Super Are you gonna tell us yea Hello? This is Laura Kane after Dark.
This is a podcast. Obviously you found it on a podcast Oh my
God platform or on YouTube or on YouTube too. And our show also airs
on Instagram because we do it live on Monday nights. Yes, so I'm
Laura Kane. I host the show for now. I I decided to start
a podcast after my career in radios came to a sudden and horrible halt in
twenty seventeen when we were yanked off the air and I was left with nothing
and then but a dream, but a dream of doing a show with my
best friend, Jeric Grimmer. Hi. So in twenty nineteen, we got
together after seeing the movie. We saw the movie It. We stood outside
of Barnes and Noble. I got my little recorder Outarnes and Noble. This
is our very first podcast. I hope you used protection. I did,
and we talked about We did a little movie review, We did a little
like intro this is like the Bare Bones, and then it moved to Eric's
bed, Yes, and then we got in trouble for getting too naughty.
Yes. So then we had a dialect back a little bit. Then we
went through a whole other period of was a natious thing, you guys said
back then, Oh, I'll give you the term. I'll tell you the
term, but I'm not gonna tell you what it means. Do you even
know what I'm gonna say? I think so walking the dog? Oh yes,
over, yeah, walking, Yes, I do remember that. And
I don't think anybody will know what that means, which is good. I
know what that means because I don't want to go down that rabbit hole again
because that was not pretty, and your mom's mad at me and stuff.
It was bad. Oh yeah, your mom got mad at you too.
Oh my god. My mom was like, Laura, you don't need to
talk about butts and stuff all the time, like because we talk about poop
all the time and sex and stuff and so anyway, done with that.
But we cleaned up our act, well I cleaned up my act. Well
we kind of did, and then we we kind of go there sometimes again,
but not as bad. Well you go there? Do you like my
shirt? I do? This is how I feel most days, screaming inside.
Is that only when you look at me? No, it's all the
time. It's all the time. I'm just playing old sarcastic. Yes,
that's a cute one. I like the pink how it pops off your shirt.
It's a gray shirt with pink riding. Yes, okay, we want
you to save a date because you're gonna have a lot of fun. We're
getting married. It would that be crazy? Oh would I get your benefits?
Oh? I'll do whatever you want me to do. What would you
want from me? What would you possibly want for me to marry? To
get rid of that chair? Okay, done, done, done, that'd
be so bizarre. Anyway, what were you talking about? Oh, August
seventeenth, save the date. That's our party, because we've been doing this
for four years and that is an exact date we started August. It's our
pre engagement party. It's gonna be at Urban Mos and it is a fun
place. It's always packed on the weekends. It's gonna be a Thursday night.
They're gonna do it on stage for everybody to watch totally. Oh,
I may be up on the bar dancing. Who knows, well there are
you know? They have go go dancers there. Yeah, so you could
easily easy. So there's gonna be a drag show first, and our friend
Gigi who we love so much. Maybe if they're doing a casting call for
a Cocoon three, they let me up there you're almost there, not quite?
Hey, um watch it. So then we're gonna do our snookie.
I know I do look like snooky right now. This is what happens when
you fire your glam squad old school snooky with I have a big poof I
tried, I tried to change it up. Well, now you have three
big poofs. You just don't look so big right now. But whatever,
anyway, seem going down a rabbit hole. August seventeen, Urban Mos.
Six o'clock is when everybody's gonna be seated. Show starts at seven. Then
we do our show after the drag show, and it's gonna be a lot
of fun we're gonna have. We might have special guests, well I have
celebrity guests. We're working on all sorts of fun things. It's twenty dollars
at the door and the money raised goes to lgbtq I A plus Sunburst Centers
Youth House Housing. And this is for young people who are who fit these
categories who've been either kicked out of their home or find themselves homeless and it's
help. It's a house that that helps them get off the street. And
I think it's a good it is. That's what you're twenty dollars plus you
get two shows, you're three shows. Yeah, Laura might even be doing
an after hour show. You never know, who knows, you know,
I will be long gone by then I'll talk to my friend Ala. Yeah.
Yeah, I'll figure out how to do some after hours. You might
be walking the dog for a However, ask a lot of people. Okay,
so what is walking the dogs? I looked at that back on a
different definitions. Was there one that you can read that's well, okay,
read the first definition that comes up. How about that just the very first
thing. There were a couple for um, smoking weed walking the dog.
One is we're wearing pajamas but letting your wiener hang out over the pajamas.
That's funny, but no, I've done that. One is performing Flacio while
the song walking the Dog is like you're getting there, getting warmer. Hold
up, I have to pull back up. You're getting there, You're getting
there. Yeah, you know we could had Well, no I can't.
