32:57.680 okay with the fact that, yes, that might not work out, you 494 00:32:57.720 --> 00:33:01.319 will be okay. I will be okay. Hey, if I think positively 495 00:33:01.680 --> 00:33:05.839 about something and it doesn't work out, I would rather do that in my 496 00:33:05.920 --> 00:33:09.079 life than to think negatively because I'm too afraid of the disappointment that will come 497 00:33:09.240 --> 00:33:13.279 if that thing doesn't work out. I'm good it doesn't get you anywhere, 498 00:33:13.279 --> 00:33:15.319 I promise you that. Also, when it comes to the fear of finances 499 00:33:15.359 --> 00:33:20.200 and you know, being broken, that which is such a fear like everyone's 500 00:33:20.240 --> 00:33:23.680 always like in fear of these main things of finding love or living or you 501 00:33:23.680 --> 00:33:25.559 know, making money. This, that, and the third, I think 502 00:33:25.599 --> 00:33:29.720 that it's really important that you saturate your mind with people who have made it, 503 00:33:30.119 --> 00:33:34.039 people who are successful, people who are telling you it's possible. Stop 504 00:33:34.599 --> 00:33:39.039 igniting your brain with things that are negative. You are probably somebody who is 505 00:33:39.079 --> 00:33:44.720 watching and maybe you're not so like I don't want to like be negative also, 506 00:33:44.960 --> 00:33:49.000 but as just coming from personal experience, and this is what I see. 507 00:33:49.279 --> 00:33:52.000 You're probably somebody who is consuming some sort of content, or you having 508 00:33:52.039 --> 00:33:58.240 some sort of conversation, or you are dialed into the most negative conversations when 509 00:33:58.279 --> 00:34:01.960 it comes to life, when it comes to money, right, So I 510 00:34:02.039 --> 00:34:06.079 want you to go find those people. And this is what to be Magnetic, 511 00:34:06.079 --> 00:34:08.440 which is a great manifestation podcast if you're really interested in manifestation, the 512 00:34:08.519 --> 00:34:13.280 science behind it, human behavior things of that sort, things that are not 513 00:34:13.400 --> 00:34:15.320 just up in the air. Sometimes people don't believe in manifesting and stuff, 514 00:34:15.840 --> 00:34:19.440 But I would suggest you go listen to our podcast. But they talk about 515 00:34:19.519 --> 00:34:22.880 having expanders, which is important when it comes to manifesting. Because you've never 516 00:34:22.920 --> 00:34:24.920 seen it happen, it's gonna be hard for you to convince your mind that 517 00:34:24.960 --> 00:34:30.039 it's able to happen for you. And so finding people who are similar to 518 00:34:30.119 --> 00:34:34.400 you, that maybe even have an upbringing similar to you or have gone through 519 00:34:34.519 --> 00:34:37.400 similar experiences, even if they haven't, that's fine. You always want to 520 00:34:37.400 --> 00:34:40.360 look up to people who have what you want. Stop listening to people who 521 00:34:40.400 --> 00:34:45.519 are feeding you either lies or scarcity or it's not gonna happen, or it's 522 00:34:45.559 --> 00:34:50.840 gonna be hard enough with it. It never listen. Take it from somebody 523 00:34:50.840 --> 00:34:53.519 who's been successful in a few areas of her life. At least it didn't 524 00:34:53.519 --> 00:34:58.519 get me anywhere watching people who would complain about the fact that it takes forever 525 00:34:58.559 --> 00:35:01.159 to grow on YouTube, or oh, it's not a setup for a lot 526 00:35:01.199 --> 00:35:05.400 of people. This that. No, it's bullshit. It's all fear. 527 00:35:05.559 --> 00:35:09.119 Everyone is living in fear, and people are constantly spewing out limiting beliefs and 528 00:35:09.960 --> 00:35:15.159 just constant limiting things. Okay, you have to be careful even when it 529 00:35:15.159 --> 00:35:19.639 comes to me. Everyone has a bias and everyone has a limiting belief But 530 00:35:20.000 --> 00:35:22.599 I do my best to try and be as optimistic as I can, and 531 00:35:22.719 --> 00:35:27.360 you know, give that to other people, because that's what's helped me and 532 00:35:27.480 --> 00:35:30.719 that's what I'll continue to do. Someone said fear of marrying the wrong person, 533 00:35:30.840 --> 00:35:35.199 getting divorced, someone