WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.080 --> 00:00:03.040 Hi, everyone, Welcome back to another podcast episode. My name is Alisha 2 00:00:03.080 --> 00:00:06.360 Cogan, the host of the Globe Secrets podcast, where I help you expand 3 00:00:06.400 --> 00:00:09.199 your minds and become more self aware so that you can glow up. It's 4 00:00:09.279 --> 00:00:14.199 the best version of yourself. Hello, how are we doing? If you're 5 00:00:14.199 --> 00:00:18.600 watching on YouTube, it's a new background and the background is giving what it 6 00:00:18.640 --> 00:00:23.280 needs to give. Okay, we are here. I know whoever's listening audio 7 00:00:23.359 --> 00:00:28.039 you can't see. Maybe this is your time to go watch the Globe Secrets 8 00:00:28.079 --> 00:00:31.120 podcast handle on YouTube just for a moment, just so you can see what 9 00:00:31.160 --> 00:00:34.719 the vibe is. We've got a new chair, We've got artwork, We've 10 00:00:34.719 --> 00:00:38.600 got the YouTube plaque up here. We got a little chess going over here. 11 00:00:38.960 --> 00:00:42.560 I am so happy with this space now. Listen, things are going 12 00:00:42.600 --> 00:00:45.640 to change, probably, but let's quickly do a rundown, but we will 13 00:00:45.640 --> 00:00:47.880 get into the episode because I'm not going to make this super super long. 14 00:00:47.920 --> 00:00:53.119 So I'm sitting on this beautiful blue Togo dupe chair. I will have this 15 00:00:53.439 --> 00:00:56.640 linked on my LTK because I found it on Wayfair, but I did get 16 00:00:56.640 --> 00:00:59.679 it on Ali Baba because I couldn't find the baby blue that I wanted to, 17 00:00:59.719 --> 00:01:03.039 but I found on Wayfair. Totally fine, I'll have it linked if 18 00:01:03.039 --> 00:01:06.719 you want. It is so comfy. It is actually called a bean bag 19 00:01:06.799 --> 00:01:08.439 chair, but it's not a bean bag, Like it is definitely harder than 20 00:01:08.439 --> 00:01:11.920 a bean bag, but is so comfortable. I can like chill, I 21 00:01:11.920 --> 00:01:15.799 have a pillow behind me. Oh my gosh, Like recording now is gonna 22 00:01:15.840 --> 00:01:19.680 just be so fun and fresh for me. And then I have this Okay, 23 00:01:19.719 --> 00:01:23.159 so it's like one half is well, it's a butterfly behind me, 24 00:01:23.799 --> 00:01:27.400 but one half is like there's half of the butterfly's blue, and then one 25 00:01:27.400 --> 00:01:32.920 half the butterfly is like a lighter blue with a white background, and then 26 00:01:32.959 --> 00:01:36.959 a darker blue with a darker blue black background. That was really hard to 27 00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:42.400 explain. I was gonna put these too, because they came separate in like 28 00:01:42.480 --> 00:01:45.439 picture frames, but then they didn't fit in the fit picture frame, so 29 00:01:45.480 --> 00:01:48.079 I was like, you know what, Honestly, I'm just gonna use tape 30 00:01:48.079 --> 00:01:49.920 and put them up so you know it works. We got the YouTube plaque 31 00:01:49.920 --> 00:01:53.079 from the main channel. This is so funny because obviously I don't have one 32 00:01:53.159 --> 00:01:57.920 hundred k on the podcast channel, just my main channel. Well over that 33 00:01:57.040 --> 00:02:01.760 now. But when I got this plaque, my YouTube name for my main 34 00:02:01.840 --> 00:02:05.879 channel was the Glow Up Secrets, and I didn't have a podcast channel because 35 00:02:05.879 --> 00:02:10.360 I only did audio. So this plaque says congratulations the Glow Up Secrets for 36 00:02:10.439 --> 00:02:14.000 hitting one hundred k, and I was like, damn, Like I kind 37 00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:15.560 of wanted to say my name. So when I hit one hundred k on 38 00:02:15.599 --> 00:02:19.879 the podcast channel and I get another plaque, I'm just going to have it 39 00:02:19.919 --> 00:02:23.439 say Alicia Gogan and then that way I have one for the pod and one 40 00:02:23.479 --> 00:02:25.120 for one for my name, and then when I hit a million, we'll 41 00:02:25.120 --> 00:02:28.479 just do the same thing. So love that for us. I also have 42 00:02:28.560 --> 00:02:34.000 my little acrylic podcast art which everyone who listens to the audio will see my 43 00:02:34.159 --> 00:02:38.360 podcast art. And this is this was actually from Tests. Shout out to 44 00:02:38.400 --> 00:02:45.840 Tests. She is doing well right now, but not the best situation happened 45 00:02:45.840 --> 00:02:49.879 to her over the weekend. But we're sending lots of love and prayers to 46 00:02:49.919 --> 00:02:53.400 her. She is going to be just fine. I love you Tests, 47 00:02:53.639 --> 00:02:55.960 and then I just I honestly, I picked up this candle because it matched 48 00:02:57.000 --> 00:03:00.479 my podcast art pink, so we have blue, we have a little bit 49 00:03:00.479 --> 00:03:02.039 of pink We're gonna add some more, but I'm so happy to be here 50 00:03:02.199 --> 00:03:07.919 recording. My office is so clean now from all of the shit that was 51 00:03:07.960 --> 00:03:10.759 everywhere in this place, and I just feel like at home now. I 52 00:03:10.800 --> 00:03:15.199 haven't recorded in this room. If you guys don't know, I live in 53 00:03:15.319 --> 00:03:20.599 a one bedroom plus den in Toronto, and my den is actually, honestly, 54 00:03:20.599 --> 00:03:23.280 it's like a room. It has a window, it's beautiful, it's 55 00:03:23.319 --> 00:03:25.360 big enough for honestly, you could have this as a room. And so 56 00:03:25.479 --> 00:03:29.680 I wanted this to be in my office for the longest time, but I 57 00:03:29.719 --> 00:03:31.719 really wanted to put some thought into it, and so I've been recording all 58 00:03:31.759 --> 00:03:35.719 of my episodes out in the kitchen area. We're not the kitchen area, 59 00:03:35.719 --> 00:03:38.240 but the living room slash kitchen area. It was working, but now we're 60 00:03:38.240 --> 00:03:40.400 here. I'm so happy to be here. I hope you guys like everything. 61 00:03:40.719 --> 00:03:45.280 Just better visuals for the pod. Things will probably move, but I 62 00:03:45.360 --> 00:03:47.319 am so comfortable. That is the only thing that I wanted was to be 63 00:03:47.400 --> 00:03:51.520 just more comfortable when I was recording. So anyways, we need to get 64 00:03:51.560 --> 00:03:54.520 into it, and what we need to get into is when are you going 65 00:03:54.560 --> 00:04:00.759 to stop hating on yourself? When are you going to decide that you are 66 00:04:00.800 --> 00:04:03.039 good enough? When are you going to decide that you are hot enough? 