WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.640 --> 00:00:04.679 Bottled Up Bitches is hosted by a horny Mary couple. Content may include adult 2 00:00:04.759 --> 00:00:08.919 language and themes. Check the description for more details. Your discretion is advised. 3 00:00:13.599 --> 00:00:18.519 It's season three. Welcome to Bottled Up Bitches, your favorite sex podcast 4 00:00:18.640 --> 00:00:23.000 with me Rihanna Campbell and Me producer Mana Adam Rihanna. Are you ready for 5 00:00:23.079 --> 00:00:25.839 some hot topics and even hotter guests? Well, you know, I am. 6 00:00:25.960 --> 00:00:32.039 Let's fucking do this. See Horny Bitches. Hi Adam, Hi, 7 00:00:32.200 --> 00:00:36.399 dy ho neighborina. I like that you said that. Yeah, how's your 8 00:00:36.439 --> 00:00:40.359 day going? Uh? Pretty good? Exhausting, it's been a day. 9 00:00:40.399 --> 00:00:44.320 It's been a day. We have so much happening this month. Uh well 10 00:00:44.439 --> 00:00:47.920 January, February, times, um, all the things going on. But 11 00:00:48.359 --> 00:00:52.719 it's going good. Uh. Can we make a fun announcement? Okay, 12 00:00:52.759 --> 00:00:56.719 I don't know what it's being announced. I'm announcing that we are being featured 13 00:00:56.799 --> 00:01:00.880 in the two Soon Erotica Art Show. Yeah it's okay, I'm excited. 14 00:01:00.960 --> 00:01:03.640 That's going to be in March, So we will be up there for two 15 00:01:03.680 --> 00:01:10.920 weekends in March. We're building a little confession booth and it's gonna be so 16 00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:17.879 much fun and yeah, I'm excited to meet people in the industry and just 17 00:01:17.959 --> 00:01:21.239 new people artists, and you know, maybe we'll get some fun guests out 18 00:01:21.239 --> 00:01:23.519 of that. Yeah, it's gonna be a good time. No, I'm 19 00:01:23.519 --> 00:01:26.959 really looking forward to it. Yeah, you've got started on the boothsday and 20 00:01:26.040 --> 00:01:30.200 it made it really real as it sunk in at all. But I'm quite 21 00:01:30.200 --> 00:01:34.040 excited about that. So we've got a lot coming coming down the pipe a 22 00:01:34.120 --> 00:01:41.040 very short amount of time. We Yeah, well, I'm super stoked at 23 00:01:41.079 --> 00:01:45.040 per huge about this episode. We record this episode probably over a month ago. 24 00:01:45.439 --> 00:01:48.359 Yeah, this one we recorded, we recorded a hot minute. Yeah, 25 00:01:48.359 --> 00:01:52.280 it's been a while, so rehearing it with your editing and all that 26 00:01:52.319 --> 00:01:57.840 good stuff just made it all that more exciting listening to it all over again. 27 00:01:57.879 --> 00:02:04.480 We're gonna get to talk to Missy Bender about her swinging lifestyle and her 28 00:02:04.680 --> 00:02:12.560 different companies because she her company hosts swinging events and parties, and it was 29 00:02:12.759 --> 00:02:17.000 a delight learning about that environment and what all goes into it and the prep 30 00:02:17.039 --> 00:02:23.360 work, and it's just a little insight into a world that we truly just 31 00:02:23.360 --> 00:02:27.400 don't know anything about. Yeah, No, I and I think we kind 32 00:02:27.439 --> 00:02:30.840 of bring it up in the in the episode. But there's kind of like 33 00:02:30.879 --> 00:02:32.879 this idea I feel like a lot of people have about the swinging lifestyle, 34 00:02:34.319 --> 00:02:37.520 and it was fun to kind of get a very eye opening like, no, 35 00:02:37.719 --> 00:02:40.319 here's what it actually is and why what all it entails? And it 36 00:02:40.400 --> 00:02:45.120 was just it was an enjoyable episode to learn. It was a good learning 37 00:02:45.159 --> 00:02:47.560 episode. I feel like, oh yeah, it was an eye opening experience. 38 00:02:47.599 --> 00:02:53.319 And I do love that she was introduced via family. She was introduced 39 00:02:53.439 --> 00:02:58.560 via family, and oh yes, that's so funny. Yes, yes, 40 00:02:58.639 --> 00:03:02.000 yes, yes, swinging lifestyle started because of our Yeah, hysterical, which 41 00:03:02.360 --> 00:03:05.919 it sounds worse than Yeah, it sounds worse than Listen to the episode. 42 00:03:06.560 --> 00:03:08.360 Um no, that's just the funnest fact. I love. I love re 43 00:03:08.479 --> 00:03:13.039 listening to that part. Um. But yeah, do you have anything that 44 00:03:13.080 --> 00:03:17.479 you want to announce or anything you'd like to add? No, No, 45 00:03:19.560 --> 00:03:22.759 I can't think of anything. Okay, go check out our patreon. Go 46 00:03:22.879 --> 00:03:25.000 check out the patreon. Yeah, read the blog, read the blog. 47 00:03:25.159 --> 00:03:29.360 Go read the blog, leave a review, leave a review, like us, 48 00:03:29.639 --> 00:03:32.520 subscribe us, tell your friends all that stuff, all the key things. 49 00:03:32.599 --> 00:03:37.560 But without further ado, enjoy this conversation with Missy Bender. If you 50 00:03:37.599 --> 00:03:40.719 hate this show, don't leave a review. They will, They'll convert it. 51 00:03:43.000 --> 00:03:54.759 They have they have previously. So what about you? You have so 52 00:03:54.800 --> 00:04:00.240 many entities. I was squirrelling through your website and read your blog and you 53 00:04:00.280 --> 00:04:05.960 also have Mizzy's boutique and Mindbender Party. So tell me a little bit about 54 00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:12.680 that and how you got into the industry. Oh so I got into it 55 00:04:12.719 --> 00:04:17.439 because my partner, Spencer, who owns Mindbender Parties. All right, well, 56 00:04:17.519 --> 00:04:21.480 no, first, my aunt took me to a swinger's meet and greet 57 00:04:21.759 --> 00:04:27.920 that I did not know was a swingers meet and greet, and so Spencer 58 00:04:27.959 --> 00:04:30.759 happened to be the one throwing the meet and greet and she was like, 59 00:04:30.800 --> 00:04:34.040 oh, you know, this is my friend. And that was it. 60 00:04:34.439 --> 00:04:38.399 And then like I slowly started to understand like where I was and what was 61 00:04:38.439 --> 00:04:42.319 going on because somebody propositioned me to be in a threesome with their and I 62 00:04:42.360 --> 00:04:46.439 was like, I was married and I was in a very complicated situation, 63 00:04:46.720 --> 00:04:51.240 and yeah, I when I was in this environment that I saw, it 64 00:04:51.279 --> 00:04:57.360 was like so free and so just wow, everybody can just kind of be 65 00:04:57.439 --> 00:05:00.399 who they are for a minute. It started to kind of put my plan 66 00:05:00.480 --> 00:05:03.519 on where I was in life like kind of expedited it because I was really 67 00:05:03.519 --> 00:05:08.000 trying to leave my marriage, but I couldn't leave my marriage until my stepson 68 00:05:08.160 --> 00:05:13.600 graduated high school, and so I was like one year away from him graduating 69 00:05:13.680 --> 00:05:18.839 high school before I had gotten into this whole like swinger's lifestyle. And you 70 00:05:18.879 --> 00:05:21.439 know, that night when we went to the meet and greet, I didn't 71 00:05:21.439 --> 00:05:27.319 even really interact with anybody or even really know of like what the swingers lifestyle 72 00:05:27.560 --> 00:05:31.279 was. And it was until a couple days after that event Spencer found me 73 00:05:31.319 --> 00:05:36.120 on social media and started like chit chatting with me, and I don't know, 74 00:05:36.160 --> 00:05:41.399 it was just like a very comforting thing from where I currently was at 75 00:05:41.480 --> 00:05:45.120 the moment, and so I don't know, the universe kind of like worked 76 00:05:45.160 --> 00:05:48.279 in mysterious ways, and I feel like gave me Spencer as this light of 77 00:05:48.439 --> 00:05:51.439 like you could do and be anything that you want to and there's like a 78 00:05:51.480 --> 00:05:55.759 better life out there. And that's like how it all started. Four and 79 00:05:55.800 --> 00:06:00.000 a half years ago. I ended up like really expediting leaving my husband. 80 00:05:59.800 --> 00:06:02.319 I left the day that I took my steps on his road test and he 81 00:06:02.319 --> 00:06:06.360 passed his road tests, and I was up. My goodness, Well, 82 00:06:06.800 --> 00:06:12.360 just how established you look online and on social media. I would never have 83 00:06:12.439 --> 00:06:15.439 guessed that this has been going on for only four years. That's insane. 