cheating, someone dying, which is again another big 534 00:35:35.239 --> 00:35:38.159 fear, and I think that that is the probably the biggest fear that I've 535 00:35:38.199 --> 00:35:43.320 been facing this year in my life. My twenty eighth year on this earth 536 00:35:43.800 --> 00:35:50.039 is death. I feel like that the times really hit me this year, 537 00:35:50.079 --> 00:35:53.719 which is crazy because I have looked death in the face multiple times in my 538 00:35:53.800 --> 00:36:00.599 loved ones, and I've experienced actually having a parent pass away, and I've 539 00:36:00.639 --> 00:36:05.679 also had a lot of ailments that I really genuinely thought was going to end 540 00:36:05.760 --> 00:36:09.599 me. And sometimes I look at those things which I'm not even trying to 541 00:36:09.639 --> 00:36:13.800 laugh, but I'm like, I would have thought that I would be more 542 00:36:13.800 --> 00:36:16.719 afraid than and it doesn't mean that I was not afraid when I have gone 543 00:36:16.760 --> 00:36:23.960 through such traumatic things but it's crazy to experience the feeling that I feel when 544 00:36:23.960 --> 00:36:30.360 it comes to losing a loved one and or you know, the fact coming 545 00:36:30.400 --> 00:36:34.000 to the realization that one day I'm not going to be here. It's scary. 546 00:36:34.159 --> 00:36:39.159 It is like the most like real thing that's just made me think a 547 00:36:39.199 --> 00:36:45.960 lot this past year and created a lot of anxiety within my life. And 548 00:36:45.079 --> 00:36:49.480 so what I'll say to that is, you know, you got to let 549 00:36:49.519 --> 00:36:55.760 yourself feel the emotion that is the loss and the grief and the sadness that 550 00:36:55.800 --> 00:37:00.719 will come if that happens, you know, you losing a loved one or 551 00:37:00.840 --> 00:37:04.360 you you know, being cheated on, or the divorce happened. Like, 552 00:37:04.400 --> 00:37:07.440 it is real shit and it is gonna hurt. It is gonna hurt, 553 00:37:07.599 --> 00:37:10.360 and it does hurt. And I've been through it, and that shit hurts. 554 00:37:10.400 --> 00:37:14.800 Okay, even if I can't understand why certain things are happening, they 555 00:37:14.800 --> 00:37:19.039 are happening for whatever reason, even if I can't figure out that reason, 556 00:37:19.159 --> 00:37:23.679 And that is something that every single person on this earth faces and has to 557 00:37:23.719 --> 00:37:30.599 face at one point. And I try and remind myself that what I'm here 558 00:37:30.639 --> 00:37:36.039 to do right now is not continuously waste the time that I have being in 559 00:37:36.119 --> 00:37:39.199 such fear of the reality of what is, which is death, which is 560 00:37:39.400 --> 00:37:45.039 loss, which is heartbreak, which is whatever. I would not want to 561 00:37:45.280 --> 00:37:50.519 strip myself from the present moment. What is the point on creating more suffering? 562 00:37:50.559 --> 00:37:55.199 That is what suffering is is taking a real pain and continuing to drag 563 00:37:55.280 --> 00:38:01.039 it on or to create the actual feeling of when it's not even happened yet, 564 00:38:01.360 --> 00:38:06.440 it's not manifested, it might not even ever manifest And even when it 565 00:38:06.440 --> 00:38:10.719 comes to things like relationship stuff or fear of divorce at this that coming back 566 00:38:10.760 --> 00:38:16.599 to that's a real possibility. Will you be okay? Will you get up 567 00:38:16.639 --> 00:38:21.360 from the dumps of what that will feel like if it happens. Yes, 568 00:38:21.440 --> 00:38:23.519 you will as long as you believe that you will. It's not to say 569 00:38:23.519 --> 00:38:28.559 that it's gonna be easy. But another thing is is, like I said, 570 00:38:28.639 --> 00:38:31.360 we kind of manifest our biggest fears, so doing your best to not 571 00:38:31.559 --> 00:38:36.800 try to invite that into your life. And usually we're afraid of these things 572 00:38:36.840 --> 00:38:39.239 because it's happened in the past, you know, or maybe you saw your 573 00:38:39.280 --> 00:38:45.920 parents that happened as well. And understanding and differentiating whether this is your actual 574 00:38:45.960 --> 00:38:49.559 fear that you want to continue to take on