67 00:04:03.400 --> 00:04:06.759 Like this is the reason why I kind of came up with this, Well, 68 00:04:06.800 --> 00:04:10.759 there's many reasons why I came up with this specific topic because I just 69 00:04:10.759 --> 00:04:15.240 feel like, collectively everyone needs to always hear this. But I think maybe, 70 00:04:15.279 --> 00:04:18.439 like I think this is probably when I came back from Nashville. I 71 00:04:18.439 --> 00:04:24.000 had the best time in Nashville. I just I was just feeling myself for 72 00:04:24.439 --> 00:04:27.399 the most part. Honestly, I have pretty good confidence with myself, and 73 00:04:27.519 --> 00:04:29.800 it wasn't always like this. I didn't always think that I was pretty. 74 00:04:29.800 --> 00:04:31.319 I didn't always think that I had an amazing body. I didn't always think 75 00:04:31.360 --> 00:04:36.639 that I was successful, Like definitely not. And obviously, like I've built 76 00:04:36.680 --> 00:04:40.759 myself up to a point where, yes, it's very clear that it makes 77 00:04:40.759 --> 00:04:43.480 sense why I would be confident in certain areas of my life because I've had 78 00:04:43.519 --> 00:04:46.920 success in that sense in a way. But still, there was always always 79 00:04:46.959 --> 00:04:50.680 always a level of me deciding that I was worthy and enough and hot enough 80 00:04:50.680 --> 00:04:57.439 and pretty enough before let's say I was fully embodied in that or I really 81 00:04:57.480 --> 00:05:00.959 knew that I just had to at some point in my life just stop picking 82 00:05:01.000 --> 00:05:04.639 on everything about myself and just decide that I'm good enough. But like I 83 00:05:04.680 --> 00:05:09.199 was saying, i came out from Nashville, I was just feeling so just 84 00:05:09.360 --> 00:05:12.920 happy with myself and how far I've come and just you know, really feeling 85 00:05:12.920 --> 00:05:15.120 myself. And I remember for one of the off topic episodes. What I 86 00:05:15.120 --> 00:05:17.720 do for the off topic episodes, by the way, is I usually have 87 00:05:17.800 --> 00:05:21.040 a lot of thoughts or just different things that come to me throughout the week, 88 00:05:21.120 --> 00:05:24.959 or things that have happened, things that I just you know, there's 89 00:05:25.000 --> 00:05:28.800 some wisdom in something. I'll write it in my notes app and then when 90 00:05:28.800 --> 00:05:30.720 I'm ready to record, I will, you know, pick and choose some 91 00:05:30.759 --> 00:05:34.120 of the things that I want to talk about. And one of the main 92 00:05:34.759 --> 00:05:40.800 thoughts that I had when I came back from Nashville is like, when are 93 00:05:40.839 --> 00:05:46.199 we going to collectively decide that we are hot? When are we going to 94 00:05:46.319 --> 00:05:50.199 decide that we are good enough? Like? Are we not sick and tired? 95 00:05:50.279 --> 00:05:54.319 Because I know that I was, But are you? I should just 96 00:05:54.319 --> 00:05:57.519 say it because I'm gonna talk to you now. Are you not sick and 97 00:05:57.560 --> 00:06:00.680 tired of waking up every single fucking day and looking at yourself and picking out 98 00:06:00.720 --> 00:06:04.959 every flaw that you have, constantly complaining about all the things that you have 99 00:06:05.000 --> 00:06:11.040 not accomplished, constantly going over and over and over all of the mistakes and 100 00:06:11.120 --> 00:06:14.600 quotations mistakes that you have made, or the things that you haven't done, 101 00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:18.879 or constantly comparing yourself to other people. When are you going to stop? 102 00:06:19.199 --> 00:06:24.279 Like, let's just give it a moment. I'm just wondering when. Okay, 103 00:06:24.279 --> 00:06:27.319 wait, I know when you're going to It's going to be when you 104 00:06:27.399 --> 00:06:30.519 hit that new goal on the on the scale, or when your body changes, 105 00:06:30.680 --> 00:06:32.680 or when you make x amount of money, or when you have this 106 00:06:32.759 --> 00:06:35.560 amount of followers, or when he texts you back, or when he decides 107 00:06:35.600 --> 00:06:39.360 to this, that and the third, or when you decide when you ever, 108 00:06:39.399 --> 00:06:42.079 when you make the next move. This is da da da. I 109 00:06:42.079 --> 00:06:45.319 am here to tell you this. And I'm almost going to be twenty eight, 110 00:06:45.360 --> 00:06:46.959 Okay, So i feel like I'm getting really older and wiser at this 111 00:06:47.040 --> 00:06:50.079 point, and like I'm not that old, but like I'm getting wiser. 112 00:06:50.120 --> 00:06:56.600 Okay, if you are waiting for something outside of you to almost give you 113 00:06:56.639 --> 00:07:00.720 that confirmation of yes, now I'm hot, Yes, now I'm worthy, 114 00:07:00.040 --> 00:07:04.240 Yes, now I'm lovable. You will be waiting a very long time. 115 00:07:04.839 --> 00:07:08.680 And this is a thing that I also don't want you to gas light yourself 116 00:07:08.680 --> 00:07:11.600 on, is thinking, well, no, like when I've hit that goal, 117 00:07:11.639 --> 00:07:15.839 I did feel hotter, or you know, when I find the guy 118 00:07:15.879 --> 00:07:19.120 that really I think is really attractive. You know, now I do realize 119 00:07:19.120 --> 00:07:23.720 that I'm a trying Okay, So there is obviously some things that you can 120 00:07:23.759 --> 00:07:27.160 do in your life which will allow you to kind of decide that you're hotter, 121 00:07:27.279 --> 00:07:29.600 you are worthy, or you are enough, or that you're lovable or 122 00:07:29.639 --> 00:07:32.040 whatever. But at the end of the day, there's always going to be 123 00:07:32.279 --> 00:07:38.560 something if you constantly are always waiting for that external validation. But I realized 124 00:07:38.560 --> 00:07:46.600 that my story in my life was I was chasing the acknowledgment and love that 125 00:07:46.639 --> 00:07:49.399 I didn't get from a parent that wasn't giving it to me. And then 126 00:07:49.600 --> 00:07:57.839 I started to recreate that same type of chasing pattern with society, with friends, 127 00:07:57.879 --> 00:08:01.240 with men, with everything in my life. And this is not to 128 00:08:01.360 --> 00:08:07.560 always bring it back to the parents and blame and whatever. And obviously I've 129 00:08:07.879 --> 00:08:13.920 really healed a lot, honestly from that relationship that I didn't