84 00:06:16.079 --> 00:06:21.680 Well, I have a very corporate background, so I used to again, 85 00:06:21.720 --> 00:06:28.360 the universe works in really weird ways because I worked at a multi billion dollar 86 00:06:28.439 --> 00:06:32.720 international company and supported the c suite. I supported the CEO, the CFO, 87 00:06:32.399 --> 00:06:38.279 the president of North America and all his vps in marketing, and was 88 00:06:38.319 --> 00:06:43.040 integrated in a lot of different kinds of projects and corporate social responsibility and you 89 00:06:43.079 --> 00:06:47.120 know, every aspect of this organization I was super integrated into. And at 90 00:06:47.160 --> 00:06:53.199 the same time that this whole life change of mind was happening, the organization 91 00:06:53.360 --> 00:06:57.879 was moving off of Long Island to New Jersey, and my job position was 92 00:06:57.920 --> 00:07:02.199 being eliminated because they needed somebody to work at the office there they couldn't have, 93 00:07:03.279 --> 00:07:05.800 you know, and I wasn't going to relocate so and I couldn't do 94 00:07:05.800 --> 00:07:12.160 it remotely. So at the same time, when I left my marriage, 95 00:07:12.279 --> 00:07:16.319 I pretty much had my job position eliminated too, like all within the same 96 00:07:16.360 --> 00:07:19.680 period of time, which allowed me to focus like more on this and kind 97 00:07:19.680 --> 00:07:25.720 of just dive right in and I mean, I can keep telling you more 98 00:07:25.720 --> 00:07:31.000 because the boutique became. The boutique really only was created because after I had 99 00:07:31.319 --> 00:07:34.879 finished my what is that called when they give you, oh, severance, 100 00:07:34.920 --> 00:07:39.480 When my severance was over and I had gone to unemployed, say, they 101 00:07:39.480 --> 00:07:44.519 gave me six months severance, which is very unusual. Yea, yeah right. 102 00:07:44.759 --> 00:07:47.680 They my company like really took care of me. And I was so 103 00:07:47.759 --> 00:07:51.319 grateful and so thankful because I, like, emotionally, I was in a 104 00:07:51.360 --> 00:07:57.519 really raw place because when I left, I left my stepson and I lost, 105 00:07:57.639 --> 00:08:00.560 you know, my relationship diminished with him, and it was a whole 106 00:08:00.600 --> 00:08:03.560 reason why I was staying and doing what I was doing was so I didn't 107 00:08:03.600 --> 00:08:07.560 lose him. So emotionally, I was not in a good place. So 108 00:08:07.600 --> 00:08:09.360 I was like, oh, thank you so much for giving me so much 109 00:08:09.399 --> 00:08:13.120 time for me to like personally regroup and figure out what I was doing. 110 00:08:13.680 --> 00:08:18.160 And so when it's time for me to go to unemployment and check out the 111 00:08:18.240 --> 00:08:22.360 unemployment resources, I kind of felt selfish because I was like, here, 112 00:08:22.439 --> 00:08:26.360 he was just so lucky to receive so much severant in my opinion, that 113 00:08:26.600 --> 00:08:30.560 I didn't want to be greedy, you know, And so Spencer was like, 114 00:08:30.680 --> 00:08:33.080 just go and check it out and see what they have to offer. 115 00:08:33.000 --> 00:08:37.879 And it turns out, because of my work history, New York State has 116 00:08:37.960 --> 00:08:41.960 this program that you have to apply to that if you get accepted into it, 117 00:08:43.120 --> 00:08:46.600 you have to create a business within New York State and they don't give 118 00:08:46.639 --> 00:08:50.600 you the financial funds to do it, but they do extend your unemployment thirteen 119 00:08:50.639 --> 00:08:56.600 weeks. But there's so many requirements that you need to produce them. Like 120 00:08:56.919 --> 00:08:58.879 you needed your business plan, you needed your marketing plan, you needed to 121 00:08:58.879 --> 00:09:03.559 show that you were like an actual corporation with your bank bank account. It 122 00:09:03.639 --> 00:09:07.759 was like all these different things and like weekly you had to keep on, 123 00:09:07.320 --> 00:09:11.960 you know, sending in your homework per se. And so I ended up 124 00:09:11.960 --> 00:09:16.720 getting accepted into the program, and that's kind of how Mizzy's boutique was created. 125 00:09:16.879 --> 00:09:22.320 So it's all this really weird universal together of like, thank you so 126 00:09:22.399 --> 00:09:26.679 much for you know, gracing me with such a humble journey. Yeah, 127 00:09:26.720 --> 00:09:31.200 so before we start, I wanted to start off by saying I feel like 128 00:09:31.360 --> 00:09:35.480 swingers is one of those terms that everyone kind of has an idea of what 129 00:09:35.559 --> 00:09:39.360 it is. Well, I had something before that. Okay, what a 130 00:09:39.399 --> 00:09:43.879 cool aunt. Oh yeah, yeah, can we talk about that? Can 131 00:09:43.919 --> 00:09:48.759 we talk about how she took you to Swingers? What was it a meet 132 00:09:48.759 --> 00:09:52.519 and greed or a meet up? Oh? The meet and Greed? Yep? 133 00:09:54.159 --> 00:09:56.879 So what did that conversation look like? What was said? You know? 134 00:09:56.919 --> 00:10:00.279 Because I don't have an aunt, you know? Well, okay, 135 00:10:00.360 --> 00:10:05.240 so my aunt and I we're more of like the best of friends, right 136 00:10:05.600 --> 00:10:09.000 and funny enough, through this whole weird journey that I've been on, our 137 00:10:09.000 --> 00:10:13.720 relationship actually diminished after that, and we only just regrouped kind of this weekend, 138 00:10:13.840 --> 00:10:16.639 and I brought up all of this so I can even share with you 139 00:10:16.720 --> 00:10:22.679 her thoughts. She So, there is this location called Cherry Grove and it 140 00:10:22.799 --> 00:10:28.120 is the LGBTQ community of Long Island. You take a ferry over there, 141 00:10:28.360 --> 00:10:31.519 you can't. There's no cars. Everything is just like super quaint, and 142 00:10:33.240 --> 00:10:37.879 it's it's primarily gay, truthfully, there's more of that, but all inclusive 143 00:10:37.960 --> 00:10:43.720 to everybody. So we would go over there often because we kind of liked 144 00:10:43.720 --> 00:10:48.759 it. You know, people were just super free and just you go to 145 00:10:48.879 --> 00:10:52.720 Cherries and they're just playing eighties music, so you're rocking out, just fucking 146 00:10:52.799 --> 00:10:56.120 having a grand old time. You know, on the water. It's it's 147 00:10:56.200 --> 00:11:01.879 just so great and the people are just so love because they're just so colorful 148 00:11:03.080 --> 00:11:07.240 and creative, and it's just a really great place to be. So when 149 00:11:07.279 --> 00:11:09.480 she said we were going over there, she was like, you know, 150 00:11:09.600 --> 00:11:13.919 my friends having a party, which wasn't an unusual statement. The part that 151 00:11:13.039 --> 00:11:16.159 threw me, though, is when I got in the car, I was 152 00:11:16.200 --> 00:11:22.480 weird. I was wearing a pencil skirt and I don't even know what it 153 00:11:22.639 --> 00:11:26.440 was like is black, just want like one shirt with like this lace thing 154 00:11:26.480 --> 00:11:28.519 over eight? And I get in the car and she was like, where 155 00:11:28.559 --> 00:11:30.759 are you going. I was like, you said, we're going to a 156 00:11:30.840 --> 00:11:33.320 party over in Jerry Grove. What do you want me to be wearing? 157 00:11:33.639 --> 00:11:37.639 Yeah, well she should have told me that. It was more like, 158 00:11:37.559 --> 00:11:41.240 not like that kind of party. I felt so out of place when I 159 00:11:41.279 --> 00:11:46.039 showed up to the ferry dock and I'm seeing all these humans around me, 160 00:11:46.360 --> 00:11:50.000 you know, wearing their summer clothes, hardly dressed and just kind of doing 161 00:11:50.039 --> 00:11:52.919 their thing. And here I am looking like, fucking I'm going, I 162 00:11:52.919 --> 00:11:54.200 don't know, to a corporate meeting. I guess, like I didn't even 163 00:11:54.279 --> 00:11:58.440 know what was happening. I ended up like going and buying different clothes when 164 00:11:58.440 --> 00:12:01.919 we don't know there, So there was there was some hiccups along the way. 165 00:12:03.240 --> 00:12:07.720 But when she started to explain to me what her relationship was with Spencer, 166 00:12:07.759 --> 00:12:11.559 because her and Spencer were really good friends. So when she started to 167 00:12:11.600 --> 00:12:16.799 explain to me, like that's why she felt comfortable, I guess being in 168 00:12:16.840 --> 00:12:20.679 the environment because she knows him really well and felt like he wouldn't bring her 169 00:12:20.840 --> 00:12:26.559 or ask her to do something that would be unacceptably uncomfortable, you know. 170 00:12:26.720 --> 00:12:31.759 And her and I have always been very mischievous together, so, like I 171 00:12:31.799 --> 00:12:37.240 mean from we used to work together and shared an office for like ten years, 172 00:12:37.679 --> 00:12:43.399 and we have done some real shady ass shit together. She's a great 173 00:12:43.480 --> 00:12:46.360 human, very funny, so I tell her all the time. I'm like, 174 00:12:46.399 --> 00:12:50.879 your intro to my story is my aunt took me to a swinger's party 175 00:12:50.879 --> 00:12:54.159 and I have no idea what the fuck was going on. I love it. 176 00:12:54.320 --> 00:12:56.159 She just wrapped and thought it was super funny, and it was like, 177 00:12:56.360 --> 00:13:01.720 that's great, it is it is. It's a good one. Yeah, 178 00:13:01.720 --> 00:13:05.080 It's a wild way to start a story for sure. Yeah, yeah, 179 00:13:05.120 --> 00:13:07.799 I have a few of those stories, there's no easy way to lead 180 00:13:07.840 --> 00:13:13.120 into them. Like I had a childhood cat that was eaten by an alligator. 