WEBVTT

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Hey, hey, hey, hey, I'm bad with something for you to

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think about. I'm gonna step on
some toes a little bit. So many

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of you out there are staying in
the wrong relationships with the wrong people.

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And you know it. You know
you're in a relationship with the wrong person.

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Why are you staying in that relationship? Why you have to think about

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it? Some of you are spending
your time complaining about what's going on in

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the relationship. He's doing this,
she's doing that. But you are the

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ones who have set the tone.
You set the tone when you do nothing

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about the things people do to you. You don't love the person, you

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don't even want to be in a
relationship. But you're staying because you have

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insecurity. You staying because you're fearful
of moving forward. You're staying because of

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what other people going to say.
All excuses. Some of you are using

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the children as pawns, excuses because
you don't want to face reality that you're

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in a dad in relationship that you
need to move on and away from.

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I mean, I cannot tell you
the many people that I have talked to

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who are literally miserable in their current
relationships, but they're staying they're staying because

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we have a nice home. I
have this, I have that, he

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provides this or whatever. So what. That's why I always talk to you

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all about having your own. If
you have your own, you don't have

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to worry about any of that.
See, what people fail to realize is

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their security. It's not yours.
It's a figment of your imagination. You

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think because your significant can other have
this or that, it's yours. No,

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it's theirs. Some of you find
out the hard way too. I

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just believe every adult who's capable,
and if you have two legs, two

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arms in your right mind, you're
capable. I believe every every adult should

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have their own, every woman,
every man. That way, no one

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can hold anything over your head,
and you will not be insecure if it

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don't work out because you have your
own. That's what I believe. That's

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just me, though. So many
people are in miserable situations because they're in

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relationships holding on to individuals that they
don't want to be with. I've talked

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about this several times on different episodes. You're just done. Some of you

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never wanted to be with the person
you went on with the relationship because of

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other people whether children, parents,
friends, whomever. Now you're in the

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relationship, no connection at all.
You're miserable, you're unhappy, but you're

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still there. Please tell me why
you do that to yourselves? Why.

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I'll tell you why. I don't
even know you. But normally it's excuses.

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It's excuses. You're crippled by excuses. You're crippled by fear. So

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you said old. The children are
young, some of you your children in

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college, some of you your children
gone long gone. But you're still making

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that as an excuse. Craziness for
anybody to go through life with a man

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or a woman that you don't want
to be with. You have no connection

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with that person. You're just worried
about what other people are gonna say.

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They're gonna they're talking about you right
now. How about that they are talking

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about you right now because they see
your misery, they see there's no connection

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between you and your significant other.
They see that you're faking it, So

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they're talking about you anyways, while
you're so worried about what they're saying.

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They're gonna talk about you period.
They'll talking about you, even if your

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relationship what's the greatest. They'll talk
about you out of jealousy. People are

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gonna talk, You're never gonna stop
them. That's no reason to hold yourself

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to a relationship that's loveless, no
intimacy, nothing, and you're miserable.

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You will be completely amazed the many, many, many people who are in

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these types of relationships just faking it. Get out in the opening with other

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people, pretending they're so happy in
their miserbles, don't hold hands, don't

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kiss though, nothing when they're behind
closed doors. But they're faking in front

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of people. For what, it
has to be exhausting to keep living lies

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full of faking and pretense. It
has to be exhausting. All of the

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energy and time people put into faking
and pretending you could put into really making

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a relationship work or being with someone
that you really want to be with.

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For people spend their lives wasting their
lives on dead end relationship with the wrong

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people. It does not make sense, but this is what people choose out

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of their insecurities. You don't have
your own. When you don't have your

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own, that's the state of mind
you're in. You're insecure. You don't

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know how you're going to live,
you don't know where you're going to live.

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You don't have anything, so you
would rather stay where you have something

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versus starting over because you don't have
anything. You put yourself in that situation.

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Anytime you're totally dependent on someone else, anything may happen. Anything.

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Some of you have dedicated your lives
to individuals that you're not even married to.

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You've been with them for years and
years, and they die and leave

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you with nothing. Some of you
are married to them and they die and

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leave you with nothing. Ridiculous,
ridiculous. You live all of your life

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that individuals. They died and left
you with nothing, and you still have

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to start over from the ground up. You were living with that person,

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disconnected in that relationship. They died
and you still died. They died,

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Let me get it right. They
died and you still end up with nothing

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because whatever they had it went to
someone else. That must feel terrible feeling.

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But people definitely are living it.
Definitely, I personally know a few

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terrible. Then you have people who
have been together years and years, not

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married in the same thing. The
significant other die left with nothing because somebody

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else gets it because they left it
to someone else. Crazy and you have

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to know who you're with. You
have to know what's going on in your

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relationships. He was with the wrong
person. And too many people are subjecting

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themselves to these types of relationships totally
unhappy. They're not growing, you're disconnected,

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you live separate, but you're still
there because of their security. It's

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not yours. And I've said it
a million times because this is what people

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do. They get into relationships.
Their wives treat them like crap, or

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their husbands treat them like crap.
Neither nor won't the other, but nobody

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will do anything about it. Sometimes
one person want the other, the other

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person don't want that person. But
sometimes neither persons, neither individual want the

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other. That's just crazy, it's
foolishness because you're so worried about what other

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people gonna say. Honey, they're
talking right now. They see through your

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smoke screen, your camouflage, and
I just think it's terrible, especially when

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there's kids involved. Kids see what's
going on. They see there's no kind

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of affection between their parents. They
see it, They hear the arguing,

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they see the separation within the home. What do you think you're planting?