necessarily have with 130 00:08:13.959 --> 00:08:18.399 my father, But there's definitely something to say and see within your own story 131 00:08:18.480 --> 00:08:26.639 because realistically, this waiting to decide that you are enough or lovable or valuable 132 00:08:26.879 --> 00:08:33.440 or hot enough or whatever, this waiting usually has to do with something in 133 00:08:33.480 --> 00:08:35.919 your own personal life that you've already kind of gone through. You know, 134 00:08:37.159 --> 00:08:41.120 maybe you weren't good enough for your mom or your dad, or maybe you 135 00:08:41.159 --> 00:08:45.600 didn't get enough acknowledgement from parents or friends around you. Maybe you were growing 136 00:08:45.679 --> 00:08:50.639 up in environments where no one was really you know, uplifting you or pursuing 137 00:08:50.679 --> 00:08:54.720 you or picking you, and that was that was me. I even in 138 00:08:54.759 --> 00:09:00.799 my high school years. You know, I wasn't necessarily the most favorite type 139 00:09:00.840 --> 00:09:05.600 of look or you know, I didn't have like all of the friends. 140 00:09:05.639 --> 00:09:09.159 I was pretty likable, but like, you know, whatever it is. 141 00:09:09.840 --> 00:09:13.480 But I realized that I was just like no matter what it was, whether 142 00:09:13.519 --> 00:09:16.000 it was me being really young and shy, me in high school, me 143 00:09:16.120 --> 00:09:20.519 in college, there was always this energy of waiting, waiting and on top 144 00:09:20.559 --> 00:09:24.759 of that doing my very best to continue to try and get that approval from 145 00:09:24.759 --> 00:09:28.919 other people. Like I was waiting for people to finally tell me that I 146 00:09:28.919 --> 00:09:31.360 was pretty enough by working on myself and doing this, and then I would 147 00:09:31.360 --> 00:09:35.120 show up or I'd post an Instagram photo and then I'm like waiting for the 148 00:09:35.320 --> 00:09:37.399 likes and then I'm like, oh, okay, now I'm lovable. But 149 00:09:37.519 --> 00:09:43.080 guess what, that's fleeting because the likes drop and then people are onto the 150 00:09:43.120 --> 00:09:45.840 next thing, and you got to keep it up. You got to constantly 151 00:09:45.879 --> 00:09:48.759 keep it up. And what I realized was, I am so sick and 152 00:09:48.799 --> 00:09:52.480 tired of trying to keep it up. I'm so tired of trying to taste 153 00:09:52.519 --> 00:09:58.559 people and convince people that I am lovable and that I am enough. And 154 00:09:58.600 --> 00:10:01.320 the most wise thing that I I came to realize honestly in my life was 155 00:10:03.480 --> 00:10:07.559 once you actually decide that you're hot enough, that you're lovable enough, that 156 00:10:07.600 --> 00:10:11.759 you are just enough, that's when people start to decide that you are as 157 00:10:11.759 --> 00:10:15.720 well. And it's weird to think because it's like we're always taught to just 158 00:10:16.080 --> 00:10:18.360 you know, change yourself more for yourself, like wait around and like you 159 00:10:18.399 --> 00:10:22.320 know these people like this, so just like be like that person more and 160 00:10:22.360 --> 00:10:26.039 then you'll be loved. But realistically, there is so many people out in 161 00:10:26.080 --> 00:10:28.840 this world that like so many different types of things. And this is not 162 00:10:28.919 --> 00:10:33.320 about you conforming to what other people want and need. But the end of 163 00:10:33.320 --> 00:10:37.519 the day, it's like to think that you can't be who you are and 164 00:10:37.600 --> 00:10:43.159 be enough is it's just flawed thinking. So, how do you stop wasting 165 00:10:43.279 --> 00:10:48.000 your twenties hating yourself? And honestly, this could be thirties, forties, 166 00:10:48.000 --> 00:10:52.519 whatever age like even younger, right, how do you stop wasting your life 167 00:10:52.840 --> 00:10:56.159 hating yourself? And this is the thing, it's like we're waiting for this 168 00:10:56.320 --> 00:11:00.320 answer, like, Okay, Alicia's gonna give me this answer, and it's 169 00:11:00.320 --> 00:11:05.279 going to be like, you know again, this external thing that she's gonna 170 00:11:05.279 --> 00:11:07.360 give me that I can implement in my life. But the answer, really 171 00:11:07.480 --> 00:11:13.600 and truly is you just have to decide. You just have to decide that 172 00:11:13.720 --> 00:11:16.759 you are enough. And now, how do you decide that you are enough? 173 00:11:16.840 --> 00:11:20.440 How do you decide that you can look into the mirror and be like, 174 00:11:20.559 --> 00:11:24.600 I'm hot, I'm pretty, I'm successful, everything I've done is good 175 00:11:24.720 --> 00:11:30.639 enough? Like whatever you have to tap into unconditional love. So this is 176 00:11:30.679 --> 00:11:35.840 the thing. Most things in life are honestly on condition, especially love. 177 00:11:35.960 --> 00:11:41.120 And you know, it's okay to have certain things on condition when it comes 178 00:11:41.120 --> 00:11:43.720 to like relationships and just for yourself, right, it's kind of this, 179 00:11:43.879 --> 00:11:46.840 like it's this energy of like discipline, the masculine energy, the expectation. 180 00:11:48.080 --> 00:11:50.159 You know, Okay, well you need to be a good person, then 181 00:11:50.200 --> 00:11:52.639 you'll get rewarded or like, you know, you need to show up this 182 00:11:52.679 --> 00:11:56.039 way in a relationship and then you'll be able to be worthy kind of a 183 00:11:56.080 --> 00:11:58.360 having a relationship. Like obviously, like as human beings, we should be 184 00:11:58.440 --> 00:12:01.120 worthy of having things in our lives in general, like food and water and 185 00:12:01.159 --> 00:12:05.600 love and this that. But obviously there's also like certain things on conditions, 186 00:12:05.639 --> 00:12:09.080 like okay with women, like I'm not going to just date a bum who 187 00:12:09.080 --> 00:12:13.080 does nothing with this life, who contributes no way financially, who doesn't treat 188 00:12:13.080 --> 00:12:15.080 me right, who cheats on me, who does all these things, Like 189 00:12:15.120 --> 00:12:20.679 obviously you have certain expectations. But honestly, what I've found is most of 190 00:12:20.759 --> 00:12:24.639 society and relationships, whatever it is, jobs, like money, findances, 191 00:12:24.679 --> 00:12:30.639 everything, it's all on condition. Everything is so conditional. If you do 192 00:12:30.720 --> 00:12:33.960 one thing, you're