in your life, or is 575 00:38:49.599 --> 00:38:51.800 this something that you want to leave in your past? And it's going to 576 00:38:51.840 --> 00:38:54.440 be an act of you redirecting your mind to the positive. It's going to 577 00:38:54.480 --> 00:38:58.280 be you thinking, oh, well, what if this happens, or what 578 00:38:58.320 --> 00:39:00.119 if I get cheated on, or what if this is happens, or what 579 00:39:00.159 --> 00:39:04.440 if it turns out exactly the way that I actually want deep down, or 580 00:39:04.480 --> 00:39:07.880 what if it doesn't actually turn into divorce and it turns into this most beautiful 581 00:39:07.880 --> 00:39:10.199 marriage that no one's ever seen before. Let's try and do our best to 582 00:39:10.239 --> 00:39:14.000 focus on that. That's what I do in my life. You don't think 583 00:39:14.000 --> 00:39:16.199 that I've seen the shittiest relationships in my life. You don't think that I've 584 00:39:16.239 --> 00:39:21.039 seen the brokest times ever. I've lived the brokest times ever. Just know 585 00:39:21.239 --> 00:39:24.360 that I have. I have seen, Like I said, I have seen 586 00:39:24.559 --> 00:39:30.480 death in front of me multiple times. And if you don't understand what I 587 00:39:30.519 --> 00:39:32.000 mean, I mean I've seen people overdose in front of me. And I 588 00:39:32.039 --> 00:39:37.280 still do the best that I possibly can in my life to hope for the 589 00:39:37.320 --> 00:39:42.440 best for others but even myself, to hope for life that things will work 590 00:39:42.480 --> 00:39:45.320 out. That people will live a long life, that people can change, 591 00:39:45.320 --> 00:39:47.719 that people will grow, that people will be healthy, and that they will 592 00:39:47.760 --> 00:39:52.079 sustain and they will live life and they will go on. I can move 593 00:39:52.119 --> 00:39:57.079 through the mere reality of losing a parent and being like, well, I'm 594 00:39:57.079 --> 00:40:00.480 going to lose everyone that's important to me, or one day this is going 595 00:40:00.559 --> 00:40:05.400 to end. And the truth is, yes, one day that's going to 596 00:40:05.519 --> 00:40:07.480 end. But you know what, I choose to believe it the way that's 597 00:40:07.519 --> 00:40:12.039 going to end is not going to be as hurtful as it was when it 598 00:40:12.199 --> 00:40:15.480 ended that way. Or I choose to believe that just because this happened in 599 00:40:15.519 --> 00:40:19.920 my past does not mean that it's going to dictate my future. But it's 600 00:40:19.960 --> 00:40:23.840 an active redirecting your thoughts. And the last thing I'll say about this is 601 00:40:24.599 --> 00:40:28.559 when things don't work out in my life, some of the hardest things that 602 00:40:28.599 --> 00:40:31.480 I've ever witnessed, the biggest losses I've ever lost in my life, or 603 00:40:31.599 --> 00:40:38.079 the hardest pain that I've ever felt, those things make me who I am 604 00:40:38.119 --> 00:40:42.599 today, even though I would never want that to ever happen to me, 605 00:40:42.960 --> 00:40:45.800 or it experienced the way that I experienced it, or to have other people 606 00:40:46.000 --> 00:40:50.719 experience it But the truth is that's my story and that's what I went through. 607 00:40:50.800 --> 00:40:52.639 And when I look at the hardest times that I've been through through that 608 00:40:52.760 --> 00:40:59.000 lens that propels me forward in life, and that creates resilience, that creates 609 00:40:59.000 --> 00:41:04.320 a story, that creates a path for me. And I would rather use 610 00:41:04.679 --> 00:41:07.599 the things that I've gone through in my life to propel me forward then the 611 00:41:07.639 --> 00:41:12.480 things that I have gone through my life as somewhere that's going to continue to 612 00:41:12.559 --> 00:41:15.440 keep me stuck, because I am not here to be stuck in my life 613 00:41:15.880 --> 00:41:20.199 just because and I say this at the end of my book, just because 614 00:41:20.320 --> 00:41:23.159 you got this deck of cards right here, Okay, full deck of cards. 