181 00:13:13.759 --> 00:13:18.279 Yeah, Adams made it clear that I have to watch how I present 182 00:13:18.399 --> 00:13:24.080 that story because it just confuses people. And I don't know another way to 183 00:13:24.080 --> 00:13:28.720 describe how I lost my childhood cat. Yeah. Adam just kind of laughs, 184 00:13:28.799 --> 00:13:33.320 but he's like, you need to stop telling that story. And I'm 185 00:13:33.360 --> 00:13:37.399 like, I don't know another way to ease into the death of my childhood 186 00:13:37.440 --> 00:13:41.200 cat. She got eaten by an alligator. Yeah, it is just what 187 00:13:41.399 --> 00:13:43.360 I just got to pull the band in and just do it. Yeah, 188 00:13:43.399 --> 00:13:48.720 because you lived in like so close to a Louisiana Yeah, like a specific 189 00:13:48.919 --> 00:13:54.200 spot where you know alligators were nearby, and I feel like the most of 190 00:13:54.200 --> 00:14:00.120 the rest of the country is like I didn't even know alligators just roamed my 191 00:14:00.159 --> 00:14:05.960 goad. I'll tell I have been to Louisiana for swingers events, and let 192 00:14:05.039 --> 00:14:09.080 me tell you something. The culture has like the down south in that area 193 00:14:09.159 --> 00:14:13.279 like changed my life. It's so far different than the North. So what 194 00:14:13.279 --> 00:14:18.399 would you say is the difference in the singers community from like the East coast 195 00:14:18.600 --> 00:14:22.679 to the well before before we get quite into that I did. Want to 196 00:14:22.759 --> 00:14:26.639 go back to my question, Um, you know that people have an idea 197 00:14:26.639 --> 00:14:31.919 of what a swinger is, how would you describe what a swinger is or 198 00:14:31.000 --> 00:14:37.000 kind of what that lifestyle is like. Yeah, so the real definition of 199 00:14:37.000 --> 00:14:45.559 a swinger is you have to fully swap and have sex with another husband or 200 00:14:45.559 --> 00:14:48.480 wife. So okay, so that's kind of like the barrier of injury. 201 00:14:50.159 --> 00:14:54.480 Yeah, because like you can be see, this is a this is a 202 00:14:54.519 --> 00:14:58.159 part that's so hard about labels because I don't like labels, right because I 203 00:14:58.200 --> 00:15:01.600 consider myself a swinger, but my goes in so many different variations depending on 204 00:15:01.639 --> 00:15:05.720 who the person is. But you do have like the full on, full 205 00:15:05.799 --> 00:15:09.480 swap swinger who is doing full intercourse. But then you have like the saft 206 00:15:09.519 --> 00:15:16.120 swaps who only do maybe like oral or very simple kind of swapping. It's 207 00:15:16.159 --> 00:15:20.639 not full swaps, so they're called soft swaps, you know. And then 208 00:15:20.679 --> 00:15:26.000 you go into of course, the different I don't know characters. I don't 209 00:15:26.000 --> 00:15:28.759 even know what they're classified genres of fucking swinging. I don't know couple, 210 00:15:30.120 --> 00:15:31.480 you know, hot wife, like what, I don't know what they're called. 211 00:15:33.440 --> 00:15:37.679 There's so many sub credits. Yeah, and layers to things when it 212 00:15:37.720 --> 00:15:43.679 comes to sex and relationships. So I get it. Yep, it sounds 213 00:15:43.720 --> 00:15:48.120 like the foundation of it is swapping partners in that's exactly right, Yep, 214 00:15:48.480 --> 00:15:50.799 yep. It has to be couples, and it has to be yep, 215 00:15:50.919 --> 00:15:56.120 exactly a couple on couple. So how long have you been a swinger? 216 00:15:56.720 --> 00:16:00.480 So? Truthfully, from the second that I met Spencer, I was in 217 00:16:00.559 --> 00:16:04.240 it because he had a partner at the time, which they were working on 218 00:16:04.279 --> 00:16:11.440 some exits of their relationship. But I didn't come in as a triad, 219 00:16:11.759 --> 00:16:15.360 but I did come in as like a second girlfriend per se, so there 220 00:16:15.399 --> 00:16:22.320 were some characteristics of what a traveling trio would look like. But her and 221 00:16:22.360 --> 00:16:27.519 I did not get along like at all. So he found me another couple 222 00:16:29.159 --> 00:16:36.399 that slowly integrated me into the lifestyle that I never physically did anything sexual with 223 00:16:36.440 --> 00:16:38.600 them, but we would spend a lot of sexy nights role in our faces 224 00:16:38.600 --> 00:16:44.440 off, sorry, and you know, just kind of like caressing and just 225 00:16:44.519 --> 00:16:48.080 like kind of just being super chill. And I really appreciated that because it 226 00:16:48.159 --> 00:16:55.960 made me very comfortable and understanding of what an actual swap would look like. 227 00:16:56.279 --> 00:16:57.919 You know, at that time, it was too soon for me, but 228 00:16:59.039 --> 00:17:03.000 from an educational standpoint and understanding what I was getting myself into, it was 229 00:17:03.039 --> 00:17:08.319 the best way for me to experience it without them being really pushy or anything. 230 00:17:08.799 --> 00:17:15.160 It turns out that that same couple unfortunately ended up getting divorced, but 231 00:17:15.359 --> 00:17:22.519 he remained friends with us and became my first full on maile fuck person that 232 00:17:22.640 --> 00:17:27.519 I have, and we ended up having like all through COVID threesomes like every 233 00:17:27.559 --> 00:17:32.640 other night, you know, forever. So for me, it was a 234 00:17:32.680 --> 00:17:37.799 really great experience initially because I was so far comfortable with him from a respect 235 00:17:37.920 --> 00:17:42.319 level that when I was comfortable to fully have sex with another man, it 236 00:17:42.440 --> 00:17:45.640 was a no brainer for me to ask for it to be him because of 237 00:17:45.680 --> 00:17:49.680 the way he was so courteous and lovely initially, you know, So it 238 00:17:49.759 --> 00:17:56.839 made the dynamic like really spectacular, Wow, fun, what a time. 239 00:17:57.599 --> 00:18:02.839 Yeah, it sounds like you guys got to ease into it a little bit, 240 00:18:02.920 --> 00:18:10.079 which I'm sure was what was very kind of expence. Yeah, yeah, 241 00:18:10.160 --> 00:18:15.759 yeah, Because you know, I naturally think about people swinging and it's 242 00:18:15.599 --> 00:18:19.519 just you know, people are diving in and swapping partners. But I've always 243 00:18:19.519 --> 00:18:26.799 been curious about what easy into it and experiencing the shallow and of what swinging 244 00:18:26.920 --> 00:18:30.000 can look like. Yeah, for me, like I don't recommend that, 245 00:18:30.319 --> 00:18:34.559 and so twofold. So that was kind of one of the reasons why my 246 00:18:34.640 --> 00:18:40.640 podcast became so passionate to me when it initially started, because it was more 247 00:18:40.759 --> 00:18:45.079 about being super straightforward and saying, you all are fucking up and you shouldn't 248 00:18:45.079 --> 00:18:49.079 do it this way because you don't understand what it is that you're getting into. 249 00:18:49.759 --> 00:18:55.279 Yes, of course, the initial thought of what you think you're going 250 00:18:55.319 --> 00:18:59.960 to be getting into is not exactly what ends up transpiring. And for me, 251 00:19:00.079 --> 00:19:03.880 you know, mentioning that Spencer had that other partner, she actually ended 252 00:19:03.920 --> 00:19:08.680 up making my life a living hell and outed me to my family and really 253 00:19:08.759 --> 00:19:14.839 went to extreme levels within my business levels, I mean went to every single 254 00:19:14.839 --> 00:19:19.279 one of my partnerships and like really try to. I mean she went hard 255 00:19:19.480 --> 00:19:22.640 for years. She only stopped last year, and what that's like three and 256 00:19:22.640 --> 00:19:27.920 a half years of torture. So for me, I saw so much negativity, 257 00:19:29.400 --> 00:19:33.880 but there's so much positivity that it's like, Okay, yes, there's 258 00:19:33.960 --> 00:19:37.319 negative, negative aspects of everything that is in life, you just have to 259 00:19:37.319 --> 00:19:40.319 be aware of them. I understand what your boundaries are with them, how 260 00:19:40.400 --> 00:19:42.559 much you're willing to contribute to them, and like where you don't want to 261 00:19:42.559 --> 00:19:45.200 go with it. And so it's okay to have the good and bad as 262 00:19:45.240 --> 00:19:48.039 long as we talk about all of it and put it to the side. 263 00:19:48.400 --> 00:19:52.160 You know, a lot of people get into it thinking that they can handle 264 00:19:52.160 --> 00:19:55.759 their emotions, and so like day one, they go and do a swap 265 00:19:55.799 --> 00:19:59.000 and they're like out of their birds and they're not in a good place with 266 00:19:59.039 --> 00:20:02.119 one another. It's because, well, you didn't take a minute and observe 267 00:20:02.279 --> 00:20:07.039 your surroundings that you're in. You're not watching, You're not seeing how they're 268 00:20:07.119 --> 00:20:11.319 interacting. What do the conversations look like, what does this all look like? 269 00:20:11.440 --> 00:20:17.680 It is very silly to play Russian Roulette with your relationship when you don't 270 00:20:17.720 --> 00:20:21.359 know what it is that you're getting yourself into. And so as I became 271 00:20:21.480 --> 00:20:26.880 real strong and passionate on relaying that message because nobody seems to have that conversation. 