done. If you make one mistake, oh my god, 193 00:12:33.000 --> 00:12:37.639 it's the worst thing ever. And like that is just it's again it's 194 00:12:37.720 --> 00:12:41.639 flawed thinking because we're human beings. Since we have to understand we are human 195 00:12:41.679 --> 00:12:43.320 beings, we are going to mess up. We are human beings. We 196 00:12:43.480 --> 00:12:48.919 have came on this earth with flaws, like physically flaws or honestly, you 197 00:12:48.960 --> 00:12:50.840 don't even have to look at them as flaws. But I'm just saying that 198 00:12:50.879 --> 00:12:54.000 as a word because we all kind of understand that. But realistically they're only 199 00:12:54.000 --> 00:12:58.360 flaws because we say that they're flaws. There's and this is a crazy part, 200 00:12:58.440 --> 00:13:01.519 right there are people who literally think your flaws are the most beautiful thing, 201 00:13:01.559 --> 00:13:03.080 and then you think they're not because you've been raised around people who said 202 00:13:03.080 --> 00:13:07.600 that that was a flaw, like things like that. But practicing unconditional love 203 00:13:07.720 --> 00:13:11.480 with yourself will be the best thing you could possibly do to allow you to 204 00:13:11.519 --> 00:13:16.320 just wake up and just put down the negativity, put down the self hate, 205 00:13:18.080 --> 00:13:22.399 put down the old programming, and just say I am enough, I 206 00:13:22.480 --> 00:13:24.360 am enough, I am enough. And I really do think the thing that 207 00:13:24.440 --> 00:13:30.240 really helped me kind of just surrender into this unconditional love for myself and other 208 00:13:30.279 --> 00:13:35.919 people is simply just realizing that I'm burning myself out trying to be this picture 209 00:13:37.000 --> 00:13:41.080 perfect version of me. I went through so many cycles, and I'm going 210 00:13:41.159 --> 00:13:43.600 to talk about this a lot in my book that's coming out in January. 211 00:13:43.639 --> 00:13:50.879 But I started to recognize how I was creating this shell of a human being 212 00:13:50.960 --> 00:13:56.360 because I was so not unconditionally loving to myself. I told myself that I 213 00:13:56.399 --> 00:13:58.159 needed to have a certain specific body type, and I had to look a 214 00:13:58.159 --> 00:14:03.679 certain way in my mind. Hair and my face, and my personality and 215 00:14:03.799 --> 00:14:07.519 my social media and my friendships and my relationships and my finances. They all 216 00:14:07.559 --> 00:14:13.960 had to be so goddamn particular that the way in which I tried to attain 217 00:14:13.000 --> 00:14:18.759 these things were so hard and so unrealistic that I kept falling off and going 218 00:14:18.840 --> 00:14:24.720 into these cycles and binge eating and overspending because I was so stressed, and 219 00:14:24.759 --> 00:14:28.440 then putting myself on this restrictive whatever it was to try and make up for 220 00:14:28.519 --> 00:14:33.039 all of the mistakes quote unquote mistakes that I did. And I just kept 221 00:14:33.120 --> 00:14:35.320 doing these cycles until I realized that is not the way that I'm going to 222 00:14:35.320 --> 00:14:39.519 get anything in my life. I had to be okay with the fact that, 223 00:14:39.600 --> 00:14:43.879 yes, right now, my body doesn't look perfectly perfect like the girls 224 00:14:43.919 --> 00:14:46.480 on social media. I had to be okay with the fact that my skin, 225 00:14:46.600 --> 00:14:50.679 Yeah, it wasn't the clearest, but I still was going to go 226 00:14:50.759 --> 00:14:54.120 out and still pursue my dreams or whatever it was. I was still going 227 00:14:54.200 --> 00:14:56.679 to go on dates. I was still going to do whatever I had to 228 00:14:56.679 --> 00:15:00.360 be okay with the fact that, you know, my hair is not straight 229 00:15:00.480 --> 00:15:03.240 like my friends, It's not straight. Can we get through this? Can 230 00:15:03.279 --> 00:15:07.519 we just embrace this yet, because like at this point, me not embracing 231 00:15:07.600 --> 00:15:11.240 it, me not being okay with the fact that I was different, led 232 00:15:11.279 --> 00:15:13.000 me to straining my hair to the point where I was burning my hair off 233 00:15:13.039 --> 00:15:16.120 because it just wasn't healthy form my hair type. Like, there's just certain 234 00:15:16.159 --> 00:15:18.720 things that I kept doing in my life that I realized, like I am 235 00:15:18.919 --> 00:15:24.279 literally creating a whole new version of me that is just not even healthy anymore 236 00:15:24.320 --> 00:15:28.120 because I'm having these conditions on myself and how I think that I need to 237 00:15:28.159 --> 00:15:31.799 show up in this world. And I just wasn't deciding that I was good 238 00:15:31.960 --> 00:15:35.720 enough the way that I was, and like other things that I would do 239 00:15:35.919 --> 00:15:39.759 when I was younger. I'm pretty sure if I can remember, I put 240 00:15:39.799 --> 00:15:46.440 this in my book, But I would always wait till summer to live my 241 00:15:46.559 --> 00:15:48.080 life, or like, the only thing that I would think about during winter 242 00:15:48.360 --> 00:15:52.240 was getting my body ready for summer. And then when summer came, and 243 00:15:52.320 --> 00:15:58.159 I never quote unquote had the perfect bikini body because I'd had these unrealistic expectations 244 00:15:58.159 --> 00:16:00.960 about myself. I wouldn't go I wouldn't go to the beach. I would 245 00:16:02.080 --> 00:16:04.320 hide my body. I would be so incredibly uncomfortable. I would be so 246 00:16:04.399 --> 00:16:08.240 incredibly uncomfortable with the clothes that I was wearing. In high school, I 247 00:16:08.240 --> 00:16:11.960 would wear these like big, huge sweaters. I would wear these long I 248 00:16:11.960 --> 00:16:15.799 remember specifically, and I think I've talked about this before. I'm not too 249 00:16:15.840 --> 00:16:19.279 sure, but I remember specifically. It was a hot ass day. It 250 00:16:19.360 --> 00:16:23.720 was so goddamn hot middle of summer, and I was walking around with my 251 00:16:23.759 --> 00:16:29.000 friends and I was wearing this like one of those windbreaker type of vibes. 