615 00:41:23.199 --> 00:41:27.719 Your parents, genetics, your environment that you were in, the bullies 616 00:41:27.760 --> 00:41:30.719 that were around you, the brain that you have that doesn't process information as 617 00:41:30.800 --> 00:41:34.599 quick as the other kids in school, whatever it is, that's your deck 618 00:41:34.639 --> 00:41:37.119 of cards. But who said that you can't up level it and change it 619 00:41:37.159 --> 00:41:42.159 when you want. Well, society is not taught you that you could do 620 00:41:42.239 --> 00:41:45.599 that, which is understandable. There are people around you that have their own 621 00:41:45.679 --> 00:41:47.840 limiting beliefs and tell you that you can't have what you want in your life. 622 00:41:47.880 --> 00:41:51.480 But what I learned at a very young age. Is that's not going 623 00:41:51.559 --> 00:41:54.039 to be my story. I don't like this story. I don't like this 624 00:41:54.119 --> 00:41:59.400 deck of cards, to be honest, and can I escape every single part 625 00:41:59.440 --> 00:42:02.199 of this realc No. But I can do my damn near best to focus 626 00:42:02.239 --> 00:42:06.960 on what I can control and the cards that I can change, and I 627 00:42:06.960 --> 00:42:10.639 will continue to do that until this entire deck is completely different. And guess 628 00:42:10.679 --> 00:42:15.519 what, in my life it is completely different than the deck that was handed 629 00:42:15.519 --> 00:42:20.480 to me. And why because I decided to look at the positive instead of 630 00:42:20.480 --> 00:42:22.960 look at the negative all the time. And this is not saying this is 631 00:42:22.000 --> 00:42:25.280 gonna be a hop, skip and a jump to your best life, right, 632 00:42:25.360 --> 00:42:30.440 This is real shit. This is you going through your actual emotions and 633 00:42:30.480 --> 00:42:34.199 showing up and being there for yourself and things not working out and things being 634 00:42:34.199 --> 00:42:37.719 confusing and things hurting and you losing time. And I was sick for like 635 00:42:37.840 --> 00:42:40.360 so many years of my life. Okay, I felt like I lost a 636 00:42:40.400 --> 00:42:45.599 lot of my life. I lost a lot of time with parents. I 637 00:42:45.639 --> 00:42:47.800 didn't have a lot of time with a parent. There's many things. But 638 00:42:47.840 --> 00:42:52.079 I still choose to look at my life as you know what, that is 639 00:42:52.119 --> 00:42:54.559 my life and I'm not gonna go through life and be like, Oh I 640 00:42:54.599 --> 00:42:59.760 lost all this time, or oh regrets or I can't let go. I'm 641 00:42:59.760 --> 00:43:01.480 not doing that. I'm not doing that to myself. And when I say 642 00:43:01.519 --> 00:43:04.599 I'm not doing that to myself, I say that I'm not doing it to 643 00:43:04.639 --> 00:43:07.079 my younger self because she doesn't deserve that, and your younger self does not 644 00:43:07.159 --> 00:43:09.639 deserve that as well. If you can't even do it for yourself, then 645 00:43:09.719 --> 00:43:13.800 do it for your inner child. Do it for your younger self that never 646 00:43:13.960 --> 00:43:16.519 got the things that they deserved in their life. Okay, another thing, 647 00:43:16.639 --> 00:43:21.519 somebody said they have a fear of gaining weight. This definitely runs deep. 648 00:43:21.559 --> 00:43:24.039 I talk about this in my book when it comes to self hate and our 649 00:43:24.079 --> 00:43:29.159 inner critics and where they come from. And I actually give you practices joeneral 650 00:43:29.239 --> 00:43:32.199 practices in my book when it comes to uncovering your shadow. Shadow work is 651 00:43:32.239 --> 00:43:35.760 really good for insecurities, but at the end of the day, you have 652 00:43:35.800 --> 00:43:38.920 to face that fear of the reality of you not being liked or picked or 653 00:43:38.960 --> 00:43:44.360 wanted, and most likely you're protecting yourself from not being picked or liked or 654 00:43:44.360 --> 00:43:47.280 wanted in your life. So you are definitely afraid to make a mistake or 655 00:43:47.360 --> 00:43:51.760 definitely afraid to be made fun of this that, and nobody likes to be 656 00:43:51.800 --> 00:43:53.960 made fun of. I don't like to be made fun of. But in 657 00:43:54.000 --> 00:43:58.800 my life I know that if somebody doesn't like me for me, if somebody 658 00:43:58.800 --> 00:44:00.760 doesn't like the way that I looked, the way that