272 00:20:29.079 --> 00:20:36.359 Yeah, well I would imagine that swingers. You know, education is 273 00:20:37.000 --> 00:20:41.440 pretty hard to come by. So the fact that you're going through it and 274 00:20:42.039 --> 00:20:48.440 kind of cataloging it and sharing your experience as you go is amazing, So 275 00:20:48.559 --> 00:20:52.680 kudos to you. Yeah, because I mean I don't think I'm in a 276 00:20:52.759 --> 00:20:59.240 place for swinging. But we have had conversations about three SOMs and those are 277 00:20:59.279 --> 00:21:08.680 already very tiptoey conversations. So yours is like a times ten why oh why 278 00:21:07.720 --> 00:21:15.160 why? Yeah? Because I'm all for it and Adams letting me conversate about 279 00:21:15.160 --> 00:21:22.000 it, that's the first step. Yeah. Yeah, well I think that, 280 00:21:22.240 --> 00:21:26.319 Um he's like, it's that about us? Yeah, I mean I 281 00:21:26.359 --> 00:21:30.920 think for me, I am not at a place and I don't know if 282 00:21:30.960 --> 00:21:37.880 I ever will be. Like the idea of her being physical with another man 283 00:21:38.039 --> 00:21:42.279 like just makes my skin. What about a woman? Well, you know 284 00:21:42.319 --> 00:21:48.599 I love women. Yeah, maybe wouldn't she gets to just cook up with 285 00:21:48.640 --> 00:21:53.400 the woman and like you watch, that's more on the table. Yeah, 286 00:21:53.559 --> 00:22:00.960 now we're getting somewhere. Well, we love a little fair pe moment because 287 00:22:00.960 --> 00:22:06.680 I know there was a point in time where it was something we didn't talk 288 00:22:06.680 --> 00:22:10.119 about it at all. So we're definitely, you know, babies just kind 289 00:22:10.119 --> 00:22:12.680 of conversating about it. But I do think we would need to and any 290 00:22:12.960 --> 00:22:22.160 couple would you have to have super strong communication to explore something like that. 291 00:22:22.240 --> 00:22:27.599 So it doesn't come between you. Yeah. I always say and stress the 292 00:22:27.640 --> 00:22:32.799 point that you need to have super open communication and it has to be as 293 00:22:32.799 --> 00:22:37.440 transparent as you can possibly get, because you know, if you first off 294 00:22:37.480 --> 00:22:41.799 and then it's not even with your partner initially, it's with your own self. 295 00:22:41.079 --> 00:22:45.079 You have to be really understanding of what it is that you want from 296 00:22:45.079 --> 00:22:48.880 the lifestyle. You know, why do you want to partake in these activities, 297 00:22:48.920 --> 00:22:52.880 what are you going to get from it? And what do these emotions 298 00:22:52.920 --> 00:22:56.680 make you feel? That if your partner asks you why, you're able to 299 00:22:56.720 --> 00:23:02.200 fully articulate what it is that you're looking for and why you're looking for it, 300 00:23:02.240 --> 00:23:06.599 and it makes a conversation so much easier because well, you know your 301 00:23:06.640 --> 00:23:08.839 own truth, you know, and if you feel your own truth and it's 302 00:23:08.839 --> 00:23:12.240 really good for you, there's got to be a way for you to talk 303 00:23:12.279 --> 00:23:17.359 about it and for you to come to a common ground. Maybe not initially, 304 00:23:17.440 --> 00:23:21.440 and maybe you will eventually have to disagree to agree to disagree on some 305 00:23:21.480 --> 00:23:26.000 stuff, but at least you have that wholehearted open conversation because you thought about 306 00:23:26.000 --> 00:23:41.359 it so deeply within before you suggested it. You know, Hey, beautiful 307 00:23:41.359 --> 00:23:44.279 bitches, have you heard of our Patreon yet. This is a really great 308 00:23:44.319 --> 00:23:48.160 exclusive place where you can get two bonus odes a month, monthly live streams, 309 00:23:48.160 --> 00:23:52.519 a private discord to chat with us, and all kinds of bonuses and 310 00:23:52.640 --> 00:23:55.519 extras. You don't want to miss it, so head over to Patreon, 311 00:23:55.720 --> 00:23:57.680 or you can click the link in a description. You can even head to 312 00:23:57.759 --> 00:24:03.240 our website at www dot cricket bunnymedia dot com and click the bottled up Bitch's 313 00:24:03.400 --> 00:24:07.200 icon. Join our Patreon, join the fun, and enjoy all the exclusive 314 00:24:07.240 --> 00:24:22.039 benefits to become a very important bitch. So how does that relay into the 315 00:24:22.079 --> 00:24:27.599 swinging parties? Yeah? How does that correlate? Because I watched a documentary 316 00:24:27.599 --> 00:24:32.960 a while back and it had a CN Sinclaire, and that was the first 317 00:24:33.000 --> 00:24:37.240 person that I was introduced to, you know, seeing someone host or own 318 00:24:37.039 --> 00:24:41.480 a party business. And on the documentary there were a few new couples, 319 00:24:41.519 --> 00:24:45.039 and you know, she was like, oh, I have three new couples, 320 00:24:45.039 --> 00:24:48.799 and I don't know, that's so scary. I don't know if that 321 00:24:48.799 --> 00:24:52.319 would make it easier or make it worse being surrounded by other new couples. 322 00:24:52.880 --> 00:24:57.000 Sure, yeah, I gotta say that sounds like dump jumping into the deep 323 00:24:57.119 --> 00:25:02.599 end for sure. Yeah, I I think it really depends on the location 324 00:25:02.839 --> 00:25:04.359 and again, what you're looking to get out of the night. If you 325 00:25:04.359 --> 00:25:07.319 put yourself in a position where you're like, you know what, I'm going 326 00:25:07.400 --> 00:25:08.680 to go to this club and I'm just going to check it out because I 327 00:25:08.720 --> 00:25:14.559 want to be super open minded to whatever it maybe that I see that I 328 00:25:14.640 --> 00:25:18.960 experience around me, you know, and not having any expectations about what you 329 00:25:18.960 --> 00:25:25.400 will see or what you're going into. I think number one is super important 330 00:25:25.480 --> 00:25:27.599 to like laying out the night. But you got to start somewhere, right, 331 00:25:27.599 --> 00:25:33.000 so eventually you are always going to be new at some sort of location. 332 00:25:33.640 --> 00:25:41.319 And each venue or group or host each has their own set of characteristics 333 00:25:41.319 --> 00:25:45.960 maybe you'll call it for what their community brings. You know. Some are 334 00:25:45.960 --> 00:25:49.960 in under you know, fifty categories. Some are only super fit humans, 335 00:25:51.000 --> 00:25:52.880 some are who the fuck knows what they are. There are so many different 336 00:25:52.880 --> 00:25:57.000 things, you know, for us with my mendor parties, once I started 337 00:25:57.039 --> 00:26:02.759 to see that there's a land of misfits out there, and I mean not 338 00:26:03.039 --> 00:26:06.720 by they don't know what they are. You know, they want to swing, 339 00:26:07.119 --> 00:26:08.400 but you know, are they ANUBI yet? Well, they don't know 340 00:26:08.480 --> 00:26:12.519 because they haven't really experienced anything yet, but they really like being in the 341 00:26:12.680 --> 00:26:15.720 environment because they like to be super sexy, or maybe they like to be 342 00:26:15.799 --> 00:26:19.119 naked. Maybe they just like to look at the females because you're a chicken. 