252 00:16:29.039 --> 00:16:30.720 So it wasn't like the hottest jacket in the world, but it was a 253 00:16:30.799 --> 00:16:34.200 jacket, and it was long sleeves, and it was huge. But I 254 00:16:34.279 --> 00:16:38.480 loved it because it was able to cover like my little muffin top that I 255 00:16:38.600 --> 00:16:42.399 used to have when I would wear my jeans, which is so normal, 256 00:16:42.840 --> 00:16:45.919 and I just but I hated it so much, so like anytime that I 257 00:16:45.960 --> 00:16:48.799 would wear T shirts, I just didn't like how I had like a little 258 00:16:48.840 --> 00:16:52.320 muffin top. So I would wear these big jackets so it can kind of 259 00:16:52.320 --> 00:16:59.679 cover that. And so I was so incredibly insecure that I was walking in 260 00:16:59.720 --> 00:17:03.639 the heat outside with my friends. I think I don't even I think I 261 00:17:03.679 --> 00:17:07.160 was wearing shorts, but I was so hot, I was sweating. I 262 00:17:07.160 --> 00:17:10.359 had probably had like armpit stains because I was so freaking hot, and I 263 00:17:10.440 --> 00:17:15.039 just would not take off that jacket and just be so incredibly just free and 264 00:17:15.119 --> 00:17:18.920 okay, because I was that insecure about something that, yes, in that 265 00:17:19.039 --> 00:17:22.839 moment, it felt like the biggest hole, like the biggest deal in the 266 00:17:22.839 --> 00:17:26.279 whole entire world, but it really was not, and it took away the 267 00:17:26.359 --> 00:17:30.759 quality of my life. I was literally so uncomfortable to the point where of 268 00:17:30.799 --> 00:17:33.759 course I wanted to go home quicker. I wanted to just stay in my 269 00:17:33.839 --> 00:17:36.960 room and just go on Tumblr and just like scroll and you know, be 270 00:17:37.119 --> 00:17:40.799 my little cocoon because it just didn't feel okay. And now, listen, 271 00:17:40.839 --> 00:17:42.960 it doesn't mean that you can never change anything about yourself. When you were 272 00:17:44.000 --> 00:17:48.160 unconnially loving and starting to accept yourself. But I mean in terms of okay, 273 00:17:48.559 --> 00:17:52.039 being comfortable and just being happy in my own skin. I could have 274 00:17:52.240 --> 00:17:56.759 easily just done that by taking off my jacket, but I just couldn't do 275 00:17:56.880 --> 00:18:00.119 it. I just felt like it was like I like so many people would 276 00:18:00.240 --> 00:18:03.640 see my body and they would hate it whatever. And the truth is the 277 00:18:03.640 --> 00:18:07.480 goddamn truth of it all. It was just me. It was just me 278 00:18:07.599 --> 00:18:11.599 looking at myself saying, you're not good enough. You have to wear this 279 00:18:11.680 --> 00:18:14.799 jacket. You're not good enough. And listen what I want to say to 280 00:18:14.839 --> 00:18:17.240 the people, especially in high school, because people in high school can be 281 00:18:17.319 --> 00:18:21.079 rude. You might have people in your life who say, m you don't 282 00:18:21.079 --> 00:18:22.559 look good enough or oh my god, she has this or that, but 283 00:18:22.599 --> 00:18:29.599 that is their opinion, and you cannot live life for other people who, 284 00:18:29.759 --> 00:18:33.160 by the way, do not give an f about you, because if they 285 00:18:33.200 --> 00:18:36.480 cared about you, they wouldn't make you uncomfortable and say, oh my god, 286 00:18:36.680 --> 00:18:38.279 look at your body. You couldn't wear that, you shouldn't wear that, 287 00:18:38.319 --> 00:18:41.039 you should take you should wear your freaking hot ass jacket, and you 288 00:18:41.039 --> 00:18:45.519 should be super uncomfortable in life. People care about you who don't say that 289 00:18:45.559 --> 00:18:48.079 to you. People who care about you don't want you to be uncomfortable. 290 00:18:48.279 --> 00:18:52.799 The people that I care about, I want them to be as comfortable as 291 00:18:52.839 --> 00:18:56.279 possible. You want to wear an outfit that doesn't look the exact same as 292 00:18:56.319 --> 00:18:59.720 mine, and we have completely different styles, but you feel comfortable in that. 293 00:19:00.119 --> 00:19:03.640 Let's go out anyways. I don't care. I want to be around 294 00:19:03.640 --> 00:19:07.680 people who are comfortable around me, and I want to be comfortable around myself. 295 00:19:07.960 --> 00:19:11.640 Gone to the days where I'm surrounding myself with people, places, things, 296 00:19:11.720 --> 00:19:15.119 everything where I am not allowed to be myself. But this is the 297 00:19:15.119 --> 00:19:18.000 thing. It always starts from within, because at the end of the day, 298 00:19:18.039 --> 00:19:19.720 yes, you might have people out here being like, ooh, you 299 00:19:19.720 --> 00:19:22.960 can't wear that, or you look ugly in that, or this girl's hot 300 00:19:22.960 --> 00:19:25.960 and you're not hot. This girl's hot, or this is the beauty standard, 301 00:19:26.000 --> 00:19:29.480 or this is I don't care. You have to decide. And the 302 00:19:29.519 --> 00:19:33.480 best part about you saying I don't care. I'm gonna do what I want 303 00:19:33.519 --> 00:19:37.680 to do because I am comfortable and like this makes me comfortable. Is people 304 00:19:37.759 --> 00:19:41.960 have one of two options. They will conform and look at you and accept 305 00:19:42.000 --> 00:19:45.240 you and be like, oh, Okay, well that's how she wants to 306 00:19:45.519 --> 00:19:48.480 dress or whatever. That's great, Okay, I'm gonna let her be like 307 00:19:48.519 --> 00:19:51.160 that because you know, she wants to dress like this or whatever. And 308 00:19:51.240 --> 00:19:53.640 on top of that, they're gonna find something so incredibly sexy and amazing and 309 00:19:53.640 --> 00:19:57.240 beautiful about you because you decided to stand in your worth or number two, 310 00:19:57.359 --> 00:20:00.079 they're gonna fall off and they're gonna say I don't like that, and you're 311 00:20:00.119 --> 00:20:03.880 gonna go, I don't care. This is me and I'm living my life 312 00:20:03.880 --> 00:20:07.279 for myself, and they will go and you will find other people who vibe 313 00:20:07.319 --> 00:20:10.440 with you, and that is just that. So why is it that we 314 00:20:10.559 --> 00:20:15.400 are choosing an option, a third but honestly very invalid option of saying, 315 00:20:17.079 --> 00:20:19.480 Okay, well, I'm just gonna I'm gonna just keep conforming. I'm just 316 00:20:19.480 --> 00:20:22.440 gonna keep conforming to what this person likes. And then I'm gonna meet this 317 00:20:22.480 --> 00:20:26.680 person over here and they're gonna like this thing about the way that women dress, 318 00:20:26.799 --> 00:20:30.880 or you know, they want their friends to wear this color or that 319 00:20:30.039 --> 00:20:33.920 style or talk like this or be interested in that thing. So I'm just 320 00:20:33.960 --> 00:20:37.599 gonna do that. And then when that's not gonna be enough because these people 321 00:20:37.599 --> 00:20:41.480 don't fucking like you or really care about you in the first place. I'm 322 00:20:41.480 --> 00:20:45.640 gonna go over here and I'm gonna try this thing. When is enough enough? 