I act, the 659 00:44:00.760 --> 00:44:05.400 way that I dress, it's not a meat problem. It's simply they don't 660 00:44:05.440 --> 00:44:07.840 appreciate the thing that I have in this life, and that is that. 661 00:44:08.000 --> 00:44:10.840 And I don't need to live for other people. All right, y'all, 662 00:44:10.880 --> 00:44:15.039 my camera died, so I don't really remember where I was when it comes 663 00:44:15.079 --> 00:44:19.079 to the gaining weight thing. But at the end of the day, you're 664 00:44:19.480 --> 00:44:23.760 allowed to gain weight. And I would also consider the judgment and standards that 665 00:44:23.800 --> 00:44:29.440 you're actually holding for yourself, because that's really what it is is. You're 666 00:44:29.480 --> 00:44:32.599 not allowing yourself to gain weight, You're not allowing yourself to have flaws, 667 00:44:32.639 --> 00:44:37.239 you're not allowing yourself to be a human. Why where is that running deep 668 00:44:37.280 --> 00:44:42.039 from? And ask yourself, do you really want to live life where you're 669 00:44:42.079 --> 00:44:45.519 not allowed to be human? Because I don't think that that's the life that 670 00:44:45.559 --> 00:44:46.960 you really want to live. And a lot of times, we're the ones 671 00:44:47.000 --> 00:44:52.280 that are actually keeping that gel cell locked. You can open that right now, 672 00:44:52.320 --> 00:44:53.719 baby, you can open that right now and say, you know what, 673 00:44:54.840 --> 00:44:59.360 I'm allowed to be human. I don't need to be perfect, and 674 00:44:59.440 --> 00:45:04.039 quite frank, I no longer want to spend time around people who have that 675 00:45:04.199 --> 00:45:08.239 same standard for me. I want to be around people who unconditionally love me, 676 00:45:08.280 --> 00:45:13.079 that understand that I am not perfect. Okay, someone said fear that 677 00:45:13.079 --> 00:45:15.639 I'm wasting my time in my twenties not accomplishing things. And then someone also 678 00:45:15.679 --> 00:45:20.400 said they're thirty three with a lot of things to do, and they feel 679 00:45:20.400 --> 00:45:23.280 like they've wasted their life. And I think that everything that I said in 680 00:45:23.280 --> 00:45:27.480 this episode is really probably already given you the advice that you need. But 681 00:45:27.599 --> 00:45:30.280 you just need to remind yourself that there's no rule book. There's really no 682 00:45:30.440 --> 00:45:34.599 rule book but the one that you have created in your head based off other 683 00:45:34.679 --> 00:45:38.599 people, based off of you comparing yourself, based off of somebody telling you 684 00:45:38.679 --> 00:45:43.440 that you should be more further along than you are. So change the rule 685 00:45:43.440 --> 00:45:45.840 book. If you don't want to feel like you have ran out of time 686 00:45:45.880 --> 00:45:50.519 in your life, then change the rule book. Who even wrote this in 687 00:45:50.559 --> 00:45:52.239 the first place. Also, if you feel like you've wasted a lot of 688 00:45:52.280 --> 00:45:58.480 time in your life and there's just so much to do, like, you 689 00:45:58.519 --> 00:46:01.920 have two options. You either decide to continue to wallow in the fact that 690 00:46:01.960 --> 00:46:07.119 you have wasted time and continue to waste more time, because that's what you 691 00:46:07.280 --> 00:46:09.760 do when you're caught up in the fact that you've wasted time, or you 692 00:46:09.800 --> 00:46:13.519 can just do the thing that you really want to do, because at the 693 00:46:13.599 --> 00:46:15.880 end of the day, you're going to continue to try and do that thing 694 00:46:15.880 --> 00:46:20.079 because you're a human being and you're always programmed to want more and to follow 695 00:46:20.119 --> 00:46:23.360 your desires, and also understand that the time is going to pass anyways. 696 00:46:23.440 --> 00:46:28.599 So there's really not a point in continuing the suffering that you are creating for 697 00:46:28.719 --> 00:46:35.000 yourself by continuing to dwell in the past in things that haven't even happened yet. 698 00:46:35.239 --> 00:46:37.280 Okay, so that's all the fears that I'm going to read out today. 