343 00:26:19.200 --> 00:26:22.880 You really just like, when do you get the opportunity to get a 344 00:26:22.920 --> 00:26:26.160 sexual vibe or something? You know. That was one of my things that 345 00:26:26.200 --> 00:26:30.920 I really loved and appreciated about the events. When I was exploring, you 346 00:26:30.960 --> 00:26:33.599 know, being able to be bisexual, I was like, Okay, this 347 00:26:33.640 --> 00:26:37.200 gives me a safe place to read the energies of other ladies and kind of 348 00:26:37.240 --> 00:26:42.079 see what that even just feels like, because it's way different than with a 349 00:26:42.160 --> 00:26:47.400 man, you know what I mean. So, yes, it's intimidating going 350 00:26:47.599 --> 00:26:52.160 because you have no idea what you're getting yourself into. But I think if 351 00:26:52.160 --> 00:26:55.759 you keep an open mind, you'll find that it's really really lovely. And 352 00:26:55.920 --> 00:27:03.039 our events specifically are open to everybody. We allow whether you're super you know, 353 00:27:03.200 --> 00:27:07.519 veteran, you're very new, your kink, your swing, your polly, 354 00:27:07.200 --> 00:27:11.759 it don't matter you. Everybody is welcome and it is a lovely evening. 355 00:27:12.200 --> 00:27:19.119 Is so good. So what makes a successful party you know, a 356 00:27:19.279 --> 00:27:25.240 night a party where went off without a hitch to me, When you see 357 00:27:25.240 --> 00:27:30.759 the dance floor super hopping, you know that it's a good night because you 358 00:27:30.839 --> 00:27:33.720 could write because anytime you see people super dance, like dancing hardcore, you 359 00:27:33.759 --> 00:27:37.720 know that that vibe and the energy is like flowing through that facility like nobody's 360 00:27:37.759 --> 00:27:42.000 business. And so in that regard, that's when I know that it's going 361 00:27:42.200 --> 00:27:45.839 really well and there was a flow. Right people get there and they start 362 00:27:45.920 --> 00:27:48.440 to have a drink and they're kind of like getting a little bit, you 363 00:27:48.440 --> 00:27:52.160 know, into it and stuff. So you want the music to get people's 364 00:27:52.200 --> 00:27:56.079 bodies going. And then probably around eleven thirty twelve o'clock people start to go 365 00:27:56.079 --> 00:27:59.799 into the playrooms and they go and play for like an hour or so, 366 00:28:00.200 --> 00:28:06.279 and then once maybe like one one fifteen comes until two am, they're out 367 00:28:06.319 --> 00:28:08.000 the air fucking dancing their asses off again, and you're like, check, 368 00:28:08.200 --> 00:28:11.680 we did it. Yeah, no, I get it. I'm a I'm 369 00:28:11.720 --> 00:28:18.119 also a wedding planner. So that's something that the DJ and I will immediately 370 00:28:18.160 --> 00:28:21.480 sync up about is about the music and trying to figure out, you know, 371 00:28:21.960 --> 00:28:26.680 is this crowd going to be a dancing crowd because it makes the night 372 00:28:26.839 --> 00:28:30.640 go by so much faster, even for the vendors, you know, watching 373 00:28:30.680 --> 00:28:36.279 people dance, it's so much fun. Yeah, so dancing is always a 374 00:28:36.319 --> 00:28:41.200 good indicator that the night is going well. Mhmm yeah. So so kind 375 00:28:41.240 --> 00:28:48.240 of question I have and kind of where my brain goes is about the logistics 376 00:28:48.920 --> 00:28:52.759 of these parties, like like finding a venue. Uh yeah, like that 377 00:28:52.759 --> 00:28:56.200 that's another one. Yeah, kind of more where my head was AD was 378 00:28:56.240 --> 00:29:00.519 like, how do you ensure that they are sa in kind of a health 379 00:29:02.119 --> 00:29:07.480 health wise? Yeah, oh, so good questions. So we only partner 380 00:29:07.559 --> 00:29:12.000 with one establishment right now, and it is the oldest running dance club in 381 00:29:12.160 --> 00:29:18.880 Providence, and he is super on his game with everything. So I do 382 00:29:18.039 --> 00:29:26.119 know that that facility in general is top notch, you know when you go 383 00:29:26.160 --> 00:29:32.039 to the swingers clubs and stuff. Though sometimes I don't like to sit on 384 00:29:32.039 --> 00:29:34.799 the couches and sometimes I'm like, what are doing? You know, like 385 00:29:34.839 --> 00:29:40.920 I stand a lot in a lot of locations because I don't really know. 386 00:29:41.319 --> 00:29:47.279 You know, we have partnered and collaborated with a lot of different places across 387 00:29:47.319 --> 00:29:49.640 the East Coast, and I can tell you all the property managers or club 388 00:29:49.680 --> 00:29:53.519 owners are super passionate and in what it is that they're doing, and you 389 00:29:53.559 --> 00:29:57.119 know there are clubs and all that stuff, so you know, in good 390 00:29:57.160 --> 00:30:00.400 faith manner, you would have to think that they have all their ish in 391 00:30:00.559 --> 00:30:04.440 order. Um, but you know that's not my part of the business to 392 00:30:04.559 --> 00:30:14.119 explore. I don't mind bender parties brought to you by Chlorine every Yeah. 393 00:30:14.599 --> 00:30:18.039 Yeah, that's why when we travel, we travel and we bring all of 394 00:30:18.039 --> 00:30:22.839 our own stuff. So we have we bring up all our own air mattresses, 395 00:30:22.960 --> 00:30:26.000 we bring our entire dungeon, we bring our own sheets, and you 396 00:30:26.039 --> 00:30:30.400 know, we do all of our own you know, sheet washing, and 397 00:30:30.440 --> 00:30:33.240 so we come full shop stop. We can go to like a full on 398 00:30:33.319 --> 00:30:37.279 meadow and set up a huge ass party for you in any aspects, so 399 00:30:38.519 --> 00:30:44.559 we don't let it rely on anybody. At your core, you're a party 400 00:30:44.599 --> 00:30:49.519 planner. You're saying there's a chance. Yes, listen girl, yes you 401 00:30:49.599 --> 00:30:52.640 reach out. And That's where I'm going to fall into. All of this 402 00:30:52.759 --> 00:30:57.039 is just planning the party. You know. Honestly, it's really great because 403 00:30:57.599 --> 00:31:00.799 you know, I don't really go back into the playrooms like all that often. 404 00:31:02.000 --> 00:31:04.759 I don't hardly, we don't really play at our events, either simply 405 00:31:04.839 --> 00:31:08.319 because you know you're working and god forbid, you know, the d just 406 00:31:08.519 --> 00:31:11.920 the DJ stops playing for some reason, or who the fuck knows, you 407 00:31:11.960 --> 00:31:17.400 know, anything can happen, so we try and be present at all times. 408 00:31:18.039 --> 00:31:21.440 So it's like very few and far in between that we do actually get 409 00:31:21.480 --> 00:31:26.240 to have intimate moments. But yeah, for me, I don't even know 410 00:31:26.279 --> 00:31:30.039 why I was saying that I got off track. I appreciate that though. 411 00:31:30.160 --> 00:31:37.039 So how often do you get propositioned while you're there NonStop? Oh yeah, 412 00:31:37.079 --> 00:31:42.519 constantly, yep, NonStop with those eyelashes. And I'm a little bit silly 413 00:31:42.599 --> 00:31:48.119 right now too, so they're probably like even more like, oh where I 414 00:31:48.200 --> 00:31:52.079 love it. They brought up sheets and an air mattress, and that's not 415 00:31:52.240 --> 00:31:59.640 something that I considered at all. I didn't consider any additional setup, you 416 00:31:59.640 --> 00:32:02.920 know, other than just chairs in a dance floor. Like I thought about 417 00:32:02.920 --> 00:32:07.079 how people might canotle and such, but in my mind, they're just going 418 00:32:07.119 --> 00:32:10.680 to leave together to another location. Yeah, I didn't think that there would 419 00:32:10.680 --> 00:32:17.200 be any additional setup booths, and just like any other club setup where people 420 00:32:17.279 --> 00:32:22.519 connudle, there's well yeah, and there's like different levels to the event. 421 00:32:22.640 --> 00:32:27.839 So your basic meet and greet, like I initially went to that was you 422 00:32:28.000 --> 00:32:32.200 just go in a very vanilla setting and there's no sexual swap in any kind 423 00:32:32.200 --> 00:32:37.200 of manner unless you do find something private like off location or whatever. And 424 00:32:37.240 --> 00:32:42.559 then you do have the on site play, which is what we bring to 425 00:32:42.599 --> 00:32:45.559 the table, or if you were to go an actual swingers club, that 426 00:32:45.599 --> 00:32:47.960 would be like an on site. And then there are the complete hotel takeovers 427 00:32:49.039 --> 00:32:52.880 where you have like a whole weekend of shenanigans where you're just on site and 428 00:32:53.119 --> 00:32:59.680 anything goes for the entire weekend. And it's great, my goodness, how 429 00:32:59.680 --> 00:33:02.519 fun. Yeah, like a little bit, yes, a little retreat moment. 