It's not correct yet. No, it's not correct. Maybe you made it
up? No idea? What can you say this? Can you say this?
Well, of course you can say anything. Well, well, I
don't know we should is the one a freaking paragraph? He's probably Are you
like, I don't know if I should read? You know? Are you
editing it? Hand job? No? I your friend or co worker's wife
on the down his desk work for No? No, that doesn't sound intriguing,
intguing funny? Um yeah, the act of male pleasure, pleasuring oneself
while walking around your own bedroom walk. No, that wasn't either. Oh
my god, saying to your internet friends that you're going to walk the dog,
but instead you are pleasuring yourself. It has something to do with what
flea show? And what was the other thing you said that went with that?
I don't know. It's about a blow job? Whatever? Enough enough,
I think that we should talk about something before we go into the commercials,
because that's not fair to work sponsors. Right after that, No,
what do you want to talk? I want to know? I have a
question, you filthy minks? What is it? If we're gonna go around
the room, okay, if we just if we were all strangers and we
just saw each other, what would you think we each did for a living?
You, I think you were a prostitute stopping stripping. I would stop
it for real. If you just saw me, like, I don't know,
pumping gas at the gas station, what would you think my profession maybe
was work in the corner? I would say, this girl probably spends a
lot of time on offer up. I really am I starting to look like
somebody that like champagne girl, strip club manager? Oh what like the line
like managing the lineup and the girls? I got the feminine touch. I
want you guys to be dead serious if I'm being dead serious, No,
you're not. If I think you genuinely would have been a strip club manager,
that's I don't think that. I like that. Oh well, that's
empowering because I feel like somebody that would manage a strip club might be a
little rundown. That's sex. I'm just saying that because it's all that's a
tough job, and we're up late nights. Yeah, because your radio hours
weren't abnormal, i'd say phone sex operator. No, I would think I
would think not playing gamer, I would think that you worked at MAC.
I would think webcam sex operator. I don't know um secretary. Maybe oh,
front desk, front desk person. Yeah, I don't like I could
be definitely used to be a stripper, but the guy who's hired you because
he wanted to keep you closer and cheaper Hooters manager. What about like I
could be a money manager? What if I was attorney? No? No,
you scream bad financial decisions. Definitely not an attorney. Look, not
an attorney? Why doctor? No? How about somebody a real estate agent?
Now? Yeah? Why selling alcohol boulevard? It's yeah, it's like
it's closer, it's definitely closer, but it's now you wouldn't I couldn't see
the real turn a spa at a really nice hotel manager. Maybe I'm a
SEUs. I guess you being like an event manager, okay, like you
boss people around the events. It would all depend on how you were dressed.
What you're wearing out stripper. I'm wearing a literally a T shirt.
Yeah, and you have it like tied up. I know, because I
wanted to be cute. But I don't want my stomach to show. So
there's that. I don't know why I've done I've done I've done the opposite.
My stomach did show, but I just wanted to be cute. It
was long. I wanted to shorten it. Whatever. I don't have to
explain myself to you, Eric, you would be I get see Eric being
a stylist. I feel like he just screams that, Oh my god,
you guys might as well or a stripper, take out and get over,
get it over with. If he was like both of those, if he
was like you and he was like, oh, I perform for the Magic
Mike Show, I'd be like, of course you do. Course you What
do you think? What? What do you honestly think Brian does? I
would think that Brian was involved in like filmmaking. Yeah, yeah, bullshit.
If you just saw him on the street. Okay, missus stripper walker,
you guys get like good jobs, and then you're giving me the most
lowest of the low according to society. According I can think of something lower
than stripper. I can too. Yes, what well, drug dealer?
Oh I'm not saying even did that. I know. I am saying you
do not seem like a drug dealer. No, I don't look like a
drug deal No do look it's like a stay at home mom. Maybe like
a drug kingpin. No, I would not. I would not say that
she looks like a stay at home mom. He said, I look like
I could be a drug king. I would honestly, I would say.
I would say, probably like a restaurant manager. Or yeah, I can
see that. What restaurant, like a nice one or you run an exsy
store. I don't mean like like a McDonald's night man, I want to
know what restaurant, right, I would say, no, no, no,
I would say like like one in del Mar or no, like mill
Floor, thank you, eric a chain, not like your own thing.
It would definitely be a chaman, like like a staff, like a chili
cheesecake factory. That might oh my god, daddy's no, actually maybe oh
no, at this point, yeah, Hooters is a sit down restaurant,
isn't it? Or yeah, I don't know, oh Hooters maybe yeah a
Hooters manager. Maybe do I wear the outfit or do I get to wear
a real clothes you wear real clothes? Okay, hown you guys suck ass?