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What seeds you think you're planting in
your children. Oh, you're teaching them

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something because they see what's going on. They hear what's going on, So

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you're teaching them something and it's not
good. I just wanted to talk about

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this because so many people in this
world are in the charade, just playing

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games, acting as if they have
the best relationship ever when it's the worst.

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It really is. You are limiting
your own life. You're limiting your

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own happiness because you're never gonna gain
happiness because you're unhappy inside. You're in

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a relationship where you're unhappy. You're
in a dead in relationship and you know

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it. You're yearning desperately for love, you're yearning desperately for some attention,

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but you're holding yourself to that relationship
because of your insecurities. And let me

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say this, I want to make
a point to say this. Not all

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the time, is it because you
have insecurities as far as you don't have

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anything. Sometimes people have things,
but they have other insecurities. It's secure

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about being alone, it's secure about
starting over. It doesn't matter what the

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insecurities are. If they're holding you
where you don't want to be, that's

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a problem. But this is what
people are doing to themselves all over the

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world staying with the wrong person,
knowing it's the wrong person. You're getting

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absolutely nothing out of the relationship other
than headache and heartache. How is that

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benefiting you? Please tell me how
it is benefiting you. It does not

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benefit you. It does not benefit
your children, because, let me tell

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you, a good parent, it's
going to be a parent, whether they're

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in the home or out of the
home. A good parent. So you

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can't use that as an excuse.
I know plenty who are parenting separate,

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but they're doing an awesome job.
So don't use that as an excuse.

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Do not use that as an excuse
to say, what's the wrong person?

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I had friends who are married for
forty some years. Forty some years misseraball

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couldn't stand one another. I just
I can only shake my head because it's

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ridiculous. It really is. I
know because I lived it for a short

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period with someone that I didn't want
to be with, someone that I totally

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lost respect for and everything because of
the things that he was doing. Then

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finally I was like, oh no, I'm out of here. Never look

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back. So I know people are
doing that. People have been together for

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years and years and years, and
then you have individuals looking on the outside

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looking in and they're like, oh, they have a great relationship. They've

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been together twenty years, thirty years, forty years, fifty years, sixty

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years. I don't mean that they're
happy. Just because people have been together

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a long time does not mean that
they're happy. Most are not. They

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just don't want to do anything different. They just don't want to start over.

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They just don't want to be by
themselves. It does not mean they're

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happy. Most of them are not
wasting time and energy, denying themselves the

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ability to possibly be with someone who
loves them, and they someone that they

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love. But you'll never get that
opportunity if you're spending your life with someone

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who isn't meant for you, the
wrong person. But again, this is

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what people are subjecting themselves to all
over the world. It's your life.

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You live at how you want to. But I think it's terrible that people

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do it. Just unhappy. There's
no affection at home, there's no communication,

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nothing, just roommates literally, because
a lot of people are living separate

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in the home, just companions.
Matter of fact, some you can't even

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classify as companions because they don't want
anything to do with each other. Companions

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normally are having some type of relationship, but a lot of people are living

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under the same room, totally disconnected, no type of communication, miserable,

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desperately yearning for love and attention.
Some are even getting it by from someone

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else. That's not right, it's
not You have to be earnest about it.

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If you're doing something else side of
your relationship, you're wrong. You're

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dead wrong. Especially if you're married, you're wrong. And just because you

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subjecting yourself to the misery, that
don't make going outside of your marriage right.

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Because you can do you can do
yourself a great favor. You can

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do the right thing for yourself,
but you choose not to. Everyone married.

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God didn't put together. That's a
fact. That's a fact. Everyone

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together. God did not put together. Most people put themselves together. And

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that's why there's no foundations. That's
why there's no connection in a lot of

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relationship. That's why they're such bickering
and argument, so much chaos and drama.

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Because God is not in it.
Jesus is not in it, never

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was from the beginning. Foundations are
not laid from the beginning, so people

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really just become whom they have always
been in their relationship, separate because there

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was no foundation from the beginning.
All the little things that you thought were

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so cute you hate now. You
know the old saying what used to make

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you smile and laugh, now the
very thing is making you cry. It's

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because people subject themselves to this pain
and misery, because most people live their

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lives for other people. What they're
gonna say, what they're gonna do.

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They're saying it now. They're talking
about you right now, and let me

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reenterate. That is why I say
you need to get your own. If

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you have your own, you don't
have to worry about someone taking it from

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you. Well, we're not together, so I want this and I want

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that back. You don't have to
worry about it when you have your own.

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I'm just saying, you live how
you want to live. I'm just

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putting it out there. Life is
too short. Let me tell you.

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People are leaving this world left and
right, left and right. Just recently,

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I know several people died within the
same week. Different people from different

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families died within the same week.
People are getting up out of here every

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day. We're all closer to death. So Why are you living your life

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in misery, living your life with
someone you don't want to be with,

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someone who don't want to be with
you. That's it. I'm not gonna

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go continue to beat this. I'm
leaving it right there. I hope you

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got enough out of it. Please
share this episode. Thank you for listening.

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Much love to each every one of
you. Remember it's your life.

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You create the monsters in your life. You teach people how to treat you,

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and they will teach you exactly how
you allow. Whatever you open yourself

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up to is exactly what you will
get. Please share this episode. I

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end every episode the very same,
and I hope and I pray that you

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do it. You need to do
it. Thank go on it