430 00:33:02.559 --> 00:33:09.039 I love a good retreat, like a little convention vention just gonna it's 431 00:33:09.039 --> 00:33:15.720 gonna be legit with lanyards and everything. And and it's true because you will 432 00:33:15.720 --> 00:33:22.599 find education classes at the at the hotel takeovers. I love that. Yeah, 433 00:33:22.640 --> 00:33:25.160 you can. It's like that's like a whole thing. Yes, And 434 00:33:25.200 --> 00:33:30.559 they do usually have like some kink side and swinger side because you have a 435 00:33:30.559 --> 00:33:34.279 lot of crossover, so you can find some like education on the BDSM and 436 00:33:34.319 --> 00:33:37.039 then you know some you know a lot of times it will be like a 437 00:33:37.079 --> 00:33:42.160 specialty thing where it's like a wax kind of thing or maybe sensual massages. 438 00:33:42.359 --> 00:33:45.279 But there's different aspects that you that happen, you know, And so it's 439 00:33:45.319 --> 00:33:49.400 really nice when you go to the hotel takeovers because it's a very different kind 440 00:33:49.400 --> 00:33:52.079 of feel. It's just so fun. That is so cool. I didn't 441 00:33:52.079 --> 00:33:57.839 know things like this existence. So how do you find a convention like a 442 00:33:58.000 --> 00:34:00.359 hotel taker? Yeah, that's that's a good question, like or even just 443 00:34:00.440 --> 00:34:04.640 in general, say, I'm listening to this episode and I'm like, oh, 444 00:34:04.680 --> 00:34:08.000 I want to like kind of see the swinger scene or maybe even put 445 00:34:08.039 --> 00:34:10.760 myself into it. I'm interested in it. How do i as, like, 446 00:34:12.119 --> 00:34:14.840 you know, look up, say, how do I find one of 447 00:34:14.840 --> 00:34:17.280 these parties? Say, living in Austin or whatever city? Is there some 448 00:34:17.360 --> 00:34:22.039 kind of like code words? Yeah? I mean if you just put that 449 00:34:22.199 --> 00:34:27.559 in Google, Google will tell you you do swingers party near me? Okay, 450 00:34:27.880 --> 00:34:30.920 easy, we'll bring it on up. Okay, So the word is 451 00:34:31.639 --> 00:34:39.360 swing mhmm. Well that's cool because I've seen other places use different words. 452 00:34:40.400 --> 00:34:45.320 So that's neat. You know that there isn't a specific terminology or different terminology 453 00:34:45.440 --> 00:34:50.880 to find the fine parties. Yeah, yeah, a lot of people use 454 00:34:50.920 --> 00:34:53.800 like upside down Pineapple now, so you can, you know, google upside 455 00:34:53.800 --> 00:34:58.960 down Pineapple and I'm sure you'll find a ton of stuff too. Yeah. 456 00:34:59.000 --> 00:35:01.880 Well, I love looking at your parties and other people's parties, and I 457 00:35:01.920 --> 00:35:07.159 am obsessed with how there is always a theme. It's just so fun. 458 00:35:07.639 --> 00:35:14.239 Swingers love to dress up. Well, I love over a theme. I 459 00:35:14.239 --> 00:35:17.719 feel like it's such a good icebreaker. Yeah. So you know, if 460 00:35:17.719 --> 00:35:21.719 you're not dressed up, it can make things a little awkward. But I 461 00:35:21.599 --> 00:35:24.079 imagine it that everyone's dressed up in a fun outfit. You know, they're 462 00:35:24.119 --> 00:35:28.159 on different sides of the room, you know, trying to figure out how 463 00:35:28.239 --> 00:35:30.199 they're going to meet in the middle. But if you throw a costume into 464 00:35:30.199 --> 00:35:35.719 the mix, it's so much easier. Yeah. And if you want to 465 00:35:35.719 --> 00:35:39.800 go back to your initial question on what swingers alike across the country, so 466 00:35:39.920 --> 00:35:46.000 down South, I find that they really love their outfits, Like they fucking 467 00:35:46.000 --> 00:35:51.920 handmake these things, and like for weeks are making these outfits. You know, 468 00:35:52.000 --> 00:35:53.719 up north, we're like Amazon, what can we get? You know, 469 00:35:53.880 --> 00:35:59.760 and like nothing, you don't see outfits up here like you do down 470 00:36:00.039 --> 00:36:04.480 out. I'll say that for sure, And because we're so deprived, it 471 00:36:04.599 --> 00:36:07.639 is yeah, you know, like sometimes I think to myself, you know, 472 00:36:07.679 --> 00:36:10.480 I really want one of these extravagant costumes that they have, but I'm 473 00:36:10.480 --> 00:36:15.239 like, I do not have the time to sit there in glue on every 474 00:36:15.280 --> 00:36:20.559 fucking gem to my bra or like whatever. If I'm like so impressed that 475 00:36:20.639 --> 00:36:23.920 they come up with these remarkable things, and then I'm envious. I'm like, 476 00:36:24.000 --> 00:36:28.000 will you go, girls, And truthfully, a lot of the men 477 00:36:28.039 --> 00:36:32.079 are making the outfits for the ladies. Yeah. Yeah, that's a conversation 478 00:36:32.199 --> 00:36:37.199 we have often to add Adam to learn how to he knows how to sew. 479 00:36:37.199 --> 00:36:42.800 I want him to make me things well. Because in August, we 480 00:36:42.880 --> 00:36:49.079 went to Boston to go to the Lady Gaga concert. At the time when 481 00:36:49.079 --> 00:36:52.519 she announced this tour, she wasn't coming to Texas, so that was a 482 00:36:52.519 --> 00:36:54.840 little disappointing. So we you know, we went to Boston, you know, 483 00:36:54.920 --> 00:36:59.599 about a month before the show. Though she did add some Texas states. 484 00:36:59.679 --> 00:37:01.119 That was a little disappointing, you know that we could have just seen 485 00:37:01.119 --> 00:37:06.000 her here, but nonetheless, we had fun. So we go to the 486 00:37:06.039 --> 00:37:07.800 tour. I've been to every single Lady Gaga tour, and the best part 487 00:37:07.840 --> 00:37:14.519 of it is the fashion. So I bring this fool on honey Burdett purple, 488 00:37:14.719 --> 00:37:16.719 you know, bondage outfit. I'm feeling good. I'm double cheeked up. 489 00:37:16.719 --> 00:37:21.679 On a Tuesday. We're on the train, I'm the only one dressed 490 00:37:21.800 --> 00:37:23.840 up, and I'm like, okay, well, I'm sure as soon as 491 00:37:23.840 --> 00:37:29.000 we get closer to Fenway Park that's when we'll start seeing more people. And 492 00:37:29.480 --> 00:37:34.400 sure enough, we got there and no one was dressed up. I'm definitely 493 00:37:34.440 --> 00:37:39.239 the only one out, you know, in this full ass outfit, looking 494 00:37:40.000 --> 00:37:45.559 looking like a snack. But I did get the attention of this Asian couple 495 00:37:45.559 --> 00:37:49.039 and they didn't speak a lot of English, but they did ask me for 496 00:37:49.079 --> 00:37:52.639 a picture, so I made their trip. They to them, Yeah, 497 00:37:52.800 --> 00:37:57.280 no one d That's the moment when you own it and you're like, I'm 498 00:37:57.280 --> 00:38:00.440 the most badass motherfucker here. Yeah. I was just strutting around. I 499 00:38:00.480 --> 00:38:05.159 mean, I didn't have a choice, but it was interesting. I was. 500 00:38:05.440 --> 00:38:08.480 I was like, wow, because Massachusetts was very progressive. I saw, 501 00:38:09.039 --> 00:38:14.079 you know, pride flags hung up in front of churches, and you 502 00:38:14.079 --> 00:38:17.800 know, in Texas, we would never you know, we hate people and 503 00:38:17.880 --> 00:38:22.920 women and gay people. You guys have one of the biggest um like events 504 00:38:22.960 --> 00:38:30.639 down there. Purgatory happens in Texas. What's purgatory? What's that? Yeah? 505 00:38:30.679 --> 00:38:35.039 You wish to look it up. It is like I have, like 506 00:38:35.599 --> 00:38:37.800 I've heard of a lot of events, but that one seems to be like 507 00:38:37.960 --> 00:38:42.719 the most intense, the most intense. And it's a couple I think it's 508 00:38:42.719 --> 00:38:45.519 like a weekend or maybe it's a couple of days long. But oh yeah, 509 00:38:45.559 --> 00:38:50.440 that's in Texas. You know where in Texas? I don't, but 510 00:38:50.480 --> 00:38:52.679 I do know that you have a lot of a lot of social swingers down 511 00:38:52.679 --> 00:38:59.039 in Texas. It's like a really oh yeah, yeah, Adams looking it 512 00:38:59.199 --> 00:39:02.519 up right now, so invested. So is it multiple days? Is it 513 00:39:02.639 --> 00:39:08.920 a convention? What is purgatory? Yeah? I mean I wouldn't really reference 514 00:39:08.960 --> 00:39:14.079 them as conventions. I just look at them as like huge parties, you 515 00:39:14.119 --> 00:39:16.880 know, because the people literally are party in the entire weekend long. And 516 00:39:17.119 --> 00:39:22.519 uh yeah, that's pretty much it. It doesn't find some of the stuff 517 00:39:22.559 --> 00:39:24.800 that's on the itinerary, I'm sure, but yeah, yeah, it doesn't 518 00:39:24.800 --> 00:39:28.960 surprise me. Well, because we're so deprived, we're so deprived. So 519 00:39:29.079 --> 00:39:31.000 when we have the opportunity to get dressed up, you know, go all 520 00:39:31.039 --> 00:39:36.840 out. Our titties will be out. It's happening. Well, specifically, 521 00:39:36.880 --> 00:39:42.440 we have Texas Renaissance Festival down here and it is all TNA like. I've 522 00:39:42.440 --> 00:39:45.960 never seen more titties and ass in my entire life. I don't know if 523 00:39:45.960 --> 00:39:49.920 it's because Massachusetts is so progressive so they have access to their rights all the 524 00:39:49.960 --> 00:39:52.280 time, or if it's because it's cold there, but we don't. We're 525 00:39:52.280 --> 00:39:55.840 not used to that. Did you find it? Oh, each down, 526 00:39:55.960 --> 00:40:02.159 hold it down. That's where I'm from. Yeah, what are the dates? 