323 00:20:45.759 --> 00:20:48.079 When are you going to decide that that is enough? When are you 324 00:20:48.119 --> 00:20:52.200 going to decide that you are tired? Are you tired? I don't know 325 00:20:52.240 --> 00:20:55.920 about you, but I am super tired from that, like genuinely. I 326 00:20:55.960 --> 00:20:59.559 mean, you know, it's been a long time since I've really gave that 327 00:20:59.640 --> 00:21:03.960 much of a about what other people think about me. But I was so 328 00:21:03.160 --> 00:21:07.400 incredibly tired of the thoughts that ran through my head but how I needed to 329 00:21:07.480 --> 00:21:11.759 look and be in order for people to like me. I honestly just think 330 00:21:11.799 --> 00:21:15.599 that, you know, like how people talk about the Roman empires, like 331 00:21:15.640 --> 00:21:19.880 how men always think about the Roman Empire. And there was this girl who 332 00:21:21.039 --> 00:21:25.559 said on TikTok, my Roman Empire is being skinny. How she like always 333 00:21:25.559 --> 00:21:27.839 thinks about being skinny every single day, like it consumes her, like you 334 00:21:27.839 --> 00:21:30.839 know, the clothes she would wear if she was skinny, or the things 335 00:21:30.839 --> 00:21:33.039 that she would do if she was skinny. I used to also be like 336 00:21:33.079 --> 00:21:37.519 that as well. Sorry, my camera heated up, but what I was 337 00:21:37.559 --> 00:21:41.119 saying about the Roman Empire was that was so me in high school. Every 338 00:21:41.160 --> 00:21:47.680 single day I would just think about what would life would be like if I 339 00:21:47.799 --> 00:21:49.680 was skinny, or I had this body, or I had this that and 340 00:21:49.799 --> 00:21:52.400 third and again. This is not to mean that we can never have goals 341 00:21:52.400 --> 00:21:55.880 in our lives and you can never want to change. But changing from a 342 00:21:55.880 --> 00:21:57.680 place of self hate never got me anywhere. My whole entire fucking book is 343 00:21:57.720 --> 00:22:00.880 about that, Okay, And honestly, this is what happened for me. 344 00:22:02.799 --> 00:22:06.720 I realized that I was so burnt out by having, let's say, being 345 00:22:06.759 --> 00:22:10.759 skinny my Roman Empire, and I decided that I no longer wanted it to 346 00:22:10.799 --> 00:22:14.160 be my Roman Empire. Aka, I no longer wanted to like think about 347 00:22:14.200 --> 00:22:17.799 it all the time and have even when I had like a really unhealthy relationship 348 00:22:17.799 --> 00:22:21.400 with food, I was so done thinking about food all of the time. 349 00:22:21.559 --> 00:22:23.279 I was like, can I just have a normal life? But I had 350 00:22:23.279 --> 00:22:26.119 to decide. I had to decide, you know what, I'm going to 351 00:22:26.160 --> 00:22:30.200 stop caring so much about my appearance right now. I'm going to stop caring 352 00:22:30.240 --> 00:22:33.400 about, you know, if I'm this skinny or if this guy's gonna like 353 00:22:33.440 --> 00:22:36.359 me or if I'm going to be this popular or like have this many likes 354 00:22:36.400 --> 00:22:40.119 or this that I had to stop caring so much about that. I had 355 00:22:40.160 --> 00:22:42.319 to drop that. I had to decide that I was good enough. And 356 00:22:42.359 --> 00:22:48.279 then what happened was this, Once I decided I was able to actually pick 357 00:22:48.359 --> 00:22:51.559 up healthy behaviors in my life. I healed my relationship with food. I 358 00:22:51.599 --> 00:22:55.559 healed my relationship with my body image. I got the fittest, the healthiest 359 00:22:55.599 --> 00:22:59.880 I've ever been, my mental health on fucking ten. I healed my relationship 360 00:22:59.920 --> 00:23:02.519 with food. And none of those things are my Roman Empire anymore. None 361 00:23:02.519 --> 00:23:06.039 of those things consume my day to day seriously, even when it comes to 362 00:23:06.119 --> 00:23:08.759 relationships, and like men, honestly, like, there ain't no Roman Empire 363 00:23:08.920 --> 00:23:15.079 man in my head constantly taking up fucking space in my head rent free. 364 00:23:15.160 --> 00:23:18.079 I just I don't do that. But you know why, It's because I 365 00:23:18.160 --> 00:23:22.400 decided, you know what, I'm gonna be good enough. I'm gonna decide 366 00:23:22.440 --> 00:23:26.200 to unconditionally love myself. I'm gonna decide that yes I have flaws, and 367 00:23:26.279 --> 00:23:29.079 yes my body's not where I want it to be, and yes I made 368 00:23:29.079 --> 00:23:33.559 certain mistakes in my life or yes I'm there's gonna be somebody that's always gonna 369 00:23:33.559 --> 00:23:34.440 be prettier than me, or skinnier than me, than hotter than me, 370 00:23:34.680 --> 00:23:37.559 have nicer hair than me, better skin than me, cooler than me, 371 00:23:37.680 --> 00:23:41.440 younger than me, fresher than me. Who gets a fuck. And I'm 372 00:23:41.519 --> 00:23:45.119 still good, I'm still good enough, I'm still hot, I'm still beautiful, 373 00:23:45.160 --> 00:23:48.559 I'm still x y and z okay. I decided that. And what 374 00:23:48.759 --> 00:23:53.839 happened was my actions that came from me deciding I was enough made me glow 375 00:23:53.960 --> 00:23:57.960 up even more. I ended up embracing more of my natural beauty. I 376 00:23:59.000 --> 00:24:03.240 ended up embracing my hear, embracing my body, embracing my style, embracing 377 00:24:03.240 --> 00:24:07.640 my own uniqueness, you know, started going for what I actually wanted in 378 00:24:07.680 --> 00:24:10.799 my life instead of trying to do everything that everyone else was doing. And 379 00:24:10.839 --> 00:24:14.720 even when it came to you know, like even like jobs or how do 380 00:24:14.720 --> 00:24:17.480 you make money that I decided to be a contract creator. I decided to 381 00:24:17.480 --> 00:24:21.359 do all these things in my life because I decided that I was good enough, 382 00:24:21.680 --> 00:24:23.599 you know. And this is another thing when it comes to just even 383 00:24:23.880 --> 00:24:26.400 you know, I could even bring into content creation. People are always asking 384 00:24:26.480 --> 00:24:29.720 like