Or or I'm a soused but like when those traveling the suses that comes
to your house. Oh yeah, that's not bad. You probably give happy
Oh no, if you give me the code word that would that be because
she's pumping gas and looking like a glazed donutes that they now do you?
How does one ask for that? Is it? Is there like a sign
that you give that. Yeah, it's like, yeah, it's you,
it's you, it's your boner. Yeah, hey, hey, you want
to suck my dick? So so they pay, Okay, so they you
do the back first and they flip you you over. If you have a
bonner don't then they may say, hey, I think you have to like
know that that offers that. Yeah, I don't. If you don't know
and you want it, how do you? I mean maybe you can just
ask they I mean they can't rest You're like, hey, while you're down
there. Yeah, I think there's some kind of code word or something maybe
or like it's not gonna suck itself like a sign or something. Maybe that's
what the sign of that thumbs up like keep going going, oh god,
yeah, I don't know. Okay, let let right now next, right
now, we're gonna stop for one second. Ready, yes, And I
wanted all to take a deep breath ready and let it out all the negative,
bad, weird stuff we talked about, gone, what's so negative about
a hand job. Yeah, I some people like those. Some strippers are
probably being strippers too. Don't know why that's negative. Yeah, I always
thought that was my fantasy, is to be a stripper. Well you still
can, No, I can at this stage, No way. Don't want
to see me older man. Oh yeah, even younger dudes. Are you
kidding? Younger dudes for teacher MILFs? Yeah? Yeah, I mean Foggy
had that song milf money, remember that, I would not make it here,
got ya gota milf? Okay, Well, if you moved in Miami
for one hundred percent, would be rich in Miami. You think you honestly
think I could get a job stripping in Miami. Yeah, Miami's dirty.
You could get a job stripping here. No way, I'd have to go
to Barstow Sparks, Habits, Orsina. They got steel like Lake Elson or
like something lakeside, oh, lake side, lake side. Yeah, you
could definitely manage like illegal gambling. Maybe there was like a legal gambling rooms.
You could definitely, yeah, manager there. So anything that's kind of
seedy and illegal is something that you look at me. Not illegal, It's
not illegal. I'm just saying you look at me, stranger, you look
at me and you think said secretary or event manager. You said that after
many many other things. All right, now we're gonna talk. We're stopping
this talk. I can though, why not? He just doesn't get cooker.
Yes, but definitely definitely like, yeah, oh you do. What
about an escort? Am I not cute enough? Well, you're totally cute
enough. No, I mean, isn't. I don't know, I don't
know what looks like. But you're you're kind of strong will. I don't
know, I know maybe that's a good thing for escorts, but maybe yeah,
maybe they like that. Yeah, you're not strong will enough to be
a dominatrix. You're just like, oh no, she had a guy that
wanted her to put a high heeled shoot in his ear. But you're just
like you're just like it's almost like no filter assertive rather than like dominative.
I know I wouldn't be able to do it. Yeah, I think you
would. If I listen, if I if I if I walked up to
you while you were pumping gas at a gas station, said hey, listen,
I'd like you to take me back to your place and beat me within
an inch of my life and I'll give you one hundred grand. Okay,
where's your place? You'd have a meat tenderizing mallet so fast. Okay,
you know what I have decided what this is not? Okay? What the
hairstyle? Yeah yeah, yeah, it's definitely affecting the jobs I'm giving you.
Yeah. Maybe it is maybe like a sixties barber, but not a
very good one. I can't Mary k K saleswoman. Oh yeah, see,
I said make up. I said, yeah, said no, not
not mac but Mary kay. Yeah, okay, Now you're like a fashion
model who didn't know when to retire pastor prime. Yeah. Oh all right.
Let's get to our fabulous sponsors. And one of them, my god,
A Wortzler. I don't know what they stands for now, I said
j A is his middle name, A J J A y A Wortzler Capital
Growth thing dot com. There you go. He is such a good guy.
He's become a good friend of mine. And I'm proud to say that
he's my friend because he's a he's a good, good family man. He's
a great guy. And when were woman to the party at the bed where
he when we first met him, yes, and we're like, oh my
God, I want to be friends with this guy. This is how you're
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at work all the time. He answers emails. What's the email? Oh,
thank you for asking. It's j A y W at Capital crowthing dot
com. And the phone number you have memorizedism is eight five five five two
six nine six zero. I'm sorry I talked over you again. Thank you
very much, do it again five five five two six nine six zero.
Okay, that's it anyway, And and you're just forgetting something. He does
have a website. It is www dot Capital Crowth think do there you go.