527 00:40:04.400 --> 00:40:08.000 It's usually a lot of This is last year. Yeah, July thirteenth 528 00:40:08.000 --> 00:40:13.760 through the seventeen. Oh my goodness, it's so much fun. Thank you 529 00:40:13.840 --> 00:40:16.639 for telling us because we would have never found that. Oh yeah, yeah, 530 00:40:16.679 --> 00:40:20.440 you guys have a lot of stuff in your area. What a time. 531 00:40:20.880 --> 00:40:22.599 Well, that makes sense. I've heard of a few different things and 532 00:40:22.920 --> 00:40:27.960 they're all in Houston. Yeah, yeah, that makes sense to me. 533 00:40:28.039 --> 00:40:30.639 I feel like Houston. Having lived in both Houston and Austin, I feel 534 00:40:30.679 --> 00:40:34.800 like Houston's a little more progressive, at least as far as that kind of 535 00:40:34.800 --> 00:40:38.039 stuff. Goes Yeah, yeah, absolutely, yeah. So are you from 536 00:40:38.079 --> 00:40:42.440 the East Coast? Born and raised, born and raised New York. My 537 00:40:42.480 --> 00:40:47.639 whole life Long Island so fun. We're making our way and since I've met 538 00:40:47.679 --> 00:40:51.880 Spencer, I've toured, like, we've traveled a lot of different places in 539 00:40:51.920 --> 00:40:55.360 the East Coast, which has been great. Well being on the East Coast. 540 00:40:55.480 --> 00:41:05.400 What is your favorite city or experience. It's definitely Providence. Well okay, 541 00:41:05.440 --> 00:41:10.400 so yeah, Rhode Island is where we host. Rhode Island is like 542 00:41:10.480 --> 00:41:15.760 the melting pot of like all the surrounding states, because when we go to 543 00:41:15.840 --> 00:41:19.719 Rhode Island, we pull from like New Hampshire, like all the way up 544 00:41:19.760 --> 00:41:23.679 as far as New Hampshire to like Pa and kind of funnel in from all 545 00:41:23.800 --> 00:41:30.920 different avenues, and the people there are just so much better than New York. 546 00:41:30.000 --> 00:41:34.320 I'm sorry. New York is just nobody wants to be in New York 547 00:41:34.360 --> 00:41:37.920 for anything, Like I love New York, but you can't. You can't 548 00:41:37.920 --> 00:41:42.280 swing here in New York. Sure somebody can, but I just you know, 549 00:41:42.320 --> 00:41:45.440 the people aren't for me. They're just so much kinder and more inviting 550 00:41:45.519 --> 00:41:52.880 and accepting in that area, and it's great. Best experience though, or 551 00:41:53.039 --> 00:41:59.360 most memorable would be the first time we went to Louisiana. We went to 552 00:42:00.079 --> 00:42:02.159 risque lifestyle parties, so they're just like a hop, skip and jump away 553 00:42:02.199 --> 00:42:07.119 from you. That changed our lives. I think it was we had just 554 00:42:07.280 --> 00:42:12.119 gone down there after one of the hurricanes had just massively hit the area, 555 00:42:12.199 --> 00:42:16.000 and there was some like mixed emotions from the community goers and you know, 556 00:42:16.079 --> 00:42:21.559 some that were coming to the hotel takeover because you know, they were scheduled 557 00:42:21.599 --> 00:42:23.039 too, but then they kind of had to because that was like where they 558 00:42:23.039 --> 00:42:27.760 were going to get their fresh water and shower and different things, and so 559 00:42:29.000 --> 00:42:32.320 there was a mixture of things going on, and I think just the culture 560 00:42:32.320 --> 00:42:38.960 in general and individuals and the stories and the way they spoke of just the 561 00:42:39.039 --> 00:42:44.920 area and each other. It was it was way different than anything that we've 562 00:42:44.920 --> 00:42:50.480 ever experienced, and that will always be probably one of the top moments down 563 00:42:50.519 --> 00:42:55.159 there. Yeah. Yeah, Louisiana is specifically New Orleans there. They're so 564 00:42:55.360 --> 00:43:00.480 they're very friendly and very welcoming, and I think just very non judge mental 565 00:43:00.519 --> 00:43:04.119 and very just like you do you and and be who you are. Like 566 00:43:04.199 --> 00:43:07.400 they're they're very friendly and nice there. From what I hear they like the 567 00:43:07.679 --> 00:43:12.880 people on the river like to give. I was about to say the same 568 00:43:12.960 --> 00:43:20.639 joke, but like actually say the work. Uh well, I did have 569 00:43:20.679 --> 00:43:23.679 one one more question, Um, could you tell us about your blog and 570 00:43:24.039 --> 00:43:29.000 what that's all? Oh? Yeah, I love your blog. Oh so 571 00:43:29.039 --> 00:43:31.880 the blog. The blog consists of so many different things. I really try 572 00:43:31.920 --> 00:43:37.519 and keep the day in the life going as much as possible because I find 573 00:43:37.559 --> 00:43:39.159 that people find it, you know, to be fun. So I try 574 00:43:39.159 --> 00:43:45.719 and recap our events with as much kindest things with as possible because you know, 575 00:43:45.760 --> 00:43:49.079 like nobody really understands what goes into the setup and stuff. So there's 576 00:43:49.119 --> 00:43:52.119 a lot of fun captures. Um, So we do that. And then 577 00:43:52.119 --> 00:43:58.320 there's my Mornings with Mizzy show that is all lifestyle based and there a lot 578 00:43:58.360 --> 00:44:04.079 of it is based on communities questions, whether it's they need to hear my 579 00:44:04.880 --> 00:44:07.840 response because they know it's going to be honest, or they just need a 580 00:44:07.880 --> 00:44:13.039 confidential person to speak their words for them, and it's really kind of cool. 581 00:44:13.199 --> 00:44:15.639 So that happens right now. I'm on a lot of interviews and stuff, 582 00:44:15.679 --> 00:44:20.639 so that's kind of what's up there now. And then I post step 583 00:44:20.760 --> 00:44:23.079 On in regards to Mizzy's boutique, like some of the new items that I'm 584 00:44:23.079 --> 00:44:27.320 working on or you know, sales, different things like that. So I 585 00:44:27.880 --> 00:44:30.400 try and encompass all of everything that we're doing to kind of just like keep 586 00:44:30.440 --> 00:44:35.800 it all flowing. Well, just the fact that you've done this and for 587 00:44:36.679 --> 00:44:42.119 short years is very fun and very motivational. God dang, girl, you 588 00:44:42.159 --> 00:44:45.360 really done did that. I also love that you're kind of sharing this with 589 00:44:45.400 --> 00:44:50.440 the world and like presenting it out there for people. I always find that 590 00:44:51.440 --> 00:44:57.440 these groups that are maybe you know, quote unquote not normal or whatever the 591 00:44:57.559 --> 00:44:59.679 term you want to use, you know, the outliers, you know, 592 00:45:00.119 --> 00:45:05.039 slightly off kiltered from what society says is the normal way to do things right, 593 00:45:05.840 --> 00:45:09.639 I always find those are the most welcoming and just kind of uplifting groups. 594 00:45:09.639 --> 00:45:14.880 They're always like so so happy to have you join or whatever. So 595 00:45:15.280 --> 00:45:20.679 it's great that you're you're presenting this out to people so that if they are 596 00:45:20.760 --> 00:45:23.280 interested, they can kind of get a better understanding and know that if they 597 00:45:23.360 --> 00:45:28.679 do want to explore this, then they'll just be extremely welcomed into these into 598 00:45:28.719 --> 00:45:31.960 these groups. Yeah, yeah, it's true. Thank you for saying that. 599 00:45:32.039 --> 00:45:36.840 And you know, I mean, I just don't want anybody to ever 600 00:45:37.039 --> 00:45:40.199 feel bad, right, I mean, you've felt bad, I'm sure one 601 00:45:40.280 --> 00:45:44.199 day in your life, and you know what that feels like. Nobody should 602 00:45:44.519 --> 00:45:46.360 feel that way, you know, And that was always like my mission to 603 00:45:46.400 --> 00:45:52.400 give somebody a place where they can just feel free for a second and not 604 00:45:52.639 --> 00:45:55.559 feel that way, because the world is very judgmental, you know, going 605 00:45:55.599 --> 00:46:00.920 back to initially when you were like, what is the classic tion of swinger? 