699 00:46:37.320 --> 00:46:40.880 There were so many fears, But I do think that this episode probably 700 00:46:40.880 --> 00:46:45.440 gave you enough advice. I just want to reiterate this thing. When it 701 00:46:45.480 --> 00:46:50.280 comes to facing fears, it runs deep, and I want you to get 702 00:46:50.320 --> 00:46:53.960 to that core wound because there is one it's not actually the fact that you're 703 00:46:53.960 --> 00:46:58.840 going to gain weight, it's what it will mean to other people, or 704 00:46:59.239 --> 00:47:02.400 you're worth to time other people if that thing happens, which is rooted to 705 00:47:02.519 --> 00:47:07.280 something that you once felt somewhere in your life, or you've watched it happen 706 00:47:07.360 --> 00:47:10.199 to other people, and you do not want to feel that within yourself, 707 00:47:10.320 --> 00:47:15.719 in which I would say, face that emotion, face the reality of yes, 708 00:47:15.360 --> 00:47:20.000 maybe people will not like you. Will you be okay? Maybe there 709 00:47:20.000 --> 00:47:22.840 will be disappointment in your life. Will you be okay? Maybe you will 710 00:47:22.880 --> 00:47:28.679 have to feel alone in your life. Will you be okay? Well, 711 00:47:28.960 --> 00:47:32.679 you will be okay if you start to program your mind to think more optimistic, 712 00:47:34.280 --> 00:47:37.440 think about the positive, Think about how you can spin this into your 713 00:47:37.480 --> 00:47:42.920 favor. How could this actually be working out exactly in your favor? How 714 00:47:42.960 --> 00:47:46.039 could you look at this as this is the exact piece of puzzle that I 715 00:47:46.239 --> 00:47:52.079 needed to make this entire picture, and it's going to work out exactly the 716 00:47:52.119 --> 00:47:54.760 way that it's meant to. I would highly suggest you take a look at 717 00:47:54.800 --> 00:47:58.280 your life and you think about it like that, because if not, then 718 00:47:58.280 --> 00:48:00.039 you're just going to be creating more suffering than you need and quite frankly, 719 00:48:00.079 --> 00:48:04.440 you've probably been suffering a lot in your life already and there's no need for 720 00:48:04.480 --> 00:48:07.159 it, So set yourself free. And I think probably the next episode, 721 00:48:07.159 --> 00:48:10.400 I'm not sure, but within the next few episodes, I want to talk 722 00:48:10.400 --> 00:48:15.000 about how to be more emotionally mature. So I'll kind of dive a little 723 00:48:15.000 --> 00:48:17.599 bit more deeper into emotions because I feel like, genuinely, the reason why 724 00:48:17.639 --> 00:48:21.320 we don't do a lot of things in our lives is because we are afraid 725 00:48:21.320 --> 00:48:24.039 of that feeling. And once you get good at actually just being with yourself 726 00:48:24.079 --> 00:48:30.000 through the times where you do feel afraid, or you feel agree or loss 727 00:48:30.079 --> 00:48:32.920 or these these really hard things that are real and that make you not feel 728 00:48:32.960 --> 00:48:37.119 good. But once you can get comfortable with those things, you will be 729 00:48:37.320 --> 00:48:40.119 unstoppable. You genuinely will. It doesn't mean that you will not feel those 730 00:48:40.159 --> 00:48:45.159 things once in your life. It doesn't mean that you will not hate every 731 00:48:45.239 --> 00:48:49.559 second of it, but you will be more resilient and you will be more 732 00:48:49.559 --> 00:48:52.280 confident in your life. And that's just what I do in my life when 733 00:48:52.280 --> 00:48:55.719 I'm not feeling the best, or you know, when I'm feeling anxious about 734 00:48:55.719 --> 00:49:00.000 something or I'm overthinking something or if I'm worried that something's not going to work, 735 00:49:00.320 --> 00:49:02.519 I remind myself that I'm gonna be okay. If that thing don't work 736 00:49:02.559 --> 00:49:06.519 out. It's not going to feel good, it's gonna be uncomfortable. I'm 737 00:49:06.519 --> 00:49:08.719 probably gonna have a good cry, i might have to rebrand my life. 738 00:49:08.760 --> 00:49:12.920 But you know what, something beautiful will come out of that thing, and 739 00:49:12.960 --> 00:49:15.440 that's what I'm going to leave it at. So I hope you guys enjoyed 740 00:49:15.440 --> 00:49:16.119 and I'll see in the next one. Bye.