Thanks Jerry bro, thank you. We love you are a gentleman.
Okay, so oh now we need to talk about SCAD, the five K
that I'm in seeing in September, but you gotta sign up soon. Here's
the advertisement. Thank you SCAT, Thank you. We want you to mark
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Laura Cane after dark dot com look for the link. Okay, good,
Yes, you need to thank you so much again, Laura Cane after dark
dot com for all the information on both of our sponsors. Yes, okay,
let me take it. Thank you my dinner. Oh wow, when
did you start wearing dependence? Look at that? Apparently I haven't been getting
enough nutritions so these so what a shocker? You have been getting enough pictures
and Red Bull don't have our nutritions. I haven't had a Red Bull in
at least I want to say two weeks. Okay, I just finished a
bag of sour gummy Bears that I had for one week, one full week,
one bag. Thank you. So now you're drinking in sure? Yes?
Did it come with a pack of ax? There's a couple of diapers
and no. But this is now here's my host chat. Oh boy,
So Antonio and I okay, So Antonio lives here, not full time,
but part of the time. It's a long story. But he helps me
pay the rent and he helps round the house. It's a great situation anyway.
So this Saturday, well, we have a garage that's filled with a
bunch of bags of clothes that my old clothes, and he collects clothes to
give to people down in Mexico who are less fortunate. We're always bringing stuff
down there all the time, all the time, and people give us things,
clothes and furniture to give to people down there. Right, okay,
so we've been doing this consistently. Well, you can't take a big ton
of stuff over the border without being charged for it, so we've had to
take it kind of piece by piece without so you're not like noticed. So
long story short, My garage is a disaster. It is packed with stuff.
So we decided, why don't we check out the deal at the Spring
Valley Swap Me. Oh, I guess see what it takes to get a
space, set it up and sell all the crap we have in there,
like maybe each piece of clothing fifty cents or a dollar or whatever, like
and have the nice, my nice jackets that I want to sell on a
rack and those could be like three dollars or five dollars. So we went
to the Spring Valley Swap Meat on Saturday, and it's huge. By the
way, I don't know if you've ever been. I have not. Oh,
please let me take you there, please, oh please let me take
you please. I would rather have a chainsaw than a month Eric. Just
your facial that's not his jam. But it was very I know. But
it was very hot. And there's no shade at all, hardly you might
sweat. No, this is I know, Eric. And there's probably the
smells of a lot of greasy food being cooked. Yeah, nope, Oh
my god, so many good deals. But so I bought him. Okay,
so this guy was selling Oh god, okay, he was a good
salesman. He had this booth. Hey, you over there, I want
you to try something. He gets a bottle of water and he puts two
scoops the two scoops of green stuff and he goes it has this imino acids
and this and this and this and this and this and this and this,
and you will take a poop that is so huge you won't believe it.
All that stuff that's been in your stomach for so long. I'm like,
that sounds all actually not bad. So he gave me a full bottle of
it right before I even bought it. I drank it and then he's like,
I'll give you two for twenty dollars I'll throw in this macha macha stuff
that's supposed to make you feel better and get rid of your anxiety. I
don't know. It's probably all what do you call it? Not horse shit?
What do you call it? Horse oil? Snake oil? Yeah?
And you bought it? Yes? How much was it? Twenty dollars and
then ten dollars thirty dollars for some green crushed up I can really mow the
lawn, crush it up, dried out. Let's sell to you it has
all these nutrients in it. Oh does it? Does it? Or is
that what you just told you? And it's supposed to cleanse and get rid
of everything. Well, I gotta say, since Saturday, since drinking that
green bottle this big, I haven't taken a poop. So it didn't work.
What a shocker? Where's my big giant clean out the entire don't it
stops? Yes, they too about coal and cleanse and all those things.
US procedure sellium husk every single time. It works for me. It was
hard for me to drink that. Oh, I know, I know,
I know it's worth it. It's worth it, I guess. Really,
one of these days I'm gonna wear disguise and come to your front door and
sell you something. I'll buy it, Yeah, I will buy it.
This guy was such a good salesman, Like I can't believe. I can't
believe I did that. I sell you a money printing machine that literally money
for one hundred bucks, and you'll buy six of our mocka Maca stuff.
Apparently it comes from like Peru or something, and it's supposed to help with
anxiety and look up Maaca please, and I'm like, this is what I
need right now because my anxiety is through the roof now that I'm off of
one of my meds right which I'll get better, but I'm like, okay,
something natural can help with that. Great. Well, I can't seem
to drink it anymore because it's really thick. And why did I do this?
I know I don't do this kind of sem I buy like protein powder.