they're trying to find the answer of like, well, how did you 385 00:24:29.759 --> 00:24:30.599 start it? How did you do it? And I need tips? I 386 00:24:30.640 --> 00:24:34.079 decided, I decided I was good enough. I decided that what I'm saying 387 00:24:34.119 --> 00:24:37.799 on this podcast right now was good enough for someone else to hear. I 388 00:24:37.880 --> 00:24:40.839 decided, am I perfect? No? Could somebody say it better than I 389 00:24:40.880 --> 00:24:44.519 could? Probably is somebody prettier than me that could probably say it in more 390 00:24:44.519 --> 00:24:48.400 an eloquent way, and they're more successful and they have more followers. Yes. 391 00:24:48.759 --> 00:24:51.920 Does that mean I'm going to not live my life? No, and 392 00:24:51.960 --> 00:24:55.799 you shouldn't either. You should not let what other people are doing or not 393 00:24:55.880 --> 00:24:59.960 doing really fucking affect how you move through life, honestly, And I just 394 00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:02.960 I think with so many crazy things that are going on in the world right 395 00:25:02.960 --> 00:25:04.319 now, and on top of that, in my own personal life, there's 396 00:25:04.359 --> 00:25:08.279 been so many weird things that have been happening to people, And of course, 397 00:25:08.279 --> 00:25:12.680 because I'm getting older, I just don't I'm not really interested in wasting 398 00:25:12.720 --> 00:25:17.839 more of my time and my energy waking up and deciding that I'm not good 399 00:25:17.960 --> 00:25:22.799 enough, looking in the mirror and nitpicking all my flaws, or just telling 400 00:25:22.799 --> 00:25:26.440 myself I'm not good enough. It feels so much better to sit here and 401 00:25:26.480 --> 00:25:30.880 be like, Yep, I'm enough, Yep, this outfit looks amazing on 402 00:25:30.920 --> 00:25:33.480 me, Yep, my hair looks amazing, Yep, my skin is fucking 403 00:25:33.559 --> 00:25:38.039 amazing. Or yep, my smile is great, or Yep. Everything that 404 00:25:38.079 --> 00:25:41.119 I said in this relationship or everything that I'm doing in this relationship is good 405 00:25:41.200 --> 00:25:45.839 enough. I don't have to change anything. I don't have to go back 406 00:25:45.839 --> 00:25:48.839 and think about all the ways it should have been different or Nope, I'm 407 00:25:48.880 --> 00:25:55.319 good enough. It is honestly freeing, and it's a practice. And I 408 00:25:55.359 --> 00:26:00.160 think that there's many factors that play into the reason why it's hard for us 409 00:26:00.200 --> 00:26:02.759 to just be like, I'm enough. And this is actually what I want 410 00:26:02.799 --> 00:26:07.359 to talk about in next week's episode. The pressure to be pretty, the 411 00:26:07.440 --> 00:26:12.759 pressure to be perfect, the pressure that we have in our own lives that 412 00:26:12.880 --> 00:26:18.559 constantly have us going from Okay, I'm gonna accept myself and love myself and 413 00:26:18.559 --> 00:26:19.640 then three seconds later, oh fuck, I need to change my whole entire 414 00:26:19.680 --> 00:26:23.039 life. Because you know what, it's not just all in your head, 415 00:26:23.119 --> 00:26:27.079 right, It's there's so many things that happen around us. Social media, 416 00:26:27.279 --> 00:26:30.279 the people that you've grown up around. Obviously there's things that I've talked about 417 00:26:30.319 --> 00:26:34.319 in this episode, but I want to give you some tips in that episode 418 00:26:34.359 --> 00:26:41.519 of like how to practically kind of get in this tunnel vision of no longer 419 00:26:41.640 --> 00:26:45.880 letting the pressures of society make you feel like you're good you're not good enough, 420 00:26:45.119 --> 00:26:48.640 And there will always be there will always, always always be pressures, 421 00:26:48.759 --> 00:26:53.839 but there's definitely ways in which that you can navigate those pressures of everyone else's 422 00:26:53.839 --> 00:26:59.359 opinions and everyone else's you know, lens in which they look through the world. 423 00:26:59.440 --> 00:27:03.440 But today I just wanted to send this message, however long this episode 424 00:27:03.519 --> 00:27:06.799 is going to be, just to make you think, I just want you 425 00:27:06.880 --> 00:27:10.680 to sit on this question, and I just want you to just like really 426 00:27:10.839 --> 00:27:12.799 like take it in. Like when is it that I'm going to stop hating 427 00:27:12.880 --> 00:27:17.880 myself? Like when when is it in my brain? When the plan was 428 00:27:17.920 --> 00:27:21.279 to stop this when I'm twenty eight years old, when I'm twenty five, 429 00:27:21.880 --> 00:27:25.519 when i'm twenty three, when i'm forty. Maybe I'll stop when i have 430 00:27:25.640 --> 00:27:30.960 kids. Maybe i'll once that guy marries me, then I'll stop hating on 431 00:27:30.000 --> 00:27:34.200 myself. Then I'll stop second guessing myself. Then I'll stop comparing myself. 432 00:27:34.519 --> 00:27:37.799 When I get one hundred K in the bank account, then that's when I'll 433 00:27:37.839 --> 00:27:42.680 think that I've made it. Or when my body i'm ten pounds lighter, 434 00:27:44.559 --> 00:27:48.240 that's when I'll accept what I see in the mirror. Come on, and 435 00:27:49.000 --> 00:27:53.119 again, this is not to mean that you can't work on yourself and glow 436 00:27:53.200 --> 00:27:57.440 up and change yourself and whatever. But I will tell you this, it 437 00:27:57.519 --> 00:28:00.200 is going to be so much easier for you to lose that ten pounds, 438 00:28:00.400 --> 00:28:03.519 or it's going to be so easier for you to have more confidence in relationships. 