606 00:46:00.320 --> 00:46:05.079 You know, people automatically hear that word and they're already in like a 607 00:46:05.199 --> 00:46:08.440 grotesque, you know, kind of mindset on like what's going on? They 608 00:46:08.440 --> 00:46:15.159 think automatically these huge orgies and just like you know, I don't gross unprotected 609 00:46:15.159 --> 00:46:19.480 sex or something like, I'm not sure what the interpretation is, but I 610 00:46:19.559 --> 00:46:22.119 know that it's super negative. And that's it. When you go and you 611 00:46:22.159 --> 00:46:29.960 meet the individuals, they are just people who have desires inside themselves that are 612 00:46:30.000 --> 00:46:35.280 not afraid to actually speak them because we all live every day with little things 613 00:46:35.280 --> 00:46:37.800 inside of us that we wish we can say out loud. But for some 614 00:46:37.840 --> 00:46:43.039 odd reason, you're fearful of whatever that judgment is going to be brought upon 615 00:46:43.159 --> 00:46:46.320 you, and nobody should live that you should be able to live your most 616 00:46:46.480 --> 00:46:52.719 free, open, honest self because we all have those things, and so 617 00:46:52.440 --> 00:46:57.440 yeah, you should come over to our side. Yeah, well, I 618 00:46:57.519 --> 00:47:00.840 really appreciate and let that you're just providing all us education and resources, because 619 00:47:01.079 --> 00:47:07.760 even anything that I present to Adam or even act like I have information about 620 00:47:07.840 --> 00:47:13.760 quote unquote, it's it's not from a trusted source. You. It's the 621 00:47:13.760 --> 00:47:17.760 most I've learned about swinging is probably what I've seen in movies, and everything 622 00:47:17.800 --> 00:47:23.440 that they show is so aggressive. It's like a couple walking into a party 623 00:47:23.480 --> 00:47:28.599 and they didn't know it was a swingers party and and they're being really aggressive, 624 00:47:28.800 --> 00:47:30.119 being like, let me come have sex with us. You know, 625 00:47:30.159 --> 00:47:36.960 it's just like really intense. It never comes off as friendly as it really 626 00:47:37.199 --> 00:47:40.519 is. It's just very it's almost like a joke of like walking into a 627 00:47:40.559 --> 00:47:46.039 singer's party. So I love hearing that there are conversations and there's a lot 628 00:47:46.079 --> 00:47:54.000 of communication and safety, and that it's just a full on environment of like 629 00:47:54.159 --> 00:48:00.400 minded people versus you know, just like a slap in the face experience. 630 00:48:01.679 --> 00:48:06.320 Thank you. I'm really appreciative that you had me on your show so we 631 00:48:06.360 --> 00:48:09.679 can share it with more humans. Out there who are just curious or you 632 00:48:09.719 --> 00:48:14.599 know, who had no idea but maybe now are curious, so we'll see 633 00:48:15.760 --> 00:48:20.159 it's something to explore. I mean, that's kind of our overall theme of 634 00:48:20.199 --> 00:48:23.800 the show is, you know, just having conversations, even if you know 635 00:48:24.000 --> 00:48:29.519 you might not become a swinger overnight, but being able to just discuss something 636 00:48:29.599 --> 00:48:32.480 and discuss something new is step one. And like I said, that's our 637 00:48:32.679 --> 00:48:37.880 entire mission, is just communicating what you want to try and explore with your 638 00:48:37.960 --> 00:48:43.199 partners. So you know, you may not actually do a swingers party, 639 00:48:43.239 --> 00:48:46.719 but at least have those conversations of what you're wanting in the bedroom. You 640 00:48:46.760 --> 00:48:53.039 know that writes without embarrassments, to talk about your needs in the bedroom without 641 00:48:53.039 --> 00:48:59.519 feeling embarrassed, especially females, where it's okay for you to explore your sexuality 642 00:48:59.639 --> 00:49:02.599 and be as open and free as you want and nobody's going to judge you 643 00:49:02.639 --> 00:49:07.440 for it. Well, because even Adam is learning a lot, you know, 644 00:49:07.480 --> 00:49:13.519 the last few months or this season, we got some fun new toys 645 00:49:13.760 --> 00:49:16.840 from fun Factory, so shout out to them, because when it comes to 646 00:49:16.960 --> 00:49:22.639 male toys, I only think about a fleshlight and then an ass like a 647 00:49:22.760 --> 00:49:28.599 literal, literal ass a real dollar or something. Yeah, so learning about 648 00:49:28.719 --> 00:49:30.679 male toys has been really fun. You know, they sent us a few 649 00:49:30.719 --> 00:49:37.400 and one of them it was like, uh, what was it. It 650 00:49:37.480 --> 00:49:40.480 was like it's called the Manta. Yeah. It was like this little hook, 651 00:49:40.559 --> 00:49:44.480 kind of rubbery hook thing that goes around the penis. Yeah, it's 652 00:49:44.480 --> 00:49:45.719 almost like a I don't want to call it a rubber hand, but it 653 00:49:45.800 --> 00:49:51.280 is like a silicone situation that you put your penis in and it vibrates, 654 00:49:51.320 --> 00:49:53.840 and it was really fun. It's really cool, and uh, you know, 655 00:49:53.920 --> 00:49:59.440 male sexuality isn't something that is talked about very often, so I'm just 656 00:49:59.480 --> 00:50:05.880 excited that he's exploring all. It's okay man, if you're bisexual too, 657 00:50:06.119 --> 00:50:09.320 just putting that out there. It's okay to have your little butt hole touched. 658 00:50:09.400 --> 00:50:13.840 It's okay. Yeah, I know. I mean, you know, 659 00:50:13.960 --> 00:50:20.840 like I don't really insert anything into anybody because of my nails. But every 660 00:50:20.840 --> 00:50:23.400 once in a while, you know, Spencer gets like this little like let's 661 00:50:23.480 --> 00:50:25.639 you know, try this, or let's you know, let's try that and 662 00:50:25.679 --> 00:50:29.960 figure it out. And it makes me happy, right because if you're comfortable 663 00:50:30.000 --> 00:50:34.480 with the people that you're with, that you're open to trying anything out is 664 00:50:34.559 --> 00:50:37.840 great. You know when men often feel intimidated by women wanting toys in the 665 00:50:37.920 --> 00:50:40.199 bedroom, Well, I'm sorry. There's a lot of stuff that you can 666 00:50:40.280 --> 00:50:45.239 do with toys, and shame on you for feeling embarrassed or you know, 667 00:50:45.400 --> 00:50:47.960 not good enough or whatever that emotion is that you carry with it, because 668 00:50:49.000 --> 00:50:54.559 toys are great. They're great. I always say that toys are our friends, 669 00:50:54.679 --> 00:51:00.280 not yes, I love them. Well, did you have anything else, 670 00:51:00.320 --> 00:51:04.440 Adam, No, I think I'm good. Well, thank you again 671 00:51:04.599 --> 00:51:07.480 for coming on the show. I was so excited when you responded to my 672 00:51:07.360 --> 00:51:10.000 Instagram. I was like, this is so excited to talk to Missy. 673 00:51:10.159 --> 00:51:13.280 Yeah, this will be great, and you know, we can continue to 674 00:51:13.280 --> 00:51:16.199 cross collaborate and see if we can get some crossover in our community since we're 675 00:51:16.280 --> 00:51:20.880 kind of on different sort of different coast, different different time zones for sure, 676 00:51:21.000 --> 00:51:27.079 So let's start the grinds on helping each other out. Yeah, so 677 00:51:27.119 --> 00:51:31.400 where do you want people to find you? Missybender? Dot com would be 678 00:51:31.840 --> 00:51:37.199 the best place, and then every place on social media is just Missybender, 679 00:51:37.280 --> 00:51:40.480 so you can't miss me. This was great. Thank you so so much 680 00:51:40.559 --> 00:51:45.159 for having me, this was really enjoyable, perfect, and you can find 681 00:51:45.199 --> 00:51:49.599 all of this in the description of the episode. But thank you again for 682 00:51:50.000 --> 00:51:55.320 coming on and talking and teaching us all about parties and swinger lifestyle, and 683 00:51:57.000 --> 00:52:01.920 to all of our awesome listeners, Stay horny. If you enjoy today's episode 684 00:52:01.920 --> 00:52:06.400 of Balled Up Bitches, be sure to rate and subscribe wherever you listen to 685 00:52:06.440 --> 00:52:09.360 your podcast to join in on more of our conversations and fun. You can 686 00:52:09.400 --> 00:52:15.400 follow us on social media at bottled up Bitches on Instagram and bottled up Talk 687 00:52:15.519 --> 00:52:19.079 on Twitter, and write in your sex capes anything you want to share with 688 00:52:19.119 --> 00:52:22.280 the team at bottled up Talk at gmail dot com. Cover art for bottled 689 00:52:22.360 --> 00:52:28.400 Up Bitches is created by Winston Gambro. Episodes are produced and edited by Rihanna 690 00:52:28.400 --> 00:52:32.440 Campbell and Adam Lewis. This has been a Cricket Bunny production. Stay Horny, Bitches,