I don't even drink that because I kind of get sick of it out.
You're not talking about macha right, No, okay, well mocka Maca
drink doesn't exist. That was his term for it. Oh my god,
this is but this is disaster. Like I'm gonna say, this is snake
will you know, here's cancer. It takes away, it makes you money.
You start manifest money, Laura, I'm gonna start money. I'm gonna
taking all your money. And oh that's a home printed label. Oh my,
oh Jesus, we have this super mega was in Spanish. Mm hmm
new formula. No, that's not in Spanish. Okay, so it has
I can't read. But it's got all these things in it. Okay,
it's gonna okay, here it is. It's got all these things in it.
Right. Well, the mockam marca. It's mockam mockam moca, three
macas. Oh, well, that makes it everything dietary supplement, natural m
aca. Did you spell it that way? Spell it that way and then
look it up and then eat your words, and then I can't read anything
else about cheese. I'll read it, okay, So it it lists them
in the order of twelve. Oh it's Oh it's made in Chula Vista.
That's well, then that's great. It's local. First to researchers, all
is maca maca, maca, macaroni and cheese. It's a song for kids.
There you go, doesn't exist. Well, first, we'll keep looking
down the way guana germ. It looks like it's chlorophyll um spiroluna. Yeah,
I've heard of that. That's supposed to be good. More nego,
what about ginger be pollen, moca root, macca gain, black tea flat
seed. See, I don't know. It probably smells like coca dude.
Well, you're supposed to put like honey in it with it. Okay,
Well it doesn't smell so bad. This literally looks like lawn shavings. Ryan,
damn it. Did you find it? It doesn't exist. I'm not
I'm not saying it's a scam. Scam. It's not like it was not
on the internet. M Aca. Yeah, it doesn't exist. He told
me it was like from this far off land. Oh yeah, from scams
Friendly Isle of Chad America or something night Stay of Scam America. Stop it.
Well, anyway, it's called mister mcguay, I don't know what that
is. It came with it? Is that the honey, because I think
that's the honey you're supposed to put in with it to make it taste good.
You bought honey for you for what. I'm gonna be pooping like a
fool, and I'm gonna be so anxiety free and smart. Sure you'll be
so anxious that you won't poop. All right, whatever, this is John's
my host chat. Great. Oh one more thing, Yeah, I have
another question. Uh huh. What is a store that you could never work
at because you would spend your entire paycheck there? Oh that bathroom beyond Amazon?
Can't work? No, a store like I couldn't work at Home Goods
for example. Oh, I couldn't either. There's no freaking way. I
would never bring home a dime. I couldn't work at Ross. I wouldn't
be able to work at Petco because all the stuff for all my elvis,
all those little things he needs, and all the fun things I buy him
free people, I couldn't work there, or Nordstrom or Target even so,
family, what you're telling me is you can never get a job. No.
She could basically work nowhere. I couldn't work at Michael's. No.
I couldn't work at a thrift store because I help me, I spent four
d I bought four hundred yards of sharp material. Do you did you say
you can't? You couldn't work at You couldn't work at Trader Joe's. No,
because I would spend all my money. No, you wouldn't. I
love vegetables and fruit there. They've got a lot of other things there too.
Yeah, you would be able to work there. They I home Depot,
only the gardening department, though I love that, And then Alta Sephora
any of the makeup. She could never work. What about you, guys?
Is there any place that you would have been? Like? He said?
Best Buy? Would? I couldn't work at Home Goods. I couldn't
work somewhere like Bloomingdale's or Nordstrom. No, I would never work at nordstro
Would you couldn't work at Zara? Problem? No, I couldn't work at
Zara. I couldn't work at John Varvados. There's a lot of places I
couldn't work. I couldn't work um and so I couldn't work at Gucci or
I couldn't work on No, I couldn't work Gucci would hire you? I
know, I you know? What did you say? Gudci wouldn't hire me?
Her? Oh oh, Gucci would hire the hell I you? Oh
my god? What do you make? I really don't pay that much,
though they probably It's probably like minimum mish, but a little more discount.
Maybe gosh, I'll find out. I'll find out for from somebody. I'll
figure it out. I want to know how much Gucci gets, and I
want to know how much Louis Vaton people will get for their have a friend
that works for Louis Vaton, I'll ask ask, yes, don't I want
to know if they get like some scream in the showroom, like at the
store, yeah, I'll ask her. Because they get to carry around a
little purse with them when, like all the salespeople on the field, they
probably have to turn it in at the end of I talked to one that
you have to they have to buy it to work there. Oh you do,
you can keep your little they ask get a deal on it's tiny.