439 00:28:03.599 --> 00:28:07.160 It's going to be so much easier for you to hit that hundred k 440 00:28:07.359 --> 00:28:11.839 financial goal of yours when you first decide, you know what, I'm actually 441 00:28:11.839 --> 00:28:17.920 okay right now without it, Because what will happen is the actions in which 442 00:28:17.920 --> 00:28:21.960 you take from a place of self love will get you there quicker. It 443 00:28:22.000 --> 00:28:27.319 will be sustainable. You will pick up healthy eating behaviors, healthy movement behaviors, 444 00:28:27.559 --> 00:28:33.200 healthy work schedules, and you know, productivity, all of these things 445 00:28:33.240 --> 00:28:37.440 in which these things will become a part of your normal natural way of life, 446 00:28:38.039 --> 00:28:44.000 and you will you'll get everything that you need instead of only using healthy 447 00:28:44.079 --> 00:28:48.279 behaviors to a means to an end. This is not what we should be 448 00:28:48.319 --> 00:28:52.119 doing. We should just be eating healthy just to get the lose the ten 449 00:28:52.160 --> 00:28:56.440 pounds. We should eat healthy because it's something we should do forever. We 450 00:28:56.440 --> 00:29:00.279 shouldn't only wake up and just be productive just so you can get an end 451 00:29:00.319 --> 00:29:03.000 goal. We should learn how to be productive so we have more time to 452 00:29:03.079 --> 00:29:07.920 live our lives to get things done in a more efficient way. And this 453 00:29:07.920 --> 00:29:11.400 doesn't mean you always have to be productive, but like a lot of the 454 00:29:11.440 --> 00:29:15.400 things that we are really trying to do are things that we should just already 455 00:29:15.720 --> 00:29:18.039 have been doing throughout our lives. And why we're trying to pick these things 456 00:29:18.160 --> 00:29:22.039 up is to have that end goal, in which we would have already had 457 00:29:22.039 --> 00:29:25.000 the end goal if these just were normal parts of our lives. But we 458 00:29:25.079 --> 00:29:30.720 only use these healthy behaviors and habits just for the end goal. And it 459 00:29:30.759 --> 00:29:33.440 doesn't mean you can't obviously use some of these things as a way to get 460 00:29:33.440 --> 00:29:36.519 to your end goal. But it's like, okay, then what do you 461 00:29:36.519 --> 00:29:38.079 do when you get to the end goal? You just drop the healthy eating. 462 00:29:38.319 --> 00:29:41.559 People always say oh no, no, no, like once I hit 463 00:29:41.599 --> 00:29:44.880 the once I lose ten pounds, I'll be happier, happier, and I'll 464 00:29:44.880 --> 00:29:48.559 be healthier. This doesn't mean that you won't be happy and healthy when you 465 00:29:48.599 --> 00:29:52.279 hit that goal. But what people don't understand is because you didn't use the 466 00:29:52.319 --> 00:29:56.720 healthy behavior in a way of like a normal, consistent thing in your life, 467 00:29:57.279 --> 00:30:00.160 you kind of looked at it as like this is like a punishment, 468 00:30:00.240 --> 00:30:03.839 or oh, I just have to do three more days of this, two 469 00:30:03.839 --> 00:30:06.599 more days of this, one more day of this, and then I can 470 00:30:06.640 --> 00:30:11.400 be free. That's not, in my personal opinion, how you should be 471 00:30:11.680 --> 00:30:15.359 living, because it's like you should just be eating healthy because it's a normal 472 00:30:15.400 --> 00:30:17.359 thing and doesn't mean that you always have to eat healthy. I don't know. 473 00:30:17.759 --> 00:30:18.680 It's just something I've been thinking about. So I just want you to 474 00:30:18.680 --> 00:30:21.400 think about this. When is it that you're gonna be done, When you're 475 00:30:21.400 --> 00:30:23.200 gonna stop hitting yourself and listen, I'll tell you this. If you're younger 476 00:30:23.240 --> 00:30:26.319 than me, I hope that I can save you some years of self hate 477 00:30:26.359 --> 00:30:30.319 by just reminding you that you just actually are gonna have to decide at some 478 00:30:30.359 --> 00:30:33.359 point, so you might as well decide now. And it's a journey. 479 00:30:33.559 --> 00:30:37.759 Of course, doesn't mean you can't work on yourself. But I'm telling you 480 00:30:37.759 --> 00:30:41.160 you're gonna get not only you're gonna get your goals quicker, but you're just 481 00:30:41.200 --> 00:30:45.559 gonna free up so much time and space in your mind and your life to 482 00:30:45.680 --> 00:30:49.480 actually experience life outside of having being skinny be your fucking Roman empire, or 483 00:30:49.519 --> 00:30:52.519 you know, waiting for summer and then you're gonna live your life, or 484 00:30:52.519 --> 00:30:55.960 like waiting for a god to text back and then you're gonna have a happy 485 00:30:56.039 --> 00:30:57.400 day. You're gonna have like this great day. Now I can go and 486 00:30:57.440 --> 00:31:02.279 like work on myself because he texts me back. Oh my fucking god. 487 00:31:02.359 --> 00:31:04.880 Well, can we please stop with that? Anyways? I think that's gonna 488 00:31:04.880 --> 00:31:08.519 be it for today's episode. It is ranted forever because it just really wants 489 00:31:08.559 --> 00:31:12.720 you to decide, and there's no waiting. There's no waiting. You think 490 00:31:12.759 --> 00:31:17.559 it's such an illusion for you to think that there's just there's gonna be this 491 00:31:17.640 --> 00:31:19.359 time and then you can decide that you're gonna just be. You can be 492 00:31:19.359 --> 00:31:22.880 happy now, you can be okay with yourself. Now, you can accept 493 00:31:22.880 --> 00:31:25.680 yourself. Now, please do that, do that for me. If you 494 00:31:25.720 --> 00:31:27.559 can't do it for yourself, to do it for me, but then that's 495 00:31:27.599 --> 00:31:30.079 a kind of a contradiction because you should really be doing it for yourself. 496 00:31:30.079 --> 00:31:33.079 But anyways, I hope you guys enjoyed. Next week we're gonna be talking 497 00:31:33.079 --> 00:31:36.839 about the pressure to be perfect, and I'll definitely continue to talk about this 498 00:31:37.519 --> 00:31:41.279 and more practical ticks that I have implemented in my life to kind of keep 499 00:31:41.279 --> 00:31:44.240 myself in that tunnel vision to really be able to love and accept myself. 500 00:31:45.559 --> 00:31:48.400 And yeah, I hope you guys enjoyed. I hope you guys like the 501 00:31:48.799 --> 00:31:52.000 new setup. Also, if you are listening on Spotify or Apple, if 502 00:31:52.000 --> 00:31:55.599 you could give me a star review, preferably five, I would love that 503 00:31:56.279 --> 00:31:59.920 just so we can get the podcast out to more women, because that's the 504 00:32:00.079 --> 00:32:01.680 goal. Everyone needs to hear this message. I know it. And also 505 00:32:01.759 --> 00:32:06.279 I do have the podcast Instagram, the Globes Podcast. If you ever want 506 00:32:06.279 --> 00:32:08.279 to tag me and show me that you're listening to this episode, I will 507 00:32:08.440 --> 00:32:12.960 post on there. And of course I just have quotes and just fun things 508 00:32:13.039 --> 00:32:15.920 and I do Q and a's over there. So make sure that you're following, 509 00:32:15.119 --> 00:32:17.960 and make sure you're subscribed to the YouTube channel if you are not already, 510 00:32:17.960 --> 00:32:21.000 and I'll see you guys in the next one. Bye.