It's like a little tiny one. They're like, oh, it's only seven
hundred dollars and you haven't even started here yet. Maybe I'm wrong making things
all right? What's your host? Chat? So? Yeah, how is
the show? Heather McDonald was great? Okay, so she had two opening
actions. Let's give her podcast all the juicy scoop, hilarious, isn't it
funny? Really good? I like her a lot, and she was really
good. It was completely packed. Humphreeze. Yes, and I have to
give a shout out to the women. They were dressed up. Oh yeah,
I bet men. Were there any men there? There were a couple.
But it was hilarious to see the guys with their girlfriends or wives.
They looked like they were being taken to because of like a colonoscopy. Like
they were not smiling, they were not talks about like reality TV stuff like
the guys did not care about kill me now? Yeah, oh my god.
Did she have a guest or anybody know what? She had two opening
acts? So she had Justin Martindale and Chris ran Joel and they were,
oh, I love him. Yeah. Did she do any impressions like she
knows how she does the Housewives? And she didn't. She actually really didn't
talk about the Housewives that much. It was mainly about like her family and
stuff like that. Yeah, she grow into vander Pump at all, or
at the very beginning she did. She did, Yeah that's fun. Well
good, I'm glad it's pack. That must make her feel really good,
can pack a house? It was good. And she looked great. Oh
yeah, high Heather, and she looks good in a bikini because you see
the bikini pick. Yeah, she's got a great body and good all right,
guess what hasn't happened in a while? But what's gonna happen to night?
What snappy facts? Which hold Rando facts facts in it? But I
have a new No, that's all I got. No I have is this
Rando it's his Rando news. Well do you want to say that for random
news? No? Because this is what I meant. I meant snappy facts.
And you can keep the music playing through the whole thing. Don't ride
on my arm again. It was for two days I had writing on my
own or elevator music. No, listen, isn't that great? Though?
It saw what I wrote the last time? Isn't this pleasant? This is
snappy facts. Creed has sold more albums in the United States than Jimmy Hendrix.
Who's that Creed? Yeah, Scott's Dap, Creed, clever Head,
No, just Creed the band? Oh my god. Whatever. You don't
hone in on something, you home in on its agree. You can hone
your skills because home means to sharpen, it means to narrow something down.
But you home in on things because home means to target accurately. Don't argue
you are in the in the wrong mister. I'm holding down the answer.
Don't you dare try to push back at snappy facts. These are all real.
Where'd you get these? Buzzbeed? Please? No, and please start
the music again because it needs to play the whole time. Led, led
Zeppelin, r EM, and depeche Mode have never had a number one single,
but Rihanna I had fourteen Wow called the sack literally translates to butt of
the bag in French, of the bag. I didn't throwing up. I
didn't do especially when you're a kid. Oh my god, I have kids.
The New York Times has approximately sixteen hundred obituaries pre written, so they're
ready to go when certain people die. Sixteen hundred. Yeah, don't read
over my shoulder. You know how much that bothers me? Do I look
like I'm reading over your shoulder? On so time? Did they come over
the steen shoulder? Why? God, nothing bothers me more than that?
Why without throwing up? Does that bother you more? Yes? But that's
a close second. Because I want to surprise you with these fucks. Don't
read them out of time? Look, lig and Brian, Yeah, play
my music again, drowning me out with it. The Internet as we know
it is just around twelve thousand, five hundred days old. Mindy Cone from
the Facts of Life is godmother to two of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's kids.
Wow. Believed to be Knox and Vivian. Who are the twins and
they are going to be fifteen next month? Wow? I know. The
term pipe dream comes from the fantasies that people would have when they smoked opium.
Have you ever used that term? It's a pipe dream. No,
don't do that. It's a pipe it's kind of old people. Here you
go, Brian, here's a couple for you. Steven Spielberg turned out an
offered to direct the first Harry Potter movie because he thought it wouldn't be challenging,
and he thoughts it should have been animated. I don't think you should
have directed it. Robin Williams wanted to play the role of Hagrid in Harry
Potter Potter, but the producers had a rule that they would only cast British
actors, so they said, sorry, no, thank you to Robin Williams.
But you know what, the guy who did play Hagrid was pretty darn
great. He's dead now, I know. So as Tupac Shakur, who
yeah who as a kid studied ballet and even played the role of the mouse
King and the Nutcracker that I cannot imagine me either. Don't argue with snappy
packs. He also Donna? He what tupa Donna humpter? But yeah,
like our closes are with clothes, like what without clothes? He using his
Wiener? Do you know they had Okay, oh my god, the movie
A History of Violence? Do you know this is? Yes? I do.
That was the very last movie to be released on a VHS tape v
HS tape, and that was back in two thousand and six. The first
fully digital like animated movie was the first digital animated full what four story?
Oh oh wow? That was interesting, more interesting than all of my facts
combined. Yeah, one more, I have two more. The word dude
was used one hundred and sixty one times in The Big Lebowski. The F
word was used two hundred and ninety two times, just about as much as
like last week, we used it a lot last week you did? Yeah,
not me? Oh boy? And Jeff Bridges said man one hundred and
forty seven times. Wow, what a snappy fact that was. That was
one more I know. I know the US has more millionaires than Sweden has
people. There are more than eleven point million American households that now have a
net worth of over one million, versus just ten point four million people in
Sweden. Los Angeles has a bigger populations in Sweden. I your Sweden is
what isn't Sweden supposed to be like the happiest place to live? Where is
that? Finland? It's the Nordic countries. That's because there they have a
ton of oil, so they have a ton of money in the government with
like no one to spend it on because they have such a small population,
so they have to throw money at everything, and so their healthcare is probably
we should go there. They just throw money at you know. They have
really strict integration though, because they don't want more people. They'd want me,
they would because she's a blonde. Amazon find out that's a rarity.
They didn't see you and they go, oh my good dude, look like
you strip. That was really bad and enough of that talk. Yeah,
Eric, sorry, quit it. New style trend Oh God from TikTok Okay,
we're taking here on news from TikTok trend. Yeah, I'm just telling
you the new trend in in clothing and the way you present yourself is to
wear shoes that don't match your outfits. Oh no, that's like the new
thing. Everybody's doing it, where something completely off opposite of what you are
wearing clothes wise, No, thank you on your sneakers or you're whatever.
I'd already talked about that and basically that's all I have. I have one
more thing, what I started watching The Idol. Oh okay, wait,
both on HBO Max. Okay, thoughts, I'm in Oh wait, let's
say what it is. First. The Idol stars Johnny Depp's daughter, Lily
Rose Depp, who is gorgeous and like the perfect body, tiny little thing
on the weekend, yes, whose acting ability is not great. I'm on
episode three and it is glaring how bad it is. Yeah, it's not
good. Um. I just hope that she is never seen without a cigarette
in her hand. Never, So I'm hoping that smoking just kind of comes.
Do you get through the whole thing? Did you see the ice cube
scene? No? Not yet? Okay, you so you saw the beginning
and she's getting her picture taken and her boobs and nips are hanging out,
and then the is on the face, and then her pleasuring herself, then
him putting the scarf over her head and cutting a hole in the mouth,
the mouth down on her vat I mean, not the mouth, the ice
cube went down her vage. Oh, yes, I see that. Yes.
And the second the second episode, she pleasures herself again, yes,
using something lots of pleasuring of oneself, and it's just kind of sad.
It's just kind of depressing because she's very yeah, and it's kind of like
being like, okay, well she's mentally ill, big deal, Like is
supposed to be Brittany, Like who is this? Yeah, it's just supposed
to be And he looks scummy. He's supposed to be scummy, Yeah,
and he is. But he's starting to now like take things over and it's
yeah, not good. And people like all her people are like, who
the hell is this guy? I don't know. I like his voice,
like his talking voice. I do love his music though, Yeah, I
like his music with Michael Jackson's great singing away terrible voice to listen to them
talk totally, that's that's really crazy. And then I watched season two.
The first two episodes are out now, the Sex and the City reboot,
and just like that thing. No, oh, I say, no,
thanks my that's like, my god. People, if you drank chardonnay like
boxed wine, you definitely would like Sex and City. It just was awful.
Thank you? Oh my god, I thought you were going to go
on and on about how great it is. I don't find it interesting anymore.
It was sexy, ever good. It was great first, Yes,
it was really good. It was really it was different. It was nothing
like it was. Yeah, it was cool, and it wasn't that.
Yes, you were too young, Brian, you were too young to like
really and they weren't. But you were too young to like like it.
They weren't, you know, these eighteen year old girls. They were mature
women. And um, but this there's too many characters, there's too many
subplots, there's too much. It is and I I no disrespect. Oh,
I am so sick and tired of the Miranda Chay thing. I want
to kill myself. What's that She's a lesbian and she's followed her to La
It's so bad, and she's naked all the time, Miranda. Yes,
like fully you can see your old bush and old boob. How is the
cameo by hasn't happened yet? Oh? Okay, well that that is new,
so it's not surprised. It's it's just a phone call. Oh god.
So it's like but they're only putting out like one episode a week,
so you have to wait for it. Okay, but so far I am
not impressed. Um. I'm glad that you said that we can be friends
again, because if you were, we loved it. I just don't know
if I can appreciate your taste anymore. I'm sorry, be friends again kind
of a little. It's hit miss, It's hit miss. It is.
There are some movies you think are good though, I think whatever it's true
though. Whatever, Um, one more question then we're gonna end this.
Yes, it's quick. Yes. Do you guys take naps? Yes?
Um, sometimes, not super often anymore. I used to take a lot
of naps. Oh I was working angling to college. Tell you every day.
Researchers say that nappers tend to have bigger brains. Their brains don't shrink
as fast as they get older. Are you saying it because you sleep all
day. Oh, you've got the biggest brain in the room. Never got
in bed, No, I just sleep in. I haven't taken a nap
because I sleep in so much because I don't know what I'm doing. You
got bed? No, no, no, this is not the line of
questioning happening right. I was curious, like ten today, I got out
of bed at um, God, what time was it? Because all we
were up late because we had my my daughter's birthday dinner noon. So I
went to bed. I went to bed at three A because I was listening
to stuff on I was doing stuff and manifesting. Thank you. Yeah.
I just want to say, I have access to our YouTube channel, so
I do see Laura suggested YouTube videos and they're all No, I gave access
to all that ship Oh god, I don't snoop. All I do is
I see the top of the home page and I click on our rafter go
to our channel, and wow, you're welcome. I was doing that channel.
I was going, you thumbnails for a video, so you're welcome.
But they literally are all sleep meditation, manifestation wealth videos. One time I
opened YouTube and I still signed it. I was like, what the fuck?
I don't I listen to this ship fall asleep but supposed to help me?
Oh lord, anyway, So I don't take naps anymore, but I
used to do, and I love them, and I have a big brain,
and you do, and you do start manipulating her search results. So
I'm gonna start typing them, like how do you get a boyfriend? How
do you get laid? So like that's a swamit sounds disgusting. Help you
go to sleep, Brian, don't do it, don't even think about it.
I will rip. I will change my password in five seconds. Not
that I have, you know whatever, add whatever you want. I'll just
gloss right over. I won't stop on it. Let me that. And
they're muted until you press them anyway, So up there that No, it'll
be when you fall asleep, and the next suggestive of your PA that'll be
my subconscious. Okay you guys, thank you. That's it. We're done.
Happy weekend. We're gonna have a good one this weekend. I think
I'm gonna go to Sequan true and um, I don't know what. I
only am allow myself to gamble fifty dollars, so gambled on. I'll either
play roulette you Yeah, you or I do the um stop machines. Okay,
you should just take keep your mind go home. I know played Black
Jacker poker. Those are the only games with like winning odds, and they
don't have winning odds, but they have the the highest of the odds have
the lowest losing odds. I have to refresh my Game's not hard, it's
not hard. No, I'm not gonna play poker. Poker has too many
things going on. And but beginner's luck, you know, you never do
exists. Play black Jacket's big fifty dollars is gonna get me far another It
can't be a free rule, you never know? Yeah, no, I'm
you know, what do you call whales? So you might be lucky to
get a drink camp? Oh my god? Do they even do that anymore?
Do they come around with free drinks? Still? I don't. In
Vegas they do, Yeah, they still do. They do. Rona has
the car and Sequana. You can't drink a Barona alcohol? Oh no,
no, no, my favorite one. I love s Quan. I just
love their hotel. Actually, really streak you did you have a little gambling
problem problem? Yeah? What does that? You mean? A good one?
It wasn't the problem because I didn't lose a lot of money here?
What were you playing? Mostly black jack? I played a lot of black
jack and you what were you winning? Like? What what are we talking?
Hundreds? Thousands? The most I ever walked away with it was like
six hundred bucks, okay at eighteen. At eighteen, that's I had a
friend walking with five and walking with a thousand. So I mean, yeah,
okay, maybe I'll play the tables. I'll take some time and play
the table. You're finally lose, but like, thank you, thank you
for that. The only played black jack if there's like a five arm in
the mum, okay, otherwise it's not worth it. All right, all
right, thank you for the advice. I maybe will take it. I
think any parting words from you, mister rumor, No you want to go,
oh I'm so bad, but I'm gonna make you watch a video you
I know you are, I know you are? You you loft like five
minutes ago, I think, okay, you must have a job here.
Yeah I knew you were going to say that. I know I know.
All right, okay, guys, I love you, Thank you, Capital
Growth, thank thank you Scedattle five K and love your podcast. Love your
podcast. Wow. If someone wants to leave, I haven't said it yet.
Um I just want to touch on a couple of things before you saying
off here. Love you, my sweet babies. Love you by